Investigative Selfism: Recent Episodes

Justina Poskeviciute

Like investigative journalism, but looking inwards!

Investigative Selfism a project on mindfulness, personal development, and leadership. It started ten years ago as a compilation of my travel stories - with a strange title that I found really cool at the time - as I’ve lived in Southeast Asia, Europe, the Middle East, and South America.

Now, it is a platform that contains initiatives to boost our energy, confidence, resilience, mindfulness, and, most importantly, kindness.

It was a combination of an unexpected tragic event that I witnessed recently and the continuous witnessing of Israel’s mass murder in Gaza that sparked this episode.

In it, I share two reminders with you that can help when you’re navigating difficult times.
One, it’s a reminder to give yourself some grace. Can you acknowledge that it IS a tough situation you never had to navigate before?
Two, it’s a reminder that you still have your values and principles and ways how you want to show up in this world. You already have tools and you can always look for more.
It’s what I need to remind myself every day. And I know that it’s so many of us witnessing genocide being unleashed onto Gaza have to do, too — to simply continue our lives but also to continue speaking out, according to our integrity.

It's difficult to see a population being destroyed.
It's difficult to see acquaintances - and our leaders - express Fascist views.
It's difficult to expect friends to speak out but not always get it.
In short, there's a lot to process: both what's happening in Gaza and the world.
For me, it took a long time to consciously allow myself to feel my heartbreak completely. And, honestly, I'm not sure I'm really there.
But I'm here, sharing with you what I have 💔✊🏽
Thanks for being in this community ❤️
Justina

mentalhealth #trauma #collectivetrauma #grief #activism #Palestine #genocide #Gaza #FlourMassacre #gazagenocide #ceasefirenow

Although this post might seem like a strong “You know, you should really…” it actually isn’t.
It’s not a ‘should’ but an invitation to slow down for an hour or so and reflect on how you’d like your 2024 to be. Or, rather, how you would like to show up this year.

Just the past five years, I’ve moved countries probably more than five times, changed my career completely and switched jobs four times, navigated a relationship and a breakup, and managed to do whatever else I was doing.
As a political commentator, I’ve followed, written about, and got my heart broken over a number of issues.
So I am not here to say “just plan your year and follow through”.
I’m here to say that no matter how any year goes, with its endless unknowns, we still get to choose our intentions. And even if we don’t follow through on something, I’m still choosing to consciously decide what those (albeit potentially failed) projects will be.
Most importantly, I’m choosing how I MYSELF want to show up, what qualities to bring, what to learn, and what – the hardest part for me – not to repeat.
The rest? The rest is in my episode.

I hope you take the time to listen to it and, more importantly, I hope you take that time for yourself.

Happy 2024,

Justina

I'm closing this year inviting you to explore the importance of feeling our emotions (including healthy anger) and not disregard what an alarming amount of research points to.
The connection between suppressing healthy anger, the stress it creates on our immuno, neuro, and endocrine systems, and chronic illnesses that stem from that IS alarming.
I'm inviting you to embark on the path that can save us all a lifetime of illnesses 🙏🏾

This is not an episode that contains "answers" -- but what I do want to do is to hold space for everyone struggling as a genocide in Gaza is unfolding.

Through the guilt, shame, privileges, painful silence of friends, and other things to navigate, I invite you to both normalise not being OK and to move through it as you take meaningful action.

As I say at the very beginning of my episode, we are allowed to talk about how we feel about something without that becoming the story. And, I would add, to CHANGE the story, we have to try our best to take care of ourselves and our community.

My fourth season is all about getting real, so this makes a lot of sense to ask: what are you really about?

These past weeks have been extremely centering for many.

I also noticed how many people who could be considered (and in some ways, they really can be) intellectuals seem to, in the end, stand for nothing.

Your answer doesn’t have to be political like mine. But I do invite you to ask yourself:

What do you stand for?

Perhaps naively, I say sooo much clarity – and bravery to do what’s meaningful to you – stems from reflecting on exactly that.

As a political commentator who focuses on Palestine and a human, I have to say that the last month has been very tough.

But it has also shown me something that I know many of us have to navigate: being very much imperfect people doing work that matters to us.

I think to continue, self-compassion is a must, together with a very simple understanding that imperfections are (1) very subjective and (2) even if they're actually what we ourselves notice as something not ideal, still allowed.

As I say in my video, I’m not glorifying practices that aren’t good for our health, saying “anything goes.” But a lot goes indeed into being complex and multi-dimensional people.

As a political commentator and a person, I know this week has been a very tough one for anyone following what's been happening in Palestine. That is, including myself.As I admit to you in my video, even I, the person who preaches about the importance of self-care and being mindful of our mental health, failed at many things this week. Hence, this reminder is very needed --- and I talk about something very practical and truly very small.Please take care of yourself - for yourself and for the world.Justina

PS. What I forgot to mention in it is that – in addition to movement and connection – crying is an excellent way to release that stress, so if those tears are coming, remind yourself that that’s literally what your body needs.

Who we surround ourselves with is - it sucks to admit but science shows it's true - who we are in the end (well, not completely, but you know what I mean).

So let's get real about what that circle is and how to make sure it's what truly supports and inspires us.

The questions I’m inviting you to ask aren’t comfortable (but that’s the point):

In short: yes, there is, but it all starts with that awareness (yep, can’t escape that one).
I also share my stories that include both being in a small town and switching continents 👀

How is that circle, really?
How do the people in your life make you feel?
When you talk about ‘creating value’, what do you mean?
And is there something you can consciously change?

In short: yes, there is, but it all starts with that awareness (yep, can't escape that one).
I also share my stories that include both being in a small town and switching continents:)

Find the original video here: https://youtu.be/4D_wX7WFBWw?si=JIJDbHcY1fvJFSUf

I am very excited to be back and I've decided to make my fourth season all about GETTING REAL. It's about asking questions that are more uncomfortable, connecting the dots between the inner and the outer, and sharing a more authentic me with you.And you know, I start by doing exactly that: by telling you how I see Investigative Selfism and what bigger meaning it has in terms of my life mission.I'm also inviting you to continue on that uncomfortable journey of learning and unlearning. Because no matter how not fun it might be sometimes, what's REALLY not fun is never unlearning everything that has been installed in us like some outdated and limiting software.

I'm finishing the third season of Investigative Selfism and will be taking a short break until September.

But I can't leave without saying something!

I wanted to say a big THANK YOU for being curious, caring for yourselves, and taking the time to learn about the frameworks I was presenting to you here.

Not everyone does it. Not everyone has a growth mindset and seeks knowledge that can actually make the navigation of life a little bit less hard.

But you did it - yay, it's a big deal!

My longer videos and podcast episodes will be back in September but I will continue sharing good stuff with you on Youtube in shorter clips, on Instagram, and on my website.

See you there!

Justina

You can never know how powerful a word of appreciation and encouragement can be.
So why whyyyy would you hold back? Especially when you mean it.
Choose to be that caring and encouraging friend.

That's it! That's the gist of my quick episode.

Choose to empower your friends ❤️
The whole third season of my podcast is about empowerment and since there's only one video/podcast episode left before I go into a quick break in August, I thought it would simply be incomplete without reminding you of this:

YOU have the power to encourage others.
YOU have your sphere of influence.
YOU can choose to empower your loved ones, just like you'd like to be pushed.

So please please please, don't think of compliments and words of encouragements as of some finite resource.
Use them when they feel genuine.

Be an active participant in your own life -- including affecting the ones around you.

Find this episode as a video on Youtube here: https://youtu.be/CnMa6Lvkixs

I can't say my third season is on the topic of empowerment if I don't address one major part of it: our physical health. Why? Because no matter how important it is to manage your thoughts (and I talk about ALL THE TIME), you simply can't intellectualise yourself into health.

"Health" is super broad, I know. But this is where the good news is: there are SO many areas you can choose to explore and learn about.

In my episode, I explain why, according to science, it's important and what those broad categories can be.

You can also find strong podcast recommendations (by doctors and scientists) here: https://bit.ly/3PJgcGt

I start with a ridiculous story from my weekend of a kayaking experience that didn't go exactly as planned. But what my episode is on are six learnings/reminders that I've extracted from it and want to share with you.

Why? Because how we FRAME our experiences is so so so important. And especially experiences that we choose to call challenges.

I give you examples in my episode, yes, but you can also find my guide on how to quickly (re)frame your challenges here: https://bit.ly/42wL3J1

Find this episode as a video on my Youtube channel here: https://bit.ly/3CNyTkt

I must admit that it's been difficult for me to find healthier ways to navigate social media.
Interestingly, it's not so much about consumption but my own desire to appear a certain way --- does that resonate with you?

If it does, and if you've ever wondered how you're appearing on different platforms or how you'd LIKE to appear, please please watch this.

Thankfully, there are much better ways to see social media than running the risk of losing our authenticity in this navigation process.

That's what I share in my episode, including pointing to a beautiful interview you can find linked in my article: https://bit.ly/3N4FNXm

If someone asked you why you should invest in yourself, what would you say? Why do the work of personal development, healing, empowerment, or however we choose to call it?

I have a pretty damn complete answer to that question. I mean, it makes sense, since my whole Investigative Selfism project is very much about that.
And even if YOUR answer is different, I'm sure that mine will be a reminder that you always need to hear.
⁣
Please watch it and share it with others who need to hear this.

Also, explore my platform in the link below and sign up to receive a free guide I've just made for you!https://bit.ly/37wK95Q

I come from a very judgemental background: lots of passive aggressiveness, patronising comments, and body-shaming -- just to name a few cultural tendencies. ⁣⁣So I myself had a choice: either normalise and practice it or consciously reject it.

And oh my there are plenty of benefits of inspecting that judging mind!⁣⁣ Putting a conscious effort to judge less becomes so much more than just about "being nice". In fact, it's not about being nice at all (although it's a good side effect!).In my episode, I talk about why judging less becomes about self-compassion and healing in the end.

Can we truly grow if we're rejecting certain parts of ourselves, denying certain experiences, or holding onto shame?

Unfortunately, that's not what different disciplines say. So if we want to talk about empowerment- which has been the topic of my third podcast season - we have to talk about own our life story in a way that's healthy and involves a lot of self-compassion. But we also have to identify the potential dangers that we might find on the way.

That's what I do in my episode! I also share a personal story as a cautionary tale of over-identification with certain experiences.

I think you'll love it. More importantly, I think you'll find a lot of inspiration for reflection.

When do you feel strong? When do you feel most like yourself? When does your life "make sense" to you? When do you feel proud of who - and how - you are?I'd say, these are excellent questions to ask if we want to lead lives of authenticity and courage. Empowerment has been the umbrella topic of my whole third season and I have talked about it a lot. Now, what does it mean TO YOU?

Watch this as a Youtube video here: https://youtu.be/3PkaN67mpC8https://youtu.be/3PkaN67mpC8

Have you ever reflected on what courage means to you? I'd say, to lead a life that's authentically ours, sometimes (always?:) we need to engage in active reflection - and take conscious action - towards the kind of person we want to be.
But let me explain it in my episode!

Why do we take some things personally and others not? What can help us to go deeper and let this burden down?This is no easy task. And how deep you want to go with this work depends on how willing and how equipped you are to do it.In my episode, I present four suggestions: four reminders, questions, and invitations to go increasingly deeper into this work:

“What A says about B says more about A than it says about B”
Is it really worth my time?
Maybe it’s true? Can I get curious here?
Why is this triggering me? Can I explore it using a lot of self-compassion?

Please watch it and see what works for you. I hope you choose to do the work. It’s never easy but it’s always worth it.

To say "I'm a perfectionist" might not be as cute as you thought.

Why? Because there is one meaning of this word that is extremely unhealthy. But only if we never learn about it.

So learn about it in my quick episode and find resources on fear management here: http://bit.ly/3XkVfBU

There are many ways to define empowerment and any progress toward being the authentic and intentional selves matters. But is there something else?

Is there something we can put the work to uncover that would help us move forward in significant ways?

I think there is. I don't know what it is for you and I don't know where that healing lies. But I want to invite you to embark on that journey as it can only be rewarding.

Do we think we have the capacity to change? And if we do, what would that look like?

If you said YES to the first question, you might have what is called a growth mindset. It's a simple yet empowering concept that can help us shed more light on how we are showing up in this world and how to close a gap between how things are and how we'd like them to be.

Learn more about it in my episode, including a couple of questions for a powerful reflection.

If we're basing our growth on something, let's make sure it's not destructive. And that's exactly what shame is!

In my episode, I explain the difference between shame and guilt, why shame is not your friend, how we can approach shame, and what's a healthier base for us to base our growth and learnings on.

In short, shame is not a good house for us to live in. There are much better environments we can choose for ourselves.

Why would we ever do anything, including work on ourselves?

I believe that behind any investment in ourselves we find three ideas that can continue moving us forward in times of good and bad.

These ideas might seem simple -- but to truly believe in them requires a lot of work. And reminders, like this episode!

You can also watch it as a video on my Youtube channel: https://youtu.be/7iS_3F7FYpo

"Just have better problems!" would be arrogant - and ignorant "advice" to give to anyone. That's why it's not what my episode is about.

It's about reframing certain challenges in our lives in ways that are more empowering. As we do that, we can see that some challenges are "safer" (more familiar) than others. Behind the safe challenges what we often find are higher-quality problems: the ones that bring more meaning into our lives.

This is what my episode is about. And this is what I'm wishing for myself and all of you: to have better problems!

It’s so easy not to be in tune with ourselves.To keep on running without ever giving ourselves credit for the meaningful ways in which we’ve changed and without setting the intention of our own growth.Let’s not do that.As I’m recording this in December, I’d like to invite you to take the time completely for yourself to reflect on how this year has been.

What are your learnings? What were your discoveries? How did you show up in your relationships? And how do you want to go into the next year?

When we bring the unconscious to the surface, not only do we better understand ourselves but we equip ourselves to make better choices about our own lives.

I hope you see yourself as important enough to take the time and engage in this work.

You can also watch this as a Youtube video (and see me speak, yes:) here: https://youtu.be/ZE9-7LWYixg

What we choose to put into our precious minds is no joke.

That doesn't mean there is no place for entertainment and anything playful here. Yet what we choose to consume and what people we spend time with can influence our focus, our emotional state, our habits, and so much more.

In my short episode, I invite you to take your well-being seriously and inspect what you allow into your mind. Not because it's a grim duty but because YOU - your life, your emotions, your thoughts, and your dreams - matter.

You can also watch it as a video here: https://youtu.be/Y8DdjpbaIZY

If your family can be called functional, congrats – statistically, you’ve won a very important lottery!If not – like me – you might need to put some work in when spending time with your folks.In my video, I present four quick points that can serve as reminders for ourselves when spending time with family:

It's a test for our patience and mindfulness,
It's an opportunity to check how our boundaries are doing,
It's a chance to see how compassionate we can be with the one who we might not like so much, and
It's a reminder of what we don't want to pass on and an encouragement to do the work needed.

It's not our fault what happened to us and to our extended family that shaped us in certain ways.

But it's our responsibility to learn how to deal with situations that are potentially unpleasant and unlearn what has been unwillingly passed onto us.

If not with us, when will it stop, right?

Watch this as a Youtube video here: https://youtu.be/MqPEyfGtx58

Don't get me wrong: our values, dreams, and mission ARE to be taken seriously. Yet we don't have to choose to bring grimness to our journey.

It's easy to get entangled in everything we do, only to forget that it's supposed to be light -- and that it should bring us joy, right?

Personal development, self-knowledge, healing... Even when the path is hard and the challenges are real, we can choose to bring some silliness to all this. IT'S ALLOWED! :)

To watch it as video, please go to my Youtube channel: https://youtu.be/yOkB1TRxArQ

How do less drama and more meaning sound? You might have heard the saying “choose your battles.”

Although it can be deconstructed in many ways, what it means is an invitation to choose where we’re putting our time, energy, and emotional labour.

What I do in this episode is give you four points that can serve as more specific frameworks for us to assess a situation – or…our way of being! – to decide whether something IS indeed a battle worth choosing.

These points are:

– checking our egos (ouch)

– getting some perspective in

– addressing our codependent tendencies

– identifying and aligning with our mission and values.

I think this is so important in the broader context of empowerment (which is the topic of the third season of my podcast). Why?

Because only when we choose those battles wisely and learn not to invest ourselves into what’s trivial, unhealthy, or just not what we’re about we can make time and space for what truly matters, right?

Find resources on codependency on my website: www.investigativeselfism.com

Can we take the spark of a certain extraordinary experience and bring it to our regular lives?

I think it's not easy but it is, thankfully, possible.

For me, that experience is definitely travelling. It is something that has shaped me immensely and has enriched my life in ways I could never imagine. But what is it about it that changes the way I am?

In this episode, I share my thoughts with you on exactly that and some suggestions on how we can "extend" that experience when we're not technically in it anymore.

When we talk about empowerment, let's not forget one huge source of it: our friends!

Be it their struggles, the way they're navigating their lives, any major changes they're going through, or their openness about their journeys.

Let's listen to them and let's give them credit. Because it's very easy to move through life without ever doing that.

It's not all about famous teachers, therapists, and other personas. It's also about the ones closest to us.

The concept of empowerment is much more than how to keep ourselves motivated and work on our confidence. It's about the tools we have to live more fully, to know how to face challenging situations and navigate complex issues.

That's why it is the topic of my whole third season! There is just so much to cover!

The second season of Investigative Selfism podcast focused on discomfort: how we can normalise it, reframe it in a healthier way, and move through it. Now, it only makes sense to extend this topic into empowerment itself.

Let's do this!

And thank you for being on that important journey of self-knowledge, or, as I call it, investigative selfism!

“Why don’t you tell the kids about your prison experience?”

Wait, what?

It’s a sentence you might not hear often. Unless you’re me and you’re kindly asked to talk about politics to students once in a while.

In my podcast episode, I mention this story briefly and I’ll link to it in a second.

But what I talk about in it is how discomfort oftentimes is a price we have to pay for the lives we want to live. They don’t have to involve politics or prisons, but it’s good to know that “a good life” will probably never mean zero discomfort.

So we either try to avoid it or normalise it and see it as the price we pay for a life of integrity.

Before I proceed, my abovementioned prison story – in a more humorous form – here, while the reasons why that story happened lie in parts of my political project.

“Happy 2-year COVID anniversary!” I thought to myself recently.

And decided to do a quick episode on it.

If my second season is all about discomfort, who can deny that COVID has been one uncomfortable experience?

In this episode, I do reference a piece on COVID learnings from a year ago and promise you to share my resources on boundaries.

You can find them here: https://wp.me/p1WQjD-Mo

Since my whole second season is on discomfort, it’s time for an important reminder. Taking care of ourselves when we’re moving through discomfort is not a luxury. We can live without luxuries but we can’t go on if we’re constantly burned out.

Here’s my reminder on why it’s important to be kind to ourselves when things are tough and how certain things that seem unimportant become the base for us to go on from.

In this episode, I share a personal story, give some small examples of what we can do to prioritise our health, and as promised, here are some resources – more reminders and actual tools! – that you can check out: https://wp.me/p1WQjD-Mh

"The quality of your life is the quality of your relationships."

If you’ve ever had a bad day (a bad week? a bad month?) because of one single person, you know how true it is.

So if relationships are at the cornerstone of how we feel, how can we improve this area of our lives? How can we deconstruct what there is to be improved (or, rather, worked on) in the first place?

In my episode, I summarise several (out of…an infinite list!) areas that we can start looking into – with practical guidance – if we want our relationships to be even more profound:

how to listen deeply and respond with empathy,
how to respond and not react,
how to set healthy boundaries,
how to uncover how we’ve been wired (how we see relationships, how we attach to people, etc.) because of our traumas,
how to notice emotional manipulation and tendencies like codependency and narcissism.

I hope you listen to this episode (or watch it here: https://youtu.be/IURvFRzhMDU) and invest this time into improving the things that are at the very core of our wellbeing.

You can find all the resources here: https://wp.me/p1WQjD-M8

I understand it's not enough to say "just normalise discomfort". OK, cool, but how do we do that? What can help us to take that uncomfortable action? Luckily, there are some practical tips here. In my previous episode, I was all about "be OK with discomfort!", "understand why it's so important to choose your discomforts wisely!"

In this episode, I quickly share a strange metaphor and then move to describe a quick but surprisingly effective exercise that can push you into taking that uncomfortable action.

Honestly, it has helped me personally to take some hard decisions in life and I simply have to share it with you.

The trick here (like with many exercises): it only works if you do it.

This is a message I'd like to hear as the year is ending, as a year is starting, or on any other day.

In my episode, I dive more deeply into why it's so valuable to normalise discomfort in our lives. Or, rather, why it's important to CHOOSE it.

It sounds weird, I know. But I have wonderful quotes and some stories for you that I know will be worthy of your time.

After a long break, I'm very excited to tell you that my podcast is back. The learning and unlearning didn't stop, nor did my desire to share everything with you. I'm very excited to dive more deeply into a number of topics, but first - a wrap-up of my first season with a (very unsexy, oh my!) description of what waits ahead.

*My apologies for the ambiance sounds: I was filming this during my travels and hey, that was NOT a controlled environment:)

To watch a video that goes with this recording, please go here and subscribe: https://youtu.be/TsJlQsu911Y*

To respond with empathy might be our intention but it's not as easy it might seem.

Our busy and caring minds tend to jump to so many potential responses, yet we have to be aware that not all of them are what creates that meaningful connection.

So what is an empathetic response and what are the common mistakes we make?

Find all the resources I mention in my episode here: https://wp.me/p1WQjD-JZ

Deep listening is a thing: if you've ever felt that you weren't truly seen in a conversation then you know it's real.

How can we improve our listening skills?

What frameworks and reminders can we use?

I have some suggestions for you. That's a mix of what psychology, Buddhist psychology, and nonviolent communication point to.

A disclaimer: although they might sound like simple tools, they are NOT easy to apply. That's why, these are more practices than "quick tips". These are actual skills we can work on.

Hopefully, you DO want to be a better listener and are willing to put some effort into this!

So enjoy, LISTEN DEEPLY, maybe take some notes, and go into the world to apply it!

PS. This episode, like my previous one, is also a video on Youtube! You can find it here: https://youtu.be/l18udF05FRI (I am very proud to say that the whole video is one single take - that's how engaged I was while filming it!)

Fear is a companion we'll always have.

How we live with that companion is a choice: we can do that in ways that don't serve us and we can put conscious effort to manage our minds just a little bit better.

In my episode (which I start with a ridiculous personal story!), I share several approaches that can help you befriend your fears.

Not to negate or minimise them, but to accept them, embrace them, and go through them - with a bit more courage - to see what's on the other side.

For more resources on fear, please see www.investigativeselfism.com

Sometimes, the way to encourage yourself is to...discourage yourself!

Among so many reminders to "keep on going", we also need reminders to quit the thing that's wrong for us.

This podcast episode is exactly that: it's a kind reminder that we can allow ourselves to quit the things that don't serve us anymore. We can put the tool of quitting into our personal development toolbox.

Here's a quick article with more resources for you.

Why? Because it ties so nicely into so many topics I've already covered in my podcast and articles.

But more importantly, because it's an incredibly powerful framework to use.

To think about integrity can be extremely useful when you feel that "something's wrong."

If we take emotions as signals - as we should! - one of the ways to analyse them can be asking yourself a simple yet powerful question:

Are my actions aligned with my values? Well, in fact, there are more questions to ask - I talk about them and much more in my episode.

I also share my own "integrity story" that explains why I had recently taken a short break from producing episodes of this same podcast (oh no!).

You can find all the other episodes I reference in this one here: https://wp.me/p1WQjD-Ev

What's the difference between "I DID something bad" and "I AM bad?"

Turns out, it's a huge one.

"I did something bad" describes a behaviour. That's guilt.

"I am bad" focuses on the self. That's shame.

The price of not realising the difference between these two concepts - that we sometimes use interchangeably, right? - can be a life of misery.

So, I ask:

What does shame correlate with?

What's the danger here?

What are major shame triggers?

And how we can work on our shame resilience?

I talk about all this in this episode.

Listen to it now and share it with the ones who need it.

You can find an article with various resources that I mention in my episode here: https://wp.me/p1WQjD-DA

(How to go from seeing a boring Excel course as something exciting?)

We all know it's not enough to say "Just take that action!" - if anything, an encouragement like this can sound rather annoying.

("Thanks, cool, yes, I'll do it now, since you've said it...")

To feel that momentum, we need much more.

So what is that exactly?

To deconstruct this concept is a monumental task ("I need some momentum to do it..." I thought to myself!)

There's just so much to talk about, and so many different ways to approach it.

In my episode, I present to you one of the ways to do that.

You can find all the references and the promised visuals here: https://wp.me/p1WQjD-D9

A warning: this is a painful reflection exercise.

Another warning: it can result in meaningful change.

What I talk about in my episode is the price of inaction.

It's a simple concept - that comes with that painful reflection exercise - that allows us to better imagine what the hidden cost of not taking a risk is.

Neurolinguistic programming would say that our decisions can have one of the following drives:

We are either (a) moving away from pain or (b) moving toward pleasure.

If we've normalised the pain we are in right now, maybe we have to remind ourselves how painful it will be in the future, if we DON'T take any action?

This is what I explore in my episode.

Don't pay the price of NOT listening to my episode! Listen to it now!

And explore similar resources at www.investigativeselfism.com

If you've ever heard someone brag about a new healthy habit they have formed recently you probably wanted to roll your eyes (at least a bit).

Yes yes, habits are very important.

But they truly are, and that's why we need to talk about them.

Habits can either serve us or reinforce our limiting beliefs. They can also help us establish our identity if we're willing to truly commit to pursuing our curiosity. In this episode, I reflect on two categories of habits.

One, habits that we might be keeping since a long time ago, but also something that serves us.

Two, habits we might be forming later in life: habits that come in a form of commitments and have the power to create a positive shift in our identity.

So yes, habits are very important indeed!

You can find the resources I refer to in this episode here: https://wp.me/p1WQjD-BH

You know those times when someone's driving you crazy? When your self-image of a kind and empathetic person is being tested?

Yep, we've all had those.

The bad news is that there's no shortcut here. To respond mindfully can be pretty damn hard sometimes.

The good news is that it's something we can work on, and it's absolutely rewarding.

In this episode, I present several tactics for specifically this kind of work. They're based on nonviolent communication, Buddhist psychology, and neuroscience!

Don't waste your energy on unnecessary worry, analyses, and anger - listen to this episode now.

"No mud, no lotus" - this might not be the prettiest Buddhist metaphor but man it is true!

This pandemic has sucked in many ways, and there's no magical metaphor or quote to make it go away.

What we can do, however, is to realise how much we have learned during it and because of it.

We should definitely appreciate that new knowledge: precisely because we have gained it through such a painful experience.

This is where you can find the resources I mention in my episode:

UNLOCKED IN A LOCKDOWN (a free seven-day challenge): https://wp.me/P1WQjD-p3
My article on loneliness and connection: https://wp.me/p1WQjD-zc

The work we do on ourselves and with ourselves is extremely important. But how can we bring that mindfulness, that empathy, that deep listening, and thoughtfulness to work?

I'd say, it's not easy. And your effort alone isn't enough. Yet there is a technique I'd like to share with you.

It's called adopting a leader's mindset - check it out!

Actually, don't JUST check it out: use it and see what happens!

You can find the article I mention in my episode (on identity and action) here: https://wp.me/p1WQjD-nu

This is the last episode of Watch Your Language!, a three-part series within this podcast.

First, we have learned about the importance of talking to ourselves with compassion. Then, we acknowledged that we can choose to use empowering language instead of disempowering language.

Now, it's time to start using the language of action!

"I might listen to this episode..." -- "I WILL listen to this episode, and I will have learned something new today!"

So watch your language, everyone.

More articles on similar topics on www.investigativeselfism.com

"I would like to quit my job but I can't."

"I just can't wake up early."

If you've ever found yourself feeling helpless and powerless, this episode is for you.

Interestingly, there are tiny ways in which we give up that power. It's truly surprising how it happens. Can we notice these disempowering patterns in our language? Can we change them? The answer is YES!

Why change them? Because it's never too late to reclaim that agency over our lives. How much awaits us on the other side of this action I can't even imagine. But we have to start here, with our language.

You can find articles on similar topics at www.investigativeselfism.com

Am I gonna live my whole life without having ever truly befriended myself?

A lack of compassion towards ourselves is no joke. It’s not a pleasant way to live. Constant negative self-regulation, playing small and seeing anything that didn’t go “how it was supposed to go” as a failure serves no purpose. It's not shameful to do it but we definitely don’t need to tolerate it.

We need to take care of our heads because the negative voices of society are already loud enough. Even if it takes time, even if it’s hard to rewire yourself, even if the fruits of this labour aren’t seen right away - isn’t it worth it?

However compassionate or mean your self-talk is at the moment, the good news is this is something we can always improve! We can work on it. We can put that conscious effort. What we need to do is to fully accept three simple steps that this hard but rewarding work entails.

Check out what those steps are here, in this episode.

And check out more resources here: www.investigativeselfism.com

Ah, the good old Buddhist saying:

You’re already perfect. And there’s space for improvement!

This is what Investigative Selfism is about. In this episode, I explain to you what you can expect from this podcast and what my take on “the project of our lives” is.

You can read more about that "project" here: https://investigativeselfism.com/

In this episode, I reveal to you why my podcast has such a lengthy title and what I will be exploring in my upcoming episodes. Ah, but let me tell you right away: it will be topics on mindfulness, leadership, and personal development!