Armed with some snacks, microphones, and The D20 of Fate, four guys walk-through movies from their past to see how they still hold up.
In a world of Batmen, Super Guys, and other flashy costumes, one man dared to just... mumble in a sewer and wave a gun around. That man is Frank Castle - Also known as... the guy who lives in the sewer!
Join us for a skull-free eighties movie with lots of beef, and even more cheese!
Arachnophobia. Not to be confused with Archnophilia, involves John Goodman doing his very best Bill Murray impression, a variety of spiders, as well as a smattering of puppets.
Join us as we witness another family with poor decision making skills!
As the title suggests, there's a dragon, and it apparently needs a good slaying. It's up to the wizard's apprentice to bring down the fire breathing lizard, and save the lives of all the maidens in the kingdom... and to show us his lil' dragonslayer, too!
Get your umbrellas, everyone! Its about to rain... no...rein...oh, no. its about to poop dragons.
Grease up your Bales, its Reign of Fire!
If you like buddy cop comedies, action movies, or just movies in general, you can't really go wrong with this classic. Eddie Murphy stars in a cool action comedy that still holds up pretty well. Also Balki is there.
Enjoy!
I don't even know where to begin here... Paul Walker is a normal high school kid, wearing half-shirts, grabbing balls, and getting mauled to death by lions.
Denise Richards is his secret girlfriend, who somehow winds up with her deceased boyfriend's brain inside a robotic dinosaur.
Do they bang? Yes, it is implied that they do.
Enjoy!
Ho Ho Ho, boy. I don't even know where to start with this one.
You've got an evil Santa, played by a wrestler. You've got a rogue angel, played by someone's grandpa.
you've got an entire town full of the worst kind of human trash imaginable, and let's not forget a complete douche of a protagonist.
Feels like Christmas.
Oh, yeah, and not a single mention of the big JC.
Enjoy!
Just in time for the holidays, comes another "War" in the "Stars" ! but this one takes place in a universe where I guess water is like gold, so these ships all have big ice freezers! However, this, despite being the name of the movie, has little to do with whatever the hell happens in this film.
Enjoy your space Herpes!
Remember when Sam Raimi was all "I'ma make a spoodermin film" and we were all like, "what no way?!" And he did, and it was a pretty good spoodermin.
Well, it's time for a bunch of 40-somethings to pick at it!
In the future, gladiatorial combat will decide who gets the goods around here. Enter our hero, a tall, thin man trained to fight by a reject from the star wars holiday special. Also, you got some Star Trek DS9 in there, too.
The spookiest time of year is upon us once again, and what could be more spooky than Gary Busey fighting a Furry?
From the mind of mindless drivel master Stephen King comes a novelette - turned feature film about a kid in a rocket chair and his drunk uncle, and a sister that everyone hates for no reason whatsoever! Thanks, Steve!
Anyhow, grab a fistful of fun size and have a chill, meaningful and positive Halloween with us!
What can really be said about this film that hasn't already? How about that it caused one of our team to expel his dinner?
Yeah, that probably isn't worth bringing up(get it?).
Anyway, join us for a meaningful and robust journey into the mind of Neil Breen!
Young Guns 2. It's basically the "Grown Ups 2" for the 80's. Get all them new blood actors together, and let them play cowboys and go "pew pew" at each other. What's not to love?
Imagine if you will, a found footage movie starring Godzilla.
Sounds pretty cool, right?
Now, instead of fighting other monsters, or stomping around the city, the film focuses on a bunch of douchebags having teen drama, and the big monster is basically a shaved bat with lice.
Maybe it'll win over the guys...
Guys, let's be honest - who among us HASN'T tried to make a girlfriend out of our computers? Our boys Gary and Wyatt certainly do, and it works! sort of. Join us as we watch a thirsty Mary Poppins try and get some high schoolers laid...
Weird Science!
In our latest sponsored episode, we answer the burning question - what if blind and plants? Join us as the world burns, salt shaker just out of reach.
In a world of shenanigans, horseplay and tomfoolery comes a film about the worst of all - Monkey Shines.
Don't worry, this movie has everything you could want. Monkeys. Drugs. Banging while monkeys watch. and of course, irredeemable morons as protagonists.
Join us, won't you?
Sometimes, dead IS, in fact, better. Hot on the heels of Meteor Man comes another story about a bunch of absolutely inept human beings, seemingly going out of their way to make the exact wrong decision.
Join us as we are baffled about why a doctor with a toddler would not fence off his yard when he lives next to a murder highway!
The hero's journey. We all know it. The biggest coward in town, basically sucks at everything, convinces the neighborhood kids to run away from problems. A freak accident leaves him with amazing new powers, with which he can help his community, and humanity as a whole. But instead he remains a complete coward and sucks so much, they kick his ass out of town.
Meteor Man is the story of a man wasting an amazing cast, and pretty much his career.
enjoy!
"So, you have a movie for me?"
"yes, sir, I do. Imagine we take a football player, dress him like the Terminator and highlander had a deformed baby."
"Deformed babies are TIGHT"
"Uh... well, anyway, he's the hero, an undercover cop, and he's taking on a biker gang"
"Amazing! So how does he defeat this biker gang and save the day?"
"Well, he pretty much screws everything up and the biker gang basically wins in the end."
"Shut up and take my money!"
Enjoy Stone Cold, y'all!
before Alien vs Predator, there was... Gary Busey vs Predator. An argument could be made that its basically the same thing, but this one also features a Danny Glover, and he is not ready for BS from either side.
Join our band of ugly mofos and strap in for PREDATOR 2!!!!!!
Hail to the king, baby!
This episode, the Guys check out the classic Sam Raimi Evil Dead sequel. How does one of the most quotable films hold up?
Join us for swords, sorcery, and so many skeleton puppets!
In a world where a hero can dress as a bat, or a teen can gain the awesome powers of a spider, comes a guy who can be in the sun for 90 minutes!
does it sound suspiciously like the cast of the podcast? Nah, it is none other than Liam Neeson himself, getting really upset over a stuffed elephant.
JOIN US FOR RAIMI
In the most touching live-action adaptation of The Lion King, Eddie Murphy plays everyone, including Arsenio Hall, really showing us some chops.
Anyway, this is my third attempt at flavor text, so just join us as we hail to the king in Coming To America
...Today!
Christmastime is here! And what better way is there to celebrate little baby Jesus, than with a movie about a bunch of cougars that want to bang a snowman with the mind of a child?
Pour the egg nog and get ready to absolutely hate Darryl from The Office, because you are about to get Hot Frosty'd!
Before Keenan Ivory Wayans took over television with his giant family, he was taking over the silver screen with his giant head.
Kind of an Airplane-esque comedy is born, and the guys will decide how well it holds up as a whacky crime drama!
Small Soldiers! A star-studded cast, maybe sort-of kinda top notch special effects sometimes, and of course, a crappy hamburger with an onion ring on it. What more can the guys ask for?
Let's find out!
The first family of Marvel. The Fantastic Four. Before Disney shovels out yet another sad failure based on this beloved franchise, let us take a look at how other studios failed. Did you say you were hoping Mr. Fantastic would do a stupid dance move? Or that he would give himself extra fingers? We have some good news for you!
Join us, as we choke down another rancid Marvel sequel!
The 1950's. Man has conquered the moon, and has set sights on the red planet Mars. Our intrepid team of Pomade-laden doughy guys must face the wildlife, and discover the hidden secrets of THE ANGRY RED PLANET!
It's AHHHHHHHHHHctober! The spookiest month of the whole year!
The boys are celebrating with a spooky style vampire style movie, The Lost Boys!
Say hello to the night with the crew, and stuff yourself full of candy corn!
I know what you are thinking - "Wow, Rob! That movie title sure is tedious!"
Well, let me reassure you, the movie itself is much, much more so.
Pull up a log, and join us for a film that somehow ends up being far more ridiculous than the name suggests!
If anyone told me in the year 2000 that we'd be getting Hugh Jackman Wolverine movies for the next 24 years, I'd probably have scoffed, but hey. Here we are.
Join the Guys, B- Negative, Snowflake, Safespace, and all the other New New Warriors for a mutant adventure!
Hey, all. What's up...
So yeah, we watched the first Star Trek Movie, and we are all just really tired.
Enjoy a heaping helping of whatever the hell this was!
VEGR!!!!
Everybody needs a vacation at some time or another, and what better place to go than Mars?!
There's no air, there's a bunch of goopy mutants, and let's not forget the constant threat of a crazy street shootout!
Sign me up!
Our good buddy Arnold decides he needs to leave his boring life married to a very thirsty Sharon Stone to go play detective for a bunch of melting weirdos.
Why not.
Join us for Total Recall!
Do you like cartoons?
Do you like cartoons that are 2 hours long?
Do you like cartoons that are 2 hours long, but are not anime?
Do you like cartoons that are 2 hours long, are not anime, and are not actually cartoons, but are real people acting like cartoon characters?
GOOD. HERE'S THIS.
Guys, if your friends don't believe you have a real web shooter, you need to get some new friends.
Don't give in to bullying about Spider-tech.
Uh, also, we watch the animated Spider-man movie. ;-)
Ah, yes. It makes perfect sense. Dark. Gothic. Just a little silly. Tim Burton, the master of Tim Burton films, is back, this time, with a bunch of celebrities in monkey costumes. At least there is a bunch of goofy wire work.
yay!?
If the 80's and uh... 80's have taught me anything, it is that the part 2 of any franchise is gonna be a banger. Empire. Aliens. Judgement Day(not 80's, but adjacent)
So now we follow up the "classic" "super hero" "movie" with Superman 2!
We can't wait.
The year is 1985. Tom Cruise is still in diapers. Tim Curry is in 90lbs of red makeup. A talented team of wranglers is hot gluing a horn to a horse's face.
Does that sound crazy to you? Well, you have no freaking clue.
Join us for Legend!
Nick Cage. But not Crazy Nick Cage.
Sean Bean. But not Dying Sean Bean.
Harvey Keitel and Jon Voight, but not scary...
I guess you get the idea. It's a bunch of actors known for stuff that they just don't bring to the table here.
Does it work? Let's find out.
Not to be confused with "How to DRAIN Your Dragon", a very, very different film.
Either way, the guys enjoy a lighthearted romp through a not awful movie.
No, this is no an April Fool's prank, at least, not on purpose.
This week, the Guys watch 'Bright', the Netflix Will Smith vehicle about racist Larpers, or something.
It's great. Find out how great!
Finally, a live-action adaptation of one of the anime's of all time, The Guyver!
Mark Hamill stars as the bio-boosted...wait, what?... he's not?... why is he on the poster?
...Uh, ok. sorry folks. So, some no name dork struggles to act his way through this cosplay nightmare.
have fun!
What with the new Marvel film sweeping theaters, we take a look at an older gem, featuring none other than Nick Cage!
It's gonna be GREAT.
The Guys head to Metropolis to visit the first entry in the "modern superhero" movies. Join us as we learn if men can really fly, and if Brando can read his lines off of a diaper.
Ring in the new year with a classic tale of misfit kids being taught by a misfit adult. Let's hit the ice with the Ducks!
Ho Ho Holy Sh*T this movie...
This holiday season, the Guys embrace the void with Laurel and Hardy, a 20-something in old man makeup, some unholy pig creatures, and of course, a monkey stuffed into a Mickey Mouse costume.
Merry Christmas!
I guess this was our 250th episode? lol sorry everyone.
Joe sits this episode out, so ... y'know... good luck with that.
Watch Bill Murray do probably the worst thing Bill Murray has ever done. Yes, including that.
This is the action movie that changed action movies forever. This is the movie you desperately convinced yourself was really deep, and the reason you own anything from Hot Topic.
Get your finest goblet of rendered child fat, today we dive back into the world of Warlock!
You know its true, everything we do, we do it for you.
This episode, what we do is watch the Kevin Costner adaptation of Robin Hood.
Pour the mead!
It's Halloweeeeeeeeeen!
Time to break out the candy bucket, and eat as much as you can before those rotten kids get here.
Also, time to watch something spooky!
I think we can all agree, that what the world really needs is more Jurassic sequels.
And of course, we need sequels that can't decide if they are bad action movies, or bad horror movies.
Enjoy this bad movie with us!
Sorry, everyone. I fell ill, and totally forgot to upload the new episode.
So here ya go! It's got Tom Cruise, and a laser that leaves only pants.
Mmmboy! The year is 2009. The Transformers live action movie was a wild success, despite being less than popular with critics.
Hasbro sees a golden goose, and just starts squeezing the crap out of it. Literally, it would seem.
Enjoy this pile of goose crap!
Poor Kevin is home alone again.
Well, he's not home... and he's most definitely NOT alone. There's people all up in this movie.
Is he lost in New York? Hard to say... He isn't really lost, so much as accidentally abandoned. In fact, he seems to know exactly what to do, and where to go...
I'm having an existential crisis right now...
OH! There's also a crusty old bird person.
The Guys collectively buzz the tower before oiling up for some sweet beef-on-beef volleyball. Kindly join us for our review of the 80's classic, Top Gun!
Yeah, it's weird. Our latest sponsored episode in which a warlock (or witch?) drinks the fat of that one kid from Step by Step.
Here it is, probably one of the most universally beloved films we've done on this podcast. It's just so cozy, and feel-good. It's funny, and full of genuinely touching and thrilling scenes.
of course Bric doesn't like it.
ah, High school. the time in a young boy's life when he moves to a new state because his dad is a huge wuss of a karate teacher. Then he hallucinates about the ghost of Bruce Lee......'s stand-in. And of course, has a weird sexual awakening with his best friend/Michael Jackson impersonator.
Before he was slapping comedians, Will Smith was choking dogs to death and giving drugs to cartoon rats.
Join us for another dumb vampire movie!
Oh boy! another video game adaptation! Oh boy! Ben Kingsley.
This should go well.
The Guys also test the new "most Oreo" Oreos, and a few maple snacks from Trader Joe's
Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men?...
The Phantom!!! ... or the Shadow? Green Hornet.
The guys watch one of the many old serial super hero flicks from a few years back.
A bunch of kids fight off an invasion. If only we'd send them trillions of dollars and maybe some tanks...
Swords and sorcery abound! Witness the epic clash of accents as Red Sonja and not-Conan... fight...bang...
yeah.
The guys that are not sick get together to watch some classic Santa-based specials.
It goes about as well as you'd imagine.
A couple of trash men basically cover up a murder they didn't commit. Also, Keith David is there.
Neil Breen. Visionary writer/actor/director.
The Guys take in his first film, and their lives are changed forever.
This episode, we have a movie that was sponsored! I swear... this was not a critical fail roll... or a Rob 20. Someone paid us to watch this.
Thanks!
It's spooky! It's scary! It's... November!?
Yeah. I dropped the ball a bit on this one. Hopefully y'all still enjoy it!
long before they were blowing up models of national monuments, Roland Emmerich was trying to pass off to slabs of beef as zombie robot assassins.
The guys are getting too old for this, but they decide to go ahead and check out the start of the Lethal Weapon franchise!
The guys are getting too old for this, but they decide to go ahead and check out the start of the Lethal Weapon franchise!
Things go off the rails as the guys check out the Antonio Banderas vehicle/Zorro reboot Mask of Zorro.
Things go off the rails as the guys check out the Antonio Banderas vehicle/Zorro reboot Mask of Zorro.
We welcome back Louis Gossett Jr. as he teaches some bowl of oatmeal how to start a war.
It's judgement day for James Cameron, as he puts the finishing touches on his 6 latest entries in the Avatar film series.
The guys settle in to discuss a film made before he lost his damn mind, Terminator 2!
Wanna see Ice -T look like a crazy kangaroo monster? Wanna see Gary Busey for 2 minutes?
Here's a movie for ya!
Plus, a segment of Fat Chat Test Kitchen!
Here we go, back into the world of Michael Crichton! This time, Jon is joining us, because he chose the damn movie!
Freaky Friday with d*cks!
Hey, if you like our show, leave us a review on itunes or apple podcasts or whatever kids use these days.
Please email us! We'll read anything!
the4ampodcast@gmail.com
What is "the fifth element"? Love? unobtanium? Mila Jovovich's b--bs?
Well, whatever it is, Bruce willis is gonna find it.
and we are gonna watch it.
Join us, won't you?
the4ampodcast@gmail.com
Do you remember Home Alone? Disney does. They made the same movie again, but terrible, because everything you remember and love is no longer good enough.
So pour some egg nog, spike the crap out of it, and try desperately to follow this incoherent movie with us!
CONSUME!
The boys are back! ...again... sort of.
after another hiatus, a few of the group enlist their good friend Jon to chat about the first film in the Hellraiser franchise!
It's spooooooooooky!
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Music by The Trample Prancers
You know what happens when you roll a 1? THIS is what happens when you roll a 1. The Guys once again delve into the library of master storyteller Michael Bay and his Transformers films.
It goes about how you would expect.
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Pretty much exactly what it says on the tin. You got a cupboard, you got a little toy "indian", you got some hijinks.
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Music by The Trample Prancers
This week the Guys eat a plate full of Steven Spielberg's table scraps, in the form of a "charming" story about alien robots that take over a run-down apartment building in New York, so they can have sex in it.
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Music by The Trample Prancers
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Music by The Trample Prancers
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Lady...Hawk... Ladyhawke! I get it! Join us as we watch Michelle Pfeiffer turn into a gif, then into a feathered football. Marvel as Rutger Hauer turns into Sirius Black, and hucks a claymore through a man. Sigh as Matthew Broderick plays himself.
LADYHAWKE!
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Music by The Trample Prancers
Find our episode archives at www.4ampodcast.podbean.com
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Music by The Trample Prancers
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Unfortunately, this episode suffers from some technical difficulties. Hopefully you all will still find our banter enjoyable, despite missing a chunk of commentary.
Movie Review, Dorks, Nerds, Comedy
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Well, it seems our episode numbers are hopelessly screwed up. Hopefully I can keep them straight going forward.
Thanks to Pat for sponsoring this episode!
Movie Review, Dorks, Nerds, Comedy
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Music by The Trample Prancers
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Movie Review, Dorks, Nerds, Comedy
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Music by The Trample Prancers
Movie Review, Dorks, Nerds, Comedy
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Music by The Trample Prancers
Movie Review, Dorks, Nerds, Comedy
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Movie Review, Dorks, Nerds, Comedy
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Movie Review, Dorks, Nerds, Comedy
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Movie Review, Dorks, Nerds, Comedy
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Movie Review, Dorks, Nerds, Comedy
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Movie Review, Dorks, Nerds, Comedy
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William continues to run a train on our boys, this time submitting them to the pile o' meat that is Terry "Hulk" Hogan.
He wears a tutu, and pretty much nothing else happens.
enjoy!
In the first installment of our hostile takeover by listener William, the guys take a deep breath and try really hard to comprehend this "movie"
It does not work.
The first one's free, the rest ya gotta pay!
Part 1 in our 6 part series about the new Netflix Transformers series, a couple of us take a crack at the War For Cybertron!
if you enjoy this episode, please consider becoming a Patreon patron for access to the rest of the series!
Feel the rhythm! Feel the rhyme! Get on up, it's podcast time!
Yes. I did type that. Cool Runnings. It's fun!
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This time around, the guys watch John Carpenter's The Thing.
Prepare to be scared by a goopy mess monster that features upside-down spider face guy, as well as garbage pile with random dog heads man!
It's pretty great.
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Music by The Trample Prancers
Sorry for the late episode! one of our Guys is in the middle of moving. I won't say who, but he does the hosting, editing and uploading of all episodes.
Anyway, this week the guys head off to Monster Island, and run into all kinds of fun characters! enjoy!
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Music by The Trample Prancers
this week, the Guys dig up another zombie-ish movie from the 80's, but this one has mouth slugs!
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There comes a time in every young person's life where they have to ask the question: "Can I dig it?" This week, the guys will answer that very question.
By that I mean, they will sit at home in their underpants, talking about The Warriors over Skype.
Can you dig it?
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From the mind that brought you the terrifying Xenomorph of Alien(well, he didn't design it, but wrote the screenplay...don't @ us.) comes a satire on 80's culture, zombie movies, and keeping your pants on in a graveyard!
It's a comedy!...?...!
Return of the Living Dead!
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Music by The Trample Prancers
Batman. Robin. Batgirl. Nipples. Crotches. PROBLEMS. The guys tape their eyelids open to suffer through what could only be described as "2020 in movie form", and one of them is even pushed to cheating...
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This week the Guys speed all the way to this year with Sonic The Hedgehog. How will they respond to a movie based on a video game?
Gotta go fast.
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Music by The Trample Prancers
The Guys take to the Shumacher-era Bat-films, and Rob takes to the bottle. Riddle me this? How long before the episode goes completely off the rails?
Grab your skin tight rubber underoos and join us for Batman Forever!
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Music by The Trample Prancers
The Guys watch Little Shop of Horrors, and it may be the best Steve Martin Movie yet.
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Music by The Trample Prancers
This week, the Guys contemplate the rainbow connection. Time for some Muppet-y fun!
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Music by The Trample Prancers
This week, the Guys get emotional as they talk about Pixar's not-quite-direct-to-digital release, Onward!
They also talk about the finer points of marrying a half-man, half-horse, and exactly what a horphan(sp?) is.
We also read some mail from our lovely Patrons!
It's a real hum-dinger.
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Music by The Trample Prancers
Get ready for some real "Kai-Jinks" as the Guys take on Pacific Rim!
I don't really have much more flavor text, I pretty much just had the "kai-jinks" joke.
I thought it was pretty good, though.
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Music by The Trample Prancers
The guys try to lighten things up a bit with the classic comedy, Three Amigos!
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Sony. Sony, Sony Sony. What are you doing? what are you trying to prove here?
The Guys watch Venom. So, there's that.
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Music by The Trample Prancers
The guys take on the Double Deuce with Roadhouse!
Make us your new Saturday night thing!
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Music by The Trample Prancers
The guys travel once more to the "Five Deaths", to discover what new dinosaurs await them in this third installment of the Jurassic franchise. What wonders await them? Will they all be too awestruck to explain how thin the plot really is?
Answers:
A stupid Spinosaurus, none, and no.
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Music by The Trample Prancers
Get ready for pajamas, cereal and 80's all up in here! the Guys sit down for a Saturday morning slugfest, G.I. Joe... The Movie!
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Music by The Trample Prancers
Oh, No. They say he's got to go.
It's a scary place out there right now, so what better way to kill time than with the least scary version of a famous movie monster?
The guys sit down to discuss the Matthew Broderick vehicle, Godzilla!
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Music by The Trample Prancers
As the Guys tackle their first animated Disney film, they find themselves bought out by a mysterious benefactor. How will our boys handle the news? How do they like the movie?
All of these questions and more will be answered in this episode!
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Music by The Trample Prancers
In what some have described as "Die Hard, but on a mountain", The guys are once again hit with the avalanche that is Sly Stallone.
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Music by The Trample Prancers
"Imagine piles of ugly meat, veins of tangy mayo... and wrapped tightly around it all is a thin skin of sweaty, pinkish cheese"
also a CRAP-TON of explosives.
It's The Expendables!
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Music by The Trample Prancers
The 90's. A little company called "Disney" is trying their hand at... Super Hero movies?
One of those is about a young ragamuffin who straps a rocket to his ass.
We watch it for you.
Also, Happy Valentine's Day.
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Amidst piles of cheese and birthday cake, the guys face down an out of control bus full of the 90's. Will our boys be able to keep up?
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Welcome to 2020! The Guys start the year off right with a crazy Sci-Fi/Western picture. It's got cowboys! Robots! Sex Robots! And so on.
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