Making Midlife Magic: Recent Episodes
Rachel Baum
I'm a college professor turned life coach who helps middle aged people learn to dream again. In each episode, I'll share magic so you can feel passion for the future and create a life that truly delights you!
Music: Oleksandr Stepanov, penguinmusic - Bright Energetic Electronica, Pixabay
"I don't have time for self care." My brain often tells me this, and yours probably does too. It's so easy to believe we don’t have time to care for ourselves. In this episode, I flip that script by asking, “What can I do in just two minutes?”
I share simple, quick practices that support our nervous system by creating connection, calm, and flow. From listening to a single song and dancing, to sending a voice text to a friend, to going outside between zoom meetings, these small acts shift our energy in meaningful ways. I hope this episode inspires you to make your own list of two-minute resets so you can build daily routines that support yourself and always have some easy tools to help yourself, even on your hardest days.
🧭 Download your free copy of The Clarity Compass — five grounded, soul-supporting questions to help you cut through the noise, quiet your overthinking, and know your next step. Grab it here → http://compass.coachingwithrachel.com
Let me know how it works for you! DM me or email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
"Do or do not do. There is no try." Sorry, Yoda, but this is not helpful. In fact, if we want to do big things, we have to find all the options between Do [do the thing the way we most want to] and Do Not [quit]. I call these "escape hatches," and they are one of the ways I got to 100 podcast episodes -- My Big Thing.
Whether your Big Thing is starting a business, publishing a novel, being a step-parent, or learning to play the cello, this episode is for you. In it, I share three things that got me to episode 100. I learned a lot from the experience, but honestly, not what I expected to learn.
🧭 Download your free copy of The Clarity Compass — five grounded, soul-supporting questions to help you cut through the noise, quiet your overthinking, and know your next step. Grab it here → http://compass.coachingwithrachel.com
Let me know how it works for you! DM me or email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
Do you feel confident? If you're like me, chances are the answer is -- Sometimes? It can be hard to be confident, especially when things change so much. We're not always sure what to do, how to respond. Confidence is fueled by certainty, which is why so often we find ourselves unconfident. If we can't know how something will work out, how can we be confident about it? This lack of certainty often leads us to overthink decisions, feel tentative, and second guess ourselves.
The good news is that we don't have to be sure of everything to be confident; we just have to be sure of something. Take a listen to this episode to learn how to create confidence by letting your brain find what it can be certain about.
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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Take another listen to this powerful episode from 2023. If we want our life to be a work of art, we need to get real about what it's like to be an artist.
Your life is your art. It sounds so pretty, doesn't it? We're artists, shaping the canvas of our life. It sounds so good, but we have art wrong.
To embrace our life as art, we have to get real about art as well as about our lives. Art, like life, is full of self-doubt and failure.
In this episode, I highlight three powerful truths about art that we can use to see our lives differently. These powerful truths increase self-compassion, self-trust, and let us see the beauty in our messy, imperfect lives, as they are right now.
Take a listen and let me know what your art is! I'm at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com or dm me on social media.
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
To receive my emails (love notes delivered right to you!), sign up here
If you're curious about whether coaching is a good fit for you, sign up for a consultation
This is one of my most popular episodes (#73). There are so many things that steal our joy -- the news, other people, and even our own thoughts and actions. Some days, joy feels impossible when the world is so broken. It was true a year ago when I recorded this episode and it's true now.
If you want to take your joy back, this episode is a good place to start.
This episode focuses on our nervous system and how it shapes our everyday experience, often before our minds even catch up. I share a helpful way to connect with our nervous system by thinking of it as an animal (such as a hummingbird, turtle, or dog). Thinking of ourselves in this way lets us step away from judgment and move toward compassion. Instead of criticizing ourselves for being “too sensitive” or “not strong enough,” I explore how we can learn to listen, respond, and care for our nervous systems with curiosity. This shift lets us build self-trust and show up more fully for our lives.
🧭 Download your free copy of The Clarity Compass — five grounded, soul-supporting questions to help you cut through the noise, quiet your overthinking, and know your next step. Grab it here → http://compass.coachingwithrachel.com
Let me know how it works for you! DM me or email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
If you’ve ever said “yes” to something and regretted it later, whether it was a job, a project, or even a social invitation, you're not alone. Me too.
In this episode of Making Midlife Magic, I’m sharing the exact three questions I ask myself before I say yes to anything. These questions have helped me — and my clients — make confident decisions, stop overthinking, and trust ourselves again.
We’ll talk about:
- 🎯 How to tell if something is a true yes or just you trying to talk yourself into it
- 🎯 How to evaluate whether an opportunity aligns with the life you want now, and not just a past version of yourself.
- 🎯 The trade-offs every yes carries (and how to spot them before you commit)
Whether you’re making a big life decision or just deciding how to spend your week, these questions will help you move forward with clarity and confidence.
Free Resource Mentioned in This Episode:
🧭 Download your free copy of The Clarity Compass — five grounded, soul-level questions to help you cut through the noise, quiet your overthinking, and know your next step.
Grab it here → http://compass.coachingwithrachel.com
Let me know how it works for you! DM me or email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
In Episode 159, I talked about "dream shame" -- the shame we feel when we can't dream because dreaming feels too hard. In this episode, I explore the other kind of dream shame, the kind we feel when we do have dreams, but are afraid to admit them. I talk about why dreaming can feel risky, especially when our dreams seem “too big” or “too small” in the eyes of others. . This episode is for you if you need a reminder of why dreaming matters, and why our dreams are worth nurturing and projecting, even if some of our dreams remain unfinished.
In this Episode:
➡️ Why having dreams can make us feel vulnerable and unsafe
- ➡️ How to navigate fears of judgment from others (and from yourself).
- ➡️ Why it's okay—and even powerful—to have “unfinished” dreams.
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I often use a "magic paintbrush" exercise with clients to help them imagine their ideal life, but sometimes, clients don't know what they want. When they try to imagine something different from their current life, they see only a blank canvas. When dreaming feels too far away or too risky, it can bring up discomfort instead of inspiration -- What I call Dream Shame. I explore why it happens and how to address it in ways that make dreaming more possible and less risky, including micro dreams, new feelings, and permission to not have it all figured out. In next week's part two, I'll discuss the other half of Dream Shame -- when we have no problem dreaming but feel embarrassed or hesitant to admit them.
In this episode:
- ➡️ What “dream shame” is and the two ways it often shows up
- ➡️ Why dreaming can feel inaccessible after grief, loss, or disappointment
- ➡️ How to reconnect with desire through smaller, more accessible dreams
- ➡️ The power of focusing on feelings instead of detailed visions
- Mentioned in this episode:
The Three Feelings Worksheet (download here).
This week's episode focuses on something we all experience: self-doubt. Whether you're in grad school or midlife, trying something new often brings up self doubt and questioning such as, Who am I to do this? I've had my own self-doubt, especially when I try something new, and I share my experiences to show that those nagging thoughts aren’t signs to stop, but signs that we’re being brave. Instead of trying to feel more confident, I explore how being less confident in our self-doubt opens up new possibilities.
In this episode:
- ➡️ Why self-doubt often shows up more as we grow and challenge ourselves
- ➡️ Why trying to “feel confident” doesn’t always work and what to do instead
- ➡️ How to normalize self-doubt as a natural human response (like burping!)
- ➡️ How to question your negative thoughts without needing to fully reject or accept them
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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In this episode, I reflect on the life of poet Andrea Gibson, whose vulnerability is an invitation to embrace our own full humanity. Inspired by their passing and my own creative freeze after Trump’s inauguration, I open up about what it means to meet ourselves exactly where we are, without judgment or needing ourselves to be different. This episode is about being with ourselves where we are and meeting ourselves with compassion when we find ourselves in a freeze response.
In this episode:
- ⭐ The power of radical self-acceptance
- ⭐ How to work with, rather than resist, periods of stuckness or grief
- ⭐ Why it’s okay to want things to be different—and how to want from a place of self-love
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Mentioned in this episode:
Andrea Gibson (https://andreagibson.substack.com/)
Send me your favorite lines at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com or dm me on social media
If you want more help, sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
This week, I’m talking about our inner GPS, that full-body knowing we can use to guide decisions, both big and small. I share a personal experience where I ignored my gut instinct and ended up with a bad taste in my mouth, and contrast it with a powerful coaching session that reminded me how to tune back in. It’s not always about perfect clarity. Sometimes our intuition speaks clearly, and other times it needs conversation among our inner parts. But with practice, we can strengthen this muscle and learn to trust ourselves more deeply, which lets us make better decisions.
In this episode:
- 🔥 What a “full-body yes” feels like, and how to notice it
- 🔥 Intuition as full-body knowing
- 🔥 Why we can't always decide, even with intuition, because life is complex
- 🔥 How small, everyday decisions can give us practice in building intuition
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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Email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
Earlier this week I had a chance to give a talk to a group of people in their 80s and 90s. I learned a lot from them! In this episode:
➡️ The importance of a good mindset, and why that doesn't mean we have to ignore the things that are hard
➡️ The role of visualization in growing older
➡️ How to adapt to change and why it's the most important skill we need
Take a listen and let me know what you would add to this list, either from your experience or from learning from people in their 80s, 90s, and beyond!
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In this episode, I talk about what it really means to show up—and why it’s often the missing piece between where we are and where we want to be. In this episode:
➤ Showing up as a commitment to a relationship -- with yourself and your desires
➤ How a "showing up audit" can help you see where you're pulling back
➤ How looking at all the good things our showing up has already created can unlock new courage
➤ Why showing up helps others and how this can increase our desire to be brave
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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Email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
"I'm not willing to avoid discussing politics"
"I'm not willing to watch my grandchildren every weekend."
What are you unwilling to do?
Being unwilling is a powerful way to set boundaries. We decide what is and is not acceptable to us and decide what we are and aren't willing to do. Doing this often feels great!
But then we have to deal with all the uncomfortable feelings.
"I'm not willing" is inherently paired with "I'm willing." Are we willing to have an uncomfortable conversation? Willing to have people be mad at us?
In this episode I focus on setting boundaries and how we can use "I'm not willing" and "I'm willing" together to powerfully shape our lives.
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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When life feels challenging, it can be especially difficult to do things that we know will help. We need to make that doctor's appointment but keep not doing it. Often we just try to bully ourselves into getting things done, but it doesn't work in the long run and makes us miserable.
There is another way! One that puts us in the driver's seat without force, and it starts with two words. Listen to this episode to put this simple tool into your hands.
Mentioned in this episode:
Tiny Experiments by Anne-Laure Le Cunff
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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This week, I'm re-airing episode #14, "Are You Your Own Ride or Die?". I heard it differently this week, as I recovered from taking a tumble and spraining my wrist, as I explain at the beginning of the episode. Whether you want to confidently put yourself out there more, or to take better care of yourself during challenging times, this episode's wisdom is for you.
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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- Check out my website
Do you want to be more resilient? Most of us do. We want to be flexible through life's changes, rather than flattened by them. When things are hard, we want to know that we will bounce back. In this episode, I offer three surprising ways to increase our trust in our ability to bounce back from life's challenges --because being more resilient starts with reconsidering what we think we know about resilience.
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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- Check out my website
This week I'm celebrating episode 150! I take a look back at three of the key takeaways from the last three years. These are tools that have changed my life and that I continue to use every day, and I know they will help you too. Take a listen and let me know what you think!
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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Have you ever struggled to keep up a new habit? Maybe you thought that the secret to success was not to let yourself off the hook. On today's episode I offer that you might very well want to let yourself off the hook. In fact, this might be the very key to showing up fully in your life.
Instead of trying to force ourselves into change, I offer a view of accountability as a relationship between parts of us that want different things. Putting these parts into conversation builds trust, self-compassion -- and also lets us show up fully to our life and goals.
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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Email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
What would be possible if you didn't let fear stand in your way? Would you ask for a raise? Go to open mic night? Start a YouTube channel? Recently, I decided that I no longer want to make decisions from fear -- imagine! In this episode, I explore how fear often masks itself as avoidance and how asking the right questions—like “What am I actually afraid of?”—can shift everything. We can allow fear and even listen to it, without letting it drive our decisions. If you also want to stop making decisions out of fear, this episode is for you.
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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In this episode, I explore one of my favorite topics—belief!, and the surprising ways we hold ourselves back from it. We often feel like we need permission to believe in ourselves, or to believe ideas that support us, especially when belief challenges our identity, feels risky, or seems like something we haven’t yet earned. We also often confuse belief for optimism. I talk about these moments and offer a gentle reminder that we can give ourselves permission to believe -- and that such belief is the foundation for growth & change. If you’ve been hearing the call of something new coming through -- stretching, growing, changing -- or if you want to believe in your own ability to rise to the moment, this episode is for you.
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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You know how sometimes you have thoughts that you don't fully believe but they still hold you back? Things like -- I can't do this; I'm not strong enough? The thing is, our minds are like Little Free Libraries, filled with thoughts we’ve picked up from all over the place — family, friends, social media, even strangers. Often we notice that our internal "shelves" are filled with thoughts we don't even believe, but can't seem to get rid of. The good news? You get to curate what stays on your shelves. In this episode, I walk you through how to notice those unhelpful thoughts, try on new ones that feel better, and how you can powerfully borrow beliefs from people you admire -- or even from your own past self.
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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Email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
Are you feeling drained—even when you’re technically “resting”? You’re not alone. In this episode, I talk about the kind of exhaustion that doesn’t come from lack of sleep, but from the thoughts we carry all day long.
Your mind can be your biggest energy thief—or your most powerful source of renewal.
I’ll walk you through three simple shifts that can help you reclaim your energy, not by forcing toxic positivity or pretending everything’s great, but by learning to intentionally choose thoughts that serve you.
In this episode::
- Why “true” thoughts aren’t always helpful ones
- How to spot your “tired thoughts” (and why they’re draining you)
- What it means to entertain a new thought—and how to do it with curiosity, not pressure
- How I shifted my own mindset around my workload
Check out this episode for practical tools to start feeling more like yourself again.
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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Email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
I've been struggling with current events and feeling 'off,' and I bet many listeners can relate. In this episode, I share three questions that are helping me find my way back to okay—even when things aren’t. It's a brief episode -- perfect for a quick reframe!
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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Email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
In this episode, I explore the power of recognizing and using the resources available to us, especially when we’re facing challenges. Our culture often glorifies independence, but true strength comes from seeing ourselves as part of a web of support. By broadening our perspective on resources—including past experiences, different forms of connection, and unexpected sources of support—we can navigate life’s challenges with more resilience and ease.
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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Email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
Last week, I missed recording my podcast, and I found myself questioning my identity as a weekly podcaster. But then I realized—this was just a blip, and I could decide what it meant. So often, we fear we’re becoming worse versions of ourselves, but what if we believed just as strongly in our capacity to grow? In this episode, I explore how to shift our focus from self-criticism to self-compassion, embrace the process of becoming, and take small, meaningful steps toward the person we want to be.
In this episode:
✅ The thoughts that hold us back from stepping into a new identity
✅ The power of taking small actions
✅ Questions to ask yourself to get unstuck
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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Email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
In this episode, I explore the surprising reasons we sometimes hold ourselves back from happiness—like feeling guilty when others are struggling or believing unhappiness keeps us safe. I share my own experiences, including how I’ve learned to give myself permission to be happy, even when my child is struggling. I also offer three powerful shifts to help us embrace happiness as a source of energy, connection, and strength. Happiness isn’t just for us—it helps us show up better for others, too.
In this episode:
✅ Why it can be hard to feel happy when people we love are struggling
✅ Three surprising reasons we hold ourselves back from joy—and how to challenge them
✅ Practical ways to embrace happiness as a source of energy, resilience, and connection
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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Email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
In this episode, I’m diving into courage—how to build it, how to move forward even when we’re scared, and how to stay connected to our values in challenging times.
I’ve been thinking a lot about the courage of previous generations, especially my grandmother. She faced so many hardships—losing the love of her life, battling cancer, and ultimately having to rebuild her life multiple times. Looking back now, I see how much courage that took. It reminds me that even though we often think about courage as extraordinary, many ordinary parts of life such as aging, facing uncertainty, and navigating life’s challenges all require bravery.
But courage doesn’t mean not being afraid. We often think, “I wish I were braver,” when what we really mean is, “I wish I weren’t scared.” But courage is acting despite fear. It’s making a decision to move forward, even when it’s uncomfortable.
I also share three ways we can build courage in our daily lives:
1️⃣ Reconnect with your core values – Surround yourself with reminders of what truly matters to you.
2️⃣ Take action, even before you feel ready – Courage often follows action, not the other way around.
3️⃣ Build a courageous community – Find people who uplift and support you in being brave.
Take a listen to foster your own courage -- and share it with a friend, so we can build a courageous community together.
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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In this episode, I address the fear and anxiety many of us are feeling due to current events. I discuss the power of language and how the words we use can either escalate or ease our fears. By being more mindful of the language we use, practicing self-compassion, and taking small, intentional actions to reduce fear, we can create a greater sense of calm and control. I offer practical tips for using language that soothes, taking comforting actions, and focusing on one small thing each day that can lessen our fear and help us stay grounded.
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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Email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
Do you start your day with the news and then find yourself feeling down? Or would you just like an easy way to feel stronger, more resilient, less stressed? If so, The Good List is one simple but powerful tool. By intentionally naming what is good in our life, right now, we can train our brains to focus on the good, build emotional resilience, and bring more joy into our daily lives. I share simple ways to start your own good list, either alone or with a friend, to add positive emotional fuel to every day.
Mentioned in this episode:
Tahini Chocolate Challah Buns recipe (from Smitten Kitchen)
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In the United States, today is Martin Luther King, Jr Day. May his memory inspire each of us to work for social justice.
It is also the inauguration day of a leader whose words and actions evoke great anxiety and anger for many of us. I made this special episode to say that I see you and am with you -- and also to highlight the importance of mindset, especially now. We don't need to deny what we're feeling, but we can remind ourselves -- actively and regularly -- that other emotions are available to us, and will be useful to us -- emotions such as courage, conviction, confidence, and connection.
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- Sign up for a free one-hour midlife magic consultation call to discover what you most want for the second half of your life and how coaching can help
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Email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
Do you want less stress & overwhelm? Me too! In this episode, I share a strategy for lowering stress and overwhelm -- not meditation, baths, or exercise, but maybe all of them or something else entirely. Rather than providing a single "right" answer, we're going to experiment together to see what helps. Just the thought "I'm working on this" lowered my stress level and the feelings of dread I was having about returning work after vacation. By running small, personal experiments like adjusting my routine, sketching, and practicing self-compassion, I aim to discover what works best for me to reduce stress and I hope you'll join me with experiments of your own. Take a listen and let me know what you're experimenting with!
Mentioned in this episode:
Martha Beck, Beyond Anxiety: Curiosity, Creativity, and Finding Your Life's Purpose
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What would it mean if we showed up for ourselves with relentless love? What if rather than a relentless self-critical voice, we asked every day, What does love want today?
This may seem like a head-in-the-clouds kind of pondering, but actually, relentless love is how we get things done and how we welcome in real change. In this episode, I explain and also offer four guiding questions that you can use as a daily practice to keep focused on what really matters to you.
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In this New Year's episode, I talk about using storytelling to shape our lives, focusing on how imagining our future—even writing our own “obituary”—can help us see a bigger picture. Rewriting our life story, especially during challenging times, reminds us that our story isn’t finished yet, and allows us to look at life and ourselves with compassion.
In this episode:
➡️ Understand how storytelling can shift your perspective on difficult times and help you see your life in a more empowering light.
➡️ Learn practical ways to imagine telling the story of your life as an older version of yourself
➡️ Discover the power of reframing “failures” and difficult times to change the power they have in your life's story
➡️ Gain tools for writing multiple versions of your story, looking for your core values as through lines.
Mentioned in this episode:
List of core values (James Clear)
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Inspired by the holidays and just in time for the new year, this episode is about hope. I explore the power of holding hope for ourselves, even when our current reality feels far from where we want to be. Hope isn’t about imagining a perfect future, but about recognizing that what we see now is not the only possible reality. By developing a relationship with our future self, we can gain clarity, guidance, and curiosity about how to move forward, even when we don’t have all the answers. I encourage you to be curious about your future self, learn from them, and take small steps toward the future you desire.
This episode shows how to:
➡️ Hold Hope for Yourself: Hope is about believing that your current reality is not the only possibility—both in personal and collective contexts.
➡️ Get Curious About Your Future Self: Instead of self-judgment, approach your future self with curiosity and ask questions to uncover how they figured things out.
➡️ Set Realistic Goals: Develop a healthy relationship with your future self, focusing on small, actionable steps rather than a perfect vision.
➡️ Move Beyond Stagnation: Use hope and curiosity to fuel your next steps, even when things don’t go according to plan or past strategies have failed.
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Are you feeling overwhelmed with the holidays? Do you want to focus on the things that really matter? Me too.
In this episode, I focus on this simple question:
"How can I make my holidays easier?"
While we often focus on what we can do, ease often comes from how we think. Through positive self-talk and focusing on what matters most to us (and letting go of the rest), we can create holiday experiences that feel more like a gift to ourself -- even if we struggle at the holidays. Having your own back and speaking kindly to yourself is truly the greatest gift you can give.
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In this episode, I share a way to look forward to actively creating the coming year -- No resolutions required. Instead of rigid goals, The Year List lets you create a mix of fun, meaningful, and manageable activities you want to do in the new year. By making the goals do-able and reviewing them often, you can stay motivated while avoid the negative self talk that sometimes comes with goal-setting. The Year List lets us look ahead with curiosity and joy, so we can ask the right questions of the new year.
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"I'm Rachel $%&#% Baum and I can do this."
That's the mantra that got me going this week and helped me go from sluggish to motivated. In this episode, I help you create your own personal mantra to keep you grounded and focused during challenging moments. A good mantra is simple, easy to remember, and reminds you who you are. Listen to this episode and create a few powerful mantras that will return you to yourself when you most need it.
******
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In this Thanksgiving episode, I focus on a kind of gratitude we don't practice often -- self-gratitude. Being grateful for ourselves -- for our inner qualities and the choices we’ve made from those qualities -- transforms our relationship with ourselves. I explore how self-gratitude helps us honor our past, present, and future selves while pushing back against the voices that tell us that we can only be proud or grateful for our accomplishments.
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Are you ready to feel defiantly joyful? Defiantly calm? Defiantly loving? If you are, you may have to first stop feeling certain emotions you've been socialized into (eg, caring about how neat your house is, or never disappointing anyone) in order to start feeling powerful and defiant emotions. By intentionally nurturing emotions like defiant love, care, or hope at a time when the world around us may be discouraging these emotions, we can create powerful shifts in our lives and in the world around us. In this episode, I invite you to choose your own defiant emotions and share your journey so we can build a supportive community together.
In this episode:
- 🎯 Reclaim Your Energy: Identify where societal expectations or self-imposed rules are draining your energy, and consciously choose to redirect your energy toward emotions that empower you.
- 🎯 Choose Your Defiant Emotion: Reflect on an emotion that resonates deeply with you—like joy, love, calm, or hope—and defiantly claim it as your focus for as long as you choose.
- 🎯 Take Small, Intentional Actions: Ask yourself daily how you can nurture your chosen emotion, whether through small acts, meaningful connections, or shifting your mindset.
- 🎯 Build a Community of Defiance: I'm still figuring out the details, but stay tuned for ways to connect with others who are embracing defiant emotions so we can inspire & support each other. Until then, let me know how it's going!
Mentioned in this episode:
Rebecca Solnit
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In this episode of Making Midlife Magic, I offer a part 2 to episode 73, Take Back Your Joy. Inspired by a recent paper I wrote on joy in the face of trauma, I explore the idea of joy as a shared, communal experience. Joy isn’t just personal; when we share it with others, we expand our collective capacity for joy. Take back your joy -- for yourself and for all of us.
Mentioned in this episode:
Ep #73: Take Back Your Joy
Saul & Ruby's Holocaust Survivor Band
The Lady in Number 6: Music Saved My Life
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Are you feeling awful since Election Day in the U.S.? I am. Or maybe there's a different reason you're feeling dysregulated -- disconnected, anxious, and wanting to stay in bed. In this episode, I share how intentional acts, like baking an apple cake, helped me calm my nervous system this week. Through my experience preparing a gratitude workshop I gave two days after election day, I learned that genuine gratitude can foster meaningful connection and stability, reminding us to notice "glimmers"—small, positive moments—that help us stay grounded in challenging times.
In this episode:
- Discover practical ways to calm your nervous system during stressful times, like finding small, intentional activities that bring comfort and connection.
- Learn how cultivating gratitude can deepen your resilience and help you feel more connected to the people and things that matter most.
- Understand the concept of “glimmers” as positive, grounding moments that counteract stress and provide stability during uncertain times.
- Get inspired to identify and nurture your own glimmers, building a toolkit for emotional regulation and self-care.
Are you feeling anxious about the election? Or is work stress overwhelming you? In this episode, I focus on navigating stressful situations by tuning into what we can control. When life events or global issues feel overwhelming, it’s natural to feel out of control, but I’ll show you how to find your locus of control to manage your mindset, actions, and self-care. I discuss practical steps for grounding yourself, feeling your emotions fully, and then refocusing on what you can actively influence. Whether it's adjusting your mindset, treating others kindly, or moving forward meaningfully after disappointment, this episode is about finding strength and clarity by directing your mind toward what you can control.
In this episode:
🎯 Learn how to identify your “locus of control” during challenging times to feel more empowered and grounded.
🎯 Discover practical ways to manage anxiety and regain calm by focusing on what you can influence.
🎯 Get actionable tips on maintaining a positive mindset, including managing news intake and protecting your energy.
🎯 Find out how to move forward and treat yourself with compassion, even when life feels overwhelming.
In this episode of Making Midlife Magic, I reflect on the power of choosing our thoughts intentionally, focusing on the thought: "I have everything I need." I explore how this thought can either support or hinder us depending on how we use it, drawing inspiration from the resourcefulness of TV's MacGyver. I share how this thought shifted me out of some work anxiety, and show how we can apply this mindset shift to everyday situations to move forward and solve problems with creativity and confidence.
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If you have comments or questions, please email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
"What's the point of sadness?" a friend asked me. This episode is for her and for you, if you've ever wondered what the point of sadness is, when it doesn't seem to create anything good in our lives. In this episode, I explain why it's essential to embrace this emotion, especially in midlife. I share personal reflections and explore how sadness can be seen as the flip side of desire, connecting us to what we truly want and love. Learn three key insights about sadness and discover practical ways to transform your own relationship with it, turning this often uncomfortable emotion into a tool for growth and deeper connection with others. Whether you're coping with grief, disappointment, or life's transitions, this episode offers valuable strategies to help you navigate sadness and emerge with greater equilibrium.
In this episode:
- Discover why sadness is the flip side of desire and what it reveals about what you truly want in life.
- Learn practical ways to create space for sadness and transform your relationship with it.
- Explore how sadness can connect you to other people and the deeper parts of your humanity.
- Gain insights on how to feel sadness without letting it take over, and find other emotions that can exist alongside it.
Mentioned in this episode:
Maurice Sendak, On Life, Death, and Children's Lit (interview with Terry Gross, 12/29/2011)
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In this episode, I reflect on a powerful question inspired by my dog, Wally: What makes us feel younger? Wally, at 13 years old, becomes a different dog when we cross certain streets—he moves with newfound energy and excitement. I realized this parallels our own lives: what brings that spark of youthfulness back to us? I explore how freedom, agency, and newness can create that feeling, encouraging you to ask: What does this for me? What makes me feel younger, more alive, invigorated?
In this episode:
✅ Discover how a simple walk with my dog sparked a profound question: What makes me feel younger?
✅ Learn about the three key elements—freedom, agency, and newness—that can bring energy and excitement to your life.
✅ Reflect on your own "Oakland Avenue" moments and find ways to bring more joy and vitality into your everyday routine.
✅ Get inspired to reconnect with activities, people, and experiences that give you that spark.
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In this episode of Making Midlife Magic, I reflect on the power of "do overs," inspired by Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year, and my late mother's birthday. I explore how this time of renewal offers us the opportunity to rethink our lives, relationships, and habits, showing how we can all benefit from the grace of starting over—both with others and ourselves. Whether you're working on relationships or overcoming negative self-talk, I'll show you how embracing "do overs" can bring more kindness, compassion, and growth into your life.
In this episode:
✅ Learn how to embrace the concept of a "do over" in relationships and everyday life for more grace and growth.
✅ Discover ways to overcome negative self-talk and reframe how you talk to yourself.
✅ Experience the power of starting fresh at any moment, not only at New Year's or the start of the day.
✅ Get inspired to approach challenges with compassion and offer yourself endless tries to improve and grow.
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In this episode, I share the concept of useful thoughts, and how thinking in this way, rather than true/false can serve us. I share my own experience of self-doubt before a conference (I was a wreck!), and how I helped myself by focusing on what's useful rather than true. While we often think in terms pof positive & negative thoughts, sometimes negative thoughts can be useful and positive thoughts can be not useful. Listen in as I show you how to reframe your thinking to find more ease every day!
In this episode:
✅ The power of shifting your mindset from truth to usefulness
✅ Practical strategies for managing negative thoughts
✅ Why "negative" thoughts aren't always a problem
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If you worry, this episode is for you!
In this episode:
✅ Understand Your Worry Cycle: Learn how to identify and break free from repetitive, anxious thoughts by recognizing that worry is driven by uncertainty.
✅ Practical Tool for Managing Worry: Discover the powerful technique of scheduling a "Worry Hour" to give your concerns focused time, helping you feel more in control and reducing constant mental stress.
✅ Effective Journaling: Gain a journaling method that allows you to release anxious thoughts, providing clarity and peace of mind.
✅ Improved Emotional Balance: Learn how to build a better relationship with your emotions by honoring your worries, addressing them with compassion, and giving your brain what it most needs.
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Are you successful? How do you know?
Often we think about success as something “out there,” something we achieve. Maybe we thought about what success means to us when we were younger, but now it feels too late to reassess.
In truth, middle age and beyond is the perfect time to rethink our definition of success. At this time, we often have a deeper sense of what is truly important to us and what it takes for us to feel successful and fulfilled.
In this episode:
✅ What to do when you feel unsuccessful
✅ How to be more successful by changing the definition of success
✅ How to use the feeling of success to create more of it
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In this episode, I share a powerful filter for making decisions:
Do What Feels Good.
In this episode:
✅ The radically delicious power of choosing to move towards feeling good
✅ How Do What Feels Good builds trust and a greater sense of wholeness
✅ The lies we tell ourselves about feeling good (You won't become a stagnant sloth when you do what feels good, although I'd love you even if you did)
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Sometimes you just have to fake it till you make it. You're giving a presentation and you don't feel ready. You have to be nice to your ex at your best friend's wedding.
But also, sometimes being fake feels terrible. We don't want to fake confidence, we want to feel more confident.
So I'm giving "fake it till you make it" a glow up. We'll take the useful parts of it and leave the rest behind.
In this episode:
✅ How to do things you don't want to without pretending you feel confident or enthusiastic.
✅ Why putting on good clothes really helps
✅ How to feel your way into an emotion by remembering that it's already inside you
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"Remember who you are" seems like solid advice for midlife. It's what I talked about in episode #115. But sometimes we need for forget who we are in order to be someone new.
In this episode:
✅ Why it's hard to do something we haven't done before or to be someone we haven't been before
✅ How to use the power of your mind to help you to start a new habit or to feel more confident
✅ What to do when others won't forget who you are, or who you have been
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There's such power in remembering who we are -- because sometimes as we get older, we forget. We leave parts of us behind, we lose connection with the things we love, we forget how brave, adventurous, or creative we are.
This episode will help you remember. I ask three questions to get you started and show how even if you don't want to pick up tap dancing again, you can use your previous experience to help you with the things you do want, right now.
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Caregiving is hard work. Whether you're caring for an elderly parent, an ill spouse, a child with a disability, or someone else you love, it's challenging to stay afloat in the responsibilities of caregiving. This episode is a love note for caregivers, offering new ways to think about self-care and caregiving.
In this episode:
✅ The pain of setting boundaries and what to do about it
✅ Why it's okay that you can't give your loved one all they deserve
✅ Why relax & take a bath isn't always helpful advice and what might help more
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How often do you have fun? Adult life can be long on responsibility and short on fun, can't it? If you want to have more fun, this is the episode for you! In this episode:
✅ Why it's not always easy to find fun and why sometimes we don't even know what fun means anymore
✅ The importance of choosing fun with our bodies and not just our heads
✅ Why we often treat fun as something exceptional rather than every day and how to change that
✅ How to have fun deepening your relationship with fun
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In this episode, I explore four things I've learned as the mother of someone with depression. I hope this episode is useful even if your child has a different mental health issue, or if the person you love with depression is not your child. I focus on ways of thinking about mental health that prioritize the human-to-human relationship with our loved one.
In this episode:
❤️ The importance of being curious about how other people think and experience the world
❤️ Why believing in someone else's future is the best gift -- especially when that person has depression
❤️ How to plan for O.P.O. (other people's opinions -- you know they're coming!)
❤️ Why people with mental health challenges can feel dehumanized and the importance of keeping relationship and humanity at the center of your awareness.
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Are you feeling the stress of the upcoming U.S. election? Many of us are. (If you don't live in the U.S., bookmark this episode for your next election season) In it, I present the idea of a personal election protocol, a way for you to decide in advance how you want to deal with the ups and downs every election brings. How much do you want to keep up with the news? How much do you want to talk to others about politics? Making these decisions in advance goes a long way in helping us to feel less reactive to the stressors of the season.
In this episode:
✅ Understanding protocols and why they're so useful for our mental well-being
✅ Why you probably want more than one protocol for the election season
✅ Questions to help you develop your protocol -- including the most important question to ask yourself
✅ How to invite in feelings such as commitment and hope, even if you feel despair
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Where will you be in a year? Where do you want to be?
We often use these questions against ourselves. In this episode I talk about a different way of thinking about growth and change, one focused on our feelings.
Do you want to feel different in a year? Do you want to feel more joy, confidence, connection? This episode is for you. I also share information about my new six-week small coaching group, starting next month.
Do you want to learn how to create the emotions that fuel positive change? My small group coaching program, The Year of You, starts next month.
We'll meet Tuesday nights from 7 - 8 pm CST on Zoom from Aug 20 - Oct 1 (no class Sept 24). It will be a supportive group of the best people! If there's a change you want to create in the next year, this is the place to be.
To sign up or for more information, go to coachingwithrachel.com/yearofyou
Imagine knowing that there are people out there who are so happy when you succeed, who want only the best for you.
There are.
These are your good ancestors, and the best news is, you don't have to be biologically related to any of them.
And we too can be good ancestors to those who come after us.
This is a very different way of thinking than is usually encouraged in the United States, where I live, and thinking this way is a great way to tap into our power.
I'm starting my first small group! Magic happens in supportive groups. We'll meet Tuesday nights from 7 - 8 pm CST on Zoom from Aug 20 - Oct 1 (no class Sept 24) for a combination of life-changing teaching and group coaching.
In a group, transformation is magnified and multiplied so even if you are not being coached, you are being coached.
Between sessions, we'll share successes and challenges in a private Facebook group and I'll be there to coach you through it all.
To sign up, go to coachingwithrachel.com/yearofyou
You love a tidy house, but can't seem to stop piling your junk mail on the dining room table. You want to exercise more, but keep hitting the snooze button in the morning.
There are often things that we genuinely want -- and yet, we keep not doing them. In this episode, I share a surprising reason: We don't actually believe we can do it. And we're smart -- Why would we put our energy to something that's impossible?
Believing we can have what we most want is key to making it happen. Take a listen and let me know what resonates!
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Our brains work really hard for us, but most of us ignore them most of the time. We don't take the time to appreciate them, love them, and give them the rest they need.
Respecting our brain, being kind to our brain, and celebrating our brain allows us to perform at a high level in ways that are sustainable. Rather than judging ourselves for not doing more, we focus on all our miraculous brain does for us day after day, which lets our brain show us more magic.
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I promise.
These are such powerful words. Most of us have made promises to other people -- to spouses, partners, children, friends . . . but what about promises to ourselves?
In this episode I explore the power of making promises -- and breaking others. Seeing the promises that shape your current life and deciding what you want to promise yourself moving forward is a powerful way to create a joyful and satisfying life.
If you've ever struggled with setting and achieving goals, take a listen to this episode to see if the language of promises speaks to you. And if goal setting totally works for you, consider adding in a few promises to yourself to take you even further, more joyfully.
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"Someday I'll write a book."
"Someday I'll change careers."
"Someday I'll start dating again."
Do you have someday thoughts like these? If so, how wonderful! Someday thoughts are magical because they're glimmers of our desires. They let us know that we want something different than what we currently have.
The problem with someday thoughts is that too often they stay someday thoughts. What we want is to change someday thinking into now action. We want to move forward on our dreams, so we can give ourselves what we most truly want.
In this episode, I show you how.
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Most of us avoid thinking about death. We think it's depressing and scary. But the fact that we die is what makes life so precious. Facing the reality of death is one way to crystalize what makes our life meaningful. In this episode, I offer three questions to clarify how thinking about death can help you to create a more meaningful, more enjoyable life.
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We all want to be happy -- maybe not all the time, but we do want lightness, joy, and delight in our lives. Yet often things get in the way -- work stress, family conflict, medical diagnoses. At these times, "choosing happiness" can seem like a mean joke.
In this episode I share how we can meaningful choose happy, even when life is challenging. In this episode:
⭐ How happiness is like ice cream and why it's useful to know what flavor you like
⭐ The difference between grown-up happy and pediatric happy
⭐ The power of adding happy to other emotions
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In episode #101, I talk about the thought, "Let it be hard," which is a way of accepting that sometimes life is just hard and it doesn't mean we've done something wrong.
Sometimes, though, we make things harder than they are by judging ourselves or telling ourselves that the hard way is the right way or the better way. At these times, "let it be easy" moves us closer to the life we want. Let it be easy is a way of dropping self-judgment and reminding ourselves that often the easy way is, in fact, the best way.
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Let it be hard.
Not a great start to an inspirational talk, right? When times are tough, we want things to be easier. What kind of suggestion is Let it be hard?
But Let it be hard is exactly the thought that helped me to feel better recently, after a crying meltdown. I tell you all about it in this episode and why Let it be hard might be exactly the magic you need.
And there's more magic on the way. Next week, I'll talk about the companion thought, Let it be easy and explain how these two thoughts function as a dynamic duo.
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"Do or do not do. There is no try." Sorry, Yoda, but this is not helpful. In fact, if we want to do big things, we have to find all the things between Do [do the thing the way we most want to] and Do Not [quit]. I call these "escape hatches," and they are one of the ways I got to 100 podcast episodes -- My Big Thing.
Whether your Big Thing is starting a business, publishing a novel, being a step-parent, or learning to play the cello, this episode is for you. In it, I share three things that got me to episode 100. I learned a lot from the experience, but honestly, not what I expected to learn.
Thank you for helping me to get to 100 episodes! I'm on a mission to help more people over 50 wake up looking forward to the day and the rest of their life. If you enjoy the podcast, can you help me by sharing it with others? Thank you!
And while you're here, I'd love to have you in more of my world!
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We so often want to feel free - light, unburdened, at ease. Yet often we feel burdened by responsibilities and constrained by the choices we've made. At these times, we often dream of a future time when things will be better -- we'll be retired, on vacation, our kids wll be grown, and so on. Focusing on that fantasy keeps us from seeing ways we can feel freer, right now. That's the topic of this week's episode.
My podcast is now two! Celebrate with me by entering my Making Midlife Magic Birthday Giveaway at makingmidlifemagic.com/giveaway. Wondering what to get someone for their 2nd podcast-versary? A review or sharing the podcast with a friend will help me get into more ears, so more people can love themselves & their lives after 50. Thank you so much!
Do you feel confident? If you're like me, chances are the answer is -- Sometimes? It can be hard to be confident, especially when things change so much. We're not always sure what to do, how to respond. Confidence is fueled by certainty, which is why so often we find ourselves unconfident. If we can't know how something will work out, how can we be confident about it? This lack of certainty often leads us to overthink decisions, feel tentative, and second guess ourselves.
The good news is that we don't have to be sure of everything to be confident; we just have to be sure of something. Take a listen to this episode to learn how to create confidence by letting your brain find what it can be certain about.
My podcast is now two! Celebrate with me by entering my Making Midlife Magic Birthday Giveaway at makingmidlifemagic.com/giveaway. Wondering what to get someone for their 2nd podcast-versary? A review or sharing the podcast with a friend will help me get into more ears, so more people can love themselves & their lives after 50. Thank you so much!
What does enough feel like? What would it feel like to know that you have enough, do enough, are enough? Most of us aren't very familiar with that feeling but we're very familiar with the feeling of not enough. Not enough leads us to overwork, overeat, overdrink, and generally just feel bad about ourselves.
In this episode I rethink enough, focusing on it as a decision we can make, and a feeling we can choose. I also talk about the paradoxical relationship between enough and desire. We assume that our desire comes from not enough, from wanting to fill a need. When we aren't seeking a feeling of enough, though, we can just decide what we want because we want it.
This episode is a good follow up to ep #94 about consent and #95 about safety -- because enough is a feeling of safety, while not enough makes us feel unsafe in our world.
My podcast is now two! Celebrate with me by entering my Making Midlife Magic Birthday Giveaway at makingmidlifemagic.com/giveaway. Wondering what to get someone for their 2nd podcast-versary? A review or sharing the podcast with a friend will help me get into more ears, so more people can love themselves & their lives after 50. Thank you so much!
What are your non-negotiables, the things that you make time for, no matter what? Maybe it's a shower, maybe it's running, maybe it's a nightly drink on the patio. Non-negotiables are a superfuel and identifying ours gives us enormous power to shape our lives. Being intentional about our non-negotiables lets us create a life that reflects our values, priorities, and commitments. Take a listen and let me know what resonates -- email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com or tell me about your own non-negotiables in my Spotify Q&A.
My podcast is now two! Celebrate with me by entering my Making Midlife Magic Birthday Giveaway at makingmidlifemagic.com/giveaway. Wondering what to get someone for their 2nd podcast-versary? A review or sharing the podcast with a friend will help me get into more ears, so more people can love themselves & their lives after 50. Thank you so much!
You know how you can go to therapy, read all the books, and still struggle to change? Or how you can know you really feel better when your house is picked up, but still not manage to clean off your desk?
This episode provides one missing piece to the puzzle -- safety. We often don't change because we don't yet feel safe enough to change. In this episode, I offer ways to build safety with ourselves so we can do the things we really want to do without bullying ourselves. It's a powerful companion to episode #94, on consent. Because we need to feel safe in order to say yes, even to things we want to do.
My podcast is now two! Celebrate with me by entering my Making Midlife Magic Birthday Giveaway at makingmidlifemagic.com/giveaway. Wondering what to get someone for their 2nd podcast-versary? A review or sharing the podcast with a friend will help me get into more ears, so more people can love themselves & their lives after 50. Thank you so much!
We know about the importance of consent when it comes to sex. We know that we should only engage in activities we want to and that we should never coerce anyone into doing something they don't want to do.
So it's surprising that we regularly do just that with ourselves. We tell ourselves that we have to do certain things, that we don't have a choice. We have obligations and responsibilities. We're adults. But telling ourselves we have to do something removes our consent, which makes us feel less safe. It also makes us feel heavy and draggy, because we're forcing ourselves to do something we don't really want to do.
The antidote is radical consent, to find a way to say yes to all the parts of our life, even the less fun parts -- or to withdraw our consent and to say no.
My podcast is now two! Celebrate with me by entering my Making Midlife Magic Birthday Giveaway at makingmidlifemagic.com/giveaway. Wondering what to get someone for their 2nd podcast-versary? A review or sharing the podcast with a friend will help me get into more ears, so more people can love themselves & their lives after 50. Thank you so much!
Self-compassion is truly magic. It makes us calmer, more resilient, more self-forgiving, and all-around happier. But too often we don't know how to have compassion for ourselves. We know how to beat ourselves up, to talk harshly to ourselves, to be disappointed in ourselves.
In this episode, I offer two techniques for increasing self-compassion, and suggestions on when to use them, so you can feel better every single day.
It's my podcast's second birthday! Celebrate with me by entering my Making Midlife Magic Birthday Giveaway at makingmidlifemagic.com/giveaway. Wondering what to get someone for their 2nd podcast-versary? A review or sharing the podcast with a friend will help me get into more ears, so more people can love themselves & their lives after 50. Thank you!
Creating the life we want often involves change -- We may want to start new habits or get rid of old ones; to choose a different job or career; to become the next version of ourselves.
Often we focus on how to change but in this episode, I focus on the pace of change. There are two different ways of changing -- changing fast and slow -- and each one runs on its own fuel and requires something different to be successful at it.
The good news? Both work and choosing the one that works for you and your nervous system will let changing be more sustainable and fun.
If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world!
Come visit me at coachingwithrachel.com
Enter my Making Midlife Magic Birthday Giveaway at makingmidlifemagic.com/giveaway
Sometimes, life is hard. And sometimes life is really hard. Our parents need us, our kids need us, our marriage feels bumpy, and we're worried about losing our job. At these times, it can be difficult to know how to help ourselves.We know it's too much, but everything on our plate is important.
In this episode I share five ways to help ourselves when things are difficult -- no need for baths or trips to the gym.
If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world!
Come visit me at coachingwithrachel.com
Enter my Making Midlife Magic Birthday Giveaway at makingmidlifemagic.com/giveaway
Most of us want to be resilient. We want to bounce back when life knocks us down. But some of the ways people talk about resilience -- as a kind of toughness -- may not work for us.
So how do we increase our ability to be resilient? In this episode, I offer four ways to practice being more flexible, adaptable and resilient -- no toughness required. Instead, we lean into new possibilities and connections, take small steps, and stop negative self-talk from stealing our success.
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What do you need to forgive yourself for?
If this question makes you catch your breath, you're not alone. Maybe you regret something big that that you can't let go of, maybe it's a number of smaller things. Maybe what you need to forgive yourself for are the things you didn't do.
This episode focuses on the habit of forgiveness. While we tend to think about forgiveness as a grand act where we let go once and for all, building a daily habit of self-forgiveness can be life changing.
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When you think about retirement, are you elated? Terrified? Do you think you can't even consider it because you'll have to work forever? Whatever your current thoughts, thinking with more intention about retirement is a gift to give yourself. Whether you're still over a decade away or are already retired, this episode will help you to create a retirement that you love.
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We all want to feel like our lives have meaning, joy, and a sense of purpose but we don't always know how to find these things. On today's episode I offer new ways of thinking about purpose -- ways that make it easier, more fun, and more possible to find our purpose.
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We often have the sense that something would make our life better -- If we meditated more, we'd be calmer; if we exercised more, we'd be healthier; if we saw our friends more, we'd be happier. But that doesn't make it easier to do those things. Judging ourselves actually makes those things harder to do.
The antidote to self-judgment is experimentation. When you see your life as an experiment, rather than a pass/fall exam, so much more becomes possible.
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Have you experienced compare & despair -- looking at someone else's life and using it to put yourself down? I certainly have. I've used other people's successes to criticize my own life and choices -- Or at least I did, until I learned the shift in this week's episode.
In this episode:
🎯 What to remind yourself when you're in compare & despair mode
🎯 Why comparison isn't always the thief of joy
🎯 How to use comparison to open up possibility
🎯 One technique to use comparison to improve your life
If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world!
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On this episode, I talk with life and career coach Kori Linn. Kori Linn is host of the Satisfied AF podcast and she came onto my show to talk about what it means to be satisfied, how we can welcome in more satisfaction and deliciousness into our lives, making goals sexy, and so much more. You don't want to miss this one!
In this episode:
🔥 How to go on a pleasure hunt to find what feels good
🔥 Why celebrating yourself gets you to your goals faster
🔥 How sexy banter self talk gets you closer to your goals
🔥 How to get things done by making them “doable and delicious”
As a special gift, Kori is offering my listeners a copy of her Satisfied AF Audit – Grab it here.
Kori Linn's Satisfied AF Audit!
Find Kori Linn at Korilinn.com and be sure to follow her Satisfied AF podcast
If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world!
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Somewhere along the line, many of us started thinking that belief was for kids. Especially in December, there's a lot of messaging that belief is for children. Maybe it's the power of Christmas movies, but in this week's podcast, I explore the power of belief for grown ups. We believe a number of myths about belief and it's time for us to let them go so we can embrace the power of belief, as the adults we are.
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The winter holidays are all about light -- which makes sense in the darkness of winter. We all want more light -- more joy, more lightness in our spirits, but sometimes it can be very challenging, especially at the holidays. When we're going through something heavy, the holidays can feel especially hard, and we can feel more alone. In this episode, I share ways to welcome in lightness, even when you're carrying something heavy. It's useful at the holidays and all year round.
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In this episode, I focus on increasing our tolerance for being human -- humans who make mistakes, are imperfect, and sometimes feel awful.
We think about tolerance as a societal value, something that helps us live peaceably in our diverse world. But self-tolerance is an important value too, one that helps us embrace our own inner diversity, our own humanity.
In this episode I address:
⭐ What is self-tolerance and how can it help?
⭐ How does self-tolerance help us and the larger world?
⭐ What are strategies for increasing our tolerance for our own imperfections?
⭐ How can I use humor to lighten the experience of being human?
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We often crave greater consistency. We want to be the kind of people who exercise regularly, meditate, who consistently make good choices. But invariably, we are consistent in some ways and entirely inconsistent in others. It's time to rethink consistently -- because the truth is, sometimes we want to be less consistent. Sometimes we wish we weren't so consistently hard on ourselves, so regularly procrastinating, and so on.
In this episode:
🎯 How consistency can be a trap
🎯 Why sometimes it's better to be less consistent
🎯 The feelings that keep us showing up
🎯 Why commitment is a stronger force than consistency
If you've ever been frustrated that you can't maintain a more consistent habit, this is the episode for you.
If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world!
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So many of us feel disconnected -- from each other, ourselves, nature, a sense of something bigger. The good news is that we have what we need to re-connect. Through every day thoughts, feelings, and actions, we can choose what we want to connect to and create that connection. If you want greater connection this holiday season and into the coming year, this is the episode for you!
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
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Are you a generous person? Generosity is a readiness to give more than is expected or required and often we think about it in terms of gifts of money or time. But it's even more powerful to tap into the power of generosity in our thinking. In this episode:
🌱 Why generosity isn't just about gifts of money & time
🌱 How thinking generously can increase our feelings of "enoughness"
🌱 How thinking generously about ourselves increases our well-being without asking us to ignore our feelings
🌱 Why spending half a graduate seminar talking about an author's acknowledgement page might not be the best use of your time (lol but also, it happened!)
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Often when we try to change our perspective about a situation, we try to turn a negative into a positive -- in effect, we try to look through rose-colored glasses, to "have a better attitude."
So much more is available to us than just "crabby mood" or "sunshine." We can put down the rose-colored glasses and try on some others -- Glasses of compassion, love, and kindness, to name just three. This is how we train ourselves to experience the world differently -- by looking at it through new glasses. In this episode:
👓 Two clarifying questions to ask yourself
👓 The difference between glasses of compassion and glasses of kindness
👓 How glasses of love help us to see ourselves in ways that often aren't accessible
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
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Help me rename the podcast -- you could win a coaching package!
Change can be hard -- in part because we're used to our current life. The feelings that create and sustain our current life feel like home. To foster change -- a new job, new independence, new partnership, new self concept -- we need to embrace unfamiliar feelings. In this episode, I give an example from my own life and that of my clients and how we realized that our scrappiness and hustle was functional and familiar -- until it wasn't. Then we had to turn up the volume on unfamiliar feelings.
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When we think about trust, we often think about trusting other people. In this episode, I focus on the importance of trusting ourselves and how to build that trust.
We chip away at our self trust every time we override what we really want -- when we need rest but make ourselves keep going, when we say yes to things we really don't want to do, when we speak to ourselves unkindly.
The good news is that trust is built through small, every day actions. In this episode I show you how.
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
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Most of the people I know are frequently overwhelmed. We're overwhelmed with things to do, with decisions, with responsibilites & obligations.
On this episode, I talk about overwhelm's less-known sibling, underwhelm. They're connected more than we realize, since overwhelm is most likely when we have too many "have to"s on our list and not enough "want to"s.
We don't think about underwhelm because it's much quieter than overwhelm, but paying attention to underwhelm as a feeling actually provides a path away from overwhelm.
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
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It's easy to forget about joy, isn't it? Especially at times of pain and sadness, it can feel wrong to think about joy. But it's at these times especially that we must hold onto our human capacity for joy -- not instead of sadness, but in addition to it.
What if I refuse to let anything steal my joy? Asking myself this question, I saw clearly how I let other people, the 24 hour news cycle, and even my own busyness steal my joy. I'm taking it back.
If this speaks to you, this is the episode for you.
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
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This week's podcast helps to answer a useful question: What feeds me? It is such a important question of self care, but often, we don't know how to answer.
It's an especially helpful question to ask during challenging times. This week has been very hard for me and for so many people I love. I hope this podcast reminds you, whenever you need reminding, that we can feed our body, mind, heart, and spirit even when life is painful, even when our efforts feel not enough.
In this episode:
❤️ The power of choosing what emotion you want to grow
❤️ "Being fed" as a form of connection
❤️ Why we have to ask "What feeds me now?" regularly
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
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This episode is about the power of radical, relentless curiosity. Often we're not curious about ourselves because we think we know our skills, preferences, and capacities. We think we know who we are.
But what if we're wrong?
Radical curiosity lets us consider our life as an experiment to find out. Maybe there are things we liked in the past but don't like now. Maybe we've thought, "I could never . . . " but find that indeed we can. Maybe we've been chasing after something we no longer even want. Each one of these paths starts with radical curiosity about ourselves.
Rather than starting with something big, as we often do ("I'm going to change myself completely!") we can start by being curious about some of the smallest things about ourselves, including even how we take our coffee. And from there, radical curiosity can open up a world of possibility.
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What can death teach us about life? In this episode, I bring together two parts of my life: My thirty years as a teacher of the Holocaust and my more recent work as a life coach. Maybe you're a doctor, hospice chaplain, or have a different career that involves the end of life, or maybe you've lost someone close to you. These painful experiences can change us and how we think about life and time in ways that can help us to embrace our full, messy, imperfect lives. Most of us don't want to think about death -- our own or that of the people we love -- but death is part of our human life. Just ask Barbie (no spoilers, I promise!).
In this episode:
🌟 Why your life matters, even if you’re no Einstein --- and how knowingthis builds self-compassion
🌟 How knowing that "life is too short" can help us get over fear -- and why we shouldn't use it topressure ourselves
🌟 How the idea of having a life purpose can trip us up and how to choose a more empowering thought
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
coachingwithrachel.com
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How do you know if you’re successful? Usually we think we’re a success when we reach our goal -- we getthe book contract, keep the business open, stay married, raise happy,well-adjusted kids.
It's a fine system when things go well and feels terrible when they don’t. This is when the concept of infinitegoodness comes to the rescue. It's a way of showing your brain that you and your efforts in this world matter.
Mentioned in this episode: The Gap and the Gain by Dan Sullivan and Dr. Benjamin Hardy
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coachingwithrachel.com
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Do you feel like an adult? If you're like me, the answer is probably: Not always. Sometimes that's a good thing -- we may feel childlike when we play -- but sometimes we use "I'm not an adult" against ourselves. We have so many internalized rules about what it means to be an adult. Adults know how to cook. Adults keep a budget. Adults don't have debt. Adults stay married. Adults know how to drive. Adults can take care of themselves. When we don't line up in these ways, we feel less adult. It feels awful.
In this episode, I show the power of expanding our thoughts about what it means to be an adult. In this episode:
🌟 The difference between biological age and the age we feel
🌟 How your thoughts about adulthood can keep you in a fixed mindset
🌟 More empowering ways to think about adult human life
"Letting the days go by . . . " Remember that song by the Talking Heads, Once in a Lifetime? It describes how we find ourselves doing things, living our lives, but wondering "How did I get here?"
That's auto-pilot. And in this episode, I offer one antidote to this kind of sleepwalking. It's a simple mindset shift that changes how we think about ourselves, which changes how we do everything.
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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There's something surprising that keeps us stuck. It keeps our brain spinning and trying to figure out the right answer, instead of moving us closer to the life we want. That thing is paradoxes, and self-growth is filled with them.
In this episode I share three contradictory truisms of self-growth and explain we can get ourselves unstuck from the web of contradiction. In this episode:
⭐ How paradoxes affect us, even if we never think about them
⭐ The 3 most common paradoxes that keep us stuck
⭐ How to get unstuck from paradoxes by using our brain and our body
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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Most of us lie to ourselves regularly -- not always knowingly, but we do. We tell ourselves we're fine when we're not; we tell ourselves we can't change when we can; we tell ourselves we're too old/too slow/too stuck to have what we want.
Having the life we want starts with telling ourselves the truth. In this episode:
🎯 Why we lie to ourselves
🎯 How to know something is a lie when it feels so true
🎯 The danger of "I am" statements and how to use them for yourself
🎯 Why a willingness to learn is the antidote to a negative self-concept
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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Your life is your art. It sounds so pretty, doesn't it? We're artists, shaping the canvas of our life. It sounds so good, but we have art wrong.
To embrace our life as art, we have to get real about art as well as about our lives. Art, like life, is full of self-doubt and failure.
In this episode, I highlight three powerful truths about art that we can use to see our lives differently. These powerful truths increase self-compassion, self-trust, and let us see the beauty in our messy, imperfect lives, as they are right now.
Take a listen and let me know what your art is! I'm at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com or dm me on social media.
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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This episode focuses on a thought I'm calling a "dead mouse" thought. You know how cats bring you dead mice as a gift, but you don't receive it as a gift? Our brain offers us thought like this. It's trying to help but it's not welcome help.
The thought is: It's my fault.
You might hear it when your spouse leaves you, or you get into a fight with your aging parent. You might hear it when your kids don't get along, or when you get a difficult diagnosis.
You might not hear, "It's my fault." You might think, "I should be more patient," "I should have taken better care of myself," or "If only I had paid attention sooner."
Our brain offers us this thought because it knows we like to feel in control and sometimes life feels very out of control. So it offers us this thought, which is not only very painful but also not helpful.
To counter this thought, we recognize our brain's desire for control and certainty, and give it more helpful thoughts that highlight our own courage and strength.
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
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IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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Have you felt NRE (new relationship energy) recently?
Whether you're single or in a long-time monogamous relationship, fostering NRE with yourself is powerful magic. While sometimes we may think we don't know who we are anymore, NRE is a reminder that meeting someone new can be fun and sexy -- even if (especially if!) that person is you.
In this episode:
➡️ The power of non-romantic NRE
➡️ NRE as an antidote to feeling bored or stuck
➡️ How to activate curiosity about yourself
➡️ How excitement and nervousness tap into NRE
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
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IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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"After a certain age, a woman becomes invisible." I remember my mom saying this when she was younger than I am now. I've heard similar things from friends and clients. Salespeople don't seem to see them, they can't get the bartender's attention. They start to wonder if maybe they're wearing an invisibility cloak.
And even when we know that we are not literally invisible, we can feel unseen. The limited roles people see us in -- worker, parent, spouse, etc --don't capture the fullness of our human experience. Sometimes we stop seeing ourselves. If our roles change, we may not recognize ourselves.
The antidote to this is to embrace our own humanness by increasing our tolerance for complexity, difficulty, mistakes and all the feelings that come along with them. They're like a membership fee for the human club.
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
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IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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So many people I love are feeling depleted right now. At these times, it can be challenging to know how to fill your tank.
In this episode, I offer three thoughts that make exhaustion worse, and how to counter them. I explain why we may want to stop talking about filling our tank and instead focus on where we can go with $5 of gas.
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
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IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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For this episode, I clicked the "explicit" button so I can swear. It's worth it to tell you this:
Sometimes your brain is an a**hole.
Realizing this has changed so much for me, so I have to share.
In this episode:
🎯 Why your brain can be an a**hole -- and why it's not a problem
🎯 How to use everything you've learned from toddlers to manage your mind
🎯 How to know whether your a**hole brain has the wheel, or whether your adult brain is driving the car
🎯 How embracing your jerk brain actually leads to greater self-compassion and love
Knowing when to listen to sh*t your brain says and when to ignore it is the superpower that lets you feel more in control and intentional about your life.
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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Do you sometimes want to get away from all of it, ditch your obligations and go back to a simpler time?
I do. Even though I love being a mom, spouse, coach, teacher, and friend sometimes I want to remember who I am outside of these roles.
If this speaks to you, you may want to rewild your life. The idea of rewilding comes from ecology -- removing human influences over a land and reintroducing native species of plants and animals. We're not going paleo and you don't need to eat nuts & berries (unless you want to), but finding ways to feed your inner nature will let you live a more authentic, satisfying life.
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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If you're curious about whether coaching is a good fit for you, sign up for a consultation
There are so many negative messages about getting older that it’s no surprise so many of us often feel bad about it. If you’re not convinced, go to the drugstore for a greeting card for someone over 50. You'll find lots of pictures of gravestones and sagging body parts. Is it any wonder we often feel so negative about aging?
So it's not surprising that we often live as if there's an alternative to getting older, as if we might be able to bypass this human experience and keep our wisdom but stay 30 forever.
The antidote to all this comes with one simple truth: Getting older is literally the best. Accepting this core reality makes so much possible.
In this episode:
🎯 Why seeing getting old as a "necessary evil" feels terrible
🎯 How accepting the reality of aging helps us to move forward
🎯 How a trip to the emotions buffet lets us see all the feelings we could have about getting older
🎯 Why wrinkles and gray hair are the best (but you can still dye your hair if you prefer it that way)
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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We've all heard of the bucket list -- the list of things you want to do or see before you die.
In this episode, I share my concept of the anti-bucket list. While the bucket list comes from the idea that life is short and experiences shouldn't be delayed, the anti-bucket list comes from the idea that we may live longer than we expect to. The anti-bucket list is filled with activities you would start if you knew that you'd live to 100.
Both the bucket list and the anti-bucket list have a part to play in shaping a meaningful and enjoyable life after 50.
In my life, the lessons of each list come from two of my grandfathers -- Grandpa Charlie who knew his childhood rheumatic fever might kill him and died at 50 and Grandpa Nat, who lived to 90 and never expected to.
In this episode:
➡️ Why our brains love the idea of the bucket list (hello, dopamine!)
➡️ Why we don't imagine living to 100
➡️ How envisioning another 3 or 4 decades of life changes how we think about our plans
➡️ The power of the 100 year plan, even if you don't see your 100th birthday
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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In this episode, I dive into the midlife crisis. Whether you're not there yet, in the middle of one, or well on the other side, this episode offers tools that will be useful. Because the midlife crisis is all about our relationship to time.
A midlife crisis can feel unbearable. Or, more to the point, sometimes in midlife, life feels unbearable. It's unbearable that some things haven't changed -- we feel stagnant, unfulfilled -- and that other things have changed that we wish hadn't -- we might lose our job, our marriage, or our parents. We often think the answer is to change our life, so we can stop having these feelings. But often, on the other side of those changes, we don't feel better.
The answer, surprisingly, is to embrace the midlife crisis as a turning point. In this episode, I share how to have a more useful midlife crisis. If you want to burn down parts of your life, you absolutely can -- but do it as a controlled burn, with intention, rather than reactively. The difference will change not only your midlife crisis, but your relationship to what comes next.In this episode: Two key thoughts that fuel the midlife crisis Why some people blow up their lives at midlife The switch that unlocks the power of the midlife crisis How the midlife crisis can help you enjoy the second half of your life, even though it feels terrible
In this episode:
🌟 Two key thoughts that fuel the midlife crisis
🌟 Why some people blow up their lives at midlife
🌟 The switch that unlocks the power of the midlife crisis
🌟 How the midlife crisis can help you enjoy the second half of your life, even though it feels terrible
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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In this episode, I talk about the importance of holding space for yourself, and offer specific strategies to help you do it. This episode will be especially useful when you’re feeling overwhelmed by your emotions, or when you're feeling on the threshold of some change but aren't there yet. Holding space lets you hold open a door even while you're figuring out how to walk through.
We often hear about holding space as something we do for others, but we can hold space for ourselves. When you want someone to let you have your feelings without trying to fix them, it's good to know that you can offer this gift to yourself.
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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If you're curious about whether coaching is a good fit for you, sign up for a consultation
This episode highlights four key tools from my first 52 episodes. Sure, you could just listen to all 52 episodes starting with episode #1, but this tool bag is going to get you there much faster! And I'll tell you which episodes to listen to if you want to learn more.
These tools are the foundation of a powerful self-coaching practice. They'll help you open up new possibilities, so you can feel good about yourself, your life, and your future.
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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In today's episode, I share a metaphor that will help you see possibilities. It will help when you feel stuck, or when you're in an emotional rut. It's easy for the brain to understand and lets us see choices where previously we saw none. Plus, it's fun!
What is this magical metaphor? The buffet! In today's episode, I share the power of imagining a buffet of feelings where you get to decide what to put on your plate and how much to take.
The emotional buffet lets us see what's on our plate and also what we might want to add. Rather than trying to convince yourself to feel differently, the buffet gently offers new feelings and possibilities.
In this episode:
🌟 Why the buffet is such a powerful way of thinking about choice
🌟 How to decide what to put on your plate -- no moralizing required!
🌟 Why trying to feel better about a situation often doesn't work, and why adding emotions at the buffet does
🌟 The things you should never put on your plate, even though you notice them at the buffet
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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This episode is for you if you sometimes judge yourself, if you secretly believe you'd be better if you were different, if you find yourself wanting to be more like that person over there -- in other words, if you're human. A permission slip from the universe will help you to let go of these thoughts.
I recently received mine -- and now I want to make sure you get yours too!
In this episode, I share how my permission slip came in the form of some "super woo" I first rolled my eyes at -- but how it ended up showing me the utter perfection of how I am in the world. You too! You don't have to go down the rabbit hole of woo with me, either. I offer three questions to help you write your own permission slip to be beautifully, extravagantly, magnificently YOU.
In this episode:
🌟 Why we often value things that are hard over things that come easily to us
🌟 Why we distrust our innate way of working and being in the world
🌟 How a permission slip from the universe quiets self-doubt
🌟 Three questions to ask to create your own permission slip and sign it
🌟 If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world! 🌟
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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Elana Kahn had over 20 years of important jobs with impressive titles. She had been Editor of the Wisconsin Jewish Chronicle, Director of Milwaukee's Jewish Community Relations Council, and Associate Dean for Outreach at Spertus Institute for Jewish Learning and Leadership in Chicago. And then she decided, at the age of 55, to give herself a midlife sabbatical.
She left her job and decided to do less. She developed a different relationship with time and with herself. She painted and learned to throw pots on the wheel. She listened more closely to herself and others. At first she thought she should plan her sabbatical, but in the end, she decided to trust herself and the process. The results have been transformational in ways that we can learn from, even if we have no plans to leave our job.
Listen to this episode -- the first interview on Making Midlife Magic -- to discover:
🌟 How to take a sabbatical even if you can’t leave your job
🌟 Why productivity chips away at our self-trust and how doing less builds it
🌟 How to make your lunch hour a mini-sabbatical
🌟 Why the sabbatical may be especially important for middle-aged women
And so much more! This episode is filled with insights you'll continue thinking about long after the podcast ends.
Whether you want to step away from your job for awhile or just take a break while keeping your job, this episode offers so much. Enjoy!
You can find Elana Kahn's writing at Elanakahn.com.
If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world!
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
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Do you sometimes feel like an imposter?
I do. I've felt like an imposter scholar, coach, mom, adult.
Usually this happens when I'm having feelings I think a “real” scholar, coach, mom, adult wouldn’t have.
Usually we try to banish the feelings. We practice telling ourselves that we’re great. But the feelings often refuse to leave. So we feel like imposters.
In this episode, I offer another way. Rather than trying to kick the imposter feelings out of the club, we’ll change the rules of the club.
In this episode:
🌟 Why feeling like an imposter doesn’t mean you have imposter syndrome
🌟 Why trying to overcome self doubt often doesn’t work
🌟 Why self-doubt is often a sign you’re doing something new and brave
🌟 How to experience self-doubt without believing it
If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world ❤️
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
To receive my weekly emails, filled with useful mind shifts to help you create a life you look forward to living, sign up here.
This episode is for you if you're human.
I share a way to increase self-compassion, recover from setbacks more quickly, all while intentionally inviting self-growth.
All it takes is a small shift in your thinking.
In this episode, I talk about what it means to practice and explain how practicing getting older shifts our experience of being human.
In this episode:
🌟 How we get stuck thinking of ourselves in certain ways (the black t-shirt problem) and how practicing gets us unstuck
🌟 Why practice is an antidote to perfectionism (hint: practice does not make perfect!)
🌟 Why even accomplished musicians practice and what we can learn from Yo Yo Ma's attitude to practicing
🌟 How practicing lets you practice being your future self -- whether the self of 5 years from now, 1 year from now, or 1 day from now
Take a listen and let me know what you think!
If you enjoy the podcast, I'd love to have you in more of my world ❤️
Website: coachingwithrachel.com
FB: facebook.com/rachelbaumcoaching
IG: @rachelbaumcoaching
To sign up for my weekly emails, filled with useful mind shifts and joyful ways of engaging with the world, sign up here.
Did you know that your emotions are magnetic? Some emotions push us away and some emotions draw us closer. In today's episode I share how turning the magnet around can make all the difference. In this episode:
🌟 Why push emotions like unhappiness are often easier to access than pull emotions like desire
🌟 Why the pull emotions often feel harder and further away
🌟 How to use the push emotions to access the pull emotions
🌟 Why even just a few minutes in a pull emotion can powerfully shift your energy
If you want to invite change and possibility into your life, this is one tool that will surely help!
If you feel pulled towards new possibilities in your own life, you definitely want to enter my 2023 giveaway! I'm giving away one free coaching session every month. No strings, no stress, just one hour with me to help you move forward in whatever way you want to. Enter at pages.coachingwithrachel.com/giveaway. And if you just want more mindset shifts to try on your own, be sure to get on my email list. I send one email a week, on Saturdays, and with an open rate of over 80% I can promise you that people enjoy them. Give them a try and if it's not for you, you can easily unsubscribe with my blessing. Click here to sign up.
What person over 40 doesn't sometimes feel regret? We often imagine that if only we had made a different decision in the past, our present life would be different. We'd be happier, healthier, less lonely, more fulfilled.
Regret is judging our past selves for not knowing what our current self does. It feels awful but it's not necessarily a problem. The trick is using it for ourselves instead of against ourselves. In this episode I explain:
⭐ Why it matters that regret is a form of sadness
⭐ How to partner with your past self to learn from the past
⭐ Why taking action in the present is such a powerful antidote to regret
⭐ How to make your future more regret-proof
If you feel mired in regret about the past, this episode offers a way out. And if you're not feeling the pain of regret, this episode offers a way to make your life more regret-proof.
In this episode I share pure coaching magic -- three of my favorite coaching questions. I use these not only in sessions with my clients but on my own brain, and I encourage you to use them to be your own life coach. These are questions you can journal about, talk about with a friend, ponder on your walk, or contemplate in the bath. And they aren’t just think-y questions either – we’re going to bring our full selves, including our body, to these questions. .
Different answers start with different questions and these are so good.
These questions will let you be your own life coach but if you want to turbocharge changes in your life, sign up for one-on-one coaching with me. Sign up to meet with me here, so we can discuss how coaching can help you have the life you want.
We often think about ourselves like jigsaw puzzles missing some pieces. Sometimes we even look at other people's puzzles and wish we had their pieces. We want to be calm, centered, organized, strong, joyful . . . The list changes, but we all have something, and usually more than one thing.
Sometimes we think that we can get those things by reading a book, going on a retreat, taking a course. And they can help, but what will help most is first seeing that you have the qualities you are seeking.
We are not jigsaw puzzles after all.
Listen to find out what it means that you are always already whole and why the garden store might be more useful to us than the puzzle store. The concept of "always already" comes from philosophy but you don't need to go back to class to understand this in your core. And when you truly get it, it makes so much possible.
Go to coachingwithrachel.com to sign up for my weekly emails, filled with fun & useful mindset shifts. They are always already delightful!
This episode focuses on one swap that makes so many things easier. Seriously.
This is for you if
- You’re ever down on yourself (hello, human!)
- If you’ve been trying to start a habit and just can’t seem to make progress on it
- Or if you’ve been trying to end a habit and find that you keep doing it
This is for you if you’ve ever asked, Why can’t I change? Or, Why is change so hard?
And honestly, I could go on. This swap will help you be better at the things you want to do – whether you want to be better at work, as a parent, or as a partner. It's a core update for the Operating System of YOU.
Take 15 minutes to listen, and then practice this swap every day. I promise it will make your life better.
A few months ago, I got hurt during exercise, and I've been regaining my strength with Pilates. I've learned a lot, and see connections between what I'm learning here and what I've learned about my brain. So on today's episode, we're taking our brains to Pilates class. I'll share four key takeaways that are true in Pilates and true in life, so we can strengthen our foundation in both.
On this episode:
🌟 Why we're often wrong about what's wrong
🌟 How isolating the facts helps us to see our story
🌟 Why slouching every day or having unhelpful thoughts is not a problem
🌟 How habits help us to know ourselves
I'm helped in this episode by the wonderful owner of Jessica Fudim Pilates. She's so talented and truly such a compassionate, loving person to learn from (and over Zoom!). You can find her at jessicafudimpilates.com.
If you want to create a life you love, I can help you look to the future and clear away whatever is standing in your way. Email me at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com or come visit me at coachingwithrachel.com to learn more.
We often think of confidence as our prize for accomplishing things. We think we'll feel confident when we lose weight, make more money, win that award. But often we feel a lack of self-confidence despite our weight loss, financial success, and awards.
To increase our feeling of confidence, we have to look inward. Because here's the thing: Confidence is just thoughts we have about ourselves. Things we believe to be true. And we can choose them intentionally. On today's episode:
🌟 How to let go of confidence-busting beliefs
🌟 Why we can hold some positive beliefs about ourselves (I'm smart, I'm a hard worker, etc) and still not be as confident as we want to be
🌟 Two different kinds of confidence and why the difference matters
🌟 How to generate feelings of self-confidence
Find more of my work at coachingwithrachel.com
This episode is a love note for the stuck. It’s for when you don’t know what to do, when you want a change but don’t believe it’s possible.
Sometimes getting older can make us feel more stuck.
Sometimes we don’t like our job but feel stuck because the money is good; or we have a job we love but feel stuck because the money isn’t good; or maybe we aren’t happy in our marriage, but feel stuck because have we have children at home; or we’re happy in our marriage but feel stuck because the thrill is gone.
Sometimes we feel like the time for us to share our gifts with the world is passing, and we feel stuck because we haven’t found “our thing”.
In this episode, I offer four parts to getting unstuck. Learn
⭐ How feeling stuck is different from being stuck
⭐ Why stuck feels so terrible, by turning us against our previous selves
⭐ How owning our own stories moves us out of stuckness
⭐ How a 1% action can change everything
Coaching is one of the best ways I know to get unstuck. To sign up for a complimentary no strings hour-long session, go to coachingwithrachel.com
I’ve spent much of my life as an emotional eater. Growing up, there were a lot of feelings I didn’t know what to do with and I learned to self-comfort with food. And as I got older, the connection between food & emotions remained. I developed more emotional resilience, I learned to love exercise and broccoli, but the association between feelings and food created a strong neural pathway for me that still comes out in times of stress.
You might be an emotional eater, or you might want to drink less or to be more intentional about the time you spend on Facebook. Today's episode will help with all these things.
In today's episode
🌟 Why trying to stop wanting sweets or wine sets us up to fail
🌟 How judging ourselves stops us from being curious about our behavior
🌟 How to unwind a habit by planning ahead of time
🌟 How to trust yourself around food and alcohol
All this plus a reference to The Producers -- Take a listen and let me know what you think!
If you enjoy the podcast, be sure to sign up for my weekly newsletter. It's delivered on Saturday and offers more mindset shifts to live with joy & intention. Go to lovenotes.coachingwithrachel.com to sign up or click here.
Some days, it's all too much. I know -- two weeks ago, I spent a Saturday under the covers. In this episode I share what I learned and what might help when it's all too much. I explain:
➡️ Why "it's too much" is both a thought and a fact
➡️ Why it isn't helpful to think "it's just thoughts"
➡️ How self-comfort and self-trust are the dynamic duo when it's all too much
➡️ How being specific when our brains think "it's too much" creates a path away from misery
All this, plus a reference to Monty Python and the Holy Grail -- Take a listen.
If you think it's all too much, coaching can help -- Go to coachingwithrachel.com to sign up for a complimentary session.
"Should I stay or should I go?"
Remember that song by The Clash? If only The Clash had this episode! We often think of decisions like life's shell game -- choose a shell, life spins it around, and then, at some point in the future, we see if we won.
This idea that a decision is good or bad based on how it turns out causes us a lot of pain – because it means we only get to evaluate our decision in the future. And even then, we only get to see the future that we picked. We don’t actually get to see how the other choice would have worked out – We never get to stay AND go – although sometimes our brains tell us that the other choice would have led to greater happiness.
In this episode, I offer a more powerful way to make decisions -- one that doesn't rely on choosing the right shell.
I'm giving away one hour long coaching session on the 15th of every month of 2023. To enter and have a chance to win next week, go to pages.coachingwithrachel.com/giveaway. Open to everyone, including former & current clients.
In today's episode, we learn from polyamory. Even if polyamorous romance isn't your thing, polyamorous thinking is so helpful.
This episode is for you if there are parts of your life that feel in conflict. Maybe you don’t know how to balance work life and home life. Maybe your head and your heart don’t get along. Maybe you think your love of creating art conflicts with your desire to make money.
What will help these situations is something I call polyamorous thinking and it’s the result of a breakthrough I had about my own life.
Take a listen and let me know what you think.
Note: In the episode I say that Bowie the retriever dog mind shows up in episode 6 -- I was wrong, it's actually episode 2. Sorry! (but episode 6 is great)
I'm giving away one hour-long coaching session every month of 2023! Enter at pages.coachingwithrachel.com/giveaway
Sometimes we start to dream, to imagine ourselves and our lives bigger than ever before. And then a voice in our head says, Who do you think you are?
This voice says, Stay in your lane. People like you can't do that. Don't think about doing that at your age.
We start to question ourselves, to think that we have dreamed too big. We make ourselves or our dreams smaller. We stay unhappy and unfulfilled.
Instead, we need to answer the question Who do you think you are? in ways that magnify our shine.
In this episode,
🌟 What it means to shine and how it's different from being great
🌟 Why shining is worth it, even if you don't succeed
🌟 How shining brightly helps others as well as yourself
🌟 How to answer the question, Who do you think you are?
I'm giving away a one-hour coaching session every month of 2023! Enter at pages.coachingwithrachel.com/giveaway. No stress, no sales, just a one-hour conversation to help you get clarity on any issue.
What does it mean to rest? Too often, our ideas of rest come from advertisements, which tell us that rest for women = baths and rest for men = drinking or napping.
If you enjoy these things and find them restful, go for it. But for many of us, rest is more complicated. Watching TV or taking a bath either doesn't make us feel rested, or doesn't make us feel rested for long.
We think that rest is what we get when we stop working, but here too, it's not so simple. After work, we have different work (family, volunteering, paying bills), which makes it even harder to figure out what exactly "rest" is and how to get it.
In this episode, I offer a different way to think about rest, one that disentangles it from work entirely. Learn:
⭐ Why we often don't feel rested, even in the bath
⭐ How to experience more rest at the end of the day
⭐ Why soul-feeding projects can actually help you to feel more rested
⭐ How rest is a collaboration between your body & your mind
I'm giving away one hour-long coaching session every month of 2023. No stress, no sales, just an hour session over Zoom to give you more clarity on a situation or decision. Enter at pages.coachingwithrachel.com/giveaway. Open to everyone, including former and current clients. Signing up once enters you in the giveaway for the year. Take a chance on yourself and enter!
Do you spend your time in pursuit of happiness? Most of us do. We try to organize our lives to maximize happiness, which makes sense -- but it means that when we are sad, frustrated, disappointed, or angry we can feel like we've failed. We often see those feelings as something we need to fix so we can return to happiness. And this can get intensified as we get older, because we think that by our age, we should have figured some of this stuff out already and should be happier more of the time.
But what if that's not the point of life? What if the human experience is always going to be a mix of emotions, and none of them need fixing?
This is the powerful concept I share in this episode -- the idea that life is always going to be 50/50. It has helped me to find greater equilibrium and calm through the ups & downs of life and has also helped me to get greater clarity on my decisions. Really -- it's that powerful of a concept. Take a listen and let me know what you think!
If you have a midlife issue that you'd love to hear me talk about, drop me a note at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com. I might just record a podcast for you!
Today's episode is about celebrating your wins. We often think of celebration as the reward for our hard work -- and it can be -- but in this episode I offer a different way of thinking about celebration. Rather than reward, I offer that celebration is a way of seeing ourselves, and that practicing it every day lets us experience ourselves and our life differently.
In this episode I share the simple habit that will
🌟 let you slow down before moving onto the next goal
🌟 allow you to focus on how far you've come rather than how far you have to go
🌟 remind yourself what a good job you're doing of being human (it isn't always easy)
Try it for a few weeks and let me know how it goes!
I'm giving away a free coaching session every month of 2023! To enter, go to pages.coachingwithrachel.com/giveaway. Signing up once enters you for the whole year. No stress, no strings -- Just an hour-long conversation over Zoom to bring increased clarity to any issue.
In this episode, I offer a different way to think about goal-setting, just in time for the new year. I explain why goal-setting is so powerful and why we so often do it wrong. I share a better way to think about goals, and explain why you may want to give up resolutions forever, if you haven’t already.
In this episode:
🌟 Why so many middle-aged people give up on goals (hint: resolutions don't work)
🌟 Why January 1 is a trap
🌟 How to think about goals in a way that works for you instead of against you
🌟 How to get closer to your goals by giving yourself the reward in advance
Whatever you want to create in 2023, this episode will get you closer. ❤️
I'm giving away a free coaching session every month of 2023! To enter, go to pages.coachingwithrachel.com/giveaway. Signing up once enters you for the whole year. No stress, no strings -- Just an hour-long conversation over Zoom, sure to bring increased clarity to whatever issue you bring.
We’re in the December holiday season -- prime belief season.
It sounds so ethereal, doesn’t it? Belief. Faith. Maybe the stuff of children. Good for holiday movies but not for actually getting things done.
In truth, belief is a powerful gift you can give the people you love, especially when they're struggling.
In this episode I explain
🌟 What it really means to believe in someone (it's simpler than we think)
🌟 How believing in someone is useful (belief changes lives)
🌟 How to powerfully practice believing (it's more like building a muscle than we realize)
I’m going to start with your kids – and I’ll explain why – but even if you don’t have kids, you want to listen to this episode. I use kids as the example to explain how to believe in anyone -- including yourself.
I'm giving away one hour of coaching every month of 2023! Can you believe it? To enter, go to pages.coachingwithrachel.com/giveaway.
Ambivalence is not a problem -- having conflicting thoughts and feelings is just part of being human. But ambivalence feels like a problem because we expect our emotions to be our north star. We think that we’ll know what to do when we feel happy about one choice, or unhappy about the other choice. We want the clarity that comes from a single emotion. And of course you get to decide when waiting for emotional clarity is the right choice.
But feeling ambivalent is not a problem if you remember this power sentence: I get to decide who drives the clown car.
In this episode, I explore:
🌟 Why ambivalence is not a problem
🌟 How to decide which feeling to listen to
🌟 How to embrace all your feelings without letting them make the decisions
Find all the episodes of Making Midlife Magic along with other delightful content at www.coachingwithrachel.com
I send out a delicious bonbon of new perspective, metaphor, and story every Saturday morning. You'll find them at lovenotes.coachingwithrachel.com -- if you love them, sign up to get your own.
Here's something useful for your holiday tool kit -- Boundaries! There are a lot of expectations over the holidays. People have expectations for us, we have expectations for others, and trying to keep everyone happy can be a challenge.
Enter -- boundaries. Boundaries let you know what's yours and not yours to take care of. They also let you create rules, so you'll know what to do when Uncle Moe starts talking politics at the dinner table.
In this week's episode
🌟 Why boundaries are a gift you give yourself
🌟 The roles and rules of boundary-setting
🌟 One thought error that makes setting boundaries challenging and how to fix it
If you find this podcast useful, please share it with friends -- thank you!
Holiday celebrations sometimes mean coming face-to-face with people who judge us -- people who think we're flaky, financially irresponsible, not successful enough -- or, you know, too uptight, frugal, and focused on work. There's no shortage of other people's thoughts about us!
It feels bad to be criticized. Often we try to get out of that bad feeling by changing the other person’s mind, by proving that they're wrong about us.
I want to offer a better way. It’s a powerful mindset shift that has helped me immensely.
Instead of convincing them, or agreeing with them you just -- let them be wrong about you.
In this episode, I explain the power of this thought and also how to not make ourselves wrong.
I offer the dynamic duo of thoughts that will help you get through the holidays with calm & confidence, even if you're seated next to judgey Aunt Matilda.
If you want 2023 to be filled with more confidence, optimism, and calm, give yourself the gift of one-on-one coaching. Go to coachingwithrachel.com to sign up for a free one-hour session. It's my gift to you.
There are many good reasons to be grateful. Even during challenging times, we often appreciate our friends, family, home, food, and more.
Why, then, can it be so challenging to feel grateful?
Sometimes knowing all the good reasons we have to be grateful doesn't mean that we feel grateful.
In this episode I explain:
➡️ Why knowing how lucky we are doesn't always make us grateful
➡️ How trying to foster gratitude can backfire
➡️ How to be grateful even if you don't like parts of the gift
➡️ How to feel thankful rather than guilty about your good fortune
I'd be grateful if you'd subscribe, leave a review, and/or share this podcast with friends, so I can reach more people with Making Midlife Magic. The truth is -- it's useful wisdom even if you're not middle aged! Friends can also follow me on social media, or sign up for my delightful weekly love notes.
Do you have dreams but think they're not realistic? Maybe you decide to make them more realistic. Instead of dreaming of travel to far-away places, you decide to dream of nearby places. Maybe instead of a big, scary, impossible goal, you decide to pick something you can achieve more easily.
This episode is for you.
The truth is, you have no idea what is realistic. I don't know either, and in this episode I'll explain why. I'll offer you a better question to ask instead of "Is this realistic?" and explain why our brains get this question wrong so often.
If you want to make your dreams a reality, one-on-one coaching is the best gift you can give yourself. In eight weeks, you can change your life! Visit www.coachingwithrachel.com to sign up for a complimentary session.
For today's special birthday edition of the podcast -- three bones of wisdom from Wally, my dog. I don't actually want to switch places with my dog, but I've learned a lot from Wally and the other dogs I've loved. In today's podcast, what Wally teaches me about my animal body and love.
Snuggle up with your dog or any other creature you love, and have a listen.
If you aren't getting my weekly love notes, do yourself a favor and sign up at lovenotes.coachingwithrachel.com. It's not just another email -- it's a little bonbon of a good idea, wrapped in joy and an upbeat dance track.
How do you think of the relationship between your mind and your body? Are they friends? Warring spouses? Neighbors who never talk? If you have chronic pain, you might feel like your body has betrayed you.
Thoughts like these compound the physical pain with emotional pain.
In this episode, we look at how to have a better relationship with your body. I hope this episode is useful to listeners with chronic pain – and everyone else with a human body. Creating a partnership between your mind and your body is the first step to giving your body full voting rights.
If you enjoy the podcast, be sure to sign up for my mailing list at lovenotes.coachingwithrachel.com.
Do you think life coaching isn't for you because you don't feel drawn to all this talk about believing? Are you a cynic, a skeptic, or some other variety of non-believer?
If so, this is the episode for you.
In today's episode, I offer life coaching for cynics and skeptics. Your doubt is not only not a problem -- it's a superpower! In this episode, I'll explain why and will give you three key takeaways that will let you use your doubt for yourself instead of against yourself.
Take a listen and let me know what you think!
And if you're a cynic or a skeptic in search of a life coach, fill out this form to sign up for a free session, so you can see for yourself if coaching is right for you.
For all my episodes and to learn more about me, check out my website at coachingwithrachel.com
In last week's episode we traveled to the future and in today's episode, we travel to the past. Too often we travel to the past to bring back self-doubt and regret, and throw our previous self under the bus. In today's episode, I offer a different way to think about decisions you've made in the past and share how to have compassion for your previous self.
If you want to partner with all the versions of yourself, one-on-one coaching is a gift you want to give your present and future self! Go to coachingwithrachel.com or tell me about yourself here.
In this episode we go to the future to get advice from a different version of ourselves. We'll get wisdom from Back to the Future -- not from Marty or Doc but from the mayor of Hill Valley, Goldie Wilson. Being in relationship with our future self changes our relationship to the present and can help us decide what to do next.
Take a listen and give a gift to present you.
For a complimentary one-hour coaching session, fill out my form here. To see my past, present, and future podcasts as well as weekly love notes -- bite-sized bursts of useful joy! -- subscribe to my mailing list.
And to see all my offerings or to read a transcript of this episode, visit coachingwithrachel.com.
In today's practical magic, how to take all the things you want to do and get them out of your head and into your calendar -- in a way that actually works. To do this, create a list that starts with remembering who you are, how you work best, and what you need. From this, you can create a do-able list that actually lets you have a loving relationship with yourself and with all the activities of your life. Take a listen and let me know what you think (rachel@coachingwithrachel.com)!
Episode with full transcript is on my website, coachingwithrachel.com. Sign up to receive a weekly dose of joy and practical magic at lovenotes.coachingwithrachel.com.
In today's episode, how to have a new relationship with your to do list. Most of us have a love/hate relationship with our list. We feel good when we cross things off our list, but terrible about all of the things still on the list. The list becomes a metric that we use for how well we use our time. Today's episode changes all that by showing new ways to think about the list. Listen to the episode and hear what the list is trying to tell you.
Get the complete transcript of the episode here
If you're curious about what coaching can do for you, now is a great time to sign up for a complimentary session. Fill out my form here or send me a note at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com
What were your best decisions? What were the emotions you used to fuel those decisions? In today's episode, we take a trip to the past in order to shape our future, by writing the biography of our emotions. I'll offer you three powerful questions to start you on your way.
To get the questions as a download, along with an emotional wheel and a link to additional questions, go to workbook.coachingwithrachel.com/prompts
When we tell the story of our life, we usually start with events -- graduations, weddings, births, jobs, travel.
But what are the feelings that fueled those experiences?
Telling your life story through the lens of your emotions powerfully offers a new way to make decisions about your future.
Take a listen and let me know what you think at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com. And come back next week for practical magic on how to figure out your emotions' biography.
I'd love to stay in touch! Take a look at my love notes at lovenotes.coachingwithrachel.com and if you enjoy them, sign up for my mailing list!
Our ride or die friend wants there to be more of us in the world. So if we want to be our own ride or die -- if we want to have our own back -- we need to make it easier to put more of ourselves into the world. This episode will tell you how to do just that, by creating more safety for yourself. We'll visit the ALPS and come back with practical magic to be Lacey to our own Cagney, Holmes to our Watson, Benson to our Stabler. You get the idea.
I'd love to be in touch with you to share new offerings and to send you my Saturday morning love note -- it's a great way to start the weekend! Sign up at lovenotes.coachingwithrachel.com.
Your ride or die is a friend who always stands with you. Someone who celebrates you in the good times and comforts you when things turn bad. A friend who always has your back, whether you’ve been betrayed by another person or by life itself.
But often, we're not this way with ourselves. When things go wrong, we judge ourselves rather than supporting ourselves.
In this episode, I'll share two core beliefs of ride or die friends and how we can use them to be our own ride or dies.
The ability to be your own ride or die is life-changing. You'll want to listen to this one more than once, and to come back for next week's practical magic, when I'll share useful ways to have your own back.
One way to have your own back is to surround yourself with people who believe in you -- like me! Sign up to receive my weekly email, a burst of joy and love in your inbox.
If you have thoughts about yourself or your life that don't make you feel good, you may want to break up with those thoughts. Maybe you've even found some new thoughts but find the old thoughts just keep coming around. You might be wondering, How do I get the new thoughts to stick?
This episode has the answer for you. You have to date your new thoughts! Spend time with them. Show them some love. Breaking up with your old thoughts is easier when you have some new thoughts that make your heart sing. In this episode, I'll show you what to do.
If you enjoy the podcast, make sure you're receiving my weekly love note -- a bite-sized taste of joy to start your weekend. Sign up here to get one tomorrow!
Do you ever look in the mirror and have thoughts about your face? Do you think your gray hair makes you look old or wish your skin was firmer? Or perhaps you, like the writer Nora Ephron, feel bad about your neck? If so, this is the episode for you! I'll show you a special pair of glasses you can wear to neutralize those negative thoughts and I'll share one of my very favorite questions that you can tuck into your bag next to the lip balm. Unlike those cough drops you put in there two years ago, this is something you can use every day, I promise.
If you're not receiving my love notes, you're missing out on a weekly dose of joy & inspiration! Sign up at lovenotes.coachingwithrachel.com.
Making Midlife Magic is now weekly! Every other week I'll have episodes that offer tools to bring the ideas of the podcast into your daily life. I'm calling these episodes Practical Magic and they may be a little shorter than my usual episodes.
This week I share how to feel a feeling. I'll show you a technique I call SNAP that will help you to approach your feelings with curiosity and love.
For more practical magic, subscribe to my love notes at lovenotes.coachingwithrachel.com . Reading these weekly is a great way to stay in the magic!
Failure feels like %$#%, so it's no surprise that we try to avoid it. But if we want to experience new things -- especially extraordinary things -- we need to embrace failure. If we're willing to fail -- to feel the feeling and to keep going -- we become unstoppable.
In this episode, learn how to fail better (no hiding under the covers required).
To check out my love notes and sign up to receive your own, go to lovenotes.coachingwithrachel.com. And if you want the recipe I used to make my first (chocolate) macarons, drop me a note at rachel@coachingwithrachel.com.
What are you willing to experience in order to have the life of your dreams? In this episode, we look at the importance of being willing to feel all the feelings -- especially the uncomfortable ones. Along the way, we ride an imaginary roller coaster, take a plane trip, and consider whether we prefer loud Musak or smelly sardines.
Come visit me at www.coachingwithrachel.com to learn more about me and to sign up for a complimentary mini-session over Zoom. Am I the perfect coach for you? Come meet me and find out.
After Roe v. Wade was overturned, a friend texted me, filled with despair about the future. This episode is for her -- and for you and for all of us who are feeling hopeless right now. In it, I draw on my 25 years of experience as a Holocaust scholar and educator to reflect on hope and why we might want to stop looking for reasons to feel hopeful and instead focus on believing in ourselves. I share two examples of resistance from the Warsaw Ghetto to explore what they show us about hope and heroism.
Our minds can be very dramatic -- often telling us scary stories, interpreting the facts in the worst possible way, and making us feel worse. In this episode, I share a tool that will help you to see your brain more clearly so you can decide how much you want to believe its stories. I invite Morgan Freeman and Oprah Winfrey (in my imagination at least!) along to help.
What do you think about the woo -- about intuition, oracle cards, astrology? If you don't regularly think about these things, this episode is for you! And if you love the woo, this episode is also for you. It's all about the importance of belief agility, which might be even more important than physical or mental agility. Have a listen and let me know what you think!
If you want to go from midlife crisis to midlife magic, be sure to grab my workbook, Three Questions to Create a Life You Love after 50 at workbook.coachingwithrachel.com. It's my gift to you!
Age is just a number! Except sometimes it's not just a number. To find out whether age is just a number we take a trip to an 18th century rabbi who carries a slip of paper in each of his pockets.
I've got a gift for you! Get my workbook -- 3 Questions to Create a Life You Love After 50 -- by signing up at workbook.coachingwithrachel.com!
Do you think of yourself as a fine wine, getting better each year, or do you feel like an overripe fruit, withering on the vine? This episode looks at the power of metaphors to shape how we think about our lives. Listen to learn a foolproof way to determine if your words are secret agents working stealthily for you, or double agents, secretly sabotaging you. This episode is a treasure chest -- you'll want to listen more than once!
My client Sue turned 50 and hadn't yet achieved the career of her dreams. She asked, "Isn't the key to happiness to be happy with what you have? Shouldn't I just accept that this dream is never going to happen?"
This episode addresses that question and the answer may surprise you. If you've ever wondered when it's time to let go of a dream, this episode is for you.
Leave it to an academic to find the magic in looking for evidence! But really, looking for evidence to support new beliefs about yourself truly does create magic. Along the way we talk about David Bowie and send him out to look for treasure.
If you are over 40 and want to feel excitement and possibility about your life, this is the podcast for you! In each episode, I'll share magic to help you create passion for the future and a life that truly delights you. In my first episode I focus on why delight is an emotional superpower that gets stronger with age.