The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill: Recent Episodes

Mr. Neill

A storytelling podcast

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Stories: 1. Drinking beer for Jesus 2. Falling out of love with the dog 3. Jersey no longer sees or hears the mailman 4. Mr. Neill is embarrassed to call his near deaf dog 5. With this one simple trick, Asia no longer misses Jersey 6. The old ladies in the neighborhood remind Mr. Neill that he's not all that good of a person

Music: 1. The Yas Yas Girl and Her Rythm Rascals - True love 2. Gene Gifford and His Orchestra - Dizzy gilde

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Stories: 1. Audio Galaxy reanimates Sir Harry Lauder who animates Gifford Neill 2. John Neill meets John Neill and they don’t like each other 3. Gifford Neill’s boss has a colorful office 4. Mr. Neill gets 3 jolts 5. Mr. Neill’s mace 6. The bay rum mystery 7. Andy D and the mystery of the Chinatown discard plate 8. Jeepers Creepers! 9. No hydro in Canada 10. Sexyham

Music: 1. Sir Harry Lauder - Stop yer tickling, Jock 2. Sunshine Boys Quartet - I am a pilgrim 3. York Bros - Riding and singing my song

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Stories

  1. Lost old people
  2. Oldness at work
  3. COBOL yinzer devs aren’t so old after all
  4. A cat named Tawm
  5. Oldness at Arcade Theatre
  6. Scent of the month club
  7. Young Mr. Neill builds a toolbox
  8. Mr. Neill makes the ultimate hipster toolbox
  9. Mr. Neill tries to sell his Soda Crate Toolboxes on Etsy
  10. Young Mr. Neill fails to sell his toys
  11. Young Mr. Neill fails to sell his Rubik’s cube solutions

Music

  1. Gene Gifford and His Orchestra - Squareface
  2. Coleman Brothers - Get away Mr. Satan, get away

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Stories

  1. Mr. Neill befriends a group of friendly anarchists
  2. Dance party failure
  3. Santarchy
  4. Pillow fight
  5. Luchador bowling
  6. Punk rock karaoke misunderstanding
  7. Karaoke humiliation
  8. Judgy house cleaner
  9. 11/11 11:11 end of the world party
  10. Glowing in a microbus
  11. Asia finds her people
  12. Glowing while washing dishes

Music

  1. oldmanneill - Shook me all night long
  2. Perry Como - Zing zing, zoom zoom

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Stories

  1. Mr. Neill picks a slacker to mentor him
  2. Mr. Morrill’s approach to teaching
  3. Mr. Neill gives a Geometry test
  4. Benjamin no longer has perfect attendance
  5. The professor and the Jesus painter
  6. 1.5 life hacks from Mr. Morrill
  7. Mr. Morrill joins the Army
  8. Daniel avoids disaster when the boss picks up the tab

Music

  1. Rosetta Howard - When I been drinking
  2. Sunshine Boys Quartet - Satisfied mind

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Stories:

  1. UIC succeeds in their quest to get rid on Mr. Neill
  2. Mr. Neill fears for the life of his elderly professor
  3. Mr. Neill has his head in the clouds with non-Euclidean Geometry
  4. Mr. Neill learns nothing in his education classes
  5. Mr. Neill enjoys grad school with no tests or homework
  6. Mr. Neill regrets: Not going to a party with his professor
  7. Not taking a selfie with muscle-men
  8. Not talking to 2 ladies in an elevator
  9. Not giving an IKEA employee a hug
  10. Not fostering a child
  11. Not saying "what's up with that guy?"
  12. Not playing Scrabble at the Jumping Bean Cafe
  13. Telling my nephew 2 story arcs

Music:

  1. Andy Kirk and his Twelve Clouds of Joy - Git
  2. oldmanneill - I'm sorry

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Stories:

  1. Gifford Neill growing up
  2. Gifford Neill joins the Navy
  3. Gifford Neill goes to college
  4. Gifford Neill gets married
  5. Gifford Neill builds a toolshed
  6. Gifford Neill has the dream life
  7. Gifford Neill gives up the dream life
  8. Gifford Neill overcomes health issues
  9. Gifford Neill gains financial stability
  10. Gifford Neill 2005-2024

Music:

Norwood Tew - If I could bring back my buddy

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Stories:

  1. Mr. Neill goes anti-car 2. Mr. Neill is a moving target 3. A field trip to downtown Chicago 4. Louis jumps off a bridge 5. A mound of ungraded papers 6. Digital record keeping failure 7. Everyone’s happy with their math grade 8. Mrs. Sorenson handles her business 9. Drug deal in the kid’s bathroom   Music:

  2. Red Jessup and His Melody Makers - Trouble don’t like music 2. Lonnie Johnson - Lonesome road 2. Wiley and Gene - Bothered by the blues

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Stories:

  1. The Neills start to walk and talk 2. The unstoppable Mrs. Neill goes back to school 3. Drunk Leslie and sober Leslie are two different people 4. Lowballing Leslie 5. The scheme to live for two years without an income 6. Four results from a season of poverty   Music:

  2. Wingy Mannone - My sweet Lorraine 2. Golden Gate Quartet - High low and wide

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Stories:

  1. Prilosec Blues 2. Strange things are afoot in Buenos Aires 3. Mr. Neill gets to the root of the problem 4. Two wonderful docs that gave bad advice 5. One terrible doc that gave good advice 6. Seven reasons the good advice doc was terrible 7. Asia experiences Catholicism 8. Mr. Neill and Asia go to church 9. Preacher-man eventually drives the ball deep   Music:

  2. Sharkey and his Sharks of Rhythm - Give me an old fashioned swing 2. Jake and Carl - When the white azaleas start blooming

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Stories: 1. Labor day, 1977 2. The reluctant bed wetter 3. They didn’t love “Lucky” 4. The legend of Lynn 5. Elderly parents 6. Watching punk rock with Lynn 7. The wonders of Kansas City 8. An aging Lynn only wants to bowl   Music:

  1. King Oliver and his Orchestra - St. James infirmary

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Stories: 1. Mr. Neill gets knocked out 2. Three reasons to be in Toledo 3. Watching TV on February 10, 1990 4. Chris opts out 5. Song tapes 6. Mr. Neill gets cornered 7. Mr. Neill gets serious in Columbus 8. Mr. Neill asks a heavy question   Music:

  1. Bill Carlisle's Kentucky Boys - Roll on old troubles roll on 2. Something New 1998 - All is well with me 3. Something New 2002 - Jesus I live to Thee

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Stories:

  1. The legend of Uncle Noel 2. George has magic dumbbells 3. George hacks his gaming console 4. On the 3rd try, Mr. Neill learns not to overwhelm his kids 5. George is a miner 6. Katt's book vanishes 7. Brian misses Iowa 8. Conrad flips 9. The virgin hot tub 10. Mr. Neill fails to ask an important question   Music:

  2. Stephen Grappelly and His Hot Four with Django Reinhardt - Clouds 2. Riverside Ramblers - Dissatisfied

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Stories:

  1. Yelling “fleas” into a phone 2. Thompson presses a button 3. White Cadillac, tinted windows 4. Looking through binoculars   Music:

  2. Wingy Manone - Formal night in Harlem

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Stories:

  1. Career day has Mr. Neill wanting to change careers 2. Mr. Avellini, Mr. Bob Avellini 3. Mr. Wendy’s doesn’t pay taxes 4. Rufus reps Gary Sheffield 5. Shawn Baldwin has never watched Friends 6. Mr. Baldwin helps out the math department   Music:

  2. Bud Freeman and His Famous Chicagoans - After awhile

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Stories:

  1. Guitar lessons and image repair 2. A phone call changes Mr. Neill's mind 3. Buying and selling shares in a band 4. Playing at Phyllis' 5. Nan gives a pep talk 6. 4x4 tries to mow down eggers 7. Bullying bandmates into recording 3 songs 8. Kirk wins back the love of his life 9. Old man hates to jam

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Stories: 1. Giving bricks to eccentric people 2. Larry David and his castle 3. The pee jug 4. Sorry, no 3 million dollars for you 5. A debris hauler misses his dad   Music:

  1. Louis Armstrong and Ella Fitzgerald - The frim fram sauce 2. Shelton Brothers - Just because

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Stories:

  1. Hangin’ with Marty 2. The name is Mark, not Marty 3. Roaches in Kentucky 4. Rats at 911 S. Carpenter 5. The bicentennial club 6. Old Irving Park circa 1976 7. Bethie’s sister ain’t having it 8. Block parties 9. Groceries at Jay Bees   Music:

  2. Beale Street Boys - Back alley blues 2. Riverside Ramblers - Wondering

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Stories:

  1. Shut up ya crackhead 2. Elite modeling 3. Horton leaves no stone unturned 4. Horton shovels elephant poo 5. Stories will make a teacher human 6. Chitlins 7. A month on Amtrak 8. Bread   Music:

  2. Big Bill - Cotton choppin' blues 2. Gene Gifford and His Orchestra - Nothin' but the blues

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Stories:

  1. CC will kill Mr. Neill if he calls him CC 2. What's it like being in a gang 3. CC pays his debt to society 4. The name is Jim, not Bub 5. Jim sleeps on our couch and gives out jobs 6. Jim can't afford to be sore 7. Jim was teaching, but it was as if he wasn't there 8. Giving Jim some business advice 9. Mrs. Neill quits her job and Mr. Neill has to scramble 10. Three career paths 11. Mr. Neill forgets the golden rule of banking 12. Learning new education jargon 13. Learning how to code from a scammy sounding website 14. Eating pizza to celebrate the light at the end of the tunnel 15. A return to teaching 16. Mr. Neill joins a bootcamp 17. 748 Warrington Avenue   Music:

  2. Hal Paige and his Blues Boys - Big foot May 2. Delmore Brothers - Blues stay away from me 3. Little Son Joe - Black rat swing 4. Doc Sausage and His Mad Lads - She don't want me no more

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Stories:

  1. The kindest and unkindest words 2. The legend of Derek Jurina 3. Open mic night at Club Cafe 4. The blind comedian 5. Actor-cop 6. Call and response with a Yiddish rapper 7. Sunglasses so your boss can't see 8. Oversported 9. A jazz pianist with too many records 10. A very foul ball Music:

  2. Oldmanneill - Derek Jurina 2. Ray Ball & His Guitar - Oklahoma, land of the sunny west 3. Joe Werner and Ramblers - Dreaming

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Stories:

  1. A strange man on a unicycle 2. Night Moves   Music:

  2. Studs Henderson and His Orchestra – Proposition baby

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Stories:

  1. Dr. Sharon Rae Bender thinks Mr. Neill peed in the snow 2. Rats at Schurz 3. The blind sub 4. Did you steal my glasses? 5. Lunchtime 6. Mike says we need to move along 7. Mike shows us a new way to share our food   Music:

  2. Meeting of Important People – For the masses (demo) 2. Scott Bradlee’s Postmodern Jukebox – All the small things (feat. Puddles Pity Party) 3. Hugh Cross and Riley Puckett – Go feather your nest

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Stories:

  1. 10 months of theological studies 2. Aimless musings after a week in bed 3. The dream job   Music:

  2. Allen Brothers – A new salty dog 2. Coleman Hawkins – Some of these days 3. Andy Kirk and his Twelve Clouds of Joy – Mess-a-stomp

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Stories:

  1. Carol, stop beating your kids 2. A fireball breaks up a party 3. A man’s beer and his meat are insulted 4. A runaway truck thwarts another home sale   Music:

  2. Dusty Boogie 2. Summer Dreams 3. Moments Pause 4. Swooning Melody All tracks are by 2 Mello, from Midnight Broadcasts Vol. 1 & 2, and After Midnight: Unaired Broadcasts.
    Check out 2 Mello’s Bandcamp page here.

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Stories:

  1. A potential home buyer takes a tumble 2. Become popular by playing hacky sack 3. A dog named D.O.G. 4. Free the weed   Music:

  2. Quintet of the Hot Club of France – Minor’s swing 2. Louis Armstrong – I’ll walk alone 3. Jimmie Rodgers – Rock all our babies to sleep 4. Jack Dupree – Tongue-tied blues

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Stories:

  1. A Dory-like waitress (Argentine) 2. Dad, I want to rap (Burmese) 3. A flip phone videographer (Sri Lankan) 4. But this is pork (Chinese)   Intermission music by Zachary Neill

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Stories:

  1. Spongebob grew up in my house 2. Hank wants to sing hymns and shoot guns 3. The perils of video game addiction   Music:

  2. Sonny Burke and His Orchestra – Mambo on my mind 2. Jimmy Witherspoon – Ain’t nobody’s business 3. York Brothers – Goodbye and luck to you

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Stories:

  1. The mansion at 3030 Elroy St. 2. The lawn he wants is no lawn 3. If they start fighting, keep playing…but if they start shooting, stop Music:

  2. Hawkins – Some of these days 2. James (Beal Street) Clark – You can’t make the grade 3. Unhip – Eventually

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Stories:

  1. Tell us more about the texture of popcorn 2. A Weird Al singalong 3. Churro bites a longboarder down in Buenos Aires   Music:

  2. Cliff Carlisle – It takes the old hen to deliver the goods 2. York Bros – Going home 3. The Fairfield Four – Don’t leave me

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Stories:

  1. They were Star Wars, but Mr. Neill was not Star Wars 2. Surfing on David M 3. Mr. Neill, there are three baby mouses, and they are looooking at me   Music

  2. Callahan Brothers – I’ll be thinking of the days gone by 2. Yas Yas Girl – Grieving heart blues 3. Bob Skyles and His Skyrockets – The pal that I loved

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Stories:

  1. Parisian children unleashed – part I 2. Parisian children unleashed – part II 3. Too old to lie   Music

  2. Carolina Twins – Off to the war I’m going 2. Cliff Carlisle – Memories that make me cry 3. Sunshine Boys Quartet – Where no one stands alone

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Stories:

  1. Spinning records with Asia 2. Two good lines 3. Taking hospitality 4. Giving hospitality 5. Unless March 28 was “reverse racism day”, Lauren D was wrong   Music:

  2. Allen Brothers –  Maybe next week sometime 2. Joe Werner and the Ramblers – Crap shooter’s hop 3. Teddy Bunn – If you see me comin’ 4. The Cotton Pickers – You tell her I stutter 5. Prairie Ramblers – Take me back to my boots and saddle

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Stories:

  1. Pounding on a table will get you hired 2. Breakfast with the entertainment industry 3. Three accidents in one day 4. Strange things are afoot at Tilden High School 5. A rolling pickle disturbs the serenity of bus 60   Music:

  2. Lou Gold – I can’t get over a girl like you 2. Ann Cole – Are you satisfied 3. Swan’s Silvertone Singers – I want to rest 4. Gene Gifford and his Orchestra – New Orleans twist 5. Leonard C. Fulwider – Dalton round-up

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Stories:

  1. Camp counseling 2. 1st memories 3. Mr. Neill delivers money in his underwear 4. The hottest car ever 5. Parking   Music:

  2. Wingy Manone – Swingin at the hickory house 2. Sons of the Pioneers – Lie low little doggies 3. Jimmy Bowen – Ever lovin fingers 4. Joe Werner and the Ramblers – Memory of Mother 5. Harry Roy – Jazz me blues

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Stories:

  1. Anthony Nuzzo is alive 2. The right woman shouldn’t make you feel like a loser 3. Don’t compare yourself to Diddy 4. Filling in the blanks…strange things are afoot at the Korean restaurant 5. Coincidences can mean nothing   Music:

  2. Chick Bullock and his Levee Loungers – Blue moon 2. Jesse Rodgers – Hummin to my honey 3. Andy Kirk – Froggy bottom 4. Wingy Manone – Paper doll 5. Joe Fingers Carr – Ivory rag

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Stories:

  1. Dr. Pete 2. Asia and her guitar 3. A camp with Mr. Neill 4. What are you kids trying to pull   Music:

  2. Wingy Manone – Getting some fun out of life 2. Paul Whiteman and His Orchestra – There ain’t no sweet man that’s worth the salt of my tears

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Stories:

  1. Going to Joliet at the end of the week 2. Halloween for the kids in the projects 3. Mowing the weeds at Sun-Ray Corvette

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Stories:

  1. Eating at Manny’s 2. The man on the train trying to catch flies 3. Don Yanek and his band Weedy