Home for Being: Recent Episodes
Home For Being
Welcome to a Home for Being, created by Mick Hendrikx and Joe Raphael. Our podcast navigates the dynamics, challenges and joys involved with being a unique, evolving, human being in a world that is constantly trying to make us into something we are not. Every week, we have raw and unfiltered conversations where we share our experience, triggers and lessons learned to explore with you the best way we all can live an authentic and fulfilling life. Together, as a supportive community, we encourage each other to tap into our own loving source and grow our self-awareness to become who we really are
Joey & Mick discuss a lot of stuff and have some great laughs along the way. They discuss their experience with finding an affirming and supporting community and having the courage to let go of negative people and energy vampires.
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In this episode, Mick and Joe talk about insecure attachment styles and the anxious one in particular. Central theme is how to identify and heal these core wounds to move towards more secure relationships with yourself and others.
Resources:
The Attachment Theory: How Childhood Affects Life
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In this episode, Mick and Joe discuss the challenges in putting words into action and how to overcome these to actually getting things done.
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In today’s episode we welcome back our special guest and friend Ari Pereira for the third time. Ari is a mind enthusiast and putting the healing to practice through Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP), Energy Healing and Hypnotherapy. Her motto is that we don’t have to break down, to break free. In this episode, we discuss Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP). Ari demonstrates a few different tools to help clear up the friction that sometimes occurs between the conscious and the unconscious that are beneficial and effective. You don’t want to miss this episode.
Resources:
https://linktr.ee/Ari_Pereira
https://www.aripereira.com/
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In today’s episode we welcome back our special guest and friend Ari Pereira. Ari is a mind enthusiast and putting the healing to practice through Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP), Energy Healing and Hypnotherapy. Her motto is that we don’t have to break down, to break free.
In this episode we dive deep into Energy Healing. You might think; how can energy be related to healing? Ari explains that the idea of energy healing is that our healing doesn’t just come from our physical world - but also from an additional layer/ sphere outside of this, called energy. She talks about what this energy is, how you can sense/notice it, what chakra’s are, how our emotional/ mental wounds are not physical yet impact our physique, the relationship between thought, emotion and energy, the role quantum physics play in proving the case for energy healing and finally the aura. Later on, in this episode we look at what energy healing entails in practice. Ari discusses different techniques such as channeling universal energy, and eventually showcases a ‘Waterfall’ exercise, to clear our aura. Besides from clearing our aura we also look at how to protect your aura too with a small exercise at the end. Enjoy the conversation for now, and be sure to share with us your experience when you do some of these exercises or if you have other types of healing we should be looking into.
Resources:
https://linktr.ee/Ari_Pereira
https://www.aripereira.com/
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In today’s episode we welcome our special guest and friend Ari Pereira. Ari is a mind enthusiast and putting the healing to practice through Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP), Energy Healing and Hypnotherapy. Her motto is that we don’t have to break down, to break free. We kick off this mini-series spontaneously with a little hypnosis session - one that won’t put you into a trance state. While Mick will undergo this one, we invite you to participate as you listen, should you be in a safe place or state to do so (definitely not while driving!). The exercise will teach us how certain thoughts and feelings are trapped in our body and how we can release those, leaving us in a more calm and peaceful state.
Resources:
https://linktr.ee/Ari_Pereira
https://www.aripereira.com/
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In this episode, Joe and Mick share their experience with being unique, divergent and multidimensional human beings. Mick kicks off the episode by introducing the movie Divergent to kick off the subject. They discuss how at times it seems that our society can label each of us based off of one category of knowledge such as a person’s profession. They explain why it is important for them not to label others or themselves based off of something they do, or a job they have had. They mention how important it is to recognize that all human beings are unique, divergent and multidimensional. They elaborate on the inherent worth of each individual and why they feel it is important to explore, experiment, spend time on hobbies and interests you love and not be so linear or hyper-focused where you may miss the beauty of the entire forest by only looking at one tree. They emphasize how tools such as IKIGIA, which is a Japanese concept that means “purpose for being”, is helpful in bringing awareness to 1. what a person loves, 2. what they are good at, 3. what the world needs, & 4. what they can be paid for. Lastly, they talk about their takeaways from the episode and especially how doing what we love and playing to one’s strengths is less draining and more rewarding.
We would love to hear from the Home For Being community about your experiences with “Being a Unique, Divergent and Multidimensional Human Being”. What has helped you not to put yourself and others in a box? What works best for you in your experience? Is it important for you to spend time exploring and especially doing what you love?
Resources:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Divergent_(film)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ikigai
https://images.app.goo.gl/RxhGbqa9cjTzBzZa8
https://www.betterup.com/blog/what-is-ikigai
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In this episode, Joe and Mick share their experience with learning how much or how little to share with others and what helps them discern how to do this. They discuss how at times in their pasts they have been open books to everyone and how this has not served them well. They explain some tools that help them distinguish how much to share with others and also the level of vulnerability they are comfortable sharing depending on the overall maturity, trust and safety level of the other people they are interacting with. They mention a relationship circle tool that helps them distinguish very close and trusted friends, who are in their inner circle, and those who they need to interact with to some degree on the outer circle who are toxic and everything in the middle. They elaborate on how it is a waste of energy to share too much information with a toxic person or an unsupportive person. They emphasize how it helps to consider the source and the emotional health of the other party as well. Lastly, they talk about how the relationship circle tool helps them maintain effective boundaries to protect themselves from being drained or wasting energy arguing with toxic people.
We would love to hear from the Home For Being community about your experiences with being vulnerable with others and sharing with others. Have you noticed a difference in your energy when dealing with a safe person you trust who respects you verses a more toxic person ? What has helped you make progress? What works best for you in your experience?
Resources:
Here are some different examples of a Relationship Circle Tool
https://www.kirstyocallaghan.com/index.php/seven-circles-relationships
https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&v=aW2xq8Wakzg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eYwzF4K8Pog
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In this episode, Joe and Mick share their experience with responding versus reacting. They discuss how when they react it often comes from their survival mode, egos and coping or defense mechanisms. They explain the value of pausing and taking the time to process your emotions, your needs, and the mental and emotional state of the person you are communicating with especially if you have been triggered. They mention four different ways to communicate: 1. Passive, 2. Passive Aggressive (Sarcastic), 3. Aggressive (Bully) or 4. Assertive (Calm Assertive Leadership). They elaborate on how the goal should always be to respond in an honest, calm assertive manner where you say what you mean but you don’t say it meanly when it’s appropriate. They emphasize that when they respond with vulnerability and assertiveness, it almost always benefits them regardless of the other party’s response. Lastly, they talk about boundaries to protect themselves from toxic people and having compassion for those who are unable to participate in a healthy dialogue that respects both parties human dignity and inherent worth.
We would love to hear from the Home For Being community about your experiences with responding versus reacting. What has helped you make progress? What works best for you in your experience?
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In this episode, Joe and Mick share their experience with the healing benefits of getting in touch with suppressed emotions especially those from childhood that were never adequately felt or processed. They discuss how they both have been able to connect with and heal past wounds allowing the inner-child to fully express themselves. They explain the concept of a “Rotten Fish Letter” and how it is used to give oneself and their inner-child permission to fully and freely process their emotions and feelings. They mention how this tool helped them to get in touch with and release pent up anger that facilitated a deeper healing, forgiveness and compassion for themselves and those who harmed them in the past. Lastly, they discuss how anger tends to be the top onion layer of the emotions, especially for men, which can often mask other emotions that also need to be felt in order to more fully heal.
We would love to hear from the Home For Being community about your experiences with healing and feeling your emotions especially those caused from child hood trauma. What has helped you make progress ? What works best for you in your experience ?
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In this episode, Joe and Mick share their experience with paying attention to balance and rest as essential priorities to being the best version of themselves. They discuss the gifts of rest and different ways of slowing down, resting and maintaining balance. They explain how easy it is in our fast paced culture to get adrenalized into acting like a “human doing machine” and neglect balance and rest which is a way of abandoning ourselves and self care. They mention the importance of taking frequent breaks, under scheduling, checking in with themselves and asking themselves gentle questions such as; what do I truly need right now ? What needs to be adjusted to help me be more balanced ? Lastly, they compare the need to always be aware of balance and rest with a surfers need to always be aware of the movements of each wave and having to make continual adjustments in order to remain balanced.
We would love to hear more from the Home For Being community about your experiences with balance, rest, slowing down and being more mindful. What works best for you in your experience ?
Resources: The Gifts Of Rest https://workaholics-anonymous.org/pdf_files/giftsofrest.pdf
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In this episode, Joe and Mick share about their experience with spirituality and believing in something bigger than themselves. They discuss how their experience and understanding of a higher power has and continues to evolve as more gets revealed over time in their lives. They talk about how they both encountered a “loving” higher power who “cares” for them personally while going through some of the darkest moments of their lives and how it was unexpected. They explain the benefits of having an intimate relationship with a higher power of their own understanding who they both identify as being the source of “unconditional love”. They mention their belief that each person’s spirituality and path should be unique and how a healthy spirituality is completely different than a rigid religion and or any type of constrictive or repressive dogma.
We would love to hear more from the Home for Being community about your experiences with a higher power or spirituality.
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In this episode, Joe and Mick share about the importance of allowing everyone the dignity of their own experience including themselves. They discuss how practicing this is the opposite of codependency and how it provides the necessary time and energy to put the focus on ourselves in a loving and caring way. They talk about how the ego, fear of abandonment, people pleasing, insecurity and thinking we know what’s best for others can easily trap us into wasting energy trying to control other peoples lives and how it always harms us and them whenever we do it. They explain ways that help them make progress not falling for this trap as much such as striving to only share from their own experience and only when it is asked for. Lastly, they mention how important it is to have the freedom to make our own mistakes and to have the opportunity to grow and learn from those mistakes as a path to gaining wisdom.
We would love to hear more from the Home For Being community about your experiences with falling for the traps of trying to control others and what has worked for you to help you allow others the freedom to have the dignity of their own experience.
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In this episode, Joe and Mick share about their experience of connecting to the inner child and why they feel it is an essential part of connecting to their authentic selves. They discuss different ways of connecting with the inner child and the benefits received. They explain how playing, exploring, experimenting, resting, singing, and having fun nourishes their inner child. They mention examples of how they practice reparenting themselves and the inner child as a loving parent and also discuss the critical parent and the inner teenager. They speak about how some repressed feelings, trauma and emotions can emerge when connecting with the inner child and why it’s important to process those. Lastly, they emphasize how setting a specific time aside as much as possible to connect with the inner child can produce wonderful results.
Resources:
Healing Your Lost Inner Child: How to Stop Impulsive Reactions, Set Healthy Boundaries and Embrace an Authentic Life https://a.co/d/bp4wlDP
Self-Therapy: A Step-By-Step Guide to Creating Wholeness and Healing Your Inner Child Using IFS, A New, Cutting-Edge Psychotherapy, 2nd Edition https://a.co/d/f9b2OEA
Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents https://a.co/d/1LFwZSh
The Loving Parent Guidebook: The Solution is to Become Your Own Loving Parent (Softcover, Spiralbound) https://a.co/d/erMkDxa
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In this episode, Joe and Mick share about the gifts of our human emotions and feelings and explore why they are essential in teaching us to live authentic and fulfilling lives. They discuss how: Therapy can help us to look within. Our family dynamics plays a role in how we learn to treat our emotions and feelings. Journaling and connecting with our inner child helps us process our emotions and feelings more fully. Various types of body work help us to release trauma and enable us to feel suppressed emotions. Continuing to learn and experiment with different tools that help us process is essential. Maintaining a consistent practice and finding our own unique way to heal is beneficial.
References:
The Ekman’s Atlas of Emotions: http://atlasofemotions.org/#triggers/disgust
Feelings Wheel: https://feelingswheel.com/
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk M.D.https://a.co/d/bTUPEFS
The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness, and Healing in a Toxic Culture by Gabor Maté MD https://a.co/d/4So1ncJ
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In this episode, Joe and Mick discuss codependency and explore how it harms us as human beings and robs us of a sense of self and our true potential. They discuss: How a lack of boundaries lead to codependency and a loss of a sense of self. How codependency is a way to escape responsibility and our own issues. How emotional dumping on others can be part of the codependent trap. How controlling and manipulating others show up in codependency. How codependency can be used like a drug to numb us from reality. How easy it is to slip into codependency. How the emotion of anger can be a gift that plays a pivotal role in warning us that a boundary has been crossed or that we have moved into a form of codependency. How anger can also help point to the necessary adjustments and changes that we need to implement to take better care of ourselves and maximize our energy so we don’t get depleted or drained by codependency.
References:
Born Only Once, Third Edition: The Miracle of Affirmation by Conrad W. Baars https://a.co/d/bfVNaWH
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In this episode, Mick & Joe discuss the value of gratitude and how powerful it is in opening our eyes to appreciate reality and the present moment. They discuss: How authentic gratitude is not the same as “toxic positivity”. Their experience with practicing gratitude and how it continues to evolve. How being grateful does not mean to suppress what is challenging, negative, disappointing, irritating or frustrating. How they are learning to be grateful especially for negativity and frustrations and how by bringing it to the light they get to make progress facing it, processing it, and allowing it to point to necessary changes, solutions and adjustments that are necessary to be able to continually evolve. How being grateful for the seemingly good, bad and ugly is teaching and guiding them to be more fully their authentic selves.
References:
The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness, and Healing in a Toxic Culture by Gabor Maté MD https://a.co/d/4So1ncJ
Make Miracles in Forty Days: Turning What You Have into What You Want by Melody Beattie https://a.co/d/7fEBBZi
Quote read in podcast:
“Action has meaning only in relationship and without understanding relationship, action on any level will only breed conflict. The understanding of relationship is infinitely more important than the search for any plan of action.” J. KRISHNAMURTI
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In this episode, Joe & Mick dive deep into the importance of discovering, cultivating and maintaining a healthy self worth. They explore their past experience where they both had feelings of having very low self worth at times and also going to the other extreme of being an egomaniac to mask that inferiority. They discuss: How they both have made tremendous progress learning to embrace a realistic and balanced self worth in their lives and why it’s vital in allowing them to live meaningful lives. The tools, techniques, road blocks, obstacles that help them cultivate and maintain a healthy self worth. The importance of continually discovering their own unique authentic self worth including their individual strengths, talents and gifts. How the extremes of low self worth and being an ego maniac are both parts of the false self and not the true self. They talk about the truth in the middle and much more!
References:
Born Only Once, Third Edition: The Miracle of Affirmation by Conrad W. Baars https://a.co/d/bfVNaWH
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Welcome to a Home for Being, created by Mick Hendrikx and Joe Raphael. Our podcast navigates the dynamics, challenges and joys involved with being a unique, evolving, human being in a world that is constantly trying to make us into something we are not. Every week, we have raw and unfiltered conversations where we share our experience, triggers and lessons learned to explore with you the best way we all can live an authentic and fulfilling life. Together, as a supportive community, we encourage each other to tap into our own loving source and grow our self-awareness to become who we really are. That is a gift that each of us gets to share with the worldin co-creatinga more authentic, empathetic and connected existence. Welcome Home; your Home for Being. Subscribe to our YouTube channel to tune in and connect with us. New episodes dropped every Sunday at 9 AM PST.
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