Rocking the Journey: Recent Episodes
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Ann believes “we are all responsible for writing the scripts of our own lives” and that taking the time to understand and work on ‘what is my script today and what’s it going to look like in 10 years -time’? - helps achieve happiness.
Is there still a glass ceiling for women?
Ann Olivarius, powerful champion of women’s rights, ground-breaking feminist lawyer, and philanthropist, strongly believes the glass ceiling is still in place - and that women still struggle to influence the workplace, shape cultures and impact leadership to change Systemic behaviours.
She questions whether we have really moved that far in the last twenty years and whether women are truly heard and their contribution as valued as that of their male counterparts. She believes women must be greater activists in order to shape the contemporary businesses of the future and this starts within our own homes – making positive changes and influencing the people closest to us first. The ripple effect can be powerful.
“No doubt a few have gotten through (to the top) but it hasn’t changed or progressed as much as I thought it would or should. I thought if you worked hard enough as a woman and were focused and the world was yours – that was such a naive view – no matter how hard you work or how good you are, how excellent you are in mind and spirit and integrity there are still blockages”.
When I saw a new book out called ‘Fat Cow, Fat Chance’ and it was by Jenni Murray, I knew I had to take notice!
The journalist and broadcaster who presented BBC Radio 4’s Women’s Hour until last year, manages to pull off both an intimate portrayal of a women challenged by a body shape that has yoyo’d throughout her life and a very informative look at why diets don’t work.
Whilst the book is about the science and psychology of body shape it’s also an intimate perspective on the relationship we have with our bodies - the continual dieting, trying keeping weight off and people not realising that body shaming is not just incredibly cruel, but it just doesn’t work.
I love that it's a mix of very personal story that I think many of us, if not all at some point in our lives, can relate to and really useful technical information about eating habits
Shocked into doing something by a comment her son made about her mobility, Jenni decided to stop hiding away her size and putting on an Oscar performance that size didn’t matter, and went in search of a solution.
Why are we women less likely to believe we can be wealthy and yet at the same time we can be more successful as investors
And given our reticence, why are more women engaging in sustainable investing?
Cleona Lira a Financial Adviser specialising in building investment portfolios for women shares her perspectives on:
- Why women are more affected by climate change and therefore can benefit more from the impact of sustainable investing
- How ‘being stewards of the earth’ connects us more to the sustainable principles
- The barriers to us taking the first step; fear of making mistakes, shame around having more money than others, confusion around the financial process
- The virtue of patience and not over controlling the process - women tend to trust more which can reap greater rewards over the long term
I felt a strong alignment between our own coaching ethos and the approach Cleona takes, particularly around the deep listening and non-violent communication which really helps to get the ‘why’ someone wants to invest and their deep beliefs around money.
At a time when so many of us are working towards ‘planet positive’ it feels like a great time to be thinking about this topic. And perhaps as important - to ensure we get to feel more empowered and confident about the role money plays in helping us live life to the full💃
And for more information on Cleona’s approach to financial planning: https://www.cleonalira.co.uk
Please note: This interview reflects personal opinion & should never be considered as Financial advice.
As a clinical psychologist Dr Lara Pence has spend the last decade working with elite athletes, business leaders and individuals as they peel back their outer shell, cast aside unhealthy patterns that are keeping them stuck and unfulfilled and begin to build a new more resilient and adventurous sense of self.
But be warned, says Dr Pence, this isn't easy. This straight talking mind doctor is out to call out the "quick fix" approach where people try to hot-wire inspiration, motivation and momentum without first putting in the hard work to understand who they really are.
Curiosity, says says, is the super power that can lead us all to a better, richer, more authentic life.
Lots of tips here about how to live better and improve mental and physical performance
It was only when Gill Whitty-Collins, author of Why Men Win at Work, reached the top of a global consumer company that she realised how sexist the workplace can be,
In a provocative call to arms she urges all men and women to take action now for better diversity friendly workplaces so that everybody can reach their potential.
According to a report by the management consultancy Mckinsey the business case for diversity has never been stronger - put simply those companies with more diverse boards perform better on every scale.
By researching the top 7% of women who do reach the highest positions Gill reveals some fascinating insights... worth listening just for these.
Keeping women emotionally and physically safe in the courtroom, in the family, on the streets and within organisations is everybody's business.
So says Baroness Helena Kennedy QC in this powerful call to arms for more men and women to be bolder and call out injustice wherever we see it.
As one of Britain's most distinguished human rights lawyers, Helena says she has seen throughout her career the terrible consequences of unchallenged male entitlement.
A fabulous, fearless and wise voice for a change to a better, more compassionate, more equal society.
Such an important conversation for all of us.
Enjoy and visit us at www.rockmyage.com
The idea of ‘democratiSing therapy’ is such a powerful idea and a much-needed mission in the world today, that I couldn't wait to speak with Clare Laurent – one of the founders of SHRINK. It’s an app that literally ‘puts therapy in your pocket’. Clare started life as a corporate lawyer and was, amongst other tech companies, General Counsel for AOL. She jumped ship from corporate life when she had a family at 38 yrs old and in 2008 began a journey into psychotherapy doing a Masters in Organisational Psychology specialising in Women’s Careers and a PHD in Mentoring.
We chatted about the themes we find women our age can most often struggle with and can affect their wellbeing and mental health such as: what does the next phase of life look like, fear of giving up a long-term job, finding purpose and fulfilment after the children have left home, becoming invisible, isolation, building confidence and financial security. And we agree how important it is to have good friends, family, community or a trusted sounding board to share and discuss these aspects of their life with.
Join Erika as she chats with Tim Malnick on the role of money in our lives, it was an eye opener – and really got us thinking…
Tim who founded Different Space - is a coach, facilitator and a passionate activist on sustainability, runs money workshops that are focused on helping us become more conscious about how money impacts our lives. I really resonated with many of the themes Tim explores and the idea that understanding how we see money and how it links with many of our other mental constructs, determines whether we ‘live a rich life’ or not.
Join Erika as she talks with Tamsin Calidas about leaving the rat race and restarting in a rural idyll.
In 2004 Tamsin Calidas the author of I am an Island, disenchanted with life in London and after a terrible accident moved to a remote Island in the Scottish Hebrides. Her life changed beyond anything she could have imagined, although, she does say at the beginning that she had….
’The dream of living a wilder life – lifting your eyes above the skyline’
We don't often get to hear the inside story of an adoption and less so the voices of both the parent(s) adopting and the voice and experience of the child.
In Margaret Reynolds book The Wild Track we get to hear both those voices and the intimate and often very challenging journey Margaret (Peggy) went on for seven years to finally one day bring her daughter Lucy home.
She shares both their different experiences of that actual day when she went to pick Lucy up. Her own being one of ‘getting it done’ and following the advice of the social workers – get in and get out, and the very different experience that Lucy was going through - being wrenched away from her foster family with very little explanation of why she was leaving them, what would happen next and for how long she was going to be parted from them.
Margaret (Peggy) shares that going through the often brutal adoption process really required her look at her own life and childhood and the realisation she was, in effect, a migrant from Australia and how because she (and Lucy) had both moved around a lot at a young age – the sense of home and belonging was so important for them – the nurture and sense of stability.
With gender relationships high on the agenda at the moment a very timely conversation with leadership coach Liz Rivers.
Starting life as a litigation lawyer helped Liz understand the characteristics of an alpha male environment - and she now works with organisations to help men and women have the difficult conversations that need to be had about equality, respect and compassion.
We talk about the challenges of breaking down the patriarchal system and how we need to come together to create a new way of working and being.
Erika speaks with Lauren Cross, a reproductive warrior, about her own very personal journey of creating a family through egg donation after being diagnosed with a rare chromosome disorder and how today with a family of three, she is creating brave and safe spaces for others to talk about pregnancy issues, infertility and parenting after reproductive trauma.
Erika talks with Rachel Ley Actor and Vocal coach on how the power of the voice can help build our confidence and how the quality of the words we use can raise and not deplete our energy.
The fabulous Professor Norman Lazarus is 85, medication free, a long distance cycler and last year authored the Sunday Times best selling book The Lazarus Strategy. Part manifesto and part self-help book the Lazarus Strategy calls on us all to take control of how we age. And the good news is that whilst genes play a part, it is lifestyle that is the key factor in how we go on to enjoy our later years or not.
Professor Lazarus knows his stuff! For the past three decades he has been studying the science behind ageing and what we can do about it as a Professor at King's College London.
Here we delve deep into his three key pillars - what we eat and how much we eat, how much exercise we do and what our mindset is like. He believes that modern medicine is still failing to make the very important link between body and mind.
Professor Lazarus' positive attitude is so infectious that one can't help thinking that 85 looks ok if we can all be as fit and positive as him. And the doctor says for most people it is all within our control but we need to start getting serious about how we live, eat and move.
Talking to surrogacy lawyer Natalie Sutherland about the complexities of the surrogacy process and the joy of helping others to create or grow their family. We have both been following the column “The Mother Project” by Award winning journalist Sophie Beresiner in the Sunday Times Style magazine and discussed not just her journey but the often sensitive issues that Natalie helps people work through
I have witnessed Pam at work - a thoroughly professional, compassionate yet brave steely leader. For me she captures the essence of what a good female leader is starting to look like. Hugely talented, driven and authoritative - but at same time authentic, fearless around admitting vulnerability and full of love for the people that she manages and for her patients. It reminds me of the kind of attributes that are being so celebrated on the national stage with leaders like Jacinda Ardern and Sanna Marin.
Here she talks of the personal cost of getting to the top in the über competitive and male dominated world of medical research. She has some great advice for women looking to enter or develop in this field and explains why she is very hopeful for a more level playing field in the future.
Demonstrating grit and resilience at the deepest level she talks about the children that she has cared for with cancer and how copes when a child dies.
There seems to be so much conflicting advice around about what you should and shouldn't do re exercise as women hit their 40s and beyond. Should you run? Should you avoid it? How much exercise do you need and how do you protect your joints.
One thing we've noticed is the number of women who are having back and shoulder issues during the pandemic. Do we need expensive physio or other interventions? Or is the key to keeping pain free all about regular movement. Here
Camilla from Camilla Lister Fitness, a PT who specialises in supporting women through the peri-menopause/the menopause and beyond - sets the record straight. And yes, sorry ladies, seems like running is good at any age (that's an eeeek! for me someone who hates running).
Distortions or obsessions with our body image can follow us through life and are surprisingly common, so says one of the best known body image psychologists in the US - Dr Emily Sandoz from the University of Louisiana and author of the best selling book Living with your Body and other things you HATE.
We might think telling little girls they are pretty or little boys they are handsome is harmless and just shows how much we love and admire them.
But if done too much, and without equal praise for what they are doing and accomplishing, this can set up a train of events that can lead to a person placing their value only on their outward appearance and this has all kinds of negative knock on effects re our psychological wellbeing.
Here Emily advises how we should all, whatever our age, start first and foremost with what makes us happy and allows us to live out our unique potential. She cautions that we should use so called “beauty tweaks and treatments” with care as even hair straightening can lead to emotional hits that need to keep being repeated to retain the feel good factor.
Full of fantastic down-to-earth advice on how to live the best possible life whatever your age and circumstances.
When we have spent most of our life working, often in the corporate arena, leaving that world, defining a new role and finding direction, meaning and fulfilment can often be daunting, particularly when we are nearing ‘retirement’ age. And what does retirement mean now anyway – is there such a thing?
Kim Sharan spent over 35 years in financial services and held C Suite roles for 25 years. She recently hung up her corporate shoes and speaks candidly about what it has meant to carve out a new role, find a renewed sense of purpose and reinvigorate some long held passions. Kim 2.0 as she says, ‘is still work in progress’ – which at Rock My Age, we can hugely relate to. Right now it feels a good time to be working out how and where we want to live and what we want to be doing to bring the greatest joy to our lives and be catalysts for good in the world – just a few small thoughts to keep us busy!
For anyone whose; left work recently and isn’t quite sure how to find a place in the world, is in work and thinking of changing up their life, or for those just dreaming of it for now - this is an interview for you…
Sue Wood, an advanced Yoga, Tai Chi and Qigong seasonal trainer, believes that we would all live more healthily - physically, emotionally and spiritually - if we paid more attention to the natural energy of the seasons. She says that winter, with its focus on retreating to renew the earth's natural energies, is a great time to do some necessary inner strength work.
Here she speaks with Debbie about how we can all work to strengthen our inner worlds so that we are better placed to deal with the natural rhythms and changes of the world. She says that the current pandemic offers us all an opportunity to reset our lives and to think more deeply about who we are and how we want to live.
She advises everybody to take more care of themselves, of our loved ones, our community and our planet. As a lifelong meditator she urges everyone to take this time to slow down for a moment and savour the moment.
A wonderful inspiring/hopeful talk from a seasoned professional who lives by her own guidance.
Rabbi Jonathan Romain MBE is a writer and broadcaster and Minister of the Maidenhead Synagogue in Berkshire in the UK. He writes regularly for The Times, The Independent, The Guardian, The Huffington Post and The Jewish Chronicle and he appears regularly on radio and TV. His latest book Confessions of a Rabbi is a candid, poignant and very funny look into the human condition. It contains little that is explicitly religious - instead it is a collection of everyday life in its saddest and funniest moments. We highly recommend it!
He is our first male guest as we think what he has to say about living life well applies to all and transcends different faiths.
Here he speaks with Debbie about his views on women in religion (reveals that is wife is a Rabbi too), says change is a very necessary part of life and calls for more kindness, understanding and compassion in the World.
Rock My Age brings this conversation to you as part of our series on living life wisely. We will be speaking to other religious and secular thought leaders on what they think is involved in living a good purposeful life.
From professional Ballerina, to chef and now author, Natasha MacAller shares her journey spanning these three extraordinary careers - each an art form in its own right and requiring discipline, dedication and technique. Now a restaurant consultant and author, Natasha’s most recent book ‘Spice Health Heroes’ opens our eyes to the role spices play in our overall health and wellbeing.
‘Having a lawyer by your side is good, but having a divorce coach by your side is priceless’. In a highly informative and invaluable conversation, Emma Heptonstall – a former lawyer, family mediator, coach and high conflict specialist - shares how to be ‘a proactive participant in your own divorce’, establish a strategy that ensures objectivity and how to maintain emotional wellbeing throughout.
World wide grief expert Donna Lancaster chats with Debbie and Erika about how loss, in all its forms, is part of everyone's life. She says it is unprocessed grief that puts us at risk of depression, low mood or simply an inability to find joy. Here she gives some wise advice about how we can all benefit from taking time to process transitions and advises that bodywork and dance are an important part of healing.
A lovely uplifting conversation for difficult times.
IN CONVERSATION with Sue Woodd - Master Practitioner in Seasonal Yoga, Tai Chi and Qigong.
Sue Woodd shares her views on how to heal through body and mind work and says that lockdown is the ideal opportunity to progress our personal spiritual journeys.
IN CONVERSATION with Belinda Plant - Where Style Meets Soul.
Style, colour and identity: powerful factors in one woman’s journey to finding her voice and speaking her truth.
In my conversation with the eclectic and inspirational Belinda Plant we explore how Bel's journey in life has influenced her love of colour and style, her passion for empowering young women and something that has become her signature and symbol of personal identity – these amazingly colourful head dresses.
IN CONVERSATION with Anita Brightley-Hodges - Entrepreneur, creative force, Mother and Grandmother talks leadership.
Anita Brightley-Hodges - Specialist Family Business Advisor - talks about what gets her up in the morning, highs and lows of running a business, building wells in Africa and the importance of having purpose.
IN CONVERSATION with Paula Kerr - Talks about resilience, courage and vulnerability.
Debbie talks to Paula about how a health set back opened up a whole new life and career for this former tabloid news journalist.
IN CONVERSATION with the marvellous Sophie Mirman of Trotters - founder of Tie Rack and Sock Shop.
Sophie’s many business accolades include: in 1988 she received the prestigious Veuve Clicquot Businesswoman of the Year Award, as well as the Marketing Woman of the Year Award and in 1990, she received the Motivator of the Year Award.
In this fascinating interview Sophie’s humanity and humility shine through as she talks of a clear set of values and principles that have guided through her professional and personal life.
As the founder and now creative director of Trotters the children’s emporium she says she has huge energy for what lies ahead in her life and career and can never imagine retiring.
A wonderful role model for women of all ages who want to become entrepreneurs.
IN CONVERSATION with Rara Plumptre - Childhood passions helped with healing.
How the chance meeting of a singing teacher and the return to childhood passions helped Rara Plumptre heal from divorce and open the next chapter of her amazing life. Erika Uffindell interviews Rara on her passion for helping the homeless and her work as a Divorcee Angel and how adversity can bring you a both lesson and a blessing - in that order! Rara's mantra 'go slowly and go well' is a great mantra for these times...
IN CONVERSATION with Dame Stephanie Shirley - Emotional wellbeing, careers and legacy.
As an unaccompanied kindertransport child, Dame Stephanie arrived in the UK aged five clutching her nine year old sister's hand.
Fleeing Nazi Germany in such a horrendous way has, she says, shaped her whole life and one wonders did it drive her on to break so many barriers for herself and for women in general.
She became the UK's first female tech entrepreneur setting up a company selling software, when nobody realised that anyone could make money out of software. She grew that company with a female only workforce and was one of the first to introduce flexible and home working.
The company grew from strength to strength, she transferred ownership to the workers and when it was sold she made 70 women millionaires overnight.
Now one of the UK's most generous philanthropists, she says giving her fortune away has made her far happier than amassing it in the first place.
She also speaks with heartbreaking honesty about the loss of her only child Giles, who suffered from severe autism, her battle with her own emotional wellbeing and what she wants her legacy to be.
An extraordinary woman. An extraordinary human being.
IN CONVERSATION with Jacqui Smith - Handling intense professional and personal scrutiny, and the necessity for resilience.
Debbie chats with Jacqui Smith, the UK's first ever female Home Secretary.
In this raw open interview Jacqui talks about life in high office and what happens afterwards when it all falls apart. Now an award winning podcaster and chair of one of the UK's largest NHS Trust, Jacqui looks back at how she handled the intense professional and personal media scrutiny that came with her political life and the toll it took on her and her family. Now she says she is happier and more self confident than ever.
At 57 she says she is still ambitious and that there are still some roles she would like to take on. Apart from needing "an afternoon nap" she is as forceful, energetic and buzzing with warmth and ideas as ever.
She says she wants to be remembered as "somebody who had a successful career and then used it to help others".
What a pleasure it was to speak to a woman who has been at the top, fallen and bounced back again, demonstrated extraordinary resilience and inner steel - but still remains a very grounded, warm and empathic woman.
Boil the kettle, sit back and enjoy, as Debbie and Jacqui chat about all the things that are important to us women at any age.