BYOBF: Recent Episodes
BYOBF
Join your double-Aries co-hosts Dieyun and Dannii as they share their unedited and rather unfiltered take on where they find themselves in life right now. Each episode aims to spark stimulating and challenging conversations to empower you to be your own best friend and realise your joy doesn’t depend on anything outside you.
Let's take advantage of the courage and confidence in Aries season and reflect on 10 lessons to make our 30s the most aligned decade yet. Dannii takes the lead in this episode to share her biggest takeaways from her 20s and newly learned lessons in her early 30s to face this decade with more freedom and an expanded mindset. Her key points are:
- Not all relationships will grow in the same direction as you. Breakups (friendship, family, and romantic) will happen and that’s ok.
- Healing looks different for everyone.
- It’s ok to walk away - everything can’t be forever and there is power in accepting that.
- Pain isn’t forever.
- Begging for the bare minimum isn’t love
- Self-love is the root of all love and trust
- You repeat what you don’t repair
- Quality over quantity
- Life isn’t linear
- Take care of your health
If you enjoy our show, please leave us a five-star review, a comment, and share it on social media @letsbyobf on Instagram and Tiktok so it can reach more people who may benefit from our content. Looking forward to having you in the next episode, until then, every day is a great day to be your own best friend!
BODY SHAPE IS NOT A TREND!
That's pretty much the thesis of this episode. Do you work out to get a certain measurement or weight? Do you live by society's beauty standards? Do you identify as a certain size? Is your body your personality? Do you feel like running out of love and gratitude and viewing your body as the biggest enemy?
This candid and vulnerable discussion is inspired by Dieyun's recent episode of body dysmorphia, where unconsciously she attacked her body when feeling overwhelmed by a significant life challenge. We usually develop a toxic relationship with our body for conformity, comparison, and measurement, while the body alone doesn't present any pressing threat or danger to our survival. By gaining clarity on the trigger, body image is often a shield our ego uses to protect us from the real challenge, but this shield hurts us a lot more than it can heal.
Our intention is not persuasion, but just to add more perspectives on our conditioning around the body, beauty, and worth. Our brain doesn't always feel like loving us, but our heart and body have ALWAYS been on our side. By turning within, our body have been our best friend all along, and it has a lot of wisdom to share too.
If you enjoy our show, please leave us a five-star review, a comment, and share it on social media @letsbyobf on Instagram and Tiktok so it can reach more people who may benefit from our content.
Happy Aries season everybody! Dannii and I are both Aries. In celebration of our birthday season, we are doing a 2-part series on the 20 lessons we've learned in our 20s for those who are journeying through with us. Wrapping up her third decade, Dieyun reflects on her aha moments in her 20s, especially for those who are still in their 20s to feel less alone and to take advantage of this decade of exploration. Her 10 lessons are:
- Write yourself that permission slip, and don’t outsource your power to others (to feel a certain way, to do that thing, etc)
- Nothing I experience is about me
- “I’ll be happy when….” is the greatest thief of joy
- Forgiveness is between me and me
- Not knowing what you are “supposed” to do is the biggest sign that you are on the right path
- Rest is essential, and rest is more than sleep
- Build a spiritual ecosystem to fuel your mind
- Saying no = saying yes
- Commit to a series of micro habits that yield the most significant impact to your day
- Stop trying to be happy
If you enjoy our show, please leave us a five-star review, a comment, and share it on social media @letsbyobf on Instagram and Tiktok so it can reach more people who may benefit from our content. Looking forward to having you in the next episode, until then, every day is a great day to be your own best friend!
Weddings, baby showers, bridal showers, bachelorette, graduation, housewarming--adulting is filled with consumption, and often we are "volunteered" to spend a good chunk of money for our friends during these significant milestones. What are the logistical compromises you need to make to fulfill these engagements (cutting down vacation funds, stopping investing, cutting out dining funds, etc)? Have you ever forced yourself into doing one of these when you truly didn't want to spend the money and time at all?
Relationships involve both emotional and financial investments and commitments, and they can get REALLY expensive. We hope our conversation helps you gain awareness of your spending in relationships and find room to align your values in the material and emotional realms together.
If you enjoy our show, please leave us a five-star review, a comment, and share it on social media @letsbyobf on Instagram and Tiktok so it can reach more people who may benefit from our content.
Let's talk about money honey! Are you scared of money because you've always been told that it's hard to make? Do you hate money because it's "filthy?" Do you enjoy money's company? Starting from reflecting upon some common limiting beliefs surrounding money, Dieyun chats about how she released the old beliefs that inspired her to take more aligned actions to take care of, enjoy, and attract more money and feeling of abundance in life. Topics covered in this episode includes:
- Limiting beliefs about money from our upbringing: wealth should be hidden, and making money isn’t supposed to be easy;
- Money is neutral, money is not worth
- Money mindsets we love: treating money as a lover and a friend. Does money like my company? What can I do to be a better friend to money? Out of all the people in the world, why would money want to come to me?
- Money care: Tithing; Monthly audit and allow my earnings tell a story; Investment; Thank you receipts
- Books and resources we recommend: How to get good with money Tiffany Aliche; The Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel; A random walk down wall street Burton Gordon Malkiel; Fiscal Femme by Ashley Feinstein Gerstley
We hope this conversation has bought more clarity, inspiration, and courage to your wholesome journey. If you enjoy our show, please leave us a five-star review, a comment, and share it on social media @byobf_ on Instagram and @byobf on Tiktok so it can reach more people who may benefit from our content.
"Is it ANOTHER Valentines Day I'm spending alone?" "What should I get for my partner for VDay?" "I.....kinda just need some space for myself"
After "cuffing season," it's the New Year Resolutions episode then the "love-is-in-the-air" February. No matter if you are a single Pringles or someone in a relationship, self-love is always a constant lesson for us to learn. Social media and advertisements tend to commercialize and glamorize self-care. After loads of money spent on luxury skincare tools and whatever products out there, self-love all goes back to the essence of loving the parts of us that we wish didn't exist.
For those who are single, it's easy to fantasize about having a partner to relieve the burden; and for those coupled up, there's that challenge of carving out personal space and not losing the individual identity as we grow together. Let's use the month of love to take ownership of our own fabulousness and talents, and embody the lover we truly deserve.
Please join our BYOV (Be Your Own Valentine) 7-day challenge where we take 7 small steps to build up a more consistent, aligned self-love romantic practice.
Day 1 Write yourself a love letter
Day 2 Move your body
Day 3 Add a small, daily luxury to your environment
Day 4 Find a casual magic
Day 5 Take yourself on a solo date
Day 6 Try something new
Day 7 Intuitive cooking
Day 8 Valentine's Day: Read yourself the love letter
Wanna be besties–connect with us @byobf on Tiktok and Instagram and DM us your questions, thoughts, and suggestions for things you want to hear us discuss. We’d so appreciate it if you could leave us a 5-star review and tag us on social, so we can thank you personally!
Money can be a restrictive factor in friendship--Uber, activity cost, dining, a trip, a workout class, etc. How to have a satisfying experience for everyone while making smart money decisions? How did/do you feel when you are either the one with a smaller or a bigger budget? What are some hard conversations or feelings you've had? This episode discusses exactly these tricky, taboo questions we often shy away from. From personal experiences with setting financial boundaries to practices that work around different budgets with friends, we hope our share and reflection encourage you to nurture your relationships with wealth and friendship for them to work for your overall growth and joy.
Wanna be besties–connect with us @byobf on Tiktok and Instagram and DM us your questions, thoughts, and suggestions for things you want to hear us discuss. We’d so appreciate it if you could leave us a 5-star review and tag us on social, so we can thank you personally!
Happy 2023 Besties! Welcome to Season 2 of the Be Your Own Best Friend Podcast. We are back after a much needed creative hiatus and are thrilled to elevate self love, friendship, and growth with you. We each shared 3 self love hacks INs and OUTs to make 2023 a more aligned and authentic year. From ditching New Year Resolutions to fulfilling more promises to ourselves, we hope our small shares can provide you something feasible and attainable to build a healthy, joyous foundation of the year.
Wanna be besties? Connect with us @byobf on Tiktok and Instagram and DM us your questions, thoughts, and suggestions for things you want to hear us discuss. We’d so appreciate it if you could leave us a 5-star review and tag us on social, so we can thank you personally!
Greetings from Lisbon, Portugal! In this episode, I--Dieyun--am sharing 3 small but transformative reflections that have improved my solo travel experience massively in my current trip to Europe.
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Stop traveler guilt yourself--you don't have to check everything off the itinerary to make it a "good" trip;
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Get off the "on-call mode"--those check-in texts from friends can wait and prioritizing your physical and mental energies should come first; and
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Give yourself permission to occupy space and time to enjoy your meals and the experience.
Travel is active learning--about both the destination and a new version of ourselves that's grander, braver, and kinder. Keep on learning, and keep practicing being your own best friend, wherever you are!
Does it feel like no matter what you do, you aren't accomplishing as much as friends? Even if you actually are? If you're feeling left behind, you aren't alone. This week, Dannii explores the concept of failure and chats about ways she's been refocusing her mindset.
Do you ever feel the richness of friendship differs from country to country, culture to culture? Do you find the expectation of a "good friend" is word-oriented vs. action-oriented in different cultural contexts? In this episode, we discuss the different experiences of asking for help, offering support, and friendship expectations across borders. While some are "ask" societies where people prioritize a sense of personal space by asking "let me know if you need help," some are "offer" societies where it is the norm to offer solutions and support proactively to those in need. These cultural expectations can often get lost in translation, and we are here discussing why there might be such divide and how can we show up with a stronger, more compassionate presence as a friend.
What holds you back?
On this week's episode, Dannii and Dieyun chat about how fear works, how it has impacted their lives, why we may be afraid to do the important things in our lives and how to conquer it!
Do you have a case of the 'sorries'? As Elton John once said, "sorry seems to be the hardest word" but in our culture, it seems to be one of the easiest. For many, apologising has become a reflex and, for some, a toxic habit. In this week's episode, Dieyun and Dannii speak about the 'sorries' and why we need to stop apologising.
Accept it or not but our emotional and physical health is intrinsically tied to those who came before us. Some of our deepest wounds come from our family. But your lineage does NOT need to hold you hostage. This week Dieyun and Dannii chat about what it takes to break free from the trauma and negative energy that may be blocking you from living the fullest and richest life you can.
Calling in our soul mates by embodying the lover we want to have. Scheduling in romance, luxury, and adventure into your week and love yourself the way your soul mate would. What does grace look like for you? How would your lover comfort you in a moment of challenge? What do you crave the most when you are lonely? Don’t wait for another person, give what you need to yourself now, you are all you need!