Mom Enough: Parenting tips, research-based advice + a few personal confessions!: Recent Episodes
mother-daughter co-hosts Dr. Marti Erickson & Dr. Erin Erickson
Dr. Marti Erickson, developmental psychologist and her daughter Dr. Erin Erickson, women’s health nurse practitioner and specialist in maternal-child health, use research-based information and a few personal confessions as they and their guests discuss what it means to be “mom enough.”
How can parents raise children who care about their communities and want to make a positive difference? Dr. Anne Klaeysen shares practical strategies for helping kids develop strong values, civic responsibility and ethical leadership. Learn how children can become engaged citizens, contribute to a more humane society and build the skills needed to create meaningful change throughout their lives.
Mom Enough® celebrates 20 years in this special live episode, as Dr. Marti Erickson and Dr. Erin Erickson are interviewed by Way to Grow CEO Coco Du. Together, they reflect on decades of research and parenting insights. They explore how strong family support helps parents be “good enough,” creating the consistent, connected relationships children need to grow and thrive.
From winning championships to studying parental behavior in youth sports, psychology professor Dr. John Tauer sees youth sports from both the court and the field of social psychology. In this conversation, he challenges overparenting in athletics and explains how dialing it back can better build character, resilience, teamwork, and lifelong skills.
Consent isn’t just a “teen talk,” it starts in the everyday moments we barely notice. Should kids have to hug relatives? Is “just playing” still okay when someone gets pushed too far? In this episode of Mom Enough, Marti and Erin are joined by Christy Keating (former prosecutor turned parenting coach) for a practical, eye opening conversation on boundaries, digital risks, and raising kids who can confidently say – and respect -- “no.”
As much as we’d love to make life easy for our children, they inevitably will experience stress. And, as research demonstrates, some stress is positive, allowing children to build coping skills and resilience. But toxic stress can undermine our children’s long-term health and wellbeing. So what protects children, and what makes stress more damaging? Join Marti and Erin of Mom Enough® for an essential conversation with Dr. Megan Gunnar about what the science of stress and resilience means for children.
Feeding babies and toddlers doesn’t have to feel stressful or filled with guilt. In this episode, pediatric feeding specialist and speech-language pathologist Jordyn Koveleski Gorman shares what truly matters when starting solids, navigating picky eating and food refusal, and building a healthy relationship with food from the very beginning.
Andrew Rowland bring decades of experience supporting families in these situations. They offer the practical guidance you and your family need to navigate next steps with confidence and care.
Though they are a normal part of early child development, tantrums can feel overwhelming, unpredictable, and stressful for parents. In this episode, early childhood expert Sara Reichstadt of Kinderberry Hill shares why children have tantrums and what parents can do about it. Tune in for practical, compassionate strategies parents you can use in the moment, and after a tantrum ends.
Therapeutic Services discuss how parents and teachers are essential to helping children build these critical skills for learning and life.
s Developmental and Therapeutic Services discuss the high rates of expulsion among preschool children and the toll that takes on both children and their families.
s. Listen as early childhood educator Candice Daulton challenges popular myths about school readiness and highlights what kids really need.
Psychologist and author Dr. Michael Reichert draws on personal loss, his extensive research from around the world, and years of clinical experience to show how boys often lose their emotional voices and intimate connections too soon. In this episode, he offers parents practical insights on how to raise a boy, from the lively toddler years through fostering connection, resilience, and healthy growth.
Clara Garner, soon-to-be American University graduate, shares her college search journey, including successes, regrets, and lessons learned. She offers insights from her own experience and other students on class size, grading, location, and happiness factors. Clara also discusses internships, international work, and three key steps to choosing the best college fit.
Why is parental involvement in school so important? Sheila Williams Ridge, Director of the Shirley G. Moore Laboratory School at the University of Minnesota, joins Marti and Erin of Mom Enough® to discuss parental involvement in their child's school. She highlights the many different ways parents can be involved and the benefits of this for children and families.
Do you have a young adult child who is heading off to college? Or even a high-schooler who is planning for college? Are you wondering what to do about money management as they prepare to go off on their own? Founder & President of Share Save Spend®, Nathan Dungan discusses top priorities for helping college-bound young adults proactively and successfully management their finances. He also highlights important information about loans and credit cards, and has suggestion that parents can implement now to ensure their future (or current) college student has the knowledge they need to be smart with money.
How do you feel when you get a big hug from a friend you haven’t seen for a while? Or how about a spontaneous kiss on the cheek from your child? Dr. Michael Banissy, a psychologist and neuroscientist, has spent his career studying different types of touch and the impact on health, wellbeing and relationship quality in all kinds of relationships at every stage of development. He joins this Mom Enough episode from England to share some of his most important and interesting findings.
When you think of "masculinity," what comes to mind? Tough guys who don't cry or show vulnerability? Or who can't wait for the next football game and a beer? This week's podcast takes a deeper look at "authentic masculinity" and how we can all support boys and men in becoming who they truly aspire to be. Tune in for Dr. Keith Edwards’ message of hope and compassion.
With the rapid pace of technology and an abundance of information – and misinformation – it can be challenging to know the best way to handle digital behavior. What should parents really worry about when it comes to teens and screens? And what can we do if we feel like we’re losing the battle around screen time? Erin Walsh breaks down what’s going on in your teen’s digital world, and why brain development is key to navigating screen time, online safety, and your relationship with your teen.
When you lose your cool when your toddler misbehaves or your teen botches a major exam, what do you say to yourself? If you’re like many parents, you probably slip into all-or-nothing thinking – saying to yourself, “I’m a terrible parent!” In this Mom Enough® episode, Dr. Elizabeth Lombardo offers a different approach. She shares practical ways to step back and put our failures into perspective. Tune in to learn how to use these opportunities to evaluate, reframe, quiet our inner critic, and grow.
Are you a parent of a child who hopes to go to college in the next few years? When and how should you start talking about types of schools, locations, requirements, and cost? And what do you need to discover about your child before you even think about specific colleges? Dr. Pamela Ellis discusses “The Right Fit Formula” for finding a college for your child in this episode of Mom Enough®.
A bump, a slip, or a tumble on the playground can be common events in a child’s life. However, sometimes these events, or other accidents, can result in a more significant injury, such as a traumatic brain injury (TBI). It’s important for everyone to know what to do and where to turn for help. Tune in to this episode to learn more about traumatic brain injury (TBI), including how these injuries happen, the symptoms and long-term effects, and what treatments are available.
Do you struggle to keep the spark in your relationship since becoming a parent? Sometimes the exhaustion and stress of parenthood really zap the romance out of your relationship. But a strong, happy marriage is good for you and good for your kids. So, how can we ensure our love stays strong after parenthood? Marriage and family therapist Dr. Bill Doherty shares tried and true advice on keeping the love alive in this episode of Mom Enough.
You might have heard the phrase "serve and return" as an important way of interacting with a baby or young child. But what does that look like in everyday situations and why is it so central to a young child's longterm development? Dr. Megan Gunnar, professor in the Institute of Child Development at the University of Minnesota, discusses how small things matter to every aspect of a child's learning and wellbeing.
Do you know a young child who shows little empathy or emotional connection with others and maybe doesn't even seem upset upon getting caught for hurting another child? How do you think a child develops these callous - unemotional traits at such an early age? And what can parents and other caring adults do to help this child develop kindness and compassion toward others? Tune in as Dr. Nick Wagner talks about research he is leading on this important and challenging issue.
Many of us, both adults and young people, report feeling worn down and powerless in the face of the conflict, tragedy and heartache that are so prevalent in our communities and the world today. So, what can we do to feel more engaged in creating solutions? Michael Thatcher, CEO of the nonprofit Charity Navigator, brings a message of hope and empowerment about how giving to others – of time, talent and/or treasure – becomes a lasting gift to ourselves and our children.
Most of us spend hours a day looking at screens. But how often do we consider the effects of all this screen time on our brains? Dr. Richard Cytowic discusses the science of how our brains are affected by digital overload. He highlights screen time’s effect on focus, cognition, and emotional health, and offers practical advice for managing digital distraction. Tune in to learn how to protect your brain and your health from the constant pull of digital devices and find balance in the screen age.
Mom Enough Co-Host Dr. Erin Erickson discusses mind-body skills, simple strategies to use them, and the science behind them in this episode. Parenting can be stressful, but simple techniques like breathing and mindfulness can support your own wellbeing while also setting a positive example for your kids. And, it's easy to teach your children these skills at any age, giving them valuable tools for living a calm, happy, and fulfilling life. Tune in to learn more about the skils & the science!
What lessons have you learned from your parents that shape your own parenting today? Tune in to this interview with Andre Dukes, Vice President Family & Community Impact at the Northside Achievement Zone. With over 20 years of experience supporting Black fathers, Andre discusses how early parenting lessons and societal expectations influence our roles.He emphasizes the value of "little moments" in strengthening relationships with our children and invites listeners to reflect on their own parenting journeys.
When navigating conflicts with teens, parents often feel unsure of how to connect. In this episode, conflict resolution expert (and trained hostage negotiator) Karleen Savage outlines essential skills for navigating conflict: curiosity, attitude, master listening, connection, and reframing. She explains how approaching disagreements with curiosity can lead to deeper understanding, while a supportive and empathetic attitude sets the tone for productive dialogue. By mastering listening and making connections, parents can turn conflicts into opportunities for growth. Tune in to discover how to strengthen your parent-teen relationship through these powerful and practical conflict resolution skills.
When parents learn that their child has special needs, what are common feelings and questions they have? And, for friends and extended family, what are sensitive, respectful ways to help? In this powerful final episode of a 3-part series, staff of St. David's Center, one a mother who walks this journey herself, speak candidly of things that help children and families thrive in the face of great challenge.
When your child is struggling developmentally, how can your pediatric healthcare provider help identify the problem and determine next steps? How do you find the best provider to be your partner in getting the help and support your child needs? Dr. Rachel Bies brings helpful guidance in Part 2 of Parenting When Your Child Struggles, brought to you by St. David's Center for Child and Family Development.
Are you the parent of a child who has been diagnosed with a special need or is struggling with some aspect of development? Is this causing stress in your relationship with your spouse or co-parent? If so, you’re not alone. Vanessa Slivken, licensed marriage and family therapist and Executive Director at St. David’s Center Minnetonka Site, brings valuable information on how parents can become effective partners in parenting when their child is struggling.
Join us for an insightful episode featuring Lindsey Cormack, Associate Professor of Political Science and Director of the Diplomacy Lab at Stevens Institute of Technology. Lindsey, an expert in political engagement and author of How to Raise a Citizen (And Why it’s Up to You to Do It) and Congress and U.S. Veterans: From the GI Bill to the VA Crisis, joins us to discuss the pivotal role parents play in shaping the next generation of engaged citizens.
As children, many of us said to ourselves, “When I’m a parent, I’ll never do that to my kids!” And yet, here we are, doing exactly what we said we’d never do. So, how can we reflect on what we want to carry forward and what we ought to leave behind? And, what narratives underlie those automatic behaviors? Nathan Fink joins Marti & Erin to discuss parenting narratives and how reflection can be a path to build new and healthier ways of parenting.
Do you have a young adult child who is heading off to college? Or even a high-schooler who is planning for college? Are you wondering what to do about money management as they prepare to go off on their own? Founder & President of Share Save Spend®, Nathan Dungan discusses top priorities for helping college-bound young adults proactively and successfully management their finances. He also highlights important information about loans and credit cards, and has suggestion that parents can implement now to ensure their future (or current) college student has the knowledge they need to be smart with money.
Sara Reichstadt, Director of Education at Kinderberry Hill, shares her expertise on how to teach kids math by making math an enjoyable and integral part of your child's daily life. Discover fun and engaging ways to incorporate math into everyday activities, and learn how to foster a positive attitude towards learning math in children. Whether you're looking to strengthen your child's math skills or inspire a lifelong love for learning, this episode is packed with valuable insights and practical tips you can use today.
Many dads struggle to find their role in caring for the baby and supporting mom through the early days & nights of a child’s life. And, sometimes we moms send messages, subtle and not-so-subtle, that dad can’t measure up to our standards of care. But, in the long run, everyone will win (mom, dad, child) if dad is fully engaged as a caregiver. Andre Dukes of the Northside Achievement zone joins us to discuss why dads matter in child development and what we all can do to help men be the dads their children need.
In this episode, Susan Beaulieu, an Anishinaabe woman and Healing Justice Director at NDN Collective, shares her personal journey of overcoming trauma and Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) and highlights the power of traditional Indigenous practices. She discusses how her understanding of trauma and healing has evolved over time, deeply influencing her work and parenting. Tune in to gain wisdom on integrating mind-body medicine and to hear valuable insights for parents and caregivers.
Have you had one of those moments when you said the wrong thing to your child? Perhaps a time when you were angry and didn't communicate effectively? The reality is, sometimes we're just not in the state of mind to communicate effectively. Tune in as William Stixrud, PhD, discusses how to talk with your children, including how to increase the likelihood your child will actually hear you and how to help your child understand themselves and find their own reasons to change.
Have you had one of those moments when you said the wrong thing to your child? Perhaps a time when you were angry and didn't communicate effectively? The reality is, sometimes we're just not in the state of mind to communicate effectively. Tune in as William Stixrud, PhD, discusses how to talk with your children, including how to increase the likelihood your child will actually hear you and how to help your child understand themselves and find their own reasons to change.
Hear about the benefits of the Autism Mentorship Program (AMP) in this episode with Emily Goldberg, founder of AMP, and Uma Oswald, a dedicated mentor within the program. They illuminate the significance of this program in nurturing understanding and support for youth with autism. Emily shares how her own autistic twin boys sparked the idea for AMP, while Uma provides insights into the transformative power of mentorship for both the mentor and mentee. Don't miss this inspiring episode!
If a baby or young child is identified with a neurological problem that affects learning or behavior, what are the possibilities for minimizing those effects as the child develops? This week’s Mom Enough guest, Dr. Jed Elison, brings research that supports the power of early intervention, an encouraging message for children and families everywhere.
How much time do you and your children spend outside in nature? And if your answer is “not much,” what benefits are you missing? Dr. Cathy Jordan joins Marti & Erin to discuss the latest science on how nature experience contributes to health, happiness, learning, and stewardship of our planet. Tune in – and then get ready to get the whole family, babies to grandparents, out into nature!
Are your children getting the kind of reading instruction that has been shown to be most effective? If not, what can you do to change that? And why is it important? A wealth of research has provided clear evidence that direct instruction in core skills is key to reading success. Yet many publishers, school districts, states and even university education departments have not fully embraced the shift to direct instruction of phonics and phonemic awareness. Tune in to Marti & Erin’s conversation with Dr. Casey to learn why that is – and to hear what you can do as a parent – to make sure your child and all children are developing the building blocks of reading that they need in order to succeed in school.
Delve into the world of sober mothering with Celeste Yvonne, a certified recovery coach and writer. She unravels the intricacies of mommy wine culture, and shares invaluable insights and suggestions for the "sober curious" or those who think they may have a problematic relationship with alcohol. Gain insights on supporting mothers, quitting drinking, and why mothers are drinking more than ever.
Dive into gluten-free with Dr. Julie Miller Jones, PhD, as she unravels the science of gluten, wheat allergy, and celiac disease. Get expert insights on who should follow gluten-free diets, the differences between wheat allergy and non-celiac gluten sensitivity, and practical advice for managing celiac disease. Join us for a captivating episode filled with valuable information for a healthier, gluten-conscious lifestyle.
Are you concerned that your child only says a handful of words, while your friend’s child speaks in sentences? Or do you think your child struggles too much with making friends or managing emotions? Or maybe you believe your child’s development is right on track, but wonder how you can be sure. Tune in for the answers you need, brought to you by Help Me Grow.
This 3-part series on parental mental health focused first on ways parent and child mental health are inextricably connected and, second, on postpartum depression and anxiety and the impact on the parent-infant relationship. But what about individuals who are parenting even as they struggle with Severe & Persistent Mental Illness (SPMI)? Two St. David’s Center therapists illuminate what can help both parent and child navigate the unique challenges of parenting with SPMI.
Feeling depressed or anxious in the early months of parenting is not uncommon. But when those feelings are serious and persist beyond a few weeks, consequences can be significant for parent, baby and the whole family. This episode brings hopeful guidance on recognizing postpartum depression, supporting parent and baby, and seeking effective parent-infant treatment as needed.
Explore the landscape of digital equity with Comcast's Broderick Johnson. Learn about digital equity solutions, including free & low-cost internet, Lift Zones, telehealth innovations, and actionable steps you can take for closing the digital gap. Join the conversation and get involved in ensuring your community has the access they need!
What does “mental health” really mean – what does it look like in daily life? And how are the mental health of a parent and a child connected? In this first of a 3-part series on parental mental health, an expert from St. David’s Center for Child and Family Development lays the foundation for what we all should know about how to support optimal mental health for parents and children.
Sara Reichstadt of Kinderberry Hill Child Development Centers delves into the nuanced ways smartphones and technology affect family life. Unpacking the unintended consequences and the positive and negative impacts on a child’s development, this episode moves beyond the typical discourse on screen time. Tune in as Sara shares practical tips and guidance for fostering a mindful and intentional relationship with technology in your family.
Novatus (Nova) Marandu, Executive Director of Toa Nafasi, shares his story of abuse as a child and highlights the important work that he is doing with Toa Nafasi to protect child rights and prevent child abuse. Tune in to learn more, and to hear how you can get involved.
If we think about the kind of friend, spouse, care provider, boss or public leader we want, we probably would name empathy as an essential quality. Empathy encompasses seeing through another’s eyes (cognitive empathy), feeling what that person feels (emotional empathy) and taking action that is attuned to that person’s feelings (compassionate empathy). But how does someone become empathic? At what age are children first capable of empathy? And what is the role of parents and other adults in nurturing empathy as children develop? In this episode of Mom Enough, Dr. Megan Gunnar, professor in the University of Minnesota’s Institute of Child Development, joins Marti & Erin to discuss early signs of empathy in infancy, the growing capacity for compassionate empathy in the toddler period, and simple, practical ways parents can encourage and expand children’s empathy in everyday interactions at every stage. Nurturing empathy is one of the most important things we can do to help our children grow up to be the kind of people we hope they will be. And it is one powerful way we can be leaders in making the world a better place for all! Thank you to Mom Enough’s longtime supporting partner Help Me Grow for bringing this episode to you. IN WHAT WAYS ARE YOU NURTURING EMPATHY IN YOUR CHILDREN?Thinking of children in your family, when did you first notice signs of empathy in them? What have you done (or could you do) to help them develop and use what Dr. Gunnar calls “compassionate empathy”? And what steps can your whole family take to deepen your empathy toward all, even people who seem different from you in background, experience or beliefs? WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT EMPATHY?❉ THE DANISH WAY OF PARENTING: AN INTERVIEW WITH JESSICA JOELLE ALEXANDER. Denmark has frequently been ranked as one of the happiest countries in the world. It is a culture that celebrates togetherness and hygge (cozy conviviality), teaches empathy, and believes children should have a voice and be respected. All of these factors play a part in how Danes parent. Tune into this Mom Enough episode with Jessica Joelle Alexander, best-selling author of The Danish Way of Parenting: What the Happiest People in the World Know About Raising Confident, Capable Kids. ❉ HELPING CHILDREN BUILD EMPATHY: A DISCUSSION WITH UNSELFIE AUTHOR, MICHELE BORBA. When people ask author and educational psychologist Michele Borba what kids need to be successful and happy, she confidently proclaims, “Empathy!” And yet, our popular culture, with its emphasis on “I” and “me” seems to fly in the face of empathy as a core value. We’ve all seen kids and adults alike constantly snapping “selfies” to document their every move. What other factors have contributed to these changes? And, most importantly, what can we do now as parents, teachers and other caring adults to make sure children build this important quality of empathy from the earliest years? Dr. Borba joins Marti & Erin for a rich discussion in this Mom Enough episode. Tune in to hear her practical strategies for putting empathy front and center in your child’s life and in the life of your whole family. ❉ RAISING FEMINIST BOYS: DR. BOBBI WEGNER DISCUSSES GENDER, SEX & EMPATHY. Psychologist and author, Dr. Bobbi Wegner joins Marti & Erin for a compelling conversation on the importance of teaching our children — and especially our sons — about sex, consent, identity, gender, and empathy.
Many of us cringe when we think about our early adolescence and the emotional ups and downs of middle school or junior high, as it used to be called. We may recall being teased or bullied or inexplicably dropped by someone we thought was our best friend forever. Or perhaps we recall insensitive or downright cruel things we said or did to others. (Did you ever write nasty comments in a “slam book”? Or get tearful when you saw what someone wrote about you?) To what extent is the social world of middle school still the same for today’s young people? And how might our own memories inadvertently shape our children’s experiences, for better or worse? Bestselling author Judith Warner has a fascinating new book on this complex topic, And Then They Stopped Talking to Me: Making Sense of Middle School, and joins Marti & Erin for a rich and personal discussion of those ever-timely issues! WHAT COMES UP WHEN YOU THINK OF MIDDLE SCHOOL?What are some of your strongest memories of your middle school (or junior high) experience? How did those experiences shape your confidence, determination and emotional well-being, both positively and negatively? What did you learn from those experiences and what do they lead you to say and do to support your children in navigating that time of opportunity and challenge in their own lives? WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SUPPORTING YOUR MIDDLE-SCHOOLER?❉ THE POWER OF THE TEENAGE BRAIN: AN INTERVIEW WITH PSYCHIATRY PROFESSOR AND AUTHOR, DR. DAN SIEGEL In this conversation with Marti & Erin, Dr. Siegel debunks common myths of adolescence, illuminates exciting changes in the teenage brain and offers practical tips for parents and teens. ❉ CHALLENGES & OPPORTUNITIES: WHAT BRAIN DEVELOPMENT SCIENCE TELLS US ABOUT HELPING ADOLESCENTS THRIVE, Dr. Laurence Steinberg, a well-known author, has spent decades studying adolescents and has arrived at a much more positive view of what he terms The Age of Opportunity (the title of his latest book). He joins Marti & Erin for a rich and hopeful discussion of how recent research on adolescent brain development can inform the ways we guide our teens to a healthy, happy, productive adulthood. Mom Enough® is a participant in the Amazon Associates Program, which means we may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. Your purchase helps Mom Enough continue to offer evidence-based information at no cost to our listeners.
Award-winning Minnesota author, Shannon Gibney, joins Marti and Erin Erickson of Mom Enough® for a captivating discussion on her latest book — a speculative memoir of transracial adoption. The Girl I am, Was, and Never Will Be masterfully weaves together the story of Gibney's life as a transracial adoptee with an imagined tale of her life had she not been placed for adoption. The resulting braided story brings to light the unique and often painful challenges of being a transracial adoptee, and adds to the public discourse on adoption in a beautiful way. Shannon Gibney gives voice to the complex emotions experienced by adoptees and explores the "cultural losses" associated with being a transracial adoptee. She gives listeners an inside perspective into her writing process and how this book affected her as a mother. Tune in to this moving and fascinating conversation and learn more about Gibney's incredibly creative memoir and personal story. WHAT WAS MOST IMPACTFUL TO YOU IN GIBNEY'S STORY OF TRANSRACIAL ADOPTION? How can people make sense of their lives when there are gaps in their knowledge about personal, family, or ancestral history? What might you imagine as an alternate reality to your life now or in the past, or your family history? How might the process of imagining a different story for your life help you better understand your life now? WANT TO HEAR MORE ON ADOPTION?❉ MOTHERHOOD SO WHITE: A DISCUSSION ON RACE, ADOPTION, AND PARENTING IN TODAY’S WORLD. As a single Black woman who chose to become a mother through adoption, author Nefertiti Austin took to writing her own experiences in her critically acclaimed memoir, Motherhood So White: A Memoir of Race, Gender and Parenting in America. Tune in to this Mom Enough episode as Austin shares her moving and empowering journey to and through motherhood. ❉ A BIRTH MOTHER’S STORY OF LOVE, HOPE & RESPECT THROUGH OPEN ADOPTION. When Christine Bauer was an 18-year-old college student just beginning pursuit of her educational goals and life dreams, she didn’t expect to confront what she refers to as “those three words” – “You are pregnant!” Now, decades later, Chris has used Those Three Words as the title of an eloquent book that tells the story of her choice to place her baby for open adoption and the remarkable relationships that have developed over the years among everyone involved. You will be touched by this hopeful story of love and choice.
As a Social Work professor, Oliver Williams has devoted his career to helping men find the strength, compassion and self-control to treat their partners and children kindly and respectfully. With a special focus on African American men, Oliver works with local communities and national and international organizations to reduce domestic violence and support positive fathering. In this warm and thoughtful conversation with Marti & Erin, Oliver draws on his work and, even more, his personal experience with his father (who died when Oliver was 16), the older brother who became a father figure to him, and son Samuel, who, for 26 years, has been the light of Oliver’s eye (and mom Sonia’s). We thank Oliver for helping us remember and celebrate the fathers in our lives! WHAT STANDS OUT TO YOU WHEN YOU THINK OF FATHERS?What are some of your strongest childhood memories of your father (or a father figure if you didn’t grow up with your father)? How do you think your children will answer that question when they are older? WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT FATHER'S & FATHERHOOD?❉ DADS MATTER: THE ROLE OF THE FATHER IN CHILD DEVELOPMENT AND WHAT MOMS CAN DO TO HELP DADS SUCCEED. Andre Dukes of the Northside Achievement Zone in Minneapolis, joins Marti & Erin to discuss the role of the father in child development, the benefits of father involvement throughout a child’s life, and what we all can do to help men be the dads their children need. ❉ BETWEEN FATHERS AND DAUGHTERS: A CONVERSATION WITH AUTHOR AND RESEARCHER DR. LINDA NIELSEN. A wealth of research highlights the importance of fathers to the development of both sons and daughters. Yet many women say they don’t really know their fathers very well and/or they often feel criticized by their fathers. In situations of divorce or separation, these issues often are even more pronounced. But, as Linda Nielsen knows from her research on the relationship of fathers and daughters, there are steps adult daughters can take to put their relationship with their fathers on a more positive path. And, dads, whether your daughter is a toddler, teen or adult, you can build a closer more supportive relationship with her. However the father-daughter relationships play out in your family, you will find this Mom Enough discussion insightful and encouraging!
How do you feel when you get a big hug from a friend you haven’t seen for a while? Or how about a spontaneous kiss on the cheek from your child? Or your spouse holding your hand when you go for a walk? How do you imagine your child experiences the way you touch them, and what do you remember about your own experience of touch when you were a child? Dr. Michael Banissy, a psychologist and neuroscientist, has spent his career studying different types of touch and the impact on health, wellbeing and relationship quality in all kinds of relationships at every stage of development. He has pulled together a wealth of information in his engaging new book, Touch Matters: Handshakes, Hugs, and the New Science on How Touch Can Enhance Your Wellbeing. He joins this Mom Enough episode from Bristol, England to share some of his most important and interesting findings with Marti & Erin – and you! WHY IS TOUCH SO IMPORTANT TO WELLBEING?To what extent do you experience positive touch, and with whom? What would you change about that if you could? How about in your childhood, especially with your parents? How do you think touch helped shape the kind of relationship you had with your parents? What do you want to do the same or differently with your own children? Why? WANT TO LEARN MORE?❉ THE BENEFITS OF ROUGH AND TUMBLE PLAY: A CONVERSATION WITH EDUCATOR MIKE HUBER ABOUT ROUGHHOUSING. Early childhood educator Mike Huber from St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development (a supporting partner of Mom Enough), understands how valuable rough and tumble play is to children’s learning and development. He joins Marti & Erin in this Mom Enough® episode for a lively discussion of this often overlooked aspect of children’s experience, prompting funny memories for Marti & Erin and inspiring them to do a little roughhousing themselves. ❉ TOUCH MATTERS. Check out Dr. Michael Banissy's latest book.
In our fast-paced, technological world, it's essential that our children have the skills they need to succeed. Science, Technology, Engineering and Math (STEM) are key learning areas in the early years. STEM develops a child’s inquiry, exploration, and natural curiosity, and these skills foster life-long learning. There are many ways families can enhance STEM learning at home. Watch this Mom Enough Live episode with Sara Reichstadt of Kinderberry Hill Child Development Centers and Mom Enough Co-Hosts, Erin and Marti Erickson, to learn what STEM learning looks like, why it's important, and how you can integrate it into your child's daily life. Tune in to Mom Enough Live Episode 13 for a discussion on STEM learning in early childhood with co-host, Drs. Erin and Marti Erickson, and guest expert, Sara Reichstadt, of Kinderberry Hill Child Development Centers. Get tips on supporting STEM learning at home.Erin Erickson & Marti Erickson | On Our Minds - Columns & Videos by Mom Enough & Guests |STEM LearningAbout the HostsDr. Erin Erickson is a maternal child health specialist and nurse practitioner, dual-certified in women’s health and family practice. She has extensive experience speaking and writing on topics related to parenting, maternal-child health, and mindfulness. In addition to her graduate studies in nursing and public health, Erin has a Master of Arts in integrative health and wellbeing coaching and works as a health coach for parents and students (from high school through graduate school). As a wife and mom, Erin is living most of the issues addressed on Mom Enough. Dr. Marti Erickson served as the founding Director of the Children, Youth & Family Consortium and, more recently, as director of the Irving B. Harris Programs and co-chair of the U of M President’s Initiative on Children, Youth & Families. Marti specializes in linking research, practice and policy in the areas of parent-child attachment, child abuse prevention, and children’s mental health. Since retiring from the University in 2008, Marti continues to speak and consult extensively throughout the U.S. and abroad, with an emphasis on strategies for addressing the needs of young children and families in high-risk circumstances. WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ KINDERBERRY HILL CHILD DEVELOPMENT CENTERS. Want to learn more about Kinderberry Hill or get helpful resources from their experts in child development? Explore their site and don't miss their resources page for helpful tips and ideas you can implement at home. ❉ MOM ENOUGH LIVE: LOOSE PARTS PLAY WITH EVERYDAY OBJECTS. As playtime technology expands, have we moved further away from what kids really need to develop their minds? Are everyday objects a better option than high-tech toys? We turned to the experts at Kinderberry Hill to learn more about loose parts play — or how you can use the empty box, the old buttons and other found and upcycled objects to optimize your child’s development. Watch this episode of Mom Enough Live to learn more! Dr. Erin Erickson & Dr. Marti Erickson are here to support you on your parenting journey. Mom Enough® shares evidence-based information for parents and people who care for children and families. If there is a topic that you want us to address, send us a note and we will do our best to get you the information you need. Click here to sign up for our weekly newsletter to stay up-to-date with our latest podcasts and articles.
Adolescent sleep patterns represent a change from earlier childhood. Gone are the days of "early to bed and early to rise." Adolescents tend to stay up later and, if allowed, sleep in. The quantity and quality of sleep a person gets is important to health, safety and well-being at every age. But recent research highlights the unique sleep needs of adolescents and the high cost when those needs are not met – from poorer school performance to depression to greater risk of car accidents and more.
Kyla Wahlstrom, Senior Research Fellow at the University of Minnesota, has studied this issue for more than 20 years, including a recently completed 3-year study with the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. She joins Marti & Erin for a lively discussion of what parents can do to ensure adolescents get the sleep they need and to make the case for why later school start times are an important part of the equation.
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT ADOLESCENT SLEEP PATTERNS? What did you learn in this Mom Enough interview about how and why later school start times (after 8:30 am) are so important for adolescents? If your district has early start times and is not likely to change them, what steps can you and your family take to improve the amount and quality of your children’s sleep?
WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ START SCHOOL LATER. Check out this coalition of health professionals, sleep scientists, educators, parents, students and concerned citizens dedicated to increasing public awareness about the relationship between sleep and school hours.
❉ EVIDENCE ON THE IMPACT OF A LATER HIGH SCHOOL START TIME. Read this study to learn more about the evidence for later high school start times.
❉ IN SEARCH OF A GOOD NIGHT'S SLEEP: PRACTICAL TIPS FROM DR. HARVEY KARP. Listen to this Mom Enough episode with The Happiest Baby Guide to Great Sleep author, Dr. Harvey Karp.
❉ ARE YOU CONCERNED THAT YOUR CHILD MAY NOT BE GETTING ENOUGH SLEEP? Tune in to this show to learn more about the symptoms and management of sleep disorders from expert, Dr. Gerald Rosen.
Amazon Links are from the Associate Program. Mom Enough® may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. We only share links to products that we have personally reviewed and/or used. Your purchase helps Mom Enough continue to offer evidence-based information at no cost to our listeners.
Many of us didn’t realize how essential good internet access was until the pandemic required so many of us to take our work, schooling, shopping and even healthcare into the virtual world. That experience also highlighted dramatic inequities among households and communities, in access to strong, stable internet service. A new government initiative, the Affordable Connectivity Program (ACP), is taking on those inequities, working closely with internet providers throughout the United States. Passed by Congress as part of the 2021 Infrastructure bill and launched in January of this year through the FCC, this program makes connectivity affordable to most households – or even free, when combined with assistance already offered by local providers.
In this episode of Mom Enough, Marti and Erin talk with Karly Baraga-Werner, a graduate of Georgetown Law School and Senior Director of Government and Regulatory Affairs for Comcast Twin Cities Region. Karly explains all the ins and outs of who is eligible, how to apply, and what, if anything, ACP participants will need to pay. Written material with all the details you need also are posted for free downloading on the Mom Enough website (www.momenough.com). If you don’t need the benefits of this program yourself, please spread the word among people you know! If you wish to provide printed information to people in your school, faith community or neighborhood, there also is a link on the Mom Enough site for ordering larger quantities of printed information in large quantities.
WHY IS AFFORDABLE CONNECTIVITY SO IMPORTANT? Think of the ways people of all ages are dependent on having access to the internet today. In what ways does access facilitate learning, access to healthcare, and a wide range of useful information and age-appropriate entertainment to the individuals in your family, whatever their ages? Who do you know who might benefit from ACP and perhaps also a local program, such as Comcast’s Internet Essentials, that can combine with ACP to make connectivity even less expensive or free?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT GETTING ACCESS TO AFFORDABLE INTERNET?
❉ Xfinity ACP. Check this link to see if you are eligible and learn how to apply for the Affordable Connectivity Program, where you can get affordable (or even free) internet with Xfinity Internet or Comcast Internet Essentials.
❉ INTERNET ESSENTIALS. Learn if you qualify for Comcast's Internet Essentials program and how to sign up, if you do. You can also call 855-8INTERNET to speak with someone about Internet Essentials.
❉ AFFORDABLE CONNECTIVITY PROGRAM. The Affordable Connectivity Program (ACP) is a federal program that helps low-income households pay for broadband and internet connected devices. You can also call 833-511-0311.
❉ INTERNET ESSENTIALS PARTNER PORTAL. Become a partner join the movement to close the digital divide. Access materials and resources that you can distribute. Help bring the internet to families in your community.
We parents often bemoan the amount of time our kids spend on screens of one sort or another, even as we know those electronic devices also have benefits – and, no doubt, are here to stay. But balance is important for people of all ages, and what better way to find balance than by getting out into nature? A wealth of research highlights the benefits of outdoor experience for physical health, focus, creativity, problem-solving and mental health, much thanks to the stress-reducing effects of being in nature. If we and our children learn to know and love nature, we also are more likely to become good stewards of the environment. We care for what we love!
With those benefits in mind, this week’s guest, Sandi Schwartz, has written a practical, inspiring book that is loaded with ways to get the whole family outdoors. In this lively conversation with Marti & Erin, Sandi talks specifically about ways to use electronic devices as a bridge to nature, as well as ideas for building on your children’s individual interests to help them want to get off the couch and out the door. After you listen, check out Sandi’s new book, Finding Ecohappiness: Fun Nature Activities to Help Your Kids Feel Happier and Calmer. Then head out for some fun and exploration with your kids.
WHAT CAN YOU DO TO HAVE MORE FUN IN NATURE? Think about each of your children and the things in which they are most interested. What ways could you use those interests to help them outdoors and connected to nature? If your children are very young (infants to three or four), how could you take some of their usual activities outdoors as a way of helping them get hooked on nature before they get hooked on screens?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT FINDING BALANCE AND FUN IN NATURE?
❉ ECOHAPPINESS PROJECT & FINDING ECOHAPPINESS BOOK. Check out the Ecohappiness Project and Sandi Schwartz latest book, Finding Ecohappiness: Fun Nature Activities to Help Your Kids Feel Happier and Calmer. You can also take the free Nature Habit Quiz to see what nature activities your kids will enjoy!
❉ SIMPLE WAYS TO ENJOY THE BENEFITS OF NATURE. Research demonstrates that time in nature increases positive emotions; reduces stress, anger, and fear; decreases blood pressure, heart rate, and muscle tension; and improves attention and enjoyment in learning. Whether you are the most outdoorsy or a complete novice when it comes to getting outdoors, tune in to this episode for tips for incorporating nature into your home, passions, travel, and even volunteering experiences. Listen as writer, nature psychology enthusiast and Happy Science Mom Blogger, Sandi Schwartz, discusses what she has learned as a mom and scientist about simple ways to enjoy the many benefits of nature.
❉ CONNECTING CHILDREN & NATURE. Check out this helpful tip sheet from Mom Enough's Dr. Marti Erickson to help your children reap the many benefits of time outdoors at every stage.
❉ GIVING YOUR CHILDREN THE BENEFITS OF NATURE EXPERIENCE. Sheila Williams Ridge joins Marti & Erin to talk about why nature experience is so important, both at school and at home. She offers simple ways we can connect our children with nature, wherever we live and whatever our resources.
❉ THE IMPORTANCE OF NATURE FOR ADULTS. Richard Louv’s book, The Nature Principle, provides new research, grand ideas and practical tips for integrating nature, large and small, into our homes, schools and communities. (As Louv says, the more technology we have, the more nature we need!) This Mom Enough show is a great chance to be inspired by Louv’s vision and to get ideas you can put to use right here, right now – ideas that can reduce stress and enhance the health and well-being of your whole family.
❉ PRACTICAL IDEAS TO CONNECT CHILDREN AND NATURE: A CONVERSATION WITH AUTHOR RICHARD LOUV. San Diego journalist Richard Louv, author of Last Child in the Woods has written a follow-up book, Vitamin N,
It is not uncommon for a young child to be expelled from child care due to a challenging behavior, especially hurtful behaviors like biting or hitting. And yet it’s hard to imagine a young child who doesn’t occasionally lash out in frustration or anger and have a hard time calming down and re-engaging in a more positive way. In early childhood (birth to 5), children are just learning how to manage emotions, share space and attention with others and handle conflict in reasonable ways.
As this week’s Mom Enough guest knows, children learn those lessons best when parents and other adults connect with them, recognize their feelings and engage them in thinking about what they can do differently. Dr. Anne Gearity joins Marti & Erin for a rich discussion that will help you think about and respond to challenging behavior in ways that are effective in the short-run and supportive of healthy development in the long-run. Thank you to Help Me Grow, a supporting partner of Mom Enough, for providing sponsoring this episode of Mom Enough.
WHAT CAN WE DO ABOUT CHALLENGING BEHAVIOR? Dr. Gearity says when children act out they are telling us, “I’m confused. I need your help.” Think of a recent situation in which a young child in your life engaged in a very challenging behavior. How did you respond and how did it work? How would your response have been different if you’d thought of the child saying, “I need your help?”
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT REGULATION & CHALLENGING BEHAVIORS? ❉ HELP ME GROW. A wealth of resources on child development, early childhood screening and more are available through Help Me Grow's website.
❉ DEVELOPMENTAL MILESTONES. View this helpful resource from Help Me Grow to see if your child's development is on track.
❉ I LOVE MY WHITE SHOES. Read this great Pete the Cat book.
❉ WAYS TO HELP CHILDREN THINK ABOUT BETTER SOLUTIONS FOR DIFFICULT BEHAVIORS. Check out this tip sheet from St. David’s Center, a Mom Enough supporting partner.
❉ PROMOTING SELF-REGULATION IN CHILDREN: THE IMPORTANCE OF REGULATORY PARTNERS. Most parents can recall a moment when their child threw a tantrum. Perhaps they were frustrated that they didn’t get what they wanted and fell to the floor screaming or crying? Or, maybe they missed a nap and simply couldn’t handle what was being asked of them? Regardless of the situation, a tantrum may be a perfectly normal response in early childhood, but in time, a child needs to learn healthier ways to express and cope with their emotions. Occupational therapist and health coach, Kate Biederman, from St. David’s Center for Child and Family Development joins Marti and Erin for this episode on the development of self-regulation in childhood.
After experiencing a stillbirth at 41 1/2 weeks, author Shannon Gibney found the silence around the experience an added source of trauma after an already devastating experience. As writers so often do, she turned to the literature and found that most of what was written was by white women or did not reflect her truth. So, she and author Kao Kalia Yang, who had suffered a pregnancy loss at 19 weeks, set out to elevate the voices of Indigenous women and women of color who have experienced miscarriage and infant loss.
Gibney joins Mom Enough to discuss What God is Honored Here? Writings on Miscarriage and Infant Loss By and For Native Women and Women of Color, which she co-edited with Kao Kalia Yang. Tune in to hear her story, excerpts from the book, and how we can all challenge the silence and dominant narratives around pregnancy loss.
WHAT CAN YOU DO TO CHALLENGE EXISTING NARRATIVES AROUND MISCARRIAGE AND INFANT LOSS?
Have you or someone you know experienced a miscarriage or infant loss? In what ways did you or your loved one find comfort or silence in the stories you heard about others' experiences or losses? What might you do differently in the future to support a friend or family member after a miscarriage or infant loss?
WANT TO LEARN MORE MISCARRIAGE AND INFANT LOSS?
❉ HELPING PARENTS HEAL AFTER MISCARRIAGE, STILLBIRTH OR A PRENATAL DIAGNOSIS OF A LIFE-THREATENING CONDITION. For many of us, pregnancy is a time of excitement, joy and anticipation of who this baby will be. But when anticipation turns to loss through miscarriage, a devastating prenatal diagnosis or stillbirth, grief engulfs mom, dad and other family members. Too often these heartbreaking experiences are suffered in silence – or perhaps dismissed by well-meaning friends who say, “You’ll be able to have another baby.” Tune in as Delta Larkey and Alyssa Wright discuss helping families navigate these losses and find strength and healing through rituals that are responsive to each family’s unique needs and strengths.
❉ MOTHERHOOD & WORDS: GIVING VOICE TO MOTHERS’ LOVE, LOSS AND LAUGHTER. Being a mom can evoke the highest and lowest of emotions, sometimes all at once! Minneapolis author and writing teacher Kate Hopper brings writers to Motherhood & Words at The Loft Literary Center to read from their latest works about their lives as mothers. Listen to three authors, including Kao Kalia Yang, who reads a powerful new piece about losing her first son in a very late miscarriage.
❉ HAVE YOU OR SOMEONE CLOSE TO YOU LOST A CHILD? The loss of a child is surely the most devastating thing a parent can experience. Dr. Joann O’Leary and Dr. Jane Warland, both experts in parenting after loss, bring rich insights and useful tips for moving forward (or helping someone you know move forward) after loss in this episode of Mom Enough.
Where should we turn if we think our child’s development might not be on track? For example, our toddler isn’t saying as many words as other kids her age? Or, our one-year-old isn’t sleeping through the night? Or perhaps our three-year-old is aggressive with other kids? And what if our parents or other family members tell us one thing, based on their cultural traditions and beliefs, and our healthcare provider or an early childhood professional suggests something else? This is a common dilemma. But this week’s Mom Enough guest, Zang Vang-Lee, brings wisdom on how to bridge those two worlds, based on her own experience as a Hmong mother of three and an experienced early childhood professional with a Masters of Education from the University of Minnesota.
Zang speaks with grace and respect about her own parents’ more relaxed approach -- “He’ll do it when he’s ready” -- compared to professional encouragement to take a child in for early childhood screening. She tells how a shaman helped her family get through a rough time with an unconsolable infant, as well as how her whole family came together around a wise decision to seek professional help for another challenge. Most of all, Zang explains and exemplifies how important it is for early childhood professionals to do all they can to understand a family’s culture and history, build a relationship of trust, and listen carefully in order to co-create a plan that addresses the needs and strengths of the child and the whole family. Marti & Erin thank Help Me Grow for their sponsorship of this informative and inspiring discussion with Zang Vang-Lee, as well as their long-time supporting partnership with Mom Enough.
WHAT CULTURAL BACKGROUND OR FAMILY HISTORY FACTORS HAVE PLAYED A ROLE IN YOUR PARENTING?
How does your cultural background or history shape the way you think about early child development? To what extent do you and the previous generation in your family hold the same beliefs, and does that pose a dilemma when you are deciding how to handle a difficult parenting situation? Where do you turn for information that you can trust to help you figure out the best next step for your child and you? Visit the Help Me Grow website to see how their carefully developed resources can help you learn more about child development and where to go if you are concerned about one of your children.
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT CULTURAL TRADITIONS, HMONG CULTURE, AND EARLY CHILDHOOD DEVELOPMENT?
❉ HMONG EARLY CHILDHOOD COALITION. A grassroots community organization, the HECC seeks to ensure all Hmong families and children have what they need to succeed and thrive, including access to early childhood education, translated and up-to-date information, and advocacy.
❉ HMONG CULTURAL CENTER. Through art and education, the Hmong Cultural Center promotes positive race relations in the Twin Cities. A Minnesota non-profit, the HCC provides resources and focuses on sustaining and teaching about Hmong culture.
❉ HMONG MUSEUM. Check out this museum, which is preserving Hmong culture, history, and arts and educating others about this important culture.
❉ AMERICAN INDIAN CHILDREN AND FAMILIES: BEYOND LORE AND STEREOTYPES. In this Mom Enough episode, sponsored by Help Me Grow MN, Lucy Littlewolf Arias, an Ojibwe Blackfeet and Latina mom and educator, joins Marti and Erin for a thoughtful discussion of this timely topic. She offers many resources where you and your children can learn more about American Indians here in Minnesota or among the 574 tribal nations throughout the U.S.
❉ THE LATE HOMECOMER: A HMONG FAMILY MEMOIR by Kao Kalia Yang
❉ THE SONG POET: A MEMOIR OF MY FATHER by Kao Kalia Yang
❉ THE SPIRIT CATCHES YOU AND YOU FALL DOWN: A MONG CHILD, HER AMERICAN DOCTORS, AND THE COLLISION OF TWO CULTURESby Anne Fadiman
These days an unprecedented number of both children and adults report feeling anxious and overwhelmed much of the time. Maybe you are one of them! Many of us find ourselves at the mercy of our smart phones, tablets and other devices, responding to every beep and ping as if our lives depended on it. We also may feel compelled to say yes to every invitation or request that comes our way. But then, when the time comes to follow through, we’d rather enjoy a long walk, spend some fun time with our loved ones or read a good book.
In the words of psychologist Dr. Anthony Rao (Tony), we have lost our “agency,’ the ability to make wise decisions and put those decisions into actions that are consistent with the life we want to live. We have lost the ability to be effective agents on our own behalf. And, in doing so, we are setting an example for our children to do the same. Tony joins Marti & Erin in this episode of Mom Enough to discuss highlights of the new book he has written with colleague Paul Napper, The Power of Agency: The Seven Principles to Conquer Obstacles, Make Effective Decisions, and Create a Life on Your Own Terms. In this lively discussion, Tony emphasizes the first three principles from his book: 1) Clear your mind by reducing stimuli; 2) Associate selectively; and 3) Move (or, as Tony says, “Use your body in more beautiful ways.”) He discusses how these foundational principles can be introduced to children of any age, setting the stage for both parent and child to increase their agency by moving on through all seven principles. Marti & Erin were inspired by Tony’s framework and practical tips and think you will be too.
WHAT WILL YOU DO WITH THE WISE ADVICE OF DR. RAO? What does the word "agency" mean to you? What would it look like if you increased your agency in the way you live your own life? Or helped your children do the same? Think of the first three principles Tony Rao discussed (clear your mind, affiliate selectively and move). What could you do this week to bring those principles to life for you and your children?
CHECK OUT THESE LINKS TO LEARN MORE ABOUT TOPICS RELATED TO AGENCY: ❉ ENGAGING CHILDREN AS GOOD CITIZENS: HELPING CHILDREN ENVISION THE WORLD THEY WANT AND TAKE ACTION TO REALIZE THAT VISION. Dr. Anne Klaeysen, head of the New York Society for Ethical Culture, offers clear and helpful ways to help our children discover their own values, learn what it means to be kind and fair on a large scale and recognize what they can contribute toward building a humane, ethical society, as children and throughout their lives.
❉ THE CHEMISTRY OF CALM AND JOY: A CONVERSATION WITH INTEGRATIVE PSYCHIATRIST HENRY EMMONS. Listen as Dr. Emmons discusses the chemistry of emotions and simple, accessible strategies to manage energy, quiet our minds, build resilience and maximize our experience of calm, joy and well-being.
❉ HOW TO HELP YOUR CHILDREN REFLECT ON EMOTIONS AND BEHAVIORAL CHOICES. Check out this brief clip from the 2017 Night Out For ME presentation.
In the mid-1990s, a breakthrough study by the CDC and Kaiser Permanente documented the serious and long-term effects of Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) on both mental and physical health. That study and the ACEs questionnaire used in the research became the framework for community action around the country to prevent ACEs and/or help children heal and thrive when ACEs could not be prevented. Since that original research, follow-up studies have looked more closely at how ACEs and their consequences might differ across cultures and contexts.
In this episode of Mom Enough®, Brandon Jones, Executive Director of the Minnesota Association for Children’s Mental Health (MACMH), joins Marti & Erin to discuss what we should know about ACEs. Drawing on both professional and personal experience, Brandon offers hope for healing if you realize that you – or a child or adult close to you – has a high ACEs score. Reflection, self-compassion, self-care, positive relationships and fun can all make a difference.
REFLECTING ON ADVERSE CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES Consider your own early childhood history and any ACES you experienced. How did others around you respond and how did those actions help or hinder you from healing? What steps could you take now to continue the healing process?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT ADVERSE CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES? ❉ HEALING LONGTERM EFFECTS OF ADVERSE CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES (ACES): A CONVERSATION WITH PEDIATRICIAN AND AUTHOR NADINE BURKE HARRIS. We’ve known that adversity and trauma in childhood have long-term effects on mental health and well-being. But in recent years, groundbreaking research on adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) has demonstrated the long-term consequences for physical health, including heart disease, lung disease and cancer. As a pediatrician, Dr. Nadine Burke Harris confronted the effects of early trauma in a 7-year-old patient and that changed the course of her medical practice and her life. Don’t miss Dr. Burke Harris’s impassioned – and hopeful – conversation with Marti & Erin in this episode of Mom Enough.
Has your child dreamed of going to a top college? Have you wondered if there are things you can do to make this dream a reality? With college applications increasing, the competition is tough. So, what can you do to support your children in academics and extracurriculars to help them stand out?
Jamie Beaton, Harvard University and Stanford University graduate, and PhD student at Oxford University, shares his insights on getting into top colleges with Marti & Erin. Author of Accepted! Secrets to Gaining Admission to the World's Top Universities, Beaton offers sage advice for how parents can support their children in getting the most out of their academics, maintaining motivation, and preparing for college. And, learn when you should start talking to your children about college. You might be surprised to hear just how important the parent-child relationship is in supporting your child on their path to college. Tune in for insider tips from the Co-Founder and CEO of Crimson Education -- an organization that is leveling the playing field in top university admissions.
WHAT STEPS WILL YOU TAKE TO HELP YOUR CHILD MAKE THEIR COLLEGE DREAMS COME TRUE? What 1-2 things will you do differently as you support your children in getting the most out of their academics and extracurriculars? How will you support your child in keeping their motivation strong with the pandemic-related fluctuations in the learning environment? When will you begin to talk with your children about college?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT COLLEGE? ❉ HOW COLLEGE MAKES OR BREAKS US. Best-selling author Paul Tough spent six years exploring colleges in 21 states. He interviewed faculty, SAT tutors and students from all walks of life, concluding that higher education as an engine of social mobility is breaking down. He joins Marti & Erin in this episode to discuss highlights of what he learned and to offer action steps for college admissions, alumni, and public officials who make decisions on higher education funding.
❉ PARENTING COLLEGE STUDENTS: A FREE ONLINE RESOURCE FOR ALL PARENTS. It’s a big change for parents when children begin college. Parenting college students is a new phase of parenting! If our kids go away to school, we may wonder what is really going on in their lives. Jodi Dworkin and Marjorie Savage from the University of Minnesota’s College of Education and Human Development (CEHD) put their knowledge and experience to work in developing a rich new website, Parenting College Students, to help parents of college students wherever they are. Marti & Erin are glad to know this website will be here for them when the next generation in their family head to college!
❉ THE PRICE YOU PAY FOR COLLEGE: AN INTERVIEW WITH NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING AUTHOR, RON LIEBER. Ron Lieber, the “Your Money” columnist for The New York Times, joins Marti and Erin to discuss his latest book, The Price You Pay for College: An Entirely New road Map for the Biggest Financial Decision Your Family Will Ever Make. He shares insights on the many options for post-secondary education and demystifies the often-confusing world of college finances. Learn what to look for in a college, gain clarity on merit aid, and walk away with a better understanding of the benefits of a gap year. If you have children who are planning to go to college, even if that is years away, you won’t want to miss this episode!
Do you struggle to keep the spark in your relationship since becoming a parent? Sometimes the exhaustion and stress of parenthood really zap the romance out of your relationship. But a strong, happy marriage is good for you and good for your kids. So, how can we ensure our love stays strong after parenthood?
Dr. Bill Doherty is a University of Minnesota professor, author and marriage and family therapist who has devoted his life to understanding what makes and keeps marriages strong. You, your spouse and your children will reap the benefits of the tried and true advice he brings to Mom Enough. As a bonus, Bill also offers tips about the most helpful way to respond if a friend confides in you with concerns about his or her marriage. Don’t miss this timely Valentine’s week show!
WHAT STEPS WILL YOU TAKE TO HAVE A HAPPY MARRIAGE? How did your marriage change when you became a parent? How does parenthood affect your relationship now? What strategies do you already use to keep your relationship strong, and what new tips for a happy marriage did you get in this Mom Enough discussion?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT KEEPING THE LOVE ALIVE? ❉ Take Back Your Marriage. Check out Dr. Bill Doherty's book for more information keeping the love strong.
❉ MARITAL FIRST RESPONDERS. Check out this free course where you can learn how best to respond when friends or family confide in you about their marriages.
❉ DISCERNING WHEN YOUR UNHAPPY MARRIAGE CAN BE SAVED: PART 1 OF “WHEN YOUR MARRIAGE IS NOT WHAT YOU WANT IT TO BE." Even under the best of circumstances, marriage involves hard work, with highs and lows an expected part of the journey. Responsibilities of parenting create added stress even in the best of marriages. But what if your marriage is really not what you want it to be? What if you believe your unhappy marriage is on the brink of failure? Tune in as Dr. Bill Doherty shares information and resources to help couples discern whether their unhappy marriage can be saved and to take steps to do so when possible.
❉ THE DOHERTY RELATIONSHIP INSTITUTE. Want to learn more about Discernment Counseling? Or, are you interested in Dr. Doherty's approach to couple's therapy? Check out the Doherty Relationship Institute.
Are the demands of school, homework, sports, and clubs contributing to anxiety and depression among teens? And what role is the pandemic playing in the increasing rates of teen anxiety and depression? What are the current rates of anxiety and depression for young people? And, most importantly, what can we do about it? Dr. Stuart Slavin, physician and mental health researcher, joins Mart & Erin to share insights from recent research on teen anxiety and depression. He outlines the factors that contribute to mental health challenges among adolescents, including activities, demands, and sources of stress in their lives. He also highlights "problematic mindsets" and their contribution to mental health outcomes. Tune in to hear what the data show and what we can do about it. WHAT CAN WE DO TO REDUCE THE RISKS OF ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION AMONG TEENS? What role do school, sports, clubs, and homework play in teen mental health? How can we address "problematic mindsets" in our children? What could you do to minimize the amplifying effects of social media?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH? ❉ BREAKING THE STIGMA: A STORY OF CHILDHOOD ANXIETY, FROM PAIN AND SHAME TO STRENGTH AND HEALING. Bryan Piatt was a talented and popular TV journalist and news anchor with a calm and competent on-screen presence. But, inside, he struggled with the intense anxiety that had plagued him since childhood. When anxiety began to compromise his job performance, Bryan took the brave step of going public with his story so that others could benefit from what he had experienced and learned. He joins Mom Enough hosts Marti & Erin for a candid conversation about how anxiety affected his life from childhood to adulthood, the ways many adults missed the meaning of the signs Bryan was presenting, and what finally happened to put him on the path to strength and healing.
❉ CHILDHOOD ANXIETY: POSSIBLE CAUSES, HELPFUL STRATEGIES AND EFFECTIVE TREATMENTS. Does your child stress out in new situations, lose sleep over upcoming tests or become upset when things don’t go as planned? Childhood anxiety affects many children and often runs in families. But there are helpful steps you can take to ease your child’s anxiety and teach skills your child can use to manage his or her own stress. Psychiatrist Dr. Elizabeth Reeve brings her knowledge and experience with childhood anxiety to this lively discussion with Marti & Erin, who share a few stories of how anxiety shows up on their own family tree!
❉ SCHOOL ANXIETY: UNDERSTANDING CAUSES AND FINDING EFFECTIVE STRATEGIES. Many children of all ages experience school anxiety, whether stressing out about academic performance, fearing bullies on the bus or feeling overwhelmed by separation anxiety when it’s time to leave home. Clinical psychologist Dr. Jordan Hart shares practical, effective, evidence-based advice for how parents can help children overcome school anxiety and build skills that will help them meet challenges throughout their live in this episode of Mom Enough.
❉ SIGNS OF CHILDHOOD DEPRESSION: WHAT WE ALL SHOULD KNOW. Childhood should be a time of joy, discovery and positive connection with family and friends. So it’s difficult for most of us to imagine a child experiencing depression. But, depression can and does affect people of any age. And it’s up to teachers, parents and other caring adults to be alert to the signs of childhood depression and to make sure a child exhibiting those signs gets a proper evaluation and, as needed, appropriate treatment and support. Child and adolescent psychiatrist Elizabeth Reeve joins Marti & Erin to address the signs of childhood depression.
❉ UNDERSTANDING AND PREVENTING YOUTH SUICIDE WITH THE EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR OF SAVE. With so many young people experiencing symptoms of depression and anxiety these days, parents often worry about the risk of youth suicide. And yes, suicide is the second leading cause of death among ages 15 – 24.
Nearly half of Americans have a family member or friend who has or is struggling with an addiction to drugs. Based on data from the National Surveys on Drug Use and Health (NSDUHs), 2009 to 2014, approximately 1 in 8 children in the US had a parent with a substance use disorder. The disease of addiction is a "family disease," because it affects more than just the individual struggling with addiction. Coping skills are essential when a family member is struggling with addiction. So, how can we develop these skills? What role does shame play in addiction and what can we do about it? If you are feeling hopeless about a family member’s addiction, what questions can you ask yourself to help you move through the hopelessness? And, how can you support a loved one through recovery while also caring for yourself? Beverly Conyers, mother and grandmother, writes about addiction and wellness. She answers these questions and more on Mom Enough this week. Tune in to hear her story about her daughter's addiction to heroin and her practical tips for anyone who is trying to cope with a loved one’s addiction. The second edition of her first book, the highly acclaimed Addict in the Family: Support for Loss, Hope, and Recovery, was published by Hazelden Publishing in October 2021. Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is a supporting partner of Mom Enough and we are grateful for their support in spreading evidence-based information about substance use disorders. WHAT STEPS CAN YOU TAKE TO COPE WITH A LOVED ONE'S ADDICTION? What is one thing you can do to take care of yourself as you support a family member or friend with addiction? What is the difference between recovery and sobriety? What might you ask yourself if things feel hopeless?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT ADDICTION? ❉ OPIOID ADDICTION: KEYS TO PREVENTION AND INTERVENTION FROM THE HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. What can parents do to protect the children and adults in our family and community from the dangers of opioids? Ahmed Eid, Addiction Program Manager at the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, brings answers that every parent should hear. He addresses safer options for managing pain, how to dispose of leftover opioids, signs of opioid addiction, and effective treatment options.
❉ PARENTAL ADDICTION: IMPACT ON THE PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIP & HOW TO HEAL TOGETHER. Parental addiction has significant effects on children and the parent-child relationship, but there is hope and healing is possible. Helene Photias, national director of operations for the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation’s Children’s Program, and Paula Frisk, senior director of zero to five home visiting programs at St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development, join Marti & Erin to discuss keys to helping parents and children move toward healing, build more positive and secure relationships, and create the fun and joy that every child and parent deserves.
❉ HOPE FOR FAMILIES FACING ADDICTION: EXPERT ADVICE FROM HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. Kate Roselle, licensed clinical counselor and national outreach manager for Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation’s adolescent and young adult continuum of care, joins Mom Enough for a compelling discussion on families facing addiction. She shares tips for effecting change if a loved one is struggling, discusses clinical resources for families, and explores the factors that are associated with the greatest hope of successful treatment and recovery. Roselle says, “The opposite of addiction is connection,” and that informs the work of Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.
❉ WOMEN, ADDICTION AND MENTAL HEALTH: INFORMATION AND PRACTICAL GUIDANCE FROM HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. Dr. Sarah Wicks joins Marti & Erin to discuss unique challenges faced by women dealing with addiction and, more broadly, how to approach a loved one (male or female) you believe has a substance use problem.
Anxiety, depression, and other signs of emotional difficulty are at an all-time high among young people today. While many factors contribute to that pattern during these challenging times, experts increasingly are seeing the various ways that relentless use of social media plays a role in undermining the health and wellbeing of young people (and adults too).
In this week’s episode of Mom Enough, co-hosts Dr. Marti Erickson and Dr. Erin Erickson bring their own professional expertise and personal experience to their discussion of this important topic. They talk about what parents and kids need to know about the addictive power of social media and the ways social media platforms use sophisticated algorithms to maximize the time both young people and adults spend on social media. Acknowledging the positive ways social media can keep people connected with each other, Marti and Erin also highlight various ways social media often undermines users’ confidence, sense of self, and overall health and wellbeing. Most important, they offer effective ways to engage kids (and all family members) in reflecting on their own social media use and coming up with strategies for managing their use in ways that are healthy and balanced. Don’t miss this timely, informative discussion!
WHAT CAN YOU DO AS A FAMILY TO CHANGE YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH SOCIAL MEDIA? Schedule a time for a family meeting to consider the following four questions about your own experiences with social media. Make sure to listen to each other’s responses, both positive and negative; there are no right or wrong answers to the questions. 1) How do you feel when you use social media? 2) What things does social media squeeze out of your life? 3) How are platforms targeting you so you will keep going back to their site? 4) What strategies could our family (and each of us) use to manage social media in a healthier way?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SOCIAL MEDIA? ❉ MORE THAN A BODY: REDEFINING THE MEANING OF BEAUTY. Do you worry about the harms of social media, especially on body image? Do you find that you compare yourself to others as you scroll through Instagram or Facebook? In a culture where beauty is so often the primary focus, it can be a challenge to avoid harmful self-comparisons and to appreciate our bodies (and all they allow us to do). It can also be a struggle to see that we are more than a body. Dr. Lexie Kite joins Mom Enough to discuss “body image resilience,” navigating social media without harmful self-comparisons, and becoming more media savvy as we curate a healthier “body image environment.”
❉ TECHNOLOGY AND YOUNG CHILDREN: GUIDANCE AND INNOVATIONS. Advice and warnings about technology and young children are confusing for many parents. Susan Walker, Associate Professor of Parent & Family Education in the U of M’s Department of Family Social Science, offers guidance on appropriate use of technology and the ways technology can bring parent and child together, capitalizing on the importance of face to face interaction.
❉ TEENS AND TECHNOLOGY: ENCOURAGING RESEARCH. Conversations about teens and technology often revolve around potential risks to health and development or negative effects on interpersonal relationships. But Jodi Dworkin, professor and associate department head in the U of M’s Department of Family Social Science, brings research that contradicts some of those concerns. She assures parents that technology has benefits and cell phones have not replaced teens’ more personal connections with peers and parents. Knowing that some teens do have negative experiences with technology, Jodi also highlights ways to monitor use and to be alert to signs that your teen might have a problem.
When we think of preparing a child for kindergarten, we often think of teaching them letters and numbers. But one of the most important skills for making a smooth transition to kindergarten is self-regulation. That means such things as learning to express feelings in a healthy way, manage impulses, and seek out places and experiences that will calm you down or perk you up, as needed. Certain kinds of classroom environments (and certainly many outdoor learning settings) make it easier for children to develop these self-regulatory skills. And both teachers and parents play crucial roles in helping children understand feelings, needs, and effective ways to manage both.
Early childhood teacher and author, Mike Huber, of St. David's Center for Child and Family Development (SDC), joins Marti & Erin for a practical discussion of this important aspect of development. This is the third podcast of a special 3-part series on self-regulation, brought to you by SDC, a longtime supporting partner of Mom Enough. Mike’s interview builds on Melissa Williams’ discussion of co-regulation in infancy (July 12, 2021) and Kate Biederman’s conversation about the importance of “regulatory partners” for children of any age (October 4, 2021).
WHAT WAS YOUR BIGGEST TAKEAWAY ABOUT SELF-REGULATION IN PRESCHOOL? What did Mike Huber say about the characteristics of a “regulation-based classroom” as compared to a “compliance-based classroom”? What would you watch for or ask about if you were visiting preschools to find one that would best support your child’s self-regulatory skills? Based on what you have heard in all three of the podcasts in this series on self-regulation, what can you do at home to support self-regulation, whatever the ages of your children?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SELF-REGULATION? ❉ FROM CO-REGULATION TO SELF-REGULATION: PARENT-CHILD INTERACTIONS THAT PREPARE OUR CHILDREN FOR LIFE. Tune into the first episode of the series on self-regulation with Melissa Williams from St. David's Center. Tune into this engaging and practical discussion about what is involved in co-regulation, with an emphasis on how to show, tell and practice together with our children. Melissa also highlights the importance of “rupture and repair,” describing how we can admit our mistakes at those times when we get it wrong with our kids (as we all do!), say we are sorry and tell our child what we will try to do differently the next time.
❉ PROMOTING SELF-REGULATION IN CHILDREN: THE IMPORTANCE OF REGULATORY PARTNERS. Most parents can recall a moment when their child threw a tantrum. Perhaps they were frustrated that they didn’t get what they wanted and fell to the floor screaming or crying? Or, maybe they missed a nap and simply couldn’t handle what was being asked of them? Regardless of the situation, a tantrum may be a perfectly normal response in early childhood, but in time, a child needs to learn healthier ways to express and cope with their emotions. This is called self-regulation. Occupational therapist and health coach, Kate Biederman, from St. David’s Center for Child and Family Development shares how you can join your child in the process of building self-regulation by partnering with them as they begin to develop the skills they need to be happy and healthy. Walk away with a clear understanding of the three big tasks of regulatory partners and tips for implementing these at different ages and stages. You won’t want to miss this in-depth discussion on self-regulation.
❉ HELPING CHILDREN WITH ASD IMPROVE REGULATION AND FOCUS AT HOME AND SCHOOL: A CONVERSATION WITH KATE BIEDERMAN FROM ST. DAVID’S CENTER FOR CHILD & FAMILY DEVELOPMENT. As occupational therapist Kate Biederman describes in this Mom Enough episode, some children respond well to deep touch, while others find that aversive. Many children feel calm after they engage in what Kate calls “heavy work,” which includes climbing on a jungle gym or jumping on a mini-tra...
The pandemic has been challenging for everyone. For young people, it has been especially difficult as so many of the normal rights of passage of youth have been disrupted. So, how has the pandemic challenged young people's mental health? In what ways has the pandemic affected those with, or at risk for, substance use disorders? And, how has delivery of care for young people struggling with addiction shifted during the pandemic?
Dr. Sara Polley, medical director at the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation’s national substance use and mental health treatment center for adolescents and young adults, joins Mom Enough for this compelling episode. She shares her expertise on youth and substance use disorders, and highlights the significant effects of the pandemic on youth and the delivery of addiction treatment. Listen to Polley's personal story about addiction in her family and how that led her to a career in addiction medicine. You won't want to miss this important show on addiction in young people during the pandemic!
HOW HAS THE PANDEMIC AFFECTED MENTAL HEALTH IN YOUNG PEOPLE?
What have you noticed about the effects of the pandemic on the young people in your lives? Where would you go To address stigma, how might we better support individuals and families struggling with addiction?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ADDICTION AND YOUNG PEOPLE?
❉ HOPE FOR FAMILIES FACING ADDICTION: EXPERT ADVICE FROM HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. Did you know that 1 in 10 people over the age of 12 years struggles with a substance use disorder? With such a high incidence, it is likely that most people have a friend or family member who is struggling with substance use or abuse. So, how does addiction affect families? And is there hope for families facing addiction? Kate Roselle of Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation’s adolescent and young adult continuum of care joins Mom Enough for a compelling discussion on families facing addiction.
❉ PROMOTING WELLNESS, PREVENTING SUBSTANCE MISUSE: WISDOM FROM FCD PREVENTION WORKS. Are your kids pleading to go to parties because “everyone else goes”? And how accurate are your kids’ perceptions that “everyone else” is doing this? Are you looking to support your child in making healthy choices around alcohol, tobacco, and other drugs? Deirdre Flynn from FCD Prevention Works™, part of the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, joins Marti & Erin to share critical information to help you support your children in making healthy choices.
❉ RECOGNIZING AND RESPONDING TO SIGNS OF POSSIBLE SUBSTANCE ABUSE IN YOUR ADOLESCENT OR YOUNG ADULT: GUIDANCE FROM THE HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. As parents, most of us would rather not even think about the possibility that our son or daughter could develop an addiction to alcohol or other substances. But putting our head in the sand and ignoring signs of possible substance abuse only increases the risks. Tune into this episode for the information you need to recognize signs of substance abuse, seek an evaluation by an experienced professional, and, if needed, get appropriate treatment and family support.
Many of us grew up with stereotypes of American Indians that came from movies, TV shows or even from limited, often unidimensional accounts in our history books. But, what are the things we and our children should know now about the history of tribes on this land that was theirs long before European settlers arrived? What should we know about values, languages, traditions and arts and how those are still relevant? What are the challenges American Indians face today? And, most important, what are the strengths that are helping individuals, families and tribes overcome things that were done to diminish them, both past and present?
In this Mom Enough episode, sponsored by Help Me Grow MN, Lucy Littlewolf Arias, an Ojibwe Blackfeet and Latina mom and educator, joins Marti and Erin for a thoughtful discussion of this timely topic. She offers many resources where you and your children can learn more about American Indians here in Minnesota or among the 574 tribal nations throughout the U.S.
WHY IS IT SO IMPORTANT TO CHALLENGE STEREOTYPES AND LEARN MORE ABOUT AMERICAN INDIANS?
What are your images of American Indians, past and present, and how did you develop those images? What could you do to deepen your understanding of American Indian history and current life? Specifically, how could you learn firsthand about American Indians in your own state or community? And why is this important for your children to learn from an early age?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT AMERICAN INDIANS AND THE IMPORTANCE OF PREVENTING THE ERASURE OF AMERICAN INDIAN CULTURE AND HERITAGE?
❉ Minnesota Historical Society, Teaching American Indian History and Culture. Check out this link to learn more about American Indian history and culture.
❉ Understand Native Minnesota. Learn more about the many important contributions American Indians make to our state. Check out the Native Minnesota podcast as well!
❉ National Museum of the American Indian. Find out more about current collections and exhibitions and view resources to help you learn (or teach your students) about American Indians.
❉ American Indians in Children's Literature. Read analysis of children's and young adult literature featuring Indigenous people. Learn about problematic phrases and books that reflect harmful stereotypes or are otherwise offensive. And, more importantly, learn about the best of American Indian literature.
❉ US Department of Interior, Indian Affairs FAQ. Learn more about policies related to American Indian tribes in the US.
This time of year often evokes a wide range of feelings – excitement, joy, sadness, longing or all of the above. Especially for moms, any and all of those emotions often come with holiday stress and anxiety – “How can I possibly get everything done?!”
Family researcher Dr. Anna Kudak has spent recent years interviewing women about their holiday experiences and even following some moms into the kitchen or shopping mall. She has a lot to say about why the holidays stress us out. But, she and Marti & Erin also have some good ideas about how to ease up a bit and find your true meaning in whatever holidays you celebrate!
WHAT WOULD GIVE YOUR HOLIDAY MORE MEANING?
Think about the last big holiday you celebrated. To what extent did it capture the meaning you wanted it to have? What messages do you think your children received from you about the meaning of the holiday? What would you wish to do differently the next time the holidays roll around to reduce your holiday stress?
WANT MORE TIPS ON MAKING THE MOST OF THE HOLIDAYS?
❉ WOMEN, ALCOHOL AND HOLIDAY STRESS: HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION ON HEALTHY CHOICES ABOUT ALCOHOL. It can be easy to slip into an unhealthy pattern of using alcohol to cope with holiday stress. The holidays create extra stress for women, who typically bear the greatest responsibility for holiday preparations. Add to that an emphasis on alcohol at holiday festivities and over-drinking, or a relapse in maintaining already-established sobriety, are risks. Kim Albers, Director of Recovery Management at Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, provides very clear information on how to know if your drinking is problematic and where to turn to get help tailored to your specific needs and strengths.
❉ PUTTING THE SANITY BACK IN HOLIDAY SHOPPING: PRACTICAL MESSAGES ABOUT CHILDHOOD MEMORIES OF THE HOLIDAYS. Marketers have had us and our children in their sights for a long time, giving us a million ideas for how to spend our money to make this the best holiday season ever. But what are the childhood memories you cherish and recall from the holidays? Chances are they are less about expensive gifts than about fun and laugher with the people who loved you. Nathan Dungan, founder of Share, Save, Spend, joins Marti & Erin for a timely, helpful and heartfelt discussion about how to reduce stress, increase joy and enhance the significance of this special time of year. You will be glad you tuned in!
With so many young people experiencing symptoms of depression and anxiety these days, parents often worry about the risk of youth suicide. And yes, suicide is the second leading cause of death among ages 15 – 24. But, as this week’s guest, Dr. Dan Reidenberg, explains, young people are the least likely age to die by suicide, with middle-aged adults the most likely. Furthermore, Dr. Reidenberg says, “Suicide is the most preventable death there is.”
Don’t miss this informative, practical discussion that addresses how to talk with your child if you fear they are thinking of suicide; both positive and negative aspects of social media as related to youth suicide; whether kids talk about suicide just to get attention; and the possibility of “suicide contagion.” Most important, learn how crucial it is to be clear, concise and concrete if you believe your child is thinking of suicide. Simple statements like, “This is a very serious thing. We are going to do something about it,” can make all the difference! You won't want to miss this episode with Dr. Dan Reidenberg, Executive Director of SAVE (Suicide Awareness Voices of Education).
WHAT WAS THE MOST IMPORTANT TAKEAWAY IN THIS EPISODE ABOUT PREVENTING SUICIDE? In this discussion about youth suicide, what did you learn that surprised you? What were the most important pieces of advice you took away from Dr. Reidenberg’s answers to questions?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT PREVENTING SUICIDE? ❉ THE SUICIDE SURVIVORS’ CLUB: ONE FAMILY’S EFFORT TO BRING SUICIDE OUT OF THE SHADOWS. A parent’s death is devastating to the surviving spouse and children. But when the death is by suicide, stigma may lead to silence and isolation, and suicide survivors often experience the added pain of guilt, shame, confusion and anger. Rebecca Anderson and her children lost their husband and father to suicide in 2002 and, since then, have taken steps to challenge the stigma of mental illness and suicide, using their experience to support others facing such a tragic loss. Tune in to this episode to learn more.
❉ HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION WEBINAR: STOP THE YOUTH SUICIDE CRISIS. Suicide is the second leading cause of death among people ages 10 to 34 in the United States, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Additionally, a study published in the Journal of Abnormal Psychology says depression rates among teenagers are on the rise. Join Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation and watch this pre-recorded webinar on addressing this critical issue.
Are you a small business owner of color? Or are you looking to support small business owners of color? Do you need support for your small business? Then you won't want to miss this episode of Mom Enough!
Comcast RISE -- which stands for Representation, Investment, Strength, and Empowerment -- just gave $10,000 grants to one hundred small business owners of color throughout the Twin Cities. Kalyn Hove, Regional Senior Vice President for Comcast Twin Cities Region, joins Marti & Erin to discuss this program and share more about the impact of these grants. Tune in to learn why Comcast wanted to do this for the Twin Cities, why this program is so important, and who will be able to apply for these programs in the future. (HINT: the program is expanding and any women out there who are business owners will want to check it out.) Click the links below to learn about the winners of the Comcast RISE grants and how you can support these winners by connecting with their businesses.
CHECK OUT THIS VIDEO TO HEAR HOW COMCAST RISE HELPED ONE BUSINESS OWNER HAVE AN IMPACT ON HER COMMUNITY DURING THE PANDEMIC:
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SUPPORTING SMALL BUSINESS OWNERS OF COLOR OR APPLYING FOR A FUTURE COMCAST RISE GRANT? ❉ CHECK OUT THE COMCAST RISE WINNERS. Consider visiting these businesses, so you can play a role in supporting small business owners of color.
❉ LEARN MORE ABOUT THE COMCAST RISE PROGRAM. Are you interested in applying for a grant? Want to know if you qualify? Get all the details for the Comcast RISE program.
❉ APPLY FOR A COMCAST RISE GRANT. Check out this link to learn about the next grant cycle and see if you qualify!
Do you have a young adult child who is struggling with adulting? Are they finding it difficult to take on the many important tasks and responsibilities of adulthood? It's no surprise as college gets more expensive (and loan debt increases), as wage growth is slow, and as healthcare and housing costs climb. So, what can be done to support our young adult children as they make the transition into adulthood?
New York Times bestselling author, Julie Lythcott-Haims, returns to Mom Enough with a new book on supporting our children in becoming adults. She shares wisdom, personal reflections, and the stories of other young adults in her ultimate guide for adulting, Your Turn: How to Be an Adult. With vulnerability and compassion, Lythcott-Haims offers insights and helpful tips to guide young adults to discover their unique selves and define their singular path to adulthood. Speaking of the transition to adulthood, 16-year-old Clara Garner joins her mom, Dr. Erin Erickson, as this episode's co-host. Clara was eager to hear what Julie Lythcott-Haims had to say about how young adults can combat perfectionism, stop pleasing others, and identify their "why" as they make the world a better place. You won't want to miss this important episode of Mom Enough!
WHAT STEPS CAN YOUR YOUNG ADULT TAKE TO BEGIN ADULTING? How can we support young adults in moving past perfectionism? Why is it important that young adults stop aiming to please others? Contribution is an important part of being a healthy adult. How can we, and the young adults in our lives, find our "why" as we make the world better?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT BECOMING AN ADULT AND JULIE LYTHCOTT HAIMS? ❉ HOW TO RAISE AN ADULT: A CONVERSATION WITH NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING AUTHOR, JULIE LYTHCOTT-HAIMS. While our job as parents is to love, care for, and teach our children, the purpose of our role is to raise a contributing member of society as our children reach adulthood. Lythcott-Haims shares wisdom and insights from her book, How to Raise an Adult, in this compelling episode of Mom Enough.
❉ JULIE LYTHCOTT-HAIMS. Learn more about New York Times bestselling author, Julie Lythcott-Haims on her website.
❉ EXCERPT OF HOW TO BE AN ADULT. Begin reading Julie Lythcott-Haims latest book now!
When a parent or other family member is struggling with addiction to alcohol or other drugs, children often pay a high price, whatever their age. They may feel scared, uncertain what to expect, unsure if they dare to seek help or tell someone outside the household. Children often feel isolated, have difficulty regulating or expressing their feelings, and are prone to feeling depressed or engaging in risky behaviors.
Experts at Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation (HBFF), a supporting partner of Mom Enough, have great hope for these children if they can be engaged in carefully designed programs tailored to their circumstances, needs and strengths. Helene Photias, a longtime leader at HBFF and recently appointed Chief Executive of their Children’s Program, joins Marti and Erin to discuss this important topic. She highlights how the Children’s Program, both in-person and virtual, helps children build resilience, emotional health and practical living skills.
HOW DOES ADDICTION IN THE FAMILY AFFECT CHILDREN? Imagine a child of 7, 10 or 12, living with a parent who is addicted to alcohol or other drugs. What might it feel like to that child when it’s time for dinner and no adult is around or sober enough to prepare a decent meal? Or what if the child doesn’t understand a difficult homework assignment or is upset about being teased or bullies on the school playground that day? Where would the child turn for help or how would the child cope with their fear, sadness, anger or uncertainty?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT ADDICTION?
❉ HOPE FOR FAMILIES FACING ADDICTION: EXPERT ADVICE FROM HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. Did you know that 1 in 10 people over the age of 12 years struggles with a substance use disorder? With such a high incidence, it is likely that most people have a friend or family member who is struggling with substance use or abuse. So, how does addiction affect families? And is there hope for families facing addiction? Kate Roselle of Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation’s adolescent and young adult continuum of care joins Mom Enough for a compelling discussion on families facing addiction.
❉ OPIOID ADDICTION: KEYS TO PREVENTION AND INTERVENTION FROM THE HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. We all have read the heartbreaking stories of young people’s lives destroyed by opioid addiction, and most of us probably have a family member or friend who has been touched by this insidious problem. But did you know that the U.S. consumes 80% of the opioids in the world (and 99% of hydrocodone), even though we make up only 4.4% of the world’s population? Although opioid prescriptions have dropped since their peak in 2012 (when 255 million prescriptions were written), recent data still show 191 million prescriptions being written per year. So, what can we do as parents to protect the children and adults in our family and community from the dangers of opioids? In this episode of Mom Enough, Ahmed Eid, Addiction Program Manager at the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, brings answers that every parent should hear.
❉ PARENTAL ADDICTION: IMPACT ON THE PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIP & HOW TO HEAL TOGETHER. Parental addiction has significant effects on children and the parent-child relationship, but there is hope and healing is possible. When a parent is addicted to alcohol or other drugs, their relationships with their children suffer, whatever the ages of the children. Given a chance, school-age children often describe working hard to keep their parent’s secret, trying to take care of their parent, and worrying that they can’t trust their parent to be there when they need them. Helene Photias of Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation’s Children’s Program and Paula Frisk of St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development, join Marti & Erin to discuss keys to helping parents and children move toward healing, build more positive and secure relationships, and create the fun and joy that every child and parent deserves.
For parents of daughters, the teen years can be one of the most fun and exciting times and one of the most challenging. One day, your daughter is confiding in you and the next she doesn't want to tell you anything. So, what exactly is going on in your teen daughter's mind? And how can you use that information to find better ways to communicate?
Parent educator, author, and teen life coach Sheri Gazitt shares practical tips to stay connected with your daughter. Learn what to do if your daughter no longer comes to you when she is struggling, what to avoid to keep communication lines open, and how to develop grit as a parent.
HOW WILL YOU FOSTER A DEEPER CONNECTION WITH YOUR TEEN DAUGHTER? What might you do differently next time your daughter is struggling, but won't talk to you? How will you show your daughter that you believe in her? What steps will you take to shift from fixing to focusing on connecting?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT RAISING TEEN DAUGHTERS?
❉ THE MOTHER-DAUGHTER RELATIONSHIP, FOR BETTER OR WORSE: A CONVERSATION WITH PSYCHOLOGIST AND AUTHOR RONI COHEN-SANDLER. The mother-daughter relationship can offer a special kind of emotional closeness, mutual support and a lot of fun over the years. But at times it also can be fraught with tension and conflict (e.g. why are you giving me that look?!). In this candid and thoughtful conversation, Dr. Roni Cohen-Sandler, author of I’m Not Mad, I Just Hate You! joins Marti & Erin to explore some of the underlying reasons for mother-daughter tension, as well as strategies for ensuring that your mother-daughter relationship survives and thrives through the teen years – strategies that need to start long before adolescence.
❉ GIRLS AND STRESS: A CONVERSATION ABOUT TEEN STRESS WITH PSYCHOLOGIST AND AUTHOR DR. RONI COHEN-SANDLER. When young girls enter adolescence, they report high levels of stress and self-doubt about school, extracurricular activities, friendships and their appearance. What factors contribute to teen stress and how is it different for girls and boys? Most important, what can we do to ease the stress and help our girls find more joy and confidence during this important time in their lives? Psychologist Dr. Roni Cohen-Sandler joins Marti & Erin for a heartfelt exploration of the complicated lives of girls today.
Pregnancy and the postpartum period can be a time of excitement and joy and a time of stress, fatigue, and overwhelm. For many parents, postpartum depression and anxiety can make the early months of parenting a new child more challenging. With 1 in 5 new mothers and 1 in 10 new fathers struggling with postpartum depression or anxiety, this is one of the most common birth complications. The good news is that there are many things you can do to prevent or cope with postpartum mental health challenges.
Psychologist Gabrielle Mauren, PhD, and psychiatrist Michelle Wiersgalla, MD, join Marti and Erin to discuss their new book, Myself again: The PARENTS Postpartum Survival Guide. Learn tips for coping during the early months of parenting an infant. Whether or not you are experiencing anxiety, depression, or the baby blues, Mauren & Wiersgalla outline their approach to staying healthy throughout the postpartum period. They also discuss what to do if you are struggling. Whether you are becoming a parent for the first time or giving birth to or adopting a subsequent child, you won't want to miss this Mom Enough episode.
WHAT DID YOU LEARN ABOUT THE POSTPARTUM PERIOD IN THIS EPISODE? Which of the PARENTS method approaches are you most likely to implement? How might you begin to practice patience? What might you do to get more rest and sleep? Who in your community can you enlist as part of your support network?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT POSTPARTUM MENTAL HEALTH?
❉ MYSELF AGAIN: THE PARENTS POSTPARTUM SURVIVAL GUIDE. Get Gabrielle Mauren & Michelle Wiersgalla's book to learn more about the PARENTS method and practical strategies for self-care to help you get back to feeling like yourself again.
CONFRONTING THE STIGMA OF MATERNAL DEPRESSION: AMY KOPPELMAN ON “A MOUTHFUL OF AIR.” As a young mom, Amy Koppelman struggled with severe postpartum depression, haunted by dark thoughts of what she might do to herself or her child. One unusual part of her recovery was writing a novel about a struggling mom who lived out Amy’s worst fears. Now, 20 years later, that critically-acclaimed novel, A Mouthful of Air, has been re-published and Amy also is screenwriter and director of a new feature-length film by the same name, starring Academy Award-winning actress Amanda Seyfried. Don’t miss this unique and important conversation about an issue so many individuals and families confront!
❉ THE PSYCHOLOGY OF EXERCISE: A DISCUSSION ON THE MENTAL HEALTH BENEFITS OF PHYSICAL ACTIVITY. You know how essential regular exercise is for a healthy heart and strong body. Did you know that exercise and mental health are also closely linked? Discovering the energy and positive mood that exercise provides can be a powerful motivator to make exercise a habit. Dr. Beth Lewis discusses ways to stick to an exercise program, how to help your children make exercise a regular part of their routine and how much exercise we need in order to reap optimal benefits for our physical and mental health.
Does anyone in your family have ADHD? If so, do you often feel frustrated by their indecisiveness, disorganization, lack of motivation or difficulty finishing what they start? Dr. Norrine Russell, this week’s Mom Enough guest, understands your frustration and exhaustion.
An ADHD coach and mom of two complex kids with ADHD and other challenges, Dr. Russell first wants you to know that ADHD is not a behavior problem, but a neurodevelopmental disorder; your kids are not just intentionally being “lazy” or “sloppy.” Also, all kids with ADHD are not alike. Some struggle most with starting a task, others with sticking with a task. Some feel paralyzed when they have to make choices among too many options – or figure out where to start when their whole room is pure chaos. But Dr. Russell also knows there are evidence-based practices that can help your child learn to live better with ADHD. And there are professionals who can determine the treatment and supportive strategies that will be most appropriate for your child. There are several people in Marti & Erin’s family who have ADHD, so they were soaking up Dr. Russell’s wisdom and practical tips. They think you will be too!
DID THIS EPISODE CHALLENGE YOUR BELIEFS ABOUT ADHD? Why did Dr. Russell say it’s a mistake to think of ADHD as a behavioral problem? Think of people you know who have ADHD, children or adults. What are the different ways their neurodevelopmental disorder shows up in their everyday life? What kind of treatment, coaching or support have they had and how has that helped?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT ADHD?
❉ THE PLACE OF MEDICATIONS IN CHILDREN’S TREATMENT. As parents, we often have strong reactions to the idea of medicating children because of emotional or behavioral problems. But, as this Mom Enough guest knows, medicating children sometimes can free them to learn and play and thrive. Dr. Elizabeth Reeve joins Marti & Erin for a thoughtful and informative discussion about the proper place of medication in a child’s treatment, how to explain the need for medication to the child, and how to head off inappropriate use of these prescription drugs.
❉ HOW ART HELPED DAV PILKEY RISE ABOVE ADHD & DYSLEXIA: HOPEFUL INSIGHTS FROM THE AUTHOR OF THE CAPTAIN UNDERPANTS AND DOG MAN SERIES. Dav Pilkey was a self-described trouble-maker in the early years of school, often ending up alone in the hallway when his teacher had had enough. Struggling with both reading and attention, Dav passed his time by drawing cartoons of the colorful characters in his imagination – a superhero named Captain Underpants was created in 2nd grade! Dav describes how he eventually became an avid reader and a highly successful author and artist whose books have engaged countless kids, including many reluctant readers. Dav’s story and his wise advice will inspire you whether or not your own children struggle as Dav did.
Family mealtime and the conversation that goes along with it provide longterm benefits for children and teens. These include better physical health, stronger parent-child relationships, better school performance, lower risk of substance abuse, better vocabulary, and greater resilience. But many families struggle to get everyone at the table at the same time, let alone prepare a healthy meal or have a meaningful or entertaining conversation. Busy schedules, both for parents and kids, are one major obstacle to family mealtime, but families also cite picky eaters and the distractions of devices as challenges.
The Family Dinner Project, a nonprofit initiative based in Boston, has been helping families overcome those obstacles for ten years, helping families find fun and laughter at the same time. They recently released Eat, Laugh,Talk: The Family Dinner Playbook, a cookbook (and much more!) that has Marti & Erin excited to use it with their family. Dr. Anne Fishel, Executive Director of The Family Dinner Project, joins Marti & Erin to explore creative ways families can schedule family mealtime and make it interesting and fun. In addition to directing this nonprofit, Anne also is an Associate Clinical Professor in the Harvard Medical School and Director of the Family and Couple Therapy Program at Massachusetts General Hospital. Reflecting on that experience, Anne affirms the value of family mealtime, saying with a laugh, “If more families had family dinner, I think I’d be out of business as a family therapist.”
DO YOU LONG FOR FAMILY MEALS & CONVERSATION THAT GO BEYOND FROZEN PIZZA AND "HOW WAS YOUR DAY?" What things help or hinder you from having family mealtimes on a regular basis? What ideas did you hear in this Mom Enough discussion that might help you increase the frequency of family mealtime in your household? What conversation starters or games sounded like they might be fun to try with your family?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT FAMILY MEALS?
❉ THE BENEFITS OF FAMILY MEALS AND HOW TO MAKE THEM HAPPEN. Erin shares in her blog post for Natural Mental Health, 5 strategies for making family meals happen.
❉ HOW TO KEEP FOOD FUN. Check out these ideas to help you keep your child excited about new foods.
❉ HEALTHY EATING FOR PARENTS AND KIDS. Read these tips for some healthy diet ideas for your whole family.
As a young mom, Amy Koppelman struggled with severe postpartum depression, haunted by dark thoughts of what she might do to herself or her child. One unusual part of her recovery was writing a novel about a struggling mom who lived out Amy’s worst fears.
Now, 20 years later, that critically-acclaimed novel, A Mouthful of Air, has been re-published and Amy also is screenwriter and director of a new feature-length film by the same name, starring Academy Award-winning actress Amanda Seyfried. Both the book and the Sony film are just part of Amy’s passionate effort to reduce the stigma of mental illness and increase understanding of maternal depression and how friends and family can support mothers in their recovery. Don’t miss this unique and important conversation about an issue so many individuals and families confront!
HAVE YOU OR SOMEONE CLOSE TO YOU EXPERIENCED MATERNAL DEPRESSION? How did friends and family respond? And, to what extent were those responses helpful? In what ways do you think social media, with so many staged images of “perfectly happy moms,” may make it even harder for women to admit feelings of anxiety and depression?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT MATERNAL DEPRESSION? ❉ MATERNAL DEPRESSION AND ANXIETY: ESSENTIAL INFORMATION ABOUT INCIDENCE, IMPACT AND TREATMENT. It’s important for all of us to understand the signs of maternal depression and anxiety, safe and effective treatment options and how family and friends can help. Psychiatrist Michelle Wiersgalla and psychologist Gabrielle Mauren join Marti & Erin for an informative and candid discussion everyone should hear.
Have you worried that kids are hooked on instant gratification because of all the time they spend using fast-paced technology? Many of us parents wonder about the impact of the ever-present devices that are such a big part of life in today’s world. Indeed, we should consider both the potential benefits and dangers of screen time. But, we also should be open to research that challenges some of our assumptions and expectations about kids today.
Stephanie Carlson, Distinguished McKnight Professor in the Institute of Child Development at the University of Minnesota, joins Mart & Erin this week. She talks about a fascinating study that challenges popular beliefs about children’s ability to delay gratification. And, she proposes ideas about what might account for her encouraging findings. Tune in to learn more about her findings on delayed gratification!
WERE YOU SURPRISED BY RESEARCH FINDINGS ON DELAYED GRATIFICATION? What was your reaction to Dr. Carlson’s findings (i.e. was this different than you would have expected?)? Stephanie said she thought increased public awareness about the importance of “executive function” might be having a positive effect on children’s development. What do you know about executive function and where did you learn it?
WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ SUPPORTING YOUR CHILD’S DEVELOPMENT OF “EXECUTIVE FUNCTION” OR SELF-CONTROL: A CONVERSATION WITH DR. STEPHANIE CARLSON. What researchers call “executive function” and most parents call “self-control” encompasses everything from paying attention in class to managing frustration with a difficult project. So how does executive function develop in children? And, what role do we play as parents in promoting good executive function? Tune in to this episode of Mom Enough to learn more about this important topic.
If you are like many moms, you probably have a story you tell yourself about what a “good mom” does. And trying to live up to that story probably leaves you feeling unfulfilled and unproductive at the end of most days, asking yourself, “How can I be so busy and have so little to show for it?” Perhaps you need to live more by doing less and find the joy of missing out!
Tonya Dalton, author and productivity expert, cuts to the chase on these issues in her book The Joy of Missing Out and in her conversation with Marti and Erin, offering practical tips on how to find your purpose (your North star!), clarify your priorities and simplify your life. Here key take-aways include Erin’s favorite, “Every time you say yes, you are saying no to something else,” and Marti’s mantra, “To be truly productive, we need to give our brains a little space to play and explore.” Listen to this lively conversation and then reflect on what you can choose to miss out on so you can savor those things that are truly important to you. You will benefit and so will your children.
WHAT JOY MIGHT YOU FIND IN MISSING OUT? Thinking about the past couple of weeks, what things did you do that led you to ask, “Why did I say yes to this? How is this consistent with my values and purpose?” When you said yes to those activities, what were you saying no to? (For example, fun time with your children, maintaining your own health, getting enough sleep, taking steps toward an important goal.) What do you resolve to do differently in the next couple of weeks?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT WHY IT'S IMPORTANT TO MISS OUT? ❉ WHY "ME TIME" MATTERS: HOW YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN BENEFIT WHEN YOU TAKE TIME TO CARE FOR YOURSELF. As a mom, you may feel guilty when you take time for yourself – enjoy some “ME Time”. You may worry that you’re neglecting your children’s needs if you go out with friends, have a date night with your partner, take time to go to a class, take a nap, exercise or even just relax in a hot bath. But, for many reasons, taking time for yourself can help you be a better mother and help your children be healthier, happier people, now and later. Tune in to learn why this time is so important (and why saying "No" means "Yes" to something else).
❉ The Joy of Missing Out. Check out Tonya Dalton's book and learn more about the joys of missing out.
Most parents can recall a moment when their child threw a tantrum. Perhaps they were frustrated that they didn't get what they wanted and fell to the floor screaming or crying? Or, maybe they missed a nap and simply couldn't handle what was being asked of them? Regardless of the situation, a tantrum may be a perfectly normal response in early childhood, but in time, a child needs to learn healthier ways to express and cope with their emotions. This is called self-regulation, which is the ability to manage attention, thoughts, behaviors and emotions in ways that are acceptable and healthy. So, how can parents support their child in developing healthy self-regulation?
Occupational therapist and health coach, Kate Biederman, from St. David's Center for Child and Family Development joins Marti and Erin for part 2 of a 3-part series on the development of self-regulation in childhood. She discusses the many aspects of self-regulation, from activity regulation to emotional regulation. As Kate shares, adults play an important role in supporting development by being "regulatory partners." Learn how you can join your child in the process of building self-regulation by partnering with them as they begin to develop the skills they need to be happy and healthy. Walk away with a clear understanding of the three big tasks of regulatory partners and tips for implementing these at different ages and stages. You won't want to miss this in-depth discussion on self-regulation.
HOW WILL YOU EMBRACE THE ROLE OF "REGULATORY PARTNER"? Children need regulatory partners who can provide them with support as they develop the ability to regulate their attention, activity, and emotions. What task of regulatory partners are you already embracing and how does that show up in your parenting? Are there tasks you might consider practicing more and, if so, why? How can you model self-regulation for your child at any age?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SELF-REGULATION? ❉ FROM CO-REGULATION TO SELF-REGULATION: PARENT-CHILD INTERACTIONS THAT PREPARE OUR CHILDREN FOR LIFE. Tune into the first episode of the series on self-regulation with Melissa Williams from St. David's Center. Tune into this engaging and practical discussion about what is involved in co-regulation, with an emphasis on how to show, tell and practice together with our children. Melissa also highlights the importance of “rupture and repair,” describing how we can admit our mistakes at those times when we get it wrong with our kids (as we all do!), say we are sorry and tell our child what we will try to do differently the next time.
❉ HELPING CHILDREN WITH ASD IMPROVE REGULATION AND FOCUS AT HOME AND SCHOOL: A CONVERSATION WITH KATE BIEDERMAN FROM ST. DAVID’S CENTER FOR CHILD & FAMILY DEVELOPMENT. As occupational therapist Kate Biederman describes in this Mom Enough episode, some children respond well to deep touch, while others find that aversive. Many children feel calm after they engage in what Kate calls “heavy work,” which includes climbing on a jungle gym or jumping on a mini-trampoline. While noise can be dysregulating, music with certain rhythms can be regulating and organizing. An uncluttered home environment and an unhurried schedule can help almost any child be calmer and more focused. As adults and children discover together what works, children ideally can build the self-awareness and independence to do what’s necessary when they begin to feel dysregulated. As Marti & Erin attest, it’s not only people with ASD who need to develop self-awareness and effective regulation. In our busy, noisy, fast-paced lives, these skills matter to all of us!
❉ DISCOVERING WHAT WILL HELP YOUR CHILD DEVELOP SELF-REGULATION SKILLS: DIFFERENT STROKES FOR DIFFERENT FOLKS. One of the major developmental tasks in early childhood is self-regulation, which includes establishing healthy patterns of eating, sleeping and other routines. Even as older children and adults,
Before you became a parent, how did you envision the way you and your partner would handle parenting responsibilities? Was a vision of "equal partnership" for household and parenting tasks a part of this? To what extent does the actual division of labor match your vision or expectations? If you’re like most families, there is a notable gap between expectations and reality, and that may be fine with you – or not!
Clinical psychologist and author Darcy Lockman, motivated in part by personal experience, has delved deeply into this topic. She brings what she has learned to this fascinating and important conversation with Marti & Erin. She explores assumptions about hormones and of parenting, cultural trends in intensive mothering, peaks and plateaus in active fathering and the often invisible work of the “mental load” of parenting. Most of all, Darcy urges couples to talk together about how they want to parent, especially before becoming parents. But, as Marti & Erin note, if you didn’t start then, start now!
HAVE YOU EXPERIENCED A SENSE OF INEQUALITY OR EQUAL PARTNERSHIP IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP? Make time to reflect (alone and/or with your partner) on how you share the responsibilities of parenting, both the visible and invisible tasks this week’s guest talked about. How do you feel about the equality of how the work is being done? How do you handle those feelings? What would you want to change and how could you begin with small steps, showing respect and sensitivity to your partner’s perceptions and feelings?
WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ ALL THE RAGE: MOTHERS, FATHERS, AND THE MYTH OF EQUAL PARTNERSHIP. Learn more about Darcy Lockman's book!
❉ TO OFTEN, WORKING MOTHERS DO FAR MORE OF THE CHILDCARE THAN THEIR HUSBANDS. Check out this article by Darcy Lockman for TIME.
❉ DON'T BE GRATEFUL THAT DAD DOES HIS SHARE. Check out this article by Darcy Lockman for The Atlantic.
❉ DADS MATTER: THE ROLE OF THE FATHER IN CHILD DEVELOPMENT AND WHAT MOMS CAN DO TO HELP DADS SUCCEED. Check out this Andre Dukes of the Northside Achievement Zone in Minneapolis, joins Marti & Erin to discuss the role of the father in child development, the benefits of father involvement throughout a child’s life and what we all can do to help men be the dads their children need.
Have you had one of those moments when you said the wrong thing to your child? Perhaps a time when you were angry and didn't communicate effectively? Or a distracted moment when you didn't acknowledge your child's feelings? The reality is, sometimes we're just not in the state of mind to communicate in effective ways. But, effective communication is essential for healthy relationships. So, what can we do to improve communication with our child or children? How should we talk with kids so that they will hear us and we will hear them?
William Stixrud, PhD, co-author of What Do You Say? How to Talk with Kids to Build Stress Tolerance, Motivation, and a Happy Home, joins Mom Enough to discuss how to talk with your children. He shares the importance of effective communication, how to increase the likelihood that your child will actually hear what you are trying to say, and how you can help your child understand their own thoughts and find their own reasons to change. You won't want to miss this insightful episode!
WHAT WILL YOU DO TO COMMUNICATE MORE EFFECTIVELY WITH YOUR CHILD? Children listen better when they feel heard. What can you do to show empathy for your child? What step(s) will you take to listen without judgement? We can't communicate effectively when we're mad. So, next time you're angry with your child, how will you remind yourself to take a step back and save the communication for a time when you're not angry?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT COMMUNICATION? ❉ HOW YOU SAY IT: A LOOK AT LINGUISTICS WITH KATHERINE KINZLER, PHD. How do children learn language? What role does language play in prejudice? And, how can language play a role in how we fare emotionally and socially during the pandemic? Katherine Kinzler, author of How You Say It: Why You Talk the Way You Do and What It Says about You, addresses these questions and more in this thought-provoking interview with Marti and Erin of Mom Enough.
❉ LEARNING A SECOND LANGUAGE, LEARNING THROUGH LANGUAGE: A CONVERSATION WITH U OF M RESEARCHER MELISSA KOENIG. Very young children have a remarkable capacity to learn whatever language (or languages) they hear. But as we get older, we often struggle at learning a second language and may never “speak like a native” (as Marti learned years ago trying to order a beer in Sweden!). Why is that so? And, as parents, what should we do to support our children’s language development in both their primary language and second and third languages? You won’t want to miss this fascinating and helpful discussion with U of M Researcher Melissa Koenig of a topic of great importance in today’s diverse world.
❉ EFFECTIVE LANGUAGE STIMULATION FOR CHILDREN: BUILDING RICH LANGUAGE LEARNING INTO EVERYDAY LIFE, USING YOUR PRIMARY LANGUAGE AND CULTURAL TRADITIONS. You’ve heard how crucial parents are to children’s language development, but does that prompt you to think, “Oh, no, one more thing I have to do!” If so, this Mom Enough guest will ease your mind with great tips on how to work effective language stimulation into things you already are doing.
❉ YOU’RE WEARING THAT? DEBORAH TANNEN ON MOTHERS AND DAUGHTERS. Mother-daughter relationships can be one of the most powerful yet also one of the more challenging relationships. Why is this relationship so rewarding? Why do mothers and daughters critique each other on the “Big Three” topics – hair, clothes, and weight? What other aspects of the mother-daughter relationship can make it so challenging? And, how can mothers and daughters meet that challenge? New York Times bestselling author and Georgetown University professor, Deborah Tannen, joins three generations of Mom Enough (Marti, Erin & Clara) to answer these questions and more!
Babies and young children are learning and doing new things every day. But parents often worry that their child’s development isn’t quite the same as the child next door. Or, perhaps they notice that their child’s development seems slower in one area than another (walking early, for example, but not beginning to say words). There is a wide range of what’s normal in early childhood, and it’s not unusual for a child to develop at different rates in different domains. Nonetheless, it’s a good idea to check out concerns.
The good news is that there are free resources to help you know if your child’s development is on track. These resources include online, research-based information about developmental milestones, as well as early childhood screening (free for any young child). If screening identifies a possible problem and further assessment shows that your child qualifies, free early intervention services are available. These supports are tailored to your child’s needs and your preferences (with services available, for example, in your home or even online). In this episode of Mom Enough, Anna Paulson, Program Coordinator for Help Me Grow Minnesota, brings a wealth of information and practical ideas for how you can understand and support your child’s optimal development. And she makes a strong case for how early intervention can make a lifelong difference for a child’s learning and development.
IS YOUR CHILD'S DEVELOPMENT ON TRACK? Visit the Help Me Grow website and take a look at the information and videos on developmental milestones for a child the age of yours. What does this suggest about how your child is learning and developing in different areas (motor, language, cognitive, social-emotional)? What ideas did you get from guest Anna Paulson about how to support your child’s development at home?
IS YOUR CHILD MEETING THEIR DEVELOPMENTAL MILESTONES? ❉ Help Me Grow. Check out Help Me Grow MN for information on developmental milestones, encouraging healthy development, and getting help if you have concerns about a child's development. You can also find Help Me Grow on Facebook and Instagram (developmental videos).
❉ CDC on Developmental Milestones. Check out the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's resources on child development. Track your child's development and get a downloadable PDF with developmental information by age. You can also learn about the Milestone Tracker app for monitoring your child's development.
❉ Minnesota Learn the Signs Act Early. Minnesota Act Early is an outreach campaign that promotes early screening and identification of potential developmental delays. Get information on healthy development, early signs of Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and other developmental delays, and early intervention options.
You know how essential regular exercise is for a healthy heart and strong body, but do you know that exercise and mental health are also closely linked? Discovering the energy and positive mood that exercise provides can become a powerful motivator to make exercise a habit.
Dr. Beth Lewis, psychologist and Director of the School of Kinesiology in the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development, conducts research on how to motivate people to exercise regularly. And recently, she has been studying the effects of exercise on depression in pregnant and postpartum women. Drawing her research on exercise and mental health, Beth joins Marti & Erin for an informative and motivating conversation about ways to stick to an exercise program, how to help your children make exercise a regular part of their routine and how much exercise we need in order to reap optimal benefits for our physical and mental health.
HOW WILL YOU USE EXERCISE TO IMPROVE YOUR MENTAL HEALTH? How much exercise do you get in a typical week? How about your kids? And how does that measure up to the most recent guidelines, described by Dr. Beth Lewis in this podcast? Think of three small steps you could take to enhance the way exercise is integrated into your family’s daily life.
WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ College of Education + Human Development
❉ Exercise Pregnancy Study, Healthy Mom Program
❉ Physical activity guidelines for during pregnancy and postpartum
❉ Healthy moms article by Dr. Beth Lewis
❉ Maintaining Your Mental Health –For Your Sake and Your Children’s by Marti Erickson
Do you have a teen about to start college? Or, is there a college-aged young adult you know who might benefit from some helpful tips on how to stay healthy or get healthier? Or, are you looking for a one-stop, comprehensive resource on college health? Whether you have a child just starting college who is looking to prevent the "freshman 15" or a young adult upperclassmen seeking to avoid the risks of alcohol use, you won't want to miss next week's Mom Enough show!
Tune in as authors Jill and Dave Henry join Erin and her daughter, Clara (a high school senior amid her college search) for an honest and to-the point discussion on college health. Listen to some true (and perhaps surprising) stories about college students' experiences with the transition to college. Get tips on avoiding college weight gain, preventing the pitfalls of alcohol use, reducing stress, and getting adequate sleep. Walk away with wisdom from the Henrys' accessible book, The Greatest College Health Guide You Never Knew You Needed.
WHAT WILL YOU DO TO ENSURE YOUR CHILD'S HEALTH IN COLLEGE? What were you most surprised about when it came to the insights from college students' about their transition to college? What tips from this episode are you most likely to share with your college-age child? How will you support your child in managing stress?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT COLLEGE HEALTH & PARENTING A COLLEGE STUDENT? ❉ HOW COLLEGE MAKES OR BREAKS US. Best-selling author Paul Tough spent six years exploring colleges in 21 states. He interviewed faculty, SAT tutors and students from all walks of life, concluding that higher education as an engine of social mobility is breaking down. He joins Marti & Erin in this episode to discuss highlights of what he learned and to offer action steps for college admissions, alumni, and public officials who make decisions on higher education funding.
❉ PARENTING COLLEGE STUDENTS: A FREE ONLINE RESOURCE FOR ALL PARENTS. It’s a big change for parents when children begin college. Parenting college students is a new phase of parenting! If our kids go away to school, we may wonder what is really going on in their lives. Jodi Dworkin and Marjorie Savage from the University of Minnesota's College of Education and Human Development (CEHD) put their knowledge and experience to work in developing a rich new website, Parenting College Students, to help parents of college students wherever they are. Marti & Erin are glad to know this website will be here for them when the next generation in their family head to college!
Having a strong, stable internet connection and up-to-date equipment is more important today than ever. Connectivity is essential for children’s school success, parents’ access to information about health and safety, health and mental health services that often are delivered virtually. Social connections for all family members, especially as the uncertainty of the pandemic continues, is another important reason for internet access. Yet, too many children and families still lack the connection they need. So what are the factors that account for this lack of digital equity? And what are solutions at the level of individual families, schools, other organizations and communities as a whole?
In this week’s episode of Mom Enough, Stacey Nelson Kumar, Director of Community Impact for Comcast Twin Cities Region, joins Marti & Erin for an important discussion of the barriers to digital equity. She shares creative solutions that are making it possible for Twin Cities families and children, whatever their income or background, to get connected in their homes and throughout the community. Learn about Internet Essentials for families, Comcast’s Partnership Programs that meet people where they are, and more than 70 free Lift Zones throughout the metro area. Most important, learn how you or people you know can take advantage of these initiatives. And, if you don’t live in the Twin Cities or Minnesota, get ideas for how your own community might engage internet providers in stepping up to promote digital equity.
WHAT CAN YOU DO TO ADDRESS DIGITAL EQUITY? What are some of the barriers to digital equity Stacey Nelson Kumar identified in this Mom Enough discussion? What did you learn about solutions at the family level? At the level of schools or other community organizations? If you live in the Twin Cities Metro area, how could you or others you know benefit from programs such as Internet Essentials, the Partnership Program or the more than 70 Lift Zones in this community?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT DIGITAL ACCESS? ❉ MOM ENOUGH LIVE: WIRED FOR SUCCESS. Tune in to the second Mom Enough Live discussion on removing barriers to internet access for online learning with co-hosts, Dr. Erin Erickson and Dr. Marti Erickson, and guest expert, Stacey Nelson-Kumar of Comcast. Learn about digital equity, how Comcast is connecting low-income families with internet through their Internet Essentials program, how you can find out if you qualify for low-cost internet, and what you can do to help families in the community get connected!
❉ MOM ENOUGH LIVE: MANAGING SCREEN TIME DURING COVD-19. Tune in to the third Mom Enough Live discussion on managing screen time during the pandemic with co-hosts, Dr. Erin Erickson and Dr. Marti Erickson, and guest expert, Jill Hornbacher of Comcast. Learn about parents’ biggest concerns about their children’s internet use, how the pandemic has changed screen time usage, why it’s difficult to stay on top of your family’s internet use, how parents can manage screen time, and what resources will help parents do this at home.
❉ MONITORING AND MANAGING YOUR CHILDREN’S SCREEN TIME. Mom Enough partnered with Comcast to let you know about new resources for monitoring and managing your children’s screen time. But the innovative Xfinity xFi system gives you a simple way to use your phone to monitor WiFi use, set parental controls, pause access to WiFi on your home network and much more — even when you are not at home! Learn more in video.
❉ SCREEN TIME IN EARLY CHILDHOOD: CONCERNS, OPPORTUNITIES AND REALISTIC GUIDELINES. In a world dominated by electronic devices, many of us worry about the longterm impact on our children, especially those who get hooked on screen time at an early age. What is a good age to introduce screens? How much time is too much? To what extent are very young children learning useful things from screen time? Dr. Megan Gunnar, a world-renown expert from the University of M...
When people ask author and educational psychologist Michele Borba what kids need to be successful and happy, she confidently proclaims, “Empathy!” And yet, our popular culture, with its emphasis on “I” and “me” seems to fly in the face of empathy as a core value. We've all seen kids and adults alike constantly snapping “selfies” to document their every move.
How did we come to this? To what extent has addiction to devices contributed to the decrease in empathy observed by researchers? What other factors have contributed to these changes? Most importantly, what can we do now as parents, teachers and other caring adults to make sure children build this important quality of empathy from the earliest years? Dr. Borba joins Marti & Erin for a rich discussion in this week’s Mom Enough episode, offering practical strategies for putting empathy front and center in your child’s life and in the life of your whole family.
HOW WILL YOU HELP YOUR CHILD "UNSELFIE"? In this discussion, what practical ideas did you hear that you could use this week with your children, whatever their ages? Michele Borba talks about establishing your family’s “moral identity.” What words would you and your family use to describe “who we are as a family”?
WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ RAISING FEMINIST BOYS: DR. BOBBI WEGNER DISCUSSES GENDER, SEX & EMPATHY. Psychologist and author, Dr. Bobbi Wegner joins Marti & Erin for a compelling conversation on the importance of teaching our children — and especially our sons — about sex, consent, identity, gender, and empathy.
❉ NURTURING YOUR CHILD’S EMPATHY, INFANCY TO ADULTHOOD. In this episode of Mom Enough, Dr. Megan Gunnar, professor in the University of Minnesota’s Institute of Child Development, joins Marti & Erin to discuss early signs of empathy in infancy, the growing capacity for it in the toddler period, and simple, practical tips for parents.
❉ THE DANISH WAY OF PARENTING: AN INTERVIEW WITH JESSICA JOELLE ALEXANDER. Tune into this Mom Enough episode with Jessica Joelle Alexander, best-selling author of The Danish Way of Parenting: What the Happiest People in the World Know About Raising Confident, Capable Kids. Listen and learn why ultimatums aren’t helpful and why empathy, “equal dignity” and happy times together are key to raising self-assured and joyful children.
Who do you picture when you think of someone with an eating disorder? If you are like many people, you envision a young, underweight, white female. But eating disorders affect people regardless of age, ethnicity, gender or body type. And, as parents, we are key to recognizing the signs of a possible problem in our child, seeking appropriate help and supporting our child’s journey to a positive body image and healthy eating.
Claire Mysko, an internationally recognized expert on eating disorders and body image, joins Marti & Erin in this week’s episode of Mom Enough for an important conversation about this problem that touches so many lives. Along with her professional expertise, Claire also brings the compassion and wisdom that comes from having suffered with an eating disorder herself. Listen and share with other parents you know!
WHAT STEPS WILL YOU TAKE TO PREVENT YOUR CHILD FROM DEVELOPING AN EATING DISORDER? Thinking about what you heard in this discussion about eating disorders and body image, what examples do you notice in every day conversation, school policies or media messages that could feed into the negative body image so many young people experience today? To what extent have you experienced these issues in your own life, and how have you handled those feelings? What can you learn from that experience to help prevent your daughters and sons from struggling with similar issues?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT EATING DISORDERS? ❉ National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA)
❉ NEDA's toll-free and confidential helpline
❉ Claire Mysko's blog and books
❉ Eating Disorders: Symptoms, Treatment & Risks
❉What are Eating Disorders?
Mother-daughter relationships can be one of the most powerful yet also one of the more challenging relationships. Why is this relationship so rewarding? Why do mothers and daughters critique each other on the "Big Three" topics - hair, clothes, and weight? What other aspects of the mother-daughter relationship can make it so challenging? And, how can mothers and daughters meet that challenge?
New York Times bestselling author and Georgetown University professor, Deborah Tannen, joins three generations of Mom Enough (Marti, Erin & Clara) to answer these questions and more! The author of numerous books, including You're Wearing THAT? Tannen offers wise insights on improving communication and making the mother-daughter relationship stronger. Tune in and walk away with a better understanding of this important relationship and how to make it better!
WHAT INSIGHTS ABOUT MOTHERS & DAUGHTERS RESONATED MOST WITH YOU? What might you do to strengthen your relationship with your mother or daughter? In what ways did you recognize your own mother-daughter relationship in this episode?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT MOTHERS & DAUGHTERS? ❉ THE MOTHER-DAUGHTER BOND: WHAT WE TELL – OR DON’T TELL – OUR DAUGHTERS AND WHY IT MATTERS. We may not realize that what we do not say to our daughters, particularly about their bodies and the ordinary experiences of womanhood, may have far-reaching effects on their confidence across all aspects of their lives. Joyce McFadden, psychoanalyst and lead researcher on the ongoing Women’s Realities Study, joins Marti & Erin to discuss some of the thought-provoking findings on the mother-daughter bond from her research and clinical practice.
While many of us might cringe at the thought of talking to our children about sex, consent, and identity, these are topics we are wise to delve into. So, why is it so hard for parents to talk to kids about these important concepts? And, when it comes to our sons, where and how do we begin talking about gender, consent, sex, identity and empathy? And why are these conversations important to raising feminist boys? Is there any way to feel less uncomfortable when we talk about sex with our children? Is there a best way to have these conversations? Tune in to this week's show for answers to these questions and more!
Psychologist and author, Dr. Bobbi Wegner joins Marti & Erin for a compelling conversation on the importance of teaching our children -- and especially our sons -- about sex, consent, identity, gender, and empathy. In the age of #MeToo, it's especially important to know how to engage our sons in becoming empathetic men who contribute in positive ways to the lives of women and, of course, to their communities too. The author of Raising Feminist Boys: How to Talk with Your Child about Gender, Consent, and Empathy and a mom herself, Bobbi shares insights into how we might approach these subjects and whether we should approach them differently with our sons and daughters. Tune in as she demystifies these sometimes sticky subjects!
WHAT STEPS MIGHT YOU TAKE TO RAISE A FEMINIST BOY? How will you begin talking with your son about gender, consent, sex, identity and empathy? What can you do to model empathy for your sons and daughters? How might you overcome some of the awkwardness of these conversations, so you can support your children in becoming healthy adults?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT EMPATHY, CONSENT, AND TALKING WITH CHILDREN ABOUT SEX? ❉ TEACHING CHILDREN ABOUT CONSENT: RIGHTS, RESPECT AND NO REGRETS. The concept of consent has been in the news a lot in recent years. But, understanding consent is important long before children reach adolescence. Christy Keating, prosecutor turned parenting coach, joins Marti & Erin for an informative discussion on this important aspect of parenting.
❉ TEACHING OUR CHILDREN ABOUT SEX, LOVE AND EQUALITY. Author Bonnie Rough discovered some surprising lessons about sex education while living in the Netherlands when her children were very young. Ultimately, she learned this is about much more than sex; it is about healthy relationships, grounded in love, respect and equality. Check out this episode to learn more.
❉ TALKING ABOUT THE BIRDS AND THE BEES TO KEEP KIDS SAFE IN AN ONLINE WORLD. Tune in to hear Amy Lang, sexual health educator, discuss how and when to start the birds and the bees conversation (it’s earlier than you might think), how to avoid TMI (too much information), and simple things that we can do to keep our children safe.
Are you struggling to make ends meet? Or living paycheck-to-paycheck? Or simply looking to save more? If so, you won't want to miss this week's episode, which is full of tips to help you budget and take charge of your personal finances.
As a broke, newly married college student, personal finance expert Jesse Mecham developed a simple budgeting method to help people get out of debt and save more money. What started as a spreadsheet soon turned into You Need A Budget (aka YNAB), an app and online tool to help people gain total control of their money. Mecham joins Erin & Marti this week to share his Four Rules of budgeting that can help us stress less and save more. Learn about zero-based budgeting, strategies for managing finances with a partner, and when and how to start teaching your children about money. After listening to this episode, you might just rethink that sushi dinner tomorrow night! We are pleased to welcome YNAB as a new supporting partner of Mom Enough.
WHAT STEPS WILL YOU TAKE TO START BUDGETING? What strategies will you apply to budget with your partner or on your own? How might you start teaching your children to budget? Why is scarcity important for bringing clarity? What can you do to embrace your true expenses?
WANT TO LEARN MORE PERSONAL FINANCE OR BUDGETING? ❉You Need A Budget (or YNAB) is an award-winning personal finance app and proven method to help you gain total control of your money and build wealth. Learn four simple rules to stop living paycheck-to-paycheck, get out of debt, and save more money. Try it for 34-days free (no credit card required) here.
❉ ENGAGING KIDS IN FAMILY MONEY DECISIONS. Nathan Dungan joins Marti & Erin to discuss ways to clarify your own values about money, instill those values in your children, and give your kids voice and choice in family money decisions.
From the earliest months of a baby’s life to the academic pressures and social dynamics of the teen years, children are learning and practicing how to understand and manage feelings, communicate their needs effectively and face challenges with strength and resilience. They are building “self-regulation,” the ability to calm down when they are upset and control the impulse to lash out in risky ways. And they are learning to try again when they fail or to use their best thinking to resolve a conflict or solve a difficult problem. But all of those skills that are part of self-regulation begin with “co-regulation,” in the context of a caring, responsive parent-infant relationship.
Joining our child in co-regulation is one of the most important responsibilities we have as parents, not only in the early years, but at every stage of our child’s development. In this Mom Enough episode, Melissa Williams from St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development (a longtime supporting partner of Mom Enough), joins Marti & Erin for an engaging and practical discussion about what is involved in co-regulation, with an emphasis on how to show, tell and practice together with our children. Melissa also highlights the importance of “rupture and repair,” describing how we can admit our mistakes at those times when we get it wrong with our kids (as we all do!), say we are sorry and tell our child what we will try to do differently the next time. And since kids learn best from the example we set, we need to be mindful at all times of our own self-regulation in those challenging moments of our lives. Don’t miss this important conversation about a developmental issue that touches every aspect of human behavior and relationships.
HOW MIGHT YOU JOIN YOUR CHILD IN CO-REGULATION? Whatever the ages of your children, think of two or three recent opportunities you have had to join your child in co-regulation of difficult feelings or situations. Consider how you responded to your child in each of those instances and reflect on how you were co-regulating your child’s feelings; how your way of responding is likely to help your child move toward healthy self-regulation. If the same situation happened again, what would you do the same and what would you do differently? Why?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT CO-REGULATION AND SELF-REGULATION? ❉ HELPING CHILDREN WITH ASD IMPROVE REGULATION AND FOCUS AT HOME AND SCHOOL: A CONVERSATION WITH KATE BIEDERMAN FROM ST. DAVID’S CENTER FOR CHILD & FAMILY DEVELOPMENT. As occupational therapist Kate Biederman describes in this Mom Enough episode, some children respond well to deep touch, while others find that aversive. Many children feel calm after they engage in what Kate calls “heavy work,” which includes climbing on a jungle gym or jumping on a mini-trampoline. While noise can be dysregulating, music with certain rhythms can be regulating and organizing. An uncluttered home environment and an unhurried schedule can help almost any child be calmer and more focused. As adults and children discover together what works, children ideally can build the self-awareness and independence to do what’s necessary when they begin to feel dysregulated. As Marti & Erin attest, it’s not only people with ASD who need to develop self-awareness and effective regulation. In our busy, noisy, fast-paced lives, these skills matter to all of us!
❉ DISCOVERING WHAT WILL HELP YOUR CHILD DEVELOP SELF-REGULATION SKILLS: DIFFERENT STROKES FOR DIFFERENT FOLKS. One of the major developmental tasks in early childhood is self-regulation, which includes settling into reasonably predictable and healthy patterns of eating, sleeping and other routines. Even as older children and adults, we are dysregulated at times, which can disrupt learning, good relationships and other aspects of our lives. Robin Campbell and Cheryl Lundsgaard from St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development, shed light on what self-regulation means,
In what ways do babies and very young children experience the negative effects of racism? When do children become aware of skin color or other ways they are the same as or different from their peers?
In this episode of Mom Enough, sponsored by supporting partner Help Me Grow Minnesota, Erin and Marti talk with Andre Dukes, Vice President of Family and Community Impact at Northside Achievement Zone in Minneapolis, about factors that enable children of color to build a positive identity from the earliest months and years of life. That can’t happen without all of us doing our part, so the discussion zooms in on how we can support all young children in getting to know, respect and appreciate others, whatever their skin color and ethnic or cultural background. First, we need to recognize that race is not a scientific concept, but a social construct created to colonize and control people. Yet, that construct somehow influences children as early as two years, when too many children have absorbed the idea that “white” is better than “Black.”
Listen to what research shows about babies as young as six months developing an awareness of skin color, the meaning they make of that as toddlers, and the words and actions of others that shape children’s judgments of self and other. Then join Andre, Marti and Erin in thinking about what parents, educators and anyone who wants strong, healthy, safe communities can do now to make sure all children being born today learn a better way to live in our diverse world.
WHAT SURPRISES YOU ABOUT THE DEVELOPMENT OF RACIAL IDENTITY IN EARLY CHILDHOOD? In this discussion with Andre Dukes, what surprised you about what babies and toddlers discover and learn about the meaning of skin color and race? In what ways do you try to promote positive attitudes and behaviors related to skin color and different ethnic or cultural backgrounds? What ideas did you hear that you could put into practice with babies and young children in your family, classroom, place of worship or community?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT RACISM OR RAISING EMPATHETIC CHILDREN? ❉ “THE TALK”: HOW PARENTS PROTECT THEIR BLACK CHILDREN FROM RACISM. Andre Dukes discusses the necessity of “the talk,” which he describes as Black parents, or parents of Black children, “preparing their children to enter into this world where they are unfairly judged and stereotyped.” He shares personal reflections, gives tips for protecting Black children’s innocence while making them aware of the dangers they face due to racism, and calls on all parents, regardless of race, to teach their children empathy and the importance of standing up when they see injustice. Tune in to hear the wisdom and critical insights of a leading parenting expert in Minneapolis, Andre Dukes.
❉ MOTHERHOOD SO WHITE: A DISCUSSION ON RACE, ADOPTION, AND PARENTING IN TODAY’S WORLD. What can a mother do when she doesn’t see herself in the pages of parenting books? Or when the resources don’t address her greatest concerns? As a single Black woman who chose to become a mother through adoption, author Nefertiti Austin took to writing her own experiences in her critically acclaimed memoir, Motherhood So White: A Memoir of Race, Gender and Parenting in America. Tune into this poignant episode of Mom Enough.
❉ NURTURING YOUR CHILD’S EMPATHY, INFANCY TO ADULTHOOD. In this episode of Mom Enough, Dr. Megan Gunnar, professor in the University of Minnesota’s Institute of Child Development, joins Marti & Erin to discuss early signs of empathy in infancy, the growing capacity for compassionate empathy in the toddler period, and simple, practical ways parents can encourage and expand children’s empathy in everyday interactions at every stage.
Mom Enough co-hosts Marti & Erin found this discussion on raising boys with Dr. Michael Reichert to be one of the most thoughtful and important episodes they have done. Drawing on his personal story of the death of his brother, his extensive research on boys around the world and his years of clinical experience with boys longing to be heard, this psychologist and highly respected author makes the case that, in his words, “Too many boys lose their intimate connections and emotional voices early in their lives.” But it doesn’t have to be that way, and Dr. Reichert offers practical guidance whether you are the parent of a lively preschooler, a 5th-grader trying to succeed in school or a teenager trying to navigate the turbulent waters of romance and sexuality or grappling with disturbing pornographic images on the internet. Tune in to learn key insights from Dr. Reichert's book, How to Raise a Boy: The Power of Connection to Build Good Men.
BOYS AND GIRLS ARE NOT AS DIFFERENT AS WE SOMETIMES THINK.
If you listen carefully, you are likely to discover that boys and girls are not as different as we sometimes think. We all long for trust, respect, connection. We all long for our needs and feelings to be heard and acknowledged. And when we provide those things to both our sons and daughters, the world will be better for the men and women they become.
REFLECT ON HOW YOU WILL BEGIN RAISING BOYS DIFFERENTLY.
This week’s Mom Enough guest, Dr. Michael Reichert, says in this discussion, “The problem is not boys, but the boyhood we have built.” What examples can you think of that illustrate this point? What concrete steps could you take to begin to build a better boyhood for the boys in your life, whatever their ages? What one thing will you change in how you are raising your son(s), so they will grow up to be compassionate and caring adults?
WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ Check out Dr. Reichert's book, How to Raise a Boy: The Power of Connection to Build Good Men, to learn more about raising boys.
❉ HELPING OUR CHILDREN BUILD SELF-COMPASSION: KEYS TO KINDNESS, GRATITUDE AND COMPASSION FOR OTHERS. We’ve all heard the question, “What kind of world are we leaving for our children?” But Dr. Shilagh Mirgain, a health and sport psychologist at the University of Wisconsin, turns that question on its head and asks, “What kind of children are we leaving for our world?” Whatever the ages of your children, don’t miss this inspiring and practical discussion of how to help your children develop compassion for themselves and others, recognizing the common humanity, vulnerability and imperfection we all share. Learn concrete steps you can take today to help your children be more grateful, kind and mindful in their daily lives.
❉ PROMOTING HEALTHY MANHOOD: WISDOM FROM THE AUTHORS OF THE BOOK OF DARES. Ted Bunch and Anna Marie Johnson Teague are devoting their lives to building a new kind of strong, healthy manhood where boys and men respect themselves and others, treat women as equals and stand up against violence and injustice. Tune in to hear how they are doing this through A Call to Men and an innovative new book for boys, The Book of Dares: 100 Ways for Boys to Be Kind, Bold and Brave.
❉ CUT TO THE QUICK: THE CONSEQUENCES OF RELATIONAL AGGRESSION AMONG OUR SONS & DAUGHTERS. We’ve all heard “mean girl” stories and many of us probably have lived them. But the social rejection and humiliation kids inflict on each other is not unique to girls; in fact, this episode's Mom Enough guest cites evidence that relational aggression is equally common among boys and girls.
Are your kids stressed out by the pressures in our competitive society? Do they worry about grades or test scores? If so, is all that stress worth it? This week’s Mom Enough guest, Dr. Michele Borba, offers a research-based perspective on the factors that are most likely to help kids thrive in school and life – and experience less anxiety at the same time.
Michele has been an educator, educational psychologist and parent for forty years, earning international accolades for her groundbreaking work on parenting, bullying prevention and character development. But in recent years, she’s become increasingly worried about the emotional wellbeing of young people from all backgrounds, particularly the high levels of stress, anxiety and depression so many kids experience. So, she set out to interview hundreds of kids and parents, as well as to consult with top researchers studying factors that illuminate why some kids thrive even in stressful times.
The result is Michele’s latest book, Thrivers: The Surprising Reasons Why Some Kids Struggle and Some Kids Shine, which she discusses with Marti & Erin in this week’s episode of Mom Enough. Her findings challenge the relentless, competitive emphasis on perfect grades and test scores (a “pretty package” as one teen said), noting that such high pressure often undermines focus, learning and emotional health. Most importantly, Michele’s findings highlight instead character traits that can be taught from an early age: self-confidence, empathy, self-control, integrity, curiosity, perseverance (or grit) and optimism. And there is a multiplier effect when those traits work together. Don’t miss this powerful, practical message for parents and anyone who works with or cares about children.
HOW WILL SUPPORT YOUR CHILD TO THRIVE? This week’s guest, Michele Borba, talks about practical ways to model and teach seven key character traits to your children. What stood out for you about her discussion of these traits and ways to teach them? If you were to come up with a family motto (highlighting who you want to be or how you want to be remembered), as Dr. Borba suggests, what would it be?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT THRIVERS OR DR. MICHELE BORBA? ❉ CHALLENGES & OPPORTUNITIES: WHAT BRAIN DEVELOPMENT SCIENCE TELLS US ABOUT HELPING ADOLESCENTS THRIVE. As parents, we often roll our eyes at the thought of our children becoming adolescents. How will we (and our children) survive this difficult period of development? But well-known author Dr. Laurence Steinberg has spent decades studying adolescents and has arrived at a much more positive view of what he terms The Age of Opportunity (the title of his latest book). He joins Marti & Erin for a rich and hopeful discussion of how recent research on adolescent brain development can inform the ways we guide our teens to a healthy, happy, productive adulthood. ❉ DIVORCE AND CHILDREN: HELPING CHILDREN THRIVE DURING AND AFTER DIVORCE. When parents divorce, children typically experience a wide range of feelings, including loss, sadness, fear, anger and anxiety. These feelings come out in different ways, depending on age, personality and circumstances. But there are many things parents and other caring adults can do to help children cope and even thrive beyond this challenging time. Child psychologist Dr. Jordan Hart joins Marti & Erin for a rich discussion of divorce and children, a topic that affects so many families.
Most of us have heard general advice to avoid alcohol and other toxic substances during pregnancy. But what about a pregnant woman who is addicted to alcohol? Opioids? Heroin? How might withdrawal harm the mom or baby? What medications could reduce the woman’s cravings and which of those, if any, are safe for the growing baby? And how about the impact on babies of legal marijuana, which some dispensaries recommend to relieve nausea in early pregnancy?
These questions and more are the focus of Marti & Erin’s interview with Dr. Alta DeRoo, an OB/GYN and board-certified addiction medicine specialist who is Medical Director of Hazelden Betty Ford’s three facilities in Southern California, building on her 24-year career in the U.S. Military. If you or someone you know are pregnant or thinking of becoming pregnant, don’t miss the important information Dr. DeRoo brings to this episode of Mom Enough. (Thank you to the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation for being a longtime a supporting partner to Mom Enough.)
WHAT MYTHS HAVE YOU HELD ON PREGNANCY AND SUBSTANCE USE? What information did you find surprising in this discussion of pregnancy and substance use? To what extent do you think expectant or prospective parents are receiving the information they need in order to protect the prenatal development of their babies? What could be done to reach a broader audience with this essential information?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT PREGNANCY AND SUBSTANCE USE? ❉ OPIOID ADDICTION: KEYS TO PREVENTION AND INTERVENTION FROM THE HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. What can parents do to protect the children and adults in our family and community from the dangers of opioids? Ahmed Eid, Addiction Program Manager at the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, brings answers that every parent should hear. He addresses safer options for managing pain, how to dispose of leftover opioids, signs of opioid addiction, and effective treatment options.
❉ PARENTAL ADDICTION: IMPACT ON THE PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIP & HOW TO HEAL TOGETHER. Parental addiction has significant effects on children and the parent-child relationship, but there is hope and healing is possible. Helene Photias, national director of operations for the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation’s Children’s Program, and Paula Frisk, senior director of zero to five home visiting programs at St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development, join Marti & Erin to discuss keys to helping parents and children move toward healing, build more positive and secure relationships, and create the fun and joy that every child and parent deserves.
❉ HOPE FOR FAMILIES FACING ADDICTION: EXPERT ADVICE FROM HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. Kate Roselle, licensed clinical counselor and national outreach manager for Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation’s adolescent and young adult continuum of care, joins Mom Enough for a compelling discussion on families facing addiction. She shares tips for effecting change if a loved one is struggling, discusses clinical resources for families, and explores the factors that are associated with the greatest hope of successful treatment and recovery. Roselle says, “The opposite of addiction is connection,” and that informs the work of Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.
❉ WOMEN, ADDICTION AND MENTAL HEALTH: INFORMATION AND PRACTICAL GUIDANCE FROM HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. Dr. Sarah Wicks joins Marti & Erin to discuss unique challenges faced by women dealing with addiction and, more broadly, how to approach a loved one (male or female) you believe has a substance use problem.
As more states in the US legalize marijuana, it’s not surprising that social values about cannabis are changing. Not only have moral views on marijuana changed, cannabis products have changed as well. Marijuana is now much stronger and available in many forms – some of which could easily be confused for candy. What are your thoughts on marijuana legalization? Do you support it? Or oppose it? What are the potential risks of marijuana legalization?
Whatever your thoughts on legalization, it would be wise to tune into this week's Mom Enough episode with Dr. Victor Vines from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation. Vines discusses the difference between legalization and decriminalization, the effects of legalization on overdose deaths related to opioids, and the outcomes for states that have legalized marijuana. He also highlights the long-term effects of marijuana on teens. This is another great episode from Mom Enough supporting partner, Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation!
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MARIJUANA LEGALIZATION? What outcomes of legalization were you most surprised by? What will you do to inform your children about the potential negative side effects of using marijuana and cannabis products?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT MARIJUANA AND OTHER SUBSTANCES? ❉ VAPING, MARIJUANA AND CAPITALISM: WHAT PARENTS NEED TO KNOW. The cultural landscape around both tobacco and marijuana use has changed significantly in recent years. In this Mom Enough episode, Dr. Joseph Lee of the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation discusses what we need to know about how producers of these products are marketing to our children.
❉ PROMOTING WELLNESS, PREVENTING SUBSTANCE MISUSE: WISDOM FROM FCD PREVENTION WORKS. Are your kids pleading to go to parties because “everyone else goes”? And how accurate are your kids’ perceptions that “everyone else” is doing this? Are you looking to support your child in making healthy choices around alcohol, tobacco, and other drugs? Did you know that students who are concerned about popularity are more likely to use substances? The good news is there are evidence-based approaches for preventing substance misuse. Deirdre Flynn from FCD Prevention Works™, part of the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, shares critical information to help you support your children in making healthy choices
Kate Washington was a successful essayist, food writer, and mom to two daughters, ages 5 and 9, when her young husband was stricken with a debilitating illness. After a grueling 4-month hospital stay, her husband was sent home with vision loss, inability to walk, IV nutrition and 35 different medications. With no medical training, Kate suddenly became the provider of a kind of care she never imagined. She found her own energy depleted and her previous identity erased as she navigated motherhood and caregiving for this man with such an uncertain future.
Where was Kate to find the support she needed to sustain her through these overwhelming demands? What could friends and relatives say and do to be helpful during these long months and years of difficulty? How did government policies work for or against Kate and her family? How many women find themselves in similar circumstances to Kate’s? And what changes in policy and practice could ease the strain on those caregivers, especially those sandwiched between motherhood and caring for elders, spouses or other loved ones? Don’t miss this important Mom Enough episode about this crisis of unpaid, often unsupported, caregiving among women across the country.
HAVE YOU BEEN IN AN OVERWHELMING CAREGIVING SITUATION? Have you been in an overwhelming caregiving situation, or do you know someone who has? What resources (formal or informal) help in such a situation? What practical steps do you think communities, states and our nation could take to alleviate the burden of caregiving, especially for women?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT CAREGIVING AND BURNOUT? ❉ PARENTAL BURNOUT: HOW PRESSURE TO MEASURE UP IS EXHAUSTING MILLENNIALS (AND EVERYONE ELSE!) Let’s face it, parenting in today’s world can be taxing. With impossible societal standards and unattainable social media ideals for what parents should be, it’s no wonder people are feeling burnt out. Author Anne Helen Petersen began to notice that she and her peers were struggling to accomplish simple tasks. As she reviewed articles about what she was noticing, she came to recognize this experience as burnout. Petersen joins Mom Enough to discuss parental burnout among millennials (and all parents). .
Do you have a high schooler who is planning for college? Are you wondering how and what you might pay for college? As you begin your search, you might be surprised by the price of college today. Why is college so expensive? What factors have contributed to increasing college tuition? And what do we need to watch for as we navigate the plethora of college options, the numerous price-related factors in choosing a college, and the emotions that arise throughout the process?
Ron Lieber, the “Your Money” columnist for The New York Times, joins Marti and Erin to discuss his latest book, The Price You Pay for College: An Entirely New road Map for the Biggest Financial Decision Your Family Will Ever Make. He shares insights on the many options for post-secondary education and demystifies the often-confusing world of college finances. Learn what to look for in a college, gain clarity on merit aid, and walk away with a better understanding of the benefits of a gap year. If you have children who are planning to go to college, even if that is years away, you won’t want to miss this episode!
HOW CAN WE SUPPORT OUR CHILDREN IN THE CONTEXT OF THE RISING PRICE OF COLLEGE? What might you say to your eighth grader to help them prepare for college and the expenses associated with secondary education? What were you most surprised about when it comes to the rising cost of college? How will you be mindful of your emotions, especially the fear, guilt, and “snobbery” that Ron Lieber discusses, as you and your teen consider the right college choice?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT CHOOSING AND PAYING FOR COLLEGE? ❉ FINDING THE RIGHT COLLEGE: TIPS FOR SUCCESS AND SATISFACTION IN HIGHER ED. Finding the right college can feel overwhelming. Tune in as Mary Hill, Director of College Counseling and Academic Planning at St. Paul Academy and Summit School, addresses many common questions about finding the right college in this informative and important discussion.
❉ HOW COLLEGE MAKES OR BREAKS US: A CONVERSATION WITH AUTHOR PAUL TOUGH ON HOW YOUNG AMERICANS NAVIGATE THE COMPLEX PROCESSES OF APPLYING FOR AND ATTENDING COLLEGE AND MOVING ON TO SUCCESSFUL ADULT LIVES. Best-selling author Paul Tough spent six years exploring colleges in 21 states. He interviewed faculty, SAT tutors and students from all walks of life, concluding that higher education as an engine of social mobility is breaking down. He joins Marti & Erin to discuss what he learned and to offer action steps for college admissions, alumni, and public officials who make decisions on higher education funding.
Throughout your journey as a parent, you have no doubt received advice or sought out information to help you on your way. As you consider everything you have learned, what stands out as the most impactful parenting wisdom you've come across? Was there a specific moment when an epiphany struck and you realized a new way to do something? Or perhaps you discovered that you were right on track and breathed a sigh of relief?
Through 15 years of interviews with authors, researchers, and experts in fields related to parenting, and through countless interactions with other moms, Marti and Erin have had their fair share of these moments. On this 15th anniversary of Mom Enough, they reflect on these moments and the trends, challenges, and opportunities in mothers' lives in 2021. Tune in to this special episode as Marti and Erin explore what it really means to be mom enough. Learn about the downsides of overparenting, advances in brain research that highlight the benefits of positive parent-child interactions, new insights on teaching consent and boundaries at every age, and the importance of raising our children to be "upstanders" who confront racism, injustice and inequity in our society. You won't want to miss this important episode!
WHAT HAS BEEN THE MOST IMPACTFUL PARENTING WISDOM YOU HAVE DISCOVERED? How will you avoid the pitfalls of overparenting? What will you do to teach your child the importance of consent? What steps can you take today to raise empathetic children who are "upstanders" in your community?
MOM ENOUGH SHOWS YOU WON'T WANT TO MISS! ❉ HOW TO RAISE AN ADULT: A CONVERSATION WITH NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING AUTHOR, JULIE LYTHCOTT-HAIMS. While our job as parents is to love, care for, and teach our children, the purpose of our role is to raise a contributing member of society as our children reach adulthood. Lythcott-Haims shares insights from her book, How to Raise an Adult, in this compelling episode of Mom Enough.
❉ YOUR TURN: WISDOM ON ADULTING FROM NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING AUTHOR, JULIE LYTHCOTT-HAIMS. Tune in to this Mom Enough episode as Lythcott-Haims' shares wisdom your young adult child will need to begin their journey into adulthood.
❉ YOUR CHILDREN’S EXPERIENCE OF POSITIVE STRESS AND TOXIC STRESS: A CONVERSATION WITH U OF M PROFESSOR MEGAN GUNNAR. As much as we’d love to make life easy for our children, they inevitably will experience stress. So, when does stress become toxic stress and undermine our children’s longterm health and well-being? You won’t want to miss this important discussion with Dr. Megan Gunnar.
❉ THE CHEMISTRY OF CALM AND JOY: A CONVERSATION WITH INTEGRATIVE PSYCHIATRIST HENRY EMMONS. Would you like to find more calm and joy in your life? Dr. Henry Emmons shares simple strategies to quiet our minds, build resilience, and maximize our experience of calm, joy and well-being.
❉ “THE TALK”: HOW PARENTS PROTECT THEIR BLACK CHILDREN FROM RACISM. Andre Dukes, Senior Director of Collective Impact – Early Childhood at the Northside Achievement Zone, shares personal reflections, gives tips for protecting Black children’s innocence while making them aware of the dangers they face due to racism, and calls on all parents, regardless of race, to teach their children empathy and the importance of standing up when they see injustice.
❉ TEACHING CHILDREN ABOUT CONSENT: RIGHTS, RESPECT AND NO REGRETS. Christy Keating, prosecutor turned parenting coach, and CEO of The Heartful Parent, joins Marti & Erin in this Mom Enough episode on consent. Tune in for a rich, heartfelt, and informative discussion on this important aspect of parenting.
Are you feeling tired or burned out? Do you sometimes wonder if a life without fatigue is still possible? Burnout and fatigue seem to be endemic in our culture, especially among women. And, as moms, we are often tasked with caring for everyone else, sometimes to the detriment of our own self-care.
So, why are we so tired? I'm So Effing Tired author, Dr. Amy Shah, highlights key factors that contribute to fatigue: chronobiology (24-hour light and dark cycle), microbiology (gut health), and psychobiology (mindset management). She explores the many foods that can help us optimize our health and gives tips for timing our eating during the day. Finally, and perhaps most surprisingly, she tells us why (and when) we might want to forgo high-intensity exercise for something a bit more low key. Check out this Mom Enough episode for more practical tips on beating burnout and boosting your energy!
WHAT CONTRIBUTES TO YOUR FATIGUE? What dietary changes will you consider making after hearing this episode? Are there fiber-rich vegetables you plan to add to your meals? How might you vary your exercise routine based on your current energy, sleep quality and stress level?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT PREVENTING BURNOUT AND FATIGUE? ❉ PARENTAL BURNOUT: HOW PRESSURE TO MEASURE UP IS EXHAUSTING MILLENNIALS (AND EVERYONE ELSE!). Anne Helen Petersen, author of I Can’t Even: How Millennials Became the Burnout Generation, explores societal standards of parenting, parental guilt, how the parenting millennials experienced influences how they parent their own children, and how we might alleviate burnout.
❉ YOUR CHILDREN NEED A HEALTHY MOM, BUT ARE YOU LOOKING OUT FOR YOUR HEALTH THE WAY YOU SHOULD? Dr. Andrea Messina shares tips on how to make sure your health needs — from incontinence to fatigue to breast health — are fully addressed.
Are your kids pleading to go to parties because "everyone else goes"? And how accurate are your kids' perceptions that "everyone else" is doing this? Are you looking to support your child in making healthy choices around alcohol, tobacco, and other drugs? Did you know that students who are concerned about popularity are more likely to use substances? The good news is there are evidence-based approaches for preventing substance misuse.
Deirdre Flynn from FCD Prevention Works™, part of the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, joins Marti & Erin this week to share critical information to help you support your children in making healthy choices. She discusses how substance abuse prevention has changed as the focus has shifted away from the drugs and toward the children. Arming parents with tools to support their children, she shares insights on how to respond to your children's pleas, the best way to address a family history of addiction, and what you need to know about student substance use during the pandemic. Tune in to this informative Mom Enough episode and walk away prepared to help your child make healthy choices.
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT PREVENTING SUBSTANCE MISUSE? What will you say next time your child or teen says, "everyone else is doing it"? How will you support your child as we come out of the pandemic? If you have a family history of addiction, how will you address this with your children?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SCHOOL-BASED SUBSTANCE ABUSE PREVENTION? ❉ FCD PREVENTION WORKS™. FCD is the leading international nonprofit provider of school-based substance abuse prevention services. FCD provides students and adults who care for them with information and skills to make healthy choices about substances.
❉ HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. Hazelden offers recovery services, and also has options for virtual addiction and mental health care and recovery support resources.
❉ PREPARING YOUR CHILD FOR HEALTHY CHOICES ABOUT SUBSTANCE USE: A CONVERSATION WITH DR. JOSEPH LEE FROM HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. Dr. Joseph Lee of the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation Youth Continuum, joins Marti & Erin to bring strong words of hope about the power of the messages you give your children about drugs and alcohol. And even if your child is still just a tot, it’s never too soon to think about the messages about substance use that you are
❉ HELPING CHILDREN DEAL WITH A FAMILY MEMBER’S SUBSTANCE USE: A MESSAGE OF RESILIENCE FROM HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. When a parent or family member is dealing with substance abuse, children are affected in many ways. Helene Photias shares insights to help children heal.
No doubt we all know someone with an Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). Based on data from 2016, the CDC reports that about 1 in 54 children in the U.S. is diagnosed with ASD, with boys being four times more likely than girls to be diagnosed. These children come from all kinds of backgrounds and vary greatly in terms of language, cognitive ability and other personal characteristics. But all deserve appropriate intervention, as early as possible, along with acceptance and inclusion in a community of kind, supportive, understanding adults and peers.
This week’s Mom Enough guest, Dr. Tom Frazier, joins Marti & Erin to help us learn what we need to know about ASD. A clinical psychologist, renowned researcher and Chief Science Officer of Autism Speaks, Tom discusses causes, effective interventions and promising implications of genetic research on ASD. But Tom also is the father of a teenage son with ASD and understands firsthand the importance of support for parents and other family members of children and adults with autism. Don’t miss this important, heartfelt conversation about this developmental disorder that touches so many lives.
HOW CAN WE SUPPORT CHILDREN WITH ASD? What experience have you had with children or adults who have Autism Spectrum Disorder? What new things did you learn from Dr. Frazier about possible causes? Specific things that are usually part of early intervention? And concrete ways you could support parents of a child with ASD?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT ASD? ❉ AUTISM SPEAKS. Autism Speaks is committed to supporting individuals with autism and their families.
❉ AUTISM RESPONSE TEAM. The Autism Response Team (ART) is an information line for the autism community. Call or email for support:
1-888-AUTISM2 (1-888-288-4762) En Español: 1-888-772-9050 help@autismspeaks.org
❉ FINDING THE RIGHT “SENSORY DIET” FOR YOU AND YOUR CHILD: STRATEGIES FOR REGULATING EMOTION AND SUSTAINING OPTIMAL ENERGY. Kate Biederman, an occupational therapist from St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development, joins Marti & Erin to shine light on how we can be more aware and intentional in helping our children find the “sensory diet” that will allow them to be their best at home, school or on a trip to the mall.
Do you have a young adult child who is struggling with adulting? Are they finding it difficult to take on the many important tasks and responsibilities of adulthood? It's no surprise as college gets more expensive (and loan debt increases), as wage growth is slow, and as healthcare and housing costs climb. So, what can be done to support our young adult children as they make the transition into adulthood?
New York Times bestselling author, Julie Lythcott-Haims, returns to Mom Enough with a new book on supporting our children in becoming adults. She shares wisdom, personal reflections, and the stories of other young adults in her ultimate guide for adulting, Your Turn: How to Be an Adult. With vulnerability and compassion, Lythcott-Haims offers insights and helpful tips to guide young adults to discover their unique selves and define their singular path to adulthood. Speaking of the transition to adulthood, 16-year-old Clara Garner joins her mom, Dr. Erin Erickson, as this episode's co-host. Clara was eager to hear what Julie Lythcott-Haims had to say about how young adults can combat perfectionism, stop pleasing others, and identify their "why" as they make the world a better place. You won't want to miss this important episode of Mom Enough!
WHAT STEPS CAN YOUR YOUNG ADULT TAKE TO BEGIN ADULTING? How can we support young adults in moving past perfectionism? Why is it important that young adults stop aiming to please others? Contribution is an important part of being a healthy adult. How can we, and the young adults in our lives, find our "why" as we make the world better?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT BECOMING AN ADULT AND JULIE LYTHCOTT HAIMS? ❉ HOW TO RAISE AN ADULT: A CONVERSATION WITH NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING AUTHOR, JULIE LYTHCOTT-HAIMS. While our job as parents is to love, care for, and teach our children, the purpose of our role is to raise a contributing member of society as our children reach adulthood. Lythcott-Haims shares wisdom and insights from her book, How to Raise an Adult, in this compelling episode of Mom Enough.
❉ JULIE LYTHCOTT-HAIMS. Learn more about New York Times bestselling author, Julie Lythcott-Haims on her website.
❉ EXCERPT OF HOW TO BE AN ADULT. Begin reading Julie Lythcott-Haims latest book now!
When your preschooler refuses to get ready for bed, how do you respond? What do you do when your 8-year-old is afraid to go to school because of being teased on the playground? Maybe you’re dealing with stress of your own and want to throw your hands up and shout, “You’d better get ready by the time I count to 3, or else!” But, as you probably have learned, matching your child’s emotional level only escalates the situation. Fortunately, there’s a clear alternative available to you in the Conscious Discipline program developed by Dr. Becky Bailey.
Used by parents and educators around the country, conscious discipline emphasizes the importance of first making a connection with your child and consciously bringing your own emotional level down so your child can do the same. This week on Mom Enough, Education Coordinator Sara Reichstadt and early childhood educator Katie Xiong from Kinderberry Hill Child Development Centers join Marti & Erin to talk about their experience using Conscious Discipline. Tune in to learn how this evidence-based approach promotes optimal social-emotional health and wellbeing, both for children and the adults who care for them.
WHAT MIGHT YOU DO TO GET STARTED WITH CONSCIOUS DISCIPLINE? Think of a recent situation in which your child was emotionally upset or engaged in behavior that triggered you to feel emotionally unregulated. How did you respond? In what ways could you have established a connection with your child in that difficult moment? What could you have said and done to bring the emotional level down for yourself and your child?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT CONSCIOUS DISCIPLINE & KINDERBERRY HILL? ❉ KINDERBERRY HILL. All of Kinderberry Hill’s childcare and education centers are still open and following guidelines to keep children and their families safe during the pandemic. Kinderberry Hill also has great resources on their website…check out their suggestion to paint with water!
❉ CONSCIOUS DISCIPLINE. Learn more about Conscious Discipline -- a powerful approach to create connection, safety, and a problem-resolution focus at home.
❉ POSITIVE DISCIPLINE: A CONVERSATION WITH AUTHOR DR. JANE NELSEN. Dr. Jane Nelsen, author of the well-known Positive Discipline book series (and a mother, grandmother and great-grandmother!) helps us move beyond a quick reaction to misbehavior, take a moment to consider the meaning of our child’s behavior and remember to help our child maintain a sense of connection and belonging.
Long before children enter formal education, they are constantly learning from parents and other caring adults who interact with them through language stimulation. Before they even begin to speak, babies are making sense of language, building a vocabulary and developing conversational patterns. They are laying the foundation on which all later learning will build. So, to make sure our children have this important foundation, do we need to be fluent in English, have a house full of books or know formal teaching strategies?
Dr. Alisha Wackerle-Hollman, from the School Psychology Program at the University of Minnesota, brings reassuring answers to these questions and more. As research shows, we need to speak to our babies about ordinary things in the language with which we are most comfortable. Growing up bilingual is an asset, not a liability. We need to follow our children’s interests, describing how things feel or taste, what they are doing (e.g. splashing in the tub) and what we are doing (e.g. wrapping baby in a warm, soft towel). When babies begin vocalizing, we need to take conversational turns, pausing to let baby “speak” then taking our turn. (Alisha says “strive for 5” conversational turns.) We also need to embed our culture in conversations with our children, offering traditional foods, singing songs, saying prayers and participating in celebrations. Not only will these things help our children’s language stimulation, but they will help us build close, loving, joyful relationships!
HOW WILL YOU HELP BUILD YOUR CHILD'S LANGUAGE SKILLS? Do you have babies or young children in your family? Think of some of the special, fun, important things you can teach them by talking, singing and playing during everyday activities. How can you work language stimulation into what you say and do while dressing your baby? Cooking dinner? Getting ready for bed?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT LANGUAGE DEVELOPMENT? ❉ PROMOTING LANGUAGE DEVELOPMENT IN CHILDREN. Dr. Maria Sera, who has spent her adult life studying language development in children at the University of Minnesota’s Institute of Child Development, brings research-based information to help you provide the solid language foundation your child needs.
❉ LEARNING LANGUAGE, LEARNING THROUGH LANGUAGE. Melissa Koenig joins Mom Enough in this discussion on supporting children’s language development in both their primary language and second and third languages.featuring Melissa Koenig
❉ EARLY LANGUAGE DEVELOPMENT. Check out this tip sheet from Mom Enough supporting partner, St. David's Center for Child & Family Development.
The concept of consent has been in the news a lot in recent years in the context of stories of sexual assault at high school or college parties and sexual harassment in the workplace. But, understanding consent is important long before children reach adolescence. In what ways might we be unintentionally sending the wrong message about consent? What about when we push our young child to give a hug to a visiting relative? Or what about kids horsing around by a lake and pushing another child off the dock?
These common scenes are the starting point for teaching children they have a right to say no. And, perfect opportunities for them to learn to respect the rights of others to say no to them. (And if Aunt Agnes wants a hug, she should ask, “Would it be OK if I gave you a hug?”) Then, when toddlers become teens, it’s time to ramp things up. At this age, you can speak candidly and clearly about legal definitions of consent. For example, you would be wise to discuss the risks of sexting. And – on the brighter side – you can discuss the joy of consent and enthusiastic (and sober) participation in intimacy. Christy Keating, prosecutor turned parenting coach, and CEO of The Heartful Parent, joins Marti & Erin in this Mom Enough episode. Tune in for a rich, heartfelt, and informative discussion on this important aspect of parenting.
HOW WILL YOU TEACH YOUR CHILDREN ABOUT CONSENT? Whatever the ages of your children, in what situations could you teach them in age-appropriate ways about the concept of consent? If you have adolescents (or, if not, think ahead to when you will), what are key points in this podcast that you would want to be sure to discuss with them? What are some of the situations or sources of pressure that could pose a threat to your teens or young adults in making healthy, respectful choices about consent in romantic relationships?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT CONSENT? ❉ HEARTFUL PARENT HANDOUT ON CONSENT. Take a look at this handout on talking about consent that includes do's, don'ts, and Christy Keating's eight rules for what to talk about.
❉ TEACHING OUR CHILDREN ABOUT SEX, LOVE AND EQUALITY: A CONVERSATION ABOUT SEX EDUCATION. Author Bonnie Rough discovered some surprising lessons about sex education while living in the Netherlands when her children were very young. That experience led her to several years of research for her latest book, Beyond Birds and Bees: Bringing Home a New Message to Our Kids about Sex, Love and Equality. Bonnie joins Marti & Erin for a thought-provoking discussion on what she learned about the "birds and the bees."
Are you pregnant and wondering if you need to scale back your exercise routine? Or are you coming into pregnancy with a little extra weight and wanting to know how to have the healthiest pregnancy? Gone are the days of taking it easy and “eating for two.” We now know that exercise is an important part of a healthy pregnancy, and that you do not need to eat twice as much food to feed your developing baby.
Tune in this week as obstetrician and gynecologist, Dr. Diana Ramos, shares insights from Your Pregnancy and Childbirth: Month to Month from the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. Dr. Ramos discusses the many benefits of exercise during pregnancy (including building endurance for labor), what exercises are safe during and after pregnancy, and what precautions to be aware of when you are exercising during pregnancy. And, for women who are concerned about their weight, she shares some helpful insights that might be wise to consider long before a pregnancy. Join us for this evidence-based, fact-filled episode of Mom Enough!
ARE YOU PREGNANT AND WANTING TO BE MORE ACTIVE? What was your biggest takeaway from this episode? What physical activity might you consider adding to your daily routine? When would you know that you are over-doing it?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT PRENATAL HEALTH & WELLBEING? ❉ AMERICAN COLLEGE OF OBSTETRICIANS AND GYNECOLOGISTS. Evidence-based information on women's health, including pregnancy.
❉ WHAT ARE YOUR OPTIONS FOR PREGNANCY CARE AND BIRTH PLANNING? When you decide to have a baby you begin a journey with countless decisions along the way. These days options abound in terms of pregnancy care and birth planning, and being well-informed is key to making good decisions for you and your baby. Diane Feller, Director of Nurse Midwives at Park Nicollet Clinics, joins Marti and Erin to help you consider your options.
❉ EXERCISE AND MENTAL HEALTH: THE PSYCHOLOGY OF EXERCISE. Dr. Beth Lewis discusses ways to stick to an exercise program, how to help your children make exercise a regular part of their routine, and how much exercise we need in order to reap optimal benefits for our physical and mental health.
Do you worry about the harms of social media, especially on body image? Do you find that you compare yourself to others as you scroll through Instagram or Facebook? In a culture where beauty is so often the primary focus, it can be a challenge to avoid harmful self-comparisons and to appreciate our bodies (and all they allow us to do). It can also be a struggle to see that we are more than a body.
Dr. Lexie Kite joins Mom Enough to discuss "body image resilience," navigating social media without harmful self-comparisons, and becoming more media savvy as we curate a healthier "body image environment." A researcher on media studies and body image, Kite is the co-author (with her twin, Dr. Lindsay Kite) of More Than a Body: Your Body is an Instrument, Not an Ornament. Join us for this inspiring episode and walk away with tips for avoiding the pitfalls of passive consumerism and new ways to take your power back by redefining beauty.
HOW WILL YOU REDEFINE BEAUTY? This week’s Mom Enough guest highlighted the harms caused by social media. What feelings have you noticed when you consider your time on social media? How has passive consumerism affected you? What might you do to "curate" your social media feed to be self help instead of self harm?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT BODY IMAGE RESILIENCE? ❉ BEAUTY REDEFINED. Drs. Lindsay and Lexie Kite founded this organization to help others build "body image resilience." Catch one of their events or read their blog for more great tips for tackling the media that surrounds us.
❉ HELPING YOUR CHILD MAINTAIN A HEALTHY BODY AND POSITIVE BODY IMAGE. Dr. Katie Loth, from the Department of Family Medicine and Community Health at the University of Minnesota, shares practical tips that will help you be more reflective about the subtle ways you shape your child’s attitudes, behavior and self-acceptance.
When you look at the little boys or young men in your family and community, do you ever think about the opportunity they will face to build a better world for both men and women? Do you think about their potential to build a new kind of strong, healthy manhood that will allow them to respect themselves and others, treat women as equals and stand up against violence and injustice?
This week’s Mom Enough guests, Ted Bunch and Anna Marie Johnson Teague, are devoting their lives to this effort through their work with A Call to Men and an innovative new book for boys, The Book of Dares: 100 Ways for Boys to Be Kind, Bold and Brave. When Marti & Erin ask the guests why they focus specifically on boys, they describe the limitations that have been put on boys, and they note the fact that males die earlier and perpetrate most of the violence. As they say, “The liberation of men will be the liberation of women.” As parents, we need to start early in raising boys to a healthy manhood. So, whether you have a toddler or a teen, tune into this inspiring conversation and focus on the steps you can take to support your son in becoming the respectful, authentic, emotionally engaged man he can be.
WHAT DID YOU LEARN ABOUT RAISING BOYS WHO EMBRACE HEALTHY MANHOOD?
This week’s Mom Enough guests note that boys learn early on to be in the “Man Box.” What does that mean? And how can we invite the boys in our life, at any age, to step out of that box? Using the ideas of The Book of Dares, think of two or three dares you could pose to your son that would encourage him to think in new ways about how both boys and girls benefit when boys step out of the “Man Box.”
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT RAISING HEALTHY BOYS?
❉ A CALL TO MEN. This organization works to promote healthy, respectful manhood by offering trainings and educational resources to organizations, such as schools, businesses, and community organizations.
❉ HOW TO RAISE A BOY: A CONVERSATION ABOUT THE POWER OF CONNECTION TO BUILD GOOD MEN. Dr. Michael Reichert offers practical guidance whether you are the parent of a lively preschooler, a 5th-grader trying to succeed in school or a teenager trying to navigate the turbulent waters of romance and sexuality or grappling with disturbing pornographic images on the internet.
Sufficient high-quality sleep is key to health and well-being at every age. Yet many parents are chronically sleep-deprived, with women three times more likely than men to struggle with insomnia. Consequences of poor sleep include difficulty with mood regulation, memory, learning, weight gain and other health problems. Too often the strategies we use to try to relax and wind down before bed (a glass of wine, binge-watching a favorite TV show, chatting on social media) end up exacerbating sleep difficulties. But there are simple steps we can take right now to begin to establish patterns that will allow us to get the quality sleep we need and, in turn, ensure that our children do the same.
Dr. Shelby Harris, psychologist and author of The Women’s Guide to Overcoming Insomnia, brings a wealth of concrete, research-based strategies to her discussion with Marti & Erin in this Mom Enough episode. Beyond building good sleep patterns, Dr. Harris also emphasizes that, even if you have a clinical level of insomnia that requires professional help, medication is not necessarily the first line of treatment. Cognitive behavioral therapy has been shown to be highly effective and safe and should be tried first. Don’t miss this important and informative discussion about an issue that disrupts so many lives.
HOW ARE YOU AND YOUR FAMILY DOING WHEN IT COMES TO REST? What new things did you learn in this interview with Dr. Shelby Harris? What steps could you take to improve your family’s patterns around bedtime?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SLEEP? ❉ THE WOMEN'S GUIDE TO OVERCOMING INSOMNIA. Check out Dr. Harris's book for women.
❉ IN SEARCH OF A GOOD NIGHT’S SLEEP: PRACTICAL TIPS FROM DR. HARVEY KARP. Check out this Mom Enough episode with Dr. Harvey Karp, who offers proven tools and techniques for helping children of all ages (and their parents!) get the sleep they need.
Has your sex life been put on the back burner since you became a parent? Do you find yourself struggling to get in the mood or to have the same spontaneous arousal as your partner? Or, do you have the feeling that you are somehow sexually broken? You are not alone! Women’s sexual desire is not the same as men’s, and it’s time you stop comparing yourself to your male counterpart and learn what it takes to have fulfilling and pleasurable sex. So, how can you create the sex life you want?
Tune in to this episode of Mom Enough with Sex and Intimacy Coach, Irene Fehr. Out of her own experience in a “happy marriage turned sexless,” Irene focused her efforts to understand women’s pleasure and sexuality, uncovering the common myths that result in women blaming themselves for their sexless marriages. She outlines the truth about women’s sexual desire, highlights the roles partners can play in recovering women’s libido, and shares tips to help you get back to yourself and your sex life after becoming a mom. You won’t want to miss this intimate, and hopeful, conversation on sex and desire!
WHAT HAVE YOU NOTICED ABOUT YOUR SEX LIFE AFTER BECOMING A PARENT? What myth about women’s sexuality surprised you the most? How will this information change your approach to sex and intimacy in the future?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SEX AFTER PARENTHOOD? ❉ HOW TO WANT SEX AGAIN. Learn more about the four myths and the roadmap to sexual desire in this free 3-video minicourse.
❉ WHY DO COUPLES STOP HAVING SEX? Why do couples stop having sex in a long-term relationship — and why is that a good thing?
❉ CHILDREN BENEFIT WHEN THEIR PARENTS' RELATIONSHIP IS STRONG. Dr. Laurie Mintz, author of A Tired Woman’s Guide to Passionate Sex, joins Marti and Erin for a lively discussion of how the exhausting demands of parenting can cause us to lose focus on what we need to feel healthy and good about ourselves.
It’s a big step for anyone to admit to having a problem with substance use. And for people of color, LGBTQIA2S+ individuals, or people with a disability or mental health disorder, it’s common to fear that treatment programs will not understand or address their unique needs and challenges. Fortunately, individualized addiction treatment is available.
Dr. Princess Drake, a mental health practitioner at Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation (HBFF) and Adjunct Assistant Professor within the Hazelden Graduate School of Addiction, joins Marti & Erin for an illuminating discussion of how she and her colleagues adapt their addiction treatment strategies to individual characteristics and experiences. Dr. Drake draws on examples, such as clients facing intense stigma around mental health issues within their culture, a person with a learning disability that makes written work or speaking in a group difficult, a war veteran who balks at the word “surrender” (the first step in a 12-step program), or a person of color dealing with grief and anger over a lifetime of social injustice. With compassion and an eagerness to understand each individual’s lived experience, Dr. Drake and her HBFF colleagues welcome people from all backgrounds to join them on the journey of sobriety and health.
*Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans, Queer/Questioning, Intersex, Asexual, and Two-Spirit
WHY IS INDIVIDUALIZED ADDICTION TREATMENT SO IMPORTANT? Why do you think it’s important for chemical dependency treatment programs to address individual differences in beliefs, experiences, culture, abilities and disabilities? If you or a member of your family were to see Dr. Drake, how might you answer her question, “How does your (race, sexual identity, religion, disability, other difference) affect the way you live in the world?” And how might that relate to your use of alcohol or other mood-altering substances?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT ADDICTION TREATMENT AND RECOVERY? ❉ HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. Visit this site to learn more about the individualized addiction treatment options available to you or your loved one. ❉ SAMHSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration) Helpline. To call the National Helpline, call 1-800-662-HELP (4357) or click this link to learn more. ❉ OPIOID ADDICTION: KEYS TO PREVENTION AND INTERVENTION FROM THE HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. What can we do as parents to protect the children and adults in our family and community from the dangers of opioids? Ahmed Eid, Addiction Program Manager at the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, has answers that every parent should hear. ❉ TRAUMA AND ADDICTION, HOPE AND RECOVERY: A CONVERSATION WITH AUTHOR JENNIFER STORM. ˆBlackout Girl author, Jennifer Storm, discusses her tumultuous journey from trauma and addiction to recovery and hope. She shares the keys to letting go of secrets and shame on the path to healing and recovery. She has published her story in
Bryan Piatt was a talented and popular TV journalist and news anchor with a calm and competent on-screen presence. But, inside, he still struggled with the intense anxiety that had plagued him since childhood. When anxiety began to compromise his job performance, Bryan took the brave step of going public with his story so that others could benefit from what he had experienced and learned. And he sought support from bosses, colleagues and a therapist to help him continue to use his professional talents in ways that would help him reduce and cope with his anxiety.
Bryan joins Mom Enough hosts Marti & Erin for a candid conversation about how anxiety affected his life from childhood to adulthood, the ways many adults missed the meaning of the signs Bryan was presenting, and what finally happened to put him on the path to strength and healing. We invite you to listen to this heartfelt story, build your awareness of how anxiety often shows up in children and teens, and consider how you can help reduce the stigma of mental health problems at any age.
HAVE YOU OR SOMEONE CLOSE TO YOU EXPERIENCED CHRONIC ANXIETY OR PANIC ATTACKS?
What were the symptoms, and what did you do about them? Why do you think there is such a stigma about anxiety, depression and other mental health problems, and what can you do to help reduce that stigma and help ensure that people get the help they need?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH? ❉ SAMHSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration) Helpline. To call the National Helpline, call 1-800-662-HELP (4357) or click this link to learn more. ❉ NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness). Learn about mental illness, get support, and find out how you can advocate for change. NAMI has local organizations; find yours on this website. ❉ ANXIETY IN CHILDREN: POSSIBLE CAUSES, HELPFUL STRATEGIES AND EFFECTIVE TREATMENTS. HealthPartners psychiatrist Dr. Elizabeth Reeve brings her knowledge and experience to this lively discussion with Marti & Erin, who share a few stories of how anxiety shows up on their own family tree!
❉ SCHOOL ANXIETY: UNDERSTANDING CAUSES AND FINDING EFFECTIVE STRATEGIES. Clinical psychologist Dr. Jordan Hart shares practical, effective, evidence-based advice for how parents can help children overcome school anxiety and build skills that will help them meet challenges throughout their lives.
❉CONNECT WITH BRYAN ON INSTAGRAM & FACEBOOK. Stay up-to-date on Bryan's important advocacy work.
“It’s so ironic how Black children are so easily stereotyped as threatening when they are so often bullied by systems that are supposed to help them,” says Andre Dukes, Senior Director of Collective Impact – Early Childhood at the Northside Achievement Zone. In this week’s important Mom Enough episode, he discusses the necessity of "the talk," which he describes as Black parents, or parents of Black children, “preparing their children to enter into this world where they are unfairly judged and stereotyped.”
“The Talk” is not a new concept; it has roots in times of slavery when parents had to teach their children how to survive in a dangerously racist world. As Dukes says, the goal of “The Talk” is “to keep children alive in a world where whiteness is the standard by which all people are measured.” He shares personal reflections, gives tips for protecting Black children's innocence while making them aware of the dangers they face due to racism, and calls on all parents, regardless of race, to teach their children empathy and the importance of standing up when they see injustice. Tune in to hear the wisdom and critical insights of a leading parenting expert in Minneapolis, Andre Dukes.
WHAT DID YOU LEARN ABOUT “THE TALK” AND RAISING EMPATHIC CHILDREN IN THIS EPISODE?
How are you raising your children to be aware of systemic racism and injustice? What will you do differently to ensure your children are empathetic and prepared to be an ally who speaks up when they see injustice? How will you raise your awareness of your own bias?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT RACISM OR RAISING EMPATHETIC CHILDREN?
❉ MOTHERHOOD SO WHITE: A DISCUSSION ON RACE, ADOPTION, AND PARENTING IN TODAY’S WORLD. What can a mother do when she doesn’t see herself in the pages of parenting books? Or when the resources don’t address her greatest concerns? As a single Black woman who chose to become a mother through adoption, author Nefertiti Austin took to writing her own experiences in her critically acclaimed memoir, Motherhood So White: A Memoir of Race, Gender and Parenting in America. Tune into this poignant episode of Mom Enough.
❉ NURTURING YOUR CHILD’S EMPATHY, INFANCY TO ADULTHOOD. In this episode of Mom Enough, Dr. Megan Gunnar, professor in the University of Minnesota’s Institute of Child Development, joins Marti & Erin to discuss early signs of empathy in infancy, the growing capacity for compassionate empathy in the toddler period, and simple, practical ways parents can encourage and expand children’s empathy in everyday interactions at every stage.
Young children are naturally impulsive, from the 11-month-old eagerly crawling to explore the electrical outlet on the wall to the 3-year-old dashing into the street to retrieve her ball, to the preschool punching a classmate who gets in his space. With maturation and parental guidance, young children can build reflective skills and executive function, learning to pause, think, calm their emotions and problem-solve.
Mike Huber has been an early childhood educator since 1992 and is a member of the leadership team at St. David’s Center for Child and Family Development, a supporting partner of Mom Enough. Mike brings a fresh perspective to impulsivity, seeing both its positive aspects (initiative, goal-directed behavior) and challenges, and he offers fun, effective ways to help children learn to recognize and override misguided impulses and come up with more appropriate alternatives. Don’t miss a lively discussion of this important topic in lifelong human development!
IN WHAT WAYS DO YOU SEE IMPULSIVITY IN YOUR CHILDREN? Think of times when you’ve seen your children be more reflective, stopping to think even when they have an impulse to do something inappropriate, hurtful or dangerous. What practical tips did you hear in this Mom Enough episode to help your children learn to pause, listen and think before they act? What positive aspects of impulsivity did you learn about?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT CHILD DEVELOPMENT AND OUR GUEST? ❉ Teaching With the Body in Mind. Check out this page for helpful information that celebrates children's need to move in big, challenging, rough, and joyful ways.
❉ Mike Huber's Children's Books. Check out our guest's facebook page to learn more about his children's books.
Are you keeping your children home from early childhood learning or education programs because of the pandemic? Are you concerned that they may not be developing the skills they need while at home? If so, tune in this week to learn what you can do to support your young children’s social and emotional learning and development while at home.
Many of us are working from home or keeping our children home to protect our families from the coronavirus. While children are at home, they likely do not have the same social interactions and learning experiences that they would have at their early childhood education program. Fortunately, Sheila Williams Ridge, Director of the Shirley G. Moore Laboratory School at the University of Minnesota, has tips to help our children stay on track developmentally.
On behalf of Help Me Grow MN, Ridge shares wise insights based on her many years of experience in early childhood. Tune in to learn what you can do to support your young children’s social and emotional learning and development, including opportunities for safe socialization with peers, online resources, and simple things you can do at home to keep your children's development on track. Rest assured that being home will not limit your children's learning and development. You and your family play an important role in this critical time in your children's development.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO SUPPORT YOUR YOUNG CHILDREN'S SOCIAL & EMOTIONAL LEARNING AT HOME? What are you doing to make the most of this time at home? How have you helped your children stay connected to and continue to learn from their peers? What new activity will you try this week to support your young children's development?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT EARLY CHILDHOOD LEARNING AND DEVELOPMENT? ❉ 1000 Hours Outside. Kids spend more than a 1000 hours per year on screens. Let's change that into time outdoors with helpful suggestions from 1000 Hour Outside.
❉ Very Well Family. Check out this helpful resources for tips from pregnancy to parenting.
❉ HighScope at Home. This is an excellent source for tips on helping your family continue early childhood education at home.
❉ The Three C's: Competence, Contribution, and Connection. Research and community wisdom converge to point the way to essential experiences that allow children and youth to grow up to be caring, responsible adults. Even in the face of high-risk conditions, these "three Cs" can serve as important protective factors that enable children to rise above risk. So where are the opportunities for children to experience these three Cs at each stage of their development? And what can each of us do in our own families, communities, and workplaces to ensure that all children have enough of the three Cs to see them through?
❉ The Ultimate List of Age-Appropriate Chores. Are you wondering what chores your children can do at different ages? Well, here is the list. Doing chores helps children build competence and a sense of contribution (two of the Three C's mentioned above).
Did you know that 1 in 10 people over the age of 12 years struggles with a substance use disorder? With such a high incidence, it is likely that most people have a friend or family member who is struggling with substance use or abuse. So, how does addiction affect families? And is there hope for families facing addiction?
Kate Roselle, licensed clinical counselor and national outreach manager for Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation’s adolescent and young adult continuum of care, joins Mom Enough for a compelling discussion on families facing addiction. She shares tips for effecting change if a loved one is struggling, discusses clinical resources for families, and explores the factors that are associated with the greatest hope of successful treatment and recovery. Roselle says, “The opposite of addiction is connection,” and that informs the work of Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation. Listen this week to learn about families and addiction, and to feel hope for a healthier future for families struggling.
DO YOU HAVE OR KNOW A FAMILY STRUGGLING WITH THE DISEASE OF ADDICTION? What were your biggest takeaways in this episode on families and addiction? What next step might you take to help your family or another family facing addiction?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT HELP FOR FAMILIES FACING ADDICTION? ❉ PARENTAL ADDICTION: IMPACT ON THE PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIP & HOW TO HEAL TOGETHER. Helene Photias, national director of operations for the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation’s Children’s Program, and Paula Frisk, senior director of zero to five home visiting programs at St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development, join Marti & Erin to discuss keys to helping parents and children move toward healing, build more positive and secure relationships, and create the fun and joy that every child and parent deserves.
❉ VIRTUAL ADDICTION TREATMENT AND RECOVERY SUPPORT THROUGH HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. Tune into this Mom Enough episode with Janelle Wesloh as she explores the many virtual options for people and families facing addiction.
❉ OPIOID ADDICTION: KEYS TO PREVENTION AND INTERVENTION FROM THE HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. Ahmed Eid, Addiction Program Manager at the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, brings answers that every parent should hear in this Mom Enough episode.
❉ SESAME STREET INTRODUCES NEW CHARACTER TO HELP KIDS UNDERSTAND THE OPIOID CRISIS. Sesame Street creators turned to the issue of addiction since data shows 5.7 million children under the age of 11 live in households with a parent with substance use disorder. Learn more in this video.
Even if you love to cook healthy and delicious meals, the pressures of work, family and picky eaters sometimes can turn your passion into a feeling of drudgery. Siri Daly knows all about that and has made a career out of rising above the drudgery! Siri is the mother of four, author of both the blog and cookbook, Siriously Delicious, and wife of TV star Carson Daly, with whom Siri appears regularly in cooking segments on NBC’s Today Show.
But Siri made time to bring her relaxed, healthy, joyful attitude about food to this week’s free-flowing conversation with Marti & Erin. Siri and Erin find common ground in their homemade marshmallows, while Marti feels like a close friend of Siri after just reading the personal stories in her cookbook (never mind trying a few of the yummy recipes). All three women were hungry for really good mac ‘n cheese by the end of their chat -- maybe with a side of what Siri wisely calls "crispies." You’ll want to join in on the fun of this special Mom Enough episode.
WHAT DELICIOUS MEALS ARE YOU HOPING TO MAKE THIS HOLIDAY? What clever ways do you entice your kids to eat items from healthy meals that they are reluctant to try? What shortcuts do you use when you’re too tired to cook from scratch but want to serve a healthful meal? And what fun holiday treats might you make with your kids this year?
WANT TO LEARN MORE? For Siri's blog, click here.
For the Siriously Delicious cookbook, click here.
For How to Keep Food Fun, click here.
For Ways to Change Foods, click here.
Let's face it, life as a mom (or dad) can be stressful. As we balance caregiving, household responsibilities, activity schedules, mealtimes, work, and, hopefully, some of our own needs, it easy to become exhausted or overwhelmed. Fortunately, the science of mindfulness is giving us new insights into how we can use mind-body skills to reduce stress and anxiety, relieve pain, increase energy and improve mood.
In the daily ups and downs of parenting, mind-body techniques can be simple, effective tools to enhance your own wellbeing while setting a healthy example for your children at the same time. You also can help your children build these same mind-body skills at any age, giving them a head start on living a rich, peaceful, joyful life.
Mom Enough co-host Dr. Erin Erickson teaches mind-body strategies and uses them in her clinical practice and in her demanding life as mom of three adolescents. In a twist on the usual Mom Enough format, Erin’s mom and co-host Dr. Marti Erickson interviews Erin on this important and practical topic.
HAVE YOU USED MIND-BODY SKILLS TO REDUCE STRESS?
What simple ideas did you hear in this Mom Enough interview that you could try right now? What resources are in your community to help you learn more about this? How will you use these skills with your children?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT MINDFULNESS AND MIND-BODY SKILLS?
❉ THE SCIENCE OF MINDFULNESS. Check out this tip sheet to learn more about the science of mindfulness. or the Science of Mindfulness sheet, click here.
❉ CLINICAL HYPNOSIS FOR CHILDREN WITH EMOTIONAL AND BEHAVIORAL CHALLENGES: A CONVERSATION WITH U OF M PHYSICIAN ANDY BARNES. Clinical hypnosis for children can sound strange or even scary to many of us. But University of Minnesota pediatrician Andy Barnes finds hypnosis for children to be an effective, child-friendly way to help his young patients (tots to teens) use play and imagination to strengthen self-regulation skills.
❉ HEADSPACE. What is meditation? What if I'm having trouble meditating? Check out this link to learn how to meditate.
❉ INSIGHT TIMER. Check out this great tool for thousands of free meditations. Find your meditation style!
❉ HeartMath. Want to learn more about the heart-brain connection?
Did you know that many foods we consider healthy are actually filled with sugar? Have you noticed your child's behavior change when they eat too much sugar? Americans are eating more and more sugar and they often don't even realize it. From organic fresh squeezed juices to low-fat yogurt, our foods are filled with sugar. And, these sugars have hidden dangers.
Dr. Michael Goran, one of the world's most widely recognized experts in childhood nutrition and obesity research, and Dr. Emily Ventura, an experienced nutrition educator, public health advocate, writer, and cook, discuss their new book, Sugarproof: The Hidden Dangers of Sugar That Are Putting Your Child's Health at Risk and What You Can Do. They join Marti & Erin for an in-depth discussion on hidden sources of sugar, how sugar consumption has changed over time, how we can reduce sugar, and how different types of sugar affect our children physically, emotionally, and academically. You won't want to miss this compelling episode of Mom Enough!
WHAT STEPS WILL YOU TAKE TO ADDRESS THE HIDDEN DANGERS OF SUGAR? How much sugar are your children eating? What have you noticed about the effects of sugar on your children's behavior? What were you most surprised to learn in this episode of Mom Enough?
WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ SUGARPROOF KIDS BLOG. Check out the Sugarproof blog for recipes, resources, and sugarproof science.
❉ SUGARPROOF HOMEMADE PUMPKIN PIE RECIPE. Check out this recipe on the Sugarproof Kids blog.
❉ GORAN LAB. Check out the lab where they are studying the effects of body fat, sugar, and diet on long-term health.
❉ FOLLOW SUGARPROOF AND MICHAEL GORAN ON SOCIAL MEDIA: Sugarproof on Instagram and Michael Goran on Twitter.
❉ PREVENTING OBESITY IN CHILDREN AND TEENS: A FAMILY AFFAIR. Dr. Daheia Barr-Anderson shares the small changes that can lead to big differences in the health of your children and you! Listen to this Mom Enough episode to learn more.
❉ THE BENEFITS OF FAMILY MEALS & FIVE TIPS TO MAKE THEM HAPPEN. In spite of what might feel like a futile effort, the time spent on meals is well worth it. Research has found that more frequent family meals are associated with many benefits for children. Read to learn more.
Before contemplating how to be a happier parent, we should think back to when we decided to become parents. We probably envisioned the fun of playing with our children, laughter and conversations around the dinner table and pride and joy in watching our children grow and learn. But, for many of us, we find those images replaced by days of rushed meals (or just a snack bar in the car), hectic drives from one sports event or music lesson to another and exhausted family members spending more time with their tech devices than with each other.
Writer KJ Dell’Antonia, former editor of the New York Times Motherlode blog, wanted to find out what had happened to happiness and what it would take for parents to find the joy they longed for. As she explains in her lively discussion with Marti & Erin on how to be a happier parent, KJ learned that joy comes with small changes – not by doing more, but by doing things differently. And she learned that when parents are happier, kids are too!
WHAT WILL IT TAKE FOR YOU TO BE A HAPPIER PARENT?
When are you happiest in your life as a parent? When are you least happy – and maybe sad, angry or resentful? What small changes could you make in your daily life to try to create more genuine happiness for you and your children?
WANT TO LEARN MORE?
❉ KJ Dell-Antonia's Blog: Check out Dell'Antonia's book reviews & recommendations
❉ When Parents Disagree about the Best Way to Raise Their Children tip sheet by Marti Erickson
❉ Encouragement: The Power Tool of Parenting tip sheet from St. David’s Center
❉ Loosening the Reins When Children Become Teens and Young Adults tip sheet by Marti Erickson
❉ Recognizing & Managing Parental Stress tip sheet from St. David’s Center
Let's face it, parenting in today's world can be taxing. With impossible societal standards and unattainable social media ideals for what parents should be, it's no wonder people are feeling burnt out. Author Anne Helen Petersen began to notice that she and her peers were struggling to accomplish simple tasks. As she reviewed articles about what she was noticing, she came to recognize this experience as burnout.
What came next was her viral article and her subsequent book, I Can’t Even: How Millennials Became the Burnout Generation. Petersen joins us to discuss parental burnout among millennials (and all parents). She explores societal standards of parenting, parental guilt, how the parenting millennials experienced influences how they parent their own children, and how we might alleviate burnout.
Tune into this relatable episode of Mom Enough and know that even if you aren’t a millennial, you will walk away with new insights on why you might be burned out too.
IN WHAT WAYS DO YOU FEEL PARENTAL BURNOUT? What could you do differently to feel less burnout? How do societal standards (or social media ideals) contribute to your burnout or shape your views of how you are parenting? How much are you prioritizing “me time” at this point in your parenting? What else do you need to feel less burned out?
WANT LEARN MORE ABOUT OUR GUEST AND GET TIPS ON COUNTERACTING BURNOUT WITH SOME "ME TIME"? ❉ CULTURE STUDY. Check out Anne Helen Petersen's newsletter to read more of her insights on culture.
❉ WHY “ME TIME” MATTERS. Check out this episode of Mom Enough to learn why "me time" is important and how you and your children benefit when you take care of yourself.
None of us could have imagined what 2020 would be like. Between the global pandemic, the killing of George Floyd and the uprisings in response to his wrongful death and persistent racism, it has been a year that has challenged parents and children alike. How can we help our children cope with the uncertainty of this time? What can we do to help our children process their emotions?
The answer to these questions came late at night for Haitian-American writer and licensed counselor, Jenny Delacruz. As she considered how to support her son through this difficult time, she was flooded with ideas and began writing. What came of her late-night creativity were the ideas for her recently released books and the desire to start a publishing company, so she could print the books her children needed. She is now the CEO of Cobbs Creek Publishing and the author of three books, Momma Can I Sleep with You Tonight, Fridays with Ms. Mélange: Haiti, and How Was Your Summer?
Delacruz joins Marti and Erin this week to discuss the stages of grief, concrete ways to support children and what to expect as our children navigate this difficult time. Join us to hear her inspiring story of creating the books her children needed and how she is giving back to her community.
HOW WILL YOU HELP YOUR CHILD COPE DURING THESE UNCERTAIN TIMES?
In what ways have you noticed your children move through the stages of grief during the pandemic? How might you validate your child's experiences and emotions? If you were going to write the story your children need right now, what would you write about?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT HELPING YOUR CHILDREN (AND YOURSELVES) COPE DURING THE PANDEMIC?
❉ STORY TIME WITH MS. MELANGE. Check out Jenny Delacruz's read-aloud YouTube channel that shares diverse children's picture books with anyone, anytime, and anywhere.
LET’S PLAY THROUGH THIS! TIPS ON COPING WITH THE PANDEMIC THROUGH PLAY. Get expert insight from Kinderberry Hill's Education Coordinator, Sara Reichstadt. She shares creative insights for adding play into your daily life!
❉ HELPING PARENTS COPE WITH THE PANDEMIC. In the face of an unprecedented global crisis that requires children to be home from school, whether they are in preschool or college, and results in a 24-hour news cycle with overwhelming and sometimes terrifying messages, it’s no wonder many parents are feeling stressed, overwhelmed, or sad. So, how can we cope as we adjust to new routines, financial challenges, and the risk of infection from the novel coronavirus? Dr. Erin Erickson, co-host of the weekly podcast Mom Enough®, offers tips to help you stay positive and actively address the range of emotions that most parents are feeling during this pandemic.
❉ HELPING FAMILIES COPE DURING THE PANDEMIC. We are all reading about it and listening to stories on the news. Our children are hearing about it too, and they are feeling the impact as they are kept at home and adjusting to new ways of learning. So, how can we stay happy and healthy as we hunker down and protect our families – and those most vulnerable – from COVID-19? Read these practical tips to help your family cope, and make the most of your time together, from family nurse practitioner and parenting coach, Dr. Erin Erickson.
❉ 10 NATURE ACTIVITIES TO HELP GET YOUR FAMILY THROUGH THE PANDEMIC. Our friend, author, Richard Louv wrote this excellent article on nature activities you and your children can do during the pandemic.
For all parents, our first lessons in parenting were those learned from our own parents, for better or worse (in most cases, some of both!). Beyond those early firsthand lessons, how we parent also is shaped by social forces and trends that may work for or against our children’s optimal development (consider, for example the recent trend of helicopter parenting or the old “do as I say, not as I do” axiom). Many parents also struggle to rise above cultural stereotypes, perhaps none more constraining than stereotypes of Black fathers.
Andre Dukes, Sr. Director of Collective Impact - Early Childhood at the Northside Achievement Zone in Minneapolis, has worked for 20 years supporting Black men to become the fathers they want to be and, more broadly, teaching reflective practices to professionals who work with children and families from all backgrounds. Don’t miss this heartfelt discussion as Andre joins Mom Enough co-hosts Marti & Erin Erickson to reflect on his own parenting journey, as well as what he has learned from the many parents he has served.
WHAT STANDS OUT MOST AS YOU REFLECT ON YOUR PARENTING? What is your vision of the kind of mom or dad you want to be? How is that the same as or different from your parents – or the cultural stereotypes with which you grew up? Andre Dukes emphasizes that “little moments count.” Think about a recent day in your life and identify the little moments that you got right with your children. What other moments could you have seized if you had been more mindful of the power of little moments in your relationship with your children?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT REFLECTIVE PARENTING? ❉ HOW TO PUT REFLECTIVE PARENTING IN ACTION. Listen as Dr. Erin Erickson from Mom Enough shares how to pause, relax, and reflect as a parent.
❉ SHAPING OUR NEURAL CONNECTIONS: A CONVERSATION WITH PSYCHIATRIST & AUTHOR DR. DAN SIEGEL. As UCLA psychiatrist Dan Siegel discusses with Marti & Erin, how our “mind” is more than our “brain,” and remembering and reflecting on our own childhood experiences can help us build new neural pathways and new ways of behaving at any age.
❉ REFLECTIVE PARENTING: HOW REFLECTING ON YOUR FEELINGS AND YOUR CHILD’S CAN TURN EVERYDAY CHALLENGES INTO BREAKTHROUGH MOMENTS. Psychiatrist Regina Pally discusses how reflective parenting can transform our relationships and the way we help our children learn to understand their own emotions and behavior.
A few years ago e-cigarettes were touted as a safer alternative to cigarettes. But it soon became apparent that was a questionable claim, particularly as child-friendly flavors and attractive vaping devices were enticing kids and young adults to try them. Recent evidence highlights the effects of nicotine on developing brains (i.e., the earlier kids start, the higher the risk), as well as the risk of life-threatening lung disease tied to toxic chemicals being heated (EVALI). In a 2019 outbreak, mostly among 18 - 24-year-olds vaping marijuana, 94% were hospitalized, half in the ICU.) But what parents say and do makes a significant difference in young people’s choices, as today’s guests know well. Dr. Kate Gliske is a research and prevention scientist with the Butler Center for Research, Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation and LeeAnn Mortensen is an Outreach Representative at HBFF, specializing in teens and vaping. In this episode of Mom Enough, Kate and LeeAnn discuss not only risks of vaping, but signs of use, reasons kids vape, effective steps parents can take to prevent vaping and resources to help teens stop. Don’t miss the research-based information and practical tips these guests provide! (Thanks to Mom Enough’s supporting partner, Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, for providing these excellent guests.)
WHAT ARE YOUR GREATEST CONCERNS ABOUT VAPING? What did you learn in this podcast about the known risks of vaping in young people? What do your kids know about the risks and the ways manufacturers of e-cigarettes have tried to hook young people on these products? Check out the resources recommended by today’s guests and consider having your kids explore them with you.
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT VAPING, SUBSTANCE USE AND ABUSE? ❉ PREPARING YOUR CHILD FOR HEALTHY CHOICES ABOUT SUBSTANCE USE: A CONVERSATION WITH DR. JOSEPH LEE FROM THE HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION YOUTH CONTINUUM. Dr. Joseph Lee, Medical Director of the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation Youth Continuum, joins Marti & Erin to bring strong words of hope about the power of the messages you give your children about drugs and alcohol.
❉ VAPING, MARIJUANA AND CAPITALISM: WHAT PARENTS NEED TO KNOW. The long-term effects of vaping nicotine have not been well-studied. With regard to marijuana, legalization of recreational use in many states has led to full-on capitalistic efforts to refine strains, increase strength and offer products designed and labeled to appeal to a target market of potential users. But THC is known to have negative effects on young people’s developing brains, and, for a minority of users of any age, may trigger perceived threats and hallucinations. Dr. Lee makes clear that we need to understand how producers of these products may have their eye on our children.
❉ Some additional resources on vaping and e-cigarettes: Minnesota Department of Health, American Lung Association, Stanford Toolkit, and The U.S. Surgeon General.
❉ For helpful resources on youth and quitting tobacco: Minnesota Health Department, MN Lung Association, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, and The Truth Initiative.
If we think about the kind of friend, spouse, care provider, boss or public leader we want, we probably would name empathy as an essential quality. Empathy encompasses seeing through another’s eyes (cognitive empathy), feeling what that person feels (emotional empathy) and taking action that is attuned to that person’s feelings (compassionate empathy). But how does someone become empathic? At what age are children first capable of empathy? And what is the role of parents and other adults in promoting children’s development of empathy?
In this episode of Mom Enough, Dr. Megan Gunnar, professor in the University of Minnesota’s Institute of Child Development, joins Marti & Erin to discuss early signs of empathy in infancy, the growing capacity for compassionate empathy in the toddler period, and simple, practical ways parents can encourage and expand children’s empathy in everyday interactions at every stage. Nurturing empathy is one of the most important things we can do to help our children grow up to be the kind of people we hope they will be. And it is one powerful way we can be leaders in making the world a better place for all! Thank you to Mom Enough’s longtime supporting partner Help Me Grow for bringing this episode to you.
HOW DO YOU MODEL EMPATHY FOR YOUR CHILDREN? Thinking of children in your family, when did you first notice signs of empathy in them? What have you done (or could you do) to help them develop and use what Dr. Gunnar calls “compassionate empathy”? And what steps can your whole family take to deepen your empathy toward all, even people who seem different from you in background, experience or beliefs?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT EMPATHY? ❉ THE DANISH WAY OF PARENTING: AN INTERVIEW WITH JESSICA JOELLE ALEXANDER. Denmark has frequently been ranked as one of the happiest countries in the world. It is a culture that celebrates togetherness and hygge (cozy conviviality), teaches empathy, and believes children should have a voice and be respected. All of these factors play a part in how Danes parent. Tune into this Mom Enough episode with Jessica Joelle Alexander, best-selling author of The Danish Way of Parenting: What the Happiest People in the World Know About Raising Confident, Capable Kids.
In many ways, this has been a year like no other. A frightening pandemic, online learning, social isolation, and economic hardship for many have triggered increased anxiety and depression among people of all ages. So, as parents, how can we understand and support our children, whatever feelings they are experiencing? How do we maintain our own mental health and wellbeing so that we have the energy to care for our children? And how can we tell if our children’s emotional ups and downs are a natural response to the upheaval in all our lives? Or, if our children's behaviors are signs of more significant mental health issues that may require professional help?
This week’s Mom Enough guest, Stephanie Combey, is Senior Program Director for Children’s Mental Health at St. David’s Center for Child and Family Development (a supporting partner of Mom Enough). Stephanie brings more than 20 years of professional experience and a wealth of solid information to her discussion with Marti and Erin. You will learn how signs of mental health problems show up in the brain, body and behavior of children of all ages; key strategies parents can use to help their children through rough times; and what kinds of therapeutic services are available even during a pandemic.
WHAT ARE YOU MOST CONCERNED ABOUT WHEN IT COMES TO CHILDREN'S MENTAL HEALTH? What new things did you learn about signs and symptoms of mental health problems in children? How can you tell if these signs indicate clinical anxiety or depression? And what are some practical ways parents can help children be resilient through these challenging times?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH? ❉ RECOGNIZING ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION IN CHILDREN. Review this helpful tip sheet from St. David's Center for Child and Family Development with a list of signs and symptoms of depression and anxiety in children.
❉ MENTAL HEALTH, A FAMILY AFFAIR: HOW MANAGING YOUR OWN STRESS AND EMOTIONS SUPPORTS YOUR CHILD’S HEALTH AND WELLBEING. This Mom Enough episode features another expert from St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development, who discusses how to move toward more positive patterns of stress management, with long-term benefits for all.
❉ THE CHEMISTRY OF CALM AND JOY: A CONVERSATION WITH INTEGRATIVE PSYCHIATRIST HENRY EMMONS. Dr. Henry Emmons has spent his career helping people understand and apply the chemistry of emotions, using simple, accessible strategies to manage energy, quiet our minds, build resilience and maximize our experience of calm, joy and well-being. Tune in to learn more!
In the early years of life, children rapidly develop language, learning thousands of words before they start kindergarten. Children can easily learn multiple languages, comfortably transitioning between one and the other. According to University of Chicago psychology professor Katherine Kinzler, children "are remarkable linguistic creatures."
So, how do children learn language? What role does language play in prejudice? And, how can language play a role in how we fare emotionally and socially during the pandemic? Katherine Kinzler, author of How You Say It: Why You Talk the Way You Do and What It Says about You, addresses these questions and more in this thought-provoking interview with Marti and Erin of Mom Enough.
Language is social, "it's about human connection," says Kinzler. And, "we can judge each other based on our speech." It is a human instinct to divide the world into groups or categories. Listen to learn how to be more inclusive and teach your children to treat others equitably and not with prejudice.
HAVE YOU CONSIDERED HOW YOU SAY IT? What do you notice about the ways you communicate about groups instead of individuals? Thinking about words we frequently use, like "boys," "girls," or "they" (in the plural sense), how might you shift your language and speak more about individuals? How will you use language to be more inclusive and avoid prejudice in your children? What will you do to make remote conversations better?
Author Katherine Kinzler, PhD and her two children. WANT TO LEARN MORE HOW YOU SAY IT? AND LANGUAGE DEVELOPMENT? ❉ LEARNING A SECOND LANGUAGE, LEARNING THROUGH LANGUAGE: A CONVERSATION WITH U OF M RESEARCHER MELISSA KOENIG. Very young children have a remarkable capacity to learn whatever language (or languages) they hear. But as we get older, we often struggle at learning a second language and may never “speak like a native” (as Marti learned years ago trying to order a beer in Sweden!). Why is that so? And, as parents, what should we do to support our children’s language development in both their primary language and second and third languages? You won’t want to miss this fascinating and helpful discussion with U of M Researcher Melissa Koenig of a topic of great importance in today’s diverse world.
❉ EFFECTIVE LANGUAGE STIMULATION FOR CHILDREN: BUILDING RICH LANGUAGE LEARNING INTO EVERYDAY LIFE, USING YOUR PRIMARY LANGUAGE AND CULTURAL TRADITIONS. You’ve heard how crucial parents are to children’s language development, but does that prompt you to think, “Oh, no, one more thing I have to do!” If so, this Mom Enough guest will ease your mind with great tips on how to work effective language stimulation into things you already are doing.
In the current political climate, with disrespect and divisiveness being the norm, it may be hard to imagine why our children would want to become good and engaged citizens involved in civic activities. But our future depends on it!
Dr. Anne Klaeysen, Leader Emerita of the New York Society for Ethical Culture, brings many years of experience to this week’s timely Mom Enough show, offering clear and helpful ways to help our children discover their own values, learn what it means to be kind and fair on a large scale and recognize what they can contribute toward building a humane, ethical society, as children and throughout their lives.
WHAT WILL YOU DO TO RAISE ENGAGED CITIZENS? What were some of the questions Dr. Klaeysen suggested asking your children to help them discover their own values? Whatever the ages of your children, ask them some of those questions in language appropriate to their age. What did you learn by listening to your children’s answers and to what extent were you surprised by what they said? Where are opportunities for you and your children to participate with other families to strengthen your own community and become good citizens?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT OUR GUEST? For Dr. Klaeysen's blog, click here.
For NYSEC Youth and Family Programs, click here.
When it comes to "the talk," it can be downright anxiety provoking for parents as they consider what to say and how to say it. Many parents think of the "the talk" as a one time conversation to have when your child is approaching an age when they might be thinking about having sex. But, what if talking the birds and the bees is really supposed to be years of honest conversation that culminates in a child who has all of the details about sex, relationships, and consent long before they are ready to consider having sex?
Tune in to hear Amy Lang, sexual health educator, discuss how and when to start the birds and the bees conversation (it's earlier than you might think), how to avoid TMI (too much information), and simple things that we can do to keep our children safe. With more than 25 years of experience teaching parents how to talk to their children about sex, Lang knows just what to say and how to say it!
As we navigate this often sexually-saturated online world, the task of protecting our children can feel daunting. Lang has tips for this too. She explores ways to address the unfortunate times when our children see too much online, offers suggestions for including our values in the conversation, and shares thought-provoking questions that will help you find your way in the sometimes awkward, yet very important task of educating your kids about sex. Join Marti & Erin in this compelling interview with a leading expert on the Birds and the Bees.
HAVE YOU STARTED TALKING ABOUT THE BIRDS AND THE BEES?
What do you hope for your kids as they grow and develop? What values do you want to share with your children when it comes to sexual health and relationships? In what ways are you on track for your children to know all the details by 10-11? And in what ways do you need to pick up the pace in your conversations on the birds and the bees?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT ADOPTION AND NEFERTITI AUSTIN? ❉ BIRDS AND BEES AND KIDS. Check out Amy Lang's website here for more information on the birds and the bees. Get quick tips, connect with her workshops, listen to her podcast, and learn how you can get one-to-one consultations.
❉ TEACHING OUR CHILDREN ABOUT SEX, LOVE AND EQUALITY. Author Bonnie Rough discovered some surprising lessons about sex education while living in the Netherlands when her children were very young. Ultimately, she learned this is about much more than sex; it is about healthy relationships, grounded in love, respect and equality. Check out this episode to learn more.
❉ TALKING WITH CHILDREN ABOUT SEX: KEYS TO SEXUAL HEALTH AND SAFETY. Dr. Rosenzweig makes a strong case for arming our children with detailed, accurate information about the natural sexual responses humans experience, which in turn will empower our children to make healthy, safe choices now and later. Learn more in this episode of Mom Enough.
What can a mother do when she doesn’t see herself in the pages of parenting books? Or when the resources don’t address her greatest concerns? As a single Black woman who chose to become a mother through adoption, author Nefertiti Austin took to writing her own experiences in her critically acclaimed memoir, Motherhood So White: A Memoir of Race, Gender and Parenting in America.
Tune in this week as she shares her moving and empowering journey to and through motherhood. Nefertiti joins Marti & Erin to discuss when and how to talk to children about race and why it's important for us all to be upstanders when we are out in the world and witness racism, from blatant acts to microagressions. Hear about her powerful letter to her son and so much more in this important and compelling episode of Mom Enough!
WHAT WAS YOUR GREATEST TAKEAWAY FROM OUR DISCUSSION ON MOTHERHOOD SO WHITE? In what ways did you connect with this author's experience of motherhood? How will you begin or continue the conversation on race with your children? What can you do to be an upstander when observing racism?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT ADOPTION AND NEFERTITI AUSTIN? ❉ IN THE COMPLEX WORLD OF ADOPTION, WHAT IS THE RANGE OF EXPERIENCES FOR CHILDREN, ADOPTIVE PARENTS AND BIRTH PARENTS? Marti and Erin welcome authors Kate St. Vincent Vogl and Linda Back McKay, who bring poignant stories of their own experiences with all roles in the adoption triad – adopted child, birth mother placing her child for adoption, and adoptive mother. Their stories will touch you deeply. Tune in to this episode of Mom Enough.
❉ WATCH NEFERTITI AUSTIN ON THE TODAY SHOW.
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Nancy Carlson understands children’s feelings and turns that understanding into delightful picture books that help children confront some of life’s most embarrassing moments.
In this lively, free-wheeling discussion with Marti & Erin, Nancy highlights two of her books: the self-explanatory Sometimes You Barf! and It’s OK to Ask, a wonderful story about how to help your children connect with and respond to children with visible disabilities (a collaboration with Gillette Children’s Specialty Healthcare). Tune in so you and your children can benefit from the insights and humor in this special Mom Enough show.
WHAT DO YOU REMEMBER ABOUT YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING MOMENTS?
What embarrassing experiences do you remember from your childhood? What could adults have done to make it less embarrassing for you? How can you make it easier for your children when they encounter something similar?
WANT MORE INFORMATION ON THIS WEEK'S AUTHOR? ❉ Nancy Carlon's doodles. Check out Nancy Carlson's amazing artwork!
❉ Putting One Foot in Front of the Other. Check out Nancy Carlson's blog.
❉ To the Mom or Dad Who Told Their Child Not to Stare at Mine. Read this mother's open letter about people reacting to her daughter's genetic syndrome.
❉ The Anderson Center. A historic site dedicated to the arts.
❉ Support for Siblings of Children with a Serious Illness or Disabilities. Listen to this episode of Mom Enough with a guest from Pediatric Home Services.
Many of us cringe when we think about our early adolescence and the emotional ups and downs of middle school or junior high, as it used to be called. We may recall being teased or bullied or inexplicably dropped by someone we thought was our best friend forever. Or perhaps we recall insensitive or downright cruel things we said or did to others. (Did you ever write nasty comments in a “slam book”? Or get tearful when you saw what someone wrote about you?)
To what extent is the social world of middle school still the same for today’s young people? And how might our own memories inadvertently shape our children’s experiences, for better or worse? Bestselling author Judith Warner has a fascinating new book on this complex topic, And Then They Stopped Talking to Me: Making Sense of Middle School, and joins Marti & Erin for a rich and personal discussion of those ever-timely issues!
WHAT COMES UP WHEN YOU THINK OF MIDDLE SCHOOL? What are some of your strongest memories of your middle school (or junior high) experience? How did those experiences shape your confidence, determination and emotional well-being, both positively and negatively? What did you learn from those experiences and what do they lead you to say and do to support your children in navigating that time of opportunity and challenge in their own lives?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SUPPORTING YOUR MIDDLE-SCHOOLER? ❉ THE POWER OF THE TEENAGE BRAIN: AN INTERVIEW WITH PSYCHIATRY PROFESSOR AND AUTHOR, DR. DAN SIEGEL In this conversation with Marti & Erin, Dr. Siegel debunks common myths of adolescence, illuminates exciting changes in the teenage brain and offers practical tips for parents and teens.
❉ CHALLENGES & OPPORTUNITIES: WHAT BRAIN DEVELOPMENT SCIENCE TELLS US ABOUT HELPING ADOLESCENTS THRIVE, Dr. Laurence Steinberg, a well-known author, has spent decades studying adolescents and has arrived at a much more positive view of what he terms The Age of Opportunity (the title of his latest book). He joins Marti & Erin for a rich and hopeful discussion of how recent research on adolescent brain development can inform the ways we guide our teens to a healthy, happy, productive adulthood.
Mom Enough® is a participant in the Amazon Associates Program, which means we may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. Your purchase helps Mom Enough continue to offer evidence-based information at no cost to our listeners.
After Jennifer Storm was sexually assaulted when she was only twelve years old, she began to dull her pain with alcohol. Faced with multiple childhood traumas and devastating losses of friends and loved ones, Jennifer eventually turned to drugs, self-harm, and multiple suicide attempts. When she was hospitalized after surviving the last suicide attempt, Jennifer finally found treatment and hope after trauma and addiction. In her recovery, she began to rewrite her life script, moving on to personal health, loving relationships and a career helping others who have been victimized.
In this heartfelt conversation with Marti & Erin, Jennifer discusses her tumultuous journey from trauma and addiction to recovery and hope. She shares the keys to letting go of secrets and shame on the path to healing and recovery. Jennifer’s book, Blackout Girl, originally published in 2008, has just been released by Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation in a 2nd edition. This latest edition includes new chapters, fresh insights on the Me Too movement and other societal changes in the last decade, and a discussion guide for support groups and book clubs. Mom Enough is pleased to have Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation as an ongoing supporting partner.
WHAT DID YOU LEARN ABOUT ADDICTION IN THIS EPISODE? Have you or someone close to you experienced trauma and victimization in childhood or adolescence? What did you hear in Jennifer Storm’s story that resonated with what you know about the impact of childhood trauma? What seemed to be the keys to Jennifer’s process of healing and recovery?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT TRAUMA, ADDICTION, AND RECOVERY? ❉ RAPE, ABUSE, AND INCEST NATIONAL NETWORK (RAINN). The largest anti-sexual violence organization, RAINN runs the National Sexual Assault Hotline (800.656.HOPE, online.rainn.org & rainn.org/es).
❉ HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. Hazelden offers world-renowned addiction and alcohol treatment services, including options for virtual addiction and mental health care and recovery support resources through RecoveryGo.
❉ WOMEN, ALCOHOL MISUSE AND KEYS TO PREVENTION AND RECOVERY. In this Mom Enough episode, Carrie Kappel of Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation discusses the ways isolation, anger, anxiety and depression often contribute to alcohol misuse; critical components of treatment for women; and the role of family members in recovery.
❉ RECOGNIZING AND RESPONDING TO SIGNS OF A POSSIBLE SUBSTANCE ABUSE PROBLEM WITH YOUR ADOLESCENT. Dr. Leslie Adair, Director of Mental Health & Family Services at Hazelden Betty Ford’s adolescent and young adult facility shares tips to recognize signs of possible addiction, to seek evaluation by an experienced professional and if needed, to get appropriate treatment and family support.
In what ways and at what age do children figure out whether or not to trust someone? This week’s Mom Enough guest has fascinating research that sheds light on this important aspect of development.
We often think of infants and very young children as being naively trusting and ready to believe what any adult tells them. But Melissa Koenig, professor in the University of Minnesota's Institute of Child Development, is part of a team of researchers who are showing that even babies know how to be skeptics. These provocative findings raise important questions about how trust enters in to children’s learning and how parents and teachers can earn the trust of children and help them build their ability to recognize honesty at a time when it’s often hard to come by.
WHAT WAS YOUR BIGGEST TAKEAWAY ABOUT CHILDREN AND TRUST? What was surprising to you about Melissa Koenig’s findings about young children and trust? Marti & Erin and their guest talked about the need for parents to be “transparent” with their kids and to only make promises they can keep. Give some real-life examples of when this advice could be implemented.
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT ONLINE LEARNING? ❉ Can children save us from the fake news epidemic? Read this fascinating article by this week's Mom Enough guest, Melissa Koenig, and Valerie Tiberius.
❉ Trust Through the Eyes of Children: A Psychologist’s Perspective and How Children Gauge Trustworthiness: Key Findings. Check out these brief videos for more insights on trust from Melissa Koenig.
❉ Early Language and Experience Lab. Melissa Koenig is the Director of the this lab.
❉ Learning a Second Language, Learning Through Language. Check out this link to listen to Melissa Koenig's previous Mom Enough interview on learning a second language.
As the COVID19 pandemic continues, are your children facing more online learning this fall? And are you wondering how your family can manage the challenges that come with this new responsibility?
Many parents felt overwhelmed when schools were closed in the spring and children suddenly were confronted with online learning. And now, here we are starting a new academic year with countless students facing more distance learning, at least part-time if not full-time.
This is the time to reflect carefully on your children’s needs, interests and personalities. It is also the time to figure out together what it will take for each of your children to succeed online. You might need to consider your own skills and comfort level in supporting your children’s learning -- taking into account your competence or comfort with assuming various teaching responsibilities.
This week’s Mom Enough guest, Lynelle Morgenthaler, brings years of experience with online learning to this practical, helpful discussion. Morgenthaler is Vice President of Learning Design at Edmentum, an online learning company that works with more than 8,000 school districts in 50 states and 75 countries. As a former teacher and mother of two, she offers practical tips for establishing realistic daily schedules, having age-appropriate expectations, and talking with your children about feelings during these difficult times. She also discusses the importance of considering context and content when setting guidelines for screen time under these unprecedented times. Listen to this timely discussion and share with your friends!
ARE YOU PREPARED FOR MORE ONLINE LEARNING? What do you see as the major challenges and benefits of distance learning for your children? In what ways do your children differ from each other in their response to online education? And what practical steps can you take to help each of your children get the most from online education?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT ONLINE LEARNING? ❉ MAKING THE MOST OF ONLINE SCHOOL. Watch this live discussion with learning expert, Kreg Moccia, of Yup (the math learning app).
Did you know that heart disease is the number one killer of women and that death rates are increasing in women ages 35 to 54? And, did you know that women are different than men when it comes to heart health? Too many of us women are not aware, nor do we know about the risk factors and warning signs that are unique to women. But knowledge is power and, in many cases, heart disease in women and related deaths are preventable.
Women of all ages need the information Dr. Elizabeth Grey provides in her conversation with Marti in this week’s Mom Enough show. This is crucial information not only for our own heart health, but also our children’s, whether they are infants or teens; it’s never too early to establish healthy patterns that help prevent heart disease.
WHAT WILL YOU DO TO MAINTAIN YOUR HEART HEALTH?
What new information about heart disease in women did you gain from this Mom Enough discussion with cardiologist Elizabeth Grey? Given her guidance about preventing heart disease, in what ways could you take steps to reduce the risk of heart disease for yourself? For your children?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT WOMEN AND HEART DISEASE?
❉ Heart Disease in Women. Read this tip sheet for more information on women and heart disease.
❉ Minneapolis Health Institute Foundation (MHIF). Learn more about heart disease, read patient stories, and get information on heart disease research through the MHIF.
In what ways have you felt judged or even shamed as a parent? How have you handled the parent shaming? Just as shaming our children undermines their healthy development, shaming other parents undermines them and spills over to their children as well. So, both children and parents benefit from shame-proof environments.
California therapist, coach and writer Mercedes Samudio has a mission to end parent shaming and help parents build a “shame-proof village” that will support them in using effective parenting strategies and sustaining strong, healthy relationships with their children at every age. Marti & Erin loved Mercedes’ wise approach and are glad to have her as part of the Mom Enough village of parent support!
HAVE YOU FELT SHAMED AS A PARENT? In what situations have you felt judged or shamed for the way you parent or the life choices you’ve made as a mom or dad? In what ways have you felt yourself judging other parents? What steps have you taken or could you take to build a positive network with other parents in which you all can be heard, supported and encouraged to find what’s best for your children?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SHAME-PROOF PARENTING? ❉ SHAME-PROOF PARENTING BLOG. Check out Mercedes' blog!
What is your experience with – or knowledge of – transgender individuals? What do you know about the mental health challenges transgender youth may face and factors that help them thrive and succeed in life?
This week, mom and blogger Leslie Lagerstrom (creator of Transparenthood) and child and adolescent psychiatrist Elizabeth Reeve join Marti & Erin for a candid and informative discussion on raising a transgender child. Tune in to learn how to help family and friends accept and support the child and develop a deeper understanding of both the risks and protective factors that influence mental health outcomes for transgender youth.
WHAT WAS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING YOU LEARNED ABOUT TRANSGENDER YOUTH IN THIS EPISODE?
Do you know a transgender person? What did you hear in this Mom Enough discussion that gave you a new perspective on issues faced by transgender youth and their families? How might you support a transgender friend or family member?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT PARENTING TRANSGENDER YOUTH?
❉ TRANSFORMING FAMILIES. "Transforming Families is a community where transgender, gender non-conforming, and questioning youth and their families come together to support each other in a safe, welcoming space."
❉ GENDER SPECTRUM. This organization supports families and professionals create gender sensitive and inclusive environments for children and teens.
❉ PARENTING TRANSGENDER YOUTH OR GENDER NONCONFORMING INDIVIDUALS. Listen to this Mom Enough episode to learn about parental responses that will help or hinder a transgender child's health and well-being, common feelings and concerns for parents navigating raising a transgender child, and appropriate interventions to support families and youth.
❉ PARK NICOLLET'S GENDER SERVICES. One of several healthcare organizations offering care for people of all gender identities and expressions.
Finding the right college can feel overwhelming. From the time kids enter high school, thoughts of “What’s next?” become increasingly important. As your children (and you) begin the search, many questions may come to mind. How do I find the right college for me? Do I want a large university or small college? Close to home or far away? How can I look beyond big name schools to discover a gem I might not have heard of? What do I need to do now to increase my odds of getting in and getting a scholarship or financial aid? How do I prepare an application that stands out from the crowd?
Finding answers can feel daunting. However, there are so many more resources available today — from online college tours to knowledgeable college counselors. Gone are the days of the inches thick guide to all the colleges! Tune in as Mary Hill, Director of College Counseling and Academic Planning at St. Paul Academy and Summit School, addresses many common questions about finding the right college in this informative and important discussion. With college choices on the horizon for Erin’s kids, she and Grandma Marti were soaking up everything this guest had to offer!
WHERE ARE YOU IN THE PROCESS OF FINDING THE RIGHT COLLEGE?
What do you and your children know or think about college or other higher ed options that might work? What practical tips and resources did you learn about in this Mom Enough discussion that could help you and your kids find the right college match for them?
MORE RESOURCES FOR PARENTS OF KIDS WHO ARE GETTING READY FOR COLLEGE:
❉ HOW COLLEGE MAKES OR BREAKS US: A CONVERSATION WITH AUTHOR PAUL TOUGH. Best-selling author, Paul Tough, digs deeply into big ideas, and that certainly is true in his latest book, The Years that Matter Most: How College Makes or Breaks Us. Listen to hear some of what he learned from spending six years exploring colleges in 21 states. He joins Marti & Erin in this podcast to discuss highlights of what he learned and to offer action steps for college admissions, alumni, and public officials who make decisions on higher education funding.
❉ PARENTING COLLEGE STUDENTS: A FREE ONLINE RESOURCE FOR ALL PARENTS. Parenting college students is a new phase of parenting! Jodi Dworkin and Marjorie Savage, from Family Social Science in the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development (CEHD), developed a rich new website, Parenting College Students, to help parents of college students wherever they are.
Between work and children's activities, time in nature can be hard to come by. For urban and suburban parents, nature can feel inaccessible. For parents and families that aren't "outdoorsy," getting in nature can feel daunting. However, there are many benefits of nature that might motivate us all to squeeze in some time in the great outdoors!
Research demonstrates that time in nature increases positive emotions; reduces stress, anger, and fear; decreases blood pressure, heart rate, and muscle tension; and improves attention and enjoyment in learning. Whether you are the most outdoorsy or a complete novice when it comes to getting outdoors tune in to this week's episode for tips for incorporating nature into your home, passions, travel, and even volunteering experiences. Listen as writer, nature psychology enthusiast and Happy Science Mom Blogger, Sandi Schwartz, discusses what she has learned as a mom and scientist about simple ways to enjoy the many benefits of nature.
WHAT WILL YOU DO TO ENJOY THE BENEFITS OF NATURE (MORE)?
What are you currently doing to integrate nature into your family's life? What have you noticed when you are in nature? Are there things that get in the way of spending time in nature? What might you do to bridge those barriers? What idea(s) from this show will you try with your children?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT NATURE BENEFITS AND SOME OF THE THINGS DISCUSSED IN THIS EPISODE?
❉ FINDING NATURE. Check out this website from Children & Nature Network for resources, events, and stories & insights to help you connect with nature.
❉ 10 NATURE ACTIVITIES TO HELP GET YOUR FAMILY THROUGH THE CORONAVIRUS PANDEMIC. Read this guest blog post by Richard Louv, author of Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature-Deficit Disorder, The Nature Principle, and Vitamin N.
❉ GIVING YOUR CHILDREN THE BENEFITS OF NATURE EXPERIENCE: A CONVERSATION WITH THE DIRECTOR OF THE UNIVERSITY OF MINNESOTA’S LAB SCHOOL. Listen as University of Minnesota Lab school director Sheila Williams Ridge joins Marti & Erin to talk about why nature experience is so important, both at school and at home. She offers simple ways we can connect our children with nature, wherever we live and whatever our resources.
Childhood obesity is a significant public health issue affecting more than 13 million children in the United States. The rising trend of obesity poses a challenge for parents who want to help their children attain and maintain a healthy weight. With many myths and misconceptions about healthy eating and weight, it is difficult to know the best approach to help our children (and ourselves!).
Tune in to this Mom Enough episode to learn what the latest research is showing about best methods to help prevent and treat childhood obesity. University of Minnesota clinical psychologist and obesity researcher, Dr. Carol Peterson, shares evidence-based approaches to help children and teens attain a healthy weight. She also discusses common myths and misconceptions about healthy eating and weight, highlights the connection between emotions and eating habits, and shares how technology (yes, even cell phones) can be a key tool to researching and treating obesity in teens. Listen to this fascinating discussion and learn how your teen can participate in a research-based weight-loss treatment program.
WHAT WAS YOUR BIGGEST TAKEAWAY ABOUT CHILDHOOD OBESITY IN THIS EPISODE?
What myths and misconceptions have you held about healthy eating and weight loss? After hearing this episode, what will you do differently as you support your child or teen in maintaining or attaining a healthy weight? What have you noticed about your relationship with food? How have your emotions played a role in your eating habits? How might you use your own awareness about these things to help your children?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT CHILDHOOD AND ADOLESCENT OBESITY?
❉ FRESH TEEN WEIGHT LOSS RESEARCH STUDY. Check out this link for more information on participating in the research study discussed in this Mom Enough episode.
❉ PREVENTING OBESITY IN CHILDREN AND TEENS: A FAMILY AFFAIR. Want to learn more about preventing obesity in children and teens using a family-focused approach? Tune in to this episode with Dr. Daheia Barr-Anderson, who has spent her career trying to untangle the individual, family and community factors that contribute to overweight and obesity in children and adolescents.
“Who is interested in shaping your child’s attitudes around money?” That is the first question posed by this week’s Mom Enough children and money guest, Nathan Dungan, financial advisor and founder of Share, Save, Spend.
The answer to that question – and examples of how our culture lures our kids to spend, spend, spend – should make us all sit up and take notice! But we do not need to be powerless; from 5-minute family money meetings to teachable moments at the grocery store, restaurant or ATM, this Mom Enough episode is packed with ways to clarify your own values about money, instill those values in your children, and give your kids voice and choice in family money decisions.
HOW DO YOU INVOLVE YOUR CHILDREN IN FAMILY DECISIONS ABOUT MONEY?
What practical ideas did you get from this Mom Enough discussion about children and money? How are these tips different from what you currently do and what next steps could you take to build your children’s money wisdom?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT CHILDREN AND FAMILY MONEY DECISIONS?
❉ TEACHABLE MONEY MOMENTS WITH YOUR CHILD. Check out this document for tips to ignite money conversations.
❉ SHARE SAVE SPEND MONEY & MEANING BLOG. For insights and wisdom from Nathan Dungan, check out this blog. Consider reading the helpful article, "Talking About Financial Uncertainty with Your School-Age Children."
❉ CAMPAIGN FOR A COMMERCIAL-FREE CHILDHOOD. Click here to learn more about the important work this organization is doing.
Do you ever wonder if there is a radically different way to parent? Or if perhaps a cultural shift in the way we parent is warranted? The Danish way of parenting may just be the way to go.
Denmark has frequently been ranked as one of the happiest countries in the world. It is a culture that celebrates togetherness and hygge (cozy conviviality), teaches empathy, and believes children should have a voice and be respected. All of these factors play a part in how Danes parent.
So, what can we learn from the Danish way? Tune into this Mom Enough episode with Jessica Joelle Alexander, best-selling author of The Danish Way of Parenting: What the Happiest People in the World Know About Raising Confident, Capable Kids. Listen and learn why ultimatums aren't helpful and why empathy, "equal dignity" and happy times together are key to raising self-assured and joyful children.
WHAT WERE YOUR BIGGEST TAKEAWAYS FROM THE DANISH WAY OF PARENTING?
What two things will you do differently as a parent after listening to this episode? What do you notice as the most striking difference in the Danish Way compared to the American way? How do you think the Danish Way of Parenting would benefit your children?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT EUROPEAN APPROACHES TO CHILD-REARING AND EDUCATION?
❉ TEACHING OUR CHILDREN ABOUT SEX, LOVE AND EQUALITY. Tune into this conversation with Bonnie Rough to hear what she learned while living in the Netherlands with her young children.
❉ WHY ARE FINLAND'S SCHOOLS SUCCESSFUL? Read this article to learn more about Finland's unique approach to education.
Countless children (and adults, for that matter!) are in the habit of nail-biting, hair-twisting, thumb-sucking or nose-picking. When might those behaviors be cause for concern? Even if they are apparently harmless habits, are there reasons to try to put an end to them?
University of Minnesota pediatrician Dr. Andy Barnes brings reassurance and practical advice to this week’s lively chat with Marti & Erin!
Note: You will want to stay tuned through the end of the show for a Relationships that Nurture brief from St. David’s Center. This segment addresses what you can do to ease your child’s separation anxiety.
WHAT HABITS DO YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN NOTICE? Does your child have a habit, like nail-biting, hair-twisting, thumb-sucking or nose-picking, you’d like to bring to a stop? What purpose do you think that behavior serves for your child? Is there a more acceptable behavior that might serve the same purpose? What ideas did you get from this week’s Mom Enough show about how to understand and respond to your child’s habit?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SELF-REGULATION & SOOTHING BEHAVIORS, BEYOND THE HABITS DISCUSSED IN THIS EPISODE? ❉ PARENTING THROUGH THE PANDEMIC: SENSORY NEEDS & EMOTIONAL REGULATION. Tune is as occupational therapist, Kate Biederman, shares practical tips to meet our sensory needs and to regulate our emotions during the pandemic.
❉ FINDING THE RIGHT “SENSORY DIET” FOR YOU AND YOUR CHILD: PRACTICAL STRATEGIES FOR REGULATING EMOTION AND SUSTAINING OPTIMAL ENERGY. Listen to this episode to become more aware of “sensory diets” and how we can identify the sensory tools and techniques that will help our children be their best at home and in the community.
The stress and uncertainty of the COVID19 pandemic can make it hard for people in addiction recovery to maintain their sobriety. The losses associated with layoffs, school closings and stay-at-home orders also may reveal previously unidentified problems with substance use. At the same time, the need for social distancing can increase people’s reluctance to seek or accept in-person treatment or support. With all of those things in mind, the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation (HBFF) has seized this opportunity to accelerate and expand their offerings of virtual addiction treatment and recovery services through RecoveryGo. Including both a Virtual Intensive Outpatient program and Day Treatment, virtual addiction treatment offers the same professional staff, curricula, amount of care, fellowship, accountability and safety checks as in-person treatment. Preliminary evaluations show virtual treatment to be as effective and to have higher patient satisfaction and lower drop-out rates than in-person treatment.
In addition to treatment programs, there are many options for ongoing virtual support and free online resources to help people sustain recovery. And for families who have a loved one struggling with addiction, HBFF offers a Virtual Family Program, Children’s Program, and Virtual Mental Health Services.
Janelle Wesloh, Vice President of Clinical Excellence, Innovation and Recovery Management at HBFF, brings more than 25 years of experience in the addiction treatment field to this energetic discussion with Mom Enough co-hosts Marti & Erin. Recognizing how the current public health crisis has highlighted the need for virtual services in the field of addiction, Janelle also sees how valuable these services will be beyond the pandemic. As Marti & Erin note, their own respective work with mothers dealing with substance abuse has made them acutely aware of how valuable it could be for a parent with an infant or young child to be able to get virtual treatment and/or recovery support, as long as measures are in place to ensure the safety and wellbeing of the child. Tune in to learn about the innovative options available at Hazelden Betty Ford.
WHAT DO YOU SEE AS ADVANTAGES OF VIRTUAL ADDICTION TREATMENT? Which of the virtual services or online resources that Janelle Wesloh discussed caught your attention? Who in your own family or among your friends and colleagues would benefit from knowing about some of these services? And how could you initiate a sensitive and respectful conversation about the availability of these online options?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT ADDICTION? ❉ WOMEN, ADDICTION AND MENTAL HEALTH. Dr. Sarah Wicks, a clinical psychologist at Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, joins Marti & Erin in this Mom Enough episode to discuss unique challenges faced by women dealing with addiction and, more broadly, how to approach a loved on (male or female) you believe has a substance use problem.
❉ PARENTAL ADDICTION: IMPACT ON THE PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIP & HOW TO HEAL TOGETHER. Helene Photias, national director of operations for the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation's Children's Program, and Paula Frisk, senior director of zero to five home visiting programs at St. David's Center for Child & Family Development, join Marti & Erin to discuss keys to helping parents and children move toward healing, build more positive and secure relationships, and create the fun and joy that every child and parent deserves.
Did you know that a hug, a soft and fuzzy robe, or rough-and-tumble play might all be a part of how we cope during challenging times? We each have different emotional regulation and sensory needs. Tending to these unique needs is important during difficult times, like the current pandemic. How are you and your children doing with emotional and sensory regulation during the stress of the pandemic?
Families around the globe are facing unprecedented health and economic threats, with great uncertainty about how long-lasting and severe both will be. On top of those overarching challenges, most of us are many weeks into school closings, layoffs from work (or trying to work from home while our kids do online school), isolation from friends and family outside of our households, and cancellation of our favorite sports, arts and other recreational activities. We may feel overwhelmed, bored, lonely, frustrated, anxious or depressed. Or we may feel relieved to have a break from the usual hectic schedules of our ordinary lives and relish home-cooked meals and cozy evenings watching movies or playing family games. (If you’re like Mom Enough co-hosts Marti & Erin, you may feel all of those things from one day to the next – or even within one day!)
This week’s guest, Kate Biederman, brings a fresh perspective to these challenges and opportunities, drawing on more than 30 years of work as a pediatric occupational therapist, 23 of those years at St. David’s Center for Child and Family Development (a longtime supporting partner of Mom Enough). As Clinical Supervisor of Occupational Therapy, Kate knows that children’s “occupations” include play, learning, social interactions and, as she says, “getting through the day without falling apart” – all of which are likely to be challenged by this current situation. But Kate brings an important brain-body perspective to guide us in how to enhance the ways our children – and we! – navigate these challenging times. From establishing new routines and a predictable schedule, to using movement, touch, sounds and foods to maintain regulation, Kate provides reassurance and practical tips. She introduces the concept of “heavy work” and the ways it can both calm and energize us and our children. And she provides wise guidance about how to communicate our own needs and personal boundaries to our children, as well as how to get down on the floor and follow our children’s interests, letting them lead and teach us as we tap into our own inner child. Tune in to learn more and to tap into the wealth of sensory and emotional regulations tools available to us right at home!
WHAT SENSORY AND EMOTIONAL REGULATION TECHNIQUES WILL YOU USE? What have you experienced during the pandemic and the resulting shutdowns? What have been the most challenging things for you about this time? And what, if anything, has been a relief or a pleasant surprise about the restrictions we are facing? How have your children handled things like school closures, online learning, not being able to play with friends and fears aroused by what they hear about the virus? What practical tips in this Mom Enough discussion struck a chord with you, and what steps could you take to help you and your children navigate these uncertain times and even build some habits you can continue when we move into easier times?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SENSORY NEEDS AND EMOTIONAL REGULATION?
❉ FINDING THE RIGHT “SENSORY DIET” FOR YOU AND YOUR CHILD: PRACTICAL STRATEGIES FOR REGULATING EMOTION AND SUSTAINING OPTIMAL ENERGY. Listen to this episode to become more aware of "sensory diets" and how we can identify the sensory tools and techniques that will help our children be their best at home and in the community.
❉ SENSORY AND MOTOR DEVELOPMENT IN YOUNG CHILDREN: MILESTONES, RED FLAGS AND HELPFUL TIPS. Tune in to this episode to learn how to identify developmental milestones and support your infant's sensory and motor development.
Busy parents often need a way to “contain” their babies. Whether it’s to prepare dinner, or get a much-needed shower, bouncy seats and other “containers” are a helpful way to keep your baby safe while your hands are busy. We all know parents need a break from time to time! So, while parents are trying to do what is best for their babies, might they be putting their infants at risk if they overuse containers?
“Container babies,” as they have come to be called, are infants who spend too much time in containers that limit free movement. In the early 2000s, there was a steep rise in “container baby syndrome” – movement, cognitive, behavioral and physical problems related to spending too much time contained in car seats, strollers, bouncy seats, swings, jumpers, rockers, Exersaucers®, and seats. While it is completely normal, and sometimes a necessity (i.e., in the case of car seats), to contain babies, there are some risks associated with extended time in containers. Movement is essential to infant development, especially brain development, so long periods in a container that limit movement can interfere with normal infant development. Tune in to this informative episode, brought to you by Help Me Grow, as infant movement expert Dr. Carol Leitschuh enlightens us on “container babies,” tummy time success tips, alternatives to baby seats and jumpers, and the importance of free movement for infant development.
WHAT WAS YOUR BIGGEST TAKEAWAY ABOUT "CONTAINER BABIES"? What changes will you make to your use of “baby containers” after hearing this Mom Enough episode? How will you integrate the suggestions for tummy time? What creative ideas do you have to limit your infant’s time in a container?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT INFANT DEVELOPMENT? ❉ HELP ME GROW MINNESOTA. Help Me Grow offers helpful resources on tracking developmental milestones, encouraging healthy development, and getting help for a child. They are currently accepting and responding to referrals for anyone who has a concern about their child’s development.
❉ PATHWAYS. Free tools to maximize children's motor, sensory, and communication development.
❉ SAFE INFANT SLEEP RECOMMENDATIONS: A DISCUSSION OF NEW AAP GUIDELINES AND RELATED CONCERNS OF SOME FAMILIES AND HEALTH PROFESSIONALS. Therapist Crystal Clancy discusses the AAP guidelines related to infant sleep in this Mom Enough® episode.
Are you cautious and protective with your daughter? Or are you encouraging her to be a gutsy girl? Studies have shown that parents are likely either to warn their daughters away from challenging physical activities or to help them so much that they don’t accomplish the task on their own. With sons, however, parents are more likely to “be brave” and to guide them in how to complete the task on their own.
Caroline Paul believes we too often undermine girls’ competence and self-esteem and deprive them of exhilarating adventures. So she’s written a unique guidebook for girls (and women!) called The Gutsy Girl: Escapades for Your Life of Epic Adventure. This book is packed with stories of her own adventures and those of other daring women, practical tips on changing a tire or climbing a mountain, entertaining illustrations by Wendy McNaughton, and space for the reader to journal about her own escapades. She brings her ideas to life in this enthusiastic conversation with Marti, who describes a few adventures of her own!
ARE YOU RAISING YOUR DAUGHTER TO BE A GUTSY GIRL? What messages did you get as a girl about taking on challenging or somewhat risky activities? To what extent are your messages to your daughter the same or different? Would you like to encourage your daughter to be more adventurous? And would you like to have some lively adventures yourself? How could you begin?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT RAISING A GUTSY GIRL? ❉ WHY DO WE TEACH GIRLS THAT IT'S CUTE TO BE SCARED? Check out Caroline's New York Times article.
❉ THE GUTSY GIRL CLUB ON INSTAGRAM. The Gutsy Girl website is now on social media. Check out this instagram link, or find the Gutsy Girl Club on Facebook.
❉ EMPOWER GIRLS TO BECOME STRONG WOMEN. Longtime educator and founder of aWe, Inc. (Academy for Women’s Empowerment), Kristi Hemmer joins Marti & Erin for an important and provocative discussion of the ways girls and women give away their power through speech, body language and attributions that dismiss their own talent and hard work.
Mom Enough® only shares recommendations for products or books we have independently reviewed. As an Amazon Associate, Mom Enough may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. Your purchase helps Mom Enough continue to offer evidence-based information at no cost to our listeners.
As mothers, we often feel pressure to live up to what we think someone else expects of us. And, however we define “success” as a mother, we often seem to question whether we are measuring up. That certainly was true for the Minnesota moms who participated in an anthropological study conducted by Dr. Solveig Brown. She explores the results of this study in her book, All On One Plate: Cultural Expectations on American Mothers.
In this episode of Mom Enough, Solveig joins Marti & Erin for a heartfelt discussion of the doubt and guilt so many moms experience, the ways moms have found to cope with the multiple pressures they feel, and the powerful role of support and shared stories in easing moms’ struggles. Tune in to learn more about cultural expectations on American mothers!
WHAT CULTURAL EXPECTATIONS HAVE YOU NOTICED AS A MOTHER? What do you see as most important to being a “good mom” in today’s world? What comes most easily to you as a mom and what are the biggest challenges you face in measuring up to your own expectations? What could you do to ease the pressure you feel and how could you strengthen your support network (if you think you need to)?
TO LEARN MORE ABOUT CULTURAL EXPECTATIONS ON AMERICAN MOTHERS, CHECK OUT THE FOLLOWING: ❉ ALL ON ONE PLATE: CULTURAL EXPECTATIONS ON AMERICAN MOTHER'S. Click this link to learn more about Solveig's book.
❉ A READER'S GUIDE FOR ALL ON ONE PLATE. For Solveig's All On One Plate discussion guide, click here.
Mom Enough® only shares recommendations for products or books we have independently reviewed. As an Amazon Associate, Mom Enough may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. Your purchase helps Mom Enough continue to offer evidence-based information at no cost to our listeners.
What does it mean to be a parent who leads? And can leadership skills really make a difference as a parent? Absolutely, according to this week’s guest.
Listen as Dr. Alyssa F. Westring, Associate Professor of Management at the Driehaus College of Business, DePaul University, and Director of Research for Total Leadership, shares insights into the many ways leadership skills benefit parents at work and at home. Westring highlights what it means to be a parent who leads and how parents and families can use leadership skills to home in on their values and create a “collective family vision.” She encourages us to ask ourselves where we want to be in 5 to 10 years and to consider that vision as we make choices as parents and as a family.
Co-author of Parents Who Lead: The Leadership Approach You Need to Parent with Purpose, Fuel Your Career, and Create a Richer Life, Westring discusses the “Four-Way Wins” method to help overwhelmed parents refocus their attention, so that their lives are in closer alignment with their priorities. This method encompasses integrating career (not necessarily current paid work, but what you are trained to do), family, community, and self, including body, mind, and spirit. She advises us to ask ourselves how these domains of life interact, how much energy and time we are dedicating to each domain, how happy we are in each domain, and how important each domain is to us. This allows us to use the “Four-Way View” to evaluate our lives and then make changes to create win-win-win-wins -- where we do not have to sacrifice one domain to achieve happiness or success in another. Tune in to learn more from this inspiring and thought-provoking episode!
IN WHAT WAYS ARE YOU A LEADER AS A PARENT? What core values drive your life as an individual and in your family? What do you want the next 10-15 years to look like? What two or three things will be important for you to include in your vision for your family? Are there choices you are making now that no longer fit with that vision? What steps can you take to live in greater alignment with your vision?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT PARENTS WHO LEAD AND THIS WEEK'S AUTHOR? ❉ WORKING MOMS: FRESH PERSPECTIVES FROM GROWN CHILDREN OF WORKING MOTHERS. Although a majority of moms are employed during their childrearing years, many working moms still experience a nagging concern that their children some day will look back on their childhood and feel short-changed. Listen as business leader and mother Pam Lenehan shines light on the overwhelmingly positive views of adult children reflecting on their moms’ work and the impact it had on their development.
❉ THE SECRET LIFE OF A WORK-LIFE INSIDER. Watch Alyssa Westring's TEDx Talk below.
❉ PARENTS WHO LEAD: THE LEADERSHIP APPROACH YOU NEED TO PARENT WITH PURPOSE, FUEL YOUR CAREER, AND CREATE A RICHER LIFE. Purchase the book to learn more about using leadership skills to create the life you want to lead.
Mom Enough® only shares recommendations for products or books we have independently reviewed. As an Amazon Associate, Mom Enough may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. Your purchase helps Mom Enough continue to offer evidence-based information at no cost to our listeners.
Identifying autism spectrum disorder at an earlier age is becoming easier. Although parents may fear having their child identified as having special needs, early identification and intervention greatly improve a child’s chances for lifelong success and wellbeing.
Dr. Jennifer Hall-Lande, autism researcher at the University of Minnesota’s Institute of Community Integration, joins Marti & Erin to help parents understand the process of developmental screening, assessment and intervention. This show highlights the value of Help Me Grow as a source of information and support for parents of all young children. (A special thanks to Help Me Grow for supporting this important show and for being an ongoing partner of Mom Enough.)
WHY IS EARLY SCREENING FOR AUTISM SPECTRUM DISORDER IMPORTANT? Why is a “wait and see” approach not a good idea for a child who is presenting signs of a possible autism spectrum disorder? What did you learn in this Mom Enough show about assessment and early intervention with children with ASD?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT DEVELOPMENTAL MILESTONES? ❉ HELP ME GROW MINNESOTA. Explore resources on developmental milestones, encouraging healthy development, and how to get help for a child from Help Me Grow.
❉ LEARN THE SIGNS. ACT EARLY. Check out these helpful developmental milestone tracking tools from the CDC.
❉ MINNESOTA ACT EARLY. Minnesota Act Early reaches out to families, communities, and organizations to promote early screening and early identification of potential developmental delays.
❉ UNDERSTANDING THE EARLY SIGNS OF AUTISM SPECTRUM DISORDER: A CONVERSATION WITH DR. JED ELISON FROM THE UNIVERSITY OF MINNESOTA. Tune in to this important episode to learn more about early signs of autism spectrum disorder.
Do you ever miss your old day planner? Or are you an avid journal keeper, who is struggling to compose a paragraph at the end of a long day in your life as a parent? In the digital age, is there really a reason to go analog? New York Times bestselling author and inventor of the Bullet Journal Method, Ryder Carroll, believes there is.
Carroll has found creative and quick ways we can use analog (pen and paper) to be more intentional about the lives we want to create. In this conversation with Mom Enough’s Dr. Erin Erickson, he shares the benefits of going analog and his method to mindfully organize, keep track of activities, set goals, and make our visions a reality. Listen to insights from his international bestselling book, The Bullet Journal Method: Track the Past, Order the Present, Design the Future, and get motivated to grab a pen and a journal and take charge of your life.
WILL YOU CONSIDER TRYING THE BULLET JOURNAL METHOD? What did you resonate with the most in the interview with Ryder Carroll? How might you respond differently to writing something down by hand compared to typing or using your computer? In what ways would going analog help you be more intentional and mindful?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT BULLET JOURNALING? ❉ Want to start a Bullet Journal? Click here to learn how to Bullet Journal. Or watch this video:
❉ Watch Ryder Carroll's TEDx talk, "How to Declutter Your Mind":
Many of us are uneasy talking with our teens about topics related to adolescent sexual health, such as how to prevent sexually transmitted infections or choose the most effective birth control. We may worry that talking about these issues will encourage our kids to become sexually active too soon. But our sons and daughters are more likely to make wise and healthy choices if we talk openly and supportively with them.
Family physician, Amy Bonifas, joins Marti & Erin for a candid and informative discussion of what your teens need to know and what you can expect when you take your adolescent daughter for a medical visit.
WHAT HAVE YOU TAUGHT YOUR ADOLESCENTS ABOUT SEXUAL HEALTH? How do you feel about talking with them about this sensitive and important topic? What did you find most helpful and interesting in Marti & Erin’s teen sexual health conversation with Dr. Bonifas?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT TALKING WITH YOUR KIDS ABOUT SEXUAL HEALTH? ❉ TALKING WITH CHILDREN ABOUT SEX: KEYS TO SEXUAL HEALTH AND SAFETY. Author Janet Rosenzweig, Executive Director of the American Professional Society on the Abuse of Children and a longtime sex educator and author, joins Marti & Erin to talk about what it means to speak comfortably and accurately about sex with children and teens.
❉ TEACHING OUR CHILDREN ABOUT SEX, LOVE AND EQUALITY: A CONVERSATION ABOUT SEX EDUCATION WITH AUTHOR BONNIE ROUGH. Author Bonnie Rough discovered some surprising lessons about teaching our children about sex, love, and equality while living in the Netherlands when her children were very young. Learn about her experience and book, Beyond Birds & Bees: Bringing Home a New Message to Our Kids about Sex, Love and Equality, in this episode of Mom Enough.
❉ THE SEX-WISE PARENT & THE PARENT'S GUIDE TO TALKING ABOUT SEX. Check out these great books from Mom Eough guest, Dr. Janet Rosenzweig. Or better yet, purchase them here (click book image to purchase):
❉ ERIN'S RECOMMENDED BOOKS ABOUT SEX FOR KIDS:
For 4 years old and up (click book image to learn more or to purchase book):
For 7 years old and up (click book image to learn more or to purchase book):
Mom Enough® only shares recommendations for products or books we have independently reviewed. As an Amazon Associate, Mom Enough may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. Your purchase helps Mom Enough continue to offer evidence-based information at no cost to our listeners.
Most parenting advice is focused on how to raise our children. But should we perhaps be focusing on how to raise an adult?
While our job as parents is to love, care for, and teach our children, the purpose of our role is to raise a contributing member of society as our children reach adulthood. Well-intentioned parents have taken the reins in attempts to ensure positive outcomes for their children, but they’ve forgotten that if they are the driver, how will their children learn to find their way on their own? How did we get to this place? Why do we need to stop overparenting? Is there another way?
New York Times bestselling author, Julie Lythcott-Haims, answers these questions and shares wisdom and insights from her book, How to Raise an Adult, in this compelling episode of Mom Enough.
HOW WILL YOU RAISE AN ADULT? In what ways have you overparented your children? What hopes and fears play into your overparenting? After listening to this interview, what three steps will you take to shift away from parental overinvolvement? How have you shifted your perspective on what it means to be the parent you want to be?
WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ JULIE LYTHCOTT-HAIMS’ WEBSITE. Learn more about Lythcott-Haims’ work, including her critically-acclaimed and award-winning prose poetry memoir, Real American. You can also sign up for her newsletter.
❉ THE POWER OF AGENCY: KEYS TO LIVING LIFE ON YOUR OWN TERMS. Listen as psychologist Dr. Anthony Rao (Tony) highlights key principles from his book, The Power of Agency.
❉ UNLEASHING THE INSTINCT TO PLAY: PATHWAYS TO JOY, COMPETENCE AND CREATIVITY IN PRETEND PLAY. Psychologist Peter Gray shares his conclusions about what is missing from children's lives in terms of pretend play and exploration without adult direction in this Mom Enough episode.
❉ FREE RANGE KIDS: A CONVERSATION WITH AUTHOR AND ACTIVIST LENORE SKENAZY. When Lenore Skenazy wrote about letting her then nine-year-old son ride the subway alone in New York City, she never imagined the uproar it would cause. In this lively discussion with Marti & Erin, she reflects on how you can let the children in your life be free range kids.
Neuroscience research has led to a new understanding of how early childhood experience, especially parent-child attachment, affects neural connections in our brain, in turn shaping the way we think, feel and behave in later relationships and situations. But, as UCLA psychiatrist Dan Siegel discusses with Marti & Erin, our “mind” is more than our “brain,” and remembering and reflecting on our own childhood experiences can help us build new neural pathways and new ways of behaving at any age.
Get ready to take notes as you listen to this deep and important discussion of how reflective parenting can help us achieve greater well-being for ourselves and our children. And, consider reading Dr. Dan Siegel's thought-provoking and mind-changing book, Mind: A Journey to the Heart of Being Human, for a deeper dive into this fascinating subject.
HOW HAS REFLECTION ON PAST EXPERIENCES SHAPED YOUR MIND AND PARENTING? In this Mom Enough discussion of the mind, Dr. Dan Siegel and Marti talk about the importance of reflecting on “implicit” memories so that they can become “explicit” and can be integrated into your understanding of how you respond to parenting challenges. When have you experienced an intense emotional reaction to your child’s behavior in a way that probably was fueled by some memory from your own childhood? What could you do differently the next time those emotions start to bubble up in a situation with your child?
WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ THE POWER OF THE TEENAGE BRAIN: AN INTERVIEW WITH PSYCHIATRY PROFESSOR AND AUTHOR, DR. DAN SIEGEL. In this conversation with Marti & Erin, Dr. Siegel debunks common myths of adolescence, illuminates exciting changes in the teenage brain and offers practical tips for parents and teens.
❉ THE WHOLE-BRAIN CHILD: DR. DAN SIEGEL’S INNOVATIVE STRATEGIES FOR NURTURING YOUR CHILD’S DEVELOPING MIND. Listen as Dr. Siegel draws on recent brain research to offer an effective and innovative framework for teaching our children to understand how their brains work and use that knowledge to achieve balance, insight and strategies for coping with frustration, disappointment and conflict.
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Learning math is sometimes hard, and always important. Do you struggle to help your children learn math? You are not alone! Math is taught so differently today than when we were growing up. Our understanding of math learning and teaching has expanded, and our uses of math have changed dramatically with technological advances, such as artificial intelligence and machine learning.
Dr. Judah Schwartz, Professor of Education Emeritus at the Harvard Graduate School of Education, joins Mom Enough to broaden our understanding of two important math learning concepts: conceptual understanding and procedural fluency. Conceptual understanding is when students know why a mathematical concept is important and when to use that concept. Procedural fluency is understanding the procedures used in math, and knowing how to use or adapt them for different circumstances. Tune in to this intellectually stimulating conversation on math learning, brought to you by supporting partner, Yup (an awesome math tutoring app with 24-7 access to top-notch teachers).
HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT HELPING YOUR CHILD WITH LEARNING MATH?
What is your greatest challenge when it comes to supporting your child's math learning? What are you observing as far as your child's math learning? Are they developing both conceptual understanding and procedural learning? How are your children’s teachers helping them think more deeply about math, and not just recite math facts?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT MATH EDUCATION?
❉ CHECK OUT THE YUP TUTORING APP. Erin's kids love how easy it is for them to get help whenever they need it - 24/7. Learn how this app might help your children learn math.
❉ 3 WAYS TO EXPLAIN THE IMPORTANCE OF MATH TO YOUR CHILDREN. Read this helpful information from Mom Enough's newest supporting partner, Yup.
❉ HELP YOUR CHILD LEARN MATH: PRACTICAL TIPS FROM YUP. Listen as Kreg Maccio, experienced teacher, dean and now leader of academic development for the Yup math tutoring app, provides a useful framework for thinking about how to help our children build the skills, good sense and confidence to succeed in math.
❉ PROMOTING YOUR CHILD’S MATH SKILLS AND CONFIDENCE: PUTTING MATH IN A POSITIVE LIGHT. University of Minnesota professor, Michele Mazzocco, joins Marti & Erin for an encouraging and interesting discussion of how to help your children discover that math is fun, doable and relevant to everyday life in this episode of Mom Enough.
❉ INSPIRING YOUR CHILDREN TO LOVE MATH: A CONVERSATION WITH PROFESSOR LESA CLARKSON FROM THE U OF M’S COLLEGE OF EDUCATION AND HUMAN DEVELOPMENT. Lesa Clarkson describes fun and interesting activities we can do with our kids at every age to get them excited about math in everyday life and possibly inspire them to love math!
Maternal depression and anxiety are very common. Have you or someone you know experienced depression or serious anxiety since becoming a mom? Given the prevalence of these mental health problems among mothers, your answer almost certainly is yes. Yet too often these disorders go undiagnosed and untreated -- in part because of stigma. Stigma is when people are unfairly viewed in negative ways because of their circumstances or a quality. It's essential that we work together as a community to challenge the stigma associated with mental illness.
It’s important for all of us to understand the signs of maternal depression and anxiety, safe and effective treatment options and how family and friends can help. Psychiatrist Michelle Wiersgalla and psychologist Gabrielle Mauren from Park Nicollet Health Services join Marti & Erin for an informative and candid discussion everyone should hear.
WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT MATERNAL DEPRESSION & ANXIETY? What has your experience been in your family or circle of friends with depression, anxiety or OCD? Why do you think these problems still are so unlikely to be properly diagnosed or treated among the many mothers (and others) who experience them? What can you do to help reduce the stigma associated with mental health problems?
WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ EXERCISE AND MENTAL HEALTH: UNIVERSITY OF MINNESOTA’S DR. BETH LEWIS DISCUSSES THE PSYCHOLOGY OF EXERCISE. Listen to this episode to learn more about research demonstrating the mental health benefits associated with physical activity.
❉ POSTPARTUM DEPRESSION (PPD) AND ANXIETY: WHEN THE “BABY BLUES” DON’T FADE AWAY. Psychologist Krista Post, clinical director of the Postpartum Counseling Center, knows there is no shame in seeking help and there is light at the end of the tunnel. Not only has she worked with many families facing postpartum depression, but she experienced it herself after giving birth to twins. Don’t miss this encouraging and informative Mom Enough show!
In a world dominated by electronic devices, many of us worry about the longterm impact on our children, especially those who get hooked on screen time at an early age. What is a good age to introduce screens? How much time is too much? To what extent are very young children learning useful things from screen time? What beneficial experiences are children missing when they spend hours each day passively viewing or interacting with electronic devices? And how about our own use of devices and the effects on our children and our relationship with them?
Dr. Megan Gunnar, a world-renown expert from the University of Minnesota’s Institute of Child Development (and grandmother to two adorable infants), joins Marti & Erin for an information-packed, thought-provoking discussion of this timely topic. Listen and learn what you can do to help make sure you and your child take advantage of digital technology, but don’t let it take control of your life! This episode of Mom Enough is brought to you by Help Me Grow – MN, a longtime supporting partner of Mom Enough.
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT SCREEN TIME AND YOUNG CHILDREN? The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends no screen time for babies before 18 months of age and only a small dose of high-quality material beyond that age. What concerns did this week’s Mom Enough guest raise about screen time in very early childhood? In what ways can parents mediate the effects of screen time to reduce harm and enhance learning? Based on what you learned in this discussion, what do you think you are doing well and what would you like to improve in terms of the way you and your family are using electronic devices?
WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ IMPORTANT TIPS TO MANAGE YOUR KIDS' SCREEN USE. Check out this resource from Mom Enough and Comcast to help your child make the most of the online world and screens, while also keeping them safe when they surf the web.
❉ THE IMPACT OF MEDIA ON CHILDREN’S BEHAVIOR & DEVELOPMENT. Douglas Gentile, psychology professor at Iowa State University and a leading researcher on children and the impact of media, joins Marti & Erin for an information-packed discussion every parent should hear. Take special note of the power of parents to prevent the negative effects of media!
❉ MONITORING AND MANAGING YOUR CHILD'S USE OF SCREENS. Mom Enough partnered with Comcast to let you know about new resources for monitoring and managing your children’s screen use. Learn more in this video.
These days an unprecedented number of both children and adults report feeling anxious and overwhelmed much of the time. Maybe you are one of them! Many of us find ourselves at the mercy of our smart phones, tablets and other devices, responding to every beep and ping as if our lives depended on it. We also may feel compelled to say yes to every invitation or request that comes our way. But then, when the time comes to follow through, we’d rather enjoy a long walk, spend some fun time with our loved ones or read a good book.
In the words of psychologist Dr. Anthony Rao (Tony), we have lost our “agency,’ the ability to make wise decisions and put those decisions into actions that are consistent with the life we want to live. We have lost the ability to be effective agents on our own behalf. And, in doing so, we are setting an example for our children to do the same. Tony joins Marti & Erin in this episode of Mom Enough to discuss highlights of the new book he has written with colleague Paul Napper, The Power of Agency: The Seven Principles to Conquer Obstacles, Make Effective Decisions, and Create a Life on Your Own Terms. In this lively discussion, Tony emphasizes the first three principles from his book: 1) Clear your mind by reducing stimuli; 2) Associate selectively; and 3) Move (or, as Tony says, “Use your body in more beautiful ways.”) He discusses how these foundational principles can be introduced to children of any age, setting the stage for both parent and child to increase their agency by moving on through all seven principles. Marti & Erin were inspired by Tony’s framework and practical tips and think you will be too.
WHAT WILL YOU DO WITH THE WISE ADVICE OF DR. RAO? What does the word "agency" mean to you? What would it look like if you increased your agency in the way you live your own life? Or helped your children do the same? Think of the first three principles Tony Rao discussed (clear your mind, affiliate selectively and move). What could you do this week to bring those principles to life for you and your children?
CHECK OUT THESE LINKS TO LEARN MORE ABOUT TOPICS RELATED TO AGENCY: ❉ ENGAGING CHILDREN AS GOOD CITIZENS: HELPING CHILDREN ENVISION THE WORLD THEY WANT AND TAKE ACTION TO REALIZE THAT VISION. Dr. Anne Klaeysen, head of the New York Society for Ethical Culture, offers clear and helpful ways to help our children discover their own values, learn what it means to be kind and fair on a large scale and recognize what they can contribute toward building a humane, ethical society, as children and throughout their lives.
❉ THE CHEMISTRY OF CALM AND JOY: A CONVERSATION WITH INTEGRATIVE PSYCHIATRIST HENRY EMMONS. Listen as Dr. Emmons discusses the chemistry of emotions and simple, accessible strategies to manage energy, quiet our minds, build resilience and maximize our experience of calm, joy and well-being.
❉ HOW TO HELP YOUR CHILDREN REFLECT ON EMOTIONS AND BEHAVIORAL CHOICES. Check out this brief clip from the 2017 Night Out For ME presentation.
Given the major national focus on making sure all young children are prepared to succeed in school and beyond, it might be tempting to sit kids down at desks with workbooks or flashcards. While those activities may sometimes have a place in early childhood education, child development experts know that young children learn best by moving, exploring, creating, and interacting with peers to make plans and solve problems.
Across the country, an exciting movement has been gaining momentum, working to get kids into outdoor learning environments designed to ignite their natural curiosity and allow them to explore, discover and imagine to their hearts’ content. Twin Cities-based Kinderberry Hill has joined this movement, adding carefully-designed outdoor classrooms to their centers and arranging training and consultation so teachers and young students can make the most of these natural learning environments.
In this Mom Enough episode, Lisa Swan and Sara Reichstadt from Kinderberry Hill join Marti & Erin to talk about the benefits of nature experience and outdoor learning and to share stories of what they have seen their students do in these outdoor classrooms. Knowing parents can support this vibrant approach to learning, Lisa and Sara also offer practical tips for how you can apply these same outdoor learning concepts at home or in your community.
WHAT HAVE YOU OBSERVED WHEN CHILDREN LEARN OUTDOORS? Have you had a chance to watch children in an outdoor classroom – or just watched groups of young children figuring out what to do in a natural environment? How do you think outdoor classrooms would benefit children in a preschool or elementary school? More broadly, to what extent do you think we should be concerned that children today spend much less time outdoors than earlier generations? Why?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT THE BENEFITS OF "OUTDOOR CLASSROOMS" AND SIMPLY BEING OUTSIDE? ❉ A NEW VISION FOR OUTDOOR PLAY: AN ADVENTURE PLAYGROUND CONVERSATION WITH AMY FUSSELMAN, AUTHOR OF “SAVAGE PARK”. When writer Amy Fusselman, her husband and young children had an opportunity for a long visit with a friend in Japan, they discovered a whole new kind of “adventure playground” that opened their eyes to a new of thinking about children’s safety, learning, creativity and competence. Listen to this episode with Marti & Erin to learn more!
❉ PRACTICAL IDEAS TO CONNECT CHILDREN AND NATURE: A CONVERSATION WITH AUTHOR RICHARD LOUV. In this episode of Mom Enough, San Diego journalist Richard Louv discusses his book Vitamin N and shares concrete strategies for families, schools, healthcare organizations and communities to connect children and nature.
Parental addiction has significant effects on children and the parent-child relationship, but there is hope and healing is possible. When a parent is addicted to alcohol or other drugs, their relationships with their children suffer, whatever the ages of the children. Given a chance, school-age children often describe working hard to keep their parent’s secret, trying to take care of their parent, and worrying that they can’t trust their parent to be there when they need them.
Even when children don’t use words to describe their experience, their anxiety and lack of trust often show up in sleep difficulties, regression in toileting, weight issues, aggression, difficulty focusing and poor relationships with teachers and peers. Although we sometimes may think that babies or toddlers are too young to know what parents are up to, a parent’s substance use can interfere in major ways with the development of a secure parent-infant attachment and important aspects of brain development in early childhood.
This week’s Mom Enough guests represent programs that are making a difference for parents and children of all ages, birth through adolescence. Helene Photias, national director of operations for the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation’s Children’s Program, and Paula Frisk, senior director of zero to five home visiting programs at St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development, join Marti & Erin to discuss keys to helping parents and children move toward healing, build more positive and secure relationships, and create the fun and joy that every child and parent deserves.
HAVE YOU OBSERVED THE EFFECTS OF PARENTAL ADDICTION ON PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIPS? What have you experienced or observed about parental substance use and its effects on parent-child relationships? Both programs discussed in this podcast focus on relationships. Why do you think that is important rather than just focusing separately on the child or the adult?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT ADDICTION & RECOVERY OR SUPPORT SERVICES FOR YOUR FAMILY?
❉ ST DAVID'S CENTER FOR CHILD & FAMILY DEVELOPMENT. Nurturing development through early childhood education, intervention and treatment for children with developmental needs, and life-phase services for individuals with enduring special needs.
❉ HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. The nation's largest nonprofit treatment provider, with 17 sites in California, Minnesota, Oregon, Illinois, New York, Florida, Massachusetts, Colorado and Washington. The Foundation offers prevention and recovery solutions nationwide and across the entire continuum of care for youth and adults.
❉ WOMEN, ADDICTION AND MENTAL HEALTH: INFORMATION AND PRACTICAL GUIDANCE FROM HAZELDEN BETTY FORD FOUNDATION. In this episode of Mom Enough, Dr. Wicks of Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation discusses unique challenges faced by women dealing with addiction and, more broadly, how to approach a loved one (male or female) you believe has a substance use problem.
❉ RECOGNIZING AND RESPONDING TO SIGNS OF A POSSIBLE SUBSTANCE ABUSE PROBLEM WITH YOUR ADOLESCENT: GUIDANCE FROM HAZELDEN BETTY FORD. Listen as Dr. Leslie Adair of Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation shares the information we need to recognize signs of possible addiction, to seek evaluation by an experienced professional and if needed, to get appropriate treatment and family support.
Adolescent sleep patterns represent a change from earlier childhood. Gone are the days of "early to bed and early to rise." Adolescents tend to stay up later and, if allowed, sleep in. The quantity and quality of sleep a person gets is important to health, safety and well-being at every age. But recent research highlights the unique sleep needs of adolescents and the high cost when those needs are not met – from poorer school performance to depression to greater risk of car accidents and more.
Kyla Wahlstrom, Senior Research Fellow at the University of Minnesota, has studied this issue for more than 20 years, including a recently completed 3-year study with the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. She joins Marti & Erin for a lively discussion of what parents can do to ensure adolescents get the sleep they need and to make the case for why later school start times are an important part of the equation.
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT ADOLESCENT SLEEP PATTERNS? What did you learn in this Mom Enough interview about how and why later school start times (after 8:30 am) are so important for adolescents? If your district has early start times and is not likely to change them, what steps can you and your family take to improve the amount and quality of your children’s sleep?
WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ START SCHOOL LATER. Check out this coalition of health professionals, sleep scientists, educators, parents, students and concerned citizens dedicated to increasing public awareness about the relationship between sleep and school hours.
❉ EVIDENCE ON THE IMPACT OF A LATER HIGH SCHOOL START TIME. Read this study to learn more about the evidence for later high school start times.
❉ IN SEARCH OF A GOOD NIGHT'S SLEEP: PRACTICAL TIPS FROM DR. HARVEY KARP. Listen to this Mom Enough episode with The Happiest Baby Guide to Great Sleep author, Dr. Harvey Karp.
❉ ARE YOU CONCERNED THAT YOUR CHILD MAY NOT BE GETTING ENOUGH SLEEP? Tune in to this show to learn more about the symptoms and management of sleep disorders from expert, Dr. Gerald Rosen.
Amazon Links are from the Associate Program. Mom Enough® may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. We only share links to products that we have personally reviewed and/or used. Your purchase helps Mom Enough continue to offer evidence-based information at no cost to our listeners.
We all have read the heartbreaking stories of young people’s lives destroyed by opioid addiction, and most of us probably have a family member or friend who has been touched by this insidious problem. But did you know that the U.S. consumes 80% of the opioids in the world (and 99% of hydrocodone), even though we make up only 4.4% of the world’s population? Although opioid prescriptions have dropped since their peak in 2012 (when 255 million prescriptions were written), recent data still show 191 million prescriptions being written per year. Among people abusing opioids, just over 30% get them by prescription, while about 50% get them from friends or relatives. (How many of you have unused opioids in your medicine cabinet after having them prescribed following surgery or a painful dental procedure? How accessible are they to your children or guests?)
So, what can we do as parents to protect the children and adults in our family and community from the dangers of opioids? Ahmed Eid, Addiction Program Manager at the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, brings answers that every parent should hear. Specifically, he addresses these questions and more: What safer options are there for managing pain when that is necessary? Where and how should we dispose of leftover opioids so they won’t fall into the wrong hands? What are the signs of opioid addiction in young people and how are they the same as or different from other types of addiction? (For example, unlike other substances that are more social, opioid use is isolating, leaving the user extremely irritable, experiencing intense itching, having slurred speech and a pattern of dozing off. Within 6 – 10 hours after the last use, intense withdrawal symptoms set in, including pain all over.) What is the most effective treatment approach and how is that the same or different than treatment for addiction to other substances? For example, what about the use of medication in treatment, as well as the more holistic approach typically used to treat other addictions? And perhaps most important of all, how can we talk with our children about opioid use in a way that will keep them from starting down that path?
Ahmed notes that talking with our children from an early age is one of the most important things we can do, telling them clearly how miserable the experience of opioid addiction is and how all-consuming the craving becomes. We urge you to listen carefully to this important and informative Mom Enough discussion so that you are better prepared to keep your children and other loved ones safe.
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT OPIOID USE AND ABUSE? What surprised you in this discussion about opioid addiction? Why do you think the U.S. is accountable for such a high proportion of opioid use in the world? What could we do as a society to address those larger forces that have set the stage for such a high incidence of opioid addiction and related deaths? On a more personal level, what can you say and do in your own home or neighborhood to reduce the likelihood that young people will abuse opioids?
WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ FROM ARAB SPRING TO A UNIQUELY AMERICAN SCOURGE. Read this Star Tribune article about Ahmed Eid's journey from Egypt, where he worked as a counselor in a psychiatric hospital, to Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, where he working hard to treat and prevent opioid addiction.
❉ SESAME STREET INTRODUCES NEW CHARACTER TO HELP KIDS UNDERSTAND THE OPIOID CRISIS. Sesame Street creators turned to the issue of addiction since data shows 5.7 million children under the age of 11 live in households with a parent with substance use disorder. Learn more in this video.
❉ RECOGNIZING AND RESPONDING TO SIGNS OF A POSSIBLE SUBSTANCE ABUSE PROBLEM WITH YOUR ADOLESCENT: GUIDANCE FROM HAZELDEN BETTY FORD. Dr. Leslie Adair, from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, shares the information parents need to recognize signs of possible addiction and how to get appropriate treatment...
We’ve all seen them (and many of us have been them) – the sports parents yelling at the referee, coaching their child from the sidelines or booing the other team. What are kids learning when they see that behavior? And how does that parental behavior affect children’s health, well-being and feelings about sports?
University of Minnesota researcher Dr. Nicole LaVoi has spent years seeking answers to these questions. And she has helped many communities move toward more positive attitudes and behavior to support children’s development as athletes and people of character. In this Mom Enough episode, Marti & Erin were taking Nicole’s well-tested advice to heart, and you will too!
DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELVES GOOD SPORTS PARENTS? How would you describe your own behavior at your children’s sports events? Based on what Dr. La Voi discussed in this Mom Enough interview, what are you doing well and what could you improve?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT POSITIVELY SUPPORTING YOUR CHILD'S ATHLETIC ENDEAVORS? ❉ THE BENEFITS OF SPORTS FOR CHILDREN: WISDOM ON BEING THE BEST SPORTS PARENT YOU CAN BE FROM COACH AND PSYCHOLOGY PROFESSOR JOHN TAUER. Listen to this episode to learn more from coach, psychology professor, and author of Why Less Is More for WOSPS: How to Be the Best Sports Parent You Can Be. (Click book image to purchase through our affiliate link.)
❉ HAVE YOU EVER HAD THE URGE TO SLIP OUT OF YOUR CHILD’S SPORTS EVENT AND GO DO WHAT YOU WANT? Listen to self-described “Bad Hockey Mom" and author, Karlyn Coleman, as she discusses what it really means to be "mom enough" with Drs. Marti & Erin Erickson.
❉ HOW CAN YOU HELP YOUR CHILD GET THE MOST OUT OF PARTICIPATING IN SPORTS? AND WHAT ARE THE PITFALLS TO AVOID? Listen to this oldie, but goodie, Mom Enough episode with child development professor and longtime advisor to student-athletes, Dr. Richard Weinberg, who shares the dos and don’ts of nurturing your child’s athletic talents and interests.
❉ CHANGING THE GAME: THE PARENT'S GUIDE TO RAISING HAPPY, HIGH PERFORMING ATHLETES, AND GIVING YOUTH SPORTS BACK TO OUR KIDS. Check out this book to learn more about being good sports parents. (Click book image to purchase through our affiliate link.)
Amazon Links are from the Associate Program. Mom Enough® may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. We only share links to products that we have personally reviewed and/or used. Your purchase helps Mom Enough continue to offer evidence-based information at no cost to our listeners.
Many of us are uncomfortable talking candidly with our children and teens about sex, perhaps hoping sex education programs at school will do the job. And yet, research shows that, as parents, we often overestimate what our children learn at school. And we underestimate the impact we will have on our children’s attitudes and behaviors if we muster the courage and confidence to talk openly about this important aspect of human development.
Author Janet Rosenzweig, Executive Director of the American Professional Society on the Abuse of Children and a longtime sex educator and author, joins Marti & Erin to talk about what it means to speak comfortably and accurately about sex with children and teens. For example, she emphasizes the importance of teaching children about sexual arousal as an autonomic (involuntary) response that has nothing to do with thought or reason – a critical element in discerning between arousal and love. And she highlights that, when parents take responsibility as primary sex educators for their children, they have the opportunity to wrap those messages in their family’s values. Above all, Dr. Rosenzweig makes a strong case for arming our children with detailed, accurate information about the natural sexual responses humans experience, which in turn will empower our children to make healthy, safe choices now and later.
HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT TALKING WITH YOUR CHILDREN ABOUT SEX? How did your parents or other adults talk to you about sex? How helpful were those conversations in terms of your understanding of your own sexual arousal and the choices you made about sexual behavior? In what ways do you want to do things the same or differently as you try to prepare your children for making safe, healthy sexual decisions?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT TALKING WITH CHILDREN ABOUT SEX? ❉ THE SEX-WISE PARENT & THE PARENT'S GUIDE TO TALKING ABOUT SEX. Check out these great books from this week's guest, Dr. Janet Rosenzweig. Or better yet, purchase them here (click book image to purchase through our affiliate link):
❉ TEACHING OUR CHILDREN ABOUT SEX, LOVE AND EQUALITY: A CONVERSATION ABOUT SEX EDUCATION. Listen to this episode of Mom Enough with Bonnie Rough, author of Beyond Birds & Bees: Bringing Home a New Message to Our Kids about Sex, Love and Equality.
❉ ERIN'S RECOMMENDED BOOKS ABOUT SEX FOR KIDS:
For 4 years old and up (click book image to purchase through our affiliate link):
For 7 years old and up (click book image to purchase through our affiliate link):
Mom Enough® only shares recommendations for products or books we have independently reviewed. As an Amazon Associate, Mom Enough may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you. Your purchase helps Mom Enough continue to offer evidence-based information at no cost to our listeners.
Do you struggle to help your child learn math? As parents, many of us are at a loss to help our children and teens when they get stuck on a math problem. Not only have we forgotten many of the skills we don’t use regularly, but we quickly discover that our children are learning different ways of doing math than we were taught – so much so that our efforts to help may confuse our children further.
This week’s Mom Enough guest, Kreg Moccia, experienced teacher, dean and now leader of academic development for the Yup math tutoring app, sees a way past these challenges. In his conversation with Marti & Erin, Kreg provides a useful framework for thinking about how to help our children build the skills, good sense and confidence to succeed in math. Drawing on Carol Dweck’s concept of “growth mindset,” Kreg explains how that concept can help our children and teens develop new habits in approaching challenging math tasks. Kreg also introduces the innovative math tutoring app called Yup, which makes it possible for students in grades 3 – 12 to get instant, 24/7 guidance from online tutors trained and monitored in using the “growth mindset” concept. This evidence-based teaching approach (backed by Stanford University) helps students understand math concepts and vocabulary, figure out what they are doing right, identify past successes on which they can build, check their work carefully and use “sense-checking” to determine if their answers make sense. As a long-time educator, Marti applauds Yup’s careful approach to ensuring quality of teaching. And, after trying the app to help them through some challenging math problems, Erin’s teenage kids give a heartfelt endorsement to Yup as a way to deepen their learning and build their confidence. Mom Enough is delighted to have Yup as a supporting partner.
DOES YOUR CHILD'S MATH HOMEWORK STRAIN YOUR BRAIN? What has been your experience in trying to help your kids when they have trouble with math homework? What did you hear in this Mom Enough discussion that could help you next time your kids are struggling? What do you think of a math tutoring app to help your kids when they are stuck?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT HOW TO HELP YOUR CHILD WITH MATH?
❉ CHECK OUT THE YUP TUTORING APP. Erin's kids love how easy it is for them to get help whenever they need it - 24/7. Learn how this app might help your children learn math.
❉ 3 WAYS TO EXPLAIN THE IMPORTANCE OF MATH TO YOUR CHILDREN. Read this helpful information from Mom Enough's newest supporting partner, Yup.
❉ PROMOTING YOUR CHILD’S MATH SKILLS AND CONFIDENCE: PUTTING MATH IN A POSITIVE LIGHT. University of Minnesota professor, Michele Mazzocco, joins Marti & Erin for an encouraging and interesting discussion of how to help your children discover that math is fun, doable and relevant to everyday life in this episode of Mom Enough.
❉ INSPIRING YOUR CHILDREN TO LOVE MATH: A CONVERSATION WITH PROFESSOR LESA CLARKSON FROM THE U OF M’S COLLEGE OF EDUCATION AND HUMAN DEVELOPMENT. Lesa Clarkson describes fun and interesting activities we can do with our kids at every age to get them excited about math in everyday life and possibly inspire them to love math!
Would you like to find more calm and joy in your life? As parents, many of us often find ourselves in reactive mode, letting stress, frustration, anger or disappointment overwhelm us. For some of us, those feelings reach the level of clinical depression or an anxiety disorder. Dr. Henry Emmons has spent his career helping people understand and apply the chemistry of emotions, using simple, accessible strategies to manage energy, quiet our minds, build resilience and maximize our experience of calm, joy and well-being. Learn with Marti & Erin in this helpful, inspiring discussion!
DO YOU LONG FOR MORE CALM, JOYFUL MOMENTS IN YOUR LIFE? What ideas did you take away from this Mom Enough discussion with psychiatrist Henry Emmons? Think of a recent situation in which you felt like negative emotions were taking over. Next time a similar situation arises, what steps could you take to handle it differently?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT HOW TO INCORPORATE CALM AND JOY IN YOUR LIFE?
❉ MAINTAINING YOUR MENTAL HEALTH - FOR YOUR SAKE AND YOUR CHILDREN'S. Practical steps parents can take to maintain their mental health and well-being.
❉ MENTAL HEALTH, A FAMILY AFFAIR: HOW MANAGING YOUR OWN STRESS AND EMOTIONS SUPPORTS YOUR CHILD'S HEALTH AND WELL BEING. Listen to a past show with one of Mom Enough's supporting partners, St. David's Center for Child & Family Development for strategies we can use to reduce our stress and manage our feelings.
❉ NATURAL MENTAL HEALTH. For more resources to encourage optimal mental health, check out this website that was co-founded by Dr. Henry Emmons.
Family mealtime and the conversation that goes along with it provide longterm benefits for children and teens. These include better physical health, stronger parent-child relationships, better school performance, lower risk of substance abuse, better vocabulary, and greater resilience. But many families struggle to get everyone at the table at the same time, let alone prepare a healthy meal or have a meaningful or entertaining conversation. Busy schedules, both for parents and kids, are one major obstacle to family mealtime, but families also cite picky eaters and the distractions of devices as challenges.
The Family Dinner Project, a nonprofit initiative based in Boston, has been helping families overcome those obstacles for ten years, helping families find fun and laughter at the same time. They recently released Eat, Laugh,Talk: The Family Dinner Playbook, a cookbook (and much more!) that has Marti & Erin excited to use it with their family. Dr. Anne Fishel, Executive Director of The Family Dinner Project, joins Marti & Erin to explore creative ways families can schedule family mealtime and make it interesting and fun. In addition to directing this nonprofit, Anne also is an Associate Clinical Professor in the Harvard Medical School and Director of the Family and Couple Therapy Program at Massachusetts General Hospital. Reflecting on that experience, Anne affirms the value of family mealtime, saying with a laugh, “If more families had family dinner, I think I’d be out of business as a family therapist.”
DO YOU LONG FOR FAMILY MEALTIME & CONVERSATION THAT GO BEYOND FROZEN PIZZA AND "HOW WAS YOUR DAY?" What things help or hinder you from having family mealtimes on a regular basis? What ideas did you hear in this Mom Enough discussion that might help you increase the frequency of family mealtime in your household? What conversation starters or games sounded like they might be fun to try with your family?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT FAMILY MEALTIME?
❉ THE BENEFITS OF FAMILY MEALS AND HOW TO MAKE THEM HAPPEN. Erin shares in her blog post for Natural Mental Health, 5 strategies for making family meals happen.
❉ HOW TO KEEP FOOD FUN. Check out these ideas to help you keep your child excited about new foods.
❉ HEALTHY EATING FOR PARENTS AND KIDS. Read these tips for some healthy diet ideas for your whole family.
It can be easy to slip into an unhealthy pattern of using alcohol to cope with holiday stress. Did you know that an increasing number of women are misusing alcohol today? And when women drink, they are at greater risk of addiction than men and less likely to seek help. The holidays create extra stress for women, who typically bear the greatest responsibility for holiday preparations. With high expectations to match the perfect images on holiday cards or posed Instagram posts, women often feel they aren’t measuring up. Add to that an emphasis on alcohol at holiday festivities and over-drinking, or a relapse in maintaining already-established sobriety, are risks.
This week’s Mom Enough guest, Kim Albers, understands these challenges well. Director of Recovery Management at Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, Kim understands the particular vulnerability of women to addiction and the stigma and social expectations that keep women (especially moms) from seeking treatment when they need it. With empathy and respect, Kim acknowledges the shame many women feel around their drinking. Most important, Kim knows the critical role of self-care and emotional support in helping women drink reasonably or, for those in recovery, protect their sobriety. She joins Marti & Erin for a detailed and helpful discussion of all of these issues. She also provides very clear information on how to know if your drinking is problematic and where to turn to get help tailored to your specific needs and strengths.
HAVE YOU USED ALCOHOL TO COPE WITH HOLIDAY STRESS? Can you think of a time when you (or someone you love) has gotten caught up in celebrating and had too much to drink? How did you (or your loved one) feel the next day, both physically and emotionally? What tips could help you and your loved ones avoid overdrinking during the holidays? If you or someone you love frequently engage in overdrinking, where can you turn first to find out if you need professional help?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT AVOIDING ALCOHOL AND DEVELOPING HEALTHY COPING STRATEGIES FOR ADDRESSING HOLIDAY STRESS?
❉ DO YOU FEEL YOUR STRESS BUILDING AS THE HOLIDAYS APPROACH? Listen to this episode with researcher Dr. Anna Kudak, who has spent years interviewing women about their holiday experiences. Learn how to ease up a bit and create meaning this holiday season.
❉ REDUCING HOLIDAY STRESS. Check out this tip sheet to learn ways to reduce your stress this holiday.
❉ WOMEN AND ALCOHOL: A CONVERSATION ABOUT WOMEN’S RISK OF ALCOHOL-RELATED PROBLEMS. If you want to learn more about women alcohol, listen to this podcast with Jill Seward of Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.
❉ DO YOU EVER WONDER IF YOUR ALCOHOL OR DRUG USE IS BECOMING A PROBLEM? Take the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation Online Drug and Alcohol Addiction Test.
Want to learn more about preventing obesity in children and teens using a family-focused approach? Dr. Daheia Barr-Anderson has spent her career trying to untangle the individual, family and community factors that contribute to overweight and obesity in children and adolescents. An assistant professor in the U of M’s Department of Kinesiology, Daheia has put that research into practice in family-focused interventions, including an innovative mother-daughter intervention with African-American girls and their moms.
Tune into Daheia’s interesting and informative conversation with Marti & Erin to learn what matters most and to think about how small changes can lead to big differences in the health of your children and you!
WHAT WILL YOU DO TO PREVENT CHILDHOOD OBESITY? Think about your own family’s patterns of eating and physical activity. What aspects of your lifestyle, your relationships and your neighborhood support or hinder you and your children from maintaining a healthy weight? What small steps could you take to bring about healthy change?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT PREVENTING OBESITY IN CHILDREN AND TEENS? CHECK OUT THESE GREAT RESOURCES: ❉ COULD YOUR CHILD BE HEADING TOWARD OBESITY? A pediatrician from Children’s Hospitals and Clinics of Minnesota helps us understand how the choices you make can keep your child on the path to health.
❉ THE BENEFITS OF FAMILY MEALS & FIVE TIPS TO MAKE THEM HAPPEN. After your hard work in the kitchen, are your children done eating within five minutes of the food hitting the table and begging to leave? If you can relate, know that you’re not alone. Check out this article on the benefits of family meals and how to make them happen.
❉ WHAT ARE THE THINGS THAT GET IN THE WAY OF MAKING HEALTHY CHOICES FOR YOUR CHILDREN – AND TEACHING THEM TO DO THE SAME? A specialist in pediatric nutrition offers simple tips that can lead to meaningful change in your child’s health and fitness.
Want to learn about raising smarter kids? This week’s Mom Enough guest, Dr. Joanne Foster, is an award-winning author and expert in gifted education and child development. She joined Marti and Erin to share some of the ideas in her latest book, The ABCs of Raising Smarter Kids: Hundreds of Ways to Inspire Your Child.
Taking the concept of an “alphabet book” to a new level, Joanne gives examples of the practical tips she developed around each letter of the alphabet. But Marti & Erin had a special interest in another favorite topic of Joanne’s (and the subject of one of her previous books), helping kids overcome procrastination. They appreciated her good advice on assessing why a child puts off a task. For example, are they bored, lacking confidence, distracted, lacking skills, overloaded with work? Hmm, those questions can be useful with adults too!
WHAT WILL YOU DO TO SUPPORT YOUR CHILD'S LEARNING? What did you hear in this podcast that helped you think differently about supporting your child’s learning or work habits? In what areas do you think your child (or children) would benefit from some special support and inspiration from you?
WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT SUPPORTING YOUR CHILD'S LEARNING? CHECK OUT THESE GREAT RESOURCES: ❉ SMART, BUT SCATTERED: HELPING CHILDREN AND TEENS BUILD EXECUTIVE SKILLS TO SUCCEED IN SCHOOL AND LIFE. Dr. Peg Dawson discusses ways to build executive skills, such as staying focused and developing a plan for completing tasks and getting organized, in this Mom Enough podcast.
❉ CREATING A HOME ENVIRONMENT THAT PROMOTES SCHOOL SUCCESS. Dr. Marti Erickson shares suggestions on creating a learning environment at home in this tip sheet.
❉ FAMILY-SCHOOL PARTNERSHIPS: THE KEYS TO SCHOOL SUCCESS. Learn important ways parents can support their child's learning in this helpful tip sheet.
Want to learn more about how to help your child make friends? At every age, children vary greatly in how they make friends, keep friends and handle challenges such as conflict, bullying, rejection or bad influence. So, to what extent can effective, positive social skills be taught? And what is the appropriate role of parents in helping children build these important life skills? Camie Christensen, former Program Director at St. David’s Center for Child and Family Development, brings wisdom and practical strategies to this week’s lively and heartfelt discussion of how to help your child make friends and be a friend.
HOW WILL YOU HELP YOUR CHILD MAKE FRIENDS? How does your child usually approach other children when meeting them for the first time? What challenges has your child faced in getting along with peers? What ideas did you hear in this Mom Enough discussion about how you might help your child strengthen his or her social skills?
WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ GIRLS & AGGRESSION: POSSIBLE CAUSES, CONSEQUENCES AND TIPS FOR PREVENTION. Watch Dr. Marti Erickson with KARE 11 News’ Ellery McCardle discuss 5 tips on what parents, educators and other caring adults can do to prevent relational aggression.
❉ HELPING OUR CHILDREN BUILD SELF-COMPASSION: KEYS TO KINDNESS, GRATITUDE AND COMPASSION FOR OTHERS. Dr. Shilagh Mirgain, a health and sport psychologist at the University of Wisconsin, discusses how to help your children develop compassion for themselves and others, recognizing the common humanity, vulnerability and imperfection we all share.
❉ FRESH PERSPECTIVES ON BULLYING: A “STICKS AND STONES” CONVERSATION WITH AUTHOR EMILY BAZELON. Discover what we should do to support a deeper understanding of – and more effective response to – bullying in this podcast with author Emily Bazelon, Senior Editor of Slate and frequent guest on Comedy Central’s The Colbert Report.
Mom Enough co-hosts Marti & Erin found this discussion on raising boys with Dr. Michael Reichert to be one of the most thoughtful and important episodes they have done. Drawing on his personal story of the death of his brother, his extensive research on boys around the world and his years of clinical experience with boys longing to be heard, this psychologist and highly respected author makes the case that, in his words, “Too many boys lose their intimate connections and emotional voices early in their lives.” But it doesn’t have to be that way, and Dr. Reichert offers practical guidance whether you are the parent of a lively preschooler, a 5th-grader trying to succeed in school or a teenager trying to navigate the turbulent waters of romance and sexuality or grappling with disturbing pornographic images on the internet.
BOYS AND GIRLS ARE NOT AS DIFFERENT AS WE SOMETIMES THINK.
If you listen carefully, you are likely to discover that boys and girls are not as different as we sometimes think. We all long for trust, respect, connection. We all long for our needs and feelings to be heard and acknowledged. And when we provide those things to both our sons and daughters, the world will be better for the men and women they become.
REFLECT ON HOW YOU WILL BEGIN RAISING BOYS DIFFERENTLY.
This week’s Mom Enough guest, Dr. Michael Reichert, says in this discussion, “The problem is not boys, but the boyhood we have built.” What examples can you think of that illustrate this point? What concrete steps could you take to begin to build a better boyhood for the boys in your life, whatever their ages? What one thing will you change in how you are raising your son(s), so they will grow up to be compassionate and caring adults?
WANT TO LEARN MORE? ❉ Check out Dr. Reichert's book, How to Raise a Boy: The Power of Connection to Build Good Men, to learn more about raising boys.
❉ Helping Our Children Build Self-Compassion: Keys to Kindness, Gratitude and Compassion for Others, click here.
❉ Cut to the Quick: The Consequences of Relational Aggression Among Our Sons & Daughters, click here.
Choosing childcare for our precious little ones is a tough decision for any parent. What type of setting will be the best match for your child’s personality and needs? How can you judge the quality of care, whether it’s home-based or center-based? Is there flexibility to accommodate your work schedule? And what kind of financial assistance is available if you need help paying?
This week’s Mom Enough guest, Jen Goinz, is the Childcare Information Manager for Child Care Aware Minnesota and she definitely has information you need, whether you live in Minnesota or elsewhere. Marti & Erin are grateful to longtime Mom Enough supporting partner, Help Me Grow for engaging Jen to represent them in this practical, helpful episode of Mom Enough.
What are the most important considerations to you in choosing care for your young child? What resources did you learn about in this Mom Enough discussion? Visit some of those resources and see what information is most helpful to you.
Related Resources:
For Assessing Quality Parent Checklist from Parent Aware, click here.
For Childcare resources in your state, click here.
To visit the Childcare Aware of America website, click here.
For the Parent Aware website and to find childcare near you, click here.
In 2005, author Richard Louv published a groundbreaking book, Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature Deficit Disorder. That book resonated with people around the world, inspired what has been called “the new nature movement” and led to the founding of the Children & Nature Network, an international nonprofit linking children of all ages to nature and spurring research to documents the impact of nature experience on children’s health, learning and well-being.
Now, after four years of research, Rich has released his most recent book, Our Wild Calling: How Connecting with Animals Can Transform Our Lives – and Save Theirs. This book digs deeply into the importance of our connections to other species, from household pets, service animals, and horses to the bees in our gardens and the bears we may encounter in the woods and mountains. Tune in as Rich joins Marti & Erin, his good friends and fellow children and nature advocates, for a quiet, reflective glimpse into this just-released book. We suggest you find a quiet place outdoors -- or by a window with a view of nature – to listen to Rich Louv’s stories and insights and to reflect on what animals bring to your life and your children’s.
What have your own experiences with animals been over the course of your life? Think about pets and also animals in the wild. What have you learned from those experiences? What have those experiences meant to you? What opportunities do your children have to develop those connections with animals, and how do you support those connections?
Related Resources:
To listen to the Practical Ideas to Connect Children and Nature podcast with Richard Louv, click here.
To listen to Marti interview Richard Louv on MPR, click here.
For Our Wild Calling book, click here.
To read Animals Are Messengers In Richard Louv's Latest, click here.
To read Connect your Grandkids to Nature, click here.
To read Animals Are the Cure for Loneliness, click here.
Do you ever think about the core values and nuggets of wisdom you want your children to hold on to forever? Lisa Shumate did, and as she saw her two children move into adulthood, she put those nuggets into a book, Always and Never: Twenty Truths for a Happy Heart, and a companion journal by the same name to engage readers in reflecting on how those truths show up in their lives.
As General Manager of Houston Public Media, Executive Director of the Houston Public Media Foundation and Associate Vice President of the University of Houston, Lisa brings years of leadership and mentoring of other leaders to this week's discussion with Marti & Erin. She emphasizes the power of trust, love and forgiveness. And she challenges us to remember that we are in charge of our own minds and need to think about how we feed our minds (preferably not a diet of 11 hours per day of screen time!). Marti & Erin especially appreciated Lisa's positive view that perfection is not possible and a mistake is a learning opportunity.
Did your parents teach you any big truths that still guide your life? Did they teach through words or actions or both? What truths do you want to instill in your children and what steps can you take to do that?
Related Resources:
For the book, Always and Never: 20 Truths to a Happy Heart, click here.
For Lisa Shumate's blog, click here.
Sufficient high-quality sleep is key to health and well-being at every age. Yet many parents are chronically sleep-deprived, with women three times more likely than men to struggle with insomnia. Consequences include difficulty with mood regulation, memory, learning, weight gain and other health problems. Too often the strategies we use to try to relax and wind down before bed (a glass of wine, binge-watching a favorite TV show, chatting on social media) end up exacerbating sleep difficulties. But there are simple steps we can take right now to begin to establish patterns that will allow us to get the quality sleep we need and, in turn, ensure that our children do the same.
Dr. Shelby Harris, psychologist and author of The Women’s Guide to Overcoming Insomnia, brings a wealth of concrete, research-based strategies to her discussion with Marti & Erin in this Mom Enough episode. Beyond these ways to build good sleep patterns at home, Dr. Harris also emphasizes that, even if you have a clinical level of insomnia that requires professional help, the first line of treatment probably should not be medication. Cognitive behavioral therapy has been shown to be highly effective and safe and should be tried first. Don’t miss this important and informative discussion about an issue that disrupts so many lives.
How are you and your family doing when it comes to sleep? What new things did you learn in this interview with Dr. Shelby Harris? What steps could you take to improve your family’s patterns around bedtime and healthy sleep?
Related Resources:
For The Women's Guide to Overcoming Insomnia, click here.
Children with ASD often become dysregulated, both physically and emotionally, when they feel overstimulated by things like noise, clutter or demands to move too quickly from one activity to another. But, because each child is unique, parents need to be detectives, figuring out what will help their child become regulated and able to focus on what is important.
As occupational therapist Kate Biederman describes in this Mom Enough episode, some children respond well to deep touch, while others find that aversive. Many children feel calm after they engage in what Kate calls "heavy work," which includes climbing on a jungle gym or jumping on a mini-trampoline. While noise can be dysregulating, music with certain rhythms can be regulating and organizing. An uncluttered home environment and an unhurried schedule can help almost any child be calmer and more focused. As adults and children discover together what works, children ideally can build the self-awareness and independence to do what's necessary when they begin to feel dysregulated. As Marti & Erin attest, it's not only people with ASD who need to develop self-awareness and effective regulation. In our busy, noisy, fast-paced lives, these skills matter to all of us!
Reflect on the last few days and times when you or one of your children became dysregulated (feeling agitated, unfocused, not sure what to do next). What led to that? What strategies did you use to reestablish regulation and focus? How did that work? What else could you try next time?
Related Resources:
For our show on What Parents Can Do to Support Optimal Development of a Child with ASD, click here.
For a list of autism book & website resources, click here.
For information on the Greenspan Floortime Conference, click here.
To learn more about Autism Support Services at St. David’s Center, click here.
If you are like many moms, you probably have a story you tell yourself about what a “good mom” does. And trying to live up to that story probably leaves you feeling unfulfilled and unproductive at the end of most days, asking yourself, “How can I be so busy and have so little to show for it?” Perhaps you need to live more by doing less and find the joy of missing out!
Tonya Dalton, author and productivity expert, cuts to the chase on these issues in her book The Joy of Missing Out and in her conversation with Marti and Erin, offering practical tips on how to find your purpose (your North star!), clarify your priorities and simplify your life. Here key take-aways include Erin’s favorite, “Every time you say yes, you are saying no to something else,” and Marti’s mantra, “To be truly productive, we need to give our brains a little space to play and explore.” Listen to this lively conversation and then reflect on what you can choose to miss out on so you can savor those things that are truly important to you. You will benefit and so will your children.
Thinking about the past couple of weeks, what things did you do that led you to ask, “Why did I say yes to this? How is this consistent with my values and purpose?” When you said yes to those activities, what were you saying no to? (For example, fun time with your children, maintaining your own health, getting enough sleep, taking steps toward an important goal.) What do you resolve to do differently in the next couple of weeks?
Related Resources:
Why “ME Time” Matters podcast with Marti and Erin, click here.
For The Joy of Missing Out book, click here.
As parents, our days are filled with little challenges -- making sure our kids get out the door on time for school, getting siblings to play well together, helping a toddler accept “no” without a tantrum, persuading teens to get off the phone and do their homework. Dr. Alan Kazdin, professor and director of the Parenting Center at Yale, has spent his career helping parents whose children are especially defiant and challenging. But his latest book, The Everyday Parenting Toolkit, brings his proven methods to bear on the challenges all children and parents face. He joined Marti & Erin in this week’s show for a lively discussion, offering a positive parenting framework you will want to try with your own children.
In this week’s Mom Enough show, Dr. Alan Kazdin from Yale University, discusses his ABC approach to handling parenting challenges (A for antecedents, B for behavior, C for consequences). What challenging behaviors would you like to change with your child? What steps could you take to apply Dr. Kazdin’s method, starting with small changes and moving toward the bigger goals.
Related Resources:
For Parenting that Works from the American Psychological Association, click here.
For the principles and techniques of behavior change, click here.
Best-selling author Paul Tough digs deeply into big ideas, and that certainly is true in his latest book, The Years that Matter Most: How College Makes or Breaks Us. Paul spent six years exploring colleges in 21 states, including sitting through freshman calculus at the University of Texas and a philosophy class at Princeton. He interviewed faculty, SAT tutors and students from all walks of life, concluding that higher education as an engine of social mobility is breaking down.
Paul brings these issues to life through the chronicles of first-generation students trying to overcome barriers to admission to prestigious schools, community college students hoping to attain jobs that will pay the bills, and well-to-do students seeing their teen years defined by the anxiety that comes with intense parental pressure, high-stakes tests and frenetic schedules of résumé-building activities. He joins Marti & Erin this week to discuss highlights of what he learned and to offer action steps for college admissions, alumni, and public officials who make decisions on higher education funding.
What was your own path with regard to higher education and how did that work for you? How is that likely to be the same or different for your children? What ideas do you have for making good higher education attainable for the millions of young people who need it?
Related Resources:
To learn more about Paul Tough, click here.
How College Makes or Breaks Us Book Tour: To find out when Paul is in a city near you, click here.
To listen to How Children Succeed podcast with Paul Tough, click here.
To listen to Environments and Experiences that Promote Grit, Character and Success podcast with Paul Tough, click here.
Before you became a parent, how did you envision the way you and your partner would handle parenting responsibilities and household management tasks to form an equal partnership? To what extent does the actual division of labor match your vision or expectations? If you’re like most families, there is a notable gap between expectations and reality, and that may be fine with you – or not!
Clinical psychologist and author Darcy Lockman, motivated in part by personal experience, has delved deeply into this topic and brings what she has learned to this fascinating and important conversation with Marti & Erin. She explores assumptions about hormones and of parenting, cultural trends in intensive mothering, peaks and plateaus in active fathering and the often invisible work of the “mental load” of parenting. Most of all, Darcy urges couples to talk together about how they want to parent, especially before becoming parents. But, as Marti & Erin note, if you didn’t start then, start now!
Make time to reflect (alone and/or with your partner) on how you share the responsibilities of parenting, both the visible and invisible tasks this week’s guest talked about. How do you feel about the equality of how the work is being done? How do you handle those feelings? What would you want to change and how could you begin with small steps, showing respect and sensitivity to your partner’s perceptions and feelings?
Related Resources:
All The Rage: Mothers, Fathers, and the Myth of Equal Partnership, click here.
Too often, Working Mothers Do Far More of the Childcare Than Their Husbands article by Darcy Lockman for TIME, click here.
Don’t Be Grateful That Dad Does His Share article by Darcy Lockman for The Atlantic, click here.
Dads Matter: The Role of the Father in Child Development and What Moms Can do to Help Dads Succeed podcast, click here.
You probably remember the challenges of your own adolescence – on-again, off-again friendships, emotional highs and lows, worries about body image, anxiety about school, life and love. In today’s fast-paced world – and with both the opportunities and threats of ever-present technology – the stakes seem even higher for our daughters.
In her book Untangled, psychologist Lisa Damour, mom of two daughters and Director of Laurel School’s Center for Research on Girls, provides a rich framework for understanding the transitions teen girls face on the path to adulthood. Don’t miss her wisdom and practical guidance in this Mom Enough interview!
What are some of the major challenges your adolescent daughter confronts today? How do these issues tie to the seven transitions Lisa Damour described in this Mom Enough discussion? How have you tried to guide your daughter through these challenges and how might you improve your response?
Related Resources:
For Untangled, click here.
For a discussion guide for Untangled, click here.
Being smart is one ingredient for school success. But, without the ability to stay focused, develop a realistic plan for completing tasks and organizing yourself and your stuff, being smart may not get you very far.
It is those “executive skills” that are the focus of Dr. Peg Dawson’s work, particularly with children and teens who struggle with attention problems. Peg also is co-author of three books on the subject, dealing separately with children, teens and adults who are Smart, but Scattered. Tune in for practical ways to help kids build executive skills, as well as some true confessions from Marti & Erin about their “smart, but scattered” family members!
How do your children and other family members (including yourself) measure up on the executive skills discussed in this Mom Enough interview? How do you put into practice Dr. Dawson’s tips (e.g. breaking down tasks, establishing routines, creating clean spaces and using incentives)? What could you do better?
Related Resources:
Creating a Home Environment that Promotes School Success tip sheet by Dr. Marti Erickson, click here.
To learn more about Dr. Peg Dawson's books, click here.
For the Smart but Scattered blog, click here.
Whether it’s news accounts of natural disasters or terrorism, sexually loaded images on TV or marital conflict in our own homes, many things in our children’s daily lives compel us to have conversations that feel difficult and uncomfortable. What can children manage or comprehend at different ages? What words should we use – and what tone should we strive for – when children ask questions that make us squirm? How do we help children feel safe and secure while still being honest about the hard things that can and do happen in the real world?
Psychologist Kate Rickord from St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development joins Marti for a thoughtful conversation about addressing tough topics with your children, whatever their ages.
*Encore show, originally posted 7/11/16
What topics do you find most uncomfortable to discuss with your children? What did you find helpful in this Mom Enough discussion?
Related Resources:
For St. David’s Center, click here.
For St. David’s Center’s Mental Health Services, click here
When a parent or other key adult in a family is dealing with substance abuse or addiction, children are affected in many ways. Their trust and security are undermined when parents are unable to provide the consistent, sensitive care children need and deserve. Children may fear the erratic, unpredictable behavior that is typical of people with substance abuse issues. Often, children cope by taking on the unspoken rules of “don’t talk, don’t trust, don’t feel,” at great expense to their health and wellbeing.
But, as this week’s guest, Helene Photias, knows, children begin to heal when adults talk to them candidly and in developmentally appropriate ways about what their problem is, why they are going to treatment and what they expect to learn there. Children also thrive when they are supported and encouraged to say how they feel and to learn that it is safe to break the rules of silence and tell the adults around them what they need. This is a rich and important conversation you won’t want to miss.
Is there someone in your family or close circle of friends who is struggling with substance use? What you noticed about the impact on children in the family? What specific points or suggestions in this Mom Enough discussion could help you or others in your circle support the resilience of children who are affected?
Related Resource:
To listen to When a Child Grows Up with Addiction podcast with Helene Photias, click here.
For the National Association for Children of Alcoholics, click here.
Long before children can speak and tell us what they know, they are watching us and others and beginning to develop expectations about how people will behave in certain situations. For example, infants who have a secure attachment with their mothers show surprise when a very simple animated video image leaves a smaller, similar image who seems to be crying. They have come to expect that mothers will not just wander off and leave their child alone. Very young children also are learning, through a process called social referencing, who is safe and who is dangerous. And they are making discoveries about who will become friends and what qualities friends show.
Dr. Narges Afshordi, who received her Ph.D. from Harvard in 2018 and is now a post-doc in the U of M’s Institute of Child Development, joins Marti & Erin to discuss these fascinating findings on how very young children work out their understanding of relationships. We think you will be as amazed as Marti & Erin were by what is going on in these young children’s minds.
What surprised you about Dr. Afshordi’s findings about the ways very young children are thinking about relationships? Take some time to watch a group of children between the ages of 1 and 4 and see what you notice about the way they interact with each other and the adults around them. What might they be noticing and discovering about relationships?
Related Resource:
To read the Pathway to the Future CEHD Connect magazine article, click here.
It’s common for children (and adults, for that matter) to worry about the dangers of tornados, blizzards and other major weather events. And, worried or not, we and our children may wonder about the meaning of different kinds of clouds or how a hail storm happens on a hot summer day. Belinda Jensen turned her own childhood curiosity into a career as a popular meteorologist on KARE-TV (NBC). Now she has written a 6-book children’s series that is sure to fuel fascination with the weather and, as she discusses with Marti & Erin, also help more girls and boys discover the excitement of learning about science.
What questions or concerns do your children have about the weather? What helpful ideas did you get from this Mom Enough show about addressing children’s worries and promoting their curiosity and learning?
To learn more about Belinda's books, click here. For Bel the Weather Girl experiments you can try at home, click here.
It can be difficult to think toddlers are terrific when they are throwing a tantrum at the grocery store, rejecting the fancy new potty chair you bought or shouting “No!” in response to nearly every request you make. But the toddler period really is a time of extraordinary learning and development, and even the most annoying behaviors signal some of those exciting changes.
Judy Schumacher is a family educator, mom, grandma and author of “Terrific Toddlers!” She joins Marti for a rich discussion of how to understand the behavior of toddlers and guide them to use all that energy and newfound independence in more constructive ways.
Why do you think tantrums and negativism are so common in toddlers? What is the developmental meaning of those behaviors? What practical tips or helpful principles did you get from this Mom Enough discussion?
Related Resources:
Toddlers & Tantrums tip sheet by Dr. Marti Erickson
When young people question their gender identity or reveal that they are not comfortable with the identity they were assigned at birth, it is a deeply emotional time for the young person, parents and other family members. What parental responses will help or hinder the young person’s health and well-being? What interventions, both psychological and medical, are available and appropriate? What are common feelings and concerns for parents as they navigate this major and complex change? And at what age – and to what extent – can young people be certain that gender change is the true path for them?
All of these issues are the focus of the work of Jenifer McGuire, Ph.D., Associate Professor and Extension Specialist in the Department of Family Social Science, who joins Marti & Erin for a candid and informative discussion of this important topic.
What experience have you had with transgender or gender nonconforming individuals in your family or community? What did you hear in this Mom Enough discussion that would be helpful to you in learning to support a young person who has questions or discomfort about gender identity?
Related Resources:
The transgender toolkit, click here.
Children's Mental Health eReview, click here.
For Transforming Families, click here.
For Gender Spectrum, click here.
Personal Reflections and Professional Insights Mom Enough podcast. To listen, click here.
The cultural landscape around both tobacco and marijuana use has changed significantly in recent years, and this week’s Mom Enough guest, Dr. Joseph Lee of the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, understands the important implications of this for young people.
Marketers tout vaping as a safer way to use nicotine and an effective means to stop smoking. Yet nicotine is a toxic substance in any form and the long-term effects of vaping nicotine have not been well-studied. Furthermore, people who vape when they are young tend to use more tobacco later. With regard to marijuana, legalization of recreational use in many states has led to full-on capitalistic efforts to refine strains, increase strength and offer products designed and labeled to appeal to a target market of potential users. But THC is known to have negative effects on young people’s developing brains, and, for a minority of users of any age, may trigger perceived threats and hallucinations. As parents, we need to know as much as possible about the use of both tobacco and marijuana among young people. And, as Dr. Lee makes clear, we need to understand how producers of these products may have their eye on our children. (Marti & Erin thank the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation for being a supporting partner of Mom Enough.)
What did you hear in this Mom Enough discussion that made you think in new ways about tobacco and marijuana use among young people? How have you talked about these topics with your kids, and how could you use these new insights in your conversations with them?
Related Resources:
How to Talk to Your Child about Drugs and Alcohol - Mom Enough podcast
Preparing Your Child for Healthy Choices about Substance Use - Mom Enough podcast
Drugs and Alcohol: How to Talk to Your Child tip sheet by Hazelden's Center for Youth and Families
We all have heard how important early childhood experience is for a child’s lifelong learning and development. So thinking about choosing the best preschool or childcare setting for your young child can feel daunting.
Matt McNiff, Assistant Director of Early Childhood Education at St. David’s Center, joins Marti & Erin to help clarify some of the different philosophies and approaches to early childhood education and to identify resources that can help assure you of the quality of programs you are considering. Most important, Matt advises you to think about what is most important to you and your family, as well as what will be the best match for your child’s personality and strengths. Matt wisely emphasizes the importance of observing the programs you are considering, paying special attention to interactions between teachers and children and to how happy children and teachers appear to be.
Reflecting on this Mom Enough discussion, what kind of program do you think would best suit your young child’s strengths and needs? Why? What values or priorities are most important to you as a parent and how can you discover which programs are consistent with those values?
Related Resources:
Childcare Provider Selection tip sheet by St. David's Center
Quality Childcare Check List for Parents by Parent Aware Ratings
St. David's Center Child and Family Development
Does your child struggle with homework, seem fidgety much of the time, or look dazed when directed to do something? Perhaps you (and your child’s teachers) need help in figuring out the optimal ways your child learns.
Are auditory skills strong? Does your child learn best with visual cues and demonstrations? Or maybe touching things and going through physical practice (kinesthetic learning) is necessary for success. Are there subject areas in which your child shows a strong interest and learns easily? Then maybe it is time for you and your child’s teachers to pull together to create more opportunities for your child to experience success, both academically and socially. Granted, some children struggling with schoolwork have a learning disability and need (and have the right to) special intervention. But this week’s Mom Enough guest, Dr. Elaine Fogel Schneider, knows there are individual differences among kids who do not meet criteria for a learning disability but who could benefit from extra support and analysis of the ways they learn best. And that kind of support is likely to help them find the confidence and joy they deserve.
Think of a time when you were learning a new and challenging subject. What strategies were most effective for you? How is that the same as or different than the way your partner or a good friend learns? Now think about your children and how they learn best. In what ways do you and your children’s teachers accommodate their differences and build on their strengths? In what ways could you?
Related Resources:
Confidence and Joy by Dr. Elaine Fogel Schneider
Creating a Home Environment that Promotes School Success tip sheet by Dr. Marti Erickson
Ways to Help Children Think About Better Solutions for Difficult Behaviors tip sheet by St. David's Center
Bright But Different article by Dr. Deborah Ross-Swain & Dr. Elaine Fogel Schneider
How does a mom rise above a harsh childhood to carve a very different path in raising her three highly successful daughters? This week’s guest has an inspiring story filled with practical tips!
Esther Wojcicki, educator, writer and mother of three highly successful daughters, had to overcome a challenging, hurtful childhood and find a way of parenting that was strikingly different than the way she was treated. This involved a great deal of careful reflection (what Marti often talks about as “looking back, moving forward”). Along the way, Esther discovered the T.R.I.C.K.* that she believes propelled her daughters to where they are today. Esther brings this wisdom to her new book, Raising Successful People, and to her heartfelt discussion with Marti & Erin in this week’s Mom Enough episode.
- Trust, Respect, Independence, Collaboration, Kindness
Think carefully about each of the five components of TRICK. In what ways are you addressing each of those in your relationship with your children? Which components come most easily for you? Which components are most difficult for you and what steps would you take to improve?
Related resources:
Being a Reflective Parent, Raising Reflective Children tip sheet by Marti Erickson
Learning to Play, Playing to Learn - Notes from A Night Out for ME® presentation by Marti Erickson and Erin Erickson
Parent's Role in Brain Development tip sheet by St. David's Center
Article on Esther Wojcicki
Being a moral person – a person of character – sometimes is defined as “doing the right thing even when no one is watching.” As babies, we all are ego-centric (self-centered), focused on our own immediate needs and feelings. Gradually, we develop the ability to recognize the feelings of others and discover the impact of our own actions on them, laying the foundation for the earliest stage of moral development, when we behave in a certain way to please our parents and other caregivers. So, what do parents and other caring adults need to do to help children move through higher stages of moral development, learn to discern right from wrong and discover the value for self and others in being a person of morality or character?
This week’s Mom Enough guest, therapist John Driggs, brings a humble, reflective perspective to this important topic in human development, offering much-needed encouragement and hope for our children’s future.
What did you hear in this conversation that prompted you to reflect on how you are supporting your children’s moral development? What factors in today’s world make it hard to teach your children right from wrong? What have you found to be most effective with your children?
Related resources:
Character Matters: How to Help Our Children Develop Good Judgment, Integrity and Other Essential Virtues, book by Thomas Lickona
Discussing emotions with children tip sheet from the University of Minnesota
Fostering Compassionate Children tips from St. David's Center
The Parents We Mean To Be: How Well-Intentioned Adults Undermine Children's Emotional and Moral Development, book by Richard Weissbourd
You know how essential regular exercise is for a healthy heart and strong body, but do you know that exercise and mental health are also closely linked? Discovering the energy and positive mood that exercise provides can become a powerful motivator to make exercise a habit.
Dr. Beth Lewis, psychologist and Director of the School of Kinesiology in the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development, conducts research on how to motivate people to exercise regularly. And recently, she has been studying the effects of exercise on depression in pregnant and postpartum women. Drawing her research on exercise and mental health, Beth joins Marti & Erin for an informative and motivating conversation about ways to stick to an exercise program, how to help your children make exercise a regular part of their routine and how much exercise we need in order to reap optimal benefits for our physical and mental health.
How much exercise do you get in a typical week? How about your kids? And how does that measure up to the most recent guidelines, described by Dr. Beth Lewis in this podcast? Think of three small steps you could take to enhance the way exercise is integrated into your family’s daily life.
Related resources:
College of Education + Human Development
Exercise Pregnancy Study, Healthy Mom Program
Physical activity guidelines for during pregnancy and postpartum
Healthy moms article by Dr. Beth Lewis
Maintaining Your Mental Health –For Your Sake and Your Children’s by Marti Erickson
Don’t let anyone tell you that stories about motherhood are boring! As writer and teacher Kate Hopper knows, a motherhood story can make us laugh, cry, nod in agreement and gasp in shock. It sheds new light on familiar experiences and calls us to new adventures. So, for 13 years, Kate has brought outstanding women writers to Minneapolis to read and discuss their work at her annual Motherhood & Words event. Marti & Erin are proud to bring this event to you again this year.
Sit back and listen as Anika Fajardo reads from Magical Realism for Non-Believers, her memoir about connecting with her Colombian father, becoming a mother and creating her own kind of family. Enjoy the powerful poems of April Gibson, who wrote about her experiences as a teen mother in her poetry collection Automation. Hear Kate Hopper read from her essay about the power of music in girls’ and women’s lives, drawing together strands from her own recent experience learning to play bass, a groundbreaking all-girl band in the 1970s and a major depression in college. And finally, listen to Janine Kovac read from her memoir Spinning, which weaves together the births of her micro-preemie twins and her history as a professional ballet dancer.
What did you hear in these readings that resonated with your own motherhood story and experiences as a woman? What in these readings inspires you to explore something new or to view familiar experiences in new ways?
Related resources:
Kate Hopper website
Anika Fajardo website
April Gibson website
Janine Kovac website
The 12th Annual Motherhood & Words Reading
Women are significantly more likely than men to have co-occurring addiction and mental health disorders, including eating disorders, with implications for how to engage and support women in getting the help they need.
Dr. Sarah Wicks, a clinical psychologist at Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, joins Marti & Erin in this week’s Mom Enough episode to discuss unique challenges faced by women dealing with addiction and, more broadly, how to approach a loved one (male or female) you believe has a substance use problem. She highlights how to approach the loved one in ways that will help the person be receptive rather than push away. Dr. Wicks also offers special advice for parents who suspect their teen may have problems with alcohol or drugs, pointing out the greater effect of those substances on the brains of people under 25. She introduces Marti & Erin to services tailored to teens and their parents, including outpatient services and phone coaching for parents.
Have women or girls in your family or circle of friends faced substance use problems? Other mental health issues? How was that similar to or different from what you have observed with males you have known? What do you think would help to reduce barriers to women getting treatment for addiction and mental health disorders?
Related resources:
Connection for Families phone-based coaching sessions
Teen Intervene education, support & guidance for teens & their parents
Women, Alcohol Misuse and Keys to Prevention and Recovery featuring Carrie Kappel
Women and Alcohol featuring Jill Seward
When Lenore Skenazy wrote about letting her then nine-year-old son ride the subway alone in New York City, she never imagined the uproar it would cause. But she didn’t let the cries of “bad mother” deter her from her mission of allowing her two sons to explore and flourish and build the life skills needed to navigate their world – to raise free range kids.
Now, through her writing, speaking and working creatively with schools and communities, Lenore is leading a movement to back off from helicopter parenting and Let Grow, as she named the nonprofit she and colleagues created. Tune into her lively discussion with Marti & Erin and then reflect on how you can let the children in your life be free range kids!
In what ways did you roam freely in your childhood? How are things the same or different for your children, and why? What do you think are the risks of protecting and directing kids so strongly in childhood and adolescence?
Related resources:
Let Grow
Let Grow blog
Let Grow schools
Free-Range Kids book
Why I Let My 9-Year-Old Ride the Subway Alone article by Lenore Skenazy
Unleashing the Instinct to Play featuring Peter Gray
Supporting Your Child’s Gradual Development of Healthy Independence by Marti Erickson
We all feel anxious at times, worrying about a stressful situation and maybe letting our feelings spiral out of control as we imagine a worst possible outcome. This is true for children, as well as adults; in fact, many studies show that anxiety in kids is on the rise, and at least one in twenty experience serious anxiety, including panic attacks and obsessive-compulsive behavior. When anxiety is persistent and severe, children need professional help. But, whether a child’s anxiety is severe or relatively mild, how parents respond makes a difference.
Psychoanalyst Dr. Laurie Hollman has taught graduate courses at NYU and is author of two new companion books, The Busy Parent’s Guide to Managing Anxiety in Children and Teens and The Busy Parent’s Guide to Managing Anger in Children and Teens. She joins Marti & Erin to talk about her 5-step approach, which is very compatible with the “reflective parenting” Marti & Erin speak about so often. One of their favorite parenting nuggets from Laurie is, “The louder you feel like talking, the softer you need to speak.” Listen for more words of wisdom on this important topic!
What were Dr. Hollman’s five steps for responding to your child’s anxiety? Think of a recent situation in which you tried to soothe your child’s anxiety. What would you have done differently if you had followed the five recommended steps for responding to anxiety in kids?
Related resources:
Books by Dr. Laurie Hollman
Blog by Dr. Laurie Hollman
School Anxiety tip sheet by Marti Erickson
Separation Anxiety tip sheet by Marti Erickson
Being a Reflective Parent, Raising Reflective Children tip sheet by Marti Erickson
When parents have a child with special needs, they often find that much of their time and energy goes into caring and advocating for that child. And they often experience a wide range of emotions about the daily challenges, hopes and uncertain future for their child. But what about siblings of a child with special needs? What are the common emotional challenges for them? And what are the possible benefits of living with – and learning from – a sibling with special needs?
In this Mom Enough show, Lori Brown-De Alba and Angie Bellefeuille from St. David's Center bring years of experience working with children with special needs and their parents and siblings, offering practical tips and helpful resources for parents and other caring adults.
Think of a family you know who has a child with special needs, as well as at least one child who is typically developing. What do you notice about the siblings of a child with special needs? For example, does that child seem more caring, patient or mature than most children his or her age? Does the child appear embarrassed by the sibling with special needs or perhaps resentful of the attention that sibling receives? What new insights or practical ideas did you get from this Mom Enough show?
Related resources:
Autism Resource List with suggested books & websites from St. David's Center
Playing with Children with Special Needs tip sheet from St. David's Center
Autism Day Treatment Program at St. David's Center
Sibling Squabbles tip sheet by Marti Erickson
Before contemplating how to be a happier parent, we should think back to when we decided to become parents. We probably envisioned the fun of playing with our children, laughter and conversations around the dinner table and pride and joy in watching our children grow and learn. But, for many of us, we find those images replaced by days of rushed meals (or just a snack bar in the car), hectic drives from one sports event or music lesson to another and exhausted family members spending more time with their tech devices than with each other.
Writer KJ Dell’Antonia, former editor of the New York Times Motherlode blog, wanted to find out what had happened to happiness and what it would take for parents to find the joy they longed for. As she explains in her lively discussion with Marti & Erin on how to be a happier parent, KJ learned that joy comes with small changes – not by doing more, but by doing things differently. And she learned that when parents are happier, kids are too!
When are you happiest in your life as a parent? When are you least happy – and maybe sad, angry or resentful? What small changes could you make in your daily life to try to create more genuine happiness for you and your children?
Related resources:
Book by KJ Dell’Antonia
Blog by KJ Dell’Antonia
When Parents Disagree about the Best Way to Raise Their Children tip sheet by Marti Erickson
Encouragement: The Power Tool of Parenting tip sheet from St. David’s Center
Loosening the Reins When Children Become Teens and Young Adults tip sheet by Marti Erickson
Recognizing & Managing Parental Stress tip sheet from St. David’s Center
Have you shaken your head in disbelief when kids call the shots and parents allow their children to defy them, berate them or even bully them? Or have you been that parent yourself, allowing your child (tot or teen) to have that authority?
Therapist Sean Grover has seen the consequences of this unfortunate parenting approach and, in his practice, has helped many parents reclaim their power, with healthy results for both children and parents. He has pulled together what he has learned in his book, When Kids Call the Shots: How to Seize Control from your Darling Bully and Enjoy Parenting Again. With compassion and clarity, Sean identifies the underlying issues of guilt, anxiety and over-involvement that often lead parents to give up their authority. And he offers practical steps for restoring a healthy balance of power in family relations. Don’t miss Sean’s important and helpful discussion with Marti & Erin!
What did Sean identify as common reasons shared by parents for when kids call the shots? How have you experienced those issues of guilt, anxiety or a desire to make things easy for your child? How could it harm a child in the long run to be allowed to bully parents or to always have their way?
Related resources:
Articles by Sean Grover
Effective Communication with Your Adolescent Child tip sheet by Marti Erickson
Defiance article by Marti Erickson
Dad’s a Softie article by Marti Erickson
Demanding 2-year-old article by Marti Erickson
We love this new podcast from Gimlet media, and we think you will love it, too. It’s called Motherhood Sessions, and it is hosted by psychiatrist Dr. Alexandra Sacks. Listeners hear portions of Dr. Sacks' therapy sessions with women struggling with the significant life and identity shifts that accompany motherhood.
In this episode preview, Dr. Sacks talks with a mother named Julia. Julia was born in South Korea, but was adopted and raised by a white family. Now that she has her own child—the first biological relative she’s ever known—she’s rethinking her relationship with her own family, and on a search to find her birth mother.
Subscribe or follow Motherhood Sessions wherever you listen to podcasts!
Do you have a child or know a child who has been teased or bullied for being “different"? Or did you experience that in your own childhood? What did your parents teach you about embracing differences?
Craig Pomranz, a popular New York singer, dancer and actor, saw this happening to his young godson, who had ADHD and also resisted many of the rough and tumble activities boys in his school preferred. But Craig’s godson found a creative way to establish his own unique place among his schoolmates, and Craig turned that true story into a delightful, inspiring children’s book, Made by Raffi, now published in eight languages. That story is just a starting point for Craig’s rich discussion with Marti & Erin about how we can help our children flourish in their individuality and how we can teach them to respect the rights of others to do the same.
In what ways have stereotypes limited your own behavior and choices, both when you were young and as an adult? How is that the same or different for your children today? In what ways do you help your children move beyond stereotypes to learn the importance of embracing differences, both for themselves and in accepting other children who are different than they are?
Related resources:
Fostering Compassionate Children tip sheet from St. David's Center
Putting a Stop to Bullying tip sheet by Marti Erickson
Every parent knows the heartache of hearing your baby or toddler cry when you leave them with a sitter for the evening or perhaps even head out of town on a business trip or child-free vacation. But the thought of separating children from their parents forcefully in a highly stressful situation, with no certainty of when – or if – they will be reunited, is almost unimaginable to most of us.
Dr. Megan Gunnar, professor of child development at the University of Minnesota, has spent her career studying the biology of stress and the impact of stress hormones on children’s physical, cognitive and emotional development. She joins Marti & Erin today for an important and timely conversation about the biology of separations, highlighting the potentially devastating consequences of the kinds of separations happening to refugee children, while also providing helpful and reassuring information and guidance about more ordinary separations, as well as longer, more challenging separations any family can face.
What are some of the unique elements of separating children from their parents at the border that put these children at such great risk for their future development? Considering more usual separations (or even especially difficult situations such as a long hospitalization or a military parent being deployed), what can help children thrive and adapt to those separations without undue threat to their longterm development?
Related resources:
College of Education + Human Development
The stress of separation CEHD Connect magazine interview with Megan Gunnar
Keys to Effective Parenting in the Face of Stress and Trauma tip sheet from CEHD
Your Children’s Experience of Positive Stress and Toxic Stress featuring Megan Gunnar
Separation Anxiety tip sheet by Marti Erickson
Supporting Children Experiencing Separation Anxiety tip sheet from St. David’s Center
When your toddler throws a toy in anger – or your teen slams the door and refuses to talk to you – your first impulse may be to yell at them. But how effective is that? And what would be more helpful, both in this situation and for the child’s longterm development?
Dr. Jane Nelsen, author of the well-known Positive Discipline book series (and a mother, grandmother and great-grandmother!) helps us move beyond a quick reaction to misbehavior, take a moment to consider the meaning of our child’s behavior and remember to help our child maintain a sense of connection and belonging. With practical examples drawn from her work and personal experience, Jane helps us move toward a new understanding of children’s misbehavior and arrive at discipline practices that support children’s growth and learning and helps us be the thoughtful, sensitive example our children need.
Think about a recent situation in which you needed to deal with your child’s misbehavior. What would you say was the meaning of your child’s behavior? To what extent did your response preserve the sense of connection between you and your child? Are there positive discipline tools that you would like to try the next time you encounter a similar situation?
Related resources:
Positive Discipline Parenting Tool Cards
The Whole-Brain Child featuring Dr. Dan Siegel
Teaching Children to Be Accountable for their Behavior and Choices tip sheet by Marti Erickson
What is a Parent’s Role in Brain Development? tip sheet by St. David’s Center
Most of us want to eat healthy and teach our kids about the importance of healthy eating. But it can be a challenge to sort through all the messages from experts, “wannabe” experts and well-meaning friends. Are all sugars the same and how much is too much? What about grains in our diet? How can we be sure we and our children eat enough veggies? If we eat a balanced diet, do we need to take supplements? What about probiotics for gut health? And are there foods that contribute to acne (a concern for many moms of teens)?
Cindi Lockhart, registered dietitian and founder of Wellness 4 Women, has made it her mission to help parents get the research-based information they need about healthy eating, learn quick and easy ways of using that information in the kitchen and at the market, and use fun, creative ways to engage children in planning and preparing tasty, healthful meals and treats. Listen to this lively, informative discussion as Marti & Erin tap into Cindi’s knowledge and experience!
Related resources:
Wellness 4 Women
Tips on multivitamins, inflammatory foods, acne & probiotics by Cindi Lockhart
Seriously (and Siriously) Delicious Healthy Meals featuring Siri Pinter Daly
How to Keep Food Fun tip sheet by St. David’s Center
When parents divorce, children typically experience a wide range of feelings, including loss, sadness, fear, anger and anxiety. These feelings come out in different ways, depending on age, personality and circumstances. But there are many things parents and other caring adults can do to help children cope and even thrive beyond this challenging time.
Child psychologist Dr. Jordan Hart joins Marti & Erin for a rich discussion of divorce and children, a topic that affects so many families.
What have you experienced or observed about divorce and children in your family or circle of friends? What were some of the most important points in this week’s Mom Enough discussion and how do those match your own experience or observations of divorce and children?
Related resources:
Bridging Parental Conflict® class
Managing in the Middle class for children
Parenting Together – Even Through Divorce tip sheet by Marti Erickson
It is not uncommon for a young child to be expelled from child care due to a challenging behavior, especially hurtful behaviors like biting or hitting. And yet it’s hard to imagine a young child who doesn’t occasionally lash out in frustration or anger and have a hard time calming down and re-engaging in a more positive way. In early childhood (birth to 5), children are just learning how to manage emotions, share space and attention with others and handle conflict in reasonable ways.
As this week’s Mom Enough guest knows, children learn those lessons best when parents and other adults connect with them, recognize their feelings and engage them in thinking about what they can do differently. Dr. Anne Gearity joins Marti & Erin for a rich discussion that will help you think about and respond to challenging behavior in ways that are effective in the short-run and supportive of healthy development in the long-run. Thank you to Help Me Grow, a supporting partner of Mom Enough, for providing sponsoring this episode of Mom Enough.
Dr. Gearity says when children act out they are telling us, “I’m confused. I need your help.” Think of a recent situation in which a young child in your life engaged in a very challenging behavior. How did you respond and how did it work? How would your response have been different if you’d thought of the child saying, “I need your help?”
Related resources:
Help Me Grow
Developmental milestones from Help Me Grow
Pete the Cat: I Love My White Shoes
Ways to Help Children Think About Better Solutions for Difficult Behaviors tip sheet from St. David’s Center
Long before children enter formal education, they are constantly learning from parents and other caring adults who interact with them through language stimulation. Before they even begin to speak, babies are making sense of language, building a vocabulary and developing conversational patterns. They are laying the foundation on which all later learning will build. So, to make sure our children have this important foundation, do we need to be fluent in English, have a house full of books or know formal teaching strategies?
Dr. Alisha Wackerle-Hollman, from the School Psychology Program within the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development (CEHD), brings reassuring answers to these questions and more. As research shows, we need to speak to our babies about ordinary things in the language with which we are most comfortable; growing up bilingual is an asset, not a liability. We need to follow our children’s interests, describing how things feel or taste, what they are doing (e.g. splashing in the tub) and what we are doing (e.g. wrapping baby in a warm, soft towel). When babies begin vocalizing, we need to take conversational turns, pausing to let baby “speak” then taking our turn. (Alisha says “strive for 5” conversational turns.) We also need to embed our culture in conversations with our children, offering traditional foods, singing songs, saying prayers and participating in celebrations. Not only will these things help our children’s language stimulation, but they will help us build close, loving, joyful relationships!
Do you have babies or young children in your family? Think of some of the special, fun, important things you can teach them by talking, singing and playing during everyday activities. How can you work language stimulation into what you say and do while dressing your baby? Cooking dinner? Getting ready for bed?
Related resources:
College of Education + Human Development
Promoting Language Development in Children featuring Dr. Maria Sera
Learning Language, Learning through Language featuring Melissa Koenig
Early Language Development tip sheet from St. David's Center
Supporting Second Language Development tip sheet from Way to Grow
We moms are often hard on ourselves, thinking we should be able to raise perfect children, keep a clean house, cook nutritious meals, stay on top of our jobs and always have a smile on our face. We often feel embarrassed or ashamed if we need to ask for help, sacrificing sleep and good health to do everything on our own. We pay a high price for that, and alcohol misuse often is part of the picture, with consequences not only for us but our children and other family members too.
Carrie Kappel knows this, both as a professional working with Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation and as a nurse and drug counselor approaching the 10-year anniversary of her own sobriety. We urge you to listen carefully to this important discussion about the ways isolation, anger, anxiety and depression often contribute to alcohol misuse, critical components of treatment for women and the role of family members in recovery. Carrie also addresses the prevalence of addiction among health care providers, with a particular focus on nurses, with whom Carrie works as Director of the Nurse Professionals Program at Hazelden Betty Ford’s campus in Center City, MN.
What did you learn in this Mom Enough discussion about the emotional challenges of caregivers (including moms, nurses and other health care providers) and how that can increase vulnerability to alcohol misuse and abuse of other substances?
Related resources:
Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation
Women and Alcohol featuring Jill Seward
Addiction Recovery for Moms, 5 Tips for Long-Term Sobriety
Nurses Peer Support Network
Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA)
National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA)
Science of Mindfulness by Erin Erickson
Pop culture bombards us every day with shallow, unrealistic messages about romantic love. But what does it really take to build love, commitment and connection that last? And why is this important for our children, as well as ourselves?
Los Angeles psychologist and author Dr. Bill Cloke joins Marti and Erin for a rich discussion of practical steps you can take to bring greater respect, understanding and love into your family life. A Valentine to you from Mom Enough!
The guest on this week’s Mom Enough show, Dr. Bill Cloke, talks about love as a “creation.” What does that mean to you and how is that different from the way romantic love is portrayed in popular media? Reflect on how you and your partner communicate in front of your children. What do you think your children are learning from what they see?
Related resources:
Bill Cloke's blog
Keeping the Spark in Your Relationship by Marti Erickson
As parents, most of us think of frequent praise – and maybe an occasional material reward for good behavior – as essential tools in helping our children build self-esteem and develop the positive behaviors we want them to have.
But this week’s Mom Enough guest, author Alfie Kohn, takes strong issue with praise and rewards, contending they undermine children’s intrinsic motivation, lead to reliance on extrinsic reinforcement and reduce generosity. Mr. Kohn goes on to challenge the pervasive focus on children’s behavior rather than their needs and motives, offering some practical, effective alternatives to praising and rewarding good behavior. Mr. Kohn’s many articles and books, including the bestselling 1993 Punished by Rewards (released recently in a 2nd edition), have prompted countless parents and educators to reconsider praise and rewards. Listen to what Alfie Kohn and Mom Enough hosts Marti & Erin have to say in this lively conversation.
What did you think of Alfie Kohn’s arguments against using praise and rewards to try to make children behave the way you want them to? Think of a parenting situation in which you’ve used praise. What could you have said and done instead that would have focused on your child’s needs, motives and the intrinsic rewards that might be more likely to lead your child toward the qualities of kindness, respect and responsibility?
Related resources:
Articles by Alfie Kohn
Books by Alfie Kohn
Teaching Children to Be Accountable for Their Behavior and Choices by Marti Erickson
When Christine Bauer was an 18-year-old college student just beginning pursuit of her educational goals and life dreams, she didn’t expect to confront what she refers to as “those three words” – “You are pregnant!”
Now, 34 years later, Chris has used Those Three Words as the title of an eloquent, moving book that tells the story of her choice to place her baby for open adoption and the remarkable relationships that have developed over the years among everyone involved.
Open adoption was uncommon when Chris gave birth in the 1980s, but Chris’ experience in the years since shines a light on the possibilities of open adoption as a viable positive option for birth parents, children and adoptive families. You will be touched by this hopeful story of love and choice.
What has been your knowledge or experience of adoption among people you know? How might open adoption prevent some of the emotional challenges faced by birth parents, adopted children and adoptive parents in the more secretive, closed processes that have been more common in the past?
Related resources:
Chris Bauer's website and book
Bellis, adoption education and support
Bonnie Rough show on sex education, as referenced by Chris
Although a majority of moms are employed during their childrearing years, many working moms still experience a nagging concern that their children some day will look back on their childhood and feel short-changed.
But a study by business leader and mother Pam Lenehan shines light on the overwhelmingly positive views of adult children reflecting on their moms’ work and the impact it had on their development. Pam presents these findings in her book, My Mother, My Mentor: What Grown Children of Working Mothers Want You to Know, the springboard for a lively and personal discussion on working moms with Marti & Erin in this week’s Mom Enough show.
What has your experience been with motherhood and employment, both in your childhood and as a parent? What do you think about the positive effects of moms’ work as described by participants in Pam Lenehan’s study?
Related resources:
Kids Benefit from From Having a Working Mom, article on Harvard Business School study
Separating Fact from Fiction about Parent‐Child Attachment by Marti Erickson
Who do you picture when you think of someone with an eating disorder? If you are like many people, you envision a young, underweight, white female. But eating disorders affect people regardless of age, ethnicity, gender or body type. And, as parents, we are key to recognizing the signs of a possible problem in our child, seeking appropriate help and supporting our child’s journey to a positive body image and healthy eating.
Claire Mysko, CEO of the National Eating Disorders Association and an internationally recognized expert on eating disorders and body image, joins Marti & Erin in this week’s episode of Mom Enough for an important conversation about this problem that touches so many lives. Along with her professional expertise, Claire also brings the compassion and wisdom that comes from having suffered with an eating disorder herself. Listen and share with other parents you know!
Thinking about what you heard in this discussion about eating disorders and body image, what examples do you notice in every day conversation, school policies or media messages that could feed into the negative body image so many young people experience today? To what extent have you experienced these issues in your own life, and how have you handled those feelings? What can you learn from that experience to help prevent your daughters and sons from struggling with similar issues?
Related resources:
National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA)
NEDA's toll-free and confidential helpline
Claire Mysko blog and books
Eating Disorders: Symptoms, Treatment & Risks
What are Eating Disorders?
A growing body of research shows the many benefits of nature experience. Nature experience supports children’s development of problem-solving, creativity and executive function. It also shapes physical health and, for both children and adults, can reduce stress and improve attention and focus. In recent years, mini preschools have integrated nature experience into their curricula, including the prestigious Shirley G. Moore Lab School in the University of Minnesota’s Institute of Child Development.
Lab school director Sheila Williams Ridge joins Marti & Erin this week to talk about why nature experience is so important, both at school and at home. She offers simple ways we can connect our children with nature, wherever we live and whatever our resources. Sheila‘s appearance on Mom Enough is sponsored by Supporting Partner Help Me Grow.
What did you hear in this Mom Enough discussion about benefits of nature experience for children’s mental and emotional development? Wherever you live, what are three things you could do to give your children the benefits of nature experience?
Related resources:
Help Me Grow
Children & Nature Network
College of Education + Human Development
Nature-Based Learning for Young Children by Julie Powers and Sheila Williams Ridge
Your Brain on Nature by Eva Selhub & Alan Logan
Balanced and Barefoot by Angela Hanscom
Connecting Children and Nature, list of nature activities for infants through teens
Shared Nature Experience as a Pathway to Strong Family Bonds by Marti Erickson
Free Forest School
Dodge Nature Center
The teen (and tween) years are a time of major change in our children’s bodies and brains – and in teenage behavior. Along with some of the wonderful growth in reasoning ability and independence comes a necessary challenging of parents’ ideas and authority. This often leaves parents feeling frustrated and unsure how to provide the guidance and protection our sons and daughters still need, especially in light of the risky teenage behavior that is so tempting to adolescents.
Psychologist David Walsh, author of Why Do They Act That Way?, joins Marti & Erin for an enlightening discussion of what’s happening in the adolescent brain and how that helps explain teenage behavior. And he affirms the importance of staying closely connected even when teens seem to push us away.
What did you learn in this Mom Enough discussion of the teenage brain that helped you understand the behavior of adolescents in your family or community? What creative ways can you think of to help teens find the thrills they desire in ways that are safe and positive?
Do you scramble to get out the door in the morning because you can’t find your glasses or your car keys? Do your kids miss the bus because they misplaced their homework or their mittens? Or are you afraid someone is going to recommend you for the TV show Hoarders because of the massive piles of junk in your basement or spare room? It’s time to get organized.
Sarah Cronin, owner of Simply Inspired Home Organizing, has seen it all! And she knows how to help you create simple systems that will result in a more peaceful, manageable physical environment and a less frazzled daily life.
Sarah joins Marti & Erin in this week’s Mom Enough episode for a helpful conversation about how to get started when organizing feels overwhelming, how to set inspired (and realistic) goals, how to choose what stays and what goes, and how to deal creatively with items that have sentimental value. Drawing on her background in child development, Sarah also offers wise advice on engaging children in the organizing process. Marti & Erin were inspired by Sarah’s guidance for how to get organized, and we think you will be too!
In what areas of your home or life are you most in need of organizing? Following Sarah Cronin’s advice to not bite off more than you can chew, what would be a reasonable organizing goal for your first steps to get organized? What ideas did you hear from Sarah – or come up with on your own – for handling items that have sentimental value but don’t fit your personal taste or décor?
For NAPO Minnesota, click here. For NAPO National, click here.
The science of mindfulness is used in mind-body strategies for reducing stress and anxiety, relieving pain, increasing energy and improving mood. In the daily ups and downs of parenting, mind-body techniques can be simple, effective tools to enhance your own wellbeing while setting a healthy example for your children at the same time. You also can help your children build these same mind-body skills at any age, giving them a head start on living a rich, peaceful, joyful life.
Mom Enough co-host Dr. Erin Erickson teaches mind-body strategies and uses them in her medical practice and in her demanding life as mom of three adolescents. In a twist on the usual Mom Enough format, Erin’s mom and co-host Dr. Marti Erickson interviews Erin on this important and practical topic.
Have you done any reading or taken a class on the science of mindfulness to learn mind-body techniques to use for yourself or with your children? What simple ideas did you hear in this Mom Enough interview that you could try right now? What resources are in your community to help you learn more about this?
For the Science of Mindfulness sheet, click here.
For our show on clinical hypnosis for children, click here.
For our show on mindful parenting, click here.
For more about meditation, click here.
To find your meditation style, click here.
For more about the heart-brain connection, click here.
Even if you love to cook healthy meals, the pressures of work, family and picky eaters sometimes can turn your passion to a feeling of drudgery. Siri Pinter Daly knows all about that and has made a career out of rising above the drudgery! Siri is the mother of three, author of both the blog and cookbook, Siriously Delicious, and wife of TV star Carson Daly, with whom Siri appears regularly in cooking segments on NBC’s Today Show.
But Siri made time to bring her relaxed, healthy, joyful attitude about food to this week’s free-flowing conversation with Marti & Erin. Siri and Erin find common ground in their homemade marshmallows, while Marti feels like a close friend of Siri after just reading the personal stories in her cookbook (never mind trying a few of the yummy recipes). All three women were hungry for really good mac ‘n cheese by the end of their chat -- maybe with a side of what Siri wisely calls "crispies." You’ll want to join in on the fun of this special Mom Enough episode.
What clever ways do you entice your kids to eat items from healthy meals that they are reluctant to try? What shortcuts do you use when you’re too tired to cook from scratch but want to serve a healthful meal? And what fun holiday treats might you make with your kids this year?
For Siri's blog, click here.
For the Siriously Delicious cookbook, click here.
For How to Keep Food Fun, click here.
For Ways to Change Foods, click here.
Infant hearing loss can have a lifelong impact on learning and development, presenting particular challenges in communication and social relations. But major improvements in early diagnosis (in newborns!) and treatment are changing the life course of countless children.
Peggy Nelson, a professor of audiology at the University of Minnesota, has been doing research in this area of early intervention since 2000 and brings a wealth of information and experience to her conversation with Marti & Erin in this week’s Mom Enough show. She also addresses the impact of chronic ear infections, something Marti remembers (with chagrin) from Erin’s early childhood. In this guest appearance, Peggy is representing Mom Enough’s supporting partner, Help Me Grow, the place to turn if you have questions or concerns about your young child’s development.
What new things did you learn in this Mom Enough discussion of infant hearing loss? Why is it so crucial that hearing loss is diagnosed and treated in infancy when possible?
To learn more about Help Me Grow, click here.
For infant and toddler communication and language milestones, click here.
To learn about newborn hearing screening in Minnesota, click here.
For BabyHearing.org resources, click here.
For the Communicate With Your Child brochure, click here.
For a transcript of this show, provided by Help Me Grow, click here.
When we think about kids and money, most of us probably know a young adult who has maxed out credit cards, failed to live within a budget, been blindsided by unexpected expenses and gone running home to Mom and Dad for a bailout. And most of us probably hope (or swear) that our kids won’t make those same bad decisions. So, what can we do right now, whatever the ages of our children?
Dr. Joyce Serido, from the University of Minnesota’s Department of Family Social Science, has focused her career on studying how families interact around financial matters and helping parents build effective skills and practices in what she calls “financial parenting.” Tune into this lively and informative discussion about raising kids who are financially competent. Even if you have an adult child who already is overly dependent on you for financial assistance, you will get ideas about how to begin to turn that around!
How are you doing “financial parenting” with your children? Based on what you heard in this Mom Enough discussion about kids and money, what would you like to do differently? How will you begin?
For Nathan Dungan’s show about teaching children about money, click here.
For Marti's advice on getting a child's spending under control, click here.
Young children are very physical beings and have great fun rolling around in the grass, jumping, wrestling, chasing and tickling each other. As parents, that roughhousing sometimes makes us uneasy, bringing out worries that someone will get hurt or the kids will get so riled up that they won’t be able to sleep for a week.
But early childhood educator Mike Huber, a supervisor at St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development (a supporting partner of Mom Enough), understands how valuable rough and tumble play is to children’s learning and development. Mike joins Marti & Erin in this week’s show for a lively discussion of this often overlooked aspect of children’s experience, prompting funny memories for Marti & Erin and inspiring them to do a little roughhousing themselves.
To what extent do your kids engage in rough and tumble play? How do you encourage or discourage roughhousing? After listening to this Mom Enough podcast, what things might you try to do differently?
For St. David's Center, click here.
For 6 Signs Your Child Could Benefit from Rough and Tumble Play, click here.
For Mike's Importance of Social Skills article, click here.
For the Rough and Tumble Play sheet, click here.
For The Importance of Play to Children’s Learning sheet, click here.
For Mike's author page, click here.
It’s a big change for parents when children begin college. Parenting college students is a new phase of parenting!
If our kids go away to school, we may wonder what is really going on in their lives. How often should we or the kids phone or text or email each other? How will we know if our kids are keeping up with their coursework or building positive friendships? Or, most important, how will we know if they are healthy, both physically and emotionally? If our kids are attending a local school and living at home, how do we figure out new boundaries and house rules to accommodate our students’ growing autonomy and maturity?
Jodi Dworkin and Marjorie Savage, from Family Social Science in the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development (CEHD), are familiar with all of these concerns related to parenting college students. They know the challenges can be even greater for parents of international students or parents who didn’t attend college themselves.
Jodi and Marjorie have put their knowledge and experience to work in developing a rich new website, Parenting College Students, to help parents of college students wherever they are. Marti & Erin are glad to know this website will be here for them when the next generation in their family head to college! (CEHD is a supporting partner of Mom Enough.)
When you went to college – left home for work or other life experiences – how did you and your parents redefine your relationship? What are the issues you expect to be most challenging for you and your kids when they move on to higher education?
For the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development, click here.
For more information about Jodi & Marjorie's website, click here.
For the Parenting College Students website, click here.
For Frequently Asked Questions from Parents of New Students, click here.
Many of us parents cringe at the thought of having “the talk” with our young adolescent kids. But the whole notion of having a single sex education session on the so-called birds and bees, let alone waiting until your child is an adolescent, ought to be thrown out entirely!
Author Bonnie Rough discovered some surprising lessons about this while living in the Netherlands when her children were very young. That experience led her to several years of research for her latest book, Beyond Birds and Bees: Bringing Home a New Message to Our Kids about Sex, Love and Equality.
Bonnie joins Marti & Erin for a thought-provoking discussion in this week’s Mom Enough episode. All three agree that teaching our children about sex begins when they are infants, in the verbal and nonverbal messages we give them about their bodies. Sex education continues as we teach young children the importance of consent and respect for their own bodies and others’. Ultimately, sex education is about much more than sex; it is about healthy relationships, grounded in love, respect and equality.
What messages did your parents give you about your body and sex? How did they connect those concepts to larger ideas about gender roles and relationships? In what ways do you want to do things the same or differently with your children?
For the National Sexuality Education Standards, click here.
For Bonnie's article on teaching young children about boundaries and consent, click here.
In the early months of life, a child grows and learns by leaps and bounds, making sense of language, emotions, social interactions and countless other aspects of the world around them. Between six months and one year there is a particular burst of development that is a veritable “social revolution.” But, as groundbreaking research is showing, children later diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) show observable differences from their typically developing peers by one year of age. Yet far too often these children don’t receive intervention until years later.
Professor Jed Elison from the U of M’s Institute of Child Development is one of the researchers leading the charge to improve the lives of children with ASD through early identification of autism and early intervention. In this week’s Mom Enough show, he calls us all to become informed, advocate for services and reduce the stigma of ASD.
What new information did you hear in this Mom Enough discussion about early identification of autism? If signs of ASD are observable as early as 12 months, why do you think the average age at which Minnesota children with ASD get service is 4.9 years? What can you do to help change that?
For the Elison Lab, click here.
For autism resources, click here.
Young children develop speech and language at varying rates, so how do you know when children are learning at their own pace or when there might be speech problems that need further assessment or intervention? If there is a problem with articulation or fluency, how might that influence other aspects of your child’s learning? And what is the most supportive and helpful way to respond?
Katie Adler, speech and language therapist at St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development, brings years of experience to her discussion of this important topic in this week’s Mom Enough show.
Have you or someone in your family had speech problems (e.g. stuttering, pronouncing certain sounds incorrectly)? Why and how can that affect other aspects of a child’s social development? Literacy? Confidence? What ideas or tips did you get from this Mom Enough show?
For our fluency and stuttering in preschool tip sheet, click here.
For 5 possible signs of stuttering from St. David’s Center, click here.
For St. David’s Center’s speech-language therapy information page, click here.
For Help Me Grow, click here.
For early childhood developmental milestones from Help Me Grow, click here.
In the current political climate, with disrespect and divisiveness being the norm, it may be hard to imagine why our children would want to become good citizens involved in civic activities. But our future depends on it!
Dr. Anne Klaeysen, head of the New York Society for Ethical Culture, brings many years of experience to this week’s timely Mom Enough show, offering clear and helpful ways to help our children discover their own values, learn what it means to be kind and fair on a large scale and recognize what they can contribute toward building a humane, ethical society, as children and throughout their lives.
What were some of the questions Dr. Klaeysen suggested asking your children to help them discover their own values? Whatever the ages of your children, ask them some of those questions in language appropriate to their age. What did you learn by listening to your children’s answers and to what extent were you surprised by what they said? Where are opportunities for you and your children to participate with other families to strengthen your own community and become good citizens?
For Dr. Klaeysen's blog, click here.
For NYSEC Youth and Family Programs, click here.
Many of us parents worry about the impact of technology and the ever-present devices that are such a huge force in today’s world. Indeed, we should consider carefully both the potential benefits and dangers of screen time. But we also should be open to research that challenges some of our assumptions and expectations about kids today.
Stephanie Carlson, Distinguished McKnight Professor in the Institute of Child Development (within the U of M’s College of Education & Human Development), joins Mart & Erin to talk about a fascinating new Marshmallow Test study that challenges popular beliefs about children’s ability to delay gratification, and she proposes ideas about what might account for her encouraging findings. (Thanks to CEHD for being a supporting partner of Mom Enough.)
What was your reaction to Dr. Carlson’s Marshmallow Test findings (i.e. was this different than you would have expected?)? Stephanie said she thought increased public awareness about the importance of “executive function” might be having a positive effect on children’s development. What do you know about executive function and where did you learn it?
For the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development, click here.
To read a brief about Dr. Carlson's study, click here.
For our executive function show with Dr. Carlson, click here.
For Dr. Carlson's lab, click here.
Have you watched a confident, rambunctious little girl begin to pull back when she approaches adolescence? This week’s Mom Enough guest has, and she is committed to empowering girls and preventing that decline in confidence that so often happens with girls after they peak at about age 9.
Longtime educator and founder of aWe, Inc. (Academy for Women’s Empowerment), Kristi Hemmer joins Marti & Erin for an important and provocative discussion of the ways girls and women give away their power through speech, body language and attributions that dismiss their own talent and hard work. Listen with a friend and then consider how you can claim your own power and raise your daughters to do the same.
What have you noticed in your own life about the things Kristi Hemmer pointed out about the ways females “give away their power”? What would you like to change in your own speech and body language? What ideas for empowering girls do you have to help your daughter(s) keep their confidence as they get older?
To learn more about the International Day of the Girl, click here.
To register for the October 7 International Day of the Girl Festival in St. Paul, click here.
For Amy Cuddy's TED Talk on body language, click here.
We’ve all heard the question, “What kind of world are we leaving for our children?” But Dr. Shilagh Mirgain, a health and sport psychologist at the University of Wisconsin, turns that question on its head and asks, “What kind of children are we leaving for our world?”
Whatever the ages of your children, don’t miss this inspiring and practical discussion of how to help your children develop compassion for themselves and others, recognizing the common humanity, vulnerability and imperfection we all share. Learn concrete steps you can take today to help your children be more grateful, kind and mindful in their daily lives.
This week’s Mom Enough guest talks about the importance of “showing up for yourself as you would for a dear friend.” Give examples of what that would look like in your life. What concrete steps could you take to help your children treat themselves with such compassion?
For Dr. Mirgain’s self-compassion article that Marti mentioned, click here.
For more of Dr. Mirgain’s blog articles, click here.
For our sheet on Fostering Compassionate Children, click here.
Dav Pilkey was a self-described trouble-maker in the early years of school, often ending up alone in the hallway when his teacher had had enough. Struggling with both reading and attention, Dav passed his time by drawing cartoons of the colorful characters in his imagination – a superhero named Captain Underpants was created in 2nd grade!
Dav joins Marti & Erin today to describe how he eventually became an avid reader and a highly successful author and artist whose books have engaged countless kids, including many reluctant readers. Dav’s story and his wise advice will inspire you whether or not your own children struggle as Dav did.
Does your child (or did you) struggle with reading, paying attention or other demands of school? What has helped your child (or you) build a talent or special interest that helps buffer the struggle you’ve had? How could Dav Pilkey’s teacher have handled his behavior differently, taking advantage of his imagination and love of drawing?
For fun activity sheets from Dav, click here.
Women and alcohol consumption may appear harmless – many of us enjoy a glass of wine at the end of a hard day or a celebratory mimosa at a weekend brunch. But how much alcohol is too much? When do you know if drinking has become a problem for you? And how does a woman’s risk of alcohol-related problems differ from that of a man?
Jill Seward, Executive Director of Nursing at the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, joins Marti & Erin for an information-packed, research-based discussion of this important topic, with facts that are likely to surprise you. Tune in for your own sake and that of your daughters!
What new things did you learn in this Mom Enough discussion about women and alcohol? What are some of the reasons women are more vulnerable to the effects of alcohol than men? Did this discussion lead you to reconsider your own use of alcohol? Or did it motivate you to help your daughters understand this important information?
For the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, click here.
For an online addiction quiz, click here.
To learn what to expect in rehab, click here.
Psychologist Peter Gray had spent years studying the biological foundations of emotions in rats and other mammals. But when his 9-year-old son had an angry outburst in the principal’s office, Peter was moved to tears and soon found himself shifting his research focus to studying education from a biological perspective.
Peter's conclusions about what is missing from children’s lives in terms of pretend play and exploration without adult direction are addressed in a powerful way in his book Free to Learn: Why Unleashing the Instinct to Play Will Make Our Children Happier, More Self-Reliant and Better Students for Life. Whatever the age of your children, Peter’s conversation with Marti & Erin will lead you to careful reflection on how to support your children’s success and happiness.
Think about the past week. How much time has your child spent playing without adult direction? How about doing pretend play (dramatic play) with other children? What did you learn in this Mom Enough interview about the benefits of this kind of play? How can you create more opportunities for your child to exercise creativity through free play?
For Peter’s Psychology Today blog, click here.
Whether you are dealing with a toddler’s tantrums, an 8-year-old’s messy room or a teen’s resistance to homework, parent education and support can help you use the situation to help your child build important skills and values. Parent education also can ease your stress and build your confidence as a parent.
Faith Mianulli, lead occupational therapist at St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development, brings a gentle philosophy and proven strategies to her discussion with Marti & Erin on this week’s Mom Enough show, drawing on years of teaching parents the STEP approach (Systematic Training for Effective Parenting). Tune in for tips you can use today!
Think about a parenting dilemma you have confronted with your child in the past week. How did you respond? How is that the same as or different from the STEP approach (Systematic Training for Effective Parenting) discussed in this week’s Mom Enough interview? What could you do differently the next time you face a similar challenge?
For Faith’s tips on encouragement, click here.
For Faith’s tips on effective listening, click here.
For more information on St. David’s Center, click here.
People across the political spectrum find common ground in advocating for investing in early childhood programs to make sure children in our communities are ready to thrive and succeed in school. But how early should those programs start? To what extent should parents be actively involved? And what return on investment can we really expect, assuming programs follow best practices?
University of Minnesota economist Dr. Art Rolnick and Executive Director of Way to Grow, Carolyn Smallwood, join forces in this Mom Enough discussion to address those questions and to highlight the importance of building strong, culturally relevant partnerships with parents even before their baby is born. (Way to Grow is a supporting partner of Mom Enough.)
What are some of the longterm benefits of effective programs for parents and very young children? How would those results benefit your whole community and, in specific, affect the quality of your own life, now and later? What did Art Rolnick say about the financial return on investment (ROI) for investing in early childhood programs and how do you think that ROI compares to other public investments in our communities?
For Is Your Young Child On Track to Succeed in School?, click here.
For Art's Invest Now or Pay More Later ME show, click here.
For Way to Grow, click here.
For Help Me Grow, click here.
For MinneMinds, click here.
Let’s face it; some children have us walking on eggshells. They get rattled when something interferes with their usual routine. If we try to rush them out the door in the morning – or if they’ve missed a couple hours of sleep – they may go into a complete meltdown.
Parent educator and author Mary Sheedy Kurcinka calls these children “spirited” and, in her popular book, Raising Your Spirited Child (now in its 3rd edition), helps us understand what’s going on in the brains and bodies of these children. In her interview in this week’s Mom Enough show, Mary offers practical, concrete tips for helping spirited children adapt and thrive. Marti & Erin have some stories and insights about the spirited children in their own family too!
How does this week’s guest, Mary Sheedy Kurcinka, define what she calls the “spirited child”? Do you have or know a child who fits that profile? What in this Mom Enough discussion helped you better understand that child’s behavior and think about what you can do to help that child (and those around him or her) be more comfortable and adaptable?
For Mary’s resources, click here.
Whatever the age of your children, reading aloud to them will improve vocabulary, language development, reading skills and the love of reading for information and pleasure.
This week’s Mom Enough guest, Lynette Guastaferro, CEO of Teaching Matters, challenges us to take reading to our kids to a new level, whether they are preschoolers or teens. With practical examples and tips, she highlights how reading aloud from books, newspapers and other advanced sources – and discussing the material with your children – will improve vocabulary, reading comprehension and overall critical thinking. Listen carefully and put these ideas to work in your own household!
Have you tried reading advanced books or articles to your child? What has been your child’s response? What have you discovered about your child’s understanding of complex material and ability to think about it?
For age-leveled book lists (birth to 12 years), click here.
For Early Reading Matters (program to develop teachers to improve K - 2 reading), click here.
For 10 Tips for Supporting Your Child in Reading and Writing, click here.
For Book Lists for Read-Alouds and Independent Reading, click here.
Nancy Carlson understands children’s feelings and turns that understanding into delightful picture books that help children confront some of life’s most embarrassing experiences.
In this lively, free-wheeling discussion with Marti & Erin, Nancy highlights two of her books: the self-explanatory Sometimes You Barf! and It’s OK to Ask, a wonderful story about how to help your children connect with and respond to children with visible disabilities (a collaboration with Gillette Children’s Specialty Healthcare). Tune in so you and your children can benefit from the insights and humor in this special Mom Enough show.
What embarrassing experiences do you remember from your childhood? What could adults have done to make it less embarrassing for you? How can you make it easier for your children when they encounter something similar?
For Nancy’s daily doodles, click here.
For Nancy’s blog, click here.
For the mother’s open letter about reacting to her daughter’s genetic syndrome, click here.
For the Anderson Center, click here.
From the time kids enter high school, thoughts of “What's next?” become increasingly important. How do I find the right college for me? Do I want a large university or small college? Close to home or far away? How can I look beyond big name schools to discover a gem I might not have heard of? What do I need to do now to increase my odds of getting in and getting a scholarship or financial aid? How do I prepare an application that stands out from the crowd?
Mary Hill, Director of College Counseling and Academic Planning at St. Paul Academy and Summit School, takes on these question and more in this informative and important discussion. With two kids starting high school this fall, Erin (and Grandma Marti) were soaking up everything this guest had to offer!
What do you and your children know or think about college or other higher ed options that might work? What practical tips and resources did you learn about in this Mom Enough discussion that could help you and your kids find the right college match for them?
For College Counseling Resources, click here.
For Questions to Ask on College Tours, click here.
For BigFuture, click here.
For the Colleges That Change Lives website, click here.
For the Colleges That Change Lives book by Loren Pope, click here.
For the Net Price Calculator Center, click here.
Dr. John Tauer is a big believer in the benefits of sports and the potential of youth sports to build character, discipline, teamwork and conflict resolution skills. John is in a relatively unique position as both a coach of one of the winningest basketball teams in the country and a psychology professor who studies motivation at the University of St. Thomas. He doesn’t always like what he sees in youth sports and coined the acronym “WOSP” (well-intentioned, overinvolved sports parents) for his recent book, Why Less Is More for WOSPS: How to Be the Best Sports Parent You Can Be.
John challenges the extreme and unrealistic ways too many of us parents approach our children’s athletic involvement. He offers tips for healthier ways to help our kids build a more balanced set of skills and interests that will serve them throughout life, while still celebrating the joys and benefits of sports.
For John’s blog on sports and motivation, click here.
For John’s basketball camp, click here.
For John’s book, click here.
For a related sport parent show with Nicole LaVoi, click here.
You probably know how important attachment is in the early months and years of your child’s life. But according to attachment research, how does the quality of that attachment relate to your child’s behavior and competence as a teen or even an adult?
This week’s Mom Enough guest, Dr. Glenn Roisman, has focused his career on studying how early relationships with parents and others are the starting point for social, cognitive and biological development throughout a person’s life. Representing the University of Minnesota’s College of Education & Human Development (a supporting partner of Mom Enough), he joins Marti & Erin for a rich discussion of recent research findings on attachment, childcare and other factors that shape development. And he highlights new research trying to untangle both genetic and environmental influences and the ways they interact.
In what ways is the quality of a baby’s relationship with parents and other caregivers important to lifelong development? What, if anything, was surprising to you in this Mom Enough discussion of attachment research?
For the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development, click here.
For Separating Fact from Fiction about Parent‐Child Attachment, click here.
To learn more about STEEP, click here.
“Who is interested in shaping your child’s attitudes around money?” That is the first question posed by this week’s Mom Enough children and money guest, Nathan Dungan, financial advisor and founder of Share, Save, Spend.
The answer to that question – and examples of how our culture lures our kids to spend, spend, spend – should make us all sit up and take notice! But we do not need to be powerless; from 5-minute family money meetings to teachable moments at the grocery store, restaurant or ATM, this Mom Enough episode is packed with ways to clarify your own values about money, instill those values in your children and give your kids voice and choice in family money decisions.
What practical ideas did you get from this Mom Enough discussion about children and money? How are these tips different from what you currently do and what next steps could you take to build your children’s money wisdom?
For tips for igniting money conversations, click here.
For the Share Save Spend blog, click here.
For Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood, click here.
Many of us parents feel intimidated by how early children are moving into relatively advanced mathematics – and how much we already have forgotten of the math we learned in school. Or, as Mom Enough host Erin observed from her kids’ experience, we may not understand the specific ways math is taught these days.
Nonetheless, as guest Lesa Clarkson describes, there are many fun and interesting activities we can do with our kids at every age to get them excited about math in everyday life and possibly inspire them to love math!
What are some of the fun ways Dr. Clarkson suggested supporting children’s math learning at home? Thinking of the ages and interests of your own children, name two or three specific math-related activities you can (and will!) try with them.
For the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development, click here.
For Preventing Summer Learning Loss, click here.
There are many legal and financial pieces to consider in estate planning for young families. Do you have a will in place? Have you filed documents specifying who would care for your children if something happened to you? And what about putting money in a trust for your children with clear conditions for when and how they can access it?
This week’s Mom Enough guest, attorney Gretchen Baker, answers these questions and more in this very informative discussion about a topic that is crucial to a family’s security and well-being. Marti & Erin learned a lot and you will too!
What new things did you learn about estate planning for young families? To what extent have you made an adequate plan for your family in case something happened to you? What further steps should you consider?
Clinical hypnosis for children can sound strange or even scary to many of us. But University of Minnesota pediatrician Andy Barnes finds hypnosis for children to be an effective, child-friendly way to help his young patients (tots to teens) use play and imagination to strengthen self-regulation skills and manage their behavior in situations that challenge them.
In concrete, practical terms, Andy discusses how he uses hypnosis and biofeedback in his practice and also mentions books and inexpensive devices that can help parents and children enhance their self-regulation skills beyond the doctor’s office.
In talking about his use of clinical hypnosis for children, Dr. Barnes stated, “It’s always self-hypnosis.” What did he mean by that? Give an example of ways he engages his young patients in self-hypnosis.
For the Be the Boss of Your Body series, click here.
For Conquering Your Child's Chronic Pain, click here.
For HeartMath, click here.
For the National Pediatric Hypnosis Training Institute (NPHTI), click here.
For Andy's show on habits like nail-biting, nose-picking and thumb-sucking, click here.
For Andy's show on potty training, click here.
As parents, most of us would rather not even think about the possibility that our son or daughter could develop an addiction to alcohol or other substances. But putting our head in the sand and ignoring signs of possible substance abuse only increases the risks.
Dr. Leslie Adair, Director of Mental Health & Family Services at the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation’s adolescent and young adult facility in Plymouth, MN, brings the information we need to recognize signs of possible substance abuse, to seek an evaluation by an experienced professional and if needed, to get appropriate treatment and family support. Leslie also answers Marti & Erin’s questions about addressing the needs of siblings and helping family members know how to talk to others about the problem.
What has been your experience with substance abuse and addiction among people close to you? What did you learn in this Mom Enough discussion about signs of a possible substance abuse in teens and young adults? What resources are available for evaluation and treatment in your community?
For more information on Teen Intervene, click here.
For tips for if you suspect teen alcohol or other drug use, click here.
Countless couples have traveled the road of infertility, with all its uncertainty, heartache, difficult interventions and associated emotional and financial costs.
Alyssa Wright and Monica Landolt White, marriage and family therapists at The Family Development Center, have worked with many individuals and couples at different stages in this process. And, as Monica describes, she has faced the complex challenges of infertility herself. With remarkable insight and compassion, Alyssa and Monica highlight the psychological impact of infertility and offer hope and guidance to people facing these challenges, as well as friends and family who wish to offer sensitive support. Don’t miss this important conversation!
Have you or people close to you experienced barriers to becoming pregnant when desired? What were some of the effects on the prospective mom or dad? On the couple relationship? How did friends and family respond, and what was helpful or unhelpful? What did you hear in this Mom Enough discussion that gave you new insight into the impact of infertility?
For The Family Development Center, click here.
For The Family Development Center's infertility counseling, click here.
For our Infertility resource sheet, click here.
For Twin Cities infertility resources, click here.
For RESOLVE, The National Infertility Association, click here.
For a fact sheet on religious perspectives about infertility, click here.
For decades, Search Institute has studied assets that are most important for helping children and teens grow up well. In their study of the parent and child relationship, they examine the importance of five key strategies in developmental relationships in the family: 1) express care; 2) challenge to grow; 3) provide support; 4) share power; and 5) expand possibilities.
Tune into this week’s Mom Enough show to hear Gene Roehlkepartain discuss how these strategies benefit children, which are most often missing in the families Search studied, and what you can do to apply these important findings for your child’s lifelong success.
What was surprising to you about the findings from this Search Institute study? Why do you think so many families have trouble sharing power? What practical ideas did you take away from this Mom Enough discussion of the parent and child relationship?
To read the report and other material from the study, click here.
For ParentFurther, click here.
To take the quiz mentioned by Gene, click here.
To read more about developmental relationships, click here.
Many studies have documented a common slump in academic performance and behavior when children reach grades 4, 5 and 6, with the trend particularly striking among children in poverty. There are various theories about why this happens, including increasingly complex task demands in the upper grades, a shift in peer culture and parents pulling back because of uncertainty about how to help their children in this new period of development.
The most important question may be what parents can do to prevent this slide, and this week’s Mom Enough guests, Anthony Allen and Alison Dakota from Way to Grow, offer practical guidance based on years of experience working with children and families.
Have you experienced this academic performance or behavioral slide with a child in your family? What factors do you think contribute to that slide? What are some of the tips Tony and Alison provided in this Mom Enough discussion?
For Way to Grow, click here.
For 4 ways to empower you as a parent to effectively advocate for your child, click here.
For tips on supporting your child's school success, click here.
For 6 tips for successful family-school partnerships, click here.
Since 2007, author and writing teacher, Kate Hopper, has invited a select group of women writers to read from their work at her annual Motherhood & Words Reading at the Loft Literary Center in Minneapolis. Kate’s mission is, in her own words, “to highlight the amazing writing out there by women about motherhood.”
As in years past, Mom Enough is proud to bring you this year’s event, featuring: Erin O. White, writing instructor and author of Given Up for You: A Memoir of Love, Belonging and Belief; Kaethe Schwehn, recipient of a Minnesota Book Award, writing teacher and author of The Rending and the Nest, Tailings: A Memoir, and Tanka & Me; and Sophfronia Scott, former writer and editor for Time and People, author of Love’s Long Line and Unforgivable Love: A Retelling of Dangerous Liaisons and co-author of This Child of Faith. Have a cup of tea, kick back and prepare to be amazed by these talented writers and mothers.
For Kate’s website, click here.
For Erin's website, click here.
For Kaethe's website, click here.
For Sophfronia's website, click here.
For Motherhood & Words, click here.
Wherever we and our children look, we confront ads for the latest ways to get “the perfect body” along with air-brushed images of celebrities with unattainable bodies. How do those messages influence our children’s eating behaviors and affect their ability to have a positive body image? Even more important, what can we do to counteract those unhelpful influences and support our sons and daughters in maintaining strong healthy bodies and feeling good about the skin they are in?
Dr. Katie Loth, from the Department of Family Medicine and Community Health at the University of Minnesota, joins Marti & Erin to discuss some recent research findings that might surprise you. And she offers practical tips that will help you be more reflective about the subtle ways you shape your child’s attitudes, behavior and self-acceptance.
How do Katie Loth’s research findings about body image and weight gain compare to what people often think about how to encourage weight loss or prevent weight gain in girls and young women? Why do you think the pattern was different for boys and girls? Reflecting on your own words and actions, in what ways could you improve the way you support healthy behavior and positive body image?
To read the research findings, click here.
To read an editorial about the research findings, click here.
To read an article about the research findings, click here.
For Project EAT, click here.
For Marti’s suggestions on promoting a healthy body image, click here.
We often think of infants and very young children as being naively trusting and ready to believe what any adult tells them.
But Melissa Koenig, professor in the U of M’s Institute of Child Development, is part of a team of children’s trust researchers who are showing that even babies know how to be skeptics. These provocative findings raise important questions about how children’s trust enters in to learning and how parents and teachers can earn the trust of children and help them build their ability to recognize honesty at a time when it’s often hard to come by. (Thank you to the U’s College of Education and Human Development for providing this week’s guest.)
What was surprising to you about Melissa Koenig’s findings about young children’s trust? Marti & Erin and their guest talked about the need for parents to be “transparent” with their kids and to only make promises they can keep. Give some real-life examples of when this advice could be implemented.
For Can children save us from the fake news epidemic?, click here.
To watch Trust Through the Eyes of Children, click here.
For Melissa's Early Language and Experience Lab, click here.
For the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development, click here.
For Melissa's ME show discussing learning a second language, click here.
For more on the marshmallow experiment, click here.
Providing proper nourishment for our children is one of the basics of parenting, so when our picky eaters reject our healthful offerings we may panic.
This week’s Mom Enough guest, speech clinician and author Jenny McGlothlin, talks with Marti & Erin about how to discern ordinary picky eating from a more serious feeding disorder. And drawing on STEPS, a feeding program she developed at the University of Texas in Dallas, she offers guidance for helping children work through feeding problems.
After the interview with Jenny, stay tuned for a Relationships that Nurture brief with Katie Adler from St. David’s Center talking about stuttering, an issue Marti confronted in her son’s early years.
What has been your experience with picky eaters in your family? How have you and others handled it? After hearing this Mom Enough discussion, what would you do differently now?
For Helping Your Child with Extreme Picky Eating, click here.
For the Stuttering in Preschool tip sheet, click here.
For Speech-Language Therapy at St. David’s Center, click here.
ASD affects a large number of children across all ethnic groups, and prevalence among Somali children in Minnesota has been cause for particular concern in this community. For many reasons, far too few of children with signs of autism are identified before they start school, although parents and other family members often have a sense that the child’s development is not on track.
This week’s guests, Megan Weber and Aida Ibrahim, have been working at St. David’s Center to make sure all children with ASD are identified and receive appropriate intervention as early as possible, whatever their cultural background. Part of that effort includes community partnerships to reduce stigma, an increase in diversity of staff and a day treatment program specific to East African children ages two to six. (St. David’s Center is a supporting partner of Mom Enough.)
What did you learn in this Mom Enough discussion about specific signs of autism in very young children? What can we all do to reduce stigma and encourage families to seek help for their children as early as possible?
To learn more about autism treatment at St. David's Center, click here.
To learn more about St. David’s Center’s Autism Day Treatment for East African families, click here.
For information about The Harman Center, click here.
For our understanding the early signs of ASD show with Dr. Jed Elison, click here.
For our early identification and intervention show with Dr. Jennifer Hall-Lande, click here.
Do you worry that your child isn’t walking, talking or playing with other children in the way you would expect? Does something about your child’s behavior make you uneasy? Do you know what early intervention services are available?
This week’s guests, Amber Lampron and Rebecca Wald, help you know where to seek answers to your questions and concerns. They explain the typical process in evaluating your child’s development and, if necessary, getting appropriate support and intervention for you and your child – at no cost to you. The best news of all is that early intervention helps children succeed in all aspects of learning and behavior, and it can help you know how to be the advocate and supporter your child needs. (This episode is brought to you by Help Me Grow, a supporting partner of Mom Enough.)
Has your child or someone else in your family or circle of friends received early intervention services? What did you learn in this Mom Enough discussion that you didn’t know about how these services work?
For Help Me Grow, click here.
To refer a child for a developmental screening or evaluation, click here.
For What Happens When You Refer a Child Through Help Me Grow?, click here.
For Does My Child Need Infant and Toddler Intervention?, click here.
For Does My Child Need Preschool Special Education?, click here.
For early childhood developmental milestones, click here.