And Sons: Recent Episodes
And Sons
Initiation and the young man’s soul. It’s a young men’s Christian podcast. And it’s a podcast on our cultural moment, post-modernity, the millennial world.
To become a great man, you have to become a good man, one day at a time. And to become a good man, you have to understand your moment. Beauty, adventure, politics, theology, psychology, and the soul, we have conversations with experts in their own terms and dive deep into topics that, if you understand them, will help you change your life. A weekly podcast.
This is it. The final AndSons podcast. In this profoundly heartfelt conversation, Sam and Blaine look back at how this podcast came to be, what this journey has meant to each of them, and how their understanding of success has shifted over the years. This episode, originally a livestream, includes past AndSons podcast guests speaking a blessing over your life. Come, raise a glass, and celebrate the hard but timely end to this amazing chapter.
How do you know when it's time to end a good thing? As the AndSons podcast nears its final episode, Sam and Blaine reveal how they knew this was the right moment to bring the series to a close. They also share how beautiful and hard it's been knowing this decision may disappoint others, facing the risk of what's next, grappling with the difference between leaving and arriving, and processing their own grief as this chapter comes to a close. Show Note: The poem excerpted at the end of this podcast is "The Journey" by David Whyte.
Blaine Eldredge introduces an episode of his new venture, The Mount Vigil Podcast. www.mountvigil.org
The AndSons podcast is drawing to a close but AndSons is NOT ending. In this conversation, Sam and Blaine share what's next for each of them. Sam reveals plans for the future print volumes of the magazine as well as a 2022 live AndSons event that will become a long-term video resource for young men. And Blaine introduces his new focus, named Mount Vigil. Completely distinct from AndSons, Mount Vigil is a platform to help men and women interpret the movements of the story of God and discover how to enter into a deep and alert experience of Jesus in this significant time. For more on Mount Vigil—including podcasts, articles, and videos—visit www.mountvigil.org
The Wild at Heart men's team recently gathered for a new mission—to share insights gleaned from the ups and downs of their twenties. To start the conversation, Sam and Blaine invited the guys over forty (John, Bart, Allen, Morgan, Alex, JD, Justin, and Barry) into the podcast studio one at a time and asked them this question: "Looking back, what do you now wish you could tell the you of your twenties"? The advice is timely and timeless. Because every man feels both overwhelmed and underqualified during this demanding season. So imagine being around a fire-pit with these men as you take in these personal, powerful stories of those who have traveled the miles, earned the scars, and, along the way, discovered what matters most.
In this listener-requested topic, Sam and Blaine enter the deep waters of how to know the will of God. Most arrive at this question through the problem of pain, the desire to make choices that please God, or seeking his seal of approval on an outcome we want. But what if something more is at play that requires us to ask additional questions? Like how do free will and the issue of evil factor into the equation? Does God have a single vision for our lives (so we better not blow it)—or is he inviting us to co-determine the future with him? Finally...if the Creator really does care enough to engage with us in both the daily and the major decisions, how do we enter into that with him?
This episode features a big announcement about what's ahead for AndSons. You'll want to find some space to be fully present for this recent live stream where Sam and Blaine share what this new season looks like for them and the future of this podcast series.
After more than 230 AndSons podcasts—that's around 14,000 minutes—on practically every topic imaginable, how could anyone distill it all down to a few main points? That was the herculean challenge given to Sam and Blaine. They accepted, and the results may surprise you. They each created a list of "3 Do's and 3 Don'ts" they felt was essential for guys in their 20s and 30s. So lean in, listen well, and do this...but not that. Show Note: Language Warning.
We live at a crazy moment in human history. The veil of modernity has fallen away and the re-spiritualization of the world is occurring. Once again, people are being drawn to the spiritual side of things. But having one's spiritual senses opened up without allegiance to Jesus and the covering of Christianity is disastrous. The good news is we can learn how to operate in this age really well. Jesus has everything we need. But we must ask him to teach us how to respond to these sorcerers, magicians, and spiritual anarchists as they reemerge from the shadows with these ancient strategies. Show Note: This is an AndSons MetaDragon Episode. Our team calls these sorts of episodes "MetaDragon" due to their meta-focus, their intensity, and because we misunderstood something our sound engineer said one day. Esoteric? A little. But now that you know, welcome to the MetaDragon.
John Eldredge joins Sam and Blaine for this episode of the recent AndSons live stream. It's no secret that humanity is hard-pressed and beat up. But if we're going to recover from the current global trauma and understand the spiritual forces in our world, we need to first realize an essential truth. As Christians, we actually live in two worlds—the natural and the spiritual. And just as amphibians can transition easily from water to land, we need to discover how to tap into the strengths of God and his kingdom right here in the natural world around us.
What do you do in seasons where the things that once brought great joy no longer seem possible? The desire is still there, but the time or perhaps the money isn't. Through the doorway of sailing and yeah, even squirrels, Sam and Blaine offer a message of serious hope. Don't ever stop pursuing what brings you joy. Even when the epic seems out of reach, there are small things you can do to turn your daydreams of the past into fuel for the future reality you desire. Show Notes: Find the four-part Wild at Heart Envy podcast series here: https://wildatheart.org/rhplay/series/podcast/envy
Certain songs have the ability to move you like nothing else, bringing you right back to key moments in life. Sometimes you choose the songs; sometimes they choose you. Either way, music's a potent mix of melody, memory, and emotion. Maybe that's why ancient epics often weren't poems or stories...but songs. In this conversation about music, Sam and Blaine share songs from the soundtracks of their lives while inviting you to remember the songs from various seasons of your own life. Show Notes: Check out the Spotify playlist with all the music featured in this podcast here: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4e4LITa7cYpxweFQx5QeuF?si=efbaa7cccf19471b
In this recent AndSons livestream, Sam and Blaine explore the high cost of ignoring our hearts. Yes, the heart is messy and complicated, but it's also the epicenter of our emotions, desires, motives, and experiences. When we become untethered from it and mask our feelings, we open the door to shame, despair, and anger. For those willing and brave enough, there is a way back to wholeheartedness. Here are some simple practices for becoming a student of the heart.
Our souls grow weary from the relentless pace of life filled with non-stop demands for more of us than we have to give. In these times it's hard to remember our treasured times with Jesus...much less how to be captivated by him. Stasi Eldredge joins Sam and Blaine with a much-needed reminder that God is in our longings. She tenderly shows how grief can intermingle with intimacy. Ways to let our hearts surface in God's care. And how important it is for us to remember who we are, who God is, and the truer story that he's telling through the messiness and beauty of our lives. Show Notes Listen to the first episode of Stasi Eldredge's new Captivated podcast series here: https://wildatheart.org/rhplay/podcast/captivated/encountering-jesus
If you struggle with anxiety, you're not alone. More than 40 million adults struggle with anxiety. It's the most common mental illness in America. But we don't really talk about it, probably because it creates a sense of shame or makes us feel like a failure. Luke Eldredge joins Sam for a conversation to address what's really going on and offer some practical things that help when anxiety hits.
In this foundational episode, Sam and Blaine are joined by trauma therapist and bestselling author Dan Allender for this candid conversation about depression and suicide. As an entry into this weighty topic, Sam shares his personal story of wrestling with depression during high school and college—and how that tied to his deep desire to be an advocate for the underdog. Just as in Sam's story, God seeks to restore what's been broken or stolen in all our lives. That hard but hopeful process begins with discovering how to name, understand, and seek help for the shame, anger, despair, depression, or even agreements with death that come against us.
A listener recently wrote in asking for a conversation on breaks-up. He was going through a difficult season after the end of a relationship and thought this topic was one most guys could benefit from. We agree. Some of you have been broken up with. Others are in an unhealthy relationship that you need to end. But even if you're single and not currently dating or you're in a marriage you're fully committed to—there's greater healing available from understanding how past relationships have wounded and shaped you. So wherever you are in your story, here it is...the break-up podcast. Show Note: The poem Blaine referenced is "Horses at Midnight Without a Moon" by Jack Gilbert. You can search and read it in full online.
We tend to measure success by what we get from God. We think our resiliency would improve if we only had what we most wanted. But the only thing that can ever truly satisfy the soul is being with God. In the second half of this series, Sam and Blaine discuss the value and the limitations of discipline and hard work, the power of partnering with Jesus in the things that overwhelm us, and an imaginative prayer exercise to experience Jesus in the moments we feel most alone and on our own.
When life requires more of us, we tend to buckle down, work hard, and get things done. But discipline alone can never create the mature, transformed man that God is after. Nor can the other extreme—a life of no discipline and resignation. Whether we shut down our hearts or numb it, we miss the very moments where we could experience more of God. What if the invitation is to enter the hard times with him...to be fathered in essential lessons and strategies we could never make happen in our own strength? In the first half of this series, Sam and Blaine reveal how the gospel forever alters the story of hard work and resilience.
What are the boundaries of your life and kingdom...and how do you protect them in a world that puts no limits on its right to overrule your time, words, and decisions? In this "back to basics" conversation, Sam and Blaine remind us that we have been given a self by God and, because of that, have the fundamental right for our will to be done in our domain and kingdom. Discover the importance and limitations of boundaries, how enforcing boundaries is an act of self-care, and ways to offer healthy respect for the boundaries of others.
We long to share meaningful experiences with others. It's in those times that we feel most seen and heard. Yet what about when there's no one to witness our victories, struggles, and eternal moments with? In the third AndSons livestream conversation, Sam and Blaine share why these longings matter even when they can't be fully met, the importance of being known—and of knowing others, and why being a witness is one of the greatest dignities we can ever offer or receive.
God gives you a choice. Do you want to spend your days in Story 1 or Story 2? Unfortunately, most choose Story 1—small stories of low risk, high control and quick answers where comfort is valued more than what God's up to. You wouldn't watch a Story 1 movie but often end up living it. AndSons podcast producer Allen Arnold joins Sam and Blaine to share his desire to stay in Story 2—a costly place of wonder, mystery, risk, adventure, and intimacy...with no guarantees other than God. Choosing that path gave him his voice back in more ways than one. And he's using it to invite others into a life of Story 2. Show Note: Allen Arnold's new book, Waves of Creativity, is available on Amazon.com
No sane person enjoys conflict. When things go wrong, we quickly try to make up and move on. While that may work for minor disagreements, it isn't nearly as helpful for long-term conflicts in marriages and close relationships. Resolving these issues requires us to slow down and see what's really going on. Sam and Blaine share stories (both the good and the bad) of ways they've dealt with long-term conflict, how to name the pain in healthy ways, and the steps of forgiveness most needed in these moments.
What is Jesus inviting you to experience more—or less of—in this season? Whatever it is, you'll never fully achieve it being 99% in. Why? Because even just 1% uncertainty leaves the door cracked to opt out when the going gets tough. You aren't called to do everything, but when something really matters, it helps to embrace the "no eject" option. To paraphrase author Annie Grace, "99% in is brutal but 100% in is a breeze". If you'd like to start feeling the wind at your back in an area you'd like breakthrough in, draw a line in the sand and be all in.
In this second AndSons livestream, Sam Jolman joins Sam and Blaine to discuss how even though life seems to be getting back to normal, we're not doing as well as we think we are. We do something replenishing and it takes forever to recover. Or we binge on what we've been longing for—and overdo it. It's like there's a hole in our buckets. But what if the outward signs of being drained, reactive, or easily irritated are telling us something essential...and the solutions are more simple than we imagine? Show Notes: Find out more about Sam Jolman and his individual & Marriage Counseling at http://www.samjolman.com. For information on future AndSons livestreams and access to custom content and gear, go to https://www.patreon.com/andsons
Your heart needs a different gear for summer—one that creates space for sabbath, play, and risk. What does that look like? Sam and Blaine offer ways to feed your soul this summer with a mix of experiences that: 1) are kind and refreshing, 2) lead to adventure, newness, and make for really good future stories, and 3) develop your capacity to dream and anticipate. Listen and see what stirs your heart. Then make time for that kind of summer.
A hyper-vigilant, high-alert life may sound wise, but all it ultimately brings is higher anxiety, depression, and exhaustion. A life of meaning, on the other hand, places a higher value on loving well rather than simply knowing more. The goal isn't endless information but true wisdom...the kind that only comes from a relationship with God. Sam and Blaine describe ways to add wonder and awe to our days, the role evidence and language play in our decisions, and how "the collapse of testimony" shapes how we see our story...and reality. Show Note: For more information regarding the sugar and fat research referenced in the podcast: https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2016/09/13/493739074/50-years-ago-sugar-industry-quietly-paid-scientists-to-point-blame-at-fat
In their second AndSons livestream, Sam and Blaine look at how today's culture encourages people to see themselves as permanent victims. Yet how does that view align with the teachings of Jesus? By his own definition, he came to heal the brokenhearted and set the captive free (Isaiah 61). And we're no longer captive once we (along with our hearts) are set free. Here's a counterintuitive look at how we can name real pain and trauma for the sake of healing without claiming those wounds as our primary identity.
Divisive topics tend to divide relationships—but they don't have to. In this series conclusion, Sam and Blaine reveal ways to lead with our hearts in an issues-infatuated culture. We may still be attacked, but we won't be destroyed. Because when we pursue forgiveness over being right, we engage Jesus in the very places we feel most opposed and isolated. And there is no safer place to be than that.
In such polarizing times, safety comes from being fully in with one side or the other on any given topic. Having your own opinion—rather than falling in line with the loudest voice—can create a sense of fear and isolation. In the first half of this two-part conversation, Sam and Blaine swap stories of feeling stuck in the middle. Show Note: The snippet featured is called "Think About It" by Flight of the Conchords
Our culture is obsessed with convenience. Fast and easy sounds great but rarely leads to growth. That's why many have taken the opposite approach, pursuing hard and inconvenient things. But choosing a life based on either extreme is likely to cause damage. The goal isn't to make life convenient or inconvenient based on a set of "auto-pilot" assumptions. It's to ask God what's needed and allow him, as Father, to initiate us as sons through each situation.
In And Sons first livestream, Sam and Blaine talk about the struggle of feeling only adequate at life while others appear to be crushing every goal in sight. It's a time where the verdict starts to come in—or so it seems— on whether you're a success or barely passing. Most feel like they don't measure up. So why try harder if your best still misses the mark? Here's an honest conversation about facing these feelings without losing hope, beating yourself up, or downgrading your future. Show Notes: For information on future AndSons live streams and access to custom content and gear, go to https://www.patreon.com/andsons.
All movies and stories aren't created equal. They tell us about the nature of reality, form how we see the world, and shape our souls in both good and bad ways. Most people embrace one of two extremes when it comes to story. They either passively consume any and all content, oblivious of how it's affecting their worldview. Or they withdraw from any stories other than those with overt Christian messages. Sam and Blaine suggest a better way—the practice of engaging story by both being aware of what we're taking in while also understanding how God speaks to us through the language of story.
No one likes to think they have blind spots. But, well, no one is immune. We've all had that moment where we thought we nailed it only to realize we somehow misread the person or situation in front of us...yet again. In this MetaDragon podcast (see show notes), Sam and Blaine offer tools to identity and resolve our blind spots when it comes to us, our families, and the world at large. It isn't about trying harder—but seeing life more accurately. Show Note: Our team has began calling these sorts of episodes "MetaDragon" due to their meta-focus, their intensity, and because we misunderstood something our sound engineer said one day. Esoteric? A little. But now you know about it, so welcome to the MetaDragon.
We miss so much in the world around us due to overfamiliarity—from the sound of a nightly train and the smell of our homes to the sky around the stars. In this AndSons MetaDragon episode (see show notes), Sam and Blaine dive into the concept of negative space. In art, this is the space between figures in a composition. Artists regularly use negative space to enhance their paintings, photographs, songs, and architecture. Yet our lives also have negative space within them—such as the distance we put around the things and people around us. Whether in art or life, the absence of something can be as or more important than the presence of something...once we understand the value of negative space. Show Note: AndSons MetaDragon Episode Our team has begun calling these sorts of episodes "MetaDragon" due to their meta-focus, their intensity, and because we misunderstood something our sound engineer said one day. Esoteric? A little. But now you know about it, so welcome to the MetaDragon.
James Arnold Taylor is the man of more than 200 voices—including Obi-Wan Kenobi, Johnny Test, The Flash, and Fred Flintstone. He's also a man who has discovered his own true voice...and enjoys helping others know and like who they are. In this far-ranging conversation, the highly acclaimed voice actor discusses pursuing what you love even when it makes no sense to those around you, the journey of finding his true father, and the power of speaking honestly—whether in the creative process or to those you love. Show Note: Find out more at JamesArnoldTaylor.com or listen to his podcast, Talking to Myself, at: https://jatactor.libsyn.com
We want a life of ease and comfort. We need the pain and discomfort of running toward the very things that make us feel incompetent or uncomfortable. Sam and Blaine address this topic through the lens of fatherhood, sharing how they're being shaped in this season of low sleep and high demand. Pressing into what feels like too much is messy. But the greater danger is succeeding at a life of ease where you never risk offering beyond your comfort zone. Change starts by inviting God into these areas of your soul that need tending—and a willingness to stop hiding and start saying "yes" to the impossible.
If we were to walk in your home, what would we conclude matters to you based on what's on your walls or in your garage? In other words, where do you spend your money and time? If that feels a bit personal, well, it's meant to. We call it the strategy of stuff. Because, as it turns out, your stuff tells a really revealing story about who you are and what you value. This is your invitation to get curious about what you choose to populate your world with—and why.
Regardless of where you grew up, it likely didn't feel like home in some ways. And that's normal. No earthly home can completely satisfy our soul's longing to belong—or compare to the eternal home God is preparing for us. Whether you felt misunderstood by those closest to you, lacked unconditional love, or had a restless rather than restful home life, this longing to belong causes us all, a times, to feel like exiles. In this MetaDragon episode, Sam and Blaine rethink what our search for home means...and why it matters so much. Show Notes: This is an AndSons MetaDragon episode. If you don't know what that means, Sam defines it in the first few minutes.
For most, the topic of tattoos sparks an immediate reaction. Whether you love 'em or hate 'em, tattoos provide an incredible entry point to the way we see the world and our bodies. It turns out the things we do with—and to—our bodies have more power than we tend to realize. And with tattoos, it's never just about ink on skin. In this conversation, Sam and Blaine talk about the spiritual dimension of tattoos (both good and bad)—as well as some practical and cultural considerations. Show Notes: This podcast reference the Wild at Heart Spiritual Warfare podcast series (https://wildatheart.org/rhplay/series/podcast/spiritual-warfare) and The Bible Project's Spiritual Beings video series (https://bibleproject.com/explore/video/intro-spiritual-beings/).
We tend to go bad directions when we're isolated. That's because we're meant to live in community rather than as castaways on our own private islands. God designed us to be relational in all areas of life...including in the things that bring us joy. Sam and Blaine offer some ways to find the communal / relational space for the craft you long to pursue with people who will protect and celebrate your passions—as well as how you can be that person for others. Because what brings you joy was never meant just for you...but for this world we're creating together.
In the January 26th podcast, Sam and Blaine invited everyone to join them for a radical experiment in joy. If you missed it, go back and listen before jumping into this one. The challenge? Commit to some daily practice for the month of February. Not out of duty—but to awaken your senses and heart. How'd those 28 days go? Sam and Blaine share their results and discuss with others how their time went pushing themselves physically, playing instruments, waking two hours earlier, taking night walks and more. What they accomplished was awesome. What they discovered about themselves and God...even more incredible.
Why is our culture so intent on wiping some words out of existence while bending the meaning of others beyond recognition? Language control is a strategy of power that tries to change the shape of reality without changing the human heart. It's an attempt to reshape the world...through words. In this MetaDragon episode (see show notes), we explore the eternal power of words, what's lost when certain words are outlawed, and what it means to "sever the word bridge". Show Notes: AndSons MetaDragon Episode Our team has begun calling these sorts of episodes “MetaDragon” due to their meta-focus, their intensity, and because we misunderstood something our sound engineer said one day. Esoteric? A little. But now you know about it, so welcome to the MetaDragon.
Our 200th podcast is one of our most uniquely profound episodes yet. It's a fusion of story and song; loss and lament. Sarah Bianchi is an incredibly creative poet, photographer, songwriter, and singer who has experienced tremendous loss. As part of her grieving process, she has created beautifully personal songs that wrestle with unanswerable questions in ways words alone can't. In her brave conversation with Sam, and Blaine she isn't afraid to linger with lament...or shy away from the unexpected intimacy she's found with God in the midst of suffering. Show Notes: Listen to Sarah's album of songs at andsonsmagazine.com/sarahbianchi. You can also find Sarah's collection of visual art, modern psalms and poetry, and contemplative prayer liturgies at https://www.artbysarahkay.com/
We all need adventure. Something that puts us into a setting that both inspires and tests us. But in the past year, when travel has been so restricted, going and doing almost anything active has been a challenge. As winter gives way to spring, Luke Eldredge and Luke Tilden join Sam and Blaine to talk about their recent adventure biking the Copper Triangle—a loop that ascends and descends three passes in the high country of the Rockies. The joy of entering into adventure together is an essential part of the masculine journey. Their story is an invitation for you to find your new adventure...and say yes to it.
Almost all men in their twenties and thirties long for a sage or two to help with the hard questions and new seasons of life. But where are these older men who have learned the secret to true courage, strength, vulnerability, and purpose? Morgan Snyder spent two decades on this quest and discovered the treasures of wholehearted masculinity from the lives of more than seventy-five sages who have gone before us. He has found the most important thing. And in this conversation with Sam and Blaine...he shares it with you.
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One of the best parts of parenting is being a friend to our kids. Yet we can sometimes get so focused on correcting them about everything, we miss the chance to connect with them about anything. Amy Dale joins Sam and Blaine to share what it looks like to be a safe place for our kids, to be fully present when they're ready to talk, and to speak life by saying "Here's what I see in you that's true" when they lose sight of who they really are.
Does the pursuit of your dreams feel like the "forever project"—one you can't quit thinking about but never quite happens? Wild at Heart team member Allen Arnold understands how we get stuck in these areas...and the ways to break free. He's spent more than two decades working with people in the area of story, dreams, and creativity. Along the way, he's discovered the exponential power of concentrated periods of creativity over what most of us do...which is spend micro moments as time permits and wonder why we never get to the finish line. Your passion project may be closer to reality than you imagine...once you know how to approach it. SHOW NOTE: Check out www.withallen.com for ways to pursue your creativity with God.
Have you gotten into a rut with your close friends? Do you tend to just watch sports together, go to the same hang-outs, or re-tell the same high school or college stories? If you want your friendships to last, you'll have to master some more difficult relational skills. Such as refusing to talk about people not in the room as well as practicing vulnerability, unselfishness, and reconciliation. It isn't hard, but it does take intention.
What one practice stirs your heart...yet you're not currently doing it? Maybe you've never believed you had time or the courage to try it. Now, imagine joining a group of like-minded people all committed to doing their "one thing" during the same window of time. That's the February Experiment for the AndSons community. Here's how it works: 1) Choose a practice that you want to try for the month of February (hey, that's only 28 days!). 2) Pick a buddy to do it with you. 3) Make it real by emailing SamandBlaine@wildatheart.org to commit to your one thing. Do so by February 1st. We'll regroup in a March podcast to see how it went. This isn't a performance-driven, self-betterment resolution. It's an invitation into 28 days of self-discovery, life, and joy. Are you in? SESSION NOTE: Email SamandBlaine@wildatheart.org to name your February Experiment commitment.
The stunning images of two-time, award-winning Northern Ireland photographer Steven Hanna has captured the imagination and praise of countless people...including Sam and Blaine. Fascinated by his unique take on nature photography, they reached out to discuss his passion, vision, and process. Steven reveals how he learned to see what most of us miss, why being outdoors makes him come alive, and the essential way light shapes everything. SHOW NOTES: To view Steven Hanna's photographs, visit https://nebofineart.co.uk/
We do our best to distance ourselves from our problems. To keep them at bay, we try to go faster. Jump to the next project or friendship. Or explain away our feelings. But eventually the pressure becomes too great and the cracks appear. This is about what happens when you stop believing the story you've been telling yourself about why you are the way you are...and begin the healing process of becoming who God made you to be.
It's the start of a new year...and all-new podcasts with Sam and Blaine. But rather than just dive in, they first share how they spent their furlough. It's a transparent look at naming and addressing the issues that surfaced from the pressure cooker of two brothers constantly working together...as well as the new frontiers that God is inviting each of them into. The result is a fresh chapter for AndSons, birthed from a time of deep healing and restoration.
2020 is pretty much a wrap. For most, that couldn't happen soon enough. But the changing of years never automatically changes us or our circumstances. If we want to like our lives more, it requires sacrifice and intention. James Baxter is the Executive Director of Exodus 90, a ministry that's taken tens of thousands of men through a 90-day ascetic program of fasting, deep communion with God, and self-denial. It's a brotherhood of ordinary men from around the world...all on a path to greater restoration and freedom. Originally recorded in 2019, this conversation reveals ancient practices that lead to more space for God—and more life.
Most of us are coming into this Christmas having experienced some mix of loss and disappointment from the strange year known as 2020. But the answer isn't to downgrade your hopes for what's still possible this season. Sam and Blaine serve up some much-needed holiday cheer and encouragement while asking a few questions that just may change how you view the past year...and this Christmas.
Picking up where last week's podcast left off, Sam and Blaine talk about Advent promises fulfilled—and those yet to come. The consumerism, stress, and distractions of this season can leave us empty and weary. But Advent counters that by reminding us that the story of Christmas isn't past tense but rather still unfolding. It is a holy season of both remembrance and anticipation. That is the hope of Advent.
It's Advent season. A time of hopeful anticipation. And yet it's hard to even say the word "hope" without simultaneously feeling the pain of deep disappointment, dreams delayed, and real loss of this year. In the first of this two-part series, originally recorded in 2019, Sam and Blaine look at how our longing for Jesus to come again opens the door for true hope.
Some storms are beyond our control. But the ones that hit hardest are often relational storms of our own making. Sam and Blaine reveal how to prevent the turbulence that often sabotages our friendships. Doing so requires us to invite God into our relationships—knowing he alone can help us choose redemption over gratification or self-interest with those that matter most. The result isn't just better relationships. It transforms our friendships into the very shelter we need to weather the chaos coming against us. In these isolating times, find new ways to strengthen your relationships and be a better friend to those in your world.
How does adversity impact our bodies and sense of worth? Luke Eldredge joins Blaine in the studio to share his story of long-term injury, the resulting shame, and eventual triumph. Discover why our bodies affect our lives rather than our lives affecting our bodies, ways to push through the "pain cave" of physical (and other) limitations, and how persistence leads to restoration.
The question isn't whether we have pain. We have plenty. It's where are we taking it and how are we medicating it? But running from the pain never works. Nor does trying to numb it. Sam and Blaine offer a better alternative. Facing it. Through real life examples, they share how it's possible to press in and grow during the hard times—not after the storm passes, but right in the eye of it. So come on, don't waste your pain.
Life can turn upside down in the blink of an eye. You receive a "mayday" phone call or need to offer help to someone experiencing trauma. Now what? Dan Allender provides simple, practical counsel on how to engage those in your world who have recently experienced trauma of some kind, suggestions of what's good to do—and not do—in those moments, and how to lovingly walk alongside them over time.
We live in a culture that demands we react to every issue right now. Answer fast. Beat the buzzer. Get the social media "like". All while we stay on the surface rather than going deep with the person or issue in front of us. But there's a better option. The Holy Spirit is here with us...to guide us. Embracing that truth will radically shift the pace and quality of our decisions. This is an invitation to slow down, stop reacting, and to be okay not knowing all the answers. From there, it's a lot easier to ask the Holy Spirit what's really going on.
In the past year, our world has been shaken in almost every conceivable manner. We have been shaken as well—with chaos coming agains our dreams, hopes, and hearts in uniquely personal ways. In this conversation, Allen Arnold—Wild at Heart team member and author of the new book Chaos Can't—reveals where chaos comes from and why our usual responses to it fall short. Discover how not to let chaos in as well as God's invitation to fill the empty, void places in your world—and within you—with light, hope, beauty, and order.
Whether written, visual, oral, or music, stories serve as mini periscopes that reveal the world around us—and within us. The best movies, novels, and television shows are more like smelling salts than sermons, awakening us to the truer version of who we are...and more importantly, who we can be. Discover both the helpful and harmful ways stories shape us...and why that matters far more than most realize.
This week, we head to Hollywood. It's where a lot of stories are brought to life. And where actor, director, and author Nathan Clarkson spends his days. He takes us behind the scenes to discuss the wild world of movies, what it means to be a good man in the midst of it, and how, as an actor, he could more easily lose himself in roles once he found his true identity. God created us with great intentionality. Because of that, we can pursue our creative desires with intention. Doing so makes for the best story of all—the one we were created to live.
We all love a good story. But rarely do we see our lives as a story. In this episode from 2017, Sam and Blaine discuss the DNA of creativity and story with Allen Arnold from the Wild at Heart team. Allen is an author and—in his former life—the publisher of more than 500 novels. Along the way, he's discovered what makes a really good story...and how we can enter into our own story with more passion and purpose once we begin to see it as a journey of discovery.
We wrap our Soul Care series with a look at what we usually try to hide—the state of our soul. Trying to figure out how our soul is doing can feel like an incredibly complicated process. Until you realize the answer is revealed through the story of your life. It's a restoration project that begins with reflection. To get you stated, Sam and Blaine share ways they are pursuing their stories...and souls.
How well do you know yourself? Odds are...not very well if you don't regularly tend to the inner needs of your heart and soul. This pursuit begins with you...but doesn't end there. Because you'll never know anyone else's heart better than you know your own—or treat their hearts with more care than you treat yours. In this podcast that originally aired in 2017, Sam and Blain serve up several unexpected ways to grow in self-knowledge through the lost art of soul care.
We live at a time where everyone strives to be seen, celebrated, and productive. Yet what if being hidden in a world where everyone else fights to be noticed is actually...a gift? Sara Hagerty, the author of Unseen, joins Sam and Blaine to discuss her journey from burn-out to being fully present—and what shifted when she finally slowed down to focus on the unnoticed areas of her life.
Your soul takes plenty of hits each day—and it doesn't just get better on its own. Time alone never heals those kind of wounds. Nor does it automatically happen through outdoor adventures or relaxing with friends. Soul care isn't hard—but it does take intention. In this first of four podcasts on the topic (originally episode 78), Sam and Blaine share some basic practices for slowing down, seeking stillness and restoring one's soul.
We rarely give ourselves permission to go any speed but fast. It feels impossible to downshift to a slower rhythm. Not now. Not with so many expectations. So we push on...only to wonder why we have so little to offer those around us and why our heart feels so numb. In this disruptive yet hopeful podcast, Sam and Blaine show what it looks like to hit pause, create space to breathe, and choose a rhythm that refuels the soul.
In this final serving of our Summer Series, Wild at Heart staffer Jamie Goudie throws you back to Episode 44. This one features an interview with Michael Cusick—counselor, lecturer, and founder of Restoring the Soul, a ministry addressing sexual addiction through deep, whole-hearted restoration. He reframes where our addictions come from and how the unexpected antidote to sexual addictions isn't more shame...but more love.
In this fifth installment of the AndSons Summer Series, Bart Hansen serves up his favorite past episode - #86 with Wookie Jones telling stories about adventure, passion, and risk. Besides having a really cool name, Wookie owns a coffee shop, collects cool motorcycles, is wildly creative, and gets paid to do what he loves by freelancing. By nature, risk is, well, risky—but you can't expect to gain a return on no risk. Wookie doesn't pretend to have all the answers, but he has discovered that a life of less regret requires more risk.
How would you feel if your high-tech smartphone was suddenly just a...phone? No apps. No Siri. No touch screen anything. Just a device to call people. Is your eye starting to twitch at the thought of it? In this installment of the AndSons summer series, Allen from the Wild at Heart team reveals his favorite past AndSons podcast. It's Episode 137 - originally titled No Smartphones for a Month. In an effort to fight the creeping, medicating, overextended presence of our smartphones, several on the team exchanged their smartphones for low-tech flip phones for thirty long days. The results tested our patience, revealed our over-dependence on the devices, and flipped our expectations going forward. It's a disruptive, freeing conversation about the ways we use our smartphones...and the ways our smartphones use us.
The focus turns to dating in this third installment of the And Sons Summer Series. Michelle Patterson from the Wild at Heart team chose Episode 85 as her favorite past And Sons podcast. In it, Sam, Blaine, and Luke share stories from their experiences in dating from high school to college to, eventually, marriage. You won't find any pat answers or formulas here - just stories offered to help you interpret the challenges and joys of dating, love, and marriage in fresh ways.
It's summer...and that means outdoor adventure, lots of ice cream, and the And Sons Summer Series. This week, Stacey Burton from the Wild at Heart team shares her favorite past And Sons podcast. Episode 58 - originally titled The Danger of the Self-Arranging Life - is a look at what happens when we believe it's up to make life work. We need to care for our joy and our hearts, but the self-arranging life isn't soul care. It's a trap that can lead to isolation, obsession, and striving.
Welcome to the AndSons Summer Series. To mix things up (and to give them some vacation time), Sam and Blaine invited six of the Wild at Heart team to select and introduce their favorite past AndSons podcasts. First up to bat is Jon Dale - and he chose episode 73 featuring Dr. Randy James from True Life Medicine in Colorado. Dr. James redefines what being well - and what being sick - really means. In the process, he reveals how our culture and Western medicine have confused us about the best ways to care for our bodies - and why true wellness always involves the mind, soul, and body.
Many of today's emerging social, political, and spiritual movements aren't actually new. Earlier iterations can be found throughout history. Sam and Blaine highlight some specific centuries-old forces expressing themselves in new ways, including: 1) Materialist vs. Supernatural and 2) Nationalism vs. Globalism. In describing these movements, they reveal how - without God - either side of a force will inevitably turn toxic or destructive.
Why can't most days be easier? We expect the occasional big storms that come. But it's the slow grind of the daily hard that wears on us most over time. Yesterday's leaky pipe. Today's flat tire. Tomorrow's unexpected bill. All men face this low-level thwarting by the enemy. Unfortunately, difficulty alone doesn't guarantee growth. Here are some new ways to interpret your hard days.
Being the dad of a girl is a radically different experience than fathering a boy. Yes, every child has their own personality. But a boy and girl also provoke the heart of a father in uniquely specific ways. Sam and Blaine share stories of being dads to their sons and daughters - as well as what this season is revealing about them as men, husbands, and fathers. It's the beautifully messy, always new, never dull adventure of being a dad.
Jonathan Tremaine Thomas is an actor, activist, pastor, producer, social entrepreneur, fifth generation “preacher’s kid”, and the grand-nephew of the legendary Civil Rights artist Dr. Nina Simone. In this timely and timeless conversation, he addresses the topic of racial justice and reconciliation through the unique lens of the gospel. He calls it Civil Righteousness and it involves four key pillars: 1) Engaging Justice, 2) Restoring Communities, 3) Mobilizing Allies, and 4) Building Bridges. Discover how God, at his core, is a healer - and what it looks like to participate in the restoration of all things in this chaotic moment in time.
We live in a polarizing time of stark opposites. The result is growing tension fueled by an odd swirling of opposition, offense, anger, and withdrawal. Sam and Blaine process what's going on behind the scenes - drawing on research and examples of why we believe certain things, how we process new information, and why true change is both more valuable and complex than we imagine.
161 I Dan Allender: Forgiveness is Freeing Dan Allender believes forgiveness must be at the forefront of our actions - especially in these fragmented times. Rather than take offense, we're invited to create peace. Doing so is a necessity and a privilege that allows the love of God to heal a world filled with hate. When we stop trying to contain, control, or manage life and others, we can start participating in the kind of reconciliation that allows us to experience union and communion with others. Discover how genuine forgiveness is the necessary soil for kindness, generosity, and play to flourish freely in our hearts and relationships.
A few reminders. The gospel transcends every human identity and tells you a few important things about the world. Like, the fact that the human heart is fallen. It’s the original problem. It is the well from which all injustice and violence pours. And there’s Satan, God’s sworn enemy, who stokes human sin. But, thanks to the work of Jesus, we have a new heart. We have power over Satan and his kingdom. We offer the restoration of all things in real time into the world. This conversation between therapist Wendell Moss and Sam Eldredge is an onramp into the issues surrounding race, trauma, and masculinity. It first ran in July 2018, but we’re queuing it up again because here at And Sons we look for orientation. We look for trustworthy sages to give us direction in real time. We think you’ll find this conversation helpful, especially as you engage it in view of your position as a friend of Jesus, participating in the restoration of the heart and the overthrow of evil, alongside Jesus, your brother and captain. The books Moss recommends at the end are: Just Mercy (Bryan Stevenson), White Awake (Daniel Hill), Roadmap to Reconciliation (Brenda Salter McNeil).
We often settle for a simple physical explanation when we're feeling down or off. So when a throbbing headache keeps you from an event of great joy, you assume it must be because you recently cut down on caffeine. Yet these simplistic diagnoses fail to account for the fact that we are beings of body, soul, and spirit - and every move in the direction of greater life will be opposed. Here are tools to better diagnose what's really going on when you sense things aren't right.
The immaterial practices that fill our days (like those endless Zoom meetings) may be productive but they don't anchor us. Numerous studies show we need regular contact with the real. When we disconnect from the physical, we do our bodies and souls great harm. Something powerful happens when we go out for a run, walk barefoot in the grass, or spend time tending our garden. It turns out, we need dirt...literally. Sam and Blaine explore why our body, mind, and soul thrives on tactile connection to the physical world.
Why is the decision to see a therapist the last resort for most of us? Sam and Blaine demystify the process by interviewing therapist Stacia Littlefield. She helps people navigate the terrain of their hearts to care for their inner places. In this conversation, Stacia sheds light on how the process works and why it leads to breakthrough. Because it's true - we all need a good therapist every now and then.
Our words hold immense power. We understand that on a relational level. But spiritually, far more is at play. Throughout scripture, God reveals how your words, thoughts, and actions can either bless or curse your health, home, and work. And it's not just what you speak or think. We receive the blessing and cursing of others, too. This conversation shines light on why words matter even more than we realize.
Our experience with alcohol varies wildly from person to person. For some, it's an occasional beer or celebratory toast. For others, it ranges from a source of relief to a secret addiction they can't break. Annie Grace, author of The Alcohol Experiment and This Naked Mind, reveals why we reach for what we reach for. She's helped countless people rethink their relationship with alcohol by replacing feelings of shame and guilt with motives of curiosity and joy.
These strange times provide countless opportunities to talk with others about the Kingdom, but religious language gets in the way. Here's a simple way forward: rather than talking about Jesus from some memorized script, just talk about your heart. Why? Because Jesus isn't abstract; he's revealed in the concrete territory of your daily life. Then, ask what these times are stirring in the person you're talking with. To hear what this sounds like, listen in on six conversations with friends sharing how this season is affecting their hearts and hopes.
We're good at doing, but we tend to question the value of pausing. This intentionally brief podcast is about a shift - from saying more to praying more. The world downplays prayer as a legitimate response to global events. But prayer is a mighty power we've been given to co-determine the future with God, and to compete for the many uncertain outcomes of this global moment. So now more than ever, let's pause. And pray.
The celebration of key events happens regularly in childhood. But then we get older and they stop. We hit a milestone dead zone where important things go unacknowledged - whether the start of a job, the birth of a child, or the loss of a dream. In fact, right now, COVID-19 has caused a full-on celebration moratorium. And the cost is real. Without celebrations, we quit trying. We feel unseen or alone as new chapters come and go with no recognition. Luke Eldredge joins Sam and Blaine for this conversation on the appeal of rituals and need for shared experiences.
How does the trained professional survive hard times? By simplifying. It is the dominant strategy of the mature through the ages: double down on first principles. But those skills don't just magically appear in the moment of need. We learn by doing. Only then can we rely on past training and muscle memory. Hard times reveal the areas where we've grown soft and need to return to basics. Who could you become if you saw this season as real-life training rather than simply waiting for life to go back to how it was?
We live in unprecedented times where scarcity and fear strike in the middle of the day and the dead of night. Yet God promises to provide and sustain us. How can we hold to the belief that God is good when circumstances shout otherwise? Hebrew scholars (and self-proclaimed nerds) Scott and Mandy unpack how Psalm 91 is our rescue once we realize what the invitation to take shelter under the shadow of the most high God really means.
When hard times hit the fan, how shaky is your foundation? The pull is often to gain control...or at least more information. But doing so causes us to miss the deeper initiation. With God, we are fundamentally safe even when nothing in our world is safe. That's because true hope never rests in things being better than they are - but in God's nature and his promise to ultimately make all things right.
What did God mean when he meant Sabbath? Most of us have no clue. Culture and tradition have made it boring and burdensome. So we shrug and settle for a nap or a beer. But something's been lost. What if God's original intent was for it to be a day of delight rather than simply a time to re-charge for Monday? Discover how to reclaim the Sabbath as a time of feasting, savoring, celebrating, and remembering what matters most.
How do you avoid losing hope? For better or worse, it's an everyday question. Answer? It may mean doing the hard thing, which is adoring God in the middle of the mess. Problem is, you can't adore a God you don't know or allow to know you. We sat down with Sara Hagerty to talk about her counterintuitive book, Adore. It's about what happens when we expose our interior life go God, create an evidence list with the attributes of God, and allow the landscape of our minds to be reclaimed by what's true. Adore is the place where the grit of your day collides with the beauty of God's presence.
Where to start? Brad Beck has flown T-38s, worked at NASA, traveled the world, been an ER doc, and that’s only half the story. And even so, he’s still great to work with. We sat down for a conversation about calling. How do you walk it out, one step at a time? How do you transition through what seem to be distinct careers? How do you get through grueling seasons? And how to you hold on to the epic once you’ve flown training fighter jets? Turns out, it all comes down to a life with God, and concrete experiences of God that shape your vision. This is a conversation for every young man who’s in the middle of it all.
It is, unfortunately, a common experience: you enter a room, and everyone else seems to belong there. But not you - you're the outsider. And then comes the impulse to get out, check out, hide. In this episode, Blaine and Sam sit down with Allen Arnold, a regular voice on the Ransomed Heart podcast, to unpack the urge to hide: where does it come from, how do you get to its root in your story, and what do you do to engage anyway. From generational norms to the silence of Adam, distrusting people to the reliability of Jesus, this is a podcast on how to take hold of God's interpretation of your story. And then you can relate through it.
What do we do when, not if, we face criticism? Often the critique has truth in it, but the internal messages that go along with it aren't the most accurate. Our culture has become a dehumanizing and critical one, but even when the criticism is nothing more than a difficult conversation, there are ways we can learn to navigate well.
An elegant tool, from a more civilized time. Wait, that's not right. A simple tool, for a cluttered time? Better.
Pursuing joy and life can feel like uphill and difficult choices in every direction. But what if joy isn't as far away as we think?
Dreams (and we mean aspirations) are difficult. They are, on the one hand, a way God tells you about your future. They are, on the other, vulnerable, sabotaged, and often unrealized. In this episode, Sam and Blaine unpack dreams. What does it mean to share part of God’s heart for creation? What does it mean to see an unrealized potential in the world no one else sees? Because dreaming is, in fact, meant to show God’s heart to the world. But, because we live in this story and not another, dreams are usually intertwined with deep pain. Sam and Blaine explore dream-care as soul-care, whole-heartedness, and the loving act that is making your dreams available to God.
FRAMING THE SEASON
- What are you doing, Jesus, in me in this season?
- What’s the theme of this season?
- What do I need to know about my role in your larger mission for this season?
- What prophetic words, images, or instructions do you want to call to mind to frame this season?
- What are you doing in my (area of concern: work, marriage, house search, job search, etc) in particular?
UNDERSTANDING THE OPPOSITION
- What warfare is set against me in this season? What strategies is the enemy employing in an attempt to undermine your work, Jesus?
- Who’s in charge (the ranking foul spirit)?
- What is set against my marriage (or area of concern from above), in particular?
- What in my flesh is vulnerable, or in the way of what you’d like to do?
- What in the World is particularly opposed to your work in this season?
TAKING HOLD OF THE PROVISION
- What is your provision in this season? What is it in you, Jesus, and in your kingdom and work, that overwhelms and envelops the opposition as I take hold of it?
- Provision for the warfare?
- Provision for the opposition of my flesh?
- Provision for the opposition of the world?
- What personal instructions to you have for me to help my alignment with you in this season?
- Anything else?
Referenced in the show: Space, Time, and Incarnation Thomas F. Torrance Deus Caritas Est by Pope Benedict Fill These Hearts by Christopher West For Sigmund Freud, nephew Edward Bernays, and marketing, PR! - A Social History of Spin by Stewart Ewan Nephesh by the Bible Project Ruach by the Bible Project
In an effort to fight the creeping, medicating, overextended presence of our smartphones, the And Sons team and four Ransomed Heart team members gave up their smartphones for a month to see what would happen.
The goal was to see if technology is really the enemy, or if we use other forms of medication in its place. It's an And Sons experiment.
The season of advent is evoking a lot of longing for us this year. It seems you can't say the word hope without feeling the pain of all the things not yet realized. There's joy to be sure, but the longing for Jesus to come again is getting to feel more like a cry for relief than any joyful carol.
"You will know them by their fruits" Matt 7:16
It's a litmus test Jesus gave us for false prophets, and yet it extends deeper than just teachings. The fruit of an action, the fruit of a train of thought, the fruit of an experience... they all tell us about the Good of the thing producing them.
Can we use the fruit and work backwards, though? When we experience inner death, sorrow, grief... can we use those as breadcrumbs to find a deeper root that is producing them, and if so, can we change what's going on beneath the surface?
Friendships are one of the deepest places of pain for just about everyone these days, it seems. How do we become the kind of men who have friendships going back 30 years? What are the rhythms that sustain and invite such things?
Put on your Hebrew hat, it’s time to tackle one of the most productive concepts in the Bible. The Image of God. No single podcast can capture all that’s intended by that phrase, so in this episode, we focus on one dimension: the role. We are, in a word, tselem. Images. Idols. We are endowed with God’s authority to rule, and we affirm God’s ultimate right to rule his creation. Sam and Blaine dive in to our human ability to draw out potentials in creation that would not be realized without our intervention, and then explore the limitations put on our authority. It’s a view of humans that is both lower and higher than our everyday western view. And it’s a view that raises that stakes: the world needs you. Wherever you rule, you are able to raise the world to its highest potential, or else deeply destroy it.
In this episode, Blaine and And Sons team member Justin Lukasavige explore our idea environment as part of a continuing conversation on human nature. The team first unpacks what it means for an idea to be accurate in its essence, explores representationalism and Aristotelian hylomorphism, and finally begins to unpack the dominant views of human nature in the west. Because most people hold one of two assumptions: either human beings are rational free agents, with a mind that is separate from the body, or human beings are products of their environment, socially constrained, in which case society is the most real thing. The team explores the limitations of both paradigms, and prepares space for an alternative vision of humanity, centered in Jesus, that accommodates the insights of the two.
131 | Worldview 101 - Learning to See, Anthropology, and the Centrality of Human Nature (Pt. 1) by And Sons
It's too easy to focus on the damage of our story. Too easy to focus on what needs healing, or whats been stolen. We all have an innate glory in the image of God that we bare, which on its own should be enough to get our attention. But there's more: we bare a unique glory all our own, and we are called to witness the glory in the lives around us.
It's a common experience: we have a breakthrough moment with God, we see miracles, we get a taste of the life we wanted, and the next week, it's gone. In this episode, Sam and Blaine unpack practices that anchor your heart to the reality of the epic. From contemplation to the ancient practice of "tending," journaling tactics to cultures of remembering, this is an episode to keep the past present.
Inside the covers of the print magazine are things that we believe are important and somehow connected to the masculine journey, if sometimes loosely. The books inside Volume 2 are a little more obvious in that aim. They also demand a little unpacking.
We're betting you are lonely. It's something we can assume is the case for pretty much everyone on the planet, but even more so for someone trying to walk with maturity in their 20's. What do we do with it? What does community look like, and even more so, what is community for?
"Do Not Be Ashamed" by Wendell Berry
You will be walking some night in the comfortable dark of your yard and suddenly a great light will shine round about you, and behind you will be a wall you never saw before. It will be clear to you suddenly that you were about to escape, and that you are guilty: you misread the complex instructions, you are not a member, you lost your card or never had one. And you will know that they have been there all along, their eyes on your letters and books, their hands in your pockets, their ears wired to your bed. Though you have done nothing shameful, they will want you to be ashamed. They will want you to kneel and weep and say you should have been like them. And once you say you are ashamed, reading the page they hold out to you, then such light as you have made in your history will leave you. They will no longer need to pursue you. You will pursue them, begging forgiveness. They will not forgive you. There is no power against them. It is only candor that is aloof from them, only an inward clarity, unashamed, that they cannot reach. Be ready. When their light has picked you out and their questions are asked, say to them: "I am not ashamed." A sure horizon will come around you. The heron will begin his evening flight from the hilltop.
Back in the studio, Blaine and Sam talk about soul care these days. What are we doing to care for ourselves, and what do we think about to orient our story?
Nathan Clarkson has spent his 20's in the world of Hollywood and has a few things to say about it. As an actor, director, and published author, Clarkson lives in the worlds of the creative and story, so we thought we'd pick his brain on what it takes and what advice he might give to a younger version of himself.
In the pursuit of inner growth we can slip into a way of thinking that justifies all pain and disappointment as initiation. And while some of the time that is just fine, the Bible is filled with examples of great men and women taking their pain, fear, frustration, and all manner of lament to God. He is not surprised by our inner lives, and he is not disappointed with our lament.
What does it look like to take our pain to him, rather than trying to hold onto it for the sake of misplaced growth?
Dave Small has spent several years in the jungles of Burma and Thailand in cooperation with the Free Burma Rangers, a group dedicated to training young men in Burma to be first responders in the continuing civil war that plagues the country. With so much exposure to danger, trauma, and true adventure, we asked Dave to talk about how such work is sustainable and what the Father is teaching him.
Leaving a town, a job, a small group can feel like freedom or failure depending on the circumstances. It'd feel a lot easier if we knew God was calling us into a new season and out from the one we've been in. What are the factors in hearing, though? How do we know when it's time to Jump Ship and when is it time to buckle down?
With the next print of And Sons in the works, Sam and Blaine reflect on the process as it's happening.
Jan Meyers Proett has spent her life listening to others tell their stories. Over the years she has learned practices that make such work sustainable, powerful, and hopeful.
We may not all be counselors, but we could all benefit from such postures.
"I know everybody says Money can't buy happiness But it could buy me a boat, it could buy me a truck to pull it It could buy me a Yeti 110 iced down with some silver bullets Yeah, and I know what they say Money can't buy everything Well, maybe so, But it could buy me a boat" -Chris Janson
Today's episode was born out of a conversation with a young man. We found the conversation was lingering on a few questions that we've asked ourselves as well:
When have we done enough healing? When have we come far enough to take a rest, to build an Ebenezer, to appreciate what God and we have done? Are we always stuck in the "next thing" when it comes to our inner world? And how do we tell the difference between good work and tinkering?
Josh Imhoff is the founder of YWAM Emerge, an organization that builds food systems around the world to reduce poverty. What that means is that Josh and his team have figured out how to build aquaponics systems in harsh environments, thereby providing food and revenue for folks in rough places.
Thing is, Josh isn’t a farmer. Or a fish expert. He’s figured it out by walking with God and taking risks most people would run from. This is an episode on making a difference by growing in union with the only One who does.
We say the Holy Spirit is our teacher. If that’s the case, it should radically inform our practices. Unfortunately, we live in a culture that trains us to react: answer the question, make a fast decision, buy, subscribe, like. Problem is, it’s hard to discern in that environment. In this episode, we explore an alternative: a question-driven relational mode. What if you didn’t have to be a pro question asker to draw out someone's heart? What if you just had to believe you didn’t know the answer? It’d be a huge relief. Sure, there are skills to refine. But at the end of the day, all we do is create an environment where the Holy Spirit can point out what he’s up to.
It started with an email: how did you guys learn to engage ancient languages and texts? That set us off on a treasure hunt. From OT to Hebrew scholars, pastors and our own lives, this is a toolkit on reading, framing, and understanding the Bible. Special thanks to Dr. Tremper Longman, Scott Morin and Mandy Nelson of Empowering Ranch, and Tim Thornton.
Want to like your life more? Here’s a guidebook to prayer, fasting, and self-denial. James Baxter is the Executive Director of Exodus 90, an organization that instructs men in a lifestyle that leads to life. Specifically, James has led (tens of) thousands of men through a 90-day ascetic practice, introducing them to fasting, deep communion with God, and brotherhood unto restoration.
It’s a movement that’s revolutionizing the way men engage spirituality, and there’s more than a little here that might just revolutionize your life.
It's said painters like painting, and writers like having written. That tends to be true. From Zadie Smith to Flannery O'Connor, Steven Pressfield to John Gardner, Annie Dillard et alia, writers know the writing life is difficult.
And, it can be broken down into actionable steps. Steps writers have used for centuries to get work done. In this episode we talk those steps: being a student of language, loving your medium, overcoming distraction, subduing your own fractious mind, building a process, surrendering the outcome. Quote from Suzanne Buffam.
Mentioned in the podcast:
Books: Annie Dillard: The Writing Life Flannery O’Connor: Mystery and Manners Steven Pressfield: The War of Art
Podcasts: Neil Gaiman - The Interview I’ve Waited 20 Years to Do (The Tim Ferriss Show #366) Zadie Smith - How to Be Free (Touré Show)
There’s no scientific consensus as to what emotions are. Depending on who you ask, there could be 8 basic emotions (Dr. Robert Plutchik), 6 (Dr. Paul Ekman) or more than 127 (Dr. Tiffany Watt Smith). It’s true that different cultures acknowledge unique emotions. But it’s also true that different cultures cultivate different concepts of self, personhood, and purpose. In this episode we bulk up on emotion words, talk about the history of emotions (the concept as such isn’t old - it goes back to 1830), and explore the composition of the heart as it feels in the world.
Chris Skaggs and John Bergquist have been collaborators for more than a decade. They've built companies, led folks into the heart, and built culture. With Soma games, they've started a video game company on a foundation of beauty and rest. That was more than intriguing to us, so we sat down to ask, how, exactly, do you build a counter-culture that makes great art?
I mean, does this really need a description? We all can worry about an anticipated season passing by without all the hoped-for pieces being realized. Sam and Blaine dive into postures that can help.
Roger W Thompson is a writer, surfer, entrepreneur and overall outdoorsman. He’s a dad, and he’s got a mobile office in a van. We reached out to Roger because his writing reveals an unusual intimacy with the American West: byways, fishing spots, bars, all that. We wanted to know: what’s it take to develop an abiding relationship with the wild? What if you don’t live near the ocean or the mountains or a river? Lucky for us, Roger has his own take on adventure. It’s not photo-worthy drama. It’s intimate attention, unto an encounter with a place and with God, and you can try that anywhere.
Well, we saw Avengers Endgame. So this podcast's got spoilers, but it gives us the opportunity to talk about heroes, heroism, and what our cultural moment is doing with the two. Buckle up for archetypes of the hero, the human heart and how to live in view of the formation of virtue.
From Faulkner: "The young man or woman writing today has forgotten the problems of the human heart in conflict with itself which alone can make good writing because only that is worth writing about, worth the agony and the sweat.
He must learn them again. He must teach himself that the basest of all things is to be afraid; and, teaching himself that, forget it forever, leaving no room in his workshop for anything but the old verities and truths of the heart, the old universal truths lacking which any story is ephemeral and doomed – love and honor and pity and pride and compassion and sacrifice. Until he does so, he labors under a curse. He writes not of love but of lust, of defeats in which nobody loses anything of value, of victories without hope and, worst of all, without pity or compassion."
Allen Arnold joins Sam and Blaine in the studio this week to talk about the presence of Chaos in our lives, and the ways that God approaches it.
Dr. Tremper Longman III is the man when it comes to ancient Near Eastern studies. Meaning, he’s written more than 30 books on the Old Testament and its world, he’s one of the main translators of the New Living Translation of the Bible, he’s consulted on numerous popular translations, and he’s spent a career helping folks understand what the heck is going on. As in, how do we develop hermeneutics, aka reading strategies? How do we read the Bible for genre? How do we read the Bible as a coherent narrative revealing a single good God?
He’s got a new book coming out on the Old Testament (Confronting Old Testament Controversies), diving in to creation accounts, divine violence, history and conquest, and sexuality. We sat down to talk a bit about it.
It’s rankled the And Sons team a while: it seems like VR presents a real threat of escaping reality, in a negative sense, but haven’t folks found ways to escape reality anyway? Sports, books, hobbies, films, dirt bikes, all that? The question is, is there a difference between escaping from reality and escaping into reality, that is, allowing a larger reality to frame your experience?
You talk about these things on a Monday morning so we sat down for a realtime conversation on the topic.
We’re supposed to live in such a way that we’re not fried, not on empty, not always reaching for last-minute soul-caffeination. We’re supposed to escape. And we do. But is it working? When you ask your friends how they’re doing, do you know anybody who rarely says “Tired”?
So. Let’s evaluate practices of medication and soul care.
In brief: we’ve got to return to human nature, to fortifying out understanding of what people are for, generally, and how they thrive, usually. And we have to have a good understanding of our season. And we’ve got to ask God - What practice, rhythm, routine would you like me to take up? This isn’t a buzz kill. You’ll like what God’s calling you to. Pardon the obvious but really. You’ll like the life God is leading you into.
Because we’re already escaping. But are we escaping in the right way, at the right times, often enough, getting the results we need? Are we experiencing goodness in our lives more often?
Also in this conversation: the staging of the Old Testament, the reader’s imagination, uncovering addiction, and some thoughts on the fact everybody medicates. It’s the soul, so it’s a wandering conversation.
Dr. Charles Stone has been a student of the brain for a dog’s age and written on neuroscience across fields. It turns out, understanding human nature, physiology included, outlines a path into practices that promote make your life better. We know: not exactly a surprise but it got us thinking. Anyway, it turns out mindfulness, or being present to God in your moment, is a Christian discipline with roots reaching back millennia. In our conversation, Dr. Stone outlined a mindfulness practice that produces practical relief like happiness, gratitude, an experience of the presence of God, empathy, etc, as well as complex stuff like cognitive reserve, new neurological defaults, and a diminished fear response.
One more thing. Get this: in a brain study on nuns, researchers found that nuns experienced Alzheimers and dementia about as often as other people. Surprise surprise. BUT: you wouldn’t know. The nuns didn’t show symptom of either. That’s because they had healthy brains, cultivated through practices like mindfulness and contemplative prayer and statio. When parts of their brains stopped working, other parts took over. It’s called having strong cognitive reserve, and the point is, take care of your brain now, and you’ll thank us later.
For our 100th episode and Sam's 30th birthday, we reflect back on what small, daily, choices made in the days can look like over time. And the reverse: to not look at a single moment and miss all the choices that led to it.
What better way to explore the mother heart of God than through the eyes and experience of a mother? Whether you are a mother, had a great mother of your own, or missed everything that was intended, there is mercy for you.
And not the "you are excused, we can move on now" mercy that gets slapped around. But deep, affirming, loving mercy from the heart of God.
Our lives are more than just the moment we are living in. They are the accumulation of billions of small moments, they are filled with weeks, months, years, decades. When we live in "the now" and forget about the trajectory of our lives we begin to make random and unhelpful decisions, but if we could see the small choices we make each day as fitting into the trajectory of our year or our decade we might make them differently.
Throw in the momentum and direction and story of your community, your town, your country, and most importantly of all... the story of Jesus, then we might make very different decisions day to day.
This is an area of maturity and balance. It takes maturity to not get lost in the now and lose the forest for the trees. But it also takes balance to not get swept up into the momentum of the culture all around you and forget that you might be called to live in a different direction.
We've been reading "Beautiful Outlaw" again and it's been surfacing some wonderful things. What is Jesus' personality like? Yes, he is kind and merciful and all those other over-used but totally true things. Is Jesus playful though?
And if he is, how does that play out on a personal, relational level? Might we learn something of him that draws us closer in and allows us to see his hand in our daily lives more often?
Aside from the intro, of course.
So we’re not going to do a series on drinking, swearing and smoking, but we are interested in talking about right action—how do we decide what to do? The word profanity comes from pro-fanum, Latin, literally meaning “before the temple.” The implications are not sacred, outside the sacred, etc. It’s interesting though that God doesn’t identify as sacred. God is holy. That’s a whole different animal. In this episode, we explore a set of related concepts. First, we talk about the human inclination to destruction as revealed in three Old Testament words: khata, pesha, and avon (not English words, btw). Khata is sin, i.e. moral failure, self deception and the devouring self. Pesha is broken trust. Avon is iniquity, or crookedness, and the consequences of human failure everybody’d live with if Jesus hadn’t come.
Then we talk about transformation. Jesus is all about the restoration of the human heart. It’s what Moses predicts in Deuteronomy (30, we need a circumcision of heart), what the Psalms ask for (Psalm 51, for example), the Proverbs enjoin (4:23), and the prophets Ezekiel (36) and Jeremiah (31) and Isaiah (61) and yup, others anticipate God doing. In fact, in one of the passages folks reference in regard to profanity (Eph 4:29), Paul instructs the church not to let any unwholesome/corrupt/useless/un-life-giving talk come out of your mouth. The word is sapros, and it’s the same word Jesus uses when he says that you’ll know a tree by its fruit. “Every good tree bears good fruit, but the bad (sapron) tree bears bad fruit” (Matt 7:17). What you produce comes out of who you are. This is the ultimate lesson of right action: become a transformed person (by receiving what Jesus has done and becoming his disciple) and the fruit of your life with change.
This podcast episode began percolating when we received several emails from different listeners, all of whom were asking the same question: how do you create a family culture that loves reading?
Our love begins with enjoyment of story. To be able to enjoy the Gospel, theology, the sciences, the classics... it all begins with our love of story. Our very lives are a story, and we will not see the story unfolding all around us if we have missed learning to love the most simple of stories.
Fairy tales may have more to teach us about ourselves and reality than you may have guessed.
We want more of God. More intimacy. More miracles. More clarity. More play. More joy. It turns out Jesus has outlined disciplines as avenues into the life we want. Generosity—regular, radical giving—is one such discipline. In this episode we explore what it takes to become generous. It starts, like so many things, with knowing God as Mother and Father. The Father who tells you your crisis in not a problem. The Mother who tells you your needs are seen, and you will be satisfied. We are made to resource our life in God. When we don’t, generosity is a rough target.
From there we move on to the nature of the discipline: the way God intervenes to rescue a person from isolation. That’s what giving is, after all: separating ourselves from our stuff in favor of satisfaction. It includes money, and it’s more than money. Whether your tight fisted, like we’ve been, or the world’s champion tither, there is a path forward into joy, and it’s rich and storied and, it must be said, more than a little nerve-wracking.
Many of our conversations with friends have been around the subject of the cost of "really" following God. There is a sort of understanding that we are not completely there yet, and to take the leap to full-fledged followers would usher in a high cost.
Yet, as Peter said, "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life."
Brian Dreher is one of four Senior Terrestrial Biologist's in the state of Colorado. He got his masters studying bears. He's also an avid bowhunter. Enough said, right?
Brian and Morgan have been longtime friends thanks to a shared passion of the wilderness, hunting, and conservation. Brian lives in a space between the interest groups of politicians with agendas, hunters and recreation enthusiast who want to maximize opportunities, and the care for the land and the animals so the resources thrive over time. That friendship, and that position, is what initiated our conversation today.
Back in the fall I (Blaine here) started building a mini barn in my backyard. Doing so dismantled a great many misconceptions I held about building and craftsmanship, like how good I was at it, and what it would be like. Example: I assumed craft would be contemplative and monastic, but it turns out that’s only true if you already have a contemplative and monastic disposition. To talk this through, we asked builder and finish carpenter and longtime craftsman Greg Winters to come into the studio and explain the soul of the craftsman.
This isn’t just about learning to make certain cuts. It’s learning work through failure, to focus, to live in the present. It’s learning to step back from a project and let the mind come to rest. Most of all, it’s developing the ability to reach out for the Father in the places he’s expressing himself. Carpentry resists isolation. And that’s a good thing. It’s an opportunity to learn the life of a son.
“Two things I ask of you, Lord; do not refuse me before I die: Keep falsehood and lies far from me; give me neither poverty nor riches, but give me only my daily bread.”
Yup. The Proverbs say some things about wealth and power we rarely say or pray. In this episode, we dive in to desire: what is worth wanting? Which is another way of saying, what nourishes the human soul? Because it doesn’t seem to be power, that is, wealth, success or influence, even though I (Blaine) spend a lot time thinking about how to get those things. Instead, the wisdom of the ages advocate for righteousness, a concept translated in the New Testament as eudaimonia, or flourishing. That’s all well and good, but we’d like to know, how does someone actually want righteousness? What’s it look like? And, maybe most importantly, how does it interact with the world’s concept of power? The answers are out there, folks, from wanting wisdom to asking for a God-listening heart. We’ve got a ways to go, but dismantling misleading aspirations is a good place to start.
“If your life with God doesn’t have a regular dose of adventure,” Padre says, “It’s not going to sustain the masculine soul.”
That’s all well and good, but what if you live in the city? What if you have young kids? What if any one of a hundred what-ifs make adventure difficult? To answer that question, we snagged Bart Hansen, of the Ransomed Heart team. Bart has built rockets, parasails, and airplanes, flown all over the west, and done some of the craziest things we’ve ever heard. But it turns out none of those things define his life of adventure. Nope. Instead, Bart uses three categories to explore adventure as it relates to the life of the heart: Casual, Crucial and Epic Adventure.
Casual adventures are everyday outings. Crucial adventures involve the maturation of the soul. Epic adventures hinge upon the risk of love.
It turns out we need all three. From swim training in a snow storm to pursuing irritating neighbors to loving the woman in your life, this is an episode everyone needs.
We've touched on learning before, and this isn't a repeat episode. Recently a young man asked us how we learn things, as in, how we gain skills or information that actually effects our daily lives. Which is really the point of all that information out there, isn't it?
Here's the excerpt from the poem by Edna St. Vincent Millay from the episode:
"Upon this gifted age, in its dark hour, Rains from the sky a meteoric shower Of facts . . . they lie unquestioned, uncombined. Wisdom enough to leech us of our ill Is daily spun, but there exists no loom To weave it into fabric."
Our identities are shaped by our stories, by the messages we receive from those around us, and by the scripts we seem doomed to live out. But out identity as we know it may not be who we really, truly, are.
What we speak over others and over ourselves has immense power, and so much more so when we speak statements of identity. What are the statements you believe about yourself? What if you could exchange your script for a new, better, more hopeful one?
What if everyone you knew said, "I trust you"? What would you live like then?
Wookie is a designer, coffee shop owner, New Hampshire-based motorcycle rider. He’s a fascinating young dude with a penchant for risk and plenty of insight into which scooter to buy. We roped him in for a few reasons. When you see a guy who owns a coffee shop, works freelance, and maintains a stable of sweet bikes, its hard to imagine how all that happened.
We wanted to know the story.
What would the established freelancer tell the young freelancer? How do you manage risk when you have so many irons in the fire? And how do you keep your love of motorcycles alive when you’ve got a wife and house and kids? As Wookie admits, the story is messy, but there are always takeaways, and the lessons are invaluable.
Sam, Blaine, and Luke sit down to tell some stories from their experiences in dating from high school, into college, and eventually into marriage. This is not meant to be the official posture of And Sons on dating, but a round table where other's stories and experiences can help by way of understanding our own stories. What are the messages your story with dating is telling you, and what are the agreements you might be making over your future?
The reference for the purity movement mentioned in the episode is from a lecture at Fuller, but the source is work by Dr. Tina Schermer Sellers. Her book is "Sex, God, and the Conservative Church". This episode is not about Dr. Sellers book, nor was the conversation guided by it.
It’s Advent, folks. The beginning of the year. The reorientation to our revolution. Sure, advent is a time of preparation, too, but it’s also a time of doubling down on our story, of circling up to raise a glass to the Kingdom of God and remind ourselves of the urgency of our hour. It’s hard to say it better than folks have said it for centuries - “When the Church celebrates the liturgy of Advent each year, she makes present this ancient expectancy of the Messiah, for by sharing in the long preparation for the Savior’s first coming, the faithful renew their ardent desire for his second coming…the Church unites herself to his desire.”
What are you hoping for? What are you thinking about on a daily basis that brings expectation and anticipation? We all know the story of the Christian hope, it's on t-shirts and tattoos and hallmark cards. How often are we framing our days based on it though, and how often is the world's version taking over?
In this episode, we flip the script. Aaron McHugh, of Work Life Play, interviews the And Sons team (Sam and Blaine) to talk about creative work. How does And Sons keep moving dreams down the field and projects out the door? In brief, years of trial and error. But there’s more to it than that. From the personal challenges of work to basic creative habits, this is an episode on how to ship. Here’ the copy from Work Life Play:
Today’s interview is with Blaine and Sam Eldredge with And Son’s Magazine. We talk about their eight-year dream of creating a print magazine, the power of transformation v.s. entertainment, masculinity as a lens by which we can view everything else, in defense of millennials, the joy of words, vulnerability and going first, the temptation to quit, brotherhood and hearing God’s voice.
Love Work Life Play? Find Aaron McHugh over at aaronmchugh.com, and subscribe to the Work Life Play podcast wherever you get your podcasts.
If the data can be trusted, we’ll all find ourselves job searching, more than once, in our 20s (and 30s too). In this episode, we brought in Luke from a long-term undercover assignment job-searching to get a tactical download. Like, what job-searching sites are statistically reliable? How do you beat candidate-filtering algorithms? What’s a decent application/interview ratio? It’s all pretty darn helpful. Not jobless? Doesn’t matter. We dig in to keeping the heart alive in off seasons, the meaning of work, and how work relates to a vocation over time. Oh, by the way, And Sons is a print magazine. Haven’t subscribed? Get on over to andsonsmagazine.com/print and join the tribe.
Two things are given in human experience. Birth and death. Our culture doesn’t spend much time thinking about either one. And neither, to be honest, do we. Not until we have to. Which is a problem. If there were two events framing every human life you’d think we’d spend the necessary time to understand them. In this episode, we roped in midwife/writer Kim Osterholzer to map out the territory. This isn’t health class. There’s no test at the end. In this episode, we ask more about the nature and meaning of birth than the way its done, the things people should know about it, and why it matters. It’s a revelatory talk. As men, it’s vital that we make ourselves students of the feminine soul. Birth is, after all, God’s plan for populating eternity with his image. It’s a space that reveals the power of the feminine soul to create the future, in relationship, and it turns out men have a role. Wild stuff.
Here at And Sons there’s one question we get more than any other: How do I build conversational intimacy with God? Meaning normal, practical, chatty relationship. Hearing God is the basis for the rest of the Christian life. So of course we roped in John Eldredge to riff on steps to hearing His voice. From new categories for listening (playfulness, kindness) to basic relational skills (stress-free conversation, seeking confirmation) to stories from the field, this is one we’ll return to ourselves.
Books and seminars and conferences and counselors and lifetimes are spent on this subject, and rightly so. But the truth is, knowing that we need to care for our souls, to seek stillness, and to be active about our healing is one thing, actually doing something about it is quite another. Sam and Blaine offer a few simple practices that they use to care for their souls, intentionally, because the alternative is a lifetime of neglect.
We roped in And Sons strategist Jon Dale to riff on a growing concern. It’s education. Problem is, when most folks think of education, they think of mining textbooks for answers other people already know, taking multiple choice tests and reading dusty books, all because they have to. In short, we think of the system designed to make industrial workers for a world that doesn’t want industrial workers any more. In this episode, we discuss the alternative: how to love problem solving, how to fail, and how to love of the unknown. If you grew up (like we did) in a public education system that, however well-intentioned, remains rife with problems, it’s not too late to start learning.
When it comes to our daily rhythms, we tend to drift into paths with less resistance and difficulty than others. Life is hard enough as it is, so why wouldn't we choose to ease off where we can? The problem is that that posture can bleed into every aspect of our lives, until we avoid anything that seems too difficult or like too much work. Sam and Blaine share about places they are choosing difficult things for the sake of life, their families, and God.
Strategy is an abused word for a vital concept. In this episode, we sat down with our friend and longtime pro-strategist Anthony Ashley to get to the root of the discipline: what is strategy, what’s it made of, and how do we use strategy as a paradigm to structure our world. Listen for tools to assess immediate strengths and weaknesses, build good goals, and refine the unique approach the corresponds to the personality of any person or team. From the history of warfare to the formation of a dream, building companies to developing character, strategy’s the proven toolkit for it all.
We've got a few books stacked around the office that we like to flip through for inspiration, and Hank Shaw's "Buck, Buck, Moose" has had a spot on our desk for a while now. Shaw is a forager, angler, hunter, and chef, who combines all of his experience to pretty staggering effect. His journey out of political writing and into the ethics and better use of wild food would be worth an episode on its own, but throw in his knowledge of the culinary world and you've got something even more enticing. To read more by Shaw check out his blog: https://honest-food.net
Dr James practices medicine out of his clinic in Colorado, True Life Medicine, after leaving behind the "traditional Western model" of healthcare. By addressing symptoms alone, Dr James claims that we are giving people bigger and bigger band-aids that never solve the root of the issue. It's time to throw most of our assumptions and ideas of normal out the window, and start being active in our own lives when it comes to our bodies.
Know what Familiarity breeds? Perceived Familiarity. Perceived Familiarity breeds Unfamiliarity. Which breeds Disinterest, Apathy, and, yup, Contempt. This is one of the most important facts about a life with God—we must fight Perceived Familiarity. Today we’ll do that. We’ll blank the slate and tell the story, highlighting it’s many strange facets (Abraham’s fighting company of 318 men, the throw-down, single-elimination tournament with the gods of Egypt, the apocalypse after Malachi, etc), to refresh our worldview and remember just how strange this story is. Fair warning - gospel talk ensues, but hang in there: this is war for the destiny of the universe.
Laurie Thornton is one part of a husband/wife pastoral team (guess which) with a decade of experience in music ministry, discipleship, missions, retreat-leading, all that. She has a dynamite relationship with God, is what we’re saying, and a proven handle on what it means to live as a disciple in his Kingdom. We asked her to come talk about leadership, starting with a little paradigm work and moving on to kingdom households, finding mentors, and developing a life with God that’s actually worth emulating.
The summer issue of And Sons is out, and yes, it technically is still summer even though most schools are back in session. In this episode Blaine and Sam flesh out some of the articles on super reading, fathering, and the creative life.
When Justin Lukasavige began running he didn't imagine going for 100 kilometers let alone down the block. But then Dave Eitemiller came along and offered his guidance, and an ultrarunning partnership was born. It's not just about handling the miles, or learning how to pace, or how to deal with suffering. Sometimes what we need is a mentor who we can learn from and be invited by into new and previously impossible adventures.
Why do we keep going back to the same places? What is the value of knowing a land, a rock face, a town, when everything is about "what's next"? John (Padre) writes, "Each year we return lays down a new layer of story, and adventure, beauty and encounter. Layer upon layer, like a rich patina on a piece of heirloom furniture, or better, like the technique Rembrandt and the Old Masters used in their painting, carefully laying down dozens of layers of paint to achieve that extraordinary effect of depth and gravitas."
Sean Buckles is a coffee shop maven with a long career in the US Army, both as a member of a Special Ops team and as an instructor. He’s one of those people you like more every new thing you learn, though it isn’t easy to get him to talk about himself. We like Sean for a lot of reasons, but principally because he’s a dad with a life with God. And not just to his own family, though that’s true, but to his staff and to his community and a to a wider circle than we probably know. In this conversation, we try to get more of the story, from teaching folks to jump out of airplanes to leaving the military just shy of retirement to building an outstanding business, this is a story about risk and a life with God.
The pernicious and crippling feeling of "it's too late" can infiltrate almost every part of our lives, so it should be no surprise that we are already feeling it in regards to our summer and all the daydreamed adventures we had for it back in the colder months. Sometimes setting small goals, finding loopholes in our own routines, or using a hack to break through a wall of impossibility is just what we need. Not all of these will apply to everyone, maybe none of them will, but at the end of the day we don't want "it's too late" to stop us from experiencing life and joy and the rest of summer.
We'll be honest and say that this episode made a least 1/2 of the And Sons team a little queasy, insofar as it looked like we'd have to buy typewriters and write outside in Oxfords, no socks. This episode is about wonder, and beauty. The case study is poetry. How do you deepen you capacity for beauty? What regular practices increase a person's sensitivity? How long should it take. We've brought Luke back on to talk about all of it. Only we asked him to leave his black beret at home.
You remember Jesse Barkalow - the longtime painter, line cook, and world's most prolific reader. Well, he's been at seminary. Usually, that makes us concerned for a person's well being. But Jesse has a rare disposition, and the opportunity seems to be improving his life with God. We wanted to know why. So in this episode, we're asking a key question: what's the basic question of theology/the human heart? As a matter of course, we also dive into the method that promotes union with God, as well as the paradoxes of seeing/blindness reconciled in the person of Jesus.
This is one of those episodes that will leave you wanting more. And maybe there is a part 2 in store for the future. Wendell Moss is a counselor based in Seattle, WA, who specializes in trauma and narrative. The cultural narratives of masculinity and race and trauma are (perhaps not surprisingly) similar and require similar acts of courage and curiosity to enter into.
The books Moss recommends at the end are: Just Mercy (Bryan Stevenson), White Awake (Daniel Hill), Roadmap to Reconciliation (Brenda Salter McNeil).
If we could sit our younger selves down from five or 10 years ago, we would have a few suggestions to share about how to better navigate the realm of friendships and relationships. People are never a blank slate. Jesus is always up to something, and we can partner with him or try to figure it out by ourselves. Are we really after redemption, or do we just want gratification through our friends? There is always something deeper at play.
If And Sons had an FAQ, one question would top the list: What do I do with what feels like Wasted Time? In this episode, we try to reframe the issue, describing wasted time in terms of the desert, the Hebrew name of which just means “God Speaks.” And, because this is And Sons, there’s plenty of distinction-making between our ability to waste time and God’s ability to redeem time, the development of a calling vs the aggregation of achievement, and a comfortable job vs and apprenticeship. It’s all real time over here, so if you haven’t heard what Blaine actually did in Grad School, or how Sam structures his life in young kid years, buckle your seatbelt.
It’s not a secret Blaine likes words. Maybe it’s the history with rhetoric. Maybe it’s the writing genes. But still, there it is: words are a repository of human experience. Words reveal the world. They are almost completely unique in their ability to transmit diverse experiences. In this episode, we let Blaine pick a few of his favorites, explain how language works, then explore key concepts relating to time, economy, and community. There’s enough in one word to change your worldview, but today, we’ve got six. Maybe seven. Or eight.
Makoto Fujimura is an internationally-renowned artist, writer, and visionary. His work addresses the tension between trauma and creativity, culture creation, and the extravagant wastefulness of God (among a whole host of other themes). We’ve waited a long time for this conversation, chomping at the bit to ask Mako how, exactly, an artist “sees,” what that vision does for the world, and how somebody goes about developing it. Plus, Mako has some pretty unique insights on the way creativity relates to trauma inside the story of God. It’s a mind-blowing episode, is what we’re saying, and although the audio we captured turned out a little shaky, Mako’s eloquence more than makes up for it.
What can look like, and feel like, soul care may sometimes not be that at all. Too many stories end in broken pieces when fueled by the phrase "No one is looking out for me, I am on my own in finding life". We need to care for our joy and our hearts, but the self-arranging life is a trap that doesn't offer what it seems.
The And Sons introductory playbook on using technology well. From tech calendars to channel-specific goals, it’s all about practical steps to mastering the technology you employ.
It’s summer. The question is, how do you actually get out more this season? We grabbed Justin and JD from the And Sons team, two men who have ridden motorcycles across the state, mountain biked all over the west, and mastered micro adventures, to answer that question. From asking God to frame your summer to scheduling to structure and rhythm, this is an episode to turn the warm summer days into real worthwhile adventure.
Joe Steinke is, in a word, an apostle. As a member of the leadership team of the Boiler Room church network, he oversees a growing network of house churches; as a leader of the Antioch School, he’s a real New Testament church wiz. Talking with Joe is like talking with a dad, in pretty much the best way. He’s committed to the growth, maturity, and flourishing of church families under his purview, and he’s been at it for decades. We really like the dude, is what we’re saying, and in this conversation, we jump into the Utopian Slope, a model for understanding the life cycle of a community. If you’ve ever banded together with like-minded folks to share a vision, tried to reach that vision, failed, and then had to recover, this is the episode for you. Doubts and disappointment effect every community. The thing that matters, as you’ll see here, is what you do with them.
If we are willing to see and to engage, we will find that God is always inviting us into the frontier with him. He is constantly exposing ways that we need to grow or change, but often we don't want to hear about it. When we do engage what is current, we are invited into deeper intimacy and new terrain with him and within ourselves.
We’re stoked this week to bring you a conversation with Bart Gavigan. Bart is screenwriter, mentor, Holy Spirit-following firebrand. One week, Bart might be hanging with the higher-ups of the BBC, working with the Hollywood A-list, or passing up on a conversation with David Oyelowo at the pub. The next, he might be helping nonprofits with tiny film projects. Best of all, he’s had a chatty relationship with God his entire life, a relationship that’s taken him, as he puts it, into worlds of beauty and worlds of horror. In this wide-ranging conversation, we talk about Bart’s youth in slums in Ireland and London, his experience visiting 60 countries in 5 years to make films—during which he witnessed a deaf and dumb school healed en masse, met child soldiers in Sierra Leone, and entered the worst orphanages in the world—and his life passing up on fame to pursue intimacy with God. Sometimes, it takes a storytellers eyes to help you see your own story afresh. This is a conversation to give you a new vision of the world.
In this episode, Sam and Blaine revisit fathering a year and a half into the game. It turns out, fathering is like most relationships, only more so. It requires a few skills everyone should have, like a method for developing patience, a thorough understanding of repentance, and the ability to pick out strands of joy in the middle of otherwise encompassing work. Sam and Blaine talk through these and other practices, as well as some basic tenants of the relational soul, like the fact relationship comes from sabbath, and the inclination of the heart to seek comfort when what it needs is intimacy.
From fiction to film to television, cultures across time have been creating a narrative for the public. National identities, hopes and dreams for the future, ways of placing ourselves in history, all are woven into the simple and complex stories that we tell. What stories are we telling ourselves these days, and what does that reveal about our culture now?
You've probably made some assumptions by the title alone, but this episode is around conversations that we seem to keep having. "If only I made a little more... then I would be happy" seems to be a sentiment that, if not always spoken aloud, creeps in and tries to give the verdict on our lives. Happiness, contentment, joy, hope... these are all attributes that take cultivation, rather than waiting around for them to appear because the time is right.
Sometimes the easiest sages to miss are the ones already in your life—we work hard to avoid that mistake, and today we sat down with Sam Ainslie of the RH staff to talk about work. A career, specifically, and how to keep your heart alive in varied seasons of a working life. This conversation also dives into work stress (how much is too much), direction (do you really need to know where you’re going) and purpose (can you develop a vocation inside a career?).
What do two decades of friendship look like? How is it even possible these days, with travel, life changes, and the difficulties of keeping in touch with friends? Alex Burton and Morgan Snyder join Blaine and Sam in the studio to talk about male friendship, what works, what hurts, and some practical reorientations on how we should be thinking about ourselves and building a close group around us.
In Part 2, Padre joins Sam and Blaine to finish their conversation on social and personal agreements that are killing millennials, and what is possible by breaking them.
"I fear the worst has happened. You are losing heart, may have already lost it altogether." This weeks conversation with Padre centers around one of the articles written in the Winter '18 issue of And Sons, which we hope conveys the posture of love that it was offered from, rather than some assumed condemnation. As Padre writes:
"I believe this loss of heart, now sweeping an entire generation, is deeply linked to some core beliefs that have crept in. I call them “agreements” because they are ideas which have secured a deep agreement in your heart without you really stopping to consider the implications. We all breathe a cultural air; the assumptions we absorb are the very things that seem to us to need no explanation.
Which is good news, actually, because it means you can fight your way out; you can get your hope and your heart back."
We needed something lighter this week, so we thought we'd practice the act of conversation. How to ask good questions and where we go with the answers can separate a bland interaction from a profound one.
Michael Cusick is a counselor, lecturer, and the founder of Restoring the Soul, a ministry addressing sexual addiction through deep, whole-hearted restoration. His work (including two books) centers on a pair of pressing questions: what, exactly, is our sexuality for, and what does sexual wholeness look like? Safe to say we got more than we bargained for - from a definition of sexuality rooted in the Imago Dei and the creative capacity of human beings to a short list of what not to do with sexual addiction, this conversation completely reframes sexuality and offers some direction for the guy looking to be an alive, whole-hearted man whose sexuality directs him into deep union with God.
It's a simple concept, that when we experience seasons or days or hours that make us uncomfortable or are filled with pain of some kind we have two choices: we can run and medicate, or we can press in and grow. Easier said than done. Where are you taking your pain these days?
This week: a sneak peek into the young men's session at the February 2018 Boot Camp in Colorado. It's the And Sons message all in one place: naming things about our world and experience, offering some counsel on the day to day, and inviting you to come journey with us.
We go a little deep this week, into the roots of why we are the way we are as a social media society, what philosophies got us there, and how our world is effecting us. Inspired by Matthew Crawford's book, "The World Beyond Your Head," Sam and Blaine dive into how we understand ourselves, how we experience the world around us, and how technology has grown and changed for the worse. Hold on to your seat belts.
John Eldredge, also known as "Padre" around the And Sons world, joins Sam and Blaine as they begin the conversation around masculine spirituality. Why are so many men struggling with the typical "church experience"? Does there seem to be more women than men in most faith settings? Why is that? Finding God in the things you love, in adventure and in battle, are some of the ways to step into a fuller spiritual experience.
It's the phone call, the text, the "mayday" from a friend or family member that changes everything. You jump in the car to meet them, or sit down to talk on the phone and wonder, "What do I do now? What do I offer?" Dan Allender is back on the podcast to offer some simple counsel on how to engage those in your world who have recently experienced trauma of some kind, and how we can learn to walk alongside them.
This episode is not an advertisement. Money and budgeting are usually more complicated than issues of dollars and cents, there's often shame and personal growth right in the middle. In our conversation with Jesse Mecham, founder of YNAB, we get to explore what motivates someone to think about budgeting, and what Mecham would want to change about the way people think about money. While there are lots of budgeting programs, styles, and apps out there it's probably best if you stick to the one you've committed to, and if you haven't committed to one, maybe it's time to think about why.
There are many things that we need in life, Maslow's Hierarchy and all that, but some things stand out on their own. Initiation is one of the big ones. It's something that probably most of us haven't experienced in our life, either in the small and specific or in the sweeping narrative of our stories. Morgan Snyder, of Ransomed Heart and Become Good Soil, takes us in to the ways that it is needed and offered.
After the triathlon nerd-out episode, we realized nobody's story of adventure and exercise begins at the starting line. For most of us, stepping out into adventure means working through sometimes decades-long stories of opposition. We asked Luke to come in and share his story of longtime injury, eventual achievement, and overcoming shame. Enjoy a conversation on starting places, breaking agreements, and entering into an embodied life.
There’s an old line in Tozer we’ve come to appreciate a great deal. It’s this: “God is speaking. He is, by His nature, continuously articulate. He fills the world with His speaking voice.” But the layers in and through which He is speaking aren't always obvious on first glance. Mandy Nelson and Scott Morin have spent their lives teaching and learning more about these layers and the implications for our lives.
To find our more about Nelson and Morin you can go here: http://www.empoweringranch.com
There’s nothing like the guys on your own team—Allen Arnold founding the fiction division at Thomas Nelson Publishing, published between 500 and 600 novels as VP of that division, and has a better grasp on story than most people earn in their lifetime. Blaine and Sam jump in to ask about engaging story, how to create while inside conflict, and what it takes to set good stories, lived and read, apart. We like to say that we need to learn to read our lives as stories; that’s well and good, but to be able to do that, we need to learn more about the odd animal that story is.
And Sons had Mark Evans on for and interview several months ago to talk about his leather-craft art, his journey as a creative, and what fuels him. We know you loved it, and we certainly did, so Sam and Blaine jumped at the opportunity to sit down with Evans when he was stateside this summer.
It's no secret that around the And Sons office we love to read and learn from men and women who have gone before us, and that's certainly true of the men and women who step into and out of combat situations. Distilled from the many lessons offered, Blaine and Sam go through some of their favorites and how they can be applied to our lives.
Sam and Blaine reflect on their journey into the world of hunting, how most of the men in their world are first-generation hunters, and how initiation and intention effect our world. Through the lens of hunting stories from this year and those of a decade ago, Sam and Blaine share on their experience of this ancient practice.
In this episode, Blaine and Sam take up the issue of self-knowledge. You’re never going to treat anyone’s heart better than you treat your own, and you’re never going to know anyone’s heart better than you know your own. That being the case, Sam and Blaine share a couple strategies for learning your own heart, and share where they’re growing in their own self-understanding: strengths, action, and relationship.
Brett Davis is the founder of Christian Surfers International, and has quite the story to go along with it. As part of the continuing goal to hear from the sages in our world, Blaine and Sam get to hear more of Brett Davis's story.
To better grasp how technology effects us today, we need to understand where the idea came from and what the purpose of technology was originally intended to be, and how it's changed and stayed the same over millennia. Spoiler: the issue is often more about how we use it and how it changes us, than it's inherent "goodness" or usefulness.
Blaine and Sam are joined by Jon Dale and Justin Lukasavige from the team to share stories about who we admire. It's a practice that we don't always think to do, but that can be surprising and helpful. So, who do you admire and try to emulate?
Sara Hagerty is the author of Unseen: The Gift of Being Hidden in a World That Loves to Be Noticed, and together with Blaine and Sam she talks about her journey with the church, burnout, discovering God in new ways, her lessons as a mother, and how choosing to tend to the unnoticed places in our lives can be the most rewarding.
Welcome back to Season 3 of the And Sons podcast. To kick things off, Sam and Blaine sat down with Tim Thornton, a friend, mentor, and artist, to talk about the creative process, how it mirrors the story of the gospel, and how we respond to crisis.
To read the interview with Tim on And Sons: http://andsonsmagazine.com/19/returning-art-interview-tim-thornton
To see more of Tim's art: http://timfthorntonart.com/
In time for the finale of Season 2 of the And Sons podcast, Sam and Blaine talk about rhythm, balance, and how they are (or more often are not) cultivating a life intentionally. The And Sons Podcast will return in late September.
Jon Dale is a member of the Ransomed Heart and And Sons teams, and while his work these days revolves around bringing the kingdom his journey didn't start there. Dale began early as an entrepreneur and has spent his life thinking about how to walk well in business and calling.
In part 2 of the feminism series, Sam and Blaine jump into the history of feminism in the US. Starting with ancient Athens (of course), on through the Blackstone Commentaries and early American legal frameworks, this episode explores the legal, political, and cultural circumstances that gave rise to 1st, 2nd, and 3rd wave feminism. Our aim here is to answer a triad of enduring questions: what, exactly, is going on, where'd it come from, and how should we be responding?
In this two-part series, Blaine and Sam dive into the history of feminism. But before they can do that, they dive into the history of history - the ancient Greek world, Xenophon, the Battle of Cunaxa - to understand a key concept. That's hegemony: the inclination of human beings to create systems that feed their flesh.
We love hearing about the creative journey here at And Sons, something that each of us acts out in our own unique ways. How someone chooses to pursue a calling, what choices they make, and how they keep their passion alive after a decade of plugging away all make up the story of Justin Rizzo. Part songwriter, part worship leader, part director, Rizzo's story of creativity and calling intertwine in this episode.
A longer episode with two parts within it: The first is an exploration of why the body matters, and why it should not be neglected, the second is why Sam and Blaine choose triathlon and lessons they've learned about the sport. We are beings that have multiple aspects: mind, heart, soul, body. To neglect one is to neglect the health of the whole.
We use terms like "God opened a door" or "closed the door" retrospectively all the time, but how do you tell in the moment if you are being invited into something or if God's not in it? How do you know if what you are experiencing is adversity and requires you to keep persisting and fighting through or if you are banging your head against a wall? How do we walk with our choices and relationships with God in unison? Sam, Blaine, and Padre sit down to throw around experiences and moments where these questions rise to the surface, and to give room for new ways of asking what might be the point of it all.
While filming for the latest And Sons project the team sat around in the truck on a cold night to debrief where they were and what what going on, internally and externally. What followed was an honest conversation about Resistance, what it's like to fight for something, and how each member of the team was managing their internal world.
Dan Allender is no stranger in the And Sons world, nor is he a stranger to listening to people's stories. Rather than give the quick steps to better remember names and influence people, the process of learning to be a better listener demands the same intention and commitment that it takes order to use.
How does an introvert in the music industry end up creating and hosting a podcast that gets over 55 million downloads? That's Brian Hardin's story, and it was never one that he would have anticipated. This week, Blaine and Sam get to sit down with the man behind Daily Audio Bible, an app and mission that now reaches millions of people each day, always read aloud by the man himself. From dramatic career shifts, to following the call of the heart, this conversation offers a look inside the success of Brian Hardin to see what makes it all possible.
This episode is an experiment. What happens when you sit three young(er) men around the table and start riffing on life? What stories feel important, what motivators rise to the surface, is it encouraging or intimidating to hear from the lives of those around us? Blaine and Sam sat down with an old friend, Jesse Barkalow, to talk about what's current, what's on the horizon, and what we need to know to become better chefs.
Kicking off Season Two, Bo Zivcak joins Sam and Blaine via the workings of technology from Slovakia, wherein he tells his story of growing up behind the Iron Curtain and his journey after its fall. Secret priests, Church partnership with laymen, and radical life shifts are but a taste of the wild story of Zivcak. Yet, despite the radical shift in politics and world events, his story is more about the heart and relationship with the Holy Spirit than anything on the surface.
Bringing the season to a close, Padre joins Sam and Blaine to talk about the mission of the podcast, what episodes they loved, and where we go from here. The And Sons Podcast will return with Season Two on June 6.
With Luke in town, the three brothers talk about the experience of life in the wake of college and all of the spoken and unspoken expectations of what it will be like. It's rare that our visions of the future pan out no matter what the season, but the transition from modern education to the modern job market and economy can feel more like a belly flop than a graceful dive. How we interpret this dichotomy and how we respond are crucial, not only for our work, but for our hearts as well.
This week, Blaine and Sam sat down with Jeff Vanderstelt, a longtime apostle/teacher/church-equipper. We know that for many young men, it’s a big and often tricky jump from living a life with Jesus to living life in a community with Jesus. Fortunately, there are folks like Jeff, whose insights on community, mission, and church offer a pretty darn good framework to begin operating with another level of intentionality and vision in your relationships, community, and your city.
In this conversation, Blaine and Sam nerd out on the history of Postmodern ideas, which like people or places have very specific stories that help inform where they came from and what they really are. From a solar eclipse to the demolition of a St. Louis neighborhood, Blaine explains five events in our past that helped shaped our understanding of our current world. Which is all to say: it's time And Sons unpacked just what we mean when we say "Postmodernism."
Ever heard that the same convictions that help you handle scarcity also help you handle plenty? Turns out it’s true. In this episode, we sat down with two men on our team, Bart Hansen and Jon Dale (who have at times led companies and at other times lacked two nickels to rub together) to ask a simple question: what do you wish you had known about money as a young man? From living simply to taking risks to choosing when not to lead, this conversation is full of gems for every man.
Sam Jolman is a councilor who in the last issue of And Sons Magazine explained that men need romance, not just sex. That was worth following up on, and in this conversation, Sam and Blaine dove in to hear about Jolman’s story with romance, the development of his masculine soul, and the need to understand sexuality as a capacity dependent on a man’s maturity. Men do need romance, but the ability to be a romantic and handle a relationship is developed over time, as a man chooses to engage his own heart and story, ask questions, and grow his relational capacity in his life with God.
Sam and Blaine challenge each other to make three choices this week that will effect change in their worlds. It's easy to want to change big things, or to get crippled by the pressure to do something dramatic, but to effect lasting change we need to understand our "circle of influence" and strategically make choices that will impact the things that we can control. If we do that, over time our circles of influence will grow to include things we never dreamed of.
These days getting married in your 20's is considered strange, with plenty of social and financial reasons to hold off. Whether you're one of the folks to take the leap, you're dating someone and wondering, or you're single and thinking about the road ahead, this conversation is for you. Sam and Blaine explore their experience in young marriages, with only a few years under the belt, it's amazing what has already surfaced.
Craig DeMartino is a record-holding adaptive rock climber with a powerful story. In this interview, we dive into his journey through trauma and suffering and ultimately back into doing what he loves. DeMartino offers thoughts on navigating pain, being a father, and the impact of choice on our lives.
It turns out, becoming a dad shows you which way you're headed as a man. Sam and Blaine talk about rhythms that sustain your heart, prioritizing the core elements of your calling when your time is limited, and increasing your capacity to sacrifice for others. Whether you are a father or not, massive shifts in our lives can help reveal areas of needed growth.
Mark Evans is an internationally-renowned artist and a pioneer in the craft of leather microsculpting. In this interview, we tease out his thoughts on the role of the visionary, the need for God in the creative life, resisting the tumult of technology, and tips for keeping your heart alive while you’re trying to communicate a vision no one else can see.
If we haven’t defined success for ourselves, the world will define it for us, and a misunderstanding of success can cripple a young man. Too often, we think of success as achievement, applause, and a reasonable cash prize. In this conversation, Sam and Blaine look at the roots of success, virtue, and mastery, in order to uncover some coordinates a man can use to understand his work.