brown, bad n' bothered: Recent Episodes
Andrea Kurian
Join Andrea as she unravels social norms, issues, and expectations that bother girls across the globe.
Grab your cup of chai and settle down for honest and insightful chats regarding mental health, body shaming, freedom, bitchy aunties, friendships, beauty standards, double standards, relationships, and more!
In today’s episode, Ayesha (@ayeshacoaching), a somatic mindset coach, joins the podcast to explain the science and practice behind various coaching and therapy styles such as Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). We uncover the power of our unconscious minds and the impacts it has on limiting beliefs, neuro pathways and individual perspectives. Ayesha’s goal is to empower everyone, especially those within the queer and South Asian community, to be themselves fearlessly. Ayesha is a cycle breaker whose work heavily concentrates on eradicating limiting beliefs, brown girl guilt and abandoning your authentic self.
Grab your chai and get ready for an educational, insightful & relatable episode.
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Follow Ayesha at https://www.instagram.com/ayeshacoaching/
Follow me at https://www.instagram.com/brownbadnbothered/
Need help with finding the right South Asian Therapist? Check the directory below!
BIPOC Therapy Directories: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1__MQSgObiX2UGxVacb7lOn6uAcqrQP475qLI93i3mmI/edit?usp=drivesdk
In today’s episode, the extremely talented, multifaceted, content-creating queen Alisha (@alishabhojwani_) joins the podcast to dig deep into her self-love journey that was ignited after redirecting her career and ending a ten-year relationship. Today’s episode is a proper girly pop chit chat about confidence, self-love, dating culture, friendships, redirection and solo travelling (and so much more tbh)! Get ready for some insightful, entertaining and chaotic dialogues.
Grab your chai and get ready for an educational, insightful & relatable episode.
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Follow Alisha at ://www.instagram.com/alishabhojwani_?igsh=eTR3ODBsem5kMWl
Follow me at https://www.instagram.com/brownbadnbothered/
Need help with finding the right South Asian Therapist? Check the directory below!
BIPOC Therapy Directories: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1__MQSgObiX2UGxVacb7lOn6uAcqrQP475qLI93i3mmI/edit?usp=drivesdk
The rise of “cycle breakers” has taken social media by the horns, but what does being a cycle breaker actually mean and how does it relate to generational trauma? How does being a cycle breaker help overcome numerous health issues and general concerns for yourself and future generations? Tune in to find out, because in this episode Andrea uses her experience growing up with parents, who are cycle breakers, to highlight the importance of taking a stand and breaking negative patterns. It all starts with you!
Grab your chai and get ready for an educational, insightful & relatable episode.
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Follow me at https://www.instagram.com/brownbadnbothered/
BIPOC Therapy Directories: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1__MQSgObiX2UGxVacb7lOn6uAcqrQP475qLI93i3mmI/edit?usp=drivesdk
Brown Bad and Bothered is Back!! In today’s episode, Andrea gives us some insight into her 2023, where she took a break from podcasting. Today’s chat includes conversations surrounding burnouts, breakups, identity crises, depression, hyper independence and learning to slow down.
Grab your chai and get ready for a relatable episode.
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Follow me at https://www.instagram.com/brownbadnbothered/
BIPOC Therapy Directories: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1__MQSgObiX2UGxVacb7lOn6uAcqrQP475qLI93i3mmI/edit?usp=drivesdk
Mrinal Gokhale, author of Saaya Unveiled: South Asian Mental Health Spotlight, is an Indian-American writer and advocate from Milwaukee. Mrinal has done a lot of work within various minor communities, hoping to expand mental health awareness and destigmatize the issue. Today's chat, inspired by topics covered in her first book, explores the impacts critical parenting, academic pressure, model minority myth, religion, and gender roles have on mental health and its healing journey. We also discuss culturally competent therapists, neurodiversity, and men’s mental health through the South Asian lens. Mrinal is currently wrapping up on her second book, an extension of the real-life mental health stories of Saaya Unveiled. Grab your chai and ENJOY!
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Read Saaya Unveiled: https://www.amazon.com/Saaya-Unveiled-Mental-Health-Spotlighted-ebook/dp/B092Y9132V
Check out Mrinal’s projects: https://linktr.ee/mgokhale?fbclid=PAAaanCVUhU3Cp8AActl7261Ay8XhSYU-xsIXTetm0bEo5No_eO2ce_9coaIw
Follow Mrinal https://instagram.com/mrinalg_?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
Follow me for more content https://instagram.com/brownbadnbothered?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
Back from a hiatus to navigate various life changes, Andrea is back with a raw and vulnerable self-reflection of the most important lessons learned in 2022. While I choose to share specific details about my personal life, this is a reminder to stay kind and respectful to individuals involved in this episode. It's taken time to feel confident and comfortable sharing this episode, so I hope this episode is as cathartic and insightful for you as it has been for me! Stay safe, stay strong and stay putting yourself first x
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Gurpreet, the ultimate bestie-estie-estie, joins this episode to help ME answer YOUR questions. That’s right, we dive into all the friendship, mental health, dating, and parenting questions you threw at us. The best part? You also get to hear our favorite friendship stories of each other. We even do a bit of (crappy) karaoke. Get your cup of chai, settle down for some serious older didi advice and chaotic cackling.
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Follow Gups at https://www.instagram.com/gurnotsopreety/
Watch Gups at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCkTSo5LaQ0PeD9s9ON5Dgkw
Follow me at https://www.instagram.com/brownbadnbothered/
BIPOC Therapy Directories: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1__MQSgObiX2UGxVacb7lOn6uAcqrQP475qLI93i3mmI/edit?usp=drivesdk
Diya, @kajaldiaries, drops some serious advice & knowledge regarding financial literacy, confidence and planning! Not only does Diya address concerning trends, like educated women from challenging industries still putting financial planning aside or onto their men, but the impacts that these mindsets have on women and future generations. From culture shunning women from money talk to building financial wealth as homemaker, this conversation offers lessons for any women, at any age. It’s time we have an honest chat about the F word: FINANCES.
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Follow Diya at https://www.instagram.com/kajaldiaries/
Follow me at https://www.instagram.com/brownbadnbothered/
Check out these financial resources:
Money and Mimosas: https://financialelevationllc.com/money-mimosas/
Savvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/
Boss Betis: https://www.instagram.com/bossbetis/
Finasana: https://www.instagram.com/finasana/
Stay tuned for more episodes.
Sania Khan, talented South Asian photographer and dear friend, was killed by ex-husband, Raheel Ahmed. Sania was an integral member of the South Asian space and was an advocate for creative careers and finding happiness and beauty in life. Sania publicly opened up about the hardships she faced while filing for divorce and leaving an abusive relationship. She reminded women that they aren’t alone and that our society needs to do a much better job in supporting women and their right to safety. Today’s episode will celebrate Sania, including memories submitted by loved ones, but also address divorce stigma. lack of support, femicide and how we enable men.
IMPORTANT - I, unfortunately, forgot to mention Sania’s Memorial Scholarship Fund in the episode, DONATE here at
https://generositytrust.fcsuite.com/erp/donate/create/fund?funit_id=2041
The Sania Khan Memorial Scholarship will be awarded to a female graduate of Chattanooga School for Arts & Sciences (CSAS), with a minimum high-school GPA of 3.5, and a desire to further her education in fine arts through the UT system.
Readings on Femicide & Gender Violence:
https://www.peacefuldumpling.com/why-i-speak-up-about-femicide-rape-misogyny-in-india
https://asiafoundation.org/2018/03/14/four-things-know-gender-based-violence-asia/
https://article-14.com/post/the-silent-pandemic-of-violence-against-india-s-women--60e27646b30ae
RESOURCES/CONTACT DETAILS:
USA National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233 or by texting 'START' to 88788."
AUSTRALIA Call 1800 737 732 or reach out via the online chat on this website.
INDIA Women in Distress Call 1091, Women Helpline Domestic Abuse call 181
PAKISTAN National Helpline Call 1099 or download app “Helpline 1099”
CANADA 24-hour Crisis Line: 773.278.4566
UK National Domestic Violence Helpline is available on 0808 2000247 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
www.nationaldomesticviolencehelpline.org.uk
Natasha, Relationship & Divorce Coach, doesn’t hold back in this episode. Despite having some of the best, heart-wrenching, blood pumping, and truly wholesome romantic movies - many South Asians are lost when it comes to off-screen healthy relationships. Tune into this episode to learn about how societal norms and culture impacts our ability to find and maintain healthy long-term love. Natasha (@natashacoaches) also shares the reality about divorce, its stigma, and finding faith in one’s post-divorce era. But it’s not all sad stuff, we talk about the power of reconnecting, elevating intimacy, and finding your own happiness. We giggle and gasp over our shared irritation for dangerous dating trends and gender double standards over sexual needs. Whether you are single or taken, this is a thoroughly inspiring and genuinely informative chat. Now grab your chai and tune in!
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Don’t miss out on….
Following Natasha: https://www.instagram.com/natashacoaches/
No More Small Talk FB Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/nomoresmalltalk
FREE GUIDE "Ten ways to create a stronger, move loving, joy filled relationship”
https://subscribepage.io/relationship-thrive
Want more Brown Bad n’ Bothered?
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https://www.instagram.com/brownbadnbothered
Nancy Diaz, a trauma-informed specialist who is inspired by her own personal experiences, works closely with WOC and daughters of immigrants. In this episode, we dive deep into WOC trauma trends, realizing the very similar experiences WOC across all cultures and societies share. Nancy clears my doubts and questions over intricate theories and issues such as generational, childhood, and historical trauma. We explore what trauma means, due to the long-lasting impacts of historical events, for the Native American, African American & Aboriginal communities. Basically, I learned ALOT. From micro-aggressions, finding the right therapist, soul care to brain spotting, this convo is information-rich so make sure to clean up your ears!
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BIPOC Therapy Directories: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1__MQSgObiX2UGxVacb7lOn6uAcqrQP475qLI93i3mmI/edit?usp=drivesdk
Contact Nancy for Soul Care vs Self Care workshop recording at info@globalcitizentheraphy.com
Follow Nancy on https://instagram.com/globalcitizentherapy?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
Follow the pod on https://instagram.com/brownbadnbothered?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
Navneet Gill, Canadian certified counselor, joins this episode to have an open chat about brown parenting and it’s long lasting impacts across generations. Despite being raised in different generations, Navneet (@navneetgillcounselling) and I share strikingly similar experiences when it comes to battling mental health issues alone, surviving the pressure of society, and being badass cultural rebels. While the new generation is sure about what they want and don’t want to do as future parents, Navneet shares advice when it comes to implementing healthy parenting practices despite ever-lasting generational gaps. Get ready for a truly insightful and tender heart-warming episode that bonds two generations together.
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Make sure to check out Navneet at https://instagram.com/navneetgillcounselling?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
Follow on instagram for more content from me:
https://www.instagram.com/brownbadnbothered
Is it just me or do all desi parents say the same irritating and bizarre things that drive us up the wall? Did they all attend the same parenting orientation? In this episode, Andrea chats about some go-to phrases that many brown kids are sure to find relatable and equally frustrating. How do these phrases affect children and young adults in the long run? Is it time brown parents learn to keep these phrases out of their mouths? Tune in to find out.
Bonus: catch up on a mini life update from Andrea
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Follow on instagram for more content from me:
https://www.instagram.com/brownbadnbothered
Urvi, a certified life coach, joins this episode to break down all things mindfulness. With expertise in mindfulness, breathwork & meditation, Urvi (@innerserenitylc) explains everything you need to know in order to start integrating mindfulness in your life. Most importantly, WHY you should start practicing it! We connect the dots between relatable brown girls' problems and the role mindfulness has in healing from our experiences in the South Asian community. Urvi also gives information on what to realistically expect from a life coach and debunks some myths! Don’t wait for things to magically get better - listen now and learn how to make your life more peaceful and fulfilled.
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Make sure to check out Urvi at https://www.instagram.com/innerserenitylc/
Listen to us chat about Brown Girl Self Love on Urvi’s podcast - https://podcasts.apple.com/ae/podcast/soul-diaries-discover-your-inner-serenity/id1551497839?i=1000551873737 !!!
Follow on Instagram for more content from me:
https://www.instagram.com/brownbadnbothered
Poonam, a 21-year-old CEO of Virtue Mental, joins this episode to chat about the great impact destigmatizing mental health has on one’s wellbeing journey. Poonam (@thepoonamrahman) is a psychology, neuroscience AND management senior, determined to provide free resources for marginalized groups. We chat about our own mental health experiences while covering topics such as bullying, finding support, education as a tool and starting a business in the middle of a pandemic.
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Make sure to check out Poonam at https://www.instagram.com/thepoonamrahman
And her NPO, Virtue Mental (@virtuementalorg) at https://www.instagram.com/virtuementalorg/
or their website here: https://www.virtuemental.org/
If you are interested in volunteering or helping out with Virtue Mental, feel free to contact Poonam!
Follow on Instagram for more content:
https://www.instagram.com/brownbadnbothered
Did you know insecurities aren’t just tied to body image or relationships? In this episode, Andrea dives into the basics of insecurities. She discusses the common signs, main causes, and different types of insecurities that exist. More so, Andrea bares all when it comes to the insecurities she has faced due to being cheated on, PCOS, Dubai’s insane beauty standards, & embracing her brown skin.
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Payal, a South Asian body positivity activist, joins this episode to chat about the various themes and "shakey" moments from the latest season of Love is Blind. Payal (@desianklet) shares her first-hand experience with the reality tv show, leaving us both in fits of laughter. We also dive deep into relevant & controversial topics such as body inclusivity, dating preferences, internalized racism, physical attraction, getting the ick, double standards and “keeping it real”
Make sure to follow Payal on https://www.instagram.com/desianklet/
Follow the podcast for more insight and content on https://www.instagram.com/brownbadnbothered/
There’s nothing quite like the clash of cultures and finding your identity as children of immigrants. In this episode, Urmi (@urmamio) shares her unique yet relatable experiences as an Italian-born-and-raised Bengali. Urmi and Andrea explore what it’s like to grow up trying to assimilate to one culture yet stay true to their parents’ heritage. From double standards, feeling left out, making friends, proving our worth, accents, finding love to defining our own identities, today’s episode is sure to hit home for many children of immigrants and third culture kids.
Make sure to follow Urmi at https://www.instagram.com/urmamio/
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Follow on https://www.instagram.com/brownbadnbothered/
Some interesting reads on Child of Immigrants and TCK:
Guilt as Children of Immigrants:
https://www.risingkashmir.com/Why-children-of-immigrants-experience-guilt--90611
Mental Health Needs:
https://www.thinkglobalhealth.org/article/children-immigrants-and-their-mental-health-needs
Parenting as Immigrants
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/parenting/wp/2017/02/01/how-the-immigrant-experience-shapes-what-i-teach-my-children/
Third Culture Kid Dilemma:
https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20161117-third-culture-kids-citizens-of-everywhere-and-nowhere
Struggles of a TCK:
https://www.internations.org/magazine/three-things-all-third-culture-kids-struggle-with-39417
Advantages and Advice for TCK:
https://growingupbilingual.com/raising-third-culture-kids-why-its-an-advantage/
Valentine’s Day can be a touchy subject for those who are single and taken. Society has done an unfortunately good job at marketing love and Valentine’s to fit a one-size-all template that doesn’t match everyone’s ideal display of affection or love language. While Valentine’s can be a great time to reflect and celebrate, Andrea explores her journey and different phases that are relatable to most. From using Valentines as a test of love, suppressing disappointment and resentment for years, feeling left out, and to now finding a healthy way to celebrate the occasion that makes sense for her & her partner. Tune into to episode and make sure you don’t make the same mistakes as Andrea did this Valentine's.
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Follow on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/brownbadnbothered/
Want to know YOUR love language? Here Is the Love Language Quiz: https://www.5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/love-language
By now, many of us are aware of how media and Bollywood have normalized stalking and sexual harassment and the impact it’s had off-screen. However, in this episode, Andrea focuses on how media and traditional gender roles have enforced control in relationships and even conditioned us into thinking controlling behaviors are a show of care and love. What are examples of a subtle and extreme controlling partner? She also explores the science behind the attraction to dominant men and how media romanticizes negative dominant traits - blurring the lines of what is healthy and unhealthy.
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Follow on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/brownbadnbothered/
Further reading & sources:
Gender & Power Dynamics –
https://bit.ly/genderpowerdynamics
Controlling Behavior, Signs, Causes and What to Do –
https://bit.ly/controllingpartner
20 Signs Your Partner is Controlling –
https://bit.ly/3uhAewW
Do Women Prefer Dominant Men? –
https://bit.ly/studyondominanttraits
Raising Voices to End Male-Dominated Power Dynamics –
https://bit.ly/3AIejQV
We spend so much time worrying about how people view us and if we are "nice enough"...but the real question is - how kind are you to yourself? Andrea navigates the impacts of a harmful inner critic and explores the importance and benefits of positive self-talk. Self-talk can actually be helpful in keeping us motivated toward goals and an overall healthy well-being, so join into the conversation to learn how to be your biggest supporter.
Let's take a look into Andrea's 2021 that was filled with academic growth, alone time and mental breakdowns. What battles did she win? What did she unlearn? What made her sad? Tune in to find out.
Do you struggle with conflict? Does the thought of confrontation put you on edge? Have all your bottled-up emotions resulted in you being aggressive in confrontations? Do you feel guilty when expressing your needs, thoughts, and concerns? Andrea addresses our inner conflict with confrontation while diving into her journey navigating confrontation and healthy communication as a girl inside and outside the brown community.
Wowza! In this week's episode, Andrea shares her listeners' toxic friendship storytimes. From backhanded compliments, trying to steal boyfriends, taking advantage of money, victim-blaming, and straight-up disrespect, it feels like everyone has had some sort of horrible toxic friend in their life. Listen to stories that are relatable while experiencing Andrea's unfiltered first reaction to some jaw-dropping events. And if you stick until the end, get inside scoop to a shocking but hilarious storytime from Andrea's life!
So thrilled to have Sania on the show this week! Sania is a South Asian professional photographer based in Chicago. We dive into the mentally exhausting, challenging yet hopeful journey of embarking on creative careers as a brown girl. Sania shares funny, memorable, and emotional stories of her journey, along with advice, that will leave you feeling inspired and seen.
Make sure to follow her on Instagram at @itssaniak - Follow @brownbadnbothered on insta for more content and BTS!
Are you a persistent over-thinker or have an underlying fear of failure? Let's find out in this episode as Andrea dissects what overthinking is and how to break the habit. While she shares her own personal struggles, Andrea also explores the ways in which brown culture can promote overthinking behaviors and the correlation it has with achievement anxiety or fear of failure.
Andrea invites her first guest, David, to reflect on their approach to love and relationships while answering fun, thought-provoking, and personal questions. Join in for this chat and be ready to hear a lot of giggles and potential eyebrow-raising moments.
Andrea shares a storytime of what started off as a prank set by young immature boys but led to her being stalked. She details the way in which her frustration and experience were disregarding by her peers due to the normalization of certain behaviors and mindsets regarding safety, persistence and stalking. What happens when victims are ignored? What role does stalking play in other crimes such as femicide? Listen to find out.
Today's episode unravels the core effect parenting can have on people-pleasers. Andrea also studies and explores the connection people pleasers have with achievement anxiety and anxious attachment tendencies in relationships.
Have you felt unloved in your relationship? or felt like your partner wasn't reciprocating your romantic efforts? Well, love languages could be the missing link and the cause of the miscommunication and rut you are in. And if you're single- listen up to avoid making the mistakes many couples make! What are love languages and how can you make them work in your love life?
Join Andrea as she unravels cultural and social norms and expectations that bother brown girls across the globe.
Grab your cup of chai and settle down for honest and insightful chats regarding mental health, body shaming, freedom, bitchy aunties, friendships, beauty standards, double standards, relationships, and more!