One Bright Star - Life After Loss: Recent Episodes
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One Bright Star's Life After Loss podcast focuses on the journey that parents and families face after the death of a child or loved one. Each episode, your hosts Erica Fischer and Alicia More bring you the personal stories of families who have faced this unimaginable heartache. Other topics include: coping with guilt, processing grief, finding meaning in life, paying tribute, honoring and remembering a beloved, confronting a broken heart and further discussing the ongoing mission of One Bright Star of being a resource to families who have suffered the death of a child. OneBrightStar.org
One Bright Star held its annual fall children's memorial service on Sunday, September 29, 2024 at Erlandson Park in Mankato, Minnesota. The program featured a welcome message from Erica Fischer, executive director and Becca Roberson, president of One Bright Star; music by In A Bind piano and vocals; an invocation prayer read by Matt Sipe; guest speaker, Danielle Duffey; a poem: As We Remember Them, read by Chris Oldenburg; One Bright Star poem read by founding mother Linda Janavaras and the reading of the children's names by Kristine Schimek.
Mankato, Minnesota nonprofit, One Bright Star, offers grants to families and individuals to attend a grief retreat in Danbury, Wisconsin called Faith's Lodge. It's a safe place for families to gather who have suffered child loss. On this Life After Loss podcast, we are joined by Joan Stanford. Her son, Jeremy, died in 2019 to veterans suicide. Joan was the first recipient of a One Bright Star grant to attend Faith's Lodge. She describes her experience over the three-day weekend and outlines what others can expect when they attend. She said it was empowering to share her story with others who have suffered a similar loss. She felt she could finally breathe and exhale since the loss of her son five years ago. She said the experience was healing and felt she was not alone on her grief journey. The experience made Joan feel special and she also felt able to give others hope in letting them know that they could also find meaning and happiness in their lives following such a tragic loss. If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health issues, help is available. Please dial or text the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988 or visit 988lifeline.org for free and confidential support. OneBrightStar.org
Danielle Duffey returns to our podcast three years after her first appearance to talk about her ongoing grief journey. In 2016, she and her husband lost their 17-month old son, Blake, to a medical mystery called: Sudden Unexplained Death in Childhood (SUDC). Danielle felt very much alone, suffering in silence and feeling like she was drowning in her grief. She didn't know how to express her sorrow and couldn't move forward for years. She discovered that journaling and using targeted journal prompts became her lifeline to self-reflection and helped her to find gratitude. It gave clarity which allowed her to love herself like she never had before. Join us for Danielle's story of finding distinction between grief and mourning and how she began to heal once she started to mourn. OneBrightStar.org
The mission of One Bright Star is to be a resource to families who have lost a child to death. As part of that mission, OBS also tries to align with and support other local nonprofits that have a similar mission. We are joined on this Life After Loss podcast by Mankato, Minnesota nonprofit, Wings of Hope. Chris Oldenburg and DeeAnn Wacker lead this organization with its mission of serving families who have lost a child in pregnancy, stillbirth and newborn death. It has a memorial site at Calvary Cemetery in Mankato and hosts events throughout the year to honor and remember these children. Join us for a discussion about how this organization got its start and how it serves families in need during a very difficult time in their lives. WingsOfHopeMankato.com OneBrightStar.org
Tiffany Ward joins our podcast to talk about the extraordinary life of her mother, Cheryl. Although her mom's passing was just a short time ago, Tiffany beams as she talks about their relationship and how Cheryl touched so many lives. Because Cheryl had so many life experiences, she connected very easily with others and helped them navigate through their own trials and tribulations. At one point, Tiffany found herself grieving her mom's loss even before she had passed. She learned to cherish every moment which allowed her and Cheryl to enjoy their open and deep relationship while her mom was in hospice. Tiffany speaks about the signs that her mom leaves for her since her passing, to just let her know that everything is alright. Join us for a heartwarming discussion about a family's love and the lasting legacy that Cheryl leaves behind.OneBrightStar.org
One Bright Star board of directors members Tracy Davies and Nicole Van Sickle join our podcast to talk about their own grief journey. Both have suffered the death of a child and share their stories about a grief journey that is emotional and ongoing. Part of that journey brought them to a retreat in Wisconsin called Faith's Lodge. It's a safe place where parents and families come to explore their inner-most feelings with others who have the shared experience of losing a child. One Bright Star is proud to be able to help families attend the retreat through a grant program that will offset the cost of the three-night, four day stay at the lodge. Nicole and Tracy talk about their personal experience at the lodge and help answer questions about what to expect at the venue. Both agree, that it was the single best decision they've made to help them through their loss and to navigate through their grief. If you or someone you know is suffering through the loss of a child, please share this podcast with them to know there is help available through One Bright Star. More information at: FaithsLodge.org and OneBrightStar.org
Executive Director, Erica Fischer and board member, Alicia More, take a look back at 2023 and discuss everything One Bright Star was able to accomplish for its grieving families. From setting up grant programs to help parents attend retreats at Faith's Lodge in Danbury, Wisconsin to Mothers of Angels events to connecting with bereaved parents through Comfort Conversations, OBS, with the help of its many financial supporters was able to do so many great things to serve its mission. They also talked about updating the OBS website, adding Bereavement Bags and Cassie's Cuddles at the local hospital, updating the Star Grief Journal, annual OBS board retreat with guest speaker, pastor Jillene Gallatin, annual Celebration of Life Gala and the Life After Loss Podcast. Join us for a recap of 2023 and a look ahead at what's in store for 2024!
Join us for part two of our conversation with Jillene Gallatin, Senior Pastor at Grace Lutheran Church in Waseca, Minnesota. Jillene talks about the, "seasons of grief" rather than the stages of grief. People's misconception is that one moves through the stages rather than, often times, returning to a previous iteration of the process. At the age of 14, Jillene lost her mother, Mina Jean, to suicide. She speaks about the people in her life who helped her cope and understand her feelings and emotions. She discusses her grief journey which returned to anger when she reached the age that her mother passed away at and her sense of being paralyzed by fear. Jillene reinforces the notion that anger is not the final stop, it's not the end and she speaks about the importance of knowing the resources available in the community and the people to reach out to. She also helps us understand that we don't have to have all the answers when we are with the bereaved, but to stay with them as they navigate through the process. OneBrightStar.org
Jillene Gallatin is the Senior Pastor at Grace Lutheran Church in Waseca, Minnesota. She joins our podcast to talk about grief and how important it is for people to share their story. Jillene shares her personal story of facing grief and loss when she was fourteen years old and the tragedy of losing her mother to suicide. She talks about questions that don't have answers, feeling isolated and "holding a sacred space" for people to be able to tell their stories and the importance for others to listen to those stories. This discussion was also impactful for One Bright Star's Executive Director, Erica Fischer, as she is on the front lines as she comforts and listens to families who have suffered death. Erica shares her emotional interactions and how she feels such a personal connection to each and every family she talks to. Please join us for part one of our two-part discussion with Pastor Jillene. OneBrightStar.org
Becca and Dan Sharpsteen were excited to welcome their first child into the world. A full-term pregnancy and the eager anticipation of a newborn, soon turned to tragedy when they learned their son, Cal, would be stillborn. That twisted turn of events started a grief journey that has been an emotional roller coaster for the young couple. Becca joins our Life After Loss podcast to share their story and to help others who have suffered such a loss. She talks about the time in the hospital they spent with their son, holding him, singing to him, reading and trying to capture what memories they could with a boy who wasn't going to be coming home. The couple has channeled their emotions and energy into something to honor and remember their son called, "Cal's Corner." It's a mobile bookshelf stationed at the hospital and includes titles to help families who have suffered stillbirth, miscarriage or infant loss which will enable them to process their own grief and to further discuss the loss with surviving or future children. It also includes some favorite children's books that parents can read to their lost child while still in the hospital which helps them to cope and create memories. Please join us for the emotional story of Cal and the lasting legacy his life created. OneBrightStar.org
Dena and Travis Iverson suffered the stillbirth of their daughter, Cassie. They already had a son, Clayton, and they knew they wanted more children but it was a complicated process. Dena joins our podcast to talk about the emotional toll Cassie's loss took on them but they pushed forward, even after having three additional miscarriages. Dena wants her message for others to be that there is no fast-track to healing, it will wait for you, and people need to allow themselves to, "feel the feelings" and not feel guilty after a loss.
The Iverson's now have another son, Charlie and a daughter, Caylee. Dena tells her story to help others and talks about the projects she immersed herself in to not only help in her family's grief journey, but for the benefit of others who are suffering loss. Joy and sadness can live together and we hope you join us for Dena's inspirational story. OneBrightStar.org
Joan Stanford lost her son, Jeremy Reinarts, to veteran suicide in 2019. Jeremy was an Iraq war vet. Upon his return to civilian life, he suffered with mental illness, PTSD, and, like many veterans, had a difficult time with reintegration. Joan talks about her struggle with loneliness and the difficulties in her life with processing her sons death and her continued journey to keep Jeremy's memory alive. Joan says, "there are no rainbows" in her story. It's raw, difficult and emotional. Joan believes that Jeremy didn't want to die but that he didn't know how to live. He had dreams and goals and he had helped many people in his life but his personal struggle was too much for him to overcome. Joan wants to educate people on how to help those that are grieving. She says dealing with grief starts with being able to talk about it. Please join us for an impactful, emotional and straight-forward podcast discussing grief and finding joy in that grief. If you or someone you know is experiencing a crisis or having suicidal thoughts, please reach out to the National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by calling 988.
Our local community has suffered several losses in the past few months and it has taken a toll on many people. Death educator, Lynn Waterbury, joins us to talk about teen grief, the importance of expressing our emotions and coming together and addressing people's mental health needs in times of profound loss. Waterbury discusses the need for people to not just offer words of comfort or a praying hands emoj, but to take action and reach out to those individuals in a meaningful way and to show them we are there in their time of need. She also talks about there being no wrong way to grieve and how everyone is on their own timeline in their grief journey.
Jonna Hruby is a funeral director with Mankato Mortuary and a board member with One Bright Star. She is often times the first person that people come into contact with after a death. In her role, Jonna shares how important it is to help people begin the grieving process and be supportive and empathetic along the way. She details how difficult it is, not only for families, but also for her personally as a funeral director. Making sure all of the details are in place according to the directions from the family is a big part of her position. Being a wife and mother, Jonna knows how overwhelming death can be for a family, and she can fully put herself in the shoes of the bereaved. She feels like her career chose her and she helps people not only during the immediate process but sometimes even years later. Please join us for our podcast outlining a different perspective on death and grieving.
Angel mom, Patti Ahl, returns to our podcast and continues to share her grief journey after the death of her son, Alex. Patti's ongoing mission is to take this tragedy and turn it into a positive teachable moment to help others. Her love for her son will always outweigh the grief she endures, and, even in death, Alex will always be her son. Patti's story talks about how this could happen to anyone and that this type of loss does not discriminate. Patti offers hope to others by sharing the memories and legacy of her sons life.
Death educator, Lynn Waterbury joins us to discuss how we can help teenagers through the grief process after losing a parent. Her three daughters lost their dad at ages 19, 17 and 15. She discusses the limited resources available to help teens navigate the grief process, especially during the pandemic. Their blended family helped her children cope with grief and Waterbury talks about, "putting it in their terms," in order to have a conversation about the loss. Join us for a compelling and informative podcast discussing teen grief.
Andrea Nolan lost her sister Alicia in 2011 to suicide. Alicia left behind a two year old daughter, Azalea. Andrea describes an emotional time having lost her only sibling and seeing her parents having to cope with the loss of their first-born child. Andrea talks about the challenges of raising Azalea without her mom and being able to share Alicia's life with her. Andrea's grief journey was compounded in 2019 after her dad took his own life. She talks about the loss and how it has affected so many people. Andrea's journey is about survival, hope and sharing the memory of the people that were so important in her life.
Tyler Kotewa was a driven young man. In his short life he wrote a book, earned a Bachelor's and Master's degree, had many friends, loved music and started a band, had a love of math, was a student teacher and had a love of the outdoors. In 2016, Tyler was diagnosed with oral cancer and nine months later, at age 25, his physical journey ended. Tyler always felt his life would be short and said he would come back as an eagle to show his presence. On this episode of One Bright Star - Life After Loss, Tyler's mom, Chantal Heetland, joins us to talk about her son's life and the ways her family copes with his loss and how they continue to share and honor his memory.
One Bright Star board member, Julie Gruber, joins us to talk about the recent Mexican cultural event held at Old Town in Mankato, Minnesota called, "Dia de los Muertos - or Day of the Dead festival. It's a celebration to honor deceased loved ones and is an annual event in Hispanic culture. Gruber explains how One Bright Star got involved with the event, to learn about the tradition and offer outreach from the Mankato nonprofit. An altar or ofrenda (offering) was created at the OBS space and is intended to honor and remember lost loved ones. Every detail at the altar represents something significant and special in the remembrance of loved ones.
On this episode of One Bright Star - Life After Loss, we are joined by author Rachael Hanel. She wrote the book, We’ll Be the Last Ones to Let You Down: Memoir of a Gravedigger's Daughter. From an early age Rachael spent her time in cemeteries with her dad and mom and had a much different perspective on death. She visited the graves of those unknown to her as she wondered about the lives of those names on the headstones. The reality of death became more clear as she suddenly lost her 46 year old father at the age of 15. Hanel talks about the people that helped her move through her grief process and to also find humor in an otherwise overwhelming experience. She speaks about the importance of talking about loss and to make sure to carry on the memory of a lost loved one.
Death educator, Lynn Waterbury joins us for part II of our conversation about death, hope and loss. Experiencing feelings of grief and loss don't always have to be associated with death. Waterbury talks about trying to find peace and normalizing conversations with people when discussing death and loss. Her message is also about hope and realizing that there is more beyond death in a spiritual way and people need to know that they are not alone in their grief and loss. Waterbury is also a, "death doula" in training and discusses end-of-life situations and how a doula plays a part in the final physical journey of life.
Lynn Waterbury is a death educator. Having had a strict religious upbringing, she has developed, over time, a much different view of spirituality which lands more in a psychic medium type realm. She believes that she picked her parents. She also believes that before we are born, our soul chooses the lessons we are going to learn in life. She talks about how life and death is not a, 'right to left, beginning to end' proposition. She contends that life is a circle and death is a transition and that our souls are meant to be infinite. Join us for an intriguing and thought-provoking podcast on life and death, grief, and coping with loss and hear a different perspective on how interactions can happen with lost loved ones.
Brought together through adoption, Alayna and her brother Nolan were close. They shared what any brother and sister would share: family time, inside jokes, horseplay and watching each other grow. In this podcast, Alayna shares the life of her, "not so little brother," who tragically died in a motorcycle accident on August 9, 2020. She discusses Nolan's achievements and dreams, the challenges of planning a funeral during a pandemic and she honors and remembers her brother and best friend, who packed a lot of living into a short period of time, which gave her, "the true gift of a lifetime."
Executive Director of One Bright Star, Erica Fisher and President, Alicia More, fly solo for this podcast episode to talk more about the One Bright Star organization based in Mankato, Minnesota. They discuss the importance of all the resources that OBS offers to parents and families and talk about the upcoming Fall Memorial Service to honor and remember all those who are gone too soon. Please join us to learn more about the mission and outreach of this amazing nonprofit as it continues to grow to serve others.
In 2014, Patti and Barry Ahl lost their son, Alex, to an accidental fentanyl drug overdose at the age of 21. Patti pays tribute to Alex by taking her story and reaching out to teens and parents about Alex's life. She wants to take away the stigma of how we talk about addiction and emphasize that there are consequences to the choices we make. Patti also talks about coping with guilt and the strains that such a loss puts on her family and the difficulties they face. Please join us for a compelling twenty-minute podcast that all young people and families should listen to.
Sudden Unexplained Death in Childhood (SUDC) claims approximately 400 lives per year in children ages 1-18. In 2016, Danielle and her husband lost their 17 month-old son in the blink of the eye due to this tragic and devastating medical mystery. Danielle talks about how she was, "paralyzed by grief" and how she carries Blake's memory forward and how the experience has made her a better parent. Through this, Danielle has discovered new things about herself which has opened new doors in her life. She wants to connect with parents and families who have this shared experience and she speaks about how she can help bring joy through her grief journey and to try and normalize being able to talk openly about feelings and emotions with others.
Paige and her husband were preparing for twins when they learned seven weeks into the pregnancy that one of the babies suffered vanishing twin syndrome. The pregnancy continued and they were excited to find out that the other twin was a baby boy. They learned of medical complications at 24 weeks which eventually led to a stillbirth of baby Wyatt. Paige talks of her, "wave of grief" and the emotional roller coaster they were on as they had to leave the hospital, "empty-handed." Paige talks about how her faith and marriage were tested, her emotions of anger and anxiety, and speaks of her gratitude toward the staff at Mayo Clinic in Rochester who helped her process and navigate through this difficult experience. She also talks about the community of support she and her husband have received through family and friends.
Deb is the Vice President of One Bright Star and lost her 23 year old daughter, Crystal, in 2005. Deb leads an outreach program for OBS called, "Comfort Coffee" which is held at the Courtyard by Marriott Hotel in Mankato, Minnesota on the fourth Tuesday morning of each month. On this episode of One Bright Star - Life After Loss, she talks about the importance of this non-judgemental group that gathers to support and share each other's commonality of having lost a child. Deb is seeking to expand and is looking into starting an evening group called, "Comfort Cocktails" if there is an interest to do so. Please join this podcast and learn more about the diverse efforts of OBS to support its mission of being a resource to grieving families.
Dena and her husband's grief journey began on April 19, 2019 with the stillbirth of their daughter, Cassie. Dena talks about the importance of remembering and honoring her baby and her mission to help other mom's cope with their loss and raise money for causes important to her. She believes that talking about grief is healthy and doesn't want her daughter's memory to be a sad one for her or her family.
Tracy, a One Bright Star board member, lost her beloved son Nick in 2017. She talks about how life stopped for her on that day and the painstaking journey to move forward that followed. She shares her story of faith, friends, hope, traditions, courage, gratitude, remembrance, inner-strength and navigating life through uncharted waters.
On this episode, One Bright Star's Executive Director, Erica Fischer and President, Alicia More, discuss who One Bright Star is here to serve and the mission of this Minnesota nonprofit. They talk about the importance of remembering and honoring a lost loved one, how they've been personally touched by the stories that families sharel and how important it is for all of us to show compassion and empathy. They also talk about the hope and courage that families show when it comes to coping and grieving the tremendous loss they have endured. Please join us on this journey to honor and remember those who have touched our lives and left us much too soon.
One Bright Star board member, Becca Roberson, shares the story of her dad, Andy. After his diagnosis of Corticobasal degeneration, Becca talks about the life and loss her family faced and shares the memories of a man she held so dear.
On our inaugural episode, we talk with one of the founding mothers of One Bright Star, Linda Janavaras, who, in 1995, lost her fifteen year old son John to a meningitis outbreak in Mankato, Minnesota. Linda discusses John's life and her family's ongoing journey to remember, celebrate and pay tribute to her son's memory and to help others cope with the death of a child.