Bad Marriages in the Bible: Recent Episodes
Sean Norris and Kate Norris
The Bad Marriages in the Bible podcast unpacks the typically messy relationships in the Bible to show the power of forgiveness, reconciliation, and redemption...and tackles questions from listeners. Featuring the Revs Sean and Kate Norris, founders of Dandelion Ministries on Long Island, NY.
In ancient Corinth the church had become a hook-up culture. Sean and Kate discuss how Paul stops the church from being a dating app.
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Ariticle and Book Recommendations on women in leadership in the church:
Finally Feminist: A Pragmatic Christian Understanding of Gender by John Stackhouse https://www.amazon.com/Finally-Feminist-Pragmatic-Christian-Understanding/dp/0801031303 Icons of Christ: A Biblical and Systematic Theology for Women's Ordination by Bill Witt, https://a.co/d/047uMNGT Husband, Wife, Father, Child, Master, Slave: Peter Through Roman Eyes by Kurt C Schaefer, https://a.co/d/06KpwNzB Man and Woman One in Christ by Philip Barton Payne https://www.amazon.com/Man-Woman-One-Christ-Theological/dp/0310219884
NT scholar Ken Bailey's articles: https://www.kennethbailey.net/articles
Sean and Kate discuss Paul's treatment of sex in marriage and reveal how counter-cultural it was 2000 years ago and continues to be in face of our self first culture.
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Don Chaffer sings, "All these promises of freedom in the bondages of sin...I'm praying someone somewhere softly will bring the sadness back in." Paul does this work with the Corinthian church, who were very confused about what Christian freedom really is.
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This is God's scared straight episode for the early church. Is there any good news in the judgment of Ananias and Sapphira's sin?
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Have you ever wondered how God responds to you in your absolute worst moment? John shows us.
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Kate and Sean unpack Jesus' parable of the 10 Virgins in Matthew 25 where he shakes his audience out of their "no's" and "maybe's" and into faith in him.
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In his parable of the wedding feast Jesus aggressively goes after our stubborn hearts that think we don't need grace. It's bad news for our self-justifying efforts, but great news for us in our exhaustion of always trying to be better.
Sean and Kate discuss how Jesus quenches the thrist of the woman at the well in her broken relationships.
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John the Baptist represents the whole OT (the law and the prophets) that identified sin, but could not take it away. When John hears Jesus forgiving sins, he rejoices and says this is the Bridegrrom you've been waiting for.
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Sean and Kate discuss how Jesus' first miracle affirms marriage and points to his amazing love for us.
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Jesus continues to amplify the demand of perfect love by exposing our innate desire for revenge and retaliation when we've been wronged, and he has the audacity to say we have to love our enemies...the people that persecute us, oppress us, abuse us. He reveals the law demands the impossible from us, but it is exactly what he would do for us.
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In Beauty and the Beast, Cogsworth pefectly describes our problem with oaths especically when it comes to love, "There's the usual things, flowers, chocolates, promises you don't intend to keep..." Sean and Kate continue their dive into Jesus' Sermon on the Mount where he turns his attention to all of our broken promises. Thankfully, he is the One who has kept every promise for you.
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Jesus continues his heart surgery sermon in order to stop every mouth from justifying themselves. Sean and Kate show how he does this because he loves us and is pushing us to his free grace and forgiveness.
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According to Jesus, every marriage and romantic relationship ever has been made up of adulterers. He continues his deep work of heart surgery in his Sermon on the Mount pushing us to his forgiveness by addressing lust next.
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Have you ever thought to yourself that your spouse or loved one is a fool, or stupid, or an idiot? If you have then this episode is for you.
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Sean and Kate introduce Jesus' famous Sermon On the Mount in Matthew 5 and help correct very common misinterpretations. When Jesus preaches he is your heart surgeon...applying God's Word directly where it matters most.
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Sean and Kate discuss God breaking into our world and how pastoral God is to Jesus' family. It's an encouragement to us all with the difficulties and obstacles we face in our own lives.
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Sean and Kate continue their discussion of Jesus' family tree in Matthew 1. It is a greatest hits list of some of the biggest bad marriages that they have covered througout the Old Testament, and it drives home Jesus' mission to forgive, save, and redeem.
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What does the season of Advent have to do with Jesus' family tree? Sean and Kate dicsuss how Jesus' genealogies in Matthew and Luke reveal God's faithfulness to all the people who are banking on him by faith.
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Malachi doesn't pull any punches on the enduring problem of sin for God's people because the Lord is coming. The Old Testament ends with the fulfillment of all of God's promises in view…the Son of righteousness will rise with healing in His wings.
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The Old Testament ends with a devastating word of conviction against which none of us can stand, and yet Malachi makes sure to remind us of God's enduring love for his people. Sean and Kate describe the unmerciful act of lessening the law and giving empty affirmation instead of true grace for sinners in Jesus Christ.
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Sean and Kate conclude their discussion of Joel highlighting how the end of the world is good news and that God's justice is different from ours...thank God!
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Sean and Kate discuss the promises in Joel of a Bridegroom who is stronger than our brokenness and restores all that the locusts have eaten.
Sean and Kate discuss how the prophet Joel bursts Judah’s bubble regarding the Day of the Lord. God would deal with his people first through the ravaging locusts before dealing their enemies. Once again revealing God’s pattern of death and resurrection in our lives.
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Sean and Kate discuss God’s passionate steadfsast love for us, his work to turn us back to him, and raise us from the dead. Hosea points ahead to how Jesus takes the sting of death away from our relationship with God.
Sean and Kate dive deeper into Hosea 10 showing how repentance happens to us. It is the work of God and not something we do. He detoxes us from our sin so that we might recognize our need for his saving grace.
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Sean and Kate discuss Hosea continuing to diagnose how our hearts are unable to turn upward, so God comes down to us. He is against our sin but for us in Jesus.
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Sean and Kate walk through the hard passages of judgment yet they uncover how God loves us passionately, like a husband loves his wayward bride, and mourns our sin like betrayal in marriage. He uncovers the fact that we cannot turn to him; he must intervene and save. That’s just where Hosea is going…
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Kate and Sean dicsuss the fallout of when we worship at the altar of sexuality and how the book of Hosea leads to John 4 where Jesus meets the woman at the well.
Sean and Kate discuss Hosea 3 and the love that redeems our wayward hearts.
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Kate and Sean discuss how God addresses us in our place of dillusion, where the gods of this age are wrecking havoc in our lives. He kills the delusion and rescues us in Jesus bringing us home to ourselves and him.
We finally make it to Hosea...one of the main books that inspired this podcast. Sean and Kate intro Hosea and discuss the bondage of humanity and how God addresses us there.
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Sean and Kate discuss the wisdom of Daniel and Jesus as we face a world in upheaval.
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Our 100th episode!!! Kate and Sean review God’s two words of law and gospel and how the prophet Ezekiel uses them to give an everlasting hope to Judah when they were at their worst.
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In the midst of facing the often devastating consequences of our actions, Jeremiah’s lament leads us to true mercy, hope, and love.
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God invades the soap opera of our wayward hearts. He uses Jeremiah to bring a death to the old and new life where you never expect it.
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Sean and Kate jump into Jeremiah and discuss how God aggressively comes after us in our faithlessness.
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Happy Easter! Kate and Sean discuss jealousy vs. envy and a love that makes you sing in Isaiah 54.
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Isaiah 5 opens with a song for God’s vineyard that at first glance sounds like the original break-up song (eat your heart out, Taylor), but Sean and Kate discuss how it actually points ahead to very needed good news.
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The rich getting richer at the expense of the poor, flaunting it for everyone to see, and the misuse and abuse of power...the problems described in Isaiah 3 and 4 sound eerily similar to our society today. Is there a God strong enough to save them and us?
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Sean and Kate introduce the book of Isaiah, which zeroes in on the tribe of Judah and their rocky relationship with God exposing our unfaithfulness to him and his never ending love for us.
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Is there any meaning to life??? Ecclesiastes asks the question and reveals the answer is “no” if this world is all that there is, but “yes” if there is a God who created it and us. Kate and Sean unpack the good news for married and single people in Ecclesiastes 4.
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Sean and Kate dive into Proverbs 31 and show the word of rebuke for men and women alike and the powerful grace of Jesus loving us like an excellent mother and wife.
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Sean and Kate dig into the confusing statements about relationships in Proverbs 30 and reveal the convicting word, which begs the question, "Who can bear our broken love?"
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Kate and Sean march through the marriage proverbs of Proverbs and get very proverbial.
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Sean and Kate discuss how the Lord exposes the empty promises of temptation and redeems them with his true promises that satisfy your soul.
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With the help of The Lumineers and Love Actually, Sean and Kate discuss Proverbs 5. A father giving his son clear warning against the temptation toward adultery and directing him back to the wife of his youth. How does this mirror of Proverbs 5 push us to grace?
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Sean and Kate explore the use of the Woman of Wisdom and the Woman of Folly - God exposes our folly and desperate need for wisdom and then promises to give that wisdom to us as a gift.
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Proverbs is not just great advice, it has one destination...to take those who fail to follow it's wisdom to Jesus.
The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt
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Merry Christmas from Bad Marriages in the Bible!!! Kate and Sean take a look at Luke's accounts of the angel Gabriel visitng Zechariah and Mary, the great news he brings, and why he handles them very differently.
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Sean and Kate move into the Psalms. Psalm 45 paints the picture of amazingly good news that we are the Bride of the Lord's in the ultimate royal wedding. They discuss how it is the promised fulfillment of all of our deepest desires for safety and love.
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We experience the brokenness of this world in a couple of different ways...some of it is a result of our actions (what we have done and what we have not done) and some of it is just the result of living in a fallen world (natural disasters, disease, death). Sean and Kate share some of their own experience of loss and suffering and how the Lord carried them through.
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The Center
Pure Desire
Real reassurance in the face of grief, bad advice, and an angry spouse.
A Grace Disguised by Jerry Sittser
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God holding onto you when you can't hold onto anything.
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The tables turn on Haman, and his plans for Jewish genocide and murder end with him hung on his own gallows. Sean and Kate unpack how God intervened through the brave and shrewd Esther to save his people and exact revenge on their enemies.
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Arrogance, a centuries long feud, and the threat of genocide set the stage for the dramatic turn in Esther. Sean and Kate discuss Esther's bravery in the face of almost certain death, the divine hand leading her, and how she foreshadows the amazing grace of Jesus for his people.
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Did you know the show the Bachelor began 2500 years ago? The first episode took place in ancient Persia and is recorded for us in the book of Esther. Sean and Kate discuss how God graciously works his plan of redemption through the brokenness of this world...like beauty contests.
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Control and objectification never make for a healthy marriage. Sean and Kate jump into the book of Esther and discuss the the bravery of a wife standing up to an abusive husband and the good news of God who sees and cares for the oppressed.
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Nehemiah 8 gives us the better word than Ezra - the good news that it doesn’t all rest on your shoulders…that you are forgiven, and that enables forgiveness in your relationships, especially marriage.
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The book of Ezra exposes the bad marriages of the leaders of Israel and their collateral damage and leaves us looking for a better word.
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What do Toronto, Sunnybrook Stables, Pittsburgh, and Your Mom’s House have to do with building intimacy. Song of Songs 8 describes intimacy by being known, forgiven, and loved. We give examples from our recent trip of walking down Kate’s memory lane in Toronto.
What do Queen Jezebel, Led Zeppelin, and Lynyrd Skynyrd have to say about the idols in our lives? What does Jesus do about them? - 2 Kings 9
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Sean and Kate look at 2 Kings 4 where Elisha helps the recent widow with her big financial problems and how this points ahead to God's provision for us in Jesus.
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Sean and Kate discuss the unholy power couple Ahab and Jezebel in 1 Kings 17-21 and their run in with Elijah. We see God turning his people’s hearts back from the idols that were killing them.
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As the book ends praising the bride for her virginity, Sean and Kate pull out the forgiving and redeeming love of Jesus, which makes marriage into a safe place for honesty, healing, passion for two broken people. - Song of Solomon 8:8-14
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What do modern art and alternative rock have to do with the Song of Solomon? Listen to Sean and Kate to find out. They discuss the beauty of vulnerability and dependence and how it leads to greater intimacy and passion.
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Love through the joy and pain of sharing a lifetime together, which are like the choice fruits, new as well as old. Song of Solomon 7:11-8:4
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After reassurance and reconcliation, the bride and the bridegroom have great make up sex. Sean and Kate unpack the gospel in the passage and what redeemed deisre looks like.
Friendship is the bedrock of initimacy - problems in the bedroom get sorted out in the living room. God’s grace never runs out and never runs away.
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Conflicts are inevitable even with couples that really love each other and are full of passion for one another as this book shows. In Jesus this conflict will lead to forgiveness and a stronger bond between them.
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Sean and Kate celebrate the climax of the book as the Bride and Groom consumate their marriage in an outpouring of mutal love, poetry, and affirmation. They pull out the gospel promise of restoration for all people everywhere using: John 4, Ezekiel 36:35-36, Isaiah 51:3, and 58:11.
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In Song of Solomon 4 we have an up close view of the wedding day. Admiration leads to vulnerabilty...we are all desperate to be truly seen and wanted and to feel safe. Sex belongs in this context.
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You are extravagantly loved and highly protected. Listen to Sean and Kate unpack Song of Solomon 3:6-11 to find out how this wedding celebration applies to you.
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Masters of the Air, The Avett Borthers, Nazareth, and attachment theory help Kate and Sean unpack the good kind of pain in the love between the bride and groom.
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Young stags, the Lego Movie, Lionel Ritchie, deaf and blind lost cats all help us to see the safety and security of belonging to the Lord and one another in marriage…and the good times it brings all night long.
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Sean and Kate employ the help of U2, Patrick Dempsey, and The Lumineers to bring to life the poetic imagery between the two lovers.
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With the help of Bad Company and the woman in Luke 7 Sean and Kate unpack the good news of this erotic love poem.
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Kate and Sean discuss who wrote the Song of Solomon and how to read it. Good news is this book is not just for married people:)
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Is sex easy or difficult to talk about for you? This little book gives us a picture of redeemed desire and opens up the discussion. In the words of Salt-N-Pepa, "Let's talk about sex, baby!"
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Sean and Kate discuss how King Solomon's record of 700 wives and 300 concubines ( 1 Kings 11) and the current trend in our culutre toward what is being called "consensual nonmonogamy" both testify to our desperate need for a Savior.
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Sean and Kate discuss the terrible dysfunction among David's kids and how dark we can actually go as people. BUT God's grace is always stronger and goes to the absolute depths of our brokenness, to the point of death to bring new life and set us free.
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When we hear the New Testament refer to Bathesheba as "the wife of Uriah" is that just God rubbing David's face in his sin? Are we going to have to relive our worst moments over and over again for the rest of our lives? Sean and Kate discuss how God's redemption and healing work in our neediest places and the nature of a testimony.
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No one likes to be confronted with our sin, but God brings it into the light to actually deal with it...to bring new life. We see him preach his two words of law and gospel to David through the prophet Nathan and bring redemption out of the destruction of David's sin.
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It's the one you've all been waiting for...the infamous David and Bathsheba bad marriage. We see the hero King David is just as much a sinner as the rest of us. How does God redeem this?
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David wants revenge against Abigail's idiot husband, but God sends Abigail to save David from himself and save the lives of many.
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Merry Christmas everyone! Sean and Kate take a little moment to discuss the challenges facing Jesus' parents and the miraculous work for which God chose them. Needless to say their relationship was certainly tested. We're praying you all have a blessed Christmas celebrating the coming of Immanuel - God with us!
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Is there any hope for us when we're stuck? Sean and Kate continue to look at David's first wife, Michal, who was stuck in her resentments and bitterness as a result of the hurts and traumas she had suffered. Her story surprisingly gives us hope because she is just the kind of person Jesus came for.
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We feel our brokenness the most in the context of our relationships - the great need that each of us has for love. The Bible continually highlights this void and asks, "Who can fill it?" Sean and Kate discuss David's first marriage points us to the answer.
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Every year the list of religious leaders exposed for abuse grows...using their position of authority and implied trust and respect to take advantage of or manipulate others. Sadly, this is nothing new. Sean and Kate look at how Samuel's first job from God was to expose this kind of abuse by the priest and his family. The Lord insured this story was recorded so that we might see that he sees us and hears us and does not abide abuse in his name. He has come to heal and restore.
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How does God meet us in our place of desperation? Does he know our pain? Does he hear our cry? Kate and Sean discuss how Hannah's story brings great comfort to us when we're desperate and it seems like no one hears.
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Provocative feet, an amazing mother-in-law, and big redemption await you in this dramatic conclusion of Ruth. Sean and Kate also discuss some tips on engaging with your family of origin this Thanksgiving holiday. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
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Having difficult relationships with your in-laws is so common it's a cliche repeatedly played out in our movies and television shows, but the book of Ruth gives us a dramatically different picture of love between a daughter-in-law and her mother-in-law. Kate and Sean discuss how Ruth's love for Naomi displays Jesus' faithfulness to us. And they also enjoy some gleaning jokes...which we all love.
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Kate and Sean look at Samson's seriously self-destructive condependent relationship with Delilah and how God brings deliverance and redemption out of it.
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Sean and Kate take a look at the culture of oppression, idolatry, and complacency and how God broke in to save his people using Samson's first bad marriage.
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You may have heard the stories about the strong man in the Bible who never cut his hair, but I bet you've never heard the story about his parents. Sean and Kate discuss Samson's parents and how their story is encouraging to any of us that are in the midst of a struggle.
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Have you ever made a vow in a place of fear and desperation that you deeply regret? Jephthah's vow is as bad as it gets. What hope is there for those of us who have made horrible vows in our lives?
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Sean and Kate take a look at the man made famous by the Bible in your hotel room nightstand, Gideon, and his prodigious offspring. They focus in on the question of what is true deliverance?
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Sean and Kate bounce off a good marriage in Judges to discuss how to understand the Bible, tribal warfare, and whether or not women should speak in church.
Some articles we reference in this episode for your further edification: Seabiscuit, Zoolander, and Sonship; First Born 1, 2, and 3; and Ephesus Now.
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Sean and Kate intro the book of Judges looking at the Israelites' patterns of unfiahtfulness, our unhealthy coping methods, and how God intervenes to meet our needs.
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Kate and Sean look at Jesus’ Great (many times over) Grandma, who was the savior of Jewish spies in Jericho…and also happened to be a prostitute. Grandma's got some crazy stories!
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Kate and Sean explain how trying to be the perfect wife and perfect husband in your marriage is a recipe for disaster. They look at the ideal wife in Proverbs 31, Woman Wisdom in Proverbs 1-9, and how they bring you the grace of Jesus.
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Reclaiming a word of encouragement that is often ripped out of context for Christian men. We take a closer look at the command that kills and the promise that gives life for all people. Special shout-outs to the Anglican Diocese of New England and Audrey Patra of Love Unveiled Ministries (Uganda). And learn more about the first Ugandan Martyrs (including the lesser known story of the lone woman martyr).
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Sean takes a little moment to share some of what he will be preaching in Uganda and Kenya this week and looks at how family systems help us understand more of one of Jesus' most famous parables.
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Sean and Kate discuss how Jesus answers questions about the laws against divorce...and more importantly how he engages and loves divorcees.
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Kate and Sean unpack the Christian paradox of being both fully righteous and fully a sinner at the same time. And they explain the good news of how Jesus speaks to us and creates new life.
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Sean and Kate continue to show how the law of sex brings you to the grace of Jesus Christ. Kate references an awkward dinner party found in Luke 7 and the hope of true intimacy for broken lovers.
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You knew we had to get there eventually with a podcast about marriage, and here we are. For the next few episodes we will be focusing on what the Bible has to say about sex. As is always the case we begin with the first word of the law and go from there.
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Sean and Kate look at the surprising paragraph mentioning Moses' marriage in the book of Exodus and see how his wife, Zipporah, was counting on God's promise.
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Sorry this is a day late everyone! Summer is setting in:)
Sean and Kate discuss how the heart of the Bible, marriage, and relationships in general point us to God's love and desire for us. He is our one and only.
FYI, we will be taking the next two weeks off for some summer vacation. We'll see you back here mid-July!
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Mercy is stronger than resentment. God intervenes again to reconcile Joseph and his brothers. Dandelion Ministries
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How is God with us in the midst of suffering? And how does he use it for good in our lives? Kate and Sean discuss Joseph's time in jail to find some answers.
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Good news when you are in the pit metaphorically and literally.
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Just when you thought things couldn't get worse in this family...they do...way worse! And still God's goodness shines through. Listen to what happens between Judah and his daughter-in-law, Tamar.
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Jacob's kids are a mess. Jealousy, favorites, resentments, lies, murderous plans...all point to Jesus?
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Kate and Sean discuss what happens when Jacob and Esau finally see each other again after 20 years. Does Esau still want to kill his brother? Is Jacob the still the same old trickster little sibling?
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Sean and Kate discuss Jacob wrestling with God and what it means to be a fighting Christian.
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Aphrodisiacs, jealousy, rivalry, and the grace of God.
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Sean and Kate look at Jacob's family in this episode. It hammers home that God loves and has grace for undeserving people and redeems our broken love. And they finally tackle the question of polygamy in the Old Testament.
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Sean and Kate dive into Isaac's family and discuss the pitfalls of parents playing favorites and triangulation. God's grace is always undeserved and as we have seen every time so far it is stronger than sin.
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The good news of God choosing you.
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This week Sean and Kate move on to the next generation with Isaac and Rebekah and see the reality of repeating family patterns and how to navigate them in a relationship.
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Kate and Sean continue to look at how the New Testament, in this case Peter, uses Abraham and Sarah to show how the gospel undoes Aristotle and has vast implications for the household.
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Sean and Kate continue their discussion of what the New Testament has to say about Abraham and Sarah. Romans 4 highlights the amazing liberating news of the gift of faith from God.
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Sean and Kate look at what the New Testament has to say about the scandal of Abraham's dysfunctional family. Galatians 4 uses Hagar and Sarah to explain how God brings the sadness back in order to forgive and heal us.
See God's faithfulness and mercy breakthrough repeating patterns, family dysfunction, and our efforts to control things we can't.
God's promises are so impossible for us that it is sometimes downright laughable...that's just what Sarah and Abraham do when God tells them his promise again. Thankfully, it didn't depend on them, and it doesn't depend on us either.
What happens when you prostitute out your husband? The pitfalls of Sarai's and Abram's great idea and the big redemption.
Stress often brings out the worst in us, and we usually feel its impact most in our closest relationships. What are your coping mechanisms? Wait til you hear what Abram and Sarai did under stress. Listen to find out.
That didn't take long! Kate and Sean get into Genesis 3 and discuss how the very first marriage went bad.
Sean and Kate dive into Genesis 1 and 2 and discuss how it all began and God's original intention for marriage.
Sean and Kate kick off Bad Marriages in the Bible with introductions and showing how our relationships are where we experience the greatest pain and also the greatest redemption.
The Bad Marriages in the Bible podcast unpacks the typically messy relationships in the Bible to show the power of forgiveness, reconciliation, and redemption...and tackles questions from listeners. Featuring the Revs Sean and Kate Norris, founders of Dandelion Ministries on Long Island, NY.