The Barefoot Office: Recent Episodes
Shane Marcus
Dietrich Bonhoeffer was said to have read scripture every day, and, like Jacob with the angel, would wrestle with it until he received a blessing. I hope this may bring a blessing to you; for me, it is about the discipline of wrestling.
We read and reflect on John 4:27-42. I talk about when someone isn’t ready to receive something they might actually need. I struggle to find an intention.
We read and reflect on John 4:1-26. I talk about leaving a legacy at my high school. I also talk about asking for help in my new job.
We read and reflect on John 3:22-36. I talk about my youth group worship team. I also talk about my new prayer beads.
We read and reflect on John 3:16-21. I talk about control and manipulation. I also talk about judgment already having passed.
We read and reflect on John 3:1-15. I talk about a favorite fantasy series, and then about being a wind spirit. I also talk about how I can know who to trust.
We read and reflect on John 2:13-22. I talk about how I don’t share my own story... and then give myself permission to sit with it for a long as I need to before I share it.
We read and reflect on John 2:1-12. I talk about being a “not-person.” I also talk about being a phenomenon without a value judgment... and a dance.
We read and reflect on John 1:43-51. I talk about a God of joy. I also talk about using this passage as an introduction.
We read and reflect on John 1:35-42. I talk about skills I used at a high level in a former life. I also talk about being at peace being wholly unexceptional.
We read and reflect on John 1:29-34. I talk about my favorite musician. I also talk about the fruit of the spirit.
We read and reflect on Luke 18:9-14. I make a tweak to the intro of the podcast. I talk about being judgy and trying to be equal. I also talk about my reality.
We read and reflect on Mark 5:35-41. I tell a story from my CPE. I also resolve to go about my faith and ignore the ridicule of others... and especially not to make it my own.
We read and reflect on Mark 4:21-34. I talk about fear and trembling and love. I also talk about trying to give up dairy.
We read and reflect on Mark 5:1-20. I talk about Jesus giving mercy to demons. I also talk about being afraid to talk about my recovery to my (wider) family.
We read and reflect on Mark 4:35-41. I talk about doing things at my own pace and waking up to create the peace and presence in my own life and still my own storms. I also talk about embracing my own fears and waking Jesus up when I need to.
We read and reflect on Mark 4:21-34. I talk about a song from my childhood and how to focus more on grace. I also talk about clearing the 1k listens bar.
We read and reflect on Mark 4:1-20. I talk about the non-judgment Jesus has about whether or not spiritual truth takes root. I also talk about being all the different types of soil, and it feels liberating.
We read and reflect on Mark 3:19b-35. I talk about the family we are born to and the one we choose, talking about my role as the most child. I mention but don’t talk about Satan casting out satan.
We read and reflect on Mark 3:7-19a. I talk about calling and an upcoming interview. I also talk about text threads and community.
We read and reflect on Mark 2:23-3:6. I talk about the Sabbath. I also talk about going to the statue of Mary to talk.
We read and reflect on Mark 2:12-23. I talk about a person I encounter at work. I also say a sentence or two wondering about fasting.
We read and reflect on Mark 2:1-12. I talk about forgiveness and what I want in a higher power. I also talk about working on the shift from cynicism to generosity.
We read and reflect on Mark 1:29-45. I talk about the double bind of the lost child. I also talk about not knowing whether to name my demons or to silence them.
We read and reflect on Mark 1:14-28. I talk about the rage that breaking the status quo engenders. I commit to finishing step four in the next two weeks.
We read and reflect on Mark 1:1-13. I talk about the wilderness and purpose and community. I also talk about repentance and grace.
We read and reflect on Revelation 3:18-29. I talk about “Hymn To The Creator of Light,” and then about being aware of my own thoughts. I also talk about being ok with knowing my own thoughts and not sharing them.
We read and reflect on Revelation 2:8-17. I talk about wanting to know my own unique secret name. I also talk about the challenge of being able to suffer and be present to my pain without shutting it down by being afraid of it.
We read and reflect on Revelation 2:1-7. My recording cut out and I don’t know where... and I’m too lazy to fix it. I talk about change and the lies my brain tells me. I commit to texting my youngest brother.
We read and reflect on Matthew 12:14-21. I get on a soapbox about the terrorists who overran the capitol building today. I commit to focusing on myself and my own corner of the world.
We read and reflect on 2 Peter 3:8-13. I talk about time and about metaphor. I challenge us to find the brightness in dark places.
We read and reflect on 2 Peter 1-7. I talk about the mockery of Facebook. I commit to protecting my sleep.
We read and reflect on 2 Peter 2:10b-22. I talk about Facebook as a place for anger and ignorance, and commit to giving serious thought to leaving the platform.
We read and reflect on 2 Peter 2:1-10a. I talk about my visceral reaction against perfectionists and tell 2 Peter to take a chill pill. Then I talk about reframing difficult behavior as seeking connection and commit to giving as much of it as I can to my oldest.
We read and reflect on 2 Peter 1:12-21. I talk about Facebook, and then privacy, and give myself permission not to self-neglect. I talk about just being myself in my upcoming interview.
We read and reflect on 2 Peter 1:1-11. I reflect on godliness being antecedent to love, and how I have live within me but also other things. I talk about knowing that I could teach more about the Bible, even if that isn’t the work of this space.
We read and reflect on 2 Thessalonians 3:6-18. I talk about a relationship that is ending because of judgment from afar. I speak aloud my intention to give Christmas cards to people.
We read and reflect on 2 Thessalonians 2:13-3:5. I talk about what comforts me. I resolve to handle some $ nonsense this weekend.
We read and reflect on 1 Thessalonians 5:12-26. I talk about what it takes for me to have a peaceful environment. I resolve to be thankful to others on my birthday.
We read and reflect on 1 Thessalonians 5:1-11. I talk about needing more sleep earlier in my life. I commit to reframing help as help and not shame.
We read and reflect on 1 Thessalonians 4:1-12. I talk about leading a quiet life and my hope for new shoes. I commit to repeating a mantra to myself in the mirror.
We read and reflect on 1 Thessalonians 3. I talk about holiness, and then Paul, and then a camp leader that I loved. I commit to raising my hand in thanks for the relationships I have and long for that have shaped me into who I am.
We read and reflect on 1 Thessalonians 2:13-20. I talk about the mantra “take what you like and leave the rest,” and make it my intention to follow it.
We read and reflect on 1 Thessalonians 2:1-12. I talk about needing to present myself as only myself in an upcoming job application. I commit to making friends with the sadness at the core of my soul.
We read and reflect on 1 Thessalonians 1:1-10. I talk about my mom and then my prayer life and my struggle with it. I then talk about 3 intentions I have.
A contemplative prayer practice for Advent 1 without the explanation of what is going on. Foe the explanation, listen to yesterday’s episode!
We read and reflect on James 5:13-20. I tell a story of being anointed. I also commit to yellow book work and to asking for people to pray for my health.
We read and reflect on James 5:7-12. I talk about enduring in my recovery and letting go of what is the right way to do it. I also talk about a way of understanding God that I reject. I finish by commuting to be mindful of my swearing, and to finish a passion project before Christmas.
We read and reflect on James 3:13-4:12. I talk about The Donut Man and then about how this passage sounds like ACA recovery to me. I sort of commit to just sitting in my Christmas lights for some time every night during Advent.
We read and reflect on James 3:1-12. I talk about what choices I made in high school and then about how my heart is not pure, and never will be, and try to make my peace with it. I commit to be more mindful of my swearing.
We read and reflect on James 2:14-26. I talk about a which needs to be cared for first, the physical or the spiritual. I commit to looking up 8 Can’t Wait and Deray McKessan’s work.
We read and reflect on James 2:1-13. I talk about how I feel about wealth. I also talk about my oldest and how all negative behaviors are seeking connection, and how I try to give him love and safety.
We read and reflect on James 1:1-15. I talk about enduring in my recovery, and how I’m dealing with the wound of perceived abandonment by some close friends. I talk about going to hold my fox and cry.
We read and reflect on Revelation 22:12-21. I talk about the dance between love and boundaries. I also talk about the process of the formation of the Bible. I end talking about my birthday present to myself.
We read and reflect on Revelation 22:1-11. I talk about interrupting the curse of family dysfunction. I also talk about sharing and telling and finding God in my own story. I commit to sending a text message and a tithe.
We read and reflect on Revelation 21:15-27. I talk about the lamb’s book of life, and I commit to choosing grace. I also talk about blue light lenses in my glasses.
We read and reflect on Revelation 21:1-14. I talk about writing and needing to own my own story.
We read and reflect on Revelation 20. I talk about the second death and my non-belief in eternal torment. I also talk about the space it gives me to stop judging myself to believe in judgment based on works rather than on faith.
We read and reflect on Revelation 19:11-21. I talk about the unknowable name I have and we all have and the other names we put on. I talk about standing in the sun.
We read and reflect on Revelation 18:15-24. I talk about being on the path of hurting to healing to helping. I also let the grass of my intentions grow at its own pace.
We read and reflect on 1 Corinthians 14:1-12. I talk about poetry. I have three mini-inventions for myself, all about putting writing and ideas into action.
We read and reflect on Revelation 18:1-14. I talk about the economy, and about judgment and forgiveness. I also talk about seeing the mo(u)rning.
We read and reflect on Revelation 17:1-18. I talk about God being more complex than I usually assume. I pick a song to post to Facebook.
We read and reflect on Revelation 16:12-21. I talk about conflict and God being in the rage and sorrow and pain and I smile at the end of it. I also talk about giving voice to my shame.
We read and reflect on Revelation 16:1-11. I talk about how I’d be pissed at God, too! And I make connections to Job and Exodus. I also talk about being ready to start looking for new jobs.
We read and reflect on Revelation 14:1-13. I talk about being tired. I talk about my relationship with my fear of anger and give myself grace not to choose to trigger it, even if there might be more peace on the other side. I commit to kneeling in child’s pose before I sleep.
We read and reflect on Revelation 13:11-18. I talk about technology, and how I fear it and love it. I talk about following up with my enneagram coaching course.
We read and reflect on Revelation 13:1-10. I talk about where I hear a blaspheming mouth. I also talk about fatalism and the mystery of God’s will. I also ponder a commitment to lectio divina all the daily office readings for Election Day.
We read and reflect on Revelation 12:7-17. I talk about wanting a life that I love. I talk about living God. I commit to scheduling spiritual direction.
We read and, uhm, reflect (?!?) on Revelation 12:1-6. I make a confession. I give myself grace for being in the vague direction of the wilderness.
We read and reflect on Revelation 11:15-19. I talk about my friend Otis and how I feel I’ve really hidden my inner authority / power / light under a bushel. I also talk about how grateful I am for my hybrid car.
We read and reflect on Revelation 11:1-14. I talk about love and fear. I also talk about giving gifts and death. Then I name how much I miss creating community with youth.
We read and reflect on Matthew 18:15-20. I talk about my fundamental self-betrayal. I also talk about feeling like the spiritual equivalent of a 7 year old learning to read.
We read and reflect on Revelation 10:1-11. I talk about the indifference of my higher power, the one that I poured my heart into. I also talk about wanting to write 15 minutes every day for a week.
We red and reflect on Revelation 9:13-21. I talk about the way that I tell stories. I also make a commitment to give each of my kids 15 solid minutes if attuned emotional attention tomorrow.
We read and reflect on Revelation 9:1-12. I talk about politics seeming like it is people mostly focusing on death. I also talk about responding to a message from my brother, to show up with what life I have in the life I have.
We read and reflect on Revelation 8:1-13. I talk about falling in love with thunderstorms at my grandpas side. I also talk about not wanting to be bitter, and a sincere step I took around politics.
We read and reflect on Revelation 7:9-17. I talk about suffering and being thirsty and coming through it all to life, and still needing to cry. I sing part of a song I haven’t heard since high school.
We read and reflect on Revelation 7:1-8. I point out the obvious connection to mythology in the text. I talk about Left Behind and the wind on my skin. I commit to getting up two minutes earlier to read “Courage to Change.”
We read and reflect on Esther 8:1-9, 15-17. I talk about how I see the state of what political parties care about. I also talk about flexibility and change.
We read and reflect on Esther 7. I talk about having some pity for Haman, strange as it seems to me to do so.
We read and reflect on Esther 6. I talk a out knowing what we want for our own honor, and I affirm myself. I also commit to (and challenge you to!) excessively praise and honor someone tomorrow.
We read and reflect on Esther 5. I talk about wisdom and facing one emotional hurdle at a time. I also talk about the first ACA promise and commit to giving myself approval.
We read and reflect on Esther 4. I talk about taking time to make decisions and not worrying about what other people expect, especially when I am at my bottom. I commit to writing out a story.
We read and reflect on Esther 3. I talk about the very small ways evil can become unquestioned and then normal. I also talk about wanting to live by a different law.
We read and reflect on Esther 2:5-9, 13-23. I talk about a beautiful assignment I had in seminary. I give myself permission not to parade my intentions of identity.
We read and reflect on Esther 1:1-4, 10-120. I talk about RBG’a passing and process my fury at Mitch McConnell and commit to doubling my donation to his opponent. Vashti... you go girl.
We read and reflect on Psalm 70. I give myself permission to enjoy the relationships where people seek me out. I also talk about the serenity of being able (and prepared!) to say “you might be right.”
We read and reflect on Psalm 62. I talk about politics and the president and how there are listeners who both abhor him and who support him. I commit to giving to a political campaign (though I don’t say which) and also listening to a politics podcast.
We read and reflect on Psalm 61. I talk about being sad in the present in a way that doesn’t affect my faith from the past or for the future. I also commit to writing in an affirmation journal for the length of one song.
We read and reflect on Psalm 64. I talk about the reality that words hurt. I also talk about the perhaps counterintuitive way that complaining helps us find out power.
We read and reflect on Psalms 8, 24, and 84. I talk about my immigration policy, and then pivot to not singing lots of songs I know. Then I talk about not feeling whole hearted.
We read and reflect on Psalm 138. I talk about being where I need to be in my recovery, about doing what I am able to do. I also commit to reaching back out to my kids’ godparents.
We read and reflect on Psalm 51. I begin by talking about the Aleghri “Miserere Mei” and “White As Snow” by Jon Foreman. Then I talk about the need to be made to hear of joy and gladness. I finish by naming ideas I have for social media fasts and confession and Instagram.
We read and reflect on Psalm 119:49-56. I talk about feeling like an impostor and dealing with my own jealousy and sense of not being special. I also talk about not feeling at home on the earth and watching the nfl opener.
We read and reflect on Psalm 52. I talk about building an affirming voice in my own head, and a parenting moment that was a chance to set a boundary and build a voice inside my son. I commit to writing and speaking affirmations to myself tomorrow.
We read and reflect on Psalm 42. I talk about being comforted that the Psalmist also doesn’t always recognize the cause of his emotions. I also give myself permission to be different than what I was, to be what I am.
We read and reflect on Psalm 31:1-5. I talk about god inside and god outside. I also talk about attention, connection, and intention; and then close by talking about the secret Nets we set for ourselves.
We read and reflect on Psalm 119:25-32. I talk about confession and absolution, and confess some of my self-victimization patterns. I commit to answering a text from my mom.
We read and reflect on Psalm 48. I talk about ways of waiting in silence and the phrase “don’t just do something, sit there!” I also talk about imagining a world that confounds the political powers of the day.
We read and reflect on Psalm 39. I talk about feeling my feelings and making them friends who come and go. I commit to hugging my stuffed fix and missing my youngest.
We read and reflect on Psalm 15. I talk about where we live and where we visit. I also imagined a piece of writing.
We read and reflect on Psalm 114. I talk about collective memory, and then about soft hearts and hope. I also talk about skipping for fun.
We read and reflect on Psalm 116. I talk about being given the 12 steps and walking through darkness and grief and sorrow. I also look forward to taking my rest tomorrow.
We read and reflect on Psalm 16. I talk about boundaries and trying to feel happy all the time and using body prayers. I also talk about the difference between the path and the presence, and I commit to keep walking.
We read and reflect on Psalm 18:1-20. I talk about the way I reimagined this Psalm where I am overwhelmed by my emotions, not literal enemies. I commit to lifting my physical arms up for God to pick me up.
We read and reflect on Psalm 10 together. I talk about the struggle of trying to find God in the (troubles of the) world. I also change the lament of this Psalm into an affirmation for myself, and for you.
We read and reflect on Psalm 4. I talk about the place where I meditate / ruminate / contemplate / pray / feel. I also commit to leaning into a Facebook conflict... and actually doing the writing I said I would do a few days ago.
We read and reflect on Psalm 113. I tell a story of being full of passion for a God who puts the lonely in families. I share my experience, strength, and hope and receive your affirmations in my imagination.
We read and reflect on Psalm 137. I talk about a short story in my imagination, and commit to writing a few hundred words if it.
We read and reflect on Psalm 142. I talk about the rules of the dysfunctional family: “Don’t talk, don’t trust, don’t feel.” I also talk about the shift from fear to gratefulness.
We read and reflect on Psalm 131. I talk about what it means to be quiet and why I struggle with meditation. I commit to spending 20 phone free moments in my hammock tomorrow.
We read and reflect on Judges 18:16-31. I talk about boundaries and limits and trust. I also talk about being willing to ask for what you want and not take it simply by power of greater strength. I commit to doing one journal page tomorrow.
We read and reflect on Judges 18:1-15. I talk about taking the time to find my place. I also talk about music and hymnody and finding a place for my musical faith.
We read and reflect on Judges 17:1-9. I talk about how strange money is. I also commit to saying yes to my oldest son more frequently.
We read and reflect on Judges 16:15-31. I talk about boundaries and freedom. I also talk about praising myself to stop myself from seeking others’ praise. I articulate a hope to write down my own praise for myself.
We read and reflect on Judges 14:20-16:14. I talk about escalation and violence and mimesis. I also talk about honesty and commit to spending time doing my step work.
We read and reflect on Judges 14:1-19. I talk about manipulation and the relationship between boundaries and freedom. I also talk about being direct in what I want... in a pretty vague way.
We read and reflect on Judges 13:15-24. I talk about finding the beautiful things of God and sharing them and letting them be my own. I also name out loud that I’ve had an idea as a way to keep myself accountable to it, to finding God in my imagination.
We read and reflect on Judges 13:1-15. I talk about the echoes of this story in the Jesus story (and the Abraham story). I also talk about how to find a new frame of reference and being willing to do so.
We read and reflect on Judges 12:1-7. I talk about right sizing different problems. I also talk about being creative to find different ways to get to the place our fear may be driving us.
We read and reflect on the collect for Proper 14. I talk about perfectionism and the need to always do what is right. I also talk - express some fear and confusion? - about the will of my higher power and what my higher power won’t ask me to do.
We read and reflect on Judges 7:1-16, 19-21. I talk about being aware and wary of who you follow and reveal that I might possibly have a disdain for politicians. I also commit to putting the fable from this passage on Facebook.
We read and reflect on Judges 8:22-35. I talk about how to find whatever it is that you worship, the thing on the altar of your life. I also talk about moving on, and how sometimes it is an indictment on your faith but it’s also just human.
We read and reflect on Judges 7:19-8:12. I talk about the human tendency to encourage and respect those who help us and to hate those who refuse to help us. I also talk about the tendency to not want to be with people until their work is done, and about how I want to be someone who can give grace to people in their work wherever I happen to encounter them.
We read and reflect on Judges 6:25-40. I talk about pragmatic faith and grace. I also talk about being afraid of people’s anger... and how it usually comes no matter what you do.
We read and reflect on Judges 6:25-40. I talk about pragmatic grace. I also talk about being afraid of anger, but receiving anger anyway.
We read and reflect on Mark 3:20-30. I talk about being divided against myself. I also talk about reaching out to some friends for a walk I am taking on Tuesday.
We read and reflect on Matthew 27:45-28:20. I talk about my first New Testament teacher.
We read and reflect on Matthew 27:32-44. I talk about not doing what everyone else says God is telling you to do. I also talk about living with the scorn of not doing that thing.
We read and reflect on Matthew 27:24-31. I talk about wanting people to live a certain way and enforcing it with laws, versus being with people who suffer no matter how they live. I also talk about my ACA recovery and how grateful I am for it.
We read and reflect on Mark 2:23-28. I invite you to pause and speak your own reflections aloud.
We read and reflect on Matthew 27:11-23. I talk about fear and finding God on the far side of it. I also talk about wanting to stop arguing and power struggling with my son.
We read and reflect on Matthew 27:1-10. I talk about how hearts change and the despair of getting what you set out to do. I also talk about one of my frequent daydreams.
We read and reflect on Matthew 26:69-75. I talk about the women who approach Peter and how we can’t know someone’s motives based on their actions. I also talk about denial and the pain of confronting it.
We read and reflect on Matthew 26:57-68. I talk about silence and defensiveness. I also talk about the ridiculous idea that someone could deserve death for speech. I finish by talking about bodies.
We read and reflect on Matthew 26:47-56. I talk about the coop text of Jesus’ statement about swords and mention the Ginger song “God and Country.” I also talk about walking through pain.
We read and reflect on Matthew 26:36-46. I talk about resting and wonder about the things and people that wear me out and the ones that give me joy. I also talk about the things we are all grieving and how to (try to) be present to them.
We read and reflect on Matthew 26:26-35. I talk about stuffing my feelings and wondering what makes me fall to pieces. I also talk about rash promises made and broken. I finish by talking about being a sheep without a shepherd.
We read and reflect on Matthew 26:17-25. I talk about my reflections on Passover in this particular text after watching the Prince of Egypt. I also wish to be at table reclining with my friends.
We read and reflect on Matthew 27:1-16. I talk about motive and motivations, and about doing beautiful things. I share something from my imagination.
We read and reflect on Matthew 25:31-46. I talk about finding the balance between doing for others and focusing on others. I also talk about individualism v collectivism.
We read and reflect on Matthew 25:14-30. I talk about developing new talents and what it means to me to feel seen and unseen... and I try to give myself grace. I also talk about facing and unpleasant duty.
We read and reflect on Matthew 25:1-13. I talk about setting an intention practice for myself. I also talk about grace for forgetful human beings.
We read and reflect on Matthew 24:32-51. I talk about those times that might be momentous and cause anxiety... even when sometimes they are already past. I also talk about desire and suffering and commit to do the work and walk the path in front of me.
We read and reflect on Matthew 24:16-31. I talk about the imperium and the unjustness of society and wealth. I also talk about a new family in my circle and describe a practice I am learning called tonglen breathing and practice it for them.
We read and reflect on Matthew 24:1-14. I talk about the Switchfoot song “Souvenirs” and how nothing lasts forever. I also talk about the difference between claiming to come in God’s name and just being myself and letting others tell me how they see God in me.
We read and reflect on Matthew 23:27-39. I talk about appearing holy and pure and how often the evangelical rules I grew up with str means if control rather than freedom or true knowledge. I also talk about the need for reparations and putting my money where my mouth is.
We read and reflect on Matthew 23:13-26. I talk about judgment and how Jesus seems to be sad in what he sees in the Pharisees, and how we make each other sad. I also talk about my attempts to let go of how I try to control others.
NOTE: the first 8 minutes of this episode did not save. We read and reflect on Matthew 23:13-26. I talk about loosening my grip of control on other people.
We read and reflect on Matthew 23:1-12. I talk about the human desire for attention and praise. I also talk about my hope to use the enneagram as a tool for self-transformation for others.
We read and reflect on Matthew 22:15-22. I talk about what things are God’s and the Psalms. I also talk about being direct.
We read and reflect on Matthew 22:1-14. I talk about celebration and the ways we know who is really happy with and for us.
We read and reflect on Matthew 21:33-46. I talk about the move from “reason” to “experience” and wonder about everyone theologizing their experience without universalizing it. I also talk about reflection and being grateful to have re-started spiritual direction.
We read and reflect on Matthew 21:23-32. I talk about feeling regret and wonder who is making changes for repentance that I should follow.
We read and reflect on Matthew 21:12-22. I talk about where I can just be, and how that is a prayer. I also talk about boundaries and freedom and not getting caught up in other people’s drama.
We read and reflect on Luke 13:10-17. I talk about vindication and having an answer for every argument thrown against me. I also talk about the invitation to be direct in my feelings and my speech.
We read and reflect on Matthew 20:29-34. I talk about distractions and interruptions and where God’s work gets done. I also talk about needing to know and name my own needs to be able to get what I need.
We read and reflect on Matthew 20:17-28. I talk about how I’ve abused this passage to abuse myself, seeking to serve to be great and so denied and abandoned myself. I also talk about what I want to be as a parent: gentleness, humor, respect, and love.
We read and reflect on Matthew 20:1-16. I talk about being a reactor more than an actor. I also talk about being a person who is jealous, and driven by compulsion.
We read and reflect on Matthew 19:23-30. I talk about giving things up to follow Jesus... or what I would if I knew I was following. I also talk about judgment and forgiveness and mercy and grace, and the higher power I would want to have.
We read and reflect on Matthew 19:13-22. I talk about giving things away, and about living inside the rules and how I’ve done it not to find life but to hide from it. I also talk about the rules that (might) help us find God, and commit to giving some of my excess energy to them tomorrow.
We read and reflect on Luke 12:49-56. I talk about the fact that conflict is just a part of living, of having passion or a mission, and the ways I tune out for either. I also talk about how to be about the work Jesus showed up to do, and prevaricate about taking an action step.
We read and reflect on Matthew 19:1-12. I talk about faith and scripture and where I am with them right now in an inverted curve. I also talk about receiving grace and love where I am. I commit to asking for a tender heart.
We read and reflect on Matthew 18:21-35. I talk about playing the victim and needing to learn how to give myself mercy.
We read and reflect on Matthew 18:10-20. I talk briefly about not trying to change those who cannot it will not change. I also winder aloud about being the person who others approach to change.
We read and reflect on Matthew 18:1-9. I talk about my ongoing lack of clarity around the relationship between the inner child, the true self, and the higher power. I also talk about how children feel a much greater range of emotions than I do, and have no problem ever expressing them. Ha! I also talk about how I see potential in this format for youth ministry.
We read and reflect on Matthew 17:22-27. I talk about doing things that I don’t have to do and what it means to be a reactor. I also wonder whether or not I am feeling my feelings and what it might take for me to face them.
We read and reflect on Matthew 17:14-21. I talk about my constant struggles with my oldest son and get a little angry he didn’t come with an instruction manual. I whine at Jesus for being annoyed at having to help me solve my problems.
We read and reflect on Luke 12:42-48. I talk about the privilege I have had and how much I have been given, and my willingness to give still more. I also talk about the inner critical parent and feeling controlled. I commit to meditating on what it means to be free.
We read and reflect on Matthew 14:13-21. I talk about the beauty and the plenty of the memorial site where George Floyd w murdered. I also talk about starting to see that in this world there is enough.
We read and reflect on Matthew 13:53-58. I talk about God’s other name and wonder who I have loved through a major change. I also talk about using my voice to amplify black voices, even if it doesn’t fit with the expectations of my hometown.
We read and reflect on Matthew 13:44-52. I talk about what it means to me that I’ve never had cause to cry out for the justice of God. I also talk about needing to be able to smell and to see what is rancid and rotten within myself.
We read and reflect on John 4:19-26. I talk about not having the inner authority sometimes even to claim what I know I am. I also talk about what we do and do not worship, and know, and see.
Reed and reflect on Matthew 9:18-26. I talk about being uncomfortable with a Jesus who loves the just and the unjust. I also talk about telling a story that isn’t my own, but a story that needs to be told.
We read and reflect on Matthew 9:9-17. I wonder about who it is that is sick in Minneapolis surrounding the murder of George Floyd. I commit to sitting for five minutes in silence.
We read and reflect on Matthew 9:1-8. I talk about faith and the faith of others and when right and wrong are just ideas we use to control others. I also start to wonder if feeling a connection to my higher power requires me to move through my own fear. And I don’t like it.
We read and reflect on Matthew 8:28-34. I talk about the voice that expects to be judged and condemned, and where it comes from. I also talk about moving on, even when the work has been good, and rose my hand to try to let go.
We read and reflect on Matthew 8:18-27. I talk briefly about the storms in my own life. I wonder about fear and faith and what we marvel at. And then I give up and go to bed. Ha!
We read and reflect on Matthew 8:5-17. I talk about the miracle of an authority figure who cares for someone he needn’t. I also talk about where I need to ask for the healing of others. I end by talking about being willing to have my own heart broken.
We read and reflect on Luke 10:17-24. I talk about not being able to see the thing I long for, even when it is present to me. I also talk about learning to rejoice in my existence itself, not to put myself up for my gifts and strengths or tear myself down for my failures and faults. Just to be. I commit to reach out to two people from my recovery group.
We read and reflect on Matthew 7:28-8:4. I talk about authority, criticism, and wonder who I would bow down to in spite of my fear. I also talk about giving gifts and commit to giving money away.
We read and reflect on Matthew 7:21-27. I talk about being angry at Jesus for rejecting people who did things in his name. I also wonder about the foundations of different things in my own life.
We read and reflect on Matthew 28:16-20. I talk about the apostle John and my first mentor and the command that Jesus gives his disciples. I also talk about giving money to a woman begging on the corner.
We read and reflect on Matthew 22:41-46. I talk about Jesus taking control of the conversation, and ponder where maybe I should do the same. I also talk about maybe starting to read and reflect on the Psalms.
We read and reflect in Matthew 13:18-33. I talk about my frustrations with Jesus and my u healthy relationship to money. I also share my hope to cultivate love within myself and to give it to myself so that I can create a home for many others.
We read and reflect on Matthew 13:1-16. I talk about sitting by the sea (well, the lake) in a hammock and how that helps me remain genuinely myself - to not just do something, but to sit there. I also talk about wanting to find God in my own life, not anywhere high and lifted up. I pray a prayer and variations from Alcoholics Anonymous.
We read and reflect on Luke 12:13-21. I talk about being overwhelmed by the abundance of possessions I have collected. I also talk about being shamed by popular financial teachings. I commit to being thankful for what I have now... and maybe even cleaning some of it up.
We read and reflect on Matthew 7:13-21. I talk about chasing my son through hidden paths at the dog park. I also talk about choosing Sabbath as a practice for life.
We read and reflect on Matthew 7:1-12. I talk about judgment and the inner critical parent, who is likely doing to us inside exactly what we are doing to others. I also talk about being taught that a prayer for myself is selfish, and so I ask a good gift from God and invite you to do the same.
We read and reflect on Matthew 6:25-34. I talk about the real worries for clothing and food I have every day, and the comfort that someone else knows my needs. I commit to going out to lay in the grass and look up at the stars.
We read and reflect on Matthew 6:17-24. I talk about the pattern I have had to dig into other people’s treasure, and wonder whether or not this was ministry or selfishness. I also talk about how it is music that gives light to my eyes. I commit to either looking into my own eyes or listening to music under my weighted blanket.
We read and reflect on Matthew 6:7-15. I talk about my greatest source of anxiety (my student loans), and the connection it has to forgiveness... and how I don’t know how to forgive (or be forgiven). I also talk about attunement, and commit to raise my hands in silence with the intention to know my higher power’s will and have the strength to carry it out.
We read and reflect on Matthew 6:1-6 & 16-18. I talk about the relationship between secrecy and loneliness.
We read and reflect on Luke 4:16-30. I talk about what it is to want someone’s attention and affirmation but not their criticism. I also talk about how I do not act for my own best interest because if the assumptions I make about other people’s reactions. I commit to praying the prayers from my recovery workbook.
We read and reflect on Matthew 5:38-48. I talk about the trials of raising my oldest son, and commit to pray for him (and ask for your prayers!). I also talk about my (fledgling) practice of writing out ways that I was an awesome dad during the day, and invite you to do the same for your context.
We read and reflect on Matthew 5:27-37. I talk about adultery and my story. I reflect briefly on what it might mean to cut out your heart and fling it away - to suffer.
We read and reflect on Matthew 5:21-26. I talk about being at peace with your own conscience, and owning your own faults vs. seeking to find out what other people hold against you. I also talk about what it is to have a “Getcha God” and how that lives inside of me. I recommit to finding intentional time to read my books about forgiveness.
We read and reflect on Matthew 5:17-20. I talk about two kinds of performance, one being shallow and the other intentional. I also reflect on the fierceness of Jesus, and commit to five myself grace even when - especially when! - I am afraid of Jesus’ ferocity.
We read and reflect on Matthew 5:11-16. I read my favorite prayer from the Book of Common Prayer if the Anglican Church in New Zealand.
We read and reflect on Matthew 5:1-10. I talk about my friend Josiah’s Earthmakers podcast ( https://open.spotify.com/episode/20N45LBKvuaWtKeB2HPrUg?si=164Z19RxTReHGcBDCTpb1w ) as part of my own spiritual practice. I also talk about the paradox of wanting to not be noticed but wanting to be approached, and I commit to giving myself attention in the mirror.
We read and reflect on Mark 6:30-44. I talk about the miracle if there being enough to share and still have more left over. I also reflect on how I am hearing Gods voice within me.
We read and reflect on Matthew 4:18-25. I talk about how weird it is that Jesus calls the brothers to leave their father in the presence of their father. I also talk about the childhood roles I play that keep me stuck as an adult. I commit to sending a picture of my face to my brothers.
We read and reflect on Matthew 4:12-17. I talk about light and darkness co-existing, and how it is impossible to eradicate the darkness... and how at dawn the shadows are long.
We read and reflect on Matthew 4:1-11. I talk about feeling deprived, and the power that the accusing voice has over me. I commit to sharing with my children’s godparents how sad and overwhelmed I am.
We read and reflect on Matthew 3:13-17. I talk about wanting a change of heart - and how you can want a change of heart even if it isn’t from utter darkness into light, just A change. I also reflect on self-worth and commit to affirm myself in the mirror before I sleep.
We read and reflect on Matthew 3:7-12. I reflect on what it means to do something with self-control rather than fall asleep to my own life... despite almost falling asleep while I read.
We read and reflect on Matthew 3:1-6. I talk about the voice in my head that denies that healing is possible, and the reflection I hear in today’s reading with my recovery book. I also commit to going out under the stars before I sleep.
We read and reflect on Mark 16:9-20. I talk about how I can’t be ready for new life when I am grieving, how the lizard brain fight or flight response is incompatible with reflection and new life. I also reaffirm my commitment to my hammock.
We read and reflect on John 16:16-33. I talk about cherishing and loving God, and being held in memories and old patterns during this quarantine crisis. I also commit to writing out ten things that give me joy, and naming them aloud to myself to keep myself from letting others take my joy.
We read and reflect on John 15:12-27. I talk about belonging and anger and hatred, and how hatred simply is; we can’t live our lives trying to avoid it. I also ponder the sequence Jesus describes as love, and how it amounts to vulnerability and intimacy, a willingness to share what is inside us.
We read and reflect on John 15:1-11. I talk about what it means to have a critical inner voice and how sometimes even this reading has caused me not to want anything. I also talk about needing a loving, inner parent to hear the real wants of my true self, and I commit to praying for myself.
We read and reflect on John 14:18-31. I talk about abandonment, fear, and how I torture myself with the anticipation of abandonment before it ever comes to pass. I also talk about the practices that give me peace, and how I realize that focusing on those practices allows God to come and find God’s home within me.
We read and reflect on John 14:8-17. I talk about being a people pleaser and how I hide myself from myself, and the fact that we are often hidden in our true natures from each other.
We read and reflect on John 14:1-7. I talk about the doctrine of the Trinity and how it shaped my faith even as it reflects my deepest longings.
We read and reflect on Mark 13:18-27. I talk about the unsustainability of trying to live like you only have five more minutes of your life. I also commit to ask God to be with me in my feelings in twenty minutes of breathing practice.
We read and reflect on Luke 24:1-12. I note that in this text the two men who appear at the tomb do NOT say “Be not afraid,” and that gives me permission sometimes to be afraid at the momentous events in my (spiritual) life. I also talk about owning my own story regardless of other people’s reactions.
We read and reflect on Matthew 28:17-20. I talk about whether or not we would really want Jesus to be with us every day. I also reflect on what it means to do this as a spiritual discipline and not as a time of teaching or study.
We read and reflect on Matthew 28:1-16, talking about how we are emotionally complex beings (NOT with the emotional range of teaspoons!). I ask how you will connect with the people you care for most deeply during the pandemic.
We read and reflect on Mark 16:9-20, thinking about how in times of pain and grief it can be difficult and even impossible to accept or believe or even hope for new realities.
We read and reflect on Mark 16:1-8, paying attention to time, secrecy, and the realization that it is ok to keep some things to ourselves.
We read and reflect on John 20:19-23, and why Jesus might say peace to his disciples both to calm their fears and to calm their joy.