Raise Your Inner Game Today with David Levin: Recent Episodes
David Levin
Helping athletes boost their mental game so they can go farther, feel better, and enjoy themselves more both on and off the field.
With so many elite athletes saying that meditation is the key to performing at their highest level, it would be easy to conclude that you HAVE to do it in order to be your best.
The problem is, most people can’t.
So, what to do? Does that mean they will never reach their full potential?
The short answer is no, they absolutely can.
And that’s what I talk about in this week’s post—how athletes can get the benefits of meditation without doing a minute of sitting.
Enjoy!
I was reading Chris Bosh’s book, “Letters to a Young Athlete” (which is great, by the way), and something he said reminded me how much it bugs me when people suggest you should “listen to your body.”
Now, I know what they’re getting at, of course. But the truth is, it’s actually terrible advice, UNLESS you add one important element.
Unfortunately, almost no one does. :-) Which is why this is one of the most powerful aspects of learning to raise your Inner Game.
So, that’s what this post is about—the correct way to take what your body is telling you and use it to help you be your best.
Enjoy!
There is a ton of advice out there on how an athlete can raise their game. And no surprise, it tends to say that the key is to boost their mental game.
The problem is, it doesn’t say much about HOW to do that, which ultimately makes the advice essentially worthless.
I mean really, if you’re trying to get someone to do something but you don’t tell them how to do it, what do you expect? :-)
Anyway, that’s what this post is about — the reasons most mental game advice falls flat and what you can do to help YOUR athletes break through and reach their potential.
Enjoy!
Here’s an interesting question: When’s the best time to start working with an athlete on their mental game? First thing? In the off-season? Only when there’s a problem?
I heard a great story the other day about legendary UCLA basketball coach, John Wooden, that got me thinking about that exact question.
No surprise, I suppose, but I ended up with a conclusion that you might not expect. :-)
Seriously though, this is actually a very important question, so I do hope you give this one a listen.
And besides, you can’t really lose—even if you don’t agree with my conclusion, it’s still a REALLY good story. :-)
Enjoy!
Negative self-talk is one of the biggest mental game problems athletes deal with, and every coach wishes they had a good way to help with it.
Unfortunately, there is a right way and a wrong way to do that, and most of the advice out there has athletes taking the wrong way.
In this week’s post, I talk about the two options for dealing with negative self-talk and why one is so much better than the other.
This is a super important topic, so please do give this one a listen.
Enjoy!
Do you ever find yourself in an angry, dark mood — and for no apparent reason?
It’s a bit of a mystery why, but it happens to all of us at one time or another.
It’s frustrating, too, because it can make us say and do things that we really wish we hadn’t.
But what can you do, right? It’s just a bad mood?
Maybe not. Maybe you can actually snap yourself out of it quickly and keep from doing things you regret.
Maybe you can gain the power to operate at your highest level no matter what else is going on in your life.
And maybe here’s a post to tell you how. :-)
Enjoy!
Introducing our newest podcast feature, Mental Game Monday. This first post covers what it is and how we hope it will help listeners. Enjoy!
A bit of a rant from me with this one (sorry), but I get really frustrated when I hear performance coaches talk about how to boost athletes’ mental game, because I know that so much of what they suggest just doesn’t work for many athletes, and it doesn’t have to be that way.
BTW, the reason their suggestions don’t work is because they’re missing the underlying skill that drives everything else.
Anyway, I get into all of that in this latest post.
Enjoy! And let me know your thoughts on what you’ve seen work and not work with your athletes.
This one sounds a little crazy :-) but it’s actually incredibly powerful. And something you can try right away.
Here’s to new heights!
P.S. I’ve been rolling out our new platform this week, so this is only the second post on the blog. (https://www.raiseyourinnergame.com/blog) The good news is, it’s a good one. :-) And there’s much more to come …
Saw a tweet the other day with a quote from Michael Jordan and it just blew my mind how clear and powerful a statement it was on what it really means to be focused as an athlete.
You hear a lot about the importance of focus and how it’s what sets the greats apart. But it’s not often you get such a clear image of what it actually looks like.
This is one you’ll want to add to your Inner Game toolbox, for sure.
Enjoy!
NOTE: This blog is now hosted at https://raiseyourinnergame.com/blog/ Come visit us there!
My past three months (below). Note the three columns, Sit, No News, Coke. Those have the biggest effects on my Inner Game. Pretty much completely off track with those for over three months. Yikes. And on the left, with the running, etc, you can see the frequency slowly dropping off. The longer I slip with the negative items, the harder it is to stay with the positive ones. Could not be clearer.
But the good news is, five days back on track and I feel completely different. I still want a coke several times during the day. I still want to check the news. I still have to work to make myself get out and run. Gravity hasn’t gone away. But I’m back on top of it, and each little win makes the others that much easier. And the feeling is night and day.
Best of all, getting back on was actually super easy. Decided, told the family, and started first thing Monday.
If you’ve been off track, you can get back on at any time. Just pick it back up.
If you’re still not using these tools to manage your Inner Game, now is the time. You won’t believe how easy it is, and you will love the difference it makes for you.
Pride is a funny subject. I hold it up as an excellent goal and guide for our choices. A lot of people see it as something to avoid.
I heard a fascinating interview recently that reminded that both are true. And that it’s important to be clear on its destructive potential.
So that’s what I get into in this week’s post.
A word of warning: The discussion touches on a topic that can sound like it’s part of the current political noise, but it’s really not. Trust me, there’s no way I want to get into that. :-)
But it is super relevant to current events, so I hope you enjoy the post.
Let me know your thoughts on this, too. It’s an interesting topic for discussion.
Enjoy!
SUMMARY
- The difference between “good” and “bad” pride.
- The powerful effects of both kinds.
- The fascinating way pride is being used as a weapon.
- Listen/read to get the full message.
ENJOY THE PODCAST
HOT NEWS & DEALS!
1) Check out our podcast, The David Levin Show. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-david-levin-show/id1401013964
2) NOW AVAILABLE: Limited Edition Raise Your Inner Game Medallion. Carry it in your purse or pocket. It’s an UP button for your Inner Elevator! Visit https://davidlevin.com/ryig/ to learn more and order yours. (FREE shipping!)
3) Raise Your Inner Game hardcover is now available for FREE! Comes with a 6-week online training ($97 value) and a private student forum. Learn more and order your copy today at raiseyourinnergame.com! (The book is free. You pay $7 for s/h)
WHAT I’M READING
FINISHED: The Murderbot Diaries. Martha Wells. 4 books in the series. Loved these SO much. Read all four in maybe 10 days. Super fun, too, because I thought maybe our 13-yr old boy would like them, too, and he is instantly hooked. His first sci-fi, and the first books we’ve enjoyed at the same time. Super fun.
FINISHED: This is shocking, but I actually watched a TV series. Jack Ryan. Amazon Prime original. I NEVER do that. Somehow got started and just blasted through season 1. Just like it was a big novel. Very well done. Looking forward to Season 2. But weird to be watching instead of reading. Didn’t like that part of it. Even more detached from people.
CURRENT: Tear it Down. Nick Petrie. This is my second of his Peter Ash books. Like them a lot. One of my favorites on the genre. Introduction threw me off, though. Almost quit a couple of times. Didn’t understand why it was happening. Glad I pushed through it. Loving it now.
[ transcript ]
Hey, it’s David Levin. Author of Raise Your Inner Game, co-author QBQ, the Question Behind the Question, Founder of Raise Your Inner Game Academy.
We’ll start with a little housekeeping.
Got a big promotion going on with my friend Kim John Payne right now. Simplicity parenting author. Free workshop coming up February 5th on Discipline and Guidance. “Why does everything have to be so HARD? or What to do when things get weird.” Should be really good. If you have school age children or grandchildren, you should definitely check that out. Simplicity Parenting.com for more information, or the Simplicity Parenting Facebook page.
I’m continuing to hear real enthusiasm for Raise Your Inner Game ACADEMY for High School Athletes. People are just fired up about this program. Everyone I talk to about it. Super fun to see. Still in beta, but I’ll keep you posted as that gets closer to opening up to the public. Should be coming up pretty quickly now. Week or two, I would think.
As always, would love to have you subscribe to the podcast if you haven’t yet. The David Levin Show. Just go to iTunes and subscribe there.
And of course, pick up your copy of Raise Your Inner Game. Get the hardcover for free plus a free video training. Just pay $7 shipping and handling. raise your inner game.com to order. It’s the quickest, easiest way to lower your stress, work at a higher level, and as the subtitle says, “Live a life you’re proud of every day.”
And that leads to the subject of this week’s post. Pride. Is pride a problem?
You know, it’s a funny thing. Our culture has some strong impulses that say yes, pride is a problem.
Don’t be too proud.
Pride goeth before a fall. Not every day you get to say Goeth.
He’s too big for his britches.
There are a ton of cautions in our cultural around pride.
At the same time, in my experience, pride is the most important measure of our success. It’s the guide I suggest people use in making decisions — I have these two options. Which one would make me more proud? That’s the one to do.
If I truly feel proud of myself, of the person I’ve been, there’s a deep peace and satisfaction that comes from that that you can’t get anywhere else. And if I’m not proud of myself, if I feel I’m being weak, fearful, petty, if I feel like a failure or a fraud, no amount of ex ternal success is going to bring me any real peace and satisfaction. And you hear examples of that all the time from famous, successful people.
The subject of pride came up for me again recently because of a fascinating interview I heard on the details, and I want to say ahead of time, this is not at all about politics, I promise, nothing to do with the election, started way before that, but the piece was about the details of the Russian campaign against us. It turns out, the Russians, for years have been working to intentionally cause strife and conflict in our society, just to weaken us as an adversary. It’s weird to think about that, because it seems so outrageous, but it’s well documented. There’s really no question about it.
But the fascinating part in this interview was how they did it. They started with pride. With actively working to boost people’s pride.
They identified a ton of different groups of all kinds, left, right, middle, not political at all. Just basically interest groups on Facebook and other platforms. And they went in and at first, just posted messages encouraging people to take pride in the group, in their identity. Let’s be proud of ourselves, what we’ve done, what we stand for.
And on its face, that’s great, right? I mean, we do make a difference. We are good people. We should feel good about ourselves.
But here’s the thing. And this gets to I think a good definition of good pride versus bad pride.
Good pride, and this is the kind I talk about in the book and the Academy, is when you feel proud because of a choice you’ve made, personally, internally. You had options. One was harder than the other. You took the harder one. You feel good about it. Man, I really wanted that Coke Zero today. Felt like I really needed it. And it was right there in the fridge. The pull was so hard. But I resisted. And I feel good about that.
That’s good pride. That is the pride you should try to create as often as possible. That is the feeling that will change your life like nothing else.
Think about this. Project yourself out to the end of your life, whether it’s when you’re 90 years old, or it’s tomorrow because something’s happened and you’re in the hospital, and it’s your last day. The only thing that will matter in that moment is am I proud of the person I’ve been, of the choices I made, of the love and support and example I’ve provided to the people in my life. That is it. It’s all about this kind of pride. Good pride.
The bad kind of pride is the kind that makes me think I’m better than other people.
When you look closely at the common “watch out for pride” messages in our culture, this is the kind they’re talking about. Arrogant. Entitled. Dismissive. You think you’re better than others. More worthy. More important. More moral. That’s the pride that creates problems, and that is what the Russian campaign was about.
First, the messages were, again, just about pride. Be proud. We’re great. All good. But after a while they would start to sneak in little messages about us versus them. We’re great. They’re less great. And then it would ratchet up from there.
So the real goal of their strategy wasn’t pride, pride was just the entry point. The real goal was to boost group identity and to create in-group versus out-group tension.
And, I’m not a social scientist, but I think you’d have to say that it’s working. I mean, there is so much group identity and tension in our country lately, for really, very little reason, when you step back and take a look. And to a great extent, it is the direct result of an intentional campaign to make it happen.
It’s crazy. And fascinating. And I hope we can figure out how to not be so vulnerable to this kind of manipulation.
But bringing it back to the pride question, is pride a problem? The answer is, it depends on which kind of pride you mean. If it’s group identity pride that makes us feel separate from and superior to others, yes, it’s a huge problem. One that we need to be aware of and work to resist. And the self-awareness and self-regulation skills from Raise Your Inner Game can be a real help with that.
If it’s a personal, inner pride that helps us be a better person, it’s the opposite of a problem. It’s a standard that can help us all make our lives better, and amke the world a better place.
So that is what was on my mind on the subject of pride. Pride is a great guide and goal for us. As long as we keep it focused on ourselves and our own inner choices rather than how we are different and supposedly better than someone else.
Let me know what you think about this. I imagine there are different opinions on this out there. In the comments, let me know how this strikes you. And again, no politics here. Not interested in debating any of that. Just this idea of the problems and the promise of pride. Okay? Would love to hear your thoughts.
All right. That’s it. Thank you. I’ll see you next time.
It seems like everyone says that you shouldn’t make New Year’s resolutions anymore, but I’m not sure I agree with that. I still find them helpful.
Now, some are better than others. You need to make ones that are likely to succeed. And for sure you need to have the skills and tools to follow through.
But if you can do that, they’re great. And that’s what I talk about in this week’s post: What I do in general and what I’m specifically doing right now to set myself up for a great year.
Enjoy!
SUMMARY
- The keys to making resolutions that work.
- The relationship between goals and your Inner Game.
- The core steps to starting the year on a good track.
- Listen/read to get the full message.
ENJOY THE PODCAST
HOT NEWS & DEALS!
1) Raise Your Inner Game hardcover is still available for FREE! Comes with a 6-week online training ($97 value) and a private student forum. Learn more and order your copy today at raiseyourinnergame.com! (The book is free. You pay $7 for s/h)
2) Limited Edition Raise Your Inner Game Medallion. Carry it in your purse or pocket. It’s an UP button for your Inner Elevator! Visit https://davidlevin.com/ryig/ to learn more and order yours. (FREE shipping!)
3) Check out our podcast, The David Levin Show. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-david-levin-show/id1401013964
WHAT I’M READING
FINISHED: The Redbreast by Jo Nesbo. Wow. Really hard to get into that one. Took me over a week to get going. And still had a hard time keeping track of the different names. Just too foreign. But ultimately did get into it, and finished strong. Couldn’t put it down for the last day or so.
FINISHED: All Systems Red. Martha Wells. Great new Sci Fi. Loved it from the first page. Short, though. Finished it pretty quickly.
CURRENT: Starting on the next in the series. Artificial Condition.
[ transcript ]
Hey, it’s David Levin. Author of Raise Your Inner Game, co-author QBQ, the Question Behind the Question, Founder of Raise Your Inner Game Academy.
We’ll start with a little housekeeping. Raise Your Inner Game ACADEMY for High School Athletes is coming along very well. Momentum is excellent. Planning to have some beta testers starting within the month. Super excited about that project.
The free Raise Your Inner Game hardcover offer is still available. Free book, free video training, just pay $7 shipping and handling. It’s a great opportunity to get started making just really a huge difference in your life. Go to davidlevin.com or raiseyourinnergame.com to take advantage of that.
If you haven’t subscribed to our podcast yet, The David Levin Show, would love to have you join us. Get these posts automatically in your podcast player.
And that is it, so here we go.
And it’s that time of year again. Resolutions time.
A lot of people tell you not to make resolutions, and that confuses me a little bit. I guess they say that because we tend to just make them and then break them pretty quickly, which causes sort of a downward spiral. We beat ourselves up for being weak and then are less likely to try other things in the future. And I get that, but I still sort of like them.
Now, I probably don’t make typical resolutions. I certainly don’t make plans for the whole year. No way to focus on something for that long.
But I do like looking at where things are, how they’ve been going, and setting some intentions for the coming year. I think that’s helpful.
Goals, in general, work for me, as long as they’re practical and measurable, and limited. Not just open-ended, like being more healthy. That’s never going to work. It’s too vague. But a good clear goal is super helpful. So my main goal coming up now is, and this is typical and boring, but I need to lose 10-12 pounds. For a bunch of different reasons.
The biggest thing for me, and weight is just a part of this, is to get my sleep and energy back in line. You might know, I’ve been having sleep issues the last half of this year, and it’s pretty likely that the extra pounds are a big driver of that. I’ve started snoring. Never used to do that. Had a sleep study done, I have moderate sleep apnea, which is frequently weight related. Again, totally new. And I’ve been trying to get used to the CPAP machine to help with that but I’m just not convinced that’s going to fix it, nor that I want it to. Meaning, I am not happy with the idea that I will need to use that thing for the rest of my life. To say the least.
So if I can go after the extra weight instead and that makes the difference, it’s like a triple win. I will feel a lot better being lighter, my sleep and energy will improve. And all of that will have a massive positive effect on my inner game.
This sleep thing combined with the weight, has added a real load to my overall gravity situation. It just makes everything harder. If you’ve read the book, that will make total sense. If you haven’t, you should get it. You’ll love it. Anyway, with the coming year, the things I want to get done, and the continued uncertainty in the world, it just feels like I need to be in better inner shape. Sort of like an athlete coming into the regular season. I feel like I need to get into game shape, internally, if that makes sense. It’s like, as the outer world gets noisier and more unsettled, I feel the need to strengthen my inner quiet to compensate for that, to enable me to stay connected and focused in spite of all that. And the CPAP, I’m sure it would help, theoretically, but it still sort of feels like putting a band aid on the problem.
Penn Jillette, if you know him, from Penn and Teller, comes to mind. He was weighing like 330 pounds at one point, had bad blood pressure problems. On a LOT of meds, and was going to need to stay on them forever. And of course, was still running the risk of it killing him. But one day his doctor said, Or you could just lose 100 pounds. And he was like, Oh. And so he did. Went on a crash diet Medically supervised. Lost over 100 pounds. And then he didn’t need any of the meds anymore. It sort of feels like that. And it’s just a better way to go.
So that’s my main focus coming up at the beginning of this year.
And I want to say, too, obviously, the health reasons and benefits for doing it are reason enough. But for me, it really ultimately is about my Inner Gravity. I could probably live with the weight gain if everything else felt like I want it to. I don’t love the look, but it’s not terrible, at least not yet. And at my age, you know, it’s not terrible. But my Inner Game situation lately is just not acceptable. It’s too hard to have the focus and energy I want, so that is what’s really driving it.
And I would suggest that that’s a good guide for you, too. The real driver of your productivity and success and happiness is always your Inner Game. So, if you’re able to operate at the level you want, that’s great. Keep doing whatever you’re doing. But if you’re not, you want to address that as directly and forcefully as you can. Your Inner Game is the most important thing, for virtually everything you care about.
One little detail on my weight project. I’m going to be better this time about paying more attention to my waistline than to my weight. I haven’t been good about that in the past, but weight on its own is just not a good indicator. Last Summer I had a great 30-day stretch of exercising every day, and have been pretty consistent with that ever since, so I added a good chunk of muscle mass. Which is great. But my sense of what I should weigh got thrown off, and that sort of threw me off track. I just didn’t know how to gauge what the scale was telling me, so I stopped paying attention. Which is sort of dumb, really, because I mean I was gaining weight. There was no question about that. But it just somehow make it harder to engage with it.
Anyway, I’ve taken my initial measurement now, and that will be the real goal this time. Smaller waistline. Pants and shirts fitting better. And hopefully hopefully, at some point, fix the sleep problem. But even short of that, I know I will feel a ton better just getting my appetite back in check, getting off carbs – because I always feel better when I do that – and of course, getting back off Coke Zero, too, getting the bad habits in control.
Part of me dreads it, to be honest, because I know what the struggle feels like. And my lower levels are not at all happy about it. I can tell you that already. I’m hearing from them. But the real me, my Level Four self can’t wait, because I know how much better it feels to be fully on track.
Anyway, that was an awful lot about me. But I hope some of it is helpful for you, as well.
Bottom line, I think it’s very helpful to take stock of how things are and to set goals and intentions for what adjustments you want to make, especially when the driver is the quality of your Inner Game, and you have the skills and tools to do it.
So, kick things off with a 30-day challenge. That’s what I’m doing. There’s nothing like it. Get back on track with your Focused Sitting and Impulse Control. Those are probably the highest leverage behaviors. Track your progress on your Tracking Sheet. I just set up mine for 2019. I have at least 4 years of sheets on file now. Incredibly helpful. And then just start doing it. One day at a time. Really, one Inner Game Moment at a time. Kick gravity’s ass. And feel the difference it makes.
Those are my New Year’s intentions for myself and I hope you have similar inspring goals for yourself. And I just wish you the best year ever. And I know with the Inner Game skills and tools, you can make it happen. You absolutely can.
So that is it for this week. Thank you. Keep up the good work. Happy New Year. And I will talk to you next time.
Do you ever have something coming up that you need to do, like get on a call or go to a meeting, but it is just the last thing you want to do?
This happens to me all the time, and I really do not care for it. :-)
But there’s a great skill I started sharing recently (It’s not in the book) that can really help with this.
In this week’s post, I tell you all about it. It’s my favorite kind of inner skill — super simple, makes a big difference.
Anyway, I am SURE you’re going to find this one helpful.
Enjoy!
SUMMARY
- The importance of mastering the transitions in our days.
- A simple skill that can make a remarkable difference.
- The three steps to “Clear the Desk.”
- Listen/read to get the full message.
ENJOY THE PODCAST
HOT NEWS & DEALS!
1) Raise Your Inner Game hardcover is now available for FREE! Comes with a 6-week online training ($97 value) and a private student forum. Learn more and order your copy today at raiseyourinnergame.com! (The book is free. You pay $7 for s/h)
2) Check out our podcast, The David Levin Show. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-david-levin-show/id1401013964
3) NOW AVAILABLE: Limited Edition Raise Your Inner Game Medallion. Carry it in your purse or pocket. It’s an UP button for your Inner Elevator! Visit https://davidlevin.com/ryig/ to learn more and order yours. (FREE shipping!)
WHAT I’M READING
FINISHED: Everything to Lose. Andrew Gross. Well done. Hard to put down. Lasted maybe three days.
Took a look at the Art of War. Classic. Thought maybe I’d be interested. Wasn’t. :-)
Now I’m reading The Redbreast by No Nesbo. Having a little trouble getting into it. Mostly related to my sleep issues, I think. My focus is just off. We’ll see how it goes.
[ transcript ]
Hey, it’s David Levin. Author of Raise Your Inner Game, co-author QBQ, the Question Behind the Question, Founder of Raise Your Inner Game Academy.
You ever have something coming up that you need to do, like get on a call or go to a meeting, but it is just the last thing you want to do?
This happens to me all the time, and I really do not care for it. :-)
Usually, the thing is, I’m working on something else. I have something else on my mind that I want to be working on, it’s important, I’m super wrapped up in it, and my energy just doesn’t feel ready to deal with the other thing, especially if it involves dealing with people.
I was scheduled to be on a couple of podcasts recently, and you know, that’s a good thing, obviously, I’m happy for the opportunity, want to do a good job, be articulate and present. Or at least as much as I ever can be in the morning. And to do that, I really need to spend some time and get myself into the proper state. I’ve got to get moving, physically, got to get my head into what we’ll be talking about, get my mouth connected to my thoughts so I can speak. It’s funny how much work that is, and how necessary it is for me.
But I was working on something else, I had a tech problem I’d been struggling with, trying to getting our membership site to talk to our email provider. It was driving me crazy and totally consuming my focus, and I really did not want to break out of that to prepare for these podcasts.
And this isn’t just with work. Sometimes at the end of the day, I’m really not ready to set things down and shift into family mode.
But you have to do it, right? You have to do it. For many different reasons, we need to be able to shift our focus and attention and energy as quickly and completely as possible from one thing to another. It’s the responsible thing to do it, it’s the grown up thing to do, and it makes a huge improvement in our effectiveness our productivity and just feeling good about what we’re doing and about our lives.
So I have this new skill I’ve started teaching that can really help with this. It’s in the Raise Your Inner Game Academy video course, it’s NOT in the book. But it’s a super simple technique you can use to improve your transitions. It’s called, Clear the Desk. And here’s how it works.
The desk is a metaphor for our inner state—our thoughts, our emotions and our physical Impulses. All three Levels we talk about in the book. So you picture your inner desk just like you can picture your actual desk.
And normally there are a lot of things on that inner desk, right? There are things on our mind. We’re feeling various emotions. Worried. Anxious. We have various physical things going on. We’re hungry, we’re tired. All kinds of things on our inner desk, pretty much all the time.
So, Clear the Desk means, as you come to a transition, you clear those things off and make room for what’s coming. So there are Three Steps to this.
Step One, you ask yourself, what’s on my desk? Meaning, what’s going on for me right now, what’s on my mind? What’s pulling at my attention? Physical, emotional, and intellectual.
So you observe that – what’s on your desk. And then Step Two is you clear it away. You file away all those thoughts and distractions. Most of them you can just put in the trash. Nope. Don’t need to think about that. Not going there. So you just shut down those thoughts. Some you’ll file away for later. Okay. That one, we’ll keep, come back to that later.
So you clear your desk—and you picture it in your mind, nice and clear and open.
And then Step Three, you basically just settle in. Okay. I’m Open. I’m here. I’m Ready.
That’s Clear the Desk. So to use this skill, that’s all you do. As you come into a transition, you take a moment, 15 seconds. 30 seconds maybe, do these three quick steps. What’s on my desk? Clear it Away. Open. Ready. Make sense? You’re going to love it.
So that is what I wanted to share with you today. Clear the Desk. It’s a great skill to help you improve all these transitions throughout your day. Try it out. Make a reminder to keep trying it out. I think you’ll really feel the difference this makes. It’s just a much more intentional way to move through your day, and it helps you feel much more in control and present and less overwhelmed. It’s a beautiful thing. It really is. I hope you enjoy it.
In the news this week, the free Raise Your Inner Game hardcover offer is still available. Pretty great. Free book, free video training, just pay $7 shipping and handling. Go to davidlevin.com or raiseyourinnergame.com to take advantage of that. Hard to imagine a better gift than to give someone the tools to raise their Inner Game. Just saying.
Also, this is just starting, but I a super excited about it. I am in the process of creating a new program, it’s mental performance training for high school athletes. It’s a beautiful application of the RYIG material. Very excited for the possibilities there. If you have high school age children in sports, or you know someone who does, or you coach high school sports, definitely keep an eye out for more on that. This is going to be a really great thing.
Other than that, that is it for this week. If you haven’t subscribed to our podcast yet, The David Levin Show, would love to have you join us there.
Raise Your Inner Game ACADEMY is currently closed. But you can get on the wait list at davidlevin.com.
Otherwise thank you. Keep up the good work. And I will talk to you next time.
Do you ever get into a period where there’s just too much going on, and you’re starting to feel truly overwhelmed — like, say, during the Holidays? :-)
I just had a rough couple of weeks that reminded me how hard this time of year can be for people.
So that’s what I talk about in this week’s post. It’s a few tips, from my perspective, on how to deal with periods like this as well as possible.
Enjoy!
https://davidlevin.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/12/holiday-stress-blog.mp3 SUMMARY
-
- Not so funny story of my “rough couple of weeks.” :-)
- Good discussion of the importance of a daily rhythm.
- Three suggestions for how to make the best of a rough period.
- Listen/read to get the full message.ENJOY THE PODCAST
HOT NEWS & DEALS!
1) NEW: Raise Your Inner Game hardcover is now available for FREE! Comes with a 6-week online training ($97 value) and a private student forum. Learn more and order your copy today at raiseyourinnergame.com! (The book is free. You pay $7 for s/h)
2) Check out our podcast, The David Levin Show. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-david-levin-show/id1401013964
3) NOW AVAILABLE: Limited Edition Raise Your Inner Game Medallion. Carry it in your purse or pocket. It’s an UP button for your Inner Elevator! Visit https://davidlevin.com/ryig/ to learn more and order yours. (FREE shipping!)
WHAT I’M READING To be honest, I’ve been reading a LOT of news. Which is an excellent sign of how rough it’s been. Not kidding.
Struggled a bit with Seth Godin’s book. I love him, but his long-form writing is starting to read too much like a string of short posts. Just can’t stay with it for some reason.
Did sneak in one book. Past Tense, by Lee Child. The latest Jack Reacher book. I have to say, it was a really good one. Literally could not put it down. Lasted about a day and a half.
But then it was back to the news. Yuck.
Now I’m considering Everything to Lose by Andrew Gross. We’ll see.
[ transcript ]
Hey, it’s David Levin. Author of Raise Your Inner Game, co-author QBQ, the Question Behind the Question, Founder of Raise Your Inner Game Academy.
Do you ever get into a period where there’s just too much going on, and you’re starting to feel truly overwhelmed, like sort of low-grade panic — like, say, during the Holidays?
So, I had a stretch the last couple weeks, I’m just coming off of it now, that really knocked me off my rhythm. It started back on November 7th when I drove 4 hours up to northern Minnesota to have a sleep study done. I’ve been having some fatigue issues for a while now and my wife, who’s a sleep doc, finally said, You know I’m listening to you sleep, and I think you should really get a sleep study. So I went up for that, and it was fascinating, but also exhausting. I don’t think they should even be allowed to call that a sleep study. I think lack of sleep study would be more appropriate.
So the next day, I’m absolutely toasted, I can hardly put a sentence together, and I have to fly out for a marketing conference. It’s going to be 4 days of noise, and talking, and disrupted sleep, diet, everything. So I go, and it’s great, but I don’t really get a chance to recover from that study. Really, the fatigue just gets worse. Then I get home but 4 days later I have to leave again fly out to LA to visit my Dad. 10 hour travel days. Three more days on the road there, again, interrupted sleep, food, exercise. Still not catching up. Coming home from that, I go straight to Minneapolis for a couple days for a big family Thanksgiving. Tons of people. More disrupted sleep, food, exercise. By the time I get home Thursday night at about 10:30, there’s just not much left.
And now the serious Christmas prep begins.
So, I know that’s nothing compared to what some people deal with, but for me, that was a rough couple of weeks, and the stress sort of compounds on itself because now, coming back I have a big list of things to get done, which is sort of overwhelming and stressful on its own, but my diminished capacity just adds to the stress of it. Not only do I have more things to do than I feel I can get to, but I’m not sure I’m able to handle them all in the first place.
So anyway, the point, believe it or not, is not to complain about my life, because even with all that, it’s still incredibly great. Super thankful pretty much all the time. But it reminded me how hard this time of year can be for people.
So I thought I would just share a few tips, from my perspective, on how to deal with it as well as possible. It’s going to be stressful. Whenever our rhythms get disrupted, it’s always stressful. And by the way, by rhythms I just mean that your days tend to have a consistent pattern to them. When you get up. Maybe a morning routine. Journaling. Sitting. Your work hours. Your evening activities, dinner, bedtime, etc. That’s your daily rhythm. And when you get into a period where you can’t do those things, you’re getting knocked off your rhythm.
Now a lot of people don’t have a consistent rhythm in their days to start with, and one of the best things you can do to feel better about your life is to start to build in more consistent rhythms. But even then, there will be times when they get disrupted, and the Holidays is a classic example, and it can be super stressful. But there are still some things you can do that really help.
So, number one is to find maybe just one or two elements from your regular rhythm that you CAN do even in the disrupted situation. For example, you’re on the road, in a hotel, you’re not sleeping your normal hours, not able to eat the way you normally do, but maybe you can still do some pushups in the morning or you can do your morning journal, or maybe do some focused sitting or get out for a walk in the evening.
Now, this will depend on what’s in your normal rhythm already, of course, but the idea is to at least keep hold of one or two NORMAL items that will remind you and connect you with your normal state. It’s sort of like a lifeline back to normal.
The second suggestion is related, but as you think about which elements of your normal routine to hold on to, give priority to the ones that are the most powerful for you. For me that is the sitting and especially getting some kind of a run in, if possible. Those are the things that most reliably make a difference in how I feel throughout the rest of the day. So if I can find any way to do those during a disrupted period, that is a very effective thing to do.
So with traveling, again, the sitting can be tough if I’m with my family, we’re all there in the same room, that’s a little weird, or if it’s a conference and I’m staying up late, sleep gets priority over sitting. So sitting is a little harder to keep up with. But I CAN frequently find some way to sneak in a run.
So I will make sure to bring my running clothes, even if I think it’s a long shot. I will do everything I can to find ways to exercise and it really helps. Again, it’s not full normal, but it’s a big piece of it, and it helps a lot.
Next up, of course, the Inner Game skills, Lifts and No Quiet will be super helpful in situations like this. Maybe even MORE helpful since so much else is out of whack. So again, just in the moment, whatever’s going on, just notice your thoughts, emotions, and impulses as they come up and engage with them intentionally. Nope, not going there. Not doing that. That will snap you right back to Level Four, which is so helpful, both in the moment and again in reminding you what normal looks like and feels like. And by the way, if those terms aren’t familiar, they’re from Raise Your Inner Game. So, get the book. You’ll love it.
And then the last one, and this is the biggest one probably, is to just give yourself a break. Go easy on yourself about it. You don’t want to have your guilt for having been knocked off track in the first place make the situation even worse. I mean it’s stressful enough already when you get thrown off your rhythms like this. It makes no sense to ADD to the stress by beating yourself up for it. But we definitely do it. Right?
You know you go into a situation like this and you intend to stay on track. You’ve got a plan, you think it might work. You’re optimistic. And of course most of the time it doesn’t. And what happens? Your big brain starts giving you a hard time about it. Man, you’re so weak. So lazy. Blah blah blah. Right? Gravity kicks in, trying to pull you down even farther.
But the reality is, there’s just not much you can do sometimes. These trips were a perfect example. There was just no way I could take these trips, and do what needed to be done there, right, spend the time, meet people, all that, and also keep anywhere near my normal rhythms. It’s just not possible. and the holidays can be just the same. It’s just not possible.
So rather then beat yourself up about it, the best thing is to just say okay. It’s fine. It’s okay to be off track now and then, if you need to. You can just roll with it, and get back on track when things get back to normal.
You know, my friend, Kim John Payne from Simplicity Parenting, says that the beautiful thing about rhythms is that they give you the freedom to break out of them now and then. You can go into a period like the Holidays and be fine because the rhythms are there when you get back to help you get grounded again.
This is sort of an odd association perhaps but another way to think of this is that it’s like trees. Trees bend in the wind. Right? The wind blows, they sway and bend back and forth. And because of that, they’re actually incredibly strong. If they didn’t have that flexibility, if they were brittle, they’d be weaker, they would break. But the flexibility is what ultimately gives them their strength.
So I think that’s another helpful way to think about these times when we get thrown off our rhythm. It’s okay to bend a bit with the situation. Yes, you want to stay on track as best as possible. Of course. But when you can’t, for whatever reason, the ability to flex and relax and roll with it actually makes you stronger and more resilient. You don’t have to be so frail and fragile and worried about getting thrown off your rhythm. You can just do what needs to be done and know that you can always bring yourself back when things get back to normal.
So I hope that’s helpful. Those are the things I do to make the best of disrupted per like this. I hold on to one or two things from my normal routine as sort of a lifeline back to normal. If I can, I hold on to the ones that are the most powerful for me. Again, for me, that’s running. And sitting. And finally, I try not to beat myself up for getting knocked off my rhythms in the first place. Sometimes it just can’t be helped.
All right. If you’d like to get these posts automatically, subscribe to our podcast, The David Levin Show. You can join our newsletter list at davidlevin.com to hear when these are released and hear about new trainings.
Quick reminder that the book, Raise Your Inner Game is available for FREE now. Just pay $7 shipping and handling, you get the hardcover book and a free online training. It’s a great offer, and a way to get started lowering your stress, making better decisions, working at a higher level. Check that out at raiseyourinnergame.com.
Otherwise, thank you. keep up the good work. I will talk to you next time.
Have you ever noticed how much harder it is to make a good decision when you’re under pressure?
This is a bigger problem than you might think, and it applies to all kinds of situations.
Anyway, that’s what I talk about in this week’s post. It opens with a funny (and embarrassing) story about a rafting trip I took down the Grand Canyon, but it’s a serious topic, especially for people who work in stressful, high-pressure situations.
Enjoy!
https://davidlevin.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/rafting-blog.mp3 SUMMARY
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- Funny story of my “awesome” Grand Canyon trip.
- Interesting discussion of the “spectrum of human behavior.”
- The key to making better decisions under pressure.
- Listen/read to get the full message.ENJOY THE PODCAST
HOT NEWS & DEALS!
1) NEW: Raise Your Inner Game hardcover is now available for FREE! Comes with a 6-week online training ($97 value) and a private student forum. Learn more and order your copy today at raiseyourinnergame.com! (The book is free. You pay $7 for s/h)
2) Check out our podcast, The David Levin Show. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-david-levin-show/id1401013964
3) NOW AVAILABLE: Limited Edition Raise Your Inner Game Medallion. Carry it in your purse or pocket. It’s an UP button for your Inner Elevator! Visit https://davidlevin.com/ryig/ to learn more and order yours. (FREE shipping!)
WHAT I’M READING
Took a week off. Got wrapped up in the midterms instead. Not recommended. :-)
Starting: This is Marketing. Seth Godin.
[ transcript ]
Hey, it’s David Levin. Author of Raise Your Inner Game, co-author QBQ, the Question Behind the Question, Founder of Raise Your Inner Game Academy.
Quite a few years ago, before we had kids, Margret and I went on a guided rafting trip down the Grand Canyon. Now, I am about the world’s worst outdoorsman, I really am, but that was an amazing trip. Unbelievably beautiful, thrilling. Memorable. Just one of the coolest things we’ve ever done.
And, this is an aside, but it reminds me why I get a little fussy about people using the word awesome all the time. Yeah, awesome. Oh that’s awesome. Not really. The Grand Canyon is awesome. It inspires a feeling of Awe. A huge feeling of awe. And that feeling is wonderful and rare and important. It brings perspective and connection and purpose into our lives in a very real way. So I think the word is sort of special and you shouldn’t just toss it around casually like so many people do now.
If someone does something nice, does a good job, that’s great. I love it. But it’s not awesome. It’s not a rare uplifting event. It’s just good. If I get a coupon for a free ice cream cone, really great. But again, awesome is not the word for it. The grand canyon is awesome. The milky way on a clear night. That’s awesome. Holding your brand new baby. That is awesome. So please, at least for me, if we could be a little more careful with that word, I would really appreciate it.
So anyway, we’re on a trip in the Grand Canyon. It’s awesome.
One day, during a lull, we were having a little water fight, one boat against the other. There were two big rafts on the trip. So it was just a friendly competition between crews.
And by the way, the water in the grand canyon, if you haven’t been there, is insanely cold. It’s funny thing — when you see footage of people shooting the rapids and you hear them screaming, I assumed it’s because it’s so fun and exciting. When I get there I realized they’re actually screaming because the water is so cold. It splashes up on you and it’s so shocking, you scream. Happened to me every time. It’s like heart attack cold. Just crazy.
So anyway, The battle begins. We’re having fun. people are screaming. Laughing. Splashing.
But all of a sudden, one of the women from the other raft jumps in the water, swimming toward us. Like she’s a pirate trying to board our ship. And I start sort of freaking out. “Oh my god. We’re under attack.” Like I’m really clicking into a different state.
So when she gets to our raft, I can still picture her there, she’s got one arm up on the side of raft, got her lifejacket on. Her hair is wet. She’s fairly petite. About my age. Just playing the game. Splashing some water on us. But I am not seeing this at all. I am feeling like we’re under attack. Repel the enemy!
So, I’ve got this big bucket, and I’m filling it with water, and I’m just slamming the water down onto her, on her head, in her face. She’s sputtering. Trying to get some air. It’s like I’m trying to drown her or something. It was just so outrageous and embarrassing. And dumb. I don’t know what I was thinking. I was taking it way too seriously.
It’s like that scene in the movie Dumb and Dumber if you’ve seen that. Harry, the Jeff Daniels character is out with Mary. It’s a little complicated, but anyway, they’re out in Aspen, having a fun time, doing various things around town. At one point, she tosses a little snow at him, poof on his jacket, no big thing. But he clicks into angry mode, like she’s attacked him. He winds up, whips a snowball at her full force, right in the face. Tackles her, starts grinding her face into the snow. It’s a hilarious scene. But that was me. It was SO embarrassing.
So I tell you that story because it illustrates what can happen when we’re under stress or in a high-pressure situation of some kind.
If you’ve read Raise Your Inner Game you know I talk about us having these four aspects of ourselves, like four levels of a building, going from low to high. Physical, emotional, intellectual and level four. And you can also think of these levels as a scale of human behavior, from low to high.
Humans have a wide range of potential behavior, from very primitive and animal-like at the low end to beautifully advanced and evolved at the high end.
Where we are on this scale varies from moment to moment, but when we’re under stress and pressure, we move down the scale. Our thinking and feeling and actions shift to a more primitive state. And the bigger the threat, the more primitive it gets.
And this doesn’t happen because we’re immature or we’re a jerk or we don’t care or anything like that. Honestly, it’s not our fault at all. It’s just the way our wiring works. We get triggered, we move down the scale.
The problem is, the farther down we go, the less clearly we’re thinking. And you can hear that in my story. I said, I have no idea what I was thinking. As we move down the scale our thinking gets more and more primitive until we really don’t even recognize ourself in it. It’s like, Who was that? What was I thinking? Right?
So that’s what happens normally when we’re under stress and pressure. We lose our ability to think clearly and to make good decisions. And the higher the pressure the worse it is.
Now, in my story with the water fight, it’s not that big of a deal. It’s just a funny embarrassing moment.
But for someone in a real pressure situation – emergency room doctor, law enforcement, military – this is a very big deal. At precisely the moment when we need to think the most clearly and operate at our highest possible level, every fiber of our being is pulling us in the opposite direction.
And this applies for the rest of us, too. Leaders, salespeople, parents – goodness. Definitely true for parents.
Any time we feel we’re under pressure or threat, whether it’s real or imagined, just normal every day stress, we get pulled down to a lower level, and we make bad decisions. We do things that hurt the outcome, that accomplish the opposite what we wanted. And it make us feel bad about ourselves.
You know, the point of the water fight was to connect with each other and have fun and get to know each other better and to bond. And it did not work out that way. And I felt like an idiot.
So, this is one of the biggest reasons to raise your inner game. The only way to keep this kind of thing from happening is to learn to break this instinctive link between trigger and response. To keep ourselves from getting pulled down this scale when we’re under pressure of some kind.
And that takes two things. First, we need to learn to notice it when it’s happening. To notice that downward pull. What it feels like. And ten second, we need to learn to resist it so we can stay fully present and make the best possible choices and decisions.
The good new is, it’s surprisingly easy to learn, and I say this all the time. But anyone can do it, and it is quicker and easier than you would imagine.
The bad news is, we will never be our best under pressure until we do. And again, it’s got nothing to do with our intent or our character. It’s just the way our system works. So we need to learn to break that cycle in order to be our best. Make sense?
So that’s the lesson here, for me. If you are frequently in a high-pressure situation, this is the best way to reduce your stress and make better decisions under pressure. Just learn the skills in Raise Your Inner Game.
And you can get the book now for free. Go to my site – davidlevin.com or to raise your inner game.com. Learn more there. The deal is, the book is free. Also comes with our Accelerator online training. You just pay $7 for shipping and handling. It’s a great deal, and you can start learning these powerful skills right away.
All right, that’s it for this week. If you’d like to get these posts automatically, subscribe to our podcast, The David Levin Show. Join our newsletter list at davidlevin.com to hear when these are released and hear about new trainings.
Otherwise, thank you. keep up the good work. I will talk to you next time.
I heard a teenager give a presentation recently about his struggles with anxiety and depression. It was very powerful and honest, and it reminded me of something I’ve been wanting to write about for a while.
It’s an idea that didn’t make it into the book, but I may try to work it into the next version, because it’s incredibly helpful—and something I’ve been sharing with a lot of people lately, even my grade school children.
Anyway, if you ever beat yourself up because of how you’ve reacted to something, this is for you.
This might be one to share with others, too.
Enjoy!
P.S. Big news! The hardcover of Raise Your Inner Game is now available for FREE!* More info in the post and at davidlevin.com
https://davidlevin.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/allergies.mp3 SUMMARY
-
- Powerful story of a teenager struggling with anxiety and depression.
- The simple shift in perspective that changed everything for him.
- A transformational idea for our daily mental health and happiness.
- Listen/read to get the full message.ENJOY THE PODCAST
HOT NEWS & DEALS!
1) NEW: Raise Your Inner Game hardcover is now available for FREE! Comes with a 6-week online training ($97 value) and a private student forum. Learn more and order your copy today at raiseyourinnergame.com! (The book is free. You pay $7 for s/h)
2) Check out our podcast, The David Levin Show. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-david-levin-show/id1401013964
3) NOW AVAILABLE: Limited Edition Raise Your Inner Game Medallion. Carry it in your purse or pocket. It’s an UP button for your Inner Elevator! Visit https://davidlevin.com/ryig/ to learn more and order yours. (FREE shipping!)
WHAT I’M READING
Finished: Kane and Abel by Jeffrey Archer. Oh boy. Started well but pretty soon I recognized his schtick. Painful from then on. Melodramatic. Simplistic. The good people are so good. The bad, so bad. Won’t make that mistake again.
Up next: Might wait for Seth Godin’s new one next week – This is Marketing. Might read Kennedy for the Defense. We’ll see.
[ transcript ]
Hey, it’s David Levin. Author of Raise Your Inner Game, co-author QBQ, the Question Behind the Question, Founder of Raise Your Inner Game Academy.
So, this might sound like a silly question, but does having hay fever make someone a bad person? No.
If you’re experiencing allergy symptoms yourself — sneezing, runny nose, all that — do you feel embarrassed by that, or are you ashamed of yourself for it? Again, I assume and hope, the answer is no. Of course not.
Seasonal allergies are annoying, but they have nothing to say about who we are as a person. Right? It’s just how our body reacts to certain things in the environment — pollen/dust/etc. And when the symptoms kick in, we don’t feel guilty about it. We just wipe our nose and move on. It’s nothing personal. Agree?
Okay, so what I want to suggest to you is that many of the things we do that we ARE ashamed of, that we DO believe say something about who we are as a person, many of those things should be thought of in exactly the same way. They’re not about who we are, they’re just how our system reacts to certain things in our environment – our emotional and mental environment.
Take me, for example. Last week I told a story about getting stuck behind a man using a walker and reacting internally like a bit of an impatient jerk. And again, I didn’t act out on it or anything. It was just some fleeting thoughts and emotions. But still, it’s not something I was proud of. It’s something I would like to be better about, and I talked about one specific idea for how to do that, which was to give myself more time between appointments. So I took the reaction seriously, I took ownership for it, and put some energy into how to improve it. And that’s what we should do. But what I DIDN’T do was beat myself up for having had the feelings in the first place.
The feelings of frustration and being judgmental are just how I react when I expose myself to the allergen, if you will, of running late. And the proof that it’s not really me is that if I give myself more time between appointments, I don’t have those feelings. You see? They only come up when they’re triggered by the situation.
That’s the shift I want you to make. I want you to depersonalize your thoughts and emotions and just think of them as allergic reactions, as just your system doing what it does.
I know this can be a tricky shift because it’s so different from how we normally think about this. But if you can do it, the idea is absolutely transformational for our daily mental health and happiness.
Here’s an illustration of that.
I heard a young man, a teenager, recently speaking about a rough period he’d come through, struggling with anxiety and depression. It was very powerful and honest. He said he had basically felt like he was just worthless. He had nothing to offer. He didn’t matter. Things just seemed pointless.
So he started seeing a therapist and she helped him see that all those thoughts and feelings he was having, were not really HIM, not the REAL him. They were just his adolescent brain doing what adolescent brains tend to do. Those kinds of thoughts are super common at that age, which is one reason suicide rates are higher in teenagers.
But he said, that core idea—that the thoughts weren’t coming from the real HIM—that shift made the difference.
That’s exactly what we’re talking about here. It’s actually the foundation of everything I talk about in Raise Your Inner Game. You have thoughts but you are not your thoughts, you have emotions but you are not your emotions, you have a body but you are not your body.
The more we can internalize that, and start seeing our reactions to things as just our system responding to triggers rather than as a mark against our character, the easier and happier life becomes.
I hope that makes sense. It is an incredibly powerful shift.
So that’s the main thing I wanted to talk to you about this week. See if you can’t start thinking about your negative thoughts and emotions as if they’re just allergy symptoms. There’s something in the air. My system is reacting. It’s nothing personal.
In the news this week, I am super excited to announce that the hardcover edition of my book, Raise Your Inner Game is now available for free! I’m not kidding.
So the deal is, I bought a bunch of books because basically, I want people to have them. The more I hear from people how it helps them, the more I want others to have it, too. So I’m giving away the books now. But I also want to make sure you get the most out of the book, so when you order, you also get a 6-week online training—the Raise Your Inner Game Accelerator. That’s normally $97 but I’m including that for free. AND you get 12 weeks of access to a private forum where you can basically ask me anything. It’s a pretty good deal.
Now, I say the book is free, along with the training and the forum, and they are. But to help me offset some of the costs so I can continue to offer this, I do ask you to pay $7 for shipping and handling.
So you get the hardcover book, the 6-week training, and the private forum, all for just $7 shipping and handling. Pretty great.
You can learn more about this and order your copy at my site, davidlevin.com or at raiseyourinnergame.com.
If you don’t have the book yet, this is a great chance to get it. There’s really no excuse anymore not to get this, if you’re at all interested in self improvement. It’s just a no brainer.
If you do have the book and have friends you think would be helped by it, it’s a great offer to tell them about. Again, just point them to davidlevin.com or raiseyourinnergame.com.
So that is it for this week. If you haven’t subscribed to our podcast yet, The David Levin Show, would love to have you join us there.
Raise Your Inner Game ACADEMY is currently closed. But you can get on the wait list at davidlevin.com.
Otherwise thank you. Keep up the good work. And I will talk to you next time.
Do you ever catch yourself acting like the kind of person you really don’t like?
Happened to me recently, and it reminded me of a simple (and easy) change that can really help.
It’s a pretty specific story, but the lesson can apply in a bunch of ways.
Enjoy!
https://davidlevin.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/kindness.mp3 SUMMARY
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- Quick story of a moment when I was, shall we say, not at my best. :-)
- The profound effect impatience can have on our state.
- A simple solution that makes a big difference.
- Watch/listen to get the full message.ENJOY THE PODCAST
HOT NEWS & DEALS!
1) NOW AVAILABLE: Limited Edition Raise Your Inner Game Medallion. Carry it in your purse or pocket. It’s an UP button for your Inner Elevator! Visit https://davidlevin.com/ryig/ to learn more and order yours. (FREE shipping!)
2) Free guide: “Three Things You Can Do Right Now To Start Loving Your Work (And Life) Again.” Visit davidlevin.com to get yours today!
3) Check out our podcast, The David Levin Show. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-david-levin-show/id1401013964
WHAT I’M READING
Finished: Inward, by yung pueblo. Met the author at an event, read the book overnight. He’s a big Instagram presence. The book is a collection of posts plus comments. Quite good, actually. Poetic. Very heart centered.
The Reckoning, John Grisham. Super disappointed with this. I love Grisham normally but this was very unsatisfying. Not recommended.
Next, sampling Kane and Abel by Jeffrey Archer. Have enjoyed other books of his. Cautious, though, because he can get a little soap-opera-ish.
[ transcript ]
Hey, it’s David Levin. Author of Raise Your Inner Game, co-author QBQ, the Question Behind the Question, Founder of Raise Your Inner Game Academy.
Do you ever catch yourself acting like the kind of person you really don’t like?
For example, an impatient jerk? :-)
Happened to me recently at the airport.
I was heading to my plane when I got stuck behind a man using a walker.
It only lasted for a moment, but I noticed myself getting frustrated, Come on, let’s go. You’re in my way.
I didn’t say anything, thankfully. But I felt it. And the funny thing was, I wasn’t actually in a hurry. I had plenty of time to make my flight. I just didn’t like having to break my pace. So I mentally lashed out at him. What the heck, old man. Get out of my way.
So stupid. And embarrassing.
Now, for some perspective. This was a tiny, fleeting moment. It was not a big struggle. And I would never act out in a situation like that, even it was a big struggle. I’m way too reserved and polite for that. So this is not me needing anger management training, or anything like that.
But it was interesting and helpful to observe the effect the moment had on me, and the kind of person I was being.
The appropriate reaction to someone struggling with a walker is compassion and kindness. Right? And maybe even admiration. That’s got to be a lot of work, both physical and emotionally. And what if it was my father? How would I feel then? What if it was ME, which it very likely could be at some point? How would that feel?
Bottom line, there was a ton of reality and humanity on display there, and I’d like to think I’m the kind of person who would be attuned to that. And much of the time, I AM that kind of person. But in that moment, I wasn’t. Right then, it was all about me.
So that was the big message for me. Being in a hurry, like I frequently am, turns me into the kind of person I really don’t want to be. It makes me insensitive. Judgmental. Childish. Arrogant. Entitled. Really, the OPPOSITE of who I want to be. So I’m going to be better about watching out for that.
And the solution, fortunately, or at least one solution, is incredibly simple. Just don’t schedule everything down to the minute. Give myself a little more time between appointments. If it’s something nearby, leave two minutes sooner. If it’s the airport, leave a half an hour sooner or even an hour sooner. It’s not like I’m that focused with all my time anyway. I waste plenty of time during the day. And I can always find things to do with the extra time once I’m there.
So that’s what I wanted to share with you today. Hopefully you’re not as susceptible to impatient syndrome as I am, but if you are, try giving yourself a little more time between appointments. Consider it an investment in your happiness. 2 minutes to lower your stress and be a kinder, more compassionate person. That’s a pretty good deal.
If you are hearing this somewhere other than my site, come on over—davidlevin.com. Grab the free download there—3 things you can do right now to love your work and life again. That’s an excellent piece. Plus it gets your name on my newsletter list, so I can let you know about new posts and offers when they come out.
Also check out the podcast – David Levin Show. Love to have you subscribe and join me there. Been hearing good things from people on that.
Raise Your Inner Game ACADEMY is currently closed. But you can get on the wait list at davidlevin.com.
Otherwise thank you. Keep up the good work. And I will talk to you next time.
If you’ve ever had to communicate with someone (?!), especially if you’re a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) this post is for you!
It’s a fascinating and wide-ranging interview with Rob Ashton, founder and CEO of Emphasis / Writing-Skills.com.
Rob and I have been friends for several years now, and he’s the one who turned me on to the idea of HSPs a couple months ago.
I invited him on to go deeper into that subject, and we do, but we also spent a lot of time on communication, which was great because that’s his superpower—and it’s a favorite subject of mine, too.
Anyway, it’s a little longer than I planned, but I thought it was a great conversation.
Enjoy!
P.S. This is my first interview on the podcast. You might be able to tell. :-) Had a great time, though. Rob was a good sport.
TOPICS
- Definition and traits of a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP)
- How high-sensitivity relates to leadership and communication
- The surprising difference between written and verbal communication
- Communication tips and insights
- Listen to hear the full interview.
ENJOY THE PODCAST
SHOW NOTES
– Rob’s site: Emphasis / https://www.writing-skills.com
– Twitter: @Robert_Ashton
– HSP website: https://hsperson.com
– HSP book: https://www.amazon.com/Highly-Sensitive-Person-Thrive-Overwhelms/dp/1559723505/ref=tmm_hrd_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1539804671&sr=8-5
HOT NEWS & DEALS!
1) Free guide: “Three Things You Can Do Right Now To Start Loving Your Work (And Life) Again.” Visit davidlevin.com to get yours today!
2) NOW AVAILABLE: Limited Edition Raise Your Inner Game Medallion. Carry it in your purse or pocket. It’s an UP button for your Inner Elevator! Visit DavidLevin.com to learn more and order yours. (FREE shipping!)
3) Check out our podcast, The David Levin Show. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-david-levin-show/id1401013964
WHAT I’M READING
Finished: The Miracle Strip. Nancy Bartholomew. Fun book! Thriller. Main character is a stripper. Smart, funny, fresh. Makes me smile thinking about it.
Paul Simon, the Life. Robert Hilburn. Not a fun read. :-) Fairly dry. Didn’t love the writing. But I do love Paul Simon, big time. He’s simply the best writer there is, in my opinion. And of course, there’s a lot of pure talent that went into that. But it turns out there was more grit and persistence involved than I would have thought. Anyway, can’t say I recommend it. But I sure enjoyed it.
Current: Holy Ghost. John Sandford. Virgil Flowers is one of my all-time favorite characters. All these book are just a blast. Funny. Insightful. Honest. I love them. Highly recommended.
Someone asked me this recently, “What specifically happened in that ‘Wizard of Oz Moment’ that made such a difference for you?” and it got me thinking that I’d left some important details of the story out of the book. :-)
Seriously though, it’s the details that helped me see how the Inner Game really works. Possible they’ll be helpful for you, too.
So, that’s what this post is about.
Enjoy!
https://davidlevin.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/oz-blog-1-2-18.mp3
SUMMARY
- The “startling” observation that changed everything for me.
- What it has to do with the Wizard of Oz. :-)
- Why it’s essential to understand the Inner Game mechanism (or any problem you’re trying to improve).
- Watch/listen to get the full message.
ENJOY THE PODCAST
HOT NEWS & DEALS!
1) Raise Your Inner Game ACADEMY, the ultimate Inner Game training is NOW OPEN! Learn more and register at http://davidlevin.com/academy-info.
2) Check out our podcast, The David Levin Show. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-david-levin-show/id1401013964
3) Free guide: “Three Things You Can Do Right Now To Start Loving Your Work (And Life) Again.” Visit davidlevin.com to get yours today!
4) NOW AVAILABLE: Limited Edition Raise Your Inner Game Medallion. Carry it in your purse or pocket. It’s an UP button for your Inner Elevator! Visit DavidLevin.com to learn more and order yours. (FREE shipping!)
WHAT I’M READING
Just finished The Saboteur, by Andrew Gross. Rough start, with all the Norwegian names, and not consistently great writing, but ultimately, couldn’t put it down. Recommended, and an interesting piece of history. (It’s based on a true story.)
Next, sampling ‘Lake Success’ by Gary Shteyngart. Not sure yet if I’ll go all in.
[ transcript ]
Hey, it’s David Levin. Author of Raise Your Inner Game, co-author QBQ, the Question Behind the Question, Founder of Raise Your Inner Game Academy.
In the introduction to Raise Your Inner Game, I tell the story of my Wizard of Oz moment, which is when I finally saw how the inner game really works, and because of that, started turning my life around. And the main lesson in the story, which is essentially the same one Timothy Gallwey talked about in The Inner Game of Tennis, and Eckhart Tolle talked about in The Power of Now, is that there are essentially two people inside of us, and that the other person is not really on our side. :-)
But I had someone ask me recently, “What was it about that moment that made you see that?” and I realized that the book doesn’t really tell the whole story. It gives you the take-home message, that there’s something else in there, in your inner world working against you. And that is the important piece. But the details of the story are what helped me see it. So I thought maybe I should share more of the details here, to do a better job of helping you see it. Because as I’ve said many times, this observation is the foundation of raising your inner game. The more clearly you see this, the more power you have over it.
So, as you remember, the situation was that I was on a diet, in part because I was sort of addicted to Coca Cola. So the first goal of the diet was to break that, and it worked. I got off the Coke, and had been for a few weeks at the time of the story, this was back in 1992. (It’s sort of funny now, to hear myself say “it worked” considering I’m still struggling with it 25 years later, but I guess that’s the nature of addiction.)
Anyway, a few weeks into the diet, I noticed I was now starting to be addicted to weighing myself. There was that moment I talk about in the middle of the day when I thought, “I wonder what I weigh right now” even though I’d already weighed myself that morning and the night before. That was the trigger event.
So, what I saw in that moment that got this whole thing started was that the pull I felt toward weighing myself was exactly the same as the pull I felt toward having a Coke.
Now, it wasn’t the same in content. In the one case, I felt a pull to have a Coke and then started hearing arguments that it was okay to do that. In the other, the pull was to weigh myself, with arguments that that was okay. So, the arguments were different, but the form of it—the structure, the experience, and mechanism—was the same.
And so that’s what I saw. Because of the similarities in the two experiences, my attention shifted to what they had in common and I saw how the inner game really works. It’s this mechanism of the pull and the arguments. And once I saw that, I saw it everywhere. This is how the inner game works. And if you’ve read Raise Your Inner Game, you know this is the foundation of that material.
And the reason that’s important and so powerful is because when you know how something works, you can figure out how to affect it, how to change it. And until you do, you really can’t.
The comparison I like to make here is with the germ theory of disease.
Before we understood how disease spreads, we had all sorts of crazy ideas for how people got sick and for how to prevent it. We thought for a time that it was bad vapors in the air from decaying swamps and cesspools. So the solution was to avoid those smells and locations. I never knew this but the reason the doctors back then wore those creepy looking masks with the long noses is because the noses were stuffed with aromatic herbs to keep the bad smells away. Obviously not going to work right? We know that now. But we didn’t then.
Another belief was that illness was the result of imbalanced humours in our body, there were supposedly four different kinds of substances in our bodies and when they got out of balance, we got sick. So this belief led to the treatment of blood letting, so you would drain a person’s blood to get the humors back in balance. Again, not effective. And sort of disgusting. But that’s what happens when you’re working with bad information. When you don’t know how something works, you can’t really know how to change it.
But as soon as we figured out how disease spreads, now we were able to come up with effective treatments. Wash your hands. Boil your water. In many cases, the solutions are incredibly simple. But you will only find them when you understand how things work in the first place.
So it’s the same with your inner game, and that’s what happened with me. Once I saw how it works, I started to be able to manage it. It really was that simple. And that’s what Raise Your Inner Game is about, both the book and the Academy. Part one is understanding how it works. Part Two is the skills and tools to control it.
So the next question is, what does this have to do with the Wizard of Oz? Why do I call it my Wizard of Oz moment?
It’s because, in that moment, when my attention shifted to seeing the mechanism, it felt like I was seeing another person, like that famous scene with the Man Behind the Curtain. I assume you know that reference. I’d thought things worked one way, but all of a sudden, I saw what was really going on. It had that same sort of shocking, startled feeling to it. Who is that? Where did he come from? What’s he doing here?
That’s also why I connect it to the stories Timothy Gallwey and Eckhart Tolle tell. Gallwey’s big Ah Ha moment was noticing his tennis students beating themselves up for a bad performance and thinking, “Wait, who are they talking to? There are two people in there.” Tolle’s story was he was in a deep personal crisis, he had the thought “I can’t live with myself any longer” and suddenly clicked, “Hey, there are two people in that statement. I, and the person I can’t live with.”
It’s exactly the same experience I had.
Now, I don’t think of it in terms of another person anymore. Though honestly it can still feel like that at times. But now I think of it as the inner game mechanism, and that it’s just a natural part of how our system works. But at first, again, it really did feel like there was someone else in there, someone who had surprising power over me, but now that I’d seen that, taken away the mystery, I was going to be able to get the power back, just like in the movie.
So that’s why I call it my Wizard of Oz moment, and that’s what I really saw that changed my life from then on. I hope that makes sense. I hope it’s helpful. It was the beginning of everything for me. And it’s the foundation of raising your Inner Game.
And this is one of the big reasons the book, and especially the Academy can be so transformational. With the exercises, and the quizzes in the Academy, and the chance to ask questions and connect with people in the forum, you really do have a chance to experience this for yourself. And you just will not believe the different it makes in your life.
So that’s it for this post. My Wizard of Oz moment, the rest of the story.
If you are hearing this somewhere other than my site, come on over—davidlevin.com. Grab the free download there—3 things you can do right now to love your work and life again. That’s an excellent piece. Plus it gets your name on my newsletter list, so I can let you know about new posts and offers when they come out.
Also check out the podcast – David Levin Show. Love to have you subscribe and join me there. Been hearing good things from people on that.
Of course, the launch of the Academy is still going on this week, depending on when you hear this. Please check that out. DavidLevin.com. Links there. It’s a crazy great training. Nothing like it anywhere.
Otherwise thank you. Keep up the good work. And I will talk to you next time.
This is a mystery to me: There’s an inner game skill that’s every bit as important and powerful as cognitive control, but virtually no one talks about it.
I honestly don’t know why. It’s possible that it’s because they don’t think we can do anything about it, but if so, they’re wrong about that. We definitely can, and it makes a huge difference in our lives when we do.
In any case, that’s the subject of this week’s post.
Enjoy!
https://davidlevin.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/09/secret-weapon-blog.mp3 SUMMARY
- The “secret” inner skill that’s every bit as powerful as cognitive control, but that no one talks about.
- The profound emotional benefit that cognitive control simply can’t provide.
- How to develop this important inner skill.
- Watch/listen to get the full message.
ENJOY THE PODCAST
HOT NEWS & DEALS!
1) The ACADEMY is OPEN! Registration is now open, and there’s a special $100 off launch offer, available through 10/5/18. Learn more and register at http://davidlevin.com/academy-info.
2) Check out our podcast, The David Levin Show. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-david-levin-show/id1401013964
3) Free guide: “Three Things You Can Do Right Now To Start Loving Your Work (And Life) Again.” Visit davidlevin.com to get yours today!
4) NOW AVAILABLE: Limited Edition Raise Your Inner Game Medallion. Carry it in your purse or pocket. It’s an UP button for your Inner Elevator! Visit DavidLevin.com to learn more and order yours. (FREE shipping!)
WHAT I’M READING
Finished the Hellfire Club. Good enough. :-) Not much more to say.
Finished the Fixer by Bradley Tusk. Loved it. SO interesting and entertaining. A non-fiction page turner. How often can you say that? Highly recommended.
Started FAME by Justine Bateman. Loved it, but it’s pre-order. Also, it’s crazy expensive. $27, for an ebook. Never seen anything like it. Not sure what’s going on there. Hopefully it’s a typo, because I will not pay that much.
Sort of floundering around right now for something to read, otherwise. :-) Will let you know what I settle on.
[ transcript ]
Hey, it’s David Levin. Author of Raise Your Inner Game, co-author QBQ the Question Behind the Question, Founder of RYIG Academy.
I made a big point last week about the importance of cognitive control to your inner game, and it really can’t be overstated. When you can learn to direct and control your thoughts and attention, especially when you can shut them down and free yourself from them when you need to, it literally transforms your life, and in the very best ways.
But the more time I’ve spent working with the Raise Your Inner Game material, I’ve come to understand that impulse control, another of the core Inner Game skills, is equally important.
And that’s sort of a shocking discovery because ALL the other conversation about this topic—self-mastery, mindfulness—is all about cognitive control in one form or another.
Daniel Goleman’s book, FOCUS, was all about this, very explicitly. When you hear meditation teachers and advocates — Sam Harris, Dan Harris, the Headspace people — the focus is on stilling your thoughts and breaking free from this endless loop of thinking we get stuck in. It’s pure cognitive control. Eckhart Tolle, when he speaks of presence and moving “above thought”, it’s the same idea.
And I don’t mean to diminish it in any way. Cognitive control is incredibly powerful and important. But this one-sided focus on it misses the fact that impulse control can do the exact same thing—help us be more present and mindful—but it also helps in areas that cognitive control can’t.
So let me give you an example of this.
You’re in a meeting. The idea is to be present and pay attention, of course. But the reality is that your thoughts are elsewhere. You’re checked out, thinking about other things. The cognitive control solution is to notice your drifting thoughts and pull your attention back to the meeting, and it works. It brings you right back into the moment.
But how about this? You’re in the same meeting, but this time you get the urge to check your phone. The urge is not a thought, it’s more of an unconscious physical desire. You feel the pull, you reach for your phone. But the effect is the same—your attention goes elsewhere. So, if you can observe the impulse and resist it, it has the exact same effect as doing that with your thoughts. It brings you back into the moment.
You see? For the purpose of staying focused and present in the moment, impulse control is every bit as powerful as cognitive control.
It’s also every bit as necessary, because we are distracted by our impulses just as much as we are by our thoughts. But nobody talks about this, and when we focus only on the cognitive control aspect of our Inner Game, we miss a huge part of the problem, and a huge opportunity for improvement.
Because here’s the thing that impulse control does that cognitive control alone simply can’t, and this is really important: Developing impulse control gives a huge boost to our self-esteem.
Most of the things we do that make us feel bad about ourselves have to do with impulse control, or, a lack of impulse control. We get angry and say things we regret. We spend money that we really shouldn’t. We eat things we know we shouldn’t, and we eat when we shouldn’t.
Now, we tell ourselves we’re not going to do these things, but in the moment when the impulses arise, we give in, and we end up feeling ashamed of ourselves for it.
But as you develop impulse control, you’re able to make better choices in these moments. You’re able to control these unconscious drives. So, not only do you get the instant benefits of being present in the moment, you also start to feel better about yourself as a person, which for many people, myself included, is the most important thing to how they feel about their lives.
So hopefully I convinced you in the last post to work on developing cognitive control. Now I want to add impulse control to your list. It’s easy to do. At a practical level, the work is very similar to cognitive control. And it just makes a huge improvement in your life. I can’t say enough good things about it.
As far as how to do it, no surprise, I suppose, but Raise Your Inner Game ACADEMY is the best training available for it.
It’s totally clear, the tools are practical and easy to use. It’s just crazy effective for developing and strengthening impulse control. The book touches on it, too, but I go much deeper in the Academy on this than I do in the book. It’s one of my favorite things about the Academy compared to the book.
And also, to be clear, you don’t necessarily need training to do this. It’s such a simple skill, you can just start doing it. Start noticing impulses when they arise, and practice resisting them. It really is about that simple. But if you do want help and training, the Academy is the absolute best way to go. There’s nothing like it anywhere. It will help you like nothing else you’ve done. So I encourage you to give it a look. DavidLevin.com, links are there to the information page. Everything you need to know is right there.
So that’s what I wanted to talk about in this post. Yes, of course, work on cognitive control for all the reasons we’ve talked about. But don’t stop there. You also want to work on impulse control. It is the surprising secret weapon of raising your inner game.
If you prefer listening to these posts in your podcast player, check out our podcast, the David Levin Show. iTunes. Google play. Been hearing great things from people about the show. Would love to have you subscribe to that.
If you’re not on our newsletter list, you can sign up for that at davidlevin.com, too, so I can let you know about new posts and trainings when they come out.
Otherwise thank you. Keep up the good work. And I will talk to you next time.
I see this problem a lot: People are into self-improvement, and they’ve tried various things, but they’re still struggling. The worst part? They think it’s their fault (it’s not). The real problem is that our instincts focus us on the problem rather than the solution. But it’s easy to fix.
Anyway, that’s what this week’s post is about.
Enjoy!
https://davidlevin.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/09/cog-control-blog-1.mp3
SUMMARY
- The real reason one can be into self-improvement but still struggling (it’s not what you think.)
- Great examples of focusing on the problem rather than the solution.
- Why you should continue to work on cognitive control, even if you’ve already read RYIG.
- Watch/listen to get the full message.
ENJOY THE PODCAST
HOT NEWS & DEALS!
1) The ACADEMY is OPEN! Crazy. More on that coming soon, but you can check it out now at http://davidlevin.com/academy-info.
2) NOW AVAILABLE: Limited Edition Raise Your Inner Game Medallion. Carry it in your purse or pocket. It’s an UP button for your Inner Elevator! Visit DavidLevin.com to learn more and order yours. (FREE shipping!)
3) Free guide: “Three Things You Can Do Right Now To Start Loving Your Work (And Life) Again.” Visit davidlevin.com to get yours today!
4) Check out our podcast, The David Levin Show. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-david-levin-show/id1401013964
WHAT I’M READING
Okay, back to reading. Finished “Texas Ranger” by James Patterson. Started it because it was Patterson, but barely finished. Pretty bad, honestly. Not recommended (unless maybe you’re a country music fan, which I’m not.).
Starting “The Hellfire Club” by Jake Tapper. Pretty good so far. Also started “The Fixer” by Bradley Tusk. Non-fiction, but very interesting. Would still be reading that but it was a pre-order. Next, for sure.
[ transcript ]
Hey, it’s David Levin. Author of Raise Your Inner Game, co-author QBQ, Founder of Raise Your Inner Game Academy.
So, here’s a problem I see a lot. I wonder if you see this, too. Someone will be into self-improvement. They’ve tried various things – they read books, they go to seminars, they try meditation. And all those things are good, but their lives, inside, haven’t really changed much. The core struggles that made them want to improve in the first place are still there. They’re still beating themselves up all the time – doubts, worries, fears, insecurities. They’re still not taking care of themselves like they know they should. They’re still having trouble staying focused and getting things done, they feel like they’re behind all the time, distracted, stressed out. They get upset, they have a heard time shaking it. Life is just a lot more struggle than they think it should be, and the various self-improvement things they’ve tried haven’t helped with that.
So I know why that is. And I know it’s NOT what people tend to think it is, which is that there’s something wrong with them, right? That’s the saddest part of this. That really is what people think, and they tell me that. I tried meditation, as one example. Couldn’t make it work. Just something wrong with me, I guess. That is super sad, and it’s totally incorrect.
The reason we can try so many different things and still be struggling is not because there’s something wrong with us. It’s because none of those things teach the skills that directly address our core struggles.
I’ve talked about this before, a lot, actually, because it’s one of foundations of Raise Your Inner Game, but the core skills we need are primarily cognitive control, but also emotional self-regulation and impulse control. And virtually none of the self-help material available teaches you how to develop those skills. They just don’t.
So anyway, I wanted to talk about the primary skill again today, cognitive control, because I’m just reminded lately that it really is the most important and powerful and fundamental inner skill, and we just don’t think in those terms. Even people who’ve read the book, our natural reaction is to focus elsewhere. Here are a few examples of that.
Say you’re a busy mom with too much on your mind. Stressed out, running behind all the time, having trouble sleeping. Just too much, too much to think about. We think the answer is to have less to think about—to check things off that list, make some space in our days. But that never happens. The list always has new things on it. And the truth is, even if there were less things on the list, you’d still find something to worry about. Right? So the answer is not to somehow have less things to think about, it’s to learn to shut the thinking off now and then. To just take a mental break and quiet your thoughts. And that is Cognitive Control. You direct your thoughts, you turn them off when you need to. Can you imagine? It’s an incredible relief, for one. But it also makes you more effective when you turn them back on.
Another is when you’re working on a sticky problem at work, you’ve got something you’re trying to figure out, you’re looking for creative ideas, and they’re not coming. You’re struggling. Instinctively, we keep pushing and bearing down on the problem. But that doesn’t generally work. It keeps us stuck in the same mental track, and usually just gets us more frustrated and confused.
Creative ideas emerge from our subconscious. When we get locked up in our thoughts it keeps us from seeing them when they come up. It’s sort of like white noise blocking out the background sounds. So the real solution is not to bear down harder, but to quiet your thinking and listen for the new ideas that bubble up. And this again, is pure Cognitive Control. You’re directing your thoughts to be still just for a moment and listening for what comes up.
If you are a Highly Sensitive Person an HSP, which is something I’ve just started to be aware of, you get overwhelmed by being around people sometimes, by noise, by stimulation of various kinds. The instinct is to withdraw and isolate and protect ourselves from all the input. And for short periods, that does help. We do need to get away from that now and then. But after a while, it just makes us more vulnerable and leads to more isolation, which is not the way we want to live. We need to be in the world in order to be happy and to make a difference in the world. So the answer is not to isolate, it’s to learn to manage our reaction. When our instinct says “pull away” we can say, “no, let’s try this instead.” Again, Cognitive Control.
So, over and over again, we see that our instinct is to focus on the apparent problem — our crazy to-do list, a sticky problem at work, too much stimulation, whatever it is we’re struggling with — our attention goes THERE, when the solution is actually somewhere else. It’s in being able to control our thoughts and emotions and impulses.
That’s really the greatest trick that gravity plays. It gets us focused on our apparent problems versus the actual solution.
But when you keep your focus on these core skills instead, all your struggles get easier.
So I really encourage you to do that. Keep working on these core skills. Keep thinking about and noticing how your thoughts and emotions and impulses come up and affect you. The more you do that, the better you get at not falling for gravity’s big trick. Even when things are at their craziest, you can always keep your head and stay focused on what’s important. Or at least you can get back there as quickly as possible.
If you’ve read the book, Raise Your Inner Game, read it again. There’s way more in there than you probably realize. If you haven’t read it yet, and this is sounding familiar, you probably should. It will help you more than probably anything else you’ve done. And that’s not boasting. It’s a statement of the power of these skills. You should also consider the advanced training, Raise Your Inner Game ACADEMY. The more time you spend with this material, and the more you internalize it, the more it will help you. I hear that over and over. And I imagine you can come up with your own ways to keep it in your mind and to incorporate it into your daily life, as well.
But however you do it, it’s important to do because again, our instincts are not our friends in this. We tend to look to the apparent problem, but the solution is in the skills.
So that’s what I wanted to talk about this week. A gentle but firm sort of reminder to stay focused on cognitive control. It really is the key to being your best and to reducing life’s struggles.
In the news, the Academy is officially open for registration. Super excited about that. Been a LONG time coming, and it really is a great program. I’ll be saying a lot more about this in the coming weeks with the big initial promotion. But you are going to love this training.
If you are hearing this somewhere other than my site, come on over—davidlevin.com. Grab the free download there—3 things you can do right now to love your work and life again. That’s an excellent piece. Plus it gets your name on my newsletter list, so I can let you know about new posts and offers when they come out.
Also check out the podcast – David Levin Show. Love to have you subscribe and join me there. Been hearing good things from people on that.
Otherwise thank you. Keep up the good work. And I will talk to you next time.
Do you ever get frustrated with all the distractions that come at you on your computer while you’re trying to work on something?
If so, I’m sharing my favorite tips for dealing with that in this week’s post, plus a couple of other shortcuts I love.
FYI, these are Mac-centric. I don’t know the equivalents on Windows, but I assume they exist.
In any case, check out my “magic keystrokes.” If you don’t know these shortcuts already, I think you’ll find them very helpful.
Enjoy!
https://davidlevin.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/09/keystrokes-blog.mp3
SUMMARY
- A simple productivity hack to block out distractions and stay focused.
- The importance of making uninterrupted time for thinking.
- Another super helpful Mac tool (you likely aren’t taking full advantage of).
- Watch/listen to get the full message.
ENJOY THE PODCAST
HOT NEWS & DEALS!
1) Check out our podcast, The David Levin Show. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the-david-levin-show/id1401013964
2) Free guide: “Three Things You Can Do Right Now To Start Loving Your Work (And Life) Again.” Visit davidlevin.com to get yours today!
3) NOW AVAILABLE: Limited Edition Raise Your Inner Game Medallion. Carry it in your purse or pocket. It’s an UP button for your Inner Elevator! Visit DavidLevin.com to learn more and order yours. (FREE shipping!)
WHAT I’M READING
Still on my reading break. And reading WAY too much news in its place. So, nothing good to report. Sorry. :-)