Mom Deconstructed Podcast

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This week Liz and Kate are talking about the recent turn of events in all our lives, COVID-19. Listen as they discuss how it has affected their lives, what’s changed, and ways they are coping.

MORE FROM MOM DECONSTRUCTED: Leave a review on iTunes here. | Sign up for our newsletter here. | Follow Mom Deconstructed on Facebook. | Follow Mom Deconstructed on Instagram. | Follow Mom Deconstructed on Twitter. |

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This week we are talking with Rachel Bailey. Rachel opens up about the importance of prioritizing, failure, and being vulnerable.

MORE FROM RACHEL: Rachel Bailey (Website) | Rachel’s Stay Calm Guide | Follow Rachel on Facebook | Follow Rachel on Instagram |

This might be our last episode for a while, due to the changes taking place at home with the spread of the Coronavirus. Please, stay in touch. Visit our website (www.momdeconstructed.com) and sign up for our newsletters. We share things we're doing, reading, and listening to and any resources we're finding useful. We'll also keep you up to date on new projects as things evolve. Stay well. Reach out. We are in this together.

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This week we are talking with Denise Roland. Denise discusses why she wrote her book, the importance of eye contact, and setting boundaries on technology for ourselves.

MORE FROM DENISE: Denise Roland (Website) | Please, Look up at Me by Denise Roland (Book) | FOX News Segment about Please, Look up at Me | Follow Denise on Instagram |

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This week we are deconstructing our conversation from last week with Maggie Quinlan.

This week we will share our highs and lows of our lives and of social media.

MORE FROM MARGARET: Johnson Quinlan Research | You’re Doing It Wrong! Mothering, media & medical expertise by Bethany Johnson & Margaret Quinlan (Book) - 30% Discount Code: 02AAAA17 | Follow Maggie & Bethany on Twitter | Follow Maggie & Bethany on Facebook | Follow Maggie & Bethany on Instagram |

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This week we are talking with Margaret Quinlan. Maggie discusses research with Bethany Johnson that led to their book, the ways social media can positively influence mothering, and, of course, the negatives social media can bring.

MORE FROM MARGARET: Johnson Quinlan Research | You’re Doing It Wrong! Mothering, media & medical expertise by Bethany Johnson & Margaret Quinlan (Book) - 30% Discount Code: 02AAAA17 | Follow Maggie & Bethany on Twitter | Follow Maggie & Bethany on Facebook | Follow Maggie & Bethany on Instagram |

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This week we are deconstructing our episode from last week with Kristy Rodriguez. Listen today as we talk about our highs and lows, navigating loss with kids and a holistic approach to health.

MORE FROM KRISTY: Pure Nurture Podcast | Pure Nurture (Website) | Follow Kristy on Instagram | Follow Kristy on Facebook |

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This week we are talking with Kristy Rodriguez of the podcast, Pure Nurture. Tune in as Kristy discusses losing her dad, postpartum depression & the importance of a holistic approach to our own healthcare.

MORE FROM KRISTY: Pure Nurture Podcast | Pure Nurture (Website) | Follow Kristy on Instagram | Follow Kristy on Facebook |

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This week we are deconstructing our episode from last week with Lara Schulte of Generation.Mom. This week we'll be sharing our highs & lows, the ups and downs of early pregnancy, and what we took away from talking with Lara.

MORE FROM LARA: Generation.Mom (Podcast & Community) | Follow Lara on Instagram | Follow Generation.Mom on Instagram | Follow Generation.Mom on Facebook |

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Listen as Lara shares:

Struggling with the balance of mom life and work life.
How miscarriage has impacted her life.
The uncertainty of the first trimester.
How this impacted her husband.
Her feelings of anger after miscarriage.
Finding out she was pregnant for the fourth time.
The need for connection.
Benefits of publicly sharing about her miscarriage.

LINKS FROM SHOW:

Lara’s Miscarriage Post (Instagram)

Generation.Mom (Podcast & Community)

MORE FROM LARA:

Generation.Mom (Podcast & Community)

Follow Lara on Instagram

Follow Generation.Mom on Instagram

Follow Generation.Mom on Facebook

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This week we are deconstructing our episode from last week with Hope O. Baker. If you haven't listened, go back and download Episode 85. We will delve into highs and lows and changing perspectives in life and in motherhood

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This week we are talking with Hope O. Baker Listen as Hope shares her story of being a birth mother and the consequences of that decision.

Listen as Hope shares:

Learning she was pregnant at the age of 21.
Closed v. open adoption.
Why she chose an open adoption.
Finding her son’s forever family.
Her birth story with her son.
How her needs changed after her son was born.
Spiraling out of control after her son’s birth.
Her reasons for writing her book.
Stigmas of being a birth mother.

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This week we are deconstructing our episode from last week from Ericka Young. If you haven't listened to the episode yet, go back and download Episode 83. This week we will be catching up on our highs and lows and chatting about money in our families.

Listen as Liz & Kate share:

High: Giving kids more autonomy.
High: Dividing up the household chore load.
Tips for teaching kids about money.
Communicating with our partners about household finances.
For the LOVE of Spreadsheets!

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This week we are talking with Ericka Young. Ericka shares there is nothing that can prepare you for parenting teens, how goals can lead to successful budgeting, and the importance of open communication with your partner.

Listen as Ericka shares how:

Parenting teenagers have less resources than toddlers.
She has learned to “let go”.
She’s adjusted to having one child out of the home at college.
She and her husband got out of $100,000 debt in 5 years.
It’s possible to get out of debt by outlining goals.
Importance of communicating with your partner about money.
Looking back on your expenses to create a budget is key.
Tips to raising financially responsible children.
Introducing the concept of savings to young children.
To recover from overspending.
Setting small goals can get you a long way.

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This week I'm joined by Sara Topping, from our first ever episode(!), to deconstruct our episode from last week with Jennifer Summerfeldt. If you haven't listened, go back and listen to Episode 81. This week we will be sharing our highs & lows, and making informed choices about birth, and support throughout the birthing & postpartum to help cope with trauma.

MORE FROM SARA: Episode 01: Mom Deconstructed | Follow Sara on Instagram | East End Birth Network, Inc. |

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For our full show notes: Visit our Episode Webpage

This week we are talking with Jennifer Summerfeldt. Jennifer holds an MA in Counselling Psychology and has nearly two decades of experience in maternal health and psychology. In addition to being a counsellor and a coach, Jennifer has also been a childbirth advocate, maternal educator, doula, midwifery apprentice, and published writer. She uses her expertise and voice to help advance the dialogue on motherhood, mental health, and healing. Listen as Jennifer shares her birth stories, healing from birth trauma, and support she hopes all birthing women receive.

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While Liz is out with her newest addition to her beautiful family, Amanda Rowe is co-hosting this episode with me. Amanda was featured in Episode 55. In case you missed that episode, Amanda is a freelance writer, an academic administrator, an amateur chef, a travel enthusiast, a blogger, and a book hoarder. Her first children's book If There Never Was a You was recently released. Amanda and I will deconstruct our episode from last week with Debra Fox Gansenberg. If you haven't listened to that, go back and download last week's episode. This week we will be talking about our highs and lows, moms only being as happy as their least happy child, and some parenting pitfalls we see.

MORE FROM AMANDA: Amanda’s Website | Amanda’s Book: If There Never Was a You | Follow Amanda on Facebook | Follow Amanda on Instagram |

MORE FROM DEBRA: Debra’s Website | How To Raise Perfectly Imperfect Kids—And Be Ok With It by Lisa Sugarman & Debra Fox Gansenberg (Book) | Follow Debra on Instagram |

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This week we are talking with Debra Fox Gansenberg. Debra Fox Gansenberg, MSW, LICSW is the founder and owner of New Beginnings Counseling Service P.C. located around the North Shore of Boston. She has a 25-year history working in the mental health field as a skilled clinical psychotherapist and business owner specializing in individuals, couples, group, and family therapy. Debra has also been the Director of School Services for NBCS for 20+ years and she has customized and implemented school-based counseling services for several schools, Pre-K through 12th grade. She received her counseling degree from Simmons College School of Social Work. She lives north of Boston with her husband and three sons. In addition, she recently released the book How To Raise Perfectly Imperfect Kids—And Be Ok With It with Lisa Sugarman. Debra shares her insight on what the biggest struggles of today's parents are and ways to reduce anxiety & stress in our children

MORE FROM DEBRA: Debra’s Website | How To Raise Perfectly Imperfect Kids—And Be Ok With It by Lisa Sugarman & Debra Fox Gansenberg (Book) | Follow Debra on Instagram |

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We are back! With the arrival of Liz’s baby #4 we took a few weeks off from recording (thank you to all our past guests who helped us with the last 7 episodes). This week we are back and checking in with Liz and the arrival of baby Teddy.

For our full show notes: Visit our Episode Webpage

Listen as Liz shares how:

The transition from three to four kids is going.
Sleep: still rough, even the fourth time around.
Her birth story with Teddy
What she wishes she could tell her pregnant self.

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This week, we're hearing from Lisa Sugarman, Katie Rössler, Amanda Rowe, Alison Donaghey, Valerie Friedlander, Stacey Porter, Carrie Sharpe & Kate as they answer the question: What do you wish you could change about our current mom culture?

Listen to guests: Lisa Sugarman from Episode 69Katie Rössler from Episode 49Amanda Rowe from Episode 55Alison Donaghey from Episode 65Valerie Friedlander from Episode 22Stacey Porter from Episode 32Carrie Sharpe from Episode 07Kate (One of your Mom Deconstructed Co-Hosts)

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This week, we're hearing from Carrie Sharpe, Heather Vickery, Kate & Liz as they answer the question: How can someone make you feel more appreciated and honored?

Listen to guests: Carrie Sharpe from Episode 07Heather Vickery from Episode 28Kate (Mom Deconstructed Co-Host)Liz (Your Other Mom Deconstructed Co-Host)

MORE FROM OUR GUESTS: Carrie Sharpe | Heather Vickery | Liz Sanicola | Kate Turza |

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This week, we're hearing from Jen Dary, Kate & Liz as they answer the question: Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?

Listen to guests: Jen Dary from Episode 41Kate (Mom Deconstructed Co-Host)Liz (Your Other Mom Deconstructed Co-Host)

MORE FROM OUR GUESTS: Jen Dary | Liz Sanicola | Kate Turza |

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This week, we're hearing from Lisa Sugarman, Amanda Rowe, Alison Donaghey, Jen Dary, Carrie Sharpe, Heather Vickery & Katie Rössler as they answer the question: What do you want to teach your kids about living outside their comfort zones and trying new things?

Listen to guests: Lisa Sugarman from Episode 69Amanda Rowe from Episode 55Alison Donaghey from Episode 65Jen Dary from Episode 41Carrie Sharpe from Episode 07Heather Vickery from Episode 28Katie Rössler from Episode 49MORE FROM OUR GUESTS: Lisa Sugarman | Amanda Rowe | Alison Donaghey | Jen Dary | Carrie Sharpe | Heather Vickery | Katie Rössler |

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This week, we're hearing from Katie Rössler, Amanda Rowe, Valerie Friedlander, Jen Dary, Stacey Porter and Heather Vickery as they answer the question: What limiting beliefs or thoughts do I need to release in order to become comfortable asking for help?

Listen to guests: Katie Rössler from Episode 49Amanda Rowe from Episode 55Valerie Friedlander from Episode 22Jen Dary from Episode 41Stacey Porter from Episode 32Heather Vickery from Episode 28

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This week, we're hearing from Lisa Sugarman, Stacey Porter, Kate & Liz as we answer the question... What words do you want people to use to describe you? Why do you value those things?

Listen to guests: Lisa Sugarman from Episode 69Stacey Porter from Episode 32Kate (Your Mom Deconstructed co-host)Liz (Your other Mom Deconstructed co-host)

MORE FROM OUR GUESTS: Lisa Sugarman’s Website | How To Raise Perfectly Imperfect Kids—And Be Ok With It by Lisa Sugarman (Book) | Stacey Porter’s Website | Follow Stacey on Facebook |

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This week we are hear from past guests as they answer the question: What are some of the things—messages, behaviors, beliefs—you learned from your parents that you would like to keep, and what are some you’d like to change, do better, or different?

Listen to guests: Alison Donaghey from Episode 65Valerie Friedlander from Episode 22Liz (Mom Deconstructed co-host)Kate (Your other Mom Deconstructed co-host)

MORE FROM OUR GUESTS: Alison’s Website; Domino Thinking | Alison’s #MyPart Course - Use Code MOMWORTHY for 10% off | Valerie’s Website | Follow Valerie on Facebook |

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This week we are deconstructing our episode from last week with Lisa Sugarman. If you haven't listened, go back and download Episode 69. Stay tuned to this week as we talk about the importance of being the safe haven for our children, the art of biting our tongue, and that it's OK to be IMPERFECT.

MORE FROM LISA: Lisa’s Website | It Is What It Is: Lisa’s Nationally Syndicated humor column | LIFE: It Is What It Is, Untying Parent Anxiety: 18 Myths That Have You in Knots—And How to Get Free by Lisa Sugarman (Book) | How To Raise Perfectly Imperfect Kids—And Be Ok With It by Lisa Sugarman (Book) | Follow Lisa on Facebook | Follow Lisa on Instagram | Follow Lisa on Twitter |

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This week we are talking with Lisa Sugarman. She writes the nationally syndicated humor column It Is What It Is and is the author of LIFE: It Is What It Is, Untying Parent Anxiety: 18 Myths That Have You in Knots—And How to Get Free, and How To Raise Perfectly Imperfect Kids—And Be Ok With It. Lisa is a regular contributor on GrownAndFlown, This Mama Wines, MommingHubb, More Content Now, Wickedlocal.com, and Care.com. Her work has also appeared in TIME Magazine’s TIME for Parents, on LittleThings, Mamalode, 50 Shades of Aging, and on PBS Kids. She’s the founder and moderator of The Vomit Booth, the popular Facebook parenting group where parents go to bond over the madness of parenthood. Lisa lives with her husband and two daughters just north of Boston in a tiny coastal town of twenty thousand people crammed onto a teensy peninsula. Lisa shares the importance of accepting that we will make mistakes as parents, tips for letting go of the judgement we all feel as parents, and taking a breath before reacting.

MORE FROM LISA: Lisa’s Website | It Is What It Is: Lisa’s Nationally Syndicated humor column | LIFE: It Is What It Is, Untying Parent Anxiety: 18 Myths That Have You in Knots—And How to Get Free by Lisa Sugarman (Book) | How To Raise Perfectly Imperfect Kids—And Be Ok With It by Lisa Sugarman (Book) | Follow Lisa on Facebook | The Vomit Booth - Lisa’s Facebook Group | Follow Lisa on Instagram | Follow Lisa on Twitter

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This week we are deconstructing our episode with Yvonne Marcus from last week. If you haven't listened, go back and download Episode 67. This week we will be starting with our highs and lows, then delving into tips that help us manage our home and family life, and sharing the mental load.

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This week we are talking with Yvonne Marcus. Yvonne Marcus is a home management expert who teaches tech savvy individuals how to integrate the Agile Framework into their home. After spending 10 years working in operations and project management for a television production company, Yvonne moved from Los Angeles to Asheville, NC with her family. She enjoys the occasional glass of red wine, gluten free caramel bars, and dancing. Yvonne shares how she was frustrated with having to do #allthethings and incorporating the Agile Framework into her home, making everyone accountable for family goals & projects.

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This week we are deconstructing our episode from last week with Alison Donaghey. If you haven't listened, go back and download Episode 65. This week we will chat about the damaging effects of negative self talk & how we silence it, and the importance (or unimportance) of putting labels on things. As usual, we share our highs & lows from the week.

MORE FROM ALISON: Alison’s Website; Domino Thinking | Think Opposite: Using the Domino Effect to Change Your Business, Change the World by Alison Donaghey (Book) | Alison’s #MyPart Course - Use Code MOMWORTHY for 10% off | Follow Alison on Facebook | Follow Alison on Instagram | Follow Alison on Pinterest | Follow Alison on Twitter |

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This week we are talking with Alison Donaghey. Alison reflects on what it was like to be a single mom at the age of 20, choosing to live in a freedom state rather than as a victim, and the importance of self worth.

MORE FROM ALISON: Alison’s Website; Domino Thinking | Think Opposite: Using the Domino Effect to Change Your Business, Change the World by Alison Donaghey (Book) | Alison’s #MyPart Course - Use Code MOMWORTHY for 10% off | Follow Alison on Facebook | Follow Alison on Instagram | Follow Alison on Pinterest | Follow Alison on Twitter |

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This week we are deconstructing our episode from last week with Lily Nichols. If you haven't listened to it, go back and download Episode 63. It's chock full of real-life advice for incorporating real food into your family's diet. This week we will be talking about our highs/lows, our own angst with feeding our children, and what we've done to try to have a less stressful eating experience in our households.

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This week we are talking with Lily Nichols. Lily is a Registered Dietitian/Nutritionist, Certified Diabetes Educator, researcher, and author with a passion for evidence-based prenatal nutrition. Her work is known for being research-focused, thorough, and unapologetically critical of outdated dietary guidelines. She is the author of two bestselling books, Real Food for Pregnancy and Real Food for Gestational Diabetes. Lily discusses the importance of unprocessed foods in family nutrition, tips for transitioning to a real food diet, and tips for picky eaters.

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This week we are deconstructing our episode with Dayna Kurtz from last week. If you haven't listened, go back and download Episode 61. This week we are delving into our highs and lows, our frustrations with maternity leave in the US, and resources that we think you might find helpful as you navigate all stages of motherhood.

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This week we are talking with Dayna Kurtz. Dayna is a psychotherapist in private practice and serves as Director of the Anna Keefe Women's Center in Manhattan. She earned her Masters in Social Work from Columbia University and completed postgraduate studies in psychodynamic psychotherapy at The Training Institute for Mental Health. With a particular interest in the intersection between emotional and physical health, she also hold a personal training certification from the National Academy of Sports Medicine, with an additional certification in training pre and postnatal clients. She is the author of Mother Matters: A Holistic Guide to Being a Happy, Healthy Mom and The Total Body Cure for Women and is a contributor to The Doctor's Book of Natural Remedies. Listen to Dayna as she shares the importance of mothercare, approaching differences in “mommy wars” with curiosity rather than judgement, and learning to check in with our internal voices as a mom.

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This week on the Mom Deconstructed podcast, we are deconstructing our episode from last week with Cathryn Monroe. If you haven't listened, go back and download Episode 59 to hear about self reflection, her inner journey to becoming a more confident mom and tips from her book, Spilt Milk Yoga. Today, we're sharing our highs and lows, being consistent-ish, letting go of the past and our own self-reflections on motherhood.

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This week we are talking with author, Cathryn Monro. Her life, training and work combine her creative drive, a commitment to meaningful education, self-inquiry and group learning processes, and yoga and meditation practices. She wrote Spilt Milk Yoga: A Guided Self-Inquiry To Finding Your Own Wisdom, Joy, And Purpose Through Motherhood. Cathryn lives with her husband and two daughters in Wellington, New Zealand. She rates mothering as by far the most challenging, creative, important and fulfilling of jobs. Listen to Cathryn as she talks about the importance of practicing self inquiry and acknowledging our own feelings, not just our children’s.

MORE FROM CATHRYN. - Cathryn’s Website. - Cathryn’s Book: Spilt Milk Yoga. - Cathryn’s Facebook Group: Spilt Milk Yoga. - Follow Cathryn on Facebook. - Follow Cathryn on Instagram.

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This week we are deconstructing our episode from last week with Simone Davies. If you haven't heard, go back and download Episode 57 to hear about incorporating Montessori principles into your family dynamic. Stay tuned as we talk about our highs and lows, how we've used scaffolding to teach our kids skills, the education of families and being in tune with your kids.

MORE FROM SIMONESimone’s Blog: The Montessori NotebookJacaranda Tree MontessoriSimone’s Book: The Montessori ToddlerFollow Simone on FacebookFollow Simone on InstagramFollow Simone on TwitterFollow Simone on Pinterest

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This week we are talking with Simone Davies. Simone is the author of “The Montessori Toddler”, a comprehensive guide to raising toddlers in a Montessori way. The book is based on her nearly 15 years experience working with toddlers as an AMI Montessori teacher in Sydney and in Amsterdam. Simone currently runs parent-child Montessori classes in Amsterdam at her school Jacaranda Tree Montessori. She also has a popular blog, “The Montessori Notebook” and is mother to two young adults. Listen to Simone as she talks about how teenagers and toddlers are surprisingly similar, what the Montessori model of education is and how to incorporate it into your parenting.

MORE FROM SIMONE. Simone’s Blog: The Montessori Notebook. - Jacaranda Tree Montessori. - Simone’s Book: The Montessori Toddler. - Follow Simone on Facebook. - Follow Simone on Instagram. - Follow Simone on Twitter. - Follow Simone on Pinterest

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This week we are deconstructing our episode from last week with Amanda Rowe. If you haven’t listened to that one, go back and download Episode 55. As a refresher Amanda is a writer who navigated both divorce and getting the proper care for her daughter’s Crohn’s disease with strength. Listen this week as we discuss our highs and lows, putting dreams on hold when we become moms, and keeping a positive attitude, even when things aren’t so rosy.

MORE FROM AMANDAAmanda’s WebsiteAmanda’s Book: If There Never Was a YouFollow Amanda on FacebookFollow Amanda on Instagram

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This week we are talking with Amanda Rowe. Amanda Rowe is a freelance writer, an academic administrator, an amateur chef, a travel enthusiast, a blogger, and a book hoarder. Her first children's book If There Never Was a You was recently released. Listen this week as Amanda shares her journey through divorce, co-parenting,and parenting a child with Crohn’s Disease.

LINKS FROM SHOW:

Amanda’s Book: If There Never Was a You

My Tribe: Blog Post

And the Oscar Goes To…: Blog Post

MORE FROM AMANDA

Amanda’s Website

Amanda’s Book: If There Never Was a You

Follow Amanda on Facebook

Follow Amanda on Instagram

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This week we are deconstructing our episode from last week with Angie Martin. If you haven't listened to that episode, go ahead and download Episode 53. This week we will be talking about our highs and lows, confidence in ourselves as mothers, and the "mom rhetoric" and were we fit in (or do we?).

MORE FROM ANGIEAngie’s WebsiteAngie’s Facebook Group: The Joy VillageFollow Angie on FacebookFollow Angie on InstagramFollow Angie on Pinterest

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This week we are talking with Angie Martin. Angie Martin is mom to two and wife to one. In addition, she is an attorney of 11 years and a Certified Life Purpose and Leadership Coach for Mamas. Her coaching is focused around JOY and her primary goal is to partner with you on your journey to let go of comparisonitis and guilt, and start feeling more confident and secure in who you are as a mom. Angie shares her struggles with mom comparison, birthing herself as a mom, and the effect of social media on parental confidence.

MORE FROM ANGIEAngie’s WebsiteAngie’s Facebook Group: The Joy VillageFollow Angie on FacebookFollow Angie on InstagramFollow Angie on Pinterest

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This week we are deconstructing our episode from last week with Denielle Elliston. If you haven't listened, go back and download Episode 51. This week we will be talking about our highs and lows, support and resources for infertility, and the power of being honest.

MORE FROM DENIELLE

Shop Love for Mama

Shop Gifts of Love

Follow Denielle on Facebook

Follow Love For Mama on Instagram

Follow Gifts of Love Company on Instagram

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This week we are talking with Denielle Elliston. After a long road of infertility, she’s a mom to three young children. In addition to growing her family, Denielle is growing Love For Mama, a place to find meaningful gifts for all stages of motherhood. When Denielle isn’t chasing around her three kids under four, you can find her squeezing in a workout in her kitchen. In her “downtime” she loves coffee, wine, podcasts, reading, and cooking SkinnyTaste recipes. Listen this week as Denielle shares her story of infertility, giving birth to her twins, and her inspiration for starting her business.

MORE FROM DENIELLE

Shop Love for Mama

Shop Gifts of Love

Follow Denielle on Facebook

Follow Love For Mama on Instagram

Follow Gifts of Love Company on Instagram

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This week we are deconstructed our episode with Katie Rössler. If you haven't listened, go back and download Episode 49. Which means....drumroll please...this is episode 50! We'll be tackling our highs and lows, making space for feelings and being honest in and about intimate relationships.

MORE FROM KATIEKatie’s Website From Stay At Home Mom to Chief Household Officer Mom WebsiteFollow Katie on FacebookFollow Katie on InstagramFollow Katie on Pinterest

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This week we are talking with Katie Rössler. Katie is a licensed professional counselor from the USA living in Munich, Germany. She has over 10 years experience working with individuals, couples and families on improving their relationships and enjoyment of life. After four years of being a stay at home mom, she created The Chief Household Officer Academy which teaches and empowers moms to run their households like entrepreneurs. Katie has two girls, 4 and 2, and loves to be outside with her family. In this episode, she shares her feelings of failure after having an emergency cesarean section, losing her mother suddenly and grieving as a mother herself.

MORE FROM KATIE

Katie’s Website

From Stay At Home Mom to Chief Household Officer Mom Website

Follow Katie on Facebook

Follow Katie on Instagram

Follow Katie on Pinterest

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This week we are deconstructing our last episode with Megan Whitaker and if you haven't listened, go back and download Episode 47. As a refresher she delved into her adventures in natural living and the repercussions she faced, good and bad. Today, we're jumping in to our highs and lows, how we manage our family's health and the crazy things kids pick up or say at school.

Listen as Liz and Kate share:

High: Finding a secret extra bedroom in the house!?High OR Low? Teaching children new athletic skills and lifelong lessons.Natural/Green Living: it’s not black and white, there are lots of versions of incorporating green living into your home.Know your source for information on decision making for your family.Judgment of other moms are reflective of our own insecurities as parents.Our feelings on the healthcare system in the U.S.Wellness of our families: decisions we are privileged enough to be able to make.What our children come home from school saying.How sheltered our children still are.LINKS FROM SHOW:

Shownotes

Reliving our softball days on Instagram.

Updated Food Pyramid: Choose My Plate

Misfits Market

Thrive Market Gives

SPONSORS:

Crate Joy & Real Plans

Patreon: This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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MORE FROM MEGAN

Megan’s Website

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This week we are talking with Megan Whitaker. Megan is a former nurse turned Crunchy, hippie mom of 2. After being a chronically sick kid she finally changed her whole life, healed herself and now helps other families take control of their health and go non-toxic. When she’s not pregnant or constantly breastfeeding, she loves to read and rock climb. Listen as she shares her story of turning "Crunchy", trying to find her mom "tribe”, and turning to research to fuel her alternative lifestyle.

Listen as Megan shares how she:

Has struggled with finding mom friends that share her values.Uses social media as a way to connect with other moms.Focuses on research to fuel her natural lifestyle.Suffered from chronic inflammation and used holistic remedies to ease her symptoms. Believes modern medicine is important, and should be used in conjunction with a holistic lifestyle.Believes baby steps need to be taken towards a more natural lifestyle.Has some simple steps towards a more holistic household.Keeps germs at bay with young children.How she “fights with facts”.Had a beautifully successful homebirth.

QUOTABLES:

“It was really difficult for some people to understand why I was doing things that were more difficult than other people.” - Megan Whitaker

“Any parenting decision, you have to be married to your choice and I need to be able to say why I did it.” - Megan Whitaker

“What we are putting in our bodies and what’s around us really affects our health.” - Megan Whitaker

“Do what you can, where you can and you’ll always be going in the right direction.” - Megan Whitaker

LINKS FROM SHOW:

Westin A. Price - Anti-inflammatory Diet

EWG: Environmental Working Group

EWG: Healthy Living App

EWG: Skin Deep App

Documentary: The Devil We Know

Lead Check Swabs

Ear Doc

SPONSORS:

Crate Joy & Real Plans

MORE FROM MEGAN

Megan’s Website

Follow Megan on Twitter

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Follow Megan on Pinterest

MORE FROM MOM DECONSTRUCTED:

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This week we are deconstructing our episode with Melanie Lippman. If you haven't heard, go back and download Episode 45 to learn about how she listened to her intuition and didn't back down while advocating for her child (even though tears were involved). Tune in today to hear our highs and lows, how we've attempted to put ego aside, and admitting the bad habits that show up in our kids.

Listen as Liz & Kate share:

High: Putting our mom-self out there and it working out!Low: Exhaustion and lack of well-rounded nutrition while growing a human.How we put our ego aside as moms.When our experiences don’t live up to our expectations.Children should have warning lights.Bad habits our children are picking up from us.When we’ve had to advocate for our children.Personal experience with early intervention evaluations & services.Being a passive parent.Braces for a 7 year old?!

LINKS FROM SHOW:

Liz’s Announcement!: Episode 44: Three Sides to Every Story

SPONSORS:

Crate Joy

Real Plans

Patreon: This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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MORE FROM MELANIE

Melanie’s Website

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MORE FROM MOM DECONSTRUCTED:

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This week we are connecting with Melanie Lippman. Melanie shares with us how she and her husband made the decision to have her son evaluated for a sensory processing disorder and navigating the early intervention process as a parent. Melanie is a Long Island based Image Consultant with over 15 years’ experience in the fashion industry. She educates her clients on how to dress for their body and lifestyle by teaching them new ways to wear the clothing hanging in their closet. Melanie feels that when you are confident about how you present yourself you are able to show up and conquer anything the day brings you! (including blow out diapers!).

Listen as Melanie shares how she:Puts her ego aside as a parent to be a more conscious parent.Wishes she could be more present as a parent, and how she’s working towards that.Put the pieces together that her son may have a sensory processing disorder, rather than just “bad behavior”.Made the decision to have her son evaluated by the early intervention program in her school district.Surrounded herself with support and advocates to attend meetings.Found her emotions getting the best of her during the process of evaluation.Her tips for advocating for your child.What she learned about her own sensory issues during this process. QUOTABLES:

“They are who they are, and we just need to get over it.” - Melanie Lippman

“I needed the time to process all the information.” - Melanie Lippman

“When someone is speaking about your kid like he is a specimen, I literally couldn’t speak...If I speak, it will be water works.” - Melanie Lippman

“Sometimes you need to fix something here….as opposed to blaming something else.” - Melanie Lippman

“Be the squeaky wheel...Keep asking the questions.” - Melanie Lippman

LINKS FROM SHOW:

The Awakened Family By Shefali Tsabary Ph.D.

Episode 35: Ayelet Marinovich: The Importance of Play in our Children’s Development.

SPONSORS:

Crate Joy

Real Plans

Patreon: This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

If you would like to become one of our sponsors visit: www.momdeconstructed.com/advertisingand start the conversation!

All our sponsor offers are available on our website. To get all the discounts and perks go to www.momdeconstructed.com/sponsors

MORE FROM MELANIE

Melanie’s Website

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This week, we are deconstructing our episode with Shauna Armitage. If you haven't listened, go back and download episode 43. Quick recap, Shauna is a mom of 4 with kids in all stages and talks about her courageous termination during her third pregnancy, a decision she never imagined she'd have to make. Stay with us as we discuss our highs and lows, the many versions of what a working mom looks like and making decisions with the information you have, without guilt.

Listen as Kate & Liz share:High: Liz has some BIG news!High: Kate’s nerve wracking week comes to an end.What a working mom looks like for us.Separation of work and family - is it working for moms?Decision regret: how we combat it as moms.Hindsight is 20/20, but we make decisions with the information we have now.The importance of us sharing the dark times of our lives.Life is richer when we have friends with diverse experiences.

LINKS FROM SHOW:

Episode 20: Suzanne Brown: Empowering Women to Find “Work-Life Balance”

Badger: A company making “working moms” work. (Longest Shortest Time Podcast)

Badger: A Family-Friendly Workspace

The Double Shift Podcast

Shauna Armitage’s article for Scary Mommy about Violet

Episode 39: Amanda Fairbanks, Finding Space for Herself as a Mother

SPONSORS:

Crate Joy

Real Plans

Patreon: This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

If you would like to become one of our sponsors visit: www.momdeconstructed.com/advertisingand start the conversation!

All our sponsor offers are available on our website. To get all the discounts and perks go to www.momdeconstructed.com/sponsors

MORE FROM SHAUNA

Shauna’s Website: Making Moxie

Grab Your Free Business Clarity Worksheets

Follow Shauna on Twitter

Follow Shauna on Facebook

Follow Shauna on Instagram

Follow Shauna on Pinterest

MORE FROM MOM DECONSTRUCTED:

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This week we are talking with Shauna Armitage. Shauna is a growth consultant , she acts as a CMO for early stage startups looking to make the largest impact on small budgets. As a vocal advocate for women in business, Shauna is on a mission to redefine what it looks like to be a working woman and to support other women in doing the same. She works on all this when she’s not road tripping with her husband and four kids or sipping red wine. This week Shauna shares her courageous story about her journey to being a mother of four. We cover sensitive topics including infant loss and termination, so if you aren't in a place to hear those we suggest you skip this episode and catch up on some others.

Listen as Shauna shares how she:Juggles four children and working.Doesn’t believe separating her work and family life.At her 19 week ultrasound, learned that her third child had severe medical complications.What went into her decision to make the courageous medical decision she did. Doesn’t believe there are two sides to every story, but rather a lot of gray.Finds it important to share her story, even if it’s polarizing.Shared her story on one of the biggest platforms, Scary Mommy.Having other children to care for helped her survive her trauma.Struggled with her emotions and doubts with subsequent pregnancies after her loss.Believes sharing traumatic and hard experiences helps others feel less alone.QUOTABLES:

“Balance. That’s an interesting word. I don’t think there is balance. People ask about the work-life balance, and the truth is, there just isn’t work-life balance.” - Shauna Armitage

“It takes courage to say: No, I can be professional and still incorporate and prioritize my family life.” - Shauna Armitage

“People think this is black and white. It’s absolutely not.” - Shauna Armitage

“Because I’ve had this experience, I think it’s important for me to jump in and have the conversation because a lot of people form an opinion without having this experience themselves.” - Shauna Armitage

“One of the hardest parts of going through something traumatic is that even though you are in pain...life doesn’t stop.” - Shauna Armitage

LINKS FROM SHOW:

Episode 20: Suzanne Brown: Empowering Women to Find “Work-Life Balance”

Shauna’s article for Scary Mommy about Violet

Episode 32: Stacey Porter, A story of Loss and Hope

SPONSORS:

Crate Joy & Real Plans

Patreon: This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

MORE FROM SHAUNA

Shauna’s Website: Making Moxie

Grab Your Free Business Clarity Worksheets

Follow Shauna on Twitter

Follow Shauna on Facebook

Follow Shauna on Instagram

Follow Shauna on Pinterest

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This week we are deconstructing last week's episode with Jen Dary of Beplucky.com. If you haven't listened, be sure to download Episode 41, which is chock full of inspiring insights and positive perspectives despite facing an insane life challenge. Join us this week as we discuss our highs and lows, our words of the year and our hopes for the future.

Listen as Liz and Kate discuss:High: February break bliss.Low: Imposing social norms on your children, is this stifling their creativity?Children being heartbroken by opinions of their peers.Books that we re-read over and over again.Our words for 2019: Trust & Explore.Superpowers we want our children to have.Power of sharing your story.EPISODE LINKS:

Eat, Pray, Love By Elizabeth Gilbert

Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert

Sign up for our newsletter here.

SPONSORS:

Crate Joy

Real Plans

Patreon: This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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All our sponsor offers are available on our website. To get all the discounts and perks go to www.momdeconstructed.com/sponsors

MORE FROM JEN

Jen’s Website

Jen’s Merch

Jen’s Upcoming 2019 So Now You’re a Manager Dates

Follow Be Plucky on Twitter

Follow Be Plucky on Facebook

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MORE FROM MOM DECONSTRUCTED:

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This week we are talking with Jen Dary. Jen is a leadership coach and speaker; she travels across the US teaching workshops, including her popular course, So Now You’re a Manager, which trains new managers across the country for the complex work of herding humans. Jen lives in Berkeley, CA with her husband and two young sons. Listen as she shares her unique motherhood journey, what happened in her life to call on her peers for help, and how she hopes that her children take a page from her book and can talk to anyone regardless of status, race, or language barrier.

Listen as Jen shares how she:Suffered from postpartum depression and how that led to her starting her business.Cherishes her friendships and community.Built her community after a move across the country (hint: she started it herself!).Publicly reached out for help when she was struggling.Plans on writing a memoir about her experience.Recognizes her experience has shaped her life and changed her priorities.Doesn’t let her experience define who she is.Loves the New Year and goal sets at the beginning of each year.Believes we all evolve, regardless of the weight of our “problems”.Incorporated the concept of Shabbat into her family’s monthly routine.Hopes to give her children a superpower.Has a strong relationship with her family, despite living far apart from one another.Finds spontaneity can help her stay present with her kids.Called up a friend’s mom to find out what her “secret” was to have her adult children want to have a close relationship with her. Quotables:

“When in doubt, invite somebody over. We are all waiting to be invited over to somebody’s house.” - Jen Dary

“It’s extremely clarifying. What are we even arguing over?” - Jen Dary

“I had to give up any plans I had for his first year of life and let the family that flew in to help, let my husband help.” - Jen Dary

“Don’t waste any time in your life being afraid.” - Jen Dary

“There is so much we can’t control in life. On some level, what you can control is your state of mind.” - Jen Dary

“I find it really restorative to spend one on one time with one of my kids.” - Jen Dary

LINKS FROM SHOW:

Preemie by Kasie Matthews

Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert

Episode 32: Stacey Porter, A Story of Loss, and of Hope

New Year’s Workbook: Susannah Conway

MORE FROM JEN

Jen’s Website

Follow Jen on Twitter

Follow Be Plucky on Twitter

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This week we are deconstructing our episode with Amanda Fairbanks from last week. Amanda was incredibly honest about her mothering journey and her need for space and the unexpected places she found joy. If you haven't listened, go back and download Episode 39. Join us this week as we revisit our highs and lows and delve into the conflicting emotions of motherhood.

Listen as Liz & Kate discuss:The joy of having your partner be the one who deals with the night time wake ups.Wrangling the after school/after work/dinner making/homework doing chaos.Benefits of limiting screen time for parents.How draining parenting can be.The two extremes of motherhood and where we fit in.Being in touch with ourselves and being unapologetic about what we need.There’s never a right time or enough preparation for having a baby.The importance of modeling behavior for our children. Links from Episode:

Episode 39: Amanda Fairbanks, Finding Space for Herself as a Mother

Reality Tykes, Kate’s Facebook Group

The Sporkful: In Defense of Picky Eaters

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Crate Joy

Patreon: This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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All our sponsor offers are available on our website. To get all the discounts and perks go to www.momdeconstructed.com/sponsors

MORE FROM AMANDA

Amanda’s Website

The SHED Workspace

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MORE FROM MOM DECONSTRUCTED:

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This week we are talking with Amanda Fairbanks a mom, journalist, writer, and part owner of the SHED Workspace. Amanda has worked in the editorial department of The New York Times, as a higher education reporter for The Huffington Post, and as a staff writer at the The East Hampton Star. Her writing has appeared in The New York Times, The Boston Globe, Newsweek, The Atlantic, and The San Francisco Chronicle, among other publications. A graduate of Smith College and a former Teach for America corps member, she has two master’s degrees from Columbia University’s Graduate School of Journalism. .Earlier this fall, she and two friends launched The SHED Workspace. It's a co-working space for women on the East End of Long Island. Amanda is transparent about being career driven in her 20s, her need for space and introspection, and the importance of women supporting women. Listen as Amanda shares how she:Finds her personality conflicts with the motherhood “ideal”.Decided she wanted to become a mom after marrying her husband.Doesn’t like pregnancy, but loved breastfeeding.Needs a lot of alone time and space, which seems to conflict with being a mom.Can’t have it all, all the time.Finds that she carries most of the “mental load” of parenting in her house.Identifies herself as an introverted extrovert.Writing a book looks very different as a mother than previously.Incorporates her need for space into each day.Benefits from going away alone.Finds support from other women, and how that influenced her decision to start The SHED.Quotables:

“When is this going to be over? Because I’m not good at this.” - Amanda Fairbanks

“Needing space and time for yourself is very much in conflict with being a mother.” - Amanda Fairbanks

“It’s this push/pull. You’ve never been loved like that in your life, there’s true beauty in that...And, then at times it feels like a real conflict.” - Amanda Fairbanks

“If you want something done, ask a mother.” - Amanda Fairbanks

“We are still living in this particular time that we have access to so much, but there is still tremendous strength from coming together.” - Amanda Fairbanks

LINKS FROM SHOW:

Becoming by Michelle Obama

Calm App

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Crate Joy

Patreon: This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

If you would like to become one of our sponsors visit: www.momdeconstructed.com/advertisingand start the conversation!

All our sponsor offers are available on our website. To get all the discounts and perks go to www.momdeconstructed.com/sponsors

MORE FROM AMANDA

Amanda’s Website

The SHED Workspace

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This week we are deconstructing our episode with Enid Viana from last week. If you haven't listened, go back and download Episode 37. As a refresher, Enid is raising three children, two businesses and in the process of divorcing her husband. She was honest about her struggles and how she "does it all" with help. This week we will discuss our highs and lows, how we handle our anxiety and that of our children, and keeping relationships with family members strong (even if we don't see eye to eye on everything).

Listen as Liz & Kate discuss:The joy of kids demolishing their dinner and asking for more.Odd things triggering emotions that you thought were dealt with long ago. Working through our “stuff” and trying to explain our actions and reactions to our kids in a way that is approachable.Nurturing relationships and memories with grandparents when a life choice might get in the way.Motivating kids to do the hard thing, visiting an ailing relative even when it feels like a chore.“What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.” - letting go of the small things.The more people who love and influence our kids, the better off they will be. Developmental shifts, how kids handle anxiety and stress.Trying new things as family to gives kids the confidence to try things for themselves.Our realm of experience is so huge in comparison to theirs, no wonder they have questions.Experiences and play are how our kids learn! It’s pretty cool to see the world through the lense of our kids experience.This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

If you would like to become one of our sponsors visit: www.momdeconstructed.com/advertising and start the conversation!

All our sponsor offers are available on our website. To get all the discounts and perks go to www.momdeconstructed.com/sponsors

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This week we are talking with Enid Viana, an ex Wall Streeter who left the demanding world of finance to build her family. Listen as she shares her tumultuous journey through motherhood and how she finally gained the control over her life that she so craved.

Listen as Enid shares how she:

Relies on help to with her daily mothering tasks.Explaining and guiding her young children through divorce.Suffers from anxiety, how she copes, and how she’s modeling for her children.Incorporates working into her day while maintaining her “mom” hours.Manages differences in parenting in her divorce.Navigated an unexpected pregnancy while her marriage was on the rocks.There are perks to being single again.Her children are challenging her to be the best she should be.Leans on her parents and nurtures her children’s relationship with their grandparents.Quotables:

“You want your children to see your vulnerabilities.” - Enid Viana

“There’s a lot that goes into the day. It’s like a tightrope walk.” - Enid Viana

“Kids can sense, the entire vibe has changed....Happy parents, happy children.” - Enid Viana

“As mothers we lose ourselves...you give up so much to have children. We want it all. It’s so hard.” - Enid Viana

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Real Plans

Patreon: This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

If you would like to become one of our sponsors visit: www.momdeconstructed.com/advertisingand start the conversation!

All our sponsor offers are available on our website. To get all the discounts and perks go to www.momdeconstructed.com/sponsors

MORE FROM ENID

Hamptons Moms Website

Follow Enid on Instagram

MORE FROM MOM DECONSTRUCTED:

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Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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MORE FROM LIZ:

Mom...In The Works

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This week we are deconstructing our episode from last with with Ayelet Marinovich. If you haven't listened to that one, go back and download Episode 35. As a refresher, Ayelet has a beautiful voice, can be found on her own podcast, Strength in Words, singing her guests in, where she educates parents on the importance of play and how easy it is to incorporate into our lives. Listen today as we talk about our highs and lows, the importance of community for new parents, and how play shows up in our children's lives.

Listen as Kate & Liz discuss:

Liz’s low - winter introspection and the ripple effect on her children.
Kate’s low - battles with four year olds: is it worth it to stand our ground?
Benefits of gathering with other moms with children around the same age as yours.
How to create your own playgroup.
The pitfalls of scrolling Instagram/Facebook as a new mom (and, even as a seasoned one!)
Disappointment when expectations aren’t met.
The art of following up to create the elusive “mom friends”
How the word “play” is intimidating, but YOU ARE ALREADY DOING IT!

Links from Show:

Mindy Kalig’s Instagram Post about what a Relationship REALLY looks like

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Real Plans

This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

If you would like to become one of our sponsors visit: www.momdeconstructed.com/advertisingand start the conversation!

All our sponsor offers are available on our website. To get all the discounts and perks go to www.momdeconstructed.com/sponsors

MORE FROM AYELET

Strength in Words Website

Ayelet’s Book: Understanding Your Baby

Follow Ayelet on Twitter

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Follow Ayelet on Pinterest

MORE FROM MOM DECONSTRUCTED:

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MORE FROM KATE:

Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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MORE FROM LIZ:

Mom...In The Works

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This week we chat with Ayelet Marinovich, she is a pediatric speech-language pathologist who works with families with infants and toddlers. In addition, she is the founder of Strength In Words, a podcast and educational resource providing access to high-quality, evidence-based resources for parents, caregivers and professionals with infants and toddlers of all developmental levels, so they can have peace of mind they are supporting their children to the best of their ability. She is the bestselling author of the book "Understanding Your Baby: A Week-By-Week Development and Activity Guide For Playing With Your Baby From Birth to 12 Months," a singer and recording artist, and, perhaps most importantly, an imperfect mother of two. Tune in as we discuss how her training as a speech language pathologist has helped her mothering, helped her build community, and eased other parent’s minds on what play looks like for an infant/toddler.

Listen as Ayelet shares how she:

Struggles with sharing her time and attention between her two children.
Incorporated her children into her work life.
Had a built-in community and infrastructure with her first child in the UK, and how she had to create her own here in the U.S.
Created her own playgroup to continue building her support system and community.
Teaches parents what play looks like for infants and toddlers (HINT: It’s not as hard as you think!)
Uses the first rule of improv (Yes. And?) to direct play with babies.
Shares the everyday things we are doing that are already supporting our children’s development.
Uses the holistic learning model to identify delays, rather than comparing one skill
The importance of teaching our children self-regulation & reflection.

Quotables:

“I just needed to accept that I wasn’t going to be able to give each of them my all. And, that’s actually fine.” - Ayelet Marinovich

“I thought I was the all-knowing parent, until I became a parent. There were huge moments of overwhelm, vulnerability, it didn’t matter what training I had.” - Ayelet Marinovich

“There is no such thing as a parenting expert. YOU are the expert as the parent.” - Ayelet Marinovich

“Go out and find good information, that’s not from your local Facebook group.” - Ayelet Marinovich

Links from Show:

National Childbirth Trust

Early Intervention: Support Services for Delays in children under 3

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Real Plans

This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

If you would like to become one of our sponsors visit: www.momdeconstructed.com/advertisingand start the conversation!

All our sponsor offers are available on our website. To get all the discounts and perks go to www.momdeconstructed.com/sponsors

MORE FROM AYELET

Strength in Words Website

Ayelet’s Book: Understanding Your Baby

Follow Ayelet on Twitter

Follow Ayelet on Facebook

Follow Ayelet on Instagram

Follow Ayelet on Pinterest

MORE FROM MOM DECONSTRUCTED:

Support this podcast on Patreon.

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MORE FROM KATE:

Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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MORE FROM LIZ:

Mom...In The Works

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This week we are looking back at our podcast in 2018 and sharing what we envision for our future in 2019.

Listen as Kate & Liz discuss:

How to support our podcast.
Email usyour ideas for the show.
Find us on Instagramand Facebook.

WAYS TO SPONSOR US:

Crate Joy

Real Plans

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Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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Mom...In The Works

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This week we are deconstructing last week's episode with Stacey Porter. If you haven't listened to that episode, go back and download Episode 32. Stacey spoke about the loss of her daughter, Delilah, and how the support she found during her darkest times helped her create The Tangerine Owl Project. Listen in this week as we talk about our highs and lows and what we took away from Stacey's episode.

Listen as Kate & Liz discuss:

Kate’s high: first trimester teacher conferences
Liz’s low (or high?): being sick during the holiday season
Opening yourself up and being vulnerable to receive help.
Reaching out to a friend (or acquaintance) that you share a common experience with to offer support.
Differences in support for postpartum families in Europe and United States.
Places to look for support if you are navigating a difficult time.

Links from Show:

Episode 32: Stacey Porter, A Story of Loss, Hope

The Tangerine Owl Project

ACOG’s Redesigns Postpartum Care

Join Kate’s Facebook Group, Reality Tykes

Sit in a circle. Talk to other pregnant women. Save your baby’s life?: Vox’s The Impact Podcast

East End Birth Network’s Monthly Birth Circle

Postpartum Support International

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Crate Joy

This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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MORE FROM STACEY

The Tangerine Owl Project

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Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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Mom...In The Works

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This week we chat with Stacey Porter. Stacey has been dedicated to efforts centered around supporting families who have suffered infant loss and traumatic birth since 2013. She is founder of the Tangerine Owl Project, a nonprofit devoted to offering peer support to these families, started in memory of her daughter after a NICU loss in 2012. Stacey is deeply invested in efforts to support maternal mental health as it intertwines so greatly with traumatic birth and bereavement experiences for these families. She works as a contractor with 2020 Mom leading their volunteer program and a handful of other projects, She sits on the board of directors for local non-profit Beyond the Baby Blues which offers clinical group support to women suffering from perinatal mood and anxiety disorders and serves on the bereavement committee for the Mothers Milk Bank of the Western Great Lakes. Stacey is a member of the National Perinatal Association and Preemie Parent Alliance and has collaborated on projects for patient education including online curriculum for staff on psychosocial support for NICU parents. Additionally, she has been a contributing author to two book anthologies focused on infant loss and resilience. Listen as Stacey discusses her loss, being a mother to two young children during the loss, and how she honors her daughter with the Tangerine Owl Project.

Listen as Stacey shares how she:

Struggles with the balance independence and boundaries with her kids.
The worry about how our mental health and the things we don’t say can affect our kids.
How she kept herself afloat after losing her daughter, Delilah.
Having small children at the time of the loss of their third child, how they grieved, coped and began to make their way out of the darkest times.
Even with lots of support, she still needed a lifeline with someone who just understood what she was going through without having to explain all the details.
There is no timeline for grief. There are expectations of society after a loss, but it isn’t always linear.
After going through a loss, you are shattered. How to figure out how things have changed and how to move forward from there.
As a support person, do your best to be encouraging but try your best not to set an expectation or something the person going through the loss can berate themselves for later. Notice and comment on the small things they’re accomplishing or doing well.
She has been able to use her experience with loss and bereavement in order to support women through perinatal mental health and motherhood in general. There's a huge network of people who want and need to interact and share.
Engage with the people around you, create community and don’t be afraid to take that jump into being real and caring for one another.

Quotables:

“It’s predisposed, we think we have to be doing all this stuff and we’re the last on the list. We are not good at making sure that we’re taking care of ourselves. You’re no good to anybody if you have run yourself into the wall.” - Stacey Porter

“You don’t have an option. When you have little kids who are that young, they still need their basic needs met. Period. That is actually what I attribute to being able to start going through a little bit more than just the motions.” - Stacey Porter

“When people go through traumatic experiences, society tends to not want to talk about anything.” - Stacey Porter

“I couldn’t accept that she [Delilah] was just going to be here and gone. I wanted to make sure that people knew she had existed.” - Stacey Porter

“The hardest part, for families who are suffering losses, finding a way to continue living and to continue your life, whatever the journey is after that, after getting through that initial grief. It’s not a start and stop.” - Stacey Porter

“We can’t always fix it and what we do is we focus so much on trying to fix and trying to find ways to fix it that we end up invalidating the experience altogether.” - Stacey Porter

“We need to be able to support women by letting them have their truth and being with them expressing that.” - Stacey Porter

Links from Show:

The Preeclampsia Foundation

National Perinatal Association

Preemie Parent Alliance

National Coalition for Maternal Mental Health

2020 Mom

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Real Plans

This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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MORE FROM STACEY

The Tangerine Owl Project

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Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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Mom...In The Works

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This week we are deconstructing our episode from last week with Arianna Taboada. If you haven't listened to that episode, go back and listen to Episode 30. As a refresher, Arianna is Maternal Health expert who runs a consulting firm that helps entrepreneurs design a maternity leave plan that fit their business model and personal needs. This week we talk about our highs and lows this week, outsourcing, the mental load of motherhood, and maternity leave as we know it.

Listen as Kate & Liz discuss:

Liz’s high - kids cooperating without huge resistance, even while accomplishing a lot.
Kate’s high/low - kid landing in poop, because ...natural consequences.
Learning how to outsource, what you can do and what is available to you.
How little time you truly have when you’re home with littles.
Keeping childcare/daycare even while on leave.
Inviting or encouraging people to help and or visit and provide sanity saving help.
After the first kid, help isn’t as obvious, you may just have to ask for it.
Maternity Leave, how varied it can be - know your rights and advocate for yourself.
What are we prioritizing if we don’t allow moms and families to bond and recover?
Cultural change is exciting, but we don’t yet know the results of our societal shifts.
You may need an expert to help you through the FMLA regulations in your state.

Links from Show:

Episode 24: Kathy Stowell, Mom of 2 in the “golden age” of parenthood

Natural Consequences

Arianna’s Post-Partum Eco Map

Kate’s Post-Partum Support Workbook

Family Medical Leave Act

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Crate Joy

This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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MORE FROM ARIANNA

Arianna’s Website

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Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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Mom...In The Works

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This week we chat with Arianna Taboada, a maternal health expert, about her motherhood journey. Listen as she shares her expertise in the field, how she manages to get it all done (hint...outsourcing), and how she is the full time working parent in her relationship. Arianna Taboada is a Maternal Health expert who helps entrepreneurs design a maternity leave plan that fit their business model and personal needs. She has worked for health systems, research institutions and in private practice on a range of women's health issues since 2002. Arianna earned her Masters of Social Work and Masters of Science in Maternal-Child Health from the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill.

Listen as Arianna shares how she:

Was the primary breadwinner the first year of postpartum, a change in the original “plan”.
And her family unexpectedly moved countries during the first year of being a mom.
Adapted her self-care routine to what fits in her life now.
Stopped reading all the books during her pregnancy, and just trusted what she already knew.
Teaches to look to evidence AND reaching out to your community to make milestone parenting decisions.
Is challenged by the “mental load”/“invisible load” mothers carry.
Guides entrepreneurial women through their maternity leave.
Created her Postpartum Eco-Mapto prepare for your postpartum period
Appreciates the time her husband has been able to be the primary, stay at home parent.

Quotables:

“I tend to lean toward not reading or searching for information. First, I assess what I already know and my gut feeling.” - Arianna Taboada

“If you make a decision on how to handle something and that doesn’t work out, it’s not a permanent decision. You can make another decision. Very few choices are finite.” - Arianna Taboada

“You are really vulnerable in this time when there is no economic safety net, a business safety net, and you are dealing with all the physiological, emotional, and physical changes that all mothers are going through.” - Arianna Taboada

“To be honest, this has been the most challenging part of our marriage. He [my husband] was home, I was working a lot, we moved countries, and we were in our first year of parenthood.” - Arianna Taboada

Links from Show:

Study by The Sage Group: 57% of startups are women looking for better work life balance.

Sign up to get Arianna’s Postpartum Eco-Map

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Real Plans

This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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MORE FROM ARIANNA

Arianna’s Website

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Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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Mom...In The Works

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This week we are deconstructing our episode from last week with Heather Vickery of Vickery & Coand the Podcast, theBrave Files. If you haven't listened to that interview, go back and listen to Episode 28. Listen as we give our highs and lows, realizing we only have 10 summers before college with our kids, and how we spend quality time with our kids individually.

Listen as Kate & Liz discuss:

Our highs & lows of our lives right now (battling daylight savings and lying, sneaky kids).
The 18 summers project.
How we plan on making the holidays more memorable.
We are approaching prime memory age with our kids.
How we are making time to spend individual time with each of our kids.
The importance of reconnecting with each of our kids.

Links from Show:

Episode 28: Heather Vickery

Reframing ‘Mommy Brain’: New York Times

We only have 18 summers together with our kids: Motherly

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Crate Joy

This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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MORE FROM HEATHER

Vickery & Co

The Brave Files Podcast

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Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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Mom...In The Works

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This week Heather Vickery of Vickery & Coand the Podcast, theBrave Filesshares how she is a mother of four who cherishes the time she has left before they leave the nest, how navigating a difficult time allowed her to be open to asking and accepting help, and how she chooses to live her truth each and every day. Heather Vickery is an award-winning entrepreneur, business owner, and transformational life and business coach. Heather’s world turned upside down after a major life transformation and divorce, suddenly, she had the freedom to be her most authentic self. She discovered that this same authenticity empowered her with the confidence she needed to repair, rebuild, and reach her life’s vision and goals.

Listen as Heather shares how she:

Came out after being married and having four children.
Learned to ask for and accept help during her time of need.
Navigates mothering her children through her divorce.
Relinquishes control and let’s her children make choices.
Uses bedtime as a time to reconnect individually with each of her children.
Institutes boundaries to preserve herself and priorities.
Eliminated the word “should” and “need” from her vocabulary and focuses on the want.
Gives herself grace and forgiveness.

Quotables:

“Go find what makes you happy. Be your authentic self. The people and world around you are better when you are good.” - Heather Vickery

“This thing that sucks right now is super temporary, even though it doesn’t feel that way.” - Heather Vickery

“There’s a wonderful gift in allowing someone else to give graciously.” - Heather Vickery

“The Breakdown Structure: Something goes wrong, own up to it, forgive yourself, then do something different.” - Heather Vickery

Links from Show:

Vickery & Co

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Real Plans

This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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MORE FROM HEATHER

Vickery & Co

The Brave Files Podcast

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Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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Mom...In The Works

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This week we are deconstructing our conversation with Shelley Suh from last week. If you haven't listened to that episode go back and download Episode 26. Shelley is a small business owner of a successful nursing and maternity clothing line, Loyal Hana. Parenting and entrepreneurship haven't always been smooth sailing, but she shared how she stays true to herself and keeps her priorities in check.

Listen as Kate & Liz discuss:

How creativity can help you focus and climb out of dark periods.
What creative outlets we use for coping and surviving.
Surrendering to parenthood and all it’s unexpected twists and turns.
Caring for your parents as you are caring for your own children.
Emotional decisions when it comes to caring for an ailing parent.

Links from Show:

Episode 26: Shelley Suh

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Real Plans

This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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MORE FROM SHELLEY:

Loyal Hana Website

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Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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Mom...In The Works

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This week we are sharing Shelley Suh of Loyal Hana’s story. Shelley Suh founded Loyal Hana, a maternity & nursing wear clothing line, after having worked in the fashion industry for over 20 years. More than just a collection of maternity and nursing garments, Loyal Hana is a reliable friend during a crucial time when the pressure is on to provide it all, a helping hand when circumstances make it difficult to be discreet, a universal “thank you” and a way for new moms to feel confident and beautiful every day. Shelley strives to preserve her priorities to stay present and mindful while raising two children in the Hamptons.

Listen as Shelley shares how she:

Stays present while she juggles her kids and her business.
Reminds herself to have gratitude for now.
Is raising her children while caretaking her parents.
Lost control over both her physical & mental self during her postpartum periods.
Used creativity to regain her sense of self in a period where she felt lost.
Struggled with postpartum depression after the birth of her son.
Can step away from her kids, which makes her a better mom.
Declares what she wants in her life.

Quotables:

“You want to fill their lives with beautiful content, rather than beautiful things.” - Shelley Suh

“When I get upset, I ask myself, what was that really about?” - Shelley Suh

“When I first had my daughter, it was the first time I felt out of control. It was really challenging for me.” - Shelley Suh

“If you try to control something you can’t control, it just gets worse. I learned from that I really had to surrender.” - Shelley Suh

“My mantra is: don’t worry, we’ll figure it out.” - Shelley Suh

“If you feel alien to who you are after you have a child, there’s nothing wrong with you….it will move through you and you will be able to get back to who you are.” - Shelley Suh

Links from Show:

Loyal Hana

Pump Spotting

Postpartum Depression Organization

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Crate Joy

This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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MORE FROM SHELLEY

Loyal Hana

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Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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Mom...In The Works

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This week we are deconstructing our episode from last week with Kathy Stowell. If you haven't listened to that episode, go back and listen to Episode 24. As a refresher, Kathy is a mom of two in the self-proclaimed "golden years of parenting", looking to add some more fun in her life. This week we talk about putting the “fun” back in our lives, parenting children that are wildly different than ourselves, and the importance of finding your community.

Listen as Kate & Liz discuss:

Where they find unexpected snippets of fun as moms of little kids.
Results of our Briggs-Meyer Personality Tests.
How our personality results shine some light on our own limitations that may explain what frustrates us as parents.
Compatibility of astrological signs in our families.
Tips we use to get our kids to cooperate.
Strategies we pick up from other parents in our support network.
How isolation increases our guilt over “bad” parenting moments.
The importance of interacting & being around other parents.

Links from Show:

Episode 24: Kathy Stowell, Mom of 2 in the “golden age” of parenthood

Greatest Showman Soundtrack

Bad Moms Soundtrack

Briggs-Meyer Personality Test

Yardsticks - Children in the Classroom 4 to 14 Book

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Real Plans

This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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MORE FROM KATHY

Bliss Beyond Naptime

Find out more about Kathy’s Mama Bliss Coaching

Get Kathy’s Free Guide to Claiming some more Mama Time.

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Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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Mom...In The Works

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This week we are chatting with Kathy Stowell of Bliss Beyond Naptime. Kathy lives in the sleepy mountain town of Nelson, British Columbia where she's a triple latte-fueled mom to two kids, a 13 year old girl and a nine year old boy, wife to a rock-climbing obsessed engineer and the special person to their blonde wiener dog named Angel. Kathy has been writing about creativity, self-care and simplicity over at Bliss Beyond Naptime since 2006 and is the founder of Mama Bliss Coaching School.

Listen as Kathy shares how she:

Is at the golden age of parenting (she thinks).
Honors who her children are emerging to be and their moods.
Waldorf schooling has shaped her parenting.
Adding FUN back into her life as her kids are getting older.
Dares herself to do something fun or scary each day.
Takes time for herself, gives her partner and children the same.
Releases guilt putting her needs first.
Recently had a family pet pass away and navigating that with her children.
Keeps things SIMPLE (hint, she has an acronym).
Journaling can help keep the anxiety and overwhelm to a minimum.

Quotables:

“Getting to know [my children] is a delicious little secret.” - Kathy Stowell

“I was so fun back in the day.” - Kathy Stowell

“Having all these coping tools in our belt, we need to show them [our children] how to use them, because life is going to just be one thing after another.” - Kathy Stowell

“S.A.F.E. - my acronym to keep things simple; S - school, A - activities, F - flow (routine), E - electronics.” - Kathy Stowell

“You want to do it all, but you can’t. And, that can be frustrating.” - Kathy Stowell

Links from Show:

Meyers- Briggs Test

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Real Plans

This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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All our sponsor offers are available on our website. To get all the discounts and perks go to www.momdeconstructed.com/sponsors

MORE FROM KATHY

Bliss Beyond Naptime

Find out more about Kathy’s Mama Bliss Coaching

Get Kathy’s Free Guide to Claiming some more Mama Time.

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Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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Mom...In The Works

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Today we are deconstructing our conversation with Valerie Friedlander, who is raising two boys and a business. She is a certified life coach specializing in helping entrepreneurial Moms break though their self-defeating patterns and take confident action towards their goals. If you want to listen to the full episode, be sure to download Episode 22of the Mom Deconstructed Podcast. This week we break down relationship struggles across the board: with partners, friends, community, and ourselves.

Listen as Kate & Liz discuss:

Being in survival mode in their partnerships.
Touch buckets: is there truth to it being “out touched”?
What date nights look like these days with three kids.
Where we find our community.
Awkwardness when we are in new situations and forming new relationships.
How to let go of what others may think or say about you as a mother.

Links from Show:

Episode 22: Valerie Friedlander, Mom of two learning to get “unstuck”

The Five Love Languages: by Gary Chapman

Mating in Captivityby Esther Perel

Questions to Ask your Partner for At-Home Date Night(Psychology Today)

Episode 17: Making Mom Friends, Bridging the Gap between Polite Greetings to actual Conversation

Blog Post: Why do Other Peoples Careless Comments Cause us so much Stress?

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This week we are chatting with Valerie Friedlander of Unlimited Mom. Valerie is a mom of two young boys, and certified life coach specializing in helping entrepreneurial Moms break though their self-defeating patterns and take confident action towards their goals.

Listen as Valerie shares how:

She differentiates phases vs. being “stuck”
Labeling things as “bad” is a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Arguments are important.
Where she finds community as both an entrepreneur and mom.
Motherhood impacted her relationship with her husband.
Intimacy was drastically affected when she became a mom and steps she’s taking to restoring it.
She chooses how to show up for herself, kids, and relationship.

Quotables:

“Sometimes we focus too much on the end point. When I’m focused on too many end points, I’m not present anymore.” - Valerie Friedlander

“I thought I put my life together so I would be happy, and I’m wasn’t happy.” - Valerie Friedlander

“We didn’t know how to navigate parent life AND marriage life.” - Valerie Friedlander

“There are two things you aren’t trained in in life, how to be a parent and how to be in a relationship” - Valerie Friedlander

“Don’t beat yourself up if you’ve had a day that you were in survival mode.” - Valerie Friedlander

Links from Show:

Follow Valerie on Facebook for her Monday Facebook Lives.

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Crate Joy

This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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Today we are deconstructing our last episode with Suzanne Brown. Suzanne is a strategic marketing and business consultant who gradually reformatted her work life to fit her new and challenging mom life. If you haven’t listened already, be sure to go back and download Episode 20 and hear Suzanne explain the many (MANY) steps she’s taken to find balance and reclaim HERSELF first.

Listen as Kate & Liz discuss:

Our transitions to part-time work once we became mom
Numerous iterations of part-time working schedule
What work-life balance looks like for us (hint: it’s constantly changing)
Managing all the schedules and households
The importance of finding ourselves.
Why isn’t parenthood valued as highly as a paid profession??!
How we are incorporating giving kids space as the school year is starting.

Links from Show:

Episode 20: Suzanne Brown, Author & Mom of two, empowering women find the elusive work-life “balance”

Mom Deconstructed: Episode 14: Figuring out who you are once you have time to breathe.

Mom Deconstructed: Episode 13: Battling Summertime Boredom with Kids.

Scarcity Mindset: How the Scarcity Mindset can Make Problems Worse: NPR

Mompowerment: Insights from Successful Professional Part-time Working Moms Who Balance Career and Family by Suzanne Brown

The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal: How to Reclaim, Rejuvenate and Re-Balance Your Life Paperback – by Renée Peterson Trudeau

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Crate Joy

This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

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Mompowerment Website

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To kick off our second season, we are chatting with Suzanne Brown, a mom of 2 young boys, this week. Suzanne is a strategic marketing and business consultant, speaker (including a TEDx talk), avid international traveler, work-life balance expert and advocate, and author. Her books include: Mompowerment: Insights from Successful Professional Part-time Working Moms Who Balance Career and Family and The Mompowerment Guide to Work-life Balance. She empowers moms to think differently about their career approach and provides guidance on work-life balance through her own experience and research as well as stories, insights, and advice from more than 110 interviews with professional part-time working moms.

Listen as Suzanne shares how:

Her day is structured to allow for “me” time.
She negotiated and moved to part-time in the corporate world after having her son prematurely.
She maintains her boundaries and priorities to keep her work and life balanced.
She worked towards finding who SHE was again after becoming a mom.
She maintained who she was after she had her second child.
Traveling has always been a part of her family life.
Engaging with other moms energizes her.
She gives her children space after school.

Quotables:

“If I’m trying to do a checkbox every day, I would fail. But, if I look week or month, I’m doing great.” - Suzanne Brown

“Motherhood in general was kind of a shock to my system.” - Suzanne Brown

“We honestly thought we could just nicely tuck this child into this very active lifestyle.” - Suzanne Brown

“I literally woke up after a year of being a mom, looked in the mirror and thought “Where did I go?” - Suzanne Brown

“It’s really hard when your child is your greatest source of frustration.” - Suzanne Brown

“I feel like if someone said ‘it’s ok for everything not to be unicorns and rainbows all the time, that doesn’t make you a bad mom. It just means you are a human being and have to try something different.’” - Suzanne Brown

Links from Show:

Mompowerment: Insights from Successful Professional Part-time Working Moms Who Balance Career and Family by Suzanne Brown

Bad Moms Soundtrack

Hardcore 24by Janet Evanovich

The Mother's Guide to Self-Renewal: How to Reclaim, Rejuvenate and Re-Balance Your Life Paperback– by Renée Peterson Trudeau

EPISODE SPONSORS:

Crate Joy

This podcast is made possible by listeners, like you. We believe that community is key to motherhood, we invite you to consider joining our Patreon community and supporting us with a monthly donation on our page: www.patreon.com/momdeconstructed.

If you would like to become one of our sponsors visit: www.momdeconstructed.com/advertisingand start the conversation!

All our sponsor offers are available on our website. To get all the discounts and perks go to www.momdeconstructed.com/sponsors

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Mompowerment Website

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Kate & Liz open up about asking for help when they need it most. We talk about how hard it is TO ask for help, but also the benefit of opening ourselves up to the possibility of getting help.

Listen as we share how we have learned to be both on the receiving end and giving end of help.

Start asking for help from your partner & closest and intimate friends and family.Remember that boundaries on your time and energy are a good thing. Identify the difference between “need” and “want”.If you are on the receiving end of help, don’t let the guilt consume you. Soon enough, you will be the giver.Take it just ONE step at a time. This life stage doesn’t define you.

Links mentioned in the episode:

Honest Discussion: How to keep an even keel. Struggling with Anxiety - Blog Post

Mindset Link

Sarah Argenal’s tips for setting boundaries - Episode 03

Five Languages of Love: Gary Chapman

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Kate & Liz talk about heading back to school after summer. We discuss the change back into full time school routine and how we are gearing OURSELVES up for it.

Listen as we share how we’ve managed heading back to school in the past, and what we are doing to prepare.

Keep it simple, don’t add things to your routine other than school starting.
Schedule it (even if it’s only in your mind!).
The great homework debacle - to do it right after school or after some playtime?
Routines: do they help?
Giving space for tired children at the end of each day for a couple weeks.
Getting the kids involved in the the chores.

Links mentioned in the episode:

Liza Tremblay’s and her calendars - Episode 09

Battling Summertime Boredom - Episode 13

Carrie Sharpe and motivating her children to help with chores - Episode 07

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Kate & Liz talk mom friends this week. How do you find them? How do you make them? Do you even need them? This episode we share our vulnerabilities (and awkward pick up lines reserved for the playground) and insecurities when it comes to making the quintessential “mom friend.”

Listen as we share what has worked for us in connecting with other moms.

Mom friends are ACTUALLY important.
Put yourself out there, we are ALL in the same situation navigating this.
If you’re friends on social media - reach out IRL!
Go outside your comfort zone and attend a class, lecture, or event to be around other moms with children your age.
Make a list of topics (other than kids!) you are interested in to open up conversations at the latest class birthday party.
Make time for nurturing your friendships with other moms.

Links mentioned in the episode:

Matrescence: New York Times: Alexandra Sacks

Liza Tremblay: Put your Mascara on and drink a Redbull - Episode 09

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Kate & Liz slow things down this week and discuss how they keep family time in the forefront in this world of “busy is better”. It can be so hard to instill the value of family time when we are pulled in many directions, but we are trying to do it as much as we can.

Listen as we share how we are incorporating more family time in our busy lives.

Setting limits on what we commit to do both as families and individuals.
Build in the downtime.
How too many activities quickly catch up to us.
Make home time count, break out the games!
Vacations and Staycations are a great time to ditch the routines and just BE as a family.

Links mentioned in the episode:

Episode 13: Battling Boredom

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Kate & Liz discuss a BIG topic this week, one that we are still actively navigating with our young children: How do you raise socially aware children in this crazy, opinionated world of ours? We discuss how we are trying to expose our children to diversity and adversity, and teaching them to embrace and celebrate it.

Listen as we share how we are hoping to raise kids that are socially aware:

Talk about differences with your kids, at whatever level they are at
Teaching our children to reach out and engage with others that are “different”
Why we feel uncomfortable when our kids point out the differences
How we encourage our kids to explain to us why people are different
Teaching our children that everyone has a story, and to celebrate that
Practice what we preach

Links mentioned in the episode:

Longest Shortest Time: How not to raise a racist.

Wonder by R. J. Palacio

Episode 05 with Sasha Gray

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Kate & Liz discuss some struggles, triumphs, and insight into the burning question mom-question “Who am I?”. We discuss what it means to “find your identity” as as mom, how to find time for you when you are caring for others, and the importance of making space for you.

Listen as we share insight in how we’ve navigated finding (more of) our identity once we became moms.

Embrace the Matrescence period
How your priorities and goals change in motherhood
Finding pockets of time to find alone “non-mom” time
Regain and build your identity slowly
Motherhood as an unfolding

Links mentioned in the episode:

Matrescence: New York Times: Alexandra Sacks

Like a Mother: A Feminist Journey Through the Science and Culture of Pregnancyby Angela Garbes

EP 13: How to Survive Summertime Boredom with Kids

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Listen as we share some tactics on how we battle summertime boredom:

Create a summer bucket list.
Start a Bored Jar
Boredom is a GOOD thingfor kids.
Quiet time is encouraged in our houses.
Giving ourselves permission to not be engaged ALL the time.
How we balance “all the things” (hint: we don’t!)

Links mentioned in the episode:

Psychologists recommend children be bored in the summer: Quartz.

Boredom Fosters Resilience in Children: Psychology Today.

The Dangers of Distracted Parenting: The Atlantic

Bowling Aloneby Robert Putnam

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Kate Turza is a mom of 3 beautiful, loud (in all ways), and loving children, wife of one supportive husband, animal mama to two cats and one giant dog. She lives on the East End of Long Island near her families. She works part-time as an office manager and side-hustle as a postpartum doulaand podcast co-host. In her"free" time, you can usually find her outside on a bike ride or jog with at least one of her kiddos.

Listen as Kate shares how she:

Is seeing the “light” in her parenting journey.
Struggles with meeting the needs of “all the things”
Is constantly battling with mom guilt
Hopes sharing stories on this podcast will help moms realize they aren’t alone
Compares herself to other moms, despite knowing she shouldn’t.
Lowered her expectations for her sanity.

Quotables:

“Taking care of yourself doesn’t just happen, it’s a work in progress.” - Kate Turza

“What is up with mom guilt?” - Kate Turza

“My initial thought is usually ‘I’m failing’.” - Kate Turza

“I felt really alone for a long time.” - Kate Turza

“I wish parents were more up front about feeling out of control.” - Kate Turza

“You want to know the truth, I run them ragged.” - Kate Turza

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Liz Sanicola of Mom in the Worksand the Mom Deconstructed Podcastis a wife, mom to three (plus 8 chickens, a dog, and a cat), writer, tech junkie, homesteader, budding permaculturist (is that a thing?!) and craver of simplicity. She and her husband are often asked how they “do it all”, but the reality is… they DON’T! She’s doing her best to keep life simple amidst the chaos of modern life. In the age of technology and the never ending list of "all the things", it seems that people have never been so far apart. Her goal is to help bring some clarity and sanity to our lives and help relate the lessons we have learned so that others might find their own path to a healthier, more fulfilled life.

Listen as Liz shares how she:

Separates what she needs to do vs. what she wants to do.
Struggles how to be “all the things.”
Always feels like there is a stone somewhere unturned.
Writing down daily and long term goals has helped her.
Her and her husband’s relationship is different than the norm.
Keeps the health and wellness of her family a priority.
Strives to keep her life simple.

Quotables:

“My whole life I had an abundance of patience, where did it go when I became a mom?” - Liz Sanicola

“Women’s personal expectations are to be a domestic goddess.” - Liz Sanicola

“I always feel like there is a stone unturned somewhere.” - Liz Sanicola

“What’s the point if we are just driving ourselves crazy all the time?” - Liz Sanicola

“It’s so insane to me that people will say anything on Facebook, but will NOT say anything to me at school pick up.” - Liz Sanicola

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This week we are deconstructing the myth that becoming parents is an easy decision. We are revisiting our conversation from last week with Liza Tremblay. If you missed it, go back and download episode 9. As a refresher, Liza is a mom of two, a restaurateur and food entrepreneur. While building their businesses, they struggled with infertility, but since have built a family and business life unique to them.

Liz and Kate discuss:

How to keep ALL the calendars straight.
Importance of going out with your partner & friends, even as an introvert.
Breaking the routine can work for both you (and your kids!).
How to support friends & family who are battling with infertility.
Pregnancy is such an internal struggle.
We ARE in the right place at the right time (at least, how we are TRYING to be present in the moment).
Age appropriate chores and how everyone can contribute to the household.

Resolve.org - How to support friends and family

Huffington Post - What not to say to someone trying to conceive.

New York Times: Age Appropriate Chores

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Follow Joe & Liza’s Ice Cream on Instagram.

Follow Bayburger on Instagram.

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Quotables:

“We have a standing Friday night date night, sometimes we just go in the backyard.” - Liz Sanicola

“You trap yourself into what you perceive as the easiest route to success.” - Liz Sanicola

“Sometimes you can’t always “fix” things, you just need to listen.” - Kate Turza

“We have an intrinsic desire to relate to one another, but why are we comparing?” - Liz Sanicola

“When you are IN the moment, that’s where the magic happens.” - Liz Sanicola

“When my brain isn’t actively engaged, I always start thinking about what needs to happen next.” - Kate Turza

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Liza Tremblay is the mother of Leo and Rosie and the owner of Bay Burger restaurant and Joe & Liza's Ice Cream, based in Sag Harbor, New York. Her and her husband, Joe, have owned and operated Bayburger and Joe and Liza’s Ice Cream for the last 11 years. When Liza isn’t working full-time or mothering her two children, you can find her going out to her weekly date with her husband or out to dinner with her friends.

Listen as Liza shares how:

Even though she’s been a mom for seven years she’s still in the thick of it.
She manages being a full-time business owner AND a mom.
Important scheduling weekly date nights and girls nights are.
She navigated a three year journey to get pregnant the first time, and two year journey the second.
How she got off and took a breath from the infertility train.
Her advice for moms who are trying to get pregnant.
Her family rose to the occasion after her recent surgery.

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Mom...In The Works

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Quotables:

“I never feel like I’m in the right place at the right time.” - Liza Tremblay

“Maybe you’re a little sleepy and hungover the next day, but it’s worth it.” - Liza Tremblay

“Drink a Redbull, put some mascara on and let’s do this.” - Liza Tremblay

“Like lightning in a bottle, they don’t know what’s going to work.” - Liza Tremblay

“Once you’re on the infertility train no one asks if you want to stop or talk about it.” - Liza Tremblay

“I knew I wanted to be a mom and I knew we were going to figure it out.” - Liza Tremblay

“Life with mommy out of commission managed to continue.” - Liza Tremblay

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This week we are deconstructing our conversation from last week with Carrie Sharpe. Here’s that episode. Carrie is a mom of 5, who is navigating “older” children as her first child prepares to leave the nest. Liz and Kate discuss:

Bonuses of having older children.
How children can contribute to the household, using incentives!
Carrie’s tips for keeping her relationship with her husband strong.
Where you can find time for your relationship when you have young kids.
Letting go of the guilt to go on date night.
How partnership is work.

Here’s more more about Carrie’s son (Maverick’s) birth & harrowing NICU journey.

Quotables:

“We all get stuck in a rut, we need to remember to re-evaluate.” - Kate

“It is in those times of crisis that brings challenges and strengths to the forefront.” - Liz

“It’s always a work in progress.” - Liz

“Marriage is portrayed as blissful all the time, and it’s NOT. There are really hard times you need to work through.” - Kate

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Carrie Sharpe is a Communication Consultant and Speaker and co-owner of He says, She says. A highly sought-after international speaker, Carrie develops courses and coaches clients on public speaking skills, interview skills, and other communication topics. She earned her degree in Political Science and Psychology from Lake Superior State University. Carrie is a Huffington Post Contributor and has been quoted in a variety of publications including LiveStrong, Business Insider, and Bustle. She resides in northern Michigan with her husband, Ryan, and their five children.

Listen as Carrie shares how her mothering journey has evolved as her children have gotten older:

She’s preparing for her oldest to leave the nest.
Days truly do go slow, but years fly by.
She stays present and creates memories with her family.
To keep your relationship strong after having children.
Everyone contributes to completing household chores.
She homeschooled all her children.
To say “No” without guilt

Quotables:

“Just because it works today, doesn’t mean you won’t be tweaking it tomorrow.” - Carrie Sharpe

“There are years of my life I don’t even remember.” - Carrie Sharpe

“When you’re in a crisis, you see the best and worst of each other. Any issues in the relationship are magnified during and after the event.” - Carrie Sharpe

“The older I get, the more inclined I am to say no to obligatory things.”- Carrie Sharpe

“Is this a necessity right now? Is this my priority or someone else’s?” - Carrie Sharpe

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MORE FROM KATE:

Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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MORE FROM LIZ:

Mom...In The Works

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This week we are deconstructing our conversation from last week with Sasha Gray. Here’s that episode. Sasha is an older and wiser version of her first time mothering self, as she’s mothering the second time around.

Liz and Kate discuss:

the ups and downs of the myth that “Practice makes perfect”
How not to view your shortcomings as “failures.”
Having to remind ourselves we are enough.
What’s best for everyone is relative.
How to create productive members of society (PMOS).
Life experiences and how they shape us.
When we ACTUALLY have time to stop, think, and analyze.

MORE FROM SASHA:

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Follow Sasha on YouTube.

Follow Sasha on Pinterest.

Sasha’s Mini Group Sessions ~ 30 minute classes that give solutions and guidance that you can take action on immediately.

Sasha’s Glitter & Grace Club ~ a membership site that offers daily motivation and inspiration, along with a monthly zoom call and a birthday gift in the mail.

Sasha’s Mindset Switch Coaching

Quotables:

“It wasn’t a failure, it was what I had to do for survival.” - Kate Turza

“You have to treat yourself as you would treat your friends.” - Liz Sanicola

“PMOS Training: Become a Productive Member of Society.” - Sasha Gray

“It won’t look pretty, but it will get done.” - Liz Sanicola

“Life is full of stumbling blocks, you need to focus on things that matter.” - Liz Sanicola

“In 20 minutes I can go from loving it to a raging maniac.” - Liz Sanicola

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MORE FROM KATE:

Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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MORE FROM LIZ:

Mom...In The Works

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Sasha Gray of Scattered Sashais a writer of words, spewer of sarcasm, and a margarita loving, sassy Southern belle raising her 11 year old granddaughter. Sasha believes life is tough for a lot of us, and we’re all just doing the best we can. But she also believes that kindness, laughing, and doing a little dance every now and then is sometimes the answer to everyday life. Sometimes we just need a margarita and some glitter to give us that extra push.

Sasha brings her unique brand of motivational humor to her Facebook home - Scattered Sasha- where her daily lives and weekly show make us laugh, and remind us that we are perfectly imperfect and that's just fine.

Sasha's mottos are: Make a difference. Build people up. Create Laughter. Spread a little love.....

And with a journey fraught with caffeine and chaos, and slapped together by pixie dust and tequila, Sasha knows a thing or two about differences, building people up, creating laughter and spreading a little love.

Listen as Sasha shares how:

She uses her wisdom as an “older” mom to make more intentional choices.
She deals with second guessing her decisions and regret.
Her granddaughter became her daughter.
Social Media has changed her mothering journey.
Her life experience (age?) allows her to set better boundaries and priorities.
To deal with self-criticism (Take that picture!)
Laughter has helped her cope.
To raise a child in an atypical family.
She chooses happiness.

MORE FROM SASHA:

Follow Sasha on Facebook.

Follow Sasha on Instagram.

Follow Sasha on YouTube.

Follow Sasha on Pinterest.

Sasha’s Mini Group Sessions ~ 30 minute classes that give solutions and guidance that you can take action on immediately.

Sasha’s Glitter & Grace Club ~ a membership site that offers daily motivation and inspiration, along with a monthly zoom call and a birthday gift in the mail.

Sasha’s Mindset Switch Coaching

Quotables:

“My journey is fraught with caffeine and chaos, slapped together by pixie dust and tequila” - Sasha Gray

“I have no regrets, just fabulous experiences” - Sasha Gray

“If it causes drama or trauma, just say no” - Sasha Gray

“You have 1000 little boxes in your soul that are filled with all the good things people tell you. If you let 1 box fill with ugly, then it festers and grows, then there is no room for the good boxes of kindness and joy.” - Sasha Gray

“Fill your head and soul with positive” - Sasha Gray

“Can’t change how people act, but how we react” - Sasha Gray

“What is in my realm of possibility?” - Sasha Gray

“PMOS Training: How to make your child a Productive Member Of Society” - Sasha Gray

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MORE FROM KATE:

Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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MORE FROM LIZ:

Mom...In The Works

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This week we are deconstructing our conversation from last week with Sarah Argenal. Here’s that episode. Sarah works in the fast-paced litigation field but set plans in motion when she began her family to transition into a work from home mom.

Liz and Kate discuss:

the ups and downs of the myth that “it all goes to plan”
Where motherhood fits into our identities.
Embracing shifting priorities.
How routines help us get through the daily parenting tasks.
Where to find time for ourselves & partners.
What our self care looks like.
Study that women do more housework than their partners.

Clarification & Updates: Sarah worked as a Litigation Support Analyst (not as a lawyer), we misspoke in the episode! As a recent update, she still continues to work in this field from home after the birth of her second child.

MORE FROM SARAH:

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Leave a review on ITunes here.

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MORE FROM KATE:

Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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MORE FROM LIZ:

Mom...In The Works

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Quotables:

“It was a hard decision to stick with it.” - Kate Turza

“It’s so easy to lost track of priorities when you’re in the moment.” - Liz Sanicola

“It could be as simple as making eye contact and saying “I love you.” - Liz Sanicola

“Self care...think small.” - Kate Turza

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This week on the Mom Deconstructed Podcast we are talking with Sarah Argenal.

Sarah Argenal is the Founder of the Working Parent Resource and Host of the Working Parent Resource Podcast. She facilitates candid conversations, offers reliable resources and provides practical training to help professional moms and dads integrate all aspects of their lives without sacrificing one area over another. Sarah has her Master's degree in Marriage and Family Therapy and Adult Development and is a Certified Professional Coach with nearly 20 years of experience in counseling, coaching, college-level instruction, course development, and project management. You can find out more about Sarah and everything she offers atwww.WorkingParentResource.com, where you can find Sarah’s free online training for professional moms and dads to help them address the real reasons why they don't have enough time and suffer in survival mode. ""What's Behind Your Burnout: The 3 Biggest Burnout Triggers and How to Overcome Them".

Sarah shares her decision to leave her fast-paced career in litigation once she had a family and how she managed to find her sense of balance.

Clarification & Updates: Sarah worked as a Litigation Support Analyst (not as a lawyer), we misspoke in the episode! As a recent update, she still continues to work in this field from home after the birth of her second child.

Listen as Sarah shares how:

She made the decision to leave her career in litigation to be a work at home mom.
She balances working and being a mom.
She felt she “wasn’t good at being a mom.”
The parenting “experts” don’t know your family situation.
There is no “right” way to parent.
She manages unpredictability of children with her Type A personality
To maintain yourself after you have a baby.
To keep top of mind what you priorities are RIGHT NOW.
She institutes boundaries to preserve herself.

MORE FROM SARAH:

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MORE FROM KATE:

Kate Turza, Postpartum Doula

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MORE FROM LIZ:

Simply Virtual

Mom...In The Works

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Quotables:

“I felt wasn’t very good at being a mom” - Sarah Argenal

“You need to learn to recalibrate moment to moment.” - Sarah Argenal

“You hear “you can’t have it all”, I didn’t like that.” - Sarah Argenal

“It’s not that I don’t have time, it’s that I don’t want to do it.” - Sarah Argenal

“I’ve got all these things I have to fit into my life, I need to choose what’s important RIGHT NOW.” - Sarah Argenal

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This week we are deconstructing our conversation from last week with Sara Topping. Here’s that episode. Sara is a mostly stay at home mom of 3 young boys on the East End of Long Island.

Liz and Kate discuss:

the ups and downs of the myth that the “Stay at Home Mom” as the ideal.
How we take it breath by breath
How storytelling plays a role in our lives (check out something scientific)
Reasons why we started this podcast

Link:

Blog Post: What we fear most about our parenting journey

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Please leave us a review or rating (or both!) on iTunes!

Quotables:

“The good breaths get better and last longer.” - Kate Turza

“As a parent, all you can do is your best.” - Liz Sanicola

“We are the hardest on ourselves.” - Kate Turza

“Storytelling makes us relatable.” - Liz Sanicola

“Despite being surrounded by people, motherhood is extremely isolating.” - Kate Turza

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Sara Topping is a mom who lives with her husband, three sons, five chickens and dog on the East End of Long Island, NY and keeps a mostly disordered household. She is a co-founder of a local non-profit organization called the East End Birth Network and works part time as a massage therapist which is her licensed profession. She likes to think progressively and makes her own motherhood rule book with torn out pages from other fabulous moms and is constantly editing it. She finds calm in crafts and is a closet crochet/quilter/needleworker and fan of the Voice. She is a minimalist traveler at heart and loves spicing up her life by moving furniture around.

Listen as Sara shares how:

Being a first time mom of twins differs from being a second time mom to a single baby.
She felt the decision to stay home was made for her.
She feels confident as a parent (and how fleeting that is).
Our society/culture should be supporting new families.
She balances being the primary disciplinarian and the “fun parent”.
She keeps her mind stimulated when she’s home with her three boys.
Deciding which child needs her attention in that moment makes her feel.

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If you enjoy listening, we'd love your help staying on the air. Support this podcast on Patreon.

Quotables:

“A lot of decisions were made for me.” - Sara Topping

“Take it one breath at a time”- Sara Topping

“I don’t like saying it gets easier, it gets different.” - Sara Topping

“I feel so limited, even just leaving the house.” - Sara Topping

“I’m going to shave my legs because that will make me feel better about myself.” - Sara Topping

“You feel like you’re trudging through quicksand and being pulled in every direction.” - Sara Topping

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