BECAUSE COULD IS NOT SHOULDA man knows the difference between when women could and when women should.
Recently, I had a conversation with someone about women serving in the army.
The contention was that if a female can, then why shouldn’t she? Say the fitness tests didn’t have lower standards for women, say all qualifications were the same, if a woman passes them all, if a woman proves her strength and ability and agility to be on par with men, then let her serve. After all, she could.
Women could serve in the army, perhaps, but not in combat. In general, they don’t actually have the physical fitness to meet the same standards as men. They don’t actually have the same all-around military skillset as men. They don’t have the strength to drag a wounded man to safety. They don’t have the stamina to hike miles and miles and miles with dozens and dozens of pounds of equipment on their backs. They don’t have the same sort of tactical minds and strategic ways of thinking. Perhaps some of this could be taught, but the mindsets are fundamentally different at their core.
But what if there was a woman who could? If a kid was hurt, a woman could carry him miles and miles on her back. Even pregnant, if needed. Women could, and if they want to, they should.
No. No. Could is not should.
While it’s true there are some very strong women, and while it’s true that women have accomplished great feats of strength, these are anomalies most often occurring in heightened or extreme circumstances, where there’s a danger to life or a focused determination arising from a very specific need to get something very vital done. It’s not proof of enduring, reliable strength. It’s not proof of consistency. It’s certainly not proof that women should serve in combat, and everything else that entails, no matter their physical fitness.
Follow this argument long enough and someone will inevitably bring up the female sharpshooters who served in the Russian army during World War II.
True, women can often shoot equal to, even better than, men, but that does not mean women should serve as snipers in war. A job which requires endless hours of stillness, ducking bullets, and relieving yourself in the woods or plastic bottles. Is this what we envision for women? Is this the greatest they can achieve? Becoming predatory, patient, precise, hardened killers? Considering how men struggle with PTSD, why would we willingly subject women to it?
Oh, and as for those roughly two thousand female snipers that Russia sent to war, only about five hundred made it back. In body, at least.
Men have one job, one primary job, and that is to ensure women are nowhere near where bullets are flying. Unfortunately, women get caught in warzones, women get caught in terrible situations, but to deliberately send them out to serve in combat, to feed the beast of war, the thought should be too abhorrent to contemplate past its formation. Because could is not should.
Recently, I was helping to clean up after a social event. I was carrying a bag of garbage in a box out to the front of the house. It wasn’t heavy, and I carried it just fine. I passed from the kitchen through the living room, where a few young men sat on the couch.
“Don’t worry,” I joked to the sitting men, “I got it.”
They glanced up, saw that indeed the box was no issue, then went back to whatever they were doing. And why not? I was older, competent, a woman carrying out the garbage, but a woman who could carry it after all. Obviously, they were not needed.
A couple passed by, herding their two young kids to the car. The wife walked past first, saw what I was carrying, then turned to her husband and told him to take the box. He did so willingly, not because I couldn’t, but because I shouldn’t. So even though it wasn’t heavy, and even though I could carry it, I didn’t argue. I let him take it from me because he should, and if I would fight it, I would mold another man for that line on the couch.
A while ago, I was carrying bags into a local center. A man who knew me since birth was coming down the stairs. I wasn’t struggling, they weren’t that heavy. He was several decades older, but he took them out of my hands, because “a lady doesn’t carry bags.”
Maybe it’s because he grew up in the Midwest. Maybe it’s because he grew up right. Maybe it’s because he grew up before the hammerings of women and society effectively obliterated the distinction between could and should.
For we’ve lost the ability to discern the difference and with it we’ve lost something vital in how men treat women. Because men have incessantly been harangued for holding doors open because women are also strong, because men have been told not to be heroes because women do not need saving, because men have been yelled into accepting that women can do it themselves for we are just as competent as any man, if not more. Truth is, even where the data clearly states the facts to be otherwise, it doesn’t matter the details of what a woman could do but should.
In not being gracious about held open doors and bags taken out of our hands and checks paid at restaurants and the shielding of protective instincts, we’ve created a culture in which women take out the garbage, not because it’s full and the man isn’t home, but because the man sits on the couch and stays out of the way. And there’s a generation now, and more to come, who don’t know this isn’t how it should be. They don’t know that they shouldn’t allow it, because they’ve been angrily castigated into submission by crusading women who want to prove their strength by beating down men, then step on them further in bemoaning the lack of good men. They’ve been led to believe that insisting on carrying the bags, acts of protection, cleaner language, and the like, is belittling, stifling, unmindful of the women who could do it themselves, and just another way to prove them weak. Don’t do unto women what women can do for themselves is the skewed doctrine of current social etiquette ingrained into men. Can’t you hear the raw emotion, the lyricism in their expertly wielded profanity? An incessant insistence that we are no delicate violets has smashed the vase that held the bouquet, and left the rest of us wondering where the flowers went.
No wonder men are angry, jaded, lost, frustrated, and more, because when men are not allowed to know the difference between could and should, then it’s not just women affected, but also the men who can’t show their best selves in the way they treat women. Men are not challenged, demanded to become more when there’s no appreciative women to mandate it be so.
Men carry the bags, hold open the doors, put of the fires, deal in politics, arrest criminals, and even go to war not because of what a woman can or can’t do, but because of what she should. It’s respect and reverence to the women they hold on a pedestal, because that is how men should regard women. There’s no contention that women should be worthy of that treatment through raising men on a pedestal of respect and admiration too. Because women are not either allowed to be their best selves, also stifle their best selves when it is not in encouraging men to be the best they could.
So now that women have insisted that we can do it all ourselves, now that women raised in this world wonder where the men have gone, now that men aren’t allowed the simple fulfillment of being a hero, protector, provider, strongman, did we win? Did feminism fulfill its promise of freedom, as each successive wave eroded the pedestal we women stood upon, so our faux-exalted perch upon its present rubble is a pyrrhic victory at best? Have we won in remaking society by turning men into males because women were turned into men?
The answer lies beyond physical makeup to a fundamental truth, a truth that brings fulfillment, joy, meaning, and a balance of good and holy. It all comes down to a man knowing how vital is his role in discerning the difference between when a woman could and when a woman should.
http://eltenenbaum.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/08/Make-G-d-Mainstream-Again.mp3MAKE G-D MAINSTREAM AGAINThe surgical removal of G-d from society must be undone with deliberate, persistent reintegration.
As the academic year shifted to summer, focus on books in libraries and curriculums likewise shifted to summer reading lists. As an author, I’ve taken up some summer reading of my own, mainly used, bargain-priced books published over a decade ago. From the markings, many are former library books, since replaced with some of the books many parents are concerned about today.
Without rehashing what’s been spoken of many times before—though also not quite thoroughly enough—in regard to current books for young readers, I’ve noticed something about some of these summer reads beyond the more obvious choices of subject matter and protagonists. While many of the changes in children, teen, even adult, literature is quite clear from covers and blurbs, subtler changes were also implemented in the same time frame, ones less easily charted than bestselling genres, fads, and the like.
I’ve written before about the prevailing lack of historical fiction for young readers, and perusals of the options on hand for my summer reading has only further confirmed its current, glaring absence. There’s something else, however, something connected yet even more important that should not be overlooked. It’s something that probably doesn’t appear in studies or graphs or sales numbers, but detected only by those who look for it. Namely, and perhaps unsurprisingly, the removal of G-d from books for young readers, and adults too.
If you’re an avid reader, you may have noticed this, but only now realize how prevalent the practice truly is. Alternatively, this assertion may seem baseless, as numerous books among the highly popular fantasy genre, for example, mention religion plenty. Except, look again. More often than not these books speak of gods not G-d. Where there is monotheistic religion, it’s often portrayed as corrupt or at odds with the celebrated science or magic of the day. It’s backward, antithetical to progress and change, too politically powerful, home to a secret society of assassins, and many other things which don’t include honest, faithful service. So, while there may be religion in books, how is it really portrayed?
While that aspect of world building isn’t difficult to notice, what it used to be only recently struck so potently because the mention of prayer to a single G-d appeared in a book that wasn’t purely historical, where such reference could be relegated to accuracy as compared to modern cultural norms. The book for teens was fantasy, had dragons, yet the jailed, despondent protagonist kneeled in the dirt and prayed to G-d. Significantly, the book was from a major publisher, not a specifically religious one. To say, there was a time when mention of G-d in a mainstream narrative was commonplace, because it reflected a time when readers lived in a society where adherence to Him was commonplace too.
An editor once asked after my adamance to include a clear monotheistic belief in one of my fantasy series. The books didn’t focus on any particular religion, but were particular to mention Heaven as a Divine reference. Bear in mind, the question was from one practicing Jew to another, so there was no anti-religious sentiment at its base.
I think the question was both warning and curiosity. Warning that perhaps the inclusion was moving from present to preachy, and curiosity about why monotheistic Divinity needed to be so specifically noted, particularly in a fantasy realm.
The answer is a very simple and profound truth, because even in fantasy, there is no world without G-d.
This adamant assertion was unintentionally tested when I sat down to write a book that was largely historical fiction, albeit with a touch of fantasy. The book is set in ancient Egypt, a land of many, many gods, so a protagonist with pagan belief’s wouldn’t just be expected but also historically accurate.
Except, I couldn’t do it. No sooner had I begun to research the Egyptian pantheon, then I knew there was no way my fictional character living in a fictionalized historical setting would pay any sort of obeisance to this plethora of deities.
Because, endeavoring to make belief in G-d real down to the bones means that even in fiction, there is no world without G-d.
A number of religious authors write fiction for mainstream publishers. Some can be noticed for their cleaner books, and some are noticed for Who they choose to thank in their acknowledgements. Academically curious, I once asked one of the latter about the religion she’d crafted in her fantasy series, about the many gods in her made-up world in relation to the single One she believes is in the real one. Her answer was a bit disjointed, and it was undoubtedly because she’d never been asked that before. Characters, plot, vision for her series, but not religious portrayal. Who ever cared to notice the dichotomy between the two? And why should she not craft a world of many gods when that’s become dominant in mainstream books over the past decade, at least. On the other hand, another writer told me her memoir was rejected by a major publisher, specifically in part because she reasserted faith in G-d despite her incredibly tragic circumstances.
That’s not to say there aren’t any books from major mainstream publishers that don’t include monotheistic religion. The difference, of course, is that many books which speak of G-d aren’t usually a seamless blend of belief woven through the narrative but most often a conflict with or rejection of such beliefs.
A character who wrestles between faith and personal desire is not only realistic but highly relatable too. This sort of character can easily propel a narrative featuring intriguing internal religious struggles. But only when the character recognizes that G-d is truth and goodness, and life is a journey to such truth. Not when society has dictated that G-d must be nipped and tucked to validate current trends, wherein infinite G-d becomes a manmade god, even gods.
The scalpular removal of G-d isn’t relegated to literature, only one pillar of culture, of course, but noticeable in all aspects of society. Beyond the fights over the Ten Commandments in schools and religious commencement addresses, the demonization of religion has been so effective that any modern, grounded, “logically-minded”, “rational” individual wouldn’t dare admit to religions adherence for fear of undermining the foundation he claims to stand upon. Rather, people who will admit to higher beliefs tend to be “spiritual” and aren’t pressed to explain what on earth such a euphemism means. The braver among them will admit to believing in G-d without follow up as to what such belief mandates. Are there no actions, morals, or values that must result from such belief? Is proclamation enough without behavior to match?
The dirty truth about sole reliance on most exalted human rationale at the helm of society is that almost anything can be rationalized, the smarter the more adept at intellectual treatises for all sorts of deviances. Faith in omniscient, omnipresent, omnipotent G-d is the only guide for superseding the risks and vagaries of human intellect, as only G-d is a consistently reliable guardrail for every level of society. For it’s not law and order which make societies safe, but law and order founded in fear of G-d which succeeds. It’s not kindness that unifies societies, but kindness founded in love of G-d directing human interaction. Communities of truly G-d fearing individuals are safer not for better policing, but for better adherence to Divine morality.
Consider Apollo 8’s message beamed backed to earth when approaching the lunar sunrise, how the astronauts chose at such an awesome moment to quote from Genesis the verses of G-d’s creation of the world. Compared to all the hullabaloo of late regarding government and private space flights, can you imagine one of the recent astronauts or space tourists reciting scripture in breathless exhilaration of what incredible sights they’ve seen? Can you imagine any non-avowed religious individual invoking almighty G-d for just about anything? Now, truly religious individuals stand out in society not for their faith, but for their scarcity. There was a time when proclamations of faith was not just a political ploy, but a norm.
When Moses stood before Pharaoh in Egypt, he didn’t only say, “Let My people go.” The famous line is accurate, but only part of the sentence. More correct is, “Let My people go, so they may serve Me.”
We bring G-d back into society not with laws and public mandates, but in knowing how the sentence starts and how the sentence ends, for only then can we have a true foundation and direction for living. We bring G-d back into society when each individual decides to make it so in his own life and interactions.
Include G-d in regular conversation with verbal appreciation and notice of His guiding hand. Invite G-d back to the table with blessings and grace. Return G-d to political discourse with unambiguous reminders that rights can never be discussed without mention of capital C, Creator. And even if you claim not to care about religion and almighty G-d, send your children for religious instruction anyway, so they’ll know there’s only one true foundation for a civilized society of accomplished, achieving men. Tremble as you will at the thought, but there are worse things your child could be called, by much better people at that, than “religious.” If you trust the intellect and logic you’ve inculcated within your child, then trust them to embrace G-d too, even if you are still working at it. We’ve seen in ways subtle and obvious how the world turns when people reject traveling the path set by Him.
And if you insist that you need no religion because you have found purpose in marriage and family and service and friends, well, that’s all a rose by another name. Society insists we can pursue such meaning without Him, when these are significant and worthy because He ordained it so.
No matter what laws or devices, protests or dissertations may be devised, no matter how logical or meticulous the attempts to remove G-d or how vicious condemnation of the religious, the simple fact remains that there never was nor ever will be a world without Him. Let us embrace it and not flinch to say it is so.
https://www.eltenenbaum.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/03/The-Lie-of-True-Love.mp3THE LIE OF TRUE LOVEIn chasing the lie of “true love”, we’ve left actual values behind.Disney’s lost a lot of money. Critics, commentators, and consumers point to the woke-ification of content, including the recent fiasco of their race-swapped Snow White, who doesn’t seem to like the character, and her seven persons of non-dwarfism. The general reaction to their long string of remakes-no-one-asked-for has been a continual lowering of interest and approval. On Disney’s hundredth anniversary, Daily Wire launched Bentkey, a kid-friendly entertainment platform, which included a teaser for a live action Snow White remake. It’s plausible their version of the princess, however it’ll be told, will align with stories more familiar to Disney of old.
While the old Disney was cleaner and less overtly political, was it truly better? What exactly were old Disney stories about?
Focus on the fairy tales, the ones with charming princes and picturesque princesses, Snow White, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Belle, Little Mermaid, et al, shined and primed for happily ever after. Although there’s enough to philosophize over in terms of heroes and curses and saviors and good versus evil, consider these fairy tales’ origins. The princesses Disney built their magic kingdom upon aren’t only pulled from the Grimm brothers, as many are centuries old with variations across cultures. Unlike what Disney’s careful scrubbing would have you believe, most of these stories are not just about romance.
Old Disney may have done a good job cleaning up stories and creating a magical brand with happy promises of ever after, but they also left out a lot along the way. Ironically, previous criticisms of Disney included accusations of “princessifying” young girls and luring them with unrealistic expectations of heroic princes and perfect endings.
Consider The Little Mermaid, written by Hans Christian Andersen in 1837. Disney animated a story about a glimpse, a voice in a storm, and the transcendence of “true love” over ocean and land. Andersen, however, wrote a religious story about a glimpse, an obsession, and a mermaid desirous to be human and obtain an everlasting soul. That mermaid did not wed her prince.
Early versions of Beauty and the Beast highlight love but not the panacea of “true love” powerful enough to break curses. Central themes include goodness, kindness, and looking beyond an ugly exterior. The German Snow White wasn’t either awakened by magical “true love’s kiss” but a stumbling servant who inadvertently dislodged the piece of apple choking her. Moreover, the happy ending is overshadowed by far more powerful warnings against vanity and envy. Sleeping Beauty has differing origins from her awakening while birthing twins she was impregnated with when her rescuer raped her in her sleep to an ogress mother-in-law who wanted to eat her kids. Hardly the material happily ever after is made of.
There’s not much controversy over Disney deleting inappropriate scenes, removing the ugly and morbid to better serve a wholesome family setting. There’s no question that some parts are better left out in telling these stories to children. Yet, in doing so, what message was singled out for the foundation of the magic kingdom?
True love is timeless. True love is all you need. True love conquers all…except the divorce rate.
Remember the climactic battle at the end of Wonder Woman, when she finally, finally overcomes the villain, finding strength in the most eternal and positive belief in mankind…goodness…sacrifice? Nope, love! And Superman is mocked for his boy scout adherence to truth, justice, and the American Way. His credo may be idealistic, but it certainly provides a better compass for humanity.
Over the last several decades, the bulk of stories across formats have incessantly hammered the supposedly unimpeachable message of “true love”. Countless songs are about the power of love. Most films and stage productions include some romantic subplot, whether or not the story needs it. Romance used to be its own genre, and remains a bestselling one, but it’s since become the pumpkin spice of storytelling.
At the summit of the “true love” pile are stories about true love across generations, couples who find each other over and over again across continents and centuries. Romantic, isn’t it? Except, if we’re all just atoms floating around the universe, then which part exactly orchestrated this epic, transcendent love? Maybe it was Pluto before it was downgraded. Or an undiscovered black hole in a galaxy far, far away. Perhaps it was a glorious, unknown star, how else to star-cross lovers? Obsession with “true love” somehow makes sense of an unnamed, burnt out, gaseous fire bringing you and yours together over and over and over again.
All to say that according to a secularized worldview the highest of human achievements is “true love”. “True love” and its kiss have the power to break through any barrier, answer every question, solve every issue known to man. And not only that, but you deserve it, just because you were born.
There’s no escaping that many social issues of the day are a result of the constant drilling of this false message into our thoughts and imaginations. The way so many feel jaded by the capitalist system that didn’t facilitate their instant success, so do many think true and eternal love is merited by mere existence.
Think of the accusation, “You can’t tell me who to love.” True, a heart can’t usually be commanded by someone else, and no one’s arguing whether or not there’s a feeling of love toward someone else. If love is life’s highest achievement, then it would be right to protest that no one can hold anyone back from reaching such fulfillment.
Except, this is where Disney and the songs and stories are wrong. Because love isn’t enough. Because love isn’t always good, and can even lead to harm. Because someone can truly love someone else and still disagree with their choices. Most importantly, there’s something greater and more eternal than love, many things rather, things like respect, things called values. Unfortunately, respect is much less fun to write about and certainly doesn’t sparkle like promises of love. It was never set into the foundation of a magical kingdom, though a value is more enduring than an emotion. Unlike love, respect is more the stuff lasting relationships are made of.
Ask the question of someone married ten, twenty, fifty years, “What is love?” Will they answer, “Well, love is love.” Rather, their answer will probably center around an action requiring work, effort, and upkeep. Protest as you will, but no marriage lasts on love alone, especially if left untended.
Love is an emotion, and like all emotions it waxes and wanes. Values not emotions are everlasting and used to guide us until they were hammered to death like Pinocchio’s original Talking Cricket. Values must resume center stage, even if that means tweaking how we tell stories. With so much emphasis on “true love” over real values is it any wonder respect for others, and ourselves, was lost? It is any wonder people feel lost and betrayed when they don’t have something bigger to believe in when love lets them down?
Certainly, real and enduring love is relevant and definitely makes for a better life in its various healthy forms. Biblical teachings have plenty to say about love, but never in such deceitful terms as “true love”. There’s love for the Creator. Love between neighbors. Love as a directive which results in better treatment of others, a love hardest to achieve for the effort it demands. Love is considered worthy of focus and cultivation not because it feels good, but because an outpouring of emotion leads to an outpouring of positive, productive action plus the will to abstain from harmful, undesirable action. That’s to say, love isn’t automatic or everlasting without work. Most agree that deep, abiding love doesn’t just happen.
It’s not just wokeism that’s made stories boring but the constant harping on “true love” and all its supposedly unassailable perversions, which promote the forced normalization of lust, adultery, and pedophilia. It’s created the mindset of if “I love then I must act upon it”, without taking into account whether this love is moral or worthy of action or will harm someone else. It also doesn’t account for the fact that love does not exist in a vacuum, and that relationships only endure when both sides care for it. Love might feel good in the moment, but it’s not a reliable north star, despite what the stories would have us believe. Values like respect mandate certain actions regardless of the feels and mood of the moment. There’s a reason fairy tales don’t usually have sequels six years and three kids into the marriage.
People should not be reduced to their current love status, and stories are more interesting when they grapple with moral courage and strength of conviction. Jekyll & Hyde, The Count of Monte Cristo, To Kill a Mockingbird and the like endure for a reason. Even early iterations of the Romance genre focus on the destructive nature of lust and obsession or frame love as a path to marriage, thereby fulfilling societal and familial duty.
Old Disney created a colorful, feel-good world of magic and “true love”, which overshadowed more important morals. It may have been cleaner, but was it really better?
https://www.eltenenbaum.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Episode-Extra-36-Farewell-is-Not-the-End.mp3BONUS! Episode of Oh My Word! Podcast, also a farewell-wrap up episode.
Who know what will be, but the podcast is going on long-term hiatus. All episodes will still be available across listening platforms.
Oh My Word! began three years ago in a “basement” hideaway for pearl clutchers, and over two hundred episodes later has been honored to host all sorts of wonderful guests from across the book world.
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Heidi shares her path to publication, particularly writing under Harlequin’s Love Inspired imprint, writing inspirational romance, writing a mini series, internal conflict, and more, PLUS, a birthday surprise!
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https://www.eltenenbaum.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Episode-Extra-33-Shadow-and-Crown.mp3BONUS EPISODE! Host and author E. L. Tenenbaum goes behind the scenes of her book Shadow & Crown to talk about the story behind the story, structure, character development, and more!
Shadow & Crown is the first book in the Royal & Piper trilogy, based on the legend of the Pied Piper.
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Leia shares her journey to publication, from her early days as a blogger to writing nonfiction for adults, from a hospital ship in West Africa to a critique group in Illinois, from fostering to adopting to matching t-shirts, and more!
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Kitty shares her journey to publication, from her early days as a sportscaster to reporting hard news radio in D.C., plus starting a book club podcast for kids, her own publishing company, writing civic-minded Middle Grade mysteries, and more!
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Ana shares about becoming an audiobook reader, trying out different genres, word pronunciations, and most importantly, recording the Silhouettes audiobook!
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Derek shares his path to publishing, re-finding light and funny humor, following inspiration across genres, Stanley Kubrick, founding whimsical with his wife Sheri Fink, and more!
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Theme Music by Tim Burke www.timburketales.com
https://www.eltenenbaum.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/12/Episode-Extra-24-Kathleen-Troy.mp3BONUS! Episode featuring author Kathleen Troy!
Kathleen shares about how her father’s diagnosis led to her first manuscript, switching audiences, creating her own publishing company, and more!
Find out more about Kathleen Troy at https://www.kathleentroy.com
Listen on App/Subscribe to Oh My Word!
Episode Index
Follow @oh_my_word_podcast
Friend us on Goodreads
ALL Episode YouTube Playlist
BONUS! Episode YouTube Playlist
Theme Music by Tim Burke www.timburketales.com
https://www.eltenenbaum.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/12/Episode-Extra-23-Moni-Ritchie-Hadley.mp3BONUS! Episode featuring author Moni Ritchie Hadley!
Moni speaks about her unanticipated path to publication, approaching revisions like puzzle solving, writing art notes, trusting the process, and more!
Find out more about Moni Ritchie Hadley at https://www.moniritchie.com
Listen on App/Subscribe to Oh My Word!
Episode Index
Follow @oh_my_word_podcast
Friend us on Goodreads
ALL Episode YouTube Playlist
BONUS! Episode YouTube Playlist
Theme Music by Tim Burke www.timburketales.com
BONUS! Episode featuring author Mark Rosendorf (again)! Mark shares updates on The Witches of Vegas series, talks about writing series for new and returning readers, and more! Find out more...
BONUS! Episode featuring agent and radio show host Grace Sammon! Grace shares about founding Author Talk Network, hosting a radio show, differing approaches to academic and fiction publishing, author success,...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Ethan Gallogly! Ethan shares about his inspiration for writing his first novel, learning how to write fiction, focusing on revisions, writing like painting Monet, and more!...
BONUS! Episode featuring author and book reviewer Beth Castrodale! Beth shares her road to publication, beginning with a degree in journalism to working for a textbook company to getting published...
BONUS! Episode featuring agent Kayla Cichello! Kayla discusses her unexpected path to becoming an agent, rights and contracts, her wish list, commercial versus literary fiction, themes in picture books, and...
BONUS! Episode featuring author/illustrator Susi Schaefer! Susi shares her journey to becoming a picture book author and illustrator from painting stained glass in Austria to graphic design in the US,...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Lori Polydoros! Lori talks about how losing a writing competition was the start of it all, her love of words and language, mixing lyrical and commercial...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Claire M. Andrews! Claire shares about her path to publishing, reimagining Greek mythology, following maps, comeback genres, cliffhangers, and more! Find out more about Claire M....
BONUS! Episode featuring author Linda Rosen! Linda shares about finding her love for writing, switching from blog posts to novels, planning the right kind of research trip, book clubs, small...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Patricia Ricketts! Patricia shares about writing her debut novel, channeling creative energies, the musical aspects of words, writing from different perspectives, and more! Find out more...
BONUS! Episode featuring bestselling author Barbara Conrey! Barbara talks about becoming a USA Today Bestseller with a debut published at 70, working on craft, accepting critique-feedback, the women’s fiction genre,...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Sandra Rostirolla! Sandra shares about how she went from writing a ballet to a novel to a trilogy, tips for using maps to keep track of...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Shanti Hershenson! Shanti published her first novel at the age of twelve and she’s kept writing since! Shanti talks about her novels, interest in sci-fi, plans...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Saralyn Richard! Saralyn shares about realizing her deferred dream to write, crafting mystery, writing tips, and more! Find out more about Saralyn Richard at www.saralynrichard.com Listen...
BONUS! Episode featuring podcast writer and producer Chris “Mad Dog” Russell! Chris talks about starting his post-apocalyptic podcast, episodic writing, big questions, hearing the sounds of words, and more! Find...
BONUS! Episode featuring TV/film/visual effects producer Zach Hamelton! Zach shares about getting into “the industry,” just what post-production visual effects are, why it’s an artform, and more! Find out more...
BONUS! Episode featuring journalist, publisher and editor Ruksana Hussain! Ruksana shares about how she became a writer, switching over to travel writing, starting her own magazine, organizing content, and more!...
BONUS! Episode featuring comedian and author Brad Gosse! Brad talks about writing “picture books”, finding a niche, business models, and more! Find out more about Brad Gosse at https://bradgosse.com Listen...
BONUS! Episode featuring writer Lorna Rose! Lorna shares about getting into writing, balancing writing and homelife, turning her memoir into an essay collection, and more! Find out more about Lorna...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Ally Malinenko! Ally shares about her not-always-easy path to publication, the starting ideas for her novels, writing spooky stories for kids, and more! Find out more...
BONUS! Episode featuring founder/editor-in-chief Kolby Granville! Kolby shares about the start of his literary/philosophy/ethics magazine, what sort of stories are published, getting down to core questions which lead to thought,...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Michelle Cox! Michelle talks about writing her first novel and turning it into a series, historical fiction, hybrid publishing, and more! Find out more about Michelle...
BONUS! Episode featuring screenwriter, author, and podcaster Geoffrey D. Calhoun! Geoffrey shares about becoming a screenwriter on a bet, writing an accessible book on screenwriting, weaving in subplots, and more!...
Some trends are self-made, some trends are manufactured, but however they come about, trends affect culture and culture affects trends. As part of an ongoing, multi-episode series, we’re taking a...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Erik Bean! Erik speaks about finding bias in media, learning to assess information, how these techniques may benefit fiction writers, and more! Find out more about...
Lyrical and wonderfully written, The Girl Who Drank the Moon weaves a story relatively good to our pearls, although there are certain descriptions and themes that may not be well-suited...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Angela Ruth Strong! Angela shares about writing romance…right after her husband left, writing clean romance, adaptations, and more! Find out more about Angela Ruth Strong at...
Hairspray, here to have a good time or musical with a message? Are bright colors and upbeat songs enough to make a good musical, or does there need to be...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Syd Blue! Syd talks about writing, flying, writing about flying, adaptations, and more! Find out more about Syd Blue at https://sydblue.com Listen on App/Subscribe to Oh...
The World Between Blinks is a middle grade adventure which lands well on our pearl scales, and gets extra points for bringing in historical fiction! However, a sense of rushed...
BONUS! Episode featuring voice actor Ray Buffer! Ray talks about voice acting, recording bears, collecting golden age comic books, and more! Find out more about Ray Buffer at https://raybuffer.wixsite.com/raybuffer Listen...
Game of Thrones is a highly lauded TV adaptation of a book series of the same name, which developed a very rapt, devoted fan base. Somehow, this international hit wasn’t...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Natalie Mae! Natalie shares about becoming an author, her YA fantasy debut series, creating complex characters, and more! Find out more about Natalie Mae at https://nataliemaebooks.com...
Many people have a general idea of what happened on the western front during World War II, but what about the atrocities of the eastern front? Between Shades of Gray...
BONUS! Episode featuring editorial cartoonist Phil Hands! Phil shares about how he got into cartooning, how he thinks up ideas, the aim of editorial cartooning, and more! Find out more...
The Phantom Tollbooth is a wonderful example of a middle grade book with a perfect pearl clutching score, delightful wordplay, and a place on the shelf of classic children’s literature....
BONUS! Episode featuring literary agent Ameerah Holliday! Ameerah talks about getting into reading, what sort of stories she’s drawn to, the job of a literary agent, and more! Find out...
Looking for some mindless movie fun? Looking for something that might have significant story flaws but is more about the actor having fun than concrete world building? Then Free Guy...
BONUS! Episode featuring editor Sara Schonfeld (again)! Sara talks about how to set up physical and emotional hints and clues for payoff later in a story, plus shares classic advice...
On the surface, Whiplash is a story about a young man who wants to be one of the greatest drummers and the mentor who could help him realize his dream. Looking...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Stacia Deutsch (again)! Stacia talks about cliffhangers, story structure, writing a spinoff of a classic, beloved children’s series, and more! Find out more about Stacia Deutsch...
Encanto is a colorful Disney cultural celebration with lyrics by the renown Lin Manuel Miranda, but looking past all the brightness, does the story and music really add up? Or is...
BONUS! Episode featuring author and co-founder of A Very Important Meeting April Davila! April talks about conducting research for books from ostriches to historical fiction, leading writing meetups with meditation,...
Tall Girl, and its sequel, contains many familiar elements of teen films, but also has something going for it in its relatively light need for pearl clutching. Even so, there...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Nikki Mitchell! Nikki talks about finally taking the jump to write a book, portal magic, self-publishing, and more! Find out more about Nikki Mitchell at https://www.eleanorsliteraryadventures.com...
Some trends are self-made, some trends are manufactured, but however they come about, trends affect culture and culture affects trends. As part of an ongoing, multi-episode series, we’re taking a...
BONUS! Episode featuring literary agent Brent Taylor! Brent talks about his very early start in agenting, his love of books, awards and bestsellers, the types of stories he’s drawn to,...
Some trends are self-made, some trends are manufactured, but however they come about, trends affect culture and culture affects trends. As part of an ongoing, multi-episode series, we’re taking a...
BONUS! Episode featuring psychotherapist and writing coach Junie Swadron! Junie shares about how the gift of a diary started her writing career, the power words can have, the healing potential...
Some trends are self-made, some trends are manufactured, but however they come about, trends affect culture and culture affects trends. As part of an ongoing, multi-episode series, we’re taking a...
BONUS EPISODE! Host and author E. L. Tenenbaum goes behind the scenes of her first novel, and first duology, The Sapphire Legend, Part 1 & Part II to talk about...
Gone with the Wind is a classic of the page and the silver screen, and the very long run time of both follows a headstrong southern belle intent on making...
Why can’t the English teach their children how to speak? Why can’t a woman be more like a man? So many questions and so much to learn all from one...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Dianna Rostad! Dianna speaks about finding the right story for her debut, setting stories in the west, writing historical fiction, and more! Find out more about...
A terminally ill girl with a bucket list. A hypochondriac boy who needs to let go and live again. Good times ahead? Then Came You has a lot of elements familiar...
BONUS! Episode featuring author David Boito! David shares about exploring the world of remote control flyers, why he chose to write a book, why self-publishing, and more! Find out more...
Many books have messages, especially if you read critically and between the lines. Some preach, which is less subtle. And then there are those which try to “break barriers” and...
BONUS EPISODE! Host and author E. L. Tenenbaum goes behind the scenes of her book End of Ever After to talk about the setting, characters, and some of the choices...
Although aiming for a cute Rom-Com, and weaving in a love letter to New York City, the Netflix adaptation of Dash & Lily includes some questionable decisions about and by...
BONUS! Episode with audiobook narrator Nichole James! Nichole talks about how she got into audio books, the benefits for young readers, what her recording process is like, and more! MOST...
Stephen Sondheim was a legendary lyricist and composer, a part of the Broadway scene almost from the beginning. His work left an indelible mark on American musicals, and some that...
BONUS! Episode featuring cartoonist Leigh Rubin! Leigh shares a glimpse into the “wonderful world of Rubes,” with some thoughts on writing comedy daily, finding the humor angle, and more! Find...
We can’t say too much about this episode, because, well it’s a secret. All we can say is that this very secret episode discusses a very secret Middle Grade book...
Overall, we’re fans of musical adaptations to film, but then again, we’re never quite sure what we’re gonna get. Which is why we were so pleasantly surprised with the Netflix...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Gina Damico! Gina shares her writer origin story, her penchant for writing dark but humorous, story endings, and more! Find out more about Gina Damico at...
Catchy music, upbeat lyrics, does this a good musical make? Or do we need to examine what it’s actually saying, whether or not it means to be sending a message?...
BONUS! Episode featuring award winning and NYT bestselling author Jonathan Maberry! Jonathan shares about getting into writing, taking a wider perspective on dystopian and horror stories, spreading positivity, and so...
Sometimes a good book makes a good film, and sometimes a good film can have a star-studded cast and not incapacitate our pearl clutching scale! (Well, almost.) Moneyball, based on...
BONUS! Episode featuring bookstore book manager Mark Adam! Mark shares about working in book fairs, curating lists and titles for bookstores, and more! Listen on App/Subscribe to Oh My Word!...
Based on the book when Dimple Met Rishi by Sandhya Menon, Mismatched is a teen Rom-Com set in India, and centers around a boy who’s looking for romance and his...
Community is a zany, crazy found family comedy of the type not often seen on TV anymore. Some seasons and some episodes are better than others–some lines have even proven...
BONUS! Episode featuring picture book writer Ivy Verdin! Ivy shares about her original idea and vision for her book, her approach to self-publishing and publicity, and more! Find out more...
The DUFF (based on the book of the same name) is a teen makeover RomCom about a girl trying to step out from under the shadows of her prettier, more...
BONUS! Episode featuring literary agent Jennifer Mattson! Jennifer talks about her path to becoming an agent, stories she’s drawn to, calls with clients, and more! Find out more about Jennifer...
The historical fiction genre has become saturated with World War II settings, but at least it encourages authors to find new angles and fresh stories. This one follows a British...
BONUS! Episode featuring senior editor Krista Vitola! Krista shares about her journey to becoming an editor, some of the authors she works with, what draws her to certain stories, and...
Blood Heir was almost pulled from publication, but we’re glad it wasn’t! Although the story gets rather bloody, the slightly different setting, light romance and clean language work in its...
BONUS! Episode featuring author, editor, and humane educator Meeg Pincus! Meeg talks about getting into writing children’s nonfiction, how she finds her story ideas, what a solutionary is, and more!...
Atypical ostensibly centers around a young man on the autism spectrum who decides it’s time to assert his independence by getting a girlfriend, and then, you know. The rest of...
BONUS! Episode featuring author and podcaster Leah Stuhler! Leah talks about why she published her books, why she started the YA Book Chat podcast, why she’s drawn to YA, and...
Ann Rinaldi was a beloved author of specifically (pearl clutcher approved) American Historical Fiction for teens and young readers. More than opening portals to different times and perspectives in history,...
BONUS! Episode featuring author and school guidance counselor Mark Rosendorf! Mark shares about how he became a writer (twice!), the origins of his Rone Award Winning “Witches of Vegas” series,...
Where’s the best place to hide real magic in the real world? Las Vegas, of course! So what happens when a group of witches want to live in the real...
https://www.eltenenbaum.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/09/Episode-77.5-Chris-Cannon.mp3 BONUS! Episode featuring author Chris Cannon! Chris shares about how she became a writer, particularly for paranormal, plus shapeshifting dragons, snarky dialogue, and writing multiple series in the same...
What do Anne of Green Gables, Artemis Fowl, Miranda, Columbo, Huey Calhoun, and Shakespeare have in common? Find out in this special episode in which we each chose a standout...
BONUS! Episode featuring illustrator, writer, and character designer Tom Booth! Tom talks about becoming an illustrator, character design for the screen, and speaks about working on the highly recommended Malamander...
An origin story about the villainous President Snow from the Hunger Games, but was he born that way or did circumstances and really effective propaganda from the capital turn him...
BONUS! Episode featuring storyboard artist Chuck Grieb! Chuck shares about his various experiences, from storyboards to animation to painting to teaching to always remaining a student of art! Find out...
The Princess Bride is a novel later adapted to a movie of the same name and written by the same writer, William Goldman. Although much of it follows a standard...
BONUS EPISODE! Host and author E. L. Tenenbaum goes behind the scenes of her book Heart of a Hunter to talk about the themes, characters, and some of the choices...
Classics endure for so many reasons, but one classic of western literature which stands above the rest is The Count of Monte Cristo, not the sandwich nor a mere tale...
BONUS! Episode with voice actor and audiobook narrator Nathan Weiland! Nathan shares about becoming a voice actor, his recording process, plus a little about his ear for accents, and more!...
Disney’s live action Cinderella is certainly one of their better live action installments, plus, despite the heavy leaning on romance, the story also fleshes out more of Cinderella’s character and...
BONUS! Episode featuring cover designer Leo Nickolls! Leo shares about how he found the world of cover design, his process, color schemes, the vital import of a good cover, and...
The Amazon series Panic is based on the book of the same name by Lauren Oliver (previously seen in Episode 38: Before I Fall Again). The general idea of facing...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Candace Robinson Candace talks about getting into writing, writing series, writing with a co-author, and bringing new spins to familiar stories! Find out more about Candace...
Disney/Pixar took a trip to the Italian seaside this summer with Luca, the story of a sea monster who turns human as he breaks the surface to explore, and love,...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Natalie Lund! Natalie speaks about her path to being an author, writing about small towns and in multiple perspectives, idea sources, and more! Find out more...
Inspired by Indiana Jones, Makiia Lucier crafts a relatively clean YA maritime adventure in Isle of Blood & Stone. There’s some romance, some intrigue, some supernatural and fantastical elements, and...
BONUS! Episode featuring illustrator Shiho Pate! Shiho speaks about how she uses art to communicate, getting into children’s books, her illustrating experiences, and more! Find out more about Shiho Pate...
The Daughter of Smoke & Bone trilogy is a story of romance and angels and demons, lyrically written by Laini Taylor (see Episode 12: Muses of Strange Dreamers). However, although...
BONUS! Episode featuring writer Carlene Griffith! Carlene shares her journey to writing as it winds through acting, working with kids, founding playhouse, and her current fairy tale series. Find out...
Zac & Mia is an adaptation of a book with the same name by A. J. Betts. Although the series returns to a familiar theme of teens battling life-threatening illness,...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Thomas Taylor! Thomas Taylor is the author of the highly enjoyable and recommended Malamander series, reviewed in Episode 63: “An Eerie Review.” In this bonus episode,...
Throwback! to the film adaptation of The Princess Diaries based on the book series by Meg Cabot. Fun, silly, and a classic YA rom-com, there are still certain moments that...
BONUS! Episode featuring author Lynne Kelly! Lynne talks about how she first started writing, finding stories through unique animal facts, compassionate protagonists, singing whales, and more! Find out more about...
When Cobra Kai first aired on YouTube it seemed to be on the right track, not only in bringing back the original Karate Kid cast, but also in the overall...
BONUS! Episode and first episode with an artist and illustrator Michael Stiles! Michael talks about working in all different types of art, from lettering to galleries to conventions to illustration...
Fablehaven by Brandon Mull is another middle grade winner for us with its appropriately low pearl-clutcher ratings. PLUS it includes all the good stuff for readers in this age range,...
BONUS EPISODE! Host and author E. L. Tenenbaum takes us behind the scenes of her book Beautiful to Me to talk about the setting, characters, and some of the choices...
“Understated” is an almost understatement for Shtisel, a character-driven drama about family, love, loss, hope, and resiliency experienced by an ultra-religious family in Israel. Most important, aside from a wonderful...
BONUS! Episode with audiobook narrator Cherish Vuyovich! Cherish describes how she became a fan of audiobooks, what her recording process is like, and more! MOST important and MOST impressive, Cherish...
Sails up for an excellent, appropriately rated middle grade adventure with Herbie Lemon, Lost-and-Founder of the Grand Nautilus Hotel! Pearl Clutcher Ratings: Malamander by Thomas Taylor, Illustrated by Tom Booth...
BONUS! Episode with poet, writer, comedian, actor, director Matt Nagin! Matt talks about his writing process, particularly for poetry, including the balance of good ideas vs good energy, drafting, and...
Revisit the world of the Grishverse (see Episode 18) created by Leigh Bardugo as we discuss the Netflix adaptation of a complex, imaginative world with morally gray characters. PLUS, a...
BONUS! Episode with Senior Executive Editor Wendy Loggia! Wendy shares all about the acquisition and editing process, the myriad of things an editor must oversee, explains about imprints within larger...
A musical which inspired many others…and is getting a remake for some reason…to inspire again? West Side Story might just seem like one more Shakespeare retelling, but the story is...
BONUS! Episode with independent bookstore owner Erin Rivera! Erin talks about her impulsive buy of the Frugal Frigate, how she chooses inventory, the importance of customer feedback and reviews, the...
Our first picture book episode! And what a clever one it is, too! Most importantly, no pearls were clutched in the making of this episode…except in delight! Pearl Clutcher Ratings:...
https://www.eltenenbaum.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/Episode-59.5-Lies-of-Golden-Straw.mp3 BONUS EPISODE! Host and author E. L. Tenenbaum takes us behind the scenes of her book Lies of Golden Straw to talk about the setting, characters, and some of...
What is love? What is mercy? How far would you go for someone you loved? What lines would you cross to show a loved one mercy? Clutch your pearls with...
BONUS! Episode with actor and audio book narrator Haley Catherine! Haley talks about entering the world of audiobooks from her origins as a musical theater actor and, more recently, getting...
MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD! We have no idea why it took us so long to get around to talking about Ender’s Game by Orson Scott Card, particularly because it has a...
BONUS! Episode featuring the BONUS treat reading of a short fiction story about a quiet hero who changes a young man’s life, “Hiya, Pops” by E. L. Tenenbaum. Find out...
The Last Apprentice (so named on this side of the pond) and it’s adaptation Seventh Son is a spooky YA about a spook and his apprentice that borders on the...
BONUS! Episode with author Bracha Goetz! Bracha shares her enthusiasm for writing children’s pictures books, particularly breaking down deep, complex messages and ideas in a way that kids can enjoy....
Would you rather live a perfect, safe life…or live a life with risk and choice? Is choice dangerous if it can lead to “unfavorable” or “unpredictable” outcomes? Beyond the love...
BONUS! Episode with author Jenny Hickman! Jenny talks about her Peter Pan inspired trilogy, ageless lost boys, writing happily ever after, marketing, swag wardrobes, and more! Find out more about Jenny Hickman...
Bit of a throw back to the fan-favorite Vampire Academy (book and film adaptation) by Richelle Mead. Disclaimer: paranormal isn’t usually the genre for us, but while we appreciated some...
BONUS! Episode with literary agent Michaela Whatnall! Michaela talks about becoming a literary agent and sticking by an author, plus the fun of writing queries, finding comps, and navigating the...
“To All the Boys” & Co. provides a refreshingly upbeat, lighthearted, cutesy installation to the YA film adaption catalogue, although it’s emphasis on crushes and boyfriends, among other things, had...
BONUS! Episode with author Gretchen McNeil! Gretchen talks about her twisty path to publishing, her love for Agatha Christie novels, and her experiences with her books being adapted to film!...
Disney-Pixar scores again with the visually spectacular Coco, a more mature animated feature about the importance of family and remembering past generations. Like Soul, it somehow crosses into spiritual realm without...
BONUS! Episode with agent Alec Shane! Alec talks about his unlikely path from stuntman to literary agent, the different types of writers he works with, and what sort of stories...
Tuck in those bibs and dig in with us to Dumplin’, the Netflix adaptation of the YA novel of the same name! Pearls will be clutched, but the adaptation also offers...
BONUS! Episode with editor Sara Schonfeld! Sara talks about becoming an editor, describes just what an editor does, and shares some of the things she loves so much about stories. ...
CELEBRATE EPISODE 51! Because that’s what we do, celebrate 51 instead of 50, which is what other people do. Also, this episode is about the off-Broadway musical The Last Five...
BONUS! Episode with writer Lisa Rowe Fraustino! Lisa shares her path to becoming a children’s book writer, the changes she’s seen in the industry over the years, working on a...
We decided to expand into YA Horror with Not Even Bones, which only reminded us why we usually stay away from horror. And that doesn’t even cover all the pearls...
BONUS! Episode with Matt who ALSO has a podcast about books! Matt talks about starting his podcast “There Will Be Books”, choosing books for episodes, tackling insurmountable tbrs, and more!...
No Safe Harbour, part of the Dear Canada series from Scholastic, is another solid, educational read which once more proves why we’re such fans of the series. The terrible story...