This Isn’t Therapy: Recent Episodes
Jake Ernst & Simon Paluck
This Isn’t Therapy... It's a podcast about it! In each episode, Jake Ernst and Simon Paluck peel back the curtain and talk about the topics that come up in therapy. It’s not therapy… it’s a silly and serious conversation about your favourite therapy themes. Big feelings? Check! Impostor syndrome? Who’s she!? Anxiety? We have it. Get in touch with us! www.instagram.com/mswjake www.instagram.com/directedbysimon www.instagram.com/notatherapypodcast
This Isn't Therapy... this is the long-awaited follow-up to our episodes about boundaries. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about being a boundary bully and using “boundaries” to control other people. They talk about an advice column question submitted to The Atlantic about family boundaries and and discuss relationship boundaries via ~the Jonah Hill situation~!
Article: Dear Therapist: My Daughter’s Boundaries Are Preventing Us From Having a Relationship by Lori Gottlieb
P.S. Send us your episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
Creators & Guests
- Simon Paluck - Host
- Jake Ernst - Host
Hello, hi! Follow us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This Isn't Therapy... this is a conversation about becoming the stand-in parent for the people around you. Are you the one always making the plans? Do find yourself saying "don't forget to..." a lot? When did you sign up to coach the people around you into "becoming the better version of themselves"? Oh, mama. Let's talk. Take out your finest quill and parchment because we're chatting through mother hen syndrome and how being the thinking brain/emotional caretaker for others leads to relationship burnout. We'll also talk about the origins of these caring behaviours and discuss the difference between genuine caring and chronic caretaking. Also, we meet Gary and Bella -- did Gary ever find his sunnies?
Article: Why 'Raising' Your Partner Leads to Relationship Burnout. by Yvonne Castañeda
P.S. Send us your episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
Creators & Guests
- Simon Paluck - Host
- Jake Ernst - Host
Hello, hi! Follow us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This Isn’t Therapy… it’s a discussion about “phubbing”— the act of snubbing someone with your phone. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about phone use and how it impacts our relationships with friends, family members, and partners. They also talk about a recent study which found that higher phone use was associated with more relationship problems and an article by therapist, called “As A Therapist, I Know What’s Breaking Couples Up.” Hint hint, it’s allegedly the smartphone. 📲🤳🏼
Article discussed: As A Therapist, I Know What’s Breaking Couples Up by Andrew Sofin
Link to the study: More Scrolling, More Marital Problemsconducted by Wendy Wang and Michael Toscano of the Institute for Family Studies (IFS)
P.S. Send us your episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
Creators & Guests
- Simon Paluck - Host
- Jake Ernst - Host
Hello, hi! Follow us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This Isn't Therapy... it’s the episode about the common fear of missing out, otherwise known as FOMO. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about FOMO through the lens of the group chat: Getting kicked out of them, being left out of the formation of a new one, or not being invited into them at all. They talk about how a certain app popular with teens is making this issue even more complicated and discuss the dangers of needing to be constantly online, tapped in, and worried about missing something. Plus, stay tuned to the end of the episode to find out who spills the coffee all over the couch. 🥴
Article discussed: Navigating childhood friendship in a digital world by Cheryl Murfin
Further reading: Why Teens Say Location Sharing is the Greatest And The Worstby Julie Jargon
P.S. Send us your episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
Creators & Guests
- Simon Paluck - Host
- Jake Ernst - Host
Hello, hi! Follow us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This Isn't Therapy... it’s the episode about being broken up with by a therapist. In this episode, Jake and Simon read two stories, one submitted to the Reddit r/AskATherapist community and one submitted by a Lovely Listener! Jake and Simon break down some of the reasons why therapists may also break up with a client. It's a juicy one!
P.S. The debate about hand washing has been settled! Go check out our Instagram for the results.
P.S.S. Send us your episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
Creators & Guests
- Simon Paluck - Host
- Jake Ernst - Host
Hello, hi! Follow us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This Isn't Therapy... it’s the episode about being in denial. I’m not in denial, you are! In this episode, Jake and Simon unpack the common psychological defense mechanism. They explore why someone might be in denial and where it might stem from by talking about how this shows up in couples and by revisiting a couples case study. They follow up with Casey and Sarah, who are going through a rough patch in their relationship.
P.S. In the intro, Jake and Simon start a delicious debate about hand washing. Get in touch via socials and let us know whose side you’re on! (Simon is in maje denial on this one!…)
P.S.S. Send us your episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
Creators & Guests
- Simon Paluck - Host
- Jake Ernst - Host
Hello, hi! Follow us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This Isn't Therapy... it’s a conversation about problem spotting, hot take culture, the loss of expertise, and the pressure to have an opinion about everything. Get ready for some hot takes about hot takes! In this episode, Jake and Simon unpack an article written by Jake called You Don’t Have To Be The Fixer. Let's get into it, Mary!
A quote from the article: “You do not need to fix every problem you notice. You do not need to sign up for more problems to solve. Sometimes it is better to let problems be problems rather than answer our urge to solve them.”
Creators & Guests
- Simon Paluck - Host
- Jake Ernst - Host
Hello, hi! Follow us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This Isn't Therapy...this is a conversation about people pleasing. Through two #lovelylistener stories, Jake and Simon explore the root of people pleasing - where the behaviour stems from and how it comes to be. Get ready to laugh/cry/uncover the phenomenon known as the chameleon child. "Trying to make life fair for people around you doesn’t make up for the unfairness of your childhood." Woof.
Creators & Guests
- Simon Paluck - Host
- Jake Ernst - Host
Hello, hi! Follow us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This Isn't Therapy...this is a casual Kelly conversation about the future and ALL our collective worries. Climate change? Finances? Relationships? Oh boy. So much to hold! So much to worry about! In this episode of the pod, Jake and Simon explore the role "worrying" has in our lives through two fantastical case studies (featuring TIT celebs Tina the Troll and Grant the Gnome).
Creators & Guests
- Simon Paluck - Host
- Jake Ernst - Host
Hello, hi! Follow us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
This Isn't Therapy... it's the episode about finding hope in hopeless times. Forest fires, anti-LGBTQ bills, collective pain, and existential dread. In this episode, Jake dives deep into the purpose of therapists in hopeless times -- as the "bringers of hope". Jake and Simon talk through some stories submitted by the Lovely Listeners about how they keep hope alive and find the inner strength to keep going when things feel hopeless, meaningless, and purposeless. Whew... this one's a tear jerker!
Creators & Guests
- Simon Paluck - Host
- Jake Ernst - Host
Hello, hi! Follow us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
This Isn't Therapy... it's the episode about finding your people, finding your place, and building community. In this episode, Jake and Simon read two submissions by the Lovely Listeners about the features of their ideal community. What follows is a discussion about building community, figuring out who should be there, and what features matter most. Let's get ta buildin'!
Creators & Guests
- Simon Paluck - Host
- Jake Ernst - Host
Hello, hi! Follow us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
This Isn't Therapy... it’s the episode about coming out! In this episode, Jake and Simon come clean about coming out as they chat about some scenes and quotations from an article about the coming out experience. We are pulling back the colourful rainbow pride curtain for an essential discussion about coming out— what it’s like, why we may or may not do it, and how you can support someone who has done or is doing it! 🏳️🌈
Article: Mixed Feelings: I Recently Came Out, But I Still Feel Like I’m Hidingby Elly Belle.
Creators & Guests
- Simon Paluck - Host
- Jake Ernst - Host
Hello, hi! Follow us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
This Isn't Therapy...this is a fun, flirty convo about adapting to scenarios while keeping your values in check (DING). On this episode of the pod, Jake and Simon discuss two lovely listener stories, safe spaces, the embarrassing Ontario Catholic school board's decision to ~not~ fly a pride flag, and our new queer icon, Tina the Troll. Also, stay tuned to the end of the ep because we may or may not have a favour to ask! HAPPY PRIDE!!! <3333
Creators & Guests
- Simon Paluck - Host
- Jake Ernst - Host
Hello, hi! Follow us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
This Isn't Therapy...it's a conversation about WHY YOU'RE SO OBSESSED WITH ME. In episode 57 of the pod, Jake and Simon discuss popularity via the seminal film and cinematic masterpiece Mean Girls. What follows is a fetch conversation about status popularity vs. likability and the impact of horizontal/vertical relationships. How much do you love it? The limit does not exist!
Bonjour, Hi! Join us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy... it’s the episode about social media, dopamine, and the pleasure/pain balance. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about the principles of social media addiction and how the devices and apps we love keep us trapped in cycles of overuse. They also discuss the power of dopamine and why you need to know about this important neurotransmitter! Dopamine detox, anyone?
Book referenced: “Dopamine Nation” by Dr. Anna Lembke.
Hello, hi! Join us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy...it’s a conversation about spotting red flags in therapy. In today's world, there has been increased attention put on the potential warning signs, or red flags, in our lives and relationships. Since the therapy room often reflects the norms of a culture, it is no surprise that therapy and therapists are also getting the red flag treatment. On one hand, this can be empowering for clients to own their experience and recognize how red flags show up in the therapeutic space. On the other hand, it can also result in miscommunication of a therapist's intentions or a misidentification of a client's needs. Through the first hand accounts of two lovely listeners, Jake and Simon unpack the nuance of using the red flag system!
Hello, hi! Join us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy... it’s the long-overdue episode about anger. Jake and Simon talk about the one quality of anger that makes it so strongly felt and unpack four major types of anger— long anger, short anger, hot anger, and cold anger!
Hello, hi! Join us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy...it’s the episode about the morality of therapy-seeking. Recently some therapists have noticed that clients are showing up to therapy without a problem to solve or a goal to work on. They are showing up because “that’s what good people do.” Does going to therapy make you a “good” person? Let’s get into it.
Hello, hi! Join us on Instagram: @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
Article discussed: “Why do people think going to therapy makes you a good person?“ by Mychal Denzel Smith.
This isn't therapy... it's the grand opening of the Ha-Ha Chuckle Hut! Just kidding. It's the conversation about deflecting with humor. In this week's episode, Jake and Simon talk about the ups and downs of using humor to deflect from the things we don't want to feel.
Hi friend! Join us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy... it's the episode about Internal Family Systems Therapy! Dr. Richard Schwartz developed IFS in response to clients' descriptions of various parts within themselves. In this episode, Jake and Simon unpack the parts that make up our internal family and give you a taster for what IFS therapy is all about. Grab a notebook and a pen to unlock your best Self!
Check us out on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy-- it's your how-to guide to building better boundaries. In this episode, Jake and Simon dissect the art of boundary building. Using a fictional client named Kevin, they dive deep into what keeps us stuck in patterns of boundary-less behaviour. This episode is for you if you know what you need to say but you're just having trouble saying it.
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy, bro! It's an episode about the gnarly new film "Bros". In this episode, two bros Jake and Simon bro out to a discussion about the role of (hyper)masculinity in queer culture. For those who are unfamiliar, Bros is the first gay rom-com from a major film studio. The movie takes everything you love about Bridesmaids and Mean Girls and, with whip-smart comedy, shows us the power of queer representation on and off screen. The movie features the first all-LGBTQ+ cast and tackles some very important ~therapy themes~!
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Want to see for yourself? Click here to watch the trailer for Bros.
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy... it's an episode about being sexy online. In this day and age, some people are leading hypersexual double lives on the internet which is causing an array of mental health symptoms to crop up. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about social media pressure, hyperreality and hypersexuality, the pressures one might feel to engage in these behaviours, and why this might be occurring. Sex sells-- even on the internet-- and we're here to unpack it!
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Article: Why Some Queer Men Lead Hypersexual Double Lives Online
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy...but this is an episode about learning from our mistakes. Jake and Simon reach into two #lovelylistener stories with their grubby little paws to discuss what it means to regret our mistakes vs. to not have any regrets at all (YOLO). What's the greatest mistake you ever made and why does it linger over us like a lil gassy cloud? Also, this episode may or may not feature a special guest from down under.
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
This Isn't Therapy but this is an episode about processing regrets and meeting out shadow parts! Ooooo, spooky! What are the feelings behind regrets? Why do they feel so bad? What are shadow parts?! What follows is a casual kelly convo between Jake and Simon as they dive into two #lovelylistener stories - one about cheating and one about not spending enough time with a loved one before they passed away.
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't Therapy-- it's an episode about the not/new trend of "Quiet Quitting." In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about the pros and cons of quitting quietly. They also talk about "quiet firing", Gen-Z and the effect of social media on work culture, and the passive aggressive nature of non-communication. Tune in to find out if quiet quitting is for you!
Article: Quiet quitting, firing, even dumping: Americans are falling in love with passive-aggression, and it’s hurting our careers, relationships, and mental health.
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy, baby, it's the two year celebration episode. In this episode, Jake and Simon answer listener questions and ask questions of each other. They talk about family grief, use of social media, what they hate about queer culture, and a very exciting announcement!
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't Therapy but this is a conversation about working through grief and loss. Jake and Simon read two stories from our #lovelylisteners. The first, explores letting go of a partner and the other, about the recent loss of a loved one. What follows is a convo about the stages of grief (DABDA!) and so many metaphors - boulders, balls, and jars, oh my! Also, grab your spelunking gear because we're going down that rabbit hole: what function does loss and grief serve?! Okay, Wendy?!
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
Hello, hi! This isn't therapy, it's a chitchat about how to navigate periods of change and growth. You know what they say: Change is inevitable and the only constant in life is change. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about how to stay the course when change is too destabilizing. They also talk about an essential therapy question: Is this something I can change or is this something I need to accept?
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
Thissssss isn't therapy, y'all, it's the sequel to the episode about therapy myths. In this episode, Jake and Simon discuss more of the myths about therapy by answering the questions submitted by the lovely listeners. They tackle questions such as: What happens if you run into a client in public? Are you intentional about what you wear and how you design the therapy room? How do you keep stories straight? And do you ever not know what to say as a therapist?
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy... it's an episode about the end of "Forced Fun" in the workplace. Jake and Simon discuss a BBC article that discusses how "the pandemic put an end to required birthday cupcakes, team happy hours, and 'forced fun’ activities." Jake and Simon chat about whether forcing fun is good or bad for our cultures at work and what we can do to solve the problem of forced fun.
Article: The death of 'mandatory fun' in the office by Kate Morgan
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode Mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy... it's a conversation about navigating a difference of opinions. In this episode, Jake and Simon ask the lovely listeners to submit a story about a time they had a difference of opinion with someone and it didn't ruin the relationship. They discuss how they approach having disagreements without throwing others in the garbage for thinking or feeling differently.
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy... it's a conversation about breaking up with a friend. In this episode, Jake and Simon share two stories from the lovely listeners about how they know it's time to say goodbye to a friend and how they know when a friendship has run its course.
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy... it's part two of our conversation about Foreboding Joy. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about how the act of foreboding joy protects us from shame and judgment and serves as a reminder that feeling good isn't permanent.
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy -- it's a discussion about foreboding joy. Coined by Dr. Brene Brown, foreboding joy is described as that moment when joy is interrupted by thoughts of “but what if something bad happens.” In this two-part episode, Jake and Simon discuss the ways we avoid feeling extremely happy to avoid feeling extremely disappointed.
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy, but it's a long-awaited conversation about Big Box Therapy™ companies. Jake and Simon dive deep into the world of digitizing mental healthcare - they talk data privacy, accessibility, and the blurred lines of being a tech company and a healthcare provider. Be sure to read the article linked below for background info about this important discussion.
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
"Why therapists are sounding the alarm on big box therapy companies" by Jacalyn Wetzel.
Link to article: https://www.upworthy.com/why-therapists-are-ringing-the-alarm-on-big-box-therapy-companies
This isn't therapy, but it is a conversation about common myths about therapy. Jake and Simon asked their lovely listeners to submit their need-to-know questions about therapy without holding back. Jake and Simon answer questions such as: Do therapists have favourite clients? Do therapists have therapists? What happens if a therapist is sexually attracted to a client? You didn't hold back, so neither did they!
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: @mswjake
Simon Paluck: @directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy... and we don't talk about Bruno (no, no, no, no). In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about intergenerational trauma through the lens of the hit Disney movie Encanto. They talk about how trauma patterns are passed down through families from generation to generation and dissect the themes that show up in the movie and in real life.
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst @mswjake
Simon Paluck @directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy, but this is an episode about loneliness. Jake and Simon chat about the ways that loneliness shows up in our lives and talk about the crisis of connection we all seem to be experiencing to some degree. They unpack what makes us feel lonely and how to increase meaningful connections in our lives.
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
www.instagram.com/notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon Paluck: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy, but this is an episode about boundaries. The pandemic has caused a noticeable shift in the way we interact and spend time with others. Jake and Simon talk about what boundaries are and how to know if you need them or not. They go through the five different types of boundaries and walk us through how to set better boundaries in order to get what you need in life.
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast www.instagram.com/notatherapypodcast Jake Ernst: www.instagram.com/mswjake Simon Paluck: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
Forming new habits that last is hard to do. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about why that is and how to build habits that stick. They talk about the science of forming a new habit and discuss how habits, both good and bad, affect our mental health.
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
www.instagram.com/notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon Paluck: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
Cue the "New Year, New Me" resolution machine. This isn't therapy but in this episode we check in on how your resolutions are going. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about the types of resolutions that typically fail and unpack the barriers that get in our way of following through on goals and resolutions.
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
www.instagram.com/notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon Paluck: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but it is an episode about receiving feedback that might be hard to hear. Jake and Simon read submissions from the lovely listeners and share their own stories about how they receive tough feedback. Let's get into it!
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
www.instagram.com/notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon Paluck: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by #1 bossbabe Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but it is an episode about relationships and the four signs that might signal the end of one. In this episode, Jake and Simon discuss Dr. John & Julie Gottman's concept of The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. These relationship researchers have identified the four traits and their associated behaviours that could lead to relational collapse. Check out the article below for more information!
Article referenced: https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-four-horsemen-recognizing-criticism-contempt-defensiveness-and-stonewalling/
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
www.instagram.com/notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon Paluck: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
Hello, season two! This isn't therapy but it is our grand re-entrance into our regularly scheduled programming. In this episode, Jake and Simon have a check-in chat about where we're at and how we're feeling in this stage of the pandemic. They also imagine what our post-pandemic future will look like and what we can do right now to manage fear and uncertainty.
Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
www.instagram.com/notatherapypodcast
Jake Ernst: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon Paluck: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but this is a conversation about breaking up with your therapist. Join Simon and Jake as they talk about how to know it's time to find a better fit.
Annnnnd! Follow us on Instagram @notatherapypodcast
www.instagram.com/notatherapypodcast
We’d love to hear what you think!
Get in touch with us:
Jake Ernst: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon Paluck: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but this is a conversation about psychological and emotional safety (what!?!) and the pathways we travel to feel safe again. This week, we discuss the Routes of Safety model - a therapeutic tool that helps us achieve a felt sense of safety.
Content note: Discussion of self-harm (27:48-31:44)
We’d love to hear what you think!
Get in touch with us:
Jake Ernst: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon Paluck: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but this is a conversation about Nature vs. Nurture. This week, we discuss themes from the hit Disney+ movie Cruella to guide our discussion about trauma, relationships, childhood experiences, epigenetics, and more. We also talk about Internal Family Systems, a therapy modality developed by Dr. Richard Schwartz, to discuss the role our 'parts' play in shaping who we are.
We’d love to hear what you think!
Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but this is part two of our conversation about perfectionism. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about the type of perfectionism that keeps us from getting started. Have you ever put something off for fear that it won't be perfect? Have you ever felt so frozen and immobilized by the task ahead of you? Have you ever kept quiet because you won't say ~the perfect thing~? We dig into these questions and more in this week's episode.
We’d love to hear what you think!
Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but this is Part 2 of the episode where we answer your questions! In this episode, Jake and Simon finish their game of 21 questions by asking each other deep questions about life, mental health, and relationships. Tune in to find out which one of them cries first. :')
We’d love to hear what you think!
Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but this is the episode where we answer your questions! In this episode, Jake and Simon play 21 questions with a list of questions submitted by our lovely listeners. Tune in to hear them answer your questions about life, mental health, vulnerability in friendship, and more. Be sure to check out the next episode, Part 2, where they ask each other their own set of questions! ;-)
We’d love to hear what you think!
Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but this is a conversation about perfectionism. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about how perfectionism can fuel our desire to grind, hustle, and achieve more. They also discuss how perfectionism can foster a culture of competition and how we can stop it from dominating our thoughts, feelings, and behaviour.
We’d love to hear what you think!
Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but this is the final episode in our four-part pandemic series. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about The Big Return and what life could look like beyond face masks and pandemic restrictions. They also discuss how our cultures might shift and how we can adjust to The "New" Normal. P.S. Like, comment, subscribe, give us a rate! We will love you forever for doing so.
We’d love to hear what you think!
Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but this is a timely episode about pandemic burnout. In part three of this pandemic series, Jake and Simon talk about how burnout keeps us locked into patterns of stress. They also discuss how burnout results in that "blah" feeling and how it impacts something known as our "surge capacity". P.S. Tune in to the end of the episode for a fun ~contest~ where you can win a ~fabulous prize~!
We’d love to hear what you think!
Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but this is an episode about the social struggles we anticipate beyond pandemic times. In part two of this pandemic series, Jake and Simon talk about how pandemic social anxiety might manifest and how we can work through it. They discuss Jake's recent appearance on the CBC podcast Sickboy and make a big mess in the final segment (sorry, Jean-Luc Picard!).
We’d love to hear what you think!
Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but this is an episode about pandemic anxiety & masking up for the greater good. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about pandemic rules and share their thoughts & feelings about anti-vaccination and anti-mask rhetoric. In one of the stories, a listener asks what they can do when friends and family members exhibit some wack pandemic behaviour.
We’d love to hear what you think!
Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but this is an episode about adult friendships. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about deep & meaningful BFF-style friendships while braiding each other’s hair. They talk about how to make friends as an adult, what makes our friends want to stick around, and the boys they wish would notice them! You know what they say: There are big ships and tall ships but the best ships are friendships.
We’d love to hear what you think!
Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but this is an episode about our friendships in childhood. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about the stories they heard about early friendships. What makes a quality childhood friendship? What happens when we drift in and out of these friendships? What are the qualities that make a friendship long and worthwhile? All of these and more -- tonight at 6pm!
We’d love to hear what you think!
Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
This isn't therapy but this is an episode about the difference between social relationships and therapeutic relationships. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about an article by Megan Wildhood who suggests that "the professionalization of mental health services is ruining friendships," (2021). They talk about the history of the helping profession and interrogate the claim that therapy is ruining friendships. P.S. Jake and Simon are joined by special guest Brandon the Therapy Frog!
We’d love to hear what you think! Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
Link to article: https://www.madinamerica.com/2021/01/ruining-friendship/
This isn't therapy but this is an episode about impostor syndrome. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about the common experience of not feeling good enough, smart enough, and not measuring up. They talk about the mechanics of impostor syndrome and how it can cause us to feel out of place and disconnected from others. We also find out the name of ~the frog~ from our last episode!
We’d love to hear what you think! Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
Submit an episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
This isn't therapy but this is an episode about anxiety and overthinking. In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about our most highly requested topic to date - anxiety - and discuss what it might look like and feel like. They talk about the ways overthinking can keep us trapped in thought spirals and share a story about "Das Anxiety Balloon" - what!?
We’d love to hear what you think! Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
Submit an episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
This isn't therapy but this is an episode about 2020. In this episode, Jake and Simon re-visit the concept of Big Talk and ask each other deep questions about their experiences from this year. They talk about pandemic productivity and some of the big feelings they felt this year.
We’d love to hear what you think! Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
Submit an episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
This isn't therapy but this is an episode about mindfulness -- or what Jake calls "meeting the moment". In this episode, Jake and Simon pitch a new chocolatey business model to therapy icon Brene Brown and talk about how to make the most of every moment.
We’d love to hear what you think! Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
Submit an episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
This isn't therapy but it is an episode about Toxic Positivity!!!! In this episode, Jake and Simon talk about how being overly positive may not be as helpful as one might think. Disclaimer: This episode has no relations to the hit single "Toxic" by Britney Spears.
We’d love to hear what you think! Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
Submit an episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
This isn't therapy but it is an episode about ~Instagram Therapy~ and the "wellness industrial complex" (WHAT?!). In this episode, Jake talks about his experience as a therapist who uses social media to showcase his work and Simon wants you to DM to collab!
We’d love to hear what you think! Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
Submit an episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
This isn't therapy but it is an episode about the first session in therapy. Jake and Simon talk about contacting a therapist for the first time and finding your therapeutic match. Tune in to hear about Simon's first impressions of the first session!
We’d love to hear what you think! Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
Submit an episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
This isn't therapy but it is a conversation about connection and connecting to ourselves. Jake and Simon talk about our eight (yes, eight!) senses and how that changes our ability to connect with and fully experience the world.
We’d love to hear what you think! Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
Submit an episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
This isn't therapy but it is a conversation about the concepts of rupture and repair in relationships. Jake and Simon talk about what rupture can look like and why an intentional practice of repair is a fundamental process for overcoming disconnection in relationships.
We’d love to hear what you think! Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Episode mixed by Jordan Paluck
Submit an episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
We’d love to hear what you think! Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Mixed by Jordan Paluck
Cover art by Darryl Mabey www.instagram.com/mabeyitsart
Submit an episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
Closed Captioning Available: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EChNkNeWEIQ&t=4s
Note: This is our first discussion in a series of episodes about finding a therapist and starting therapy. We will continue to revisit this topic. This episode is not meant to be a complete or full representation about the process of finding a therapist.
Resources discussed: Psychology Today www.psychologytoday.com
We’d love to hear what you think! Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Mixed by Jordan Paluck
Cover art by Darryl Mabey www.instagram.com/mabeyitsart
Submit an episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
Closed Captioning Available: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3Xouv3oW-k
We’d love to hear what you think! Get in touch with us:
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Mixed by Jordan Paluck
Cover art by Darryl Mabey www.instagram.com/mabeyitsart
Submit an episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com
Closed Captioning Available: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=91p9MbPKX_A
Like what you heard? Get in touch with us!
Jake: www.instagram.com/mswjake
Simon: www.instagram.com/directedbysimon
Mixed by Jordan Paluck
Cover art by Darryl Mabey www.instagram.com/mabeyitsart
Submit an episode idea: thisisnttherapypodcast@gmail.com