Gotta Love Family Podcast: Recent Episodes
Mary Ann Johnson
A few Sundays ago, my husband tuned in to a show my mom likes to watch, Music and the Spoken Word. The episode he pulled up for her was from Jan. 12, 2025.
It was an interesting and thought-provoking 30 minutes, and Don and I had a conversation about it. We had experienced what was shared. Our experiences weren’t as dramatic as the one shared in the program, but they were powerful for us, nonetheless.
Join me today as I share the power of starting where you are, using what you have, and doing what you can to accomplish your dreams. You will enjoy the stories I share from the program Don and I heard and discussed, and the ones from my own life.
If you have something you want to do but it feels too big or scary, then this is a conversation for you. : )
One day in 2011, I found the most amazing book at the library!!! I happened across it accidentally. It was about Leonardo Da Vinci and the amazing visions he had. But that wasn’t all. The book showed how, in time, all his inventive ideas were created by other people and who those people were. Oh my gosh, I wanted to share this with my grands.
Join me as I share what we learned about and the Super-duper Rocket-propelled Robot we invented. You are going to love the story of when the lights went on for Jack and he created his 'all alone' invention. We had a spectacular time, and you can do the same with your kids or grands.
Recently, while rereading an article I had written in 2011, I read a note I received from a mom who wondered how I had stopped being a yeller. Here’s what she asked:
“I wanted to thank you again for a great class. I wondered if you could tell me more about the yelling you used to do. I grew up in that type of household, and swore I would never be like that… but guess what, I do? I’d love to hear how you mastered that part of your life. I didn’t do it when I only had 1 or 2 children and they were little. But the more children that came and the older they got, the more I slipped into it. Do you mind sharing what helped you?”
Join me as I share what helped me and helped her. The topic never goes out of date. We all struggle. Let's learn to be calm!
A couple of weeks ago, I introduced 'learning play' in an article called Learning Play - Cows. It tells how valuable immersive learning is for all ages and helps you begin by learning about cows.
Join me today as I share what we did to immerse ourselves in the world of the circus and the tremendous fun we had learning all about clowns, circus food, how to walk a tightrope, and how to juggle.
I am sure it will help you decide to have a family activity that will be rewardingly fun and help build wonderful memories.
This week, as I walked with my friends Livia and Alysia, the conversation turned to their teens and the issues surrounding accomplishing things at home. At one point, Livia mentioned the need for successful systems. I told them how interesting the conversation was because I was working on my article for today, and it was about creating systems that work. Life can be so serendipitous. : )
When I began speaking and teaching, I met a woman who became a friend and mentor, Kim Flynn. She was a systems specialist and helped me and other women find time to build businesses and successfully raise a family by using simple and workable systems. At the time, Kim had owned five successful businesses while raising her family.
I spent plenty of time in Kim’s home and with her children. I saw firsthand how well she did the very thing she taught others to do. During the time spent in Kim’s home, I noticed that she not only had simple and successful systems, but she had gotten her family to enroll in the systems and, for the most part, they used them successfully. I took notes. Join me and I will share them with you.
When I first began writing and publishing articles, it was in 2010. My grands, the ones I still live with, were all under five. As their grandma, I wanted to find ways to play and connect. I'm not a board game person! Tea parties and dress up are not on my list of fun things! The truth is, I like learning. I always have. I thought a lot about how I could ‘play’ with my grands and make it work for all of us. What I came up with was learning for fun.
I’ve been moving articles from my old site to this new home for nine years, come May 2025. Why has it taken so long? Well, I always have new experiences and lessons to share. And I had over 600 articles on the old site. That’s a lot of rewriting. : ) There are still fun things on that old site, especially when it comes to learning with kids and making it fun.
So, over the summer, I'm going to share many of the cool lessons I taught my grands and the tools I used to do it.
LET’S BEGIN WITH COWS
Your love of learning and growing is a legacy you leave for your children. But how can you find the time to read, study, or write while raising a family? It can be a challenge, but I know it can be done becuase I am doing it now, amid the chaos of a four-generation home, caregiving, and a busy life. This is something we can all do.
Join me as I share an example of the importance of giving your children an example of learning and growth. This can be done by anyone, no matter your circumstances. Let me show you how!
I've written many articles on the importance of making sure the story we tell ourselves is helpful to our sense of well-being, relationships, and happiness. How we perceive something matters.
Last week I shared one of two experiences that cemented what I have learned in over a decade and a half of taking control of how I 'see' what is happening in my life. Today I share the second. As with the first, it is powerful.
I’ve written many articles on the importance of making sure the story we tell ourselves is helpful to our sense of well-being, healthy relationships, and happiness. How we perceive something matters.
Recently, I had two experiences that cemented what I have learned in over a decade and a half of taking control of how I ‘see’ what is happening in my life, both in the past and present. I’m sharing one experience today and the other next week. They are powerful.
There is a common belief in the minds of the public that stress, from any situation that is ongoing, is toxic. Stress has been blamed for catching the common cold to creating cardiovascular problems.
Join me today as I debunk this myth and share another example illustrating how powerful what we believe can be in giving us our life results. This will blow your mind!!!
I have learned from lived experience that simple systems are usually the solution to difficult problems in time and life management. This was not an easy lesson to learn. In fact, understanding what a system looked like took some time. Join me as I help you understand what a simple system looks like and how it can be life-changing in your life and family.
When I was sixty-two, I emailed a very successful, well-known woman and asked her to help me with something in my business. It was as intimidating to me as writing the queen. She responded, shocked that I would think enough of her to ask. Imagine! We shared our hopes, dreams, struggles, and some of our fears. Here's what I discovered: She is me, and I am her. We are more alike than we are different. I think that's true of all of us. We worry that what is coming won’t live up to our expectations, that we won’t live up to our expectations.
Wouldn’t it be wonderful to know, for sure, that despite how now looks and feels, you are going to be OK? Wouldn’t it be nice? The desire to know we are not losers and are OK is inside each of us.
Join me as we look into the movie The Kid and explore how we can know we are OK.
In 2011, I took a class on body language because I had begun speaking from stage and knew it would be helpful. Then, the company offered a class taught by one of their trainers, Amy Walker, on how body language can assist you in understanding your kids and avoiding conflict.
I loved the class and gained much from it. Since I was working with families and children, I asked Amy if she would write an article on what she had taught the mothers and fathers in her class. She did.
I love the information, which has proven useful. Today, I am resharing this amazingly eye-opening information. I know you will find value here. You will either say, “Wow, good for me. I already know that,” or “Gosh, I didn’t realize that.” In either case, it will jumpstart your mind, and you will look at how you respond to your children with renewed or new eyes. Enjoy.
My husband was watching the show The Irrational. It’s about a behavioral science professor who solves tough police cases. I was in the kitchen and could hear it. The main character had an appendix surgery. He tried to rise from his bed a few times because there was a case he wanted to get going on. His sister had to nag at him to remain in bed and heal. At one point the professor spoke with a priest, while still in the hospital. The priest said, “St. Stillness has visited you." Then he smiled and the professor replied, “Oh, stillness. I’m not very good at it.”
This intrigued me because one of my favorite scriptures is “Be still and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10, from the Christian Bible. However, I, like the professor, must work to be still.
Join me as we explore how stillness is connected to rest and rejuvenation and how you, as a busy person, can have more rest in your life.
I received this email from a friend: “I recently watched the podcast Follow Him with Hank Smith and John Bytheway…. Their guest presenter…was Dr. Matt Townsend, who is a therapist. Many of the things he was saying reminded me of you and what you have shared about being present and communicating.”
I wasn’t familiar with Dr. Townsend or the podcast, but I took the time to listen because I love Susan and know she cares about me.
I'm no scholar so it was heartwarming and edifying to see how close I have come to what scholars have learned. I learned from hard experience and the tutoring of God, rather than in school. I was also privileged to work with a few hundred families and saw firsthand what I had learned as a mother. It’s amazing what I have gotten right based on what Dr. Townsend shared.
He used a word I was unfamiliar with but found worth sharing – attunement.
Join me today as we explore what the word Attunement means and how it can be helpful in connecting with our children.
This is my birthday article. : ) I turn seventy-five today, February 9th. This article was suggested by a dear friend and is, frankly, very vulnerable. I have pondered whether to publish it or not, whether it would be of value to anyone. However, it's my birthday, and I can do what I want, right; even if it may be somewhat risky. 😊
Today I am sharing my story about death, how it impacted me as a youth, in my marriage, and today. Join me as I share the ups and downs of learning to manage this story and how doing so has made my life manageable.
If you are facing something difficult with an uncertain outcome, death, divorce, job loss, parenting issues, etc. join me as I show you ways to find a way to lean into trust.
In 2012, because of an experience, I decided to be more open to receiving help from others. Trust me when I say my progress has been slow! I’ve always prided myself on my independence, ingenuity, and ability to do whatever needs to be done. I have always felt confident in “doing it myself.” However, it’s a challenge to do everything by yourself, all the time, and you miss out on the other side of the coin, the value that comes from receiving. I’ve had to learn this the hard way.
My inspiration to work on allowing others to share in my burdens came because of two people in my life that I loved, both with significant special needs. One was my unofficially adopted daughter, Michelle, in her thirties, and my granddaughter, Maggie. They both had cerebral palsy.
Join me as I share their story and how it has affected me when it comes to serving and receiving. Your heart will be moved!
My friend Livia read a book about Neal A. Maxwell. In the book, they used the phrase 'peaceful intensity' to describe how he managed his busy life. It’s a way of being that can be cultivated. It involves how we perceive what is happening in the moment. Maxwell said you can be busy but still function from a place of peace. As Livia and I talked I wondered, “How can those two words even go together?” I was intrigued by the idea and this unique phrase.
This is becuase I've been experiencing this place of busy peace in the last few years. It happens when I have this thought, STOP and TURN. In other words, shift how you see what is happening. When I listen and follow the thought I manage better. Even if the pace doesn’t slow down, my heart does. Imagine how life would be if this was our way of being most of the time.
Join me as I share what I have learned about living a life of peaceful intensity. I share two real-life experiences that will leave you wanting to know more.
This week’s article was written by an online friend of mine, Laura Pearson, who shared it with me via email. When I read her article, I realized that my daughter Jodie has incorporated many of these tips into her home and family life. They’ve been useful to my grands. Although they are all teens now, they have been using tools like these since they were in grade school.
These tips will assist parents using regular school options, as well as those who homeschool. In both cases we want our children to be able to love and feel comfortable learning. Take a look, there may be resources you have missed that would help your children. You may also expand those resources you currently use.
I’ve thought about how I want this year to feel, what I want to accomplish, and how I want to be. I read and reread my daily commitments (affirmations). I pondered what changes I should make. Was there anything I needed to add? The last two years have been challenging, as I have aged. It has been stretching and I've had to work to keep a positive attitude about building my life while fulfilling my mission of caring for my family.
Here is the truth - you don’t stop building a life because you grow older or get busy; you stop building a life when you stop doing the things required to build a life. I didn’t want to go to that place. Hence, all the pondering and prayer. I could live another thirty years and I must decide what that will look like, as far as I can control. We can’t control all circumstances, but we can control our response to everything.
Join me as I share some pivotal information that has helped me make a plan for 2025. They can help you do the same.
In 2011 I wrote a three-part series of articles about a principle that helps families manage better. I must confess it’s a principle I still work on because it isn’t easy to keep. I know the stories and the principle are worth repeating because principles never change and when lived, they impact us for good. I’m compiling the three-part series into one article. That will keep it simple for you. LOL
Join me as I share how making the intentional decision To Keep It Simple, helped us get what we needed and gave our family what they needed. It was a remarkable season. The sense of peace and joy came from doing less and not from doing it all. Our intentional efforts paid dividends and can do the same for your family.
Parenting is a place to learn to grow as a person. Seriously. : ) Even now, when I’m caregiving, rather than parenting, I experience examples of this type of growth. It always takes me off guard because I would like to think that in almost 75 years, I had gotten this growth thing handled. Silly, because learning and personal growth are a lifetime endeavor.
Today I am being vulnerable and sharing one of these growth moments. I hope it brings a smile to your face and puts you in a thoughtful position about how you teach and communicate with your children. Join me as I share the importance of allowing ourselves to learn without berating ourselves and that when we do - when we error we can also restore.
Recently, I read an entry from Feb. 2023 that contained information I thought would be useful to some of you. It isn’t new. I’ve written on, the power of story, the importance of perspective, and the value of controlling our thoughts often. But when you attach powerful ideas to an event, they become more relatable and easier to institute into one’s life.
In February 2023, I was taking an Emotional Resilience class. At the same time, I was endeavoring to come to terms with time because my story wasn’t helpful and I knew it. Coming to terms with time is something I have been working on for years and I bet some of you are in that boat with me.
After class, at home, I reread the lesson. As I did, I had major insights. I knew they would help me with my negative story about time and I would move closer to becoming friends with time.
The lesson in my Emotional Resilience class was ‘Managing Stress and Anxiety’. The foundation principle was – Use time wisely. This lesson was for me! LOL
Join me today as I share portions of that Feb. 2023 journal entry and the crux of becoming friends with time. : )
Recently, I read an entry from Feb. 2023 that contained information I thought would be useful to some of you. It isn’t new. I’ve written on, the power of story, the importance of perspective, and the value of controlling our thoughts often. But when you attach powerful ideas to an event, they become more relatable and easier to institute into one’s life.
In February 2023, I was taking an Emotional Resilience class. At the same time, I was endeavoring to come to terms with time because my story wasn’t helpful and I knew it. Coming to terms with time is something I have been working on for years and I bet some of you are in that boat with me.
After class, at home, I reread the lesson. As I did, I had major insights. I knew they would help me with my negative story about time and I would move closer to becoming friends with time.
The lesson in my Emotional Resilience class was ‘Managing Stress and Anxiety’. The foundation principle was – Use time wisely. This lesson was for me! LOL
Join me today as I share portions of that Feb. 2023 journal entry and the crux of becoming friends with time. : )
In October I asked myself this question - “How can I strengthen my relationship with each grandchild and great-grandchild despite age, technology, or distance.” There are impediments of time, finances, the ability to travel, different lifestyles, and beliefs, kids who are adults or teens, and technology, which often gets in the way of real connection.
Recently a friend mentioned that her son, Curtis, said - “When you only send cards and not letters, I can’t reread them.” What, this from a grown man who uses all the available tech? He wants letters from his mom so he can reread them!
How can we let the people we love most know they are thought about, loved, and cared for even if they are miles away? How can we consistently say, you are in my thoughts, you matter to me? Join me as I share what I have done in the past, plan to implement now, and what I am returning to. It will help you answer this important question for yourself.
In October I asked myself this question - “How can I strengthen my relationship with each grandchild and great-grandchild despite age, technology, or distance.” There are impediments of time, finances, the ability to travel, different lifestyles, and beliefs, kids who are adults or teens, and technology, which often gets in the way of real connection.
Recently a friend mentioned that her son, Curtis, said - “When you only send cards and not letters, I can’t reread them.” What, this from a grown man who uses all the available tech? He wants letters from his mom so he can reread them!
How can we let the people we love most know they are thought about, loved, and cared for even if they are miles away? How can we consistently say, you are in my thoughts, you matter to me? Join me as I share what I have done in the past, plan to implement now, and what I am returning to. It will help you answer this important question for yourself.
Let’s pick up where we left off last week. I shared a cookie-baking experience I had with some neighbor children, who were my buddies. Today, I share the second baking experience, one I had with two of my grandchildren. Watch for the connections as we explore how to determine a successful activity.
You are going to love Story 2, my second baking experience with kids and you will love how both stories illustrate what makes a successful activity.
In the article published on Oct. 13, I told you I LOVE using sparks and that in the coming months, I would share experiences I have had with them that can Spark you with bonding activities for your family.
As promised, here is a spark I followed with two groups of children. However, I want you to notice something else as important as following a spark or igniting one. Often, we let our expectations get in the way of learning and fun. As I said in my book, Becoming A Present Parent, “Keep expectations from getting in the way of enjoying your family…Keep the perfect from becoming the enemy of the good. The point is not what you teach, or how well it looks, but being together while you’re Present.”
Because of the length of each story, this week I will share Story 1, and next week I will share Story 2 and tie them together for you - how can you tell if an activity is successful? : )
Thirteen years ago, I had a wonderful evening with my eight-year-old friend, Hailey. It was successful because time had been set apart for the activity, it happened consistently so Hailey could count on it, and I was present. When we want to solidify relationships in our family these three ingredients make all the difference. I was 61 when I had this experience. Hailey was eight.
Join me as I share an experience that illustrates how important structured family activities, held consistently, and with you present, both body and spirit will be for your relationships. These elements, when inserted with intention into your family, can and will make all the difference in your family relationships.
Thirteen years ago, I had a wonderful evening with my eight-year-old friend, Hailey. It was successful because time had been set apart for the activity, it happened consistently so Hailey could count on it, and I was present. When we want to solidify relationships in our family these three ingredients make all the difference. I was 61 when I had this experience. Hailey was eight.
Join me as I share an experience that illustrates how important structured family activities, held consistently, and with you present, both body and spirit will be for your relationships. These elements, when inserted with intention into your family, can and will make all the difference in your family relationships.
Two weeks ago, I shared a few examples of how useful and fun seeing and responding to your children's Sparks can be. I explained sparks and how they can help you and your kids connect.
Last week I illustrated how you can Spark your kids and give them interesting and fun opportunities for learning. This week is more of the same. : )
I have written about sparks, kids, and the connection between the two for almost fifteen years. I’ve watched for and used sparks with my grands all that time.
When I switched from the homeschool community to the broader parenting community, I didn’t share this information as often. However, I LOVE using sparks and in the coming weeks, I will share more because the better you are at seeing your kids sparks and sparking them, the more fun, learning, and connection you will have in your home. It’s important to remember that what we think of as play can be, and is, learning for children and sometimes teens. : )
Last week I talked about doing a treasure hunt of my home and shared two activities we did from what I found in my kitchen. Today’s ideas are also from that kitchen list.
One thing we don’t do enough is play as a family. As you learn to utilize Sparks they will help you create family fun. So listen up and then have some fun.
Last episode I shared a few examples of how useful and fun seeing and responding to your children’s Sparks can be.
But to engage our kids and help them learn new things we don’t need to wait for their Sparks. When it comes to learning, we can spark them and then watch a fire of interest take hold. It’s a fine way to engage as a family and to show our children that learning can be fun.
Join me as I share how to treasure hunt your home so you can give your children experiences that teach them that learning doesn’t need to be boring but can happen in fun and exciting ways, anywhere. This is useful for children to experience and internalize so they won’t become stagnant in their desire to learn as they become busy adults.
My hairdresser, Emily, works out of her home. Most of the kids are in school but she has one little guy who is four and still at home during the day. We have fun conversations.
The last time I was there he brought me two green balloons which he held close together in his hands. He asked me if I knew what they were. I said, “Sure, they’re green balloons.” He laughed and replied, “No they are butt cheeks.” His mom was a bit mortified, but I grinned and told her about a friend of mine and her experience with the whole poop, snot, blood, and butt cheeks thing.
Join me as I share this story and two others that will help you know what your kids are interested in right now and then use that knowledge to bond your family, build your relationships, and have a great time with your kids.
When I lived in Montana with seven children, I was a busy mother. You’re smiling because you know exactly what I mean. A family, regardless of its size, is a handful; lots of cooking, laundry, cleaning, driving people here and there, and so forth. I look back and wonder how in the world I did it all.
I have also pondered how I managed with so little connection to other women. I had my church friends. I had my school band club friends. I had friends when I was a Girl Scout Leader. I had friends that I taught community classes with.
What I had very little of were face-to-face, heart-to-heart connections, where you sit down, breathe together, and confide in each other. There are reasons for this. I am a leader, but I am also a loner. I like to get in there, get it done, and then I want to be alone. I chose to work and manage on my own because I felt I could. I didn’t think about how to fit these types of connections into my life because I didn’t think they were important, and I was busy!
Join me as I share what I learned over five long years about the value of face-to-face and heart-to-heart connections regardless of where you are in your life.
On March 3, 2024, I published a podcast titled Are You Afraid to Read Hard Books? After that article was published, I got a wonderful email from one of my readers, who is also a dear friend.
I get emails regularly telling me how good an article was or how helpful it was to the reader. This email contained some of that. What struck me though was another thing that happens now and then. Someone takes what I have written, and they build upon it! This is massively motivating for me.
I asked Joy if I could share her thoughts with you because what she has done with family reading is magnificent. I think that some of you will want to follow suit, in some fashion.
Join me and see the tremendous event her family has put into place when it comes to reading great books.
This has caused me some consternation as I have moved along life’s highway. Do you realize how much has changed since I was born in 1950!! It wasn’t such a big issue until I became an adult and technology exploded.
Recently I was forced to move from Windows 10 to Windows 11. I was freaked out. Join me as I share how managing technology, with its twists and turns, is like moving down the road of life and parenting. It will be illuminating!
In our world, we’re so used to having technology always with us that it’s challenging to be without it for even a short time. Technology, as wonderful as it is, can be a two-edged sword.
I have written several articles on using, abusing, and letting go of technology. I have experimented with this myself. A recent email I received has me thinking about it again.
Before I share the email, I want to share some of my experiences with technology, managing it, and not being managed by it. This has required that I commit to taking technology breaks.
Join me as I share personal experiences with the joy, difficulty, and rewards of learning to manage your technology use.
Early this spring Jodie was taking a short trip. She hauled the suitcase out of the garage so she could pack. Later, she asked me if I had seen it. No, I hadn’t but I went upstairs to help her look. We searched everywhere and then lo and behold we saw it! It was leaning up against the wall by the front door, in direct sight. It wasn’t hidden by anything. Sometimes we get blind!
This type of blindness happens when we’re working on relationships, teaching our children, managing our home, figuring out how to use time more wisely, getting better systems in place so life flows more smoothly, using money wisely, healing ourselves, etc.
Experience has taught me that no matter how invested we are, we can’t always see what is right in front of us. Sometimes we are blind. There are reasons for this: preconceived ideas, weariness, our bucket is empty, feeling that the issue is too big, maybe we aren’t smart enough, we lack helpful resources, and others.
Join me as I share 8 tips that will help you overcome occasional blindness and find solutions to sticky issues with greater ease.
Seven years ago, Jodie and her family moved from Kearns, UT. to West Point, UT. We were living with them, helping with Maggie and the other children. Living in a home with kids was assisting Don with his health challenges. It was a win-win situation.
Eventually, we needed a home that was more handicap accessible. Don found the house in West Point and when Jodie looked at it, she could see how good it would be for us. However, many things needed to be upgraded. That was daunting to think about.
Join me as I illustrate how we put our home in order and use it as an example of what it takes to put our inner houses in order. You will be surprised at the similarities and how powerful this will be.
I have learned from lived experience that simple systems are usually the solution to difficult problems in time and life management. This was not an easy lesson to learn, and I occasionally still ignore this truth, but when I do, I suffer.
Join me as I help you understand what a system is, how it works, and how it can change your life. If you are living with default systems then it is harder to care for yourself, do the important things, and still care for your family. Join me as I help you understand what a system is, how they work, and how they can change your life.
I had a funny conversation with a single dad. We were talking about how to keep things clean and how to get our kids to clean. I noticed he wasn’t an efficient housekeeper. He felt he was doing ok, and it was ok, just not very clean. : ) This comes from someone who was a professional housekeeper for almost two decades.
This dad told me they have a long-time family friend named Steffanie. She is a natural-born cleaner, like me. When he asked the kids to clean anything they would respond, “Dad’s clean, or Stefanie’s clean.” Gotta love kids!
My goal today is not to discuss different systems for getting kids to do chores or how to get kids to do chores. It’s about keeping home management and teaching in place while reinforcing good relationships at the same time. I’m sharing two things I did that worked for a time and helped build relationships. One is truly radical. It will leave some of you speechless and others of you laughing. I’m sharing them because they illustrate the importance of relationships over home management.
Join me and see how you can care for home and family and still build relationships.
I had a conversation last March with a young friend. Yes, it has taken me over a year to figure out how to share our conversation. The topic is challenging, and I am busy caregiving. This last comment leads us into my conversation with my friend.
She was overwhelmed and felt like a parenting and personal failure. She wanted to know how to identify the essentials and have some control. : ) I could relate to everything she was feeling and suffering. Frankly, I was in the same boat but for different reasons. She was asking me something I was just beginning to get a handle on myself. That is probably why over a year passed before I could share the conversation.
Join me as I share our situations and the tips I shared with my friend that help me manage what is and where I am.
I have a granddaughter and a dear friend with special needs. I have another friend who has six children with special needs. These relationships require us to face many challenges but if we can find beauty and joy in the journey, as my friend with the six special needs children says, we choose the scenic route.
This doesn't just apply to families with children like my granddaughter and friends. Doesn't every child have 'special needs?' Isn't parenting any child a challenge of change and growth?
Join me as I share some tips on how you can choose the scenic route despite the challenges of parenting any child.
I read a verse of scripture that sparked this article. “I have commanded you to bring up your children in light and truth. . .therefore, First, set in order thy house” Doctrine and Covenants 93:43 On this day, I read it in a new way. I focused on “First, set in order thy house”. It brought to my mind another verse of scripture. “For now we see through a glass darkly”. 1 Cor. 14:12
Seeing through a glass darkly is an apt analogy when we are sharing knowledge with our children. If the windows to our home are dark, we cannot see out of them clearly. Everything we see will be dimmed by our own darkness. We will not be able to give more light to our families than we possess. We must be enlightened first, and then we can share with our children.
It caused me to think of the classics I have read and my spiritual canon. If we are unfamiliar with good literature and that which informs our belief system, then we cannot call them to mind when a quote, verse, or thought might enlighten a child, illuminate a teaching, open a new learning adventure, or ease a soul. These quotes and teachings won’t be in us because our house is empty, and our windows are dark. As parents, we want to do and say the best thing when it is needed, so we can give help, comfort, and knowledge to our children. Having light in our own house, so to speak, is vital.
Reading good books and our spiritual canon or other writings that inform our belief system is like washing our windows and filling our house with light. As we enlighten ourselves, we see more clearly. We see our children and their needs more clearly.
So, how do busy parents find the time for self-education, reading, and reflection? Join me as I share nine tips that will help you learn and grow despite the business that comes with being a parent.
This is the last article in the series on cleaning systems. This is the system I use today. Let me give you the back story.
I have tried many cleaning systems, but I always returned to ‘THE LIST.’ I am a list maker. It seemed the most useful and satisfying way to manage my daily work. However, I am also a finisher. This and list-making can be a combination for failure. It isn’t that you fail, but you always feel like a failure because you can never finish the list.
In real life, you never finish the list. Part of the reason for this is, that not everything you have to do in a day is on the list - dishes, meals, laundry, running kids to friends, that extra trip to school when someone is ill, and so forth. This list/finisher combination caused me grief for most of my life. If I am not careful and follow my current system, it still can be. Just being honest. : )
When I found myself in a four-generation home, just as busy as when I was raising seven children, I began praying about the issue. God knows me well, and he likes me how I am. But He also knows there are ways that I can manage my natural way of being/energy better. So that seemed like the best place to go for help.
Join me today as I share the cleaning system I use today, why it works for me, and why it might work for you.
This is the last article in the series on cleaning systems. This is the system I use today. Let me give you the back story.
I have tried many cleaning systems, but I always returned to ‘THE LIST.’ I am a list maker. It seemed the most useful and satisfying way to manage my daily work. However, I am also a finisher. This and list-making can be a combination for failure. It isn’t that you fail, but you always feel like a failure because you can never finish the list.
In real life, you never finish the list. Part of the reason for this is, that not everything you have to do in a day is on the list - dishes, meals, laundry, running kids to friends, that extra trip to school when someone is ill, and so forth. This list/finisher combination caused me grief for most of my life. If I am not careful and follow my current system, it still can be. Just being honest. : )
When I found myself in a four-generation home, just as busy as when I was raising seven children, I began praying about the issue. God knows me well, and he likes me how I am. But He also knows there are ways that I can manage my natural way of being/energy better. So that seemed like the best place to go for help.
Join me today as I share the cleaning system I use today, why it works for me, and why it might work for you.
I read an article my friend Donna Goff wrote called Trade in Your To-Do List. The article I read, resonated with me because my daily worksheet can feel overwhelming. The problem is, I rarely get each item on the list finished, even if I am running circles all day long, Donna had experienced the same thing. And no matter how much you accomplish in a day, if there are unchecked items left on your list it can leave you with a sense of not having done enough. It shouldn’t. I know better. You probably know better. Donna knows better. But occasionally it does.
Join me as I share a fun way to take a break, clear your head, and possibly make way for a systems tune-up in how you keep on top of things at home.
Anne Murdock just retired from decades of working with special needs children. That is our big link, as I have a special needs granddaughter. We met in church and became fast friends. Although I moved, we have stayed in touch. Recently we began meeting for lunch. We each drive about 30 minutes and it has been fun.
A few months ago, we discussed a cool system Anne uses to help women stay on top of their work at home and have fewer moments of feeling like they can’t manage. It’s called Household Bingo. You check off the boxes as you finish jobs until you have a bingo. Take time to reward yourself, read a book, take a walk, listen to music, etc. Then you work for the next bingo. Eventually, you will have crossed everything off the card. Then you create a new card by asking the question, “What is most pressing right now?” Sounds interesting, doesn’t it!
It is a simple system using the principle that small things, done consistently, make big things happen.
Join me as I explain how this simple and effective system can keep you from saying, "Why am I in such a mess?"
In the next few weeks, I will be sharing some cleaning systems from friends of mine and myself. We all need help managing the 'pile' of things that need to be done so that we don't get bogged down and feel like failures. This is a very familiar feeling to most of us!
I begin with my friend Donna Goff who is a writer, teacher, mentor, and mother to a large family. Join me as we explore how she stays on time and avoids the dreaded 'neverending list.'
There are many ways to recharge and care for yourself but they aren't helpful unless you know what works for you. and did you know that what works can change and then you have to go back to the drawing board.
Join me as I share an experience from 2011 and another from 2024 that is illuminating when it comes to understanding what works for you when you need to recharge.
I will also share why I don't buy the idea that to recharge we have to go outside of the chaos of daily living. If that is the case, then many of us will get very little self-care.
It doesn’t matter how you recharge. When you know what works, do it daily and the heat of the day will be less intense.
In the last two weeks, I’ve given you some information on Sparks and how to use them to connect with your children. In the article on March 10 – SPARKS - The Big Fail, I mentioned that when we learn to utilize Sparks, we can help our children love the idea of learning.
Kids have a lot to learn, and often, whether we homeschool or use public or private schools, the love of learning can get buried. We can’t prevent times when school is boring or too hard. But we can keep the desire to learn alive, as we utilize our children's Sparks.
When I was speaking and teaching, I spent many hours helping parents use their children’s Sparks. I wrote LOTS of articles on the experiences actual families had. Today’s article was written in 2012, the same year I had my big fail and many big wins.
My friend, Leah, was taking her family to Florida and wanted them to LOVE the trip and to LEARN a lot. We both knew what I wrote in the article two weeks ago - Life is about learning, and the best-lived lives happen when we continue to learn. Leah wanted this for her boys.
Join me as I share how Leah got her boys on board and how she took a Spark and turned it into a roaring fire.
Last week I shared information about Sparks and how valuable they can be in building child-parent relationships. I also shared my big failure when it came to one of my grandsons Sparks. Let’s have a quick review.
In my book Becoming a Present Parent I wrote that the value of seeing your child’s Sparks is that it’s a wonderful way to get Present with your child. It’s powerful not only in helping them love learning but also in creating tighter relationships. So, what is a Spark? Simply put, a Spark is anything that a child says or does that lets you know they’re interested in something right now.
Last week I shared a big Spark fail. Today I want to share a Big Spark win. When you understand Sparks and how to use them you will listen, enjoy, and bond better with your children.
In my book Becoming a Present Parent I wrote that the value of seeing your child’s Sparks is that it’s a wonderful way to get Present with your child. It’s powerful not only in helping them love learning but also in creating tighter relationships.
Over the next few months, I want to share some examples of how I, and other parents, were able to use Sparks to connect with our kids. They are fun ideas that you can incorporate with your children, even if they haven’t shown up as a Spark, because you can also ignite Sparks. Light a spark and watch it burn!
Besides, it’s nice to have a quiver of ideas in your back pocket, especially with summer right around the corner and the sometimes boring days it brings. Learning slows down and tech takes over. It is useful to have some fun ideas and then gather your kids around for some non-tech enjoyment.
One of the reasons I’m going to tackle this issue of Sparks in the next couple of months is because I’m going to be spending LOTS of time caring for my grands. I fly to Seattle for a week, mid-month, where my grands range in age from almost twelve to four. Then it’s on to Colorado for a week. These grands range in age from married with kids, down to age four. I need a reminder, because as I see Sparks, I can respond, and our time together will be more powerful.
The article I am sharing this week was written in late 2011 and is about an epic failure in the Sparks arena. It illustrates the number one thing to remember about Sparks – the younger the child the shorter the Sparks shelf life. So when a Spark pops up you need to be prepared to respond. When you do, the results are amazing. Next week I will share a success.
Have you ever wondered how to read books that aren’t easy reads? This has been an issue for me. I LOVE reading but sometimes the classics are a challenge. History can be dry. Some books deal with tough topics. How do you manage those?
I just finished a book while at my daughter's in Seattle, The Midnight Library. It’s a book I would recommend to others, but it wasn’t what I would call a ‘tough read.’ It was a thoughtful and enjoyable read. We all need those now and then but to learn and grow we occasionally need the tough read.
In May of 2023, I finished the book, Confucius - The Analects. Here is what I posted: “OK, this book was a tough read for me! I know exactly why I am not a philosophy major. I do not think deeply enough or abstractly enough. I had friends who read this and told me it was a must-read. So, I read it. Yes, the whole thing, but I confess, I didn’t get most of it.
Join me as we discuss how to read hard books. When you can tackle hard books, then you can help your children and youth do the same. It is a skill worth learning and then passing on.
Every mother struggles to bring all that she has to the family table. We all want to teach our children to be kind, to have manners, to be honest, to do their chores, to share, and on and on. We also want to teach skills that can help them as adults. We desire to encourage them to develop talents for the joy of it. It can feel daunting.
But there is something else that many of us struggle with; we want to have meaningful ‘family learning’, where our families connect and where the connection we create is passed down. That can often seem even more challenging because of the time and effort it can take. This is not something that we can give to our children by our example or our way of being.
I am talking about what we do as a family that is uniquely our own, that is passed on because we did them together and they became part of us. Today we are going to tackle this sticky wicket and see how it can be done, even if you have felt that you are failing at this or if you don’t even get what I’m talking about. : )
I have a friend that I admire very much, Alysia Humphries. What got me thinking about her this last couple of weeks was that tonight (Saturday) I am going to a special event for caregivers. She and a handful of other women are giving some nurturing to caregivers. I fit into that group and so Alysia asked me to come. I am going to have some foot zoning done and Alysia is giving me some light therapy. Restful!
That got me thinking about Alysia and a letter she sent to me after an event I participated in over a dozen years ago to help to mothers focus better on what matters. Today Alysia kids are twelve years older, but being a present parent doesn’t change even when your kids are adults. I thought you would enjoy her letter and the tips that she came up with for herself to manage better. Enjoy Alysia’s experience and I will enjoy my light therapy. : )
I recall getting an email from a very harried mom with a three-year-old. I laugh about it still because I can relate!
“YIKES!! My three-year-old wants me to help him with everything!! I need some activities and games for small children!”
Not long after, I got an email from a mom who was homeschooling. She loved working with her eight-year-old, but she had two littles who made it difficult to give her older son the attention she wanted to. She needed some diversions for those little ones. She planned for all of them to be in the same room, but she needed her littles to be able to play happily without her help for short periods.
Today I will share a HUGE list of activities that will keep your small children occupied for short periods leaving you free to work with an older child, do some chores, work from home, or do your reading and study.
These activities come from many mothers so they are tried and true!
Do you have cherished dreams? Is there a goal you want as much as breathing? Do you worry that because you chose to be a parent they may never come to pass?
I can relate. I raised seven children. I was busy and overwhelmed lots of the time. I had goals and dreams and there were times I felt they could come to pass. Then, just when I felt I was moving towards them, I would be called home physically or emotionally and the dream would be on hold again.
Today, I want to encourage you and give you heart, so will hold on to your dreams while you do this most important calling, raising your family. I have often said, “You can’t know until you get there.” I have gotten to a new place and in time, I believe you will get there too.
Join me as I share the new place I have gotten and how it can give you hope for your dreams and goals.
Life as a single parent is a challenging journey, but it can also be filled with growth, resilience, and moments of joy. I have a daughter navigating this path, and it can be both painful and joyous watching her and her children as they move through this new territory. To manage well requires a blend of practical strategies and emotional fortitude.
Understanding how to manage as a single parent, either a mom or dad, requires support and resources. In April of 2023, I posted an article by a fellow writer, Laura Pearson, filled with resources to assist parents returning to school. Today I am sharing another of her articles with resources for single parents. If you are a single parent this will probably not be new information for you, but I hope the included links will be useful in helping you move forward in investigating these and other resources that may be just what you need.
I no longer make New Year's Resolutions. Instead, I have a few useful tools I use. Today I will be talking about three ways you can put the coming year in order in your mind, and manifest what you want your life to look and feel like. Doing these simple steps has made the last ten years more powerful for me and I have been able to accomplish some BIG things, while busily working and caregivng. I hope you join me and discover what it is you want in the next three to five years.
Last week, I shared my daughter’s journey from a traumatic brain injury to a life of love and service. I shared one of the secrets to her success – she had taken charge of what she focused on.
I, like my daughter, put ideas on my wall. I post on my walls thoughts and ideas that I want to understand and incorporate into my life and way of being. I thought it would be fun to share some of what I have on my walls with you. If it resonates you may want to post it on your walls. If not, enjoy the read and then find what does resonate. I have many thoughts from spiritual leaders in my faith. You will find the same in your faith. I have quotes from people I trust or admire. Some come from books I have read. If it rings true or is principle-based, it can find its way to a wall in my home.
I hope you join me and learn a hack that will elevate your life.
In 2003, my world turned upside down when my daughter, Jenny, was hit head-on by a drunk driver going the wrong way on a California freeway. Five years later, I wrote an article about Jenny’s journey and how she turned a major head injury into a life worth living. Another eleven years have passed, and I have watched my daughter live these words – You are what you think about and focus on.
Jenny's sixteen-year odyssey is powerful. If you find yourself frustrated, angry, discouraged, resentful, sad, feeling less than, or any number of other difficult emotions, then this is a true story for you.
I know Jenny's recovery from an accident that left her unable to walk, think of the word for shoe, orange, etc., track conversations, manage social cues, or remember anything, was due to her preparation for life. Join me as I share her secret for living well, no matter the circumstances.
On December 17 I posted an article on my website and made a podcast called How to Enjoy Life More, Even When It's Hard. That same day I received a tender mercy that fit in perfectly with the theme of the article. I am sharing it here.
Today, although there are things I could share that would be less time-consuming and less emotionally draining, I am telling you about my morning. I am sharing this experience for a reason. After several decades of working on two principles, they can still trip me up. They are also stumbling blocks for many moms I talk with. I have written about them often, and I don’t want to beat a dead horse, but this is pivotal for our happiness and our ability to parent and relationship well.
Join me as I share two principles, that when learned, must be practiced for a lifetime and as we do we will parent from a better place, have more stable relationships, and feel more peace.
My daughter has a saying she lives by and I have seen the amazing results in her family. "What if we said yes as often as we could and not only when we had to?"
Join me today as I share three crazy family examples of how living this way can impact your family relationships in a BIG way.
I walk daily. Walking is the only exercise I get because, as I understand it, you can’t count housework. LOL I walk five blocks.
My sister, a fitness instructor, suggested I could employ the weights I carry better.
I took her advice and began utilizing my weights in a new way. I raise one arm into the air and keep it lifted as I walk, for as long as I can. The pain begins slowly, but eventually, I must put my arm down. Then I lift the other arm and repeat the process. Then I let both arms swing by my side until I feel I can lift the weight again. I do at least two repetitions of each arm and sometimes three. Each month I can lift the weight longer.
During one of my walks, I realized how much this exercise is like the caregiving I do every day and how much it’s like the parenting we’re all doing. Both are weights we carry. Sometimes, it becomes painful, and you wonder if you can keep it up. The truth is that to manage these weights well, we do eventually have to put our arm down, metaphorically speaking. We need a break.
Join me as we talk about how to carry the weight of parenting with greater success.
Back in 2012, I read an article by Kerry Patterson of the Arbinger Institute, a company designed to build leaders and businesses. He has also helped author several wonderful books designed to help people have better relationships in families, at work, and in communities. I have enjoyed reading his work for many years. This article, which was published around the holidays, beautifully showcased the power of love. I am sharing it with you because it is powerful. I hope it will bless you and help change your life. : )
On October 15th of this year, I posted an article called Are You Self-Aware? What Does That Even Look Like? In the article, I listed ideas for becoming more aware of our own emotional state. Then I listed things I was committing to do for myself. At the end of the article, there was this P. S. “Mediation came up often on the lists. I have meditated in the past but right now, I can’t commit to it.”
Join me as I share my meditation journey. I will share what I have done to make it workable and I will let you in on the amazing results I have gotten from my very simple meditation routine. You will find it all so doable no matter how busy you are and it will improve your busy days!
November and December are perfect months to teach our children about gratitude and sharing. It’s an excellent time to review our family culture around giving and receiving. During these months, there are multiple opportunities to teach our children that no matter how wonderful it is to receive, giving brings deep satisfaction and joy. Today I want to share a few stories about family philanthropy, how it benefits children, how you can make it part of your family culture, and why it isn't just about giving money.
I like Kerry Patterson. He is a great writer and from my era, so I relate to everything he writes. Back in September 2012, Kerry wrote an article about unplugging from the workplace, the difficulty and the benefits. I saw amazing parallels for a family. In the ensuing eleven years, I have seen what Kerry shared become even more challenging.
Join me as I share thoughts, ideas, and facts on how technology may be causing your feelings of dissatisfaction and lack of family connectedness.
Last week I included in my weekly newsletter the link to a podcast I did a few weeks ago for Beyond the Cookie Cutter. It was about managing change. Then this week, out of nowhere, I found myself faced with another possible change. It will require a shift in a hope I have held on to for a long time and an adjustment in how I deal with a current situation. This reminded me of where I was back in 2013 and some hard lessons I had to learn. I want to share what I learned in 2013 because it is so 2023. LOL
Join me for some lessons on how life is like an onion and remaining happy when life takes turns you didn't plan for or expect.
Here is the link I promised - https://open.spotify.com/episode/1zNJCE8XkBtm4ZbN3WEeIP
Last spring, I was listening to a talk at church and the speaker gave a statistic that I found intriguing and a bit surprising. He said that most people think they are self-aware but that when tested only about 15% are. That is a low number of people who really know where they are emotionally, at any given time.
You are probably not surprised that this information would catch my eye. After all, I did a little counseling for myself this year because I knew there were issues with my self-awareness which made it difficult to manage triggers and stress.
So what does being self-aware look like, how does it impact your life, and what can you do to become more self-aware? Join me as we explore the answers to these questions and more.
I am a finisher. This will be important for you to remember as you read this article. Being a finisher is a blessing in my life and the lives of those I live with and serve. But it has its drawbacks. I can get caught up in projects and leave people behind.
Learning to STOP what we are doing in favor of something that is truly more important, usually having to do with our spouse or children, is a process. I have had to learn to give myself space and time to keep practicing. Changing one’s way of being, whatever that may look like for you, takes intention, effort, consistency, and time. I have had to learn to forgive myself when I must be reminded that something else matters more than my current project.
A change of heart, a new way of being, can take years to achieve and then it isn’t usually a done deal. We must be reminded occasionally of what we know and our new way of responding. Perfect rarely happens. Changing our way of being is not the same as ticking something off a list, like making your bed every morning. It is deeper and it matters more.
Here are two stories that will become one and will give you a clear idea of what change takes and how important it is to grant yourself space and time for it.
If you had asked me twenty-five years ago if I had a sense of humor, I would have replied that fun and funny are not on top of my list. I don’t get jokes. I don’t see the humorous first. Getting stuff done is my thing. Being on time matters. Maintaining order is number one. I liked things and people to be a certain way. Because of this, I was easily frustrated or annoyed by situations and people, including my husband and kids.
However, a decade and a half ago, when I began speaking and teaching, I was in for a shock. I made people laugh. I am no comedian, but I said things in a way that was humorous to an audience. People assured me of this all the time. : ) I would never have guessed that there was another side to me.
Join me as I share my process of acknowledging this new view of myself and the changes required to make it an ongoing part of myself. I also share what is required to make this type of inner change, a personality shift, if you will.
I had a heart-to-heart conversation with my daughter, Kate, on pridefulness vs. pride. I recorded Part 1 and Part 2 of that conversation. This is part three. Join me as I share what duality is, how it looks in parenting, and why it matters. This was a great end to a powerful conversation.
Last week I shared a conversation I had with my daughter Kate on pride vs. pridefulness. It was illuminating. This week I am sharing the part of the conversation that blew me away and shows, yet again, that you can't know the value you bring as a mother, until later, even if you think you are doing a poor job. Join me and be heartened on your parenting journey.
A few months ago, I had a conversation with one of my daughters on the issue of pride vs. pridefulness. It was amazing and insightful. Today I am going to share an experience my daughter had in sixth grade that taught her that girls and women should be self-deprecating to be accepted and liked. It will blow your socks off. You may even relate.
Then we will delve into the difference between pride and pridefulness and how to help our kids to know the difference and allow themselves to take pride in their accomplishments. It matters!
This summer I took a few months off from writing. It was a wonderful rest, but in those off weeks, I had an experience that I want to share. When I read the book Sabbath: Finding Rest, Renewal, and Delight in Our Busy Lives by Wayne Muller, I created a list that allowed me to implement what I learned about rest, renewal, and space.
But, I only implemented one item on the list. During my writing break, I found the list. Oh man, it was good! So I came up with a plan to intentionally implement more ways in my life for space thought and rest. Whether you are a spiritual person or not, whether you identify with God or not, you will love my list and what I learned. Join me and improve your own life.
The earth, if we are paying attention, can teach us so much symbolically, and metaphorically. Here is a lesson I was reminded of this week in my garden.
Join me as I share a gardening concept - deadheading. It is a metaphor for life. Join me as I teach you what deadheading is and how it applies to you, your life, and your family.
Life is never going to be perfect no matter how hard you try. When we can accept that, then we are free to enjoy the good job we are doing, despite the imperfections, especially in our parenting efforts. So learn how to deadhead. : )
My life seems filled with opportunities to prove to myself, repeatedly, that consistency in small things really can accomplish BIG things, things we thought we couldn’t do.
Join me today as I share information about the principle - small steps done consistently does accomplish BIG things. I will share some examples that will amaze you.
I have gained this wisdom the hard way but you can get better at it without a lifetime of struggle. Join me. : )
Do you ever have the feeling that your efforts aren’t good enough, even though you are giving it all you have at the time? I have and still do, occasionally.
Join me today as I share a perfect example and how, if we let time do its work, we will learn that we are doing far better than we thought!
I have had a rocky relationship with time but lately, I have been making great progress in this relationship. That is until last week when all you know what broke loose. Come join me and see how an article on time turned into a beautiful Mother's Day article on our value and worth.
I like things my way. It's true. It has taken intention for me to learn to be flexible and generous with others’ differences. It hasn’t been an easy ride, but I really wanted to make this change. Over ten years ago, I began praying for charity. As I studied, I learned that charity isn’t what we do it is how we are - a way of being made up of many traits. Hmmm Here are two that cause me trouble – long-suffering and not easily offended. They relate to flexibility and generosity with others’ weaknesses or the differences in how they manage life from how we manage life.
Yikes. How was God going to help me go from being inflexible and frequently annoyed and frustrated with others’ imperfections and differences to long-suffering and not easily offended?
Join me as I share part of my journey and the perfect family example of how important flexibility or charity is in a family. It matters that we are long-suffering and not easily offended!
A young mother, forty years my junior, helped me out today. We have been talking about what it takes to be a writer and the necessity of getting up earlier. I got up at 4 am for six months in order to write my book. She has 3 kids all under 6, but she has been following through and writing in the morning at 6, for 30 minutes.
But me, I have been struggling to do the same, even though I did it in the past! In one of our conversations, this young mom did something brave. She shared some thoughts with me that have helped me overcome my resistance and self-sabotage. Join me and you will see how important it is to keep learning and how we never need to be ashamed of not knowing it all!
Back in 2013, when Jodie and her family moved into our three-bedroom apartment while looking for a new home, I was reminded of many things I had forgotten since my children had grown up and moved away. It takes flexibility to manage a family. Things don’t always go the way you plan, and moving forward when things aren’t just what you want, well, that is the road to feeling good as a family. Here is a peek back to that ‘learning’ time. By the way, Jodie was homeschooling Maggie and Jack and bringing Mary on board. It was a big load!
Join me as I show you what 'Just Do It' looks like in a family. You're gonna love this!
When we moved from Montana to Utah we helped our daughter purchase her first home. We lived in that home with her for a while. Then she married, and we moved two blocks away. Not long after that Maggie, our granddaughter with CP, was born.
After a few years, Jodie’s family needed a more handicapped-accessible home, and voila, we were eight people in a smallish 3-bedroom apartment. This was a precursor to living with them, in a three-generation home, which was a precursor to living in a four-generation home when we added my mom. From this article, you will know that when we made these life-altering decisions, we didn’t do it blindly. LOL
Join me as I share a small moment in our parenting saga. You will enjoy it and learn something too.
In the next four weeks, I am going to be sharing articles I wrote over ten years ago. Why? Because they were fun, contained great information and when I reread them, I fell in love with my family all over again. I will have a current introduction to each article, but I‘m not going to adjust the information to make it appear that it is in the now. You will see people and situations as they were over a decade ago.
You know, I have been in the parenting trench for a long time. I raised my own seven and then I moved into a three-generation home. I didn’t have that 24/7 responsibility but I was still surrounded by children and the challenges, joys, and learning that come with that territory.
Now, I am in a four-generation home. It just goes on and on. LOL I think I was made for this and although sometimes I would like to be in a home with just me, Don, and quiet, well, I would miss out on much, and I would learn far less. So, enjoy these lessons from the past and the cute kids who taught them to me.
Today take a stroll down memory lane as I give you the perfect example of how children learn best and why hearing their interest matters,
Over the last twenty years, I have run across wonderful resources. Today I want to share an article that I read back in 2013. It was by Kerry Patterson. I enjoy reading his stuff because it is always fun and illuminating. In this article Kerry outlines the parent or teacher’s job of establishing an environment where their charges can learn and grow (even experiment) without fear of being in trouble. Whether you school your children at home or they attend public or private school, we all are teachers to our kids every day! You are going to love this!
Today I am sharing a remarkable story from the book Remember the Ice and other Paradigm Shifts by Bob Nicoll. It will open your eyes to the importance of using words well. Understanding truth changes lives and Bob understood words. Hearing his story and reading his book will change your life too.
Let's talk about the challenges of growth and change. Join me as I show you how my meat chopper got me thinking about how change can be made and how we can discern when to make changes and when to walk away. You will be enlightened and heartened.
In August 2010 I wrote an article that I posted on my original blog, Home School Coach. It was titled I Don’t Run. In the article, I shared why I had begun running and why it wasn’t working out well.
It’s funny, but the reasons that I was having such a hard time running have been resolved over the last thirteen years. I have made many changes in my lifestyle and my thinking since 2010.
When you have a strong enough purpose, belief, or why, you can do and change anything. I have lived this truth and I want to share some real-life examples with you.
If you need to make changes in your lifestyle, family environment, the systems you use, relationships, or anything else that has you stymied, then join me and I will help you get moving toward success.
20232 was a very HARD year for me. I told why in last week's podcast, Tracking Can Turn Your Life Around. today I want to flesh that story out by sharing what I heard in church on January 8, 2023. It illuminates why we struggle and how we can manage better. Join me as I explore how we can live a happier, more satisfying life by being willing to embrace the struggle.
When we’re trying to implement a new system, create a new habit, change our way of being, or resolve a problem, tracking is helpful.
I know this doesn’t sound fun or doable for many of you, but I have learned the hard way that tracking makes a difference in how well I do in any of the above scenarios.
Tracking helps with consistency. You can see at a glance how you are doing and, in fact, if you are doing.
When you track you can’t pretend that you are doing better than you are. You also can’t delude yourself that you aren’t doing enough. It becomes clear if a family system is working or needs to be revamped. You can tell if your behaviors are modifying, or if you're responding differently than in the past.
Join me as I share some stellar examples of tracking and how it can make a huge difference in your success level. Tracking can turn your life around!
In February 2022 my daughter and I were having a conversation about taking care of ourselves and managing stress. It cam eup because she is learning to live a good life with depression and I was feeling down from four years of caregiving.
We shared our list of what we do to manage the tough days with each other. In this podcast, I share those lists with you. I think you will find their contents enlightening. Enjoy!
Today I am sharing a very silly, frustrating, and classic story of every day in the box thinking. when we get in the box it can mess with our relationships and our parenting. Join me today and see if you can relate. I know you will and the tips at the end will help you get out of the box. : )
"This year, choose to suffer less. Choose to remain in control of your stories. Write them in your mind in a way that lifts you, no matter what happens. You are 100% in control of your response to whatever comes your way. You can’t control everything that happens or how others behave, but you can control your response."
Join me as I share a beautiful and moving story that illustrates this truth perfectly.
Ever have an experience that isn't fair and made your life so much harder? My sister recently had one of those BUT she maintained control of her story and her results were nothing less than extraordinary. Join me as I share what happened and some tips for having better outcomes when life doesn't go as planned. Taking control of your story and how you respond makes ALL the difference.
My husband, Don, began watching a series titled Limitless. Chris Hemsworth, of Thor fame, was concerned about his health and aging and went looking for answers as to how to maintain longer.
After Don watched the first episode he said to me, “Mary, I need you to watch this with me because I think it will help me.” I sat with him as he rewatched the first episode in the six-part series. Frankly, I was interested in this for myself because when you are a full-time caregiver and one of the people has dementia, well, there is stress. : )
Join me today as we explore what it takes to stress-proof your life. Understanding this valuable concept can extend your years, free you from illness, increase your ability to be present in the moment, overcome obstacles, and frankly, be a better parent.
The other day I lost a glove and walked all over the place looking for it. When I found it I was right back where I had put on the first glove. It had been right at my feet. I could have saved myself all that searching.
Has this sort of thing ever happened to you? It has to me, and not just in little things like a missing glove.
Join me as we explore how to know when you need outside intervention as you problem-solve and when stillness, thought and reflection are what you need.
Many of you have been with me for some time now. We’re friends in learning. We’re seekers together. I want to thank you for the past few years of association by giving you some real tools to make next year better.
Start by saying NO to ineffective New Year's Resolutions!!
Join me as I share REAL tools that can help you have a far better new year.
A few years ago I came home and on the counter was my blender…filled with flowers. I loved the flowers but I couldn’t understand why they were in the blender!!
Now in my past life, this is what would have happened when Don got home: Hi Don. Thanks for the flowers. They’re beautiful but why did you put them in the blender? Anyway, thank you for the flowers. I love them.”
Ladies, does this scenario sound familiar to you? I am sure it does. Fortunately, I had time to think this through before Don got home and I am old enough to have been down this road many times in the past. I was looking for a new road! Here is what I realized...
Join me as I share examples of how we leave our family feeling unappreciated and three ways that we can use to be more grateful and kind in the coming year and still get our needs met.
Think back to your favorite memories as a child. What are they? Who or what are the most distinct elements of those memories?
As parents, we spend a great deal of time worrying about whether we’re measuring up, and whether we’re doing anything that our children will remember with fondness. And because we worry about this we tend to complicate things, create more work for ourselves and even spend money that isn’t necessary.
Join me as I share the childhood memories that mattered the most to seven adults and see how simple and part of daily life they were.
Today I am sharing three real-life examples of how we let what isn't perfect sabotage our enjoyment of our relationships and experiences in our families. It doesn't have to be this way. Join me as we talk about how not to let expectations mar the joy of what is.
I inherited 100 pounds of yarn which were in a tangled mess. Join me as I share four tips I learned in that untangling process that will help you untangle the problems in your family and relationships.
When the work of untangling the yarn was finished, I knew from experience that creating items of beauty would be much easier and, frankly, a joy. As we untangle each misunderstanding or difference of opinion in our family, it will be easier to create a family built on trust, respect, hard work, and love. Ultimately, we will have more joy in our families.
Like the yarn, wrapped in neat balls ready to use, our families will look better, feel better and be easier to live and work in. We can create something beautiful and lasting.
Controlling the story we tell ourselves about what is happening can help us control how we feel and ultimately how we respond. A better response gives us a better outcome. We are able to remain calm and kind.
Many of you may have a difficult time accepting you can control how you feel by taking charge of the story you tell yourself.
Join me as I share a number of experiences that opened my eyes to the truth that our story can and does create how we are going to feel and in turn how we will respond to problems. We have control over our response!
If you hated cats and dogs do you think it possible to become their friends? Well, I did just that and in the process confirmed what I know about the power of our story. Join me as I share my experience and how it can impact your family relationships for good.
My sister is a very overworked schoolteacher! The other day she was lamenting how hard it was to find time to relax and rest. She is at school from 7:30 until four thirty and sometimes later. Then there are papers to grade and she still has a family to feed and a home to run. A few weeks ago she asked me how I find time for R&R.
Join me as I share how you can find time for a little R & R right where you are, in the midst of the chaos of family. You will be glad you did. : )
Have you had the experience of trying to have a conversation with a child or youth and despite your good intentions or best efforts it goes south? I have had those moments. Talking with kids is a skill and we can all get better at it. Here are six tips that will help you be a better conversationalist when it comes to youth and children.
Would you like a perfect example of what it looks like in real life to control your story? Would you appreciate hearing how important being able to reach out for what you need is when it comes to living a better life? If so, join me as I share what happened last Saturday.
Do you berate yourself when you find a weakness or realize you have wounds to heal? Do you feel like a bad mom because your lack of skills makes you imperfect at the job? Join me as I share my story and a fifty-year journey to heal and learn. I am also sharing what I need now and how I found the courage to seek it and then share it with you. : )
Join me as I share two hard lessons I learned while parenting my seven children. Finally accepting them and implementing them into my life changed the way I parented. They can help you parent better and with more presence.
In September, I took a rest. I had traveled to Colorado in late August to help a daughter having surgery and was repeating that trip for the same reason early in September. I knew I was going to need a rest. The truth is I would like an even longer rest. You are moms so you know what I am talking about. LOL
However, consistency is a hallmark of my life. I have found that it is a principle of power. I also keep commitments to myself and others. I told you I would be back the first Sunday of October. : ) With that in mind, I am back.
Today I am sharing an article I read years ago, written by one of my favorite authors. It had a powerful lesson to teach – it is the parent or teacher’s job to establish an environment where children can learn and grow (even experiment) without fear of being in trouble.
I was not this kind of mom, and it took me decades to begin to scratch the surface of this lesson. I want you to receive the lesson, even though it is still a work in progress for me at seventy-two, although I have made long strides in the right direction. It will hearten you, challenge you, and, if internalized, help you be a more present parent. I hope you enjoy and learn as much from Kerry Patterson’s story as I did when I read it back in 2008.
Do life’s distractions get YOU off schedule? Why don’t lists and schedules work for most families?
The family chunk clock is unique because it is organized around tasks rather than time.
It works because it doesn’t matter if you get up late, have an emergency phone call after breakfast, or just want the day off! It is powerful because it is a system designed to help you RETURN when you get off course. It works because it is about how your family time feels rather than ticking off a list of tasks.
This audio will introduce you to a new, highly effective way to look at time management in a busy family.
Last week I was visiting a mom and her nineteen-year-old son. What they shared about my impact on Jordan, the nineteen-year-old blew me away. It was another reminder that being imperfect doesn't lessen our impact for good. Join me and enjoy Jordan's story and a few others. It will hearten you. : )
Recently, I was sitting at my desk in the corner of my bedroom. My husband was sitting on the bed watching me. Then he said, “Looking at you in your corner is an indication of your life.”
That was an interesting comment. I asked, "In what way?" He said, "It shows your willingness to change and grow. Most people don't have a corner like that."
That short conversation was thought-provoking. Join me as I share the value of having spaces in your home that give an indication of who you are and how you are growing.
Being with kids puts you under a microscope where you can clearly see all your weaknesses and strengths. Unfortunately, we often focus on the weaknesses we see. Join me today as I share some NOT PERFECT grandparenting and some REALLY NOT PERFECT grandparenting. Then I will show you how it is the same in parenting and that being not perfect and even really not perfect doesn't erase the great.
You will love the examples and you will relate. You will be uplifted!!
Have you, as a mother, felt bad because you didn't fulfill a dream you had as a child? Do you ever look at the things you are good at and dismiss them because, well, it's just cooking or cleaning or being a good listener? Join me as we explore what talent is, how you get good at them, and why what you are already good at counts.
I have had the privilege of working with moms all over the country who are helping other mothers do a better job. These women have written and spoken on just about everything mothering.
A few years ago, Jenny Wise wrote an article for my homeschool site on how to help kids enjoy writing. Enjoying writing is essential no matter how your children are being educated.
No matter what age or writing skill set, your child is, age-adaptable exercises refine communication abilities. Today I share five creative writing methods children will enjoy while honing their writing talents. You can use them when traveling in the car while on vacation, for family activities, or on a rainy afternoon. Summer is a perfect time to begin working on writing skills for the upcoming school year.
I have a friend, Nicole. She was a solopreneur, and a single mom, who homeschooled her two boys. That was a load to carry, however, Nicole manages well. That wasn’t always the case.
She was feeling overwhelmed with the load she was carrying. She couldn’t do everything by herself, but she kept trying. This 'doing it all' led to days when she wasn’t her best with the boys. She would struggle to remain calm, school felt like a huge weight, and she let her clients infringe on time with her family. She couldn’t say no. She carried on like this for several years.
Eventually, Nicole learned some valuable lessons. Join me as I share Nicole's story and give you seven tips that will help you feel successful more often and less overwhelmed.
I got a text from a dear friend showing me how she was taking care of herself on a day when she hadn't had good sleep, had no car, and one of her children was sick. She also sent a very revealing photo of how you can learn to take care of yourself while in the thick of parenting. I share some funny examples and give you some simple suggestions. I know it will make a difference in how you care for yourself. Join me for a few laughs and some solid advice. : )
It can be tiresome and overwhelming to constantly explain the intricacies of money to your children. Even if you’re a seasoned parent, you might still be unsure of how to talk to your kids about finances. But don’t worry—there’s no right or wrong way to approach the issue.
Join me as I share some tips that will help you be better prepared to help your children become financially capable adults.
And for some links that will give you even more information, visit the blog at maryannjohnsoncoach.com There are a lot of great links in the body of the article. : )
Here are the words of a brand new stepdad. Kash has been doing the job of stepparenting for over eleven years since he wrote these words in June of 2011, for Father's Day. He was right on then and so he has done a wonderful job. His story is worth listening to.
I will also share nine tips from a professional on how to stepparent well. Listen on this Father's Day. You never know when you or someone you know will need the information. : ) Happy Fathers Day!
Here are some wise words and three tips from a father-to-be on how to be a better father. Over ten years have passed and he is still living those words of counsel. You will find them simple, doable, and worthwhile.
In 2011 I asked several fathers and grandfathers to share some of their feelings and experiences about fatherhood. My friend Darrell Hendriksen shared this story with me. I think this is where many busy fathers find themselves and it will be instructive. After all, parenting is about being present despite our busy-ness. Here is his story: This is his story. Enjoy!
We have all experienced trauma and wounds as we have traveled through life. Many of us have worked hard to heal. BUT what do you do when down the road a new layer of an old wound surfaces again? How do you stay out of victimhood and not feel like a failure that the whole package wasn't healed? How do you let go of this emotional weight? Join me as I share my own experience.
Can a clean bathroom help you be happier? YES! Join me as I share the connection between emotional weight and my bathroom. You will laugh because you will see yourself and you will recognize the weight. In this podcast, I am going to talk again about The Key - how to put down your emotional weight and also how to have a clean bathroom. You are going to LOVE it!
What is emotional weight? What does it look like in real life? Join me as we explore emotional weight and I share an example that will assist you to discover the emotional weight in your life.
On Mother's Day in 2012, my four daughters highjacked my old blog in order to give me a Mother's Day surprise, and it was a surprise. What was surprising to me was what had mattered to them as they grew, the gifts I had been able to give them despite my imperfect parenting. I never had supposed.
I have spent the last almost two decades helping other moms know that perfect isn't what their kids need. They need their mothers, flaws and all. They need moms who stay the course and grow themselves.
Join me as I share these four beautiful expressions of love from my daughters to me, their imperfect mom.
Do you struggle to be consistent? Consistency is a principle of power and it is a vital step in making changes in your life. I am the queen of consistency but it is a learned skill. I learned it and I have helped others acquire this skill. You can too. Join me as I share five tips that will get you on the road to becoming a queen of consistency yourself. This one thing will change your life. I promise!
Life doesn't always go as planned! When our oldest son was young, he became involved in drugs. Eventually, we had three other children become involved in drugs. We faced some challenging things. These were really tough times. In this episode, I share how even in the darkness, if we are doing our best, we can be a light to our children
Join me as I show you how it came right for us and how it can come right for you and your family, no matter your struggles.
As a parent, have you ever wondered how you could resolve issues in your home more creatively, so everyone was happy? Sometimes, to get what we need, it appears that someone else has to give up what they need, and often it is the parent. That can be so maddening!
When a situation arises that needs to be resolved, and we are faced with two choices that seem equally bad or unfair, that is called the Sucker's Choice, and if one is chosen, it will inevitably leave someone feeling wronged. Don't pick one of them. There is always a third alternative, and you can find it with a bit of creative problem-solving.
Join me as I discuss eight steps to help you become a more creative problem solver. I share a perfect example of what a sucker's choice looks like in real life. You will smile and probably say, "Oh man, I have been in situations like that!" It is worth a listen, and I hope you will.
Here's to a better solution, happier relationships, and greater peace as a parent.
Do you have clarity on what it is you really want to accomplish in life, in your family? Join me as I share an experience that taught me, the hard way, how important it is to sift through all the voices and know what it is you really want. It will save you much wasted energy and will help you have what it is you really want.
You are busy mama but I'll bet you have some dreams that you would like to see come to pass. Maybe they seem impossible in your current life. I know how you feel. BUT I have discovered eight dream goals that have come to pass in my life as I have raised my family. Come spend some time with me as I share what they were, how they came to pass, and how you too can have your beloved dream goals!
A mother asked me how I handled it when my children wanted to make something that I knew wouldn’t be used after it was created. How did I feel about the waste of resources and the mess that would be left? That is a great question. In fact, this same question comes up often when I am working with moms, and I have put some thought into it and decided that an even better question would be:
“How do we determine when materials are being well used and when are they being wasted and if the mess will be worth it?”
Join me as we explore the answer to this question and why it is a challenge for adults to let kids waste i.e. create.
One day a mom said to me - "I want all my ducks in a row. You know, to be on top of my game.” So I asked what being on top of her game and having all her ducks in a row would look like."
It wore me out just hearing the list. I know that thinking about the list was wearing her out. It was in her voice. So I asked her, “Well, what do you think God would say if you asked Him what it meant to have all your ducks in a row and to be at the top of your game.”
Join me as I share how her list changed and how changing how we think of having our 'ducks in a row' can change you and your family.
Join me as I share an experience that I had with my grandson, Ben. As I share his joy and my trepidation we will explore the value of saying yes more often as we create memories and build relationships.
A young mother called me in tears and asked, "How can I find time for my own education with all the hats I have to wear? I could relate. I experienced that as a mother of seven and now as a full-time caregiver in a four-generation home.
Listen in as I share four tips on how to keep your brain active and your knowledge growing when formal education is not your season.
When I went to Seattle to watch three little gands eveyone thought I was the most perfect grandma becuase of the fun posts I made. BUT I wasn't perfect. No one can be. Join me as I share my expereinces and what I have leanred about 'perfect parenting' over the last seventy-two years.
I have been thinking back to 2015. In February of that year, I had a friend who turned 111. You read that right, 111! She lived with her daughter, who was 87. Anna was in good health and could get around with her walker; she bathed herself, fed herself, and was as sharp as a tack. Anna is gone now, but caring for my mom, who is turning 91 in March, made me think back to some important things I learned about management vs. relationship from Anna and her daughter.
Join me for an interesting story and five tips to help you have better relationships with your children. This is a Do Not Miss podcast. : )
I have noticed that my expectations are the thing that gets me into the most trouble. If what I think should happen doesn't, I have a hard time enjoying what is.
Adults care about the product or outcome. This sets us up for frustration, disappointment, and sometimes anger when things don't go as planned. Kids, on the other hand, care about the process. They are interested in what they are doing and learning. They like the paint's feel, the clay's denseness, the cool dirt in the garden. They want laughter and mini-conversations.
Join me as we explore real-life examples on both sides of this fence and ultimately learn that Time spent isn't just worthwhile if everything goes well. All the time we spend with our children matters, both in the good times and not-so-good times.
I had a call with a friend recently and it became clear that I had made some progress on making changes in my way of being. Cool! Then she asked me about my goals. As a three-year, full-time caregiver I hadn’t given a thought to goals. Just getting through the day seemed like all I could do. BUT goals just came out of my mouth. They were inside me despite the chaos of the last few years.
You have goals inside you too. I didn’t write this article to give you some stellar ideas on how to get your goals accomplished. It was written to show you that everyone struggles with this. There is no EASY when it comes to having goals and making them happen. It is a process. Let’s explore how to get them out despite the chaos of life.
Wise people seek wise counsel. We don’t and can’t know everything. We lack skills. It is life. I know, I have lived this. BUT there are a number of resources, both free and for a fee, that can help us learn and gain skills so that we parent better. I wasn’t exempt from the need to face myself and grow and neither are you. Join me as we dig deep and explore how we can go about finding the wise counsel we need.
It is tough if you have a job, work from home, or are a solopreneur to leave work at work so you can focus on your family. I know, I have been there. Today I want to share an episode from the Equalizer on television that illustrates a fabulous tip on how to leave work at work. I hope you join me. It will be family transforming!
I have a friend, Ann, who has taught children with special needs for 16 years. I have been in her classroom, and she is terrific. But this year, she retired, and her kids miss her.
We were talking recently about her retirement. 2020 was tough because they could not touch the kids because of Covid. Remember that these are special needs kids, and there was no hugging, no touching, no patting backs, or rubbing shoulders. No sitting by the kids, no connection. WOW! She said that by mid-year, her class was chaos. There were more tantrums, arguments, and problems than she had experienced in her fifteen previous years.
Then she made an executive decision. She decided that she would touch the kids. She would wear a mask, but she would physically connect. Guess what happened?
Join me for a discussion of the importance of physical and how you can do more of it in your busy life with your children. When you improve the skill of randomly touching your kids you will be astounded at the impact it will have on your relationships!
Have you ever wanted a gift for Christmas that you knew you wouldn’t receive? Have you ever been asked to give something away that you loved? Has your parent ever helped you fill the void by teaching you about love, generosity, and the importance of dignity for all? This podcast is about all of that and more. Thank you for joining me and Merry Christmas.
What do you do when you think you have broken a relationship that matters, especially if that relationship is with your child? Many years ago, I found myself in that very position. I had hit my fourteen-year-old daughter in the shoulder with my fist, hard!
Join me as I share that experience and what I learned about damaged relationships and the possibility of healing them.
When I was writing my book, Becoming a Present Parent: Connecting with your children in five minutes or less, I did some unscientific research on what makes a lasting memory. I asked my adult children and their spouses what their fondest memories were from childhood. I also put the question to my daughter-in-law, siblings, cousins, nieces, and nephews. Not one respondent mentioned a fancy toy, a fancy vacation to a memorable place, name-brand clothes, a cool car the family had, the size of their home, or where their home was. No one mentioned the great lessons or classes they took. No one said Little League or other teams they played on. Not one.
What is it then that our children will remember with the most fondness? Join me as I share what I have learned over five decades. I will also share a few tips on how to help create the memories that matter most.
A few years ago, I mentored a mom who has four children. I had known this woman for a while, and we were friends. She is a great mom and a wonderful person. At one of our sessions, we talked about her relationship with her 17-year-old daughter. They were at odds and avoided one another.
With help from some thoughtful questions I posed, this mom was able to design an experiment that radically shifted the energy and connection in their relationship.
Join me as we learn about the value of experiments in your home. I will also share a list of questions that can make all the difference.
I read an article comparing play-based curriculum with skill-based curriculum. What I found interesting were the points it made about the value of play for all children and the benefits of a play-based curriculum. In the world of education, there seems to be a bit of controversy about letting children play, when, where, how much, and with what. Today I want to share some of the insights from the article with you because I think you will find them interesting too. I hope they get you thinking about your children’s need to play, in order to learn important skills and do well in college or any other structured, people-filled environment.
From a Wall Street Journal article - “Americans’ scores on a commonly used creativity test fell steadily from 1990 to 2008, especially in the kindergarten through sixth-grade age group…” Children today seem to have a harder time being creative. Why is that? Some think that it is too much screen time and others that the schools are failing to inspire and allow creativity. As a parent and grandparent, I have seen this trend.
Join me today and let’s take a look at five ways that you can encourage and support creativity and creative thinking in your home with your kids. From my experience, I know that raising creative children is an experience worth having. I even share a delightful example of that adventure from my own family. So come join me.
Parents and children's brains don't work the same. Children and adult brains see or process learning differently. Many scientists believe play is hard-wired. Decades of research have shown that play is crucial to physical, intellectual, and social-emotional development at all ages.
Join me as we explore what play is and what it isn’t, why it is important, and what executive function is. Without good executive function, kids cannot become successful adults, and it all hinges on play.
It might surprise you to know that when child development experts talk about "critical thinking skills" and "creative problem-solving abilities," they refer to the imagination. That is what our imagination helps us to do. So how do we help our children use their imagination? Let's talk about it and I will share five tips to help you help your kids.
In last week's podcast, I gave you an example of what it looks like when our thoughts generate negative stories and how this affects our happiness level. Today I want to share another example and give you six tips to help you get control over the stories that impact your life. I also want to offer you a free worksheet that can help you master this work of taking charge of your thoughts.
Join me as I share an experience that will help you understand what it means when I say, "Our stories shape our lives." When we understand and believe this to be true it is life-changing!
Technology has been a boon in so many ways. I am amazed at how well versed my nine-year-old grandson is in the use of technology. I watch other kids, and I am equally impressed. But technology, for kids, also has downsides. Join me as we talk about the downside and look at three ways you can begin to take back control of technology use in your life and home.
While working in my field I had two experiences that taught me about the importance of focus and light. They also taught me that we cannot be perfect in either. This impacts our parenting in some significant ways. Join me as we explore this issue of focus and light. I want to help you see that despite your imperfect parenting, it will be enough!
When you are Present you will be able to see what is 'sparking' your child, what is interesting to them now. Let's explore some ways that will help you hone in on what your child is interested in that you can use to help them use to enjoy learning.
Explore with me 10 ways that parents and teachers can help children retain their innate love of learning.
When we are angry with our child or family we can justify our actions easily enough. BUT is there a deeper truth. Join me as I share how an experience with my mom, who has Alzheimer's, taught me to ask the important question - Is there a deeper truth. Learning to ask this question can improve your parenting.
Are myths about sleep keeping you tired? Is a lack of sleep keeping you from being the parent you want to be? Join me today and we bust some sleep myths and I give you two ways to begin getting better sleep today.
There are times when we don’t see what is right in front of us. We may behave in unhealthy or damaging ways to our family or ourselves and not even know it. We do what we have always done.
This happens in life, in parenting. Wouldn’t it be nice to have all the information and knowledge we need no matter what came up? But we don't.
Join me as I share examples of working in the dark and how we can get enough illumination to make changes. We do not need to work in darkness where we cannot see the details. Light can be ours, and it will lead us to change and growth. Really!!
There are some great reasons that grandparents can have a positive impact on their grandchildren. Join me as we talk about how grandparents can impact their grands for good.
I am a BIG proponent of family reading because of its many benefits. When our kids were living at home, we read together. I wasn’t consistent, but we did manage to do it often enough that one of my daughters would say years later, “Mom, it was so great how you always read to us.” However, I wasn’t prepared for the HUGE impact reading together has had on our household of three, all of us over seventy. Join me as I share the impact for good it has had in our family of three, all over 70.
Then I will share six important reasons you should read as a family. They can impact your family in major ways.
When I mentor moms, I hear about all the things that aren't working. That is what they come to me for – for perspective, to see with new eyes. I enjoy this process of sorting it out. We often begin with family systems, so things start to work better.
Most feel they lack systems but the truth is, they have systems by default. What does that look like and how can you have more intentional systems. Join me for a closer look at how systems can and do impact your family and how to have more intentional systems.
This is audio is from a video I made for Christine Ownes, owner of Little Rabbit Trails. Each April she has a poetry contest and she asked me to share how reading as a family has impacted me. I share many nostalgic moments from my own family and from when I was a child about the magic of reading together. Enjoy.
In my life, I have cleared two fields. One mattered a great deal because lives depended on it. The other matters only because it confirmed all the lessons from the first.
If you are struggling in any way, take this story to heart. Please pay attention to the lessons I have learned and implement them into your situation. If you do, although it may not be perfect, you cannot fail.
You can clear your field!
My sister has anxiety about flying, but she wanted to see her son and she needed to go by plane. Although she loved her time with family, the going and coming was stressful. When she got home she said, “Home is a refuge. It is a safe place to be. The place where you can rest and feel peace.”
On this podcast, we are going to learn about a skill, that when practiced, will help you create a more peaceful refuge for your family - active listening. Active listening is about connection and can go a long way in helping your home feel peaceful and safe.
Are you ever faced with a situation that needs a resolution but the choices you see seem unfair or damaging? If you choose one despite not liking either option, that is called The Suckers Choice, and when made, it will inevitably leave someone feeling wronged. The Suckers Choice is almost always bad for relationships, including the one with ourselves.
In this podcast, I will share an illuminating example of a sucker's choice and the process for coming up with creative solutions for real and frustrating situations.
Recently I saw an article titled - Self Care is More than a Bathroom. I laughed because the bathroom has been part of my self-care for over 50 years. We are going to spend far more time with our kids than without them so learning to care for yourself while in the thick of parenting is going to matter!
Join me as I share four reasons you need to learn to care for yourself and four ways to do it while in the thick of parenting.
Want to feel like a thousand bucks even on the crazy, I didn't get anything done days? Join me and let's talk about simple morning and evening routines.
Some people think that if kids create they need to make something useable and be neat and orderly or the materials were wasted. Join me as I give two vivid examples of how kids used materials differently and ultimately what they learn when we let them create without so many adult boundaries.
Recently I was at a funeral and an old friend from my high school days was there. We haven’t seen each other for many years, but she reads what I post on Facebook.
We had a delightful time visiting, reminiscing, and then she said, with a sigh, “You are such a good grandma. You do so much with the kids, and you are always so upbeat and cheerful.” Nice, right?
Wrong. I heard what my friend was saying, and I appreciated her words. But I also knew what she was thinking – “You are doing so much better than I am.”
Let's talk about why this is a problem and how to correct it.
One day, after church, someone said to me, "I am so inspired." In my heart, I responded, "Inspired to what end." It isn't enough to be inspired. We must be moved to action.
This audio covers some of the reasons we don't move to action and nine tips to help you overcome inertia and achieve results.
Amazing things are accomplished with small steps, done consistently over time. This applies to losing weight, conquering an illness, parenting kids, improving rocky relationships, learning a new skill, or changing our way of being. It doesn’t matter what it is. It all requires the same initial work, one small step.
It isn't always easy to find that initial step and then to remain consistent. Join me today as I share a story that will give you some encouragement to not quit if you are facing a mountain.
I received a gift on my birthday from my oldest daughter that would warm the heart of any mother, especially any mother who felt she hadn't done as good a job as she had hoped. If you are a mom who worries that what you do and how you do it are enough then this episode will calm your troubled heart and give hope to your efforts, as imperfect as they may be.
I come from an extended family of complainers and criticizers. I never knew that because how we were seemed ordinary to me. We weren't mean to each other. We could be generous and kind, but there was a lot of complaining, and we were critical.
I mentioned this to a friend one day, and she said, "Well, that's just normal." It is normal, but it isn't helpful if we want our lives to feel more joyful and successful.
Join me as we explore what it looks like to jettison both.
A friend of mine said, "The problem with your book is it's so simple. I loved it when I read it, and it was all so doable. Then two months later, in an overwhelmed moment, I asked myself, 'Can it really be this simple.'" I laughed. I have asked myself the same thing over the years.
Here is the rub - simple doesn't always equate to ways. That is what my friend was really saying – "I know it is simple, but it isn't always easy. I have to bend a bit. I am required to think differently. I must change."
Join me for a conversation on the value of doing the simple thing, even when it isn't easy.
Gratitude begins with attitude. Gratitude is a choice not based on what is happening to us, what we have or don't have, but on how we choose to see what is happening to us. Regardless of our circumstances, we all have much to be grateful for if we pause and contemplate our blessings.
Join me in this podcast and explore the science behind the value of gratitude and ten tools that can help you develop an attitude of gratitude. It will improve your life!
Sometimes I think back to when I was a child. There were good memories and sad ones. But the one thing I return to most often is the freedom I had. I'm not talking about the freedom to roam, although I had that. I’m talking about the space to sit, think, do nothing, or create without the knowledge in the back of my mind of other things that would eventually need to be tackled. There wasn't a to-do list that was always present.
In today's podcast, we will explore how to better manage the never-ending to-do list so that we can recover some of the mental and physical freedom we experienced as children.
Did you know that joy and happiness are born of gratitude? This is a lesson I have had to learn the hard way, over time, because raising a home full of children can be challenging!! Do you find yourself terribly grateful and ungrateful at the same time? This habit, and it is a habit, diminishes our joy and happiness.
Join me and let's talk about the importance of gratitude and how you can become more grateful even when things are hard.