The Darn Diaries: Recent Episodes
Darnell Setiadi
I've been an introvert my whole life, never in 21 years have I ever thought I would be doing this, but here we are. I used to be the silent guy in the room, but allow me to change that narrative.
Keeping it as real, raw, and unfiltered as I possibly can with my take and perspective in my personal life, school, relationships, and so on.
I hope at least one of you can take away something out of this ongoing project and remember, it's merely perspective, nothing personal. Cheers!
Annd we're back!
If there's one thing the last few months, including my mom coming over, getting rejected yet again after 2 good interviews, it's perseverance. Yes, it may be seemingly impossible to look at the bright side, but trust me, just keep going and you'll be alright.
Annnd we're back! If anything, the past few months of being away from keyboard taught me perseverance. My mom came over and I got rejected for being overqualified, and for some reason, the two events taught me so much more than I thought. It truly is all about perspective, so I hope it helps in a small way, at least.
I ran a marathon. What are the odds of us getting here? What started off as a boredom killer turned into a way of life that taught me more than any other sport - that's the beauty of endurance. If there's one thing it taught me, it was grit. The mindset you set for yourself at the get-go is everything, and this ain't just about running.
Change is never comfortable, but it's what pushes us forward for the better, whether we like it or not. I pretty much sailed through college by being structured, but later I realised that life doesn't always align with your set schedule, as things unexpectedly come up. It's about finding that delicate balance of being structured and agile.
Every year I add another number to myself, I made a pact to do a self-reflection and assessment of pivoting moments that led me to who I am today. We mustn't forget the seemingly small victories nor the bitter defeats we had to overcome. Perseverance is never easy, but it's necessary.
When someone close corrects you or gives you feedback, we tend to be on guard instinctively as our pride is being compromised. But as you mature, you start to realize the importance of taking a step back and realizing the true intention behind what they said - to build you up for the better, not to belittle you.
Sure, discipline and consistency will get you going, but knowing where you're going and why is more important than not. Whether it be your career choice, studies or personal relationships, every decision counts, so think and choose wisely.
Getting up early is hard, talking to strangers is intimidating, and training for a marathon is excruciating, but to achieve something great requires sacrificing what's good and comfortable. You don't have to do a TED talk on the get-go but learn in bits by saying, "Have a good one", or giving a compliment to a stranger. It starts from the small steps.
The higher you fly, the harder the fall. Whether it be in your career, studies, love life, or social circle, it's all about managing expecations. At the end of it all, if they truly value you, they'll make the effort and time, otherwise, they were never meant to be in your life in the long run.
Almost a year ago, I never thought I could reach peak performance in my runs, nor did I ever think of signing up for a marathon, but here we are. A scrapped knee, a broken leg, and a burst appendix only made me wiser, faster and stronger. Time and time again, your body proves itself stubborn against illnesses, and injuries, as you only get better, so I wonder why we can't transcend that into other life facets.
The moment you throw your ego aside, you learn so much about yourself. Listening to my body and my mind has become something I take more seriously, especially after I got appendicitis and suffered multiple mental burnouts when I worked and studied at the same time.
To get from point A to point B, you need to view it in 2 ways: the macro (destination) and the micro (how you get there). If you tend to jump into the micro, you tend to get lost and lose emotional regulation quickly, but viewing the macro first before planning out the micro can get you to far places without worry or stress.
The three most important resources you'll ever have are time, energy, and money. Where you go and how you get there depend on those three resources, which emphasizes the importance of ensuring you utilize them wisely and with proper and thoughtful intent, whether in school, work, or even your love life.
Every first child is no stranger to the word sacrifice. We're the first ones to receive stricter scoldings for misbehaving, to give up the last piece of BBQ skewer so our younger sibling can have it, and to face the world head-on to protect our younger siblings. On the one hand, this makes us independent, but on the other, it makes it hard to overcome our pride and ask for help when needed. Though it's hard to admit you're struggling, sometimes, that's when you realize you just need a little nudge to push on.
There's the suffering we were given, and then there's the suffering we choose. And there's something about chosen suffering and discomfort that can either shape or break you. Believe it or not, this struggle in the job hunt, redefining who I am and training for a marathon taught me much more than I thought.
I know I'm not the only one going through this, and I know that you know that it doesn't get easier. The sheer amount of idle time led me to reflect on how I could make the most out of this time that I was given. It took me a whole year to arrive at this conclusion, so I hope it doesn't have to be for you.
The mind is a double-edged sword; it either refines or destroys. Reflecting on 2024, many of the challenges I went through were mental battles, so I hope you take the time to ask yourself what you did right and wrong and how you will proceed moving forward. Cheers to 2025!
"A lot can change in a year," they say, and boy, were they right. From almost being at risk of being deported, appendicitis, a half marathon, getting two dates, and getting serious into my life of faith, has been a crazy series of unexpected events. If you can, I encourage you to take the time to reflect on key events, what you learnt, and how you can improve as the new year approaches. See ya in 2025!
It takes time to be emotionally mature and secure enough to know where you stand and what or who you truly deserve, even if it means walking away from something good. I had to let go of my second date as I knew I wasn't the one for her, nor was I the one for her (for privacy reasons, I will not disclose why). She was a great woman, and I truly wish the best for her in life, the fact that I had to make a podcast episode out of this just goes to show how great of a person she is, but at the same time, I have to do what's best for me.
To achieve any endeavour, one requires a plan to increase the odds of completing it. But planning alone just won't cut it. You need the why to keep going on the toughest days and discipline to hold yourself accountable.
If I could go back in time and meet 18-year-old me, I'd tell him just the three pieces of advice I've held onto that's helped me through the toughest challenges I've gone through.
Dedicated to the curious ones. It's interesting how all the lessons I learnt from the failed talking stages, situationships, dates, and even a relationship helped define my current dating standards. If there's one thing you can take away, it's this: Never settle for anything less than you deserve.
Not everything will go according to plan, and such is life. If you're job hunting like I am, you know the market has been relentless and unforgiving.
But instead of focusing too much on the things you can't control, why not save time, energy and effort on the things you can control to turn your life around for the better eventually? Easier said than done, I know, but the moment you accept the uncontrollable is when you start taking control.
Time changes, people. As you grow older, you realize not everyone was meant to stay, and it may very well be a harsh reality to accept, especially if they're your family or close friends. But time stops for no one, and I know it's hard, but sometimes you have to let go of the old to make room for the new, better things and people to enter your life.
You know how any Netflix series starts with a slow build-up in the first few episodes before dropping the jaw-dropping episode that hooked us to the end? Picture that on repeat, and that pretty much sums up life. Looking back at my running journey and building this podcast gives perspective on how the dynamics have to change to get you onto the next stage of growth and why it was necessary.
"It's just running; it's not that deep," they say. Tell them to train, run a half marathon, and see how their minds change. Running my first half marathon was a privilege I will never take for granted. It's crazy how a year ago I could barely run 3 km and how four months ago I was hospitalized for appendicitis and somehow ran a sub 1:42 half marathon last weekend. Running is more than you think; it's what teaches you to just keep at it.
Everyone's always chasing something, but not everyone sees the end of it. To go any distance, you need to find the core reason why you want to go from the get-go; that's how you build consistency regardless of the days when you don't feel like it. So be the one who keeps at it to the end.
"When we plan, God laughs." This pretty much sums up the near-ending year. Though planning helps create direction, you won't always be on the ideal path; there will be twists and turns, but maybe there's a reason.
We all face a make-or-break point in whatever facet of life. The question is, can you go one more and see through the obstacle before you and persevere to the end?
It's funny how we often get so caught up in life that we forget we're living and doing the life we always envisioned in the past. So take the time to savour these moments every once in a while :)
I've heard it all. "Do you have a girlfriend yet? How are you still single? Do you even have rizz?" I took my time, and honestly, I'm glad I did.
Re-syncing
- Finishing school, job hunting, and freelancing create flexibility, but they also lack the structure you're used to, especially if you're a planner like me. Sometimes, we have to go back to our roots.
Utilizing time
- Instead of beating yourself up for feeling unproductive during your idle time, ask yourself? Is there anything I can do today that will help me tomorrow?
Just ask
- No dating tips this time, sorry. But when it comes to getting a job rejection, there's always something you can learn from them, lessons you can learn only if you ask the right questions with the right attitude.
What started as a 25k ended as a 28k run (my longest run to date). It's crazy how surrounding yourself with those better than you can take you higher than you thought.
It's always easier said than done, especially when it's the thing you committed to do. It takes a strong why and a pinch of insanity to do the seemingly impossible. But know this: the only limit you have is your mind.
"Yesterday was history. Tomorrow is the mystery, but today? Today is a gift; that's why it's called the present." If there's one thing you can take away, it's Master Oogway's quote right here. Hope it helps :) (Sorry for the long wait, I explained here)
People need people. No matter how independent one might think he/she is, we're all wired as social beings. So, as hard as it may be to accept, the sooner you embrace this, the sooner you start to see your life change.
A blip of how non-linear post-appendectomy recovery can be and a simple tweak that upped my work productivity. Hope it helps!
It's hard. I'll give you that. But for the time being, while you have all the time in the world, use it to your advantage and find something you enjoy doing on the side. Think of it as a side, personal project.
Everything is a choice. It's amazing how malleable yet rigid your brain can be once you switch from an innate desire to change for the better. I used to struggle with practising self-control until I learnt my personal way of having better control of it, which is my faith. I'm not asking anyone to convert, but I do ask that we be open-minded and learn from each other, regardless of our cultural diversity, religion/no religion, etc.
We grew up living with our parents, thinking we have all the time in the world with them, which we take for granted until we go off to college. They're getting older, and one day, they'll reach a point where they may not even talk to or remember you, so before that happens, please spend time with them while you still can. And remember, if it matters, you'll make the time.
Romance seems to be a popular topic here ( I wonder why), so here's one for you. If there's one takeaway from this episode, it's this: Find someone who makes you feel like your you -est you possible.
All it takes is one drop to tip off the scale. We're all busy, I get it, but that's when we have to be most careful - that is, questioning whether our "balance" is truly balanced.
(P.s. I apologize for the muffled audio on this one, hope you can still listen.)
I had it all wrong. My physical, spiritual, mental and emotional well-being, that is. Although I was heading in a somewhat right direction, I was slowly misaligning myself from the path I was supposed to take, and I didn't realize that until appendicitis did that for me, or in this case, God.
Notice the people who stuck by you when you're rebuilding yourself; those are the ones you should keep close to. Not everyone is meant to stay, and it's hard to accept at first, but once you do, it feels like a breath of fresh air.
I may have almost died. That's why I've been off the grid for the last week. I got perforated appendicitis, and it was BAD when the doctors thankfully got to remove it in time before it got much worse!
If you're into health and wellness, listen to this. Cheers, and I hope it helps!
Firstly, I apologize for the absence in the last 2 weeks. I had surgery for perforated appendicitis and had a long recovery to go through and still am, frankly. But anyways, I recorded this just before my appendix ruptured so hopefully that means sth lol. Enjoy :)
It's crazy how you can make your body adjust to your state of mind. If you told me to run a half marathon while weight training 9 months ago, I'd tell you: "No chance. You're crazy."
Long story short, I ran my first unofficial half-marathon a month ago, another three after, and, in about two months, my first official half-marathon race.
Key takeaway: You can do anything you set your mind and heart to, no matter how challenging.
Personal Project Realities
It's hard AF. School teaches you how to be disciplined, bounding you to grades and academic progress toward graduation, but when you're on your own? You're only bound by the rules and systems you create for yourself.
Screw Stress
The best way to kill stress is simply by taking action. There's no point in ruminating or overthinking what could've been or should've been; instead, focus on the step ahead of you and move forward.
Life Update
Listen to the end to find out about my love life and my big announcement.
This episode is a tribute to my late grandparents from both sides. They were a big part of my life, and I will forever be grateful to have been raised by them.
They taught me more than they'll ever know, and I hope they know how proud I was and still am of knowing and being loved by four beautiful souls.
Popoh, Kung Kung, Ema, and Engkong, this one's for you.
Double F***
I was not only humbled once but twice: first by my potential job and second by my could've-been-date (not her fault, though).
Keep Swinging
All we need is one homerun, one perfect swing, to send it all the way. The problem is, not everyone swings until they hit a home run.
Dating Standards
I've kept mine pretty high since my last relationship and there's a reason why I never compromised on it. (Also me: Crying to Ghostown by Benson Boone for the past 6 Valentine's days).
Mini Update
I recently caught the flu, so pardon my voice, but otherwise, I am still in the job hunt despite having a few interviews in my pocket.
Dating Life Revived
It's been almost six years since I last dated, until this coming Saturday. She seems nice, but we'll see where it goes.
Discussing Dating Strategy
You're in for a treat on this one. I learned a few things from my past relationship and talking stage that I hope you don't have to learn the hard way and how I'm approaching dating now.
Planning Mechanisms
"When a man/woman plans, God laughs." We can't always foresee every outcome's success, but we can always prepare and plan for the ideal and worst-case scenarios. Once you have, just run the plan and stick to it, and suddenly, you're in control.
It Works Out Eventually
It's a series of ups and downs, but somehow, everything seemingly pieces together in the end. There's a saying that goes: Everything's gonna be okay in the end; if it's not okay, then it's not the end.
Live a Little
I spent a lot of time on the grind that I'd forget to enjoy my time with myself, family, and friends who stuck by me through thick and thin. Work and school shouldn't define your life (though they are important), so get out there and do what you love.
I'm officially on month 2 of the job search and have received a handful of rejections, and a phone interview call-up that led to a final interview this coming Thursday (LFG!)
It's easy to get easily swayed by rejections but I was reminded of a past lesson that got me an unforgettable co-op job that I now rave about.
Finder's Keepers
As you grow up, you'll realize that some people are meant to be background characters, while others become the side, loyal characters to this day. We call them lovers, family, and friends.
Make the Time
As a college student, I was so caught up with my studies, personal projects, and side hustle that I'd often turn down hangouts with friends, calls from my family, and probably a chance to meet my future gf (who knows). I wish I could turn back time and done some things differently, so I hope you don't go down the same rabbit hole as I did.
Never Forget Them
To this day, I still have no clue how I met my social circle, whom I'm proud to call friends (especially when you're an introvert). How suddenly, this random kid became someone I could bounce around ideas with and sit in the mud with through my darkest times. You can't put a price on that.
Creating Thyself
Life post-college is strange. There's no manual or handbook, just pieces of knowledge, skills, and intuition of what and who you want to be. The data is raw; you have the methodologies, but you must draw hypotheses, experiment, and finish your experiments. The best part? You can choose whatever that experiment looks like.
Enjoy & Share
What a privilege it is to have a circle of friends and family you can share this life with, through thick and thin, rain or shine.
(PSA: I apologize for the occasional coughs, I was recovering from a cold at the time of this recording)
I was finishing up a novel at the local bookstore I went to on Sundays and came across a kind stranger who struck up a conversation with me. He worked in digital marketing (specifically in sales and lead acquisitions), and we talked for a good 30 minutes or so (a nice fella). Here are some takeaways on networking the proper way:
- Get them in a one-on-one setting (gatherings or events can be distracting)
- It's a hit-and-miss (but you will always gain sth out of everyone, even if they don't end up meeting you again for coffee)
- Make it convenient for them (they're busy, make it easy for them)
- Be prepared (and intentional when asking questions)
Perfect form
As perfectionists, we tend always to want to be at our best at the best moment to produce the best outcome. But in reality, perfection often comes as imperfection (a cliche, I know). It's a lot like how two right-angled triangles meet and form a rectangle. It's not the same as a sole rectangle, but it's just as beautiful.
Endurance
Play the long game, whether it be in running, personal projects, or whatever endeavor you're doing. Remember the macro, and don't succumb to micro failures.
It's out there
For the first few weeks of post-grad life, I was a hermit until I decided to go out more often. This is where the magic lies, where what seems mundane to others becomes a narrated novel of a reality. Who knows what kind of plot you'll be twisting yourself into?
Systemizing Success
Nick Bare once said: "If you fail to plan, you plan to fail." I have a project management tool called Notion, and oh my gosh, it has saved my life. (Unsponsored, sadly)
Playing Off-Position
Every decision on prospects involves risk. The question is: How do you manage risk effectively, and when do you play the trump card?
Micro Progression
We often underestimate the power of small and seemingly insignificant steps, not knowing that it is these steps that are often pivoting points toward progression.
Cherishing Glory
Sometimes, we forget how far we've come when we've been so stuck up on our current hurdles. I'm currently on a mission to get employed and went through some of my past work, and boy, did I create some amazing pieces. Cherish your glory days, but never dwell.
Clean Slate
When a new season or challenge arises, always start off with a clean slate mentality. Appreciate your past wins, but always set your mind to building the new foundation you need for the unchartered territory ahead.
De-loading
I was a maniac back then, taking five courses while working two part-time jobs and running this podcast. It showed me how capable I was, but more importantly, my limits.
The Block
It truly is a taxing task to ideate, script, produce, edit, and publish content with your purpose or vision as the intention of each piece. But that's where intentionality can become the anchor to get you to stick through it anyway.
Career Prospects
I am finally clear to apply for jobs now. I recently stumbled across a few job openings in communications and got a little sauce for those who may be interested in this field based on my past experience.
Self-Systemizing
School teaches you to discipline yourself by providing you with a system for completing tasks and exams. Post-grad is teaching me to create that system for myself to stay disciplined outside the academic context, and this is where you lay the foundation.
Adapting to Novelty
It's been pretty rough the past few days, but I know these times are often the most necessary to prepare you for what is to come. It's hard to be unproductively productive, but I guess we all need a break at some point, right?
Job x Identity
Nothing against the people I've met and known, but I realize whenever you introduce yourself, the norm is always a) Name and b) What do you do? What if we introduced ourselves in another way?
Get Outside
I've admittedly been a hermit for the past 5 days until I decided to go out a full day on Sunday and boy, it was much needed. It's crazy how changing the whole scenery creates a new angle on how you perceive ideas.
*Message to Future Me: A Follower-Exclusive Series
I sat on New Year's Day and wrote these 3 words for 2024: Just Show Up. There will be lows, hardships, heartbreak, or all of the above at once, but if you just keep at it, and keep showing up despite the circumstances, you start seeing the light at the end of the tunnel you might be in.
Grad Jitters
I've waited five long years for this moment, but now that it is, it's a weird feeling from having a semester to look forward to every quarter to none at all anymore.
Maintaining momentum
College taught structure and workflow, so I'd be a fool if I didn't carry this on to my next chapter.
Balance defined
A subjective term. That's what it is. What it means to person A may be disagreed by person B.
It's Official
Your boy's officially done with college (woohoo!)
Remember this
There's one thing that my teachers and instructors tell me from time to time, as I'm sure most of you have, that I now truly understand what they were saying.
*Message to Future Me: A Follower-Exclusive Series
De-exaggerating
- We often overestimate the problem when, really, it's not as bad as you think it is until you've resolved it. One step at a time.
The Life update
- A sneak peek to future projects
- Pre-college-ending feels
- A major college takeaway that I would do if I could do it all over again
Chapter closure
As my academic campaign comes to an end, it's bittersweet after reflecting on how far you've come, and I can safely say I have no regrets taking my business degree.
The Climb 2
To every mountain peak and its glorious beauty, there lies the climb it took to get there. And this is where it will mold you.
Cherish it
You will never truly realize the value of something until it is lost, and I know I've said this before but I'll say it again: Cherish these moments.
*Message to Future Me - A Followers Exclusive Series
Thank you
- To each and every single one of you for tuning in. You're the reason why I kept going, and I wish you nothing but the best in whatever life stage you're in :)
Deciding Factor
- Even the world's best analyst will have to make a decision; no matter how perfect you want a decision to be, it's just not realistically feasible. Whatever you decide, even if it isn't the best one - can very well lead you to the best outcome.
Executive Advice
- The one piece of advice I got from my supervisor/associate director from my last job that I carry on to this day and allow me to share it with you.
Get it overwith
The magic you're looking for is in the work you're avoiding (cr: Modern Wisdom). I'll leave it there.
Going hybrid
A few episodes back, I decided to try out this hybrid athlete thing - lift heavy while being able to run like a gazelle. It was hard, but damn was it worth it.
Exploration
Being an avid runner now opens the option to explore the city I reside in, some routes are beautiful, some are fun, while others are not. But you wouldn't have known that if you didn't wander aimfully.
*Message to Future Me - A Followers Exclusive Series
The Lonely Game
- At some point, you'll reach the stage where you're doing a set of tasks, endeavors, and pursuits that no one else is. And it gets lonely, but how do you define lonely(?)
Max Effort
- Sometimes, overcommitting to things gets you to places you never knew were possible to reach.
Questioning Faith
- I was born a Christian, but I'm not here to shove my values on everyone listening. I'm here to share how and why I've been wrestling with mine. Even if you're not religious, I hope you can learn a thing or two from this segment.
Before you come rampaging at me, hear me out. I went over:
- Why Darnell disappeared in thin air
- Why you can't be your "best self"
- How to NOT crash and burn - 2 simple tips
Enjoy! And I'm glad we're back :)
If you like what you heard, rate it or hit the follow so you won't miss a beat. Cheers!
(BONUS: Sneak peak to my upcoming newsletter content)
At some point, we all get lost in search of what and who we truly want to be. Life gets in the way, but, like all of us, we figure it out (somehow), and that’s the beauty of it. Think of all the problems you resolved through, ever wondered how capable you actually were and are? Me neither.
I heard a saying that goes: “None of us are ever on the same journey.” Everyone is on a different trek, but we can share the same state or at least some parts of it. So here’s mine.
There's that cliche that goes: "You never meet people in your life by accident." And I can now attest to that. I tend to be a very picky person when it comes to who I let into my social circle; some may argue it's good, while others, not so much. But, it has led me to the right, and genuine people - after all, it is the quality of friends that matters. So, I hope you find those people.
There's a saying that goes: "Take your time, but don't waste your time." While everything around us may be hassling here and there, find your center before making those moves.
Much of what we are already capable of often goes unnoticed until you take on a challenging course that you end up doing well at (that was me).
People may have varied opinions when it comes to the necessity of college, but there's something about the routine and workflow college teaches you that's, well, applicable.
One of the hardest things in life is parting ways to people you once were close to. Not that it’s anyone’s fault, it’s just life taking you to different paths, and that’s okay. But the right ones, those who were meant for you, will stay.
You won’t ever be fully ready to take on every single challenge in school/work/life, sometimes, like most of us, you just have to figure it out somehow. It’s scary, but that’s what growing up feels like.
No one truly prepares you for what comes next after overcoming your greatest hurdle or toughest mountain you've ever had to climb. It begs the question: "Where do we go from here?" and "How do we approach the unknown?"
Delays
- There's a good chance I might've gotten COVID again but am recovering quicker than expected. You feel like a nuisance when you're not at your 100% but there's always a lesson out of it.
Life update
- Listen and find out ;)
Evolving capabilities (min 0)
- I've always shied away from tough courses, especially when it involved memorizing a ridiculous amount of terms until I chose to take kinesiology. I regretted it at first, but as I went through it week after week, I gained more than I thought I would.
Becoming an Academic Weapon (min 2)
- The secret to doing well or at least applying the things you learn that you can utilize in everyday life.
Treading Lightly (min 6)
- I may have gotten covid for the second time (woohoo), and I think one thing I learned from the first time was to listen to my body and be more caring towards yourself, something I struggle with sometimes.
Meaning
- It's ironic how even the word meaningless has, in fact, a meaning, and I think in life, there's a reason for that, and you get to decide how you choose to define it: A stepping stone or a comfort zone.
Habits
- Behind every successful man/woman lies this thing called consistency of repeated action that we know as habits. The goal is to make the good ones easy and the bad ones hard.
Winning the majority
- In life, we're often faced with trying circumstances, and at times, the bad coping mechanisms kick in instead of the healthy ones, but it's always important to know that you don't have to be perfect all the time. Just choose more of the good than bad.
I mean it's pretty self-explanatory there if you think about it. Jk.
- I think burning out teaches you a multitude of things: Understand your capacity, your self-regulation mechanisms, and how + when to unwind and recharge.
- It's an iterative process which comes with consistent trials-and-error runs until you hit a better sweet spot each time.
Worth the wait
- Whether it be a long-waited vacation back to your hometown or meeting your significant other, there's always a reason why you were meant to be put on hold. It's usually during those waiting times where growth occurs the most because I know I did (not the relationship part - yet).
Letting go
- If you have a knack for planning and anticipating, I think we should be friends HAHAH. But, there are some things in life that are beyond our control, and learning to let go is both the hardest yet most liberating thing you will ever experience. Don't sweat the small stuff, and control the controllables.
Down memory lane
- You never know what you had until it's gone. I remember I had my last dinner as a complete family with my late dad, and he told me the one thing that stuck with me to this day. I hope I can raise a family of my own to be just like his, just like mine right now.
Taking on a capstone
- For any busines student out there, you know how important the capstone course is. Essentially, you'll be acting consultants with a team to help assess and offer strategic advice to a real business client. It's an interesting blend between academics and actual work, which I am slowly starting to enjoy (oddly).
Handling overworking
- I've always been a let's-get-this-done kind of guy and despise delaying major work, and love controlling the controllables. There's just something about getting things done that brings peace to the soul (it's probably just me), but when taken too far, it'll do no good. Believe this hard-headed burnout enthusiast.
Pursuit of struggle
- I don't know what it was, but ever since I first took 5 courses in a single semester, I got invested in challenging my capacity and capabilities. Physiologically, our bodies were built to grow against gravity (sth I learned in my Kinesiology course), so challenge yourself. Trust me, it's worth it.
W/L Balance
- I'm probably the worst person to ask advice from when it comes to actually following through with balancing work and life. When you find sth you enjoy doing, it can be hard to stop yourself from going 110%, but sometimes, resetting helps clear the mind. It's still a learning curve from me, so here's how I see it.
Body-Listening
- Your body is a highly complex, coordinated, and magnificent system, and at times, we tend to take its capabilities for granted. There's a reason why you might ache a bit after sitting for too long, or your eyes get watery after a long essay-writing session. Your body needs a break or a stretch! Learning how to listen to your body is the best way to optimize how you function in your day to day.
Getting past the discomfort
- I started running recently, attempting to become a hybrid athlete with the goal of being jacked while still being able to have the endurance to not sound like a wheezing machine every mile I run. I've always loved how alive I felt during runs, but weightlifting makes me feel confident and disciplined, so how do I do both?
Closing chapters
- Every season is beautiful in its own way, some more of a breeze, while others can shake up your roots to strengthen your mental, emotional, and physical stance. You might be in a phase in life where you're moving away from the academic scene; I know I am.
Never forget
- Never forget the first person who took a chance on you when no one else would. My former employer did just that at the last minute of my job search after getting rejected 10 times. including 2 interviews prior to that. I thank her for the opportunity that brought me to where I am today.
Why life gets hard
- I recently took a kinesiology class, and my instructor mentioned something about how our body was meant to resist gravity and grow from it as a result. We were made for challenges and will, one way or the other, thrive from it.
Clean-slate mentality
- Whenever you come into a new project or work with a new client, you need to let go of the past results. Yes, they will help you hone your fundamental skills, but it requires a from-scratch approach to optimize your results. Trust me. I learned this the hard way when I lost clients in the past for repeating a content writing style.
Leading project teams
- I've taken on the role a handful of times. Some were good teams, some were not-so-good teams, and then there were the great ones. But regardless of the teams, as a leader, you carry the responsibility to strive to get others on the same page, reach their potential, and of course, truly deserve the outcome we get. I've had the privilege to work with my current capstone project team, and it is a lot on the line, but I know we'll do great.
Through uncertainties
- It's easy to get carried away in a sea of thoughts when you have no control over the outcome, but I later learned how to weather through one storm at a time, knowing I'll make it out alive. So here's a snippet of what I'm doing amidst all the stress and anxiety that comes and goes like waves.
This shall pass
- Time doesn't stop for anything, and that includes both good times and bad times. In the bad times, learn from them; and in the good times; cherish them.
Before you choose
- In life, we are often presented with near-to-impossible-level hard choices, but it's those moments that dictate who you will become. Some say you are the sum of all the choices you made, so make sure you choose accordingly.
Top tips for straight A's
- I've had over 5 years of trial and error to land the best grades every semester while still managing to work my day job and a side gig as a content writer. Recently, my grades have shot through the roof, and it's been a sustainable pattern, so here are 3 tips to ace your semester!
The Clean Slate Mentality
- When a semester ends, another one begins (until it's your last, that is). I used to worry if I'd be able to replicate the ups and prevent the downs, but this mindset has helped me to stay focused on what lies ahead, which produced an arguably balanced life. If you're working and studying, this is what I think you need to have.
I started lifting when I was about 18, a skinny, 106 lbs (48 kg), clueless teen. Today, I'm in a lot more decent shape with muscle built over the years. I am now standing at 152 lbs (69kg), with more confidence in how I look, talk, and act, but that's not always the case.
Deep down, I'm still that same skinny 18-year-old kid with all his insecurities and self-doubts, but I somehow manage to push through every time. Here's a snippet of that and a rationale for why you should start. Enjoy!
Thank you
- To every single one of you who tuned in and follow this podcast. You have no idea how much this means to me, and I hope you get a thing or two out of these late-night skedaddles and talks.
Making hard choices
- There's that saying that goes: "Hard choices create an easy life. Easy choices create a hard life." I never truly understood until I lived through it, so here's a snippet of that experience.
Adulting Scaries
- I'm in my final year and final term as a co-op student, and as bittersweet as it is, I'm also excited for whatever comes next: A new job, new colleagues, new adventures, a new gf (hopefully), and a new tax bracket (amen). It's daunting, I know, but isn't that the thrill in life we seek?
It all works out in the end
- I felt gutted when my co-op instructor told me I was going to be soon replaced as soon as my term was over, which got me thinking of sending out resumes, practicing for interviews, and adjusting to a new job role. But one thing kept me calm and centered amidst all this.
Leveraging anxiety
- There are 2 driving factors to help anyone succeed in life: Fear of being a failure and An overarching life goal. I've always had the second one, no problem, but recently, I think I might have created the first one to my advantage. Here's how to leverage that.
Job detachment
- Oftentimes, when we've been on a job for so long, or at least for me, we tend to mold it into our identity that the thought of it having it taken away would mean losing a part of who we are. But that doesn't have to be the case, so here's my take on how to disassociate yourself from your job.
Climbing Everest
- There's a saying that goes: "it always seems impossible until it's done," and I just lived through it and will continue to live through more of it in the future. Here's how I think you can best navigate it.
The Struggle to Potential
- Reaching your potential comes with risks, like burnout and getting high on life as you sing terribly in the shower, but it's necessary to get the most out of what you're truly capable of. You never truly get setbacks in life, only lessons to fuel that growth curve. Here's my take.
Making Peace with Your Past
- I can't be at peace without knowing I've made amends with those whom I may have hurt in the past or have unresolved issues with, so I set things straight with them. Yes, it's hard, intimidating and may not be worth the effort at first, but trust me, it's the liberation you'll get out of it that lifts that weight off so you can sprint off onto better things and people. Trust me.
Relationships & Overthinking
- If you're a thinker like me when we both know it's a blessing and a curse at the same time. When we think too much, we get anxious. When we think too little, we feel unproductive and mildly depressed for a moment. So this was my take on it and how I got the best of myself.
Cutting back and social media
- I cannot stress enough how interrelated this is with relationships and overthinking. Don't get me wrong, social media is useful and beautiful in its own way, but sometimes it's hard to realize how much is too much. I found out the hard way, so you don't have to. Most people mean well, but sometimes the best advice is your own advice, from your experiences, morals, and sometimes things other people have told you along the way. Here's my take.
Appreciate the mundane
- I've always had the same routine for the past two years, from when I wake up, eat, sleep, workout, and read to the point where I learn to enjoy being on "cruise" mode. It's easy to get caught off guard by the unexpected in life, but when you have a system in place, it helps you navigate through them better and restabilize yourself.
Pinpointing root problems
- If you know me well enough, you know how much I love to analyze, which can also be a double-edged sword if you ask me. But of all the times I've used it, whether, in exams or projects, this helped me when I needed it the most in my personal life. Hope it helps.
Attention span fix
- Social media does serve us well in terms of sharing insights, expressing oneself, and connecting with like-minded people, but when done too much, it can be draining. Here's why I'm cutting back from social media.
March Madness really fulfilled the lengths of its definition for me as I took on projects, exams, and a major client order in one go. In reaching my breaking point, these were some of the lessons I learned to utilize that experience to be better armed against future, complex challenges we all will inevitably take on. Cheers, and see ya in the next episode!
Setting the tone
- Getting up early and working out early have been two of the greatest trajectory shifts I've had in my daily routine. It taught me how to slowly understand the true meaning of staying present in what you're doing and doing what you have to when the time you've set for it comes.
Overcoming overthinking
- Like many of you, I've struggled with overthinking, especially when it comes to optimizing all my work from my Tiktok vids, my day job, and my personal relationships. I've always had values or mechanisms, if you will, deeply engrained, but sometimes it can be hard to follow through with your own advice. Ironic, eh?
Mini life update
- For political reasons, it's best if you listen to it. Enjoy.
It's been a hot minute, but I figured it was time to release some of my unreleased drafts. Amidst all the projects, life, and taxes, I got lost in the moment, and this was exactly what I needed (yes, a recording I did last year). Hope it helps.
Just a heads up, my voice may sound sexier than usual so please do not be alarmed :p Jokes aside, it took so much more effort to post this but to whoever may be going through the same thing, I hope this helps.
On this WeeklySnips episode, I was kind of going through an uncomfortable shift in my life where I was worried about what will happen in the future, but I was reminded of this quote that led to my eureka moment and I haven't looked back ever since. Hope this helps.
2020 was challenging, especially for my family and me, as we struggled financially and lost those we hold dear to the pandemic. When I spiraled out of control and hit rock bottom, I had two choices: stay down or get back up, and I think we both know which option I chose.
And yes, I, too, developed bad habits in the past that included watching p*rn, and it's not something that I'm proud of, but thankfully, I was able to conquer my addiction and regain my confidence and most authentic self back with the support I had as I battled through it. It took a lot of thinking about whether to publish this and as much as I didn't want to, I knew that I had to. I hope this helps.
My brother and I were casually having a conversation and along the lines of our chat, we came down to the question: "What's the f*cking point?" And I decided to have a go at this and turned my voice memo into an episode. I hope it helps and to my friend, Davly, I'm sorry lol.
When climbing to the top, it's easy to get carried away and lose yourself amidst all the stairs and hurdles you went through. I think talking to yourself like you would to a friend helps a LOT. This episode helped me re-center myself and remember why I'm doing what I'm doing today. I hope you can take a thing or two out of this deep-talk sesh and that it can help you no matter how little.
And to all my three loyal listeners, I don't know who you are, but thank you :')
For those of you who don't know, I recently got a job offer as an IT Communications Coop. It's my first (ever) 9-5 job, and I thought I'd just share how I got here and what it feels like. Enjoy!
I was feeling a little anxious about my second job interview, considering I failed my first, so I decided to speak my mind out before the big day. I turned out to do well in that interview and got the job I wanted as an IT communications co-op! Hope you learn a thing or two, enjoy!
Sometimes, you're all you've got, and sometimes, that's all you'll ever need. Here's my debut episode of my new WeeklySnips series.
WeeklySnips is the more weekly diary kind of feel and much more compressed (considering that I'm now working). I hope I can keep this up, but here goes nothing.
Hope you enjoy!
Alright, hello, and welcome to season 2! It's been a roller coaster in my personal life, and I had to step aside from podcasting. But, after months and months of work and school, I finally have something cooked just for ya. As 2021 comes to an end, I think self-reflection is key to help set yourself up towards growth, and that's what today's episode is all about. Here's a quick rundown:
Topics:
- How to become an overnight success
2. One is all you need
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The one thing you need to be successful in anything in life
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You're either the chosen few or the trailblazer
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The goal is to disappear, not to be seen.
And as always, thanks for tuning in, and I hope you take a thing or two out of your listen. Cheers!
On this last episode of the season, I'd like to personally thank each and every single one of you for tuning in (no matter how brief), it means the world to me. It's been quite the journey, and I'm glad to have you alongside me from A to Z.
This final episode will be touching on our world's flawed rewarding system, second chances, life and how you play it, hard work + intentions.
I hope anyone listening to this pod can gain a thing or two and put it to good use (I hope), and as always, thanks for tuning in!
Cheers,
DES
As the season comes to an end, let me say thank you to every one of you for tuning in despite your hustling and bustling lives. This will be part 1 of the season finale (don't cry) as I don't want anyone to listen to my boring ass voice for a whole hour.
In this week's episode, I'll be highlighting how to screw a common enemy we all know as Procrastination, the relationship between money & intentions, and how the future is compounding interest (I'm no business guru, just so you know).
I hope y'all enjoy it, and once again, thanks for listening! And stay tuned for part 2 (aka the grand finale)!
The title pretty much speaks for itself on what this week's episode covers. Quick backstory: I started my venturing back in August 2020, made myself a good routine but oftentimes, I neglect the fact that it was meant to be evolved not maintained.
Hope you enjoy and as always, thanks for listening!
This week's episode highlights an odd addiction of mine since the pandemic started (no, it's not what you think), a simple rule of thumb to make decisions (in anything) in a snap, and revived a little bit of my old high school reputation as a "love advisor" (if you cringed, I did too, but here we are). The last point should be somewhere in the last 5 minutes, so please feel free to do so if you'd like to skip to that part. I hope you enjoy it, and as always, thanks for listening!
This week's episode is quite the stretch, but for a good reason, of course. To those who intend to stand by or stood by until the end, thank you 3000!
Hope you enjoy it and stay tuned for the next episode! Cheers.
Decided to add on a little more spice for you from this episode onwards. In this session, I go brutally honest on how I see parenting today vs how I think it should be, know that you're not the best but different, why I started this podcast, and a few other jazzy life bits. 2 weeks ago, it was pure honesty, but from now on, we get real. Let's get to it, shall we?
In 2020, I had to undergo unexpected mental hurdles that I never thought I'd face, from dealing with the pandemic, losing loved ones, and even losing myself. This is the first time I could finally think out loud comfortably and share them with you. In this episode, I tackle self-check-up, pacing, tone-setting, and focus. Cheers.