Recover(y) Clarity: Recent Episodes
Patrick
Navigating Twelve Step recovery as an agnostic or atheist using AA’s Big Book. It shouldn't take years and multiple attempts to succeed.
This is part two of a four-part series looking at the question, ‘what is recovery?’
In part one we looked at the question from a high level and laid out three stages common to most drug or alcohol recoveries – it begins with abstinence, moves into discovery and change, and arrives at maintenance and growth. Let’s look at abstinence a little closer.
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This is the first episode of a four-episode series looking at the question, ‘what is recovery?’
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These two steps are the shortest in the Big Book, for good reason. Either we’re committed to a new manner of living, or we aren’t. It’s not any more complicated than that.
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He’s not talking about us when he says “we.” He uses the pronoun “you” when he’s talking about us.
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But while step four will, in fact, contain some things we aren’t proud of; is that the point of the step? The amends don’t come for another five steps after step four, so is four mostly about inventorying what we did? Is it about the what?
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Unable to stop drinking and unable to keep drinking, I committed suicide. Opiates and alcohol are a deadly mix. There’s no reason I should have been found, resuscitated or still be here, but I woke up the next morning in an ICU anyway, and angry - very angry.
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There is often a difference between what the Twelve Step fellowship says versus what the Twelve Step program says. Sometimes the differences are inconsequential, but sometimes they are serious distortions and lead new members in the wrong direction. This program vs fellowship series points out some of those differences.
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There is often a difference between what the Twelve Step fellowship says versus what the Twelve Step program says. Sometimes the differences are inconsequential, but sometimes they are serious distortions of the program and lead new members in the wrong direction. This program vs fellowship series points out some of those differences.
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But is the language really a deal breaker, or is it just a sign of unmet expectation?
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Slogans are popular in Twelve Step rooms. You find then framed on the walls of clubhouses, and offered to newcomers like cotton candy. But slogans combine the hard-won wisdom of years, and these bite-sized “recovery” nuggets have little nutritional value, and are often completely misunderstood. Here are some of the ones that leave us wanting more.
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Let’s recap part one of this two-part episode before we get into the second half in detail.
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Symptoms of untreated trauma include restlessness, irritability and discontentedness, as do the effects of emotional abuse, physical abuse, and PTSD. It’s not a direct corollary - each of the above has additional symptoms that go beyond the three Silkworth mentions, but the similarity is striking in an age where addiction is more and more seen as rooted in some sort of pain.
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Which came first - the program or the fellowship?
The program came first, but some of you saw, “Which came first - the chicken or the chicken."
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Why is this important? Decisions by their very nature are statements of intent. A decision to have lunch requires me to make lunch and eat it. A decision to become a doctor requires me to sign up for college classes and learn medicine. Decisions in and of themselves accomplish nothing. They point in a direction, but they require action to achieve.
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Do the math. If about half of the original Twelve Step members were agnostic or atheist when church attendance was over 70%, how many are agnostics or atheists today when church attendance is below 47%? A lot more than half is a safe bet. Can they navigate the program of AA without God, or a “higher power”? They sure can.