Simply Self-Employed: Recent Episodes
Alex Alkema
Helping newly self-employed women develop productive routines to control overwhelm, achieve business goals and restore leisure time!
Can it be hard for you to keep all your thoughts in order sometimes? I totally get it, scatterbrain can be so frustrating and can take its toll on your productivity in and out of the office.
When you need to focus on one thing or the other throughout the day but your brain is trying to tell you all the other details of your life you have to worry about, it can be a bit of a challenge to stand up and say
"Enough we're not working on that stuff right now."
You have all this stuff on your mind and at the end of the day, you might find that you barely got anything accomplished! Ugh.
But what if you can help yourself grab back onto your focus? I’m not saying that it’s easy but we can grab back onto it and get back down to business.
Here is what I continually find helps me. First of all, sometimes the scatterbrain just has to happen for a little bit till you vent it out.
Scheduling or making sure I have everything important written in my planner does wonders for me. Have you noticed the same thing?
The other 2 things I find that can help are talking to a friend who will listen to your thoughts.
and the thing that helps me come back into the zone the most is just checking off some things on the never-ending to-do list.
If you just pick 3 or 4 of the easiest quickest things to do in that list and go to town on them odds are you will be done with them in no time.
All that energy your brain was spending worrying about those little things will probably take you half an hour max to complete each one.
And oh my gosh the relief you get when you check a few things off that list is an amazing feeling. You feel lighter even after letting go of those few simple tasks. No more worrying about them today.
Now you are one step closer to getting into the zone and you can feel a little pep in your step. Just a little something propelling you forward.
If you have never tried this in times when your brain is a madhouse of worry and thought, give it a shot and see what you come up with.
Also, I want to hear what helps you soothe your scatter brain. If you have a strategy that works for you email me so we can help each other out, it might even end up on the show.
http://simplesignificance.com
Email: alex@simplesignificance.com
https://www.facebook.com/simplesignificancecoaching
http://simplesignificance.com
Email: alex@simplesignificance.com
https://m.facebook.com/simplesignificancecoaching
Did you know there are 4 types of introverts?
Social Introvert
Thinking Introvert
Anxious Introvert
Restrained Introvert
Social introverts enjoy social interaction when they find their people and groups that are time-tested and more intimate rather than a big party scene. They aren’t the life of the party but hang out in small gatherings and one on one meetings and afterward, they feel very drained and need time alone to recuperate and reenergize.
Thinking introverts tend to be in their heads more their problem solvers and deep thinkers. They take situations in and think about them. They think about life and reflect on themselves and how they feel. After reading or watching movies they reflect on what happened. They take time to process things going on around them and within themselves and can be considered people watchers. Very authentic because of the thought they put in. Might be quieter because they are processing or hypothesizing about something.
Anxious introverts are uncomfortable in social situations and can even be unsettled when alone. They may tend to isolate themselves intentionally. They fear scrutiny and judgment from others. They worry if they have said the wrong thing or done the wrong thing and will continue to think about it even after the situation has passed. They might thrive being in the background of an event like helping to accomplish tasks or helping to set up for a party. It can be harder for anxious introverts to put themselves out there for things like dating and networking.
Restrained introverts have a tendency to hold back when in new social settings. They don’t share too much too soon. They pay attention and think before they speak. May hold back on sharing their thoughts until someone asks for it and then they let loose with what they think or know. Once restrained introverts are comfortable around you they tend to speak more openly and let go of the restraints.
https://simplesignificance.com/
Email: alex@simplesignificance.com
https://www.facebook.com/simplesignificancecoaching
Simple Significance is narrowing its niche. Stay tuned for updates on the website, Facebook Page and Podcast!
https://simplesignificance.com/
https://www.facebook.com/simplesignificancecoaching
Email: alex@simplesignificance.com
Are you floating around during the day trying to get enough done in your business just to feel like you’re barely keeping your head above water?
Over the last couple of weeks, I've been struggling to keep my anxious thoughts to a minimum.
I knew I was missing a piece to my business and my program that needed to come before the rest of the things I was accomplishing. It was like I could almost reach out and touch it but not quite.
Then I started to do a little research into the machine of my business. I gained a bit more insight to help me recognize what step I was lacking. But that still wasn’t enough. I had to know more than what I was missing to get unstuck. I had to change my way of thinking even though I didn’t recognize that at the time.
It’s funny how even when you’re a coach sometimes you still get so caught up in your head about what’s not going right and you forget to look at the thought that’s causing all the stress and anxiety.
I had a scheduled session with one of the great coaches I went through Coach Training Alliance with and at the beginning of that session I was sure I was going to create action steps for my business goals.
My takeaway from the session was just to get some clarity on what to do next. I was feeling pretty lost.
But like any good coach Karen walked me through the session and asked me questions that made me dig deep and think about what was actually going on.
What I came up with was that I wasn’t showing up fully for myself and my clients. I wasn’t totally present and it was causing stress and anxiety.
That’s a huge problem.
My thoughts were thoughts that were coming from a place of lack and scarcity not a place of abundance.
I’m sure you know what I’m talking about.
There's a shift that happens when you show up from a genuine place of faith and abundance. That was my takeaway. I got new clarity on my next step.
I wanted to start every day with an affirmation coming from a place of trust and abundance for myself and my clients.
I made an action step to write out an affirmation that day and start reading it every morning so I could start showing up from the right place.
Know what happened?
The next day I practiced reading and believing my affirmation. That believing aspect is the most important part of the practice.
That day I accomplished things that needed to get done. I had great information presented to me and I was able to craft a piece of my program that I was missing!
After weeks of worrying, I finally let myself just be and the things I needed most started coming to me in the present. What a gift!
I have also found myself more present for my clients as well. Trusting deeper into them that they are wholly capable of achieving the actions and direction they desire.
I wanted to share this with you today because if you like me slipped into a state of confusion and stress with your business it’s okay.
Breath
Trust that you have all the knowledge and resources to find your next step. Open your mind to the answers and they will come to you.
Trust that the universe is sending you all the things you need right now and open yourself up to receiving that information instead of staying stuck in your head.
You can do this!
Stay present and be well.
alex@simplesignificance.com
https://simplesignificance.com/
Do you know you need some help maybe it’s delegating tasks in your personal life to your spouse or kids so you can focus on work during your work hours?
Whatever it is if you’re a bit of a control freak like me it might be a bit easier said at first than done.
Breath
This can turn out to be one of those tricky situations where you need help but you don’t really want help. You think you want the help but you don’t want to put down those reigns.
It’s okay, you can give yourself permission to hand over the reins to tasks that are lower on the list of things you want to handle.
Sometimes you hold on so tightly to even the simplest household tasks that you hate because for some crazy reason you get it stuck in your head that if YOU don’t do it then it won’t get done or it won’t get done right.
You know what I’m talking about.
Something I’ve learned over the past couple of years is if you have someone in your house who is willing to help take household tasks off your hands so you don’t have to think and see the chores all day while you work from home, welcome it with open arms even if they are only half-open arms, to begin with.
Here’s what I mean, if someone in your house will sweep the floors so you don’t have to then let them. Even if there is still dirt in the corners when they’re done. Practice showing up from a place of gratitude instead of judgment.
Be thankful that the floor is cleaner than it was before they cleaned. It doesn’t have to be as thorough as you would do it. If they are trying to be helpful, practice showing thanks to them instead of criticism. It’s just a floor and you didn’t have to clean it.
Or if you get to pass off the dishes some days to another household member but they didn’t wash the dirty glasses on the table, try and show up from a place of gratitude that you only have 3 dirty cups by the sink instead of a whole sink full of dishes leering at you while you work.
It never hurts to ask them if they would mind sweeping the corners next time or checking the table for dirty dishes but if it doesn’t happen try to remember it’s truly not the end of the world.
Some household chores got done and you didn’t have to do them.
I promise the world will not come to a screeching halt if the chores aren’t done to your specific standards, you’re okay.
Think about how much less defensive you get when someone tells you
“Hey, thanks for doing that it means a lot that you got it done so I didn’t have to. Next time if you think about it would you mind getting in the corners too or checking the table for dirty dishes if you think about it”
vs.
“Why didn’t you do it this way or how come you couldn’t check the table first?”
You react totally differently to each of those questions, don’t you? One remark makes people feel like they are helpful and useful with room for improvement and the other makes people feel like no matter what they do it won’t be good enough.
Next time someone helps you lighten the workload try remembering to be grateful for the help even if it’s not the way you would have done it.
Gratitude helps us in our lives and it helps us show more appreciation to others and we all want to be appreciated.
Keep it simple
alex@simplesignificance.com
https://simplesignificance.com
Today we’re on the final regret of Bronnie Ware’s The Top 5 Regrets Of The Dying
Number 5 is “I wish I had let myself be happier”.
Do you see how this final regret ties the other 4 together?
Honestly, everyone just wants to be happy when it comes down to it. Why do we fight it so so much?
Bronnie says dying people wished they "lived a life true to themselves, didn't work so much, talked about their feelings, and kept in touch with friends."
It sounds like all those people have just gifted us the key to happiness. Now we have to put the key in the door and unlock it!
Isn’t that amazing? We all are searching for the balance between work and play and finding the guts, to be honest with the people around us so we can enjoy the time we have here on earth.
I think a lot of times we're all so worried about constant continual forward motion that we really do forget to stop and smell the roses. We need to move forward in our businesses and lives but we also have an opportunity to enjoy exactly where we're at in the growth and development of our lives and businesses.
All of those people are saying they wished they had worked on their personal development more so they could live more freely.
Looking at your businesses and personal lives remember to try and find your balance and joy on the teeter-totter of work AND play.
I want to thank Bronnie Ware so much for this amazing topic we have been able to talk about over the last five weeks. I know she has given me a lot to think about and hopefully, this has helped you too.
https://simplesignificance.com/
Email: alex@simplesignificance.com
We’re on week 4 of 5 talking about Bronnie Ware’s list of The Top 5 Regrets of The Dying
Regret number 4 is “I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends”.
It’s really easy to fall out of touch with people in all the hustle and bustle of life.
Sometimes friendships grow apart because you’re different now than you were when you were 12 or 24.
There are people you meet that you are drawn to. I honestly can’t speak a ton about keeping in touch with old friends because I am no longer friends with anyone, I was friends with when I was in high school.
The only thing I can say is it’s number 4 on the list of regrets for a reason and I wanted you to know it was there. Most of you out there can probably speak to this point better than I can.
If I can leave you with a new thought today it’s this.
One thing I do know is sometimes God puts people in our lives for a reason and it changes our lives. A few people have fallen into my life and to my unexpecting delight have changed it forever. Even if I don’t stay in touch as I should, whenever I think about those people it inspires me to work towards being a better version of myself because I think about traits that I admire about them, even if they don’t know it.
Sometimes short-lived friendships last a lifetime.
https://simplesignificance.com/
Email: alex@simplesignificance.com
Today we are on number 3 of Bronnie Ware’s list of The Top 5 Regrets Of The Dying.
“I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.” Is number 3
We all know how hard that can be sometimes.
My Man would probably tell you that I constantly talk about my feelings.
I wasn’t always that way though. Throughout high school and my first few years out of high school, I had this notion that people were not to be trusted and I was strong enough to keep things to myself. I didn’t need to share all the thoughts and feelings I was working through in my mind.
How wrong I was. A few years after I graduated, I started having increased anxiety and didn’t understand how to work through my thoughts or trust people. Which led to a point where I was crying a lot and talking a lot to my mom and even a therapist for a while.
Because I wasn’t letting my thoughts and worries out, I couldn’t work through my thoughts properly and prior to this, I didn’t know about mindfulness. Thanks to my younger self being a complete goofball and thinking I didn’t need to let people in actually led me to where I am today sitting here talking to you.
Mindfulness has changed my life. I recognize thoughts that are irrational and rational and can work through them so much easier now and of course, I talk to people about the things I’m thinking and feeling now.
Look at me talking to all of you out there who I have never met before.
It is extremely freeing not to be holding in feelings that led to tension and caused me to carry around a huge unnecessary weight for years. Eventually, I couldn’t carry that weight by myself anymore and you know what I found?
The people who loved and cared about me wanted to hear those feelings even if some of those feelings might hurt their feelings. They were more than happy to help me discard that weight.
My relationships and boundaries are much better now too.
Positivephyscology.com has an article called How to Express Your Emotions in a Healthy Way: 30 Practical Tips
With some tips and facts about how to help communicate healthy emotions
I thought it was a very easy and informative read.
https://positivepsychology.com/express-emotions/
At the end of the day, it’s not worth it to keep your feelings and emotions cooped up inside. It’s okay to free yourself from that weight, we’re all human.
https://simplesignificance.com/
Email: alex@simplesignificance.com
I always remember thinking to myself I don’t want to wake up one day close to the end of my life and realize I had worked it away.
Can you guess what number 2 is on Bronnie Ware's list of The Top 5 Regrets Of The Dying?
That’s right “I wish I hadn’t worked so hard”.
When I say in my introduction that I am here to help you develop productive routines to achieve business goals and restore leisure time this is exactly what I am talking about!
I have been able to look around at multiple points in my life and see people just working away but never truly stopping to enjoy time with the people around them and to do the things that they enjoy.
Working hard when it’s time to work isn’t the problem. The problem is when you forget to rest easy on your personal time after working hard.
Life is a constant balancing act.
Kids grow up fast and the years go by fast.
If we can work when we need to and set clear boundaries. We will put in the extra time now and then, only when completely necessary. That means you get the opportunity to spend precious time with your significant other, kids, family, and friends, or maybe depending on your life you get to spend a little more time by yourself, getting to know yourself.
A bucket list shouldn’t be something that only starts to get crossed off at the end. Life is a huge bucket list to be slowly crossed off over a lifetime.
So, work hard when it’s time to work, and practice letting work go of work when it’s time to relax. Spend time on things besides your business because it’s ALL important.
https://simplesignificance.com/
Email: alex@simplesignificance.com
Today we’re going to start talking about
Bronnie Ware’s book The Top 5 Regrets Of The Dying
Everything on her list are things I can see myself looking back thinking if I’m not careful too.
Life is short and precious. Over the next 5 weeks, I am going to talk about each of the regrets of the dying that Bronnie says make the top five list. I want to be upfront I found her list at https://bronnieware.com/regrets-of-the-dying/ . I have not read her book yet.
All of these things can in some way be connected to your happiness and balance in your business too.
The number one thing on Bronnies list dying people say is “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”
That’s powerful, isn’t it?
How many of us do things because we know or maybe we just think we know it’s what’s expected of us.
Are any of you out there running a business or taking training that you hate or doesn’t fulfill you because it’s what someone else wanted you to do? Maybe you thought people would look down on you if you went another way.
If any of you out there had alarm bells going off when I asked that maybe it’s time to do more self-reflection so at the end of your life you can say with 100 percent certainty that you did all you could to live a life that was true to you.
Maybe you don’t know what exactly is true to you. You just know that the life you live now isn’t. That’s great! At least you already know there is more out there for your life.
An exercise I found on entrepreneur.com’s website is How to find your passion in 5 creativity exercises.
https://www.entrepreneur.com/slideshow/299687
What could it hurt to give it a try?
Feelings might get hurt if you have to tell a loved one you are going to try a different path than they expect of you. But, you also might find people can be more understanding than you think when you show up with honesty and boundaries.
When you look back on your life do you want to be sitting there wishing you had tried to be yourself and follow your passions or do you want to be sitting there at peace with your life knowing you lived it to the fullest?
https://simplesignificance.com/
Email: alex@simplesignificance.com
Have you ever had someone ask you “What do you know?”
They may not have said it in those exact words or even straight to your face but something along those lines.
A lot of us interpret that as Negative Nancy saying you’re too young, too dumb, and/or too inexperienced in the area of work you’re in or going into.
I wanted to encourage you to see this question as another one of life’s amazingly persistent opportunities to grow.
For those of you who don’t know I’m 23 years old.
When I was in the process of going through coach training and transitioning out of the employed world I had a few people wondering and asking others what I knew about coaching and life in general.
It was and still is easy sometimes to think ya maybe they’re right, what do I know? I’m just young and dumb.
The thing is I do know a lot and you have to start somewhere.
And I was starting and am going somewhere
Looking back, I don’t think those people understood what I was learning and doing. Looking a little deeper they could have even been resentful I was jumping in when maybe there were times in their lives when they let a life-changing opportunity pass them by.
Thinking about all the Negative Nancies in that light lets me see them from a different and better angle.
Their thoughts toward me honestly probably had very little to do with me and more to do with themselves.
This way of thinking allows me to look back at them with compassion. I truly wish them well and am grateful they asked that question because it caused me to look inward and ask myself what did I know. It required me to find at least some shred of faith within myself.
I want to be clear that this episode is in no way directed toward the Negative Nancies out there, it’s for all of you out there who keep moving forward step by step with your businesses and lives even if there were times when your faith wavered or you let someone else hinder your faith.
Maybe it is good someone asked you “what do you know?” I know I am now thankful for that question and can look back on it with grace and more confidence. I am truly blessed to be where I’m at today.
Are you?
https://simplesignificance.com/
Email: alex@simplesignificance.com
Let’s talk about Goals!
In particular one goal, your biggest overarching goal this year?
My biggest goal this year is to bring in a certain dollar amount between my coaching and cleaning. This is the biggest goal for me because the dollar amount I set is just far enough out of reach that I will have to push myself out of my comfort zone in even more ways than last year.
It requires that I try lots of new and exciting things this year! This goal demands that I have smaller goals in place and even smaller tasks delegated to those goals to accomplish The Big Guy.
To break down a bit more
Bring in $________ this year
Start Podcast Research Target Market Find Similar People Create More Content * Start Networking
*Create A Plan To Take Action In Each Area
I created a worksheet to help you acknowledge your top 10 goals for this year and a worksheet to break down your top goal.
This worksheet helps you break your biggest goal down into 5 smaller mini-goals, and then break each mini-goal down into the 5 main tasks you need to do to accomplish each mini-goal. Once you’re done with those 5 mini goals if the year is not over go back and set up another 5 mini-goals to take you even closer to meeting or exceeding The Big Guy this year.
To download your free worksheets, go to https://simplesignificance.com/worsheets
Email me at: alex@simplesignificance.com
Good Luck!!!
Today I’m going to share with you what it’s been like for me being self-employed. Maybe you can relate.
When I started Simple Significance, I was oozing with excitement! I was out there to go and grab hold of my life. While it’s exciting there are many things day-to-day that bring me back down to the real world.
One of the hardest things I have had to learn is to ignore people. Sounds bad right? I know. When I say this, I mean it with as much kindness and love as possible. Tons of people want to give advice and opinions. Some even say the way I’m doing things makes no sense.
One example is creating a niche. When I was in the process of listening to my teachers and mentors, others who didn’t own a business told me it didn’t make sense to narrow my audience. They told me I should include as many people as possible.
Not true. I could turn red in the face trying to explain that even though that seems like the oblivious thing to do you need to narrow down your audience as much as possible when you’re first starting.
Everyone and I mean everyone including myself wants to feel like a VIP. We want to feel spoken to. Everyone is so unique in the way they think and the things they’re going through, it would be really hard to speak to everyone when we’re all living such unique lives.
Every single one of these people telling me I was doing it wrong was coming from a sincere place of love and support. They wanted me to succeed.
Eventually, I had to just say I see where you’re coming from, thank you, and let it go…
Another expected yet unexpected challenge was working from home. It gets lonely and can sometimes be challenging to focus on the tasks at hand.
Most I had talked to about working from home said to keep up on joining groups or meeting up with people so you don’t seclude yourself too much. They were so right. What a learning curve. I’m still learning to navigate that one!
Another experience I encounter now that I am learning to think more like a businesswoman is that while my loved ones say they support me it may not always feel like it.
Sometimes you might find that people support you following your passion and starting/growing a business. What they might not support is the way you think it needs to be run and invested in. They might not even understand or be open to understanding what it is you do.
It can be frustrating at times but also a chance to up communication skills, which is always a great opportunity.
The bottom line is it takes a lot of self-awareness to work for yourself and by yourself every day. You need to show up for yourself, it’s gonna be worth it.
It’s okay that other people don’t and won’t get it. Let that fuel your fire!
https://simplesignificance.com/
Email me at: alex@simplesignificance.com
Let’s talk about acknowledging your achievements
It can be challenging to pat yourself on the back. It’s easy to get caught up in the day-to-day and all the things there are to accomplish.
If you are anything like me there are so many times you could use a pat on the back but, you choose to downplay all you have done and scold yourself instead. Does that make you feel better? My guess is no.
Who is the person in your life that always seems to be hardest on themselves?
What do you tell them when they come to you with things they have let themselves down on? Do you tell them they are right to feel this way and should keep being a burden on their minds and hearts?
Come on, you don’t help them pity themselves, you try to pick them up. You point out all the good things they have done for others or the things they have accomplished.
Even on those days when you feel like calling quits. Don’t forget to think about how far you have come.
Today you might not be where you thought you would be by now. But I guarantee that if you’re putting effort in, you have accomplished some things.
When you have a rough day, week, or month that you didn’t accomplish everything you wanted to, remember to think about the things you did get done. You’re not a robot, plans don’t always come together exactly how you want them to.
From me to you congrats and good job. Pat yourself on the back for me!
https://simplesignificance.com/
Email me at: alex@simplesignificance.com
Most things in life are easy yet so dang hard!
Isn’t it crazy how life is both easy and hard at the same time? The same goes for your business.
Even though the concept of things are straightforward, getting your brain to accept not everything is a big deal the first time you do it is the challenging part.
Are you stuck right now? It happens to all of us if you are.
Pull out your pen and paper if you are.
What are you stuck on?
What is keeping you stuck?
Is it a fear of succeeding or looking like a fool?
Picture your life 10 years from now if you stay hung up on that thing holding you back.
How will your life look?
Will you find pride in playing it safe?
It’s not the obstacle holding you back but the way you look at the obstacle.
Now picture you climbing right over your roadblock. How are you going to address the fear around overcoming it?
You can’t say I don’t know.
What action are you going to take to get unstuck? When will you take action? Write down a date to have your action step finished.
Push yourself to get it done.
NOW picture your life 10 years from now after you overcame all the obstacles one by one even though you had a few doubts.
What does that version of your life look and feel like???
It feels pretty good to think about, right?!
Keep moving forward, give it some gas, even if you think you might get stuck in the mud.
It’s easy-ish! https://simplesignificance.com/
Email me at: alex@simplesignificance.com
Have you ever heard the saying “Man Plans and God Laughs”?
It’s an old Yiddish adage
When you hear this phrase how do you feel?
What sort of things come to mind?
Whenever I hear this phrase, it always makes me smile. I usually start thinking about it when things are taking longer than I planned or I am having expectation disappointment.
When I can feel God laughing at me all I can picture is a wise old man chuckling to himself, shaking his head with the biggest twinkle you’ve ever seen in someone’s eyes.
This is so much more than a saying. Its two things.
-
It’s permission to loosen the reigns on controlling every little detail of your life. You can rest easy because at the end of the day you can close your eyes knowing you’re not the pilot flying the plane of earthly existence.
-
It’s also a way of proving to yourself exactly how much you want something. Things never go as planned, getting to the top of the mountain will take longer and be more vertical than you initially thought, enjoy the view.
Since the road is longer than you thought, that means something really amazing that often gets overlooked.
You have an opportunity to learn way more than if the road was a short, paved walk.
Think of it like climbing a mountain versus walking through downtown. You will be so much stronger, wise and more accomplished once you reach the top of that mountain. What feelings of growth and accomplishment come from walking through downtown?
Next time you’re feeling frustrated, try to remember that you don’t control the world.
Feel the laughter and growth in the journey because the journey is really what it’s all about.
Keep climbing your mountain and don’t forget to stop and laugh along the way!
Have you ever tried to eat an elephant?
The truth is you have probably tried to eat an elephant faster than one bite at a time.
When I was just getting started with coach training, I was really overwhelmed with all the decisions and things I needed to do to get a business going.
With the help from others in my coach training course I organized the things I needed to do, learned some new information and started accomplishing tasks one by one. I found out all those little things felt really good to get done individually and as a whole.
First thing I did was research the difference between a DBA and LLC. That small task helped me start moving forward. I choose an LLC. Next, I talked to a CPA and asked lots of questions. I got my LLC. Set up, opened a business account and talked to a lawyer about my LLC and welcome packet.
Bibbidi Bobbidi Bam!!!
I had a business!
See how the small bites helped me accomplish a major goal?
When you have a big goal to achieve it can be hard to not have tunnel vision.
You get stuck on a merry-go-round of the big picture until your dizzy and feel like you might throw up.
I’m not saying the big picture isn’t super important because it is. When you overload your brain with huge daunting tasks you actually cripple yourself with inaction.
Your head is saying things like
“I don’t know how I’m going to get there.” And “It’s just too much!”
When you notice these thoughts
STOP
Breath
Take the blinders off.
It’s okay to let some light in.
An easy way to take the blinders off is to write it out.
What are your goals and when do you want to achieve them by?
Next make a checklist of things you need to or even think you might need to do to achieve your goal/s. Pick a bite you want gone first and eat it!
If you have a hard time accomplishing tasks on your own that’s where a coach comes in for some people.
Coaching helps you talk out your big goals and work through your step-by-step goals. It gives you an accountability partner. Someone who is expecting you to accomplishing the goals you set.
If your committed to moving forward, it works. Knowing that someone else knows what you plan to have done in a certain time frame keeps it on your mind. Its easy to break promises you make just to yourself but when you voice them to someone else and they expect you to follow through, you’re more aware of accomplishing those tasks.
Whether you’re good at keeping yourself accountable or you need a partner to help you stay on track, remember to break your bigger goals down into smaller bite sized tasks.
Eventually you will have eaten a whole elephant!
Let’s be honest, sometimes we all forget to give thanks.
Honestly a ton of my time is taken up with thoughts about things I don’t have or that aren’t going my way. Pretty petty right?
But sometimes when I am writing out a thought or sending out a prayer, I realize how overwhelmingly grateful I am in this moment for the life and experiences I have had in my life.
There are days when I don’t feel like I’ve gotten anywhere in my business sometimes even weeks. Those are times when I’m stuck in inaction. Recognizing the inaction in those day is sometimes easier said than done.
Do you remember all that your grateful for today?
I have an infinite number of things to be grateful for in my life. Like the fact that I am my own boss and get to make my own schedule!
I have an amazing man who supports me through this new business. I don’t even know how different and more difficult my startup would be without that amazing man. Let’s not forget the fact that I live in the greatest country in the world. The list goes on and on.
Days like today are the times in my life I appreciate most. I’m so grateful. I just forget that fact sometimes.
Psychology today even notes that gratitude can increase your mental and physical health. How amazing is that!
How thankful are you today?
And if you were to thank someone today for the support or help they have provided you within your business or life, who would it be? Why?
The people I am most thankful for today is my man Jack for all his support and on good days and bad even when my business was an idea that I was being called to explore. The other person would be my mom for always being my undying cheerleader. Thanks you two, I love you both.
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When you think about your house do you picture it as a clean place or a place of dirt and unnecessary mess?
Sometimes I can go either was depending on the month.
I have noticed when the dishes are done on a daily basis and I don’t let them stack up I generally feel in a brighter mood. It’s like “Ahhhh, I can see the counter!!!”
I never used to be in a routine of doing the dishes daily. But since I started implementing that into my routine, I have noticed changes in how I feel and in my concentration level at work.
There is an article in CEO Today Magazine talking about just that!
https://www.ceotodaymagazine.com/2019/11/5-ways-cleanliness-at-home-impacts-productivity-in-the-workplace/
The article is called 5 Ways Cleanliness At Home Impacts Productivity In The Workplace
The article says that peoples moods, spirits and productivity can falter due to an unclean work environment.
When we keep a clean home we feel better and that makes us want to keep a clean workspace so we feel great at work too!
Since my office is my home it only makes sense that the feeling transfers into my office time.
My next two household routines to put in place in this year are to consistently make the bed in the morning and keep up on washing and putting away the laundry.
Do you have any household routines that make you more productive at work??
If not, what would your top three new household routines be to kick-start your productivity at work??
If I can make these little changes, you can too!
You’ve got this!!!
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E-mail: alex@simplesignificance.com
If you had an opportunity to go back in time knowing what you know now about life and your business what would you tell teenage you?
If I got a chance to talk to my teenage self, there are two things I would tell her.
The first thing I would tell myself is to put myself out there more. That it's okay to meet new people and learn how to interact with them on a personable level without them being your friend. Now this might sound easy or straight forward to some of you but, if you are anything like me you kept a few people close and that was it.
If I would have allowed myself to relax around people, that were not my friends or acquaintances it would be so much easier today to put myself out there.
For example, I love talking one on one with someone but when it becomes 4 or more people that I’m not close with I get really uncomfortable and nervous to this day. That social butterfly quality would have helped me upfront to put my business out there and start networking right away.
The second thing I would tell teenage me is that mindfulness is a thing and that I get to choose what thoughts I take or leave.
This would have been more beneficial to me moving forward in my life because it would have allowed me to notice thoughts that were holding me back earlier on. Now I constantly call my brain out on thoughts that are not helpful or productive.
Mindfulness has and continues to change my life for the better.
Let me explain a little more.
I can’t give you an example of teenage ME's thoughts but I’ll give you an example of today ME's thought that can start out as a negative until I realize a new thought. You have probably had the same though at one time or another.
One example that comes to mind is the thought “I can’t do this.”
That is a limiting belief and by no means true.
Honestly, there are very few things humans can’t do.
Like fly, that’s one thing we can’t do.
After recognizing that thought, I have to bring myself to down to right now and think something that’s true or productive, like…
“I don’t know how to do this right now, but I can find someone or something to help me figure it out.”
That is the truth.
Do you see the difference? The first thought is just a thought that popped in, there is nothing to back it. It gives you permission to spiral downward into a dark abyss.
The second thought on the other hand is also a fact. Its realistic in expectations, allows for growth and a new way of thinking.
I’m not bringing this topic up to make you wish you could go back in time.
I brought it up to help you recognize the things that are most important to you to change. If you’re already working on that growth and change, good for you! Keep moving forward because you can do almost anything you put your mind and heart into.
If you haven’t started the journey to growing yourself but are ready to,
try this exercise to help you pinpoint the top two growth areas and the reasons for progressing in those areas.
YOU HAVE GOT THIS!!!
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Email: alex@simplesignificance.com
Hey Ladies, this episode is for those of you who didn’t pull a business loan to start up or maybe you did pull a loan but that money is already spent up.
Starting a business with no prior business experience is a lot to take on. You have to figure out whether you want to do a DBA or LLC or one of the other options out there, taxes and quarterlies, excel files and how you want to organize your funds, how to pay yourself, business cards, how to build a website and Facebook page. Don’t forget about finding clients or customers.
There is a lot to think about!
How do you handle things when money stalls your start up?
For me, I am starting to clean houses. Still for myself so I am my own boss but so I can contribute to our finances and make some money to invest into my coaching business. So, I basically started another gig to help my household and still be able to continue building a coaching business. I found a way to continue to work for myself and not have to rush my coaching business into a profit.
I’m not saying that this is the right way for you but it was the right way for me.
Something I didn’t realize getting started was if you’re not an outgoing people person to begin with that transition might take longer than you think.
Going into coaching they tell you how you can have or have to have clients before certification is completed. Which is great but something to know is if you’re not a natural at talking to strangers and your audience, others in the same field are going to surpass you at least in the beginning and that is okay. Its great actually.
You don’t have to look on others and be jealous that they are moving faster than you. You are in the perfect position to learn from them. Lots of people love helping others, especially if your niches are a little different. I learn so much from a couple awesome ladies that became certified coaches through CTA with me. We talk every week or two and even coach each other sometimes.
My point is, if you actually have the opportunity to learn from someone you know that wants to see you succeed then just ask.
The absolute worst thing they can say is no. Who knows you might have some knowledge to share with them too.
If you’re in a position where you can’t invest the money you want to into your business or you don’t have the clients or customers you thought you would by now remember slow and steady wins the race. Don’t give up. Look at this time in your life as an opportunity to perfect your business model, so once things really get moving that momentum is something you will know how to sustain.
Do what you have to do for now even if that means picking up a side job that you are good at for the time being without letting your new baby business go under.
You can learn all the stuff, it just might take some time!
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E-mail: alex@simplesignificance.com
https://www.facebook.com/simplesignificancecoaching
Are you letting imposter syndrome hold you back?
Imposter syndrome is feeling like a fake or a phony, like your not good enough to be doing or saying something. You might feel like one day someone is going to knock on your door, point there finger in your face and say I know you have no idea what you're doing or talking about and I’m going to make sure the whole world knows it!
In your nightmares it just might be your self knocking on that door.
Imposter syndrome is your brains way of trying to keep you safe from the unknown. Its saying, remember how warm and comfortable it was before all this? Let's go back there so you can live out your unfulfilling days “safely."
But let me tell you, there is a greater calling within me that is gently pushing me to be my own boss and have control of how I spend my time on this earth.
I could break away from that gentle push at any time and I have before.
But if I did I would have so many more regrets in my life
Is imposter syndrome holding you back???
When I first graduated high school I took an EMT Basic course. I did well in the class but when it came down to getting my state certification I choked up. I decided not to follow through with it.
I never had a solid excuse when people asked me why. Today I know that it was imposter syndrome holding me back.
I am currently taking a business minded course. Jody Moore teaches you to put out B- level work so you can keep moving forward.
News flash, you will never think something you do is perfect. No matter how long or hard you work on it your inner critic will always tell you there is more to be done or people won't like it and they will know its not the absolute best thing out there.
Guess what. By putting out that B- work you just might change someone’s life because you didn’t hold back and keep it to yourself.
You took a risk to help others and grow yourself.
Next time you are struggling to keep that inner critic at bay ask yourself if the work you’re putting out is your best b- level work and if it is show it to the world.
Next time you notice imposter syndrome present remind yourself that you're probably about to or are doing something outside your comfort zone that will help you grow and move forward with your life and achievements.
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Email me at: alex@simplesignificance.com
Hey ladies, how are those businesses going? I hope things are going well. If one of your first thoughts was “It's going terrible, I just keep messing up!” Revel in that thought, some of the best things in our life come from our accidental mess ups.
Shawn Achor talks about “falling up” in his book The Happiness Advantage.
He talks about the 7 principles that help you be more successful at work and in your personal life.
Principle number 4 is “falling up”
His book says when you fall, make a mistake or life happens, if you can see the path that offers growth and opportunity for forward momentum, you can achieve far more because of your pitfalls.
Did you happen to notice the intro to my very first podcast episode? In that episode I said my show was the Simple Significance Life. Sorry if I confused anyone, it's not. I forgot to change the recording before I posted it!
When I realized I freaked out a bit. Simple Significance is the name of my business but I wanted you guys to know I was talking to you, so I changed the podcast name to Simply Self-Employed. After searching for a few minutes how to fix my screw up I stopped and went wait a second, this is totally an Alex move.
I have been stressed about this podcast for 2 months and now I started it and there is a mistake in the very first episode!
That is real life my friends we make mistakes and sometimes the world gets to see them. So, I left it like that so you could see I f-ed up and it is still all okay. Moving forward I will pay extra attention when things change making sure I update EVERYTHING!
Now I have something new to add to my list of lessons learned and more to grow from.
This was a small fall but an embarrassing one nonetheless. Isn’t it refreshing to recognize and own up to a mistake, so there is no shame around it and moving forward you're clear with yourself about where you came from and the obstacles you made it through to get to where you are today?
Keep putting yourself out there, keep making mistakes because one day you’ll realize the value you found in falling. You got this!
I have already made a bunch of mistakes that have turned out to be unknow stepping stones for me in my business.
In particular this past fall I started posting videos on Facebook
Do you Know what I figured out?
I wasn’t being me. Was there some useful information in some of those videos? For sure, but… it wasn’t me. It also wasn’t coming from the right place.
Now I am ready to talk to you as the brand-new business woman I am. I do not have 20 years of experience but I do know how to coach, ask questions and be real.
So, if you’re just starting out in your business too or feeling overwhelmed with where you’re at in your business come with me lets go on this journey together. There are great thing just waiting out there for us to experience! Together we can learn the tips and tricks to being your own boss!
If there is something you want to talk about or a question you have for a future episode send me an email with a bit about your story and the question you would like discussed, for a chance to hear it on the show.
If this sounds like you don't forget to subscribe and leave a review!
E-mail me at alex@simplesignificance.com
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visit my website and Facebook page
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