The Emotional Wisdom Podcast: Recent Episodes
Matthew Gibson
We have all suffered pain and suffering. We have all done things that have harmed others as a result of our own hurt. But is this still ongoing? Is it embedded into our relationships? Is it stopping you from being able to truly express yourself and make the biggest difference you can? In this episode, I talk to Jean Bond, author of Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self, about the ripples that we create in life, how those ripples affect other people, and how we can be more conscious of the ripples we create to foster better relationships. Using her own experience of how the idea of ripples helped her get unstuck in her relationship, she opens up about what it really means to have a purpose in life based in compassion and kindness.
In this episode, you will learn:
- The idea of ripples from Irvin Yalom
- The meaning of life according to Alan Watts
- How the idea of ripples can help to frame your life and relationships
- How the idea of ripples helps understand your purpose in life
- How to stay compassionate and kind to others
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
We may not want to talk about it but shame is one of the only emotional experiences that can come to define who you are and how you interact with others. Trauma is another painful experience that come to do this but most of the time these two are treated separately. In this episode, I show how the two are linked but that it is the shame that is the key to healing, whether you are suffering from the effects of trauma or not. It is acknowledging and addressing the shame that has come to define you that is the core of transformatory personal development work.
In this episode, you will learn:
- What shame is
- What trauma is
- How shame and trauma are related
- How shame comes to define the self and the trauma experience
- How shame affects your ability to relate authentically with others
- What hidden shame looks like
- How to address shame
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
Understanding your inner conflicts is a central component of meaningful personal growth and being able to live a fulfilling life. Your inner conflicts give you a really good indication of the relationship you have with yourself and how you carry your scars from the past into your present. In this episode, I discuss what we mean by inner conflicts, how these come about, why they are important, and what you can do to overcome them. I give examples to understand what I mean that everyone will be able to identify with. I discuss the idea of the real self and our masks, how these are created, what they mask, and the personal consequences of having such masks. I end with the key steps to overcoming your inner conflicts to be your authentic self
In this episode, you will learn:
- What we mean by inner conflicts
- How these inner conflicts apply to you
- How they are getting in the way of being who you really are
- How they show your relationship to yourself
- What you can do to resolve them and live a more authentic life
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
A fulfilled life is a full life, but full of what? To know what a fulfilled life looks like, we need to understand the difference between what is often meant by success and how this is different to fulfilment. We also need to challenge some of the misconceptions of what a fulfilled life is, so we can also know what fulfilment is not, to know what it is. I discuss these issues in this episode, and also get behind what we need to achieve in our own personal development to be able to create a fulfilled life. Things like knowing yourself, being yourself, and making plans according to your real self are all central to being able to live a fulfilled life.
In this episode, you will learn:
- What a fulfilled life is
- What a fulfilled life isn’t
- How it is different to success
- Why it requires you to do personal development
- Why you need to discover your real self
- How it involves living a full life and feeling all of your feelings
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
Can you learn how to be fulfilled? Is it really about money and privilege? Is it something that just comes to certain people? Do you even want to be fulfilled in the first place? In this episode, I discuss why we should be focusing on creating a fulfilling life but not necessarily a happy one. Why it isn’t about money and privilege. Why we need to step out of the path that has been created for us by society and others and come to learn who we really are, to express who we really are, and make plans for our lives that are consistent with who we really are.
In this episode, you will learn:
- What fulfilment is
- Why fulfilment is important
- Why fulfilment is not happiness
- How you can learn how to become fulfilled
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
What you feel shame about says more about society and the way it controls people than it does about you. Yet we feel shame so intensely, painfully and personally. We too often focus on how we are failing or inadequate that we don’t take the more important lessons about how society seeks conformity and supports the status quo - a status quo that benefits some and disadvantages others. At the heart of shame experiences is a tension between us as individuals and our place in society. If we don’t explore our shame we will not be able to really find the courage to follow our passions and do what we really want to with out lives. In this episode, I discuss what shame is, how it shows the standards and expectations that control us, and the way to find freedom from such emotions.
In this episode, you will learn:
- What shame is
- How shame is a reflection of societal control
- How the standards and expectations that we fail to meet are set by others
- How to break free from those mechanisms of control
- How shame work is important to making the most of your life
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
How do we become alienated from ourselves? How do we act in ways that are not consistent with who we truly are? Why do we do this? How does it happen? It is much more than simple psychological explanations that focus on the individual and interpersonal problems. There is a much bigger picture we need to understand to really appreciate how we lose ourselves and become lost in the world, not knowing what it is we want to do with our lives and not knowing how to create satisfying relationships with others. In this episode, I talk to Tim Jennings, a family therapist, about how we become alienated from ourselves, how this is political as much as it is personal, how we need to understand the political to find our own freedom, and ultimately find a way back to who we really are.
In this episode, you will learn:
- What self-alienation is
- Why this is important and how common it is
- How this affects your daily experience of feeling lost, less than, conflicted, unsure and stuck in life
- How this is personal and political
- How to find ways back to yourself
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
What is envy? How does it affect you and your relationships? What do we feel envious of? And why? What does envy tell us about who we are and the masks we wear? In this episode, I talk to Jean Bond, author of Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self, about these questions. She opens up about her experiences of envy to show how destructive it can be. But we also consider the antidote to envy and how we can move past it to be more compassionate towards ourselves and others.
In this episode, you will learn:
- What envy is
- How envy affects you
- Where envy comes from
- How it reflects parts of who you are
- How to overcome envy
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
We talk a lot about growing, developing, becoming better, but very little is said about how to actually do this. So in this episode, I talk to Tim Jennings, a family therapist, about what it means to grow and how to do it. We talk about the bigger picture of the direction of growth as well as the baby steps to growth that we take as part of becoming who we really are. Gaining awareness is part of growth but not the end of the process. Gaining skills is part of the process but can only be done when you know what you want to change and what skills you need. Taking risks is part of it too, to risk doing something different that allows you to express who you really are. We talk about all of these things, how they fit together, how to do them, and more.
In this episode, you will learn:
- The baby steps to growth
- How gaining awareness is part of growing
- How taking risks is part of growing
- How developing skills is part of growing
- How you can't learn to be you from others
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
How do you overcome worry and anxiety? In this episode, I speak to Joanne Barry, a therapist, about the problem of worry and anxiety, how it can tip into depression, and what we can do about this. We discuss feeling feelings, facing ourselves, and letting things go.
In this episode, you will learn:
- What worry is good for
- How worrying goes wrong
- How to face your worry
- How to let go of your worry
- Why doing work to understand yourself is central to working on worry
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
What does it mean to be authentic? If we don’t know what it is, it is very hard to know how to be it! In this episode, I talk to Jean Bond about what it means to be authentic. We discuss the meaning of authenticity and the practice of authenticity, that is, staying true to yourself in challenging situations. Modern life poses many difficulties in terms of staying true to ourselves and it can be difficult to know what it means to be authentic in all of these situations. We go over a few examples and give ideas of how to ensure we can remain authentic while respecting others around us.
In this episode, you will learn:
- What authenticity it
- How to be authentic
- How to remain authentic in difficult relationships
- When to end relationships if there are too many threats to your ability to be yourself
- When to end a job or work if there are not enough opportunities to be yourself
- How to stay authentic in the midst of modern day challenges
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
How do you create a fulfilling life? In this episode I talk about what fulfillment is, what the components of a fulfilling life are, what the difference between a sense of fulfillment and the feeling of fulfillment is, and how to put it altogether to create a fulfilling life. Ultimately, a fulfilled life is about creating a life worth living, using what you have, and being who you are, to make the biggest difference in the world you can. It is absolutely possible to achieve this and doing so may not bring happiness or long lasting peace, because when you commit yourself to a cause worth working for you will come across frustration, anger, and many other difficult emotions, but because the direction is right these are part of that experience. A fulfilled life is a full life and that is what life is for - living.
In this episode, you will learn:
- What fulfillment is
- How to achieve a fulfilling life
- The components of a fulfilling life
- The difference between a sense of fulfillment and the feeling of fulfillment
- Why a fulfilling life is a life you won’t regret
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
Boundaries are an essential ingredient of making the most of your life because they relate to how you treat other people and how you let others treat you. They are the foundations of healthy relationships, whether romantic, familial, with friends of colleagues at work. So how much time have you thought about your boundaries? Do you know what they are and where you draw the line? Have you discussed these with the people you are in relationship with? In this episode I talk to Joanne Barry, a therapist, about what we mean by boundaries, where they come from and why they are a reflection of who you are and your relationship with yourself. We talk about the importance of doing work to know your boundaries and how this takes you to work on knowing yourself and finding your sense of worthiness to put in place boundaries and enforce them when necessary.
In this episode, you will learn:
- What boundaries are
- Why boundaries are an essential ingredient to healthy relationships
- How boundaries are an essential ingredient to making the most of your life
- What healthy boundaries look like
- Why healthy boundaries may create more conflict but make your relationships stronger
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
How do you find wisdom in crisis and confusion? Is it even possible? In this episode, I talk to Tim Jennings, a family therapist, about what being confused and in crisis means, what the origins of these states are and why they are a door to personal growth and not something to be feared and avoided. In fact, being confused and in crisis are enlightened positions, they are signals to a different way of seeing the world and seeing yourself. They are states of transition and potential transformation if you are able to avoid falling back into old ways of thinking.
In this episode, you will learn:
- The origins of the confused state and being in crisis
- Why these states can be a benefit
- Tools to express these states in healthy ways
- Ways of understanding being in crisis or confused as opportunities for growth
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
When we are faced with important decisions, how do we know if the decisions you are making are based in fear or based in personal growth? What or who do you rely on to help you with those decisions? How well do they know you? How well do you know yourself to know what would best for you? Some fears are obvious. Some less so. So how do you know is something is fear based? Growth is less familiar than fear and can sometimes be scary! So, how do we know if we are taking the fear choice or the growth choice? In this episode, I talk to Jean about these issues to look at what these different choices are, why they matter, how to know them, what lies ahead from both of them, and why a growth choice is worth taking
In this episode, you will learn:
- What the fear choice and growth choice are
- Why these matter
- Why the growth choice is worth taking
- How to know what is a growth choice
- The ingredients for a fulfilled life
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
We can all get angry but how do you use anger to benefit your relationships and make a difference in the world? How do you learn about anger to develop the knowledge and skills to work with anger effectively? If you want to be a force for good in the world and have deep, meaningful, and lasting relationships then your anger is a gift, if you only know how to express it in healthy ways. In this episode, I talk to Joanne Barry about her experience of anger as a therapist, of what issues come up for people in the therapy room, of what we can learn from this for ourselves.
In this episode, you will learn:
- Different forms of anger
- Different ways to expressing anger
- How to express it in healthy ways
- How it helps relationships
- How it helps your motivation and action
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
We all feel emotions, but what are they? Many agree that emotions are important, but why? We might be forgiven for thinking that we have simple answers to these questions, but when you look at the research, we don’t. There is a backstory to what emotions are. We have been given a dominant story about emotions, but this story has been consistently challenged by research evidence, yet it still persists as the main view on emotions. It matters because what you believe about emotions affects what you believe about your own experience and the possibilities for your life. So in this episode, I go over the debate, some of the different positions, and what this means for personal development and growth.
In this episode, you will learn:
- The dominant story of what emotions are
- Some research evidence that challenges this story
- An alternative perspective
- How this alternative perspective is more consistent with the evidence
- How this alternative perspective is more hopeful and powerful for personal growth
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
This episode is about life as a game, what this means, how to play it, and the one thing you need more than anything else to play it wisely. It means being conscious of the games people play but mostly being conscious about the game you are playing. Without conscious awareness of your own game you will forever be puzzled by your behaviours and what you get in life while also being vulnerable to simply being a pawn in someone else’s game. I talk to Andy Mullaney, author of ‘Didn’t Anyone Ever Tell You? It’s All A Game’, about these very issues and importantly how he came to find his own wisdom to take the path that let him to really know himself.
In this episode, you will learn:
- How to view life as a game
- How this helps with living life
- Who helps us along the way
- How these people are key to discovering yourself and being able to follow your passions
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
We all have minds but sometimes they deceive us and our minds can have us – meaning they can make us believe things that are not useful or helpful or true. This is never more true than when it comes to beliefs about ourselves. In this episode, I talk to Tim Jennings, an educator and therapist, about how our minds are created, where our thoughts come from, how these thoughts can deceive us, and how they can mask who we really are and get in the way of true self-expression. We talk about unhooking from these beliefs to connect with who we really are to be able to live life authentically.
In this episode, you will learn:
- How thoughts are created
- How ideas about who we are, are created
- How these ideas and thoughts are not us and can be unhelpful or even damaging
- How to start to unhook from these negative thoughts and ideas
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
If you want to make the most of your life you have to know how to decide what do to with your life. The problem is that we are not taught how to do this, asked the right questions to help us think about how to do this, or given the right support to make these decisions. We are left with a lot of unconscious processes making important decisions for us, only to find that we have gone down a path that we do not want to be down. We may have made the wrong decision for the wrong reasons. We may have made the a good choice but for the wrong reasons. Or we can make the right decision for the right reasons, if only we knew how to get to that point. In this episode, I talk to Jean Bond about what it is like to live a life that isn’t the right one for us and how to get to the point where we can make the right decision for the right reason.
In this episode, you will learn:
- The three positions you can take to make life decisions
- The root of unconscious processes
- How your unconscious processes play out in life decisions
- The position you need to get to, to be able to make the right decision
- How to get unstuck and unsure about making life decisions
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
We are sold the idea that we need self-awareness. There are many claims made for how self-awareness improves people’s lives and relationships. But in this episode, I talk to Joanne Barry, a therapist and facilitator of emotional education courses, about what the limits of self-awareness are, what we need to be more aware of, and what else we need to really make a difference in our lives and relationships.
In this episode, you will learn:
- How self-awareness can provide an illusion of progress
- How self-awareness can be a distraction from how you really feel
- How self-awareness necessarily leads to being uncomfortable feelings
- How we also need self-compassion, commitment, and a range of other skills
- Where we can go to get the awareness, compassion, commitment, and skills we need
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
This episode is about the things that stop you getting the life you want. The blocks and barriers that get in the way. The rules, expectations and limitations that society provides that narrow our vision of what life can be. The schooling system that lets us down. And our families that aren’t able to validate all of us. It is about that part of us that is honest and true for us - who we really are - and how to do something meaningful with our lives from that place. It is also about what you can do move in the direction of fulfilment, meaning, and satisfaction
What you will learn in this episode:
- The 3 main barriers to getting the life you want
- The societal barriers
- The educational barriers
- The family barriers
- How Jean answered these questions for herself and how she changed her life
- The main attribute that helps in getting the life you want
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
We all have a need to be valued, to be considered an equal to others, worthy of love and belonging. Indeed these are essential to a healthy sense of self and ability to form healthy relationships. But what happens when that need is met with conditions? When the need to be valued is no longer based on your inherent value as a human being, but rather that need is filtered through a set of conditions that change that need from one of being valued to being valuable. The person develops a sense of self that includes those conditions; that to be seen as valued one has to be valuable. In this episode, I talk to Tim Jennings, a family therapist, about his own experiences of this and how it created a false sense of self, one that masked who he really was, what it took for him to find himself again and come to understand himself as a worthy, valuable, and loveable human being.
In this episode you will learn:
- What some of the consequences of conditional love can be
- How the need to be valued can be distorted through conditional love
- How a mask based on the need to be valued develops
- What the consequences of such a mask are
- What to do about having such a mask
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
Many have a desire to perfect some aspect of their lives and there is nothing inherently wrong with having high standards, but for some people the search for perfection can move from being a desire to being a need. This can drive compulsive behaviours that masks our true desires and needs. In this episode I talk to Joanne about her struggles with perfection, her realisations of her own behaviours, and how she overcame her perfectionism. It is a lesson in masks and finding who you truly are.
In this episode you will learn:
- the many faces of perfectionism
- the root cause of perfectionism
- the cost of needing to be perfect
- how to begin to overcome perfectionism
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
We need to move away from feeling the fear and doing it anyway to facing our fear and expressing it. Only by sitting with our fears, knowing where they come from, exploring our past experiences and how they have shaped who we are and how we see the world today, will we be able to respond to what is in front of us in the present. Only by expressing our fears in ways others can understand, by being vulnerable and showing people what we fear and why we fear it, will we be able to do what we really want and need without it getting in the way. In this episode, I talk to Jean about fear, vulnerability, boundaries, being authentic and how these can change our relationships and beliefs about what is possible for ourselves.
In this episode, you will learn:
- How fear gets in the way of relationships
- How fear affects your perception of the present
- The many faces of fear
- How vulnerability is key to facing fear
- How facing fear is a major key in living authentically
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
There are many benefits of expressing our emotions authentically. Being able to know what you are feeling and be able to communicate that to someone else, without fear of judgement or consequence, is a true expression of who we really are. It allows others to really know us. It allows us to develop deep and meaningful connections with people. It allows us to experience life as satisfying and fulfilling. Yet it is hard to do. In this episode I talk to Joanne, a counsellor and therapist, about what she has learnt about the benefits of expressing our emotions authentically and how to achieve this.
In this episode we discuss:
- Why people are unable to know what they feel
- Why people are unable to communicate how they feel
- What the problems are of not knowing and communicating how we feel
- How to express our emotions authentically
- How expressing emotions authentically creates deep connections
- How to protect yourself from those who do not have your wellbeing at heart
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
What do others tell us about who we are that keep us from growing, developing, and fulfilling our potential? What do we tell ourselves that keep us from growing, developing and fulfilling our potential? At the heart of our emotional growth is an openness to looking at our beliefs about ourselves, questioning their foundations, and challenging ourselves to see things as they really are. In this episode I talk to Tim about identifying the lies we tell ourselves to develop more honest ideas of who we are and what we are capable of. This not only provides the basis of compassion but also our ability to give a voice to who we really are. Without these we have little change of being able to find true love and belonging and a passion for making changes in the world that gives us hope and direction in life.
In this episode you will learn:
- How we end up developing lies we tell ourselves about ourselves
- How we can start to identify those lies
- How to begin the process of more honest ideas about who we are
- How to use these ideas to stay true to who we are
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
The communities we are involved in are the bedrock of our development. They can be the places that can help us thrive, grow and become who we really are or they can be the places that stifle, restrict and limit our potential and experience of life. In this episode we talk about cultivating wisdom within our communities and what is central to developmental communities.
In this episode we discuss:
- The importance of community
- Identifying and valuing the people in your community
- The difference between those you seen regularly and those who are genuinely committed to you
- Challenging the cultural norm of quantity rather than quality of relationships
- How your community is the foundation of personal growth, development and wisdom
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
If emotions are the experiences that make us human, then being able to share those experiences are at the heart of real human connections. It is through our emotions that we are able to be seen, heard, and understood and to be able to see, hear and understand others. Yet there is so much that gets in the way of our ability to create such emotional honesty in relationships and so much that stops us from being able to create intimate moments with those we care deeply about.
In this episode I talk to Joanne Barry about what emotional intimacy. Her work as a therapist and course leader has given her some unique insights into these issues and she is able to get to the heart of the issue that leads us to challenge ourselves to be more intentional in creating emotional intimacy with our close friends and family.
In this episode you will learn:
- What emotional intimacy is
- What the benefits of emotional intimacy are
- How we stop ourselves from achieving emotional intimacy
- How to create emotional intimacy
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
Who are you? What lies at your core? What is that part of you that is central to not only who you are but also that connects you to everyone else? What is at the heart of your creativity and joy? How do we live life wholeheartly? These are the questions we look at in this episode as I talk to Jean Bond, who has been thinking about and teaching this to help others connect with who they really are for years.
In this episode you will learn:
- What is at the core of who we really are
- How this helps to know ourselves and others
- How to connect with this core of our selves
- What the struggles to keep connected to it are
- How this relates to the masks we wear
- What difference it makes to life from the position of this core
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
We have all had times where we have felt that we aren't good enough, where we have have had to try hard to prove our worth and still ended up feeling less than worthy. It is the failure to live up to particular standards when we feel we aren't good enough. Most of the time these standards are set by others, then internalised as our own standards, then used as the measure of who we are. This episode discusses how hard it is to get to where you want to get to from a place of unworthiness or feeling not good enough and I am talking to Tim Jennings, a teacher, educator, family therapist and a founding member of the Atlow Mill Centre for Emotional Education.
In this episode you will learn:
- How society instils a sense of not being good enough in people
- Where the standards for not feeling good enough come from
- How to start to tackle the issue of not feeling good enough
- What the path to feeling inherently worthy is
Resources mentioned in this episode:
- The book The Strange Life of Ivan Osokin
- Werner Erhard quote: If you could really accept that you weren’t ok, you could stop proving you were ok. If you could stop proving that you were ok you could get that it was ok not to be ok. If you could get that it was ok not to be ok you could get that you were ok the way you are. You’re ok, get it?
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
We all have a need to please and be liked by others but sometimes this becomes a driver for more than just a need for healthy affection and approval. It can become part of who we are. It can drive us to let ourselves down or sell ourselves out. But if it is possible to do that then it begs the question who is letting who down or who is selling who out? What is the part of us that we know to be us and what is the part of us that is getting in the way?
This episode shines a light on these moments to look at what is going on inside us. How we have adapted to our context as we grew and developed and how we have come to develop parts of us that have taken us away from our true self. In this episode we talk about a particular part of us that feels it needs to please others and be liked by them.
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
We all know wisdom when we see it but how do we become wise? and what have emotions got to do with it? In this podcast I am speaking to with Joanne Barry, a counsellor and psychotherapist, to discuss what it means to be emotionally wise, how to become emotionally wise, and what difference it makes to become emotionally wise.
In this episode, you will learn:
- What emotional wisdom is
- What difference emotional wisdom can make to your life
- What the ingredients of emotional wisdom are
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
What gets in the way of living your life and how do the messages we get through our lives take us away from who we are and what we want? In this episode I talk to Jean Bond who teaches us about when to listen to our feelings and when not to, how to be be who we were meant to be, and being your own person.
In this episode, we cover:
- Jean's story of how she came to discover what she really wanted in life
- When she knew she had to listen and act on her emotions
- When she knew she had to not listen or act on her emotions
- How her feelings were linked to who she really was
- What the benefits of taking a journey of self-discovery and acting on this are
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation
This podcast is brought to you by the Centre for Emotional Education and is hosted by Dr. Matthew Gibson, an emotions researcher. Join us in conversation with people who can teach us important lessons about feeling, healing, and finding meaning.
This podcast is about learning the hard lessons and being ok with the difficult emotions. It is about finding wisdom from our feelings. Really knowing ourselves and using this to make the right decisions and judgements. It is about knowing how to express how we feel sincerely and live without pretense so we can be who we truly are. It is about being able to put the whole of ourselves into our feelings, our work, and our beliefs. It is about connecting deeply with the people we care about. It is about experiencing the full range of emotions, no matter what they are, to feel truly alive. It is about making the most of our lives.
Resources:
- Our Website: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com
- Download Jean Bond's book 'Behind the Masks: Discovering Your True Self': https://www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/book/
- Read more from our articles: www.centreforemotionaleducation.com/articles
- Follow us on Twitter: @Ctr4EmoEdu
- Follow us on Facebook: @CentreforEmotionalEducation