Out of Queeriosity: Recent Episodes
Elena Joy Thurston
Consider us your Field Guide for Queer Pride. You will hear from the best of the best in terms of queer business leaders, queer relationship experts, the activists working to protect us all, and everyday LGBTQ+ people that have figured a few things out so you don’t have to.
“Out of Queeriosity” is brought to you by Pride and Joy Foundation.
Hey fam! I am so excited to introduce you to our next guest, Ursula Benward. She has been a counselor for almost 20 years now and uses her lived experience as a queer, Native woman with ADHD, OCD, trauma, and neurodivergence to inform her practice. She is originally from the Navajo Nation.
Speaking with Ursula was one of those experiences that simultaneously felt new and inspiring, while also feeling at home. I grew up with the Navajo Nation in my backyard and took for granted the many friendships and memories I have from there. Chatting with Ursula felt completely new, as every conversation I have with another out lesbian, because that’s where I am in my journey still.
But as she talked, vivid memories from years ago came back to me in a way I wasn’t expecting. It’s amazing how the way I didn’t understand myself colors so many memories. Ursula has had the most amazing career, in the mental health field. From being the child therapist on a remote Native reservation to teaching families resilience skills, to manning a crisis line, to present-day being in private practice. And as we love to hear, along the way to professional success and fulfillment, she found love too.
Fam, we are living in intense times and we are living our one precious wild life. We at Pride and Joy Foundation want to make sure you’re able to experiences moments of peace and joy, because you, Dear One, deserve to experience peace and joy. To that end we’ve published our first meditative coloring book for our community “Color Me Queer”.
Maybe you’re like me and you didn’t get to experience basic childhood memories with authenticity. Maybe you need passive physical activity with some white noise in order to shut down all the mental tabs and experience true silence. Maybe you want to show a loved one how much you care about them, without risking you’re supporting a rainbow-washing corporation, but instead supporting a Foundation working to create systemic change.
One of the most unique meditative coloring books you’ll find, our hope is that you’re able to experience moments of peace and joy within it’s pages. Order your copy and gifts at www.ColorMeQueerBook.com When you purchase through our website, we receive a $6 donation, but full transparency, it’s also a few dollars cheaper on Amazon. To get a copy with a personal note from me, your host Elena Joy, head to www.ColorMeQueerBook.com Thank you family!
We can’t do any of this without you and we appreciate you so much! Now get ready to laugh with the amazing Ursula Benward.
http://www.hozhocounseling.com/
https://www.instagram.com/hozhocounselingllc/
Native 2SLGBTQIA+ links:
https://www.wernative.org
https://www.nativeyouthsexualhealth.com/peersupportmanual
https://mmiwusa.org
https://www.csvanw.org/mmiw/
https://www.navajonationpride.com
https://strongheartshelpline.org
https://www.iwrising.org/abortion-fund
Our podcast host. and feature in this episode. is Elena Joy Thurston.
Elena Joy Thurston is an inspirational LGBTQ+ speaker, trainer, author, and founder of the nonprofit Pride and Joy Foundation, which is dedicated to reducing the rate of suicide and homelessness in the LGBTQ+ community. Elena inspires her audiences to learn how emotional intelligence can improve company morale and productivity, changing members' lives in a practical way. A Mormon mom of four who lost her marriage, her church, and her community when she came out as a lesbian, her viral TEDx talk on surviving conversion therapy has been viewed more than 45,000 times and landed her media and speaking opportunities with ABC, CBS, FOX, Penn State, University of North Texas, Michael’s, Logitech, and more. Elena Joy is also one of the subjects of the feature film documentary Conversion, premiering Fall 2022. Learn more about Elena Joy at www.ElenaJoyExperience.com.
Kristen Kile runs multiple businesses including merch screen printing and helping adults transition to their next stage in life, i.e. what do we keep, give away, and sell so that we can downsize. Kristen taught Elena Joy how to fly fish and on the off chance they can get away from the kids and their multiple companies, you can find them fishing on one of Arizona's mountain streams.
Elena Joy and Kristen are partners and co-parenting their four kids along with Elena Joy's ex-husband and his beautiful wife. Elena Joy and Kristen navigate the pressures of parenting alongside modeling inclusive behavior, navigating the world as LGBTQ+ individuals, and raising an LGBTQ+ child.
Don't forget to check out Pride and Joy Publishing's newest publication, Color Me Queer. Available on Amazon and all major retailers but every purchase on the Pride and Joy Foundation website allows for $6 directly to support our mission: to reduce the rate of suicide and homelessness in the LGBTQ+ community. Get your copy today!
Amy Porter (pronouns are she/they so you will hear us use them interchangeably in this episode and in the show notes) is an educator, achieving Bachelor's degrees in Education and Music, and is a passionate Congenital Heart Disease (CHD) Advocate. Conventionally unconventional, she and her wife built their own family and are mothers to two young children.
Amy is a self-proclaimed “research nerd.” Her curiosity about the world, her passion for knowledge, and the lived experience of her son’s critical heart defect diagnosis have led her to educate sonographers and parents about the importance of early detection.
Amy has been educating and inspiring audiences since 2009. Amy's nonprofit is www.1in100.org To learn more about CHD, please visit www.tinytickers.org
Here's the video of Jimmy Kimmel telling his story about his son. They were fortunate to have had an attentive nurse and they were able to avoid a lot of permanent chaos due to someone being on top of things. They noticed something was off around 3 hours after birth, which in Amy's son's case, would have been far too late.
To learn more about vocal empowerment for LGBTQ+ leaders, head to www.KeynoteQueers.com, the class will run again in fall 2022.
Follow Amy on Instagram to learn how we can all advocate for the health of the next generation of kids but putting less focus on finding out the gender and a little more focus on heart screening.
You can also connect with Amy on LinkedIn.
In this episode of Out of Queeriosity, we sit down with Meghan P.
Meghan has been a part of our network of parents for a while now but in this episode, we sit down to get granular on her experience raising her nonbinary child, her path to advocacy and getting comfy speaking up publicly for her child and other LGBTQ+ youth.
If you resonate with this conversation, we invite you to join us at our next Parent Advocacy group meeting on May 22nd, 2022 where we will be reviewing the graphic novel, Gender Queer by Maia Kobabe. Find details about this meeting and all following meetings at www.PrideandJoyParents.com.
Can't wait to see you there!
Queers in the Country was a three-day meetup for LGBTQ+ and BIPOC nomads and local Kentuckians in April 2022. It was sponsored and hosted by The Stonehouse at Silver Creek, as well as
- Georgia-Pacific
- CoPilot
- Victron
- Harvest Hosts
- Aeropress
- MOON
- VanMade Gear
- Poppy & Rod
Follow Pride & Joy Foundation, as well as Queers in the Country to learn more about our future events!
Hey, fam. So about a year ago, Pride and Joy Foundation began a survey to find out what employee benefits could a company offer that would have the biggest impact on LGBTQ+ families. We've had almost 300 People respond. About 70% identify as LGBTQ+ themselves, and about 30% identify as family members. The number one response so far by a longshot, is extensive mental health coverage, which employers weren't surprised to hear. But often the response I hear is, well, we offer that and no one uses it. Well, as we know, as LGBTQ+ people, it's often quite challenging to find someone in mental health who is in our state, covered by our plan, and a part of our community, or even, obviously, affirming of our community. Seeking mental health support is vulnerable, and the barriers of access can feel huge. So after we figure out the logistics of how to find support, and how we're going to pay for it, finding a therapist who gets us is another monumental milestone. So how can the everyday employee access truly inclusive mental health care? Find out from today's guest, James Murray, the CEO of a Black owned company, Therify.
Therify provides personalized mental health resources to help improve employee satisfaction, well-being, and belonging. Jame's goal is to create a world where access to inclusive mental health is as easy as going on your morning walk. Listen to James share more on his mental health journey as a Black man in America and how he took things into his own hands to help other marginalized people have better access to affordable and inclusive mental health care.
If you are an employer or practitioner who would like to partner with Therify, please visit their website, https://therify.co to fill out an application and you will be contacted directly for the onboarding process or email James directly, jem@thereify.co.
Did you learn anything new? Did this episode spark a new thought? What about you, do you feel like identity is crucial when considering mental health care access? I'd love to hear your thoughts. Join us on our blog, or on our Instagram page @PrideandJoyFoundation. Thank you so much for joining us. Please consider sharing this episode with anyone in your network who needs to hear. Be good to yourself fam, I appreciate you.
Bio: James previously led partnerships with digital news organizations at Facebook. Prior to Facebook, he worked on the enterprise sales team at InVision, a venture-backed product design platform. James received a BA from Howard University and MBA from Vanderbilt University.
- Email: jem@therify.com
- Website: https://therify.co/
- Linked In: https://www.linkedin.com/company/mytherify/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hellotherify/
Hey fam! I am so excited to introduce you to our next highlighted speaker from the Pride and Joy Summit, Kalyela Josephs, also known as "Coach K". Kalyela “Coach K” Josephs is an Inspirational Speaker and certified Life and Performance Coach who uses holistic strategies to improve the well-being of others. Her tried and true formula of human energy management, resilience, and life’s purpose has helped over a thousand professionals reach their highest performance. She empowers others to use life’s challenges as a catalyst for growth. Coach K taps into her internal strengths of inspiration, empathy, and sense of humor to relate to individuals, leaning into her own authenticity to guide them to a place of confidence within their personal and professional lives. The ambitious, purpose-driven, ball of high energy, barrels through life’s barriers alongside of her clients, sharing her personal testimony of triumphs while thriving in her individuality.
On a personal note, I’ve had the pleasure of meeting Kalyela in person and working with her in Pride and Joy Foundation as a co-facilitator in our suicide prevention workshops. You know how some people just have an energy that lets you breath deep, let your hair down, and enjoy being your true self around them? That’s totally Coach K. We met for what was supposed to be a quick dinner while I was in her hometown for a speaking gig. Four hours later, we were shutting the place down because we just could not stop laughing and talking. I tell you what, after being so isolated for two years, that dinner with Kalyela filled my soul! And I wanted to give you a taste of that so I give you, Kalyela Josephs in today's episode.
Coach K shares her soul with us in this journey of coming out, reconciling with parents, and finding ways where queerness and God can co-exist.
Kalyela taught us about how we are queer on purpose, this isn't a mistake. This isn't an anomaly. This isn't just different from mainstream society. And we need to deal with all the ramifications of that. I was made queer on purpose, I am queer on purpose. And there is power in that. Every time I access my queerness in non authentic and beautiful ways, incredible wisdom comes forth. I am so appreciative of that. And so grateful for people like Coach K, who helped me see that within me when I can't see it myself.
I'd love to hear from you on how this talk affected you and what you thought of it. And what do you think? Are you queer on purpose? Are your loved ones queer on purpose? I'm so interested so get in that blog post or in that social media post tag me and let me know what you think. I hope you enjoyed Coach K's story about being Queer on Purpose.
If you want more from Coach K, check out her website here and make sure to follow her on Instagram!
I’m so excited for you to hear from Dr. Lynyetta Willis. She spoke at our Pride and Joy Summit about addressing Intergenerational Trauma in our families, as well as in our individual lives. She shares an incredible framework for identifying intergenerational trauma and dealing with it. It’s also available on her website and the link is in our show notes, so don’t stress about taking notes if you’re driving or out on a walk.
She begins with examples of intergenerational trauma that Black families might be experiencing and extends it out to how queer members of families might also be experiencing it. She tells story after story that is so relatable so that by the time you get to the end of the episode you know the framework and how it can be implemented.
At the end of her talk, you’ll hear that I was able to ask her a few questions and gain even more awareness about how to go from Triggered to Transformed, which also happens to be the name of the incredibly impactful program that Dr. Willis leads for families, another link down below.
This episode is sponsored by Queers in the Country, a 3 day LGBTQ+ meetup in April 2022 hosted by a lesbian-owned venue in rural Kentucky. This amazing festival is raising funds for Pride and Joy Foundation. Overnight and day passes are now available, visit www.QueersintheCountry.com to learn more.
I give you, Dr. Lynyetta Willis.
https://drlwillis.com/
https://drlwillis.com/quiz/
Dr. Lynyetta Willis, psychologist, family empowerment coach, speaker, and award-winning author - helps frustrated families break free from Stable Misery™ and unhelpful parenting and partnership patterns, so they can create more harmony at home.
Over 20 years of journeying with countless clients led her to design the research-supported Elemental Living® Model and P.A.T.H.S. Relationship Framework. These powerful tools help parents and partners improve communication, minimize overreactions, and transform intergenerational trauma.
Dr. Willis’ Harmony in the Home Couples Program and Triggered to Transformed™ Group Parenting Program have received rave reviews from couples and parents across the globe in South Africa, Israel, New Zealand, and Australia.
A sought after speaker, media contributor, and author, Dr. Willis’s multi-award winning book, My Forgotten Self: A Story about a Girl, a Powerful Encounter, and a Universal Message, received high acclaim from individuals such as Dr. Shefali Tsabary, author of The Conscious Parent and “Oprah’s Parenting Expert”; Dr. Michael Bernard Beckwith, author and spiritual leader of Agape International Truth Center; and Michal Berg, President and CEO of Spirituality for Kids International, Inc.
Dr. Willis lives in Georgia with her husband and their two children.
Stable Misery Free Roadmap - www.healingstablemisery.com
Quiz! What’s Your Parenting Trigger Score - https://drlwillis.link/trigger-score
Email: hello@drlwillis.com
https://www.drlwillis.com (website)
https://www.instagram.com/drlwillis/
https://www.facebook.com/DrLWillis
https://www.linkedin.com/in/drlwillis/
Arielle and our founder, Elena Joy, discuss aspects of self-love that are unique to the LGBTQ+ community.
Hey fam! I hope you’re enjoying our season of showcasing the incredible speakers at the Pride and Joy Summit from May 2021. This episode is sponsored by Queers in the Country, a 3 day meetup in April for LGBTQ+ and BIPOC nomads, hosted by a queer-owned venue in rural Kentucky. This amazing vanlife festival is raising funds for Pride and Joy Foundation. Overnight and day passes are now available, visit www.QueersintheCountry.com to learn more.
Today, we have Arielle D’Angelo is an incredible coach and leader in our community with her company We the Rainbow.
Self-love is an integral topic in the LGBTQ+ community, one that words can’t fully encapsulate. Sometimes I feel like straight people don’t understand the amount of self-love that it takes to live a truly authentic life. Recently, Pride and Joy Parents hosted a workshop focused on self-harm in our youth. Our facilitator taught a concept about the “layers of protection” that we all need. It starts with self, and expands in concentric circles to family, school and/or work, and then society at large.
I love that it starts with self. We have to feel safe enough with our own selves to be authentic inside, as we build the safety to be authentic on the outside. And self-love is critical to that safety.
This is also an important concept for parents of LGBTQ+ youth to understand. We, as parents, can shower our child with love. But if they don’t feel the love and safety within themselves first, it’s almost impossible for that love to penetrate them. So one of our most important jobs as parents is to foster deep self-love, both modeling our own and helping our children to identify it in their own lives.
One of my favorite parts of Arielle is how she shows a different side of what it means to be queer. There is such a lesbian stereotype of flannel-wearing, home depot going, Subaru driving lesbians, (and while it’s a personal favorite) it’s just one aspect of our community at large. Arielle and her visibility drive home the point that queerness exists in nuance, not in singular stereotype.
I hope you enjoyed this discussion on self-love and I invite you to contribute your thoughts on our blog post for this episode.
If you want more from Arielle, she'll soon be enrolling for Unleashed, her signature group coaching program for LGBTQ+ humans who are ready to release patterns and internalized shame around their identity and create new empowering narratives so they can confidently live the authentic life that they so deeply desire and deserve!
If interested, visit arielledangelo.com/unleashed to apply or send Arielle a message on instagram!
Again, thank you to our sponsor of this episode, Queers in the Country.com. Be sure to visit to learn about the game changing experience of this weekend in the country, sitting in community with our rural queer family.
The next speaker from our Pride and Joy Summit from May 2021, is Dean Rasmussen. Dean is a transman, hailing from Canada, and was on our planning committee for the Summit. Dean was in charge of our Gender Identity track, which was a powerful experience for everyone involved. When Dean agreed to also speak for his track, I was overjoyed. Because in the months we had been working together to create this Summit, I had learned what an incredible human he is.
Dean is a fellow conversion therapy survivor. He is a parent and a husband, as well as a trans life coach. In our planning meetings, Dean was never the loudest or the most boisterous. Dean never shoved his way into the spotlight, and even giving this talk was one of the more challenging things he’s done. Visibility is not easy for every queer person.
Yet, Dean had this calm, quiet authority. Dean has LIVED a lot of life. His wisdom, his clarity on sticky situations, was a guiding force as we planned this huge international event for the first time. As you’ll hear in his talk, Dean has done the WORK, within himself and within his family to create the life he’s always deserved.
Now, Dean’s talk ends in a beautiful way and here in this podcast, we aren’t typically including the Q&A with the audience, that happened after the talks. However, someone asked a question about being authentic as a trans person with your children. And I couldn’t miss the opportunity to share his earned wisdom with you our listener. So you’ll notice that at the end.
Huge thanks to Dean, not only for sharing his story but also for being an integral part of the success of our Summit. Dean’s story is so unique and yet universal. So many of us made commitments and decisions in our early 20s before we even really knew who we were. So many of us have had multiple coming-outs, between sexual orientation, gender identity, and for some like our previous episode, neurodiversity. I consider Dean like a guiding light. Someone who forged their own path through the darkness of internalized homophobia and transphobia and is now waiting on the other side, light held high and bright for us to see, and waiting to welcome us home.
Thank you dear listener for joining us on this journey. This episode is brought to you by Outwrite Authors, the six-week intensive “how to publish your nonfiction book” class, offered by Pride and Joy Foundation. Registration is open till the end of February 2022. Visit www.OutWriteAuthors.com.
If someone came to mind as you were listening, that would also enjoy hearing from Dean, will you share this episode with them?
I appreciate you, fam. Be good to yourselves.
Dean's website: https://everydayanomalycoaching.ca/
and on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everydayanomalycoaching/
One of my favorite quotes is that “If you’re going to be in a long-term relationship with someone, you’re going to attend thousands of mini-funerals.” This speaks to the idea that over time, people change. Their old self dies and we get to fall in love with the newest version of them.
I love to turn this around and apply it to ourselves. If we’re going to be in an authentic relationship with ourselves, we need to attend a thousand mini-funerals. We need to be willing to examine ourselves: our thoughts, actions, emotions without judgment so that we can truly get to know ourselves and live healthier more fulfilled lives. No one illustrates this idea better than today’s speaker, Joris Lechene.
Joris lives at the intersection of being Black, Gay, and Neurodivergent. Not only do we get an inside look into his journey of self-acceptance and celebration, but we get to peek at the blueprint so that we can do the same introspection. We get to see how our own lives could improve if we’re willing to drop the stereotypes, drop the judgment, and truly SEE ourselves.
The most sincere thanks to Joris for sharing his story so deeply with us. If you haven’t followed Joris already on social media we have all his links in the show notes. Another valuable link in there is the article we wrote regarding the massive overlap of neurodivergence and LGBTQ+ people. Some studies are suggesting it’s as high as 40% of LGBTQ+ people are also neurodivergent. Parents and organizational leaders especially should check out that article so that the information can be used to increase inclusion, safety, and inclusion within the most important areas of our lives.
From everyone at the Pride and Joy Foundation, thank you for joining us today. We appreciate you, fam. Be good to yourself!
https://www.instagram.com/joris.lechene/
https://www.tiktok.com/@joris_explains
https://www.prideandjoyfoundation.com/blog/raisingLGBTQneurodiversekids
Hey fam!
The next speaker we are showcasing is Bree Pear, CEO of the clothing and social impact company Only Human. Often touted as a queer influencer that creates real impact, Bree is well-known for curating events, social content, and even clothing that drives the needle for social change. She's also an author in our book, Thriving in Business: Strategies for the LGBTQ+ Entrepreneur. Available at www.QueerBusinessBook.com and everywhere books are sold.
So let's Meet Bree, she’s a tech-nerd entrepreneur with a passion for humans and a drive to make waves in this world. In 2016 Bree founded Only Human—a platform for good that brings humans together for a deeper purpose. After hitting rock bottom in her own life she recognized that she had the power to change her narrative and use her skills to help bring others together. Bree truly believes that by building a community of like-minded humans willing to make changes in this world, we can create a ripple effect that's felt on a global scale.
This talk is Bree sharing how she turned rock bottom into the best thing that ever happened to her and how she used that growth to create an inclusive give-back community for millions of LGBTQ+ humans worldwide.
I truly love how REAL each of our speakers got with our audience at the Pride and Joy Summit. Each of us has been through times when we had to deconstruct who we WERE to get to where we ARE. It's not an easy journey but I really feel like it's one of our queer superpowers.
Straight people are rarely forced to take hard, honest looks at themselves and deconstruct what pieces of them came from external forces and what is true and authentic to them internally. Because we've done that work, we're able to show up as our full selves: at work, in relationships, as community members, etc.
We'd love to hear from you about how you've taken your queer superpower and used it to impact the world. Maybe just your neighbor, or just your family, or maybe on a larger scale. Email us at info@prideandjoyfoundation, I'm excited to hear from you!
Huge thanks to Bree and her team at Only Human. We hope you loved this episode of Out of Queeriosity. I appreciate you, fam. Be good to yourselves.
All the good links: www.QueerBusinessBook.com
http://onlyhumanco.com/
www.breepear.com
http://instagram.com/breepear
http://facebook.com/breepear
http://twitter.com/breepear
https://www.linkedin.com/in/breepear/
http://youtube.com/onlyhumanco
This episode features Rocio Sanchez, pronouns she/they. I’m literally not even sure how we met, my earliest memory of Rocio is from my first few days on TikTok in the height of the pandemic and watching them do the simplest TikTok to crazy ridiculous results.
Then I noticed that Rocio took those results to LinkedIn, and broke them down so we could all see how they achieved that success. With their social media savvy, nonbinary fashion education in Paris, and their ability to speak three languages fluently, I instantly recognized queer talent to the nth degree.
Rocio specializes in business development, social media automation and optimization, and growth hacking. They help start-ups, freelancers, entrepreneurs, and agencies worldwide build brands and create marketing plans and strategies to grow their businesses.
Their clients are USA-, Spain-, and Latin American-based, and speak languages spanning English, French, and Spanish. Their talk today, FOR YOU, is all about hacking LinkedIn, but in a gay way. I give you, Rocio Sanchez.
- https://www.linkedin.com/in/rocio-d-sanchez/
- https://www.instagram.com/marketingbyrocio
- marketingbyrocio.com
Definitely check out Rocio's fashion industry collaboration with the awesome queer hub, Queerency. http://queerency.com/fashion
We kick off this season with the opening keynote from our Pride and Joy Summit, a queer conference we sponsored in May 2021. The keynote was given by Barry Brandon (pronouns he/her/they), more popularly known as The Queer Indigo.
If you’re on Instagram or TikTok, chances are you’ve seen their trademark, super-human and badass videos They've been inspiring people from all over the globe to see themselves walking in beautiful international cities with all the confidence of Queer Indigo. The freedom of expression, the joy in authenticity, the raw power of knowing who you are and your inherent value, you can find it all in these 30-second slo-mo videos and it’s brilliant.
In his professional life, Brandon runs a creative and experiential agency called For All Humans, focusing on the growth and expansion of emerging and well-established brands through immersive events, engaging activations, and comprehensive marketing campaigns that capture your spirit and convey your messaging while promoting community building and inclusivity.
But personally, Barry has had a tumultuous life, like so many of us. It’s that story that Barry shares with us today and we are so honored. I give you, The Queer Indigo, Barry Brandon.