Totally Normal Politics: Recent Episodes
Fat Whippet
I am a dimwitted man and have no intention of getting smarter before I die. In light of that I will not accept any explanation other than malfeasance and complacency as to why the War on Drugs hasn't come to a screeching halt. We have defeated the last administration, we owe this one nothing.
- Harriet Tubman on the $20
- Weak Democrat Lies
- Why is Elliot Paige getting divorced on CNN?
- Reddit vs. Wall Street
- Rudy vs Dominion
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Nick and Vitaliy having a completely normal one at the end of a fairly normal presidency
- Goodbye Donnie/ Hello Biden
- Resign Cruz, Hawley, Boebert
- Extremism in the military
- Washington turned into a National Guard base for the Inauguration
- GOP donor recoiling
- Biden’s first 100 days
- $1400 checks and student loan forgiveness??
- Eviction restrictions
- Mask mandates on interstate travel
- End Muslim Ban
- Rejoin the Paris Agreement
- Close gun “loop holes”
- Going back to being angry with the President over normal shit
Also if you wanna see the video feed we are now on youtube.
What can we call January 6th?
Hang Mike Pence?
What to do about Boebart and Cruz?
The hilarious arrests
Hunger Strike for Angeli
Impeachment?
Hawley
Parler is out
Ghouliani is disbarred
Sheldon Adelson is dead
Also the show is available on youtube now you filthy animals!
Just Nick and Vitaliy this week, here to ponder and puzzle whether you deserve access to your own tax money. After powerful deliberation our so called overlords in DC have decided to throw us peasants a few breadcrumbs, a sampling of the daily opulence that tickles their fancies to the tune of 20-30% of every penny you have or will ever have earned. Perhaps this token gesture of 1% annual average income coupon of a still-working American can allay the unwashed masses from tearing through the doors of our oppressors and flaying skin from blood and bone in a flurry of vindicated recompense? Can these enslaved proles be distracted from the shackles that bind them amidst a dangled flurry of consumerist exclusion? Do you love your family enough to spend your last few dollars on a Nintendo Switch and a shattered sense of security? Find out all of this and more on this weeks episode!
Hot Takes
- $600 for everyone
- Georgia Senate run off
- Mitch McConnell is the Grinch
- Luke Letlow dies of coronavirus
I'm gonna level with you all on this one, we hit a lot of snags. Hampton couldn't make it, the mics cut out, the camera was moved, and the dogs wouldn't quit barking. Despite all these setbacks Vitaliy and Nick decided to meet and discuss the current state of play in the ever contentious world of tech, specifically how the Zuckertroll is all too late realizing he has no friends.
Hot Takes:
- America sues Facebook
- Google fires scientist for informing them they are evil
- Mastercard and Visa attack Pornhub
- Monopolies and Duopolies continue to govern our reality
Just Nick and Vitaliy this week so strap on your tinfoil hat because it's gonna get conspiratorial!
Hot Takes
- I have ended my friendship with Crooked Media
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Stop the Steal Rally in Georgia
- Sidney Powell has become the Kraken
- Boycott the election!
- Gabriel Sterling condemns the president's actions
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Guliani’s Witnesses
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Melissa Carone
- An actress claiming to be an IT specialist
- Visibly appears drunk during hearing
- Is deemed “not credible” by the court
- “All Chinese people look the same”
- Democrats owning themselves on loan forgiveness
- Bank of America pledges to not fund oil exploration in the National Arctic Wildlife Refuge
- Obama might allow vaccine companies to Tuskegee him on national television
- The House dares the Senate to make weed legal
- Donald Trump keeps stacking up donations to fund any and everything
- Ivanka gets deposed for strange Inauguration pricing at Trump Hotel
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The government was compelled to pay $135,000 for a $5000 ballroom
- Trump will defund the military if Twitter doesn’t stop bullying him
This will be the longest election that anyone has ever lived through, at least in the US. As a result token Republican Dave joins Nick, Hampton and Vitaliy to hash out what the prospects for a Biden presidency are while also looking at the current state of both our fractured parties.
Hot Takes
- South Dakota is overrun
- Crowder is the biggest news show in America
- Troops withdrawn from the Middle East
- Primary Brian Kemp
- Public Banking?
- Pence Refuses to Answer Questions from Press
- Justice Alito, federalist society speech
Geopolitics
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Armenia and Azerbaija
- Russia, France, the United States, and the European Union all called for a ceasefire, which has been reached
- China and Hong Kong
- Chinese government disqualifies 4 pro-democracy members of Hong Kong’s parliament, declaring them threats to national security
- US condemns the step towards one-party dictatorship, while EU calls for reversal of China’s decision, and the UK sanctions China
Normal News
- Trump’s attempt to get faithless electors in Michigan
- Trump’s Business being investigated for paying Ivanka consulting fee’s
- The Legal Role of Vice President, Hardball Kamala
Nick and Vitaliy are talking about some of the court cases being opened and closed around the country.
Stories this week
- FBI investigates Texas AG
- DOJ stops investigating Caterpillar, DeJoy
-
Monica Palmer and William Hartmann step in front of a moving train called democracy
- Ned Staebler gives the rant of his life
- Wave of death threats to election officials across the country
- Nevada receives death threats
- Philly receives death threats
- Georgia receives death threats
- Arizona receives death threats
- Democrats ponder forgiving student debt, but doing it stupidly
- Pfizer announces it is working with Biden, around Trump
- Trump fires some last minute enemies
- Biden’s Cabinet Hopefuls
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Trump only wants a recount in the racially diverse parts of Wisconsin
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0-1-28
You didn't think it would be that easy, did you?
We Thought It Was Just An Election
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The Demographics
- The Suburbs break for Biden
- Georgia is too black for the Republicans
- Non-Spanish speaking Hispanics broke for Trump
- Black votes doubled for Trump
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The Shifts
- Arkansas goes deep red
- The City/Country Divide
- The Strategy Going Forward
The Transition . . . INTO FASCISM?
- The Denial Begins
- Conservatives Abandon Fox News in Droves after Arizona Call
- Parler, Rumble, Newsmax, MeWe
- The Lines Are Drawn
- Do you believe in fraud or not?
- World Leaders congratulate President Biden
- Republicans begin cannibalizing their own
- Alex Jones and James O’Keefe offer money for fraud, turn up no results
- Pompeo engages in sedition
- Pompeo begins facing pushback from world leaders
- Barr allows DOJ to intervene in election investigations
- Do you believe in fraud or not?
- The Wagons Are Circled
- McEnany pulls a Sean Spicer and is set out as a sacrifice
- Jones Day and Porter Wright are put on blast
- The looming threat of TrumpTV?
- Trumps super pac’s raising money for debts
- The Cases Are Seen
- A lawyer is threatened with wasting time in Pennsylvania
- Sharpiegate is thrown out
- GOP Judges in Nevada say the GOP is wasting everyone’s time
- Georgia agrees to spend taxpayer money on a hand recount
The Hopes and Dreams in a Republican Senate
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Can Biden Even Do Shit?
- 277 executive actions on Day 1
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The Democrats Going Forward
- Fire Pelosi?
- The AOC Debate
- The Republicans Going Forward
- Is Trump a Unique Political Genius?
- Trump will hold this party hostage till he dies
- Will McConnell end the bullshit now that he’s working with a white man?
- Is obstructionism the only way when you have no policy plans?
WARNING: DRUNK MEN YELLING ABOUT THE ELECTION WITHIN. I DO NOT HATE TEXAS, OHIO, or WISCONSIN. I HATE THE DEMOCRATIC STRATEGY
In honor of the state of chaos our country is in, the gang gets together to corroborate and collate all the info we have on the situation so far. Will the Dems ever win Florida again? What's going on in Arizona? Should we keep wasting time in Texas? I don't know and I am sorry for all the yelling
Our Expectations
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Pollsters
- 538
- Quinnipiac
- Possibilities
- A Biden Blowout
- A Trump Win
- A Vicious Nailbiter
- Going Into Election Night
The Day Of
- Florida Breaks My Heart Into A Million Pieces
- Wisconsin Causes Xanax Sales to Soar
- Texas, Time Well Spent
- Stop the Vote, Don’t Stop the Vote Baby!
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Every State Votes a Lil’ Diff’ent
- Republicans don’t understand different election laws
The Day After
- The Most Haunted Election Ever
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Black People Save America, Again
- “Hi, Georgia”
- “Sup Milwaukee”
- “Eh Philly’
- Detroit has entered the chat
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The Latino Vote is Fake
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Viva Las Vegas
- Cubans are White
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The Mounting Lawsuits
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The legitimacy of US Courts
- GOP is Currently Running a Loyalty Test
- What is Political Violence Anymore? Growing Unrest?
The Nontroversies
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Oregon decriminalizes the personal possession of all drugs
- First state
- Including heroin and cocaine
- Funds freed up by less prosecution and incarceration
- Instead of incarceration users will either have to pay a fine or attend a treat
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Multiple states Legalize It
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What is the War on Drugs Anymore?
- California Destroys the Gig Economy
- Florida Raises the Minimum Wage
Get settled for an absolutely normal one folks. For our first guest on the show local Florida gun and gun law expert Dave (Lastname Witheld) has joined the team to shed some light on what the other side of the aisle is making of all this hullabaloo.
Hot Takes
- Texas has already exceeded 2016 turnout
- Duval County Judge of Elections Brent Shore resigns
- Trump supporters abandoned in Nebraska rally
- Ted Cruz reminds people about the debt
Normal News
- Kavanaugh’s Mail-In Ballot Ruling
- No Stimulus Relief Before the Election
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The modern function of identity
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Conservative Black Rappers
- Wakka
- Lil Wayne
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50 Cent
- Left Celebrity Call Outs
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Alan Alda
- Bruce Springsteen
- Ricky Martin
- Rittenhouse is extradited to Wisconsin
- Polls say democrats will most likely win the Senate and the Presidency and hold the house
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CORRECTIONS: We originally comment that Trump replied "Good" in response to being asked about children in cages. Upon rewatch we have noticed he actually said "Go ahead" and apologize for this inaccuracy.
If you were looking for a point for point breakdown of the second presidential debate from the twisted jowls of some regular folks, look no further.
The Debate
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Differentiators
- Mics off
- Trump advisors
- The Mod
- The Questions
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How would you change your coronavirus response?
- What do you think of the impacts of the depression?
- What do you think about the spike after the opening of school
- You described Fauci a disaster and called medical experts idiots
- Russia and Iran are interfering, what would you do to stop this?
- When Taxes?
- Was anything about your son’s relationships in Ukraine unethical?
- How can voters know you have no conflicts of interests?
- Would you make China pay?
- Do you see the Nuclear issue in North Korea as progressing?
- What would you do for 20mil Americans losing their healthcare?
- Why haven’t you helped women or people of color?
- How will the US reunite children with their families separated at the border?
- Why should voters trust Biden with border control?
- Why do parents fear for their children?
- Are you contributing to hate and racial strife?
- What would you do about your Biden crime bills?
- How would you combat climate change and support job growth?
- Why should families near processing facilities give you another 4 years?
- What would you say to those who didn’t vote for you
The Hugs
The Post-commentary
How are we to believe our country is safe when a washed up comedian continues to punk on our administration? Who will protect us from jihadists when Russian hackers put French comics on our laptops? When will we get a non-racist twitter clone?
Hot Takes
- Trump threatens to leave the country
- Trump’s Chinese bank account
- A French beheading
- AOC on Twitch
- Ivanka is using the pandemic to learn guitar
- Maga2020! is my password
- Trump storms out of 60 Minutes interview
- What’s wrong with Mitch Mcconnell’s hands?!
Normal Stuff
- Hunter Biden’s laptop
- Twitter censors NYPost
- Guliani implicates himself
- Russia and Iran now both meddling in the Election “perception hacks”
Let the backstabbing begin
Hot Takes
- Cash and and change shortage across America
- Max Linn gaffes it up in Maine
- Biden Island
- Man assaulted by 7+ officers in Taylor, MI
- Bolsanaro won’t even sell the rainforest
- Trump administration denies disaster relief to California for wildfires
- Trump is visiting Georgia and spending money there, a state he shouldn’t have to
Normal Stuff
- Ben Sass turns on the president, fearing a “Republican bloodbath”
- Chris Christie turns on the virus, endorsing Remdesivir
- Rudy’s daughter turns on him
- Biden turns on drug users
- Trump turns on debt
Town Halls
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Biden schedules on ABC
- Focus on the ball
- Changes
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Trump schedules on NBC
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Follow up questions? Who?
- QAnon—what’s that?
- I get tested everyday, but I don’t remember the result of my test before the last debate
Theory
- Necropolitics Achille Mbembe: Its New Relevance
- the ultimate expression of sovereignty resides, to a large degree, in the power and the capacity to dictate who may live and who must die.
- 240,000 deaths predicted by the beginning of November
- America’s third wave and Europe’s second
As is a time honored Florida tradition, this November we will vote on ballot initiatives that we barely understand. With that in mind Vitaliy has compiled a normal person's primer to what each of the 6 amendments does and how they will affect your day to day life. While we voice our decisions on each, feel free to vote how you feel.
Powered by Remdesivir Nick, Hampton and Vitaliy meet up to discuss the boring debate, a crazy kidnapping, and a president powered by sacrilegious stem cells
Vice Presidential Debate
- Both candidates evade all questions and just talk about whatever they want
Guys No one Wants to Drink With Arrested
- 13 men plotting to kidnap and try Gov. Gretchen Whitmer are caught and arrested by FBI
- The Curious Case of Alexandra Scott
- Have Trump’s dog whistles turned into flares?
A Losing Trump is a Desperate Trump
- WIth his poll numbers sliding and still sick with Covid Trump attacks the members of his Cabinet for not arresting his political rivals. (Mad at Bill Barr, Mike Pompeo, Christopher Wray)
Trump’s Treatment
- Trump posts a video of him in front of a green screen south lawn promising free covid medicine to seniors with absolutely no plan to actually accomplish that.
In these unprecedented times 3 regular voters gather to discuss the how the politics at hand affect their average day to day lives.
Hot Takes
- Kim Guilfoyle is accused of being a sexual komodo dragon
- The Proud Boys, Kyle Rittenhouse claim suit against Biden for defamation
- The League of Women Voters sue TX Governor Abbott for election interference
- Melania hates children and Christmas
- Jimmy Dore thinks abortion was never on the table
The Debate
- Trump
Calls Hunter Biden a crackhead
Interrupts Joe
Argues with Chris Wallace
Insults Joe for wearing a mask
Fails to secure a hug from his lady Melania * Biden
Doesn’t go for the dunk
Doesn’t mention Hermain Cain
Avoids all familial banter
Jill gives him an affirmative embrace at the end * Chris Wallace
Says the Trump campaign are unreasonable liars.
The Prestige
- Every Republican gets covid
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Trump is getting an experimental treatment in Walter Reed Bunker
- Trump buys pizza for his hospital visitors
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South Carolina Debates?
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Lindsey Graham gets slapped around by Harrison