Beyond the 1st Response: Recent Episodes
Christy Lister and Robyn Mikel
Beyond the 1st Response brings first responders, families, and mindset together for serious and humorous conversations on mental health.
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy talks with Dr. Cheylynn Lee, a police Psychologist specializing in operations and officer wellness.
The Start
When Cherylynn first started as a Psychologist, she volunteered at Santa Barbra Sheriff’s Department, bringing her skills to Sheriff’s Department as a way to differ them the experience of mental wellness in the field. Just a few years later, she wrote her own job description and created a force to be recokoned with.
The Job
Dr. Lee is the director of the Behavorial Science Unit, which houses the peer support group. Lee also handles the debriefings for other departments and is on the negotiator team. Oversees the CIT Training and so many more jobs.
Family
Dr. Lee, is not only part of the LEO family, but she is raising two young children. Teaching them to understand what she does and the importance of helping to make the world a safety place. Thanks to her husband, who is able to be a huge part in stepping up for the children’s care when duty calls at all hours.
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara talked about moving forward after loss and trauma.
Communicating Traumas
Christy and Ciara talked about how talking about your traumas is essential in healing, helping your mental health, and how you could be helping someone.
Holding in your feelings and not talking about the things hurting you is part of the stigma, and why we talk so much about communicating them in a healthy way.
“Trauma isn’t neat and tidy—it doesn’t arrive neatly packaged and tied up with a bow. Instead, it’s bewildering and chaotic. We may want to talk about it, but we don’t know what to say or how to say it.”
Part of the reason people believe to not talk about it is because of not understanding the process of healing and helping. For a long time society has taught us to not share our sorrows, our traumas, or our mental states. Talking about it was frowned upon. That stigma still happens every day, but being open and sharing your story is a healthy way to get through your battles.
We had a hard conversation about relationships and trauma. When we say “relationships” it’s not just your relationship with significant others, but friends, family, even work. How they can negatively impact you, and your “triggers,” just because they may be struggling you feel like all your past bubbles to the surface. It doesn’t minimize what they are going through, but it can affect you to the extent that you shut down.
What can you do on a daily basis to help you in these difficult times? What tools have you used to recognize that feeling and get through?
As a society we have become desensitized to traumas, and that isn’t ok. It is when we all quit feeling and losing compassion. We need to be listening to each other, and encouraging each other to speak up. Support one another through the trauma, and encourage the healing.
Don’t Extinguish Your Fire
Remember you are your biggest advocate, only you can help and heal you. Recognize the good and bad in your life and continue working through them, even if they are bad behaviors/coping skills, recognizing them sets you on a road to healing.
Don’t let anyone ever tell you that your work isn’t good enough, if you are doing the hard work you are succeeding. Their inner turmoil is not for you to fix. We can only fix ourselves, and when doing so we are setting those boundaries for not just the people around us but also for our own inner peace.
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Meditation AppYou Will Learn This Too Late Podcast
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In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Ciara talk with Dave Dyke, a form police officer from Minnesota, about life Beneath the Badge.
They Didn’t Ask
Dave had been struggling with the calls piling up inside him over the years. Until one day, he just couldn’t take it anymore. After having a mental health crisis, he spends five days inpatient at a behavioral health facility. He went in a Monday, left on Friday, and right back to the streets vested up on the following Monday. The department knew Dave had spent five days inpatient. However, they didn’t ask questions, and he didn’t offer any. Right back to the grind of what brought him down, to begin with. How is there no fit for duty or buddy checks on him during the shifts?
The Final Call
After the brutal murder of a 15-year-old boy by his step Father, Dyke couldn’t do it anymore. That wasn’t the first call that started him down the path of PTSD, but it was the last call. Dave’s wife, Christie, recognized the need for her husband to seek proper help and get out of a job that started to make him a shell of a man.
Beneath The Badge
After going to Utah for treatment with the support of his family, Dave and Christie wanted to start conversing with first responders and their families. Changing the conversation from I don’t want to talk about my day, to it was a good, bad, or worse day. They candidately share the struggles, signs, and support to get through what so many families silently live within their four walls.
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara talked about moving forward after loss and trauma.
The 3 C’s
Christy and Ciara talked about how moving forward can be so hard, but having healthy relationships with significant others and friends and family can be achieved after loss and trauma.
They talked about how, even while using healthy tools, a relationship can still struggle in unspoken ways.
The 3 C’s are perfect examples of how to continue building and growing within your relationships effectively. How we use these can vary from relationship to relationship, but it is essential to recognize them.
Choose - How can this help you heal? How can you move forward? What can you choose to do to make healthy steps forward?
Connect - How can you connect to yourself on a deeper level? Have you avoided a deeper connection with loved ones? What can you do to help connect and understand relationships?
Communicate - This is something we all can struggle with. We shut down because it is easier to not talk about our feelings and thoughts. How about instead, we communicate those feelings? It doesn’t always have to be spoken words. Even writing them down is communicating them. You should even be communicating within yourself. It is ok to talk to yourself. It is healthy to let feelings out.
So, how can you incorporate the three Cs into your life? What can you change to grow in your relationships?
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Getting Blue Grit
In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy had a profound discussion with Eric Tung, a highly respected police commander, department wellness coordinator, and peer support leader. They delved into the crucial topic of open conversations and the need to normalize processing the events that occur at work and home, a subject Eric is particularly well-versed.
Blue Grit Wellness
Eric, has been straightforward with the need to have conversations about the effects of the job, both at work and home. Leading by example, he shares the grit of the blue on the mindset with anyone who will listen. Change has to start somewhere. Moving up the ladder from Seargent to Commander, Tung still remains in the same mindset of work-out for your body, and process for your mind. This is a hard task for any first responder, but as a leader, it needs to continue regardless of what stripe you wear.
Family
Raising children in a family that is exposed to traumatic events is a feat in itself. Teaching resilience, self-awareness, and how to make it normal to have feelings, is even more difficult in today’s world. Eric and his wife are taking the tools they have learned and giving them to their child every day. Healthy minds, make healthy children.
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In today’s Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara talked with Greg Podolak, a blended clinician for first responders at Halfwild Counseling.
The Calling to Help
Greg’s story is inspiring and humbling at the same time. Greg came from a family of first responders and had his sights set on being a police officer. His dad was a New York City officer who served on 9/11. His brother is also an officer. However, during his schooling, his mindset changed. He already knew the other side of the badge, but his eyes were opened more, and that is when he decided to go into the mental health side of helping our first responders. Greg is also a director at VALE Virginia Law Enforcement Foundation. He is also an instructor at REBOOT Recovery, a program for first responders and veterans to help heal PTSD and trauma so they can live healthier lives.
While in school, he worked in conjunction with the EMS office to study cumulative trauma within the EMS field. This really opened his eyes to the traumas that occurred daily for first responders. He even noticed himself holding on to the traumas and unable to cope with them at times. This helped pave the way for him to help officers in the field.
A blended clinician is one that practices in the office, but also in the field. Greg does many ride-alongs with officers to assist with traumatic calls, bridge that gap from a “therapist,” and gain the officers' trust to help them process their traumas on the job.
Greg found his passion in helping first responders, understanding their traumas, and wanting to change how they perceive a clinician. He talks about the “out of the normal” ways he works with the men and women of the community and how he believes this helps the trust he is earning from them.
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Reboot RecoveryVALE Foundation
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara talked with Elizabeth Fiorenza, Anaheim Firefighters Association.
Is This The End?
In this episode, Christy and Ciara continue the conversation with Elizabeth about her and Matty’s relationship, her personal struggles, and what may have been the end.
Elizabeth recalls the day Matty had tried to take his life, and she had decisions to make. Death or divorce. Elizabeth knew Matty needed help but was also learning she needed help herself. She needed to get healthy, and that day, she decided to leave. She moved out of their home and started the path of her own program and healing from her traumas. She talks in depth about how she struggled so much with the next phase of her and Matty, she didn’t want to be a victim but also didn’t want to end her marriage because she knew Matty was good he was just sick.
Chicago Reset
We hear about Elizabeth’s experience going to Chicago and having the treatment Stellate Ganglion Block at Stella Center to have the Stellate Ganglion Block treatment with Matty. The good, bad, and ugly of the trip and how successful it was. She found herself alone in a dangerous city because of anger with Matty. Elizabeth talks about the shot and her “tough neck” with the treatment. She tells us how amazing it was; she was able to stop people pleasing and really stop to smell the roses. Elizabeth tells us about how a walk around Lake Michigan changed her, and she was able to heal from a deep-rooted pain within her and the adoption of her first daughter.
We learn about personal health problems Elizabeth had faced and how a little gift happened in Chicago, Ultimately, it changed her path and her desire to be healthier and healthier within their marriage.
She knew that they both had a lot of work to do bringing a child into the world, and they both needed to really work their programs to move forward healing.
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara talked with Elizabeth Fiorenza, Anaheim Firefighters Association.
The Past Comes Forward
In this episode, Christy and Ciara had hard and raw talks with Elizabeth about how her past trauma came forward to a head with her relationship with Matty and how she worked through her traumas, both the past and present, to be part of the change in their marriage.
Elizabeth shared some emotional and painful memories of her childhood and how those “molded and shaped” who she was and what she thought love and life were. The life experiences she went through, even as a child, unfortunately, taught her unhealthy coping skills, addictions, and codependency. While so many of us can resonate with it, we each have our journeys. Elizabeth talks about how her relationship with Matty started and how unhealthy they both were from the beginning, but how she truly felt she was helping him. Elizabeth talks about how she lost family members and didn’t even want to hear what anyone had to say about Matty and her relationship and all the red flags.
Elizabeth shared the absolute and ugly truths about her and Matty’s dysfunction and how she coped with the relationship, even as she was starting to see how unhealthy it was. They stuck through the mud and began the process of healing separately and together.
*Note that this is a two-part episode. With so much to talk with Elizabeth about, we decided to split it up. So please join us next week to hear the rest of our conversation about Elizabeth, her journey, and her next steps.
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara talked with Matthew Fiorenza retired City of Anaheim Firefighter.
Struggles, Resilience, and Purpose
During his years at the Anaheim Fighter Department, Matty Fiorenza has learned to overcome and find strength in resiliency. He opened up about the traumas and battles he fought within himself. Matty shared the failures in his personal life because of addiction and PTSD and the consequences of it, along with not being able to face his traumas. Fiorenza has an angel on his side, his wife has helped him so tremendously through the darkest times, and how she even saved his life. Matty has since retired and now dedicates his time to helping others. Matty attended Recovery First, a First Responder Treatment Center, to combat the addiction and start working through the traumas.
PTSD911
While listening, you may recognize Matty or his story, as he is the firefighter featured in PTSD911. If you haven’t seen the movie, you should not just watch it for first responders but for all. We spoke about how important it is for people to understand the traumas they go through daily and that seeking help is so important. Matty talked about the different events documented in the film, along with the passing of his good friend, dispatcher Nicole Ford, EOW 8-2-23.
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara spoke to Craig Lewis, former police officer and co-founder of Guardian Garage
A Wake Up
We had the pleasure of meeting Craig, former police officer for Maricopa County Sheriff Office where he served for 24 years. He spoke on how he used unhealthy tools after a shift, while knowing what he was doing but not knowing really how to change it. Craig had his own lingering issues from incidents on the job that were affecting his everyday life. Craig’s wife had “that” talk with him.
Guardian Garage
Craig and his brother Rob were together one day looking over Craig’s “hobby space” and came up with the idea of Guardian Garage. Rob served 12 years in the Army which included deployments. He too knew the effects of PTSD and how it affected lives. So the idea was to build a place where first responders and veterans can go and start a healing journey using the brain and hands in a healthy and creative way.
As Craig tells us about the mission to serve first responders and veterans their idea came to fruition, and then grew. He talks about how they are planning to expand past just working on cars, and metal work. But to start in the wood working, and ceramics. Any creative ways to bring the ones who need it in and give them a hobby.
They both had the passion and knowledge of just how hard it can be to work through the stresses and traumas from their callings to serve. Craig explains to us the garage and how it has helped others heal. Some come with never picking up a tool ever, and some bring experience. But all collaboratively they start a new journey. As Guardian Garage’s page says “Where Cars are more than metal - they’re a means to restore lives and ignite hope”.
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara spoke to Kelly Klaber, a First HELP family member.
A Mother’s Pain
To say we had the honor of speaking to Kelly is an understatement. This was the first time since Brittany took her life that she has told their story.
February 12th 2017 a mother’s worst nightmare unfolded. Kelly was notified that Brittany had died by suicide. Kelly shared with us how her days and weeks unfolded after. What she learned about Brittany’s mental state and how Brittany didn't want her to know how much she was struggling.
Kelly found out after receiving Brittany’s phone that Brittany had reached out to the crisis line but was put on hold so she never was able to talk to anyone. She was trying so hard to help herself and seek help. She was having trouble with her medication, she was reaching out and talking about how she was feeling. So what happened? We may never know, but we all agreed the lack of training for a mental health crisis within the department(s) was apparent. She said “keywords”, and had that been a civilian on a call there was a protocol in place. But, for a dispatcher in mental crisis, there was nothing.
The Department’s Grief
Kelly shared with us the supervisor and how she tried to help Brittany with the tools she had. How they spoke about Brittany’s mindset and the supervisor cared about Brittany. She shared the EAP information with Brittany and respected what was asked of her not to do. We talked about how Brittany’s suicide could have affected her, and we hope she carries no guilt.
We commend Brittany’s department, Georgetown Scott County, for all they did for the family. They honored her just the way she deserved, and helped the family with true compassion. They continue to honor and remember Brittany to this day.
This is something all departments should be doing after they lose a first responder to suicide. Their death should never be treated differently than another first responder’s death. PTSD (I) are real and these are the conversations we need to be having on how to prevent more suicide. How we can be helping those who are struggling and helping them see that they are not alone. We need to see more training established in departments on how to recognize mental struggles amongst their co-workers, listen for those keywords, and give the space for people to say “I am not ok, I need help.”
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara enjoyed talking to Chaplain Chaz Blackburn, a Nevada chaplain who advocates for First Responders and their family's mental wellness.
Being a Chaplain
According to Chaz, being a Chaplain has done more for him personally than it has done for our community. He states this because, as he is raising his daughter, he has been able to take some of the tools he has learned and use them not only to decompress but also to teach her how to express her emotions healthily. Grief is something that everyone experiences, even children. Navigating what causes grief and what tools to use has helped. When his daughter lost her hedge to cancer, she had the tools that gave her the ability to work through the loss.
Chaz speaks openly about being a chaplain and what trials and tribulations come, including sadness and trauma. He talked about how they serve their first responders in their community, along with how they serve each other after traumatic experiences and calls, so they, too, can decompress and not compound their emotions.
Great Basin Chaplain Corp
Great Basin Chaplain Corp is where Chaz found his calling, serving as a Chaplain and wanting to help make a difference in his community through compassion, speaking out, and serving, with his undeniable calling to help others during difficult times. Unfortunately, there is a need for more chaplains. Whether a civilian or first responder, chaplains are as needed as first responders, and the shortages are real.
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Great Basin Chaplains Facebook
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara had a conversation about a quote from a police chief that they read and how that mindset does damage to first responders.
Words Can Sting
“Our focus is to get our officers back to work where they can put it behind them the best they can” was a direct quote from a police chief after 3 officers were involved in a shooting and the suspect died. Of course, the focus is for officers to get back to work, but that shouldn’t be the focus, and that is part of the stigma.
Allowing first responders to have the space to heal and go through their emotions is a gift that any chief could give them. Helping the first responder go through the trauma and providing healthy tools is an essential part of ending the stigma. Not only does it help the first responder, but it helps the family behind the badge. They, too, can learn the valuable tools to support their first responder. It also helps the coworkers, and they will see it is ok not to be ok; it is ok to ask for help.
These are the stigmas we are talking about. Change doesn’t always have to happen from the top; you can be the change. A group of you can be the change. Words are a powerful tool, and using them to stand up for your mental health is ok.
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara thought they would change it up to give listeners great ways to get involved in their community and beyond.
Giving Back
Giving back to your community or something you hold near and dear to your heart can be a healthy and rewarding life experience. Simple gestures for your local first responders up to volunteering at your local TIPS organization are all great things. Support your local AFSP walks to help end suicide; create a team and walk in solidarity.
Find what brings you happiness without overstepping your personal health boundaries! Whether in person or monetary, all aspects of volunteering matter, and what helps organizations continue on!
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First HELPNAMIAmerican Foundation for Suicide PreventionGary Sinise FoundationTrauma Intervention ProgramVolunteer Match
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara had the pleasure to speak to Amy Row. The wife of former police officer Vance Row whom we had on the show previously.
The Hard Talks
We got to meet Vance and hear his story last week, and today we got to meet his wife Amy. As we always say “we are here to have a conversation” and that is just what Amy did with Vance to help save him.
Amy shared what it was like when Vance was going through his hard mental and physical times. How their lives had changed and the peaks and valleys. Amy shared all their vulnerable times and realizes now just how grateful she is for having that open communication with her husband. We had the hard conversations about her feelings and emotions, and even trust through the hard times.
Amy talks about how she has supported Vance while still maintaining her healthy boundaries, even not being as into Yoga as him. Having the conversation with Amy, she talks about the tools that she used to get through the hard times and how they helped both of them overcome the negative and start creating a healthier life.
Turn Your Mess into Your Message~ Robin Robbins
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara had the pleasure to speak to Vance Row, a retired police officer who is now a dispatcher and yoga instructor.
Physical & Mental Injuries
Vance told us his story of his years in policing, injuries on the job, and how he used alcohol to cope. He went through his lowest points and how he contemplated taking his life. His wife was the one to speak up and show him what he was doing. Vanc told us how when remembers in his academy
they briefly spoke about police suicide and then it became real to him as a close friend and co-worker took their life. Vance is now retired from policing, but he still serves his community as a dispatcher.
The Positives from the Negative
It was then that Vance turned to yoga and sobriety. Vance started on a Yoga journey to help his mental health and body ailments and then realized how impactful it can be. He then got his certification for being a yoga instructor and now teaches classes all around the Ocean City Area, you can find some of his short videos on YouTube! He talks about the challenges he faced when he was first starting and the challenges when introducing yoga to first responders, but how often someone tells him that the yoga classes helped.
Vance also serves his first responder community by being a part of First responder Recovery meetings. These meetings are for all first responders and are completely confidential. He knew the need for help in recovery and seized that opportunity to continue helping his fellow responders. He also volunteers for COPLINE and spoke about the amazing program for our police officers needing help.
COPLINE 1-800-267-5463
The two most important days are the day you are born and the day that you find out why. - Mark Twain
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara speak about how your finances can affect your overall mental health.
Finances and Mental Health
The stressors of debt and the “control” over finances can burden and weigh you down, while also affecting your relationships. While debts can be avoided, some can not, learning how to manage and budget your finances can help ease the stressors, and positively help your overall mental health. There is even a stigma of debt that keeps people from asking for help. People who have debt or trouble managing finances are more likely to have mental health issues, add that into the job trauma, and it can be a hard hole to climb out of. Even if asking for help is just asking your spouse or partner to take over part of the finances. Or sitting down together and creating a budget. It is okay to let go of that and trust in the help.
A study from the Royal College of Psychiatrists on Debt and mental health found that half of all adults with a debt problem also live with mental ill-health. This ranged from a consistent feeling of anxiety and low mood to a diagnosed mental health condition.
You are not alone, according to a survey done by CNBC as of 10/31/23, found that 62% of Americans live paycheck to paycheck. That is an incredibly high number, and just shows that a lot of us are struggling too.
Setting Healthy Financial Goals
There are ways to alleviate the stress and get yourself into a healthy “debt mind-space.” Setting a goal can be as simple as writing down your monthly expenses, or as intricate as making a binder with your monthly statements, costs, and a well-planned out budget. Whatever that case may be, use that goal to feel better overall. Split some financial tasks with your spouse or significant other. Have the conversation that you, or them, may be avoiding. Set yourself up for success, even with just small changes, you can move forward with a healthier financial lifestyle.
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Debt & Money Issues Affect Mental Health
62% Paycheck to Paycheck
I Will Listen Ruck
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara speak about how setting your “bar high” can help you be mentally and physically healthier.
Are you stepping over your bar?
Christy and Ciara talked openly about how changing the “height” of your bar can positively affect your life. So many times in life we find ourselves settling out of our comfort and maybe even fear. But how does that negatively affect your professional and personal life? More often than not, we set our professional standards and goals higher than we do our personal goals when we should be keeping them at the same level.
Lowering the bar we set in our lives allows others the space to use us as a doormat and disrupt the healthy paths we want to take.
Guide on Setting Your Goals Higher
When it comes to setting goals, it will vary from person to person, job to job, etc. But learning a few tips that you can take and use personally and professionally will help you raise your bar. Often, it feels like we excel at one place in our life but seldom does it feel like it is balanced on both ends.
Play to your strengths, if time management is a skill that you rock, use it, to your advantage. Finding time to take deep breaths and breaks during the time management skill, will help deescalate the stress of feeling that you are failing. Stop going down the what-if hole of the small stuff. Small stuff only becomes big when we don’t take to time to look at the big picture and process. If you are good at doing this at work but not at home, evaluate what you are doing differently at work than at home. One of the best tools, to have with you at all times, learn from peers, friends, and family. Yes, everyone is different. But you can tune that skill, to your situation, and find the balance and success, on both sides of the job.
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Don’t Be a Doormat
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In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Ciara talk about the negative mindset and how to overcome Misanthropy.
Misanthrope
According to the Webster's Dictionary, Misanthrope is a person who hates people. We may have a lot of hostility going around in a world that just doesn’t let us catch up and take a breath. Are you a recovering Karen, or are you still stuck in the world of I hate people?
Point of View
How we perceive events in our environment and lives starts with mindset and processing to let go of the stress, the event, and the chaos that life and the job pack into your duty bag. You are most influenced by the five people you spend the most time with. Are you surrounded by those that are positive or the haters? Saying this doesn’t mean you can’t have a bad day; you can recognize, evaluate, and adjust to what the workplace, home place, or society is throwing out of you. Change can happen, even in the worst of environments. Find something that makes you laugh, look people in the eyes, and smile; you never know who needs that positive in this moment. When we start doing this, the dark times become less opaque, and we realize you are not alone!
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara speak about the challenges of the Holidays in First Responder families
Healthy Family Dynamic
In a healthy family dynamic it is understood that the first responder will not be able to be home on the day, especially as rookies, or if you are in an on-call position. We say healthy family dynamic, because a healthy supportive family understands the new normal without pressure or anger for your job serving the community.
How may this look for you, your family? It may not look much different, but it may be just making a new tradition, or setting your healthy boundaries for the day. Communicate, take your breaks, find the time for you! But also find the good in those times, enjoy the moment, be grateful for what you have and are able to give!
There is Always a First
If this is your first holiday season without your loved one, or even as a first responder, please remember that it is ok to say no when you’re overwhelmed. To know that your feelings are valid and you don’t have to spend the time with family. That maybe it is your friends and time with them that you may need to get through. That it is ok to not be ok. This time of year can come with a lot of heavy feelings and pressure. Boundaries and the word NO are perfectly acceptable, and we encourage you to use them for you to find your happiness and good spaces!
Show Links
Open your blinds!
Seasonal Affective Disorder
The Best Happy Lights
I Will Listen Ruck
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Christy: FacebookLinkedIn
Ciara: FacebookLinkedIn
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First H.E.L.P.
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy talks with Nancy Vallee, a retired 911 dispatcher of 21 years. Nancy speaks frankly about transitioning from first responder life to retired, new career, and finding the new you!
Retirement
Nancy started a career as a realtor before retirement, getting her license, selling homes, and preparing for the future. What she didn’t plan on was the barrage of emotional deflation. Newly married, new home, new career, all great things happening, you can’t help but think, this is going to be a fantastic new chapter in life. She prepared, being 55 at retirement, still young with a whole life ahead of her. She never expected the darkness she had seen before to come back. Nancy was preparing to leave the job; she didn’t know the job wasn’t ready to let go of her.
Family
Nancy was a single mother, taking care of her children and then her mom. Working 60-hour work weeks, her kids were used to her not being around for school events, etc. The village of friends that helped her with the kids when she couldn’t be there was powerful. But what happens to the family when they are unprepared for your retirement? Sometimes, they become the silent partners of your demise without even knowing it. Nancy’s husband recognized first that she wasn’t herself. How do you tell someone you love that they have changed when the person you love doesn’t see it in themselves? You just have to speak up! Be there for them, and let them work to find themselves again. We can only do so much for our loved ones, but if they don’t do the job, then they can’t get out of the dark place. Thankfully, Nancy started realizing that she didn’t like how life was making her feel and that it didn’t have to do with the new chapter but had everything to do with the old branch. Family is there for you and more robust than you think. Give them a try and start having conversations.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Baird and Warner
Wescom 911 Communications Center
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Nancy Vallee
Christy: FacebookLinkedIn
Ciara: FacebookLinkedIn
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First H.E.L.P.
In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara speak with Captain Dave Betz of the Chelsea Police Department and coping with the loss of his son to suicide.
Police Family
Dave has served as a police officer for over 36 years. 35 of them with Chelsea Police Department. Dave speaks about his years of service, and the traumas on the job. How not just him but the department handled them. Like many others with years of service, he would compartmentalize and not deal with the things that happened and what he saw on the job.
All that changed on February 22nd 2017. Dave speaks openly about the day his son, David Betz III, died by suicide after serving as a police officer for 4 years. Dave speaks about finding his son and the traumas that caused him, along with bringing so many up to the forefront of his memory. Along with the department and how eye opening it was for them when David died. As he talks about it is ok to “have a check up from the neck up” and that mental health needs to be checked everyday. Ask the hard questions.
David’s Ribbon
Dave talks about how his loss has sparked him to make changes. That is how he crossed paths with Karen from 1st HELP (at that time Blue HELP). They were at a state legislature meeting with another family of police suicide to make the change within their state together.
Since then his voice and reach has grown larger, and he as he stated since David couldn’t continue to be a cop so he will and bring change to the policing world.
He first created a blue suicide awareness ribbon to recognize that cop suicides do happen and it needs to be talked about. Then with his city, they created stickers and street signs that have the 988 number along with the police badge resting in hands. So it is out there to the public, that everyone is in this together and it is ok to reach out for help.
Lastly, the mental health miranda. Which applies to everyone, not just police officers or first responders. We all need to stop and remember we all have the right to go on living.
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Dave Betz LinkedInFacebook
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Ciara: FacebookLinkedIn
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara discuss Sgt Alonzo Montanya's dedication to the Dutchess County Sheriff’s Office to break the mental health stigma in his department and countrywide.
Mental Health Advocate
Alonzo has had his struggles. His second change has given him a tool that many don't understand. Alonzo has been at rock bottom like those he helps on the street and in the department. they have helped him help others and speak about mental health within departments. Alonzo speaks about how he saved Chris Jolicoeur from taking his own life and the repercussions of his heroic act. But really, that one heroic act started years before at Alonzo’s bottom. His life was at its lowest when he checked all those boxes. Alonzo's path is not just about saving Chris’s life but how he speaks, actively and openly, about his story to save others and have that healthy impact.
Youth and Police
Alonzo also dedicates time to Youth & Police Initiative, commenting on how it has opened his eyes to how much our youth and the police “circles” are so much alike and why they both have the highest rates of suicide. The parallel between an officer's struggle and our youths' struggle, recognizing it and learning from it to help our communities on both sides of the badge, is admirable. How can we all be proactive like Alonzo by changing our first responders' worlds and our children? Challenge yourself by sitting and thinking deeper on this and, even more so, see how you can bring this to your community with your children.
SoPo Pottery
Continuing to raise awareness Alonzo and his wife, Donna, started…SoPo Pottery. In the light of the darkness of shutdowns, they started making pottery supporting the police. Like how cool!! Check them out!
Chicago Marathon
Please help Alonzo reach his goal and raise awareness for first responders' mental health! A $26.02 donation for the 26.02 miles he will be running makes a difference! 2023 Chicago Marathon
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Dutchess County Sheriff's Office
SoPo Pottery
Wolf Den Of Heroes
The Wolf Hudson Valley’s New Country
Youth & Police Initiative
Alonzo Montanya Facebook
Christy: FacebookLinkedIn
Ciara: FacebookLinkedIn
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First H.E.L.P.
Sara Clow: My Story Is My Voice
In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara chat with Sara Clow about how her life changed five years ago and what she’s doing now for change. She is a remarkable human who shows such resilience!
Her Story
We talked with Sara about her story and courage to speak up. She lost her law enforcement husband just over five years ago to suicide, and that has helped drive her to change how mental health is viewed and handled within our departments and community.
Sara now works for NAMI as the CIT Program Director in Northern Nevada. She talked about how all states have the CIT (Crisis Intervention Training), but some do not have it mandated, like Nevada does. All law enforcement agencies must undergo the 40-hour training to help recognize mental illness during calls and how to de-escalate these calls so that people don’t have to be handcuffed because of mental illness. The other side of that is having the talks and telling her story to our first responders, so hopefully, they can recognize their mental health struggles and that it is okay not to be okay.
Sara also sits on the board of the American Foundation of Suicide Prevention - Nevada chapter! She chats with us about what that entails and how her two crucial roles with each organization “work” together to help raise awareness for suicide prevention within our community.
Sara is a fantastic friend and advocate within our community and beyond. She works hard to make the change and get things done. Ciara is fortunate to call her a friend and proudly stand next to her in breaking the stigma!
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
NAMI
American Foundation for Suicide Prevention
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Sara Clow Facebook LinkedIn
Christy: FacebookLinkedIn
Ciara: FacebookLinkedIn
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First H.E.L.P.
In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara discuss First Responder Suicide Awareness Week and the First Responder children. Grab the meatball and start rolling. #Honorthem
The Children
We talk about First Responder Awareness often, not only to help break the stigma of mental health in the first responder world but also to teach tools that can help the survivors of suicide. Suicide is uncomfortable; anyway, you put it. Some people will talk about it, and some will react like it is a dirty little secret. What about these kids? This group of first responders, yes, I said first responders, as they serve with you and continue serving after suicide. It may sound uncomfortable when we say they serve with you on the invisible line at the home front, at school, when they walk down the street. They are either always looking over their shoulder or playing with fire, with reckless behavior. This behavior may sound familiar. You may know a first responder who will take the risk of entering the building without their vest or not caring if they have the oxygen mask secured. Our first responder kids are doing the same thing; we don’t recognize it as a struggle. We spend so much time not feeling or seeing what is in our four walls that we miss their cry for help.
Excuses
We understand that it’s time to stop making excuses and start changing the conversation on mental health among our first responders. So when will we stop making excuses that the children are just teenagers acting out, or they will grow out of it? That time is now before they make a decision that will forever change their life. Have that conversation with them, letting them know it’s okay to struggle with feelings because we made feelings uncomfortable for their entire life. Learn to be uncomfortable in your feelings; they learn from the best, their parent. Kids are brilliant at feeling the energy in the room, but we are brilliant at ignoring it. Teach accountability through actions and support, not through it. It’s easier not to pretend like it isn’t happening. Suck up the emotions, feel them, taste them, hear them, and learn from them. Feelings are like meatballs: they get messy, they roll away, they want to run, or when you eat them, they stick to your ribs. Life with children can get saucy, and it rolls away from you quickly, so you can either get up and get the meatball or miss it as it rolls by.
Mental Health Resources for Kids
Start planning for your child's mental health needs before you need the resources. Learn from them and practice with them. Teach them that vulnerability is a strength. Some schools offer a program that helps you find a counselor. Care Solace works with the school systems to help take the stress of what counselor works best off your shoulders. Take your kids for an internet surf and check out mental health tools like Project Semi-Colon. Find your local NAMI organization.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Care Solace
Project Semicolon
Nami
Christy: FacebookLinkedIn
Ciara: FacebookLinkedIn
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In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Ciara talk with Leslie Maginn, daughter of J. Daniel Maginn EOW 7/9/93.
We had the hard talks with Leslie about how being a child of a police officer who died by suicide has affected her life and the trickle of effects of not dealing with the trauma. Much like how our first responders deal with trauma, Leslie did so too. We had deep talks of her dark places and how she too avoided dealing with the grief, even as a young child.
As a young child she refused to grieve and learned many avoidance behaviors so she didn’t have to face her grief. She dove head first into things that satisfied her and when it didn’t anymore she picked up something else. Or moved. Or just plain quit.
These behaviors followed her into adulthood where then it became things that were not just only unhealthy mentally but physically too. Until she too thought it wasn’t really worth it anymore, and who cares about the future.
The Hardwork
Just as she had thought she was done with everything, a corner turned and she tried counseling. That partnered with facing her grief, owning it, and getting some closure; Leslie came out of her 20+ year long pain and became part of something amazing. She continues to do the hard work at getting healthy and finding herself again.
She along with her co-founder started Foundation 1010. They are striving to help first responders and their families. The ideas Leslie shared with us are quite amazing and definitely can have such a positive impact on the families within their community!
Keep pushing forward Leslie, we are here for you, to listen and watch you and the foundation grow!
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Foundation1010 Fighting For First Responders
Foundation1010 Facebook
Foundation1010 Instagram
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Leslie Maginn FacebookInstagram
Christy: FacebookLinkedIn
Ciara: FacebookLinkedIn
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First H.E.L.P.
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Ciara talk about the family weekend in Dallas Texas.
First H.E.L.P. Family
Every year family members who have lost a first responder to suicide are able to attend a weekend of honoring their loved ones. While seeing the people who have become their family.
We talk about how this year the sessions were mixed among family members, and how awesome the sessions were. We got to learn how other family members dealt with their grief, which is not how it has been in the past: widows all together, parents all together, etc.
This year was a first for both of our daughters and it was truly another part of our families healing journeys, and so awesome to see them be with other children who have lost a parent to suicide.
The family weekend is sometimes the only vacation many of these families get all year, so it is undeniably special in many ways. We are so thankful for First H.E.L.P. and all the amazing sponsors who help put this even together each year. It would never be possible without them!
Already counting down the days to see our family next year!
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
PyschCentral
Child Welfare Gateway
The National Child Traumatic Stress Network
Christy: FacebookLinkedIn
Ciara: FacebookLinkedIn
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First H.E.L.P.
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Ciara talk with Firefighter Pat Shea about his rock bottom and how he has dedicated himself to getting healthy, and how to help others.
Pat, a former Firefighter for Little Rock Arkansas fire department, was injured on the job; from there his life tumbled out of control, to the point of no longer being a fireman and losing everything to addiction. Pat met the demons of addiction, and fought his way back to sobriety, and is now a Firefighter with the Las Vegas Fire Department. While actively speaking about his addiction and struggle in hopes to help others. Not just with his fellow firefighters but on active calls in his community, in his hometown, and proudly on the podcast.
Like many others Pat has seen how crucial it is to be speaking out so our first responders see that it is ok to not be ok. It is ok to ask for help. His life changed the day that one person picked up the phone and he asked for help. It is hard work, but he won’t ever give up; and wants people to know that regardless of being a cop, a firefighter, an EMT, or a dispatcher that you should be supported when asking for help. No matter what your struggle is, there should always be support and someone to help and listen.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
IAFF Center of Excellence - It’s Okay to Ask For Help
1-844-525-3473 Firefighter Suicide Hotline
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Pat Shea FacebookInstagram
Christy: FacebookLinkedIn
Ciara: FacebookLinkedIn
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First H.E.L.P.
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Ciara talk about how actively listening doesn’t just mean listen to others, but also to yourself.
Christy and Ciara chatted this week about active listening, and how actively listening can help not just you but your relationships. How it is healthy to listen to yourself, what you need and what you chose to do for yourself.
Having active conversations is so important for the mental health aspect in all areas of life, including your own self. It is ok to listen to yourself and say “I need to decompress”. Listening to yourself and what you need, will help you actively listen to the people around you, whether it be in the office, at the dinner table or with friends.
Christy talked about her annoyance with hearing people eat, and how it is linked to the fight or flight. We now learned that it has a scientific term as Misophonia. Christy now has a broader perspective on how she can sit down at the dinner table with her family and have an active listening conversation. Ciara will be having a deeper conversation with herself about getting into a better routine and going to bed earlier.
What can you do to listen to yourself better? And how can that active listening to yourself improve your overall life?
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Misophonia
Actively Listening to yourself
Christy: FacebookLinkedIn
Ciara: FacebookLinkedIn
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In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara chat about recognizing the good, in literally just about everything!
You can see the good!
**It is so incredibly healthy and healing in recognizing the good, even in the bad situations. But also recognizing that you can’t look past the bad because of the good.
As Christy finds the good in her ghosts…what can you find the good in? It may have been a “bad day with a bad call”. But if you are learning with your tools in your toolbelt…you’ll find that the good in your life will help you overcome those traumatic events. Finding the good in traumatic events helps your mind and body start the process of recognizing and healing.**
The series “Nightwatch” is based in New Orleans, Louisiana, and how they have a party after a funeral, it is known as “the second line”. They find the good in their loss and celebrate their life with a “Jazz Funeral”, they party and dance. You can find a few clips of their Jazz Funerals here and here.
For all you who are curious about a turkey vulture spiritual meaning…so while Christy sees the good, I’m going to keep a healthy safe distance.
Christy: FacebookLinkedIn
Ciara: FacebookLinkedIn
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In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Ciara talk with a Retired Fire Investigator and Stronger Families Director, Tim Sears.
PTSI
Tim talked about his struggles with PTSI and how he now helps families and first responders build healthy relationships through Stronger Families.
Sears Speaks about how their “wheelhouse” is relationships and helping strengthen those relationships, which goes hand in hand within the communities while creating a space for spouses to connect with other spouses.
Stronger Families
Stronger Families helps guide first responders and their families on how “to end the shift well” and some great tips to help them and their families at home.
Take a cold shower; it is healthy for you. Mentally and physically.
C.A.N.I.
Remember Constant and Never Ending Improvement…we are all constantly evolving, growing, and improving. C.A.N.I., also known as Kaizen, a combination of Japanese traditions, can help us throughout living in a first responder home to process what life throughs at us. C.A.N.I.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Stronger Families
C.A.N.I./Kaizen
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Christy: FacebookLinkedIn
Ciara: FacebookLinkedIn
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First H.E.L.P.
There is conversation that may be to Triggering
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Ciara talk with a family member about the fight to save her family, while trying to get help for her former spouse.
Jody
We are using the name Jody, to protect the family as they are still going through this situation. The strength it takes to speak up and fight to be heard is admirable.
Family
Jody has been trying to get her husband helped for years after PTSD had gotten so bad, that he is now living on the lamb. The unfortunate situation has caused not only the family to break apart, but for her to live looking over her shoulder, wondering where he is.
PTSD
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, can happen to anyone and anytime. However, as compounded trauma continues to pile up, there comes a breaking point. Often when left untreated, causes a person to change and hallucinate, and lose all sight of reality. For a first responder, this becomes job ended when the departments turn a blind eye.
Treatment
Treatment can help heal PTSD. There are many facilities and Doctors that will help first responders heal. Ask your EAP, or your doctor, or talk with your peer support.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
988
Copline
Christy: FacebookLinkedIn
Ciara: FacebookLinkedIn
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First H.E.L.P.
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Ciara talk with retired Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Captain Harry Fagel
They spoke with Harry about his trauma’s and how he has handled them through the years. How he has written poetry as his release and to help him through his hard times. That it is his healthy outlet and how important it is to him, even years later still writing and performing his poetry. They spoke on the poem he wrote and performed after the October 1 mass shooting at the Route 91 Festival in Las Vegas.
How Harry is too, speaking out for the mental health of officers, and how he has had to bury too many friends to suicide. Harry speaks in depth about how therapy and acknowledging “it’s ok to not be ok” has helped him, that it is hard work but well worth all that you put in to do the work. Thank you Harry for sharing your journey and helping to fight the mental health fight within our departments!
Every night out in the Vegas bake
Cop for 25 years out here
Sucking it up
Blowing it out
Keeping it cool
Risking it all
Front seat witness to death in all its inglorious;
Suicide, homicide, abuse, neglect
- Piece from Harry’s poem “Attention Reinvention”
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
The Route- October 1 Tribute by Captain Harry Fagel
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Harry:
FacebookHarry’s Poetry Page
Christy: FacebookLinkedIn
Ciara: FacebookLinkedIn
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First H.E.L.P.
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Ciara talk about the effects of miscommunication and your mental wellness.
They broke down the basis of miscommunication and how it can not just affect your mental health but your life overall. How much your anxiety, depression, PST (D) (I), can be affected by miscommunication, and cause even more anxiety and turmoil. It is an emotional spiral that can be avoided. Have active listening and open conversations.
Miscommunication can come in all forms, not just verbal. How one may act during a conversation can be conceived as miscommunication. It takes work to learn how to have a healthy conversation, and it is even ok to start those healthy conversations with a text or a note, it is a healthy step in the direction to improve the home and relationships.
We all need to be better with communication because “81% of children aged five to thirteen formally diagnosed with emotional and behavior disorders demonstrated below-average language performance” we have taught our children to not communicate. This should be everyone’s challenge for the week!
“To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.” Tony Robbins
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
https://www.growingself.com/how-to-avoid-miscommunication-in-relationships/#:~:text=Miscommunication%20in%20relationships%20is%20more,miscommunication%20is%20bound%20to%20happen.
https://i2linc.com/2022/07/27/poor-communication-skills-mental-health/#:~:text=In%20fact%2C%20mental%20health%20issues,in%20people%20with%20anxiety%20disorders.
https://rarroo.medium.com/four-reasons-poor-communication-makes-anxious-people-more-anxious-7da1ba6bce4d
https://medium.com/@coachpadraig/14-strategies-to-avoid-miscommunication-with-your-team-354d1c761d26
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Christy: FacebookLinkedIn
Ciara: FacebookLinkedIn
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This week Christy and Ciara talk about compassion fatigue in a first responder home. We will take a look at the reasons and ways to overcome burnout.
Compassion Fatigue/ Caregiver Burn-out
At home point in our lifetime, everyone will struggle with Compassion Fatigue/Caregiver Burnout. What causes Caregiver Fatigue? Well, honestly, life is how we take care of ourselves and our families in the process of life. According to the article from BetterUp, lack of control, lack of perceived choice, intensity of hours, perfectionism, financial stress, and low self-confidence are the main reasons.
Christy and Ciara also talked about “closing the tabs” and how that can help not just mentally and physically but improve the household dynamic and overall happiness of everyone. They challenged everyone to move all the apps from their Home Screen on phones and tablets, like the book Make Time: How to Focus on What Matters Every Day, to the next page. These little steps can stop you from mindlessly scrolling through social media and help you better connect to yourself and the people around you.
Here is an excellent article about Compassion Fatigue and ways to help combat it. I love how the first tip is “Ask for help,” what we preach every day! Ask for help because it is ok not to be ok!
Show Links:
BetterUp
Help Guide
Make Time
Compassion Fatigue
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Christy’s FacebookLinkedIn
Ciara’s FacebookLinkedIn
First H.E.L.P.
This week Christy talks with Joette Doyle, a family member of a first responder that served for 36 years in the Fire Department. While serving, he lost his sister, mother, and brother to illness and his daughter to suicide.
Silence Speaks
Joette had known her boyfriend for over 20 years. Although being together for 13 years, she has watched the change in communication and inability to process and ask for help for himself. How do you get through to someone who doesn’t talk about anything? The Guilt of feeling like you are not being able to help those you love while your job is to go and help the community can weigh you down.
Taking the Cape Off
Joette had the opportunity to read a book by Patrick Kenny, a former fireman, called Taking the Cape Off. In the book, Patrick has an open dialogue about what struggles he went through with his family while on the job. Doyle comments everyone looks at first responders as if they are superheroes; even superheroes need to cape off at the end of the day. We are all only human, and your family remains the constant in your life. Don’t they deserve to understand how to help you?
Family Tools
Family, like the first responder, cannot read minds; they can, however, feel the silence and distance that occurs over time. Having the tools/words to help the first responder to open up and for both sides of the family connection to know that what is occurring is not because of the family and silence is what was taught as not to appear weak or struggling. This, however, is a learned behavior that can change.
- Have a friend or person you can talk to; to help you process
- Be prepared to say, hey, I had a bad day, and then reconvene the conversation or sit together in silence as you process.
- Your family understands more than you want to believe.
- Have a hobby
Show Links:
Taking off the Cape
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First H.E.L.P.
This week Christy and Ciara talked about the mental wellness of the family, including children and
friends of 1st Responders. Ending Mental Health Awareness month they touched on all the stressors of
every day life, and how even children can be affected by this.
How everyone can suffer differently through depression, anxiety, grief, trauma, and various other
mental health hurdles we can all go through. Learning how to go through life with healthy coping skills
and how to help your children.
According to studies “1 in 5 adults live with a mental illness, and over 1 in 5 youth (ages 13-18) either
currently or at some point have had a seriously debilitating mental illness.”
The book Ciara talked about “Supercharging the Female Brain” by Daniel G Amen. We found a lot of
men’s mental health books, but nothing specific like the female one. I will do some more research and
give recommendations next week.
Some tips for First Responders to take care of yourself , actually anyone can use these tips when they
feel they are in challenging situations.
As parents we all think we can fix all help all, but sometimes it’s ok to step back and say we need help,
here is what we chatted about a bit.
988 is ALWAYS available for anyone to talk and get help.
COPLINE 1-800-COPLINE
IAFF Hotline 855-900-8437
In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara the meaning of Memorial Day.
Never Forget
We should never forget why we celebrate this holiday, thank you to all our brave men and
women who have given the ultimate sacrifice for our country!
Decoration Day
Christy and Ciara chatted about how Memorial Day was originally celebrated and held by the
slaves after the civil war, it was then called “Decoration Day”. A particular quote about the
article I truly love “This was a story that had really been suppressed both in the local memory
and certainly the national memory,” says Blight. “But nobody who had witnessed it could ever
have forgotten it.” That is a quote that is s true on many levels when it comes to the remembrance
of our soldiers that have given their all, then and now. To read about this history, click here! Even
more history here!
Memorial Day Quotes
Our nation owes a debt to its fallen heroes that we can never fully repay. - Barak
Obama
As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to
utter words but to live by them. - John F Kennedy
No duty is more urgent than that of returning thanks. - James Allen
It is foolish and wrong to mourn the men who died. Rather, we should thank God that
such men lived. - George S Patton
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
1st HELP The Number
The Forgotten Black History
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First H.E.L.P.
In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara discuss communication after suicide and the elephant it causes in relationships.
Welcome aboard
Ciara Madrid, one of our many volunteers, has now taken the role of co-host on Beyond the 1st Response. I am excited to have her knowledge, and determination, to break the stigma of mental wellness in first responders and their families.
The Misunderstanding of tip-toeing around Suicide
It will also feel uncomfortable to talk about someone dying by suicide because truth be known, we don’t have the words to after someone losses a loved one by suicide. Statistics are 1 in 4 young people considered suicide. That means, that our first responder children that have a parent die by suicide, are in fact 3 times more likely to take their lives.
Communication
Starting a relationship is tough, to begin with, add losing a partner to suicide. Communication tends to be difficult. The trauma that someone deals with is like no other. Learning a new set of communication skills can remove the elephant in the room. “It is much easier to talk about suicide than it is to bury someone you love to suicide.” Ciara Madrid
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
John Hopkins Medicine
People Magazine
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LinkedInLinkedIn
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First H.E.L.P.
In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara talk with Doug Lowe founder of EMMP about his new venture to fuel Firefighters while they fight forest fires in the Pacific Northeast.
For The Love of Cooking
Doug has taken his passion for restaurants and cooking to an all-new level; fueling those that are fighting wildfires. For the past 20-plus years, he has done everything from busboy, to chef and back again. The desire to keep the conversations going that we often have while at the dinner table or in the kitchen, Doug’s passion is to bring it to those that can’t get home to their own tables.
EMMP
EMMP was born in 2020, when Doug watched through his life those firefighters and the victims of the fires, struggle in the moments of disaster. Giving back to them was in his heart, and fueling them with food was the one way he knew how. Spending countless dollars of his own to buy the equipment needed, followed up with making sure the health department would provide him the property permits, so it is done right; it is finally here.
Wildland Firefighting Season
The season of wildland firefighting is among us, and it is just a matter of the temperature heating up and the ground drying out, and they will be back at it. Wildfire suppression becomes more dangerous every year as mother nature continues to fight back against climate change. The fire season is lasting longer, and first responders are in the throat of it for a longer rate of time. Not only draining themselves physically but mentally as well. Bringing a hot meal, and fresh coffee is just the start of what EMMP has planned. They may not be able to make it home, but they will have a table and meal for one of the days they are there. One Kind Act will nourish the souls that put their lives on the line each and every day.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
EMMP
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First H.EL.P.
In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy talks with Sgt. Dwayne English of Joliet Police Department IL, about how being a cop has made him a better counselor.
Dream Cop
Since the age of six, Dwayne had wanted to become a cop. Living his dream, he saw the stress of being a first responder both in the community and at home. Achieving a bachelors in psychology, he has worked hard to bring mental wellness into the department on all levels.
Blue H.E.L.P.
Discovering the social media presence of Blue H.E.L.P. and the conversations they were starting online. Dwayne reached out and asked how he can help. Dwayne and his son Cole, for years helped put together the honor boxes for the police departments that lost an officer to suicide. Reaching out a liaison to the departments to let them know, they are not alone.
Masters Degree
Retirement is not something that is easy on the mind, especially when you have gifts and lessons, that you can share and help others. Dwayne has spent the last three years in school, while still working on the job, to become a licensed counselor. Now, nearing the end, of school, he doing his internship and seeing patients at Aspyre Wellness.
Plan for Retirement
Dreaming of doing nothing but fishing, biking, or just sitting on your couch doing nothing, sounds amazing. In reality, you spend 25 plus years on the job constantly caring for your communities, your families, etc. But you have to have a plan. Dwayne, is planning to conitune to help others, with the gift of Therapy. What is your plan?
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Joliet Police Department
Asypre Wellness
First H.EL.P.
In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy talks with Chris about starting 4th Shift Fitness in 2017 with the goal of bringing these lessons directly to the front lines. Go to 4thShiftFitness.com to see how to get in touch and set up a seminar, training session, or digital personal training.
Tailboard Talks Podcast
Chris started his podcast Tailboard Talks Podcast, after recording videos on YouTube talking about mental health, fitness, and firefighting. Bringing tools for balancing them all in a healthy way.
1st Responders Conferences
On May 15-16th 1st Responder Conferences, Chris will be speaking on his 4th Shift Fitness coaching. Spouses and Partners are welcome to attend the two-day conference mental wellness conference for first responders and families.
4th Shift Fitness
Understanding that every firehouse, police department, and civilian world, is affected by making time for health and fitness. Chris realizes they can bring it to you where ever you are. 4th Shift Fitness, offers ways to achieve the goal that you are looking for. They are also willing to come to your department, home, gym, and provide the coaching that we all can use.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Tailboard Talks Podcast
4th Shift Fitness
Follow Our Guest:
4th shift fitness https://www.instagram.com/4thshiftfitness/
https://www.instagram.com/spring4change/
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First H.E.L.P.
In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Steve talk with Valerie Groth, Director of Partnerships at Stella Center. Part 2 of the Stellate Ganglion Block (SGB)
SGB- What is different now
Christy decided to have the SGB after struggling with PTSD for over 30 years. The results have been amazing. After the first episode on the SGB, and researching it, she was ready to take the leap.
Therapy
Continuing the regimen of Talk Therapy, or counseling of your choice, is important. The SGB is not a miracle fix. It is, however, an important tool, to help move you past the traumatic events that you have been through. People that do couple therapy and the SGB are more likely, to not have to have a follow-up treatment.
Stella Center
At Stella Center, Dr. Lipov has discovered the use of anesthesia to help reset your fight or flight response. Effectively providing relief almost immediately. Valerie is working on partnering with not only VA hospitals but also with First Responders and their families. Currently, insurance doe not cover the treatment, but some partnerships that Stella Center has can assist.
Advocating for Stellate Ganglion
Chicago Police department is recognizing the need for mental health needs in the department. A City Council committee has been formed to review how SGB can be accepted and covered for the police force, their family, and all city workers. You find the speaking engagement on the resource tab of Stella Center’s website.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Resource Center
Stella Center
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Valerie Groth
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First H.E.L.P.
In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy talks with Wendy Hummel Podcast Host of Guns and Yoga. Wendy, a wellness coordinator for Sedwick County Sheriff Department in Kansas, brings her first responder yoga to the wellness program she has built. Grab your tool bag, we are handing you some new tools for living a resilient life.
Yoga
Wendy has been doing yoga for 15 years. After realizing the benefits it has had on her, during the stress of their job and personal life, she became a certified trainer with Yoga for First Responders.
We are not a Super Hero
Tools during yoga can help you normalize, and prepare for the stress of life. You don’t have to be good at integrating work-life balance. Doing yoga helps to build your resilience. It helps build your physical stress, your body moves as if you are wringing out the stress out while being mindful.
Self Management
Breathwork is the direct line to your access to your nervous system. When you inhale your active sympathetic response; when you exhale your parasymapthic branch. Hummell states this has been the most beneficial teaching for first responders. Your body doesn’t recognize an actual threat or perceived threat.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Guns and Yoga Podcast
Radical Resilience Program
Yoga for First Responders
Follow Our Guest:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4slYZAdpQOxrbbew6WwzLA
https://www.facebook.com/people/Guns-and-Yoga/100064269423315/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/wendy-hummell-b48653186/
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First H.E.L.P.
In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy talks with Jillian Bass, a radio host for Star 96.7 Fm. Jillian experienced an event that opened her up to understand that mental wellness is a top priority and has created a platform on her midday show for all her listeners.
Porta Potty
After a night baseball game at the local community park, life changed instantly. “Hide behind the porta potty, get down, get down!” Bass remembers screaming. Plainfield, Illinois the typical American suburban community, it happened. Leaving the fields after the game, they stepped foot on the parking lot where shots rang out. At first, not realizing what was happening, they realized, there was a gunfight in the parking full of children and families. Once in the car, they realized that a male victim lay deceased next to his car.
PTSD and Therapy
Silently suffering for months, Jillian realized it needed to change. It wasn’t normal to isolate herself anymore. Months after, she began to go to therapy. Processing not only what she experienced but was provided tools, to help her when the triggers come around. Resiliency can happen every day.
Mental Wellness
Imagine, listening to something positive every day! The importance of making the conversation normal and finding a positive even through a negative event is life-changing. Hitting the airways with Mind health Mondays and a feel-good story every day is helping someone, somewhere, each day.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Star 96.7 FM
96.7 Book Club
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Jillian Bass
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First H.E.L.P.
EP 35: Becca Willey- While you are away..
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy talks with Becca Willey, an army wife, mother of three, business owner, and board member of Naperville Salute, and organizations, that celebrate Veterans and First Responses raising money to give back to the veterans in the Chicagoland area.
18 Month Countdown
Becca has been through this drill before, deployment, time apart, and back together. This time, deployment comes, 18 months long, and now three kids are at home. Just when you think you are ready, it hits, she was not as mentally prepared as she thought. Navigating new waters, with three other bodies, but she is not alone.
Buddy Check
Buddy Check, how are you? “ Drowning but ok!” I pick up the phone and call, “ it’s not ok to be drowning.” We proceed to talk openly, this wouldn’t happen if buddy checks weren’t in place.
Grieving the loss of who he was
When a first responder leaves for a shift, whether it be 12 hours, 48 hours, or 18 months, they come home a different person. Life circumstance changes every time you walk back into your front door and when you leave. There is a feeling that seems impossible to describe because you haven’t lost someone, they are coming home, however, it feels isolating. It’s called grief, you are grieving the person you knew, who you love, and who you will miss. Grieving, yes, because they are changing while they are gone. They don’t know what call, event, or discussion they have to make will change them, or even if they will realize it has changed them. You are grieving the loss of who you were as well. Don’t forget that, family is your biggest support system, and they are serving next to you from the home front.
When is the right time?
There is no right answer to knowing when the right time to tell family you are leaving. Or even if they would understand the length of time. Finding that tool earlier can help you and your family. Let the kids talk openly, and let them see your emotions. They will know it’s ok to let the tears fall, it’s ok to be angry at that moment. Because that is Processing in a healthy way. Sometimes, that is all you need is someone to sit with no judgment.
No Judgement
Give yourself grace, don’t judge yourself for feeling overwhelmed, confused, or angry. Forgive yourself, it’s ok to sit here taking in the new normal, the unknown, that is processing. Remember not to stay there, find yourself, You Be You, so that you can be there for yourself.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Naperville Salute
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https://www.instagram.com/mamawilley/
https://www.instagram.com/uh60rotorhead/
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In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy talks with Jennifer Anderson of First Responder Coaching candidly about her WHY in understanding the need for coaching as an option for preparing for what the job does to you and your family.
How We Met
Jennifer and Kevin met in college, she was attending for an education degree. He was going for his criminal justice degree, they fell in love, got married, and life began. The local police department hired Kevin, and one of the first things the Chief did was call and interview Jennifer. The Chief wanted to make sure she understood the toll of the job. Fast forward 10 years, two children, and many days on the job later. Kevin started changing.
Mental Break
Anderson saw things changing, but couldn’t understand what it was. Kevin became distant, separating himself emotionally, except for being a father. Finally, it happened, Kevin needed help. After 15 years as a police officer, countless overtime, traumatic calls, and no support from the department, he could no longer stay on duty and retired out medically.
First Responder Coaching
A traumatic life-changing event turned passion and understanding. An eagerness to coach first responders and their families, to help prepare for what life as a first responder can throw at you. FRC savings marriage's lives and provides support and tools to balance lifes ups and downs.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
First Responder Coaching
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Linkdin
Instragram
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In this episode of Beyond the First Response, Christy and Robyn talk with Firefighter Jason Patton of Fire Department Chronicles and Fire Department Coffee.
Jason
17 year veteran FF Jason Patton uses his personal struggles with mental health as motivation for his often ‘art imitating life’ take on firefighting in the wildly popular “Fire Department Chronicles” videos. Whether you are a first responder or a civilian surfing You Tube, you will no doubt find yourself smiling and laughing.
Seriously, Who Does This?
Sometimes during a call, you look at the situation and think seriously, who does this? For many first responders this happens all the time and Jason has found the best way to not let this view of humanity get to him is just to laugh. As many firefighters have free time on their hands during their off days, Jason and friends have also embarked on a successful venture as coffeemakers and distributers. Fire Department Coffee can now be found in big box supermarkets such as Albertsons and Safeway. This stuff isn’t for the faint of heart though! This is the caffeine dosage of someone who needs to stay awake for 48 hours!!!
First H.E.L.P.
Fire Department Chronicles
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Robyn talk with Molly Jones; Clinical Educations Coordinator, and Hannah Elmore, MSW of Advanced Recovery Systems (ASR) on the recovery programs for first responders.
IAFF Center of Excellence
ASR, in partnership with IAFF, opened the IAFF Center of Excellence facilities for active and retired firefighters struggling with mental health. While the facilities specialize in PTSD for professional fire service members who struggle with trauma, substance use, addiction and other related behavioral health challenges, treatment will vary depending on the severity of the symptoms that the first responder is presenting.
First Responder Fortitude Program
The Fortitude program is ASR's newest program that allows first responders, regardless of the uniform they put on, to seek help along with other first responders. This also includes non-union/volunteer firefighters.
Welcome Home
Transitioning after discharge for treatment is as important as the treatment itself. Family outreach assures that they are prepared when the first responder comes home. The department plays a huge role in the success of a firefighters return to work. One of the most valuable ways they can help make this more comfortable for the entire crew is to set up a peer support point person. Having those buddy checks will foster continued healing in the real-world. Once we understand we are not alone, we start to see that we have support. Providing the tools for the family on both sides of the job will help to normalize mental wellness.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
IAFF Center for Exellence
First Responder Fortitude Program
Advanced Recovery Systems
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Molly Jones, Clinical Education Coordinator at Advanced Recovery Specialist LLCHannah Elmore, Outreach Coordinator at IAFF Center of Excellence
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First H.E.L.P.
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Robyn talk to Valerie Groth, MSW, MA Director of Partnerships at Stella Center and Alameda County Fire Department Captain Jess Anderson about Stellate Ganglion Block injections.
SGB
SGB is an injection of local anesthetic into the stellate ganglion, a nerve bundle in the neck connected to the fight or flight response system, to help people feel calm again in their bodies. Stella’s definition
What is Has Done for Me
After years of working with a therapist to overcome PTSD, Jess learned about the SGB injection. He speaks candidly about the significate difference in how his body and mind react to every day stimuli. Before the injections, he was always in hypervigilance mode, where even the time off of work had the enjoyment sucked out of him. After the injection, he instantly felt a difference. Jess continues to take steps to live a healthy life with peer support, counseling and exercising. SGB has an 83% one-treatment rate, with only 10% returning for a second treatment, but it should be considered to assist the healing process for trauma.
Treatment
SGB, has been around for a long time in the pain management world. Epidurals are an example of their use. Although FDA-approved in the pain management world, it has yet to be FDA-approved for helping reset your stellate ganglion nerve bundle. Advances have been made with veterans and the use of this treatment so Val is hopeful that though currently, medical insurance does not cover treatment for first responders and their families, that may change in the near future. For information on the first responder program, contact Valerie directly at valerie@stellacenter.com
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Stella Center
Stella definition of SGB
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Beyond the 1st Response
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Robyn talk to Calvin Parie, DR, PH, LMFT, CEAP, who oversees a profile for EAP Centura Health.
The Myth About EAP’S
Why did you call the EAP? Now HR is going to know that you are struggling. This is often a misconception for many, especially in the first responder world. The truth is, HR doesn’t have access to who uses the EAP, just the number of people that do. Who is privy to information you may have contacted EAP is up to you.
Vetting the EAP
This can feel a little overwhelming, especially when in crisis, so start now before you need it. Understanding the program that your department has is vital to add the tools to your duty bag. Most EAPs now have different options to contact; in person, through telehealth, over the phone, or by text. According to Calvin, Centura Health has partnered with BetterHelp to increase the reach of employees' comfort levels. Whether you are calling because of marriage issues, financial issues, or work-related stressors, make sure to ask for a licensed therapist that is knowledgeable on the first responder mindset.
LERF
For whoever you confide in, one trait they should have is the ability to Listen with Empathy, Respond, and Follow up. Another trait is if they are not professional, it’s ok, they don’t need to try and fix the issue; they just need to listen for curiosity, not listen to fix. Often, just talking to someone you trust, will help you through.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Centura Health
BetterHelp
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First H.E.L.P.
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy talks with Mike Marotta, the First H.E.L.P. Training Coordinator. Mike is a former San Antonio Police Officer.
20 Months 8 Suicides.
After six officers died by suicide in the past six months, with eight officers in 20 months, the problem could not be dismissed anymore. Fox 29 News in San Antonio helps to give a voice to officers and their families. The Public Safety Advisory Board called a meeting and questioned what the mental health protocol is for the police and fire departments. First H.E.L.P.’s tracking of first responder suicides is helping to show change is needed.
What Next
According to Mike, this is the start of a change that will occur sooner than later. The Public Safety Advisory Board has plans to reconvene after allowing the Fire and Police Departments to put a strategic plan in place.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Fox 29 News
First H.E.L.P.
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First H.E.L.P.
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Robyn talk to Robert Swideraski, a son of a Chicago Police officer. He has started Running for Blue Lives after seeing the effects of living in a first responder home firsthand.
22 Districts
The mental health of officers matters, and they need to know.
Too Many Hats
Police Officers are expected to multitask many jobs
- Medic
- Social worker
- Psychiatrist
- Marriage counselor
- Traffic Specialist
Abraham Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs
Abraham Maslow, only 1% of people, will reach self actualizations. Interestingly enough, basic needs are at the bottom, and safety needs are next. Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs lays out why police officers struggle with belonging and loving needs because they find it hard to find the safety needs being met due to the stressors of the job and lack of support from the community. Trust is a big issue for first responders because of what they see daily. Family doesn’t always understand because it is not being communicated to them. Lack of transparency with the significant others can change, but having a simple conversation.
S.A.L.L.I.D- Six Things that Frustrate your most Productive Employee
- Self-serving agenda
- Acceptance of mediocrity
- Lack of transparency
- Lack of communication
- Indecisive
- Disorganization
Public Safety Officer Act 2022
What does this mean for families that have lost first responders to suicide? Anyone that has not a family member to suicide from January 1, 2019, and later will be able to get restoration with certain steps that will need to be taken.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Public Safety Officer Act 2022
Calumet College
Augustine Wellness Center
Everyday Warriors Podcast
Abraham Manslow’s Hierarchy of Needs
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First H.E.L.P.
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Robyn talk to Danny McGuire Jr, former Chicago police Sgt, now a professor at Calumet College and intern therapist at Augustine Wellness Center, and podcast host of Everyday Warriors.
Support
Danny wants to talk to you when you are in trouble. Regardless of what it is. Understanding that this is just a moment in time. Support is everything; working through the emotions with someone who is there to listen is important. McGuire can accomplish this at Augustine Wellness Center
Too Many Hats
Police Officers are expected to multitask many jobs
- Medic
- Social worker
- Psychiatrist
- Marriage counselor
- Traffic Specialist
Abraham Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs
Abraham Maslow, only 1% of people will reach self actualizations. Interestingly enough, basic needs are at the bottom, and safety needs are next. Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs lays out why police officers struggle with belonging and loving needs because they find it hard to find the safety needs being met due to the stressors of the job and lack of support from the community. Trust is a big issue for first responders because of what they see daily. Family doesn’t always understand because it is not being communicated to them. Lack of transparency with the significant others can change, but having a simple conversation.
S.A.L.L.I.D- Six Things that Frustrate your most Productive Employee
- Self-serving agenda
- Acceptance of mediocrity
- Lack of transparency
- Lack of communication
- Indecisive
- Disorganization
Public Safety Officer Act 2022
What does this mean for families that have lost first responders to suicide? Anyone that has not a family member to suicide from January 1, 2019, and later will be able to get restoration with certain steps that will need to be taken.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Public Safety Officer Act 2022
Calumet College
Augustine Wellness Center
Everyday Warriors Podcast
Abraham Manslow’s Hierarchy of Needs
1stHelp.org/podcast
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response Christy and Robyn talk to Debbie Green, a retired Public Safety Dispatcher 2 who wants to let everyone know the time has come to not stay quiet about mental health.
The Headset
Debbie admits that she would often picture the scene much worse than it was. Dispatchers don't deal with just one call, they could be listening to up to 100 calls a day, rarely having the peace of mind knowing the outcome. The industry still does not recognize the amount of training it takes to prepare for a dispatching career.
Information Processing
Each call has two dispatchers assigned. The "Call Taker" is speaking with the caller and the "Radio People" are relaying pertinent information to the police or fire. Most everything is communicated via text making it even more difficult to assure they are processing the information needed for the call. It's a legal document so you have to remove your emotion to get through the call. Talk about stress….
During the time of "suck it up and move on" no tools we offered to help their mental state after a call. Debbie goes on to share an example; after an officer was shot, her attempts to relieve the dispatchers on the call allowing them to take a break and walk away were met with an emphatic no and to make matters worse, the dispatchers were back at the job the next day. Debbie's only way to cope was to simply sit back, take a deep breath, and move onto the next call. “That is not processing, that is removing the emotion.”
Peer Support Now
According to Debbie, peer support has come a long way than when her department first implemented the team in 2015. Back then, they called the debriefing a kumbaya and even that was days later. Dispatchers would have to request peer support resources, it wasn't automatically offered and definitely frowned upon to accept.
Quiet No More
Debbie's breaking point was in 2019 when she dispatched a call on which one of her officers was shot and killed. The events that followed are what prompted her to take the motto of being quiet no more. Now an outspoken advocate for first responder mental health she makes sure to focus on dispatchers, the often forgotten ones.
What Should we do Different?
- Give dispatchers the tools to properly process the emotions that come with the calls
- Find a therapist in your area. Check out 1st Help Resources
- Create a routine to help you decompress before and after a call
- Implement a wellness program within the department
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
First H.E.L.P. Resources
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1sthelp.org/podcast
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Robyn talk to Tracy Vitalo-Harwell CPH-T, from Inspired Change Hypnosis and coaching about how hypnosis can “shift that space” and how it helps first responders.
What Happened To You When You Were A Child?
It doesn’t start when you become a first responder. That changes you, yes. The true question is, what happened to you when you were a child? The root of most struggles is what happened earlier in life. We become angry, and start holding on to the hurt, disappointment, and failure as if it’s the last life jacket. Sit here for a minute… it’s not what you do wrong. Now, breathe… life happens to us, we are just along for the ride.
Here’s A Tissue
Tracy explains that those of us who are Generation X and older were taught to suck it up, not talk about it, and hide it under a rug. Then, just brush the dirt off and move on. Is this why we don’t open up about feelings? The word feeling is an emotional state or reaction. There are 135 words to describe feelings, yet we only use a few of them and they are usually the society-accepting words we think we are feeling in the heat of the moment. So here is a tissue, use it when you are ready.
The Body Keeps Score
Changing the mindset is hard. The good news is that we can be taught the tools to do it ourselves. Let’s face it, if we don’t start changing our mindset it will be our body that does it for us. The body keeps a tally of the years you have self-sabotaged yourself. So if things don’t change the dis - ease in the body will cause your disease.
Healing of the Internal Space
Hypnosis is taught to you via someone guiding you. However, you are the one running the show. It’s up to you whether you are ready to deal with the wounds of the past and present. 90% of your emotional mind is done self- consciously, which leaves only 10% for someone else to help you.
We Are People Who Like To Hold Onto Self-Judgment
We as humans have this superpower of holding onto things that we should have let go of a long time ago. The internal judge or bully doesn’t let you forget this stuff. It waits until you are in dis-ease and then bam hits you over the head. The tool that Tracy Vitalo-Harwell and other hypnosis therapists and coaches give us is learning to take that inner peace back. Even if we don’t think we have it, it’s there waiting inside.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Inspired Change Hypnosis and Coaching
Feelings Wheel
135 Words That Express Emotion
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Robyn talk with Ashlee Gethner LCSW, a first responder daughter who has a private practice, Calming Waves Therapy.
First, I am a First Responder Daughter
Ashlee is currently working on her doctrine, focusing on first responders and their families. As a child of a now-retired police officer, she can see both sides of the badge and the struggles that occur. She carries pride and honor with her knowing the difference first responders make and understanding the toll it takes on the responder and their families. Not only does she work with first responders in a private setting, she also is contracted to go out during critical incident calls with the Kenosha Police department, Kenosha County, and surrounding cities.
Dissertation- Impact of Civil Unrest in Law
Enforcement
- Social work
- Law enforcement focus
- Research of the impact on law enforcement and civil unrest
- What does it look like through the eyes of law enforcement
What Motivates Me
I was listening to the first responder's stories on what the environment is doing to their mental well-being. Ashlee is recognizing that there are more first responders struggling.
First Responder Kids
Social media is fueling the confusion about who and what their parent does for a living. Kids hear little bits and pieces of what other people say about police officers. This has caused them to question the morals and ethics of their parent. It’s not that they are embarrassed about what their parent does; they are scared. As a child of a first responder, Ashlee wishes she would have known when her Dad had terrible days at work.
What can we do to change that mindset:
- Have a conversation about what they do at work
- Giving them tools to know it’s ok to open up and talk
- Make it a safe place to have conversations about what others are saying
- Never be afraid to talk with your children, no matter how bad the event.
KYPCIS- Kentucky Post Critical Incident Seminar
Ashlee participates as a therapist in this three-day seminar. During the three days, they participate in both large and small group events and see a therapist one-on-one. They come out understanding that they are not alone, which helps open the conversation to change for them. KYPCIS, is sponsored by Kentucky’s Department of Criminal Justice. Officers like Officer #2 tell their stories of why they got here to how they can now see the other side.
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Robyn talk with Jim Marshall, CEO of 911 Training Institute.
Just Jump Right In
Jim Marshall has a fantastic insight into what is happening inside our heads. With a Masters in Psychology and years of counseling couples under his belt, he began to focus on dispatcher wellness along with his sister Deborah, a retired dispatcher. Together they identified a training gap on how to keep themselves grounded after the 911 calls pile up.
Word To The Wise
- Humans are a special breed and are designed to avoid emotional pain, NOT just physical pain
- PTSD is treatable and you can heal from it
- You don’t know what you don’t know
- You don’t have to limp along fighting through PTSD
- You did the best you could with what you learned at the time
- Resolution of trauma doesn’t mean you won’t have a return of trauma. It does mean you will feel it through your body as you release it.
Life Changing
Through tragedy, we often learn who we are and what we are capable of doing. Talking about what we have been through is a gift to our first responders and their families. Inviting people to open up to their family in a way that sets boundaries yet helps you process the events of the day is life-changing.
Who Are Your Go-To’s
- Understand that they will not always come to you and open up about everything
- Have a system in place to know when they walk through the door. Example: How was your day 1-10?
- Don’t want to talk to me; let’s take a walk, but I am holding your hand.
- If not me, then who? Tell your partner at home the list of people you are willing to go to and talk about it.
Beyond The 1st Response Show Links:
911 Training Institute
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Robyn talk with retired Shawn and Jeff Thomas of 1st Responder Conferences on the WHY of 1st Responder Conferences
I Don’t Care What People Think
Jeff and Shawn are both retired from King County Sheriff’s department. As the years on the job, began to take a toll. Jeff came from the culture growing up that drinking is what you do. Over time, he realized that his drinking became perpetuated by decisions being made in the department. Realizing he couldn’t continue down this path, Shawn and Jeff searched for help. Quickly realizing, they had no idea where they could turn.
1st Responder Conferences
1st Responder Conferences was born. Understanding that families and struggles vary, with so many different levels of things that can’t be tossed into the ring of black and white solutions. What stood out is first responders needed resources and came together as a first responders family and understood that they were not alone. 1st Responder Conferences bring together health and wellness training for everyday heroes. Bringing together first responders and their families in one room for two training days and testimonies. The first conference had 150 in attendance, the need was there to continue doing conferences. Since the first conference, there have been 30 conferences. Shawn started 1st Responders Conferences while working full-time at the Sheriff’s department. Now that she is retired, she began working alongside First H.E.L.P.
Karen Solomon
Shawn met Karen and discovered the mission of Blue H.E.L.P., which is now under the umbrella of First H.E.L.P.. First H.E.L.P partners with 1st Responder Conferences to provide speakers, booths, etc. Shawn has also become part of the First H.E.L.P. by bringing her expertise to assist as a volunteer for our family programs.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
1st Responder Conferences
Blue H.E.L.P.
First H.E.L.P.
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Robyn talk with retired Police Sargeant/Firefighter-Paramedic Jim Schlicher current training instructor for Calibre Press on what it is like to experience death on the job and off the job.
Don’t Be Afraid Of Death
As First Responders, we deal with death, weekly on the job. Often not even blinking an eye, it’s part of the job that becomes a normal occurrence. Death is a part of life, but normalizing it as just another day at work should not be. Schlicher adds: The one thing we know is death, but we often don’t know how to process it. We are afraid of it, so we don’t process it. American Culture has fallen away from any spirituality and now we don’t know where to go when we need to process a normalized traumatic event.
You Gotta Buy All In
Reflecting on failures in life as a parent, spouse/significant other, child, sibling, and coworker, the one constant that is missing is Living by your words. The belief system can’t be solely on you, let go of that fear of what others think, and open up if you are not confident in the subject. We need to start taking care of others. Whether you are talking to a complete stranger or someone you know, starting a conversation, you are going to learn something new, or even help someone you didn’t know needed it. Something changes inside a person when you start talking to them, they start opening up and this is an opportunity to help people be in a better spot in their heads and hearts. Starting over and learning again to be all in, can feel daunting, but we are made to communicate, and revisit how we talk to people. The Art of Conversation is simple.
Don’t Forget Your Friends and Family
Finding Christ again for Jim has been truly what helped ground him and get him back on track. It’s not an easy road, especially after trauma, and trauma that occurs personally. Schlicher was in an officer-involved shooting in 2012, in which he received a medal of valor from The Hundred Club of Dupage. Each thing you learn after a trauma helps you grow in some ways. One thing to remember, your friend and family are there with you and by your side. Don’t forget them, they are part of the healing process.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Calibre Press
Instructor for Calibre Press
Art of Conversation, by frontier for young minds
The Hundred Club of Dupage
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Linkden
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In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Robyn talk with Dispatcher and First H.E.L.P. volunteer about being a first responder child and becoming a first responde herself.
North Hollywood Shootout
February 28th, 1997 became a day that changed many lives. Crystal was only 5 years old in when the infamous North Hollywood shootout occurred. On scene was her father Sgt. Israel Sonny Medina was an 18yr veteran of the Los Angeles Police Department. Sgt. Israel Sonny Medina was the Sergeant on shift on this day. Ultimately, having to make a decision no one was prepared for, and without the proper equipment. Officers were forced to go into local gun dealers and grab whatever they could to protect the community and themselves. This didn’t come without backlash, after the events that day many officers were part of a lawsuit. On the day that Crystal’s father was scheduled to testify in federal court, he didn’t show and a wellbeing check was done. Once they gained entry he was found deceased of a self-inflicted gunshot wound. The traumatic event alone didn’t cause Sgt. Israel Sonny Medina to take his life, but this was one of many that had piled up over the years. Following the North Hollywood shootout, Crystal can proudly state that her father was part of a policy change protecting officers by providing them the ability to carry semi-automatic weapons in their vehicles.
First Responder Child
Being a first responder child, you often don’t know what your parent deals with every day at work and sometimes off shift. Street states her father like most first responders lived a life at work, and at home, he was at home. Though as a police officer this is something that was difficult at times, as he was involved in a shooting while off duty at a shopping mall. This is one of the meaningful reminders that your job doesn’t end when the shift is over. As a child, you know what your parent does as a job but when your parent tries to leave the job at work but the job doesn’t leave them it becomes very difficult to communicate. Although Crystal was only five years old at the time, she reflects back that she wished he would have talked more so that she and her siblings would have been able to understand, and they would have understood.
What I Learned That Helps My Family Now
Crystal dreamed of following in her Dad’s footsteps as a police officer, but after getting injured at the academy she now serves as a dispatcher in Texas. She followed the steps of many first responders that sat in the aftermath of bad calls, finding herself drinking, and medicating to sleep. What changed for her, is she realized that she wanted to start having children and started back into therapy instead of turning to bottle therapy. Now that she has children, she has made it a priority to help them process when Mom comes home after a critical incident. What tools do you, or can you give your family to help them and help you? Allow your first responder to decompress, and explain to the kids, spouse, or significant other that you need some time after the shift to yourself. Explain that you had a hard day because of a bad call. They already know that you can’t release exact information about the call or scene, but they just want to know what is affecting you and how they can be there for you. Processing doesn’t always have to be a conversation, but time with your family after you decompress, and quickly it was a hard day but I am so happy to be here with you, let’s go do something fun together.
Making Change is ToughYou don’t have to be just starting out as a first responder to benefit from tools to help you and your family. We know that change is tough, but it happens all the time. We suggest
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Robyn discuss with Bob Barc, a Firefighter, who has a passion for peer support and clearing the mental Rolodex
The Rolodex
Bob started his firefighting career in a small town. The lessons started there, along with many experiences that developed his understanding of clearing the mental Rolodex. The Brain is much like a Rolodex, it pushes things back, so it gets lost among other events in life that push the old farther back. Barc makes a point to remind us that we have to push it forward to clear it out.
Family Rolodex
What can we do to help our family understand the replay of the events? Add a card to the family's Rolodex explaining that when there is a difficult call or calls start adding up, we can get stuck in that time, making it difficult for us to talk about what we saw. If family has that card to pull out when we come home a little different, this will help us all.
Stranger Therapy
There is something to be said at times when it feels like we want to fix something or someone and can’t to talk with a stranger. Barc talks about times when you can have a conversation in the back of the ambo, letting that person know that you are there to listen and help them understand this is just a moment in time. Being able to remove any preconceived notions of personally knowing the person. When that person moves on the next step in that moment, they hopefully have some of the stress removed, because the conversation has helped them process what has happened.
The Dinner Table
In a firehouse, everything is fixed at the table. Although, many things go unsaid that need to be released. Whether it is a call that just occurred or a build of struggles in someone's life. The dinner table is a place of no judgement and freedom to be open to the process. Regardless of where that dinner table sits, add it to the Rolodex on a card for you and your family. Pull that card as often as you can, so it keeps in the front of all the cards that are added during our life.
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In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Robyn discuss with Mike Jones Police Officer, and Badge Brew Roaster the importance of finding grace in yourself, through proper processing and leadership.
Profiling The Coffee
At 22 years old and on the night shift, Mike would drink the 24-hour market coffee. Finding himself, adding more and more flavors, and sweeteners, just to get the coffee down. After starting at the Evanston police department, he started going into a local coffee house, where the owner began lining up a coffee taste test. Each time he would go into the shop, he would learn more about the process of blends, flavors, and the importance of roasting the coffee bean. Jones began to consider learning how to roast coffee beans. The process of roasting has become his way to slow down, calm down, and realize the day.
North Central College
Mike, began to go to North Central College, where the school has one of the three coffee roasting programs in the country. He has helped put on seminars for the students, along with getting to use the school's roaster to help roast his beans.
Conversation Over Coffee Is A Morale Booster
Mood can affect the roast. If you bring the stress of the day into the roasting machine, the beans can become bitter, and not have the bold rich taste that is intended. Imagine, taking a moment, slowing your breath, calming your soul, and balancing your mind before you begin to make that coffee. Old beans that are forgotten in the roaster become mixed with the new layer of beans causing it to become difficult to get rid of the forgotten beans. Over time, not processing the events of your day, begin to fill up and mix together. Eventually the bitterness of your job, stress, family, and life begin to take over. Badge Brew has created a coffee that first responders can be proud of. Sitting around having a conversation as you sip the rich, warm, blend of coffee is a morale booster.
Asking For Help
When you reach the point of asking for help, it is already too late in the game according to Mike. As many first responders and their families know, the job becomes so demanding, that hobbies become non-existent.
Roasting Good Leaders
In today’s first responder world some leaders find it hard to think outside the coffee bean. If it has worked for the past 30 years, then why change it. This thinking has caused Evanston PD to think differently, starting from the bottom up. Leaders aren’t made, they are born and raised. As the younger officers sign on as police officers, the process of teaching them to lead begins, one bean at a time.
First Response Coffee
Badge Brew has created a coffee just for First H.E.L.P. every bag sold 10% of the proceeds are donated back to First H.E.L.P. find your badge of honor online today. Check out First Response in the Collab tab.
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Badge Brew Coffee
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In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Christy and Robyn discuss with retired Firemen/Police Officer Keith Contant. He talks about how he unknowingly was providing peer support. Contant now has taken that to a new level with his organization First Responder Peer Initiative
30 Years of Service
Keith spent 30 years as a Chicago Fireman and part-time Police Officer. Contant got to know how both fields deal with processing or not deal with processing the calls they go on. Struggling at times, he realized he had to change something in him. After his marriage and relationship with his kids fell apart, he started with the EAP via the City of Chicago network.
Seating at the Table versus Sitting in the Squad Car
After a call at a firehouse, you go back to the station and sit around the kitchen table and have a conversation about how the call went, what it made you feel like, and even sit in silence together. As a police officer, after a call, you get back into your squad often alone and key up for the next call. Never really processing the last call or how it made you feel. Keith as a police Sargent would sit behind a building, car to car, and talk with his officers. Processing the call, how it went, how it made him feel, and the officers would at times open up to him. As a superior, this is leadership that came naturally
Guns are pulled less often than a Mental Health Crisis
The reality of how often an officer pulls their gun from the holster or even fires their weapon is rare. Keith mentions he knows cops in Chicago never even pulled their gun their entire career. Mental health struggles are completely different; this happens more often because of the lack of understanding and support.
Peer Support
I wish when I was younger I would have paid attention more~ Keith
It took longer than it should have to understand the importance of peer support. Contant talks about missing signs before getting help and not understanding the importance of having someone to talk to. Find the person you can be vulnerable with, another officer, fireman, family member, retired first responder, or a counselor. Providing support for First Responders is necessary, even more so from the beginning of their career. Coming together with the common struggles can help open up the conversation. First Responder Peer Initiative is there to help start that conversation and support each other.
Mission BBQ
Keith’s girlfriend a community ambassador for Mission BBQ saw the difference he makes in First Responder's life. She started bringing him along to the visits to firehouses, police departments, and veterans centers for him to open the conversation and provide them, with someone, they can relate to. If there is anything we can do, be present in the conversation, allows them to speak, sit there, cry, or get angry, it will help save someone.
Beyond The First Response Show Links:
First Responder Peer Initiative
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In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Robyn and Christy have a discussion with Zion, IL Police Officer Matt Thornton. He talks about what it’s like to be working the very same streets on which he grew up. Thornton went from a cop in crisis to a cop in Christ, giving back to the new generation of street kids finding their way, through his non for profit My Father’s Business
Rookie Season:
It’s funny to hear a cop has a rookie season, but it is a season of a career that takes you from one extreme to another. Hitting the streets as a rookie was harder for Matt than most. With Thornton’s own family affiliated with the streets, after making it into the police department, the family turned away while some of the officers on the force turned their backs. Determined to prove himself, he forged forward. Matt rolls up on one of the biggest cases of his career; there had been a serial killer in the area and he struck in Matt’s hometown of Zion, brutally taking the lives of two young girls. While still on scene, a conversation was struck up and how seeing this affects the officers. A higher-ranking officer replied; “it’s not a big deal.” He learned quickly that day that showing emotion is not part of the job and the process of keeping everything bottled up began.
Shorthanded
The Department was shorthanded, making days long and the stress-levels high. Everything begins to pile up inside. “I have always done things to the extreme,” said Matt. Jim Beam was always a social thing before, but as it turns out, when the streets you protect become heavy with hours worked, it becomes more than just social. Ultimately, the choices he made wrecked his first marriage.
You Can’t Live Life with the Morals You Have at Work
Between three to five years into his job, his marriage has failed and the stress, pain, and depression have finally caught up with him. Matt began seeking help, but suicidal thoughts began to occur often. Planning when, where, and how was at the top of his mind. After a girlfriend walked and found the gun on his chest, she turned him in. His counselor asked him why can’t you live life with the morals that you have while at work? Truthfully, he loved my sins more than the good.
The Sign
The plan was made to take his life. Letters were written to those he loved and hated. He had instructions on what song to play and what he wanted to wear in the casket. While on shift on a cold winter night, Matt went to a Walmart parking lot and began crying and screaming “God if this is not what I am supposed to do show me a sign!” Ready to follow through with his plan, he looks up, and sees a woman walking toward his squad car with something red in her hand, wiping his eyes, wondering why in the heck is this woman coming this way right now in the blustery cold weather? Matt rolls down his window and asks how he can help. Handing him a small, object, she looks at him and says “You need this” then walks away. Looking down at the object was a small red cross. At that moment, he knew this was his sign.
The Badge Was Killing Me
The badge was killing me, and because of that, I used it for evil. Now understanding what it was doing to him, he uses it for good by giving back to the community and helping street kids through his non-profit, My Father’s Business. Matt began writing a book alongside one of his mentees that tragically died by suicide in 2020. His letters can be found in the forward of their book, Cop in Crisis to Cop in Christ. All proceeds go back to My Father’s Business.
Beyond The First Response Show Links:My Father’s B
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Robyn and Christy have a discussion with Chesapeake, VA Fire Captain Chris Moore about your mental bucket overflowing into a dark place. Chris opens up about his “mental bucket” overflowing and how he overcame this with the help of his family and his service dog Lewis.
Mental Bucket Overflow
Having been a fireman for 19 years, in 2017 the stress of the job combined with daily life began to weigh him down. Darkness is the place many first responders sit and in those moments you feel the weight of the traumatic calls taking you places you didn’t know existed. Chris refers to the mind as a “bucket” and when it was not emptied, it eventually overflowed. `
A Chief Who Cares
In a department of 500 firefighters, the Chesapeake Fire Chief knows everyone by name and truly cares about his crew. Chief came to Chris in January of 2017 and asked to meet for lunch. Knowing he was not in a good place, Chris was confused and worried as to why the Chief wanted to meet. He was up for Captain and if the Chief knew of his struggles that could be his job so he turned the lunch down at first. However, after telling his wife he just made career suicide he changed his mind. To Chris’s surprise and relief, during their meeting they talked about where Chris’ mindset was at that time and his chief seemed truly understanding and invested in his well being. As time goes on we are beginning to see this change from administrations across the country.
Therapists Are Like A Pair Of Shoes
In 2018 Chris began his journey of therapy and learning tools for a different mindset. He made the decision on his own to find a therapist that would work for him. Not all therapists understand first responders. ~Therapists are like a pair of shoes it is not one-size-fits-all ~Chris
It is ok to interview a therapist until you find the right fit, in fact, it is incredibly important to do this. As Chris began weekly sessions, he found that EMDR therapy worked for him.
Lewis
Most people at work did not realize that Chris struggled with PTSI. Determined to overcome his pain, he was introduced to the non-profit Service dogs of Virginia. After a long screening process that included mounds of paperwork, a home visit to assure the space was appropriate, and family interviews, Chris took a trip to Charlottesville Virginia to meet the dogs, including the one that would eventually become his…Lewis. Concerned that they wouldn’t let him bring his new service dog to work, he lined up an ADA attorney prior to speaking with his Chief regarding his intentions. Ultimately, it was approved but only after an incredibly long and anxiety inducing wait period! Once Lewis’s training was complete, he was brought to Chris and has been by his side ever since 2020. Lewis brings so much more to everyone around him, although he cannot go on calls, when they get back, he checks in on Chris and is there for the other firemen.
PTSI
PTSI is a daily struggle for both the first responder and their family. Working together to learn tools and find a therapist to help is one of the strongest steps you can take. Chris started the process on his own, but not everyone is able to. It’s ok to ask for help for yourself or for someone you know. Check out our resource tab for therapists near you. First H.E.L.P
Beyond The First Response Show Links:Service Dogs of VirginiaFirst H.E.L.P. resourcesFire Engineering Magazine
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Robyn and Christy discuss what it looks like after you have a first responder suicide affect your home, the process of what goes through your head, and working to honor her husband with a line of duty death.
Robyn who is the marketing director for Red Help and co-host of Beyond the First Response has courageously shared her story with us…
Eric and Robyn
Eric and Robyn were together for about 25 years, meeting in their twenties. The fire department was not is his first job. They went to college together and pursued careers in advertising, living in Oakland and commuting to San Fransico. Enjoying their careers and life, then 9/11 happened. Eric has an Uncle that is a retired fire captain, so the fire fighting urges flowed through his veins. He realized that he was never comfortable with sitting behind a desk and was always out of his comfort zone. A friend of his mentioned that he was going to start taking come fire science classes and a local community college. Eric felt the pull to attend the courses as well. He left his job and began his three-year journey to becoming a firefighter.
2005
After joining the Alameda County fire reserves he was hired to a department. Beginning a new career, new home, new life, and new baby on the way. Tragically, the pregnancy was lost and they had to deliver their stillborn baby girl. Burying a child is one of the toughest things a family will ever go through. Eric still being on probation during this made grief more stressful. Working at one of the stations that experienced extreme calls, and tragic events, Three years after the loss of their daughter, they gave birth to their son.
Hindsight Being 2020
Looking back, 2018 things began coming to a head. Eric began to become more aggressive, drinking heavily and disappearing, home life became more isolating. Robyn, would confront Eric about the drinking and his disappearances, only for him to become more confrontational. Two months before Eric died, he disappeared again. Robyn reached out to a couple that they were friends with to help her search for him. Eric had been at a hotel drinking and wanted to take his life. Robyn had no idea how to help him.
Fast forward, to June 24th, 2019, she came home after picking their son up from school, only to see that Eric was sitting on the couch with a bottle in his hand. Robyn told him she walking out to get some food (as a means to call someone for help) and will be right back. He said goodbye to her and walked into the bedroom. This was the last interaction they had…
I had no idea how any of this works
Sitting in a hotel room, that Alameda County set up for Robyn and her son until they could find a place to live. She was given an attorney’s name and they spoke in-depth about the years before. Eric had PTSI, now they worked on getting the benefits of a line of duty death. Robyn not only was able to succeed in this, she and her son also accepted the medal of honor from the IAFF for the line of duty death.
Beyond The First Response Show Links:
Red H.E.L.P.
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On this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Robyn and Christy discuss the families left behind in the wake of a first responder parent’s suicide and how the kids can take the brunt of the trauma. Tiffany and her son Kyle lost Officer John Scollo to suicide on May 25th, 2015.
May 25th, 2015
John served as an officer in Florida, while Tiffany and Kyle lived in Ohio. When Tiffany’s phone rang asking if she had spoken to John she thought nothing of it since they had talked earlier that day. Knowing he had gone to the ER earlier that day for stomach pain she assumed a miscommunication. In reality, John had left the hospital and proceeded to take his family, friends, and 12 year old son Kyle on a frantic journey to prevent his death. Kyle not only lost his dad this day, but also himself.
Grief, Anger, Violence
Over the next four years, Kyle becomes aggressive, angry, and violent. Tiffany had no choice but to go to drastic measures to help Kyle. After reaching out to many places and trying different counselors she found Elements Wilderness Program. This program gives struggling children tailored treatment to help them build skills to overcome trauma.
Today
With a renewed sense of self, Kyle recently graduated from National Guard Bootcamp. With her focus now being on her own healing, Tiffany receives help for her PTSD. The two have come to realize as alone as they felt, they always have each other.
Beyond The First Response Show Links:
Elements Wilderness Programs
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EP 12: Joe Willis - From Military Police To Breaking The Stigma of Mental Health
In this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Robyn and Christy talk with First H.E.L.P. CLO, Joe Willis. We hit on everything from his family roots deeply embedded in the first responder world to his own path to becoming an MP to following his passion of educating others about first responder mental health.
First Responder Family
The first responder profession practically runs through Joe’s veins with his dad being a fireman and his mom a nurse. Joe initially wanted to be a fireman like dad but ultimately decided to join the military as an MP. To this day, he recalls his Dad’s first major event, a fire that ended in fatalities. He also remembers one of his guys struggling and how that affected how he did his job.
Meeting Karen Solomon at a conference
Joe began speaking at conferences after retiring from the military. At one of them he heard a speaker that had a passion for helping police officers with understanding mental health and the prevention of suicides. Karen Soloman caught the attention of not only the entire audience but something in Joe that made him aware he needed to learn more. After following Karen on social media, he began engaging in conversation and ultimately stepping into the role of Learning Chief Officer on the executive board on First H.E.L.P.
Smashing the Stigma
Joe has helped to create a curriculum that First H.E.L.P. is taking into First Responder departments all over the country. The First Responder Readiness course for Supervisors is changing the way our departments are viewing mental health. However, as with all culture shifts, breaking the Stigma takes time. By having these conversations one department at a time Joe hopes to drive home the message of #SoWhat if there is a conversation at the firehouse dinner table about that call that hit home? #SoWhat if you have to take your headset off and walk away for a moment? It’s ok to take that time and process the call, it’s ok that the call hit you differently than someone else.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Schedule a training course
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Trigger Warning
EP 11: Nate Fisher - Firearm Malfunction #BT1R
On this episode of Beyond the 1st Response, Robyn and Christy discuss what surviving a suicide attempt taught Nate Fisher, a retired police officer, active U.S National Guardsmen, and host of Surviving the Streets.
Nate’s childhood dream was to be a police officer and when that was achieved, he felt he had everything. His career spanned titles like Tactical Airman, SWAT, and servicing the streets of Houston TX. Inevitably, the work began to take its toll on his personal life. An effort to make some changes in hopes of saving his marriage was futile…the job had worn him down. Nate was about to hit his breaking point and then an accident that took the life of his partner changed his world forever.
Rolling Up on the Scene
Nate was the first officer on scene to find his partner stuck in his squad car. As he stood up to radio it in, he felt what he thought was his partner's pulse but quickly realized the pulse he felt was his own. The overwhelming guilt of feeling that he, as a trained officer, should not have made that kind of mistake became too much for him to bear. Putting his Glock to his head as his son slept in an upstairs room and his wife watching, Nate pulled the trigger. The gun malfunctioned. Glocks never malfunction. He tried again, and nothing.
Horses
Nate currently uses equine therapy and is passionate about touting its benefits along with current partner Sharon. Hanging out on her farm he easily discovered the healing power of horses and advocates this method as another tool first responders can utilize to work their way back from the grips of PTSD.
Beyond the 1st Response Show Links:
Surviving the Streets Fundraiser: Click to support
Surviving The Streets Podcast
1sthelp.org/podcast
EP 10: Dr. Theresa Larson and Podcast Host Jon Macaskill - Calm the Mind, Heal the Body #BT1R
On this episode of Beyond the 1st Response Robyn and Christy discuss the movement experience MRx with Dr. T (Theresa Larson) and ‘Men Talking Mindfully Podcast’ co-host Jon Macaskill. MRx was developed as a way to bring your mind and body together as one to create an organic approach to healing from past and present traumas.
After four years in the United States Marine Corps and playing professional softball, Dr. T. began a career in physical therapy. However, she quickly realized traditional PT didn’t satisfy her desire to incorporate the whole body and mind. With this in mind, she set off on her own to start MRx, a mindfulness movement that also allowed her to build work around her personal life with her family.
Mindfulness & Movement Experience (M2)
After meeting Jon Macaskill, a retired Navy Seal turned mindful meditation instructor (among other things,) they bonded over their shared passion for finding a more holistic means to overcoming one's traumas. The Mindfulness & Movement Experience is taught to First Responders and their respective departments. Once the course is completed the participants then begin a 21-day challenge which forces accountability until the training becomes a life habit.
Beyond the 1st Response Show links:
- Movement-RX: https://movement-rx.com/
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G.E.B.Y. is an acronym that I hadn’t heard before speaking with Ernie Stevens. Stevens is one of the now retired San Antonio police officers taking part in the documentary Crisis Cops. Try to imagine if you will, two officers trying something different; plain-clothed and going on calls when community members are under mental stress. That’s exactly what Ernie and his partner Joe did when they saw a need for change regarding how the community viewed police officers. Ernie and Joe are open about their struggles and continue to speak out making change everywhere they go.
Now retired, Ernie purchased an RV and spends meaningful time with his family. You can imagine how hard it was to find a way to unwind as a civilian because remember, once you retire you leave the job, but the job never leaves you. So, he packs up the RV (of which he has never owned before) and sets out for adventure. Once he pulls into a campground, gets out the chairs and sits under the stars he is able to breathe. For the first time, Ernie’s wife saw him take a deep breath and exhale.
G: Gratitude, take a moment in the morning or before shift and journal about gratitude. For Ernie, one of those moments was his wife, experiencing a moment of him breathing peacefully for the first time.
E: Exercise, whatever that means to you, the gym, the weights, hiking, make it yours, even for a short moment can change your mood.
Breakfast: Food, eat to heal your body and mind, healthy food each day before shift, well at least once a day, shoot for the moon, try eating healthy all the time.
Y: This one is the most important, so don’t be fooled that it is last. As you through the vest on, the helmet on, the stethoscope , or the headset on. You are the most important part of your day. Taking time to take care of you, is the number one reason to G.E.B.Y. every day.
If you haven’t seen Crisis Cop yet, check it out https://ernieandjoethefilm.com/
Check out First H.E.L.P Podcasts at https://1sthelp.org/podcast
TRIGGER WARNING
Battalion Chief of Special Operations, Damon Covington of the Oakland Fire Department joins us to talk about the struggles of what the job has on you after you leave the scene of a call. He speaks of what changes need to occur to help the mental well being of first responders and their families. If it wasn't for the Chief's faith and his mother, he would not of been able to find a healthy way to cope.
Anna Courie Director of First Responder Health and Wellness at FirstNet built by AT&T speaks openly about what brought to taking her passion of helping First Responders.
Thank you FirstNet built by AT&T for your Sponsorship
Beyondthe1stResponse #FirstHelp
http://www.1sthelp.org/podcast
Mark Peftzer and Jarrod Slindee both active police officers, one a third generation cop. They have been working together for years, now they are taking their passion for the job to a whole new level. After starting the Guardian Initiative non-for-profit. They are rowing 3000 miles across the ocean to bring awareness to First Responder awareness.
www.1sthelp.org/podcast
www.row3000.com
We all have been a Karen a time or two in life!!
Karen Solomon CFO of First H.E.L.P., discusses how her experiences in life lead her to meet Jeff McGill and Steve Hough forming First H.E.L.P.
www.1sthelp.org/podcast
*TRIGGER WARNING* Episode contains graphic descriptions of officer involved critical incident.
After Dr. Jeff McGill's partner was shot three times, his job was to notify family. How do you do that when your partner is being transferred to a different county?
Steve Hough, was shot once in the face and twice in the legs . After months of surgeries and recovering, Hough and his partner started to see the need to understand mental health in first responders.
Joe Willis, executive board member passes the torch for Mindset Monday to Christy Lister of Blue Help and Robyn Mikel of Red Help. Mindset Monday just got better. #MindsetMonday has moved to podcasting. Our Mindset was to continue the conversation from any where at anytime with Beyond the 1ts Response.
Welcome to Beyond the First Response. The host of the podcast Christy Lister and Robyn Mikel, introduce themselves and what we are about.