Morning Mindset Cafe

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Welcome to Morning Mindset Cafe. I'm Charlene Burke, your host for the next few minutes. As the host of mastermind groups for small business owners, creator of the Power of 10 program for women business owners, and the 6 week program More Profits, More Success Program for all business owners, I have seen that success leaves clues and those clues are available to all who have their eyes, and minds, open to seeing them.

Today's topic comes from Success Through A Positive Mental Attitude by W. Clement Stone and Napoleon Hill. One of my all time favorite books. It illustrates, quite clearly I think, just how important our thinking is to how we feel and who we are.

If we think happy thoughts, we will be happy.
If we think miserable thoughts, we will be miserable.
If we think fear thoughts, we will be fearful.
If we think sickly thoughts, we will probably
be ill.
If we think failure, we will certainly fail.
If we wallow in self-pity, everyone will want to shun us and avoid us.

Oh my. This means that I am responsible for how I feel.

That I can change how I feel by changing what I think.

And by changing what I think I can change the direction of my actions.

Which results in my achieving my goals, finishing what I started, having the success I want in life and in business.

If we want to develop a mental attitude that will bring us peace and happiness, then we must keep it simple and doable and understand that what we think is who we are.

When we do this, we set ourselves up for success on a daily basis.

How do we do this? I recommend that that you read and meditate on the following, every day for 7 days. Then you decide if it works to change your thinking and if it sets you up for success.

JUST FOR TODAY

Just for today I will be happy. This assumes that what Abraham Lincoln said is true, that “most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” Happiness is from within; it is not a matter of externals.
Just for today I will try to adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my family, my business, and my luck as they come and fit myself to them.
Just for today I will take care of my body. I will exercise it, care for it, nourish it, not abuse nor neglect it, so that it will be a perfect machine for my bidding.
Just for today I will try to strengthen my mind. I will learn something useful. I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration.
Just for today I will exercise my soul in three ways; I will do somebody a good turn and not get found out. I will do at least two things I don’t want to do as William James suggests, just for exercise.
Just for today I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress as becomingly as possible, talk low, act courteously, be liberal with praise, criticize not at all, nor fault with anything and not try to regulate nor improve anyone.
Just for today I will try to live through this day only, not to tackle my whole life problem at once. I can do things for twelve hours that would appall me if I had to keep them up for a lifetime.
Just for today I will have a program. I will write down what I expect to do every hour. I may not follow it exactly, but I will have it. It will eliminate two pests, hurry and indecision.
Just for today I will have a quiet half hour all by myself and relax. In this half hour sometimes I will think of God, so as to get a little more perspective into my life.
Just for today I will be unafraid, especially I will not be afraid to be happy, to enjoy what is beautiful, to love, and to believe that those I love, love me.

—Written by Sybil F. Partridge and printed in How To Stop Worrying

https://searchbyburke.com
https://mindfulportal.com

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day
Comparison with others is useless. Doing this leads to jealousy, envy, greed, competition, and even hatred.

Comparison with our best, or higher self, opens the door to true advancement and healing and positions us on the road to success. Improving our personal attributes and characteristics little by little, we then incrementally climb upwards to become our higher self.
We can begin in small ways. Simple things can and do make a profound difference. Ten behaviors to consider for self-advancement are:

Talk less, listen more.
Watch less visual media, read more.
Sit less, move more.
Eat less processed foods. Enjoy more whole fruits and vegetables.
Condemn less, praise more.
Think fewer negative thoughts by intentionally replacing negative thoughts with positive ones (even if they are made up!)
Stay indoors less, go outdoors more.
Spend less time alone, more time with people.
Schedule focused daily meditation, less shotgun thinking time with scattered, unproductive thoughts.
Stop ignoring self for others, and replace with scheduled self-care.

All these items are simple, yet they have profound results.

By focusing on just a little less of what you do that makes you anxious, nervous, stressed, or even overwhelmed, you can begin to adjust your internal controls to ease up on yourself and thereby everyone else. A little goes a long way, and when we perform a little better in each category daily, we can begin to see true advancement in our character overall. Less truly becomes more when we accentuate the positive things in our life that we can control, and eliminate everything else that we allow to enter into our environment.

Strive daily to be your own best self, and soon you will see a profound difference in who you have become. ~ Judy Williamson, Napolean Hill Foundation

It's true that when I focus on what I can do and do it, good things happen. I am more confident, tend to have more positive thoughts, and I have clarity about myself and the work I am doing. Which in turn brings great work to my clients and they receive great results and outcomes from their efforts.

I can check off 6 on the list as things I do regularly. Which means I'm going to take a closer look at the other 4 and schedule them into my day.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day
Great achievement is born of a struggle.

Our strength grows out of our weakness, said Ralph Waldo Emerson. “Not until we are pricked and stung and sorely shot at, awakens the indignation which arms itself with secret forces.”

Strife and struggle can inspire you to overcome adversity and to propel yourself to real achievement. View every struggle as an opportunity for personal growth. It is the struggle itself, not the result that builds character.

If you know you are right, stay the course even though the whole world seems to be against you and everyone you know questions your judgment. When you prevail — and you eventually will if you stick to the job — they will all tell you that they knew all along you could do it. ~ Napoleon Hill

Growing a business is hard work. The struggles include:

finding a new team member

keeping the sales pipeline filled with prospects

responding to clients' needs

keeping distractions at bay

being confident of a decision that is based on 60% intuition, 40% information

adjusting to canceled appointments/canceled contracts

continuous improvement activity - operations, finances, marketing, product/service
staying on course when disaster hits

moving past non-paying customers

personal adversities - Life happens with and to loved ones

Learning from the struggle can happen quickly - I like debriefing sessions. That's when I take the time to review what occurred, note the process used to get through it, then note the areas that can be improved on. The debriefing session was learned during a disaster that hit the business a few years ago.

Learning from the struggle can take a long time. The business was close to shutting down in 2013 and by 2014 I was deep in survival mode - short term thinking that affected every aspect of the business. No real business growth happened until the end of 2015. I struggled and bumbled along the way, looking for the solution to getting out of survival mode. Came upon it in summer 2015 and by year end was entering thrive mode. Consistent, persistent, shared study of success principles focused my mind on what works and eventually the rest followed.

The struggle to learn something new, to practice, experiment, make mistakes, keep going after you think you've got it figured out - is all part of achieving the goal. Those who do it, succeed. I want to succeed, therefore I'm willing to tackle the strife and struggles as they happen.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day
Friendship recognizes faults in friends but does not speak of them.
True friendship acknowledges imperfections, accepts them as part of our individual makeup, and focuses on our positive aspects instead of expounding upon our faults.

Your friends don’t like you to comment upon their failings any more than you like them to criticize you. When your friends are discouraged or disappointed in themselves, a word of encouragement will serve much better than a sermonette.

To be the kind of friend you would like to have, be a good listener, offer advice when you are asked for it, and treasure the trust that your friends have placed in you. Praise them for their achievements and sympathize when they fall short, but avoid offering “constructive criticism” or playing devil’s advocate.

Most of us expect more from ourselves than anyone else ever would, and we are painfully aware of our shortcomings. We don’t need to be reminded of them by our friends. ~ Napoleon Hill

My first thought: yep, you're a true friend if you still like me after getting to know me :)
Then I realized that this is a clear reminder of what it takes to be a friend - and to have the kind of friends you want in your life.

I prefer having people who lift me up. Who, if they make recommendations (no criticisms needed, recommendations/suggestions welcomed) it's because they have been asked OR because they're concerned that my behavior is going to hurt me or others.

There was a time when those around me rejoiced in playing the devil's advocate, in pointing out the areas that I (and others) needed to improve upon.

Then I learned that I could choose who I have around me. And by adding these friends to my circle I have grown and am better for it - because we truly are a reflection of the people we hang around.

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\Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

Human faults are like garden weeds. They grow without cultivation and soon take over the place if they aren’t thinned out.

Habits are formed so slowly that most of us don’t realize what is happening until the habits are too strongly entrenched to be broken.

Seldom can one pattern of behavior be eliminated without replacing it with another. It has been said that nature abhors a vacuum and will always find something to fill a void.

The best way to thin out the “weeds,” or faults in your character, is to identify those traits with which you are dissatisfied and replace them with their positive counterparts. If you have a tendency to lose your temper, for example, find a replacement for your anger. Neutralize it with a positive expression or affirmation, such as, “No one can make me angry unless I let them. I will not let anyone else control my emotions.” ~ Napoleon Hill

Once I make the decision that I want to change a habit - whether it is my response to change, to types of people, to environmental things - I replace that habit with something different. I decide what I want the new habit to look like, then I focus my attention on practicing the new until it replaces the old.

I did this with my approach to public speaking. It didn't matter if I was hidden behind a PowerPoint on a webinar or actually on a stage - my physical response was anxiety, my throat closed, my heart pounded, my knees knocked, and I didn't recall my words after.
I joined Toastmasters and was a member for 3 years and that is where I learned how to prepare content, how to be on stage, how to speak from the stage. That is when I realized that it was the "before the speech" preparation that needed my attention.

Today I have a routine, a habit, that I do before I speak on a webinar, from the stage, from behind a podium. This is assuming that I've practiced the material to the point that I have it memorized and can change content as needed to suit the audience. The routing involves breathing, power poses, music (I'm Back in the Saddle Again by Aerosmith is often used). This helps me focus my attention on what is most important - meeting the audience expectations.

I've used these 'change your habit' tactics to stop smoking, to speak up when I used to walk away, to look people in the eye when I was comfortable checking out the designs in the carpet, to ask questions of instructors or successful people when I was afraid of being laughed at or rejected. And much more. I know this works and have taught others how to do this so that they, too, could gain confidence and become who they wanted to be.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

The man who dipped a chunk of ice cream in chocolate and called it Eskimo Pie made a fortune for the five seconds of imagination it took to create the idea.

We are just beginning to understand the mysterious ways in which the mind works, but successful people have long known how to use the power of creative vision to their advantage.

Many “new” ideas are really nothing more than a new combination of two well-known products or ideas. Nevertheless, great fortunes have been built upon such combinations when they are supported by a clever name and marketing campaign.

There is a definite process that you can use to tap into your imagination. In his book A Technique for Producing Ideas, James Webb Young identified five steps:

Gather the appropriate information.
Work the information over in your mind.
Incubate the idea in your subconscious.
Recognize the “Eureka!” stage when the idea is born.
Shape and develop the idea for practical application.

The technique works. Give it a try the next time you’re searching for a creative solution to an old problem. ~ Napoleon Hill

Yes, those are the steps I take when determining if an idea is worth pursuing. I have worked with many solo business owners who get stuck in the 'information gathering', or more accurately ... moving forward without the information.

Others recognize the "Eureka!" moment and then flounder ... forgetting (or not understanding or held back by fear) the value of bringing in experts to help shape and develop the idea for practical application. Many times, the excuse is "I don't want anyone stealing my idea!" Which simply means that it's important to select the right people. I know a man in my community who has a few file cabinets filled with documents and drawings, notebooks and schematics of ideas turned into inventions - but he won't go to a patent attorney or show them to investors for fear they will steal his idea(s) and leave him penniless. Yeah, well, today he is in his 70's, lives on a pension + social security, and will soon need long-term medical care. What will happen is this: he will pass away, his file cabinets will be rifled through, there will be 2 or 3 inventions created from his work and someone will make millions.

Every idea is possible. It is up to me (you) to determine if I am the one to bring it to the practical application stage. And, if I am, then it is up to me to risk bringing in others with their specialty skills & talents to make it happen.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

Money is either a good or bad influence, according to the character of the person who possesses it.

It’s true. Money has no character, no personality, no values. Its actions only reflect the desires of its owner. Money can build great hospitals and schools, or it can be gambled away or squandered on meaningless possessions. Money may build museums to house beautiful works of art, it may construct beautiful houses of worship — or it may be used to create instruments of war and destruction.

As you build your personal wealth, make sure you build your character by setting aside a portion of your income to help others. Choose a church, a charity, or a cause that you can enthusiastically support. Then give of your money and your time in support of that cause. The primary beneficiary of such noble actions is always the one who gives, not the one who receives. ~ Napoleon Hill

I always viewed money as a magnifying glass - when it accumulates it magnifies the character of whoever is receiving it.

There are a lot of very nice, very kind, very generous wealthy people in this world. I know a few of them. It's not their wealth that makes them nice, kind, and generous. It is their character. They are the ones who make sure our libraries stay open, our public television programs are produced, our children's hospitals are operating, our missions and shelters are open, and more. The last sentence - "the primary beneficiary ... is the one who gives..." says, to me, that this is the reason for their kind and generous character. They know the value of giving.

There are those who are selfish, greedy, and mean and I am happy to say that I don't know them. I've met a few and had no interest in spending time with them for they had nothing to offer me. I've watched some as they gathered their riches and I am not interested in associating with them - they have nothing of value that I want.

There are two causes that get my money, and one that also gets my attention and time. The first is local - Center for Lay Ministries offers a food pantry, emergency needs assistance, and alcohol/drug rehabilitation for women. They get my money, when asked - my time is spent with the women to teach them life skills, and in the winter my husband hunts deer and will donate 2 fully processed deer to the halfway house which almost fills their freezer.
The second is kiva.org and RedBasket.org. On Kiva I select either education or manufacturing. And, with Red Basket I do a random selection of 1 per month and donate from my 'giving allowance'.

If you are thinking that you want to give and that you only have a few dollars, I recommend that you go to either kiva.org or redbasket.org. Crowdfunding is tremendously effective and your few dollars + my few dollars + someone else's few dollars helps someone.
Now I must get back to my own wealth building activities and keep watch on my character.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

Actions, not words, are the greatest means of self-praise.
There are times when you will be asked to put yourself forward, to compete for a position or a contract, and you will have to speak about your accomplishments.

Naturally, you will want to put the best foot forward. Be certain, however, that when you do so, you are confident that honest inquiry will support what you say about yourself.
If your actions have been wise and responsible, the record will show this. Leaders in any organization are those who say, “Let’s get going. Let’s do something rather than wait around to see what happens.” When your past actions demonstrate that you are a person who accepts responsibility and shows others the way, your career and relationships will benefit you accordingly. ~ Napoleon Hill

There is no doubt that action speaks louder than words.

And yet, in the world of social media, we are bombarded with the words of those who would try to convince us that they know more, do more, are more…

than those who are actually succeeding and moving forward.

Do we know the difference? Can we see past the words?

As one who would prefer to be in the background, to let my actions speak louder than my words, I struggle with self-promotion.

What I try to do is show my successes by sharing parts of conversations with clients, reviews that clients are kind enough to give me, and examples of how I work.

As a marketer, I do more for my clients than I do for myself. And can relate to the saying "the plumber's house has leaks" or "the carpenter's house is unfinished".

And yet, in many areas I am succeeding. I am living the life I want, have a business that survived and grew through the recession, and friends and family that love me. And yes, I want more, aspire to be more, am motivated to learn, grow, and share so others can succeed. Hence, I'm still in business, still offering services and products, still here today to share with you.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day
Examine most carefully the things you desire most.

Far too many people spend more time planning their weekends than their lives. Then they suddenly realize that life has passed them by and they weren’t even aware it was happening.
When you intently study what you most desire in life, you begin to focus your mind and concentrate your energy upon that which you wish to achieve.

One of the great advantages of having a definite goal for your life is that it helps you prioritize your activities. When your major purpose is clear in your mind, it is unnecessary to analyze each individual situation. You know automatically whether your actions will move you toward your goal or away from it. You can then use all of your resources — time, money, and energy — to best advantage. ~ Napoleon Hill

Amazing things happen when I set my mind to it. There was a time I was stuck with thinking that if I focused on only one thing then I would be missing out on something else. Not anymore. Once I was able to articulate my Major Goal, Major Definite Purpose, then the momentum started. I'm almost there - achieving my Major Definite Purpose that I set for my business and for my personal growth. When I achieve it I'll find a new one

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

Offer results, not alibis.

There are many people who — perhaps with the best of intentions — make promises they somehow never get around to keeping.

These folks have usually developed a number of perfectly plausible explanations for not meeting their commitments; they have become experts at explaining away their failures.
Successful people, though, are those who accept responsibility for their lives. They know that talk is cheap; actions are all that really matter.

The world is waiting for men and women who seek the opportunity to render real service — the kind of service that lightens the burdens of their neighbors, the kind of service that 95 percent of people do not render because they do not understand it. When you provide a truly useful service, enthusiastically and in a spirit of genuine helpfulness, success will automatically follow. The world seeks out such individuals and rewards them accordingly. ~ Napoleon Hill

I know a few people that seem to have the right excuse, at the right time, every time. And, while I laugh to myself because I can count on an excuse to be thrown out, it's a bit sad, isn't it? And could be the reason they're not successful.

Another thing to consider is that The excuses often can destroy relationships--businesses and personal--more than the truth of "I forgot about that" or "I overbooked myself" or even "I didn't do it and I apologize for letting you down" can.

Don’t allow yourself to fall back on excuses. Be a person of character and integrity that follows through with their promises.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

Do your job precisely as if you were your own boss, and sooner or later you will be.
The American system of free enterprise is based upon the premise that every individual may profit in proportion to his or her labors. In today’s hectic, highly competitive, global environment, however, you may feel that you are not adequately recognized and compensated for the contribution you make.

The next time you feel overworked, underpaid, and unappreciated, remind yourself that you really are in business for yourself. Your product is you. Are you the kind of employee you would like to have if you were the boss? When you are considering a difficult decision or when you are thinking about how to avoid an unpleasant assignment, ask yourself, “If this were my company, how would I handle this situation?” When your answer is that you would take precisely the same action you are considering as an employee, you are headed for bigger and better things. You will soon be the boss. ~ Napoleon Hill

And this is precisely how I became a business owner. My thinking was focused on improving the systems and processes around me. And, yes, I admit to wanting to improve the people, too, but soon learned they were more difficult to work on than systems and processes.

A couple of the jobs I had allowed for great autonomy, so I could implement the improvements I saw were needed. The other companies I worked for were more interested in having 'worker bees' rather than independent thinkers. In all of the jobs, I was committed to doing the best work I could do. I really disliked the whining and complaining from other employees about the work they were being paid to do. My thinking was simple - "do something about it".

Back to doing your job, now, as if you owned the company. It's the attitude of doing your best regardless of how you feel about the task at hand. Let's face it, some tasks stink and while I would rather push it off to someone else, I'm the one that needs to do it. It's those times that benefit from the attitude of doing the work as if I owned the company - because I know that what I do today is a small part of the greater vision.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

Bankers often lend money on character, but seldom on reputation alone, for they have learned that not all reputations are deserved.

When considering a loan, a banker attaches great importance to three things: the borrower’s ability to repay the loan, the borrower’s credit history, and the borrower’s character.

The first two considerations can be calculated mathematically; the third requires judgment and experience. Prudent bankers have learned that persons of character are always a good risk because they take their obligations seriously while those who spend their resources on the trappings of success should be avoided at all costs.

Protect your good reputation as you would protect your home, your investments, and your life. Once shattered, a good reputation can only be regained by those who have developed the courage and willpower to persevere in the face of great odds. ~ Napoleon Hill

Just how well have you been managing your reputation? If you are a business owner, it's vital that you know what the world thinks of you and your business. The world being - your world of customers, your team members, friends, business associates, network connections (online & offline), the media and the world of people, media, networks.

As individuals, our character will help (or hurt) us as we navigate the business world. It is what drives our behavior, which is what others judge us on - and becomes our reputation.
One of the services my business provides, and has since 2008, is reputation management. Because individuals and businesses don't pay attention to what people outside of their world say or think about their business, their industry, their products, their services. Then, when an 'attack' occurs, they're surprised and frozen because they don't know how to deal with it.
The same holds true for we individuals. We have seen how vicious people on social media can be - the minute a 'controversial opinion' has been shared. Think for a moment about this: do you consider your opinions to be controversial? If not, then when you have an opportunity to step outside of your circle, your world, you need to educate yourself on how to protect your reputation - and how to rebuild it should an 'attack' occur.

In the meantime, let's keep this simple: today, your character is who you are and that is what guides your behavior. Your behavior determines your reputation - because reputation is what others think of you. Your good reputation is important enough to protect because it not only affects you, but it affects your family, friends, business associates, and customers.
So be aware of your behavior, be disciplined, hold true to your values, practice good principles of living and communicating so that you don't damage your reputation.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

If you must let someone down, be sure it isn’t the friend who helped you up when you were down.

We all have short memories. We become preoccupied with our own interests and daily cares, and it’s easy to lose track of friends.

There will always be times when you must choose between what you wish to do and what you must do. When you are faced with such decisions, make sure you always remember those true and loyal friends who were there when you needed them, and never, under any circumstances, abandon them.

When you let down a friend who helped you when you needed it most, you will not only adversely affect the friendship; you will seriously damage your own self-respect.
When you fail a friend, regardless of how heavy your own burdens may be, you also fail yourself. If you absolutely cannot do what good friends would like, find another way to make it up to them. ~ Napoleon Hill

Oh, those times I let a good friend down :( There are two instances that immediately come to mind. I've been forgiven, but truly the friendship was damaged. I hurt my friend, and in return, I've hurt myself.

Really, I felt guilty. Because I was being selfish. My friend came to me and I was too busy for them. They had been loyal, were available to help when I called them, and more. And, me? I was too busy with things that could be set aside. When I realized what I had done I went to my friend to apologize. And, while my apology was accepted, it was too little, too late. That's when I realized the magnitude of my selfishness.

Quite a growing experience. Many years later I can recall both instances with full clarity - and I'm glad! Because I don't want to hurt a friend in that way. And, I don't want to be so selfish that my wants are more important than my friends' needs.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

Decisions

We do not worry over conditions once we have reached a decision to follow a definite line of action. ~ Napoleon Hill

First I make the decision ... Do I stay or do I go? Do I want the red or the blue? Do I pursue this project or that one? Of the 5 opportunities I've just researched, which one do I choose?
Then, once the decision is made, the 'line of action' shows itself. Usually, for me, it's not a clearly defined path/line so much as a starting point that sometimes begins with "now what do I do? who do I talk to? how can I get moving on this now?" and I continue to ask questions until I get an answer. Once I get an answer, I take action.

I just went through this last week. I have the BIG IDEA. I have the FINAL RESULT IN MIND. I have taken action but it wasn't clear to me how it was going to fit with the BIG IDEA - I just knew it would. Then, last week, I made the decision to move forward with the BIG IDEA and sought answers on how I could do it. I found the answer and am currently on track to finish the first step this weekend.

Nothing feels better than knowing where you're going and why you're taking action to get there :) Small steps lead to big results. Making the decision is the first small step.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

Friendly cooperation is never any part of the Devil’s work. He is working on the other side.
The most noble human relationships are those that have been formed in a spirit of cooperation and harmony. Cooperation, in many ways, is the physical manifestation of your care and concern for your fellow man.

When you work with others in a spirit of friendly cooperation, you are conducting yourself according to the founding principles of most religions and all successful societies.
Everyone occasionally feels pangs of jealousy or envy, usually accompanied by the urge to cause problems or difficulty for those we dislike. Truly successful people have learned to restrain such urges. They know that if they concentrate upon their own objectives and help others along the way, they will eventually reach their goals. It isn’t easy to always be a friendly, cooperative person, but, in the end, you will find that it is worth the effort. ~ Napoleon Hill

What does friendly cooperation look like?

Join me and others on Firetalk on Mondays at 12 pm ET and you will see it in action.
Mutual respect. Respect for the audience. Respect for the student. Respect for the customer. You can hear it in the voices, see it as answers flow when a question is posed.
Cooperation is care and concern...in action.

I really like that Hill fully acknowledges that it's not always easy to be friendly and cooperative. It isn't for me. Envy and jealousy are truly my worst enemies and will show themselves at the most inopportune times! Thank goodness I have the discipline and ability to suppress them for the moment. Then, when I acknowledge what's going on within myself, I will often focus my attention on own goals, my own objectives so that I don't magnify these emotions by giving them too much attention.

I know that when I want to be rid of an emotion, the best way to do so is to replace it with another - and the best way to do that is by changing my thinking, which changes my actions, which then changes my emotions.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

Remember that the tone of your voice often conveys more accurately what is in your mind than do your words.

In a moment of conflict, a suggestion or compromise can salvage a threatened working relationship. A discouraged employee can be motivated again through a few carefully chosen words. In situations like these, a good manager is looking beyond an immediate situation and acting to preserve a future benefit.

But if your voice betrays your own anger, fear, or despair, that emotion, not the wisdom you offer, will be what others remember. Those who rise to the top in any organization are those who have learned to control their emotions.

When you have a leadership position, others will watch you closely for the signals you send. You must learn to manage yourself and all the ways in which you convey messages to others if you want to inspire them and demonstrate that you care about all the members of your team. ~ Napoleon Hill

I had a father who was calm, cool, collected, and with a few words could encourage, motivate, resolve conflicts with his employees. Home? Not so much. He was stoic and didn't spend much time with we kids. Today, I know it's because of the hours he put in at 'the store' and needed that time at home to recharge.

But, I saw him 'in action' with his employees. Over the years, I've been told by hundreds of employees that they loved him, he was fantastic to work for, how lucky I was to have him as a father.

He taught me that being cool, calm, collected was a good way to be. I learned, from him, that how you say it is more important than what you say.

One thing I got bullied about (and still do occasionally today) is that I don't get emotional in public. I am usually calm, cool, collected, and often called cold, uncaring. I'm thankful for my inner circle and family who know me and know better. Losing control of your emotions helps no one. Staying calm and being able to navigate the emotional situations is important - someone has to do it or it will devolve/escalate into chaos.

Whether or not I do it well is still to be determined. Which is why I continue to work on being self-aware and being conscious of what is happening around me...noting how I can be helpful, and being willing to help/guide/encourage.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

Every time you influence another person to do a better job, you benefit that person and you increase your own value.

Someone once said that no one can really motivate anyone else; all we can do is motivate ourselves and hope it catches on.

You will probably never know how much you influence others with your behavior. When you always go the extra mile, you will influence those in your circle of friends and acquaintances, your family, your co-workers, and even your bosses to do more and better than they have done before. Your value to yourself and others is greatly enhanced by your ability to influence others to be happier, more productive people. There are no salary caps or career limits for those who lead others to great heights of success. Such people are simply too valuable. ~ Napoleon Hill

I truly don't know who I influence when I am taking action. I feel blessed and fortunate when someone takes the time to tell me the positive changes they've made in their life (personal and business) - because of the influence I've had on them.

But, when it comes to motivation and motivating others I hesitate. I know my own experience of being motivated by watching someone else. As a mastermind group facilitator, I see many people going above and beyond their initial plan because of being inspired by others in the group.

I belong to a group of internet marketers, focused on the details of creating products and funnels and sales processes and businesses. When I see someone do more than they had said they would (goal: create funnel; actual: create funnel and begin marketing it and get a sale) I am motivated to do more with my own project.

It is so difficult for me to see how my actions motivate others. As I said earlier, I'm grateful when someone tells me how motivated they were through watching, listening, or working with me.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

Friends must be grown to order — not taken for granted.

Your friends will be what you make them.

If you are the kind of friend who freely gives of your time and always shows consideration for others, your friends will be generous and kind.

If you are the kind of person who takes your friends for granted, neither giving nor expecting much in return, you will attract friends who exhibit the same qualities.

In friendship, like attracts like. Assess your behavior occasionally to determine what kind of friend you are.

Are you the kind of person you would like to have as a friend?

Do you freely give more than you expect in return, or are you always asking and never giving?

Do you take the time to stay in touch, to remember friends’ special occasions?

When you become so consumed with your own interests that you forget about your friends, you are well on your way to becoming friendless ~ Napoleon Hill

The first thing I think is that my friends are a reflection of me.

I am not one to have more than 1 or 2 close friends. By close, I mean someone I will share my personal life with. Someone I want to listen to when they're down, in trouble, needing a shoulder to cry on. Someone I would drop everything for if they called and said they needed me by their side. Someone I want to celebrate, to uplift, to spend fun time with.

My husband is very different than me. He has a multitude of close friends, spends time with as often as possible, shares his life and their life. Will drop what he's doing if they call for help. And more.

Both of us understand that to have these friends it's necessary for us to stay in touch, to give with no expectation of return, to accept when they give, to share in fun things and in sad times. Social media makes it easy to keep in touch, as does personal cell phones. But, nothing takes the place of in-person meetings when it comes to friendships. We've both taken road trips to visit our friends, and our friends have done the same for us.

If you're feeling anchored by your friends, feeling held back or led to believe that your ideas, dreams, thoughts, actions are not acceptable (and yet, you harm no one with those words or actions), I recommend that you first look at why you may be attracting those sort of people - determine if there is a need for a change in your attitude, then begin work on that and begin seeking out new friends.

What do you think?

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

Faith

Faith is the element, the “chemical” which, when mixed with prayer, gives one direct communication with Infinite Intelligence.

My experience is this:

I have faith in something greater than myself, whom I call God, and that faith is based on Christian principles which provide the framework to begin my relationship with that greater power. That relationship is nurtured through prayer.

I view prayer as the question I am seeking an answer to; it's when I'm talking. I view meditation as the time to receive those answers; it's when I'm listening.

Because I am combining that faith with prayer and meditation, I often receive answers and guidance. And, I feel confident they are the right answers. When I look back on my life and my business, it is when I followed that guidance that I was most successful and pleased with the results.

I can tap into that relationship at any time of the day or night. I can ask for guidance, listen for the answer, and 'know' what I am to do next.

The struggle comes when I disagree with the guidance/answer I received. Which, of course, is fear. Now it's up to me to recognize the fear, make the decision to respond to it, and move on - sometimes I move forward, sometimes I move backward. All the time I am reminded by my friends that I am human, and that this struggle is simply a part of being human. It's my job to grow through the struggle.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

You don’t have to do more than you are paid for, but you can push yourself ahead mighty fast by doing it voluntarily.

Initiative is that exceedingly rare quality that prompts — no, impels — a person to do what ought to be done without being told. It’s also a commodity upon which the world places great value.

Initiative will immediately set you apart from the competition, whether you are an entrepreneur, a professional services provider, a corporate staffer, or an hourly worker.

Your boss, your clients, or your customers will notice you and come to depend upon you because you have shown yourself to be a person who can be counted upon always to do the right thing.

Think for yourself.

Do something because it needs doing.

Fix a problem because you now how.

Offer a solution because you have one.

Welcome a new person to the group because it's a nice thing to do.

Add an extra page to the report that explains terms your client may not have understood.
Of course, there is more.

Knowing the right thing to do comes from experience, values, awareness, confidence.
What do you think?

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Stop living in the problem, Start living in the solution.

So you’ve got a problem? That’s good! Why? Because repeated victories over your problems are the rungs on your ladder of success. With each victory you grow in wisdom, stature, and experience. You become a better, bigger, more successful person each time you meet a problem and tackle and conquer it with Positive Mental Attitude (PMA).

Stop and think about it for a moment. Do you know of a single instance where any real achievement was made in your life, or in the life of any person in history, that was not due to a problem with which the individual was faced?

We all have problems. It's because you and everything in the universe are in a constant process of change. Change is an inexorable natural law. What is important is that your success or failure to meet the challenges of change are dependent upon your mental attitude.

You can direct your thought and control your emotions, and thus regulate your attitude. You choose whether your attitude will be positive or negative. You decide whether you will affect, use, control, or harmonize with the changes in yourself and your environment. You ordain your destiny. When you meet the challenges of change with PMA, you can intelligently solve each problem with which you are confronted.

How do you meet a problem with PMA? If you know and believe the first principle element of a positive mental attitude: God is always a good God—then you can effectively use the following formula and meet your problems:

When you are faced with a problem that needs a solution, regardless of how perplexing it may be:

Ask for Divine Guidance. Ask for help in finding the right solution.
Think.
State the problem. Analyze and define it.
State to yourself enthusiastically: “that’s good!”
Ask yourself some specific questions, such as:
(a) What’s good about it?
(b) How can I turn this adversity into a seed of equivalent or greater benefit; or how can I turn this liability into a greater asset?
Keep searching for answers to these questions until you find at least one answer that can work. ~ Napoleon Hill and W. Clement Stone from Success Through a Positive Mental Attitude.

When I changed my thoughts from living in the problem: being overwhelmed, saying "this is happening...again?!?", feeling numb because it seems to be too big for me to grasp, getting caught up in the negative emotions of thinking about the problem....
to living in the solution: seeing the problem and asking "what can I do about it?"
my attitude changed. The above 6 steps work beautifully to get you to living in the solution. I admit to not having ever said that the problem, but instead I view it as a problem that needs a solution I am responsible for - hence my question "what can I do about it?" followed by an active search for the solution, which often includes going to other people, researching online, looking things up in a book, etc.

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If you don’t want your life to be “messed up,” don’t fool around with those who have messed up theirs.

It is a peculiarity of human relationships that it is virtually impossible for one individual to have a lasting positive influence upon members of a group of negative thinkers. Usually, it works the other way. You cannot maintain a positive, productive attitude if you spend all your time with negative people. Those who have wrecked their own lives (and usually blame their misfortune on others) are not the kind of people who will help you achieve success in your own life.

Choose your friends and associates carefully, and refrain from complaints about your job, your company, or any individual. Spend your time with positive, ambitious people who have a plan for their lives. You will find that their optimism is infectious. ~ Napoleon Hill

More power to the one who can stay in a group of negative thinkers and maintain their positive thoughts. My experience has been that the majority rules - if I'm surrounded my mostly positive thinkers and doers, I'll be more positive. And, that's my preference. I always tended toward the negative, toward trying to be realistic, toward being the 'Devil's Advocate' ... none of which is very helpful to moving forward.

On Facebook I've removed friends from my list, I've hidden friends so I don't see their posts (thinking that after the political season is over their posts will return to normal), and when I'm working I enable "News Feed Eradicator" so I'm not sucked into nonsense that 700+ people can (and do) post every 60 seconds.

On LinkedIn I communicate on purpose in Articles, InMails, and groups, mostly ignoring general feeds.

In life, I host a monthly lunch for a small group of women at my home. It's by invitation only and they're not invited again if they are disruptive or unwilling to participate in the discussions. And, when I attend someone else's events, if I leave feeling worse than when I arrived - I won't go back.

When it's my husband's turn to be down, I use the 'arms length' approach to detaching from his emotions but not from him. He does the same with me. Getting sucked in and reacting does no good but does cause harm by magnifying the negatives through anger, hurt feelings, arguments. We both aspire to do this every time.

These are just a few of the ways I consciously and purposefully keep the negative away.
What about you?

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If you want a job done promptly and well, get a busy person to do it. The idle one knows too many substitutes and shortcuts.

Most of us will never know our true capacity for achievement because we never challenge ourselves to perform at our best every day. This truism becomes apparent when you are presented with an opportunity that really interests you. No matter how busy you may be, somehow you will find the time to pursue it. Conversely, duties that have little appeal for you are easily postponed and eventually forgotten.

Busy people are not procrastinators. They know that life, as John David Wright once observed about business, “is like riding a bicycle. Either you keep moving, or you fall down.”
The most effective people have a sense of urgency. They set deadlines and force themselves to establish priorities. Even if your activities don’t usually require strict deadlines, set them for yourself. You will be amazed at how much you can accomplish in a short time — if that’s all the time you have. ~ Napoleon Hill

Oh goodness, I really dislike admitting that when I have very little scheduled on my calendar...very little gets done. It's easy to put off til tomorrow when I see tomorrow doesn't have much scheduled on it.

And, when I have multiple projects and deadlines and team members ... well, amazing things happen.

I think this is where a mastermind group can be of great help. The group I belong to meets 1x/month and after every meeting I have an outline of what I want to accomplish before the next meeting. I then 'chunk it down' into weekly goals so that by the time the meeting comes I'm ready to update with progress and results.

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Success is measured in many ways. Let's think about the non-financial ways we can consider ourselves successful.

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to participate in discussions about these morning mindset thoughts for the day.

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Morning Mindset Cafe is about sharing a success principle or quote and what it looks like in real life. Drink your coffee or tea, listen to the short episode, then think on it a bit and look for ways that you can put it to use in your life. Join the GROW Alliance Facebook group to meet others and share your thoughts about each episode.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheGROWAlliance/

Today's mindset thought for the day

Make Success A Habit
Planning in advance helps us reach our goals more systematically and with better results. Creating to-do lists, researching needed information, and reflecting on our progress are all valid ways to move forward. Another proven but sometimes controversial way is to put our subconscious mind on duty. By giving direct, uncomplicated orders in a positive fashion to our subconscious mind, we are in effect programming ourselves for success.

The subconscious mind is like a person standing a watch and remains on duty day and night. Our conscious mind is not capable of that rigorous work. Just consider our beating heart, our breathing, our digestion, our circulation, and numerous other things that work unconsciously while we rest or sleep. These functions are supervised by our subconscious mind and give our awake minds the time to rest and rejuvenate. Why not assign the subconscious mind the task of helping you fulfill your desires as well? It could be just the little extra push that you need to reach your goals. ~ Judy Williamson, Napoleon Hill Foundation

What did you do this morning to ensure your success for the day?
What did you do with the goals you set for 2017?
Have you begun planting the seeds of success in your mind with affirmations, visualization, list making of To Do and Done?
What do you need to know, now, to change your habits so that you can be successful in 2017?

Morning Mindset Cafe: Recent Episodes

Charlene Burke