Write Your Last Chapter: Recent Episodes
Dr. Faryal Michaud
If every life is a book, then the last chapter matters. As a palliative care doctor, I want you to live your best life, every single day, whether or not you are faced with a serious illness. I want us to live an intentional life, one that allows us to live our bucket list and enjoy every minute as tomorrow is never guaranteed. In this podcast I want to share my skills and stories to help us focus on what matters the most and learn to be empowered to live a life on purpose. Join me to be inspired by simple joys of daily living as well as learn how to ask the right questions when faced with difficult decisions in life.
The Power of Healing Together: Reflections on Facilitating The Queen’s Inaugural Retreat for Stage IV Breast Cancer Patients and Their Spouses
It is not an exaggeration to say that facilitating a retreat for breast cancer patients and their spouses was one of the most profound and transformative experiences of my life. As we gathered in the serene and peaceful landscape of Lanai, I witnessed the raw strength, vulnerability, and deep connection that forms when individuals unite around a shared experience of facing one of life’s most challenging circumstances. The retreat was not merely a program; it became a safe haven where healing went beyond the physical body and touched the emotional, psychological, and spiritual realms. Through this journey, I came to understand how deeply intertwined the experiences of patients and their spouses are, and how vital it is to support both on their path toward healing. As one of the patients later shared her impression: This was a “cancer-healing moon.”
In this week's podcast, I'd like to share why it matters for us to:
- Slow Down
- Practice Mindfulness
- Care for ourselves
Decide that our present mind matters and do all we can to protect it. A deep gratitude to National Breast Foundation for their generous support of our retreat. To learn more about how you can get help or donate to help others, please visit: https://www.nationalbreastcancer.org/
I have always wanted to do a podcast about infertility. Both from the point of view of those experiencing it as well as those who offer support for people going through it.
Erica Bove, MD, is a double board certified OB-GYN and Reproductive Endocrinologist (REI) physician at the University of Vermont, as well as a certified life coach through The Life Coach School. She is also the founder of Love and Science: Thriving Through Infertility. She has a keen interest in marrying an evidence-based approach with intuitive knowing in the context of a trusting relationship. She empowers professional women to build their families with confidence and self compassion. Her mission is to heal and support the healers and to create a legacy.
To learn more about her feel free to visit her at www.loveandsciencefertility.com
Also, last week to sign up for our retreat.
Hey, do you love incorporating wisdom as how to live your life from a place of acceptance and self compassion? Then, you want to join me, Ami and Gen for a 4 day magical retreat in Oahu, Honolulu.
This October, for the third time, we are gathering to eat well, practice yoga, dive into breath work as well as connect with like minded women physicians to deepen our gratitude and celebrate who we are. Don't miss this intimate gathering. To learn more or simply to sign up go to www.drfaryal.com/retreat2024
A conversation on Grief, Grace and Gratitude. You don't want to miss this conversation with Dr. Kim Harms. After losing her mother and her son to suicide, she dove into deep depression. She shares her story of slow survival and how she made her story of being shattered into a story of reslience and recovery from depth of grief.
Dr. Kimberly Harms has been around the block in life. She has served as a Commissioned Officer in the United States Public Health Service, a dental school professor, a grief counselor, a death doula, a civil mediator, a clinical dentist with her late husband Jim in Farmington MN, a school board Chair, President of an international women’s organization, the first woman President of the Minnesota Dental Association, a National Spokesperson for the American Dental Association (21 years), an award-winning, best selling author and international speaker on the topics of grief, conflict and legacy planning. She has also suffered many personal losses, including the deaths by suicide of her mother and son and the death by broken heart of her husband after their son’s death. Her most important role now is mother to her two surviving children and grandmother to 6 precious grandchildren. The best way to reach her is at my website: drkimberlyharms.com the link to her book is: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CHG23HD5 Don't miss learning more about her. * Hey, do you love incorporating wisdom as how to live your life from a place of acceptance and self compassion? Then, you want to join me, Ami and Gen for a 4 day magical retreat in Oahu, Honolulu.
This October, for the third time, we are gathering to eat well, practice yoga, dive into breath work as well as connect with like minded women physicians to deepen our gratitude and celebrate who we are. Don't miss this intimate gathering. To learn more or simply to sign up go to www.drfaryal.com/retreat2024
Dr. Junaid Niazi is a board certified internist and pediatrician who works as a primary care physician for a large healthcare organization in the upper Midwest. Part of his time is spent as an Information Services Medical Director working on optimizing the EHR for physician use and patient care.
As of October 2023, his primary care group is now the largest private sector union in the country, and he serves on the bargaining committee.
He is married to a pediatrician and has two young children.
In addition to the above roles, Junaid is also a physician life coach and the entrepreneur behind Prosperous Life MD, where he coaches physicians on all things wellness, productivity, business, and careers.
He runs a group coaching program called Charting Conquered where he helps physicians complete their charting at work and has helped over 400 physicians & APPs reclaim their time at home for themselves.
Junaid wants to help more physicians stay in medicine, if they choose, because everyone benefits the more of us stay in medicine. Here's where to learn about his free webinar and more.
- free training reg page: www.leaveyourworkatwork.com - IG profile: https://www.instagram.com/prosperouslifemd
Travel is on everyone's bucket list. No matter whether you are faced with a serious illness or not. So, you can imagine my excitement when I was able to invite my this week's guest on the podcast. Dr. Devon Gimbel has made it her life's work and mission to teach us all the ways that we can use our everyday life expenses and turn them into currencies with which we can travel the world with. Do not miss this week's episode where you learn about how to live an abundant life no matter where you are with your mindset around your finances. And my favorite: Learn what is on Devon's bucket list?
To learn more about all things point related, please check out https://www.pointmetofirstclass.com/podcast
Enjoy this week's conversation. And oh yeah! Want ways to accrue more points for future travel? Join me on my exclusive retreat this year in the beautiful Turtle Bay. Then, you want to join me, Ami and Gen for a 4 day magical retreat in Oahu, Honolulu.
This October, for the third time, we are gathering to eat well, practice yoga, dive into breath work as well as connect with like minded women physicians to deepen our gratitude and celebrate who we are. Don't miss this intimate gathering. To learn more or simply to sign up go to www.drfaryal.com/retreat2024
A mother; A cancer survivor; A pediatrician; A high performance Coach and a fierce advocate for wellness for the medical community: Dr. Erin Hurley is this and so much more. I think you will enjoy my conversation with her about her cancer journey and what made her pivot to be doing what she is doing today.
Learn more about this Transformational Doc at www.happyhealthyhealer.com
Hey, do you love incorporating wisdom as how to live your life from a place of acceptance and self compassion? Then, you want to join me, Ami and Gen for a 4 day magical retreat in Oahu, Honolulu.
This October, for the third time, we are gathering to eat well, practice yoga, dive into breath work as well as connect with like minded women physicians to deepen our gratitude and celebrate who we are. Don't miss this intimate gathering. To learn more or simply to sign up go to www.drfaryal.com/retreat2024
Parenting is hard! If anyone tells you otherwise, they are probably outsourcing most of the hard work. That's my personal experience anyway. That is why I am excited to have our today's guest on the show. Dr. Juli O'Laughlin of "Authentic Parenting" shares her story of what has worked and what has not given her own personal story of traumatic childhood. Join us for this intimate conversation to learn more about what it takes to heal yourself fro inside out- so that you can parent better than you have been parented.
You can learn more about her and her program at www.drjuliparentcoach.com
To learn more about how you can be a part of her coaching program please visit her website to learn more.
And as she is going to be one of our guests in our Hawaii Retreat this year, join us so you can meet her in person and connect in a more meaningful way.
Then, you want to join me, Ami and Gen for a 4 day magical retreat in Oahu, Honolulu.
This October, for the third time, we are gathering to eat well, practice yoga, dive into breath work as well as connect with like minded women physicians to deepen our gratitude and celebrate who we are. Don't miss this intimate gathering. To learn more or simply to sign up go to www.drfaryal.com/retreat2024
Wealth means different things to different people. Of course money always come to mind, but in my own mind, your health should take front and center when it comes to recognizing and prioritizing your true wealth. Join me as I interview Dr. Bonnie Koo, the creater of Wealthy Mom MD facebook group, podcast and coaching program for women physician, as she shares a very spirited and inspiring story. She will share her personal story of near death experience and how she navigated her mind and life around that chapter of her life. I hope you'll enjoy this interview as much as I enjoyed recording it. To learn more about Bonnie, please check out www.wealthymommd.com
As she talks about her retreat, I am curious, are you interested in attending one? If so, then check out her site to sign up for her event next year, or come join me!
Because, do you love incorporating wisdom as how to live your life from a place of acceptance and self compassion? Then, you want to join me, Ami and Gen for a 4 day magical retreat in Oahu, Honolulu.
This October, for the third time, we are gathering to eat well, practice yoga, dive into breath work as well as connect with like minded women physicians to deepen our gratitude and celebrate who we are. Don't miss this intimate gathering. To learn more or simply to sign up go to www.drfaryal.com/retreat2024
First of all, welcome to the NEW podcast! Same amazing content and guests, a new title and art work. "Write Your Best Chapter"
If I am being honest, the theme was always how to write your best chapter. No matter what is happening in our lives, we can always retell our stories so we are not innundated with worry and anxiety. Retell you story, rewrite your chapter and live a completely different life. This brings me to this week's guest: Dr. Hope Seidel. She is a peditatrition and a parent coach. Our conversation is going to inspire you to take all that you have and make the most of the life that Universe gives you. I hope you can enjoy this talk as much as I did. To learn more about her, please check out www.parentwithhope.com
Also, do you want to join us this October to learn how to write your best chapter every day?
Then, you want to join me, Ami and Gen for a 4 day magical retreat in Oahu, Honolulu.
This October, for the third time, we are gathering to eat well, practice yoga, dive into breath work as well as connect with like minded women physicians to deepen our gratitude and celebrate who we are. Don't miss this intimate gathering. To learn more or simply to sign up go to www.drfaryal.com/retreat2024
This week's guest is full of love and light. Dr. Kate Louise Mangona is a Pediatric Radiologist, mother of three girls under 6 and married to an amazing radiation oncologist. In a double interview, we will discuss:
- How to manage your mind around your love when you feel resentful.
- How coaching can teach you how to fall back in love with your relationship or work
Kate and I discuss the importance of taking time for ourselves. How a retreat for yourself or your marriage maybe the pause you need to fall deep into appreciating love and intimacy.
To learn more about Kate's coaching, podcast and amazing retreat in Maui in October called Honeymoon 2.0 please check out her website www.medicinemarriageandmoney.com
Hey, do you love incorporating wisdom as how to live your life from a place of acceptance and self compassion? Then, you want to join me, Ami and Gen for a 4 day magical retreat in Oahu, Honolulu.
This October, for the third time, we are gathering to eat well, practice yoga, dive into breath work as well as connect with like minded women physicians to deepen our gratitude and celebrate who we are. Don't miss this intimate gathering. To learn more or simply to sign up go to www.drfaryal.com/retreat2024
So, I want to tell you that sometimes all you need is a quick little shift. Going from "To do list" to "Get to do list" is all the mindset hack you need to get back on the saddle again. This way of thinking can create a sense of gratitude and self acceptance and opens you up from thinking less about an obligation and more about a privilege.
Before I forget, are you a woman physician? Read on: there is still time for you to join us.
Hey, do you love incorporating wisdom as how to live your life from a place of acceptance and self compassion? Then, you want to join me, Ami and Gen for a 4 day magical retreat in the legendary Turtle Bay Resort Oahu, Honolulu.
This October, for the third time, we are gathering to eat well, practice yoga, dive into breath work as well as connect with like minded women physicians to deepen our gratitude and celebrate who we are. Don't miss this intimate gathering.
October 2-6th. BE THERE!!! To learn more or simply to sign up go to www.drfaryal.com/retreat2024
What is happening in this world?
It seems like every where we turn, there are news of violence and human atrocities that don't seem to end. In our short episode today, I offer you what you CAN do to bring a breath of solice into your life. I hope you enjoy this episode and share it with others.
Mahalo.
Wait, it's been FOUR months since my LAST podcast?
So much has happened, yet, I still want to keep going. This week's message is a big one. You have deal with your pent up emotions, because you can't move on. This episode should help you a little.
Here is why accepting grief is valuable. In thie episode I will share THREE steps to accepting what we resist.
Acceptance is a crucial aspect of dealing with grief because it plays a fundamental role in the healing process. Grief is a natural response to loss, and accepting the reality of that loss is a significant step towards moving forward and finding a way to live with the pain. Here are some reasons why acceptance is important in dealing with grief:
Facilitates emotional processing: Acceptance allows individuals to acknowledge and express their feelings about the loss. This emotional processing is essential for understanding the depth of the grief and working through it.
Paves the way for healing: Acceptance is a bridge between the initial shock and the eventual healing. It is through acceptance that people can begin to adapt to their new reality and start to rebuild their lives.
Reduces emotional resistance: Resisting or denying the reality of the loss can prolong the grieving process and intensify emotional pain. Acceptance helps to reduce this resistance, making it easier to cope with the emotions that accompany grief.
Promotes self-compassion: Accepting the pain of grief allows individuals to be kinder to themselves. It's common for people to feel guilty or blame themselves for their emotions during this time, but acceptance helps them recognize that their feelings are normal and valid.
Encourages seeking support: When individuals accept their grief, they are more likely to reach out for support from friends, family, or professionals. This support can provide comfort and guidance as they navigate the grieving process.
Fosters personal growth: Grief can be a transformative experience. Accepting the loss and the associated emotions can lead to personal growth, increased resilience, and a deeper understanding of oneself.
Improves mental health: Prolonged denial or avoidance of grief can lead to mental health issues such as depression and anxiety. Acceptance is a crucial step in preventing or alleviating these conditions.
Enhances relationships: Acceptance of grief can help individuals communicate their needs and emotions to others effectively. This can strengthen relationships and create a support network that helps in the healing process.
Allows for meaning-making: Acceptance can enable individuals to find meaning and purpose in their grief. It can lead to a search for ways to honor the memory of the lost loved one or contribute to a cause related to the loss.
Promotes long-term well-being: While grief never fully goes away, acceptance allows individuals to integrate the loss into their lives in a way that enables them to move forward with a sense of purpose and hope, ultimately leading to long-term well-being.
When you find yourself thinking "why me?" and experiencing negative thoughts or emotions, it's important to manage your mind and shift your perspective. Here are some strategies that can help:
- Recognize and accept your emotions: It's normal to feel frustrated, upset, or overwhelmed when faced with challenging situations. Allow yourself to acknowledge and accept these emotions without judgment. It's okay to feel what you're feeling.
- Practice self-compassion: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding. Instead of being self-critical, offer yourself words of encouragement and support. Remind yourself that everyone faces difficulties at times, and it's not a reflection of your worth or capabilities.
- Challenge negative thoughts: Question the validity of your "why me?" thoughts. Understand that life is full of ups and downs, and unfortunate events can happen to anyone. Ask yourself if there is any evidence to support the belief that you are singled out for misfortune. Often, you'll find that this belief is based on a biased perception.
- Reframe the situation: Try to reframe the situation in a more positive or realistic light. Look for any potential silver linings, lessons, or growth opportunities that may arise from the experience. Focus on what you can learn and how you can become stronger through the challenges you face.
- Practice gratitude: Cultivating a gratitude mindset can help shift your focus from negativity to positivity. Take a moment to reflect on the things in your life that you are grateful for, even amidst difficult circumstances. This can help you develop a more balanced perspective.
- Seek support: Reach out to trusted friends, family members, or a therapist to talk about your feelings and gain a fresh perspective. Sharing your thoughts and concerns with someone who can offer support can be incredibly helpful.
- Take care of yourself: Engage in activities that promote self-care and well-being. This can include exercise, spending time in nature, practicing mindfulness or meditation, journaling, or engaging in hobbies that bring you joy. Taking care of your physical and mental health can positively impact your mindset.
Remember that managing your mind takes time and practice. Be patient with yourself and give yourself permission to experience the emotions that arise. With time, you can develop a more resilient mindset and navigate through challenging situations with greater ease.
Dealing with the impending death of a loved one or facing our own mortality can be an extremely challenging and emotional experience. Denial is a common coping mechanism that helps us protect ourselves from the overwhelming pain and grief associated with death. However, it is important to acknowledge and accept the reality of the situation in order to begin the process of healing and finding closure. Here are some suggestions to help you navigate the emotions and avoid denial during this difficult time:
- Educate yourself: Understanding the physical and emotional aspects of death can help you come to terms with the reality. Learn about the medical condition or circumstances surrounding the impending death. This knowledge can help you process the situation more rationally.
- Seek support: Surround yourself with a supportive network of family, friends, or professionals who can provide comfort and understanding. Sharing your feelings and fears with others who have experienced loss can help you face the reality of death and process your emotions.
- Express your emotions: Give yourself permission to experience a wide range of emotions, including sadness, anger, fear, and even denial. It's natural to have mixed feelings during such a challenging time. Find healthy ways to express your emotions, such as talking to a trusted confidant, writing in a journal, or engaging in creative outlets like art or music.
- Practice mindfulness and self-care: Take care of your physical and mental well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy, provide relaxation, or help you feel grounded. Practice mindfulness techniques, such as deep breathing or meditation, to help you stay present and process your emotions without judgment.
- Communicate openly: Have honest conversations with your loved one or with yourself about death and the feelings it evokes. Express your love, gratitude, and any unresolved issues. Open and compassionate communication can help create a space for acceptance and healing.
- Seek professional help if needed: If you find yourself struggling to cope with the impending death or experiencing prolonged denial, consider reaching out to a therapist or grief counselor. They can provide guidance, support, and tools to help you navigate this difficult process.
Remember, everyone grieves differently, and there is no right or wrong way to feel or process death. It's okay to take your time and be patient with yourself. Allow yourself to grieve, and over time, you will find your own path towards acceptance and healing.
Want to work with me? Have questions? Learn more at www.drfaryal.com
It's a real thing, although I am not sure I have heard it call this. Mom Rage is when you lose your s$@! as you are trying to be a good parent and set a good example. Well, as you can imagine, it leaves a terrible after taste. How is you? What were you thinking? Shame in all aspects of our lives can be overwhelming, but our shame around how we parent and how every interaction with our kids can leave a lasting impression on them, can lead to regret and endless spiral into self judgement.
I don't want that for you.
So this mother's day weekend, take a listen to this episode. And remember: If it's hysterical, it's historical. It's your trauma response coming out to fight for you somehow. Give yourself grace and move on. You are doing the best you can.
And remember: When you know better, you do better.
I was mortified: The last podcast was a DISASTER. I was so ashamed that I could not record another episode. You have to listen to this episode to know what I am talking about.
Shame is a complex and intense emotion that can be difficult to overcome, but it is possible with patience, self-compassion, and a willingness to work through the underlying issues. Here are some strategies that can help:
Recognize and name the shame: The first step to overcoming shame is to identify and acknowledge it. Recognize the thoughts and feelings that arise when you experience shame. Try to name the specific emotion, such as embarrassment, guilt, or humiliation.
Practice self-compassion: Shame can be a self-critical and self-destructive emotion, but self-compassion can help counteract these tendencies. Treat yourself with kindness, understanding, and acceptance. Acknowledge your mistakes and shortcomings, but don't beat yourself up over them.
Challenge negative self-talk: Shame often arises from negative self-talk and beliefs, such as "I'm not good enough" or "I'm a failure." Challenge these thoughts by examining the evidence, questioning their validity, and replacing them with more positive and accurate self-talk.
Seek support: Shame thrives in isolation, so seek out supportive friends, family members, or a therapist who can provide a safe and non-judgmental space to process your emotions and experiences.
Take action: Shame can be paralyzing, but taking action can help you feel more empowered and in control. Identify small steps you can take to move forward and make positive changes in your life.
Practice vulnerability: Shame often arises from a fear of being vulnerable or exposing one's true self. Practicing vulnerability by sharing your thoughts and feelings with others can help build trust, connection, and resilience.
So there you have it, if you go through what I had to go through maybe take the above steps to get over your shame. Before I forget: Go to www.drfaryal.com/retreat2023 to sign up for the retreat in Hawaii. I hope to see you then.
I am so excited to share my episode with you.
Corinne Crabtree is an amazing human success story. A young mom with very humble beginnings, struggling to lose weight and find her way to happiness, she had one AHA moment and never looked back. After successfully losing more than 100 pounds and keeping it off, she decided it was time she helped others do the same. This doing the same turned into an 8 figure business and now she is out there teaching us how to get out of our own way so we can be successful, too.
I hope you'll enjoy her story as much as I did. To learn more about her go to www.nobsweightloss.com and listen to her podcast "Losing 100 pounds with Corinee".
Corinne Crabtree needs no introdcuction if you are a Life Coach. If you are not, she is an amazingly successful businesswoman who shines in terms of relatability. She has personally lost 100 lbs and started being a weight loss coach when she thought she could teach the skills. Learning has been breathtaking to her and she continues to have a learner's mind. She not only owns a multimillion dollar business but now is going to teach her skills to new clients. Whether it's weight loss or business, she will teach you how to simplify things. To learn more about her, check out her website.
www.nobsbusinesswomen.com
She also discusses how you can work with her for advanced certification at No BS Woman University. Enjoy my talk with her. You will be happy you did.
Can you practice medicine on your own terms?
We hear this all the time, but what does that even mean?
This week I am at the White Coat Investor Conference 2023, one way I like to invest in my own financial literacy for myself and my family. I thought it would be the perfect time to showcase a physician who is an inspiration to me. Dr. Una is the creater of so much goodness in the world of medicine: EntreMD is not only one of my favorite podcasts, it is also a place you can learn to work with other physicians who want to learn more about working as an entrepreneur.
I think you would love my conversation with her. In this episode you will learn how can you get out of your own way to start something completely new.
Learn more about all her amazing work and resources by checking out:
www.entremd.com You will be so happy you did.
As women, we can do hard things. We know this intuitively, but still, some how, some where in our brain, we are told that we are not good at math; that we are not good with money.
This is even true with women physicians. Why is that?
This episode with my special guest Dr. Latifat Akintade will change the way you think about money.
It was such a pleasure to listen to her story and her mission. Do not miss this episode. See how you, too, can do hard things.
You can learn more about Dr. Akintade by listening to her podcast and visiting her site at www.moneyfitmd.com
How much of your brain power goes into deciding what you should be eating everyday?
Do you struggle with your relationship with food?
Do you feel like most of the time, you are pre-occupied with what you should or should not eat?
We spend most of our adult lives as women, trying to either lose weight or eat better than before. Some struggle more than others. Our love-hate relationship with food does not get much better when faced with serious illness. My guest today will tell you all you need to know about what is wrong with the diet industry today. Dr. Trina Dorrah is a delightful and brilliant physician and a life coach who has made it her mission to help you break your cycle of dieting based on bad advice you were given.
You do not want to miss this episode. You can learn more about her by listening to her Podcast "Diet Culture is BS" as well as learn more about working with her on her website www.foodfreemd.com
Should you leave your employed physician role and do something entirely differnt with your life?
Well, I did.
It's been exactly a year. Tune in as I will share with you my personal story of leaving a well established position to follow my passion and purpose.
I will share with you what you can and cannot do.
Should you stay or should you leave?
What does it take to leave your comfort zone today?
One of our closest friend had a brush with something entirely unpleasant: thankfully it all ended up well. Are you living a life that if things took a wrong turn, you'd be happy you were doing what you were doing? I hope so.
In this episode, we will dive into why this matters and why you should care.
Do you want to work with me as a coach? Click here to sign up for a one on one call to see how this will change your life today.
I almost ran over a dog last week.
It was horrible and I was shocked for a good hour afterwards. This got me thinking, if we are distracted by what is in the here and now, what are the chances that we may get into a car accident?
Getting ourselves, our loved ones or even other people's pets in danger.
My clients struggle with mindfulness. They think it is about meditation in a quiet room on pillows with incense burning. While that is one type of meditation, the truth is the goal is to stay focused on the here and now: not be a victim to your constant stream of thinking; to rise above your drama and narratives you may be creating. This week's episode, I will share with you that a good practice of mindfulness can be our relationship with our driving.
- Are you paying attention?
- Are you listening to a podcast?
- Are you deep in thoughts listening to songs that can remind you of powerful emotions?
What if you turned all the distractions off?
And then, What if you only listened to the ambient noise and paid attention to the speed limit changes at every turn?
Why do we reflect at the end of the year?
I think, it's similar to reflecting at the end of life. Except, we're not exactly dying. Some how, this reflection offers us a clean slate. A world of possiblities. Things can go right, why can't they?
Think about a patient who is faced with terminal cancer: The physician says there is a 5% survival rate.
What do you think the patient believes? "I am shooting for the 5%".
No matter how much we are plagued with negativity, end of the year brings a wind of positivity. Somehow next year could go better than this year.
I can finally eat better. Working on my relationship with my partner, spouse, kids...
I can get my act together and have better time management.
There is a hope that if there is 5% chance of survival from all that weighed you down for the past decades of your life, you are going to beat it.
So join me in this wonderful podcast where you will learn how to look at your life story (backwards and forwards) to get you to a place of acceptance and ACTION.
And, if you want to join me to learn more about how to do just that, go to my website to sign up for the Intentional Living Coaching and Yoga program that starts TOMORROW.
www.drfaryal.com/2022
Holidays feel like magic. Except when they don't.
Most importantly during an experience of loss. Any loss, but mostly when we lose a loved one. Or, when we are hosting loved ones who have lost a loved one.
When I held a virtual meeting as a support and coaching opportunity for women physicians, I was asked to make some of that information public. I am shareing the beginning of that session here with you.
Feel free to share this with those you think may benefit from this wisdom to do less.
You have my permission to:
- Skip the holiday cards
- Skip having friends over for dinner
- Skip going to friends for dinner
- Skip exchanging gifts
- Skip people pleasing so OTHERS feel better
I hope this helps you in the smallest way possible.
Are you panicked about your kids getting older and leaving the nest?
English is not my first language: This was obvious from the first episode you listened to in this space. I don't look at it as a handicap but an opporunity to think deeper.
I have been thinking about the idea of our 'well-being'. Like looking at what it means and then wondering if there is a way to look at in a way that brings more peace and awareness to the state of our life.
In this episode I am going to teach you how to stop thinking about non essential and non helpful thoughts that subtract instead of add life to your life.
You do not want to miss this episode.
To learn more: go to www.drfaryal.com
What is Gratitude?
Should you be enjoying your life because others have so much worse than you? Should you finish your meal because there are people starving on the other side of the globe?
One of my favorite teachings of Eckhart Tolle is around the concept of Gratitude. It is not appreciate the abundance of anything. It is simply acknowledging the good that is our life this very momement. Gratitude is appreciating the life that is around you. The trees. The sky. The smell of food being made. The act of washing the dirty dishes. Our ability to be in the here and now and the APPRECIATING the here and now: with whatever form it is taking. That is our power to experience life fulling. To reach a state of giving attention to our conscious being in the here and now.
That is our power and the space in which we can manifest the beauty of miracle of life every day: whether we are facing a serious illness or not.
Today is the last day to sign up for my free coaching to help guide you manage your mind about what it means to live a full and intentional life to have awareness of the power of now.
To learn more, join me by signing up www.drfaryal.com/thanksgiving
Three years in the making...
I have been planning on attending this retreat that kept getting reschuled. So finally, here we are in Maui. Spending 6 glorious days with Eckhart Tolle and his deep tranformative teachings. I wanted to share with you some quick pearls that I think can help you feel grounded and more connected to the here and now.
Also, if you want to join my coaching this December, go to my website to learn more. https://www.drfaryal.com
"You are going to beat this. Be positive." One of the sayings that I hear family members tell their loved ones as they have only days to live. Power of positivity is undeniable. Today's podcast is going to offer you another way of being. To allow yourself to feel all the emotions means that you understand that life is inherently 'Bittersweet'.
Keeping hope in your back pocket as a breath of fresh air is always powerful. But it is equally powerful to sit in your sadness and grief. It's valuable for you to sit with worry, sorrow and the overwhelming emotion of 'I was not ready for this.'
Constant sense of looking at the bright side, keeps us wanting to turn the page on all the emotions that we should be experiencing here and now. There are people who will use pep talk because they do not know what else to say. In this episode I offer you a teaching I share with my clients: Holding life in two hands. It's not either or. It is hopeful and sad that you are diagnosed with a terminal illness. There is room for sadness and not expressing our negative emotions will only lead to further isolation: something no one wants to experience during serious illness.
So join me in sharing this episode for all who are suffering with a serious illness and want to 'only' focus on the positive. It can sometimes do more harm to do that.
Also, know that I want to teach you these way of thinking with my December Coaching for Women Physicians. Go to www.drfaryal.com to learn more.
I missed my wedding anniversary.
I was trying to be the voice of so many people that I lost my voice. Literally and figuratively. Has this happened to you?
Have you said yes to so many things in your life that un-intentionally you start saying no to the things that matter to you?
Like dropping your kids off at school with a full Halloween costume?
This episode is for anyone who needs a reset. Come back here. We are going to do so much this month. All that is good and will make a difference in your life.
But start by committing to a No-vember, saying No to what you don't want to get Yes to what you want.
We are in the third week of Iran's uprising.
After last week's episode, I had so many requests from my audience asking "What can we do?". So I reached out to a brilliant Iranian American Scientist who has been an inspiration to many people around the world.
My guest today is Dr. Firouz Naderi. He held many executive positions during his 36 years at NASA's robotic space missions leading to becoiong NASA's program manager for Mars exploration in 2000. He received NASA's Distinguished Service Medal in 2005 which is considered its highest award.
After retiring from his position, he remains an active advocate for the Iranian-American dispora formerly having served on the board of directors of Public Affairs Alliance of Iranian American (PAAIA).
I reached out to him to share his thoughts about what is happening in Iran, what are some actionable items listeners can put in practice.
In other news, Shervin Hajipour, the singer of "Baraye" song that I played on the podcast has been released on bond. There is a collective movement to nominate his song for Grammy's under the "best song for social change".
You may submit your vote at https://songforsocialchange.grammy.com
I hope you enjoy this special podcast.
To follow Dr. Firouz Naderi on social media, please do so on Twittter @Firouz_Naderi
Consider to keep posting about the political injustices in Iran by sharing hashtags. #Mahsaamini, #Nikashakarami, #iran
We are in the third week of Iran's uprising.
After last week's episode, I had so many requests from my audience asking "What can we do?". So I reached out to a brilliant Iranian American Scientist who has been an inspiration to many people around the world.
My guest today is Dr. Firouz Naderi. He held many executive positions during his 36 years at NASA's robotic space missions leading to becoiong NASA's program manager for Mars exploration in 2000. He received NASA's Distinguished Service Medal in 2005 which is considered its highest award.
After retiring from his position, he remains an active advocate for the Iranian-American dispora formerly having served on the board of directors of Public Affairs Alliance of Iranian American (PAAIA).
I reached out to him to share his thoughts about what is happening in Iran, what are some actionable items listeners can put in practice.
In other news, Shervin Hajipour, the singer of "Baraye" song that I played on the podcast has been released on bond. There is a collective movement to nominate his song for Grammy's under the "best song for social change".
You may submit your vote at https://songforsocialchange.grammy.com
I hope you enjoy this special podcast.
To follow Dr. Firouz Naderi on social media, please do so on Twittter @Firouz_Naderi
Consider to keep posting about the political injustices in Iran by sharing hashtags. #Mahsaamini, #Nikashakarami, #iran
On September 13th, a 22 year old Kurdish girl named Mahsa Amini, who had come to Tehran for a mini vacation with her family was detained by the "Morality Police" for having improper hijab or head covering. 3 days later, she was declared brain dead in an ICU and her body was returned to her grieving family.
One week later, a young artist by the name of Shervin Hajipour, had performed a song by tying together people's tweets about why they are demonstrating in protest.
It's bigger than Mahsa Amini. It's bigger than Hijab.
The song had garnered millions of listeneres.
24 hours later, Shervin was arrested by the Iranian governement and his song was removed from his social media accounts.
If you want to help out and let the rest of the people who are demonstrating to remember her name, what can you do?
What is the least you could do?
If you are faced with helplessness about what it happening thousands of miles away from where you live, how can you act so you can have an impact?
There is so much injustice in this world.
Right now, in the country of Iran there are people who are demonstrating for their rights to have freedom of choice. The choice to live in a free world.
On Saturday, October 1st, I am holding a Q and A zoom meeting to answer questions for you as well as share with you steps you can take to support and honor the likes of Mahsa and Shervin.
To learn more sign up on my website http://www.drfaryal.com
On September 13th, a 22 year old Kurdish girl named Mahsa Amini, who had come to Tehran for a mini vacation with her family was detained by the "Morality Police" for having improper hijab or head covering. 3 days later, she was declared brain dead in an ICU and her body was returned to her grieving family.
One week later, a young artist by the name of Shervin Hajipour, had performed a song by tying together people's tweets about why they are demonstrating in protest.
It's bigger than Mahsa Amini. It's bigger than Hijab.
The song had garnered millions of listeneres.
24 hours later, Shervin was arrested by the Iranian governement and his song was removed from his social media accounts.
If you want to help out and let the rest of the people who are demonstrating to remember her name, what can you do?
What is the least you could do?
If you are faced with helplessness about what it happening thousands of miles away from where you live, how can you act so you can have an impact?
There is so much injustice in this world.
Right now, in the country of Iran there are people who are demonstrating for their rights to have freedom of choice. The choice to live in a free world.
On Saturday, October 1st, I am holding a Q and A zoom meeting to answer questions for you as well as share with you steps you can take to support and honor the likes of Mahsa and Shervin.
To learn more sign up on my website http://www.drfaryal.com
Has colonoscopy given you a reason to be more mindful?
The funny thing is we often associate mindfulness with a retreat or a relaxing meditation session in a beautiful location. Learn how a day of undergoing colonoscopy with medication coctail that was less than ideal taught me some deep lessons about life and being in the moment.
How are you going to carve out time for your life to be in the here and now?
You don't need to schedule yourself to have a colonoscopy to do it, but listen how any disturbance in your life flow can be an opportunity to focus on here and now.
Learn more on my website: www.drfaryal.com
Has colonoscopy given you a reason to be more mindful?
The funny thing is we often associate mindfulness with a retreat or a relaxing meditation session in a beautiful location. Learn how a day of undergoing colonoscopy with medication coctail that was less than ideal taught me some deep lessons about life and being in the moment.
How are you going to carve out time for your life to be in the here and now?
You don't need to schedule yourself to have a colonoscopy to do it, but listen how any disturbance in your life flow can be an opportunity to focus on here and now.
Learn more on my website: www.drfaryal.com
When a very physically well person gets cancer, we always wonder: How did this happen?
As if cancer only happens to unwell people.
This week's special guest, on my 100th episode of the podcast, is a friend, physician colleague and Persian friend who was diagnosed with cancer while doing all the right things.
Or, so she thought.
In reflection and hindsight always being 20/20, Dr. Parastoo Jangouk shares with us how a diagnosis of cancer made her make a full 180 on how she was living her life.
To learn more about her, check out her website www.mindgutfitmd.com
Follow her on her popular instagram @doctorparastoo
Also, this is the LAST week to sign up for the October Retreat in Hawaii. go to my website to learn more. www.drfaryal.com
When a very physically well person gets cancer, we always wonder: How did this happen?
As if cancer only happens to unwell people.
This week's special guest, on my 100th episode of the podcast, is a friend, physician colleague and Persian friend who was diagnosed with cancer while doing all the right things.
Or, so she thought.
In reflection and hindsight always being 20/20, Dr. Parastoo Jangouk shares with us how a diagnosis of cancer made her make a full 180 on how she was living her life.
To learn more about her, check out her website www.mindgutfitmd.com
Follow her on her popular instagram @doctorparastoo
Also, this is the LAST week to sign up for the October Retreat in Hawaii. go to my website to learn more. www.drfaryal.com
Do you feel guilty spending money on yourself?
When people complement you on the life you have created, do you try to act small and deflect the attention?
You deserve all that you have created in your life and need to own up to all your success.
In this episode I will share with you how my daughter's little expression has changed how I live my life.
Join us as we celebrate being who we are in Turtle Bay Resort on Oahu in October for a very special retreat. To learn more, go to www.drfaryal.com
Do you feel guilty spending money on yourself?
When people complement you on the life you have created, do you try to act small and deflect the attention?
You deserve all that you have created in your life and need to own up to all your success.
In this episode I will share with you how my daughter's little expression has changed how I live my life.
Join us as we celebrate being who we are in Turtle Bay Resort on Oahu in October for a very special retreat. To learn more, go to www.drfaryal.com
If you are faced with a life changing diagnosis, Troy Strawhecker has a message for you:
"It's going to be ok."
But he'll tell you: 30 years ago he almost didn't make it.
As a young adult, he was diagnosed and had to go through the treatment of, not one, but two type of cancers. I really wanted to have him share his story. He is such a genuine and good hearted friend. When he looks back at his life, he can be vulnerable to break the stereotype of what surviving cancer does and does not mean. Most of us will never get the chance to be the fly on the wall of people's lives who survive cancer. This story is a great inside look.
What it means to have an open and grateful heart. What it means to be imperfectly perfect every single day of our lives. No matter what hand life deals us.
On this 30th anniversary of "You're Good to Go" announcement from his doctor, let's hear it for all who have walked the walk many don't get the chance to complete.
I hope you enjoy this special story.
You may know her as the mother of all support groups for women physicians in the world. Dr. Hala Sabry-Elnaggar may need no introduction, but she is the person who has single-handedly created the most meaningful community for physicians all over the world. Today's episode will be a great introduction to how her mind works: One decision at a time. She has faced personal tragedies and adversities with that simple rule. When her mother was dying of cancer, she made Hala promise her to this one thing... Listen more to learn. To learn more about her Reconstructive Breast surgeon, go to www.theiabr.com. Also, if you are interested in joining us for our Hawaii retreat, go to www.drfaryal.com to learn more.
When faced with a serious illness, we are forced to stop and pivot. We change how we eat, we change how we move through life and how we manage our relationships. What if you made that stop before you got sick? If you are a runner, there are 'rest days' that are intentionally planted in running programs so you avoid injury. How about in your life? Do you have rest days, weeks or hours in your life to allow for yourself to recover and avoid injury? I hope this week's episode allows you to give yourself permission to pause and pivot if you need to do so. For even more intentional pause and presence, consider joining me for my retreat. Check out www.drfaryal.com/Retreat2022
In life, we are going to meet a lot of people. As physicians, we will meet many patients along the way. There are many good questions that we can ask which will foster understanding and connection. One question that does neither is "Where are you from?". Today is the 33rd year anniversary of when I permanently moved to the United States of America. While I have lived all over the US, no matter where I go, I always get asked this question. In the interest of saying what we mean and meaning what we say, I will share with you my take on how this question is received by the other person, and give you a moment to pause and ask yourself: What do I really want to know about this person? Then, ask them that question exactly. Want to learn more about how to talk to people, go to my website to get the free guide. www.drfaryal.com
I remember when I first heard about hospice, I thought it was only for patients dying of cancer. But then, what about millions of others who are dying a very slow and unseen death of brain failure? What do we do with and for dementia patients? So much of the actual care is carried and delivered by the unsung heros of the stories: Families and care givers. My guest today, Amy Shaw, is a brilliant and compassionate Physician Assistant that will guide us through what we know and what we should know. Feel free to share this episode with those you love. Are you interested in a RESET to get yourself jump start to a better version of you that goes from Chaos to Calm? Go to www.drfaryal.com/reset to learn more.
We were all getting excited for the summer. That's when my daughter came down with COVID. I remember in residency my chief used to say: If it's not one thing it's another. And sometimes it's one another after another. We are confused about our plans when the unexpected happens. What if we used all those bumps and unexpected events as intentions to navigate life with more ease and contentment? I want that for all of us. That's why I am inviting you to sign up for my Summer Reset: 5 days of consecutive coaching to manage our minds around all that overwhelms us. Join me at www.drfaryal.com/reset.
In light of this week's tragedy of the mass shooting that took place in Texas, I wanted to offer you peaceful advice you can use.
A starbucks Barista in Uvalde, the city the shooting took place, asked the customer if they were caring for themselves in this time of unimaginable loss. The customer asked the same questions in return. That's when the Barista shared that she works in San Antonio, but decided to come help so the Starbucks workers in Uvalde could have the day off to grieve.
"Love in Action" means that there are things you can do to make a difference. "Thoughts and Prayers" is not one of them.
In this episode I will share with you what you can do in times of "Collective Grief".
How do you manage grief?
Does your pain go away if you avoid it? Should you try to 'have a different way of looking at your life'? Does being in denial of the loss that has happened to your life help you move forward? How can you be sad and be grateful at the same time? In this episode, we will talk about all type of losses: Loss of a dog, a life that could have been and the loss of a future that you will never have. I hope you enjoy this episode. Interested in joining me in October? Learn more at http://www.drfaryal.com/Retreat2022
My dad had a saying that I have been telling my kids for years. "It's raining: it's not raining on YOU". This week's podcast I want to teach you about a mindset shift that will change your entire weather, without the help of anyone. There are things we have no control over in life: Like how the weather in Hawaii will be on our anniversary trip. Then, there are things we have absolute control over: Like how the internal weather is going to be like when the weather is terrible in Hawaii. Let me help you pivot to have a better weather inside, no matter what is happening in your life. Are you interested in joining us for the retreat? The spots are limited: check out www.drfaryal.com/Retreat2022
Some people wonder: 'Now that I am cancer free, how should I live my life?'. I get asked this question by my clients. They want to know how they can stop sweating the small stuff and appreciate life more fully now that they are out of the woods. The truth is, there is no out of the woods. There is also no 'in the woods'. If you are able to live your life from a place of 'There is no there, there', you are so much more likely to live every minute fully exactly as your life was meant to be lived. The idea of pursuit of happyness in itself is a fallacy. This week's episode will tell you why. Also, interested in the retreat? Go to www.drfaryal.com/retreat to sign up.
I often say, "Aging is a privilege denied to many." When I say this, I am trying to make my patients, and clients have some perspective that it's ok to get older and there is celebration in the very fact that we lived long enough to be here this moment. But, this week, I want to share the story of my client, who misses her beautiful singing voice. With her permission, I am sharing the beautiful song of Lucy Simon who's a reminder to all of us that we can celebrate our current life as well as grieving the life we used to have. It's ok to do both.
Boston Marathon is probably one of my most favorite athletic events in the US. It's an opportunity for those of us who live an ordinary life, partcipate in an extra ordinary event. Running in the same path of the world's elite athletes with the best spectators yelling out your name is the most magical experience ever. Except when someone does more than an extraordinary act of running: my guest today not only ran the Boston Marathon that day, he got to save a life. Listen to his inspiring story.
When patients get ready to go into the operating room, they often want 'everything' done. Unfortunately, sometimes, this conversations leads to a very prolonged and painful experience in the hospital. Sometimes they make it out alive, and sometimes they don't. My guest today will focus on what it means to have these conversations well. Dr. Kim Fischer is a physician anesthesiologist and the founder of Lucid. To learn more about her amazing program please check her out at www.lucidadvocate.com
This is not an April's Fools Day Joke. This week, as I congratulate all my physician colleagues on National Doctor's Day, I'd like to talk to you about an unspoken truth: More and more, physicians are struggling with burnout and mental health issues, and more and more, they are either ignoring it, or getting 'underground' help. Not wanting to receive mental health help from their own medical group, from the fear of being reported to their medical boards, they are walking a slippery slope. More than 1/5 of actively practicing physicians are considering leaving medicine. These are the facts. We cannot look away. We need to do something. Share this episode with your medical group presidents if you need to: we need to get proper support.
You may not know my back story. When I was interviewed for Dex Randall's podcast "Burnout to Leadership", it occured to me that I shared some valuable advice for everyone to hear. I think these pearls are helpful for my own audience as well. What is it that peoplel don't know about end of life? Do I have any words of advice? Also, what is on MY bucket list? I hope you'll enjoy this candid conversation. Also, there's still time to sign up for the "Out with the Old" workshop. Go to www.drfaryal.com/spring to sign up.
There are no trophies for working ourselves to death. Yet, we keep showing up, working harder than the day before as opposed to pausing and pivoting to focus on our own well being and mental health. My guest today is a poster child of someone who turned his life around after not one by 2 near death experiences. Host of the podcast "Burnout to Leadership", Dex Randall is a brilliant and compassionate human that will tell you his life story to be inspired. Reach out to him at www.dexrandall.com
Welcome to a Masterclass in parenting. More importantly, welcome to an episode to answer all of your questions around adoption: what to say, what not to say, who should adopt, who shoudn't, and if you are considering adoption what are some advanced planning you should consider before getting started. Join my truly dear friend and an execptional psychotherapist Kristine Altwies, who is a mother of 5 children and the CEO of A Family Tree, for a one of a kind discussion. Learn more at www.afamilytree.org
In a special episode, I share my message of hope about what you CAN do in times of war and disaster. I reach out to my regular listeners in Ukraine, Russia and Poland to extend my love. I also reach out to the audience about what you can do at this moment to take some actions so that you are able to take away some level of human suffering, the best way you know how. Please email the support person at St. Jude's hospital if you are able to help Jennifer.McArthur@STJUDE.ORG
Sexual health is a very important part of our overall health. What happens when we are struck by an illness? Does sex have to take the back seat or do we get a chance to enjoy a meaningful pleasure filled sexual existence no matter how old or how ill? You may already know the answer to this, but listen to this week's episode to learn more about this topic based on my discussion with a dear colleague and sex educator Dr. Kelly Casperson the creator of the wildly popular podcast "You are not broken".
You don't have to do anything you don't want to be doing. Financial independence that comes from a place of intentional relationship with how we save and spend money allows us a freedom unlike any other. If you have this one life, how would you spend it? What is a purpose driven life look like? Would you stay in a job if it was not aligned with your values and goals? What would you do instead? How would you pick your next job?
One of my favorite artists is a Rwandan/Belgian singer named Stromae. He has a song called "Quand c'est?" In French it means when is it, but it pronounced as: Cancer. I have clients who are cancer survivors who keep thinking that they are about to have cancer again. I have patients who have cancer who are in denial that they are dying from it. In this episode, on the World Cancer Day, I am taking my voice to empower you to ask for Palliative Care as being part of your cancer treatment. To work with me as a patient or a client please go to www.drfaryal.com
Not only did Deborah decide to honor her son's life by donating his organs while he was alive. But she was able to have the clarity of mind to write a letter to his organ donor recepients letting them know they should not feel guilty. This type of love and generosity is almost unheard of. Listen to her story as she shares more details about what she went through. To learn more about her check her podcast here
To donate to Mile's Memorial for his school's robotic program, go here.
In this very special episode, I invite back my dear friend and previous guest on this show, Dr. Deborah Butzbach, a radiation oncologist and a grieving mother who lost her 13 year old son due to an accident. Her decision to donate Miles's organs as he was in the ICU touched me deeply and I believe it is a story worth telling. I hope you enjoy this two part series.
Have you had any close calls? Car crash, massive heart attack, near drowning, the list can go on an on? What about an urgent text that you were going to get hit by a missile? What would you do? What goes through your mind? Then, right after that... Do you shift gears and decide to live your life with a bit more purpose? I wonder if this makes you hold onto or let go of life easier. I hope this week's podcast can create some good food for thoughts for you. Learn more on www.drfaryal.com
The truth is we don't want anything to change. We don't want to be getting older. We don't want to lose the ones we love. We certainly don't want to be grieving the loss of those we love. Unfortunately, life has other plans in store for us. In the beginning of a year that follows a very difficult year for us all, it's my pleasure to share with a resource and a vision about growth through loss and grief. AmarAtma Khalsa is a board certified Chaplain and a Grief Coach. You will love listening to him and his sense of ease and acceptance. Learn more http://amaratmakhalsa.com
It's the New Year's Eve in the US. Some people are anxious. They had set some goals and aspirations for themselves and here's one more year that nothing panned out, truly. So where do we go from here? If you think about it, end of the year is actually an arbitrary assignment. In my part of the world, the year ends the day before the spring solstice. So, if it helps you, you have until March 20th of next year to get anything done. Jokes aside, I will share with you my reflection that it's better to look at your life in terms of if you accomplished anything that adds value to your life instead? If our reflections were different, our appreciation would change, too. Join me in my program to learn more. Http://www.drfaryal.com/2022
It's Christmas Eve. Where do you live? Do you have a white Christmas? If you don't, does it even matter to you? We all have ideas about what life should and should not be like. It turns out, we think the same thoughts about end of life. When we should and should not be dying. It has been my experience that if people had a say in their last days, no one wants to die this time of the year. They don't want to leave bad memories for their loved ones around this time of the year. What if we have no control? What if we told our dying loved ones that it's ok to let go. They can leave knowing we loved them, no matter when their lives ended. Join me on my webinar to talk about when and how to walk away. http://www.drfaryal.com/Goodbye
When it's your birthday, do you get a cake with a candle on top to make a wish? If you don't, what happened? How is that no longer a special day for you? I have learned that as we get older, we start taking our days and even amazing celebrations for granted. When the end of the year comes around, we start looking at how the year didn't go so well. How we fell short and didn't accomplish so much. How we, once again, did not stick to our plan and failed to lose the weight. In this episode, I am trying to encourage you to live your life fully. When you put up the Christmas tree, stay up a bit, pour yourself something to drink and enjoy it. Be a kid again.
This holiday season, people are going to drive you mad. They will say the wrong thing, do the wrong thing, behave in a way that you want to come undone. In this episode I will teach you how to feel instant love NO MATTER how people behave. If you make your experience of feeling love "conditional" on how others behave, you are the one who will suffer. In this special episode, I will share one of my lessons that I had put together for my group coaching. I hope it helps you, too. Share this with others you think may benefit from listening to this message. sign up to learn more www.drfaryal.com
Stranger than science fiction: In 1951 a new cell line were discovered that seemed to be immortal. These cells became the mainstay of scientific research, leading to more than 110,000 published studies as well as 3 Nobel Prizes. They were simply known as HeLa Cells. Her name was Henrietta Lacks; a 31 year old mother of 5 from Baltimore, Maryland who later died of an aggressive form of cervical cancer. In today's episode, we will talk about how while she had contributed so much to science and technology, her descendants struggle with educational debts attending same Universities that have used her cell lines for years. Listen to the backstory to this grassroot movement initiated by 3 women physicians to eradicate this debt. Please consider donating.
I call him LOML: Love of My Life. Others know him as my husband, Anthony Michaud MD, PhD. He's a Radiation Oncologist, but I think he's mostly a Windsurfer. You have heard me talk about him on and off on this podcast. On Thanksgiving Day, I decided to interview him for this special episode. Right after he beat me in a game of Scrabble by 20 points or so. He's an amazing human being. I love that he is so clear about what he does and does not want out of this life. He knows his priorities and tries to incorporate them into his life. I think you'd love his story. Go to my website to get my free guide to having better conversations. www.drfaryal.com
Eckhart Tolle once said: "Tell me what is the problem in your life this very moment?". My podcast was created for you to ponder that very question. Whether you are struck by an illness or you are just overwhelmed with the weight of the world at this very second, ask yourself: "How is my life perfect this very moment?". I had set out to create that sense of awareness and peace when I started this podcast. Today, I will share with you a feedback that touched me very deeply. I hope you enjoy this episode. You can always learn more about ways to reach me www.drfaryal.com
Ready for the most amazing story? When a 35 year old professional woman, who is not in a relationship, decides to adopt her own children, she makes a plan. She will contact men on a dating service every single day, and go on 3 dates a week to meet the potential father of her children. Can you imagine it? You have to hear my friend's story. If you are stuck or are wondering if there is anyone out there for you, this podcast is for you. In coaching, I teach my clients that whatever results you want to create, you simply put that in your plan. Then you decide to take the steps to get to that goal. Amy Rose's story will blow your mind. Visit my webpage for more on this story. www.drfaryal.com
Everytime someone young dies, we wonder how life could be so unfair. For every child who dies of terrible cancer, there are people who question their faith or meaning of life altogether. The truth is, life does not owe us anything. It does not owe us a happy ending. It does not owe us a long and healthy stretch. In this very special episode, as I actively mourn the loss of a very dear friend who was murdered last week, I will share with you that at the end of the day: this is life. No guarantees. No promises. We get to experience loss from that place of acceptance. The acceptance that suffering is part of living. Additional suffering, however, is merely optional.
Do you feel like you're about to snap? Leave your relationship, leave your job, or leave your profession altogether? You are not alone. Many people are walking in your shoes at this very moment. In this week's episode, I want to teach a lesson that will provide you peace of mind whether you decide to stay or leave. On my 16th Anniversary, let me give you the gift of perspective so you live your life from a place of love no matter what decision you make. For more go to www.drfaryal.com
My favorite episode is right here. My own sister is my best friend. In December of 2020, Dr. Kim Kaffenbarger decided to sign up for my program. She asked her sister, who happens to be her best friend, to follow along with her. 9 months later, they remain the best of friends and share their journey of self transformation with us all. You do not want to miss this episode. For more information about the program go to http://www.drfaryal.com
We all need help. No matter what your mission in life is, we can all get better at things we don't know much about. Even the best of the best athletes have their own coaches. Creating a vision and then learning how to make it a reality requires some outside help. In this week's special BONUS episode, meet my outside help. Bobby Klinck is a breath of fresh air: A Harvard Lawyer turned into a coach for online business, you would love his story. He has been my personal Marketing and Business Coach and he has a heart of gold. He is going to have a special event in early December and his early bird to sign up ends on October 21st. You may still sign up but to get the special bonuses, the time to sign up is now. Here's the link to sign up https://members.bobbyklinck.com/~access/a46c10731f
One of my favorite learnings I have picked up by having Jewish friends is the concept of Tikkun Olam. I am sure many other religions and belief systems have a similar teaching. It is the idea that we were born to not simply go through life. We were born with an intention to "Repair This World". If you were to look at your life like that, what would be your purpose? How would YOU repair this world? We often refer to this as our "WHY". There is so much confusion about what our why needs to be. I am offering this podcast as an extension of what I teach to my clients when we discuss how we go about finding a deeper meaning and purpose for our lives. Feel free to reach out to me at www.drfaryal.com with any questions you may have.
If you could only focus on what matters, what would that be? Do you even know? Sometimes we don't know because the outside noise is too loud. Remember getting interrupted in the middle of dinner by a telemarketer when we had landlines? Now that we don't have landlines, what interrupts your peace of mind? Could it be the constant uninvited but ever present social media? For the month of October, I have given up social media for a Digital Detox. I think that I may stick with it long term. Tune in to learn more. Reach out to me at Http://www.drfaryal.com
This week's episode is a very special one. When you think about grief and loss, are you thinking human loss? Have you ever lost a pet? Do you know someone who has lost a pet? How did it feel? We are just as speechless when a loved pet dies, but I think it's even harder to find the words. Sometimes, what we say is wrong. Join my dear guest Dr. Pegah Mehdizadeh as she mourns the loss of her precious Pashmak and Bijou. To learn more about resources to help with the loss of a pet, please visit: www.rainbrowbridge.com
We all have a story. How we get to tell those stories matter. Shara Turner is a tremendous human being who has set herself up to make impactful changes in lives of those touched by Trauma. How we see addiction will in turn lead to how we interact with those who suffer with addiction. Join me in this in depth discussion about how addiction is surviving in its most primitive way. Shara's interview will touch you deeply and I hope you will share it with those who could use this message.
In the year 2020, 42% of physicians reported feeling burnt out. Roughly one physician dies every day by suicide which is double the rate of general population. There is help. Sometimes we need to reach out, sometimes we need to reflect, be mindful, and help ourselves become more resilient. Sometimes we need to live a more aligned life with our values and purpose. Sometimes we need to focus on a greater good which helps us get a different perspective on life altogether. My "Living Intentionally" Coaching and mindfulness program sets the stage to help you get there. Learn more at www.drfaryal.com. In this week's podcast, I'll talk about what it means to move from one stage of life to another and focus on living a purpose driven life to help us bend and not break. What does it mean to focus less on success and more on living a valued aligned life? If you are having suicidal thoughts: Ask for help. 1.800.273.8255.
We all know what we have to do to get to what we want in life. The question is: Why don't we? As a palliative care physician I see quite a bit of regret at the end of life. I am here as a quick warning shot for you. There is still time. You get to show up in your life the way you have always wanted to... If, you agree to be ready to fail. If, you can manage your mind around being ok for things not to turn out the way you were planning. Can you do it? Join me for my free webinar www.drfaryal.com/intentions
Where do we get our compassion from? Where does it come from? This week I have a great friend and a wonderful nurse to tell us just that. Cheryl Nicponski is a Doctor's Nurse. That's a term I coined everytime I worked with a nurse who could have just as well been a doctor. She is bright, compassionate and a fierce advocate for all sorts of equality. It is my pleasure to have you listen to her story and learn how she gets be who she is and she keeps going. You will really enjoy listening to her.
How do you live your life? Did you know that no matter what kind of hand life deals you, you get to decide? You can be travelling to a tropical island to go diving and be caught in torrential rain. You get to love it. My guest this week is a Radiation Oncologist and a cancer survivor life coach. Not only does she live her life intentionally every single day, she also gets to hold space for all who struggle to live a full life after being diagnosed with cancer. It may not be easy, but she is equipped to make that happen. She is also mother to 4 boys. Tragically since this episode was recorded, she lost her youngest boy to an accident. Her 13 year old son Miles, had a chance to continue living by being an organ donor to very special patients. If you like to contribute to Mile's memory, you may do so at http://princetonfriendsschool.org/support-pfs/miles-brackin-memorial-fund
Compassion Fatigue. It means we are tired of caring. We can no longer give since we have been giving so long. The hospitals are full. There are no more ICU beds. Some hospitals are even turning away unvaccinated people. In this episode, I share some of my ways to manage our mind in these trying times. We can continue to love and care for unvaccinated people. They have done nothing wrong. Please take a listen.
Have you heard of a Birth Doula? Doulas have been around for thousands of years. They were essentially female companion for supportive purposes. It seems to me, there is no better time to take advantage of this support than when faced with end of life. Join me as I interview Janie Rakow who tells me about this amazing profession. You will find her at www.FareWellDoula.com for any question or interest you may have. I hope you enjoy this episode.
In financial world, we talk about "Cost of Living" quite a bit. When deciding to move somewhere, we often mention how it's not a good idea to go somewhere because the cost of living is higher. How about life? When deciding to go one way or another at a crossroad, try thinking of "Cost of NOT Living". On this anniversary episode, I will share how we decided to adopt a dog even though everyone was trying to talk us out of it. Attending to the need of our new family member took priority over timeliness of this podcast release. When you decide what matters to you, your decisions are always aligned with your values. Be intentional and be mindful in what brings you true meaning and joy. You will never be wrong.
Would you have dinner with someone you thought was racist? Is there any opportunity for a meaningful dialogue with those we disagree with. I worry that social media, or any media for that matter, is making us antisocial. We have become so quick to judge, unfollow, unfriend and categorize people in buckets we can understand. No matter what your political belief is, I invite you to listen to how we can reach out to one another and find love and common ground. I truly hope this episode helps you to close the gap.
We live in a world that creates expectations in our heads as what it means to be happy: We should get married and have children to know the true meaning of happiness. What if we can't? If we are unable for whatever reason, what does that mean about our chance of happiness the way society makes us feel? It is my pleasure to introduce Jenn, my mindfulness and yoga instructor, to you this week. Learn how a successful Marine Ecologist used mindfulness and yoga to tap into what it means to be whole- just as you are.
Do you work for a living? Are there people who go out of their way to make your life a little better? They try to literally add love and cheer to the lives of all who come in contact with them. If you have been lucky enough to have met them, I hope that you have the presence of mind to thank them and let them know how very special they are. This week, I am dedicating this episode to someone very special who died two years ago without my knowledge. Someone who tried to reach out to me without success. I love her. I miss her and I hope she's surrounded by squirrels.
If you only listen to one episode, make it this one. It is my absolute honor to interview my guest Dr. Katherine Shear. She is the expert on studying and treating complicated grief which is now known as Prolonged Grief Disorder. In this in depth and intimate interview, she not only asks about my own grief regarding loss of my father, but she tells us the how and why we experience grief the way we do. please check out the website http://complicatedgrief.columbia.edu for more resources.
As physicians, we have only learned to keep going. When we get into school, it feels like we are on a conveyor belt that we cannot get off of no matter what. Some people bend, but most people break. Not because they do not have what it takes, but because medicine takes so much from you. It is my absolute pleasure to share the story of Air Force Captain Jillian Rigert, DMD, MD with you. She went through so many ups and downs of self doubt, anxiety, anorexia, depression and suicidal ideation, but had the courage to come through creating a life on purpose.
"Why me?" This can be the first thought that comes to our mind when things go wrong. This can be with a new cancer diagnosis or when what you were setting out to do falls apart. Why not you? Can you rethink what is happening in your life so that you can change the "It's not fair" drama into "Nothing has gone wrong". The simplest way I can think about it is this: why not you? The universe does not owe us anything. Once we embrace this thought, navigating the full human experience becomes so much intentionally meaningful. Join me as I dive in deep.
We move through our lives getting irritated by how people treat and disappoint us. We live our lives having mediocre relationships with the people we think should love and adore us. We want people behave in such a way that they can be worthy of our love. What if we already loved them? Just the way they are with all their shortcomings. Are you perfect? Do you think others don't secretly wish you were different so THEY could love you, too? I ask deep questions for you to get the love you want.
We are often hardwired to go to the worst case scenario when faced with challenges. We try to put our better days conditionally on what could happen in another day. What if that day never came? Would you put your happiness on pause? What if you had stage IV metastatic cancer with 2% chance of survival? Would you audition for a popular TV show? Come to think of it, if not now, then when? Join me as I share one of my favorite coaching tools to help you get unstuck from your negative thinking loops.
What is the meaning of life? Often times, when faced with end of life and terminal cancer, patients are faced with a sense of doom. This sense can feel anything from isolation to depression, anxiety and absolute helplessness. There have been randomized controlled trial studies for the past 40 years or so regarding the value of using psychedelic mushrooms such as Psilocybin to combat these feelings. In this episode I will talk about how this line of treatment maybe what we all need as our preparation for our very last trip.
Smartphone and internet addiction is a real life sucker. It increases loneliness and depression. It fuels anxiety. It increases stress. It can exacerbate attention deficit disorder. It can diminish our ability to concentrate and think creatively. It can disturb your sleep and encourages self absorption. In today's podcast, inspired by a coaching client, I talk about how to set better example for our kids managing this dependence.
Telling stories is what connects us all as humans. Using narrative medicine to humanize the experiences we have around illness and disease is the highest form of self reflection and therapy. Join me as I interview Ms. Wendy Hind, PhD, JD, who tells us the story of her son William. By using poetry, she creatively celebrates her life experience as a mother of a child born with a cardiac congenital defect. This episode will motivate you to tap into your creative senses. Follow her at tinypoetryproject.com
You may have never thought about this, but a disease is not the same thing as an illness. To best tend to our own and our patient's disease, we must first think about what they think of their illness. In this episode, I will teach you the tools to ask the right questions in life to get the answers that give you a better result. This is regardless of whether you have an illness or are just overwhelmed in life. Our thoughts lead to all of our results in our lives including how we experience a disease.
When faced with the reality of a child's rare and serious illness, we often wonder: What Do We Do? Well, I am so happy to share Dallas Graham's story with you. He single handedly decided to create children's books authored by those very extraordinary children facing unimaginable obstacles. Red Fred Project is an organization that has put its heart and soul into creating legacy of the lives of those special children. Learn more at www.redfredproject.com
Imagine being an executive leadership educator guiding major healthcare organizations through significant changes, only to be faced with the most unimaginable personal crisis of your own. Dr. Anne Harbison shares her story of unbearable loss and her intentional road to personal growth and learning to reach a higher ground and purpose. Learn how she managed to put her story within the context of a book that was on her Bucket List. To purchase her autographed book try www.anneharbison.com
If our time is truly short, what are some of the things that you would love to accomplish? I mean if anything would be possible for you, what would manifest in your life? In this episode, I will talk to you about the impact that this podcast has had on the life of so many people both near and far. If one person can make this much impact, I invite you to wonder, what could be possible for you?
When you finish medical school and end up with a quarter of a million dollars worth of student loan debt, you may think you have no way out of this hole you have created for yourself. Allow me to introduce you to an amazing example of what is possible for all of us who want to practice joy and live a more intentional life. From playing cello, creating painting, and starting her own bakery, learn this amazing story of Dr. Jessie Benson chasing pure joy as a profession.
When we are faced with the end of our lives, we start fighting for more time. Ideally, this time would be spent doing the things we love to do, or doing the things that we wanted to do. The reality is, at that moment, we are in no shape to do what we have wanted to do. I am giving you the gift of time NOW. In this episode, I will teach you ways to find pockets of time to do what matters most to you most, today. Let's do this. You will love this episode.
Ever since I became a podcaster and a blogger, and also since I moved to Hawaii, I am approached by people wondering what it's like moving and living here. So many questions. I had to do my own search before moving here. Some of what I learned were true, some of it was not. I am joined by the amazing and accomplished Dr. Rupa Wong, also not a native of Hawaii, sharing our pearls about what it's like to create your life here.
In times of COVID, as our grief process has been stunted due to lack of in person services, it is so important to move at your own pace. There is no hurry. You move as you need to move. Slow and steady. The society may want you to be done already. People are uncomfortable being around grieving individuals. Sometimes they feel helpless. It is ok. It is not about them. I am giving us permission to take our sweet time until we are good and ready.
First day of spring. A brand new year. A new beginning. I hope you will take this ancient tradition and honor its practices. Offer forgiveness to those who have hurt you. Ask for forgiveness from those whom you have intentionally or unintentionally hurt in the past year. Every year is a new beginning. I wish you love, peace, health and prosperity. Happy New Year: NoRuzetan Pirouz!
All aspects of our lives are opportunities for growth. The sudden loss of a loved one, especially the same age or younger, always feels unsettling. Following many recent losses my colleagues and clients have been sharing with me, I felt like it was a good time to talk about how we should manage our mind during these unprecedented times. There is no urgency, other than that of feeling aware of all that we are and all that we can be.
For the longest time, I went to vacation to get away from my life. When your life is so uncontrollable that you feel like the only way you can find peace is parked somewhere far away, it is time to revisit this thought. I talk about how I would put away my phone in the security box just so that I could shut down the outside chatter. Let's talk about how you can do that without going to Mexico.
The first time I heard about "Death Cafe" on NPR, I thought it was the most brilliant way of normalizing discussions about death and dying. I think that if my podcast is similar to anything, I would have to say it would be like that space. Except that I am the only one talking here. When I learned that a virtual Death Cafe was happening, I had to invite the host to tell us more.
With all the talk about mindfulness and its positive effect on our lives, how do we go about incorporating the practice? As we have been socialized to feel accomplished once we complete a to do list, and judge ourselves when we don't, how do we practice acceptance? How can we decide what matters most so that we can focus on those priorities instead? In this mini-coaching session, I will share with you some of my tools to help you pivot and focus on what can ground you in stormy days of your life no matter what life throws at you.
What if this life is all there is? If you are a non-believer and don't envision an afterlife, how do you grieve and where do you reach out for like minded support? My guest today is a phenomenal activist, mother and grief support leader. When Rebecca Hensler lost her young son, she experienced first hand what it meant to be given the wrong type of support. As a non-believer, she wanted to created a safe support group for all who may need it some day. "Grief Beyond Belief" was created as a meaning making celebration of her son.
What is Therapeutic Presence? Can you just sit there with a patient, without offering any treatment or even medication and yet have a meaningful impact? Turns out the answer is easier than one might think. A 'healer' shares her story of why she was drawn to end of life care. As one might imagine, the story is not always linked to a death story. What if you wanted to provide the best of care for humanity from the very beginning to the very end?
As a little kid, did you look at people who were older and wondered about how their hair turned gray? Andrea did. Then she grew up to become a gerontologist because she loved to really study them. She ended up serving that vulnerable section of our society with so much heart and authenticity. Now she lives in Georgia working as a Marketing Director for a local Hospice agency. She shares her story with us today.
Why is a chaplain here?
I often hear that when we walk into a patient's room for a palliative care consultation. What is "Existential Distress"? I have been wanting to share the importance of chaplaincy and their work surrounding end of life care. Fred Grewe is a master story teller to help me do just that.
Sailing and Slow Travel. What is on your bucket list? There is so much we want to do with our lives until the very end. Some things are easy to keep doing, other things not so much. We talk about the first and last time I felt my father's dialysis thrill. Also, what it means to offer dialysis no matter how much time we have to live. Is it the right decision? Dr. Samra shares her amazing journey into medicine and answers my questions.
I had the absolute pleasure of taking part in a workshop led by Eckhart Tolle on Winter Solstice on December 2020. I wanted to hear about his take about how we should manage our emotions around this much death and suffering around times of pandemic. I can't think of any other joy than having him quote my all time favorite book: The Little Prince. Enjoy this treat.
We will all be hit by a serious illness diagnosis one day. How will we take that news? In a very heart touching episode, my dear friend and colleague, Dr. Sonal Haerter, shares her story of her father in law whom she lovingly calls her Dad. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and lived his life more than ever before. He taught her "The Value of Here and Now". She shares his story.
In a very special Christmas episode, I want to share with you one of my more popular blog posts titled "Alicia". While the details of the story of the patient is changed to protect his identity, Alicia is an actual person who was an angel personified that day for me. If you got to know her, you would agree with my assessment. I want us all to take a moment and appreciate oncology nurses during this time of the year. They are truly our unsung heroes.
What do you want to be when you grow up? What if that wouldn't give you much joy and you wanted to shift gears? My special guest today is a wildly popular financial blogger who happened to be a practicing anesthesiologist until very recently. Instead of buying into "The Sunk Cost Fallacy", he decided to pivot and creatively help the world in a totally different way-all while slow traveling the world with his wife and young children. I know you will love his story.
What if your beauty routine was owning one lipstick? I was asked to discuss financial matters that relate to handling end of life. Do we live our bucket list and spend money because of FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) or do we save money for the rainy days ahead and appreciate JOMO (Joy of Missing Out)? I share my perspective of "Save and Savor" as far as relating to my attitude regarding finance and intentional spending. I think this attitude would serve us well whether we are of good health or heading into the end of our lives.
It is unbelievable. Truly, if you have never heard of it, you may be thinking this is an urban legend or conspiracy theory of sorts. I wish your intuition was right. In a stranger than fiction episode, let Dr. Gilcrease tell you about the atrocities of a government that forcefully removes organs of its prisoners of conscience to sell to the rest of the world. Prepare to be shocked and find yourself running to fact check this episode.
Check out www.DAFOH.org
I wonder why is it that the oncologists are often the "Last Man" standing? When patients have no more options for life prolonging measures, they still want the final word to come from their oncologists and not their own free will. Dr. Gilcrease masterfully answers these difficult questions that we all struggle with. In a very heart felt episode, he shares all his highs and lows caring for his dying patients in the most compassionate way possible.
Palliative is from the Latin word pallium, which means cloak. When patients receive palliative care, they are cloaked with care and comfort as they receive focused pain and symptom management. I think there is another way we can cloak ourselves: To practice gratitude. In this Thanksgiving episode, I share with you two ways you can live a more grateful existence. It is my appreciation for your presence in this space. Mahalo!
'Name is Bond. James Bond'. Who does not get goose bumps when they hear those words? Yet when Sean Connery died last month, I had to ask myself: Did I know if he was still alive? There certainly was no mention or sighting of him. His wife released a statement that said he had dementia and it took its toll on him. "It was no life for him. He was not able to express himself in any way." She was happy he died in his sleep. Just how he wanted to die. Peaceful. At home.
As physicians, we often talk about 'Do No Harm'. We also know that culturally we associate feeding loved ones as loving them. Can these two ideas go against one another? Are there situations when inadvertently we feed our loved ones to death? When patients with end stage dementia are unable to swallow their food, how do we help family see that they are getting to the end of their road? Talking about the benefits of pleasure feeding by mouth, as opposed to artificial nutrition by tubes, tackles these emotional situations.
Hear the story of a patient who loved life so much that she wanted to live it her way until the very end. In this very special episode, we will listen to Dr. Deming from the last episode with her patient's daughter talk about Patsy. She was a fiercely independent woman who was very clear about her wishes. She was clear as to how she wanted to end her last chapter. Listening without judgment opens our minds.
I am very excited to share my special guest's story on the podcast: Dr. Katie Deming, who practices radiation oncology in the Pacific Northwest. As a doctor treating female patients with breast and gynecological cancer with radiation, she makes deep connections with her cancer patients. Listen to her story as how having volunteered in a hospice home led her to where she is today. We ponder whether the right questions are being asked during medical school application process to get the correct candidates care for our humanity. She shares her unique story with us on this podcast.
Patients with serious illness often want to know how much time they have left to live. It helps them plan. How to live the rest of their lives on their own terms. Do they want to keep coming back and forth to the hospital? Or do they want to spend the rest of their lives at home instead? We talk about prognosis discussions when it is not a timed based focus but rather functional or unpredictable prognosis.
We are sometimes asked by our patients about their prognosis. How much time do they have? While we may never know the exact answer to that question, we often have an estimate. Is it helpful to share that information with the patients? Can we assume that they actually want to know? In this episode, which is the first of two part series, I will share with you how to best approach those questions so that patients get to choose the right options based on the information at hand. I also share what not to do to protect our patients' fragile state of mind.
We often make assumptions about people. People often make assumptions about us. How do they make their assumptions? Are those right or wrong assumptions? Could it be because of how we live our lives? Is there a disconnect between what matters to us and how we live our day to day lives? Is it possible that if we lived our life on purpose and mindfully, when our time comes, we would be more ready to leave this world? Do we struggle to connect with other people because we misread them altogether?
Can you pause to learn what's most important even in the Emergency Room? My first guest is an ER physician who is also a board certified palliative care physician. Dr. Kate Aberger tells us her story of how she came to practice medicine the best way she knows how. She tells us how you can always have a medical pause when stakes are high.I am very excited to let her share her highs and lows of life in the front line caring for the living and the dying.
We do not want to get older. There are so many birthday cards making fun of getting older. We become despondent when as we get older, we become slower at life. As runners, we run slower. Our eyesight starts to go. Our hair turns gray. Our body starts turning into a shape of its own. I want you to know that aging is a privilege. We will talk about how we should not regret getting older. It's a privilege denies to many.
As palliative care physicians, we know how to hold space. In this episode, I will talk to you how it feels to hold space. I also talk about how it feels to be on the receiving end of when someone holds space for you. As physicians, it is our duty to know how to deliver difficult messages or have hard conversations.
When I started talking to friends about starting a podcast, they all wanted to know one thing: who is my audience? Was I talking to physicians or was my goal to reach patients? It is a difficult question. The truth is I believe if you are going to be struck with an illness in your life time, and you may die because of it, you should listen. I want to normalize conversation about life and death. I want to empower all of us to ask the right questions to get the right care. We explore what that really means.
Hope cannot possibly be inherently bad. In an earlier episode, we talked about how 'Hope is not a plan'. But, is there anything else we could hope for? In times of serious illness, are we hoping for the wrong things? If we are putting all of our energy for fighting a battle we cannot win (Death), are there other hopes that can add life to our living days? How to ask questions so we can get to those answers.
How do you talk with patients when the stakes are high? Can you establish trust with the patient, without taking away their hope, and aligning their wishes and goals with the medical treatment options we offer?
In this episode, we will talk about how the words we choose to communicate with patients allow us to have more meaningful conversations such that both parties get the best outcome possible. Patients empowered to make meaningful decisions and physician being able to deliver bad news without feeling overwhelmed or a sense of abandoning their patient.
When we are diagnosed with a terminal illness, we all hope for longer time. Even when odds are not in our favor, somehow, we believe that we are immune to what's to come. Somehow we may get to cheat death in the end. It's my experience that 'hope' ends up blindfolding us from the reality of our lives. Hope keeps us from making the right decisions to get us the ending we would want for ourselves. By imagining that somehow we are exception to the rule, we lose the objectivity to make decisions that may give us a better life, a better last chapter. In this episode, I empower you to ask the right questions from your patient, or if you are the patient, I encourage you to focus on what matters to you most.
In an introductory podcast, I will introduce myself to you. I am a palliative care physician with 20 years of experience. I have practiced medicine in Michigan, Arizona, California and now Hawaii.
You will hear about how I became interested in caring for seriously ill and dying patients. Why it matters to me that when struck by an illness, we should all have a say as to how our lives should end.
I want to empower physicians to have better conversations with their patients about their goals and wishes, without thinking that they are taking their hope away.
But most importantly, I want all of us to be encouraged to live a mindful life, one that allows us to appreciate the present moment. To consider checking off whatever is on our bucket list before it is too late.
The major culprit for starting this podcast was the COVID pandemic. As I felt alone on a geographically isolated island, away from so many of my colleagues struggling with unimaginable death and suffering on the East coast, I imagined providing a podcast to share my thoughts and training may prove to be helpful.
Welcome!