The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast: Recent Episodes
Ken Cardita - Ascending Minds LLC
This podcast is the story of Ken and Shanna, a married couple who's lives have been forever changed (for the better) because we have learned to live with and ultimately survive Alzheimer's disease. We have learned many lessons in our 11+ year journey together down Dementia Road. Our mission is to help caregivers and families those who have been touched by Alzheimer's disease. We share our experiences on how we both eventually rediscovered joy and gained a peace that passes all understanding, all while dealing with our lifes' greatest challenge.
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Understanding Suffering in Alzheimer's Disease: A Caregiver's Perspective
In episode 47 of the Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast, host Ken Cardina delves into the topic of suffering, specifically examining whether or not his wife Shanna, who has Alzheimer's, is suffering. Drawing from a poignant conversation with his daughter, Ken explores both emotional and mental aspects of suffering in the context of Alzheimer's caregiving. He provides detailed insights into the various stages of Shanna's journey, their shift to memory care, and the differences in her well-being in two different facilities. Ken offers practical advice for caregivers on managing their own and their loved ones' emotional well-being, discussing concepts like fact vs. interpretation, the impact of belief systems, and the significance of positive responses to repeated questions. The episode also features a listener comment from Flo Garinger, highlighting the podcast's ongoing impact.
00:00 A Heartfelt Conversation with My Daughter
01:08 Introduction to the Podcast
01:53 Defining Suffering
02:28 Listener Comment and Feedback
03:32 Understanding Suffering in Alzheimer's
08:05 Reflecting on Shanna's Diagnosis
21:24 The Role of Memory Care Facilities
29:18 Dealing with Repeated Questions
30:29 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
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Overcoming Guilt and Cherishing Moments: A Caregiver's Summer Reflections
Ken shares heartfelt experiences from his summer, including celebrating his 45th wedding anniversary with his wife Shanna, who is battling Alzheimer's, Shanna's 65th birthday with her family, and a long overdue extended family vacation. Ken reflects on the emotional journey of transitioning from full-time caregiving to balancing family life, overcoming survivor's guilt, and finding joy amid challenges. He emphasizes the importance of addressing caregiver guilt, seeking support, and staying connected with family. Ken also shares how becoming a life coach has allowed him to help others navigate similar struggles, urging listeners to find the balance between responsibilities and self-care.
00:00 Episode Overview
01:16 Celebrating 45 Years of Marriage
09:23 Shanna's 65th Birthday Celebration
11:12 Family Vacation to Mission Beach
18:12 Planning a Cruise Vacation
20:52 Reflections and Moving Forward
22:42 Encouragement for Caregivers
24:54 Conclusion and Podcast Mission
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Changes - Turn and Face the Strange
In this episode of the Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast, host Ken reflects on nine years of retirement and his experiences as the primary caregiver for his wife, Shanna, who has Alzheimer's disease. Ken shares the challenges they faced after his retirement in 2016, including moving to a new house and adjusting to Shanna's cognitive decline. He discusses the emotional rollercoaster of caregiving, the importance of compassion, and how he learned to meet Shanna's needs without relying on logic and reasoning. Ken also emphasizes the healing power of time, faith, and community support. This episode aims to provide insight and encouragement for caregivers navigating their own journeys.
00:00 Reflecting on Nine Years of Retirement
00:47 Introduction to the Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast
01:27 Early Caregiving Challenges and Retirement
04:16 Downsizing and Moving Challenges
06:49 Adjusting to New Realities
10:07 Lessons Learned and Personal Growth
17:30 Embracing Emotions and Finding Peace
20:36 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
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EP 44 Advocating for Your Loved One
Ken shares his story of advocating for his wife Shanna, who has been living with Alzheimer's disease. Ken details the timeline of when he took over her medical and financial decisions, highlighting important moments like setting up power of attorney, adjusting to challenges during the COVID-19 pandemic, and navigating complex medical situations. He recounts specific instances of Shanna's health issues, such as her struggle with a tight quadricep and restless leg syndrome, and how these were managed through medication adjustments and homeopathic solutions. The episode underscores the importance of being proactive, working closely with medical professionals, and trusting one's instincts in managing the care of a loved one with dementia.
00:00 Introduction: Advocating for a Loved One with Dementia
01:12 Ken's Personal Journey: Legal Preparations and Early Challenges
02:23 Navigating Medical Care During the COVID-19 Pandemic
04:34 The Mystery of Shanna's Leaning and Muscle Issues
09:11 Discovering Restless Leg Syndrome and Medication Adjustments
13:36 The Importance of Advocacy and Personalized Care
15:58 Conclusion: Lessons Learned and Final Thoughts
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EP 43 Wondering Aloud - Lessons from Loss
Ken discusses coping strategies amid the loss of three fellow residents, reassures caregivers on managing personal guilt, and emphasizes the importance of supporting others. He offers practical advice on self-care, finding joy, and using diverse activities to break monotony. The episode aims to educate and inspire caregivers to balance their responsibilities while finding personal relief and fulfillment.
00:00 Introduction: Overwhelmed by Caregiving
01:15 Shanna's Restless Leg Syndrome Update
02:00 Coping with Loss in the Caregiving Community
08:37 Finding Comfort in Shared Experiences
10:09 Balancing Caregiving and Self-Care
14:18 Practical Tips for Caregivers
15:58 Conclusion: Finding Relief and Support
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Returning After a Break: Holiday Lessons and New Directions for 2025
In this episode of the Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast, host Ken Cardina returns after a three-month break to provide updates on his personal journey with his wife Shanna, who has Alzheimer's. Ken shares heartfelt moments of appreciation, his holiday experiences, the introduction of a wheelchair due to Shanna's mobility challenges, and their ongoing battle with Restless Leg Syndrome. He also hints at future plans for the podcast, including potential new content and classes tailored for caregivers. It's an episode filled with reflections, lessons learned, and new beginnings aimed at supporting those affected by Alzheimer's.
00:00 Introduction and Listener Appreciation
00:57 Podcast Update and Future Plans
03:06 Holiday Reflections and Lessons Learned
08:19 Shanna's Health and Mobility Challenges
12:54 Future Directions for the Podcast
15:53 Closing Remarks and Gratitude
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The Transformative Power of a Smile in Alzheimer's Care
In this episode of the Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast, host Ken Cardita discusses the profound impact a simple smile can have on individuals with Alzheimer's, drawing from his experiences with his wife, Shanna, and other residents at her care facility. Ken shares touching stories of connecting with non-responsive residents through smiles and the joy it brings to them and their families. He emphasizes the importance of caregivers and loved ones using smiles to comfort and uplift those with dementia, reflecting on his personal journey to becoming a habitual smiler despite his New York upbringing. Ken encourages listeners to embrace the power of a smile to foster love and happiness in their caregiving roles.
00:00 The Power of a Smile
01:15 Reflecting on the Journey
02:37 Smiles in the Late Stages of Dementia
04:15 Connecting with Residents
06:51 Cherished Memories and Loss
12:04 Shanna's Radiant Smile
13:06 The Impact of Smiling
13:49 Personal Transformation Through Smiling
15:04 Invitation to Smile and Conclusion
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Five Lessons Learned from My Caregiving Journey
In this episode, inspired by a listener's comment, Ken shares five crucial lessons he wishes he knew when he started his caregiving journey. These lessons include: stopping the urge to correct the loved one, letting go of guilt, recognizing that current struggles won't last forever, prioritizing self-care, and embracing your loved one's reality. Ken emphasizes the importance of finding joy in what the loved one can still do and cherishing those moments.
00:00 Introduction and Personal Reflection
01:30 Listener Comment and Episode Inspiration
02:08 Number 1 : Stop Correcting
04:23 Number 2 : Let Go of Guilt
06:29 Number 3 : This Too Shall Pass
09:01 Number 4 : Self-Care is Essential
11:38 Number 5 : Live in Their World
16:54 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
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Finding Hope Amidst Grief
In this 39th episode of the Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast, host Ken Cardita reflects on a challenging year and a poignant two-year anniversary of the podcast coinciding with his 44th wedding anniversary to his wife, Shanna.
Ken candidly shares his experiences dealing with sadness and grief, the impact of stepping back from full-time caregiving, and the emotional toll of watching his wife’s decline. He discusses the importance of maintaining connections, recounts a heartwarming celebration of their anniversary, and encourages listeners to find hope and cherish what remains of their loved ones.
01:40 Podcast Anniversary and Personal Reflections
02:20 Dealing with Sadness and Grief
03:45 Support Group Insights
06:32 Anniversary Celebration with Shanna
08:47 Struggling with Emotions and Finding Hope
13:35 Cherishing Moments and Looking Forward
19:45 Conclusion and Future Plans
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Easing Awkwardness: Helping Friends Stay Connected with Loved Ones with Alzheimer’s
In episode 38 of the Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast, host Ken Cardita delves into the challenges families face as friends become distant when a loved one progresses through Alzheimer's. Ken shares personal experiences and practical tips on how to manage these awkward interactions, ensuring friends stay connected. The episode covers the importance of openness about the disease, strategies to involve caregivers in social settings, and the creation of a supportive environment for both loved ones and their friends.
00:00 Introduction: Facing Isolation in Dementia
00:44 Welcome to the Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast
01:26 Episode 38: Easing Awkwardness in Friendships
01:48 Listener Review: A Shared Journey
02:58 Understanding the Stigma and Awkwardness
03:54 Being Open About the Diagnosis
05:26 Supporting Your Loved One in Social Situations
10:15 Encouraging Friends to Visit
12:51 Writing a Letter to Friends
17:22 Final Thoughts and Encouragement
18:20 Conclusion and Mission Statement
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Earlier this week marked the three-year anniversary of moving Shanna into memory care, Ken delves into his early caregiving days, his struggles with acceptance and understanding, and how his interactions and approaches to Shanna's care evolved through faith-based life coaching and self-discovery. He emphasizes the importance of self-change, acknowledging irrational emotions without argument, and fostering joy amidst hardships. Ken advocates for seeking support through coaching, counseling, or confiding in trusted friends or religious leaders to navigate the challenging journey of caregiving for loved ones with Alzheimer's or dementia.
00:36 A Different Episode: Reflecting on Three Years of Change
01:25 Discovering Old Journals: A Glimpse into the Early Days
04:05 The First Journal Entry: Dealing with Depression and Finding Solutions
07:08 Learning and Growing: Insights from Early Caregiving Challenges
12:34 Further Reflections and Progress: Embracing Change and Finding Joy
14:38 The Power of Coaching and Self-Reflection: Transforming Caregiving
18:51 Finding Joy Amidst the Struggle: A Message of Hope and Support
21:28 Closing Thoughts and the Mission of the Podcast
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EP 36 Getting the Dreaded Phone Call
Ken Cardita, the host of the Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast, narrates a story about his wife, Shanna, in this episode. He talks about his experiences pertaining to a behavioral change in his wife after she started living in a memory care facility due to Alzheimer's disease. He navigates concerns of getting the dreaded phone calls from the facility about Shanna being out of control, and even the fear of her getting expelled because of her conduct. He paints a picture of how the staff's mistreatment and even fellow residents ridiculing Shanna led to her fighting back instead of submitting. Sharing his journey of confrontation with the facility's management, he highlights the importance of standing up for a loved one who's not treated appropriately. During the course of the episode, the host advises his audience not to fear moving their loved ones to a better facility if necessary.
Topics covered in this episode :
- 00:00 Introduction: Dealing with New Behaviors in Loved Ones
- 02:00 Shanna's Early Life and Behavior Changes
- 03:44 Shanna's Transition to Memory Care
- 07:05 Challenges and Incidents in Memory Care
- 09:58 The Saga of Dora: A Caregiver assignment gone bad
- 13:17 Learning from Mistakes: Improving Care for Shanna
- 15:31 The Struggles of Shanna: Emotional and Verbal Abuse
- 16:42 A Change in Management: The Impact on Shana
- 18:21 The Downfall: Residents Asked to Leave
- 20:15 The Meeting: Discussing Shana's Future (avoiding getting kicked out)
- 24:24 The Move: Finding a New Home for Shana
- 27:36 The Aftermath: Reflecting on the Experience
- 29:00 The Lesson: Advocating for Your Loved One
- 29:57 Conclusion: Don't Be Afraid to Make a Change
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In this episode, Ken reflects on his healing journey so far and shares his experiences of being stuck in the process. He shares a pivotal realization about the importance of prioritizing his own emotional wellbeing and connecting with his family, even as he struggles with the pain and guilt of Shanna's deteriorating state. Using personal anecdotes, Ken emphasizes the need to seek and embrace healing, despite the reality of loss. He shares his experiences of healing through his Christian faith but is inclusive in inviting listeners of different beliefs to apply their own spiritual resources towards healing. The episode also illustrates the helpful role of familial advice, his determined effort to reconnect, and the power of focusing on positive experiences over pain in aiding his healing process.
Topics covered in this episode :
00:00 Introduction and Personal Healing Journey
00:42 Welcome to the Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast
01:20 Postponing Healing and Personal Experiences
04:04 The Impact of Family Gatherings
07:18 Realization and Decision to Move Forward
08:54 The Healing Process and Personal Growth
15:14 Reconnecting with Loved Ones
20:43 Conclusion and Invitation to Reflect on Your Healing Journey
21:34 Closing Remarks and Mission of the Podcast
-------------------------- LINKS -----------------------------
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- Get the FREE Guide to Responding to Repeated Questions
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EP 34 Reacting to Repeated Questions
This episode discusses the topic of dealing with repeated questions from loved ones with Alzheimer's disease. Ken Cardita shares his personal experiences and provides insights on why repeated questions occur, how caregivers can change their responses, and offers a free guide on the topic.
Topics covered in this episode :
- 00:00 Introduction and Welcome
- 02:06 Reflecting on the Podcast's Journey
- 03:48 Understanding Repeated Questions in Alzheimer's
- 04:59 The Emotional Impact of Repeated Questions
- 07:09 The Concept of Being Triggered
- 10:35 Taking Responsibility for Your Reactions
- 12:44 Improving Your Response to Repeated Questions
- 16:06 Removing Triggers and Reprogramming Your Brain
- 19:23 Conclusion and Invitation to Access the Free Guide
- 21:52 Final Thoughts and Farewell
-------------------------- LINKS -----------------------------
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- Get the FREE Guide to Responding to Repeated Questions
- Goto Ascending Minds LLC Website to Register for the Support Group, Newsletter and more ....
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EP 33 Are You Doing it Alone ?
In this episode, Ken Cardita discusses his own experience of narrowly escaping severe caregiver burnout while caring for his wife Shanna, who has Alzheimer's disease - a theme many caregivers dealing with loved ones with dementia will relate to. He unpacks the myth of having to do everything on one's own and shares how seeking help and overcoming his own initial resistance to asking for assistance led to more joy and less stress. Ken also details his and Shanna's journey through the various stages of Alzheimer's, offering insights on key learnings, regrets, and relief brought about by specific decisions. He elaborates on how various available resources and community support groups helped his own healing and recovery, encouraging listeners to do the same. The podcast also features a powerful testament to its impact from a listener who has benefited instantly from listening to these supportive episodes.
Topics covered in this episode :
- 00:00 Introduction and Personal Struggles with Caregiving
- 00:46 Podcast Introduction and Episode Overview
- 02:05 Listener's Feedback and Appreciation
- 04:06 Personal Story: The Lone Wolf Caregiver
- 07:34 The Realization: Caregiving Requires a Team
- 09:03 The Journey: Different Stages of Caregiving
- 14:49 Lessons Learned: What I Would Have Done Differently
- 18:53 Things I'm Grateful For: The Right Decisions
- 24:14 Where Are You on Your Journey? Getting Help
- 24:58 Free Resources for Caregivers
- 26:57 The Importance of Community and Support
- 30:20 The Power of Teaching and Learning
- 33:31 Appreciation for Podcast Listeners and Final Thoughts
- 35:29 Podcast Conclusion and Final Recommendations
-------------------------- LINKS -----------------------------
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EP 32 She is NOT the disease… She is still my wife
In this episode I share some of the most personal experiences that I have had in our journey down dementia road together. I share what I have learned that enabled me to move from a place of despair and depression over the loss of my best friend and wife back to a place where once again I feel eternally connected to her.
Topics covered in this episode :
- How feeling disconnected led to sadness and depression
- How getting help changed my perspective
- Share what I learned to enable me to see past the disease and begin to heal
- Share very special experiences that have had this year as I learned to reconnect with my best friend and wife
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EP 31 Looking Back and Moving Forward
It's been a year since I started the Surviving Alzheimer's podcast. In today's episode I reflect on the first year of the podcast as well as what I have learned in the last 12 months with my wife Shanna. l also make announcements on additional things that I have been working on that will soon be available.
Topics covered in this episode :
- Reflect on the first year of the Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast
- Share learnings from the last 12 months with my wife Shanna
- Discuss the Ascending Minds Coaches Corner Webinar
- Announcements:
- The Surviving Alzheimer’s Support Group
- Free Guidebook - How to Respond to Repeated Questions
- Upcoming Classes
-------------------------- LINKS -----------------------------
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* Click Here to REGISTER for the FREE "Coaches Corner " ***
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EP 30 They Call Me the Wanderer
Wondering is a serious concern for caretakers. Statistics show that 60% of those who have dementia will wander at least one time and many do it multiple times. This was something that I experienced with Shanna over the course of about 9 months. In this episode I will share our experiences and what I learned about helping to reduce the risk of wandering and what to do when your loved one wanders away.
Topics covered in this episode :
- Why our loved ones may be prone to wander and what to look for.
- Some tips on how to reduce the risk of wandering
- What to do when your loved one wanders
- Share our experiences when Shanna wandered multiple times and how we were blessed with God's intervention and protection of Shanna.
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EP 29 A Lesson in Triggers and Healing
In the "parable of the pool", I will tell how I was able to overcome two sets of triggers associated with building a swimming pool for Shanna after we moved into our current home. I will go over how I was able to remove these triggers and reprogram my brain to allow me to no longer be automatically triggered and to restore peace and joy in our relationship while I was taking care of Shanna at home.
Topics covered in this episode :
- I will illustrate that when triggers are left untreated they cause mental and emotional damage.
- Not only will I share the frustration and anger I felt, I will also share What enabled me to choose to let go of my way of thinking and ultimately free myself from all of the negative emotions.
- I will share the joy and the memories that were created as a result of removing my triggers.
- My hope is that you apply what you learn and free yourself of the negative emotions that you experience when you are triggered.
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EP 28 The Art of One Way Conversation
This episode focuses on different ways Alzheimer's can affect our loved ones Communication skills, especially their verbal skills. Over the last 4 years Shanna declined to the point of being non-verbal about 2 years ago. All along I have learned to adapt and miraculously stay connected to her.
Topics covered in this episode :
- How Alzheimer's affects verbal communication
- How we adjusted over the years
- What I have learned in talking with over 50 residents all with varying verbal abilities
- How I am able to stay connected to Shanna even though she rarely says a word.
-------------------------- LINKS -----------------------------
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EP 27 The Miracle of Music
Music has been a big part of mine and Shanna’s Life. In this episode I talk about how music has enabled Shanna and I to stay connected long after her ability to talk has faded away. I will also share my observations of how music is used in both of the memory care centers that Shanna has lived in over the last few years. I will also share some personal special moments that we have had because we chose to allow music to move us,
Topics covered in this episode :
- The transformational power of music to penetrate dementia
- How I used music to calm down an agitated loved one
- How music created very special moments that created memories that will last a lifetime
- How you can easily make a world of music available to your loved one
-------------------------- LINKS -----------------------------
Link to post a comment on this episode
* Click Here to REGISTER for the FREE "Coaches Corner " ***
Click to Learn more about Ascending Minds LLC
EP 26 Men Who Care
Men Who Care is a caregiver support group that I have belonged to for over 2 years. It is sponsored by the Banner Alzheimer's Institute in Phoenix. It has been one of the most helpful resources that I have encountered in our journey. My only regret is that I waited way too long to join a the group. I hope that as I discuss my experiences with participating in a support group that it will inspire you to consider joining a support group in your area.
Topics covered in this episode :
- Why was I hesitant to join a group?
- What was holding me back?
- What my experience was in the first meeting
- How has my involvement evolved over 2 years
- How this has helped me as well as allowed me to help others
-------------------------- LINKS -----------------------------Link to post a comment on this episode
* Click Here to REGISTER for the FREE "Coaches Corner " ***
Click to Learn more about Ascending Minds LLC
EP 25 Shanna’s Sisters visit
In this very personal episode, I share the recent experience when 4 of Shanna’s sisters flew in for a visit. It had been about 2 years since their last visit. I will tell how at first it was difficult for Shanna to connect with her sisters and then with a bit of inspiration something amazing happened.
Topics covered in this episode :
- The importance of our loved one reconnecting with their family
- Details of the 3 day visit and dealing with a few bumps along the way
- I will summarize and share lessons that I learned during the visit
- A special invitation
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The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast is now also in YouTube.
To watch Episodes with video click on this link or search for "The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast" in the YouTube search bar.
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EP 24 Conquering FEAR
In this very personal episode, I share my recent experience of how over the last few weeks and months I was able to conquer a debilitating fear that led to bouts of deep depression. I will share details of how my wife has begun to decline physically and how it affected me. I will finally share how I was able to coach myself through this difficult time and return to a state of peace.
Topics covered in this episode :
- A recent real life personal battle with Fear
- Details of my wifes physical decline over the last 6 months
- How Fear led me to being depressed
- Using a Fact vs Interpretation coaching exercise I was able to begin to conquer the fear
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Link to post a comment on this episode
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page.
The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast is now also in YouTube.
To watch Episodes with video click on this link or search for "The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast" in the YouTube search bar.
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EP 23 FEAR Don’t let it hold you hostage - Part 2
In part 2 of our discussion about Fear we will look at a type of fear called “fight fear”. This type of fear can often show up as anger.
I will share a few of my experiences in dealing with the common type of fear
Topics covered in this episode :
- We review the different types of fear as well as some of the more common sources of fear you may face as a caregiver.
- I will share a few of my struggles in the past and how I dealt with them.
- We will look at ways we can take action and move past the fear and sometimes have a sense of joy restored.
-------------------------- LINKS -----------------------------
Link to post a comment on this episode
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page.
The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast is now also in YouTube.
To watch Episodes with video click on this link or search for "The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast" in the YouTube search bar.
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EP 22 FEAR Don’t let it hold you hostage - Part 1
When was the last time you experienced joy with your loved one ?
If it's been a long time, do you find yourself frozen with fear from what lie ahead for your loved one ?
Does it feel as if you are always waiting for the other shoe to drop ?
In this episode we will take a look at a few different kinds of fear and how we can face them head on.
Topics covered in this episode :
We identify the different types of fear as well as some of the more common sources of fear you may face as a caregiver.
- We will take a look at how FEAR tends to hold us hostage.
- I will share a few of my struggles in the past and how I dealt with them.
- We will look at ways we might reframe our perspective, contain our fear and start to move past it.
-------------------------- LINKS -----------------------------
Link to post a comment on this episode
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page.
The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast is now also in YouTube.
To watch Episodes with video click on this link or search for "The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast" in the YouTube search bar.
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EP 21 Caregiver Self Care - Let’s Get Started !
As we care for our loved ones with dementia, it can take a heavy toll on our physical and mental health. Today we will go over some ways on how you can start to take better care of yourself. This will ensure you can have the energy and mental stamina to take care of your loved one without sacrificing your own health and sanity.
At the end of this episode I also have an announcement on some exciting changes that will come to this podcast in the near future.
Topics covered in this episode :
- Expose the most common myths and lies that you might be telling yourself about caregiver selfcare
- I share personal struggles and how I dealt with them
- Practical advice that worked for me and how you may apply it to your situation
-------------------------- LINKS -----------------------------
Link to post a comment on this episode
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page.
The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast is now also in YouTube.
To watch Episodes with video click on this link or search for "The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast" in the YouTube search bar.
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EP 20 Caregiver Burnout is Real !
Today we will talk about the often harsh reality of caregiver burnout . We will review the consequences of what studies have revealed about caregivers who do not maintain their health while caregiving.
We will discuss the 10 symptoms of caregiver stress. I will tell you some stories from my journal when I was stressed and what I did to attempt to release that stress. I will also share some resources where you may be able to find online and local help to relieve your caregiver stress.
By the end of this episode you will be able to assess how stressed you are and If you are on the path to caregiver burnout.
Topics covered in this episode :
- Alarming statistics of the consequences of ignoring Caregiver Stress
- What are the 10 most common symptoms of Caregiver Stress?
- Share some lessons learned on my journey and what I did to relieve Caregiver stress.
- I will coach you on the process of how to relieve Caregiver Stress that has been proven to get results.
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Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page.
The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast is now also in YouTube.
To watch Episodes with video click on this link or search for "The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast" in the YouTube search bar.
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EP 19 What a Year it has been
As I have been reflecting on this year (2022) and the many changes that have occurred, I had a chance to have 2 very deep and lengthy discussions regarding the journey that I have been on.
I will share some things that came up in these discussions that helped me to see not only the last year but our entire Alzheimer’s journey from a new perspective. I think you may find some useful insights from my friends who are fellow travelers down Dementia Road, to be helpful and informative. I will also mention the direction that I will be taking the podcast into as we move into a new year (2023).
Topics covered in this episode :
- Share things that I learned from hearing how a son has navigated and dealt with his mothers progression.
- Share with you the Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast Manifesto - or why I am doing this podcast
- Talk about the different roles we play as we journey together with our Loved One and present a model of how to compare and contrast how these roles differ and can change over time.
- Touch upon how what I have learned while training for my Faith Based Life Coach Certification has helped me to have a healthier emotional outlook on life.
LINKS
Link to post a comment on this episode
Link to where you can tell us what topic you would like to hear about in future episodes
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page.
The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast is now also in YouTube.
To watch Episodes with video click on this link or search for "The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast" in the YouTube search bar.
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Consider Donating to support the Podcast to help pay for the cost of creating, hosting and streaming the podcast
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EP 18 a 2nd Home and a 2nd Family
When I decided to move my wife to a memory care facility, I never would have imagined that the memory care facility could truly become a second home for both of us. What was even more of a surprise was that we would also gain a second family.
I discuss how that evolved over this last year and a half. I'll try my best to tell my wifes side of the story. As you may know, she doesn't speak very much and hasn't for the last couple of years, but I've been very observant of her reactions and how she's been able to adapt and adjust. I'll also tell my side and how the current memory care facility she is at has now become my second home, and that I now have a new set of neighbors that have become friends and some are starting to feel like family.
Topics covered in this episode :
- How the gift of time has allowed for a new perspective as we have adjusted to living apart.
- Tips on how to get accurate information on how your loved one is really doing.
- How the assisted living residents can add to your ability to socialize and gain new friends foy both you and your loved one
- How I was able to realize the both of our needs for human connection could be met after enduring the isolation caused by the covid pandemic
LINKS
Link to post a comment on this episode
Link to where you can tell us what topic you would like to hear about in future episodes
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page.
The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast is now also in YouTube.
To watch Episodes with video click on this link or search for "The Surviving Alzheimer's Podcast" in the YouTube search bar.
--------------------------------------------
Consider Donating to support the Podcast to help pay for the cost of creating, hosting and streaming the podcast
DONATE via STRIPE
EP 17 Giving Thanks
Following up from the previous episode, I will let you know how my Thanksgiving Week unfolded and if my plan to reduce my typical holiday depression succeeded. As in life, there's always ups and downs and that's how the week went and what I was able to learn.
I also learned a few good lessons along the way. One was taught to me by the husband of another Resident at the memory care facility where Shanna lives. I also learned a few other lessons about expectations around the holidays and how they can create anxiety and stress.
Finally, I talk about New Traditions that I've started with Shanna, that try to capture some of the joy of previous traditions but now they are adjusted to our current situation. I will also discuss how the power of GRATITUDE has really changed my perspective as I've traveled down Dementia Road with my wife.
Topics covered in this episode :
- My anti depression holiday plan
- Putting the plan into practice and discussing the results
- A valuable lesson about not limiting what my loved one can do with me
- Learning how to dramatically reduce depression and how to deal with what remains
- Discussing how Gratitude has the power to change our perspective and outlook on our situation.
----------------LINKS ------------------------
Link to post a comment on this episode
Link to where you can tell us what topic you would like to hear about in future episodes
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page.
EP 16 Tips for the Holidays
This episode focuses on how I've made adjustments in how we celebrated Thanksgiving and Chrismast over the years through the various stages of Alzheimer's disease. I will Share some lessons learned as well as tips that may be helpful to you as you experience the holidays with your loved one.
I will tell you of a recent experience, where I realized I was creating anxiety for myself. By using some of the techniques I learned in my faith based coaching certification, I was able to “coach” myself and realize what was really causing my stress and depression.
Topics covered in this episode :
- Tip from our Mild, Moderate and Severe stages experiences
- Options for celebrating with or large family
- Understanding how our Loved One thinks about the holidays
- Reducing stress and depression
- How I coached myself through this years dilemma
LINKS
Link to post a comment on this episode
Link to tell us what topic you would like to hear about in future episodes
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page.
EP 15 She is Still There …
This episode focuses on how I've been able to stay connected to my wife as she has progressed through the various stages of Alzheimer's disease. I will discuss how even though she has lost her ability to verbally communicate, how I was able to make certain adjustments that enabled me to continue to communicate with her and THAT SHE IS STILL THERE !
I will tell you of a recent experience, where a couple of Shanna’s longtime friends, who hadn't seen her for a couple of years, were able to visit and connect with her as well.
I will also talk about how I have come to realize that this ability to communicate is a gift from God and how it came to be.
Topics covered in this episode :
- Lesson Learned : She is still there - it's up to me to find her
- The value of friends who visit our loved one
- Joy in reconnecting with friends
- Adjusting to the decline of our loved ones verbal abilities over the years
- What I do to help stay connected to my wife
-------------- LINKS --------------------------------------
Link to post a comment on this episode
Link to Nobody Knows Your Story Podcast where Ken tells his life story
Link to to tell us what topic you would like to hear about in future episodes
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page.
EP 13 My Greatest Gifts
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Now that we're caught up with our backstory. The next set of episodes, I will share some of the valuable lessons that I've learned so far. I'll also discuss the journey off how those lessons were learned. In life, I've learned to enjoy the journey as much, if not more than arriving at the destination. Today, I'll talk to you about a couple of the greatest gifts that I ever received so far.
It is my hope that as I share these experiences with you, it may awaken a realization of some of the blessings you and your loved one have experienced, as well as maybe instill a sense of hope for gifts and blessings that might lie ahead for you.
Topics covered in this episode :
- Losing my wife and best friend - so I thought….
- The joy of regaining my wife - the greatest gift of all
- The Pros and Cons of Online support Groups
- The gift of in person support groups
- “Men Who Care” - a support group of hero’s that I am honored to be a part of
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page. https://www.facebook.com/SurvivingAlzPodcast
EP 13 Survival and Feeling Joy Again !
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In this episode I complete our backstory and talk about the last 8 months leading us up to our current situation. It covers the time that Shanna moved into her current Memory Care facility along with how the transition went. We will cover the gradual changes that have occurred in both of our experiences in a Memory Care facility as well as her continual decline as the disease continues to take its toll.
I'll also talk about some key lessons that I've learned and how things like gratitude and perspective have allowed us both to feel Joy once again. This eventually helped us to Survive our most difficult times to date.
Topics covered in this episode :
- Moving again - Doing it better this time
- What makes a Memory Care facility excellent
- Learning to trust the staff
- Dealing with the resurfacing of sadness and guilt
- How Joy can be restored
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page. https://www.facebook.com/SurvivingAlzPodcast
EP 12 - Signs of Survival - 1st year in Memory Care - Advanced Stage (part 2)Link to post a comment on this episode
This episode is an overview of the 11 months that Shanna spent at the first Memory Care facility. This was a period of many ups and downs, accompanied with many valuable lessons learned along the way for both of us.
I'll describe how things changed for both of us and how we made many adjustments as we began a new chapter of our journey down dementia road together.
I will discuss the events leading up to and why I eventually decided to move Shanna to another facility.
Topics covered in this episode :
- The realities of a Memory Care Facility
- Our early experiences with the staff
- The struggles of adjusting we both experienced and lessons learned
- Dealing with staff turnover and management changes
- Advocating for your Loved Ones quality of care and wellbeing
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page. https://www.facebook.com/SurvivingAlzPodcast
EP 11 - The Hardest Thing I Have Ever Done…
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In this episode I will tell the story of the hardest thing I've ever done. That is moving my best friend and wife to a Memory Care Facility. I discuss the anxious week before this happened, the actual moving day and how we were able to move her without any problems. I also talked about the weeks that followed and how I dealt with all the emotions that came up as we began this new chapter of our life together, living apart for the first time in over 40 years.
I discuss some of the things that I was inspired to do during this very emotional time that I believe were instrumental in allowing us to survive this experience and eventually learn to thrive in this new chapter of our lives. I will discuss how important it was to have family support and faith in my conviction that this was the right thing for us to do at this time.
Topics covered in this episode :
Final preparations on the actual move
- Our last family gathering at our home
- What led to a move and transition that was smoother than I expected
- How unprepared I was for the emotional upheaval that I would experience
- How time and the healing of my heart has tempered my perspective on this experience
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page. https://www.facebook.com/SurvivingAlzPodcast
EP 10 - Deciding to Move her to a Memory Care facility
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page. https://www.facebook.com/SurvivingAlzPodcast
Link to post a comment on this episode
Today I will discuss what it was like and what led me to decide that I could no longer take care of my wife Shanna at home and that I should move her to a Memory Care facility.
I leaned on TEAM SHANNA (family, friends, and doctors) at this emotional time. I saw many tender mercies from God along the way as well.
Now this is a significant decision and an important crossroad on Dementia Road that most, if not all, caregivers will face. It's my hope that you may learn something of value from our experience that may help you when you reach this crossroad in your journey.
Topics covered in this episode :
- What caregiving was like for the last 6-8 months at home
- How I made the key decisions of
- Should I move her?
- If so, then where should I move her to?
- When should I move hert?
- Finally How should I do the actual Move ?
- What preparations I need to make for the transition
- Dealing with the many emotions that come up during this part of the journey
EP 9 - Advanced Stage Alzheimer’s (part 1) - Still at Home
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page. https://www.facebook.com/SurvivingAlzPodcast
Link to post a comment on this episode
In this episode I'll review when Shannan transitioned from Moderate stage Alzheimer's to Advanced or severe stage Alzheimer's. I will cover this last stage in multiple parts. This will be part one. We'll focus on the time period of her last year at home with me as I was still taking care of her 24/ 7.
I'll briefly review what are some of the common symptoms of this last stage of Alzheimer's and what we've experienced so far. I'll also share a few of my more challenging Caregiving experiences. Finally I'll talk about what I learned and what helped me to get through this very difficult period of caregiving.
Topics covered in this episode :
- How did the transition happen?
- Common symptoms of Advanced Stage Alzheimers
- What I did to become a more effective caregiver
- An example of dealing with altered reality
- What were some of the key learnings from this time period
EP 8 - Are you ready to Quarterback your team ?
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page.https://www.facebook.com/SurvivingAlzPodcast
Link to post a comment on this episode
As this year's football season has begun I would like to use the role of a football quarterback as an analogy of how we as a primary caregiver are at the center of all aspects of our loved ones lives . If you are not the primary decision maker and play more of a supportive role then consider yourself to be an off lineman protecting your quarterback.
Listener Comment shoutout to Christine.
Topics covered in this episode :
I will give an overview of the many aspects of the role of Quarterbacking your caregiving team.
I will tell of my experience assembling "Team Shanna" the team consists of
- medical professionals
- financial and legal advisors
- along with emotional and spiritual coaches.
- Also included on the team are dear friends who have supported us along our journey
- last but surely not least: both the in home and Memory Care caregivers and staff
It has taken years to assemble the team but sometimes you have to scramble as things can quickly change as I will illustrate in a story about a dear friend and his wife.
Summary:
- Having you team in place with you as the Quarterback will give you peace of mind knowing you are ready to deal with the changes and challenges of caring for your loved one
- “Never let Fear of the Future rob you of the Joy that you can experience Today”
Link to “The Surviving Alzheimer’s Podcast” Facebook page.
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In today's episode we'll be continuing our backstory and talking about moderate stage Alzheimer's when we were both living at home and I became Shanna’s full-time caregiver. This lasted somewhere between three and four years.
It was a time that was filled with many changes and adjustments. This was the time where my caregiver education and experience became full-time and I learned many lessons along the way. A few years into this time period I started my “Our Alzheimer’s Journey” journal. This is the opening line of the journal:
“ This journal should have been started a few years ago, but I decided to start it now because I want to capture the feelings, experiences, and memories from here on out in great detail. “
Topics covered in this episode :
- Sharing of a listener’s review - Thanks Susan !
- Overview of that time period including Covid 19 pandemic
- Detailed discussion of typical signs of Moderate Stage Alzheimer’s and what we experienced
- How I dealt with the growing caregiver stress with some recommendations
- Share learnings from that time as well as new learnings as I reflect back
- How working with a Faith Based Life Coach helped me to Survive Alzheimer's and led me to become a certified coach.
- The most important lesson I learned about my thoughts that has changed my life for the better
In today's episode I will talk about some difficult topics. That of grief, guilt and ambiguous loss. Now it's not my goal to depress you any further, as I'm sure you've experienced each of these emotions and feelings while you've been on your caregiving journey.
It is my intention that as I reflect upon my experiences and share them with a little bit of perspective we can see how as caregivers we can experience these often difficult emotions but not allow them to hold us hostage.
At this point in my journey I've learned that grief can actually be a healthy emotion, as it can help you process your losses. On the other hand, I have found that I have absolutely no use for guilt most of the time.
Most likely I could spend a complete episode on each one of these emotions. For now in today's episode I will just touch upon each one of them and how we might be able to deal with them in a healthy way.
I will touch upon how grief has taught me and continues to teach meto appreciate what we've had and to treasure what remains.
I will also share how I battled and conquered Guilt especially when I chose to move my wife to a memory care facility.
Finally, I will discuss one of the most unique dementia caregiving experiences, the one of ambiguous loss.
In this episode, I discuss the year leading up to my wife's eventual diagnosis of Alzheimer's. I'll share what we learned and how we arrived at that diagnosis in working with the doctors. I will also share how after receiving the diagnosis, how we as a couple and as a family dealt with that diagnosis.
Continuing with our backstory… About the year 2016 was when we entered into moderate Alzheimer's stage and still didn't know it, because we had not yet arrived at a diagnosis.
After firing our first neurologist, we started working with a new one. He began an extensive set of tests. I will discuss what that was like for Shanna. In the middle of all this we had some life-changing events that added significant stress to the both of us.
After all of the testing was done we finally received our diagnosis. I will tell how it felt and what it was like to receive that diagnosis and then have to share it with our family and friends.
I'll also point out what I feel are some key things that we decided back then that have really helped us in the years following the diagnosis.
Finally, I'll share a couple of significant lessons learned during that part of our journey that may be helpful to you.
We're going to return to our backstory...
Episode two talked about the time before dementia really had an effect on our family and our relationship.
Today, we'll take a closer look when my wife Shanna was in the early stage of Alzheimer's and that time leading up until her eventual diagnosis a few years later.
I will share how we dealt with some of the typical and not so typical experiences when Alzheimer's starts to take effect and creates the first of many “new normal” stages of life for you and what you'll experience, how you adjust to those stages and eventually move beyond them to the next stage.
If this is where you are in your journey. I hope there will be some things that will help you to adjust to how things are in your new world. If you have moved beyond this early stage. Hearing of our experience may stir up some difficult memories for you. Regardless of where you are. I hope that you can gain a clearer perspective from our experience as you relate them to your own.
So. Mild stage Alzheimer's. What is so mild about it?
For me, this was a very hard period of caregiving. I think mostly because at this point we did notknow what we were dealing with. It was one of the most jarring periods, everything was so new and I had absolutely zero experience in dealing with this. …..
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In today's episode, we'll explore one of the early and often ongoing challenges that we experience as a caregiver, dealing with denial.
I'll also share with you our experience on how we dealt with getting Shanna to stop driving once it was no longer safe for her to drive.
Finally. I'll share with you a few resources that I found early on that helped to educate me on Alzheimer's and dementia, as well as taught me how to become an effective caregiver.
Some of the topics that are covered are
· You don’t know, What You don’t know…
· The what and why of Denial and how to deal with it
· Our experience with getting my loved one to stop driving when it was no long safe
· Resources that were helpful early on
o www.alz.org – The Alzheimer’s Association
o www.TeepaSnow.com - Teepa Snow – A positive approach to care
o www.CareBlazers.com - Dr. Natale Edmunds careblazer program and facebook group
This episode takes us back in time, back to a time when Alzheimer's disease was not part of our life.
I will answer the following questions in this episode.
· Looking back, was there any hint of what might be lurking in our future?
· What were the early signs, if any, that something was not quite right with my wife's cognitive abilities?
· If I could travel back in time, what would I tell myself as I started my caregiver journey?
Some of the topics that are covered are
· Our backstory – life before Alzheimer’s
· Working with doctors in the early days of the journey
· How I dealt with repeated questions
· What helped me to adopt a healthier perspective
In this first episode I will give you some of background information and introduce you to the people that this podcast is about. I'll also introduce you to how we have survived Alzheimer's disease so far.
It's my hope that you'll be able to connect with us, thus, be able to relate your experiences to ours in doing this. I hope that you can learn from our experiences.