Choose To Be with Choose Recovery Services: Recent Episodes
Choose Recovery Services - Alana Gordon and Amie Woolsey
Choose To Be is focused on women healing from infidelity, betrayal trauma, or from the sexual acting out of their spouse. We are a company committed to helping women heal. Come be part of the conversation as we interview experts, others who have gone through this journey, as well as gain tools to help you move forward. Alana and Amie bring their own experiences to the conversation as well as their individual expertise that makes for such a unique and valuable resource.
For more information, go to ChooseRecoveryServices.com or email us at info@chooserecoveryservices.com
One of the most agonizing questions after a betrayal is, “Should I stay or go?” In this episode, Amie and Alana delve into the complex process of determining the answer to that question.
Learn how to confront your fears and conscientiously choose the right path for you - whether that’s rebuilding the relationship or starting anew.
Listen to learn:
- Why there is no inherent right or wrong answer when choosing whether to stay or go
- How to explore your fears, hopes, and values as you make this critical decision
- What your partner can do to support you in this process
Referenced in this episode:
- Should I Stay or Go? - Amie’s self-paced course designed to be a companion on your journey toward self-discovery and personal empowerment. Through reflective journal prompts, you’ll explore your feelings, fears, and the values that are most important to you. Use the coupon code MYGUIDE for $5 off!
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Beyond the Facade Podcast - Luke Gordon hosts a podcast geared toward helping men live authentically and in harmony with their values.
- Choose Healing - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping with the symptoms of trauma. First four weeks are free!
- Believing in You - In this program Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn tools that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again.
- Healing Hearts - This group is for couples seeking healing after betrayal. It emphasizes the development of empathy, integrity, and authentic intimacy.
- Help. Her. Heal - This program is for men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - This betrayal trauma support group is for men who have been betrayed. They will receive resources to recover from betrayal trauma while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose Renewal - For women recovering from unwanted sexual behavior, whether it’s a recurring challenge or a one-time incident. Focus on recovery and healing from patterns of sexual acting out in a safe, nurturing community.
- Resilient Teens - Ongoing support group for teens ages 15-18 whose parents have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
- Adult Children Uniting for Healing - Ongoing support group for adult children of parents who have experienced betrayal in their marriage and who need support navigating their own experience with betrayal.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Amie Woolsey hosts this workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon
Amie Woolsey
Choose Recovery Services
When betrayal strikes, the question of “Who do I tell?” weighs heavily. In this episode, Amie and Alana provide a roadmap through this complex decision as they talk about finding emotional safety and trusting your intuition.
Whether you’re just beginning your journey or are further along, this conversation provides a compassionate and nuanced perspective on who to confide in during this vulnerable time.
Listen to learn:
- Strategies for determining who is and is not emotionally safe to confide in
- How to respond if someone can’t hold space for your full story
- Ways to build a support system at different levels of intimacy
- Why support groups and professionals are vital to healing
Referenced in this episode:
- Intimacy Within Self Paced Course- Creating healthy intimacy with your partner begins with creating healthy intimacy within. Amie’s self-paced course and guidebook will walk you through the seven levels of intimacy to help you learn what healthy looks like.
- Choose Healing - Join this weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping. First four weeks are free!
Register Now!
- In-person Intensive: Unmasked: Paths to Authentic Masculinity - This is a three-day live intensive for men led by Alana and Luke Gordon. This program is designed to help men delve deep into understanding integrity, unveiling layers of shame, and reclaiming their authentic selves. Intensive will be held in Spanish Fork, UT on July 17-19, 2024. Learn more and register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Beyond the Facade Podcast - Luke Gordon hosts a podcast geared toward helping men live authentically and in harmony with their values.
- Choose Healing - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping with the symptoms of trauma. First four weeks are free!
- Believing in You - In this program Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn tools that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again.
- Healing Hearts - This group is for couples seeking healing after betrayal. It emphasizes the development of empathy, integrity, and authentic intimacy.
- Help. Her. Heal - This program is for men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - This betrayal trauma support group is for men who have been betrayed.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose Renewal - For women recovering from unwanted sexual behavior, whether it’s a recurring challenge or a one-time incident.
- Resilient Teens - Ongoing support group for teens ages 15-18 whose parents have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
- Adult Children Uniting for Healing - Ongoing support group for adult children of parents who have experienced betrayal in their marriage and who need support.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Amie Woolsey hosts this workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first.
- Should I Stay or Go? - Self-paced course designed to be a companion on your journey toward self-discovery and personal empowerment.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon
Amie Woolsey
Choose Recovery Services
How do you love yourself first AND do the hard things? In this episode, Amie shares personal experiences and offers powerful perspectives on truly nurturing yourself through life’s chaos. You’ll learn practical tips for self-compassion, setting boundaries, and making time for yourself. This episode will give you the courage to turn inward as you foster internal resilience and well-being in your healing journey.
Listen to learn:
- Why real love requires freedom for authenticity
- The link between self-love and secure attachment
- How to shift from occasional indulgences to consistent self-respect
Referenced in this episode:
- Intimacy Within Self Paced Course- Creating healthy intimacy with your partner begins with creating healthy intimacy within. Amie’s self-paced course and guidebook will walk you through the seven levels of intimacy to help you learn what healthy looks like.
- Choose Healing - Join this weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping. First four weeks are free!
Register Now!
- In-person Intensive: Unmasked: Paths to Authentic Masculinity - This is a three-day live intensive for men led by Alana and Luke Gordon. This program is designed to help men delve deep into understanding integrity, unveiling layers of shame, and reclaiming their authentic selves. Intensive will be held in Spanish Fork, UT on July 17-19, 2024. Learn more and register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Beyond the Facade Podcast - Luke Gordon hosts a podcast geared toward helping men live authentically and in harmony with their values.
- Believing in You - In this program Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn tools that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again.
- Healing Hearts - This group is for couples seeking healing after betrayal. It emphasizes the development of empathy, integrity, and authentic intimacy.
- Help. Her. Heal - This program is for men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - This betrayal trauma support group is for men who have been betrayed. They will receive resources to recover from betrayal trauma while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose Renewal - For women recovering from unwanted sexual behavior, whether it’s a recurring challenge or a one-time incident.
- Resilient Teens - Ongoing support group for teens ages 15-18 whose parents have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
- Adult Children Uniting for Healing - Ongoing support group for adult children of parents who have experienced betrayal in their marriage and who need support navigating their own experience with betrayal.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Amie Woolsey hosts this workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
- Should I Stay or Go? - Self-paced course designed to be a companion on your journey toward self-discovery and personal empowerment.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon
Amie Woolsey
Choose Recovery Services
It can feel soul-crushing if your partner asks for a separation, but what if it’s actually an opportunity in disguise? This week Amie is a guest on Luke Gordon’s podcast. Luke is a men’s emotional health coach and cofounder at Choose Recovery Services.
Listen in as Luke and Amie talk about how couples can use separation as a catalyst for profound individual healing and growth which can bring about lasting change in their relationship.
Listen to learn:
- How separation can be beneficial and even necessary for healing and reintegration
- Why tension is needed to break old destructive patterns
- What a separation aims to accomplish
Referenced in this episode:
- Beyond the Facade - Subscribe to Luke Gordon’s new podcast Beyond the Facade. Each week Luke will delve into topics such as authenticity, vulnerability, and integrity. Learn how to unmask your authentic self to deepen connections to yourself and others.
- Believing in You - In this program Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn tools that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again.
Register Now!
- In-person Intensive: Unmasked: Paths to Authentic Masculinity - This is a three-day live intensive for men led by Alana and Luke Gordon. This program is designed to help men delve deep into understanding integrity, unveiling layers of shame, and reclaiming their authentic selves. Intensive will be held in Spanish Fork, UT on July 17-19, 2024. Learn more and register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping. First four weeks are free!
- Healing Hearts - This group is for couples seeking healing after betrayal.
- Help. Her. Heal - This program is for men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - This betrayal trauma support group is for men who have been betrayed.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors.
- Choose Renewal - For women recovering from unwanted sexual behavior.
- Resilient Teens - Ongoing support group for teens ages 15-18 whose parents have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
- Adult Children Uniting for Healing - Ongoing support group for adult children of parents who have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
- Should I Stay or Go? - Self-paced course designed to be a companion on your journey toward self-discovery and personal empowerment.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon
Amie Woolsey
Choose Recovery Services
Last week we learned the thought patterns of those who are in the victim and emerger stages of healing from trauma. Today Amie takes us through the final two stages - reclaimer and chooser.
In this episode you’ll learn how to reframe toxic thought patterns and reclaim your truth. Understand how to shed your victimhood, separate your worth from emotions and circumstances, and become the unapologetic chooser of the life you deserve.
Find Victim to Chooser Part 1 HERE
Listen to learn:
- Thoughts that accompany the “reclaimer” and “chooser” stages
- How to break free from the “victim” mindset
- How the “chooser” beliefs can empower you in your choices and actions
Referenced in this episode:
- Victim to Chooser Worksheet
- Resilient Teens - Ongoing support group led by Morgan Ellsworth for teens ages 15-18 whose parents have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
Register Now!
- In-person Intensive: Unmasked: Paths to Authentic Masculinity - This is a three-day live intensive for men led by Alana and Luke Gordon. This program is designed to help men delve deep into understanding integrity, unveiling layers of shame, and reclaiming their authentic selves. Intensive will be held in Spanish Fork, UT on July 17-19, 2024. Learn more and register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Beyond the Facade Podcast - Luke Gordon hosts a podcast geared toward helping men live authentically and in harmony with their values.
- Choose Healing - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping. First four weeks are free!
- Believing in You - Learn how to work WITH your brain instead of against it by gaining tools that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy.
- Healing Hearts - This group is for couples seeking healing after betrayal.
- Help. Her. Heal - This program is for men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - This betrayal trauma support group is for men who have been betrayed.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Choose Renewal - For women recovering from unwanted sexual behavior.
- Resilient Teens - Ongoing support group for teens ages 15-18 whose parents have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
- Adult Children Uniting for Healing - Ongoing support group for adult children of parents who have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
- Should I Stay or Go? - Self-paced course designed to be a companion on your journey toward self-discovery and personal empowerment.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon
Amie Woolsey
Choose Recovery Services
Do you feel stuck in the cycle of victimhood after betrayal, believing thoughts like, “I’ll never trust again” or “I’m not enough”? In this week’s episode, Amie walks us through the “Victim to Chooser” framework sharing the progressive stages she sees clients navigate towards healing and wholeness.
Listen in to see if you have thought patterns that are leaving you stuck in the first two stages, and be sure to tune in next week to learn more about the other two stages. Amie will help you feel seen, validated, and hopeful as you learn to move through the first two stages and onto the growth and healing found in the final two stages.
Listen to learn:
- The four stages of healing from betrayal trauma
- Disempowering thoughts that characterize the “victim” mentality
- Mindset shifts that can occur as you move through the first two stages
Wanting another podcast to listen to?
- Subscribe to Luke Gordon’s new podcast Beyond the Facade. Each week Luke will delve into topics such as authenticity, vulnerability, and integrity. Learn how to unmask your authentic self to deepen connections to yourself and others.
Register Now!
- In-person Intensive: Unmasked: Paths to Authentic Masculinity - This is a three-day live intensive for men led by Alana and Luke Gordon. This program is designed to help men delve deep into understanding integrity, unveiling layers of shame, and reclaiming their authentic selves. Intensive will be held in Spanish Fork, UT on May 16-18, 2024 and also July 17-19, 2024. Learn more and register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping. First four weeks are free!
- Believing in You - Learn how to work WITH your brain instead of against it by gaining tools that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy.
- Healing Hearts - This group is for couples seeking healing after betrayal.
- Help. Her. Heal - This program is for men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - This betrayal trauma support group is for men who have been betrayed.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Choose Renewal - For women recovering from unwanted sexual behavior.
- Resilient Teens - Ongoing support group for teens ages 15-18 whose parents have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
- Adult Children Uniting for Healing - Ongoing support group for adult children of parents who have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
- Should I Stay or Go? - Self-paced course designed to be a companion on your journey toward self-discovery and personal empowerment.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon
Amie Woolsey
Choose Recovery Services
Do you feel stuck wondering if you will ever heal from betrayal trauma? In this powerful episode Amie and Alana share their own experiences grappling with that exact question. They provide wisdom and practical tools for aiding your healing process whether you are just starting out or are further along the path.
You can and will heal - as you keep taking those crucial next steps.
Listen to learn:
- How proper self-care can promote recovery
- The importance of somatic/body-based healing work
- How self-judgment and denial can hinder progress
Referenced in this episode:
- REAL Self-Care: Burnout Is Not Your Fault & the Way Out with Dr. Pooja Lakshmin - episode on the We Can Do Hard Things Podcast
- What Does “Get In Your Body” Mean?” - past episode about somatic healing
- Two groups hosted by Morgan Ellsworth - Adult Children Uniting for Healing and Resilient Teens. These groups are for adult children and teens, respectively, to gain support as they navigate healing from parents who have experienced betrayal in their marriage. Morgan has been there and is passionate about guiding others along their path to healing.
- Should I Stay or Go? - Amie’s self-paced course designed to be a companion on your journey toward self-discovery and personal empowerment.
Wanting another podcast to listen to?
- Subscribe to Luke Gordon’s new podcast Beyond the Facade. Each week Luke will delve into topics such as authenticity, vulnerability, and integrity. Learn how to unmask your authentic self to deepen connections to yourself and others.
Register Now!
- In-person Intensive: Unmasked: Paths to Authentic Masculinity - This is a three-day live intensive for men led by Alana and Luke Gordon. This program is designed to help men delve deep into understanding integrity, unveiling layers of shame, and reclaiming their authentic selves. Intensive will be held in Spanish Fork, UT on May 16-18, 2024 and also July 17-19, 2024. Learn more and register HERE.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - This betrayal trauma support group is for men who have been betrayed. New group beginning soon!
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping with the symptoms of trauma. First four weeks are free!
- Believing in You - In this program Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it.
- Healing Hearts - This group is for couples seeking healing after betrayal.
- Help. Her. Heal - This program is for men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Choose Renewal - For women recovering from unwanted sexual behavior. Focus on recovery and healing from patterns of sexual acting out in a safe, nurturing community.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Amie Woolsey hosts this workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Do you find yourself imagining all the ways things would be better “if he would just…”? If so, you’re not alone! In this episode Amie and Alana dive into this disempowering mindset and provide wisdom on shifting your thinking by focusing on what you can control. Gain clarity as they share candid examples and advice on how to take your next empowered steps regardless of the things your partner is or is not doing.
Listen to learn:
- How to recognize when you’re stuck under the “if” umbrella
- How to focus on personal responsibility
- How to make clear requests in your relationship
- How to reclaim your power
Exciting Resources Coming Soon!
- Beyond the Facade Podcast - Subscribe to this new podcast by Luke Gordon. Learn more about authenticity and the struggle to be real. Subscribe now and watch for the first episode coming soon!
- In-person Intensive: Unmasked: Paths to Authentic Masculinity - This is a three-day live intensive for men led by Alana and Luke Gordon. This program is designed to help men delve deep into understanding integrity, unveiling layers of shame, and reclaiming their authentic selves. Intensive will be held in Spanish Fork, UT on May 16-18, 2024 and also July 17-19, 2024. Learn more and register HERE.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - This betrayal trauma support group is for men who have been betrayed. New group beginning soon!
Promo Code!
- Resilient Teens is an ongoing support group for teens ages 15-18 whose parents have experienced betrayal in their marriage. Register by May 5, 2024 and receive $5 off weekly for the first month using code 5-OFF-TEENS. Register HERE.
- Adult Children Uniting for Healing - Ongoing support group for adult children of parents who have experienced betrayal in their marriage and who need support navigating their own experience. Register by May 5, 2024 and receive $5 off weekly for the first month using code 5-OFF-ADULT-CHILDREN. Register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping with trauma. First four weeks are free!
- Believing in You - Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn tools that will help you move forward to trust and joy once again.
- Healing Hearts - For couples seeking healing after betrayal. It emphasizes the development of empathy and integrity.
- Help. Her. Heal - For men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal.
- Choose 180 for Men - Support group for men to gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery.
- Choose Renewal - For women recovering from unwanted sexual behavior. Focus on recovery and healing from patterns of sexual acting out in a safe, nurturing community.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Amie Woolsey hosts this workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
- Should I Stay or Go? - Self-paced course designed to be a companion on your journey toward self-discovery and personal empowerment.
Connect with us:
Alana Gordon
Amie Woolsey
Choose Recovery Services
We all wear masks at times, but hiding your true self is exhausting and inauthentic. In this week’s episode we welcome back Luke Gordon. Luke opens up about his personal battles with hiding behind false versions of himself. He describes how he was finally able to deepen relationships when he stepped into vulnerability, integrity, and authenticity.
Listen to learn:
- What true authenticity is and isn’t
- How authenticity is “earned and learned”
- The reward in choosing short-term pain for long-term gains
- How to reach sustainable growth and peace within yourself
Referenced in this episode:
- Connect with Luke Gordon and book a session with him HERE.
Exciting Resources Coming Soon!
- Beyond the Facade Podcast - Subscribe to this new podcast by Luke Gordon. Learn more about authenticity and the struggle to be real with ourselves and others as you build meaningful relationships. Subscribe now and watch for the first episode in May!
- In-person Intensive: Unmasked: Paths to Authentic Masculinity - This is a three-day live intensive for men led by Alana and Luke Gordon. This program is designed to help men delve deep into understanding integrity, unveiling layers of shame, and reclaiming their authentic selves. Intensive will be held May 16-18, 2024 in Spanish Fork, UT. Learn more and register HERE.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - This betrayal trauma support group is for men who have been betrayed. New group beginning soon!
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping with the symptoms of trauma. First four weeks are free!
- Believing in You - Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn tools that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again.
- Healing Hearts - This group is for couples seeking healing after betrayal. It emphasizes the development of empathy, integrity, and authentic intimacy.
- Help. Her. Heal - This program is for men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Choose Renewal - For women recovering from unwanted sexual behavior. Focus on recovery and healing from patterns of sexual acting out in a safe, nurturing community.
- Resilient Teens - Ongoing support group for teens ages 15-18 whose parents have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
- Adult Children Uniting for Healing - Ongoing support group for adult children of parents who have experienced betrayal in their marriage and who need support navigating their own experience with betrayal.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Amie Woolsey hosts this workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
- Should I Stay or Go? - Self-paced course designed to be a companion on your journey toward self-discovery and personal empowerment.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon
Amie Woolsey
Choose Recovery Services
Your body is keeping secrets - traumatic memories and intense emotions locked away at a cellular level. In this episode, Amie and Alana dive into the science of how the body “keeps the score,” storing experiences that your conscious mind has disconnected from. Learn how to unlock your body’s innate wisdom to truly heal.
Listen to learn:
- How emotions and memories are stored in the body, not just the brain
- The science behind why the body “keeps the score” on traumatic events
- Practical ways to get back in touch with your body’s signals
- The value of having supportive people for regulating the nervous system
Referenced in this episode:
- The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk
- Quit Moralizing Your Emotions! - past podcast episode
- Is Ketamine Right For Me? - past podcast episode
- Should I Stay or Go? - Amie’s self-paced guide for helping you explore what choice is right for you
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping with the symptoms of trauma. First four weeks are free!
- Believing in You - In this program Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn tools that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again.
- Healing Hearts - This group is for couples seeking healing after betrayal. It emphasizes the development of empathy, integrity, and authentic intimacy.
- Help. Her. Heal - This program is for men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - This betrayal trauma support group is for men who have been betrayed. They will receive resources to recover from betrayal trauma while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Choose Renewal - For women recovering from unwanted sexual behavior. Focus on recovery and healing from patterns of sexual acting out in a safe, nurturing community.
- Resilient Teens - Ongoing support group for teens ages 15-18 whose parents have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
- Adult Children Uniting for Healing - Ongoing support group for adult children of parents who have experienced betrayal in their marriage and who need support navigating their own experience with betrayal.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Amie Woolsey hosts this workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
- Should I Stay or Go? - Self-paced course designed to be a companion on your journey toward self-discovery and personal empowerment.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Imagine being able to rewire your brain to heal from the devastation of betrayal trauma and PTSD. Many who have tried ketamine say they have done just that. On this episode, Alana explains what ketamine is and how it can help receptors in your brain work together to promote healing from the pain of trauma. Listen in as Alana shares her experience with ketamine and the insight and healing she gained from this treatment.
Listen to learn:
- What ketamine is and how it’s used to treat PTSD
- How ketamine can increase your brain’s neuroplasticity
- The potential benefits of using ketamine as a tool for healing
- The importance of utilizing multiple tools and modalities during recovery
Starting Soon!
- Healing Hearts - This group is for couples healing after betrayal. It emphasizes the development of empathy, integrity, and authentic intimacy. Learn practical tools and skills in a caring environment that fosters relational growth. Group begins April 3rd. Learn more and register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping with the symptoms of trauma. First four weeks are free!
- Believing in You - In this program Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn tools that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again.
- Healing Hearts - This group is for couples seeking healing after betrayal. It emphasizes the development of empathy, integrity, and authentic intimacy.
- Help. Her. Heal - This program is for men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - This betrayal trauma support group led by Hali Roderick is for men who have been betrayed. They will receive resources to recover from betrayal trauma while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Choose Renewal - For women recovering from unwanted sexual behavior. Focus on recovery and healing from patterns of sexual acting out in a safe, nurturing community.
- Resilient Teens - Ongoing support group for teens ages 15-18 whose parents have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
- Adult Children Uniting for Healing - Ongoing support group for adult children of parents who have experienced betrayal in their marriage and need support navigating their own experience with betrayal.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Amie Woolsey hosts this workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
- Should I Stay or Go? - Self-paced course designed to be a companion on your journey toward self-discovery and personal empowerment.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Are you constantly judging your emotions as good or bad? Do you feel guilty for experiencing “negative” feelings? In this episode, Amie dives deep into the tendency we often have of moralizing our emotions. Learn why it’s important to notice and name your feelings, to become aware of when you might be suppressing emotions, and how to embrace all of your emotions with self-compassion.
Listen to learn:
- Why moralizing emotions is unhealthy
- Practical tips to increase awareness of when you’re moralizing your feelings
- How to separate your self-worth from your emotional experiences
- Techniques for making peace with the full range of human emotions
Referenced in this episode:
- Feelings Wheel
- Amie’s Offerings: Believing In You; Intimacy Within; Should I Stay or Go?; or book a consultation HERE
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help coping with the symptoms of trauma. First four weeks are free!
- Believing in You - In this program Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn tools that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again.
- Healing Hearts - This group is for couples seeking healing after betrayal. It emphasizes the development of empathy, integrity, and authentic intimacy.
- Help. Her. Heal - This program is for men seeking to learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - This betrayal trauma support group led by Hali Roderick is for men who have been betrayed. They will receive resources to recover from betrayal trauma while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Choose Renewal - For women recovering from unwanted sexual behavior. Focus on recovery and healing from patterns of sexual acting out in a safe, nurturing community.
- Resilient Teens - Ongoing support group for teens ages 15-18 whose parents have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
- Adult Children Uniting for Healing - Ongoing support group for adult children of parents who have experienced betrayal in their marriage and need support navigating their own experience with betrayal.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Amie Woolsey hosts this workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
- Should I Stay or Go? - Self-paced course designed to be a companion on your journey toward self-discovery and personal empowerment.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Have you ever felt so overwhelmed by the damage caused by your addiction that giving up seemed like the only option? In this episode, Luke Gordon, cofounder and coach at Choose Recovery Services, as well as a father in recovery, opens up about grappling with feelings of hopelessness when facing attachment wounds inflicted on his children because of his addictive behaviors.
Amie, Alana, and Luke discuss the crucial work of healing your own attachment trauma while simultaneously repairing the parent-child bond.
Listen to learn:
- Why addicts must examine their own attachment wounds and heal from them
- How to balance doing inner work while also parenting authentically
- The important role that repair plays in relationships
- How to overcome hopelessness, feelings of failure, and perfectionism so you can heal yourself and your relationships
Referenced in this episode:
- Now, Discover Your Strengths - book
- A.R.E. You There For Me? - past podcast episode
- Attachment Assessment - find out your attachment style
- Divorce 101 - Amie’s self-paced guide to learn the next wise steps for you
- Intimacy From Within - Amie’s self-paced course that leads couples through the seven levels of intimacy
Starting Soon!
- Dating From Within - Learn to date yourself first! This workshop will help you know if you are ready to date again, understand how you’re showing up in relationships, tips and tricks for dating, and what a healthy relationship looks like. The next workshop is March 28th-30th. Register HERE.
- Healing Hearts - This group is for couples seeking healing after betrayal. It emphasizes the development of empathy, integrity, and authentic intimacy. Learn practical tools and skills in a caring environment that fosters relational growth. Group begins April 3rd. Learn more and register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Support for women for women who have recently experienced betrayal. First four weeks are free!.
- Believing in You - In this program Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn how to move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again.
- Healing Hearts - This group is for couples seeking healing after betrayal.
- Help. Her. Heal - This program helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Support group led by Hali Roderick for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Resilient Teens - Ongoing support group for teens ages 15-18 whose parents have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
- Adult Children Uniting for Healing - Ongoing support group for adult children of parents who have experienced betrayal in their marriage and need support navigating their own experience.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
This week we are excited to welcome Luke Gordon to the podcast! Luke is an emotional health coach and cofounder of Choose Recovery Services who specializes in helping men overcome unwanted sexual compulsive behaviors.
Luke shares how disruptions in our earliest childhood attachments form the foundation for later challenges like addiction, unhealthy coping mechanisms, and struggles with emotional intimacy. With raw vulnerability, Luke shares his own journey and provides insight into the harrowing yet rewarding work of exploring attachment wounds and family dynamics.
Listen to learn:
- How early childhood wounds can manifest in relationships at all stages of life
- How generational patterns can be linked to current behaviors
- Techniques for exploring your attachment story honestly without blaming or villainizing your caregivers
- The role of professional support in providing a safe space to do this vulnerable work
Referenced in this episode:
- It Didn’t Start WIth You: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle by Mark Wolynn
- Learn more about Luke and book a session with him HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and need help coping. First four weeks are free!.
- Believing in You - Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn to move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again.
- Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
- Help. Her. Heal - This program helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills needed to begin healing a broken relationship.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Resilient Teens - Ongoing support group for teens ages 15-18 whose parents have experienced betrayal in their marriage.
- Adult Children Uniting for Healing - Ongoing support group for adult children of parents who have experienced betrayal in their marriage and need support navigating their own experience with betrayal.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Amie Woolsey hosts this workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
When parents have experienced betrayal in their relationship, the entire family system is impacted. Teens and young adults are old enough to sense things are amiss, but may not understand everything that’s happening in their parents’ world.
In today’s episode we are excited to welcome Morgan Ellsworth, a life coach at Choose Recovery Services. She is an APSATS trainee and has training as a DBT Skills Coach. Morgan shares her story of navigating her teenage years in an environment touched by betrayal trauma. She offers practical advice to ensure teens and young adults receive the attention and care they need so they can process their experience and begin to heal.
Listen to learn:
- What parental betrayal felt like from a teenager’s perspective
- How support groups were helpful in Morgan’s healing
- Specific things parents can do to help their children work through their emotions and experience
- Things to watch out for that may alienate your children during this time
Referenced in this episode:
- Learn more about Morgan and book a session with her HERE.
- Morgan’s two support groups - Adult Children Uniting for Healing and Resilient Teens. Both classes help participants process, share their experience, and learn coping skills.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 4 weeks.
- Believing in You - In this program Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn key principles, tools, and concepts that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again.
- Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
- Help. Her. Heal for Men - This program helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills needed to begin healing a broken relationship.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Amie Woolsey hosts this workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
We know attachment can suffer between partners when there’s been betrayal or trauma, but how are our kids’ attachments impacted? In today’s episode, Amie and Alana unpack how to be a solid anchor for your children during hard times. Learn how to be grounded, regulated, and vulnerable to help your children stay securely attached to you even amidst chaos or crisis.
Listen to learn:
- How doing your own healing work enhances your children’s ability to form secure attachments
- Why staying regulated in your own emotions can help your children with their big emotions
- What balance and repair look like and why they are important
- Why being vulnerable with your kids helps them process their emotions in healthy ways
Referenced in this episode:
- Past episodes on children and pornography: When Your Child is Also Struggling With Pornography Use and Talking to Your Kids About Pornography…On Purpose!
- Past episodes on attachment: Attachment Theory - When It’s Helpful and When It’s Not; A.R.E. You There For Me? and Is It Me? Is It Him?
- Believing in You - In this course Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn key principles, tools, and concepts that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again. Learn more HERE.
Coming Up!
- Help.Her.Heal - This course helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills needed to begin healing a broken relationship. Learn more about the course and register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
- Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Amie Woolsey hosts this workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Do you ever feel tangled up in knots trying to understand where your relationship pain stems from? How can you tell if your pain is coming from childhood attachment wounds or current betrayal trauma? This week Amie and Alana help us learn how to unravel old and new attachment knots and walk us through what we can do to feel secure again in our relationships and in trusting ourselves.
Listen to learn:
- Why believing your body’s signals is crucial, especially in the beginning stages of healing
- How to determine the difference between childhood vs. relational attachment wounds
- How boundaries can transform inner turmoil into empowerment
- How professional help can bring support and clarity to your healing journey
Coming Up!
Help.Her.Heal - This course helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills needed to begin healing a broken relationship. Two sessions will be beginning soon. Learn more about the course and register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
- Believing in You - In this program Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn key principles, tools, and concepts that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again.
- Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
- Help. Her. Heal for Men - This program helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills needed to begin healing a broken relationship.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Amie Woolsey hosts this workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Have you ever felt disconnected, even when your partner is right beside you? In these situations, ask yourself, “A.R.E. you there for me?” Amie and Alana break down the acronym "A.R.E." to give you a tool to help you set the foundation for meaningful bonds, communication and attachment. Learn how to deepen your connection so you can be there for others and for yourself.
Listen to learn:
- What A.R.E. stands for
- How being accessible, responsive, and engaged can help you increase emotional connections
- The difference between cognitive and emotional empathy (and why it matters!)
- How to cultivate true presence and interest in your partner
Referenced in this episode:
- Mama Trauma Series - Part I, Part II, Part III, Part IV
- Atlas of the Heart by Brené Brown
- Believing in You - In this course Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn key principles, tools, and concepts that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again. Learn more HERE.
Coming Up!
- Help.Her.Heal - This course helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills needed to begin healing a broken relationship. Two sessions will be beginning soon. Learn more about the course and register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
- Believing in You - In this program Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn key principles, tools, and concepts that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again.
- Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Amie Woolsey hosts this workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Do you crave deep connection but struggle to let partners in? Have you ever accused loved ones of being distant when they simply needed space? These behaviors could stem from your attachment style. Join Amie and Alana as they delve into attachment theory and how our attachment styles formed in childhood become blueprints for our relationships throughout our lives.
Listen to learn:
- What the four styles of attachment are
- Ways in which trauma and inconsistent parenting can breed anxiety
- How your attachment style impacts the ways you show up in your relationships
- How understanding your attachment style can help you connect deeper to those around you
Referenced in this episode:
- The Attachment Project - Find out your attachment style
- Believing in You - In this course Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn key principles, tools, and concepts that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again. Learn more HERE.
Coming Up!
- Help.Her.Heal - This course helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills needed to begin healing a broken relationship. Two sessions will be beginning soon. Learn more about the course and register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
- Believing in You - In this program Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn key principles, tools, and concepts that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again.
- Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
- Dating From Within - Amie Woolsey hosts this workshop which teaches you how to date yourself first. Learn how to know if you are ready to date again and what a healthy relationship looks like.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Trust is essential in healthy relationships, yet it is shattered by betrayal. Rebuilding that broken trust can feel impossible. In this episode, Alana tackles head-on the messy complexities around trust after betrayal. She offers insight into power imbalances, avoiding the dangerous “floating saint” trap, boundary setting, embracing imperfection, and more. With patience, help, and healing, you can learn to trust again.
Listen to learn:
- How power differentials play into trust
- How an understanding of betrayal violence can give you a framework for thinking about trust
- What a “floating saint” is and how this can unintentionally create more mistrust
- The role of authenticity when working to cultivate trust
Referenced in this episode:
- Past episodes on trust: Trusting Yourself First and Building Trust in the Relationship
- What is Betrayal Violence? - Past episode with Hope Ray from the Betrayal Violence Institute
- “Are You On the Coaster?” - YouTube video from Dr. Jake Porter
- Past episodes on boundaries: Beginning Boundaries Starting With Me, Boundaries and Why I Must Own My Reality, and Boundaries and Non-Negotiables
Coming Up!
- Help.Her.Heal - This course helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills needed to begin healing a broken relationship. Two sessions will be beginning soon. Learn more about the course and register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
- Believing in You - In this program Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn key principles, tools, and concepts that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again.
- Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
If you’ve experienced betrayal in a relationship then you know what it’s like to feel rejected by your partner. But are you aware of ways you may be rejecting YOURSELF? In this episode, Amie sheds light on the topic of self-rejection. Learn what self-rejection is, how it shows up in our thoughts and actions, and what you can do to overcome this barrier to healing and connection.
Listen to learn:
- How self-rejection may stem from childhood patterns
- The many ways that self-rejection can manifest
- How to use the three pillars of self-coaching to combat self-rejection
- Why it’s important to shift your mindset to self-acceptance
Referenced in this episode:
- Deconstructing Gaslighting Podcast with Sarah Morales
- Believing in You - In this course Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn key principles, tools, and concepts that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again. Learn more HERE.
Intimacy Within Self Paced Course- Connecting back towards YOU after betrayal . One step at a time. Amie walks you through all 7 levels of intimacy and how to cultivate within yourself FIRST.
Coming Up!
- Honoring Our Bodies Through Awareness and Nutrition - Join this FREE webinar hosted by Jori Pena to learn more about nutrition and how trauma affects the body. Gain insight on connecting to your body, nutrition, body scans, meditation, and more! Webinar will be on January 23, 2024. Register HERE.
- Help.Her.Heal - This course helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills needed to begin healing a broken relationship. Two sessions will be beginning soon. Learn more about the course and register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
- Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Am I enough? Am I worthy of connection? Am I worthy of love? If you have found yourself asking these questions, then you will want to listen in as Amie and Alana and their guest, Jess Kovic, talk all about shame. Jess is a certified life coach, APSATS trainee, Brainspotting practitioner, and fellow team member at Choose Recovery Services. Jess helps us dive deep into the shame surrounding betrayal - how it shows up, why it sticks around, and most importantly, how you can shed it.
Listen to learn:
- How to identify misplaced shame
- How perfectionism and shame are connected
- The distinction between keeping things private vs hiding
- Tools to use as you work to leave shame behind
Referenced in this episode:
- Connect with Jess Kovic at Choose Recovery Services or on Instagram @itsjesskovic
Coming Up!
- Honoring Our Bodies Through Awareness and Nutrition - Join this FREE webinar hosted by Jori Pena to learn more about nutrition and how trauma affects the body. Gain insight on connecting to your body, nutrition, body scans, meditation, and more! Webinar will be on January 23, 2024. Register HERE.
- Help.Her.Heal - This course helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills needed to begin healing a broken relationship. Two sessions will be beginning soon. Learn more about the course and register HERE.
- Believing in You - In this course Amie teaches you how to work WITH your brain instead of against it. Learn key principles, tools, and concepts that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again. Learn more HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
Intimacy Within Self Paced Course - A Guide to learning how to connect back towards you through 7 levels of intimacy. Discover how to take up space, trust your instincts, honor your emotions, connect with your higher self, and gain a deeper understanding of yourself than ever before.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Although he’s always eager to take you for a twirl on the dance floor, Walter isn’t the dance partner you want. His toxic tango can cause you to constantly trip up in your relationships. So who is this Walter guy? WALTER is an acronym representing the unhealthy communication behaviors we often fall into despite our best intentions.
In this week’s episode, Amie and Alana share examples from their own lives of times they’ve danced with Walter, and they give you ideas of how you can ditch Walter for good and learn to relate to others in healthier ways.
Listen to learn:
- What WALTER stands for
- Examples of dancing with Walter to avoid
- What the window of tolerance is
- The benefits of staying in the window of tolerance
- What to do when Walter keeps asking you to dance
Referenced in this episode:
- Window of Tolerance PDF
- Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman
- Believing in You - In this course Amie teaches you how to work with your brain instead of against it. Learn key principles, tools, and concepts that will help you move forward to trust, love, empowerment, and finding joy once again. Learn more HERE.
Coming up!
- Honoring Our Bodies Through Awareness and Nutrition - Join this FREE webinar hosted by Jori Pena to learn more about nutrition and how trauma affects the body. Gain insight on connecting to your body, nutrition, body scans, meditation, and more! Webinar will be on January 23, 2024. Register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
- Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
- Help. Her. Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills needed to begin healing a broken relationship.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Betrayal cuts deep, and that wound causes intense pain and heartache. In this episode, Alana talks about why betrayal is so traumatic. She walks us through the three main areas that betrayal attacks and outlines the six stages of healing. Listen to understand more about the strong emotions you may feel as you’re recovering from betrayal and how that’s a normal and expected part of healing.
Listen to learn:
- Why betrayal is so traumatic
- How betrayal trauma impacts your attachment, your emotions, and your intimacy
- The results of experiencing “betrayal blindness”
- The importance of healing individually and relationally
- How to understand the six stages of healing and where you are in those stages
Referenced in this episode:
- The Betrayal Bind - book by Michelle Mays
- Diving Into Full Disclosures - past podcast episode
- Polygraphs Better Understood - past podcast episode
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
- Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
- Help. Her. Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills needed to begin healing a broken relationship.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
- Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Happy Holidays! Alana and I are so grateful to all you listeners and feel so blessed to hear from all of you and the support you feel from this podcast.
Many of you will write in and kindly assume that we have it all together, so today we thought we'd show you just how much we don't!
Head over to our YouTube channel to watch Alana and I listen to our blooper reel as well. We hope this gives you a much needed laugh in the middle of your hard.
We know you do hard things and know that you can continue to do hard things and we are here to support you along the way.
Keep CHOOSING YOU!
xo
Amie & Alana
Referenced in this episode:
- Choose Recovery Services YouTube channel
Don’t Miss Out!
- Help. Her. Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship. Next session starts January 8th. Register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
- Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
- Help. Her. Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills needed to begin healing a broken relationship.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
- Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
When you have experienced trauma or betrayal, grief and sadness feel like constant companions. Kim Brown, a grief educator, APSATS candidate, and certified betrayal trauma coach at Choose Recovery Services joins Amie and Alana this week to help us understand more about grief and its significance in our healing journey. If you find yourself constantly trying to ignore your grief or push it aside to deal with later, listen up to learn about what you can do to actually integrate grief into your life in healthy, healing ways.
Listen to learn:
- The six things grief needs from you
- How to live in grief while healing
- The importance of feeling and expressing emotions as they arise
- The things grief can teach you if you let it
Referenced in this episode:
- Connect with Kim at Choose Recovery Services
- Follow Kim on Instagram @kimbrown.coach
- Find Kim in the grief.com directory
- Intimacy Within Self Paced Course- Creating healthy intimacy with your partner begins with creating healthy intimacy within. This self-paced course and guidebook will walk you through all 7 levels of intimacy. As you practice the tools and skills offered you will not only gain awareness around what healthy looks like, but what healthy looks like for YOU! Come back towards you today.
Don’t Miss Out!
- Help. Her. Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship. Next session starts January 8th. Register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
- Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
- Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
“I have to do it all! I have to BE it all!” If you often find yourself thinking these things, then this episode is for you! Amie and Alana share practical tips for finding balance amidst the seasonal chaos. If you feel overwhelmed and pressured to make the holidays (or any days!) picture-perfect, this episode will give you permission to do less of what doesn’t matter so you can do more of what does.
Listen to learn:
- How to determine what traditions really matter this year
- The perils of overscheduling
- How to avoid the urge to give up and do nothing
- How to embrace modifying or skipping traditions if necessary
- The importance of seeking help without embarrassment if you need support
Referenced in this episode:
- Intimacy Within Self Paced Course- Creating healthy intimacy with your partner begins with creating healthy intimacy within. This self-paced course and guidebook will walk you through all 7 levels of intimacy. As you practice the tools and skills offered you will not only gain awareness around what healthy looks like, but what healthy looks like for YOU! Come back towards you today.
Don’t Miss Out!
- Help. Her. Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship. Next session starts January 8th. Register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
- Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
- Help. Her. Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills needed to begin healing a broken relationship.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
- Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
The holidays can be a tricky time under the best of circumstances, but in the aftermath of a betrayal, they can feel impossible. This week’s episode offers a no-nonsense guide to surviving the holiday season. If you’re tempted to run and hide during these upcoming weeks, listen in on this Road to Recovery webinar as Alana and Luke throw you a lifeline. The tools they share can help you navigate through this season of triggers and turmoil and give you hope as you launch into the new year.
Road to Recovery webinars are held on the last Sunday of each month and are FREE! Click HERE to register for the next webinar.
Listen to learn:
- Ten practical tips to put into practice today to set you up for success
- How to manage expectations vs. reality this holiday season
- Tools for handling in-laws and family gatherings
- Mindset shifts that can accelerate healing
Referenced in this episode:
- YouTube video - Conversations: Enmeshment with Ken Adams
- Love sculpture by Alexander Milov
- Past podcast episodes - Four-part series on therapeutic separation - Part 1; Part 2; Part 3; Part 4
- Dr. Omar Minwalla’s work on the secret sexual basement
More from Choose Recovery Services
Help. Her. Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship. Next session starts January 8th. Register HERE.
Intimacy Within Self-Paced Course- Creating healthy intimacy with your partner begins with creating healthy intimacy within. This self-paced course and guidebook will walk you through all 7 levels of intimacy. As you practice the skills offered, you will not only gain awareness around what healthy looks like, but what healthy looks like for YOU! Come back towards you today.
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma. Free for the first 6 weeks.
Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step toward recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
After nearly two decades of marriage, Staci Somes found herself at a crossroads far too many women face: should I stay or should I go? Join Amie and Alana as they talk with Staci, a licensed professional counselor and coach at Choose Recovery Services. In this raw and vulnerable conversation, Staci shares her personal journey of betrayal and the growth and healing that can be found on the other side.
Listen to learn:
- How to tell when it’s time to leave a partnership that isn’t working
- What you can learn by noticing patterns in your relationship
- What growth after betrayal can look like
- How to reconnect with your core gifts and sense of self after trauma
Referenced in this episode:
- Learn more about Staci and her work at Choose Recovery Services HERE.
- Connect with Staci on Instagram HERE.
- Amie’s Divorce 101 Guide: When You’ve Exhausted ALL Other Options - My goal with this guide is to EMPOWER you to become the decision-maker in your life by helping you connect back towards you. After all, you have the power to shape your future. Let's slow the process down and take it one step at a time. I'm committed to walking alongside you on this journey. I promise you, it does get better.
More from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Intimacy Within Self Paced Course- Creating healthy intimacy with your partner begins with creating healthy intimacy within. This self paced course and guidebook will walk you through all 7 levels of intimacy and as you practice the tools and skills offered you will not only gain awareness around what healthy looks like, but what healthy looks like for YOU! Come back towards you today.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Do you ever feel like you have to pretend to be happy in your relationship? Are you tired of hiding your true feelings just to keep the peace? Join Amie and Alana as they talk about the problems of inauthenticity and the benefits of embracing and expressing your real thoughts and emotions.
Listen to learn:
- What authenticity is and why it is important in healing relationships
- The problem with feeling like you have to pretend with your partner
- How drawing four circles on a piece of paper can help you tap into your higher self
- What the benefits are of slowing things down and getting curious
Referenced in this episode:
- Brené Brown’s work
- Altogether You by Jenna Riemersma
- No Bad Parts by Richard Schwartz
More from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Intimacy Within Self Paced Course- Creating healthy intimacy with your partner begins with creating healthy intimacy within. This self paced course and guidebook will walk you through all 7 levels of intimacy and as you practice the tools and skills offered you will not only gain awareness around what healthy looks like, but what healthy looks like for YOU! Come back towards you today.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Have you ever heard of the term radical self-care? Join Amie today as she uses this concept to encourage you to prepare for the up and coming holiday months so that you can be the CHOOSER of your experiences.
Here is what she will cover:
- What is radical self-care?
- The importance of deep, intentional self-care.
- The first pillar: Awareness, including identifying beliefs, values, desires, fears, and unresolved emotions.
- Living in alignment with core values during the holiday season.
- Setting realistic expectations.
- Transformational acceptance and embracing the reality of change and grief.
- Healing emotional wounds and trauma.
- Challenging and replacing limiting beliefs.
- The pillar of agency and the importance of setting boundaries.
- Choosing to feel grief when facing changes.
- Taking a holistic approach to well-being.
- Giving yourself permission to pause and reflect.
- Choosing how you want to show up during the holidays.
- Becoming the chooser and freeing yourself from external expectations.
Believing In You Coaching Membership with Amie is a great way to take your healing to the next level. Find out more HERE
More from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
Connecting Back Towards YOU; Intimacy Within Self-Paced Course where you will be guided through all 7 levels of intimacy and learn how to create healthy within, FIRST!
Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Divorce 101 Guide: Feeling stuck in deciding? Not sure where to even start if you do? I got you, Check out my self paced guide to help you get clear with YOUR decision in the next right step for you, right now.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Candidate
Choose Recovery Services
While couples may go through therapeutic disclosures, what about the children? They also notice problems and are able to sense when things are off. Today Amie talks with Dr. Anthony Walker, a Choose Recovery coach trained in Brainspotting and the Multidimensional Partner Trauma Model through APSATS. Dr. Walker and Amie explore the what, when, and how of family disclosures as an important step in healing.
Be sure to listen to the end of the episode to hear Dr. Walker share several characteristics of healthy families which can be a helpful framework as you work to strengthen your family relationships.
Listen to learn:
- What is family disclosure and how do you know if it’s something you even need?
- How does family disclosure differ from a couple’s therapeutic disclosure?
- How to approach family disclosure when children are at different ages and developmental stages?
- Tips for handling family disclosure when a child doesn’t want to be involved in the conversation.
- How to know when the timing is right (or wrong) for a family disclosure.
Referenced in this episode:
- Learn more about Dr. Anthony Walker and book a complimentary session HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Join Amie today as she shares an episode from her Empowered Divorce Podcast where she talks about the importance of healing from betrayal by BELIEVING your body.
Your body's memory is an integral part of trauma that goes way beyond the cognitive part of your brain. The body holds so much memory and it influences your physical health, emotional wellbeing, and behavior. Acknowledging and addressing this aspect of trauma is vital to your overall healing. Trauma isn't just a psychological issue. It's a physiological one as well. To truly heal, it is essential to address the impact that trauma has on the body and allow for that integration of mind and body in the recovery journey.
To hear other episodes from Amie about Believing In You subscribe to The Empowered Divorce Podcast:
Believing Your Lived Experience
Believing In YOU; Sitting with Cognitive Dissonance
Want to learn more about Amie's Signature Coaching Program? Click HERE or go to chooserecoverservices.com
Referenced in this episode:
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk
Information on gaslighting with Sarah Morales
More from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
We are excited to welcome Darcy Haas to the podcast today! Darcy is an RN who practices functional medicine and nutrition. She focuses on helping women address the root causes of their physical health issues. Darcy shares her own experience with betrayal trauma and her resulting health problems leading her to study and learn more about how chronic stress and trauma can physically impact the body.
Listen to learn:
- What happens physically when our stress response is activated far longer than intended
- The impact of chronic stress and trauma on the body
- The importance of investing in your own healing
- Where can you start if you feel some physical symptoms could be trauma-related
Referenced in this episode:
- Connect with Darcy Haas on her website - Sit With Me Functional Nutrition
- Sign up HERE to receive Darcy’s top ten tips to focus on in your healing journey
- Connecting Back Towards YOU; Intimacy Within Self-Paced Course where you will be guided through all 7 levels of intimacy and learn how to create healthy within, FIRST!
Check it out HERE ad start connecting back towards YOU today.
More from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Divorce 101 Guide: Feeling stuck in deciding? Not sure where to even start if you do? I got you, Check out my self paced guide to meet you where you are at in the journey and help you get clear with YOUR decision in the next right step for you, right now.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Candidate
Choose Recovery Services
Do you ever wonder if constant triggers mean you’re stuck and not healing? While trauma triggers may last a lifetime, you can learn skills to decrease their intensity and frequency. Amie and Alana have a candid discussion about how to think about triggers, trust your inner wisdom, and rewire your brain’s reactions so you can heal, thrive, and appreciate the parts of yourself that are simply trying to protect you.
Listen to learn:
- How to find safety within your body
- How to understand the root causes of triggers
- The importance of developing resiliency
- The benefits of surrounding yourself with a strong support system
Referenced in this episode:
- Kristin Neff’s work on self-compassion
- Believing In You Coaching Program- The next openings will be available November 8th, just in time to get you through the holidays and into the new year with tools and learning to help you heal, thrive and BELIEVE in yourself again. Click the link HERE to get your spot; they are limited. If you are not sure if you are ready, please book a session with Amie, and she can guide you to the next right step for you in your healing journey.
More from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Join us and our guest Dr. Don St John, Ph.D as he shares his 4 pillars of healing from trauma.
Here is what you will gain:
Dr. St John's Trauma Background:
- Dr. St John's personal history of trauma and abuse.
- Realization of the need for healing in his own life.
- Understanding the importance of addressing both the mind and body in the healing process.
The Four Pillars of Healing Trauma:
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Somatic Healing:
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The importance of reconnecting with the body.
- The impact of trauma on the body's tissues and consciousness.
-
Various somatic healing methods, including yoga and structural integration.
-
Psychological and Emotional Healing:
-
Uncovering and challenging beliefs formed around traumatic experiences.
- The fear of taking risks again after trauma.
-
The role of psychotherapy in healing psychological and emotional wounds.
-
Relational Healing:
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The significance of healthy relationships in healing.
- Balancing self-protection with the need for connection.
-
The importance of vulnerability, compassion, and communication in relationships.
-
Spiritual Healing:
-
Finding a sense of self beyond one's ego.
- Reflecting a higher power to connect with one's higher self.
- Understanding that we are all interconnected.
Referenced in this episode:
Dr. Don St John’s website
Dr. Don St John’s book - Healing the Wounds of Childhood and Culture
Book a session with Choose Recovery Services at www.chooserecoveryservices.com
More from Choose Recovery Services
Believing In You Coaching Program With Amie Woolsey
Divorce 101 Self Paced Guide: When you feel stuck in the "Should I Stay Or Should I Go"
Should I Stay Or Go Free Group Coaching Session with Amie Woolsey Thursday 9am MT
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - Weekly support group for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma. Free for the first 6 weeks.
Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery couples to learn valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step toward recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
-
Why Relational Recovery?
- Stephanie shares her personal journey and how it led her to become passionate about relational recovery.
- The transformation she experienced in her own life after partner betrayal.
- The importance of helping others experience positive transformations in their lives.
-
The Possibility of Healing
-
Discussing the possibility of healing and recovery in relationships.
- Highlighting the need for both partners to be willing and invested in the process.
- Emphasizing that relational repair requires commitment and mutual growth.
-
The Role of Empathy in Relational Healing
-
Exploring empathy as an essential element in healing.
- Addressing the misconception that empathy is an inherent trait and how it can be learned.
- The value of empathy in partner sensitivity and the healing process.
-
Couples Work vs. Coaching
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Evaluating the difference between couples therapy and coaching in the context of relational recovery.
- Discussing the benefits of early couples recovery work, psychoeducation, and skill-building.
- Emphasizing the importance of finding properly trained coaches and therapists.
-
Safety and Stability Before Couples Work
-
Recognizing the significance of safety and stability before engaging in deeper relational work.
- The role of individual work in achieving safety and stability.
- The need for foundational healing and learning before progressing to couples work.
- Want to book a session with Choose Recovery Services?
Go to www.chooserecoveryservices.com
Believing In You Coaching Program With Amie Woolsey
Divorce 101 Self Paced Guide: When you feel stuck in the "Should I Stay Or Should I Go"
Should I Stay Or Go Free Group Coaching Session with Amie Woolsey Thursday 9am MT
More from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
What You'll Learn
- What is differentiation
- Why its helpful to learn how to differentiate
- Why both spouses need to do this work
Referenced in this episode:
In this podcast episode, Alana reflects on her graduate school experience and provides updates on their podcast. She discusses her initial exposure to Murray Bowen's model of Bowen theory as she delves into her own personal discoveries about differentiation in therapy. Alana shares how she struggled with maintaining her identity while emotionally connecting with others, highlighting the concept of differentiation.
The episode emphasizes the importance of differentiation in healthy relationships by allowing individuals to preserve their identity while remaining emotionally connected to their partner. We learn that differentiation enhances emotional resilience, improves conflict resolution, and prevents emotional fusion/enmeshment. Alana emphasizes the importance of healthy boundaries and the ability to navigate the challenges of long-term relationships while dispelling misconceptions about detachment.
Want to book a session with Choose Recovery Services?
Go to www.chooserecoveryservices.com
Believing In You Coaching Program With Amie Woolsey
More from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
Do you find yourself saying, “I’m fine” when you’re not? Join Amie and Alana as they explore why we try to convince ourselves and others that we are okay when we’re actually struggling. Get ready to dig deeper into what your “I’m fine” response is really trying to communicate.
Listen to learn:
- How to get curious when you find yourself saying you’re fine even when you’re not
- How to recognize “pink flags” so you can gain awareness around these patterns
- Why it’s important to feel your feelings and not just think about them
- What to do if you discover it’s really not fine, and you’re not okay
Referenced in this episode:
- Why We Need to FEEL Our Feelings - past podcast episode
- Dating From Within: Divorce to Empowered Dating Workshop - This three-day course led by Amie will help you take charge of your post-divorce dating journey. Learn how to date yourself first, how to know when you’re ready to date again, tips and tricks to use when dating, and so much more. Workshop will be October 12-14th. Register HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Do you spend endless hours trying to diagnose your partner and obsessing over their intentions and motivations? In this week's episode, Amie and Alana are giving you permission to stop overanalyzing your partner and to shift the focus back to yourself. You'll walk away feeling empowered, with insight into where to direct your energy during your recovery journey.
Tune in to learn:
- How the confusion of analyzing your partner can drain your energy
- Why the impact of your partner’s behavior matters more than their intent or diagnosis
- How shifting your locus of control to yourself can help you gain clarity
- Why talking to a professional coach or therapist can be so helpful
Referenced in this episode:
- What is Betrayal Violence, and How Does It Apply to Your Situation? With Hope Ray - past podcast episode
- Love You Now Conference hosted by Kaylee Dunn - Join Amie on September 22nd as she talks about what you can do when you have exhausted ALL options. Claim your FREE ticket HERE or to find out more check out @amiewoolsey
More from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Betrayal is painful enough, but what if your partner uses their recovery against you? This week we dive into the complicated dynamics of betrayers weaponizing their healing. Join Amie and Alana as they explore the nuances of weaponizing recovery work including what it is, how to spot it, why it happens, and how you can protect yourself.
*BIG disclaimer with this topic - weaponizing can go both ways, and this episode is not intended to be used against your partner either.
Listen to learn:
- Specific examples of what weaponizing recovery work looks like
- The difference between feeling hurt during your recovery journey and being injured
- How to tell if your partner is weaponizing recovery versus just being clumsy while learning new skills
- Steps you can take if you recognize these patterns in your relationship
Referenced in this episode:
- Deconstructing Gaslighting with Sarah Morales - Past Podcast Episode
More from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma, and is free for the first 6 weeks.
Healing Hearts - This 15-week couples course is a comprehensive program designed for early-recovery and healing couples to learn and experience valuable insights together. It focuses on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues or addiction.
Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick leads a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Choose Recovery Services
Join Alana Gordon and Hali Roderick as we talk about the need for men to gain the skill set on how to help their wife heal after betrayal if they want relational healing. If you would like to learn more about the Help Her Heal Course, go to www.chooserecoveryservices.com.
Help Her Heal for Men with Hali Roderick
https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/help-her-heal/
We are starting a new group called Help Her Heal, that teaches men about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. This group will offer resources modeled after the work of Carol Juergenson Sheets to help men rebuild lost trust and create intimacy. This group will begin September 11th, 2023, and will be held weekly on Mondays at 7:30pm MT.
Other Upcoming Groups
Healing Hearts for Couples
https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/healing-hearts/
Stephanie Hamby is starting a new course called Healing Hearts that offers a comprehensive program for couples in early recovery, focusing on partner betrayal trauma and sexual integrity issues. This course will allow couples to learn more about emotions, communication, boundaries, and how to address underlying issues. It starts on October 1st, and will be held weekly on Sundays at 5pm MT.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/empowerment-after-betrayal-men/
We are offering a support group for men who have been betrayed as we have noticed a lack of resources for men with this experience. This weekly, 90-minute support group will allow men to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while surrounding themselves in a supportive community. This group, Empowerment After Betrayal, will meet Mondays at 6pm MT.
Choose Healing for Betrayed Women https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/choose-healing-betrayal-trauma-support-for-women/
We are excited to offer more support to betrayed women with a free 6-week group, Choose Healing for Betrayed Women that serves as a helpful "first aid" for those who have just begun to navigate the difficult experience of betrayal trauma. This group meets weekly for 90 minutes, and we have multiple groups and coaches to fit different situations and preferences.
Social Media
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chooserecoveryservices/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ChooseRecoveryServices
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chooserecoveryservices
Helpful Links
Website: https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/
Meet the Coaches: https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/team/
Group Programs: https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/groups-2/
Courses: https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/courses-2/
Webinars: https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/webinars/
“It is time to define betrayal violence.” That is the message that our guest, Hope Ray, wants to offer today. Hope is a Licensed Professional Counselor, Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, and a Certified Hope and Freedom Practitioner. Listen to hear how Hope uses the term “betrayal violence” and how she feels those powerful words give a more thorough definition of the experience of betrayed partners.
In this episode you will learn:
- How Hope defines the word “violence” and applies that term to relational betrayal.
- What the partner adaptive bonding cycle is and the role it plays in relationships.
- The importance of intention when thinking about betrayal violence.
- The difference between betrayal violence and betrayal trauma and how both terms are useful.
- Why this framework and vocabulary can be so helpful during the process of rehabilitation.
Referenced in this episode:
- Betrayal Violence Institute
- Complex Partner Trauma Magazine
- Hope’s Instagram
- The Relationship Dynamic Assessment- This groundbreaking assessment created by Kimberly Day, LMHC, CCPS offers a very clear picture of the different domains where destructive behaviors exist in your relational experience. Amie is trained and qualified to give the assessment and help you process the results. For more information on how you can receive this incredible resource to help you gain more awareness to your lived experience and reality, click HERE.
More from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Healing- Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 6 weeks.
Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men- Hali Roderick is starting a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men- Support group for men who are ready to take the first step toward recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men- This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men- Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and camaraderie.
Road to Recovery- Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects that come along the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar- Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Should I Stay or Should I Go?- Amie Woolsey hosts this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
Empowered Divorce Q&A- Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
The Empowered Divorce Podcastwith Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning toward divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Choose Recovery Services
Last week we learned about the important role our nervous system plays in regulating our bodies. This week Amie and Alana are here to continue that conversation and to give you practical, tangible things you can do right now to help engage and relax your central nervous system.
Tune in to learn:
- What bodily discomfort may be telling you.
- What to remember if the work you’re doing seems NOT to be working.
- Specific strategies you can implement on your own to regulate your nervous system.
- Ways a professional can help you activate the vagus nerve.
- Some of the benefits you may experience as you keep your nervous system online.
Referenced in this episode:
- Body Love Class - This free, self-paced, online class helps you lean into an awareness of your body.
More from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks.
Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick is starting a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and comradery.
Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey teaches this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
The Empowered Divorce Podcastwith Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning towards divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
We are excited to welcome Psychotherapist and Betrayal Navigation Coach, KayLee Dunn, to this week’s episode of Choose to Be. KayLee talks through the brain science behind trauma and will help you better understand your body’s survival responses and how to turn them into your superpower. With relatable personal examples, relevant research, and empathy for your experience, this is a valuable episode you won’t want to miss!
Listen to Learn:
- What fight, flight, and freeze looks like and what you can do with it.
- How naming and noticing helps you begin to regulate yourself.
- Whether or not you can really heal after betrayal.
- What your inner survivor is.
- How your triggers and your inner survivor are a gift.
Mentioned in this Episode:
- Tiktok: @heykayleedunn
- KayLee’s Website: www.kayleedunn.com/
- Love You Now Conference: www.kayleedunn.com/loveyounow
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks.
- Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
- Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick is starting a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and comradery.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey teaches this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
- Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcastwith Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning towards divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
Choose Recovery Services
Many women suffering from betrayal not only emotionally detach from their partners, but they also detach from themselves. In preparation for next week’s episode with Mental Health Therapist, KayLee Dunn, Amie and Alana wanted to give you some ideas to think about, sit with, and journal on around the topic of emotional detachment. Listen to learn how you may be using emotional detachment as a coping mechanism while working through the devastating effects of betrayal.
Tune in to learn:
- How disassociating helps you self-protect
- How disassociating connects to your childhood
- Why you don’t want to numb any of your emotions
- What fight, flight, or freeze has to do with disassociating
- The importance of recognizing how and where detachment is showing up for you
Referenced in this episode:
- Why We Need to Feel Our Feelings - Past Podcast Episode
- How We Feel App
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks.
- Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship. Empowerment After Betrayal for Men - Hali Roderick is starting a betrayal trauma support group for men who have been betrayed where they can gain tools and resources to recover from betrayal trauma in a healthy way while being surrounded by a supportive community.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and comradery.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey teaches this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
- Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcastwith Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning towards divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
👮 Do you find yourself policing your partner, feeling the need to repeatedly check their phone, their whereabouts, and their actions? First, this is NORMAL after betrayal, and second, this isn’t a place you want to stay long term. There ARE ways to let go of these habits in a way that will move you from feeling powerless to empowered. Amie and Alana break down the whys of hypervigilance as they encourage you to get curious about some of your behaviors after betrayal.
Tune in to learn:
- What is causing your hypervigilance?
- What are some examples of hypervigilance?
- How can you manage feelings of hypervigilance?
- What is the difference between hypervigilance and intuition?
- Why is hypervigilance so damaging long term?
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Alana’s Blog Post on Hypervigilance
Podcast Episode: How Can I Tell the Difference Between Trauma and Intuition?
Full Disclosure Information
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks.
- Help Her Heal for Men - Hali Roderick helps men learn more about empathy, conflict resolution, and healthy communication. Participants will receive weekly exercises and worksheets to help them gain the skills to begin healing a broken relationship.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and comradery.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
-
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey teaches this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
-
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning towards divorce.
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
Are triggers getting in the way of your ability to recognize your gut feelings? And what’s the difference between the two? After going through trauma, it can become confusing to distinguish between which feelings are legitimate alarm bells and what’s a false alarm. Amie and Alana share real life examples, relatable analogies, and helpful tips to help you get to the bottom of these feelings in this week’s episode.
Tune in to learn:
- How to identify if you have safety in your relationship
- How regulating your emotions helps you tune into gut feelings
- Why you might find it more difficult to regulate your emotions in the summer
- The first step to sorting out your emotions
- What it looks like to become an expert of your feelings
Take your healing to the next level with Amie's new group starting next month - Believing in You! Get tools and concepts to gain more self awareness and learn how to love yourself. Spots are filling quickly, so register today!
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks. Learn more.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors. Learn more.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves. Learn more.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and comradery. Learn more.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery. Learn more.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity. Learn more.
-
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey teaches this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage. Learn more.
-
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce. Learn more.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning towards divorce. Listen here.
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
There’s no such thing as bad support, right? Wrong! Amie and Alana welcome you to a chat about times you may be getting “support” that isn’t truly supporting your healing journey. Find out what helps and what is holding you back when it comes to getting the support you need in this week’s episode of the Choose to Be Podcast.
Tune in to learn:
What does healthy and unhealthy support look like?
What does it mean to have “friends of your marriage?”
How to manage friendships with unhealthy support?
What should you do if family members are an unhealthy support?
Take your healing to the next level with Amie's new group starting next month - Believing in You! Get tools and concepts to gain more self awareness and learn how to love yourself. Spots are filling quickly, so register today!
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Healing - Betrayal Trauma Support for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks. Learn more.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors. Learn more.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves. Learn more.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and comradery. Learn more.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery. Learn more.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity. Learn more.
-
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey teaches this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage. Learn more.
-
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce. Learn more.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning towards divorce. Listen here.
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
As a trailblazer and thought-leader in the field of gaslighting, Sarah Morales has redefined gaslighting to help reduce the stigmatization, fear, and powerlessness around the term. This week, Sarah joins Amie and Alana to share what gaslighting looks like, what it takes to repair a relationship with gaslighting, and whether or not chronic gaslighters are capable of healing.
Don’t miss this episode to learn:
- Why those in recovery continue to gaslight.
- What you might be getting wrong about gaslighting and narcissism.
- How to tune into your head, heart, and gut when being gaslit.
- One of Sarah’s favorite phrases she has her clients tell themselves.
Connect with Sarah Morales:
Website: https://www.sarahmoralescoaching.com
Sarah’s free video series: https://www.sarahmoralescoaching.com/free-gaslighting-video-series
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sarahmoralescoaching/
Email: sarah@sarahmoralescoaching.com
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks. Learn more.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors. Learn more.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves. Learn more.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and comradery. Learn more.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery. Learn more.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity. Learn more.
-
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey teaches this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage. Learn more.
-
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce. Learn more.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning towards divorce. Listen here.
- Believing In You Membership - Get weekly coaching, one on one coaching and opportunities in between weekly sessions, all to help you take your awareness and healing to the next level. Get more info HERE
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
Have you ever heard the saying, “Grief is a luxury for the brain that feels safe?” This is a quote from Dr. Jake Porter, and it might sound like an oxymoron, but it’s true! Amie and Alana share how grief is a luxury, and how you can’t get there unless you’re feeling safe within yourself, your body, and your emotions.
Tune into this episode to learn:
- A quick review of the stages of grief
- How a separation from your partner gives you the space to grieve
- The connection between relational safety and grief
- How relational safety brings relief
- How to get unstuck from feelings of sadness and anger
- …and more!
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks. Learn more.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors. Learn more.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves. Learn more.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and comradery. Learn more.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery. Learn more.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity. Learn more.
-
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey teaches this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage. Learn more.
-
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce. Learn more.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning towards divorce. Listen here.
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
Are you navigating parenting a child who struggles with compulsive behaviors? For those who have experienced betrayal trauma, this can bring up a lot of fears, triggers, and concern. Amie and Alana are joined this week by special guest, Marriage and Family Therapist, Jeremy Leavitt, to discuss the exploratory and compulsive behaviors your children may be experiencing, and how you can help. Plus, listen to the end for the one potentially awkward question Jeremy recommends all parents ask their teens.
In this episode you’ll learn more about:
- The four pillars of sobriety (Support, Successes, Accountability, Insight)
- How youth support groups differ from adult support groups
- Understanding shame and how to better respond
- How parents’ fears can sabotage a child’s healing
- How should a parent react to a child’s compulsive behaviors
- Why being in tune to your own emotions allows you to have more trust in your children
- Loving, honoring, and embracing sexuality
You can connect with Jeremy Leavitt, LMFT by emailing him at leavitttherapy@gmail.com
Is your relationship trying to heal from infidelity, sexual addiction, or other forms of betrayal? Whether you need couple support, individual help, or group work we can help you find the right fit and move you from stuck to freedom. Set up a free consult today! www.chooserecoveryservices.com
More from Choose Recovery Services
-
Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks. Learn more.
-
Believing In You Group Coaching for Women - Come join Amie Woolsey as she coaches you on learning how to TRUST yourself again, LOVE yourself perhaps for the first time, and BELIEVE that you can be happy again. Weekly coaching, 2 FREE 1:1 sessions with Amie, worksheets, recorded sessions, tools to practice each week and more. Come get your spot!
-
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors. Learn more.
-
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves. Learn more.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and comradery. Learn more.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery. Learn more.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity. Learn more.
-
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey teaches this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage. Learn more.
-
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce. Learn more.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning towards divorce. Listen here.
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
Join us for part four of the four-part series on therapeutic separations. In this episode, Amie, Alana, and Luke break down the pieces of what the separation can entail to help work towards reunification and reintegration back into the home and relationship. They discuss what things to watch for, markers to know you might be ready, and what to do if your partner isn't doing their part.
Is your relationship trying to heal from infidelity, sexual addiction, or other forms of betrayal? Whether you need couple support, individual help, or group work we can help you find the right fit and move you from stuck to freedom. Set up a free consult today! www.chooserecoveryservices.com
More from Choose Recovery Services
-
Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks. Learn more.
-
Believing In You Group Coaching for Women - Come join Amie Woolsey as she coaches you on learning how to TRUST yourself again, LOVE yourself perhaps for the first time, and BELIEVE that you can be happy again. Weekly coaching, 2 FREE 1:1 sessions with Amie, worksheets, recorded sessions, tools to practice each week and more. Come get your spot!
-
Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors. Learn more.
-
Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves. Learn more.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and comradery. Learn more.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery. Learn more.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity. Learn more.
-
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey teaches this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage. Learn more.
-
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce. Learn more.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning towards divorce. Listen here.
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
This is part three of a four-part series on therapeutic separations. In this episode, Amie and Alana break down the pieces of a therapeutic agreement for separation. This agreement outlines the terms and conditions agreed upon by the couple as they undergo the separation process. It serves as a framework to establish clear boundaries, expectations, and goals.
Listen to learn the 12 critical questions outlined in the agreement, including:
- What are the goals for the separation?
- What are the expectations for visiting each other’s living spaces?
- Who will be taking the children and when?
- When will you plan to check in with each other?
- What are the specific plans for contacting each other?
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks. Learn more.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors. Learn more.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves. Learn more.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and comradery. Learn more.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery. Learn more.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity. Learn more.
-
Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey teaches this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage. Learn more.
-
Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce. Learn more.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning towards divorce. Listen here.
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
This is part two of a four-part series on therapeutic separations. Last week Amie and Alana covered why you might need a separation and the feelings that come up while making this decision. This week, Luke Gordon joins to discuss how to prepare for a separation, and what to expect emotionally, mentally, and physically.
Tune in to learn:
- How a marriage separation could benefit your relationship.
- Situations where it’s important to spend time apart.
- Fears you may experience when considering a separation.
- The importance of individual work through a separation.
- How to approach talking to your kids about a separation.
More from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks. Learn more.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors. Learn more.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves. Learn more.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and comradery. Learn more.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery. Learn more.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity. Learn more.
- Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey teaches this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage. Learn more.
- Dating After Divorce Course - Join Amie for three 90-minute sessions to learn essential tips to diving into the dating scene after divorce. Learn more.
- Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce. Learn more.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning towards divorce. Listen here.
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
Considering a separation can feel daunting and intimidating. This episode is the first of a 4-part series on separation. In this episode, Amie and Alana walk you through the basics of what a separation actually is, the 4 types of separations you could consider, the benefits of spending some time apart, and what you need to think about when considering a separation.
Amie and Alana will encourage you to pay attention to your body, your needs, and your safety as you navigate this difficult decision, and they’ll share examples of what separation looked and felt like in their relationships. Listen to the full episode to learn more!
- Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks. Learn more.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors. Learn more.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves. Learn more.
- Choose 360 for Men - Support group for men who have reached a sense of wholeness in their recovery and are looking to maintain their recovery through awareness, accountability, and comradery. Learn more.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery. Learn more.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity. Learn more.
- Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey teaches this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage. Learn more.
- Dating After Divorce Course - Join Amie for three 90-minute sessions to learn essential tips to diving into the dating scene after divorce. Learn more.
- Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce. Learn more.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning towards divorce. Listen here.
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
Are you trying to heal you relationship after its been destroyed by lies, betrayal, infidelity, problematic sexual behaviors, or sexual addiction? Join us for a free Q&A and webinar the last Sunday of every month.
Register by going to ChooseRecoveryServices.com
Additional Resources from Choose Recovery Services
•Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks. Learn more.
•Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors. Learn more.
•Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves. Learn more.
•Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery. Learn more.
•Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity. Learn more.
Going through something traumatic can feel like having a rug ripped out from underneath you, leaving you feeling disoriented and confused. It’s natural to lose trust in others and in yourself as you work through processing what has happened to you.
In this episode, Alana will help you gain an understanding of how to find yourself again. Alana will share 8 essential steps to finding yourself after trauma, like:
- Acknowledging your experience with self-compassion
- Understanding and identifying useful coping mechanisms
- Establishing a new routine
- Rediscovering passions and interests
- And more!
Alana gives you great ideas to begin building your foundation of healing and encourages you to take baby steps to begin trying them one at a time.
Mentioned in this episode: Book of Boundaries by Melissa Urban
Additional Resources from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks. Learn more.
- Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from compulsive behavior, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors. Learn more.
- Choose 180 for Men - This support group helps men gain emotional intelligence so they can better manage unwanted behaviors. Participants will connect with other men, better understand their emotions, work through shame, and build a deep respect for themselves. Learn more.
- Road to Recovery - Free monthly webinar with Luke and Alana Gordon for couples navigating the relational aspects the come along the road to recovery. Learn more.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches this free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity. Learn more.
- Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Amie Woolsey teaches this free monthly coaching call for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage. Learn more.
- Dating After Divorce Course - Join Amie for three 90-minute sessions to learn essential tips to diving into the dating scene after divorce. Learn more.
- Empowered Divorce Q&A - Amie Woolsey offers a free monthly coaching call to answer questions for women navigating divorce. Learn more.
- The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey for those who are leaning towards divorce. Listen here.
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
Sign up here to get an email reminder every time a new episode drops!
Have you ever thought about betrayal trauma’s impact on your brain health? After watching her dad lose his life to Dementia last year, Hali Roderick began to gain an interest in the connection between the physical brain and emotional healing.
As Hali looked into ways to prevent her physical brain from cognitive decline, she recognized a lot of the signs of brain injury are similar to the symptoms of betrayal trauma.
Tune in to this episode with our guests, Hali and Jeff Roderick to learn:
- Symptoms of betrayal trauma that match those of head injury.
- Why ignoring brain health could halt your healing.
- Habits that improve brain health.
- How inflammation impacts cognitive health.
- Resources to help you learn more about your cognitive health.
Learn more at www.proactivebrainhealth.com
The Audio Visual Entrainment that we talked about can be found here:https://mindalive.com/products/david-delight-pro
Find Hali and Jeff on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@proactivebrainhealth/video/7231321359903722794
Schedule a complimentary session to learn more, go to: https://haliroderickcoaching.youcanbook.me/
Join Hali for a women's betrayal trauma retreat September 13-17th in Queen Creek, Arizona. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1s3HWCrkXn0dQ4OR-ZExLFEQ4EKZLCIqL56vN3GGeBpI/edit?usp=sharing
Groups, Classes, and Resources from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - Support group is for women who have recently gone through betrayal to help them in those beginning stages.
- Choose 90 | Gaining Sobriety - This course provides support, guidance, and resources to individuals who struggle with compulsive sexual behaviors.
- Choose 180 Male Support Group - This group helps men move through the pains of addiction while healing from shame.
- Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana for a free monthly couples webinar to navigate the relational aspects that come on the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches a free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- Should I Stay or Should I Go - Join this FREE group coaching call with Amie for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
- Dating After Divorce Course - Check out this course with Amie Woolsey that prepares you to start dating again after divorce.
You can also find Amie on The Empowered Divorce Podcast!
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTI, CCPS, CSAT Candidate, Betrayal Trauma Coach
- Choose Recovery Services
Sign up here to get an email reminder every time a new episode drops!
As the partner who betrayed works through their recovery, we often see that they start to increase their efforts to help their partner. They may help out more with the kids, take the trash out without being asked, or bring home dinner when their partner is having a hard day.
The betrayed partner may find themselves rejecting these efforts, which causes both partners to become frustrated, angry, and disconnected. The partner who betrayed starts wondering why these kind gestures aren’t working.
On this episode of Choose to Be, we will talk about what to do when helping doesn’t actually help, and we’ll share what you can do instead that will make a difference in your relationship.
Join us for the conversation on questions such as:
- What’s behind the trying?
- How can you use curiosity and communication to grow closer together?
- What is the role of emotion and logic in communication?
- What is the betrayed partner really looking for?
Groups, Classes, and Resources from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - Support group is for women who have recently gone through betrayal to help them in those beginning stages.
Choose 90 | Gaining Sobriety - This course provides support, guidance, and resources to individuals who struggle with compulsive sexual behaviors.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - This group helps men move through the pains of addiction while healing from shame.
Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana for a free monthly couples webinar to navigate the relational aspects that come on the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches a free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Join this FREE group coaching call with Amie for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - FREE, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags in your relationship.
You can also find Amie on The Empowered Divorce Podcast!
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTI, CCPS, CSAT Candidate, Betrayal Trauma Coach
- Choose Recovery Services
Sign up here to get an email reminder every time a new episode drops!
When you find out that your partner has been acting out in sexually compulsive ways, it can feel scary and concerning to then leave them alone. Perhaps most of the sexually compulsive behavior was done while you were away, so of course you would feel worried leaving them alone.
Join Amie and Alana today as they discuss what you can do when this situation is part of your journey.
Finding support along your healing from betrayal is key and here at Choose Recovery Services, we want to give you the highest quality care, tools and support. If you are considering separation, divorcing or divorced then we also have support, tools and care for you as well. The first 12 weeks are FREE when you register HERE
Groups, Classes, and Resources from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - Support group is for women who have recently gone through betrayal to help them in those beginning stages.
Choose 90 | Gaining Sobriety - This course provides support, guidance, and resources to individuals who struggle with compulsive sexual behaviors.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - This group helps men move through the pains of addiction while healing from shame.
Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana for a free monthly couples webinar to navigate the relational aspects that come on the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches a free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Join this FREE group coaching call with Amie for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - FREE, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags in your relationship.You can also find Amie on The Empowered Divorce Podcast!
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTI, CCPS, CSAT Candidate, Betrayal Trauma Coach
- Choose Recovery Services
Sign up here to get an email reminder every time a new episode drops!
These terms have been used to describe someone who is struggling with any addictive behavior and who becomes sober from that particular destructive addiction, and becomes addicted to another less destructive behavior. However, the root issue behind the addiction is yet to be resolved.
We are describing this a compulsive sexual behavior transfer. So many of our clients will see their partner become sober from the compulsive sexual acting out behaviors, but become compulsive around another behavior such as video games, food, exercise, etc.
What we are seeing is that, even though this is a healthier behavior, and part of what the one struggling with compulsive behavior is encouraged to do as a way to find healthier coping behaviors, they are still not getting to the root of the emotional exploration that leads to the compulsivity in the first place.
This can cause a lot of conflict int he betrayed partners body when there still feels as if things are not right, but k nows that her partner is not acting out sexually.
Today we hope to validate you if this is whats going on, to help educate those of you who perhaps might be in the compulsive sexual behavior transfer, and to help encourage you to all to continue to choose healing, choose recovery and choose YOU!
Groups, Classes, and Resources from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - Support group is for women who have recently gone through betrayal to help them in those beginning stages.
Choose 90 | Gaining Sobriety - This course provides support, guidance, and resources to individuals who struggle with compulsive sexual behaviors.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - This group helps men move through the pains of addiction while healing from shame.
Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana for a free monthly couples webinar to navigate the relational aspects that come on the road to recovery.
Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches a free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Join this FREE group coaching call with Amie for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - FREE, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags in your relationship.You can also find Amie on The Empowered Divorce Podcast!
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTI, CCPS, CSAT Candidate, Betrayal Trauma Coach
- Choose Recovery Services
Sign up here to get an email reminder every time a new episode drops!
Acceptance is a critical and difficult part of the healing process. Many people get stuck in acceptance, thinking that by accepting their reality it means they approve of their situation. Join Amie Woolsey this week as she shares the difference between acceptance and approval, and gives examples of what acceptance looks like.
Tune in to learn:
- How acceptance is like teaching someone to drive.
- The role a support system has on gaining acceptance.
- The difference between facts and interpretation of facts.
- How acceptance leads to empowerment.
- What full acceptance of yourself looks like
Groups, Classes, and Resources from Choose Recovery Services
- Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - Support group is for women who have recently gone through betrayal to help them in those beginning stages.
- Choose 90 | Gaining Sobriety - This course provides support, guidance, and resources to individuals who struggle with compulsive sexual behaviors.
- Choose 180 Male Support Group - This group helps men move through the pains of addiction while healing from shame.
- Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana for a free monthly couples webinar to navigate the relational aspects that come on the road to recovery.
- Choosing to Stay Webinar - Hali Roderick teaches a free monthly webinar for couples choosing to stay together after infidelity.
- Should I Stay or Should I Go - Join this FREE group coaching call with Amie for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
- Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - FREE, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags in your relationship.
You can also find Amie on The Empowered Divorce Podcast!
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTI, CCPS, CSAT Candidate, Betrayal Trauma Coach
- Choose Recovery Services
Sign up here to get an email reminder every time a new episode drops!
Have you lost your voice? Do you believe that what you think and feel matters? It may be surprising to really think about your answers to those questions. In this episode, Amie and Alana discuss the importance of honoring your voice, honoring yourself, and honoring your needs to reclaim your voice.
This episode covers topics like:
- How did your voice become minimized?
- Are you able to recognize your needs?
- What does self-acceptance look and feel like?
- What does honoring yourself look like?
- How does giving your emotions a voice help you honor yourself?
- What fears might be getting in your way?
Groups, Classes, and Resources from Choose Recovery Services
Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - Support group is for women who have recently gone through betrayal to help them in those beginning stages.
Choose Recovery for Couples- This group gives couples the tools and support you need to work through the pain and begin rebuild your relationship.
Choose 90 | Gaining Sobriety- This course provides support, guidance, and resources to individuals who struggle with compulsive sexual behaviors.
Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana for a free monthly couples webinar to navigate the relational aspects that come on the road to recovery.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Join this FREE group coaching call with Amie for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - FREE, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags in your relationship.
Choose 180 Male Support Group- This group helps men move through the pains of addiction while healing from shame.
You can also find Amie on The Empowered Divorce Podcast!
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTI, CCPS, CSAT Candidate, Betrayal Trauma Coach
- Choose Recovery Services
Sign up here to get an email reminder every time a new episode drops!
How can you start to trust yourself again after betrayal? Being betrayed by a partner is traumatizing physiologically, emotionally, and mentally. This can leave trauma on your body even long after the betrayal has occurred. When you’ve had this kind of blow in your life, it affects your sense of self, sense of safety, and self identity. This makes trusting yourself difficult.
This is a very natural response when you’ve experienced betrayal, but learning to trust yourself again is the first key to healing. Join Amie Woolsey in this episode as she shares:
- Whose responsibility it is to rebuild the trust
- Common thoughts and feelings you can experience after trust is broken
- The power of thought dumping
- Tools to begin to regain trust in yourself
- What it will look and feel like when you start trusting yourself again
Groups, Classes, and Resources from Choose Recovery Services:
- Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana for a free monthly couples webinar to navigate the relational aspects that come on the road to recovery.
- Should I Stay or Should I Go - Join this FREE group coaching call with Amie for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
- Healthy Dating Webinar - FREE webinar with Amie for single 18-25 year-olds interested in receiving tools and encouragement for future relationships.
- Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - FREE, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags in your relationship.
- Choose 180 Male Support Group - This group helps men move through the pains of addiction while healing from shame.
- Transforming Your Triggers- 6-week course taught by Hali Roderick to help women manage and overcome the challenges of trauma triggers.
- FREE BODY LOVE class that's ready when you are.
- You can also find Amie on The Empowered Divorce Podcast!
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTI, CCPS, CSAT Candidate, Betrayal Trauma Coach
- Choose Recovery Services
Sign up here to get an email reminder every time a new episode drops!
Today Amie and Alana talk about trust using the work of Brené Brown, and American professor, who created specific elements of trust by using the acronym BRAVING. Because it's BRAVE to trust, especially after betrayal.
When you are trying to watch your partner's feet move back up the ladder of trust, it can be confusing to know what you are even watching for! So they break down these tools she offers as elements of trust and make them more tangible and betrayal trauma relatable. These are NOT all the ways that trust is restored and yet this gives a nice place to start and easy to remember way that can help you begin leaning into trust.
The Acronym BRAVING
B- Boundaries
R- Reliability
A-Accountability
V-Vault/Vulnerability
I- Integrity
N- Non-judgment
G-Grace
Remember, when there is no honesty and safety in the relationship, there can't be trust. So please evaluate your own situation as to if this is ready to be practiced in a relational way at this time.
Join Amie next week as she will talk about rebuilding trust with YOURSELF FIRST.
Link to the original Brene Brown's Talk on BRAVING
Finding Yourself After Betrayal -Amie Woolsey and the ladder of trust in more depth
Making Amends Choose to Be Podcast Episode
Don't miss these new groups by Choose Recovery Services:
❤️🩹 Choose Recovery for Couples - A comprehensive support group for couples to get the support they need to work through the pain of infidelity and betrayal and begin rebuilding their relationship. Taught by Luke and Alana Gordon. Learn more.
👩 Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks. Learn more.
🧑 Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from addiction, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors. Learn more.
💕 YSA Healthy Dating & Empowerment Course - For young, single women who are navigating the dating scene, Amie Woolsey from Choose Recovery Services educates and empowers women with the knowledge to understand boundaries, self-care, red flags, 7 levels of intimacy, and so much more! Learn more.
💪 Believing in You - Program to help you work with your brain rather than against it with Amie Woolsey. You’ll learn tools and concepts to gain a better awareness of your thoughts and emotions and how to gently push back on automatic thoughts. Learn more.
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - FREE, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags in your relationship.
Connect with us on social media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
Sign up here to get an email reminder every time a new episode drops!
.What would you guess is the #1 thing people want help with when they go to see a therapist or a coach? Here’s a hint…whether you’re dealing with betrayal, trauma, or just simple disruptions in a relationship growing apart, all these roads lead to a need for better communication.
We are hard-wired for connection, and a core part of connection is communication. Join Alana on this episode for the first step to better communication in your relationship – learning the difference between communicating in a way that is passive, aggressive, passive aggressive, and assertive.
A few topics covered on this episode include:
- Why are you feeling passive aggressive with your partner after betrayal?
- What does it look like to communicate passive aggressively?
- The swings between communication styles after betrayal.
- How to communicate using “I feel” statements.
- How learning new information can lead to behavior changes.
Don't miss these new groups by Choose Recovery Services:
❤️🩹 Choose Recovery for Couples - A comprehensive support group for couples to get the support they need to work through the pain of infidelity and betrayal and begin rebuilding their relationship. Taught by Luke and Alana Gordon. Learn more.
👩 Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks. Learn more.
🧑 Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from addiction, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors. Learn more.
💕 YSA Healthy Dating & Empowerment Course - For young, single women who are navigating the dating scene, Amie Woolsey from Choose Recovery Services educates and empowers women with the knowledge to understand boundaries, self-care, red flags, 7 levels of intimacy, and so much more! Learn more.
💪 Believing in You - Program to help you work with your brain rather than against it with Amie Woolsey. You’ll learn tools and concepts to gain a better awareness of your thoughts and emotions and how to gently push back on automatic thoughts. Learn more.
Connect with us on social media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
Sign up here to get an email reminder every time a new episode drops!
🎙️ We’re closing out the last episode of a 3-part series on the topic of adult children of sex addicts featuring Dr. Kenneth M. Adams Ph.D., CSAT-S, and author of the new book, A Light in the Dark: The Hidden Legacy of Adult Children of Sex Addicts.
This week, we respond to listener questions such as:
- “Do I need to hide my pain from my kids?”
- “When is it too late to repair your relationship with your children?”
- “How can I work through the guilt and shame that come from repairing damaged relationships?”
Amie and Alana are excited about the questions this book has brought up for you, and they encourage you to keep asking questions as you heal. Your path to healing will be filled with pain and fear, but as you do this difficult work, there is healing, beauty, strength, and post-traumatic growth to be found along the way.
Amie and Alana referenced Vicki Tidwell Palmer’s Bill of Rights in this episode. You can find the full list here.
Don’t miss these new groups offered by Choose Recovery Services:
❤️🩹 Choose Recovery for Couples - A comprehensive support group for couples to get the support they need to work through the pain of infidelity and betrayal and begin rebuilding their relationship. Taught by Luke and Alana Gordon. Learn more.
👩 Choose Betrayal Trauma Healing for Women - This weekly support group is for women who have recently experienced betrayal and are needing help to cope with the symptoms of trauma such as depression, hypervigilance, anxiety, and lack of trust. Ask questions from our team of coaches at Choose Recovery Services who have been there with this accessible group that is free for the first 12 weeks. Learn more.
🧑 Choose 90 for Men - Support group for men who are ready to take the first step towards recovery from addiction, infidelity and/or betrayal. Participants will gain tools and an understanding to better manage emotions and assess behaviors. Learn more.
💕 YSA Healthy Dating & Empowerment Course - For young, single women who are navigating the dating scene, Amie Woolsey from Choose Recovery Services educates and empowers women with the knowledge to understand boundaries, self-care, red flags, 7 levels of intimacy, and so much more! Learn more.
💪 Believing in You - Program to helps you work with your brain rather than against it with Amie Woolsey. You’ll learn tools and concepts to gain a better awareness of your thoughts and emotions and how to gently push back on automatic thoughts. Learn more.
Connect with us on social media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
Sign up here to get an email reminder every time a new episode drops!
Join the conversation today as Amie and Alana interview Dr. Kenneth M Adams, Ph.D., CSAT-S and author of the new book, Alight in the dark, The hidden legacy of adult children of sex addicts co authored with Mary E Meyer, Ph.D., LMFT, and Culle L Vande Garde, LCSW where they detail the unique issues experienced by adult children who grew up with a sexually addicted parent.
We are thrilled to share this powerful conversation with you in hopes that as a child of a sexually addicted parent, you will find the pieces that you have been carrying and find hope and healing. We also hope that for those who are the addicted parent or betrayed parent, this book will help you to understand your children's experiences so you can be a source of healing for them as well.
If this book brings up any questions or concerns in your personal journey please reach out to Alana, Amie or Luke.
NEW Support Groups available starting in April. For more information or to register clickHERE
Ready to take your healing to the next level?
Choose Recovery for couples is for those who are ready to lean into the relationship and do that next level work. This comprehensive support group is designed to provide you and your partner with the tools and support you need to work through the pain and begin rebuild your relationship. Alana and Luke tag team teaching and support to guide you through the healing process and help you communicate effectively, regain trust, and begin to move forward.
Click HERE for more information and to see if you are ready.
Believing In You Coaching Program starts April 5th! This group is for women who are ready to take their individual healing up a notch. Learning to trust yourself, love yourself and believe that you can truly create the life you want. We do that by digging into more awareness and leaning into more acceptance so that you can experience the life in the way you choose.
To find out more information on that or get your spot click HERE
Follow on Instagram to stay caught up on whats happening!
@Chooserecoveryservices
@therapywithalana
@amiewoolsey
Join Amie and Alana today as the first part of a three part series around adult children of sex addicts. Todays episode preambles the much anticipated interview with Dr. Kenneth M Adams Ph.D., CSAT-S and author of the new book, A light in the dark, The hidden legacy of adult children of sex addicts co authored with Mary E. Meyer, Ph.D., LMFT, and Culle L. Vande Garde, LCSW where they detail the unique issues experienced by adult children who grew up with a sexually addicted parent.
This book offers a path to unburden their shameful legacy and embrace sexuality and intimacy without the intrusion or constraints from the past.
Today Amie and Alana share thoughts to help prepare you for next weeks episode with Dr Adams and help those of you who are ready to gain more awareness and curiosity around this piece of your healing journey both for the addict, and the betrayed, and your children.
Mentioned in todays episode:
A list in the dark, The hidden legacy of adult children of sex addicts
NEW FREE WOMENS SUPPORT GROUPS with Choose Recovery Services starting in April. These are for those who are navigating their betrayal journey and staying in the marriage and those who are leaving the marriage or divorced.
For more information around these groups and to see if they are a right fit for you at this time Click HERE
Believing In YOU Membershipor those who are ready to take their healing to the next level and practice tools that will help you move forward after betrayal, abuse and or around divorce. This new membership now comes with 2 free 2:2 sessions with Amie every 12 weeks and at least 20 hours of coaching every 12 week cycle. You will now have access to Marco Polo for coaching around stuck points in between sessions, Facebook support group, worksheets, recorded sessions and more. To see if you are ready for this group feel free to book a consultation with Amie or email Vanessa at info@chooserecoveryservices.com
Interested in the Mens support groups and addiction recovery groups? Get on the interest list and find out more information by emailing info@chooserecoveryservices.com
The Body Love Course- to help you lean into the awareness of you body and become more at ease in it.
The Empowered Divorce Podcast- for those who are leaning towards divorce
Should I Stay Or Should I Go- for those who feel stuck in making the decision. This groups coaching session can help you gain clarity around your thoughts and help you make the decision that is most wise for you.
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
Sign up here to get an email reminder every time a new episode of Choose to Be drops!
Do you feel fear, shame, insecurity, or pressure when you think about your sexuality? Join Amie and Alana as they help you consider if you’re ready to lean back into your sexuality after betrayal, and why it’s okay to embrace your sexuality.
Tune into the episode to think about:
- Embedded beliefs you may have around sexuality
- Four elements that build intimacy
- Small ways to become more aware of your body
- How to separate sex from pleasure
- The links between shame and sexuality
Resources mentioned in todays episode
Healthy Sexual Dimensions:
Nurturing: The capacity to receive care from others and provide care for self
Sensuality: Mindfulness of physical senses that creates emotions, intellectual, spiritual and physical presence
Self Image: A positive self-perception that includes embracing your sexual self
Self Definition: A clear knowledge of yourself, both positive and negative, and the ability to express boundaries as well as needs
Comfort: The capacity to be at ease about sexual matters with oneself and with others
Knowledge: A knowledge base about sex in general and about one's own unique sexual patterns
Relationship: A capacity to have intimacy and friendship with both same and opposite gender
Partnership: The ability to maintain an interdependent, equal relationship that is intimate and erotic
The Body Love Course- to help you lean into the awareness of you body and become more at ease in it.
The Empowered Divorce Podcast- for those who are leaning towards divorce
Should I Stay Or Should I Go- for those who feel stuck in making the decision. This groups coaching session can help you gain clarity around your thoughts and help you make the decision that is most wise for you.
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
Sign up here to get an email reminder every time a new episode of Choose to Be drops!
Valentine’s Day is meant to be a day for celebrating romance, but for those who have experienced betrayal, this day can serve as a reminder of what you’ve lost. We want to hold space today for the triggers, the pain, and the hard you may be feeling around this holiday.
Whether you’re in a relationship, divorced, or single, you may find yourself grieving the expectations that were never realized in your romantic relationships. But perhaps you can take a minute this week to think about how you might be able to create a new tradition of loving you.
On this episode, Amie and Alana share:
- Examples of what being authentic on Valentine’s Day has looked like for them
- Ideas to help you set up realistic expectations
- Unexpected benefits that come from loving yourself
You get to decide on this day that celebrates love IF you want to celebrate love, and you get to decide how that looks.
Groups, Classes, and Resources from Choose Recovery Services:
- Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana for a free monthly couples webinar to navigate the relational aspects that come on the road to recovery.
- Should I Stay or Should I Go - Join this FREE group coaching call with Amie for those stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
- Healthy Dating Webinar- FREE webinar with Amie for single 18-25 year-olds interested in receiving tools and encouragement for future relationships.
- Am I In An Abusive Relationship?- FREE, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags in your relationship.
- Choose 180 Male Support Group - This group helps men move through the pains of addiction while healing from shame.
- Leaning In: Betrayal Trauma Group - Those ready to lean back into their relationship will gain support to repair their relationship in this group with Alana.
- Transforming Your Triggers- 6-week course taught by Hali Roderick to help women manage and overcome the challenges of trauma triggers.
- FREE BODY LOVE class that's ready when you are.
- You can also find Amie onThe Empowered Divorce Podcast!
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
- Sign up here to get an email reminder every time a new episode drops!
Have you seen yourself swing from a submissive role to a strong, independent perspective as you've begun the work of healing from betrayal trauma? Maybe you've found yourself feeling stuck and a little confused as you've tried to find the right balance of independence and interdependence?
Think through some of these questions with Amie and Alana on this week's episode:
- Do you have to give up independence in order to be relational?
- What is the difference between submission, dependence, and interdependence?
- How can you be independent and stay connected to your partner?
- What's easier - independence or interdependence?
- Why does being relational feel dangerous after betrayal trauma?
Get the answers to all of these questions and more this week on the Choose to Be Podcast!
Groups, Classes, and Resources from Choose Recovery Services:
- Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon for a free monthly couples webinar to navigate the relational aspects that come while on the road to recovery.
- Should I Stay or Should I Go - Come join this FREE group coaching call with Amie for those who are feeling stuck trying to decide whether to stay in their marriage.
- Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - This FREE, self-paced workshop will help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
- Choose 180 Male Support Group - Luke Gordon helps men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame in this weekly group.
- Leaning In: Betrayal Trauma Group - Those ready to lean back into their relationship after betrayal will gain the necessary tools, knowledge, and support to repair their relationship in this ongoing group led by Alana Gordon.
- Transforming Your Triggers- 6-week course taught by Hali Roderick to help women manage and overcome the challenges of trauma triggers.
- Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - Sign up now to reserve your spot for the next session of Amie's group coaching program that will help you gain awareness and heal in new ways - click the link to find out more.
- This FREE BODY LOVE class is ready when you are. Catch the recording HERE!
- You can also find Amie on The Empowered Divorce Podcast!
Connect with us on Social Media:
- Amie Woolsey - Life Coach CPC, ICF, ELI-MP, CLDS, APSATS Trainee
- Alana Gordon - MFTIntern, CCPS-C
- Choose Recovery Services
- Sign up here to get an email reminder every time a new episode drops!
Join us this week as we tackle the topic of letting the old relationship die after infidelity, betrayal, cheating, or compulsive acting out. We have with us Luke Gordon, men's mental health coach. Together we dive into why its recommended to let the old relationship die, what the looks like in real life, and how to move forward as a couple.
New Courses:
Transforming Your Triggers - A 6 week course taught by Hali Roderick about dealing with triggers from Betrayal Trauma
Next session starts March 13th, Mondays at 10am PT
Choosing to Stay | Choose Recovery Services - Are you choosing to stay, but still find yourself struggling to find your individual worth and identity? 12 weeks of coaching in a small group setting (3-4 women or 3-4 men) where you will have the opportunity to receive individual support as well as connect with a few other women (or men) who are going through similar experiences. Starts March 13th
Ongoing Groups and Classes:
Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Director of The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program -Led by Amie Woolsey
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
*Follow* Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.**
Do you feel yourself leaning towards divorce? Head over to The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey to get support.
Choose Recovery Services
It's a great question. Why are you doing the work right now and being aware of that why, will help you more than you perhaps realize. Today we discuss the fears, the concerns and the rewards of continuing on in the journey of healing for both the betrayed and the betrayer.
Ongoing Courses:
Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Transforming Your Triggers- Led by coach Hallie Roderick
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Do you feel yourself leaning towards divorce? Head over to The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey to get support.
We are thrilled to have joining us in todays conversation Geoff Steurer, MS, LMFT
He is one of the leaders in the field of addiction and betrayal, host of the podcast, From Crisis To Connection, Geoff joins our conversation today to discuss an important topic, sexual consent. Most importantly, sexual consent in marriage.
This is a powerful episode for both the betrayed and the betrayer to understand, and gain more awareness around. If you feel there is further work to do around this topic personally, please reach out to one of our trained coaches and seek help. You have a right to a healthy sexual experience.
To learn more about Geoff check out his website HERE
Ongoing Courses:
Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Transforming Your Triggers- Led by coach Hallie Roderick
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Do you feel yourself leaning towards divorce? Head over to The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey to get support.
Both partners can often feel unsure, skeptical and question the effort that it takes to do the healing work in this journey. It can come right down to the fear of separation and divorce. What if you do all this work and your partner still chooses to leave or not do their part? So why do it?
Join Amie and Alana today and they discuss the reasons why doing our own work is so important, no matter what the outcome is.
Ongoing Courses:
Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Transforming Your Triggers- Led by coach Hallie Roderick
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Do you feel yourself leaning towards divorce? Head over to The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey to get support.
Amie and Alana have a very informative and powerful conversation with Jared Rockwell who is not only a polygraph examiner but a LCSW with over 18 years experience. He is nationally recognized leader in his field and offers his expert thoughts today around how a polygraph works, why they are so important to rebuilding trust in a relationship and what they are NOT.
We debunk some common myths around the polygraph and it's purpose as well as offer some guidelines around what questions to ask and not ask.
Ongoing Courses:
Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Do you feel yourself leaning towards divorce? Head over to The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey to get support.
In todays episode Alana and Amie have a conversation about what it looks like to thrive and step out of victim mentality.
When you have been a victim of someone else's choices that created chaos and pain in your life. Sometimes undesirable pain, it's understandable how it feels powerless and overwhelmingly paralyzing. Sometimes the term victim takes on a negative connotation, and so it's a place we can often judge ourselves in.
There are so many subtle ways that we, often subconsciously, keep ourselves in victim mentality and yet are trying so hard to move forward and can't figure out why it's so difficult. Stepping in to your power and seeing what you do have to move forward, one step at a time, will help you not just survive, but thrive!
Join us today, leaving your own self judgment aside, and with curiosity see what your next move is to step into THRIVING!
Karpman Drama Triangle was referenced today
Ongoing Courses:
Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Do you feel yourself leaning towards divorce? Head over to The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey to get support.
Choose Recovery Services
When you have experienced betrayal, the holidays can trigger a lot of heartache rather than joy and sadness rather than happy. For those of you who are right in the middle of hard we want you to know we are thinking of you and praying for you. We know you do hard things.
Part of the healing journey is reclaiming, rewriting, rediscovering, YOUR holiday and deciding what that will look like, even in the middle of hard.
Today we share some thoughts with you about how to do that and offer a few ideas to begin with. Most importantly, we hope you choose healing, choose recovery and choose YOU during the holiday season.
Ongoing Courses:
Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Do you feel yourself leaning towards divorce? Head over to The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey to get support.
You are not going to want to miss todays conversation!! Ok, you really don’t want to miss any of our conversations, but today it a special one as we have joining us the amazing Tony Overbay.
We are talking about narcissism today with Tony and how to grasp the bigger picture in healing and recovery. Learning how to build a higher emotional IQ is often left out in most addiction recovery programs and this is a key piece to healing, recovery and just being a more functional human.
If you want to learn more about the tools that Tony talks about today such as the 4 pillars, his marriage course, or Facebook
support group check hi out HERE
His podcasts are The Virtual Couch and Waking Up To Narcissism
Ongoing Courses:
Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Do you feel yourself leaning towards divorce? Head over to The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey to get support.
The road to recovery can be a long and difficult road. When you don't know where you are headed and how to get there, it can feel even more daunting. Join Alana, Amie, and their guest, Luke Gordon, for a discussion around healing and what the road to recovery after infidelity, cheating, or sexual addiction can look like.
To have a visual of the recovery map, download it here.
To schedule a session with any of our therapists or coaches, go to Chooserecoveryservices.com or email us at info@chooserecoveryservices.com
Ongoing Courses:
Road to Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Do you feel yourself leaning towards divorce? Head over to The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey to get support.
It can feel so frustrating to not see change in your partner and in yourself and how will you know if your partner is really changing?
Alana and Amie answer another listeners question about this concept today and how to recognize change. This can be tricky to recognize they give you some ideas to consider and get curious about to help you determine for yourself if you are seeing the kind of change that you want.
The episode referenced in todays podcast is called Active Recovery in Betrayal Trauma and you can find the episode here: https://spotifyanchor-web.app.link/e/t3mQwDermvb
Ongoing Courses:
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Road To Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Do you feel yourself leaning towards divorce? Head over to The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey to get support.
Sometimes the holidays can be triggering and it's hard to feel grateful for anything. join Amie in todays episode where she offers some thoughts around how to navigate this holiday while you are also navigating big emotions. Because the truth is, you don't always have to feel grateful AND you can hold space for all emotions.
Ongoing Courses:
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Road To Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Do you feel yourself leaning towards divorce? Head over to The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey to get support.
In today's episode Amie and Alana talk about needs vs wants in a relationship as they answer a listers question.
This episode is geared specifically towards the betrayed in the relationship.
Ongoing Courses:
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Road To Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Do you feel yourself leaning towards divorce? Head over to The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey to get support.
When you start navigating the healing journey, you learn all kinds of tools and concepts, and you start applying them in hopes that change happens, in hopes that healing happens. But what if you are using ALL the tools and you are still feeling pain? What if you are trying to do all the things professionals say. to do but you are still feeling hurt?
Today Amie and Alana discuss the in's and out's of healing and how to view pain in a different way. Most of all, to know that you are not doing it wrong, and not going backwards.
Ongoing Courses:
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Road To Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Do you feel yourself leaning towards divorce? Head over to The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey to get support.
In todays Episode we welcome one of our amazing coaches Hali Roderick who is addressing the aspect of recovery when there has been an affair in the marriage, but no pornography. Many women are navigating this aspect of betrayal and often find it hard to feel supported and not sure how to heal from this kind of betrayal. Join us today and Hali shares key point to help you navigate your journey to find hope and healing.
Want to work with Hali? Check out chooserecoveryservices.com
Ongoing Courses:
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Road To Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Do you feel yourself leaning towards divorce? Head over to The Empowered Divorce Podcast with Amie Woolsey to get support.
Today Amie has an exciting announcement for an additional resource for those of you who are needing help navigating divorce after betrayal trauma. So tune in and listen to what she has been up to!
She also offers powerful thoughts around accessing your own empowerment and what that looks like, and how supporting each other as women is something she wants more of. No matter where you are at in your journey this is a powerful episode.
Feel free to share with someone you know!
Ongoing Courses:
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Road To Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Join Amie who is with therapist Kimberly Day as Kim announces the launch of her new website SAFE SPACE for those who are experiencing destructive elements in their relationships. It can be overwhelming to start learning about what's actually been going on in your relationship and when it's been destructive and down right abusive there can also be a lot of shame, which can keep many form getting help and talking about it.
Kim Day has created a SAFE SPACE for women to come and explore the different dynamics they are experiencing in the relationship. Worksheets, videos, community, podcast, free office and opportunities to get regular help are all available and so much more!
Even if you don't think you are experiencing this in your relationship this is a great episode to share because someone you know is nad most liely feels alone and doesn't know where to go to receive accurate information safely.
Check out onesafespace.com today and remember OCTOBER 24th is the official lunch day
Ongoing Courses:
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Road To Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Did you miss the FREE BODY LOVE class? no worries you can get the recording HERE
Upcoming Events:
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Last week Amie and Alana talked about empathy and different aspects of it with yourself as well as how to manage being empathic. Today they discuss how men in recovery can gain empathy and what that looks like, and what it doesn't look like.
Men, this is a great episode to listen to and get curious about for yourself and where you might be in your journey to recovery as gaining healthy empathy is critical to not only recovery but a healthy relationship.
Ongoing Courses:
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Road To Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Upcoming Events:
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
**Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
This topic came up in a group when someone asked us, “What if I have too much empathy – what if my empathy is coming back to bite me on the butt?”
Empathy is so complex when we're talking to women in betrayal trauma. And even within this specific container, there are so many nuances: having too much empathy, having too little empathy, how betrayal trauma affects your capacity for empathy with your children.
As we hone in on one area for the sake of starting somewhere, we encourage you to discern for yourself how you’re doing in these different areas. Ultimately, we hope to guide you towards embracing empathy in a way that’s healthy for you.
Ongoing Courses:
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Road To Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Upcoming Events:
Should I Stay or Should I Go - Held on the FIRST THURSDAY of every month. Come join this FREE group coaching with Amie for those who are feeling stuck in making a decision around their marriage. Come and get coached in a safe space to help you shift through not so helpful thoughts that are keeping you stuck
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
Whether you're in a romantic relationship or not, learning to create psychological safety for yourself after trauma is a huge principle of healing.
When we talk about betrayal and all the loss that comes with betrayal trauma, we include the loss of your central nervous system to PTSD, the loss of trust, the loss of your self esteem, the loss of emotional regulation, and the loss of safety.
Many of us don’t even know that we’re in charge of our own safety, and since we didn’t have it in place before the betrayal happened, our next best option is to put it in place now.
How to start creating psychological safety In the recovery world, it’s often asserted that the partner who’s caused the betrayal needs to create safety. And that’s true… to an extent. But the second we rely on an external source to be the answer, we give away our power. The truth is, you don’t have to wait on your partner to take action to feel safe. You already have the power to start creating the safety you need.
You’ll Learn: * How to choose new thoughts that rewire your brain for psychological safety * The importance of a community of support in your healing process * Why noticing yourself and your own needs is an essential step toward safety
Mentioned in the show: Facing Heartbreak: Steps to Recovery for Partners of Sex Addicts by Stefanie Carnes, PhD
Ongoing Courses:
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Road To Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Upcoming Events:
Body Love Workshop- Monday October 3rd @ 6:00pm PT
Join this FREE upcoming workshop where Amie walks you through some basic steps to lean to love your body again after betrayal.
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
If you’re new to the work of Tony Overbay, we’re so glad to be the ones to introduce you.
Tony is, among many things, a licensed marriage and family therapist and host of The Virtual Couch podcast. Today’s episode is a real treat, because it’s an interview with Luke and Alana on The Virtual Couch for a betrayal trauma podcast.
In conversation with Tony, Luke and Alana share vulnerable insights from behind-the-scenes in their marriage – including their history with betrayal trauma and their subsequent healing journey.
It was (and is) a long journey to navigate betrayal trauma and embark on a healing journey. Through PTSD, separation, no-contact periods, recommitting to the relationship, and raising five kids, Luke and Alana’s story is full of moments you can relate to no matter where you might be in your recovery journey.
You’ll Learn: * Why “staggered disclosure” is such a common theme in partner betrayal * The difference between disclosures that are healing and disclosures that are harmful * The cost of not having a mental health professional in the early days of their healing * How to understand trauma triggers with the analogy of the box
Ongoing Courses:
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free, self-paced workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Road To Recovery - Join Luke and Alana Gordon, Founders of Choose Recovery Services and Program Directors for the Men of Moroni and The Worth Group for a free monthly couples webinar. Navigating the relational aspects on the road to recovery can be complex and confusing.
Choose 180 Male Support Group - Led by Luke Gordon
In 180 we help men move through the pains of addiction, relationship healing, managing emotions, and moving past shame. You’ll learn how to better connect with other men, understand your own emotional experience, and build a deep self respect.
Upcoming Events:
Body Love Workshop- Monday October 3rd @ 6:00pm PT
Join this FREE upcoming workshop where Amie walks you through some basic steps to lean to love your body again after betrayal.
Believing In You- Group Coaching Program - GET YOUR SPOT FOR NEXT ROUND IN JANUARY!!
Take your healing to the NEXT LEVEL in Amie's group coaching program where you will gain more awareness that will help you heal in ways you didn't even know you needed. For more information on what this class entails click the link to find out more.
Follow Amie and Alana on social media for daily content and messages of healing and recovery.
When you experience trauma from betrayal, abuse and/or divorce, the first step is self care- caring for the self- your own wellbeing. Its more of our natural tendency to go the opposite- to take care of, to control, fix and look for al the things outside of us that we think are creating the inside chaos.
We often justify, rationalize, and minimize our need for wellbeing, for time, 10 minutes of time to just be silent, still, center, grounded, IN and with the self.
When we are in overdrive, we are now not living in the present, we are not in the moment we are not really living.
Today Amie shares what self care is NOT. Debunking myths about self care and offering you new ideas to consider.
Some episode Highlights:
-Self care is NOT selfish
-Self Care is NOT for those who are weak
-Self care is NOT a one and done
-The term self care can be changed!
-Emotional first aid kit and what that looks like for you
If you are struggling with step one in your healing journey you are not alone. thats why Amie creates a foundational healing group for these basic healing principles that often get overlooked or ignored. Dive deep into your foundational healing as the next group starts in September. contact chooserecoveryservices@gmail.com for more information.
From the episode:
Andy Puddicombe TED Talk
Ongoing Courses:
Am I In An Abusive Relationship? - Free self paces workshop to help you identify key red flags that might be showing up in your relationship.
Upcoming Events:
Body Love Workshop- Join this FREE upcoming workshop where Amie walks you through some basic steps to lean to love your body again after betrayal. to get on the interest list for that click the link!
Divorce Retreat October
Prepare to Thrive- early marriage course September
If you think this is just for you single ladies, think again! You will all love this episode. but, yes all you single ladies this is also to give you a little preview of what you will be getting at our next DIVORCE RETREAT in October!
Loni Harmon is amazing and so fun and will be one of our guest speakers at the retreat. Did I mention you don't want to miss this?!
We’ve got an awesome bonus episode for you today, because we’re talking to THE dating expert, Loni Harmon. Loni is a licensed clinical social worker with over 10 years of experience helping singles create secure, lasting relationships. Loni is also a guest speaker for our upcoming divorce retreat in October.
Clearly we were meant to cross paths, because we share passions about very similar things. We love helping women and men who are trying to navigate dating and really date healthy. And when you’re setting your priorities in a healthy relationship, one of the first things you want to consider is what we’re discussing today: healthy attachment.
What’s the big deal about attachment? Attachment theory came about in the 1950s and essentially theorizes that early experiences with our primary caregivers set the tone for how we attach in other major relationships throughout our lives. And depending on how that caregiver showed up, that’s how we learned how to interact with the world.
But it’s important to note: you are not your attachment style, and it’s not set in stone. So you can absolutely go about healing your attachment style and cultivate healthy attachments in dating.
Attachment style summary We cover three different attachment styles in this conversation, which include:
- Secure - Feels that most of the time, people show up and the world is a safe place.
- Anxious - Needs deep connection to avoid a sense of loss or abandonment.
- Avoidant - Becomes so independent and strong that they have no needs at all.
You’ll Learn: * How your attachment style affects the way you show up in relationships and dating * Ways to accept and own your attachment style so you can show up as yourself and connect authentically with others * Triggers for your attachment style and how to practice deep self-care * How to honor your attachment style in the midst of healing from betrayal or addiction trauma
***In this episode you will get a basic idea of what attachment styles look like, and how you might identify with the different styles. If you want to learn more about his we recommend the book Attached, where you can also take the assessment to find out your style.
****If you are divorced, it's time to treat yourself- click here for more information on the retreat coming up in October.
*If you are looking for resources for your young single adult , or know one who could use tools and concepts for healthy dating and self empowerment, (who doesn't?!) then share this link with a YSA you know. Next course starts September 11th!
*Check out Loni Harmon on Instagram
Don't miss out! Follow Amie & Alana on Social Media
In this continuation of our discussion on trauma bonding from last week, we’re bringing a second topic into the mix: over-functioning.
Over-functioning in relationships is a pattern where one person tends to take on all the thoughts, feelings, and responsibilities for both people in the relationship. It’s a way of establishing a sense of control – a common result in cases of trauma bonding where the balance of control is disproportionate.
A lot of times we miss the signs of over-functioning, particularly within relationships in recovery, because we don’t really see that it’s not healthy. It can be tricky to identify if you’re a natural caregiver. We think that’s how we should be functioning, or we may use it as a way to manage (ie: avoid) our own feelings.
So how do you move forward once you recognize patterns of over-functioning in yourself?
You’ll Learn: * More tangible examples of how trauma bonding could look in your relationship * How trauma bonding can lead to over-functioning in relationships, and what over-functioning actually is * Ways to identify and understand trauma response patterns and how they affect relationships in recovery * How to understand your past choices and consider ways to choose differently as you heal
We’re going to tackle a hard topic for our 100th episode today: trauma bonding. Many women don’t realize they’re either in trauma bonds themselves or they know someone who is. It’s a lot more prevalent than most of us expect. Let’s get some clarity around the term ‘trauma bonding’ and what it means, so we can better understand our relationships and experiences.
What is a trauma bond?
To quote Jourdan Travers, LCSW, “Trauma bonds are the attachments we have with our abusers. It's when we have fond feelings or miss individuals who have abused us because we've developed a connection to them. One minute things are good, and then the next, they're not.”
It's possible to become trauma bonded to a parent or any other person in your life. But our focus is on trauma bonding in romantic relationships.
There are so many nuances and complications around this topic. But we want this episode to serve as a starting point for you to get curious about your own experiences, and decide if and how you want to create different experiences moving forward.
You’ll Learn: * Why trauma bonds happen, why they’re hard to break, and how to start noticing them * Tools to help you gain clarity around trauma bonding experiences in your life * Techniques for breaking unhealthy patterns and beginning your healing from a trauma bond
So many of us, mostly women, have a really hard time with loving their bodies. The world tends to work against us as well- even if well intended, many messages are offering this idea that our bodies are not ok and they need to be different. Many feel they have the wrong body or something is wrong with their body. We are constantly judging our bodies against others’ and now days, against social media.
Today Amie shares 7 tools to help you lean into loving your body again, or perhaps for the first time!
~Getting To The Root
~Tapping Into Intuition- Trusting Your Gut
~Letting It Flow- Emotions
~Personal Empowerment- Ignite the Fire Within
~Expand The Heart- Choosing Love
~Having A Voice- Know Your Truth
~Connection- Access Your Higher Self
Connecting with your body is such beautiful work and I invite each of you to lean into this work, intentionally. To help you further your healing in this area, I will be hosting a live workshop for those who really want to dive deeper into this for themselves. Join the interest list by clicking the link below.
https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/body-love-class/
FREE YSA Webinar Registration- August 30th!!
When you have your next out-of-body experience of watching yourself scream at your kids, instead of waiting until they’re asleep to cry or sneak in their bedroom to hug them and kiss them and feel so much guilt…
What if you gave yourself permission for mistakes and do-overs as a parent?
What if we could make a mess and have the privilege of cleaning up our mess?
Sometimes we show up in a way that we wish we could do over. It’s inevitable - we’re not perfect. Particularly as you progress through the stages of healing after infidelity, it can feel like every mistake is the end of the world.
But there are ways to have healthy do-overs with your children and even your partner - when you make the conscious decision to learn to show up differently. We’re joined in conversation today by Luke Gordon, whose story of recovery has been so powerful, and who has done the work to show up as a strong parent willing to heal the parent-child relationship.
You’ll Learn: * How to build your self-awareness to allow for healthier relationships with your kids * Ways to show yourself compassion through the regret and remorse of the healing journey * What it looks like to clean up your own mess and start showing up differently * How to let your partner clean up their own mess instead of taking it on yourself
The Power of Processing and How It Can Help You Move Through Betrayal Trauma
How do you know if you’re doing the work it takes to heal? One big aspect of doing the work and healing is learning to process what's happening and allowing yourself to feel all your feelings.
But there can be some confusion about what that actually looks like - especially when it comes to processing versus venting. We're going to cover the main differences between the two, and how knowing these differences will keep you out of unhealthy patterns and progressing toward healing from betrayal trauma.
You’ll Learn: * How to tune into yourself and your needs so you can make space for processing * What processing looks like in real life and how to help yourself do it compassionately * Why slowing down is actually getting you to a healthier place faster
We know how important it is as a parent to connect with your child in order to establish a healthy attachment, create safety, and encourage them to talk to you when they’re facing unhealthy issues or addictions.
So when it’s your partner that’s struggling with sexual addiction, it’s common to blame their parents or be frustrated with their parents, looking for justice or validation for the issues you’re now facing.
We’re taking this opportunity to talk about some of the common thoughts our brains offer when we’re feeling threatened, when we’re facing sexual addiction or progressing through the stages of healing after infidelity, and shed some light on new ways to interpret the impact of the relationship between us and our partner’s parents.
You’ll Learn: * The role of mom and dad in supporting their adult children * Why it’s so important to heal those primary attachments in addiction * How to work through feelings of betrayal from in laws * Ways to see the relationship between your in laws and partner more compassionately * When letting go of the need to be validated shows you how to set boundaries with in laws
A question that comes up a lot in our women’s groups dealing with sexual addiction is, “Should I be talking to my kids about this?” And experts are divided on this question.
Some sexual addiction counselors say you don’t need to involve the kids or disclose anything about infidelity. Others have the opinion that because it does impact the kids, they’re entitled to know at least some of what’s going on.
Which just goes to show - every situation is incredibly nuanced.
We're giving you some points to consider about sharing with your kids, but since every situation is different, there’s no universal checklist (we know - it sucks). And because we can’t speak to every possible situation in one conversation, we’re talking in broad, general terms. We highly recommend working with a therapist or coach to navigate your particular situation.
You’ll Learn: * Ways to share, with clarity, in a way that minimizes harm to your kids * Conversation tips whether you’re staying married or pursuing divorce * How to go about supporting your kids while letting them navigate their own unique emotional journey * Why waiting for the situation to feel more positive delays healing
Remember to enter your topic idea for Amie and Alana's 100th episode! What would you love to hear them discuss? Email your suggestion, and if you want on-air credit for your topic being chosen, then please indicate with your submission! Okay - get thinking and send your topic to chooserecoveryservices@gmail.com
As much as we may want to, we can’t protect our kids from everything. They’re going to see porn, and their bodies are going to react, but they need to know it doesn’t mean they’re bad or wrong. Our job as parents is to bring these issues out into the open, talk about them, and not let them hide away to become a source of shame.
Talking to your kids about porn can be tough. But no matter how old your kids are, having conversations around sexuality is important. Just know: you don’t have to know everything and have all the answers immediately.
Today's conversation will show you how to communicate openly and effectively about healthy sexuality using the tools and resources from our conversation.
You’ll Learn: * Why it’s healthier not to have “The Talk” and what to do instead * Age-appropriate tools kids can use when they encounter porn * How to create safe, healthy conversations without shame or judgment * The best books on how to set boundaries when it comes to porn
Want support navigating your own journey? Check out our coaches here at CHOOSE RECOVERY SERVICES
Up and coming courses:
Dating After Divorce- August 26th-28th
Young Single Adult Dating and Self Empowerment Course- September 11th
Believing In You Group Coaching Program - August 10th
Resources we discussed in todays episode and for your consideration:
Good Pictures, Bad Pictures
Very Well Family
Defend Young Minds
Fight The New Drug
Jennifer Finlayson Fife
In this episode of Choose To Be, we’re walking you through some simple tools and how to respond when you discover your kids are looking at porn.
In this day and age, with the sexually saturated culture we have, our kids will be exposed to pornography. So when that happens, how are we going to respond? What will that look like?
We are giving you the tools to handle this situation when it comes up, whether your child comes to you with questions or disclosures or you discover the behavior yourself.
Some topics we cover today:
- Why pornography pulls us in in the first place
- Why exposure does not equal addiction
- How to start a conversation with your child
- What to do if your child refuses to talk to you about it
If you are suffering from betrayal trauma and want to know what your next step is, book a free consultation with us to find what is best for you and your needs. Your path to healing awaits.
Please leave a review on APPLE PODCAST so we can reach more men and women who are looking for tools to choose recovery and choose healing
We referenced Matt Fradd today, you can check out his talk HERE
Fight The New Drug Resource
Amie and Alana address the issue of when your spouse or ex is emotionally hurting your children or disappointing them over and over and over, and the impact that has on your children and on you.
A lot of big feelings come up when you see something affecting your children, and this can be a particularly difficult situation. Addiction makes it really difficult to connect with other humans, including your kids.
You want to protect them, and you’re also trying to repair the relationship that could still be causing them pain.
When there is this level of conflict in a marriage, all kids are going to be impacted. They’ve already been impacted. They feel it. Rather than trying to protect our kids from this (which probably isn’t even possible), we can offer them the space to feel the feelings that are showing up.
Some topics we cover today:
- How to practice feeling your feelings in your body and what you can learn from them
- Exercises to help you get clear on the thoughts that are underneath your fear
- Ways to support your kids through difficult times
- The thought that created a huge parenting shift for Amie
- How to create space for your kids to notice and express what they’re experiencing
If you are suffering from betrayal trauma and want to know what your next step is, book a free consultation with us to find what is best for you and your needs. Your path to healing awaits.
Please leave a review on APPLE PODCAST so we can reach more men and women who are looking for tools to choose recovery and choose healing
Join Amie and Alana in today's conversation around how to navigate relationships with your adult children when they don't see your healing work the way you do. Healing from betrayal trauma can be complex, and this shows up often when it comes to navigating your trauma with your kids. Do you ever find yourself trying to explain to your children why you need healing or why you are trying to have healthy boundaries? Do you ever fall into the trap of trying to get them to see your side of things? When children don't see the changes, boundaries and healthy independence as a positive thing it can almost feel like another betrayal. We of course want our children to be happy for us, support us and totally understand why we are making the changes in our lives! Yet, not all children will.
Some topics we cover today:
- Misconceptions and taking sides
- Emotional abuse from children
- Staying in your own control bubble, but not giving up on your children
- Attachment and children
- Becoming aware of age-related developmental issues
- Getting support
Most importantly, you doing your work truly will show them what healthy looks like and it's up to them if and when they choose to be healthy too. Keep choosing healing, recovery and of course, keep choosing YOU!
Check out Amie's TEEN and Young Single Adult programs so your child can learn some of the amazing tools you are learning as well, but applied to their own life and situations.
Alana holds an amazing interactive in-person TEEN group- check that out HERE
Are you a man who wants to understand better his wife's trauma and wants to learn more empathy? Join Alana's Help Her Heal Group or Choose's Men's 180 Group
Need more support? Check out all our amazing resources and team at chooserecoveryservices.com including workshops, webinars, healing retreats, full disclosures, and more!
Please leave a review on APPLE PODCAST so we can reach more men and women who are looking for tools to choose recovery and choose healing
Today Amie interviews a few women who were apart of the Young Single Adult Dating and Self Empowerment Course. The messages these women have for you today is inspiring to say the least. They have been through their own traumas and trials and have learned how to apply tools and concepts to help them heal, move forward in their journey and have a whole new outlook on life. Sound too good to be true? Listen for yourself. They are truly inspiring women.
If you know someone who is between the age of 18-24 share this episode along with the previous episode titled Hope For The Future. The next YSA Dating and Self Empowerment Course will be starting September 11th. You can register for your spot HERE
If you are single and over the age of 24 and would like to learn these same tools and concepts Amie FINALLY has her date for the long anticipated Dating After Divorce Course August 26th-28th. No, you don't actually have to be ready to date in order to take this course! To register for that click HERE
For more groups and courses available to help you along your journey head over to chooserecoveryservices.com
Divorce or not, how we navigate through our pain and our children's pain can be tricky. Today Amie and Alana continue their conversation with Mckenna as she talks abut her experience with divorced parents. She offers thoughts to teenagers and what she wants them to know. She offers thoughts towards moms and dads and what she feels would be Important for them to know.
Not everyone will choose to think about their parents struggle or divorce is a blessing right now, we acknowledge that many can travel down paths that can seem more destructive and yet, we believe that the power is still within you as a parent. As you do your own work and healing, as you focus on what is in your control and choose to simply love them where they are at, it leaves room for hope.
Everyone ins on their own individual journey and there is no rush but it's always a choice to lean into healing, recovery and choosing YOU.
Revive & Thrive Divorce Retreat October 20-13
Register Here https://choosedivorceretreat-9.youcanbook.me/
One of the biggest fears many have when considering the divorce option, is how will it effect the children. Of course this is a fear, there can be a lot of impacts that this brings to the child's life. Yet we don't want to underestimate the resources that are available to help children navigate this as well as not to underestimate the children themselves.
Everyone has a different experience and different story yet, sometimes it can be helpful to hear from the mouth of one who was impacted. Today we have a special guest who will share her own experience as a child of divorced parents. Hear her story, how she was impacted, and how she has navigated her own healing journey.
We hope that this provides peace in knowing that there is time to heal, that we all have the ability to choose how other peoples choices impact us, and that we get to have do-overs.
Teen and YSA resources are available HERE
Join Alana today as she shares some helpful insight she learned in a recent training around healthy connection. Sometimes we think that when we are not in conflict with out partner then we are connected, everything is "fine". But that's not the case.
Being intentional in connecting with your partner and others takes a lot more than just not arguing or negative emotions. Pain free relationships does not mean healthy relationships. Find out what this really means and how to create real healthy connection in your relationships today by tuning in to todays episode.
Join Therapist Kimberly Day and Amie Woolsey in their upcoming course to help understand the different elements of abuse that may be showing up in your relationships. To have real healthy connection in your current relationship or a future relationship, learning what healthy behavior looks like and doesnt look like will be so helpful.
Register HERE
Chooserecoveryservices.com
Join Amie and Alana today as they discuss the different aspect of change. Change in ourselves, change in our partners and why it's so hard when others aren't changing in the way we want.
They also discuss how sometimes there is an expectation of the addict to have a personality change when they find recovery from their addiction. When this doesn't happen it can bring up a lot of emotions, so Amie and Alana tackle why that is.
Change always starts with you and it's natural to have a resistance to change. Join our conversation today and we hope that you gain new insights to how this applies to you and your particular circumstance.
Visit Chooserecoveryservices.com for more information on how to get support through your healing journey.
Check out groups and courses that will be starting soon HERE!
Last week Amie and Alana talked about DARVO and gaslighting so today they tackle the question, "How do I respond to gaslighting?".
As always, where ever you are at in your relationship, even if you are divorced, this episode will be so helpful! Remember to please reach out to someone who is trained in abuse to help guide you through boundaries and other tools to navigate abusive behavior.
Abuse is nothing to ignore or sweep under the rug so please reach out to someone safe if you are experiencing abuse in your relationship. Help is available and you do't have to navigate this alone.
Please consider registering for the psycho-educational course, The Elements Of Abuse, with Amie Woolsey and therapist Kimberly Day to better assess your situation in a safe, non judgmental setting. Register Here
Head over to Chooserecoveryservices.com for more information and to get support.
To work with Amie or Alana specifically around your questions and concerns with abuse in your relationship, please feel free to book a consult.
We are re-airing last years episode for Mothers Day and wishing all of you a beautiful one. We know that many of you are also struggling this weekend and hope you can feel supported and loved from Alana and I.
Wherever you are at in your journey, please know that you are the creator of it. You have that right and capability, and one of the main goal for this podcast it to help women step into that power of creation. You are stronger and braver than you perhaps realize.
Wrap your arm around yourself and give you a big hug. We hope you consider practicing to believe that you are enough, just as you are right now. that you are whole and complete no matter what you do or don't do. That you are infinitely lovable and we love you all for listening.
Happy Women's Creation Day!
Join Amie and Alana today as they tackle one of our listeners heartfelt question around gaslighting. Recovery is already complicated and so when we add the piece of abusive behavior and character traits to the mix it can be even more confusing. We want to be careful how we use this word in relationship to addiction as well as address the reality that this is a key piece to real recovery. Deflecting and keeping from being found out is what addicts do best. Real recovery comes with a self awareness around this, an actualization of the impact the addiction has had in the lives of their spouse and those around them. Restitution is not just recovery from the addiction but healing the behaviors and flawed value system that produces abusive behavior as well.
We know that this can be a triggering topic and highly encourage those of you who think. there might be abuse in your relationship to reach out to someone who is qualified to guide you in this area of your recovery and healing. We know that change is possible when awareness is present, acceptance is allowed and application is initiated.
PLEASE leave a review! We'd love for this podcast to reach more people who are in desperate need of resources and help to navigate their healing journey like you are. Leaving reviews and sharing helps tremendously! Thank You!!
Episodes referenced in this episode with Kim Day and Amie Woolsey can be found HERE
The Elements of Abuse Course that will be help in June can be registered for HERE
Should I Stay or Should I Go this Thursday, May5th @9:00am MT can be registered for HERE....More Info HERE
As always, thank you for listening and sending in your questions.
Choosereciveryservices.com
Join Amie and Alana as they wrap of this 3 part series on what recovery and healing look like, as well as what healthy relational behaviors look like.
Divorced? Yep, this one is for you too. It's likely you are divorced because your partner did not do this recovery work. So learning what you have a right to expect and what it looks like will help you heal and move forward.
Please feel free to send in your questions for topics you'd like us to discuss. send to chooserecoveryservices@gmail.com
For those who are interested in the webinar for young single adults on healthy relationships or the Help Her Heal group, you can learn more and sign up here: https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/events/
Alana and Amie continue their conversation around this topic of recovery for the addicted. It's tough to navigate as there are so many pieces to this. Hopefully today will help shed some light along your journey. the importance of being relational and what healthy looks like.
Is the addicted taking steps toward being honest, seeking out ways to create new patterns of healthy, or are they minimizing and justifying their behavior?
So many things to consider right? Amie and Alana have your back and are ready to talk about all of it!
Divorced? Yep, this one is for you too. It's likely you are divorced because your partner did not do this recovery work. So learning what you have a right to expect and what it looks like will help you heal and move forward.
Please feel free to send in your questions for topics you'd like us to discuss. send to chooserecoveryservices@gmail.com
Visit chooserecoveryservices.com for more information on how to get help with recovery, healing and learning how to choose YOU .
LAST DAY TO REGISTER for the TEEN Believing In You 12 week coaching program with Amie Woolsey
Click HERE to register today!
The YSA WEBINAR is this Sunday April 24th with Luke Gordon and Amie Woolsey- you don't want to miss this! For all those who want to learn how to have a healthy conversation around pornography with the one you are dating. It's not something to ignore or things you don't need. Let's learn how to talk about it and change the way we talk about it from shame to healthy from fear to connection.
To register click HERE
Join Amie and Alana as they discuss the question of 'Is my partner in recovery?'
Divorced? Yep, this one is for you too. It's likely you are divorced because your partner did not do this recovery work. So learning what you have a right to expect and what it looks like will help you heal and move forward.
Please feel free to send in your questions for topics you'd like us to discuss. send to chooserecoveryservices@gmail.com
For those who are interested in the webinar for young single adults on healthy relationships or the Help Her Heal group, you can learn more and sign up here: https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/events/
Join Amie and Alana this week and we dive into parts work, looking at the parts of you that are trying to keep you safe. Not only do we discuss how to use this tool to heal, we do a live unscripted demo on air. Tune in as Amie discovers her bodyguard part using this guided imagery to help see what this part needs. It's a rare look into how this can work for you in your own healing journey.
If you'd like more information on any of our coaches or therapists, or would like to book an online session, go to www.chooserecoveryservices.com. We have individual sessions, groups, webinars, and classes.
Important events coming up:
Luke Gordon and Amie Woolsey are hosting a Webinar for young single adults ages 18-25 and discussing the importance of having healthy conversations around pornography, addiction and healthy dating. You don't want to miss so share with a YSA today! CLICK HERE
Alana's TEEN in person group walks a small group of teen girls age 13-17 through controlling negative self talk and negative thinking and helps them gain more confidence in themselves and their abilities. Other concentrations include self esteem, loving oneself, and making connections with others. CLICK HERE
FREE group coaching for those who are stuck in making the decision to stay in the marriage or not. April 7th @ 9:00am MT To register for that CLICK HERE
For more events coming up CLICK HERE
We all experience it, trauma that is. Everyone will have a different initial response to trauma and the more we are aware of what our responses are and learn to recognize it in ourselves, the more we will be able to process it in a healthier way. Today Amie and Alana discuss the basics of the acute stress response fight, flight, freeze and fawn. Understanding these distinct responses can help explain how your experiences show up in your reactions and behavior.
Head over to Choose Recovery Services to check out all that we have going on and meet some of our new coaches!
Have a TEEN who can use a little nudge in the self worth direction? Want to help her gain tools to create healthy emotional awareness and empowerment? Does she need help learning how to have boundaries and heal from her own trauma with friends who are struggling with mental illness? So many incredible tools that teens need now days more than ever.
Join ALANA with in person teen groups HERE
Join AMIE with her virtual teen groups HERE
Check out more groups and events HERE
Today was one of those days where, it just is what it is. So we recorded an episode exactly where we were at emotionally, and thats stressed, maxed and exhausted from our own work. Yep, we still have to do our work too! We hope this episode helps not only validate that we are all continuously learning and growing, but inspire you to lean into your own authentic self - and LOVE IT!
Today we announce Amie's NEW Believing IN You TEEN coaching program for girls ages 13-17.
For more info and to get your spot click HERE
Did you miss the last Choose Recovery Conference? No worries, they are all available now, check it out HERE
Check out all our other groups and courses at chooserecoveryservices.com
This week we look closely at the APSATS model of healing form betrayal and dive into what the different stages of healing looking like. No matter where you are in your healing, healing is possible. And finding the right support, can be huge in this process. For more information on Alana and Amie, or any of our other coaches and therapist, go to www.chooserecoveryservices.com
Todays bonus episode is an interview Amie did with young single adult women who went through the YSA dating and Self Empowerment course.
It's amazing to hear such strength from these women and how much hope this creates for the future as we see generations changing because we are teaching differently, talking differently, and bringing more awareness to the importance of self love, self empowerment, and self trust to better ensure a healthy interdependent relationship for the future.
This will inspire you in your own lives and also we hope you will share with a YSA that you know will benefit from this course.
NEXT SESSION STARTS SUNDAY MARCH 13th!
For more information click HERE
Join Amie and Alana as they discuss sexual intimacy in a committed relationship, and the importance of recognizing that your body is your own.
To meet with one of our coaches or therapists online, or for a free consultation, go to www.chooserecoveryservices.com
Join our conversation today as Amie gets real and vulnerable around her personal experience with abuse. It starts with awareness. Whether you are or are not in a similar situation, you most likely know someone who is.
The more we can call it what it is, speak out about it, the healthier we become today and generations to come.
There is never an excuse for abuse.
This topic today came from an experience Amie had witnessing an abusive situation in the grocery store parking lot Enough is enough. Both Amie and Alana are committed to empowering women to have a voice and do their work to become healthy, and see their worth and value clearer than ever.
It’s these topics that most shy away from so we are asking you to join us today in the vulnerability and listen, and share.
Here are the courses that Amie talks about in todays episode:
YSA Dating and Self Empowerment Course
Starts March 13th
Elements of Abuse Course with Amie Woolsey and Kimberly Day
Choose Recovery Services
Join us today we talk about apologies, what makes a good one, what makes a bad one, and how to start the process of real amends. This tool is not just for those who are in romantic relationships, it is for anyone who has ever made a mistake or had someone make a mistake that hurts them!
If you would like more information on the groups Amie and Alana are running, or to book with them directly for one on one session, go to www.Chooserecoveryservices.com or email info@chooserecoveryservices.com
Amie is solo today and is sharing thoughts about what self love looks like and how it can help you to recognize what healthy intimacy looks like in your relationships. But it all has to start with YOU. There are some concerns around this sometimes with those who have been in a relationship with a narcissist. So the fear is that this idea can be or lead to narcissism. Amie clarifies this concern and continues to walk you through the different levels of intimacy and how you use these to connect with you, to love you and ultimately be more vulnerable to create healthy connections.
So on this holiday that is centered around couples, today it's about choosing you and loving you forever!
The YSA course that Amie mentions starts in MARCH. To register for that click HERE or HERE
For more information about the IN-PERSON TEEN course taught by Alana email alana@chooserecoveryservices.com
Visit Chooserecoveryservices.com for more courses groups and coaching
Today Alana and Amie tackle the topic of self compassion. You may be surprised after hearing this episode to learn more about what self compassion is, and is not. They walk through some common myths about self compassion and of course share real life examples of how they have struggled to practice implementing this in their own lives, but how it works when they do!
Many women who experience betrayal have forgotten how to self love. So let todays episode motivate you to practice having your own self compassion, self love and CHOOSE YOU!
P.S. Registration closes soon for THE ELEMENTS OF ABUSE COURSE with Amie Woolsey and Kimberly Day
Starts February 13th 6:00pm PT
Register HERE for your spot today!
Chooserecoveryservices.com
On today's episode Alana and Amie discuss how hold onto your unchanging identity while healing through trauma.
When you really start latching on to this new world of learning and understanding your trauma and addiction, finding safe circles and safe people and really start to put the puzzle pieces together it starts to create this level of understanding awareness and safety, and It becomes this huge relief!
Women who don't have any identity outside of their trauma or their identity is so linked to the trauma, or so linked to their husband and what he is or isn't doing, or so linked to their children and what they are doing or not doing, or their religion, what we see sometimes is the healing work gets so linked to all of these external pieces that women just really struggle to find who they are at their center.
So learning how to hold onto your center, who you really are, so you will not get lost in the sometimes deep trenches of trauma work is critical.
Join our discussion today, feel free to share on your story for those who may need this.
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AMIE
ALANA
CHOOSE RECOVERY
Upcoming courses and groups:
Elements of Abuse with Amie Woolsey and Kimberly Day
UnleashingYour Power with Alana Gordon
Healing After Divorce with Amie Woolsey
Self Betrayal is saying “yes” when you want to say “no,” self sabotaging, ignoring basic needs and self care, lying to yourself, not taking accountability for your actions, and pretending to be something other than your authentic self.
We all do it, but are we AWARE that we do it, and how often? Join the conversation today and Alana and Amie tackle this tough topic.
Trauma brings up big emotions and so there are lots of emotional needs to be. Met. But the more we suppress them the more we are in that self betrayal. So how does self betrayal show up from trauma? That’s what we discuss today.
To register for the Elements Of Abuse Course with Amie and Kim Day that was discussed in this episode click HERE
choosereciveryservices.com
Joining the conversation today is style consultant Kristen Watson. Kristen works with women all over, of all ages, stages and sizes. One of the things she notices the most is how often women feel they not only have no idea what their style even is anymore or feel overwhelm when they go shopping which often leads right to self hate, body hate and we stop looking at ourselves. Women have more negative self talk in the dressing room than any other place we go!
We invited Kristen to talk with us about the topic BEING SEEN. Kristen helps women see their strengths and their potential and not your past. We all so badly have wanted to be seen in our relationships and often when women haven't been seen, it's scary to start seeing ourselves first.
As Kristen has worked with Amie in her own personal life it's been another element of healing that has helped Amie to mend the old automatic thoughts that have been around for years. Losing yourself in trauma and feeling betrayal can alter the way you look at yourself even more than you already did.
You stop seeing what you need, and who you are. You stop looking in your eyes, looking at your body and going through life ignoring yourself. Kristen helps women not just see that they actually can create their own beautiful style but helps women to see themself as beautiful no matter what.
If you'd like to work with Kristen she has put together a special package for our listeners! Here is her website H Street Chic
For Choose To Be listeners check out her facebook live on January 25th!
Follow Kristen on Instagram HERE
Today's conversation we discuss one of those essential tools as you heal through your trauma. GROUNDING!
But honestly, every human needs this tool! Grounding is so important to practice as trauma throws EVERYTHING off.
Learning to recognize when you are NOT grounded, centered and in the present is half the battle. This can be difficult to do at first, so no self judgement here! Being aware of how this shows up for you is the first step. We discuss some common signs that can give us this warning.
Our goal is to stay in this, 'Window of Tolerance', so that we can see reality, make better decisions and move forward. To see the visual worksheet that shows this concept of the window of tolerance click HERE.
We also talk about some ways to ground that perhaps work for you, but as always, this is your journey and so listen to your own body and create your own grounding rituals. It will absolutely help in your healing and recovery.
Elements Of Abuse Course with Amie Woolsey and therapist Kimberly Day
Starting February 13th, 20th & 27th
Today we welcome our guest therapist Jody VanDrimmelen MSW, LCSW to discuss how trauma effects the brain and the body.
There is such a huge impact from betrayal trauma and there are so many that are still learning about how this has effected them. Wherever you are at in your journey, todays episode will definitely add to your understanding and knowledge.
We will discuss what trauma Is and the triggers that come because of it. So many women struggle to make sense of this and are trying to learn to recognize how their own mind and body responds to their triggers. Everyone will experience this differently so it's important to not compare your trauma to other people trauma.
Trauma responses such as fight, flight and freeze are discussed today, and Jody introduces two more responses that studies have found to also show up as a response to triggers caused by trauma.
Post traumatic growth is also something that we will talk about and would love for each of you to be able to feel the hope that can come from betrayal trauma and your own healing. Healing IS possible.
In todays episode Alana and Amie have a conversation about what it looks like to thrive and step out of victim mentality.
When you have been a victim of someone else's choices that created chaos and pain in your life. Sometimes undesirable pain, it's understandable how it feels powerless and overwhelmingly paralyzing. Sometimes the term victim takes on a negative connotation, and so it's a place we can often judge ourselves in.
There are so many subtle ways that we, often subconsciously, keep ourselves in victim mentality and yet are trying so hard to move forward and can't figure out why it's so difficult. Stepping in to your power and seeing what you do have to move forward, one step at a time, will help you not just survive, but thrive!
Join us today, leaving your own self judgment aside, and with curiosity see what your next move is to step into THRIVING!
Karpman Drama Triangle was referenced today
Choose Recovery Services
Today Amie shares a brief message during this Christmas season.
Trauma can bring many nights that are not silently filled with peace. I had so many nights where my mind just wouldn't stop thinking and thinking of all the things that were wrong and could go wrong.
So many things that where going on around me that where not holy, calm or bright. Where peace was absent and filled with chaos and turmoil and there was no sleeping in heavily peace. In fact there was no sleeping.
But we have been shown a way to ground and have been given a baby who eventually shows us how, to have a silent night of His peace. Today I share some thoughts that hopefully will give your heart a moment of grounding and perspective, hope and peace.
Merry Christmas to you all, we hope you enjoy this mini episode
ONE SPOT LEFT for Alana and Amie's women's retreat! Click HERE for info and to register!
Joining our conversation today are two of Amie's clients, Jeanine and Jori, who talk about their healing journey after divorce. Each of these women were In a place where they wanted to know how to get to that next level of healing and that included dating again. They first did the work to understand themselves and learned to love themselves fiercely. Each of these women overcame their fears of rejection enough to date again and have been able to trust again which has brought incredible joy to their lives and has made all the work they have done worth it!
We hope that wherever you are at in your own healing, even if you are not getting a divorce, as you listen to how they did the work for themselves first, you will be inspired to continue to do your own work.
If you'd like to join Amie's coaching program that starts January 5th, click the link HERE to register.
Everyone at Choose is dedicated to your healing journey, check out our team HERE
Today Amie and Alana continue their conversation to those who have loved ones that are trying to understand more of what you, the betrayed, are experiencing. Sometimes it's hard to put into words when you yourself are still trying to figure it out! So we hope that this episode also helps you too.
Todays episode comes with gratitude for the great feedback we have received from last episode on the topic, yet we had a response from a loved one who has some additional concerns to this topic, and so we thought we would address those In todays episode as there are perhaps more out there who have these same concerns.
We continue to encourage you to share these episodes with your loved ones to better understand and have empathy for the complexity of the healing that comes with betrayal trauma and the effects of abuse. However their response, please remember that your healing is YOURS and whether people you love support or understand does not have an effect on your ability to heal.
For individual help please go to Chooserecoveryservices.com and check out our team.
This episode is specifically for all those who are the family or friends of those suffering from betrayal trauma. When you are the betrayed partner, It's so hard to explain to others what exactly you are or have been experiencing. Often times others might not believe you or know how to help you in your trauma. This can feel very lonely and frustrating.
Today Alana and Amie have a message to family and friends in hopes to bring more understanding to the seriousness of this experience, as well as offer some ideas on how to help them in healthy ways. We hope that family and friends will be open to hearing more about what you are experiencing and perhaps know how to assist you in your own journey to healing.
So share this episode with those who are safe and who you want to be apart of your healing.
For more information visit us at Chooserecoveryservices.com
Today Amie and Alana talk about the dangers of comparison in our life and along our healing journey. We do this in so many ways, compare if our partner is or isn't doing the recovery work like the other partners, or why am I still struggling in anger or depression, "I should be over this by now". We compare stories and assess who's is "worse". We compare time and how long it is taking for us to see healing and change.
So many things! It can be exhausting and we hope todays episode not only help you be aware of your own brains comparing tendencies, but help you release some of those and find more peace along the journey.
Chooserecoveryservices.com
In todays episode Amie and Alana discuss even deeper into the topic of boundaries. Discussing the importance of having your own value system identified, knowing the difference between a boundary and an ultimatum or demand. Where we sometimes lack in follow through and much more.
Tune in today and whether you are in the beginning stages of boundary work or you feel like you have this down. There is always more to learn and revisiting your own boundaries to determine if they are actually working for you, or against you.
For more individual help with this in your own life go to Chooserecoveryservices.com and find your coach to help you!
Join the conversation this week as Alana does a training on boundaries! You'll hear from other women who not only have struggled with boundaries but have found growth in their boundaries as well.
Some of the topics include:
- Boundaries are what I will do or will not do to take care of myself and my responsibilities
- Boundaries are not about punishment, they are about creating space for emotional safety, and clarity on a path forward. This list is only ideas. Please work with your therapist or coach to identify your own boundaries*
The Six Basics Of Boundaries
- B: Boundaries are for you
- A: Avoid ultimatiums and threats
- S: Sustain boundaries with follow through
- I: Influence others by making requests and have voice
- C: Change yourself through your boundaries, not others
- S: Speak up and let others know what you will and will not accept
7 Steps to Creating Boundaries
- Know yourself: Take time to understand your values and what is important to you
- Know your rights as a human: Go over Vicki Tidwell Palmers Bill of Rights. Which do you believe? Which are you struggling on?
- Understand the benefits of boundaries and your own WHY
- Understand what boundaries are bing crossed
- Take time to understand what is in your control bubble and what is not
- Beginning to PRACTICE setting boundaries focusing on being clear, without apologizing, starting small as you practice, showing your behavior over words, saying what you mean and meaning what you say, starting tighter and easing up
- Evaluate your boundaries and adjust as needed
Do you find it easy to give someone else permission to rest, self care, do what they need or want but find it extremely hard to give YOURSELF permission? Perhaps you feel it's selfish, or that it's not necessary? Maybe you just don't think you are worth it, or that you have to change something first.
In todays episode Alana and Amie discuss the POWER that comes when you give yourself permission to do, well anything! We hope this episode is encouraging and motivates you today.
We want to give you permission to listen to todays episode and permission to heal, love yourself and move forward. If you would like help please reach out and book a session with one of our coaches so you can start giving yourself permission to LIVE!
Chooserecoveryservices.com
Today we have the amazing hosts of The Healing With WORTH podcast joining our conversation today! We asked Naomi and Janeen to share a little about their stories and how they came be the hosts of the popular podcast. We talk about how important it is to have support when you are going through betrayal trauma or divorce, struggles that can come up in religious culture through healing, how to know we need help, and gaining worth and empowerment in your journey. It's packed with awesomeness!
We hope today will validate and in. spire you in where you are at in your journey.
If you want to learn more about the WORTH program click HERE
For individual work check out our team at Choose Recovery Services
Today Alana and Amie share thoughts and get real about how perfectionism not only is an exhausting way to live, but it can inhibit your healing journey.
Perfectionism can be something we have had our whole life, or it can come from the onset of betrayal. Perfection around body image and making everything we do mean something about our worth and value is dangerous.
We hope today we get you starting to think about how you can recognize this in your life and find these tools helpful to start being more aware and start practicing self compassion.
Visit Chooserecoveryservices.com for more resources
Today Alana and Amie talk about how important hope is in the healing journey, but also how an unwise amount of hope can work against us. Learning to navigate this can greatly impact how we move forward. Often times we are putting all our hope in other people or even God to change things towards the expectations we have and this actually takes us out of our own power to act.
Our hope today in this episode is to help you determine where you might be in your ability to have hope and offer you tools and thoughts that will ultimately give you the hope you need to move forward.
For more help in your healing journey please reach out to our team at Choose Recovery Services
Today we are talking with a one of our awesome certified betrayal trauma coaches, Hali Roderick and Co-Owner of CHOOSE and certified life coach Luke Gordon. Triggers are a huge part of healing and also just a huge part of being human. Learning how to tame those triggers is a skill worth developing. Hali shares her thoughts and tools on how to do just that!
When the spouse who has been betrayed has these triggers, it's often frustrating and confusing to the other partner and can often cause further damage. So learning more a bout why they show up, and how they are often not because you the partner did anything at that moment, it's just part of the healing journey. Learning to work through these will not only help you get unstuck but help you heal as a couple.
To register for Hali's Transforming Your Triggers click HERE
For more information on recovery and healing, go to www.chooserecoveryservices.com and check out our awesome coaches
Due to the amazing feedback and growing interest for help and tools around the topic of abuse and addiction, Kimberly Day and myself have a NEW COURSE starting October 10th to help with this very thing!
Today I talk about how this course will be an amazing tools and place to start for those who are looking for help and haven't yet found it.
To register for this course please email your name and phone number to amie@lifecoachingwithamie.com
Spots Limited. Confidentiality strongly encouraged and implemented.
*If you have missed this course or registration is full. Please email amie@lifecoachingwithamie.com to be put on a waitlist for the next one!
Welcome to Season 2 of the CHOose To Be Podcast with Alana Gordon and Amie Woolsey. What an amazing first season and its thanks to all of you amazing listeners for joining our conversation each week and sharing it with those around you. The number of our listeners have grown more than we had hoped for our first season and hoping to reach even more! The message of hope and healing is so important for us all to not inly feel for ourselves but important to share with others who may not have any.
In the first episode of Season 2, Alana and Amie discuss the importance of acceptance in out healing journey. Acceptance is not approving, so we talk about the difference and show how the willingness to see things as they really are is where you can access the power to heal and move forward.
It's important to accept the emotions we are having as well, from sadness to anger to peace, it's about being in the present moment with all of it and seeing things as they really are. When we don't we just layer the negative emotions one on top of another and that's when we feel like life it too much to handle, that's when we feel the suffering.
What about accepting your body as it is? Amie shares her journey to accepting her body and unraveling the trauma from her past and learning to accept her body as it is. Join us in this powerful episode and we hope that you too will begin to practice accepting what is in your life so that you can not only see the reality of it, but choose to change it if and when you want!
To work with one of our amazing coaches please visit our website at Chooserecoveryservices.com
This is the last episode of Amie and Kim Day's virtual lunch date and conversation around a very difficult topic. With awareness and acceptance of reality being addressed, the next step is the power of action. Now that you see what you have control over, what's your next step. You get to pick up the pieces and rebuild your house. You start with what resonates with you, what feels right and you take it one step at a time.
As Kim and Amie mention throughout this whole series, please reach out to a professional who is experienced with this topic to help you navigate this journey. You don't have to do it alone and in many cases you can't. Please call 1800-799-SAFE if you are in immediate danger of abuse.
Amie continues her conversation with Therapist Kim Day as they discuss why it's so imperative to not only be aware of what IS REAL, but to then accept the reality of what's happening. When you can see things as they really are you put yourself in a place of empowerment, power to act. When you avoid reality and stay in denial you are stuck as a victim. Until we get to a place where we can accept the truth, it can feel very ugly and dark. Accepting what IS, moves you into truth and towards the light, hope and healing.
Join Amie and Kim's as their virtual lunch date continues.
On today's show we welcome Kim Day, LMHCA, CCPS therapist who specializes in relational abuse. For the next three weeks Kim and Amie discuss the different elements of abuse in relationships. We start the discussion today by discussing the importance of awareness.
"I spent a lot of time studying addiction and I knew that was a component, but there was this nagging feeling like I was missing something. And it wasn't until I read Lundy Bancroft's book, Why Does He Do That? That I started to put it in this other and make sense of this other picture that I had never seen. It just hadn't really crossed my mind that there was abuse in the relationship."
If you are experiencing abuse in your relationship please reach out to someone who is trained to help you navigate your path and healing.
Please call 1800-799-SAFE for more information and help with abuse
This week join us as we explore thoughts and stories that keep us stuck. As we look deeper into why we create stories, which ones are helpful, and which ones imprison us, we can break free from the trauma and continue to move forward.
If you are ready to do your own individual work, visit Chooserecoveryservices.com and check out our team to choose YOUR healing.
For more information and to register for the YSA dating program please go to Lifecoachingwithamie.com/YSA
This episode is from Amie's first webinar ever! Tune in today as she shares parts of her own journey and talks about how to move forward when you feel like you have an ocean in front of you and an attacking army behind you.
Using the biblical story of Moses and the children of Israel's escape from bondage, she likens her own to the fear that comes from moving forward and how essential it is to notice and seek the miracles in our life.
Miracles will look different to all of us, sometimes what we think isn't ever going to be miraculous ends up being the greatest miracles of all.
We know that everyone has a different journey, different paths and our desire is to help you move forward, however that looks.
We at Choose Recovery are here to help you choose healing, choose recovery and choose YOU!
Book a session today by visiting Chooserecoveryservices.com
To hear more webinars and vlogs from Amie visit Lifecoachingwithamie.com
Join us this week as we explore the stages of grief with betrayal trauma along with how to not get stuck in any one stage.
In this episode, Alana shares the critical parts of healing from betrayal and why allowing yourself to grieve is so important to your healing.
As they've studied betrayal trauma, they have found that the healing from that, directly parallels the healing of the trauma of losing a loved one suddenly. And so many of the steps that you go through when you lose one suddenly is very similar to the steps that you go through with trauma.
When you discover the sexual betrayal of your primary attachment, it plunges you into place of pain, loss and grief, and the losses are extensive. You have the loss of trust in your partner. You have the loss of the relationship that you thought you once had. This and so many more.
Our hope today is that as you learn more about what this grief looks like, you will allow for it, and make space for it. Because allowing for the grief is choosing to heal, choosing to recover and choosing YOU
To schedule an appointment with one of our coaches or therapists, go to www.chooserecoveryservices.com
In this episode Amie has a discussion with the women form her YSA Dating course. They talk about the struggles with dating in todays world, the fears that they have and how through this 11 week dating course they have found hope for their future and are learning to love themselves FIRST!
The YSA Dating Course is led by Amie Woolsey and is for single women ages 18-30. It is a weekly, online course that not only discusses pornography awareness and how to have the conversation in healthy ways, but how to recognize the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships, notice red flags, boundaries, the different levels of intimacy and so much more!
Most importantly Amie focuses on helping these women become empowered and learn what healthy looks like for themselves first. Healthy You, Healthy dating. The next class starts SEPTEMBER 7th 6:00pm MST - Share with a woman you now and SIGN UP TODAY!
Register HERE:https://ysacourse.youcanbook.me
or visit Lifecoachingwithamie.com for more info.
Today Amie is talking about how trauma can effect our ability to feel, to make decisions and to stay in reality. Learning to feel again, to connect your brain and body again takes time and practice. It's something that can keep many who have experienced trauma stuck and from moving forward for years. Learning to feel again is critical to your healing and is possible. As you practice you will start to see progress in your healing, you will have more clarity and be able to move forward.
It's so important to do the work, and we continue to encourage you to reach out to us at Choose Recovery Services to help you CHOOSE recovery, CHOOSE healing and CHOOSE YOU!
Resources mentioned in todays episode:
The Body Keeps The Score
By Bessel van der Kolk
Feelings Buried Alive Never Die
By Karol Kuhn Truman
Overcoming Trauma Through Yoga
By David Emmerson
ADDO Recovery Yoga
Today Alana and Amie continue last weeks discussion and dive into what full therapeutic disclosures are, and what they are not. There can be lots of confusion around how this works and what our expectations are. There are key things to consider before having a full disclosure as well as helpful tips and tools to prepare you to have a successful one. Choose Recovery Services is committed to helping you get a full disclosure in the most healthy and professional way possible. For more information on full disclosures and to know if you are ready for one, please reach out to us and we will be happy to walk you through this. You don't have to do this alone and hope and healing IS possible.
Visit:ChooseRecoveryServices.com or email us at info@chooserecoveryservices.com
Join Amie and Alana as we discuss trust after betrayal as we dig into some common myths and expectations.
Looking for more resources and help in your healing work? Visit https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/ and let us help you to choose recovery, choose healing and to CHOOSE YOU!
I know that things in this world, in our culture and even religious cultures need to change, and I think woman are going to drive this and change the world! Which is why I created this 12 week course for young single adults ages 18-30 years of age.
It's a game changer!
This is definitely an episode to share because we all know a young woman who needs to know what we a ll wish we would have!
Next group starts Aug 10th 6pm MST
To register email: amie@chooserecoveryservices.com
For more information on the WORTH program visit lifechangingservices.com/worth
Today Amie shares her personal experience in working through her binge eating disorder. Trauma can bring different challenges and it's important to learn how to cope with those in a healthy way. Amie shares some insight and offers tools to help those of you are coping with food or other unhealthy ways as a result of trauma.
You can find more vlogs from Amie at https://www.lifecoachingwithamie.com/blog/
Join her next Believing In You 12 week groups coaching program starting in August
https://believinginyou.youcanbook.me/
Join Alana and Amie as we explore more around boundaries and how we want other's to respond to them.
Join Alana and Aimee as we look at taking up space in your life, your relationships, and the world after you've had trauma in your life.
Join us for a continuation of the conversation with Alana and Amie as we talk more about boundaries with extended family.
For more information or to submit a question, go to www.Chooserecoveryservices.com or email us at info@chooserecoveryservices.com
Join us for part one of a two part series on in-law trauma and how extended family can impact us, often compounding trauma.
Join us today as we explore the listener question - will I ever be able to respect or trust again after betrayal?
Join us, including Luke Gordon and Scott Woolsey, for a conversation around how emotions show up in relationships and the benefits of learning to make space for them.
Join us this week as we discuss when those further on the recovery journey stumble or change course, and how to stay anchored in your own truth
Join us this week as we discuss motherhood and betrayal trauma around our desires to help our kids and those around us.
For more information of Choose Recovery, visit chooserecoveryservices.com
Join us for the conversation around Mother's Day and all of the feelings that come up with it.
Visit us at Chooserecoveryservices.com
Join us for the continued conversation around mama trauma and how trauma impacts motherhood. This week we look at the natural desire to protect our kids and how that shows up in our trauma.
For more information on our hosts or any of our other coaches and therapists, go to www.chooserecoveryservices.com
For those who have children while going through trauma have an additional layer of complexity to their trauma. Join us for the conversation as we discuss mama trauma and motherhood.
To book a session with one of our therapist or coaches, go to www.chooserecoveryservices.com
Join Amie and her husband Scott as they discuss the triggers they both faced in a new relationship after their divorces, and how they learned to navigate them.
For more information on Choose Recovery or to book a session, go to ChooseRecoveryServices.com
Join us for our conversation today exploring objectification amid betrayal and addition. We are honored to have with us Rachel Augustus, LMFT to explore ways that objectification is affecting us, and how to start shifting into a healthier mindset.
Join us for a conversation around building connection after betrayal and four key characteristics that need to be learned and practiced
Join us for the conversation as Alana and Luke Gordon discuss common missing pieces that couples miss in their couples recovery.
Join us for our conversation about how to find yourself again after trauma. We are joined this week by Ashly Hunter, as we explore tools to reintegrate into our body and life again.
On the show we discuss the Choose Joy Retreat. To learn more about this betrayal trauma retreat, go to Chooserecoveryservices.com or Chooserecoveryservices.podia.com. We'd love to see you there!
Join us for a conversation around making hard choices. We tackle when and how we might give our power away to other and how to start reclaiming this back.
Join us for the continued discussion with Sam Tielemans, LMFT who has the podcast Couples Healing From Pornography Addiction as we tackle the discussion around the label of "addict" and "betrayed."
This week we are joined by Sam Tielemans, LMFT to talk about couples work after sexual addiction and betrayal.
For more information on Sam, go to www.coupleshealing.org where you will find all of the services he offers including a link to his podcast.
To book a session with any of our coaches or therapists, or to get more information on Choose Recovery, go to Chooserecoveryservices.com or email us at info@chooserecoveryservices.com
Join us to talk about active recovery through the lens of being not so active! For more information or to book a session with one of our therapists or coaches, go to ChooseRecoveryServices.com
Join Alana and Amie and we discuss what consent in a marriage and dating really means, and the power you have over your own body.
Free coaching call with Amie to help you sort through the difficult question, 'should I stay or should I go?'
For more information visit Chooserecoveryservices.com/events
Join us for the conversation around how we each have our own story and how to empower ourself to accept and own our story.
To learn more about Choose Recovery visit us at Chooserecoveryservices.com
This week we are wrapping up our boundaries series with a discussion around boundaries, non-negotiables, and the fears around standing up for ourselves.
Join us for the continued discussion around boundaries. This week we talk about the need to own our own reality, and how this can make a difference in our ability to have healthy boundaries.
Join us for a conversation on where and how to start boundaries!
For more information on Alana and Amie, or any of our Choose therapists and coaches, go to Chooserecoveryservices.com or email us at info@choosrecoveryservices.com
Choose healing, choose recovery, choose you.
Join us as we discuss the need to honor ourselves, what gets in the way of this, and how we can do it a way that is Christlike.
For more information or to meet with one of our therapists or coaches, go to Chooserecoveryservices.com or email us at info@chooserecoveryservices.com
When trying to find support, the big question becomes "Where do I find it and which is best?" Join the discussion around your options and choose the path that is best for you!
For more information on our coaches and therapists, go to Chooserecoveryservices.com or email info@chooserecoveryservices.com
Sometimes we struggle to invest in ourselves. Join Alana and Amie as we talk about the challenges and joys of investing in YOU.
The road to recovery can be a long and difficult road. When you don't know where you are headed and how to get there, it can feel even more daunting. Join Alana Gordon -MFTI, Amie Woolsey - Betrayal Trauma Coach, and Luke Gordon - Sexual Addiction Coach for a discussion around healing and what the road to recovery consists of.
To have a visual of the recovery map, download it at https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/podcast.
To schedule a session with any of our therapists or coaches, go to Chooserecoveryservices.com or email us at info@chooserecoveryservices.com
Join us for the conversation on trauma responses and triggers.
For the trauma kit go to https://www.chooserecoveryservices.com/podcast
Questions or feedback, email us at info@chooserecoveryservices.com
Welcome to the Choose To Be Podcast! Here at Choose Recovery, we are committed to your healing. You're invited to be part of the conversation and we explore what healing and moving forward look like. Hosts Alana Gordon, Marriage and Family Therapist Intern and Amie Woolsey, certified betrayal trauma coach talk about tools for healing, interview experts in the field, and invite others to join the conversation who have walked the path of healing. We use the betrayal trauma model with a Christ and God centered focus. We look forward to having you join us!
For more information, go to Chooserecoveryservices.com or email us at info@chooserecoveryservices.com