Fuel The Flame: Recent Episodes

Alan Kim

Your Marriage is like a fire that needs to be fueled. We need to be intentional about building our marriage at any cost. So, tune in every week for tips in how to fuel the fire of your marriage. Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/alan-kim/support

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What kind of perception do we have? There are several perceptions that we can have to help us see things. sometimes they're helpful and sometimes they're hurtful. Listen and learn how to get the right perception of our marriage.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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Marriage is hard and it takes lots of time, effort, and resources. Often times we quit way before the finish line, then get remarried. Then get another divorce. Why do we do this? How do we stop this behavior? Listen to this podcast and learn what does it takes to be married only once in your life.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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We can use different strategies in life to help us makes things easier. The same is with our marriage, we need to do the little things that matters to our spouse. When we start doing these little things in our marriage, it's going to make a big difference in our life.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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No such thing as a perfect spouse. All marriages go through these stages of marriage. Once we know and go through these stages. We are building a strong and healthy marriage.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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We all have needs. We try our best to meet our needs, but in marriage we need to meet our spouses needs. Here are the 4 important needs for a male and 4 important needs for a female. Try your best at meeting those needs.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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Everything in life has rules and regulations. The bible has the 10 Commandments. Marriage also has 10 Commandments. Listen to commandments 6-10 and learn how to build a strong marriage.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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Everything in life has rules. From sports to science. The bible has the 10 Commandments. So does marriage have 10 commandments to have a strong marriage. Listen to the first 5 commandments and learn how to have a healthy marriage.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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With so many voices, opinions, and beliefs. Who are we listening to? What are we believing in, when it comes to our marriage? We need these people in our life and marriage, to help us navigate through the tough times of marriage. We need to find them and keep them--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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When we start doing things that will destroy our life, marriage, and family. It's the beginning of losing everything. We need to be aware of what we are doing and never play with fire. Or we will end up destroying everything.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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We are all prideful people. We do what we want to and nobody can tell us what to do. Humility is the key to having a successful marriage. When we choose to humble ourselves, things start to change for us. We have to choose to humble ourselves or eat humble pie in public.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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It's not how we start, but how we finish. Just like running a race, we start off strong. Then we hit the wall. Our marriage is the same, we have a joyous wedding day. Then we hit things that hinder our marriage. Listen and learn how to finish strong in our marriage.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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What is an authentic love? How does it look like? We cannot have a cheap, fake love. But, a love that will build a strong and healthy marriage. Listen and learn how to have an authentic love in your marriage.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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Our love affects our spouse's emotional state. We can either deposit or withdrawal from their emotional bank, which can lead to depression. Learn how to make more deposits than withdrawl--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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Authentic love has its benefits. One benefit is that, it can affect our spouse's appearance. We can make our spouse look better, by choosing to love our spouse authentically. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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Life can be busy and stressful. We have lots of things we have to accomplish. We shouldn't let other areas of our life collide with our marriage. Learn this art of hat changing and see how it's a game changer.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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Like everything in life, marriage needs rules. Marriage needs rules to help us protect our marriage and make it healthy. We need to set up some rules in our marriage, so we can build it to be strong.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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It's not just the level of our love, but the quality of our love. We can have a cheap, knock off type of love. Or an authentic high quality type of love. Listen and learn how to have an high quality type of love.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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We are masters of playing fake scenarios in our mind. When our minds affect our emotions, perception, and decisions. We need to always tell ourselves the truth, so we can have a strong marriage.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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Communication is big in a marriage. We have to give our spouse a voice in our marriage, to have open, honest, and healthy conversations. There cannot be anger, retaliation, and blame in our marriage. We have to talk about everything and anything.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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We can busy with life, work, church and marriage. We will get burned out in the process. We need to take care of ourselves also, to have a strong and healthy marriage.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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Marriage takes two. It's a husband and wife working together as one. Are you and your spouse teammates or opponents? Listen and learn how to work together with your spouse.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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We complain in our marriage, "you don't understand me"! When the goal of marriage is to understand our spouse first. Listen to this podcast and learn how to understand each other.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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Is your marriage important to you? Where is your marriage in your life? Look at these areas to see where your marriage is and how to change it.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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All marriages will have fights, arguments, and disagreements. Oftentimes we want to win or be right. This causes a win/lose situation. A strong and healthy marriage always has a win/win result, when both sides win. The marriage wins.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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What are your blueprints for your marriage? What are your spouse's blueprints? Do the match? Do they align with God's blueprint for marriage. Once we get on the same page and set goals for our marriage, watch our marriage start to improve.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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Marriage is intentional. To have a successful marriage, we need to be proactive. We need to always be doing things to build our marriage. If we don't change anything in our marriage, then nothing will change for us. Let's do something to build our marriage.--- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/alan-kim/support

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Oftentimes we expect perfection in our marriage and from our spouse. This can only bring stress to our spouse and fatigue to our marriage. Nobody can meet our expectation of perfection.


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In a Beatles song, the lyrics go "I get by with a little help from my friends..." We cannot do life and marriage alone, we need help from people who love and care for us, people who want the best for us. A way we can find someone to hold us accountable, to ask us the hard questions. People who can correct us and guide us through life and marriage. Listen to this podcast and learn how accountability is valuable to a marriage.

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What comes to mind when it comes to your spouse? Do you have negative thoughts or positive thoughts? You you get angry, irritated, or frustrated? Or do you have love, joy, and peace. It's how we see our spouse and our perspective of that person. Listen and see how should we see our spouse through our mind.

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There is no perfect marriage. We all need help in our marriage. It's a matter of finding the right help, we need people that will help us build our marriage. Listen and find out how to get e right help.

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Are we caring for our spouse? There are many aspects of caring for our spouse. Listen to learn how to take care of our spouse completely.

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We sometimes make bad trades in our marriage. Trades we often regret. Last week we talked about a few of them, listen for more trades we shouldn't make in our marriage.

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We make trades in life. Some swaps are good and some are bad. Listen and learn that we don't make these swaps in our marriage.

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People always ask me, "What is your best advice?" From dating to married 30 years plus. Here are my best advice for a strong and healthy marriage.

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One of the biggest mistakes we can make in marriage, is to change our spouse. We want to make them into our mold. We need to love and accept our spouse as they are. Listen and learn how to love our spouse, instead of changing our spouse.

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Maturity is a big part of who we really are. Without it,our life and marriage will fall apart. Listen and learn what and why maturity is important.

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The real person is what is on the inside. Our character and maturity is the real us. We need these character qualities in us, so we can have a strong marriage.

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Often times we judge our spouse by the outward appearance. Their looks and their body are temporal, but their character lasts forever. Listen to learn what are stages of character and how to grow from them.

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Over the years, our marriage has become dry, hard, and dead. We argue more and fall out of friendship. We don't know what to do, except for divorce. Here are 4 things we can do as spouses to change our marriage in less than a minute.

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We bring the baggage of our past wounds and experiences. We bring behaviors that will destroy our marriage. It's time to remove these 4 negative behaviors from our marriage.

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Do we know how to make our marriage work? Since there is no instructional manuel on how to make our marriage work. Listen to and learn how to make our marriage work.

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Our job is not please our spouse, but to bring happiness to them. We can work to please our spouse, so not to get into trouble. Learn how to bring happiness into your marriage.--- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

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To get to unity, we need to be connecting with our spouse. We need to communicate and accept each other in order to connect on a daily basis.

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We focus on what's important to us and neglect what is not. We need to be more intentional with our marriage. We need to do more of these things to have a strong and healthy marriage.

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Marriage needs a whole lot of loving going on for it to be strong and healthy. Learn the 4 types of love and how it ties into marriage.--- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

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Communication is huge in a marriage. Learn about the stages of communication and how to get to the highest level of communication. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

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Communication is big in a marriage. It's can build or destroy a marriage. Learn what are some communication styles, so you can identify your's and your spouse's. Then you can build healthy communication in your marriage.--- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

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People control others, because it gives us power. The more we control people, the more we damage our relationships. Learn what causes these controlling behaviors and what we need to do to stop.

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Infidelity is a choice. We cannot bring our marriage to the point of adultery. Listen and learn the signs of Infidelity and how to avoid it.

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People often ask me, "Why should I make my marriage a priority?" Bottom line is that God created marriage and ordained it. In the end God will hold us accountable for our marriage. Listen to find out why is our marriage important. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

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One cause of infidelity and divorce is that there is no excitement in the marriage. The flame is gone. We need to keep our marriage alive by doing these things.--- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

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Like the military protects our country, we need to protect our marriage. We need healthy boundaries to protect our marriage.


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Marriage needs boundaries. We need to make our marriage a safe place for our spouse, a place where our spouse can share anything and express themselves.


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When we make marriage about my happiness, to meet my needs. We end up dissatisfied, discontent, and disillusioned. Listen and learn what the purpose of marriage, so you can have a strong and healthy marriage.


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Marriage is for a lifetime and not about perfection. It's about finishing the journey of marriage. Learn how to persevere through the journey of Marriage.


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The goal in marriage is unity. Many times we need to work towards it and fight for it. In the end it will be worth it.


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When we keep taking off a bandage, our wounds won't heal. The same is with our marriage. We tell the whole world our marital problems, our marriage won't heal. Find someone who you can confide in.


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What happens when we don't care for a wound? It will get infected. The same is with our marriage, when we don't care for the little things. They will end up destroying our marriage. Take the steps to heal your marriage.


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If you want to get good at anything, we have to practice, practice, and practice. The same for marriage, if we want to have a strong and healthy marriage. We need to practice these things.


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Our marriage needs tune up from time to time. A checklist helps us to see if we are on the right course to build a strong and healthy marriage. Here is the marriage checklist.


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To have a strong marriage, we meed to know many things about our spouse. We have to talk, ask questions, and observe our spouse. The more we know our spouse, the stronger our marriage is.


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In a culture that tells us to throw away anything that is broken, rather than fix it. Marriage is not the same. Marriage takes grit, perseverance, and commitment. We need to choose stay married no matter the circumstances.


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Addiction is a marriage breaker. It controls a person to self-destruction. Learn the causes of addiction and how to overcome them.


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Many times we have become apathetic in our marriage. We are bored or just don't care about our marriage. Listen as it's important not to have apathy in our marriage.


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We all go through seasons. Many times, it's different with spouses. The key to a healthy and strong marriage is to support each other in every season of life..


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Communication is a big part of a healthy marriage. Having great communication requires good listening skills. Learn how to be a better listener, so you can have a healthy marriage.


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Many times we want a perfect marriage. When there is no such thing as perfection. We need to work towards having a healthy marriage, do that it will last a lifetime.


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Marriage wasn't designed to be "All About Me". So we have to take me out of marriage and make it about we.


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Sex is an important part of marriage. It should never be withheld from our marriage. Sex helps build intimacy in our marriage.


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Boundaries don't hurt us, they help our relationships and marriage. Boundaries protect us from harm and danger. Listen as we learn to put these boundaries in our marriage.


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When our marriage is not important to us, we neglect it, ignore it, and put it on the shelf. Then we stop fighting for our marriage and eventually lose our marriage. The road back to fixing our marriage is a longer and harder road. Let's make our marriage a top priority.


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We buy into so many lies when we're unhappy with our marriage. We begin to compare our marriage with other people's marriages, thinking that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. We have to start watering our side of the fence.


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One of the worst things in marriage is a closed mind. It prevents us from having a strong marriage and a blessed life. Learn what does a closed mind does and also learn how to have an open mind.


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Many times the main cause of a failed marriage is because we fall out of friendship with our spouse. We need to keep the friendship going with our spouse, so we can have a strong marriage.


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The coronavirus was brutal to the world. It affected our health, work, and our relationships. The coronavirus also took a toll on our marriage. Listen to learn how to have our marriage overcome the season of coronavirus.


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One of the destructive thing in our marriage is entitlement. It comes in and deceives us about marriage. We need to lose this spirit of entitlement, so we can have a strong marriage.


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Listen as Tim Kellis and I talk about building a strong marriage. Tim is an expert in helping couples struggle with marriage.


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Many times spouses drift apart, because of the daily routine and struggles. It's time to come back to each other and build a strong marriage.


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Life is full of cycles, some good and some bad. We have to deal with these vicious cycles, before they destroy our marriage.


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Communication is big in a marriage. We need conversations in our marriage to build communication. Here are several conversations we need to have in our marriage.


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Marriage requires lots of changes. From our mind to our perception. Here are more things we need to change to have a strong and successful marriage.


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We often start our marriage strong, completely in love with each other. As the years past our marriage fades, because we are not building it properly. Here is how we build a strong marriage.


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Our feelings for our spouse comes and goes, because of the hardships of marriage. We have to choose to do these, to have a strong and successful marriage.


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We allow certain things to come into marriage that will end up destroying our marriage. We have to recognize these foxes and rid them from our marriage.


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Our past is what made us who we are today. We need to use the past to help our present and our future.


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We often check out of and quit on our marriage to quickly. Divorce ruins many lives and should never be brought up. We need to do these things to avoid divorce at all cost.


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Many couples experience the pain of infidelity and ask, "can we overcome this?" Here is the answer and tips on how to get through infidelity.


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Love is an action and not just words. As we conclude season 2,I challenge you to practice these things. So that your Marriage will be strong.


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How are you doing with this challenge? Are you practicing showing love to your spouse? Listen today on more ways to love our spouse.


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Love is an action and needs to be shown. I dare you to these actions to improve your marriage.


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Love is an action that needs to be shown daily. Here are 4 challenges to do to help you build a strong marriage.


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Love is more than a feeling, but an action that needs to be demonstrated on a daily. Let's start the "Love Dare Challenge" by practicing these in our marriage.


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We like to keep things in the dark, because we don't want people to know everything about us. But the more things we hide in the dark will come out in the light for all to see. We have to bring everything to the light.


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We all have a demon of our past. Bad relationships, bad experiences, and bad marriages. We have wounds and scars that we take into our marriage. We need to be healed from our past, so we have a brighter future.


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Marriage is not about control. That's why narcissism and gaslighting has no place in the Marriage. Listen and learn how to deal with control.


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God created marriage for many reasons. Once we learn the purpose of marriage, we can start to build a strong one.


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Culture and media tells lies about marriage, that we buy into. Then it leads to a, destruction of our marriage. Here are several lies we should not buy into.


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How we see ourselves affects our relationship and marriage. We need a right perception of who we are to have a happy and strong marriage.


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Sexual connection blooms when there is trust in the marriage. Intimacy and trust go hand in hand. Listen and learn how to build trust in your marriage.


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We don't know when our spouse is going to leave this earth and its easy to take each other for granted. Time to embrace and appreciate each other.


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They say we have lost the art of conversation, we don't know how to talk to one another. Conversation is a essential ingredient to a strong and successful marriage. Here are 3 tips to help you with the art of conversation.


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We all have arguments and disagreements, but fight the badly. Learn how to fight a good a fight, to build a strong and successful marriage.


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Over time we can fall out of friendship in our marriage. Our marriage is dull and boring. Do these things to bring back the excitement in your marriage.


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If your marriage is failing, work on these areas of your life. Since marriage reveals these things. One choice will make a difference.


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Intimacy is crucial in a marriage. We need to have a sense of AWE towards our spouse to have intimacy. Learn the 3 things we need to do to have a sense of AWE in our marriage.


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How do we learn marriage? Through other people's marriages, especially our parents. We must bring this daily in our marriage in order to build a strong one.


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Do we know what strong marriage looks like? We only learn about marriage by what we saw in our parent's marriage. Listen and learn how to have a successful marriage.


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Listen to my conversation with Rabbi Dovid Cohen as we discuss two pillars of a strong marriage.


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Love is just not words we say. It's what we do in our marriage. Listen and practice these things to help you build your marriage.


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There is no perfect marriage. This is one of the biggest reasons why our marriage gets stuck in a rot. Learn how to overcome it.


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All marriages go through hard times and they can put stress on the marriage. Listen to find out how to conquer marital fatigue.


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We all have our ideas and beliefs about marriage. How accurate are they? Can we change our mindset to have a strong and successful marriage?


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Wives has a role to build her marriage and her family. Godis calling you to step it up


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Your family needs you husbands and fathers in order for it to be strong. So start doing these.


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Marriage is hard and we wonder why? Listen and find out what we need to do to build a strong marriage.


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Many of us don't know what marriage is. How do we learn marriage? How do we have a successful one. Learn in this episode what marriage is all about.


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