Bite Your Tongue: The Podcast: Recent Episodes
Bite Your Tongue
Did you ever expect being the parent of an adult child would be so difficult? Introducing "Bite Your Tongue," a look at exploring that next chapter in parenting: building healthy relationships with adult children. From money and finance to relationships and sibling rivalry, we cover it all. Even when to bite your tongue! Join me, Denise Gorant, and my co-host Dr. Ellen Braaten, as we bring together experts, parents and even young adults to discuss this next phase of parenting. We will chat, have some fun and learn about ourselves and our kids along the way!
When an adult child moves back home once, many parents see it as temporary. But what happens when it becomes a pattern?
In this episode of Straight from the Listener Line: Real Questions, Real Answers, Denise is joined by psychotherapist Joe Nucci to answer a listener's heartfelt question about her adult son, who has returned home five different times.
Together they explore the difficult balance between offering support and fostering independence, why curiosity is more helpful than assumptions, and how parents can have honest conversations without losing compassion.
We discuss:
- Why adult children may repeatedly move back home
- The difference between helping and enabling
- Questions parents should ask before making decisions
- How curiosity can uncover the real issue
- Why temporary discomfort can sometimes lead to long-term growth
- Navigating guilt while remaining true to your parenting values
Key Takeaway
Sometimes the hardest part of parenting isn't opening the door—it's knowing when it's time to close it.
To send us your own question for a future episode:
Call our Listener Line: 719-347-1106
Email: BiteYourTonguePodcast@gmail.com
We are on SUBSTACK now too - with "Behind the Mic." We talk about how the episode resonated with us and share some inside scoop that you won't want to miss.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much. Facebook Instagram
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Website: biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Substack: Behind the Mic
Listener Line: 719-347-1106
Email: biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
And remember…
sometimes you just have to bite your tongue.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Some conversations are worth revisiting.
As we prepared to re-release this conversation with therapist Rachel Haack, I listened to it again for the first time in several years. I thought I knew exactly what Rachel was going to say. After all, I was the one asking the questions.
But that's the gift of listening again. Sometimes the conversation hasn't changed at all—you have.
This time, Rachel's insights on defensiveness, curiosity, perfection, and the evolving relationship between parents and their adult children landed in a completely different way. I found myself reflecting not only on my parenting, but on how much I've grown since we first recorded this episode.
Whether you're hearing this conversation for the first time or listening again alongside me, I hope you'll discover something new, too.
In this episode, we discuss:
- Why defensiveness is one of the biggest barriers to healthy conversations with our adult children.
- How choosing curiosity over certainty can transform difficult discussions.
- What it really means to know your adult child as the person they are today—not just the child you raised.
- Why asking, "I know I have blind spots. Would you help point them out to me?" can deepen trust and connection.
- The changing role of parents as adult children build lives, relationships, and families of their own.
- Rachel's compassionate perspective on mothers-in-law, shifting family roles, and the grief that can accompany those transitions.
- Why perfection is an impossible goal—and why embracing life's complexities leads to healthier family relationships.
The wisdom behind Rachel's grandfather's saying: "Those who know the most know to say the least."
To send us your own question for a future episode:
Call our Listener Line: 719-347-1106
Email: BiteYourTonguePodcast@gmail.com
We are on SUBSTACK now too - with "Behind the Mic." We talk about how the episode resonated with us and share some inside scoop that you won't want to miss.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much. Facebook Instagram
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Website: biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Substack: Behind the Mic
Listener Line: 719-347-1106
Email: biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
And remember…
sometimes you just have to bite your tongue.
Support the show
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
This is our first in a series of our new shorter segments called:
Straight from the Listener Line – Real Questions. Real Answers.
In this new series, we take one real listener question and bring in an expert to help us think it through honestly, thoughtfully, and with real-life experience behind it.
Today’s episode tackles a topic many grandparents quietly struggle with:
“What happens when you’re trying your best to help… but it still feels like you can’t do anything right?”
A listener shares the emotional challenge of being both a stepmom and mother-in-law while navigating the first year of a new baby’s life.
From formula instructions and changing nap schedules to feelings of criticism, boundaries, and the complicated dynamics between a daughter-in-law’s family and a son’s family, she describes what feels like a “no-win situation.”
Joining Denise is grandparent expert Kimberly Bepler, founder of GrandparentDoula.com and a returning guest from Season 5, Episode 95.
I thought I had the answer to this one. But I was real off and Kimberly was spot on.
She offers a compassionate and eye-opening perspective on what many new parents — especially first-time mothers — are experiencing beneath the surface:
• The intense pressure and vulnerability of new motherhood
• Why control can feel so important during the first year
• How social media and modern parenting expectations affect confidence
• Why grandparents often feel criticized even when they mean well
• The importance of supporting parents’ goals, even when they seem rigid or constantly changing
• How empathy, reassurance, and flexibility can strengthen family relationships
This conversation is thoughtful, practical, and deeply validating for grandparents trying to navigate changing family roles with love and grace.
If you’ve ever wondered:
• “Why does everything feel so sensitive?”
• “Why do I feel like I’m always getting it wrong?”
• “How do I stay supportive without overstepping?”
— this episode is for you.
To send us your own question for a future episode:
Call our Listener Line: 719-347-1106
Email: BiteYourTonguePodcast@gmail.com
We are on SUBSTACK now too - with "Behind the Mic." We talk about how the episode resonated with us and share some inside scoop that you won't want to miss.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much. Facebook Instagram
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Website: biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Substack: Behind the Mic
Listener Line: 719-347-1106
Email: biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
And remember…
sometimes you just have to bite your tongue.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
This week we're revisiting one of our most talked-about episodes. Clinical psychologist and bestselling author of the book Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents, Dr. Lindsay Gibson joins us discuss emotional maturity, self-awareness, and why we need to play the long game.
Many parents struggle with the feeling that they are constantly being asked to listen, validate, and accommodate their adult children while their own feelings go unheard. Dr. Gibson offers a different perspective. She argues that when the goal is preserving and strengthening a relationship, sometimes the most important thing is not proving who is right but understanding the other person's emotional experience.
In this conversation, we discuss:
- What it means to be an emotionally immature parent—and why emotional maturity exists on a continuum
- Why every parent, even the most loving parent, has moments they regret
- How stress, anxiety, and defensiveness affect our relationships with our adult children
- What to do when your adult child remembers an event very differently than you do
- Why intentions and impact are not always the same thing
- The difference between surface-level family relationships and emotionally intimate relationships
- Why validation does not mean admitting guilt or agreeing with everything your child says
- The listener question many parents ask: "Why is it always on us?"
- Dr. Gibson's perspective on estrangement and the role therapy should play in family relationships
- How parents can develop greater self-awareness and self-knowledge at any age
- Why building a healthy relationship with an adult child often requires playing "the long game"
One of the most memorable takeaways from this episode is Dr. Gibson's reminder that relationships are not courtrooms. When an adult child shares something that hurt them, focusing on understanding their experience may be more helpful than debating the facts.
Whether your relationship with your adult child is thriving, strained, or somewhere in between, this conversation offers thoughtful insights into connection, communication, and personal growth.
About Dr. Lindsay Gibson
Dr. Lindsay Gibson is a clinical psychologist and the bestselling author of Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents. Her work has helped millions of readers better understand family dynamics, emotional maturity, and the path toward healthier relationships.
To send us your own question for a future episode:
Call our Listener Line: 719-347-1106
Email: BiteYourTonguePodcast@gmail.com
We are on SUBSTACK now too - with "Behind the Mic." We talk about how the episode resonated with us and share some inside scoop that you won't want to miss.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much. Facebook Instagram
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Website: biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Substack: Behind the Mic
Listener Line: 719-347-1106
Email: biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
And remember…
sometimes you just have to bite your tongue.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
In our first short form episode -- Straight From the Listener Line episode -- we welcome back psychologist Dr. Jeffrey Bernstein to answer a heartfelt listener question.
A mother shares her struggle after watching her once-close relationship with her son change following his marriage. She feels increasingly pushed aside and wonders how to navigate the growing distance, particularly when she believes her daughter-in-law no longer values a relationship with her husband's family.
We discusses:
- Why adult children often experience divided loyalties after marriage
- The danger of "chasing" a relationship when fear and anxiety take over
- How parents can remain emotionally open without pushing too hard
- The grief that often accompanies changing family relationships
- Why love alone doesn't always tell us what to do next
This episode offers practical guidance and compassionate reassurance for parents facing difficult changes in their relationships with adult children.
Tips you can use right away.
Read more about this episode on our Substack Behind the Mic, where after each episode we share some personal thoughts and discussion. Link here to read our current one.
Have a question you'd like us to discuss?
Call the Listener Line:
📞 719-347-1106
Or email:
📧 BiteYourTonguePodcast@gmail.com
Your question could be featured in a future episode of Straight From the Listener Line: Real Questions, Real Answers.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much. Facebook Instagram
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Website: biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Substack: Behind the Mic
Listener Line: 719-347-1106
Email: biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
And remember…
sometimes you just have to bite your tongue.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
For this episode of Bite Your Tongue, we’re doing something quite a bit different.
This is the last episode of Season 7, and today it’s just me.
Me — and excerpts from one of my all-time favorite podcasts, This American Life with Ira Glass.
For those who may not know Ira’s work, he is the groundbreaking creator and host of This American Life, whose storytelling helped redefine public radio and podcasting. A recipient of the Peabody, Pulitzer, and Edward R. Murrow Awards, Ira is widely considered one of the most influential storytellers of our time.
Now, as you might guess, I would have absolutely loved to have Ira on as a guest. Sadly, that didn’t happen. But Ira did the next best thing — he very graciously gave me permission to use excerpts from his show in this episode. Honestly, I was so grateful. What a class act and what a thrill for me to connect, even briefly, with someone I admire so much.
So here’s how this all came about.
I was listening to a recent episode of This American Life called Call Your Parents, and it immediately caught my attention. As I listened, I found myself completely drawn in. In fact, when I mentioned the episode to Connie FIsher, our audio engineer, she told me she literally sat in her car until the episode finished because she was so engrossed in it.
In the episode, Ira shares recordings and conversations with his parents from when he was a young adult. While Ira never had children of his own, he has of course been an adult child — and like so many families, his relationship with his parents was loving, complicated, strained at times, and deeply human.
As I listened, I kept thinking:
Maybe this is not quite as new as we think it is.
For years on this podcast I’ve heard versions of the same questions over and over:
- Why don’t they call?
- Why don’t they visit?
- Why are relationships with adult children so hard now?
- Why does this generation seem so different?
But listening to Ira and his parents, I realized they were wrestling with many of the exact same issues decades ago.
His parents worried about his career.
He sometimes pulled away. There was judgment. Frustration. Love. Misunderstanding.
In other words, it all sounded incredibly familiar.
There are several moments in this episode that stayed with me long after I finished listening — moments that are funny, painfully honest, tender, and incredibly relatable for anyone navigating family relationships. You will love it.
And somewhere in the middle of all of it, I found myself wondering:
Are relationships between parents and adult children truly harder today? Or are we finally talking openly about struggles families have quietly carried for generations?
This finale became much more personal than I expected. It made me reflect not only on today’s struggles between parents and adult children, but on my own parents, my own choices, and the possibility that the more things change, the more they stay the same.
Next up: We are dropping some short episodes called: Straight From the Listener Line," which aims to address real questions from listeners with expert insights. This initiative emphasizes the podcast's commitment to fostering dialogue and providing support for families navigating the complexities of adult relationships.
And don't forget our phone line (719-347-1106) and email address (biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com). We will never play your message on the podcast without your approval first. Let us know what is on your mind!
We are on SUBSTACK now too - with "Behind the Mic." We talk about how the episode resonated with us and share some inside scoop that you won't want to miss.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much.
Facebook Instagram
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Website: biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Substack: Behind the Mic
Listener Line: 719-347-1106
Email: biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Weddings, Family Tension, and Modern Etiquette
Episode Description:
If there is one life event that can bring together love, joy, tradition, money, and family tension all at once, it is a wedding.
In this episode of Bite Your Tongue, Denise talks with Lizzie Post — co-president of the Emily Post Institute, co-host of the Awesome Etiquette podcast, and great-great-granddaughter of Emily Post — about how weddings have changed and why they still create so many emotional landmines for families.
Together they explore what modern etiquette really means, how parents can support their adult children without taking over, and why communication matters so much when expectations, finances, and family traditions collide.
They also tackle listener questions about guest lists, controlling money, invisible groom’s parents, wedding gifts, complicated family dynamics, and how to navigate all of it with more respect and less resentment.
A few key takeaways from Lizzie Post:
- Patience and flexibility matter more than ever
- Listen carefully before reacting
- Be honest about expectations, especially around money
- A thoughtful apology can go a long way
- Good etiquette is less about rules and more about respect, kindness, and consideration
Guest:
Lizzie Post is co-president of the Emily Post Institute, co-host of the Awesome Etiquette podcast, and author of several etiquette books, including Emily Post Etiquette and Emily Post Business Etiquette. Her upcoming book, The Emily Post Wedding Etiquette Book, will offer a completely modern look at weddings, relationships, and etiquette today.
Connect with Bite Your Tongue:
We hope all of you will call to share their stories, ideas, episodes they liked or did not like. We'd like to begin answering these questions in each episode. So give us a call now at
719-347-1106.
We are on SUBSTACK now too - with "Behind the Mic." We talk about how the episode resonated with us and share some inside scoop that you won't want to miss.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much.
Facebook Instagram
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Website: biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Substack: Behind the Mic
Listener Line: 719-347-1106
Email: biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Are you helping your adult child… or accidentally holding them back?
Many parents quietly support their adult children financially — paying rent, helping with debt, or covering emergencies. But when does helping become enabling?
In this episode, Denise talks with financial psychologist Dr. Brad Klontz about the emotional and psychological forces behind the “Bank of Mom and Dad.”
Dr. Brad tells it like it is and doesn't hold back. He's says the right things - but sometimes they are hard to hear. You decide.
Together they explore why financial dependence happens, how parents unintentionally reinforce it, and what it takes to change the pattern.
This is a tough conversation — but an important one for any parent wondering if their financial support is truly helping their child thrive.
In this episode we discuss:
- What a financial psychologist actually does
- Why money is the #1 stressor for most Americans
- The emotional drivers behind parents financially supporting adult children
- The difference between helping and enabling
- The psychology of financial dependence
- Why adult children sometimes resent the parents supporting them
- How guilt, divorce, and childhood experiences shape financial decisions
- What parents can do when an adult child refuses to become independent
- The psychological concept of an “extinction burst”
- How to create boundaries around financial help
- What to do when grandchildren complicate the situation
- Whether helping with a house down payment is a good idea
- How money can impact sibling relationships and inheritance
If you have something to add or if you have a question you'd like us to answer:
📞 Call the Bite Your Tongue listener line: 719-347-1106
You can also email us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.
We are on SUBSTACK now too - with "Behind the Mic." We talk about how the episode resonated with us and share some inside scoop that you won't want to miss.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much.
Facebook Instagram
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Family estrangement is one of the most painful and least discussed challenges parents face today.
In this deeply personal and controversial episode, Denise speaks with journalist, entrepreneur, and author Laura Wellington, known online as Doormat Mom No More. After raising five children as a widowed mother, Laura found herself unexpectedly cut off by one of her adult daughters—an experience that left her heartbroken and searching for answers.
She tried desperately to find other parents who were suffering with similar loss. But noone came forward. Then, she did what she never thought she would do - put a video about her problem on TikTok. What followed was something she never anticipated: thousands of parents reaching out with similar stories. She's been featured in so many places including The Wall Street Journal, People Magazine and The Doctor Phil TV Show.
Laura is a bright accomplished woman and her story will resonate with many. It's more than just about estrangement. It's about finding yourself.
This conversation is raw, complicated, and at times uncomfortable—but it’s one many families are quietly navigating.
Whether you’re a parent, an adult child, or someone trying to understand a fractured relationship, this episode opens the door to a conversation we’re not having nearly enough.
Check out Laura's book -- Doormat Mom, No More! When Good Parents Finally say "Enough" to Their Ungrateful Kids.
If this episode resonates with you, we want to hear your story.
📞 Call the Bite Your Tongue listener line: 719-347-1106
You can also email us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.
We are on SUBSTACK now too - with "Behind the Mic." We talk about how the episode resonated with us and share some inside scoop that you won't want to miss.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much.
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Do you lie awake at night running through every possible “what if” about your adult child?
What if they make the wrong choice?
What if they don’t land on their feet?
Should I call? Should I say something? Should I bite my tongue?
In this episode of Bite Your Tongue, Denise welcomes back psychologist and parent coach Jeffrey Bernstein, author of Freeing Your Child from Overthinking, to unpack the difference between anxiety and overthinking — and why that distinction matters so much in relationships with adult children.
What You’ll Learn:
- Why overthinking is a mental habit — not just anxiety
- How parents unintentionally fuel their adult child’s anxiety
- Why “less is more” is often the most loving response
- The danger of becoming a SWAT Team Parent
- How to support an overthinking adult child without fixing or rescuing
- The power of validation over advice
- How retirement and extra time can increase parental overthinking
The PACE Method
Dr. Bernstein introduces a simple but powerful tool:
P — Pause
A — Acknowledge
C — Contain
E — Engage
When parents regulate their own overthinking, adult children don’t have to defend against it.
Key Takeaway:
Overthinking fuels anxiety — and anxiety leaks into relationships.
But calm, collaborative parenting builds emotional safety.
Sometimes the most loving thing we can do is stop managing… and start mentoring.
If this resonated, tap follow, share with a friend who needs it, and leave a quick review—your support helps more families find their footing.
Don't forget about our listening line at 719.347.1106.
We hope all of you will call to share their stories, ideas, episodes they liked or did not like. We'd like to begin answering these questions in each episode. So give us a call now at
719-347-1106.
We are on SUBSTACK now too - with "Behind the Mic." We talk about how the episode resonated with us and share some inside scoop that you won't want to miss.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much.
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support the show
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Are you a grandparent? If so, listen to this episode.
Boundaries, burnout, and big feelings—grand parenting can be a joy and a minefield at the same time. We invited Dee Dee Moore, founder of More Than Grand, to help us navigate the messy middle: when “free” childcare starts costing a family its energy, when in-law dynamics get prickly, and when love needs the guardrails of a clear agreement to thrive.
We start with a listener story about an eager grandmother who slid from helping to shouldering everything—until resentment and health issues made the arrangement unsustainable. Dee Dee helps the listener with her question and adds lots of tips when you are deciding to help with childcare.
Then we turn to feeling shut out by a daughter-in-law. Dee Dee reframes the “gatekeeper” idea and urges us to build a direct relationship with her as a person, not just our child’s spouse. We share examples of compliments that actually land, small trust-building gestures, and how counseling can open space when everyone is stuck.
We also tackle overbuying—why today’s parents want fewer things—and offer better ways to show love, from experiences to intentional support that fits their home and values.
Underneath it all is an identity shift: moving from fixer to “privileged bystander,” present and steady without calling the shots. We discuss preventing estrangement with early expectation-setting, learning modern safety and care practices, and staying curious instead of reactive. If you’re a new or seasoned grandparent looking for clarity, scripts, and a calmer path forward, this conversation offers tools you can use today.
If this resonated, tap follow, share with a friend who needs it, and leave a quick review—your support helps more families find their footing.
Don't forget about our listening line at 719.347.1106.
We hope all of you will call to share their stories, ideas, episodes they liked or did not like. We'd like to begin answering these questions in each episode. So give us a call now at
719-347-1106.
We are on SUBSTACK now too - with "Behind the Mic." We talk about how the episode resonated with us and share some inside scoop that you won't want to miss.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much.
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support the show
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
This episode is for mothers walking on eggshells.
For daughters who feel judged.
For families who love each other deeply but don’t know how to stop hurting each other.
In this powerful episode of Bite Your Tongue, Denise Gorant speaks with Leslie Glass and her daughter Lindsey Glass about the hardest—and most hopeful—parts of the mother-daughter relationship. Co-authors of The Mother-Daughter Relationship Makeover and its companion workbook, Leslie and Lindsey share their deeply personal journey through addiction, family conflict, estrangement, and reconciliation. Together, they explore why these relationships fracture, how communication breaks down, and what real repair actually looks like.
What We Cover:
- Why mothers and daughters trigger each other so deeply
- The independence vs. control conflict baked into motherhood
- How “helpful” comments about food, weight, or appearance become landmines
- What makes a fight toxic—and what makes it repairable
- Why estrangement can feel safer than staying in conflict
- How apologies, accountability, and boundaries rebuild trust
- Practical tools for changing communication patterns
- Why healing starts with self-work—not changing the other person
Leslie and Lindsey also share practical tools from their workbook—like replacement phrases that diffuse tension, ways to identify triggers before they explode, and why doing the work separately (not together) can be the most honest starting point.
One of the most powerful ideas from this conversation is simple but uncomfortable: "You have to decide whether you want to be right—or whether you want to stay connected."
Healing doesn’t require perfection. It requires awareness, accountability, compassion—and sometimes knowing when to bite your tongue.
We’re also launching our new listener phone line. We hope all of you will call to share their stories, ideas, episodes they liked or did not like. We'd like to begin answering these questions in each episode. So give us a call now at
719-347-1106.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much.
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support the show
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
This is a controversial episode — and we want to hear from you.
📞 Bite Your Tongue Phone Line: (719) 347-1106
Call and share your thoughts, questions, or experiences.
🎁 FREE BOOK GIVEAWAY:
The first caller will receive a free copy of FCK Them Kids*. Leave your name and email.
Family estrangement has gone mainstream — from Oprah to headlines about celebrity families — and the narrative is almost always the same: parents are to blame.
But what if that story isn’t complete?
In this emotionally charged and controversial episode, Denise is joined by psychologist and author Vivian King, PhD, whose book F Them Kids challenges what she calls the one-sided narrative of the estrangement epidemic. Vivian speaks candidly about her own experience with estrangement, the role of social media and therapy culture, and why many loving, non-abusive parents are being dehumanized and silenced.
This conversation is not about dismissing adult children’s pain — it’s about expanding the dialogue, questioning cultural assumptions, and asking hard questions about accountability, boundaries, and dignity on both sides.
Whether you agree or disagree, this episode invites you to listen with curiosity, courage, and an open mind. We will talk about:
- The rise of “no contact” culture and the language of blame
- How social media and online echo chambers reinforce estrangement
- When therapy helps — and when it harms
- Why many estranged parents are not abusive or neglectful
- The emotional toll of estrangement on parents
- Should parents apologize “no matter what”?
- How to hold on to dignity, self-worth, and joy when a child cuts contact
- Why this conversation makes so many people uncomfortable — and why it matters
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much.
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support the show
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us your feedback here: biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com or give us a ring at 719-347-1106. Tell us what is on your mind.
Now on to today's episode:
What if the hardest part of parenting adult children isn’t knowing what to do—but knowing when to stop?
In this episode of Bite Your Tongue, Denise sits down with licensed therapist and author Joanna Hardis to unpack her counterintuitive but powerful philosophy: doing nothing can be one of the most supportive things a parent does.
Joanna introduces the concept of distress tolerance—our ability to sit with discomfort without reacting—and explains why parents so often over-function, over-talk, over-explain, and over-apologize when their adult children struggle. While it may feel helpful in the moment, those reactions are often driven by our own anxiety rather than our child’s actual needs.
Together, Denise and Joanna explore:
- Why parents confuse love with action—and how that backfires
- How “doing nothing” is not abandonment, but emotional regulation
- The difference between responding thoughtfully vs. reacting emotionally
- Why swooping in sends the message “I don’t trust you”
- How over-talking and people-pleasing quietly erode connection
- The shift from doing mode to being mode in parenting
- Practical, small “weight-lifting” exercises to build distress tolerance
Joanna offers concrete tools parents can start using today—beginning with something surprisingly simple: putting your phone down and sitting with discomfort.
This conversation is a must-listen for parents who love deeply, worry constantly, and want healthier, calmer relationships with their adult children—without losing themselves in the process.
Guest Resources: 🌐 JoannaHardis.com
We’re also launching our new listener phone line. We hope all of you will call to share their stories, ideas, episodes they liked or did not like. We'd like to begin answering these questions in each episode. So give us a call now at
719-347-1106.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much.
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support the show
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us your feedback here: biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com or give us a ring at 719-347-1106. Tell us what is on your mind. On to today's episode:
Happy New Year. We’re kicking off a new season with a best-of compilation of expert advice from 2025, focused on one thing: building healthier relationships with adult children. This episode brings together the most effective, field-tested tools from last season’s most impactful conversations—practical shifts in language, mindset, and boundaries that truly change the tone at home.
You’ll hear guidance on listening without fixing, navigating money and gifts, welcoming partners, easing tension through simple communication tweaks, and more.
We’re also launching our new listener phone line. We hope all of you will call to share their stories, ideas, episodes they liked or did not like. We'd like to begin answering these questions in each episode. So give us a call now at
719-347-1106.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much.
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support the show
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Ready to upgrade your relationship with your grown kids without losing yourself in the process?
We sit down with clinical psychologist and author Dr. Francine Toder author of the amazing book: "Your Kids are Grown: Parenting 2.O."
We unpack Parenting 2.0—the shift from managing to relating, from control to connection. If you’ve felt that knot in your stomach after a call, questioned whether your help is actually helpful, or wondered how to be close without being intrusive, this conversation offers a practical, hopeful roadmap.
We dive into the subtle habits that erode trust:
- talking more than half the time, offering unsolicited advice
- giving gifts with hidden strings—and how to replace them with adult-to-adult skills: empathy, permission-based feedback, and clear agreements.
Francine explains why tension can spike even after children are “launched,” how generational shifts created over-involvement, and why your body’s stress signals are a cue to pause, not push. We tackle money head-on, exploring when support fosters growth, how to set timelines and expectations, and how to recognize double messages that quietly sabotage connection.
If you’re ready to listen more, judge less, and build a relationship that feels mutual rather than parental, this episode will meet you where you are and show you the next step. Pick up Dr. Toder’s “Your Kids Are Grown: Parenting 2.0,” grab her Parenting 2.0 tip sheet, and join our community as we grow on purpose.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much.
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
We know this isn’t our usual topic about building healthy relationships with adult children—but when we met Joe Dooley, we knew we had to share his story. Even if this episode helps just one person—it’s worth it.
In honor of No Shave November, we’re taking a short detour to talk about prostate cancer—a subject that affects millions of families, often quietly. Joe, a 65-year-old living with advanced-stage prostate cancer, opens up about his journey from diagnosis to remission. He talks about what he wishes he had known, and why awareness and early testing matter so much.
Joe puts it best:
“Most men know their cholesterol level and their golf handicap, but don't know their PSA level - the key to early detection." (and "normal" is not always "normal")
Joe's story proves why understanding age-specific PSA ranges (not just "normal and "abnormal" is critical for men over 40, especially those with family history or genetic risk factors (and the BRCA Gene matters!)
This episode isn’t just about health—it’s about communication and connection. Joe shares how he’s been open and honest with his three adult sons about his diagnosis and treatment, and how those conversations brought them closer. His story reminds us that transparency and vulnerability can strengthen our relationships—especially during tough times.
And ladies—this one’s for you too. As Joe says, partners and family members can make a real difference by encouraging the men in their lives to get tested and talk about their health.
At the start of the episode, Joe shares a powerful quote that now sits proudly on my desktop. You’ll have to tune in to hear it—but I promise, you’ll love Joe and his story as much as we do.
(note: Joe is not a doctor - this is a personal story from his experience and what he has learned.)
Links: Joe Dooley The Full Story
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Email us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com with ideas/feedback.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
The holidays are upon us. It's time to dig deep.
Catherine Hickem, founder of Parenting Adult Children Today (PACT). Catherine shares a hopeful, practical roadmap for parents who want less tension and more trust—especially as the holidays bring everyone under one roof.
We dig into why adult children often act different around their parents and how expectations, tone, and boundaries can either smother or strengthen the relationship. We discuss:
• the hidden cost of parental expectations on adult children
• why rescues undermine confidence and fuel estrangement
• shifting from advice to curiosity with practical scripts
• separating our self-worth from kids’ choices
• tone of voice as an anxiety dial in hard talks
• setting and holding fair house rules when kids move home
• preparing for holidays with boundaries, space and new traditions
• grieving lost visions so joy can return
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much.
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Check out Catherine’s free resource: Seven Keys To Talking With Your Adult Children at leaderpass.com/parenting-adult-children-today/preview
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
We sit down with "therapist to the millennials" Tess Brigham to unpack why the 20s feel overwhelming, how parents can ease anxiety without enabling, and what healthy support looks like in a world of constant comparison and blurred work boundaries.
We also share a step‑by‑step plan for tapering financial help and end with three clear takeaways to guide tough conversations.
• why questions beat lectures when adult kids call in crisis
• social media’s role in comparison, urgency and the “by 30” myth
• money stress, pandemic shifts and the gig economy
• boundaries at work, after‑hours expectations and burnout
• individuation, values and reworking family narratives
• mother‑daughter friction and being seen without defensiveness
• tapering financial support with timelines and transparency
• three takeaways: coach, contextualise, accept
Huge thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Email us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com with ideas/feedback.
Please follow us on social media now. It helps us so much.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Please follow us on social media - FACEBOOK and INSTAGRAM -- we are building our brand and need your support!
On to today's episode:
The first hug goes to your adult child. That simple shift sets the tone for everything that follows—and it’s the heartbeat of our conversation with Donne Davis, founder of the Gaga Sisterhood, who’s spent two decades helping grandparents build steady, loving connections without overstepping. We dive into the messy, modern realities of grand-parenting—new parenting norms, gift-giving traps, long-distance heartache, and the quiet art of biting your tongue—while keeping one mission clear: protect the bond with the parents so your relationship with the grandkids can thrive.
We unpack why curiosity beats advice, offering word‑for‑word scripts that help you stay close without taking control. From the “anthropologist mindset” for approaching different sleep and feeding choices to setting gentle house rules in your own home, Donne shows how specific praise, reflective listening, and calm boundaries earn trust. We also explore the maternal vs. paternal grandparent dynamic, how to handle in‑law tensions, and why sustainable gifting and secondhand finds can align beautifully with younger parents’ values.
Donne shares her L‑O‑V‑E framework and book - When Grand-parenting Isn't So Grand.
If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a fellow grandparent, and leave a quick review—your support helps us bring on more experts and stories you care about.
Share your feedback about the episode by emailing us at biteyourtongue@gmail.com.
Visit biteyourtonguepodcast.com.
Thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
What if the words you use to show love are the very ones your adult child hears as judgment? That tension—care that lands as critique—drives so many family conflicts, and Deborah Tannen gives us the language map to change it.
We sit down with the Georgetown linguist and bestselling author to explore conversational style, meta-messages, and the subtle ways timing, tone, and turn‑taking shape intimacy at home.
Tannen shares vivid stories—from “Do you like your hair that long?” to car‑ride silences—that reveal how message and meta‑message diverge, why “helpful” advice stings, and how indirect questions can be invitations to co‑decide rather than games to decode. We trace the fault lines of gendered talk, where solutions collide with “troubles talk,” and show practical scripts to ask consent before giving feedback, translate intent across styles, and keep curiosity alive without sounding intrusive.
We also dig into complementary schismogenesis—the spiral where differences push each other to extremes—and how to stop the chase/withdraw dance by adjusting cadence and expectations. Birth order roles resurface in adulthood, turning firstborn competence into control and younger resistance into reflex; naming those roles loosens their grip. Tannen’s take on apologies is both moving and actionable: why impact matters more than defense, how a simple acknowledgment can heal years of hurt, and why late‑life apologies carry disproportionate power. Along the way we address the “big three” hot zones—hair, clothes, weight—plus social media’s sting of exclusion, and we offer boundary phrases that preserve both bond and autonomy.
If you’ve ever thought, “I was just caring,” while someone heard, “You’re not enough,” this conversation offers clear tools to bridge the gap. Listen, share with your family, and try one shift this week: ask before advising, label your intent, or offer a four‑part apology.
This conversation is filled with insights that can help you strengthen your most important relationships. You may also enjoy thisYoutube videoof a talk Dr. Tannen gave in Amsterdam highlighting the conversational differences between men and women. We found it fascinating.
🎧 Listen now and join us in exploring the power of language, connection, and understanding.
Share your feedback about the episode by emailing us at biteyourtongue@gmail.com.
Follow us on social media and visit biteyourtonguepodcast.com.
Thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Relationship and Friendship expert Shasta Nelson shares powerful insights on transforming parent-adult child relationships and building meaningful connections throughout life.
Emphasizing her Friendship Triangle framework of positivity, consistency, and vulnerability.
-
The Triangle of Healthy Relationships : Shasta introduces a powerful framework for understanding relationships, which consists of three essential components: positivity, consistency, and vulnerability. To foster a strong connection with our adult children, we need to ensure that our interactions are filled with positive emotions, that we spend consistent time together, and that we allow ourselves to be vulnerable. This triangle is not just applicable to parent-child relationships but can also enhance our friendships and other connections in life.
-
The Importance of Vulnerability : One of the most profound insights from our conversation is the idea that vulnerability is a gift we can give to our children. By opening up about our own experiences, regrets, and feelings, we create a safe space for them to share their own thoughts and emotions. Shasta emphasizes that it’s crucial for parents to ask their adult children about their childhood experiences and to listen without being defensive. This kind of openness can lead to healing and a deeper understanding of each other.
-
Building Our Own Support Systems : As parents, it’s easy to become overly focused on our relationships with our children, sometimes to the detriment of our own well-being. Shasta reminds us that cultivating our friendships is essential for our happiness and health. By prioritizing our own social connections, we not only enrich our lives but also become better equipped to support our children. After all, a fulfilled parent can foster a more positive and nurturing environment for their kids.
I truly believe that this episode is a must-listen for anyone navigating the challenges of parenting adult children or looking to strengthen their friendships. Join us as we explore these themes and more! 🎧💖
Follow us on social media and visit biteyourtonguepodcast.com. Email us at biteyourtongue@gmail.com.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Have you ever sent an impulsive text when feeling rejected by your adult child? That desperate "What did I do wrong?" message that you later regretted? You're not alone. The relationship between parents and their adult children exists on a delicate continuum—from deep connection to painful estrangement and everything in between.
Dr. Rachel Glik, relationship specialist and author of "A Soulful Marriage," joins us to unpack the complex dynamics of parent-adult child relationships. With remarkable insight, she reveals how our own emotional needs can unknowingly sabotage these precious connections. "We can't be a parent when we're depending on our child," she explains, highlighting how our generation's child-centered parenting style paradoxically created more self-centered adults.
The conversation delves into practical wisdom about building emotional maturity—that essential capacity to hold your own pain while simultaneously creating space for your child's perspective. Dr. Glik shares illuminating examples from her own experience as a mother and grandmother, demonstrating how to navigate differences without becoming emotionally reactive. She offers specific guidance on welcoming your child's partner, setting healthy boundaries, and finding the balance between independence and connection.
Perhaps most powerfully, Dr. Glik reframes relationship challenges as opportunities for profound personal growth. "Put energy into seeing what you're experiencing as happening for you, not to you," she advises. This shift in perspective transforms painful interactions into gateways for self-awareness and healing. Whether you're feeling distant from your adult children or simply want to strengthen your connection, this conversation provides compassionate, practical tools for moving forward with both wisdom and love.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
This is one funny episode.
Today we interview Susan Engel, a professor of psychology at Williams College and the author of the New York Times Article: When They're Grown, The Real Pain Begins.
Joining Denise as co-host is a dear friend Val Haller. Val is the mother of four boys, very similar to the ages of Susan's boys when she wrote this article, so she is our perfect co-host.
Susan takes us through her journey when she wrote the article in 2012 and her three boys were 28, 25 and 19. Today, ten years later, she is a grandmother with two of these three boys married and living right next door. Can you imagine?Some things we talk about:
- Reconceptualizing the parent-adult child relationship as a relationship rather than a job that can be perfected
- The value of passing on positive comments between family members while avoiding sharing criticisms
- Finding comfort in knowing your adult children continue to grow, develop resilience, and build support networks beyond you
- The importance of humility and acknowledging your own parenting mistakes
Recognizing when to simply listen rather than trying to fix your adult child's problems
About Val Haller - our co-host:
Val lives in Chicago and is passionate about music. She is the founder/CEO of the music website Valslist.com. She launched it about 10 years ago (when her nest was empty) and it is the first music site specifically created to help busy adults keep up with new music. Check it out.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send all ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com. Remeber to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. Support US! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Growing up doesn't end at 18—it's just beginning. Dr. Sara Klein, Vice President for Student Affairs at Stevens Institute of Technology, delivers a powerful message about the college transition that resonates far beyond freshman year: parents need to back off.
After decades of helicopter parenting from preschool through high school, many parents struggle to step back when their children enter college. We've become accustomed to tracking every aspect of our children's lives—from daily school reports to real-time location apps. But this well-intentioned involvement can sabotage the very independence our adult children need to develop.
Dr. Klein shares several specific strategies for parents navigating this transition. She recommends avoiding campus visits during the critical first six weeks, allowing students to manage homesickness and roommate conflicts themselves, and establishing clear communication boundaries instead of expecting constant contact. When students call upset, parents should listen without immediately solving problems—empowering young adults to develop their own solutions.
What makes this conversation so valuable is how these principles extend beyond college. Whether your child is 18 or 38, the fundamental challenge remains the same: how do we support without suffocating? How do we love without controlling? As Dr. Klein eloquently puts it, "Allow your child to grow into the adult that you want them to be... the way that you love them as an adult is different."
The most profound gift we can give our adult children isn't solving their problems or protecting them from discomfort—it's believing in their capacity to navigate life's challenges independently while remaining a steady, supportive presence in their lives. Ready to transform your relationship with your adult child? Start by biting your tongue and taking a step back.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send all ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com. Remeber to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. Support US! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Dr. Lawrence Steinberg sheds light on the evolving relationship between parents and their adult children in today's challenging economic landscape, offering practical advice on when to speak up and when to bite your tongue. He explains how the elongation of adolescence and unprecedented financial pressures have transformed traditional parent-child dynamics.
• Housing costs have risen five times faster than salaries, creating barriers to independence for young adults
• Living with parents is now the most common arrangement for Americans in their 20s
• Financial support creates complex dynamics about expectations and boundaries
• Follow the "40-70 rule": discuss finances before parents turn 70 or children turn 40
• Only offer unsolicited advice when your child faces potentially irreparable harmful consequences
• Frame concerns as questions rather than directives to preserve your child's autonomy
• Adult children experience a "third autonomy crisis" around age 30
• When grandparenting, recognize that parenting advice changes generationally
• Focus on making your adult children feel confident and competent as parents
• Stop judging your child's progress by the timetable you followed at their age
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee and support our work!
Support the show
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Emotional maturity transforms our relationships with adult children, but what exactly does it look like in practice? In this powerful conversation with Dr. Lindsay Gibson, clinical psychologist and author of The New York Times bestseller "Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents," we discover that emotional maturity exists on a continuum that shifts with our stress levels and resources.
When our adult children challenge our memories or share perspectives that differ from our own, our defensive instincts kick in automatically. But Dr. Gibson offers a revolutionary approach: temporarily set aside your need to be right and focus instead on understanding their emotional experience. This shift from "courtroom thinking" to empathetic listening creates space for authentic connection.
We're experiencing a profound cultural transition from what Gibson calls the "family age," where identity came from roles and external markers, to the "self-awareness age," characterized by greater psychological understanding and individual consciousness. This explains why so many parents feel caught between outdated expectations and new relationship dynamics with their adult children.
The most transformative insight? The very phrase "adult children" contains problematic contradictions. "My child" suggests ownership over another autonomous human being while failing to acknowledge their full adulthood. Instead, Gibson suggests approaching our adult children more like valued friends whose company we enjoy and whose autonomy we respect.
Self-awareness (recognizing our thoughts and feelings in the moment) and self-knowledge (understanding the patterns behind our reactions) form the foundation of emotional maturity. Together, they allow us to separate our defensive responses from our deeper desire for connection. When an adult child sets a boundary that feels hurtful, these skills help us recognize our feelings without reacting impulsively.
Have you noticed shifts in your relationship with your adult children? Share your experiences and continue the conversation by following us on social media or visiting biteyourtonguepodcast.com. The journey toward more authentic family connections starts with understanding ourselves.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee and support our work!
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Pride Month gives us the perfect opportunity to expand our understanding of the LGBTQIA+ community, especially for those of us navigating relationships with our adult children. This heartfelt conversation with Emmy-nominated Matthew Rodriguez, host and executive producer of "It's Okay to Ask Questions," offers exactly what many parents need—permission to learn without judgment.
Rodriguez creates a safe space for curiosity, admitting that even as a gay man himself, he once struggled to understand terms like "non-binary" or aspects of transgender experience. "Just because I'm gay and we're kind of on the same side of the street didn't mean I knew everything there was to know," he explains. This honest acknowledgment sets the tone for a conversation where no question feels too basic or inappropriate when asked with genuine care.
Rodriguez elaborates on how society builds these metaphorical closets brick by brick through subtle messaging about acceptable behaviors and interests until a child "can't see out of all the things they've been told they shouldn't be."
For parents whose adult child has just come out, Rodriguez offers compassionate advice: "If you need to and you can't say anything in the moment, I would hug your child, kiss them, say I love you and say I just need a moment to process this...because I want to say the right things to you."
Rodriguez's reminds us to reminder to "dream wider" for our children beyond traditional expectations. "All the ways you can grow and be in this world—there are many, and being open to that, as long as it brings love and joy and no harm, why not?"
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Sally Harris shares her emotional journey through a decade of estrangement with her adult daughter, revealing how she transformed her pain into a mission to help other parents facing similar struggles.
• Sally became an alcoholic and extremely unhealthy while her daughter's life was spiraling
• After eight years of sobriety, she's now reconciled with her daughter who returned to the family four years ago
• Sally believes "we are best positioned to serve the person we once were"
• Many therapists advise adult children to cut off family rather than work toward reconciliation
• Parents should honor their adult child's perception of events even when they disagree
• When values differ, loving your child where they are creates space for potential reconciliation
• Ask "do you want me to just listen or do you want my advice?" before offering guidance
• Self-care isn't selfish but essential for maintaining healthy relationships with adult children
• Take care of yourself first and "stay in your own lane" by focusing on what you can control
• Remember that many phases adult children go through are temporary as they establish their identity
Visit sally-harris.com to connect with her resources or find her YouTube channel with helpful videos for parents navigating relationships with adult children.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Dr. Charles Fay, CEO of Love and Logic, delivers a masterclass in parenting adult children with the perfect balance of love and accountability. Drawing from decades of experience and his family legacy in developing the Love and Logic approach, Dr. Fay shares transformative strategies that shift our focus from control to influence.
At the heart of his message lies a powerful truth: "We can never consistently work harder on somebody else's life than they are." This principle challenges us to examine our enabling behaviors masked as care and instead embrace practices that foster true independence. Through relatable scenarios—like the adult child who needs $17,000 for a truck payment or returns home to play video games on the couch—Dr. Fay demonstrates his practical five-step approach that maintains connection while respecting autonomy.
The approach begins with genuine empathy, followed by the crucial question: "What do you think you're going to do?" This simple query hands responsibility back to adult children while communicating your belief in their capability.
When establishing boundaries with adult children living at home, Dr. Fay suggests focusing on two fundamentals: ensuring their situation doesn't interfere with their growth, and making sure their presence remains enjoyable for everyone. These boundaries, communicated with empathy and firmness, create the conditions for mutual respect and continued development.
Dr. Fay offers this memorable wisdom: "The more words I use when things are going wrong, the less effective I become."
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
This was our very first Mother''s Day episode. I interview my two favorite moms -- Doria and Sharon, two mothers of adult daughters and now both have several grandchildren. I watch as they continue to share with their grandchildren their magical parenting skills.
They share with us their wisdom on creating joyful, respectful relationships with grown children in this special Mother's Day episode. Their insights reveal how bringing a spirit of fun, maintaining connections across distances, and knowing when to offer advice (and when to bite your tongue) creates lasting bonds that evolve beautifully over time.
• Creating fun, joyful experiences forms lasting connections that continue into adulthood
• Modern technology like WhatsApp enables daily connection even with children living far away
• The best conversations focus on daily life details rather than major decisions or judgment
• Offering opinions rather than judgments by asking "What do you think?" after sharing your perspective
• Shifting from leader to supporter as children become adults requires patience and trust
• Wedding planning requires openness, support, and recognition that it's their special day
• Grandparenting brings immense joy while requiring respect for the new parents' choices
• The most important message to consistently convey is unconditional love and acceptance
• Our hearts remain our children's home no matter where we all physically live
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee and support our work!
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
In today's episode, Dr. Gene Beresin, Executive Director of the Clay Center for Young and Healthy Minds, explores the complexities of adult children returning home and maintaining healthy relationships during life transitions. Based on four decades of experience with youth and young adults plus his personal journey as a father of four whose adult children all boomeranged at some point, he offers practical wisdom for navigating these delicate family dynamics.
Drawing on revolutionary brain science, Dr. Beresin challenges our traditional understanding of development, revealing that neurobiologically, adolescence doesn't end at 18—but continues until age 26. This critical insight reshapes how we approach relationships with young adults who are still developing the neural connections between emotional impulses and rational decision-making.
For parents navigating the return of an adult child, transparency becomes essential. Conversations about finances—typically avoided in most families—need prioritization alongside discussions about household expectations, timelines, and mutual support. "The rare family that speaks openly about money," Dr. Beresin notes, "is better equipped to navigate these transitions without resentment building." The key lies in balancing empathy for the challenges young adults face with appropriate boundaries that foster continued growth.
He also reminds us of what he calls the "oxygen mask principle"—the essential reminder that both parents and adult children must attend to their own emotional regulation and self-care before attempting to help each other. When both generations put on their metaphorical oxygen masks first, they create the foundation for authentic communication, mutual respect, and relationships that continue evolving through life's inevitable transitions.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send all ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com. Remeber to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. Support US! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Today we rewind and delve into the much overlooked topic of sibling relationships. We speak with Fern Schumer Chapman author of the book Brothers, Sisters, Strangers. Siblings are the longest relationship we will have in our lives - and our children's.
Whether you're navigating your own sibling estrangement or watching it develop between your children, this conversation offers both validation and practical wisdom for one of life's most painful but least discussed family challenges. It also makes you question: "Do you have a favorite child?"
Chapman shares her personal life story that led her to write this book and highlights a number of key points:
• Sibling relationships can last 80 years, making them our longest connections
• Estrangement often occurs during "perilous moments" like marriage, having children, or parental illness
• Parental favoritism significantly contributes to sibling rifts
• The "dignity model" approach to reconciliation requires genuine listening without challenging each other's stories
• Some relationships are too toxic to repair, especially with narcissism or mental illness involved
• Birth order affects sibling dynamics and relationships
• Estrangement ripples through families as relatives often align with one sibling
• Strong sibling connections are cornerstone of emotional health, according to Harvard's longest study of well-being
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee and support our work!
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
We are doing an episode rewind today on our most downloaded episode - Mothers and Daughters. This relationship carries a unique intensity that often follows us well into adulthood. When does healthy involvement cross into control? How do we navigate the painful territory when our adult daughters push us away?
Certified life coach and mother/daughter expert Pam Tronson joins us to unravel the complicated dynamics of mother-daughter relationships with refreshing honesty. Drawing from her professional expertise and personal struggles with her own adult daughters, Pam gets straight to the heart of what makes these relationships simultaneously precious and challenging.
"We were expected to be in control," Pam explains, pinpointing why the transition to parenting adults feels so disorienting. "That was part of our job description." The expectation to curate, orchestrate, and manage gradually gives way to a new reality – watching from the sidelines as our children build independent lives. This transition feels like "jumping off a bridge" for many mothers who've built their identities around active parenting.
Most powerfully, Pam encourages mothers to take responsibility without shame: "When you own the problems, you have the power to do something about them." Her advice to ask better questions like "what else could be true?" offers a path away from defensiveness toward genuine connection.
Whether you're navigating a challenging relationship with your adult daughter or working to improve communication as an adult daughter yourself, this episode provides compassionate guidance for the journey. Subscribe and share your experiences with us – when was the last time you had to bite your tongue?
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send all ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com. Remeber to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. Support US! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
This is one of our most popular episodes. Join us for an insightful exploration of the evolving dynamics in parent-child relationships and the often-misunderstood in-law dynamics in our latest podcast episode featuring Rachel Haack. Rachel, a seasoned mental health clinician and mother of five, shares her wealth of knowledge on fostering healthy relationships within family systems.
We delve into the complexities that arise when adult children forge their own paths, and how parents often grapple with the shifts in their roles. Rachel draws from her personal journey as a mother and daughter-in-law, giving listeners practical advice on how to navigate potentially rocky waters.
Key themes include the importance of establishing relationships with in-laws that are grounded in empathy, understanding expectations, and being open to engaging in difficult conversations. We tackle the notion of ambivalence in relationships—a concept often overlooked—and the necessity of nurturing compassion amidst the chaos of family life.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee and support our work!
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
This episode is a "must listen" for an parent of an adult child on the brink of welcoming a grandchild.
We are thrilled to bring you a special episode with the wise and compassionate Kimberly Beppler, The Grandparent Doula.
Kimberly enlightens us with her journey from assisting postpartum families to recognizing the irreplaceable role grandparents can play in this delicate phase. We uncover her innovative approach of crafting a "menu" of support options, ensuring grandparents provide meaningful help without stepping on toes.
It's an episode of advice for those eager to strengthen family bonds while honoring the autonomy and boundaries of new parents.
Our conversation shifts to the fresh landscape of parenting and grandparenting, where emotional intelligence reigns supreme among millennials and Gen Z. This era demands a recalibration of old norms, as we explore the evolving expectations and challenges grandparents face today. Kimberly's insights highlight the delicate balance of offering support while respecting the independence and parenting styles of our children. Together, we navigate the fine line between being a source of wisdom and avoiding the imposition of outdated solutions, all while championing patience and empathy.
We also tackle the modern pressures surrounding parenting, with a focus on breastfeeding and the overwhelming sea of information new parents encounter. Balancing personal needs with familial responsibilities also takes center stage, as we share strategies for maintaining emotional and physical well-being, ensuring grandparents remain a vibrant and nurturing presence in the lives of their families.
A special call out to a product we love: Curiocity Travel Guides. The greatest tool of discovery and keepsake for traveling with kiddos. Listen for more on today's episode.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send all ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com. Remeber to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. Support US! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
🌟 A listener wrote to us about Tina Gilbertson, the guest in today's episode. She told us that Tina "saved her life." The pain and guilt that parents go through when estranged from their adult children is unimaginable.
We asked Tina what really is estrangement? Is it a troubled relationship? Is it silence? "No, she said: "It could also be you talk every day. But maybe there's a constant tension, or you're always getting into little conflicts, and sometimes you go apart and have to be apart for a while, and then you come back together." This episode is about building a stronger and less stressful relationship with your adult children And we all need that!
We talk about:
- Understanding the relationship between self-perception and parent-child connection
- Defining estrangement and its various forms
• The importance of addressing emotional distances and insecurities
• Steps to take when facing estrangement: pause, reflect, research, and reach out - Effective methods for navigating difficult conversations
- Resources and support available through the Reconnection Club
- The ongoing journey of healing and self-improvement in parent-child dynamics
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send all ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com. Remeber to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. Support US! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
This is a very special episode for a couple of reasons. First, we’re thrilled to finally interview Dr. Ellen Braaten, the podcast's original co-host, about her incredible book, Bright Kids Who Couldn’t Care Less. It’s a great conversation.
Second keep listening to find out big news about the podcast
But the conversation today is about rekindling your child’s motivation, and the tools she shares work wonders for any age group.
As parents of adult children, many of us wonder if our kids are truly living up to their potential—or if we’re just looking at it through our own expectations. That’s the heart of today’s conversation.
Here are some highlights of today's episode:
🌟 "Parenting isn't over." Braaten reminds us that our role as parents continues even as our kids grow up. Braaten shares invaluable insights on understanding our kids' unique strengths and how to support them in finding their passions.
🤔 Are you worried about your adult child's lack of motivation? We discuss signs to look for and how to approach these sensitive conversations.
💬 "Life is a puzzle, and we put pieces in the puzzle." Discover how to help your kids find their passion and purpose.
🤔 Are you worried about your adult child’s lack of motivation? Braaten discusses the signs to look for and when to seek professional help. It's crucial to recognize the difference between typical struggles and deeper issues that may need attention.
🎓 College isn't the only path! Braaten encourages parents to embrace diverse career choices and to support their kids in exploring what truly brings them joy, whether that's a trade, a creative pursuit, or something else entirely.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send all ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com. Remeber to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. Support US! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Today we speak with Karen Denison Clark as she courageously recounts her journey from being a young tennis star victimized by her coach, to becoming a fearless advocate against sexual abuse.
Her narrative, shared through powerful media outlets, including The New York Times, serves not only as a beacon of hope for survivors but also as a call to action for creating environments where victims feel safe to voice their experiences.
By establishing a foundation of trust and openness, parents can create a safe space for their children to express their feelings and experiences, should they choose to do so. Highlights:
- Why it is not too late to talk to your adult children now
- The impact of repressed memories and the journey to recovery
- Encouraging open communication about uncomfortable topics
- Tips for parents on initiating conversations with adult children
- Advocating for awareness and change regarding sexual abuse policies
- The importance of believing survivors and nurturing their voices
- Fostering a supportive environment for future generations
- The surprising rules at Colleges and Universities that still allow relationships between coaches, professors and other people in positions of leadership with students. Read Karen's OP-ED here.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send your ideas for episodes and guests to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com. Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Are you missing the signs? Do you really know how your adult child feels and are you ready to begin to mend a fractured relationship? In this episode, we sit down with Sally Harris, to explore the nuances of maintaining strong, healthy relationships with adult children. From navigating differing values to addressing estrangement, Sally shares practical advice and strategies for parents striving to build deeper connections while respecting boundaries.
Here are some of the things we discuss:
- Recognizing the Parent-Child Dynamic
- Prioritizing Self-Care
- Mastering Effective Communication
- Offering Support Without Judgment
- Embracing Differing Values
- Focusing on Your Role
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send your ideas for episodes and guests to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee and support our work!
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
In this episode, we explore the joys and challenges of visits with adult children, whether during the holidays or throughout the year. Our guests, Pamela Heckelman, a certified Empty Nest coach, and Rabbi Schlomo Slotkin a seasoned relationship counselor, share their expertise on building stronger, more fulfilling connections with adult children.
How can parents create a welcoming home environment while prioritizing their own emotional well-being? They offer invaluable tips on balancing self-care with the temporary chaos of family gatherings. We discuss the surprising reappearance of teenage behaviors and provide strategies for handling these moments with grace and patience.
As the family gathering time approaches, managing expectations is more critical than ever. We delve into the art of flexibility, open communication, and adapting traditions to reduce stress and foster joy. Together, we explore how parents can find fulfillment in simple, meaningful moments while letting go of unnecessary pressures to truly enjoy the holiday spirit.
We talk about the importance of respecting adult children’s autonomy and maintaining a united front with your partner. By setting healthy boundaries and practicing non-judgmental communication, parents can nurture relationships that thrive beyond holiday visits.
Join us for this insightful conversation, packed with practical tools to enrich your family gatherings and strengthen relationships with your adult children.
Also a free book download from Pamela: Your Kids are Grown: Now What?
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee and support our work!
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Today we discuss the circle of life and explore the emotional and delicate balance of caregiving. For most of us we will be caregivers to our spouse, parents or even our children. And at some point, our own children will be our caregivers. We are lucky to have two guests. The first is Dana Eble, who has been involved in Alzheimer’s disease philanthropy for more than a decade, which led her to being one of the first employees at Alzheimer’s Caregivers Network in 2021. Dana works to educate and equip caregivers with the knowledge and resources they need to excel in their roles while avoiding burnout.
Joining Dana is Jessica Smith. Dana shares her own story of her mother being diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease the age of 61. She remembers wanting to hide. She felt shame and fear as her family’s world and daily realities changed.
You'll discover how mindfulness became Jessica's anchor in managing her responsibilities and learn about the essential resource, "Navigating Alzheimer's Disease: A Map for Caregivers," available as a free PDF for anyone on a similar path.
We dive into the tough conversations that many of us avoid, yet are necessary when dealing with dementia—like preparing for end-of-life discussions and challenging the often grim societal perceptions around the disease.
Thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for only $5.
Support the show
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Prepare to gain invaluable insights into the intricate dynamics of family relationships as we chat with Rachel Haack, a seasoned mental health clinician, mother, and daughter-in-law. We discuss everything from daughter-in-law issues, being a good mother-in-law, grandparent and we even have a poll our guest is going to share about what bugs young adults the most about us - and vise-versa!
Rachel opens up about her early conflicts with her mother-in-law, offering vital lessons on empathy, understanding different perspectives, and the power of effective communication in mending strained family ties.
We also discuss the high expectations often placed on mothers and the need for them to adapt as their children grow into independent adults. Rachel’s journey provides a blueprint for navigating and healing complex familial relationships, even when they start off on the wrong foot.
We explore grand parenting and identify common pitfalls such as criticism, discipline, and favoritism, emphasizing the importance of offering advice only when asked and keeping a balanced perspective on grandchildren’s strengths.
Rachel shares strategies for initiating open dialogues and handling silent treatment, as well as the importance of self-soothing and emotional regulation. We examine the balance parents need to strike between maintaining their sense of self while being open to feedback from their children. This episode is packed with practical advice on addressing past conflicts, avoiding common communication pitfalls like stonewalling and passive aggressiveness, and nurturing healthier parent-child relationships in an age where social media influences are ever-present.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference.
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
How do we transform our parenting roles as our children become young adults?
Today we speak with Julie Lythcott-Hames, former Stanford University dean and bestselling author of "How to Raise an Adult" and "Your Turn." Joined by guest co-host Erica Gardner-Gray, we unravel the complexities of modern parenting, addressing societal pressures and the myth of effortless achievement.
As a parent herself, Lythcott-Haims acknowledges that parenting young adults is a continuous learning process. Despite her credentials and expertise, she humbly admits that she is still figuring things out and undoing patterns in her own journey. She encourages listeners not to interpret her words as criticism but rather as lessons learned from her own experiences.
We examine the long-term effects of over-involvement on millennials and Gen Z. From helicopter parenting to the financial and emotional implications of extended adolescence, we tackle the difficult dynamics that parents face today. Strategies are offered for navigating this terrain, highlighting the importance of finding a delicate balance between supporting and enabling, and the necessity of preparing young adults to fend for themselves in an increasingly complex world.
We discuss practical steps for supporting young adults, emphasizing the value of allowing them to learn from their challenges and lead their own lives.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send your ideas for episodes and guests to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee and support our work!
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Should you be involved in your adult child's dating life? Listen and find out.
Discover the art of balancing parental involvement in your adult children's dating lives as we bring you insights from the esteemed matchmaker, Rachel Greenwald.
Our conversation takes a deep dive into the ever-evolving dating landscape, where technology and social media have turned dating into a skill that requires finesse and caution. Hear how the priorities of marriage and career are shifting among young adults, as highlighted by a compelling New York Times article.
The pandemic has left an indelible mark on dating behaviors, encouraging a shift towards meaningful connections over superficial interactions. We explore how family dynamics play a pivotal role in shaping romantic relationships and the importance of having open, constructive conversations about your child's partner choices. From the influence of family backgrounds to the art of effective communication, this episode is a treasure trove of insights for anyone navigating the complex world of modern dating.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send your ideas for episodes and guests to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee and support our work!
Support the show
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Unlock the secrets to fostering resilient and independent adult children with Dr. Charles Fay, co-founder and CEO of Love and Logic. We promise you'll gain actionable insights into shifting your parental role from caretaker to supportive guide, helping your children thrive as self-reliant individuals. Dr. Fay uncovers the pitfalls of parental guilt and codependency, offering practical strategies to empower your adult children to take charge of their own lives.
Ever wondered how to offer advice without taking over? Dr. Fay enlightens us on presenting choices without overwhelming, allowing your children to make informed decisions and grow from their mistakes. We explore the importance of effective communication, the power of empathy, and why sometimes saying less can mean more. Through engaging role-plays and real-life examples, discover the fine line between helping and enabling, ensuring your children develop the critical thinking and resilience necessary for adulthood.
Finally, learn how to set boundaries that foster mutual respect and independence. Dr. Fay shares his personal experiences and wisdom from his upcoming book on Raising Mentally Strong Kids. This episode is packed with profound advice on maintaining a balanced household where both parents and adult children can flourish. Join us for a thought-provoking journey into the heart of parenting adult children with love and logic.
A big thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer, for making this episode possible. We love hearing from you! Share your thoughts with us at biteyourtongue@gmail.com and follow us on Facebook and Instagram.
Support Our Podcast:You can support our podcast with a donation as small as $5, the equivalent of buying u
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Ever wondered how to better support your millennial children without overstepping? Tess Brigham, renowned as the "millennial therapist," joins us to share her unique journey from the glitz of Hollywood to the fulfilling world of psychotherapy. Discover her expert insights into fostering independence in young adults by encouraging them to solve their own problems, rather than simply handing them solutions. Tess's approach is all about guiding questions that empower young people to navigate their own challenges confidently.
Tess helps us unearth the pressures millennials face today, from social media comparisons to the looming "30 under 30" lists. We discuss the anxiety that accompanies unmet milestones and the fear of future failure, drawing intriguing parallels to the concerns faced by people in their sixties. Learn how to build trust in oneself through life transitions and the essential role parents play in this process, all while avoiding the trap of enabling. Tess sheds light on the evolving attitudes toward mental health among younger generations and the impact of technology on their work-life boundaries.
Get ready for practical, heartfelt advice on how to provide emotional support to your adult children. Tess emphasizes the power of supportive texts and acknowledging efforts in boosting confidence and happiness. We tackle the complexities of work-life balance, especially in a world where constant connectivity blurs the lines between professional and personal life. Gain valuable strategies for setting boundaries, achieving financial independence, and embracing generational differences in career expectations.
A big thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer, for making this episode possible. We love hearing from you! Share your thoughts with us at biteyourtongue@gmail.com and follow us on Facebook and Instagram.
Support Our Podcast:You can support our podcast with a donation as small as $5, the equivalent of buying us a “virtual” cup of coffee. Consider joining our squad with an annual membership starting at just $5 per month.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Would you like to unlock the secrets to building deeper, more rewarding relationships with your adult children?
Join us in this BONUS episode rewind for a compelling conversation with Dr. Ruth Nemzoff, author of "Don't Bite Your Tongue: How to Foster Rewarding Relationships with Your Adult Family."
Ruth shares her invaluable insights on transitioning from a central role in your children's lives to finding a new way to connect as they gain independence. We explore the delicate balance of offering advice without alienating your adult children and the nuances of maintaining a loving and supportive relationship through thoughtful and timely communication.
We tackle the practicalities and emotional challenges of redefining relationships when adult children return home or continue living at home. Learn essential strategies for setting clear expectations, negotiating roles, and offering the right kind of support. We delve into real-life scenarios to provide actionable advice on balancing household responsibilities, encouraging independence, and fostering mutual respect. Gain a deeper understanding of evolving social norms around intergenerational living and the importance of self-awareness in navigating these new dynamics.
Finally, we venture into the realm of communication and boundaries, offering insights on how to navigate relationships with in-laws and manage family dynamics. Discover the power of open communication, humor, and positivity in diffusing tension and enhancing connections. Ruth's wisdom reminds us that while relationships are inherently imperfect, thoughtful communication and a willingness to understand different family cultures can transform friction into closeness. Tune in for personal anecdotes, practical advice, and a heartfelt discussion on maintaining harmony and intimacy within your family.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a text
Another listener favorite! Today we discuss the sometimes difficult, yet rewarding relationships between mothers and daughters. We speak with Pam Tronson, parenting coach with a special certification in mother/daughter relationships.
The connection between a mother and daughter is one of the strongest and most important family relationships. Accepting that it can be difficult and messy is key to being able to navigate the highs and lows. Bound by love we are often disappointed when our adult relationships with our daughters don’t meet the dream we had for that relationship.
Pam offers solutions to help us let go of control and worry and avoid resentment. She discusses how the shame we feel, and the perceived “failed” relationship can get in the way of the repair that is needed.
Resolution only requires one person to change the trajectory of the relationship. And showing one another that they are worth the effort is impactful.
Beyond the personal stories and emotional shifts, Pam also discusses broader societal influences that affect motherhood. She addresses issues like parental anxiety, control, entitlement, and the normalization of worry. Highlighting the necessity of empathy and understanding different perspectives, Pam teaches us how redefining love and setting healthy boundaries can break the cycle of negative self-narratives. This episode is a treasure trove of heartfelt guidance, practical advice, and emotional support for anyone looking to navigate the complex, yet beautiful, bond between mothers and daughters.
Learning to practice self-care and to love yourself is the key to setting the necessary boundaries to build better, more meaningful relationships with our daughters.
It's always a good idea to listen again!
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a Text Message.
Ever felt the sting of disappointment when your adult children don't quite live up to your dreams for them? Join us in a special rewind episode where we sit down with the insightful Jane Adams, PhD, author of "When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us." Jane unpacks the emotional rollercoaster that many parents experience, offering her personal story and expert advice for letting go and allowing children to grow into their unique identities. Her years as a social psychologist and parent coach shine through, providing listeners with practical strategies to foster authentic and loving relationships with their adult kids.
We also tackle the heavy burden of parental guilt, especially in extreme situations like incarceration or drug addiction. We delve into the difference between guilt and regret, encouraging parents to support their children healthily without being consumed by unwarranted guilt. Setting boundaries and providing structured support are key themes as we also touch on the complexities of financial support and sibling rivalry. We wrap up by engaging our listeners for feedback and suggestions, stressing the importance of open communication within families. Tune in for a comforting and enlightening episode that promises to reshape your perspective on parenting adult children.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference.
Support the Show.
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Send us a Text Message.
We are answering your questions! When our inbox fills with numerous questions on a particular topic from listeners, we know it's time for a dedicated podcast episode addressing those questions. However, not every query requires a full episode but each deserves an insightful answer. In this special installment, we've compiled questions from you—our listeners via email and social media—and provided answers that we hope will resonate with many.
In this episode, we cover:
- Building strong bonds despite time and distance challenges.
- Navigating generational expectations and enhancing communication skills.
- Establishing healthy boundaries during divorce to support children without overstepping.
- Exploring how motivational interviewing techniques can empower adult children facing their own challenges.
- Addressing sibling estrangement and more.
We conclude with heartfelt discussions and actionable advice aimed at fostering stronger, healthier family relationships.
Special thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer. Share your thoughts with us at biteyourtongue@gmail.com and follow us on Facebook and Instagram.
Support Our Podcast: You can support us with a donation as small as $5—equivalent to buying us a "virtual" cup of coffee. Consider joining our squad with an annual membership starting at just $5 per month.
Support the Show.
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
In this episode we talk to Francine Russo, Francine Russo, a renowned journalist and author of "Love After 50: How to Find It, Enjoy It, and Keep It."
Francine shares her personal journey through widowhood and divorce, and the unique advantages of finding love later in life. She says new love in later years is the best love. Listen and find out why.
Merging families in adulthood, also known as adult stepfamilies or later lifestyle families, can be challenging. Some say it can take up to five years to create harmony, and that the divorce rate is higher for people who marry a second time.
Then there are the issues of pre-nuptials, estate planning and making sure your children are not left of the mix. This tends to be even more challenging with a second marriage, especially if you both have children from previous marriages or relationships.
We talk bout the legalities to consider prior to plunging into a second marriage. A significant difference in age and financial resources can also cause difficulties and potential delays. However, the consequences of avoiding this conversation are even more dire in a blended family because laws affecting estate distribution have been written to better fit the needs of a traditional first marriage.
We also talk about how to approach the sensitive topics of dating and divorce with your adult children and practical tips on when to introduce your new partner.
A big thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer. Share your thoughts with us at biteyourtongue@gmail.com and follow us on Facebook and Instagram.
Support Our Podcast:You can support our podcast with a donation as small as $5, the equivalent of buying us a “virtual” cup of coffee. Consider joining our squad with an annual membership starting at just $5 per month.
Support the Show.
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
We delve into the world of pregnancy and fertility challenges that our young adult children are facing. With couples taking longer to marry or start families, this has become a significant issue for young adults, and as parents, it’s crucial for us to understand the landscape. A listener reached out to request an exploration of this topic, so we invited Elizabeth King, a Certified Life Coach specializing in Fertility, Miscarriage, and New Mom Support, to join us. Elizabeth, a proud IVF warrior and mother of three children born after age 40, brings invaluable insights and experience to the conversation.
We discuss:
- Options for Young Couples: Our guest highlights that while the expenses can be significant, many companies offer partial coverage, and there are also grants and resources available. You can find more information and resources here.
- Miscarriage and Infertility: We dive into the emotional and psychological impacts of miscarriage and infertility. We also discuss how we can be supportive.
- Finding Trustworthy Care
- Advances in Science.
A big thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer, for making this episode possible. We love hearing from you! Share your thoughts with us at biteyourtongue@gmail.com and follow us on Facebook and Instagram.
Support Our Podcast:You can support our podcast with a donation as small as $5, the equivalent of buying us a “virtual” cup of coffee. Consider joining our squad with an annual membership starting at just $5 per month.
Support the Show.
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
What if simply engaging in thoughtful conversations could transform your understanding of the LGBTQIA+ community? In our latest episode of Bite Your Tongue, we celebrate Pride Month with the Emmy-nominated Matthew Rodriguez, the insightful host and executive producer of "It's Okay to Ask Questions."
Through heartfelt narratives and candid discussions, we unravel the complexities surrounding pronoun respect, gender identity, and the often-overlooked struggles of intersex and transgender individuals. Hear the poignant story of Pidgeon Pigonas, an intersex individual subjected to surgeries without consent, and understand the far-reaching implications for intersex and transgender rights.
We also explore the evolving role of parents in supporting their children's diverse dreams and aspirations. Reflecting on personal experiences and shared stories, we highlight the importance of allyship, education, and vocal support in creating a more inclusive environment. Tune in to learn how to engage in meaningful conversations and build stronger, more understanding relationships with your adult children.
A big thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer, for making this episode possible. We love hearing from you! Share your thoughts with us at biteyourtongue@gmail.com and follow us on Facebook and Instagram.
Support Our Podcast:You can support our podcast with a donation as small as $5, the equivalent of buying us a “virtual” cup of coffee. Consider joining our squad with an annual membership starting at just $5 per month.
Support the Show.
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
What happens when your sweet, funny, smart, enthusiastic child turns out to have a mental illness? Where do you go for help? Who do you turn to for advice? And what if those institutions and experts fail you and more importantly, fail your young adult? What happens when everywhere you look for help or support you come up disappointed and alone?
In today’s episode we hear from a couple whose family, much like any of ours, has been turned upside down because of a drastic change in their son’s mental health, subsequent drug issues, and the failure of our mental health systems that we assume are trained well enough to handle these challenges.
It is a silent struggle we bring a voice to today. The Holtons bear their souls, recounting their son Patrick's descent from youthful athleticism to one ensnared by the clutches of dextromethorphan abuse. Sometimes called Robo-Tripping. The drug of choice is Robitussin, easily accessible over the counter to just about anyone.
Their narrative addresses the sometimes treacherous waters of the healthcare system, the cold reality of guardianship rights, and the isolation that so often accompanies mental health crises.
The Holten share their story in hopes that it will help other families with a young adult facing similar challenges. They suggest support networks such as NAMI and and the necessity of perseverance when confronting mental illness and substance abuse.
Their experiences shed light on the significance of seeking the right medical advice, staying the course despite heartbreak, and cherishing the moments of joy amidst the pain.
Links: https://www.nami.org
A big thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer. Send your thoughts to biteyourtongue@gmail.com and follow us on Facebook and Instagram.
Support us with a donation as little as $5 (purchasing a “virtual” cup of coffee). Or joining our squad with a year's membership as low as $5 per month. Link here now: SUPPORT US.
Support the Show.
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
This episode will defy nearly everything we've talked about over the past few years.
Our guest Jeffrey Arnett, Ph.D is renowned for proposing coined the theory and term “emerging adult” in the early 2000’s. He characterizes this stage of life by exploration, instability, and boundless optimism.
But when we talk about technology, sex, and societal patterns he outwardly rejects much of the current research and tells us why.
We take a look at how things have changed since his original book in 2013 Getting to 30: A Parent’s Guide to the 20-Something Years to his latest book Emerging Adulthood: The Winding Road from Late Teens Through the Twenties.
What we talk about:
Significant changes that have occurred over the past decade. We tackle the topic of sex and how the current generation's approach to it has evolved.
We get to the digital world and how completely disagrees with much of the so-called research and its lack of firm causation results.
He also offers some advice for staying connected to your young adults and leaves us with an optimistic view.
He discusses the historical pattern of societal issues and how they played out in past generations (including ours!)
And we touch on our grandchildren’s generation and the recent Los Angeles Times article “Millennials Gave Birth to ‘Generation Alpha.’ Are these kids already doomed?”
Our takeaway is that maybe we shouldn’t be so quick to stereotype any generation. Maybe we allow them to come out of the emerging adulthood stage as fully realized adults and they will prove all the naysayers wrong.
Listen and let us know what you think.
A big thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer. Send your thoughts to biteyourtongue@gmail.com and follow us on Facebook and Instagram.
Support us with a donation as little as $5 (purchasing a “virtual” cup of coffee). Or joining our squad with a year's membership as low as $5 per month. Link here now: SUPPORT US.
Support the Show.
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
When we think of Mother's Day, we often envision breakfast in bed or a sweet card, but the truth is, the gifts that mothers cherish most are the bonds they share with their children, no matter their age.
That is what we hear today from our guests. Mary Dell Harrington and Lisa Heffernan. They are the founders of Grown & Flown, the very popular website and social media stops. Together, we unpack the transition from managing a bustling household to adapting to an 'empty nest', and how this shift doesn't mean the end of parenting, but the beginning of a new chapter.
We get a behind the scenes look at how they started, what is the most valuable advice they've learned and what they see on the horizon.
We talk about so much including:
- Adapting different strategies for each child's unique needs
- Significance of Mother's Day to many and how to set clear expectations
- Multi-generation living and why taking the failure out of "failure to launch" is so important
- How the pandemic has re-shaped our understanding of family living situations.
- Complexities of financial support and how to handle it
- Spirituality, mental health and so much more.
Grown and Flown Links
Link here for College Admissions: Grown and Flown membership helps parents through the college admissions process. Sign up for theirnewsletter here. Link here to join their community o parents of teens, college students, young adults.
A big thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer. Send your thoughts to biteyourtongue@gmail.com and follow us on Facebook and Instagram.
Support us with a donation as little as $5 (purchasing a “virtual” cup of coffee). Or joining our squad with a year's membership as low as $5 per month. Link here now: SUPPORT US.
Support the Show.
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
This episode dives deep into resilience. We talk to a resilience expert and parenting coach about how to build resilience - in ourselves and our adult children.
Why do we sometimes look at the bad and forget to remember and be grateful for the positive? Our guests explain that neuroscience tells us that we are programmed to look at the negative and much more difficult to remind ourselves of the positives.
We discuss the process that involves building our resilience muscles, such as positivity, confidence, and creativity. Our guests are Linda Hoopes, founder of the Resilience Alliance , a licensed psychologist whose professional work focuses on resilience. Joining Linda is Kris Burbank, a parenting coach for all stages of life to enhance their skills as professionals, parents, and partners. Together they co-authored the book, Embracing Another Normal: Resilience Stories and Strategies for Raising Children with Disabilities.
Though originally targeted for parents of families with children with disabilities, the book has grabbed the attention of all parents struggling to find their strength in parenting as their children move through life into young adulthood.
Their book begins with this quote from Winnie the Pooh to Christopher Robin:
“Promise me you’ll always remember. That you’re braver than you believe and stronger than you seem. And smarter than you know.”
A big thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer. Send your thoughts to biteyourtongue@gmail.com and follow us on Facebook and Instagram.
Support us with a donation as little as $5 (purchasing a “virtual” cup of coffee). Or joining our squad with a year's membership as low as $5 per month. Link here now: SUPPORT US.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Maybe you've recently read these headlines in the New York Times or The Wall Street Journal.
- "Well Into Adulthood and Still Getting Money From Their Parents. Nearly 60% of parents provide financial help to their adult kids, a new study finds." WSJ
- "Parents Are Highly Involved in Their Adult Children’s Lives, and Fine With ItNew surveys show that today’s intensive parenting has benefits, not just risks, and most young adults seem happy with it, too." (NYT)
What you didn't know is that these articles just covered a small bit of the extensive 2024 Pew Research study titled Parents, Young Adult Children and the Transition to Adulthood. The Pew Research Center is a non-partisan "fact tank" that helps inform the public about issues, attitudes and trends shaping our world.
Today, we go behind the scenes to chat with one of the lead researchers on the study, Rachel Minkin and uncover what those big headlines really mean.
We sort through the data helping listeners understand the stats and what the study really explores.
Tune in to learn more about key milestones for young adults today vs. 30 years ago, financial help and independence in young adulthood, how parents really think their kids are doing, relationships, advice and even living together (you will be surprised that it works for many families.
A big thank you to Connie Gorant fisher, our audio engineer and the look and feel of the podcast. Send your thoughts and comments to biteyourtongue@gmail.com and we love to hear your ideas for future episodes. And follow us on Facebook and Instagram.
Thank you to those of you who already support us. With a donation of $5 you can help keep us going. Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy us a “virtual” cup of coffee or subscribe for a monthly subscription. Every bit helps.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Do you have a favorite child? Maybe you think you don't but there are things you do or say that show something different.
Today we delve into the much overlooked topic of sibling relationships. We speak with Fern Schumer Chapman author o the book Brothers, Sisters, Strangers. Siblings are the longest relationship we will have in our lives - and our children's. They share our history our family and our story. Chapman shares her personal life story that led her to write this book.
We talk about sibling rejection and how that can lead to feelings of self-blame, questioning one's worth, and a sense of loss. Individuals may constantly ruminate on what went wrong and how they can mend the relationship, leading to a significant emotional toll. This ongoing emotional pain can be likened to a persistent toothache or a wound that refuses to heal.
Chapman shares risk factors that may cause sibling rifts and what our role as parents we play. By acknowledging these risk factors and perilous turning points, research provides valuable insights into the complexities of sibling relationships. Understanding these factors can help individuals navigate and potentially reconcile with estranged siblings.
We also identify when it is safer for siblings to separate and why.
There is no question that sibling relationships serve as a blueprint for future relationships with friends, colleagues, and romantic partners. The qualities of tolerance, generosity, and loyalty instilled by siblings can influence how individuals navigate social interactions throughout their lives. This episode helps us understand it all.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
For today's episode we brought back Tony and Alisa DiLorenzo to discuss their new book "The Secret to Breaking the Conflict Cycle in Your Marriage," and to share their wisdom on maintaining strong connections in all our relationships - and that means with our adult kids too!
We talk about the need to actively engage in conflict resolution rather than avoiding or ignoring issues. (which most of us do!)
By being intentional, individuals can identify the root causes of conflicts, understand their own triggers and reactions, and work towards constructive solutions.
Intentionality involves setting clear goals for improving communication, understanding, and connection within relationships. It requires a commitment to addressing issues head-on and seeking resolution rather than letting conflicts fester.
Some of the key points include:
- Being intentional and taking action
- Words have power
- Knowing yourself; addressing your own weaknesses
- Understand your conflict cycle
This one's all about strengthening relationships with your spouse and your adult child. Tune in for some valuable insights and tips! #RelationshipsMatter
Remember, it's never too late to work on your relationship and create a positive impact on your family and future generations.
Visit One Extra-Ordinary Marriage website to review and download other free tools that you will like. Link to Conflict Cycle Workbook.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Today we speak with the legendary Charles Fay, Ph.D. who, with his father Jim Fay and Dr. Foster W. Cline foundedLove and Logic.For many years parents have turned to Love and Logic for guidance for their young children. It is a trusted research-driven, whole child approach to child-rearing.
And now - guess what? Dr. Fay is talking about how Love and Logic works for building healthy relationships with our young adult children!
We talk about their new book coming out in March 2024 that includes a chapter on young Adults. The book is titled, “Raising Mentally Strong Kids: How to Combine the Power of Neuroscience with Love and Logic and Grow Confident, Kind, Responsible, and Resilient Children and Young Adults”, written by neuroscientist Dr. Daniel Amen and Dr. Charles Fay.
Dr. Fay explains:
- How the successful techniques used with our toddlers and teens can now apply to our adult children.
- He outlines the five Steps of Empathy and how this helps free young adults to make their decisions -- but also live with the consequences.
- How giving up our own control puts the power into our adult children’s hands
- What is the risk of setting them free?
- How can we set our own boundaries when needed and why it is important?
- By removing the chaos we create deposits into a healthier parent-adult relationship.
Two important takeaways:
- “We can never consistently work harder on someone else’s life than they are”
- “The more words I use, the more ineffective I become”.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Send ideas to biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
In today’s episode Denise and Kirsten chat with renowned matchmaker Rachel Greenwald. Do you ever worry your adult child will never find a partner? Do they spend too much time with their career rather than love? Do you feel like they are always picking the wrong person? Today we discuss whether parents should meddle in their adult child's dating life. Greenwald offers insights about if, when, and how to navigate this tricky issue that impacts the whole family. We dig deep into the changing dating world that our adults are navigating. Greenwald explains the difference between a Dating Coach, a Matchmaker, and an Online Concierge.
New York Times columnist David Brooks sparked debate about that after he published his column “To Be Happy, Marriage Matters More Than Career.” Greenwald tells us why she agrees with Brooks and how the COVID Pandemic changed dating and relationships in a positive way. She tells us how to approach the subject with our adult children using words that are nonjudgemental.
Listen for more on: Skills for dating today; how dating has become about gamification; Does coming from a divorced or challenged family impact partner choices? She discusses other options for helping your adult child in this area of their life including dating boot camps, podcasts and books. We will share those links in social media.
We discuss dating for seniors too! Remember to listen to the interesting podcast Behind the Swipe, exploring issues facing men and women over 40 navigating the confusing world of online dating.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer. Write to us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com and let us know your questions and ideas for episodes!
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Today we discuss the sometimes difficult, yet rewarding relationships between mothers and daughters.
We speak with Pam Tronson, parenting couch with a special certification in mother/daughter relationships.
The connection between a mother and daughter is one of the strongest and most important family relationships. Accepting that it can be difficult and messy is key to being able to navigate the highs and lows. Bound by love we are often disappointed when our adult relationships with our daughters don’t meet the dream we had for what that relationship could look like. We have to reframe the image.
Pam offers solutions to help us let go of control and worry and avoid resentment. She discusses how the shame we feel, about the perceived “failed” relationship, gets in the way of the repair that is needed.
Resolution only requires one person to change the trajectory of the relationship. And showing one another that they are worth the effort is impactful.
Learning to practice self-care and to love yourself is the key to setting the necessary boundaries to build better, more meaningful relationships with our daughters.
Asking the right questions of ourselves and our daughters will help guide productive conversations. What else could be true? Am I part of the problem or part of the solution? How does this service in its current state? Why am I choosing this aspect of my story?
And learn to stop comparing ourselves and our relationships with our daughters to what we perceive others have.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Write to us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com and let us know your questions and ideas for episodes!
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram.
Support Us here:
- Sustaining member: Small donation once a month
- A one-time virtual cup of coffee - $5
Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
We're thrilled to be joined by Julie Lythcott-Haims, the author of "How to Raise an Adult" and "Your Turn." As a former dean at Stanford University, Julie offers a unique lens to view the nuanced world of parenting, and the perils that lurk within the shadows of over-involvement.
This captivating episode is a deep dive into the challenging world of raising children into responsible adults. Julie illuminatingly discusses the societal pressures that implore parents to hover, the pitfalls of over-parenting, and her expert insights on striking the crucial balance between supporting and empowering young adults.
From discussing the financial struggles of young adults and the potential solution of multi-generational living, to the consequential impact of the political climate on their decision-making, we're crossing a vast expanse of challenges.
We stress the importance of treating adult children as independent adults, setting boundaries, and open communication.
We also delve into the nitty-gritty of different parenting styles, from authoritative to neglectful, underscoring the significance of being an authoritative parent who sets rules while demonstrating love and care.
As our children grow into adults, we discuss transitioning to a more supportive and consultative role and offering practical parenting advice. This episode is packed with profound insights and practical advice, promising to be an engaging, insightful, and enlightening discussion on raising responsible adults. So, hit the play button and let's reshape the future of our relationships with adult children together!
Link to HOW TO BE AN ADULT TED TALK WITH JULIE.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer. Write to us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com and let us know your questions and ideas for episodes!
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
We had a fantastic time chatting with the talented author and journalist, Jessica Grose, who helped us understand the intricate landscape of parenting today and how she fares as a young adult. We talk about how we can support our young adult children today.
Her book, Screaming on the Inside, the Unsustainability of American Motherhood, is both an historical look at motherhood and a sounding alarm on the state of motherhood today. She acknowledges that one major change in society could make a big difference for parents today. Do you think you know what it is?
Jessica Grose is an Opinion Writer for The New York Times and if you have not read her articles - you must subscribe now. She brings two sides to this interview. The side of a young mother balancing career and family and being a young adult.
She wrote an article for The New York Times titled “Your Mom is Destined to Annoy You: how to manage your inevitable holiday regression,” and then after the height of COVID, when folks started traveling again, she wrote an article titled “The Return of the Holiday Season Agita.”
In today's episode we talk about it all. Jess is truly one of the most grounded young adults I've spoken with in a long time. I told her this in the interview and she takes an educated guess as to why she is this way. We talk about how motherhood has changed over the years but also how it has stayed the same. You will be surprised to hear a quote she shares from The New York Times Parenting columnist Catherine Mackenzie from 1939.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer. Write to us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com and let us know your questions and ideas for episodes!
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Today's episode we speak with the "Godmother of Silicon Valley," Esther Wojcicki.
If you have not heard of her - you must listen to this episode.
She is the author of the best selling book "How to Raise Successful People - Simple Lessons for Radical Results"
She's as expert no doubt because she has raised three enormously successful daughters including Susan Wojcicki, who was the CEO of Youtube from 2014 to 2023. Janet Wojcicki, a professor of Pediatrics and Anne Wojcicki, co-founder and CEO of 23 and Me.
How does this relate to our adult children? She talks about a strategy she calls TRICK – Trust, Respect, Independence, Collaboration and Kindness.
Each of these are essential in our relationships with our adult children. She gives advice to those listeners who are grandparents and also a general overview of the challenging world we are all in today.
What is our role? How schools are failing our kids and once again the role of over-involment in our children’s lives and how this impacts their journey in life.
Hear her thoughts on nature vs nurture and much more.
Thank so much to Connie Gorant Fisher our audio engineer. Write to us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com and let us know your questions and ideas for episodes!
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
This is a not to be missed episode!
We talk to Dr. Gene Beresin, Executive director of The Clay Center for Young Healthy Minds at Massachusetts General Hospital (MGH), a full professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, and senior educator in child and adolescent psychiatry at MGH
His 40-years of experience working with youth and young adults has given him an enormous breath of knowledge. And, in addition to his professional life, he's learned quite a bit about building healthy relationships with adult children, since he is a father of four with nine grandkids! He tells us that almost all of them moved home after college or between college and grad school. He says that they all have kids -- making family relationships complex, but incredibly rich and rewarding. You will have to listen for more! A sampling of the topics:
- Work-life balance.
- Boomerang Kids (a listener question).
- Which generation is the loneliest and most entitled?
- AI, robots -- our adult kids and the future.
- Racism.
- How socioeconomic status plays into relationships with adult children.
- Our expectations and impulse control.
- Gap years - and more.
Huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Write to us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com and let us know your questions and ideas for episodes!
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Struggling with your adult kids? Are they about to cut you out of their lives or you just want to build a stronger relationship? We cover it all in this episode, where we speak with Dr. Joshua Coleman about two of his books:
- When Parents Hurt: Compassionate Strategies When You and Your Grown Child Don't Get Along
- Rules of Estrangement: Why Adult Children Cut Ties and How to Heal the Conflict
Dr. Coleman speaks with us about the shift in culture and parenting that has led to an alarming increase in adult children choosing to be estranged from one or both of their parents. These children are quick to blame parents for everything they see as not working in their own lives or holding them back from the life they want.
With Dr. Coleman, we explore reasons behind that shift and the effects of how parents can and should respond for less conflict. How do we navigate estrangement from our adult children? Can we avoid it? And who is in the driver’s seat?
Dr. Coleman shares his own personal experience with an adult child who chose to be estranged for a period of time, and how he was able to navigate that experience.
Most importantly, Dr. Coleman shares the importance of taking care of ourselves through parenting our adult children while acknowledging that our relationships with our adult children may not be what we imagined.
We welcome Kirsten Heckendorf, mother of three adult children as our guest host.
A huge thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Write to us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com and let us know your questions and ideas for episodes!
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram.
And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference.
expectations #realizations #takingthehighroad #parentingadults #parenting #adults
mentalhealth
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Today we speak with Kimberly Damon. Kim, a certified life coach who wears a multitude of hats.
Kim discusses the importance of finding a lesson in everything, practicing self-reflection and embracing acceptance. These themes highlight the transformative power of personal growth and understanding in relationships, particularly between parents and their adult children.
Kim shares her own journey of experiencing estrangement with her children and parents, which compelled her to seek solutions and mend these fractured relationships. She helps us learn to take responsibility for our own happiness and healing our emotions, while also recognizing that we are not alone in our struggles.
We also talk about negative thoughts and how we sometimes develop these about ourselves or our relationships with our adult kids. How to take charge of these thoughts and realize that sometimes they may not necessarily be true. This can lead to negative emotions and inaccurate perceptions of our circumstances.
I promised a link to the video Kim's Empty Nest Conference where Denise was interviewed. Link here to view.
Here is a link to Kim’s website, her podcast, Midlife Worthy Moms; and her work as an Enneagram Coach. Kim is also offering a FREE Thriving Workbook and 3-Part Video. Just visit this link to sign up.
Thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher our audio engineer.
Email us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com and let us know what you think.
Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com to support us for as little as $5 and
Follow up on our social media platforms: Facebook Instagram Twitter
And remember sometimes you have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
On Mother's Day 2023, my daughter Catie sent me a link to a book and wrote, "the author and her mom would make great guests on your podcast."
The book “What to Do When I’m Gone, A Mother’s Wisdom to her Daughter” sparked my interest. I ordered the book and loved it. I told my daughter I would love to do an episode with the authors of this book - as long as she was the guest co-host. She agreed.
So here we are, two adult children and two mothers talking about death.
We talk to illustrator/writer Hallie Bateman and her mom, retired journalist Suzy Hopkins on navigating the world without the person who gave you life. We discuss the sometimes difficult relationships with mothers and daughters, preserving memories and family history and the ups and downs of their collaboration.
It's a funny, fun and thoughtful episode that I think anyone with adult sons or daughters would enjoy. Hallie tells us that many readers wrote that the book inspired them to build stronger relationships with their sons, daughters, relatives, friends – even pets.
And they have another book on the way - What to Do When You Get Dumped! Suzy shares the personal story that inspired this book.
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher our audio engineer. Write to us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com and let us know your questions and ideas for episodes!
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5 you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
In this episode, we talk to Dr. Laurence Steinberg about his new book - You and Your Adult Child: How to Grow Together During Challenging Times.
He brings us a whole new perspective. Touted as the first comprehensive guide for parents navigating the crucial decades of their children's lives, we explore everything so many issues. We delve into the complexities of the parent-adult child relationship and discuss the challenges and changes that come with this stage of life.
Steinberg shares valuable insights on topics such as setting boundaries, fostering autonomy, and navigating financial support. We explore the impact of societal changes on the parent-adult child dynamic and how to build a positive relationship during this crucial phase.
It's a must-listen for anyone seeking to strengthen their relationship with their adult children or gain a deeper understanding of this unique stage of life.
We cover many topics ranging from whether you should be involved in your child’s college education, how to behave when they unexpectedly must move back home, how to state your opinion on their romantic partners, what to do when you disagree with the way they are raising their own child, and what parameters to apply if you want to give them money for a specific reason.
Steinberg helps us understand the challenging climate our young adult children are navigating and how we can be supportive yet not intrusive. He offers some real tools and new ideas about navigating this journey.
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher our audio engineer. Write to us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com and let us know your questions and ideas for episodes!
Also remember to follow us on Facebook and Instagram. And once again, with just a donation of $5, you can help us keep going! Visit our website at biteyourtonguepodcast.com and select SUPPORT US. You can buy a "virtual" cup of coffee for $5 and it will make a huge difference.
Support the show
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our'') or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLELY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
It's June and that is typically wedding season. So we thought we'd combine our two wedding episodes into one BEST OF THE BEST. You will hear first from fAleigh Huston-Lyons, a therapist and coach at AisleTalk: Consultation & Therapy. A boutique practice devoted to helping brides and grooms cope with the stresses that arise during wedding planning and anticipation of marriage. From engagement and finances to the invite list and drama, Aleigh puts in all in perspective. Social media has taken a toll on weddings and learn how Aleigh gives some sound advice on keeping it all under control.
Next we welcome Michelle Martinez, who is not only a Certified Wedding Consultant, with more than 20 years in the wedding and events industry, but also the creator and host of the world's mosts popular wedding podcast - The Big Wedding Planning Podcast. With 300 episodes under her belt and nearly three million downloads, she's been around the block a few times!
It seems to all come back to what Julie Dolan told us in our grand-parenting episode about being the loving and loyal servant.
If you are in the stages of wedding planning and don't have the budget for a big time wedding planner, Michelle now offers a masterclass on her website. A tiny percent of what a full wedding planner would cost. Check it out her Master Class offer here.
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher our audio engineer who did her very best in editing, cutting and splicing these two episodes together!
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our”) or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
It's Pride Month and we are taking a second look at the LGBTQ+ community.
We have two guests. The first is Linda K. Reeves, a licensed marriage and family therapist certified as a gender specialist by the World Professional Association for Transgender Health. She is the founder of Linda K. Reeves Therapy. Her therapy utilizes her clinical skills in the treatment of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, gender non-binary, questioning, and queer identified individuals.
Her recent article in Good Housekeeping, "How to Support Your LGBTQ+ Kid When He, She or They Come Out," got our attention. We talk to her about this and well as what it means for a young person to come out to their family and friends. We discuss how to respond to your child or friend and what to say and what not to say. We also talk about the current continued discrimination against the LGBTQ+ community,
We switch gears entirely when we welcome a Tik-Tok sensation - JannaTransMomma. (she explains the unusual spelling of mamma). Janna is a a single mom to a trans child named Cody. She’s been identified as a key influencer on Tik-Tok (love it or hate it) for making a real difference for trans youth.
She gives us a quick 101 lesson on what it means to be transgender, how to support your child and/or friends or family. Janna shares some of the scary statistics about trans people and suicide. Acceptance, she says, will save a life. She is honest about the mistakes she made on her journey and is funny, delightful and very knowledgeable. She shares these sites for additional resources: Pflag: plfag.org
Rainbow Youth Project : RainbowYouthProject.org and Uplift Outreach Center: UpliftOutreachCenter.org
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us : Visit Biteyourtonguepodcast.com for many ways to keep us going!
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our”) or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Welcome back to THE most downloaded episode of Season 2.
Our guest today, one of the foremost experts who studies how individuals and families develop and change throughout their lives, tells us that as we age, we regret not reconciling with family members we may be estranged or distant from.
Today we welcome Dr. Karl Pillemer, Professor of Human Development at Cornell University, where he is also a faculty member in Cornell’s medical school. He is the author of the book: “Fault Lines, Fractured Families and How to Mend Them.” He is the author of several other remarkable books about love, relationships and aging.
We are also welcoming a guest host - Stacie Lavato. Stacie is a long-time listener and reached out to us after we dropped the episode on understanding LGBTQ+ with Levi Teachey and Stacey Shigaya. She wrote such a heartwarming email and the two of us connected. Then, I learned that Stacy produces her own podcast called “Mindful Mama Conversations,” I listened to a few, and I liked her topics and her style, so I asked her to join me.
The biggest “ah ha” moment for Stacie and I is when Dr. Pillemar mentioned “intergenerational stake.” We both had never heard of this - but it makes perfect sense. It is the generational bias in parents' and adult children's perceptions of their joint relationship.
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us P L E A S E!
Buy us a coffee:LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Listen on: Apple Podcasts Spotify or wherever you find your fav podcasts!
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our”) or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Happy Mother’s Day!
Today we are joined by two amazing moms with great advice for keeping our relationships with our adult children healthy, fun and spirited.
Also listen for some special Mother’s Day messages of support and advice from some young adults!
This will be an episode that will get you thinking, make you smile and lift you up.
We hope you enjoy it!
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us P L E A S E!
Buy us a coffee:LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Great Deal for Listeners!
Denise's favorite shape-wear company. Denise particularly LOVES their best selling Truekind Daily Comfort Wireless Bra. "It holds you up and is so comfortable. I am hooked - truly," says Denise. There are also camis, underwear, leggings and much more! Use this link and just put biteyourtongue (one word) in the CODE at checkout.
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our”) or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Street Interviews with Young Adults and Parents from Around the World!
As the old saying goes, “the best laid plans of mice and men oft go astray.” That is exactly what happened.
Denise's plan to visit Ellen in Prague took a turn when Ellen, then in Boston, tested positive for COVID just a few days before her planned trip to Prague for Denise's arrival.
She thought she might join a few days later if she tested negative, but her mother, who lives in Wisconsin, took a fall and Ellen went to take care of her. Denise and her husband, Kevin, spent 10 days in Prague in Ellen’s apartment... sadly, without Ellen. The episode we had planned, about Ellen's book, had to be cancelled!
So, today we are sharing street interviews with parents and adult children that Denise conducted in Prague. We interviewed people from Germany, New Zealand, Great Britain, the US and more. We also include some interviews from New York City’s Central Park.
We learned pretty quickly that some of the struggles parents have with their adult children are global issues. You will have to listen to learn more - it’s a fun episode!
Thank you to Connie Gorant Fisher, who took what we gave her and made the episode quite special and unique.
Support us P L E A S E! Buy us a coffee:LINK HERE. Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Follow up on our social media platforms: Facebook Instagram Twitte
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our”) or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
This episode digs deep. Today we interview Daniel Maté, who, with his father Dr. Gabor Maté has been holding highly engaging and popular workshops called “Hello Again - A Fresh Start for Parents and Their Adult Children."
He points out that they do not call their workshops "a happy ending," instead it is a "fresh start." Everyone's fresh start will look different and he talks about how to get there.
Dr. Maté, Daniel's father is a renowned speaker and author who, as his website says: "weaves together scientific research, case histories, and his own insights and experience to present a broad perspective that enlightens and empowers people to promote their own healing and that of those around them."
And that is what we hear from Daniel today. How they work with parents and adult children and sort carefully this "intense, speedy relationship." "Once you are an adult," he says, your relationship with your parents is a choice...that comes with risks, rewards and pitfalls." This is not an episode with "answers," this is an episode to truly get you to think and examine so many aspects of yourself, your child-rearing and your adult children. This episode will help you realize what is possible.
Read more about Daniel and his father's book, the New York Times best selling book “The Myth of Normal.” Link to Daniel's Mental Chiropractic Service and as an award-winning composer, lyricist, and playwright for musical theatre don't miss his podcast -- Let’s Get Lyrical.
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us P L E A S E!Buy us a coffee:LINK HEREBuy a mug:
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our”) or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Disrespect. We've all been there with our grown children. The rolling of the eyes, the under the breath grunt and sometimes just complete disrespect. Is it normal? How do we react and handle it?
Today we speak with Jennifer Williams who is the founder of Heartmanity and the Heartmanity Center, located in Bozeman, Montana. Her passion is to help people create thriving relationships.
She wrote a blog titled “How to Deal with a Disrespectful Grown Child” and we thought well that’s a topic we’d all like to delve deep into. I don’t know about you, but I was a bit of a “know it all” in my early adult years and not always as respectful as I could have been to my own parents. So why am I surprised when I get a bit of lip from my kiddos? Well, let's find out.
She takes us deep into understanding our role, how to lead with empathy, set boundaries and build the relationship we all deserve. She also offers and explains three key actions parents can take to stay connected and have a great relationship with their adult children - whatever age they are!
We hope you enjoy it!
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us P L E A S E!
Buy us a coffee:LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our”) or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Before you listen to the episode make sure to download the APP INNERCAST on Apple or Android. Create a FREE account and this episode will pop up. Innercast is a podcasting app where you listen, discuss and connect in one place! You can have a REAL conversation about this episode. Tell us what you liked about our guests advice, give us your advice and ask more questions - we will get them answered! We can't wait to hear from you! This app was started by a young man and I really want to support his efforts. Let's give it a try so he can see if it works!
Today we talk to Dr. Jefferey Berstien. He is a licensed clinical psychologist who has been helping children, teens, couples and families for over thirty years. He is the author of several books including his latest - now coming out in its third edition called 10-days to a Less Defiant Child. The articles he has written are numerous covering many subjects. Because of his breadth of experience we thought we’d use this episode to ask Dr. Bernstein many of our listener questions.
We talk about disrespect, significant others, identifying if it's a struggle or are we or they choosing not to? Identifying our own baggage and moving forward to really begin to establish a relationship that is strong and satisfying for all parties. Dr. Bernstein role plays with us to really help us find the right words.
**Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us P L E A S E!
Buy us a coffee:LINK HERE*.* Buy a mug: LINK HERE**
Follow us on: Facebook Instagram Twitter
And remember sometimes you may have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our”) or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Today we speak with Tracy Hargen who tells us about her journey to becoming a featured writer on so many topics for the popular website Grown and Flown.
She helps us, with real ideas, for starting conversations with our adult children that are not just about their jobs and relationships, but work to build our relationship with them as adults.
We talk about this article “We Absolutely Made the Right Choice to be Friends with Our Children.” and why this matters so much. And even if you are starting late she says "Parenting is the ultimate friendship – you will always be bound by DNA to have a relationship but friendship is choice," with many suggestions for getting started.
We talk about her son and his battle with mental health disease and how her family faced this journey. This article she wrote exploded on Grown and Flown ranking as one of the top downloaded blog posts for the year! Here is a link to the article. She talks about the picture that is featured with this story.
We also talk about her article, What's Important Now? Now That my Children are Grown, What is My Purpose? We discuss the questions we need to ask ourselves as we enter into this new stage of life. There is so much more! We loved chatting with Tracy and hope you will visit her site and read all of her blog posts - they resonated with us!
Write to us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com - share your ideas and thoughts about new episodes and topics!
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher our audio engineer.
Support us P L E A S E!
Buy us a coffee:LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our”) or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Before we get into this episode I want to remind listeners to sign up for this FREE "Graceful Empty-Nester" Virtual Conference. It begins on February 19 and runs through Feb 28. There are featured experts with strategies to reconnect with your children, heal relationships and inspire a future of connectivity! You can listen to one two or all of them! Denise is one of the guests and shares some of the bests pieces of advice from all of our 40+ episodes. Link her to grab your front seat!
Today we are replaying a wonderful episode about religion and spirituality. Just passing a few major religious holidays we thought it would be important to re-visit our feelings about our adult children and their religious choices.
How many of you struggled to get your adult child to attend religious services or maybe you are worried about your grandchild having any religious upbringing.
Whatever your concerns you will love this wonderful discussion with the Reverend Elizabeth P. Randall and Galit Pinksy Gottlieb.
Elizabeth is the Rector at St. Andrew's Episcopal Church in Denver, Colorado. She is a graduate of Smith College and Yale Divinity School and was one of the first clergy in Denver to recognize and perform weddings for the LGBTQ community. She’s been happily married for over 30-years to someone who is Jewish. Together they have one daughter. Since the interview, Elizabeth is now a grandmother to a wonderful grandson named Frank.
Galit, who practices Conservative Judaism, served as a Synagogue Cantor for many years. She is also an author as well as a mother and the wife of a Jewish scholar. Her children were raised in the Jewish tradition and now are all in long-term relationships with non-Jewish partners.
So many journeys to understand, learn and accept. We think both Elizabeth and Galit offer support, understanding and some brilliant and thoughtful ideas and approaches.
Galit is also an author of a wonderful mystery book series called the Whipped and Sipped Mysteries.
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our”) or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Don't underestimate how much the people who come after you are going to know about you!Today, our guest is Erik Vance. He is an award-winning story-teller and New York Times editor based in Boulder, Colorado. (lucky guy).
We came upon an article he wrote called: "How I Time-Travel to Parent My Adult Son." When we started to read it really had nothing to do with adult kids, but then it did.
Backstory: Vance says: “Once a year I record a brutally honest conversation for my little boy. " He says (and we confront him on this) that is doing it now because he thinks he is more interesting at this age than in 20 years! We don't think so!
Our Adult Kids and Grandkids: it is never too late and don’t underestimate how much the people who come after you are going to want to know about you. Think about it.
- If you could listen to your mother or father NOW and hear how they felt when you were a young adult - wouldn't you savor it?
- If you could hear the voices of your grandparents and learn more about their journey - what a gift!
I think all of us agree that we would love to hear the voices and experiences of our parents and grandparents - honest talk about their lives and struggles -- and as Erik said it can only help them feel like they can do it too.
It's not too late. We are going to give it a shot and hope that this interview with Erik encourages many of our listeners to do the same,
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us P L E A S E!
Buy us a coffee:LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HEREShapermint: 20% off with the code biteyourtongue at checkout
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our”) or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
This is the most requested topic by our listeners!
We talk to Dr. Mark McConville,a Clinical Psychologist and author of the book - “Failure to Launch,” Why Your Twentysomething Hasn’t Grown Up….What to Do About It. Dr. McConville is an expert in adolescent psychology and his groundbreaking book comes at a time when 2.2 million young adults in America are struggling to find their way in the world.
We talk about the root cause of the problem, why modern young adults are failing to launch in record numbers and the three critical skills necessary to make the transition from childhood to adulthood.
He mentions the old adage of "benign neglect" and we found this articleabout this and the author says: "I think children are just like hearty houseplants — they should be watered liberally and you should ensure they get ample sunshine. But otherwise, just let them be."
**Do we love too much?
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.**
Support us P L E A S E!
Buy us a coffee:LINK HERE (only 5 BUCKS and it means alot!)
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Follow up on our social media platforms:Facebook Instagram Twitter And remember sometimes you may have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our”) or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Listener requested! The wedding is over. Grandchildren have arrived, but now there is trouble in paradise.
Your Adult Child is Getting a Divorce. When to bite our tongues? How or when to offer advice? The wedding was such an exciting time and now the heartache begins. This episode will help you navigate the toughest situations.
Also, we are going to explore narcissism and how to identify this characteristic in your adult children or significant others.
We talk to two therapists in this episode. The first is Alena Scigliano. She is a licensed psychotherapist and an expert in narcissistic abuse. Narcissism also seems to be a trigger for divorce.
We also speak with Ashley Quamme, a marriage and family therapist based in Columbia, Georgia. She specializes in EFT - Emotionally Focused Therapy. We’d like to learn more about that, too.
We explore everything from
- How your initial response can set the tone
- How to be supportive but not overbearing
- How to recognize a narcissistic partner
- How divorcing a narcissist can impose a new can of worms
- What about the grandchildren?
And so much more... Even if divorce is not on your radar, we think you will find the discussion interesting and learning about narcissism was a real eye-opener for us!
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us P L E A S E!
Buy us a coffee:LINK HERE (only 5 BUCKS and it means alot!)
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Follow up on our social media platforms:Facebook Instagram Twitter And remember sometimes you may have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our”) or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Today we are rewinding and sharing a holiday episode we loved. We interview Jane Isay. She is the author of the book Walking on Eggshells, Navigating the Delicate Relationships between Adult Children and Parents. She is a New Yorker from birth and gets right to the point.
Have you had enough togetherness during the holidays? "Shut the door," she says.
How about when the kids come home, how to make them happy? "Give them the keys!"
And, wait until you hear what she said about her son who was Chief of Staff for Chuck Schumer's first senatorial campaign. And just as a hint - it references Al D'Amato!!!!
We hope you laugh out loud with this episode and love Jane as much as we did.
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us P L E A S E!
Buy us a coffee:LINK HERE (only 5 BUCKS and it means alot!)
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Holiday gift giving? Think about getting something from Shapermint. Lots of great items for your or those you are gifting!
Use this link and just put biteyourtongue (one word) in the CODE at checkout.
Follow up on our social media platforms:Facebook Instagram Twitter And remember sometimes you may have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our”) or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Don't Bite Your Tongue -- that is what today's guest says! "Silence does not build intimacy." Today Denise and Ellen interview Dr. Ruth Nemzoff, the author of the book "Don't Bite Your Tongue: How to Foster Rewarding Relationships with your Adult Family."
Dr. Nemzoff claims it is better not to bite your tongue. Bringing up important topics builds intimacy, but there is a right and a wrong way to do it. And she gives us the scoop.
We discuss how to feel confident raising issues of importance, as well as saying "good-bye" to our fantasies and "hello" to reality.
We also talk about short and long visits with our adult kids -- how to handle it, how long is too long and more! Perfect for the holidays!
She's a breath of fresh air, a brilliant woman that has walked the walk who provides us with a pathway to follow.
Some things we talk about:
- Learning the tools to keep talking - so they will listen
- Figuring out our relevance as parents to adult children - no longer in charge
- How to feel confident raising issues of importance
- We cannot be close to our children if we don't communicate the things that are important
- Letting go is not the solution!
- Goodbye to fantasy and hello to reality - let go of your dreams
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher - our audio engineer!
Support us P L E A S E!
Buy us a coffee:LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE Follow up on our social media platforms:Facebook Instagram Twitter And remember sometimes you may have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
The information provided by Bite Your Tongue The Podcast (“we,” “us,” or “our”) or biteyourtonguepodcast.com (the “Site” and our mobile application is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE or on the Podcast is for general informational purposes only. All information on the SITE and PODCAST is provided in good faith, however we make no representation or warranty of any kind, expressed, or implied regarding the accuracy, adequacy, validity, reliability, availability or completeness of any information the SITE or the PODCAST. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHALL WE HAVE ANY LIABILITY TO YOU FOR ANY LOSS OR DAMAGE OF ANY KIND INCURRED AS A RESULT OF THE USE OF THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY GUESTS ON OUR PODCAST. YOUR USE OF THE SITE AND PODCAST AND YOUR RELIANCE ON ANY INFORMATION FROM THE SITE OUR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
The site and podcast do not contain any medical/health information or advice. The medical/health information is for general information and educational purposes only and is not suitable for professional device. Accordingly, before taking any actions based upon such information, we encourage you to consult with the appropriate professionals. We do not provide any kind of medical/health advice. THE USE OF OR RELIANCE OF ANY INFORMATION CONTAINED ON THE SITE OR PODCAST IS SOLEY AT YOUR OWN RISK.
Today Ellen and Denise are talking to Ellie and Carrie Monahan. They are sisters and as some of you might know they are the daughters of Katie Couric, an American journalist and author.
They just started a podcast and I listen to every Friday when they drop episodes. The title is: “All Each Other Has.” We love listening to the voices of these young adults - Ellie (a millennial ) and Carrie (on the Gen Z cusp). They analyze all kinds of topics, but today we talk to them about a couple of things.
- The first SIBLING RELATIONSHIPS. They explain that the podcast is titled - “All Each Other Has,” because their mother always told them -- “Be nice to each other – you are all each other has.”
And as parents of adult children, we all want our children to be close to their siblings because as they say: "you are all each other has."
They tell us their journey to being close (it was not always that way) and the role the death of their father Jay Monahan , who died when Ellie was five and Carrie was two-year-old.
Also the week before the interview, their mother announced that she had been diagnosed with breast cancer. She is doing well but we talk a bit about this and what it means to adult children when your parents share this type of news.
We also discuss how it feels to add a stepfather into your life as a young adult. They give some good advice on how to break the "marriage" news to your young adult children and what it is like to have your single parent dating!
We ask some general questions about adult children and their feelings toward key topics of interest to parents.
They are very bright insightful young women. We think you will like this.
We also share the news of Ellen's new book coming in March - but now available on pre-order from Amazon. The book, Bright Kids Who Couldn't Care Less, though written with a child in mind, translates to the young adult who is so bright and capable but just cannot seem to launch. We are going to talk about this in an upcoming episode.
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.Support us P L E A S E!Buy us a coffee:LINK HEREBuy a mug: LINK HEREGreat Deal for Listeners!Denise's favorite shape-wear company. Denise particularly LOVES their best selling Truekind Daily Comfort Wireless Bra. "It holds youCatalyst 360: Health, Wellness & Performance!
Your trusted source for engaging, evidence-based health, wellness & performance insights!!
Listen on: Apple Podcasts Spotify
Follow up on our social media platforms
And remember - sometimes you might just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Adult step children - so many different variations. Today you will hear from a step-parenting author and expert and -- to round things out -- some adult step children.
Our guest says: "I think being a step-parent is one of the hardest jobs in the world and it is also one of the biggest challenges to personal growth."
Denise speaks with Nancy Landrum, the author of the book “STEPPING TWOGETHER.” Stepping TwoGether is part instruction, part information, part stories and part workbook.
In addition to having an MA in Psychology, Nancy has lived this journey with her late- husband and their five children. After years of working together her family has thrived. In fact, they designed a curriculum for stepfamilies and have shared and taught their strategies throughout California.
She talks about how step-parenting gets very complicated as the stepchildren grow to become adults and if you re-marry late in life and now you are a stepparent to adult children.
So many variations and we discuss it all.
A little push for Ellen's new book - Ellen's new book coming in March - but now available on pre-order from Amazon. The book, Bright Kids Who Couldn't Care Less, though written with a child in mind, translates to the young adult who is so bright and capable but just cannot seem to launch. We are going to talk about this in an upcoming episode. We are so proud of her!
Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us P L E A S E!
Buy us a coffee:LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Great Deal for Listeners!
Denise's favorite shape-wear company. Denise particularly LOVES their best selling Truekind Daily Comfort Wireless Bra. "It holds you up and is so comfortable. I am hooked - truly," says Denise. Use this link and just put biteyourtongue (one word) in the CODE at checkout.
Follow up on our social media platforms
And remember - sometimes you might just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
What is the biggest regret of most parents today?
Our guest today, one of the foremost experts who studies how individuals and families develop and change throughout their lives, tells us that as we age, we regret not reconciling with family members we may be estranged or distant from.
Today we welcome Dr. Karl Pillemer, Professor of Human Development at Cornell University, where he is also a faculty member in Cornell’s medical school. He is the author of the book: “Fault Lines, Fractured Families and How to Mend Them.” He is the author of several other remarkable books about love, relationships and aging.
We are also welcoming a guest host - Stacie Lavato. Stacie is a long-time listener and reached out to us after we dropped the episode on understanding LGBTQ+ with Levi Teachey and Stacey Shigaya. She wrote such a heartwarming email and the two of us connected. Then, I learned that Stacy produces her own podcast called “Mindful Mama Conversations,” I listened to a few, and I liked her topics and her style, so I asked her to join me.
The biggest “ah ha” moment for Stacie and I is when Dr. Pillemar mentioned “intergenerational stake.” We both had never heard of this - but it makes perfect sense. It is the generational bias in parents' and adult children's perceptions of their joint relationship. He takes it a step further and lets us know why any difficulties in our relationships with our adult children will bother us much more than the adult children.
We address such questions as: How do rifts begin? What makes estrangement so painful? Why is it so often triggered by a single event? Are you ready to reconcile? How can you overcome past hurts to build a new future with a relative? Thanks so much to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us P L E A S E!
Buy us a coffee:LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Great Deal for Listeners!
Denise's favorite shape-wear company. Denise particularly LOVES their best selling Truekind Daily Comfort Wireless Bra. "It holds you up and is so comfortable. I am hooked - truly," says Denise. Use this link and just put biteyourtongue (one word) in the CODE at checkout.
Follow up on our social media platforms
And remember - sometimes you might just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!...
We made you wait for this one! Why you may have trouble sleeping as you age and what you can do about.
Do you happen to know what the "on-off" switch for sleep is in your brain? We did not. But now we do. Listen now to learn more about your sleep and how to make it better!
As you know in our last episode we interviewed a young researcher Mark Czeisler who was part of the COPE Initiative dealing with young adults and COVID. If you missed this episode, here is a link.
While doing research on Mark we realized that he has significant experience in the study of sleep! We got excited. We know very few people our age who do not have some sleep issues! (his credentials are below)
So, although this has very little to do with building healthy relationships with our young adult children, we thought this would be a great benefit to our listeners.
We talk about:
- Why we are waking up in the middle of the night and not able to fall back to sleep
- The myth of needing less sleep as we age
- The science behind sleep
- What heredity might have to do with sleep
- His father's role as the Director of the Sleep Medicine at Harvard Medical School and how that translate to their family's sleep habits!
- The role of Melatonin and how we are all using it completely wrong!
- Sleep meds to consider or not
- Do sleep studies or doctors make a difference and when might you need one
- Tips for changing it all - and a lot of it has to do with that darn "blue light"
Credentials:
Mark, in addition to being a graduate student researching at the School of Psychological Sciences in the Faculty of Medicine at Monash University, he is also an Honorary Research Fellow at the Institute for Breathing and Sleep (IBAS) at Austin Health.
He received his Bachelor of Arts in Neurobiology with a minor in Global Health and Health Policy from Harvard College.
Currently, he is a member of the Lichtman Lab, part of the Harvard Brain Science Initiative and is studying sleep physiology.
And the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
Mark’s father, Charles Czeisler, PHD MD, is a Professor of Sleep Medicine, Professor of Medicine and Director of the Division of Sleep Medicine at Harvard Medical School and Chief of the Division of Sleep and Circadian Disorders in the Departments of Medicine and Neurology at Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston.
Thanks again to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us:
Buy us a coffee: LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Some deals for listeners:
Shapermint.com
Denise's favorite shape-wear company. Denise particularly LOVES their best selling Truekind Daily Comfort Wireless Bra. "It holds you up and is so comfortable. I am hooked - truly," says Denise. Use this link and just put biteyourtongue (one word) in the CODE at checkout.
Please stay engaged. Let us know how you like the episodes and also l
This is such an important episode and one that we hope all listeners will enjoy this second time around.
For parents of adult children, mental health disease is one of our most frightening thoughts. We are hoping this episode will help us understand, support and accept this disease.
This is a fabulous episode. Today we speak with Dr. Elizabeth Cookson (Beth) a psychiatrist who has over 35 years of experience. A former president of the Colorado Psychiatric Society, she is Board Certified in General and Addiction Psychiatry. She has dealt with children and adults of all ages in public psychiatric settings.
She is here so that all of us have a better understanding of mental health for both ourselves and our adult children. For over 15 years she worked as the Director of Psychiatry for the Colorado Coalition for Homeless.
Beth explains in laymen terms for all of us the stages of mental health disease, when to look for signs and how to help your child you suspect may be suffering. We cover so many topics.
We loved this episode and feel like Beth was a rockstar interviewee. Here are links to the resources that Beth mentions in the episode:
- I'm Not Sick I Don't Need Help, by Xavier Amador, is the source of the LEAP approach (Listen - Empathize - Agree - Partner). More specifics can be found here.
- The Mental Health Parity and Addiction Equity Act - passed in 2008, went into effect 7/1/14.
- The heritability statistics I Beth referred to are from REthink. She says that their website has some of the clearest info and advice for families that she has seen.
- This blog by a therapist is Washington State has specifics about ways to access CRAFT
- The Gardener and the Carpenter by Alison Gopnik
Thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Visit our website at www.biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Support us:
Buy us a coffee: LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Some deals for listeners:
Denise's favorite shape-wear company. Denise particularly LOVES their best selling Truekind Daily Comfort Wireless Bra. "It holds you up and is so comfortable. I am hooked - truly," says Denise. Use this link and just put biteyourtongue (one word) in the CODE at checkout.
Please stay engaged. Let us know how you like the episodes and also let us know what topics you'd like us to explore.
And remember - sometimes you might just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Another listener favorite. So many listeners wrote about how they put Dr. Heitler's suggestions to good use!
Join us for a conversation with Dr. Susan Heitler, a renowned relationship therapist. She is best known for clarifying the basics of collaborative dialogue and provides wonderful techniques to use - not only with your adult children but for all of the relationships in your life you value.You will take away real tools, words and actions to develop meaningful relationships. This is a must listen. Take your time, take notes and share with others you love.
Dr. Heitler appeared on the CBS Early Show where anchor Harry Smith introduced her as “the most influential person in my life—my therapist.” He encouraged his viewers similarly to seek therapy when they feel distressed and to check out pre-marital counseling before they wed.
Some links you will enjoy:
- Dr. Heitler's Website therapyhelp.com
- Dr. Heitler's Tedx Talk
- Psychology Today (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/contributors/susan-heitler-phd)
- Power of Two (https://www.poweroftwomarriage.com/)
- This is from Modern Love: The Podcast. We thought it was appropriate for the advice Dr. Heitler gave us: "Shamu and a Happy Marriage." (https://www.nytimes.com/2019/10/11/style/modern-love-what-shamu-taught-me-happy-marriage.html)
Thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us:
Buy us a coffee: LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Some deals for listeners:
Denise's favorite shape-wear company. Denise particularly LOVES their best selling Truekind Daily Comfort Wireless Bra. "It holds you up and is so comfortable. I am hooked - truly," says Denise. Use this link and just put biteyourtongue (one word) in the CODE at checkout.
Please stay engaged. Let us know how you like the episodes and also let us know what topics you'd like us to explore.
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
And remember - sometimes you might just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
This is the episode we've gotten the most mail about! Listeners loved it!
Today Ellen and Denise welcome Tess Brigham, a licensed psychotherapist, life coach and former twenty-something. In a recent article from CNBC Tess says: “Over a decade ago, when I first became a therapist, I never expected that five years later, my practice would consist of nearly 90% millennials, with the rest of my patients being parents of millennials.” So she’s got both sides of the story for us.
Tess has been featured in major media throughout the US - from the New York Times to O Magazine. So, we are pretty excited to have her with us today.
In that recent CNBC article, she says that the number one complaint parents have about their adult kids is money. With that lead, we thought we’d challenge Tess with helping us with constructive strategies for the TOP 10 issues between adult kids and their parents.
Listen to hear what she says. We talk about:
- How she became a millennial therapist
- Social Media: Keeping up with the Jones'
- How are millennials different from our generation
- What is it about this generation that no other generation has experienced before?
- Why is this stage of emerging adults so difficult?
Tess Brigham Coaching
YouTube Channel - lots of tips and tricks
Support us:
Buy us a coffee: LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Some deals for listeners:
Denise's favorite shape-wear company. Denise particularly LOVES their best selling Truekind Daily Comfort Wireless Bra. "It holds you up and is so comfortable. I am hooked - truly," says Denise. Use this link and just put biteyourtongue (one word) in the CODE at checkout.
Please stay engaged. Let us know how you like the episodes and also let us know what topics you'd like us to explore.
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
And remember - sometimes you might just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
This is one funny episode. That's why we are doing a special EPISODE REWIND.
Today we interview Susan Engel, a professor of psychology at Williams College and the author of the New York Times Article: When They're Grown, The Real Pain Begins.
Joining Denise as co-host is a dear friend Val Haller. Val is the mother of four boys, very similar to the ages of Susan's boys when she wrote this article so she is our perfect co-host. (more about Val at the end)
Susan tells us that this article still gets very much attention and you can see this by just looking at the over 500 comments and the angst and of course love in so many of them.
One of the lines in her NYT story that resonated with us was a quote from a neighbor when she brought her first baby home at a few months old -- "“When they’re little they sit on your lap; when they’re big they sit on your heart.”
Susan takes us through her journey when she wrote the article in 2012 and her three boys were 28, 25 and 19. Today, ten years later, she is a grandmother with two of these three boys married and living right next door. Can you imagine?
About Val Haller - our co-host:
Val lives in Chicago and is passionate about music. She is the founder/CEO of the music website Valslist.com. She launched it about 10 years ago (when her nest was empty) and it is the first music site specifically created to help busy adults keep up with new music. Check it out
Thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us:
Buy us a coffee: LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Some deals for listeners:
Denise's favorite shape-wear company. Denise particularly LOVES their best selling Truekind Daily Comfort Wireless Bra. "It holds you up and is so comfortable. I am hooked - truly," says Denise. Use this link and just put biteyourtongue (one word) in the CODE at checkout.
Please stay engaged. Let us know how you like the episodes and also let us know what topics you'd like us to explore.
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
The emerging adult - now recognized as “the third stage of life.”
Our guest today says that studying the emerging adult years (about age 19-29) is much like studying the preschool years — the preschool years set the stage for the teen years, and the emerging adult years set the stage for the future adulthood.
Today we talk with Dr. Larry Nelson, one of the world’s leading researchers on the emerging adult years. Dr. Nelson is the president of the Study of Emerging Adulthood (SSEA) and examines factors that contribute to flourishing or floundering during this time. He has published over 70 peer-reviewed journal articles and chapters in edited books on topics including conceptions of adulthood, social withdrawal, and the role of parents and culture in the transition to adulthood.
Here are some things you will learn from today’s episode:
- Why is this period of life critical to setting the stage for the adult years?
- What role do parents play during this stage of life?
- What are the signals for the flourishing and/or floundering young adult?
- Why our generation might not have done it “right.”
- How this stage of life is dealt with in many other parts of the world, and how we can learn from them.
…and more
To learn more about the emerging adult and Dr. Nelson, here are some informative links: - Society for the Study of Emerging Adulthood
- Flourishing in Emerging Adulthood, book by Dr. Nelson
- Distinguishing Features of Emerging Adulthood: The Role of Self-Classification as an Adult
We are anxious to hear your thoughts once you have listened to the episode.
Thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us:
Buy us a coffee: LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Some deals for listeners:
Denise's favorite shape-wear company. Denise particularly LOVES their best selling Truekind Daily Comfort Wireless Bra. "It holds you up and is so comfortable. I am hooked - truly," says Denise. Use this link and just put biteyourtongue (one word) in the CODE at checkout.
Please stay engaged. Let us know how you like the episodes and also let us know what topics you'd like us to explore.
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
And remember - sometimes you might just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Today we talk about the COVID-19 Outbreak and the rise of anxiety and depression in young adults.
We know we are all tired of hearing and reading about COVID-19. But this article in the New York Times caught our attention: Young Adults Report Rising Levels of Anxiety and Depression in Pandemic
We reached out to the lead author of the study, Mark Czeisler, to talk more about it. Mark is actually younger than many of our adult children, but at 25 years old, he's an accomplished researcher and provided an insightful and impressive interview.
He is one of a group of scientists (four from Harvard and one from the University of Melbourne) involved in the COPE Initiative. COPE, which stands for COVID-19 Outbreak Public Evaluation Initiative, assesses public attitudes, behaviors, and beliefs related to the coronavirus disease and the pandemic. The goal is to evaluate mental and behavioral health during the pandemic.
Mark is well-spoken and takes us behind the scenes of this study, underscoring the way emerging adults have been affected -- maybe for the long-term -- by the global pandemic.
He provides suggestions on how we might support our young adult children and also shares some interesting trends in mental health programs, both at the corporate and governmental levels, that were initiated by this study.
We think you will enjoy this - and it is a short one!
Thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us:
Buy us a coffee: LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Some deals for listeners:
Denise's favorite shape-wear company. Denise particularly LOVES their best selling Truekind Daily Comfort Wireless Bra. "It holds you up and is so comfortable. I am hooked - truly," says Denise. Use this link and just put biteyourtongue (one word) in the CODE at checkout.
Please stay engaged. Let us know how you like the episodes and also let us know what topics you'd like us to explore.
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
And remember - sometimes you might just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Today we speak with Kerrie Lee Brown, the author of the book My Heart, My Self: A Guide for Women Who Do Too Much.
Are you a people pleaser? Do you do too much and neglect yourself?
This episode is for you.
Does it relate to building healthy relationships with your adult children?
You bet it does.
Taking care of yourself and your health and learning to say "no," are the exact things that make us good parents - for our children at any age,
Kerrie's story spoke to us. We hope it speaks to you.
She also founded an online platform called RedLily, a bold new brand that dedicated to women who want to share their stories and support each other. Kerri believes that each of us have stories to tell.
Denise shared a special story on the RedLily platform and will share it with listeners when it goes live.
Today we are sharing Kerrie’s remarkable story that started her on a journey to helping women around the world tell their own stories and live their best lives.
Thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us:
Buy us a coffee: LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Some deals for listeners:
Denise's favorite shape-wear company. Denise particularly LOVES their best selling Truekind Daily Comfort Wireless Bra. "It holds you up and is so comfortable. I am hooked - truly," says Denise. Use this link and just put biteyourtongue (one word) in the CODE at checkout.
Please stay engaged. Let us know how you like the episodes and also let us know what topics you'd like us to explore.
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
And remember - sometimes you might just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Happy Father's Day. We hope many father's (and even mother's) listen and take this episode to heart. It's a good one!
This episode is very special. Not only do we interview an amazing therapist with a special interest in father/son relationships, we hear from many young adults on their father's role in their young adult life.
Today, we welcome Dr. Deryl Goldenberg. We learned about him when we saw an article he wrote called: “The Psychology Behind Strained Father and Son Relationships.” With many years of working with men in therapy, the issues that come up with careers or relationships can often be traced back to their lack of a relationship with their fathers.
Goldenberg is a licensed clinical psychologist with over 30 years in private practice. He is also the Executive Director of the Verdugo Hills Autism Project, a non-public agency providing intervention services to children with emotional and developmental disorders.
Today, in honor of Father’s Day we want to talk about the father’s role in the life of the emerging adult child. We tend to focus so much on mothers, and the father is behind the curtain or many times silent.
We talk about so many things and his thoughtful answers can apply to nearly any relationship in our lives. To become a surgeon, carpenter or teacher takes time, practice and work, he says - but so do relationships.
For a strong relationship to develop a father has to be interested in really knowing their child - whatever their life choices. This reminded us a bit about our conversation with Rosjke Hasseldine, when she spoke about "understanding" one another. You do not have to agree, but work to understand. If you missed it, here is a link to that episode.
We talk about anger, finance and generosity, relationships and so much more.
This is a thoughtful and helpful interview. Don't miss it.
Thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher, our audio engineer.
Support us:
Buy us a coffee: LINK HERE
Buy a mug: LINK HERE
Some deals for listeners:
Denise's favorite shape-wear company. Denise particularly LOVES their best selling Truekind Daily Comfort Wireless Bra. "It holds you up and is so comfortable. I am hooked - truly," says Denise. Use this link and just put biteyourtongue (one word) in the CODE at checkout.
Please stay engaged. Let us know how you like the episodes and also let us know what topics you'd like us to explore.
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
And remember - sometimes you might just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
We sharing our LGBTQ+ episode that we dropped in Season I for Pride Month. It remains one of our favorite episodes.
We hope you will listen.
Here are the episode notes from the earlier episode:
Every time I listen to an episode, I think to myself, "everyone needs to listen to this. There are so many valuable nuggets of information for all of us in every episode."
For this episode - I plead with everyone to listen and share it.
Many of us think we are progressive and accepting, but to step into someone's shoes helps us learn so much more. This episode is NOT JUST FOR PARENTS of LGBTQ+ children, but for ALL OF US. Let me know what you think.
Today I speak with Levi Teachey, who is the Board President of PFLAG Denver,and Stacey Shigaya, who is the organization's Board Secretary.
Levi shares his very personal journey as a trans man and Stacey shares her journey both as an ally within the LGBTQ+ community and with her daughter who is pansexual.
We discuss both their stories and the rapidly changing landscape of this community. Planned Parenthood writes: "Understanding the words, and the labels people use encourages respect and understanding."
Please share the episode with friends and family who you think might benefit.
Stacey and Levi also shared these documents which I found very helpful:
Glossary of Terms (https://pflag.org/glossary)
Faith FAQs (https://pflag.org/faithfaq)
Becoming a Trans Ally 101 (https://pflag.org/transally101recording)
Finally, Levi ends each of his emails with this phrase -- "courage, kindness and lasting change," -- keep it handy!
PFLAG is a national organization founded in 1972 by Jeanne Manford, who marched with her son, in a gay pride parade in New York, with a sign that read: "Parents of Gays Unite." It has become one of the most important organizations building support for friends and families of the LGBTQ+ community.
Gender Revolution: A Journey with Katie Couric
Finally, please remember to subscribe to this podcast, give us a review and follow us on all of our social media platforms:
And PLEASE reach out to us by email with any suggestions for guests or episode ideas that YOU want see covered: Email: Biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Finally, remember there are just sometimes you have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Until next time - keep on listening!
Hello everyone and welcome to another episode of BITE YOUR TONGUE: The Podcast.
You asked for it! This is another episode that answers a listener question!
But before we start - think about supporting the podcast and buy us a coffee. That's all it takes. CLICK HERE TO BUY US A COFFEE.
This is a quick a very quick refresher course on understanding the LGBTQ+ pronouns and language
About a year ago we had of our most emotional episodes about understanding LGBTQ+ with Levi Teachey, President of P-Flag Denver and Stacy Shigaway, a parent of a pansexual daughter.
Even since that episode things have changed. We can't seem to keep our pronouns and language straight for this ever-changing community.
Our listeners asked for a refresher and we are happy to oblige. And we found the perfect guest.
Denise was in LA recently visiting her daughter. She took a walk with a friend and a young 20-something person joined the group who identified as non-binary, using the pronoun “they.” Denise was tripping over her tongue the entire walk and finally at the end she asked they if they might join us on the podcast. They agreed and here we are.
They is concise and articulate.
Here is a link to the article we discuss: What Quakers Can Teach Us About the Politics of Pronouns. This may be from WIKI, but we found this helpful as well. Print it out and work on learning these new and important pronouns.
Don't forget our special offer from Shapermint -- Denise's favorite shape-wear company. Denise particularly LOVES their best selling Truekind Daily Comfort Wireless Bra. "It holds you up and is so comfortable. I am hooked - truly," says Denise.
If you order now using this LINK - you will get 20% off your purchase! We will get a few bucks too! So check out the website today - make sure to use our link. We really love these BRAS!!!!
Please stay engaged. Let us know how you like the episodes and also let us know what topics you'd like us to explore.
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
And remember - sometimes you might just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
We are on it! Today we are talking about mothers and daughters!
But before we start - think about supporting the podcast and buy us a coffee. That's all it takes. CLICK HERE TO BUY US A COFFEE.
And it begins with the burnt hamburger. But more about that in today’s episode. You will have to listen.
A listener wrote: Where have you been for the last 15 years? I have been searching for books, podcasts, and the internet for some real support on parenting adult children. Nothing.”
The listener proceeded to ask if we might explore more about the mother/daughter relationship and expressed some of the struggles she was having with her own adult daughters.
In her message she said that she imagined that as she and her daughter got older, they would become closer. But instead, she feels like she is biting her tongue all the time.
You asked for it - and we’re on it!
Denise and Ellen welcomed Rosjke Hasseldine, an internationally recognized mother-daughter therapist with over 20 years listening to women and girls from around the world talk about their lives and relationships.
Rosjke is the creator of the Mother-Daughter Coaching Model which uncovers and explains the hidden dynamics between mothers and daughters. She is also the author of two books - "The Silent Female Scream'' and "The Mother-Daughter Puzzle".
What started as a personal quest for Hasseldine grew quickly into her life’s calling. She says, “Despite the research on women’s development, there is a worldwide epidemic of mother-daughter conflict that is screaming to be told.”
Listening to this podcast is just the beginning. In her book, "The Mother-Daughter Puzzle"” she provides step by step instructions on how to map your mother-daughter history. Then in the following chapters she teaches you how to go about changing these destructive generational themes and beliefs.
It’s a powerful book that will help us peel back the layers and examine our mother-daughter history. Then, learn to connect the dots between what’s happening between you and your mother or daughter.
Visit Mother Daughter Coaching International for information about Hasseldine, her books, training courses, and free articles and videos.
We are anxious to get listener feedback.
**And for Mother's Day! A special offer for mother's from Shapermint -- Denise's favorite shape-wear company. Denise particularly LOVES their best selling Truekind Daily Comfort Wireless Bra. "It holds you up and is so comfortable. I am hooked - truly," says Denise.
If you order by the end of May using this LINK - you will get 20% off your purchase! We will get a few bucks too! So check out the website today - make sure to use our link. We really love these BRAS!!!!**
Today Denise and Ellen welcome Michelle Martinez, who is not only a Certified Wedding Consultant, with more than 20 years in the wedding and events industry, but also the creator and host of the world's mosts popular wedding podcast - The Big Wedding Planning Podcast. With 300 episodes under her belt and nearly three million downloads, she's been around the block a few times!
Ellen's daughter is getting married so Ellen has some inside scoop on some of her issues. Michelle helps us see the whole picture, what are role is of parents - of the bride or the groom and underscores her three missions:
- Inclusivity is key
- Perfection is a myth
- Wedding planning for all
It seems to all come back to what Julie Dolan told us in our grand-parenting episode about being the loving and loyal servant.
We talk about:
- The role of the bride and groom's family
- How the bride's family can help the groom's family feel more comfortable
- The role of the newly engaged couple
- Guest lists
- Finances
- and more
If you are in the stages of wedding planning and don't have the budget for a big time wedding planner, Michelle now offers a masterclass on her website. A tiny percent of what a full wedding planner would cost. Check it out her Master Class offer here.
Don't forget our "AND ONE MORE THING...BITE YOUR TONGUE" MUGS! They are available on our website. Here is quick link. Help support the podcast.
Please stay engaged. We can't thank listeners enough for their feedback and suggestions on topics to explore. Let us know how you like the episodes and also let us know what topics you'd like us to explore. Write us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all on social media and leave some comments - we love them!
If you have ideas for future episodes, please email us at biteyourtonguepodcast.com.
Thanks to Connie Gorant Fisher our audio engineer and remember - SOMETIMES YOU MAY JUST HAVE TO BITE YOUR TONGUE!
You asked for it!
This episode is dedicated to the often-complicated relationship with mothers-in-laws and their daughter-in-laws.
If you’ve ever felt slighted or wanted more connection than the other is willing to give - this is the episode for you!
For several months listeners have asked us to find someone who could talk to us about the mother-in-law, daughter-in-law dynamic. So many layers to all of this. We did some searching and this episode features our interview with Dr. Deanna Brann. Dr. Deanna, as she likes to be called, is a licensed clinical psychotherapist and is a leading expert in the area of mother-in-law/daughter-in-law relationships. She works with women involved in this pivotal yet particularly challenging relationship, and has helped women nationwide to restore hope and bring healing to their families.
She is the author of the popular book, Reluctantly Related: Breaking Free of the Mother-in-Law/Daughter-in Law Conflict.
What you will love about the book and her website is that there are questionnaires to help you identify your personality type as well as your daughter-in-law's. Then she provides steps to help you improve or enhance your relationship.
She provides great insight for all of you who are mother-in-laws to first look inside yourself. Examine what YOU may be contributing. Take the highroad.
You may also enjoy some of the information on her YOUTUBE channel.
Please stay engaged. We can't thank listeners enough for their feedback and suggestions on topics to explore. Let us know how you like the episodes and also let us know what topics you'd like us to explore.
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
And remember - sometimes you might just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Today Ellen and Denise welcome Tess Brigham, a licensed psychotherapist, life coach and former twenty-something. In a recent article from CNBC Tess says: “Over a decade ago, when I first became a therapist, I never expected that five years later, my practice would consist of nearly 90% millennials, with the rest of my patients being parents of millennials.” So she’s got both sides of the story for us.
Tess has been featured in major media throughout the US - from the New York Times to O Magazine. So, we are pretty excited to have her with us today.
In that recent CNBC article, she says that the number one complaint parents have about their adult kids is money. With that lead, we thought we’d challenge Tess with helping us with constructive strategies for the TOP 10 issues between adult kids and their parents.
Listen to hear what she says. We talk about:
- How she became a millennial therapist
- Social Media: Keeping up with the Jones'
- How are millennials different from our generation
- What is it about this generation that no other generation has experienced before?
- Why is this stage of emerging adults so difficult?
Tess Brigham Coaching
YouTube Channel - lots of tips and tricks
This is a fun episode. Today Denise interviews Stanford grads and Brooklyn comedians Carolyn Doyle and Emily Kop.
Always wanting to understand and relate to the younger generation, we found these two 20-somethings by listening to their podcast called OKAY STUPID. While listening Denise found herself gasping as they spoke so personally about their lives - including their sex lives.
We wanted to learn more - about them, their podcast, their relationship with their parents and of course, their generation.
Caroline grew up in San Francisco and has performed stand-up in Chicago, Berlin, the Bay Area and New York, as well as at comedy festivals like SF Sketchfest, the DC Comedy Festival, and Big Little Comedy Fest. She's also a contributor to Reductress and McSweeney’s. I learned after the interview that she is also a mechanical engineer!
Emily Kop, also from California, has a lower profile but also performs regularly with Caroline and you can follow her on INSTAGRAM.
They've been best friends since their freshman year at Stanford.
It's a lively conversation about all of these things and more...and a chance to meet these two incredible young women who are following unique paths in life.
You can see them perform regularly at Union Hall in Brooklyn. Their next show is April 30 and here is a link with information and how to purchase tickets.
Please stay engaged. Let us know how you like the episodes and also let us know what topics you'd like us to explore.
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
And remember - sometimes you might just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Ellen joins Denise in today's episode as we chat with Julia Pimsluer. Denise actually met Julia in a coffee shop in New York and the two began to chat.
Denise opens the episode with the information that Empty Nest is actually a real "syndrome." In fact on the Mayo Clinic site, it says "If your last child is about to leave home and you're worried about empty nest syndrome, plan ahead. Look for new opportunities in your personal and professional life."
So in today's episode that is what we are talking about. Building Your Own Life - After the Empty Nest.
Julia is a scaling couch, speaker and best-selling author. She is founder of Million Dollar Women, a New York-based social venture, which has helped thousands of women entrepreneurs scale their businesses. Prior to that, she founded and built Little Pim, a language learning program for young children, into a million-dollar company.
We discuss that we are not all looking to build million dollar businesses, but we are all looking for the confidence to build our lives. Julia discusses tools for all of us to start working on our mindset to inspire us to do all that we can do.
At the end of the episode she provides two exercises for us. We hope listeners will give them a try. And also, she's offering our listeners 50% off her program 21 Days to Go Big Mindset. It is 21 days of journal prompts to help us build our best lives. The program is typically $49, so with 50% off, it's worth trying! USE THE CODE: GOBIG50.
Here are some of Julia's book recommendations:
GO Big Now, Julia Pimsluer
Finding Your Own North Star, by Martha Beck
The Power of Regret, Daniel Pink (How Looking Backward Moves Us Forward)
"The Power of Regret shows how we can live richer, more engaged lives."
Please stay engaged. Let us know how you like the episodes and also let us know what topics you'd like us to explore.
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
And remember - sometimes you might just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Today Ellen and Denise interviewed Judith Smith, the author of a new book called: Difficult: Mothering Challenging Adult Children through Conflict and Change.
Judith is a leader in gerontological research focusing on women’s experiences as they age. She is a senior clinical social worker, therapist, and professor at Fordham University. She lives in New York City.
Difficult focuses on adult children and takes the unique perspective of the mother. I struggled reading this book and felt such compassion for these mothers and the sacrifices they made.
Judith wrote the book because she discovered that there was very little written about parenting adult children and in particular for these mothers who were saddled with very difficult situations.
Judith is writing about a particular set of mothers. Mothers truly who have difficult adult children.
She talks about her hope that using the words, "difficult adult child" will help others understand and be supportive. She says that 80 percent of all children are being raised in a single family home and the person carrying most of the weight is the mother. That is changing, but not by much.
Societal problems are also contributing to this issue. A broken mental health system. Not enough psychiatric beds, we do not have sufficient substance abuse care that is affordable and accessible. The homeless problem is connected to the mental health.
Also fascinating is what she learned during this research about elder abuse. The most likely perpetrator is the adult child who is mentally ill or has a substance abuse problem and is living at home.
She offers some great advice on how to help mothers struggling with difficult adult children and the small steps mothers can use to help themselves and be heard.
There are no magical answers but she pushed herself to think about this and offers some tools both on the episode and in the book.
Judith urges listeners to stay in touch by emailing her at judithsmith@difficultmothering.com and check out her website at difficultmothering.com.
Here final hope is that this book will help these mothers not feel alone.
Some links:
JASA
Book: Torn in Two
Prochaska and DiClemte's Stages of Change
Alanon
Please stay engaged. Let us know how you like the episodes and also let us know what topics you'd like us to explore.
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
And remember - sometimes you might just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
This is one funny episode.
Today we interview Susan Engel, a professor of psychology at Williams College and the author of the New York Times Article: When They're Grown, The Real Pain Begins.
Joining Denise as co-host is a dear friend Val Haller. Val is the mother of four boys, very similar to the ages of Susan's boys when she wrote this article so she is our perfect co-host. (more about Val at the end)
Susan tells us that this article still gets very much attention and you can see this by just looking at the over 500 comments and the angst and of course love in so many of them.
One of the lines in her NYT story that resonated with us was a quote from a neighbor when she brought her first baby home at a few months old -- "“When they’re little they sit on your lap; when they’re big they sit on your heart.”
Susan takes us through her journey when she wrote the article in 2012 and her three boys were 28, 25 and 19. Today, ten years later, she is a grandmother with two of these three boys married and living right next door. Can you imagine?
She tells us:
- Why your ego might be important. We are all human and your ego will be involved.
- How to deal with the daughters-in-laws and what happens when you do not like your adult child's significant other?
- Child rearing wisdom and social media
- Asking for what we want
- Why we think we are subtle - but really we are not and maybe it is best to just say it - take it or leave it.
- Bickering - hear what she has to say!
- And listen to find out why there are many times she heads to the kitchen to stir her soup.
About Val Haller - our co-host:
Val lives in Chicago and is passionate about music. She is the founder/CEO of the music website Valslist.com. She launched it about 10 years ago (when her nest was empty) and it is the first music site specifically created to help busy adults keep up with new music. Check it out.
Let us know what you thought of the episode. Read some of the comments from the New York Times Article: When They're Grown, The Real Pain Begins.
Check out our website at www.biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.
And please reach out to us by email with any suggestions for guests or episode ideas that YOU want see covered: Email: Biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.
And remember - sometimes you may just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE........
WE ARE ON IT! Answering YOUR Questions!
Today's Question:
How do you handle a situation where your adult child is participating in what you believe is dangerous behavior?
- They are not getting the COVID Vaccine
- You suspect they are drinking too much
- You recognize an abusive relationship
These are just a few of the topics we discuss with two experts. The first you may remember from a previous episode (TALK THE TALK) with Dr. Susan Heitler, a renowned relationship therapist. She is best known for clarifying the basics of collaborative dialogue and provides wonderful techniques to use - not only with your adult children but for all of the relationships in your life you value.Dr. Heitler's WebsiteWe do some "role playing" and she helps us with the right words, right tone and right attitude to approach our adult children on these difficult subjects.
**VACCINE HESITANCY
Special course offering by our guest: COVID Vaccine Ambassador Training**. Don't miss it.
And because COVID-19 is such a central topic and concern these days, we also spoke with Rupali J. Limaye, PhD, MPH, MA who serves as a full-time faculty member with Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health. She is a leading researcher in vaccine demand; vaccine hesitancy; vaccine acceptance; health behavior change; infectious diseases.
In her work she has interviewed thousands of vaccine hesitant people and believes
that vaccine hesitancy comes down to one word: TRUST. She says: "It’s really important for all of us to keep empathy front and center and to not be dismissive. A lot of people just need to talk it out and have a longer conversation."
Below are links to some further reading and interviews with Limaye:
The Antidote to Vaccine Hesitancy
Joan Lunden Interviews Limaye on Vaccine Hesitancy
We hope you enjoy the first of many WE ARE ON IT! Please send us your questions to: biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com. We will get on it!
Finally, please remember to subscribe to this podcast, give us a review and follow us on all of our social media platforms and of course all of our episodes are available on our website. (https://bite-your-tongue-the-podcast-1.podsite.io/)
And PLEASE reach out to us by email with any suggestions for guests or episode ideas that YOU want see covered: Email: Biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Finally, remember there are just sometimes you have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Until next time - keep on listening!
The parent I hope to be. The Children I hope to raise.
We believe that this episode will change everything you think ever thought about parenting.
This is one of the most personal interviews we've done. Our vulnerability in raising our own adult children is challenged.
On this week's episode we speak with Einat Nathan, parenting expert and best selling author.
We talk to her about her recent book, My Everything, was released in Israel in 2018 and become a national bestseller. The book was translated into English and is now one of the #1 non-fiction books selling on Amazon.
Einat Nathan is a parenting expert, public speaker and bestselling author, certified by the Adler Institute and the Ministry of Education for Parental Instruction and Group Instruction. She also holds a bachelor’s degree in law from Tel Aviv University.
In recent years she has begun to work the experience, insights and knowledge accumulated into a significant breadth of work in the media, including TV morning talk shows and radio, a hit podcast (with Hila Korach), and a popular columns on major newspapers and website.
Her approach is relationship focused. She says: "“I believe that parenthood is like a bungee jump. It’s scary and fun, it makes you fly and often lets you down. This book isn’t so much a parenting guide as an exploration of the complex emotional journey of being a parent, reminding us of the courage and energy it requires as well as acknowledging that no parent is perfect and at the end of the day, this relationship is about connection”.
MY NAME IS EINAT AND THIS IS MY EVERYTHINGWe talk about everything from our egos, why anxiety is a misleading emotion, how to remain significant as our children grow and here are a few things she said that keeps us thinking:
- "Just as you think about a talk with a good friend, they need us curious enough, empathic enough, ready to have their back in a way that won't burden them with 'Oh God, I've ruined by mom's day' or 'She's over-identifying with me so maybe I should not tell her anything'"
- Every parent wants to be their adult child's first call when something goes wrong, but we need to earn that.
And how do we earn that? Just listen and learn.
This is one of our most personal and insightful interviews with a most inspirational guest. We hope you enjoy it.
Check out our website at www.biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.
And please reach out to us by email with any suggestions for guests or episode ideas that YOU want see covered: Email: Biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.
And remember - sometimes you may just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE........
Listeners,
Enjoy these pearls of wisdom garnered by our amazing guests this year. Thank you to our audio engineer Connie Fisher who brilliantly put this together.
We hope you will go to our website biteyourtonguepodcast.com and listen to any of the episodes you missed in the first season.
Looking forward to meeting again in 2022.
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
Today we speak with the amazing Sarah Morris, a legacy and estate planning attorney in Denver, Colorado. Sarah specializing in wills, trusts, and philanthropy. She was recommended to us by a very trusted friend and listener. When our friend gave Sarah a rating of a 10 +, we knew she was our gal.
This is a great episode to listen to with your kids or share the link so they can understand the legal documents that they need to have by the time they are 18-years-old.
This is a quick episode that gets right to the point.
Listen to hear what documents your adult kids must have at 18-years-old. Why the items are important and how they should be stored and shared. She also discusses the ever-important - digital assets.
Here is Sarah's website -- Sarah Morris Law -- if you want to speak with her more or want advice on getting started.
We hope you enjoy the episode.
If you've missed any of our episodes, just visit our website: Biteyoutonguepodcast.com and listen when you can!
One quick favor: If you liked this episode - please share with a friend - but for sure listen with your adult child -- or share the episode with them!
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
Welcome to another episode of BITE YOUR TONGUE. The is part 2 of "Holidays and your Adult Children."
Connie Fisher, our audio engineer co-hosted this episode with Denise. They are sisters and figured that they had spent a lot of time going home for the holidays! So this was a fun episode to record.
Ginny offered quite a bit of insightful observations that will get all of us to think:
- Relationships are dances - and if the parent/child relationship does not evolve (from parent/child to adult/adult) -- we just keep dancing the same dance.
- She gives us some great advice on how we, as parents can work on our dance and in turn, help the relationship to evolve.
- She explains that criticism and judgement come from fear. We may not think we are showing our fear, but our adult kids feel it and then.....
- Active listening - you will hear what she says about this!
- Ginny also has a specialty in eating disorders and she shares some interesting thoughts about food and the one thing not to do if you think your child has a weight issue.
We don't want to give the whole episode away, but urge you to listen and really think about Ginny's advice and ideas.
Many things she says are different from anything you've heard before - and frankly - it really starts us YOU......
A thoughtful and insightful episode we think you will love.
Here is a link to Ginny's article: "Why Adult Kids Don't Come Home for the Holidays."
Once you listen to the episode you will understand why Ginny shares Self-Compassion by Kristin Neff. Things you can do right now to prepare yourself for the holidays and onward.
She also shared some active listening resources:
- The Skill of Listening
- Boston University: Active Listening
- Listen Non-Defensively
And finally a resource on "How to Talk about Food and Body and Body Issues."
Check out our website at www.biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.
And please reach out to us by email with any suggestions for guests or episode ideas that YOU want see covered: Email: Biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Thanks for listening and enjoy the holiday season!
This is part I of our double whammy holiday episodes. Part 2 will drop on Friday - that's only two days from now.
Today we speak with Jane Isay.
She is the author of the book Walking on Eggshells, Navigating the Delicate Relationships between Adult Children and Parents.
She is a New Yorker from birth and gets right to the point.
Have you had enough togetherness during the holidays? "Shut the door," she says.
How about when the kids come home, how to make them happy? "Give them the keys!"
And, wait until you hear what she said about her son who was Chief of Staff for Chuck Schumer's first senatorial campaign. And just as a hint - it references Al D'Amato!!!!
But there is lots more.
Jane's bio is extraordinary. She's been an editor for over forty years. She discovered Mary Pipher’s Reviving Ophelia, commissioned Patricia O’Connor’s bestselling Woe Is I and Rachel Simmons’ s Odd Girl Out, and edited such nonfiction classics as Praying for Sheetrock and Friday Night Lights. And of course she's written several books of her own, including Walking on Eggshells and her latest Unconditional Love.
Jane's son is Dave Isay, the founder of StoryCorps. Here is a link to an interview for TED Talks he did with his mother.
We hope you laugh out loud with this episode and love Jane as much as we did.
Look for Season I Episode 16 Part 2 - to drop this Friday!
Check out our website at www.biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.
And please reach out to us by email with any suggestions for guests or episode ideas that YOU want to see covered: Email: Biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Thanks for listening! Happy Holidays!
Today we speak with Jane Adams, PhD and author of the book, When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us, Letting Go of Their Problems, Loving them Anyways and Getting on with Our Lives."
In addition to being an author (of several books) , Jane is a "post-parent" coach. And that is what our podcast is all about. She also has a blog that she updates regularly on Psychology Today. Our dreams for our children begin as soon as they are placed in our arms - "give them a chance to grow up" Jane says, "before you make a judgement."
She writes on her website:
"Being a parent doesn’t end – it lasts as long as you do. I’m a social psychologist who’s been studying how we handle our kids’ transitions from youth to adulthood – on time, late or still not there yet. From Sex and the Single Parent to I’m Still Your Mother and When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us, I’ve been interviewing, researching and coaching parents who want their grown kids to be happy and successful in life but want a mutual, loving and authentic relationship with them even more.
Whether you’re a baby boomer or a GenX er, if your kids have moved out or boomeranged back in, and even if the ties that bind are frayed and worn, they’re still what keeps you together."And that's what we talk about today. Here are some of the topics we cover - but there is a whole lot more!
- Are we entitled to reasonable expectations of our kids?
- Why we feel guilty about being disappointed. It is not about us - it is about them.
- How can we not worry when we watch a child drop out of school, live on the edge with no real goals for the future?
- Whose story is it anyway? When they mess up, is it really about us?
- How not to blame ourselves when things don't go as planned
- Addicted, depressed or dependent - detour or final destination - and when do parents give up - or can you?
- She talks about parents of adult children - they either brag or lie!
- Why these emerging adult years cause such worry? Will they be latched on to us forever - will they ever be independent.
- So, if you are disappointed - how do you let go of their problems, love them anyway and get on with your life?
Thank you again to our listeners. Check out all of Jane's books:
I'm Still Your Mother: How to Get Along with Your Grown-Up Children for the Rest of Your Life
- When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us: Letting Go of their Problems, Loving them Anyway
- Boundary Issues: Using Boundary Intelligence to the Intimacy you want and the Independence you need in Life, Love and Work
Also, here is a link to the book we spoke about in the episode: A Good Enough Parent by Bruno Bettelheim
Check out our website at www.biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.
And please reach out to us by email with any suggestions for guests or episode ideas that YOU want see covered: Email: Biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Thanks for listening!
For parents of adult children, mental health disease is one of our most frightening thoughts. We are hoping this episode will help us understand, support and accept this disease.
This is a fabulous episode. Today we speak with Dr. Elizabeth Cookson (Beth) a psychiatrist who has over 35 years of experience. A former president of the Colorado Psychiatric Society, she is Board Certified in General and Addiction Psychiatry. She has dealt with children and adults of all ages in public psychiatric settings.
She is here so that all of us have a better understanding of mental health for both ourselves and our adult children. For over 15 years she worked as the Director of Psychiatry for the Colorado Coalition for Homeless.
Beth explains in laymen terms for all of us the stages of mental health disease, when to look for signs and how to help your child you suspect may be suffering. We cover so many topics.
We loved this episode and feel like Beth was a rockstar interviewee. Here are links to the resources that Beth mentions in the episode:
- I'm Not Sick I Don't Need Help, by Xavier Amador, is the source of the LEAP approach (Listen - Empathize - Agree - Partner). More specifics can be found here.
- The Mental Health Parity and Addiction Equity Act - passed in 2008, went into effect 7/1/14.
- The heritability statistics I Beth referred to are from REthink. She says that their website has some of the clearest info and advice for families that she has seen.
- This blog by a therapist is Washington State has specifics about ways to access CRAFT
- The Gardener and the Carpenter by Alison Gopnik
Thank you again to our listeners. Let’s make a real effort to share this episode far and wide. Mental health is a topic we all should learn more about and just listening to this episode can save a life, help a family or a sufferer.
We are anxious to hear your thoughts once you have listened to the episode.
Check out our website at www.biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.
And please reach out to us by email with any suggestions for guests or episode ideas that YOU want see covered: Email: Biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Finally, remember there are just sometimes you have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Until next time - keep on listening!
Special episode with new guest host: Connie Fisher.Connie is usually behind the scenes doing our tech work, but today she joined Denise to talk to Tony and Alisa DiLorenzo. They are the hosts of the #1 marriage podcasts on Apple podcasts called One Extraordinary Marriage. Does this sound like you?
- Are you and your partner out of sync since you are no longer parenting young children?
- As your empty nest impacted your marriage?
- Do you wish for the same level of connection and intimacy you once had?
- Do you need the emotional skills to stay connected with your partner?
- Do you fear the important things are falling through the cracks?
Then this episode is for you!
We don't want to give too much away but in this episode you will hear about:
- Different Ways of Bringing Back the Magic after the Kids are Gone
- The Six Pillars of Intimacy
- The 7 (or more) day Sex Challenge
- A bit on the best lubricant for better Sex
- Connect Like the Two of Your Just Met
- What is a "walk and talk?"
Links to other mentions in the podcast:
- The Vagina Bible
- The Penis Book
- 10 Questions to Amazing Sex with Your Partner
- Tony and Alisa's Favorite Sex Toy
So we hope you enjoyed the episode and here again are some things to remember!
- Subscribe to BITE YOUR TONGUE wherever you listen. And if you like what you hear - give us a 5 Star review!
- You can listen to all our episodes, at any time, by visiting our website at www.biteyourtonguepodcast.com
- Follow up on our social media platforms
- SHARE THIS EPISODE WITH A FRIEND!
- Tell us what topics yo
Today we talk to Cameron Huddleston, an award-winning journalist who has been writing for over 20 years on personal finance. US News and World Report named her one of the top finance experts to follow on Twitter. Link to her Twitter feed.
She just released an amazing book called, “Mom and Dad, We Need to Talk.” The target for the book is our kids of course, but we switched the conversation with Cameron and called it - “Hey Adult Kids, We Need to Talk.”
Here are some of the things we discuss:
- Why it is important to have a conversation with your adult kids now about estate planning (and estate planning is not just for rich people!).
- How to broach the subjects of estate planning and end-of-life planning with your kids.
- The key legal documents that you need to have now, and how often to update them.
- Other important documents and information, including passwords, car titles, bank accounts and more. Here is a link to Cameron’s IN CASE OF EMERGENGY document - or you can also download it from her website. It could take you weeks to complete, but it is a starting point in understanding all that your adult children need to know NOW!
- Even though you are healthy and really don’t think you will die or be injured soon, why it is so very important to be prepared.
- Resources Cameron has shared for DIY planning:
- Trusts and Wills
- Carefull - Second set of eyes to watch your finances and bills as you age
- Here are a few others I found, but I am not recommending, just listing:
- FreeWill
- Suze Orman Will and Trust Kit
So we hope you enjoyed the episode and here again are some things to remember!
- Subscribe to BITE YOUR TONGUE wherever you listen. And if you like what you hear - give us a 5 Star review!
- You can listen to all our episodes, at any time, by visiting our website at www.biteyourtonguepodcast.com
- Follow up on our social media platforms
- SHARE THIS EPISODE WITH A FRIEND!
- Tell us what topics you'd like us to cover - send us an email at biteyourtongue@gmail.com
And....finally, remember there are
EPISODE NOTES
Joining us today are Nyge Turner and Merk Nguyen, the hosts of the wildly popular podcast - Adult ISH. Produced by YR Media and Radiotopia from PRX, these two young adults have become prominent voices of their generation.
This episode they discuss everything from mental health and work ethic to social media and their relationships with their parents. They also bring a bit of diversity to BITE YOUR TONGUE. Nyge is an African American and I found through some research that he always wanted to be Eddie Murphy. Merk is Vietnamese, in fact her parents immigrated to the US from Vietnam soon after 1975.
We promise that you will be delighted and entertained with these two very talented young people who hold nothing back. They help all of us get a peek into the minds of our own young adult children.
Some things to remember:
- Subscribe to BITE YOUR TONGUE wherever you listen. And if you like what you hear - give us a 5 Star review!
- You can listen to all our episodes, at any time, by visiting our website at www.biteyourtonguepodcast.com
- Follow up on our social media platforms
- SHARE THIS EPISODE WITH A FRIEND!
- Tell us what topics you'd like us to cover - send us an email at biteyourtongue@gmail.com
And....finally, remember there are just sometimes you have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
More about our guests:
Angela "Merk" Nguyen, 24, is an LA-based podcast producer who is a self-described "cis sis with a knack for puns and alliterations." She got her start in audio through KUOW's RadioActive Youth Media and can #humblebrag about being on NPR airwaves as a teen. She also aspires to be the next SpongeBob ( really, ask about her voice acting dreams).
Nygel Turner, 24, is an Oakland, California-based creator of Not Your Father’s Podcast and YouTube series Not Your Mama’s Kitchen. Nyge is the only person in Oakland who has never lost an argument. One day we’ll all see him own the red Jeep of his fantasies.
Grandparenting. This episode is for anyone who is a grandparent, has a grandparent in their life - or might soon become a grandparent. Or you just love an exceptional interview with a fabulous guest!
We welcome Julie Dolan Smith, one of the legendary Satellite Sisters. With over 20-years in the radio/podcast industry, Julie has now taken on the alter ego of “Urban Nana.” With 10 grandchildren and years of experience, her wit and wisdom will make you laugh. and think.
We explore with Julie many questions submitted by listeners:
- When should grandparents get involved in disciplining, or even just talking to their grandchildren about their bad or impolite behavior, if ever?
- When does it become necessary to tell the parents about bad or unkind behavior from the grandchildren?
- When grandchildren are at their grandparents’ home, being taken care of by the grandparents, whose rules have to be followed?
- What is your advice for the grandparent who lives far away from the grandchildren? How can they keep the connection alive?
She sums things up very quickly with ONE piece of advice we all will want to tape to our foreheads.
We hope you enjoy the episode. To learn more about Julie and the Satellite Sisters, visit their website. You can link to all of their podcast episodes, read the bios and learn why this podcast is really like “having coffee with a friend.” Here is a quick link to their 20-year-history video.
If you've missed any of our episodes, just visit our website: Biteyoutonguepodcast.com and listen when you can!
One quick favor: If you liked this episode - please share with a friend.
Subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform - and give us a review!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
In this episode, we speak to two young adults -- Sarah and Dan. Both of them are in their early 30s. We work to uncover their thoughts about young adulthood and the role their parents played in their journey.
Full disclosure -- both of these young adults, although from different parts of the country, are white and from middle to upper-middle-class families. Our goal over the next year is to speak with more young adults, from many different backgrounds. But this is a start.
Both of them give us some solid advice on issues such as:
- Do they want to know if you do not approve of their significant other?
- How often should you call - or not?
- When did they feel like they were "adults," and what did it mean to them?
- What is the hardest part of being an adult?
- How do their families deal with finances and if they were ready for a fiancial education in their younger years?
- Did they have reckless years in their 20s and do they agree with our earlier interveiw with Dr. Larry Nelson?
Stay- tuned for their final advice at the end of the episode. It is worth waiting for.
Remember to write to us with your thoughts on the episodes and what topics you would like us to cover. Reach us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com.
Visit our website: BITEYOURTONGUEPODCAST.com for all of the episodes. Listen when you can!
Please take a minute and subscribe and give us a review wherever you listen to your podcasts!
Follow us on all of our social media platforms - and comment - we love to hear from you!
FACEBOOK TWITTER INSTAGRAM LINKEDIN
The emerging adult - now recognized as “the third stage of life.”
Our guest today says that studying the emerging adult years (about age 19-29) is much like studying the preschool years — the preschool years set the stage for the teen years, and the emerging adult years set the stage for the future adulthood.
Today we talk with Dr. Larry Nelson, one of the world’s leading researchers on the emerging adult years. Dr. Nelson is the president of the Study of Emerging Adulthood (SSEA) and examines factors that contribute to flourishing or floundering during this time. He has published over 70 peer-reviewed journal articles and chapters in edited books on topics including conceptions of adulthood, social withdrawal, and the role of parents and culture in the transition to adulthood.
Here are some things you will learn from today’s episode:
- Why is this period of life critical to setting the stage for the adult years?
- What role do parents play during this stage of life?
- What are the signals for the flourishing and/or floundering young adult?
- Why our generation might not have done it “right.”
- How this stage of life is dealt with in many other parts of the world, and how we can learn from them.
…and more
To learn more about the emerging adult and Dr. Nelson, here are some informative links: - Society for the Study of Emerging Adulthood
- Flourishing in Emerging Adulthood, book by Dr. Nelson
- Distinguishing Features of Emerging Adulthood: The Role of Self-Classification as an Adult
We are anxious to hear your thoughts once you have listened to the episode.
Check out our website at www.biteyourtonguepodcast.com
Follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.
And please reach out to us by email with any suggestions for guests or episode ideas that YOU want see covered: Email: Biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Finally, remember there are just sometimes you have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Until next time - keep on listening!
Welcome to our 8th episode!
Every time I listen to an episode, I think to myself, "everyone needs to listen to this. There are so many valuable nuggets of information for all of us in every episode."
For this episode - I plead with everyone to listen and share it.
Many of us think we are progressive and accepting, but to step into someone's shoes helps us learn so much more. This episode is NOT JUST FOR PARENTS of LGBTQ+ children, but for ALL OF US. Let me know what you think.
Today I speak with Levi Teachey, who is the Board President of PFLAG Denver,and Stacey Shigaya, who is the organization's Board Secretary.
Levi shares his very personal journey as a trans man and Stacey shares her journey both as an ally within the LGBTQ+ community and with her daughter who is pansexual.
We discuss both their stories and the rapidly changing landscape of this community. Planned Parenthood writes: "Understanding the words, and the labels people use encourages respect and understanding."
Please share the episode with friends and family who you think might benefit.
Stacey and Levi also shared these documents which I found very helpful:
Glossary of Terms (https://pflag.org/glossary)
Faith FAQs (https://pflag.org/faithfaq)
Becoming a Trans Ally 101 (https://pflag.org/transally101recording)
Finally, Levi ends each of his emails with this phrase -- "courage, kindness and lasting change," -- keep it handy!
PFLAG is a national organization founded in 1972 by Jeanne Manford, who marched with her son, in a gay pride parade in New York, with a sign that read: "Parents of Gays Unite." It has become one of the most important organizations building support for friends and families of the LGBTQ+ community.
Gender Revolution: A Journey with Katie Couric
Finally, please remember to subscribe to this podcast, give us a review and follow us on all of our social media platforms:
And PLEASE reach out to us by email with any suggestions for guests or episode ideas that YOU want see covered: Email: Biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Finally, remember there are just sometimes you have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Until next time - keep on listening!
Join us for a conversation with Dr. Susan Heitler, a renowned relationship therapist. She is best known for clarifying the basics of collaborative dialogue and provides wonderful techniques to use - not only with your adult children but for all of the relationships in your life you value.You will take away real tools, words and actions to develop meaningful relationships. This is a must listen. Take your time, take notes and share with others you love.
Dr. Heitler appeared on the CBS Early Show where anchor Harry Smith introduced her as “the most influential person in my life—my therapist.” He encouraged his viewers similarly to seek therapy when they feel distressed and to check out pre-marital counseling before they wed.
Some links you will enjoy:
- Dr. Heitler's Website therapyhelp.com
- Dr. Heitler's Tedx Talk
- Psychology Today (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/contributors/susan-heitler-phd)
- Power of Two (https://www.poweroftwomarriage.com/)
- This is from Modern Love: The Podcast. We thought it was appropriate for the advice Dr. Heitler gave us: "Shamu and a Happy Marriage." (https://www.nytimes.com/2019/10/11/style/modern-love-what-shamu-taught-me-happy-marriage.html)
Finally, please remember to subscribe to this podcast, give us a review and follow us on all of our social media platforms and of course all of our episodes are available on our website. (https://bite-your-tongue-the-podcast-1.podsite.io/)
And PLEASE reach out to us by email with any suggestions for guests or episode ideas that YOU want see covered: Email: Biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Finally, remember there are just sometimes you have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Until next time - keep on listening!
Have you ever worried that your adult children have no spiritual foundation -- or maybe that their connection to God or a higher power is different from yours?
How do you handle and respect your adult child's choices, if you are very religious or even if you find spirituality a source of strength and wish this for your child? How also do you deal with a child that might become very religious when you are agnostic? ‘
Join this wonderful discussion with the Reverend Elizabeth P. Randall and Galit Pinksy Gottlieb.
Elizabeth is the Rector at St. Andrew's Episcopal Church in Denver, Colorado. She is a graduate of Smith College and Yale Divinity School and was one of the first clergy in Denver to recognize and perform weddings for the LGBTQ community. She’s been happily married for over 30-years to someone who is Jewish. Together they have one daughter.
Galit, who practices Conservative Judaism, served as a Synagogue Cantor for many years. She is also an author as well as a mother and the wife of a Jewish scholar. Her children were raised in the Jewish tradition and now are all in long-term relationships with non-Jewish partners.
These two women bring great insight and strength to many parents of adult children who may struggle with their adult children who have no spiritual foundation, or a spiritual following that is very different from their own. Research tells us that millennials, between the ages of 23 and 39, are likely to say they have no religion. It is not clear if this is temporary, but mounting evidence is showing that our younger generations may be leaving religion for good.
So many journeys to understand, learn and accept. We think both Elizabeth and Galit offer support, understanding and some brilliant and thoughtful ideas and approaches.
We think you will love this episode. Please let us know what you think. Email us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com and visit our website BITE YOUR TONGUE to listen to all of our episodes and provide feedback. We cannot do it without you!
Watch for our next episode to drop in two weeks - Friday, July 9. A conversation with renowned relationship therapist, Dr. Susan Heitler. She helps us
As always, follow up on FACEBOOK, TWITTER and INSTAGRAM. We are honored and thrilled with each new follower!
Galit is also an author of a wonderful mystery book series called the Whipped and Sipped Mysteries.
This is a wonderful episode with lots of advice and suggestions from Kris Burbank, a coach for parents of people with disabilities. She is the proud mother of three grown children, including a son born four months premature with severe cerebral palsy.
She shares her story along with Dr. Ellen Braaten, a co-host of the episode who has a brother with Downs syndrome.
Please also take a minute to listen to another podcast that we mention during the episode. Remarkable group of three moms - all with children with Down Syndrome. For three seasons, Heather Avis, Micha Boyett, and Mercedes Lara have become even closer friends than ever before. Together, they take on conversations in the Down Syndrome Community that not only we want to hear, but need to hear and share as we shout the worth of our loved ones with Down Syndrome. THE LUCKY FEW PODCAST. (theluckyfewpodcast.com).
Here are links to some of the website that Kris mentioned during the podcast:
-
- Great article on preferred language for addressing those with special needs
- A link to Kris' newsletter: This one is on Taboo Talks: Newsletter on Sexuality
- Future Planning
- Siblings
- Sexuality
- SSI Government Benefits
- Parent Support
Finally, please remember to subscribe to this podcast, give us a review and follow us on all of our social media platforms and take a look at our NEW WEBSITE!!!!
And PLEASE reach out to us by email with any suggestions for guests or episode ideas that YOU want see covered: Email: Biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Finally, remember there are just sometimes you have to BITE YOUR TONGUE!
Until next time - keep on listening!
We are kicking off summer with an episode we are calling “Whose Wedding is it Anyway!”
"It's in our DNA to want our parents to approve of us!"
Listen to the great advice and suggestions from Aleigh Huston-Lyons, a therapist and coach at AisleTalk: Consultation & Therapy. A boutique practice devoted to helping brides and grooms cope with the stresses that arise during wedding planning and anticipation of marriage. AisleTalk is New York City-based, but works with clients all over the world. You can get in touch with their team through the website aisle-talk.com or @aisletalk on instagram!
From engagement and finances to the invite list and drama, Aleigh puts in all in perspective.
Social media has taken a toll on weddings and learn how Aleigh gives some sound advice on keeping it all under control.
Subscribe and review us on your podcast platform. We appreciate every review.
Have questions/concerns or want to share ideas for topics? Email us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Join the conversation:
FACEBOOK
INSTAGRAM
TWITTER
Stay tuned for an amazing episode on Parents of Adult Children with Disabilities and one on Spirituality.
And remember, sometimes you just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE.
Happy Mother’s Day!
Today we are joined by two amazing moms with great advice for keeping our relationships with our adult children healthy, fun and spirited. Also listen for some special Mother’s Day messages of support and advice from some young adults!
This will be an episode that will get you thinking, make you smile and lift you up.
We hope you enjoy it!
Have questions/concerns or want to share ideas for topics? Email us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Join the conversation:
If you missed our first episode with author Amanda Morin, “Adulting Made Easy,” or the second one with former personal finance editor of The Wall Street Journal on “Money and Your Adult Child”, check them out!
Stay-tuned for episodes on Whose Wedding is it Anyway?, Parenting adult kids with disabilities, LBGTQ, spirituality and more.
And remember, sometimes you just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE.
Former Wall Street Journal columnist and finance reporter Jeff Opdyke joins us for a discussion on our adult kids and money. He gives us some advice on “just say no,” to saying point blank, “Boomers are the most financially ignorant people on the planet” and warns us “We are moving into a time that is going to filled with a lot of hurt honestly and kids need to understand now how best to manage their money, how best to invest” Insight on inheritance, wills and preparing your kids for financial success.
Learn more about Jeff and all of his books here and also check out his past columns on LOVE and MONEY in the WSJ.
Have questions/concerns or want to share ideas for topics? Email us at biteyourtonguepodcast@gmail.com
Join the conversation:FACEBOOKINSTAGRAMTWITTERI**f you missed our first episode with author Amanda Morin, “Adulting Made Easy,” we hope you will check it out.
Stay-tuned for episodes on “Whose Wedding is it Anyway?”, Parenting adult kids with disabilities, LBGTQ, spirituality and more.**
And remember, sometimes you just have to BITE YOUR TONGUE.
Date: Recorded on Sunday, April 4 - Dropped on April 17
Name of Show: Adulting Made Easy - Author Amanda Morin
Episode Title and #: Adulting Made Easy - #01
Summary:
- Show hosts: Denise Gorant and Dr. Ellen Braaten
- Guest: Author Amanda Morin shared details of her newly released book, “Adulting Made Easy.”
How to help your adult kids transition to adulthood. How to provide advice, without being shut out and what role do parents play.
“We really do not know much about this stage of parenting, no one has really studied it, it is really new territory,” Dr. Ellen Braaten.
What kind of support do young adults need and how parents can play a role -- from understanding health insurance to boiling and egg and doing laundry. How to provide advice to adult kids without being shut out.
“It’s a dance,” said Morin. “One foot in and one foot out.” She also offered the phrase, “I may not agree with you, but I support your choice,” and “You do not owe me an explanation. When adult kids make a decision and are asking for approval - “you do not owe me an explanation.”
List of Resources:
Adulting Made Easy on Amazon. But check your local bookstore too.
Understood.org
Amanda Morin
Dr. Ellen Braaten
Join the conversation:
BITE YOUR TONGUE FACEBOOK
BITE YOUR TONGUE INSTAGRAM
A one minute intro to the exciting new podcast BITE YOUR TONGUE, building healthy relationships with your adult kids. We will explore that next chapter in parenting that no one thinks about. I hope you will join us! Watch for Episode I to drop soon!