Heart as Compass: Recent Episodes
Ernie L Vecchio
Humbly sitting and assisting others in healing from severe trauma, Ernie Vecchio has spent his career understanding the human psyche and its response to suffering. His clients say: “It is sad that we have to sever a spinal cord or be amputated to realize that our inner life matters!” Today, Vecchio offers evidence that our shared inner journeys have a common theme—everyone experiences division. He suggests that people have to heal their inner division before such repair appears in the culture. Then, and only then, can we connect and be empathetic with others.
No podcast is complete without a ‘a similar voice’ that speaks from a place of experience regarding the joys and struggles of inner work. In that vein, Heart as Compass is honored to share the journey with mind, body, and soul life coach Irma Francis. Her support naturally fosters a sacred space for congruence, creativity, and a safe place to be. “I believe that within all of us there is a place of love and wholeness,” she says. “Once activated, a dimension that can help all of us be a higher version of ourselves.”
Tune into a discussion about author and trauma psychologist Ernie Vecchio, as we explore the ways in which he feels trauma can hinder emotional healing. He posits that our survival instincts, while beneficial in times of crisis, can lead to emotional suppression and avoidance of self-reflection. His teachings highlight the role of the ego in shielding us from painful emotions, and how this defense mechanism, though initially protective, can become a barrier to authentic living. He concludes by emphasizing the importance of cultivating an "inner observer," a compassionate part of ourselves that helps us acknowledge and move beyond these survival-driven defenses, allowing us to embrace our past while finding lasting peace and fulfilling our potential.
A discussion of The Roots of Self-Esteem by author and trauma psychologist Ernie Vecchio. He proposes that childhood experiences deeply shape an individual's self-esteem. He posits that harsh judgment, neglect, or criticism from caregivers can wound a child's developing sense of self-worth, leading to internalized shame. This shame can manifest in adulthood as self-protective behaviors like perfectionism or people-pleasing, ultimately reinforcing negative self-perception. Vecchio emphasizes the detrimental impact of such early experiences on an individual's emotional well-being and overall sense of self.
A discussion of Ernie Vecchio, a trauma psychologist, who argues that we often hold onto illusions that, while seemingly comforting, ultimately hinder our personal growth and fulfillment. He proposes embracing our mortality, finding worth within ourselves rather than seeking external validation, and accepting our imperfections as part of our humanity. Vecchio emphasizes the importance of living in the present moment, finding meaning in ordinary experiences, and approaching challenges with compassion and understanding. By letting go of illusions, we can experience a more humane and meaningful existence.
Ernie Vecchio, a trauma psychologist, proposes that early exposure to anger and violence can create a "bully" ego state in children, which can manifest in defensive and aggressive behaviors throughout adulthood. He introduces the humane spectrum, a framework for understanding how early experiences of rage influence our ability to relate compassionately to ourselves and others. Vecchio argues that identifying where we fall on this spectrum can help us recognize that our aggressive behaviors may stem from a need for self-protection rather than inherent personality flaws. This awareness, he believes, can lead to self-compassion and ultimately a shift towards more mindful and compassionate interactions with the world. By fostering a sense of security and openness in children, we can create a "humane universe" where empathy and kindness are valued above anger and aggression.
Beyond the Limits of Conventional Trauma Therapy is a discussion that examines the effectiveness of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) in addressing the complex trauma experienced by veterans. It argues that CBT, while helpful for specific thought patterns and behaviors, falls short when dealing with deeply rooted and compounded trauma. This podcast presents Ernie Vecchio's integrated model of trauma therapy as an alternative approach that emphasizes a holistic understanding of the psyche. This model, incorporating elements like the observer, the human spirit, the ego, and the heart, aims to facilitate healing by engaging with all aspects of the self. The discussion further explores the promise and potential limitations of psychedelic therapy, suggesting that Vecchio's approach could enhance the integration of psychedelic experiences, leading to lasting healing. Ultimately, Vecchio advocates for an integrated approach to trauma therapy that acknowledges the multifaceted nature of veterans' experiences and promotes sustainable recovery through self-awareness and inner strength.
A thought-provoking inquiry into human resilience and worth. As the songwriter, this song questions if we are truly 'worth our salt'—a testament to our ability to heal during self-recovery.
Welcome to the Humane Spectrum Podcast! Formerly Heart as Compass but now with a broader perspective. A brief intro about the focus of my writing and teachings.
In a world where egocentric tendencies dominate our culture and relationships, it is crucial to find a path that leads us towards empathy, compassion, and self-awareness. I offer you the story of Luna, a compelling narrative that teaches us that life is best lived awake.
Most of us know that peace is freedom from disturbance or a place of tranquility. What if it is stopping the repetitive thought of your inner critic or bully? A decision to seek a sensation that only comes through the open window in the center of your chest...the heart's intent. Making such a decision activates the two other voices inside you that desires peace, your inner counselor and mediator. The human spirit constantly moves us toward a place of presence because it doesn't want to feel miserable. It knows that misery is a form of motivation that spikes further defense against the present moment. Only the ego would labor over what is to come or not to come. Presence just is. As the poet Rumi says, "Be like a tree and let the dead leaves drop." Let your soul be silently drawn forth so the heart can point 'the way' to what it really wants...to simply BE. When one loses the ego's 'correct' way to become this is the sensation of love. A place where one loses a sense of self that is bound by the chains of thought. Angst will vanish in such a realization. Making peace with oneself allows joy to enter. Many describe this sensation as like untying the wings of freedom. A form of flight that is vertical and spiritual by design.
There are several forces that we use to construct our reality. These include spiritual gravity, weak, electromagnetic, and strong. The ego is rooted in the unconscious psychological logic of the rational or irrational and attempts to interpret life through a two-dimensional objective lens. In contrast, our heart or body consciousness (i.e., presence) resides in three-dimensional or subjective space. It is our strong/weak forces that dictate how we hold things together(feelings)and/or fall apart(emotions). While electromagnetism (our vertical connection to life) and spiritual gravity (heart vs. ego as compass) dominate our interactions at a holistic or mind-body-spirit level. In essence, these forces place us on a Humane Spectrum worth understanding if we are to evolve.
Join me as Don Hutcheson outlines the chronology of my career and passion to help others. Don interviews individuals who have discovered their true talents and how to use them to enjoy a life of success, satisfaction and freedom. Thank you Don a wonderful honor
Life begins as a reverberating, intelligent, observing burst of light I’ve come to know as your signature expression. This quality that many would call “soul” is a unified field of subjective consciousness that predates ego and “who am I?” by more than two years. Why should we care about this? Because this unique reverberating signature assumes (like life) a course of development that follows a sequence. If we don’t acknowledge what happens first, we can never fully make sense of our story! When we identify with what happens second or third, as if these events define us, we are telling a different story than life intended.
Join me in my recent interview as we discuss my international bestseller Feelings and Reason - Activating Your Heart as Compass Despite the Ego's Interference. As always, share with your community and by all means reach out if this episode resonates. Thank you, Dr. Gayle! Your energy is inspirational! Be well.
Teachers will tell you that spiritual intelligence is the capacity to conduct your life in such a way that it reflects a deep understanding of reality and yourself. A depth that is discovered through personal experiences and systematic spiritual pursuit. While this is true it is an ‘after what happened first’ definition. You are born out of a consciousness that has a single intention - YOUR expression. This ‘to be alive force’ is not theoretical nor in need of discovery. Examine that within you that FEELS unlived and there IT is! Rather than pursue what you already possess, allow it to be. This is what you learn when you monitor your only interference - the human ego. Our inner orchestrator and observer is the ultimate intelligence as it fosters the integration of our emotional and psychological life. Directly connected to our ‘heart as compass’ it is the source of guidance for all three.
Find on Audible -> https://adbl.co/3oGJBQh Learn from a trauma psychologist the wisdom of real people challenged with the task of overcoming severe adversity. Integrating their insights into a complete picture of the human experience, Ernie L. Vecchio reveals a developmental understanding of how adversity becomes an opportunity for self-correction, growth, and healing. By acknowledging that the human ego is only one-third of a larger system, people learn not only what is observing their life, but why and where it is intending for them to go. The problem is we’re stuck in between life as it is and life as intended with whatever the ego considers interference. But there is good news, a unifying intelligence within everyone that wants nothing more than to liberate our fullest expression. Bringing continuity to how this unfolds, we learn there are 10 absolute truths of being human.
Listen to Ernie L. Vecchio, a Licensed Clinical & Rehabilitation Psychologist who has written four books including his latest release, Feelings & Reason: Activating Your Heart as Compass Despite the Ego’s Interference. Vecchio is an international best-seller in four self-help categories and now joins eHealth Radio and the Health News and Mental Health Channels.
The spiritual gravity hypothesis states that there is an electromagnetic constant within the human experience affecting the push-pull and mass of our heart and ego. The formula indicates that when the ego is exaggerated in size and operating without the heart as compass, human suffering is increased tenfold.
As most of you know, inner work is the core foundation of the spiritual path. Without it, we’re fumbling around in the dark trying to find our way. There’s no purging, healing, transformation, or awakening without cultivating and understanding your inner life. Tune in this week as we briefly talk about the lost art of inner knowing.
Nothing is more important to mental wellness than a physical sense of ‘where’ someone is in their life and circumstances. There is a specific degree of coordination required with one’s above observer, spirited motivation, and adapting function before the heart can provide the balance it brings. Our full ability to navigate this existence requires the orientation of trueness NOT information. Integrity’s message is: ‘What you see is what you get.’ Listen in as this podcast touches on the realm of what it means to be level, balanced, and true
“The shadow is a moral problem that challenges the whole ego-personality, for no one can become conscious of the shadow without considerable moral effort. To become conscious of it involves recognizing the dark aspects of the personality as present and real. This act is the essential condition for any kind of self-knowledge.” -Jung-
Did you know that more than half of all bottled water comes from the tap. Meanwhile, a million bottles are bought around the world every minute. That’s roughly 20,000 bottles every second. These mind-blowing figures are driven by concerns over contaminated water. Most of us can’t tell the difference. Many of us feel the present is contaminated in the same way. Tune in as we discuss how this is sold to us like bottled water. Meanwhile, these fundamental truths exist: you’re a spiritual being forced to live a psychological reality; the problem is self-correcting by design; and presence - the only thing that exists - is free. We consider it ‘a present’ because the mind takes us to the past or looks ahead only to tease us with the NOW.
Humanistic and existential philosophy assumes that people want to live better lives. In the humanistic view, the assumption is that we strive to be our best selves. In the existential view, the assumption is that we strive to live meaningful lives. While these two concepts are similar and may lead to identical results, capturing an image in our heads to understand them is often difficult. Tune in this week as we briefly discuss the proverbial ‘fishbowl’ we find ourselves in.
Did you know that depression has a history that’s as old as civilization itself. In fact, we can find descriptions of depression in the hieroglyphics, paintings, and statues of ancient Egypt. The idea of a depression well is actually that old. Though we begin this podcast talking about depression a new idea comes through - disturbing presence. As much as I talk about ego interference, it’s important for people to realize that presence is jeopardized by external disturbance daily. Words that seemingly do not belong in the same sentence...disturbing presence...is society’s modern day paradox.
Ernie Vecchio is a mentor, spiritual teacher and trauma psychologist. During his 30+ years career he has treated over 10,000+ patients who suffered severe trauma that ranged from amputation, head injury, sexual assault, and paralysis. Ernie is a Licensed Clinical & Rehabilitation Psychologist who has written four books including his latest release, Feelings & Reason: Activating Your Heart as Compass Despite the Ego’s Interference, an international best-seller in four self-help categories.
https://www.etsy.com/shop/TinyBookBIGQuestions There is a difference between managing our outward behavior and managing our inward emotions, and both affect our signature expression (i.e. soul). While cognitive behavioral therapies (and religion) help provide a set of rules to guide our actions, it is spirituality that offers ways to manage our emotions internally. Those who combine the language and practice of each, are more likely to achieve some form of balance in their lives. But this language is foreign to many of us. This is rooted in the conflict between science and spirituality — between facts and emotional ways to explain the world. The problem is as old as human thought itself. Kant distinguished between theoretical reason (science) and practical reason (morality) and noted that such conflict is rooted in the brain. One tends to suppress the other and humans come to favor one mode of thinking over the other. Tune in as Irma Francis and I discuss how dialogue and language can ‘meet you where you are’ but you have to pose a quality question for this to happen.
https://www.etsy.com/shop/TinyBookBIGQuestions Has life ever punched you in the nose? If you’re normal, it absolutely has. While you were standing there bleeding, how did you interpret the experience? Let me help. You come into the world (before the punch) thinking “This is how it FEELS to be what I am.” Then…as life would have it (after the punch) there is no escaping yet another truth: “This is how it EMOTES to be what I had to become.” One is the experience, the other is the interpretation. Sit with this insight. If you didn’t know, the angst of the human condition is the friction between these two realities! Tune in as Irma Francis and I discuss a small but profound kernel of truth. Let me know how/if it touches you?
https://www.etsy.com/shop/TinyBookBIGQuestions Part of the reason we remember an egoless place is because we come from an egoless place. So, were not discovering this dimension we’re actually remembering it. This suggests that truly spiritual people have a pre-thought memory of being there and want to return. In contrast, religious people define their spirituality as a place where the ego lives. Once forgiven they get to keep their egos —even in death. Tune and as Irma Francis and I discuss a unique distinction between the psychology of secular and non-secular spirituality.
https://www.etsy.com/shop/TinyBookBIGQuestions Tune in as Barrett Self and I discuss ‘the work’ and thoughts about meditation, self-development, and recovering one’s authenticity. Are you more than your thoughts? If so, 'what' is the more so many people refer to? In my estimation, the cognitive-behavioral movement has SO taken over the mental health model that professionals are less and less equipped to treat trauma and ego dysfunction. And at some level, everyone is wounded. Helping people understand their emotional, spiritual, and subjective life has become a lost art. In my professional experience, reprogramming someone’s ego alone would have ignored the soul, spirit, and heart of the person in my care. This would have been a major disservice and prevented them from fully healing. Tune in and let me know what you feel. **Barrett is an active writer and speaker in the meditation and ‘awakening’ community. He shares a simple, direct message of the peace that comes from knowing and being your Self. You can reach Barrett on his platform exhalemeditation.co
https://www.etsy.com/shop/TinyBookBIGQuestions The transcendent quality of our current suffering is hard to ignore. I often have these feelings in nature. Today’s was no different. In my chest (not my head), I held the ramifications of what is happening to everyone around the world. In doing so, I felt hope. I know this is hard to imagine in these unprecedented times. You are invited to listen in and find out why.
It’s been said that the mind is not a container to be filled, but a fire to be kindled. Nobody fuels this fire better than those who choose to guide us along our journey. Mentoring is an archetypal activity that’s as timeless as life itself. The old and young coming together as opposites, often while secretly identifying with the other. This Innerlivesmatter minute honors the passing of my mentor.
Listen in as https://irmafrancis.com and I take a minute to reflect about your inner life.
Though the 'inner path' message predates most of the movements today by three decades, the language of ‘lives matter’ offered an opportunity to make the message current. ILM offers clarification.
The peace and contentment most of us seek is obtained when our inner world is congruent with the external, not the reverse. The genius of the human psyche is that when it is out of alignment, it sends a signal to the heart. If you didn’t know, this disturbance is because the ego is mistakenly viewing itself as our compass. Medication of such emotional experiences whether it be through prescription or substance abuse has become a national epidemic. What if this problem developed because of nothing more than our egos mistaken identity?
The question-answer portion of my talk today at the Center for Inner Peace in Pueblo, Colorado. Wonderful reception and great questions.
KLMR (in Lamar, Colorado) was kind enough to bring me on their morning show High Plains Focus. Be warned the show is 45+ minutes long. Ethan's questions help give you some insights to my teachings and some stories of my trek across America. Enjoy!
Intuitively, it certainly seems like a contemplative life in stressful times is a good thing. But, like any practice, it takes a certain level of commitment and is, of course, a process. Many would argue that there is no panacea or a “one size fits all” which I would agree. But, in my experience with trauma there is, at a minimum, an 'orientation to the task’ that is useful. By that I mean, a philosophy or context of a way to BE in the world - as a starting point. For example, that we are spiritual beings trapped in a psychological reality. This specific orientation (and there are many others) implies that ‘what’ we are contemplating is a ‘corrective’ return to our authentic self. Innerlivesmatter teaches that coming home to this authenticity restores a symbiotic relationship with an inner guidance system that not only benefits us but also society.
It has been my experience that spiritual growth is an endless process of suffering the ego awake. Said differently, healing the past so the we can fully live in the present. There are very specific moments of adversity that will slowly melt the ego’s defenses. Dissolving the ego is necessary because most of us are unaware that 'the way’ we chose to protect ourselves is often outdated. By this I mean that the ego operates out of the past with habitual thoughts and emotions with little understanding of how to arrive to a state of presence. This is the core of spiritual work. But, if we apply compassion to its resistance, the ego will soften its grip on the past. Overtime, it learns that with every incident of illumination and moment of presence there is also the experience of real freedom. Tune in for more...
Research shows that another person’s moods are as easy to catch as their germs. Spiritual folks tend to call this ‘negative energy’ which is a little inaccurate. It is only negative if you are unprepared to 'catch’ or absorb it. There are ways to insulate yourself but, this takes practice. Importantly, the protection is grounded in ‘where’ you are internally at the time.
Did you know that 1 in every 113 people on the planet is now a refugee. That means that 44,000 people are displaced every day, or one person every three seconds. UNICEF reported in 2016 that nearly 50 million children were uprooted that year. The stress that accompanies being displaced or relocated is social isolation. Loneliness and reintegration causes PTSD. At the family level, the loss of parents, siblings and relatives have the most devastating effect on children and teenagers. *Listen for more of the Camino Del Alma minute....
Young people need to learn that a person’s inner life forms the foundation for their external journey NOT the reverse. It dictates the choices they make and determines their direction. Essentially, the relationship they’re having with themselves influences their connection with others. Despite this important truth, the culture is still not helping them to understand that these unique navigational abilities though available, have to be discovered. Unfortunately, young people are gaining insight by random chance or even worse through post traumatic experiences. Listen to how one begins to have an inner life.
Kirsten Powers, USA Today: Depressed and suicidal - something is wrong with our culture. What if the truth is that our culture is ill-prepared for the dis-ease of what it means to be human. The people that are taking their lives, just like the shooters in our schools, are the extreme of an undercurrent that has gotten worse in the past three decades. In short, human beings develop a psychospiritual void if their inner lives are ignored.
What is the definition of evil? Typically, it is considered profoundly immoral behavior with other synonyms like wicked, bad, wrong, and sinful. The opposite or antonym for evil is, of course, good or virtuous. So, there it is… evil is a moral judgment that labels behavior as wicked or sinful. But, what about ethics. It turns out that ethics refer broadly to moral principles and represent a larger context. I would argue that it is the context for moral behavior that has become blurry and confusing.
Most of us were taught in school that metaphors were poetic or rhetorical tools. Our innerlivesmatter because metaphor is how the soul observes and teaches us context. It does this by helping us to see the larger picture, something the ego is usually incapable of doing until it awakens—if ever. Everyone knows that a picture is worth 1000 words, metaphor is why.
Individuals suffering with addiction are more than their demons or wounds. In other words, they are more than their egos. A psychospiritual context espouses this absolute: addicts (just like you and I) are spiritual beings forced to resolve a psychological existence. Perfect in their imperfections, they have yet to learn that their dis-ease is self-correcting in nature, which is true for every human being. This does not have to be stigmatized, but rather embraced with compassion. In other words, we (and addicts) need to be suffered awake. While the debate raves on that addiction is a brain disease, we are missing the co-occurring problem that addiction is accompanied by significant psychological dis-ease.
I think it’s safe to say that to be connected to one’s inner life doesn’t begin to capture the depth of a lifetime commitment to spiritual growth. But...there is a single focus one can use as a beginning. By that I mean, living an ethical or compassionate existence versus one that is ego-driven. This would be no small deal. You can wait for a wake-up moment like trauma or you can take the accumulative adversity that has been your life and--awaken to it. Either way, spiritual evolution is considered to be the first and most important step during one’s inner journey. Though there are no shortcuts – there is an orientation to the task that is sorely missing in the culture. That orientation is one of self-realization.
We’re being reminded here lately that when the rule of law decays in the culture, it’s usually because there are insufficient corrective measures to keep it in place. The implication is that we (especially the young) need to be aware of this decay when its occurring. It is the language of this discussion that made me want to add it to my Camino minutes. We’re talking about things like fairness, integrity, and truth with the particular emphasis on truth. In other words, we’re being reminded in 2018 that truth should matter.
Distraction is anything that puts us in our heads. The problem of course is that most of us are already there. Experts say in fact, 60,000 thoughts a day. Individuals on a different speed than the world around them can be challenging. Imagine ‘shame’ for speeding on the highway (as silly as that sounds) and you understand the anxiety, rapid speech, and hyperactive thinking of a distractible person. Always speeding. Always being told to slow down. Always breaking the speed limit. Always feeling like they are overwhelming anyone they interact with. Their first impulse is to be aware of their impulses. It’s this vigilance that creates anxiety. Hyperactivity and distractibility quickly become another reason to apologize for ‘‘how’ they are. Ironically, this energy has nothing to do with ‘what’ they are…a to be alive force that wants to reach its fullest expression…just like everyone else.
I couldn’t help but wonder what the western world was doing the other day with the Pope’s reprieve from hell. If you missed it, the timing was interesting – it was just before Easter. The relief from hell only lasted a few hours. If you didn’t see it the headline read ‘Pope says Hell doesn’t exist.’ I had to laugh and thought could you imagine…right. But, the folks around him were quick to say that the conversation may have happened but what the Pope meant was that ‘the WAY’ we talk about hell… doesn't exist. Here are my thoughts.
When passing the midway point on the Potomac (92-93 miles) the thought occurred to me that this would be a wonderful time to tell you a story—in particular—your story. One that captures your beginnings but doesn’t get your attention until the midway point on your path (35-45 years of age). You can tell me if it resonates.
If there is one repetitive theme that psychology sees in the human experience it is the conditioning that there is a right and wrong way to be. If you’ve been alive for very long, you’ve probably learned that rules nor morals actually change behavior.
If anyone is connected to Oprah, I strongly encourage you to have her people seek me out. Her recent quote on GMA captures the core of Intentional Guided Evolution a psychospiritual model of the human condition born out of my work with severe trauma. Though her words are beautifully valid, the culture lacks a context for the internal GPS she speaks of.
Emma Gonzales created the most poignant moment of the March on the 24th—with silence. 6 minutes and 20 seconds of not speaking created the reflection and introspection that happens when we are directed inward. Though the silence was striking, even solemn, it was a reminder that some things are beyond words.
Inner lives matter becasuse this dimension can be known. We need to remember that our inner world can be influenced by the ego but NOT controlled. The human heart knows our past but can still live in the present. Because of this gift, the heart demands to be heard! Ironically, the ego has more supporters because we’re asleep to the choices available. Our nature is to explore, inquire, and ask questions. This cultivates our inner lives. The subjective life feels in the same way that the ear hears and tongue tastes. It is a natural. To prevent, block, or deny its wise, deliberate, and guiding force becomes spiritual death. When we lose this form of communication with ourselves we cease to evolve and become robotic. This show solves the mystery
We would all agree that the excessive chatter of ego can rob our attention. We’ve also learned this distraction is at it’s worst when our inner whisper becomes a scream. While feelings desire a reciprocal communication with ego, emotions simply condemn and demand obedience. Feeling and emotiing is the difference between re-acting or re-enacting our lives. Spiritually, we need to know the source of our ego’s suffering if we are to comprehend its intent. As an adaptive function, we must understand what it has summarized as truth. If we don’t, our life is at the mercy of a false idea of who we are. This podcast teaches the importance of review and revision. Tune in as we discuss how to manage the volume of your inner chatter.
The soul’s wisdom can be ‘dimmed’ by our external lives so much so that we are guided by the ego’s negative self-assessment. The problem becomes that the ego (unless present) cannot experience ‘feelings’ in real-time. Nor, can it SEE that it’s not the observer. Thus, the biggest trick it plays is getting us to believe IT is, in fact, our witness. It accomplishes this by teaching us that a thought/feeling combined is more powerful than a feeling alone. Finding fault or shame in the past/future, the ego has little time to discover these feelings do not exist in the present. Everyone begins with a feeling nature that can evolve into a compassionate disposition. This is absolutely known in the heart and can be remembered. The formation of ego creates a ‘difference’ between these inner and outer worlds. It’s second trick is convincing us that the external is true and our inner life false. Actually, it is the reverse.
We learn very early (and come to believe) that the ego is in charge of our lives. However, the ache in our heart is the hint that this is false. Human angst is our longing to correct a broken spirit or the incongruence between life events and our feelings. When we believe the ego’s distortion of lack or loss, we shift from spiritual suffering to psychological victim. This is why there is no rest for a broken spirit. Separation from the soul’s intent is much different than the division of guilt and shame. The ego’s emotional resistance to heal such division paired with our feeling of separation becomes a dual problem. This show discusses the solution.
The differences between the WAY of ego and soul could not be more different. The ego stores beliefs and judgments of the culture and pairs them with our feelings to make emotions. For many, it leaves them swimming in pain. The soul’s objective and neutral vantage point allows us to react or feel our way until we discern the truth of the moment. While the ego devalues our feelings with judgment, the soul offers a context to install the heart as guide. Tune in as we discuss the balancing act between our inner and outer worlds. Suffering without becoming victim is the spiritual journey.
The sequence is clear. We begin spiritual and have to adapt to a psychological existence. Separated from the creator, and in a very short amount of time, we develop an ego to survive. As time passes, this ego becomes divided against the self or culture. The stage is set - life becomes a struggle between competing forces: inside and out. If we become depressed about this predicament, we will go through the motions of a life. Apathetic, afraid of being afraid, some of us introvert and suffer alone. This is/was an ego decision. If we are to ‘hold on’ to what we were in the beginning we must remember. This show discusses the ego’s tendency to feel insignificant in spite of the vast and opposite truth.
There is a low-level feeling (versus emotion) that has permeated the culture. Many of us would call it grief - a wish to reverse our sensation of loss. The question: What is it exactly that we think we’ve lost? It seems from a spiritual perspective, an illusion has fallen. The possibility that we have a shadow side, whether it's personal or collective, for many is uncomfortable and others unacceptable. The point is not that we may be divided or uglier than we imagined, rather that we are capable of much better. Seeing the truth is difficult but it is also liberating. In this show, we discuss this low-level feeling ‘as if’ it may be grief. It wasn’t until the editing that the truth came through. We are feeling humility—which is freedom from our pride and arrogance. If only for a moment, we are being humbled. This is actually a good thing. Tune in and learn that humility is not to be grieved. Instead, it is a wonderful opportunity to change and grow.
We’ve recently learned how anger can haunt us with a whisper. Little and vulnerable we can exhibit our anger by lashing out at the self or others. This is our first preview of the human spirit’s relationship to ego. We either retrieve the soul’s connetion (lost self) or the haunting will persist. You’ve heard the BIG question ‘Why do human beings suffer?’ These teachings give us the answer. Entering this existence as feeling beings we become imprisoned by the judgments of ego. Resolving the paradox of adapting vs. being literally ‘breaks’our spirit. Re-enacting or emoting the break fuels mean-spirtedness or anger. It is these dynamics that hound the ego until we awaken. This show asks are we more then this?
The Soul’s Intent encourages that we should never ignore our inner voice. Also, that the emotions that accompany these voices are not negative. It is their pairing that teaches and causes growth. We must re-enact the injustice of losing ourselves to hurt feelings if we are to ever recover our connection to our spiritual (soul) beginning. Feelings (before wounding) are manageable. When those feelings get hurt, we are still too young to know what is happening. In truth, spiritual or emotional angst is our motivation to self-correct. Because we are too immature to know better, most of us martyr ourselves to the ego’s anger. We have yet to realize that without spiritual angst, we would never awaken to the present. Because anger diminishes when it’s not fed, the remnants of our emotional beginnings leave us with trace anxiety. We come to know these remnants as a frightening internal whisper that disturbs us. This whisper is out first experience with self-inquiry: “Am I more than my ego?” There is comfort in this question because the soul knows we are. This spiritual truth is the same for everyone: ‘If we are not grounded while in our anger, we are like a moth to a flame and we will suffer.’
Have you ever been so angry or sad that it consumed your thinking? Such feeings can be overwhelming, so much so that many of us ‘numb’ ourselves in defense. Anger turned inward takes on the form of low-level resentment. Self-blame, self-punisment, and self-loathing impedes our spirit and divides us. In this podcast we discuss the changefrom feeling to emotional beings and shifting back.
Our inner voice develops when we are children. Initally, it is felt as incongruence between what our heart knows and our ego believes. Little do we know human suffering (passion) begins when we dare to question why. This is the birth of the human spirit. By design, our agnst begins the long journey of preserving truth against the overwhelming beliefs of the personal and collective ego. Tune in as we discuss the name(s) of these inner voices and how they interact with the 'whole' of who we are.
Psychospiritual means utilizing psychological theories of human development to identify and heal the ego’s division, while simultaneously giving station to the soul, spirit, and heart for navigation.
There is a need in today’s culture to have a definition of spirituality that aligns with what many would consider truth. The problem is ten people would give you ten different definitions. Tune in as we expand our discussion to a pure description of spirituality. One that offers integrity in an otherwise blurry dimension of the human experience.
Philosophy comes from the Greeks meaning ‘the love of wisdom.’ In the context of The Soul’s Intent wisdom is a disposition to find the truth coupled with a clarity as what to do once you have it. Developing wisdom is a key benefit of a psychospiritual perspective. Tune in as we discuss how this virtue unfolds in the human experience.
To pretend is to cause (or attempt to cause) what is not so to seem ‘as if’ it is. This is the creative act of pretending or imagining. Not to run from the truth or fuel a delusion, rather to discover a new perspective or create something that wasn’t there before. Psychology says that pretending joy or happiness can be a self-fulfilling prophecy. This simple but awake practice can help us discover and enhance our capacity for positive feelings. Few realize that pretend, pretense, and presence all include an awareness of time and possibility.
We hear all the time that some of life's greatest lessons are hiding in plain sight. You can see as a spiritual being when you close your eyes and try to see with something else. This is the vision of the human heart. It’s a perspective that allows us to feel our way through something versus grope in the dark. The ego automatically thinks it needs to have some sort of intellectual engagement with life. Is life right or wrong, fair or unfair. Meanwhile, the heart is simply looking for true and false.
We witnessed this past weekend what happens when the human spirit provokes us into passion and purpose. During the peaceful demonstration of healing and saying 'enough is enough' many are realizing (some for the first time) that this is what it means to have an inner life. It was/is a spiritual moment! (Though my cohost Irma Francis sounds telephonic in this recording the content was too good not to post.)
An often-asked question is: How do you tell the difference between your soul's guidance versus your ego's interference? In order to understand this particular show a couple of assumptions are made: the first is human beingx have a soul, the second assumption is that our soul operates as the observer of life. That being said we can proceed to look at how the soul's intent is quite different from the voice of the ego.
Ease drop in on a passionate conversation about why we are spiritual beings, the illusion that we cannot ask why human beings suffer, and much, much more as we have a contemporary discussion about spiituality that is important. At a time when 'fake news' is dominating the headlines, integrity in our inner lives is essential. This is the gift of learning the soul's intent.
Bridge building is an important step in moving between the worlds of ego and soul. Spiritual beings or incarnated souls in the face of overwhelming psychological forces requires its construction and care. One plus one equals a third thing (creation) when the bridge is functional. Otherwise, we polarize to one side of the equation and see our potential of wholeness in the distance but never realize it.
The soul orchestrates life for us to see on the outside what is happening internally. It turns out, this is a profound way to see what it is we need to change. Most think it is the other way around. If I can just get my life in order 'out here' everything will fall in place on the inside. Few realize spiritual growth is an inside-out process not the reverse. In this way, there is no better teacher than your own soul.
From the soul's perspective we are whole and more than enough. The Soul's Intent is for us to BE fully in this moment without restriction. Meanwhile, the ego is concerned about whether we are deserving, worthy, or good enough. In one reality we are free to love and exude authenticity. In the other, we are suffering for no apparent reason other than guilt or shame. The spiritual question is which reality represents the truth? Your soul knows the answer.
Self is defined as a continuity of consciousness where the ego enters this existence as a blank slate. Born with no innate ideas or right and wrong or true and false, knowledge (even enlightenment) is determined by the subjective experience that is you and I through our senses. The soul becomes constricted by these experiences until we shed the character we became to survive...to just simply BE.
We've all heard the dichotomy: “We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience.” – Teilhard de Chardin - Such phrases are important as we seek a valid context for our lives. New wisdom on human suffering suggests: "We are spiritual beings having psychological experiences." -Vecchio-
Most people believe that it is good to have a healthy ego but there is nothing healthy about ego in the spiritual sense until it has been suffered awake. The ego tries to convince us that it is there to serve and protect us. It says, ‘Where would you be without me? I am the fire in your belly.’ *This show discusses the ego’s real ambition which is to separate and imprison us from other people and keep us away from our soul's intent.
The human spirit is designed to provoke the ego awake which means our feeling re-action to the 'fated break’ from the soul is self-correcting. This can take a lifetime if we never realize that the Soul's Path is a conscious choice.
Spirituality defines soul as the essence of your human potential which is latent within you. We are told it is capable of being actualized and manifested in our daily lives. Most of us foget that the personality or ego is nothing more than a composite container of traits and atttributes used to adapt to our lives. Meanwhile, the soul is the contents of this container and a valid representation of who we really are.
Fear of being seen for fear of rejection, shame, or indifference is familiar to many. Spiritually, we know this as a transition from low confidence to becoming comfortable in out own skin. As we spend time in the dimension of fear we need to learn the art of self-reflection. This is different that being self-focused. One is ego the other is Soul.
The language of birthing captures the cycles of spiritual growth. Imagine, in the beginning we were conceived, gestated, and became pregnant with potential. All that remained was to manifest who we are IN the world. Unfortunately for many, our labor has been extended becasue we've resisted the cycles of our own evolution. Showing up in our lives is the beginning.
The human spirit provokes the ego to move, change, and grow. Unaware of this relationship the ego will resist with indifference. The result is the inner noise of frustrating and angst. The Soul's Intent is that the spirit and ego work together to achieve presence.
One of the culture's great weaknesses is its naivete regarding the dark side of human nature. It gets conceptualized in different ways (like sin or evil) which blocks our capacity to know its deepest value. Carl Jung called this dark side the human shadow.
The soul’s intelligence takes us on a journey of self-recovery that makes us who we are while revealing the truth about who we've become. Merging the worlds of psychology and spirituality, this podcast speaks to the conditioning of the human mind as it lays out pathways to transform our conviction from believing to knowing the power of our existence.
Self-judgment is probably best understood spiritually as a form of inner motion. Particularly, as two forms of movement with respect to the dimension of truth: recollection and repetition. Recollection is understood as recovering a truth that is already present in the individual, which has been repressed or forgotten. This is a movement backwards, since it is retrieving knowledge from the past. This backward motion alone can never discover the dimension of truth. In contrast, repetition is defined as "recollection forward" which is definitive movement toward not only truth but love and freedom. The recess or time out we will be discussing tonight is about not going backwards without moving forward. This is only possible if we are observing or paying attention. ~Vecchio~
Embarking on the spiritual journey is like coming up to the edge of a cliff. Everyone hesitates because the ego 'makes up' the leap will hurt them. Few realize we are seeing the height through the eyes of a child. In truth, we are more than capable of landing on our feet ~Vecchio~
The souls intent is that we recover who/what we were intended to BE before the interference of caretakers and culture. By learning to build a bridge between our spiritual and emotional-selves, we retrieve security and are less fearless inter-personally.
You've heard the phrase: 'Be yourself because everybody else is already taken." Why is this so difficult? The soul's reality is that it simply wants to be who, what, when, where, and why it was created. The ego's reality is that somehow this gets lost. This show speaks about the implicaton of not having an inner life and how this is the only way to retrieve the authentic self.
Spiritual people cannot accept that life is a failed experiment. Those who view life this way dominate the headlines weekly. Their guilt and shame are debilitating. What if our saving grace is actually granting ourselves mercy? This would mean freedom for time served-suffering. Imagine, no longer at the mercy of another but allowing your heart to make the choice.
New wisdom suggests that the ‘fated’ break from ourselves happens early. This means everything that happens after is a journey of realization. Feeling helpless and apathetic would mean that we've made up that WHERE we are from is WHO we are. There is not one incarnate soul that is the same as YOU. This is your truth. This is WHO you are!
Spiritual teachings advocate non-judgment. The soul’s intent is that we see human suffering as a natural part of being here. Imagine, many of us are swimming, imploding, and in the extreme, exploding from our suffering. New wisdom suggests this energy collects like morning dew to be used like a healing and self-correcting ointment. It’s not a coincidence that blood, sweat, and tears are matter(s) of the heart. When applied to our wounds we grow and cultivate depth. Tune in as Holistic Life Coach Irma Francis and I discuss how this division of self occurs.
Deep in our heart there is a call to return to the source. The needle that points toward this true north is beyond the physical world. It connects us to our Soul’s intent in a way that nothing else can. If this intelligence is inside of us, why does life seem so hard? Whether we are looking for happiness, inner peace, or supreme enlightenment, no knowledge can propel us forward like our heart and soul. Tune in this week as Irma Francis and I discuss how life is easier when we listen
The Soul's Intent is a way to be in the world. Future podcasts will teach Intentional Guided Evolution, Mediating Within, Gifted Compassion, the meaning of Spiritual Gravityand more. This show revisits the context of the book. Tune in as we discuss the wisdom of the soul's intelligence. Rather than wait for a moment of suffering, learn the 'self-corrective' worth of the adversity you've already experienced.
From a spiritual perspective, the ego is that aspect of the self that distinguishes itself from others through identification. It is our sense of ‘I’ and ‘Me’ that approaches life through our thinking. Spiritually, our true essence is discovered through authentication of the Soul. As human beings, we can choose to live daily as consciously observing life as a true witness. Psychologically, ego is our personal pride. Thoughts such as my intellect, my life, my wealth, my spouse or children are specific ways we attempt to acquire happiness. While the soul reveals how life truly is, the ego tells us how life should be.