Intimate Covenant Podcast: Recent Episodes
Intimate Covenant -- Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Biblical Perspective for a Fuller Marriage and Extraordinary Sex! Most married couples want more for their marriage, especially when it comes to sex. Intimate Covenant offers biblical teaching and resources to help achieve oneness with your spouse, resulting in a fuller relationship and an extraordinary sex life. Warning: We cover necessary and important topics about the marriage relationship and sex. We use frank language without being crude or crass. Our approach is biblical and wholesome, but not intended for singles — especially not for children.
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Augustine and subsequent Medieval sexual theology have profoundly influenced modern Christian teachings on sexuality, often causing unnecessary shame and restrictions that aren't biblically based. During the Middle Ages, the influence of Augustine, with echoes of Greek philosophy, intensified into even more unnecessarily restrictive laws and unbiblical teachings about sex. Contrary to Augustine and classic Catholic doctrine, celibacy is not more holy than marriage. The Bible teaches that marriage and the pleasures of married sex are a gift from God.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free.
Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products.
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant - Dating Divas — https://thedatingdivas.myshopify.com?sca_ref=6278443.H6eWDeXGfx
Strengthening marriages one date at a time.
Shop from this link and your part of your purchase will help support Intimate Covenant. Check out their Sexy Subscription Boxes! - Honoring Intimates — https://www.honoringintimates.com/?ref=INTIMATECOVENANT
Modest and classy premium lingerie, model-free.
Get 20% off and support Intimate Covenant with your purchase. - Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/
Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market.
Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Support the show
Send us a text
Matt and Jenn explore how ancient Greek philosophy has shaped modern Christian attitudes toward sexuality, creating an unbiblical culture of shame and stigma around sexual desire.
• Plato's dualism in the 4th century BC separated body and soul, viewing bodily desires as inferior to spiritual pursuits
• Stoicism further emphasized suppression of passions, teaching that sex was only acceptable within marriage and solely for procreation
• The Apostle Paul directly confronted these philosophies, calling those who forbid marriage and require abstinence "liars" devoted to "deceitful spirits"
• Paul teaches in 1 Timothy 4 that everything created by God is good and should be received with thanksgiving
• The biblical solution to misdirected desire isn't suppression but redirection toward what truly fulfills
• Proverbs 5 instructs husbands to "be intoxicated" by their wives' love—language of abundance, not restraint
• Sexual desire isn't worldly or dangerous but God-designed to teach us about our need for connection
• Modern Christians must examine where their beliefs about sexuality come from—Scripture or Greek philosophy
Join us for our annual retreat, September 18-20th, focusing on ONEness in marriage. Register at intimatecovenent.com/retreat.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant - Dating Divas — https://thedatingdivas.myshopify.com?sca_ref=6278443.H6eWDeXGfx
Shop from this link and your part of your purchase will help support Intimate Covenant. Check out their Sexy Subscription Boxes! - Honoring Intimates — https://www.honoringintimates.com/?ref=INTIMATECOVENANT
Get 20% off and support Intimate Covenant with your purchase. - Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/
Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Support the show
Send us a text
Matt and Jenn use a cooking analogy to explore how great married sex requires more than just "spices" – it needs solid foundational ingredients of spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical connection.
• Adding more spice to bad ingredients doesn't make a dish better; it likely makes it worse.
• In struggling marriages, focusing solely on sexual excitement without addressing overall closeness leaves couples unsatisfied
• All aspects of intimacy (spiritual, emotional, mental, physical) are interconnected and strengthen each other
• The upcoming annual retreat will explore the theme "One" and these interconnected aspects of intimacy.
Join us for our annual marriage retreat, September 18-20, featuring special musical guest Trey Keller! Register at intimatecovenantcom/retreat. If you'd like to help couples attend through our scholarship fund, donate here:
https://intimatecovenant.com/donate/
Or, contact us at podcast@intimatecovenantcom
Check out Matt's interview by Nate Whitson of the *Get in the Fight Podcast
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products. - Dating Divas — https://thedatingdivas.myshopify.com?sca_ref=6278443.H6eWDeXGfx
Strengthening marriages one date at a time.
Check out their Sexy Subscription Boxes! - Honoring Intimates — https://www.honoringintimates.com/?ref=INTIMATECOVENANT
Modest and classy premium lingerie, model-free.
Get 20% off and support Intimate Covenant with your purchase. - Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/
Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market.
Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Support the show
Send us a text
Warning: We cover necessary and important topics about the marriage relationship and sex. We use frank language without being crude or crass. Our approach is biblical and wholesome, but not intended for singles — especially not for children.
Difficult conversations are at the heart of successful marriages, yet many struggle with vulnerability and emotional expression. We explore practical ways to share feelings authentically and address how to reveal past mistakes you've been hiding.
- Sharing your feelings can be a difficult conversation for some. This is a skill which may require intentional practice.
- Vulnerability is the heart of intimate relationships. Revealing the fullness of yourself is the only way to be loved for who you really are.
Join us on Patreon to access our Emotion Wheel and other helpful resources:
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free.
Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products.
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant - Dating Divas — https://thedatingdivas.myshopify.com?sca_ref=6278443.H6eWDeXGfx
Strengthening marriages one date at a time.
Shop from this link and your part of your purchase will help support Intimate Covenant. Check out their Sexy Subscription Boxes! - Honoring Intimates — https://www.honoringintimates.com/?ref=INTIMATECOVENANT
Modest and classy premium lingerie, model-free.
Get 20% off and support Intimate Covenant with your purchase. - Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/
Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market.
Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
Support the show
Send us a text
In this episode, Matt & Jenn tackle the concept of "organic sex" and whether truly spontaneous intimacy is even possible in a long-term marriage. The myth that good sex should just naturally happen without planning or effort has damaged many marriages and created unrealistic expectations.
• Sex is natural but not naturally perfect - it requires intentional cultivation
• Many couples believe the Hollywood myth that passionate encounters should happen effortlessly
• The best sex flows from creating space for connection across all dimensions of intimacy
• Physical intimacy is not separate from emotional, spiritual, and intellectual connection
• Seemingly "spontaneous" encounters are actually built on intentional groundwork
• Great sex isn't about spontaneity but about co-creating an environment where intimacy flourishes
• Most of what builds great sex happens outside the bedroom through everyday connection
• When couples focus on building multi-level intimacy, sex becomes a natural byproduct
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free.
Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products.
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant - Dating Divas — https://thedatingdivas.myshopify.com?sca_ref=6278443.H6eWDeXGfx
Strengthening marriages one date at a time.
Shop from this link and your part of your purchase will help support Intimate Covenant. Check out their Sexy Subscription Boxes! - Honoring Intimates — https://www.honoringintimates.com/?ref=INTIMATECOVENANT
Modest and classy premium lingerie, model-free.
Get 20% off and support Intimate Covenant with your purchase. - Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/
Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market.
Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
www.intimatec
Support the show
Send us a text
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share an encore episode about reassessing your expectations for your marriage and moving the trajectory of your relationship through personal investment.
- Mature past the selfish motivations of relationship and begin to see the true fulfillment of covenant love built on self-sacrifice — in your marriage and in your relationship to God.
- Instead of asking "What do I want FROM my marriage?", change your perspective with a new question: “What do I want FOR my marriage?” Consider what more you can offer toward your covenant?
- Begin the assessment of your relationship with humility and self-reflection. Then, have a conversation with your spouse to determine what you can do for them and for your marriage.
Download our State of the Covenant resource to help you assess your marriage and start the conversations to build better intimacy in 2025.
intimatecovenant.com/shop
Marriage Retreat 2025 registration opens February 14th: intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant - Dating Divas — https://thedatingdivas.myshopify.com?sca_ref=6278443.H6eWDeXGfx
Shop from this link and your part of your purchase will help support Intimate Covenant. Check out their Sexy Subscription Boxes! - Honoring Intimates — https://www.honoringintimates.com/?ref=INTIMATECOVENANT
Get 20% off and support Intimate Covenant with your purchase. - Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/
Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Support the show
Send us a text
In this "Christmas Q&A Potpourri" episode, Matt & Jenn are sharing segments from previous live Q&A sessions. We're answering the following questions:
- Should I sacrifice my desire for sexual intimacy if my spouse does not desire sex?
- What are your favorite topics of conversation for rejuvenation and reconnection?
- How do I handle my spouse being defensive when i ask them any question?
- How do I grieve unmet expectations?
- How often should we be having date nights and get-aways?
- Do you have any suggestions for making our bedroom a sacred space?
Get the "State of the Covenant" printable worksheet: https://intimatecovenant.com/shop/
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free.
Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products.
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant - Dating Divas — https://thedatingdivas.myshopify.com?sca_ref=6278443.H6eWDeXGfx
Strengthening marriages one date at a time.
Shop from this link and your part of your purchase will help support Intimate Covenant. Check out their Sexy Subscription Boxes! - Honoring Intimates — https://www.honoringintimates.com/?ref=INTIMATECOVENANT
Modest and classy premium lingerie, model-free.
Get 20% off and support Intimate Covenant with your purchase. - Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/
Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market.
Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Support the show
Send us a text
In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer the following listener questions:
- What advice do you have for couples that have great sex but struggle talking about sex? We’ve tried conversation starters but the answers are always brief.
- I’m ashamed how much value I place on my spouses physical appearance. Self-improvement is a good virtue, but how do I ensure my motives are not immoral or shallow
- I enjoy sleeping naked. My wife hates it. How can I encourage her to try & embrace it regularly. It's a great sensual way to enjoy each other without having sex.
- I crave physical touch (not just sexually), as a pursuer how do ask for this without coming across as needy? Rub my back, hold my hand, hug me. How do I ask?
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free.
Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products.
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant - Dating Divas — https://thedatingdivas.myshopify.com?sca_ref=6278443.H6eWDeXGfx
Strengthening marriages one date at a time.
Shop from this link and your part of your purchase will help support Intimate Covenant. Check out their Sexy Subscription Boxes! - Honoring Intimates — https://www.honoringintimates.com/?ref=INTIMATECOVENANT
Modest and classy premium lingerie, model-free.
Get 20% off and support Intimate Covenant with your purchase. - Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/
Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market.
Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Support the show
Send us a text
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share another set of clips from the Q&A session at our recent Annual Marriage Retreat. We cover the following questions:
- What ways can I warm my spouse up to more public displays of affection?
- Discuss navigating, in different seasons, sexual pursuer/responder roles switching. It's not a smooth transition and can be confusing.
- What if you are the sexual AND the emotional persuer??
- I love giving my wife oral pleasure. She never reciprocates yet enjoys receiving. How do I keep from feeling resentful & help her to grow her desire for this?
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free.
Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products.
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant - Dating Divas — https://thedatingdivas.myshopify.com?sca_ref=6278443.H6eWDeXGfx
Strengthening marriages one date at a time.
Shop from this link and your part of your purchase will help support Intimate Covenant. Check out their Sexy Subscription Boxes! - Honoring Intimates — https://www.honoringintimates.com/?ref=INTIMATECOVENANT
Modest and classy premium lingerie, model-free.
Get 20% off and support Intimate Covenant with your purchase. - Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/
Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market.
Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Support the show
Send us a text
This episode is an excerpt from the live Q&A session at the 2024 Annual Marriage Retreat. We’re sharing our response to the following question: “Can you go into further detail on how the act of sex can glorify God?” We’re also sharing our responses to questions about sex toys, solo masturbation, modeling a healthy sexual relationship for your kids, and when to talk to your kids about pornography.
We also want to thank the sponsors of this year's Retreat:
- Married Dance
- Coconu
- The Dating Divas
- Honoring Intimates
- Ginger & Peach
- Ultimate Intimacy
- Show Her Off
- The Adventure Challenge
- J. Parker
Please support these affiliate companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free.
Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — https://www.coconu.com
Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products.
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant - Dating Divas — https://thedatingdivas.myshopify.com?sca_ref=6278443.H6eWDeXGfx
Strengthening marriages one date at a time.
Shop from this link and your part of your purchase will help support Intimate Covenant. Check out their Sexy Subscription Boxes! - Honoring Intimates — https://www.honoringintimates.com/?ref=INTIMATECOVENANT
Modest and classy premium lingerie, model-free.
Get 20% off and support Intimate Covenant with your purchase. - Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/
Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market.
Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Support the show
Send us a text
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the complaint, "My spouse never initiates sex." So, whose job is it, anyway? How can I get my spouse to initiate more often?
- Whether it’s sexual connection or any other aspect of your relationship, if you sense a lack of it in your relationship, it’s up to you to initiate what is missing.
- If you feel like you are the only one initiating, keep striving. But, recognize — with gratitude — that your spouse may be contributing a whole lot more to your sexual and emotional relationship than what you immediately recognize.
- Responders, you can learn to initiate in ways that are comfortable for you and this effort will speak volumes of love to your pursuer.
Also, check out our eCourses, available on our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/courses
What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?
If you’ve been married for more than 5 minutes, you recognize that you and your spouse see sex differently. Our intention with this eCourse is to challenge you to think about your sexual relationship in ways that you might not have ever considered before. We want to facilitate deep introspection and fruitful conversations between you and your spouse to help you build intimacy and oneness.
Make Better Connections
We all suffer occasions when our attempts to connect are ignored or rejected. This course will help you make better connections in your marriage — emotionally and sexually. Learn to pursue and respond to your spouse with passionate, irresistible vulnerability
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn compare the sexual relationship to a hurricane. Sex, like a hurricane, is a powerful, God-given force. While we can’t direct the path of a hurricane, quiet the gale-force winds, or suppress the rising waters, we do have control over the effects of sex in our own marriages.
- The forces of a hurricane are mostly destructive. But the power of sexual desire can be channeled to constructive, passionate and intimate relationship.
- The damage of hurricane-driven wind and water is unavoidable, but the damage of poorly planned sex is entirely preventable.
- When confronted by unexpected storms in your sex-life, use these challenges to further demonstrate your creativity and self-sacrificial love.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant - Dating Divas — https://thedatingdivas.myshopify.com?sca_ref=6278443.H6eWDeXGfx
Shop from this link and your part of your purchase will help support Intimate Covenant. Check out their Sexy Subscription Boxes!
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn respond to a listener's email from a wife who is feeling rejected because her husband, the usual sexual pursuer, has stopped initiating. We'll explore some of the reasons this might be happening and what she can do about it. Plus, we give some personal updates and exciting announcements about the future of Intimate Covenant.
- Sexual pursuers may stop for many reasons and it’s often more complicated that just hormones.
- A change in this dynamic in your relationship should never be ignored and requires an important conversation.
- The pursuer in this dynamic must be willing to respond with enthusiasm and continue to reach out to make connections wherever possible.
Use this link to get your 2024 Dating Divas Marriage Bundle: https://shop.thedatingdivas.com/discount/INTIMATE2024?redirect=%2Fproducts%2Fmarriage-bundle-2024
Kingdom Singles - Houston
For more information and to register: www.intimatecovenant.com/HOUsingles
Intimate Covenant eCourses:
www.intimatecovenant.com/courses
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss some of the latest TikTok relationship tests and whether there is something we can learn about our marriages from these viral trends.
- If you really want to test your relationship, pick up a mirror rather than a microscope. Only you can change you.
- “Turn towards” rather than “turning away” from your spouse by making and receiving bids for connection.
- Whether your prior rejections have been intentional or unintentional, challenge yourself to see and lean into those bids for connection from your spouse.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt and Jenn discuss the resurging popularity of sleeping in separate bedrooms. We'll consider the reasons why a couple might choose this option and whether it might be wise for your marriage. In addition, we'll discuss some of the consequences of spouses who have separate bedtimes.
- Every step we take away from our spouses, especially physically, has inevitable negative long-term consequences for the relationship. The decision to sleep apart should be weighed carefully and be constantly reevaluated.
- As much as is within your power, eliminate the barriers to sleeping together so that you can get be in bed with each other as often as possible.
- Likewise, separate bedtimes also promote emotional and physical drift away from each other, allowing opportunity for selfishness and betrayal.
As promised, here are the sources for the data that we referenced in this episode:
- Elsey, Taylor et al. “The role of couple sleep concordance in sleep quality: Attachment as a moderator of associations.” Journal of sleep research vol. 28,5 (2019): e12825.
- Drews HJ, Drews A. Couple Relationships Are Associated With Increased REM Sleep-A Proof-of-Concept Analysis of a Large Dataset Using Ambulatory Polysomnography. Front Psychiatry. 2021 May 10;12:641102.
- Richter, K., Adam, S., Geiss, L., Peter, L., & Niklewski, G. (2016). Two in a bed: The influence of couple sleeping and chronotypes on relationship and sleep. An overview. Chronobiology International, 33(10), 1464–1472.
- Troxel WM; Buysse DJ; Matthews KA; Kravitz HM; Bromberger JT; Sowers M; Hall MH. Marital/cohabitation status and history in relation to sleep in midlife women. SLEEP 2010;33(7):973-981.
- Chiao, Chi et al. “Loneliness in older parents: marital transitions, family and social connections, and separate bedrooms for sleep.” BMC geriatrics vol. 21,1 590. 22 Oct. 2021
- Larson JH, Crane DR, Smith CW. (1991). Morning and night couples: The effect of wake and sleep patterns on marital adjustment. J Marital Fam Ther. 17:53–65.
- Ulfberg J, Carter N, Talback M, Edling C. (2000). Adverse health effects among women living with heavy snorers. Health Care Women Int. 21:81–90.
- Gordon, A. M., & Chen, S. (2014). The Role of Sleep in Interpersonal Conflict: Do Sleepless Nights Mean Worse Fights? Social Psychological and Personality Science, 5(2), 168-175.
- Cartwright, R D, and S Knight. “Silent partners: the wives of sleep apneic patients.” Sleep vol. 10,3 (1987): 244-8.
- Cascais Costa C, Afreixo V, Cravo J. Impact of Obstructive Sleep Apnea Treatment on Marital Relationships: Sleeping Together Again? Cureus. 2023 Oct 5;15(10):e46513.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share some experiences from their recent trip to China and some life-changing lessons they are bringing back. We think these lessons will impact your marriage too!
- It’s easy to lose focus on eternal priorities and purpose. Revisit this conversation with your spouse frequently.
- Changing your circumstances will not change your marriage. To improve your marriage, you have to lean into the conflict and learn to better serve your spouse.
- We are deeply grateful for all of the amazing and beautiful people whom we have encountered in our Intimate Covenant journey — even those on the other side of the world. Thanks for sharing yourselves with us!
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share excerpts from several different live Q&A sessions recorded at previous live events.
- How do you differentiate between responsive sexual desire and a medical problem resulting in a lack of sex drive?
- How can I keep striving for spiritual and emotional intimacy when my spouse is reluctant to do so?
- How can I overcome shame in my physical appearance that hinders me from giving myself to and fully enjoying physical intimacy with my spouse?
- Is it primarily a man’s responsibility to redeem a marriage?
- Do you have suggestions to make the bedroom a special place for us?
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share some important news and updates, including a fun blooper reel.
There are multiple ways to help support Xander Moody and his family.
GiveSendGo (https://www.givesendgo.com/supportxander) - This is a crowdfunding site launched by Xander's baseball team organization.
Blessings Overflow:
- Mail checks (avoid transaction fees) with “Xander Moody” in the memo line to:
Blessings Overflow
9114 Hermitage Ln
Alvaton, KY 42122
- Venmo (https://account.venmo.com/u/BG-BlessingsOverflow): "Xander Moody" in the message.
- @BG-BlessingsOverflow
FaceBook: Xander Moody Updates https://www.facebook.com/people/Xander-Moody-Updates/61557283076688/
We would love to see you blow up their social media and their donation site. Thank you for supporting the Moodys and for remembering them before our Father’s throne in your prayers.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share segments from the live Q&A session at the Tampa Marriage Day on March 2nd, including:
- How to connect sexually, even during periods of conflict
- How to learn contentment when I desire a certain sex act, but my spouse doesn’t
- How to avoid complacency when things seem “good”
- How to navigate different preferences for sexual frequency
- How to encourage spiritual growth and accountability
Don’t miss early-bird pricing for the Annual Marriage Retreat. Save your spot and save some money with just a $200 deposit by March 15th. Space is limited.
https://www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share their responses to a few anonymous questions posed by attendees at a recent Marriage Day in Austin, TX.
- What are some ways we can help prevent our children from feeling shame about sex in marriage to stop the feeling we were raised with?
- Is it OK for me time in a successful marriage?
- How to deal with past relationships interfering with current one… as in constantly comparing oneself to another…
- If I am disinclined toward sex and my spouse feels guilty for initiating (or vice versa), what can we do to improve our time spent on sexual intimacy?
- Is it a sin when saying no to sex due to the demands of the day?
- Is it OK to "keep a secret" from your spouse?
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer a listener's question about shifting roles roles in the pursuer/responder dynamic. But first, a few important announcements:
- "Covenant Conversations" is the official name for the daily exercise formerly known as "Daily Check-in." Our thanks to Lamar Schrei for suggesting this!
- Registration for the Intimate Covenant Annual Marriage Retreat opens on Valentine's Day! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
- Plan to join us for the 7th annual Marriage Retreat in Houston, TX — September 19-21. Registration opens on Valentine’s Day.
- A shift in the roles of pursuers and responders is common in all relationships. Sometimes these role changes signal something detrimental to the relationship. Often they simply represent typical patterns of growth or seasonal shifts in the relationship.
- In a healthy relationship, labeling who is the pursuer and who is the responder is far less important than making sure that there is frequent and healthy pursuit and response in all realms of intimacy.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn respond to a listener’s question about struggling to recover from an infrequent and unhealthy sexual relationship.
- Struggles with sex in a marriage must not be ignored. Intervention and difficult conversations can save YEARS of suffering and shame; even save the marriage itself.
- The fundamental criteria for a wife to want more sex or different sex, is that the wife must have the expectation of sex worth having.
- The conflict of sexual frequency and/or sexual variety requires an ongoing conversation and a commitment from each to have as much connecting sex as necessary to promote oneness in the relationship.
ALSO, please vote on social media or by email to rename our Daily Check-In Exercise. Here's the finalists:
- Covenant Conversations
- Connection Point
- Quickie Connection
ANNOUNCING: Tampa Marriage Day, March 2
register here: https://intimatecovenant.com/tampa
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the accomplishments of 2023 and look forward to opportunities in 2024 for Intimate Covenant. We encourage you to do the same for your marriage with a State of the Covenant conversation.
- For real progress in your marriage, it’s important to critically evaluate the past and to set goals for the future.
- A thorough evaluation of your marriage should include assessment of each realm of intimacy: spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical.
- Please help support Intimate Covenant by sharing and rating the podcast. We would be especially grateful for you to join us on Patreon.
RESOURCES:
State of the Covenant - conversation guide: https://intimatecovenant.com/product/state-of-the-covenant/
State of the Covenant podcast episodes:Episode 74 — https://www.buzzsprout.com/1253489/9821679
Episode 126 — https://www.buzzsprout.com/1253489/11931486
Sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn describe, in detail, the 15-minute ritual conversation that will deepen the intimacy and connection in your marriage.
- Meaningful conversation
- Expressions of gratitude and praise
- Pray together
We referred to these conversation starter resources:
- Ultimate Intimacy Conversation Starter Cards: https://shop.ultimateintimacy.com/products/conversation-starters-card-deck
- Gottman Card Decks: https://www.gottman.com/couples/products/?fwp_couples_products=card-decks
Send us your creative name for this Daily Check-In Ritual and we'll send you FREE, EXCLUSIVE Intimate Covenant SWAG!
podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer three listener questions about passionless sex:
- "How can I stop thinking of sex as an obligation when it's physically painful? While we wait for physical healing, how can I enjoy this part of our marriage?”
- “How do you navigate pleasing your spouse when you have no sexual desire and prefer not being touched at all?”
- “How can I enjoy a particular sex act that I get a lot of pleasure from but they do not, but they are willing to do it because they love me.”
In summary,
- Refuse to let sex become passionless and simply a place of obligation — for yourself or your spouse.
- To help improve your own desire and passion, start by trying to focus on one simple thing that can anticipate and enjoy each time you make love.
- Don’t settle for passionless sex with your spouse. Seek to compassionately understand your spouse’s challenges and seek only sex that is connecting and mutually pleasurable.
Relevant previous episodes:
- Episode 76 - Does My Spouse Owe Me Sex? (1/17/2022)
- Episode 31- When Sex Is Painful (3/8/2021)
STATE OF THE COVENANT:
It's almost a New Year and a great time to think about reassessing the state of your marriage and setting some goals together to improve the strength and intimacy of your relationship. Consider our resource to help get these important conversations started: The State of the Covenant
Support these business that support Intimate Covenant:
- Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss how to handle the inevitable emotional and sexual rejections in your marriage relationship.
- Rejection almost always occurs due to multiple factors that have to do with how you are presenting the bid and with your spouse’s circumstances.
- Angry outbursts or pouting will not get you what you want - rather, these kinds of reactions prove that you are unsafe, self-centered, and undesirable.
- Instead, consider the perfect pursuer, Jesus. Even he gets rejected a majority of times. Follow his example and pursue relentlessly and selflessly.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn are sharing several segments from Q&A sessions that didn't make it into a previous episode. But, these questions are too good to leave out, so we're excited to include them here!
Here’s what we’re covering:
- How do I have sex when I’m disappointed in or upset with my spouse?
- How can we handle infertility with faith and godliness?
- Should we film ourselves having sex?
- How can I overcome body shame that is hindering my sexual enjoyment and relationship?
- How to have deeper emotionally connective conversations?
Sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimatecovenant for 20% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 20% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn are pulling from submitted questions regarding the theme of female orgasms. Specifically, how can a husband help his wife orgasm? How can a wife learn to orgasm in different ways? And how important is a wife’s orgasm, anyway?
Take-Aways:
- Husbands often place far too much emphasis on their wives orgasm and miss the far more important goal of seeking connection during sex.
- If a wife seeks to improve her ability to orgasm, a better understanding of her barriers is required. Seek to understand any possible places of sexual shame. Lean into the journey to explore your own body and sexuality.
Link to The Orgasm Course by Sheila Gregoire
(https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product/orgasm-course-bundle)
This episode is sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisors
www.opendoorfa.com
Where finances meet faith and family.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 (Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. )
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase
The Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.comUse coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.comIntimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the hymen -- facts and fiction -- as well as other misconceptions about the concept of virginity.
- There is no “virginity test.” The presence, absence, or any other physical appearance of a hymen is not a reliable indicator of a woman’s previous sexual activity. The same is true for vaginal bleeding or pain with initial sexual experience. Every women has a different experience.
- “Virginity” does not determine someone’s worth as a person or as a future spouse.
- While the ideal is that a person refrain from premarital sex, a person’s current sexual attitudes and behaviors are far more important than their past.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn reminisce over some of the highlights of this year's annual Marriage Retreat and share a segment from the live Q&A session, including:
- I'm too embarrassed to try new things. How do I get over my sexual shame?
- Sex is Messy.
- What's a reasonable sexual frequency for a male?
- How to deal with a busy and distracted spouse?
- Is sexual humor appropriate?
We also want to thank our sponsors for contributing to the success of this year's Retreat:
- J. Parker of Hot, Holy & Humorous — http://hotholyhumorous.com/
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/
- Ultimate Intimacy — https://ultimateintimacy.com/
- CoCoNu — https://coconu.com/
- Dating Divas — https://www.thedatingdivas.com/
- Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com/
Join us next year in The Woodlands, TX, September 19-21, 2024!!!
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss some of the challenges to great sex and the work required for the rewarding, lifelong journey of an intimate and fulfilling sexual relationship.
- Believing that great sex just occurs spontaneously and effortlessly is actually preventing us from achieving good sex.
- Great sex, like any other mastery, is the product of consistent, intentional work over time.
- Take responsibility for your part in growing your sexual relationship. Then, commit yourself to learning, cultivating and expanding your sex towards greater oneness.
Sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode Matt & Jenn share another live Q&A session - this time from a recent Marriage Day in Saint Louis. We respond to the following questions:
- What are some examples of a kingdom-purpose for a marriage?
What’s a good way to come up with a vision/purpose? - How to heal your sex life and trust after sexual immorality (eg porn, lust)
- How do I move past my spouses past sexual experiences with others before our marriage?
- Would you give an example of how to “reset” if we’ve become distant/feel alone/another reason?
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is honored to be sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.Derek, at Open Door, is helping Jenn and I find financial solution to build a future around our values and dreams. We personally and highly recommend Open Door to all of our listeners -- young, old, wealthy or middle class. Open Door can help guide your financial future while while keeping an eye on the eternal destination ahead.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn respond to an email from a bride-to-be regarding her concerns about first-time sexual intercourse. We also address concerns about sexual pain relevant to all married couples.
- Pain with intercourse is not a rare circumstance and may occur for many reasons. The good news is that there are solutions for nearly every cause.
- Some discomfort may occur for a new wife as her body becomes accustomed to the process of sexual intercourse.
- The keys to reducing or preventing sexual pain are lubrication and to go slow enough to achieve maximum arousal.
- If you experience pain during sex, stop immediately. Talk to your spouse about it and seek help from a health care provider.
Sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is honored to be sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.Derek, at Open Door, is helping Jenn and I find financial solution to build a future around our values and dreams. We personally and highly recommend Open Door to all of our listeners -- young, old, wealthy or middle class. Open Door can help guide your financial future while while keeping an eye on the eternal destination ahead.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share some clips from a recent live Q&A session at our Marriage Weekend in Seattle. We covered these questions:
- Explain what you mean by “newness is required in the sexual relationship"?
- How to increase romantic intimacy when life isn’t romantic?
- How often should we schedule date night?
- What are some ways we can be spontaneous with sex with kids in the house?
- What are some ways a responder can prepare for intimacy later in the day?
- Can the afterglow actually be a fore glow?
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is honored to be sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.Derek, at Open Door, is helping Jenn and I find financial solution to build a future around our values and dreams. We personally and highly recommend Open Door to all of our listeners -- young, old, wealthy or middle class. Open Door can help guide your financial future while while keeping an eye on the eternal destination ahead.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the negative impacts of pornography use -- even if it occurred before you were married. We also address the unmarried about how to deal with the challenges of finding out that your potential spouse has a porn problem.
- Pornography is a negative influence in society and may manifest terrible consequences even if a spouse used pornography before they were married.
- Prior to getting married, this issue must be addressed in conversation and counseling. Don’t get married unless you are assured that your future spouse has dealt with past bondage to pornography.
- Those of us with influence in the lives of singles, need to be a resource to help prepare them to avoid the dangers of pornography and be a resource to help young people deal with the potentially devastating consequences on their future marriages.
Previous episodes about the problems of pornography:
-
113 - Q&A from 2022
-
91 - Sex and spirituality
-
62 - 2021 Retreat Q&A
-
49 & #51 - Betrayed and Betrayer’s roles in healing
-
11 - Dealing with Pornography in your marriage
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is honored to be sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.Derek, at Open Door, is helping Jenn and I find financial solution to build a future around our values and dreams. We personally and highly recommend Open Door to all of our listeners -- young, old, wealthy or middle class. Open Door can help guide your financial future while while keeping an eye on the eternal destination ahead.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share personal advice about how to find comfort and healing in your marriage while suffering deep loss.
- Share open and honest conversations about emotions, memories, fears, and needs.
- Find solace and support in each other. Prioritize emotional, mental, spiritual and sexual connection.
- Lean on your spiritual family and don’t be afraid to seek professional help.
To purchase the 2023 DATING DIVAS MARRIAGE BUNDLE, including the brand new eCourse by Intimate Covenant, "What Does Sex Mean to My Spouse?":
https://thedatingdivas.myshopify.com/discount/INTIMATE2023?redirect=%2Fproducts%2Fmarriage-bundle-2023or the coupon code "INTIMATE2023"
(Note: the sale is not live until July 17th.)
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is honored to be sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.Derek, at Open Door, is helping Jenn and I find financial solution to build a future around our values and dreams. We personally and highly recommend Open Door to all of our listeners -- young, old, wealthy or middle class. Open Door can help guide your financial future while while keeping an eye on the eternal destination ahead.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss better ways for pursuers -- emotional or sexual -- to better communicate and initiate connection.
- Poor pursuit and poor initiation result in missed connection and feelings of rejection — intentional or unintentional.
- Pursuit should not include criticism, shame or other forms of pressure. Instead, offer an appeal for connection and an invitation to co-create.
- Be specific with your invitation to avoid miscommunications and hidden expectations.
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is honored to be sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.Derek, at Open Door, is helping Jenn and I find financial solution to build a future around our values and dreams. We personally and highly recommend Open Door to all of our listeners -- young, old, wealthy or middle class. Open Door can help guide your financial future while while keeping an eye on the eternal destination ahead.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn respond to a husband's desperate email about his wife's loss of sexual interest. Is the re anything he can do about it?
- A wife’s sex drive is negatively impacted by many obstacles and challenges. As a husband, don’t be another reason your wife doesn’t want to have sex!
- Prioritize the whole relationship and the sex will almost certainly improve. Sex is best when you both feel valued, appreciated and pursued.
- Nourish and cherish your wife. Anything you can do to reduce your wife’s stress load can allow more space for her to stoke her sexual spark of desire
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.com
"Where finances meet faith and family."
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is honored to be sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.Derek, at Open Door, is helping Jenn and I find financial solution to build a future around our values and dreams. We personally and highly recommend Open Door to all of our listeners -- young, old, wealthy or middle class. Open Door can help guide your financial future while while keeping an eye on the eternal destination ahead.
Sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.
------------------------------------------------
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share several segments from previous live Q&A sessions which we haven't included in an episode before. These leftovers won't be stale! Here's what we cover:
- Do you have any specific tips to train yourself to stop defaulting to "logistic" conversations and encourage more emotionally connective conversations?
- How can you differentiate between "withdrawal" and an actual medical lack of sex drive?
- How can I overcome shame in my physical appearance that hinders me from fully giving myself to and and enjoying physical intimacy with my spouse?
- What can I do to keep striving towards spiritual and emotional intimacy when my husband is not interested in implementing practical ways to do so?
- What are the limits of appropriate conversations about sex and intimacy with other Christian friends?
- What are some ways of connecting during the day with my spouse? Because of our jobs, we rarely ever wake up or go to bed at the same time.
- Have you found that with pursuer/responder, couples can sometimes be both at different times?
- When healing from sexual trauma within the relationship, would boundaries help or harm the healing process?
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is honored to be sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.Derek, at Open Door, is helping Jenn and I find financial solution to build a future around our values and dreams. We personally and highly recommend Open Door to all of our listeners -- young, old, wealthy or middle class. Open Door can help guide your financial future while while keeping an eye on the eternal destination ahead.
Sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.-----------------------------------------------
In this episode, Matt & Jenn respond to listener feedback about the impacts of sexual shame on the marriage relationship.
- sexual shame results in sexual relationships that are disconnected & withdrawn.
- Sexual pursuers and responders tend to be impacted by sexual shame differently. Pursuers often bear unnecessary guilt for having sexual desire. Responders have learned to resist sexual thought or activity.
- Intimate relationship is the ultimate antidote for shame. Co-create new meaning for sex with your Beloved.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is honored to be sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.Derek, at Open Door, is helping Jenn and I find financial solution to build a future around our values and dreams. We personally and highly recommend Open Door to all of our listeners -- young, old, wealthy or middle class. Open Door can help guide your financial future while while keeping an eye on the eternal destination ahead.
Sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.-----------------------------------------------
In this episode, Matt & Jenn respond to two listener emails about one-sided sex and asking your spouse for orgasm.
- The purpose of sexual desire is to point us toward intimate connection with God and with each other. When we fail to see the spiritual significance of sex, we miss the opportunity for fullness of pleasure and intimacy.
- Present circumstances may limit how my sexual availability is manifested; but I must always offer the fulness of what I have to give — physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally.
- Conversations about sexual expectations can help avoid disappointment and resentment.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is honored to be sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.Derek, at Open Door, is helping Jenn and I find financial solution to build a future around our values and dreams. We personally and highly recommend Open Door to all of our listeners -- young, old, wealthy or middle class. Open Door can help guide your financial future while while keeping an eye on the eternal destination ahead.
Sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisors -- www.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the biblical principles that should govern the use of sex toys in the holy marriage bed.
- The Bible does not specifically address the use of sex toys in the marriage bed. But, even without a specific prohibition, careful consideration and wisdom are indicated.
- Sex toys can be useful for couples to inject an occasional element of novelty and "spice" into their sexual routines.
- Couples who suffer from sexual challenges or dysfunctions may use sex toys as an aid to help bring sexual pleasure and connection back into their relationship.
- However, there is great danger for the relationship if a couple (or individual spouse) is using sex toys as a substitution for intimacy or a short-cut to avoid physical or emotional arousal.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is honored to be sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.Derek, at Open Door, is helping Jenn and I find financial solution to build a future around our values and dreams. We personally and highly recommend Open Door to all of our listeners -- young, old, wealthy or middle class. Open Door can help guide your financial future while while keeping an eye on the eternal destination ahead.
Sponsored by: Open Door Financial Advisors
www.opendoorfa.com
In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer questions posed at the 2023 Nashville Marriage Day. We had a lovely time with this group and they asked some great questions, including:
- Do you have advice on communicating when needs aren't being met without coming across as selfish or making my spouse feel like a failure?
- In an effort to spice things up, is there anything a Christian couple should steer away from to protect your minds and your intimacy?
- How do you continue being vulnerable if your spouse repeatedly gets defensive, shuts down, shifts blame, or doesn't change when you try?
- What does praying together look like?
- How do you recommend injecting sexual tension throughout the day?
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is honored to be sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.Derek, at Open Door, is helping Jenn and I find financial solution to build a future around our values and dreams. We personally and highly recommend Open Door to all of our listeners -- young, old, wealthy or middle class. Open Door can help guide your financial future while while keeping an eye on the eternal destination ahead.
Sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn chat with Justin Gerhardt, creator of the Holy Ghost Stories Podcast AND our special guest performer at the Intimate Covenant Annual Marriage Retreat. Justin will be performing a live storytelling for our limited audience. This year, the Retreat is September 21-23 in The Woodlands, TX. Space is limited and we are already filling up fast. Details and registration here:
www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
If you are not already subscribed to the Holy Ghost Stories podcast, DO IT! Your vision of the Old Testament and of Yahweh, Himself, will be transformed by Justin's textually accurate and deeply evocative storytelling.
www.holyghoststories.org
Our deep thanks to Justin, for this incredible conversation. We're delighted to share it with you!
Join us on Patreon to see the full length video recording of this conversation!
www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is honored to be sponsored by:
Open Door Financial Advisorswww.opendoorfa.comWhere finances meet faith and family.Derek, at Open Door, is helping Jenn and I find financial solution to build a future around our values and dreams. We personally and highly recommend Open Door to all of our listeners -- young, old, wealthy or middle class. Open Door can help guide your financial future while while keeping an eye on the eternal destination ahead.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer some of the questions from the Tampa Marriage Day 2023.
- Name the three greatest examples of marriage in the Bible.
- How to have a conversation with your spouse about something they think is “dirty”?
- What if I feel that I’ve married the wrong person?
- What does it look like to see my spouse as the image of God and hold them in awe?
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode Matt and Jenn respond to two listener questions regarding expectations about orgasm:
- My husband’s efficient/impatient personality prevents me from mentally and physically “getting there” for fear I’m taking too long. How do we strive for better?
- It feels like my husband only feels satisfied with our sex if I orgasm… but sometimes I don’t feel like orgasming but still want to please him… thoughts?
How are these questions the same? What do these questions tell us about misconceptions we might have in our own sex lives regarding orgasm.
- Each spouse is responsible to address the sexual desires and needs of the other - without selfishness, resentment, or apathy.
- That said, orgasm is not the only, or even the most important, indicator of sexual success.
- Rather, connection and mutual pleasure should be the focus of your sex.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn reveal the guest performer for the Annual Marriage Retreat in September. Also, we'll share about our personal struggles in balancing this ministry and some restructuring of our vision for Intimate Covenant as we move forward into new opportunities.
- Look for the next intimate Covenant episode in TWO weeks, and every 2 weeks going forward.
- The Intimate Covenant Marriage Retreat is September 21-23. Registration opens on February 14th.
- This year, the Marriage Retreat will feature a special guest performance by Justin Gerhardt, of the Holy Ghost Stories podcast. You will not want to miss this special weekend.
Register for the Annual Marriage Retreat here: www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
For more about Justin Gerhardt and the Holy Ghost Stories podcast: www.holyghoststories.org
We can't recommend this podcast highly enough! We think your whole family will love it!
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Or, consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share a recording from the Q&A session at a recent Marriage Day event in Dallas, TX. Some challenging questions that we discussed are:
- How often should a couple have sex?
- How can we still have great sex with a house full of kids?
- What if we are both sexual responders?
- How can learn to stop pouting when I get rejected?
- What can be done about ED and other sexual dysfunction?
- What are common insecurities that wives face?
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn are joined by Christian sex blogger and author (and friend), J. Parker of Hot, Holy & Humorous, to discuss the non-typical dynamic when the wife is the sexual pursuer.
- While not the majority, relationships where the wife has the higher sexual desire is certainly more common than many would think.
- Most of the time, this dynamic does not indicate physical, emotional, or spiritual problems in the relationship— it is simply a result of individual variability and circumstances.
- Thankfully, more people are now willing to talk about this dynamic more openly, including our friend J Parker of Hot, Holy & Humorous.
For more from J. Parker, check out her website: https://hotholyhumorous.com/
We can recommend, without hesitation, her blog, her podcasts, and her books to ALL married couples.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn compare all of the different birth control options -- how they work, their advantages and disadvantages.
- The decision whether to use birth control should be carefully considered after you’ve considered whether your motivations stem from a sense of responsible use of God’s blessings in your life or whether you are being motivated by selfish and materialistic desires.
- The specific methodology of birth control that you use should be chosen based on important criteria including: mode of action, convenience, efficacy, risks, compatibility, and reversibility.
- Many options are available and couples should reconsider this conversation frequently to determine what method is best for their current circumstances.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn encourage couples to make intentional and biblically informed decisions about birth control.
- The conversation about birth control must start by rejecting society’s notion that children are a negative to my personal life and to society. Rather, we must view children as God sees them — a sacred blessing and holy responsibility.
- That said, responsible management of childbearing does not seem to be defiant of God’s command to “be fruitful and multiply” so long as the Christian faithfully accepts God’s will and His grace in any outcome.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share their method of critically assessing the state of their own marital intimacy and some tips on how to have the conversation about setting goals for better connection.
- For real progress in your marriage, it’s important to critically evaluate the past and to set goals for the future.
- A thorough evaluation of your marriage should include assessment of each realm of intimacy: spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical.
- In setting relationship goals, I need to define what I am going to change individually with specific and realistic plan.
We took our own “State of the Covenant” conversation and created a detailed form with conversation starters and a step-by-step breakdown of the process that we use to regularly assess our relationship status and to set intimacy-building goals. We've organized our conversation and the form around the four realms intimacy: spiritual, mental, emotional and physical.
- Free for Patreon subscribers. Join us at Patreon to support our mission to spread God's message for intimate marriage and holy sexuality. For as little as $5/month, your contribution will help offset the material costs of producing this podcast and fund upcoming new projects. Your subscription will give you access to our monthly newsletter and other exclusive resources, including the State of the Covenant form.
- You can also find the form in our store on the website: https://intimatecovenant.com/product/state-of-the-covenant/
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn consider the question, "What do I want from my marriage?" Is there a better question as we consider New Year's resolutions for our marriages?
- Mature past the selfish motivations of relationship and begin to see the true fulfillment of covenant love built on self-sacrifice — in your marriage and in your relationship to God.
- For this new year (and everyday), ask the questions, “What do I want FOR my marriage?” “What more can I give TO this covenant?”
- Begin the assessment of your relationship with humility and self-reflection. Then, have a conversation with your spouse to determine what you can do for them and for your marriage.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn suggest some meaningful wedding gift ideas that may not be on the engaged couple's registry.
- Rather than an arbitrary choice from the wedding registry, consider a more thoughtful and relationship-focused wedding gift for the newlyweds in your life.
- Providing resources for date nights or getaways is a great way to invest in a young couple.
- Professional counseling or coaching can be an incredibly impactful gift to help provide relationship and communication tools for a healthy and vibrant marriage that will far outlast the toaster oven they registered for.
Great Books for Married Couples:
- Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas
- Cherish by Gary Thomas
- Hot, Holy and Humorous by J. Parker
- The Good Girl’s/Guy’s Guide to Great Sex by Sheila & Keith Gregoire
- Married Sex by Gary Thomas & Debra Fileta
Date Night Gifts:
- The Adventure Challenge Books — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase. - Ultimate Intimacy Conversation Starters Card Deck: https://shop.ultimateintimacy.com/products/conversation-starters-card-deck
- Gottman Card Decks: https://www.gottman.com/couples/products/?fwp_couples_products=card-decks
To arrange premarital or newlywed couple coaching, contact us: feedback@intimatecovenant.comPlease support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn offer advice and tips for planning a a special and intimate honeymoon experience. We're continuing our series aimed at not-yet-married couples. Share this episode with engaged couples that you know to help them avoid common pitfalls that lead to honeymoon disappointment.
- When planning your honeymoon, be mindful of the purpose of your honeymoon — i.e. to begin to explore your new sexual relationship and build a foundation for intimate connection.
- Prior to the wedding night, you should have conversation with your spouse-to-be about your expectations for the wedding night. Be sure that you have given consideration in planning your wedding day to ensure that your wedding night will also be special and meaningful.
- Be intentional and realistic about your sexual expectations for the first night and for your honeymoon. While the honeymoon does not have to include the most mind-blowing sex you will ever have, it is an important time to begin building a healthy and intimate sex life for your new marriage.
Great resources for building healthy and godly sexual knowledge, including practical honeymoon advice:
- Hot, Holy and Humorous by J. Parker
- The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex by Sheila & Keith Gregoire
- The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex by Sheila Gregoire
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn offer advice to couples who are not yet married, and to those of us who should be mentoring these premarital couples.
- Choosing your spouse is one of the most important and consequential decisions one will make. The way that we are dating will play an important part of getting this right.
- Premarital counseling, before and after engagement, is a crucially important investment in your future relationship.
- To best assess a potential spouse you need to be aware of their character weaknesses, history of trauma, sexual history, family-of-origin dynamics, and financial situation.
We highly recommend these books for those who are of dating age:
- Not Yet Married by Marshall Segel
- Sacred Search by Gary Thomas
This book is a must read for engaged couples and those who may be counseling/mentoring these couples:
- Nine Essential Conversations Before You Say I Do by Gary Thomas
These books are helpful for preparing young people for the sexual relationship. These are also great resources for anyone who wants to improve their understanding of sex and sexual desire.
- The Good Girl’s Guide to Great Sex by Sheila Gregoire
- The Good Guy’s Guide to Great Sex by Sheila & Keith Gregoire
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn offer advice about giving and receiving sexy gifts.
- Consider starting a sexy Christmas tradition. This is a great time to gift your sexual relationship by exchanging sexy presents and/or by making time for a Christmas Eve quickie.
- If you are a sexual pursuer, be sure that you are primarily considering what is best for encouraging sexual connection for your spouse.
- Sexual responders should consider how to get in the Christmas spirit by giving their beloved a generous sexual gift.
- Primarily, this season should be an opportunity to find connection amid the chaos. Seek each other first.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this encore episode, Matt & Jenn discuss how to keep your relationship and your sex life from freezing over during the busy holiday season.
- Protect your spouse. Make sure they know that you’ve got their back. Approach your extended families with an “us vs. them” mentality.
- Prioritize your spouse and your relationship. You absolutely MUST make time to continue to connect with your spouse, even at the expense of making others happy - even your kids.
- Plan ahead so that you are prepared to overcome challenges to your sex life during this holiday season.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss how the sexual relationship can sometimes be a pathway to help smooth and heal emotional or spiritual conflicts.
- Rather than seeing your relational conflicts as a barrier to your sex life, consider that investing in your sexual relationship can be an important tool to build and strengthen your whole marriage.
- Recognize the power of the sexual pathway to connection. A meaningful sexual connection can open up emotional and spiritual channels of connection for the sexual pursuer and responder.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss characteristics of your sexual relationship that may be pointing to some deeper and broader issues in your marriage.
- Your sexual relationship doesn’t happen in a bubble. It is a reflection of the whole of your relationship and is affected by the quality of your spiritual, emotional and physical intimacy.
- If there are signs of an unhealthy sexual relationship in your marriage, stop ignoring them and find someone to help.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn challenge the mind set of "foreplay." Is there a better way to think about the process of building sexual arousal?
- The concept of “foreplay” may be counterproductive to a godly and healthy view of sexuality since this idea limits a definition of sex to just intercourse and promotes the goal of sex as orgasm.
- Instead, consider embracing the idea of “simmering” — a general tone of frequent acknowledgment and engagement of sexual arousal, desire, and play.
- Embrace a non-linear, non-goal-oriented view of sex.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Keep Striving & Don't Settle!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn continue the conversation about oral sex -- tips and techniques to help make oral sex more comfortable and pleasurable for the giver and the receiver.
- There are plenty of ways to help make oral sex more pleasant and more pleasurable, especially for the hesitant spouse.
- For the giver or receiver, be creative, offer feedback and be curious about each other’s desires and needs.
- Whether this is something you’ve never tried or something you do every Tuesday, oral sex is a topic that deserves plenty of conversation in your marriage.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Coupon Code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss moral, emotional and physical aversions to oral sex. How does a hesitant giver or receiver confront your blocks?
- Oral sex is as biblically acceptable as any other means of sexual intimacy.
- Whether or not you incorporate oral sex into your marriage bed is ultimately up to you and your spouse. But, we hope we can encourage you to find as many ways as possible to share sexual pleasure in your marriage bed.
- Consider any physical, emotional, or spiritual blocks you may have and if these blocks are helping or hurting your marriage relationship
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the never-ending conflict of “I want one thing, but my spouse wants something entirely different.” How do I convince my spouse to see it my way?
- We need to stop asking the question, “How do I get my spouse to do …?” Instead, if we want to love like Christ, we need to be asking, “What does my spouse need me to do?”
- When exploring why my spouse is uninterested or unwilling to meet my desires, first I must seek to understand their good reasons for wanting what they want (or don’t want)
- Stop seeing the problem as something that your spouse needs to change and determine what I can do right now to start growing myself to be a better person and to offer something that is worth following.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
- Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. - Coconu — http://www.coconu.com
Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase - Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.com
Use coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share the rest of the Q&A session from this year's Retreat, including J. Parker of Hot, Holy & Humorous. We covered questions about:
- How to be there for a spouse dealing with past trauma, especially when it comes to emotional/conflict conversations.
- I struggle with porn. My wife is aware of my struggle, but I don't always tell her when I slip up. I do this out of a desire to spare from pain. Is this wrong?
- What sex toys or positions would you recommend?
Once again, we want to express our deep appreciation to our sponsors for this year's annual Marriage Retreat. Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant.
- Married Dance - tastefully curated assortment of products for married couples, presented in a nudity-free marriage focused environment. Shopping from this link helps support Intimate Covenant:https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29
- The Adventure Challenge books — Spice up your relationship with exciting scratch-off challenges and prompts. Books for date nights and in the bedroom. (Also family and friend books). Use affiliate coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your next order and help support Intimate Covenant
- CocoNu — lubricants made from clean and natural ingredients, including organic coconut oils and coconut water. Use affiliate coupon code: intimatecovenant for 15% off your next order and help support Intimate Covenant.
- The Dating Divas — strengthening marriages one date at a time. Check out their website for a TON of great resources.
- Ultimate Intimacy — an app and other products designed to strengthen and enhance your intimacy. We especially recommend their conversation starter card deck - it’s great for date night.
- UberLube — a high quality, luxurious silicone lubricant that is smooth and silky, never sticky.
- Get Your Marriage On! — an app, Intimately Us, and other products including Sheets & Ladders, a customizable sexy foreplay game.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer questions from a live audience at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat! We are joined by Julie Parker of Hot, Holy & Humorousand her husband, Jay, for a round table of fun and insightful responses.
- How do women have multiple orgasms? I have friends that are capable to do so easily, even in unhealthy marriages. Is it a physical or mental ability?
- Scheduled sex sounds like a great idea. What are suggestions for making it happen? How do you keep it from becoming “routine” or just another “to do” list item?
- In addition to praying together, what other ways do you suggest fostering spiritual intimacy?
- What are your thoughts on discreet sex in public? Sinful, irreverent?
- Are “bad words” in the bedroom wrong? Sometimes they just come out and I never use them any other scenario. It only happens when things are hot and heavy.
...Next week we'll share several more questions and answers from this incredibly fun session!
Join us at the Intimate Covenant Annual Marriage Retreat each Fallin Houston, TX.
www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt and Jenn revisit a previous episode about sexual desire differences.
- In general, a man’s sexual desire is like a microwave (spontaneous) and a woman’s sexual desire is like a crockpot (responsive). Neither is right or wrong and neither is better or worse.
- Empathize with your spouse’s position by offering grace, mercy, and understanding. Learn to embrace your own desire with contentment and enthusiasm.
- Each of you have a role to play in building a solid relationship and creating circumstances where eroticism and sexual passion can flourish.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the benefits of heightening our five senses to enhance our sexual experience -- including practical tips!
- We often limit the potential of our sexual experience and pleasure by narrowly focusing our sensations.
- I can focus my body and mind to be more present in the sexual experience by concentrating on the five senses.
- By heightening or taking away sensations, I can deepen the connection to my spouse, intensify my pleasure, and help accentuate my access to arousal in my daily life.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share some eye-opening observations after spending some time with a group of unmarried Christians talking about the the unique challenges that they face in their pursuit of holiness. Here's what we learned from them:
- Unmarried Christians are vulnerable to struggles with sexual temptation and loneliness. I need to do a better job of helping singles find a place of belonging and support within my home and the church.
- Most single Christians do not have trusted mentors when it comes to understanding and living out their sexuality. I need to be a louder voice and safer place for God’s plan for sexuality, dating and marriage in the Kingdom. If young people aren’t asking me for advice, I should consider why not.
- Pornography is rampant in the church (not just among young people, not just among men). Most people do not know how to quit or where to even start. Church, do better. I need to be a stronger advocate for dealing with this destructive issue in my community.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share a recorded portion from the Q&A session at the Marriage Day in Bowling Green, KY on August 27. We covered topics like:
- Surviving Kids
- Scheduling Sex, #trashnight
- Afterglow
- Lost attraction
- Challenges of aging, childbirth, and other hormone changes
- Inviting pursuit after long-term rejection
To purchase the full video series AWAKEN!-- exploring love and romance in the Song of Songshttps://intimatecovenant.com/product/awaken-video-series-exploring-love-romance-in-the-song-of-songs/
Topics include:
- Creating emotional connection through conversation
- Navigating the dance of sexual pursuit and rejection
- Harnessing the power of sexual fantasy
- Removing barriers to intimacy
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss how to shift your mindset toward healthy growth in your marriage.
- My attitude towards the challenges, conflicts, and obstacles in my relationship will determine the depth of fulfillment and connection that I can attain in my marriage.
- A fixed mindset limits my potential by focusing on fear, shame, and pride.
- A growth mindset pursues a deeper relationship by embracing vulnerability, curiosity, and the fulness of love.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn offer advice about how to use quickie sex to improve your sexual relationship.
- Not every sexual experience has to require the same level of energy and preparation. Define the types of sex that you are having in your marriage.
- A quickie is a great way to maintain sexual connection even when you or your spouse don’t have the time and energy for something more extraordinary.
- The best quickie sex happens when each of you has communicated realistic expectations and when you are using sex to build connection rather than just release or obligation.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn talk about the importance of direct and vulnerable communication for sexual pursuers.
- Sexual pursuers often struggle to be direct enough to express their sexual desires and expectations in a way that is clearly understood, but not pressuring.
- Sexual responders may find it difficult to lean into uncomfortable conversations.
- The most intimate and mutually pleasurable sex life requires constant conversation because sex is not just about what you do with your bodies. Intimate sex requires building relationship.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer an email from a wife questioning whether she should be "dressing up" in a provocative way for her husband.
- The suggestion from a sexual pursuer to dress in provocative way often meets resistance from a sexual responder. But, the conflict is often much deeper than just style or fashion differences.
- A sexual responder must be willing to confront the source of her aversion and be honest whether her reasons are helping or hurting the marriage.
- The sexual pursuer must be willing to confront his motivations for emphasizing his wife’s body. Is he celebrating or objectifying her?
Today, August 1st, is the LAST DAY to take advantage of the incredible savings on the 2022 Marriage Bundle -- 20 amazing marriage resources for just $20 (a $400 value)
Head here for details: https://www.intimatecovenant.com/marriage-bundle
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share some thoughts about what it means to celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary. We hope you are encouraged and inspired by this conversation.
Some things you should be aware of:
Dating Divas Marriage Bundle 2022 -- For more information and to get our unique discount: www.intimatecovenant.com/marriage-bundle
Balancing the Christian Life Digital Lecture Series: On Saturday, July 30, Matt & Jenn are speaking on the topic, "Serving My Spouse." For a listing of the schedule and speakers and to purchase access, visit: https://www.balancingthechristianlife.com
Get a discount at checkout if you use the code: intimate
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn encourage a more careful and biblical approach to how we teach our girls about "modesty" and how to dress.
- For centuries, women have been taught that they must diligently cover their bodies in order to prevent men from sinning. But is this idea even found in Scripture? Is this the message of “modesty” passages?
- Teaching women to shamefully cover themselves from the motivations of fear or humiliation, results in further objectification of their bodies.
- Instead, let’s teach women to adorn themselves in a way that respects themselves and others by proclaiming the beauty and proper display of femininity.
Dating Divas Marriage Bundle 2022:https://thedatingdivas.myshopify.com/discount/INTIMATE2022?redirect=%2Fproducts%2Fmarriage-bundle-2022
Use this link for special savings on an incredible bundle of marriage resources, including a video recording from Intimate Covenant.
Balancing the Christian Life Digital Lectureship: Don't miss our lecture on July 30 "Serving My Spouse"
For more information and to register: www.balancingthechristianlife.com
For 25% off, use the coupon code: covenantJoin us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the popular advice that Christian men ought to "bounce their eyes" to avoid lusting after women.
- A popular method of dealing with the problem of lust is to teach men to “bounce their eyes” and avoid any possible exposure to sexual stimuli. But is this helpful advice, or even scriptural?
- Rather than avoiding women or suggesting that their bodies are dangerous threats, it is much more loving to see women as Jesus saw them — as souls made in the glorious image of God.
- As a parent, you should teach your sons to have the expectation that they don’t have to be triggered toward lust by every exposure to feminine beauty. But this is an intentional work requiring meditation, prayer and building relationships.
Catch Matt & Jenn on the Balancing the Christian Life Digital Lectureship.For more information and to register: balancingthechristianlife.com
To save 25 % off registrations use coupon code: covenant
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this milestone episode (number 100!!!), Matt & Jenn discuss how to maintain a vibrant and growing sex life even into old age. We're sharing opinions, perspectives, and advice from some older couples whom we respect, admire, and love.
- You should absolutely expect that you can have a vibrant and growing sexual relationship for as long as you are alive and married.
- When we dismiss our own, or our spouse’s, sexuality due to age, or chronic health struggles, we are robbing our relationship of something that inherently defines marriage as God designed it.
- Certainly we will all face the challenges of aging. But with preparation and intentionality, your marriage and sex life can continue to grow for as long as you're married.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive livestreams, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt and Jenn discuss how to add prayer to your sex life.
- Both prayer and sex can feel awkward because, if done right, each require vulnerability.
- But prayer is a powerful way to build intimacy and, therefore, passion in your marriage and your marriage bed.
- Consider adding regular prayer for your sexual relationship and during your sex for deeper spiritual and sexual connection.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss below-the-belt grooming and hygiene -- pros, cons and reasons why you (or your spouse) might want to do it.
- Genital grooming and hygiene can be a sensitive topic of conversation because it may trigger feelings of deep shame or rejection.
- There are many benefits of genital grooming and hygiene including improved experiences giving and receiving sex. However, there are some important logistical considerations and other downsides.
- Whatever the topic of conversation, lean into the awkwardness so that you can learn more about your spouse and their desires, wants and wishes.
Also, check out our recent conversation on the Marriage Puzzle Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/marriage-puzzle/id1575020403
Prayers for Thomas and Juli Holder after the premature birth of their baby -- 1 day after our interview with Thomas.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the challenges when your spouse is OK with being just OK. We describe our personal journey toward growing together and some principles to guide your breakthrough toward deeper intimacy.
- Every marriage has gridlock issues where one spouse is quite content to maintain status quo and the other spouse desires growth and novelty.
- Fear is the fundamental reason that responders resist growth. To confront this fear, turn from dwelling on your fears and start to focus on reasons for hope.
- Pursuers, stop focusing on what is missing in your marriage and start focusing on your part in creating the dynamic that exists. If you want change, then change yourself.
Extended content and an unedited video recording of this episode is available on Covenant Club: intimatecovenant.com/members
Bowling Green Marriage Day 2022: If you are in the area, we'd love to meet you! Register now, intimatecovenant.com/bg2022
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn offer advice and encouragement for sexual responders to learn to initiate sex sometimes.
- It can be a daunting proposition for a sexual responder to initiate a sexual gift for their pursuer spouse. Their anxiety can come from a number of places including a fear of their own sexuality, fear of their spouse’s sexuality, or a general fear of being inadequate.
- As a sexual responder, initiating a sexual gift for your pursuer spouse will likely look different than when the pursuer is initiating.
- That said, offering a sexual gift to a pursuer can be extremely meaningful and intimate, with tremendous benefit to the relationship.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt and Jenn offer advice to a listener about talking to children about the awkward topic of masturbation.
- Understandably, as parents, it is confusing and challenging for us to know how to guide our kids when it comes to teaching them about their sexuality and, specifically, about masturbation.
- To be clear, the Bible does not speak specifically about solo masturbation so, this is not a simple “yes” or “no.” conversation with our kids. Therefore, it is most important to teach about the principles that might guide thoughts and behaviors related to masturbation, such as sexual lust.
- We must teach our children to understand their sexuality through a holy lens and equip them with tools to productively channel their sexual energy, desires, and curiosities.
Also in this episode, we referenced some books to help prepare kids for the inevitable exposure to pornography:
- Good Pictures Bad Pictures: Porn-Proofing Today's Young Kids
by Kristen A. Jenson (Author), Debbie Fox (Illustrator) - Good Pictures Bad Pictures Jr.: A Simple Plan to Protect Young Mindsby Kristen A. Jenson (Author) & Debbie Fox (Illustrator)
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt and Jenn offer advice to a wife (and the rest of us) who is suffering from performance anxiety in the bedroom and having a hard time letting go of her embarrassment and awkwardness.
- Private, selfish masturbation habits, even those that started before marriage, will have a negative impact on your married sex life. It might be time for you to acknowledge and confront those behaviors.
- Sex requires vulnerability. The fear sharing all of ourselves can be overwhelming and can definitely stifle our depth of sexual intimacy and pleasure.
- To help alleviate this anxiety, start small. Learn to talk more deeply and intimately about sex. Learn to more fully share yourself in and out of the bedroom. Engage in practices that gradually allow you to become more and more comfortable with your self and with each other.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt and Jenn consider a question from a husband whose wife desires more "non-sexual touch." What's the difference between sexual and non-sexual touch? Is there a difference between sexual and non-sexual touch? Why might this wife be asking for this?
- When considering conflict in your relationship, understand that there are always two layers: the first layer is the point of conflict, the deeper layer is the relationship dynamic that is driving the conflict. Each layer must be examined and addressed with humility and ownership.
- The difference in sexual and non-sexual touch is not about where you touch, it is in the motivation, expectations and perceived pressure associated with the touching.
- Ultimately, all touch should be leading to deeper intimacy and connection in each realm of our relationship — emotionally, mentally, spiritually and sexually.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share a live Q&A session from our recent seminar in Tampa, FL. We covered questions like:
- Is masturbation OK?
- How do I handle when I get distracted or lose my momentum during sex?
- How do we compromise if my spouse doesn't want to do a specific sexual activity?
- Dealing with lack of sexual performance
- What if intercourse if painful?
- How do we share sexual history and sin?
- Are there good resources to help us talk to our kids about sex?
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
- Our next live, interactive webinar is Thursday, May 19 @ 8:00PM (CST)
- "Marriage Advice - good, bad and ugly"
- Subscribe for access to the webinar and much more!
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer a handful of mailbag questions about sex and spirituality.
- You can change the culture of fear and shame surrounding sex in your own corner of God’s Kingdom. Start by reshaping your understanding of your own sexuality through the lens of God’s word. Then, use your influence in your community to spread God’s word about holy sexuality and intimate marriage.
- Consider the benefit of sexual fasting as detailed in 1 Corinthians 7:5 and how to use this spiritual tool to benefit your marriage
- Pornography and sexual abuse are two vastly ignored cancers among the church. Local congregations need training, resources and programs to help those recovering from pornography, abuse and betrayal.
For a double feature this week, catch our interview with Nikki and Ben on the Nikki Lee Podcast! We had a great time and some meaningful conversation! We think you'll enjoy it.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer listener questions about some of the nuances of the sexual pursuer/responder dynamic.
- In all marriages there is a sexual pursuer and a sexual responder. But these roles are not static. In various circumstances and seasons these roles may change in your relationship
- One example is when a pusher is constantly rejected. It is common for this pursuer to stop pursuing and to withdraw emotionally and sexually.
- Stereotypically, husbands are usually sexual pursuers, but there is a [not small] minority of wives who are the sexual pursuers in their marriages. There may be many reasons for this, but it does create some unique challenges.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the power of sexual fantasy and how to harness this magic for more powerful sex and deeper connection.
- Fantasy is a story you tell yourself to tap into emotional and sexual arousal. It’s how you choose to be present in your sexual relationship. It’s how you awaken your body to seek and to receive connection.
- Effective fantasy is dwelling on whatever heightens your sexual awareness and then mindfully bringing your spouse into that. Simmering means intentionally dwelling on fantasy outside the bedroom to heighten your overall level of attraction and desire. Erotic fantasy is focusing your thoughts to keep your mind and body connected during sex which help maximize your connection and pleasure.
- Fantasy can be either a bridge or a wall to sexual connection. It’s a wall when our sexual thoughts cause us to dissociate from our spouse. Fantasy is a bridge when our sexual thoughts promote deeper closeness in our relationship.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt and Jenn discuss factors and tips to improve the sensation, the strength, and the frequency of orgasm -- especially for wives.
- Orgasm, while not the goal of sex, is an intensely pleasurable point of connection and may be elusive for some, especially wives.
- Changing the sensation or strengthening the intensity of orgasm can add novelty and improve sexual pleasure for one or both spouses.
- A number of factors may make orgasm difficult for women but relational strife and emotional stress are the most important negative influences.
Listen to our interview with Keelie Reason and her husband, Austin, on the Love, Hope, Adventure Podcast! https://lovehopeadventure.com/building-sexual-connection We really enjoyed this conversation about building sexual connection in marriage. We also recommend checking out her blog and wealth of other resources on her website.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today!
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including a wives-only section), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn help us understand the details of orgasm -- including gender physiology differences, health and relational benefits, spiritual parallels and the overall purpose for orgasm.
- Orgasm, while not the goal of sex, is an intensely pleasurable point of connection with a multitude of relational, emotional, and physical health benefits.
- There are a number of ways to change the sensation or to strengthen the feelings of orgasm.
- Ultimately, each person experiences orgasm differently due to their gender and to individual characteristics. Communication is required to maximize each other’s experience.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today!
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including a wives-only section), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the the "orgasm gap." What is the orgasm gap? Does it exist in your marriage? Is the orgasm gap a problem?
- The “orgasm gap” refers to the fact that men tend to orgasm with sex at much higher frequency than women.
- The significance of the orgasm gap in your marriage depends on many factors and may or may not be problem for your relationship.
- If either of you is unsatisfied with the orgasm gap in your marriage, you need to have conversation about the significance of sexual pleasure and degree of connection in your relationship.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today!
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including wives-only and husbands-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share recorded excerpts from the live Q&A session at our recent Louisville, KY seminar (shout out to all of our new friends!!!) We covered topics such as:
- I have unwanted sexual thoughts and memories when I try to orgasm? What do I do with these fantasies?
- My bids for connection are unnoticed and ignored. How can I get my spouse to acknowledge my needs for emotional/sexual connection?
- My spouse and I have different Love Languages. Can we still learn to connect?
- How do I talk to my kids about sex without encouraging them to experiment?
- As a husband, how can I help my wife’s body image insecurity?
- How do you pray during intimacy?
To send your OWN comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt and Jenn discuss anal sex in marriage -- is it biblical? what are the benefits? risks? and motivations?
- The bible does not specifically promote nor prohibit anal sex or anal play by a married couple.
- Anal play, including prostate massage, may be enjoyable for some. While some do, most women do not enjoy anal intercourse which carries significant risk.
- As with any sexual novelty, carefully consider your motivation and whether this activity will promote oneness.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including a wives-only section), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn look at a few more myths that were encouraged by the Purity Culture Movement which still persist in many conservative religious circles. For example:
- “If I save myself for marriage, my sex life will be amazing.”
- “If I marry a Christian, my marriage will be happy.”
- “Marriage is the solution to your sex problem (lust, porn) and your loneliness problem.”
- “Men’s minds are evil. Women’s bodies are evil.”
- “Women are responsible for a man’s sexual feelings, thoughts and actions.”
- Sexual purity means that your whole being is filled and directed by one thing: God. Your motives, desires, purpose, and intentions are not stained by any other influences. Sexual purity is not merely about what we are doing or not doing with our genitals!
- It is dangerous theology when we come to believe and teach that sex is evil, men can’t control sexual urges, women’s bodies are inherently a stumbling block, and that virginity is a marker of a woman’s value.
- Instead, let’s simply teach that God blessed us with sexuality and sexual desire to teach us that we are created for promise, for vulnerability, and for the pursuit and exchange of love that compels us toward self sacrifice.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today!
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including a wives-only section), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn challenge your definition of "purity" and tackle some myths propagated by the Sexual Purity Movement.
- Purity means that your whole being is filled and directed by one thing: God. Sexual purity is not merely about what we are doing or not doing with our genitals!
- It is dangerous theology when we come to believe and teach that sex is evil, men can’t control sexual urges, women’s bodies are inherently a stumbling block, and that virginity is idolized.
- Instead, let’s simply teach that God blessed us with sexuality and sexual desire to teach us that we are created for promise, for vulnerability, and for the pursuit and exchange of love that compels us toward self-sacrifice.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today! www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including husbands-only and wives-only sections), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode Matt & Jenn answer another handful of listener questions, including:
- How to handle daily excuses for not having sex.
- How to find a qualified godly therapist.
- Recommendations for couples bible study.
- Dealing with sensitive topics
As you consider these questions and our answers, take note of the important issues and dynamics in your own relationship. Be willing to ask the hard questions and be confronted by the truth.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today!
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including a wives-only section), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn dig into the mail bag for a potpourri of topics including:
- Can scheduling sex still be romantic?
- How to prioritize your marriage when facing the challenges of raising a special needs child?
- Have we ever been met with resistance by church leaders for talking about marriage and sex?
- Do you have any advice for planning a romantic vacation?
As you consider these questions and our answers, take note of the important issues and dynamics in your own relationship. Be willing to ask the hard questions and be confronted by the truth.
Join us at the 2022 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 22-24, in Houston, TX. Registration is now open, but space is limited and we expect to sell out again. So, register today!
Announcing Covenant Club! Our online community with discussion forums (including a wives-only section), monthly interactive webinars, and other resources to help answer your questions, provide encouragements and learn from other covenant-focused couples. Join us! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the challenges of rebuilding your sexual relationship and the challenges of maintaining intimacy AFTER the baby comes.
- If you are blessed by the birth of children, your sex life and relational intimacy will change, especially in the immediate postpartum timeframe.
- You must each acknowledge the physical and emotional challenges of this time with grace, patience, sacrifice and compassion for your spouse.
- Your new baby will be most blessed if you learn to prioritize your marriage and your intimacy during this time.
Announcing Covenant Club! -- Join our online community including discussion forums (featuring a wives-only section), monthly interactive webinars, and other exclusive resources. www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate*
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode Matt & Jenn speak to the challenges of maintaining a sexual relationship and all other realms of connection during pregnancy.
- In almost all situations, sex during pregnancy is safe. If you are unsure, ask your health care provider and be sure that you ask specific questions about what’s allowed or not.
- Pregnancy will change many things about a woman’s body and biochemistry that might make sex more challenging.
- But, there are ways to overcome these obstacles and to grow all points of closeness and intimacy in your marriage during this special time.
Announcing Covenant Club! -- Our online community for covenant lovers including discussion forums and other exclusive resources where you will find a safe place to ask questions and offer encouragement. www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions for the podcast, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate*
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt and Jenn discuss period sex -- is it biblical? is it healthy? why would I want to? are there ways to make it easier?
- If you both are interested, sex during her period is safe, scriptural, and maybe even beneficial. It just may have to look different than at other times.
- No, a wife is NOT obligated to perform sexual favors during her period in order to keep her husband from being tempted. An obligation mindset is an objectification of women and demeaning to men.
- Whether you engage in any degree of sex or not during her period, be intentional to not let your relationship drift apart during this time.
Announcing Covenant Club! -- launching end of January 2022. Sign up during prelaunch and get the first three months for FREE! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate*
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the oft quoted Bible passage 1 Corinthians 7:1-5 and whether this scripture gives a spouse the right to demand sex from his/her spouse.
- Overall, 1 Corinthians 7 teaches that I am obligated to meet the sexual needs of my spouse.
- But this passage does NOT give me authority to demand sex from my spouse. Demanding or offering sex out of obligation is not Christ-like and is unhealthy for your marriage.
- When there is a sexual fast in your marriage, there needs needs to be ongoing conversation about it and it needs to be for the betterment of the spiritual and emotional relationship.
Come and Meet Us In-Person:
Louisville, KY — March 4 & 5: DESIRING an Intimate Covenant, marriage seminar. Details and register here: www.iclou.fun
Louisville, KY — March 5: God’s Plan for Singleness & Sexuality, all singles aged high school and older. Register by emailing: kmberthold@gmail.com
Tampa, FL — March 26: Tampa Marriage Day! Registration details coming soon. Stay tuned to the podcast and social media.
Announcing Covenant Club! -- launching January 2022. Sign up during prelaunch and get the first three months for FREE! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate*
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the concept of a husband helping with household chores to win sexual favors from his wife, a.k.a. "choreplay." Is this a fun, win-win idea? What are the dangers of this transactional approach to sex?
- There is certainly some truth in the idea that a wife will be more inclined toward sex if a husband is willing to help with the endless tasks required to effectively run a home.
- Choreplay is a dangerous idea when one or both spouses begin to believe that sex is transactional or husband-focused, rather than a mutually pleasurable means of further building connection.
- View sex and household chores in a way that promotes connection — with humility and a servant’s heart.
Announcing Covenant Club! -- launching January 2022. Sign up during prelaunch and get the first three months for FREE! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate*
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share their method of critically assessing the state of their own marital intimacy and some tips on how to have the conversation about setting goals for better connection.
- For real progress in your marriage, it’s important to critically evaluate the past and to set goals for the future.
- A thorough evaluation of your marriage should include assessment of each realm of intimacy: spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical.
- In setting relationship goals, I need to define what I am going to change individually with specific and realistic plan.
We took our own “State of the Covenant” conversation and created a detailed form with conversation starters and a step-by-step breakdown of the process that we use to regularly assess our relationship status and to set intimacy-building goals. We've organized our conversation and the form around the four realms intimacy: spiritual, mental, emotional and physical.
- Free for Covenant Club members. If you’ve signed up for pre-launch, we’ll send you this form in an email this week. And once Covenant Club is live, you’ll be able to access the form whenever you want.
- For the rest of you, you can find the form in our store on the website: https://intimatecovenant.com/services/
Covenant Club! -- launching January 2022. Sign up during prelaunch and get the first three months for FREE! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
* If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
This episode includes segments of a live Q&A session from a recent seminar held in Columbus, Indiana. Matt & Jenn tackle the following questions:
- "How do you overcome lack of sexual desire because of physical limitations?"
- "Are all forms of sex ok? Are any types of sex with my spouse sinful?"
- "I have been wanting to enhance our sexual connections through non-intercourse actives such as kissing on the couch for 5 minutes. However, there is a fear of even starting these activities as then going all the way to ejaculation would be pressured within hours to days following. How do we get past that fear and enjoy more non-intercourse sexual connections?"
- "How do you work through when you’ve lost physical attraction?"
- "Mental intimacy --'be of the same mind' -- how does that work when sometimes our differences of opinion are strong?"
Announcing Covenant Club! -- launching January 2022. Sign up during prelaunch and get the first three months for FREE! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate*
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
This episode includes segments of a live Q&A session from a recent seminar held in Columbus, Indiana. Matt & Jenn tackle the following questions:
- My husband agreed to get a vasectomy over a year ago, but he still hasn't initiated the process. Our contraception methods are unreliable and this is causing a great deal of anxiety. "How can I let him know we are a team but also that this is so difficult and very emotional for me to go thru each month ...carrying with me the concerns of getting pregnant?"
- "When you don’t feel respected, appreciated, admired and wanted, how do you get your desire back to be intimate with your spouse?" "How do you feel desirable when your spouse has a wandering eye?"
- "My partner and I started watching a TV show together and over the years the content has become more racy, but not outright pornographic. How do I warn my partner that it’s creating mental temptation without violating their emotional state?"
- I have been listening to your podcast every week since week 1. I have been enthusiastic about starting conversations from these episodes almost every week. However, my enthusiasm to have conversation with my spouse some how comes across as pressure and not many words come back. How do I create a safe, open environment that is conducive to my spouse opening up and wanting to discuss these topics?
More Q&A next week...
Announcing Covenant Club! -- launching January 2022. Sign up during prelaunch and get the first three months for FREE! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate*
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn challenge you to "embrace conflict" and offer some ground rules on "fighting fair" in your marriage.
- Learn to embrace conflict recognizing that conflict is an opportunity to learn more about your spouse. Your job is not to “win” or even eliminate every conflict. Rather your goal is to use conflict to learn to face problems together.
- Treat your spouse with love and respect, always. Recognize and avoid the manipulative techniques that you might be using like explosion, silence, withholding, or tears.
- You may be right about a certain issue, but if your tone is hurtful you are dead wrong. Value your spouse’s heart over being “right.”
Announcing Covenant Club! -- launching January 2022. Sign up during prelaunch and get the first three months for FREE! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
Join us in Louisville, KY on March 4-5, 2022 for a Marriage Seminar -- "DESIRING an Intimate Covenant." For more details and to register, click the link: www.iclou.fun
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
* If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn offer advice for sexual pursuers and responders when giving and receiving sexy gifts.
- Consider starting a sexy Christmas tradition. This is a great time to gift your sexual relationship by exchanging sexy presents and/or by making time for a Christmas Eve quickie.
- If you are a sexual pursuer, be sure that you are primarily considering what is best for encouraging sexual connection for your spouse.
- Sexual responders should consider how to get in the Christmas spirit by giving their beloved a generous sexual gift.
- Primarily, this season should be an opportunity to find connection amid the chaos. Seek each other first.
Announcing Covenant Club! -- launching January 2022. Sign up during prelaunch and get the first three months for FREE! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
* If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode (#69), Matt and Jenn discuss sex positions (for no obvious reason). Is it important to learn new things in bed? What meanings do different positions have?
- Couples that have many ways to enjoy each other have insurance against monotony, aging, and health-related sexual challenges.
- Different sexual styles and positions bring different meanings and points of enjoyment to your sex life.
- Above all else, use sex to build connection in your relationship no matter how you do it.
We referenced these helpful resources:
- Christian Friendly Sex Positions -- https://www.christianfriendlysexpositions.com
- Married Dance -- https://marrieddance.com
- Intimately Us app -- https://intimately.us/
- Ultimate Intimacy app -- https://ultimateintimacy.com/
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
Announcing Covenant Club! -- launching January 2022. Sign up during prelaunch and get the first three months for FREE! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss how to keep your relationship and your sex life from freezing over during the busy holiday season.
- Protect your spouse. Make sure they know that you’ve got their back. Approach your extended families with an “us vs. them” mentality.
- Prioritize your spouse and your relationship. You absolutely MUST make time to continue to connect with your spouse, even at the expense of making others happy - even your kids.
- Plan ahead so that you are prepared to overcome challenges to your sex life during this holiday season.
Announcing Covenant Club! -- launching January 2022. Sign up during prelaunch and get the first three months for FREE! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS - If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share an excerpt from a session of the 2021 Retreat, titled, "Submitting to one another -- do I know what my spouse really needs?" Learn new moves to help transform conflict into opportunities for growth and connection.
- Real change starts by seeing my spouse more clearly -- empathy. See their circumstances, their struggles and their desires.
- If I want change, I have to protect their space for change. I have to reward their vulnerability instead of punishing with judgement, criticism, or coldness.
- Recognize that we need each other — interdependency. Begin to see conflicts as opportunities to grow & connect; opportunities to face life together.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Announcing Covenant Club! -- launching January 2022. Sign up during prelaunch and get the first three months for FREE! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn continue last week's discussion about encouraging husbands to be leaders by specifically addressing spiritual leadership in the home.
- Husbands are given the responsibility of overseeing the spiritual growth of the home and this responsibility is often shirked by many men. Many wives longingly desire to see their husbands grow into a strong spiritual leader.
- Criticism and pressure are rarely effective ways to motivate a reluctant husband. Instead, be clear and realistic about your expectations, offering praise and gratitude as motivation.
- Husbands, spiritual growth is in your best interest. If your wife is like most, your growth as a spiritual leader will exponentially improve your romantic and sexual attractiveness.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Join the Covenant Club — our new online community for covenant-focused married couples! www.intimatecovenant.com/members
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer a listener question from a wife who wants to know how she can encourage her husband to be a better leader and more engaged in the relationship.
- Sometimes, our disappointment with leadership is because we have unrealistic expectations. However, clearly many husbands are negligent in their role as head of their household.
- If you are a wife, your best tool to encourage your husband to lead is to be a godly respectful supporter.
- Don’t be afraid to hold each other accountable in the roles that God has given.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt and Jenn answer a listener question about making eye contact during sex. We'll also discuss ways to use eye contact to enhance emotional and sexual pleasure using eye contact.
- Eye contact requires vulnerability, but increasing eye contact in your relationship - in and out of the bedroom - can improve emotional and sexual connection.
- There may be reasons that we are seeking or avoiding eye contact during sex. This begs the question and conversation needed in your marriage, “What does eye contact during sex mean to me?”
- If you want more eye contact, you must be a place for your spouse to feel safe enough to let you “see” them deeply.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share segments from the 2021 Annual Marriage Retreat Q&A session, recorded with a live audience. We tackle topics including sexy hygiene, dealing with aversion to the sex act, overcoming sexual trauma, and how to "keep striving" without pressuring.
We also want to recognize our Retreat sponsors again. THANK YOU!
Married Dance — marrieddance.com
Websites that Sell — websitesthatsell.com
Ghost Sherpa — ghostsherpa.com
InfiniteMoon — infinitemoon.com
Mentionables — mentionables.com
Dating Divas — thedatingdivas.com
Uberlube — uberlube.com
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
This episode is an excerpt from a LIVE recording at the 2021 Intimate Covenant Annual Marriage Retreat in Houston, TX. Matt & Jenn field questions about recommendations for sex toys, using Skype sex when couples are apart and how to begin the journey to healing after betrayal by pornography addiction.
Thank you to these incredible companies that supported our 2021 Retreat:Married Dance — marrieddance.com
Websites That Sell — websitesthatsell.com
Ghost Sherpa — ghostsherpa.com
InfiniteMoon — infinitemoon.com
Mentionables — mentionables.com
The Dating Divas — thedatingdivas.com
Uberlube — uberlube.com
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode Matt & Jenn complete their series on overcoming common barriers to sex with discussion about work, travel (physical separation) and separate bedtimes.
- Learning to identify and eliminate barriers to sex in our relationships requires honest introspection and humility. This process will improve our married sex lives, but also benefit every other aspect of your relationship.
- Keep your job in perspective. No career or job is worth sacrificing your marriage over.
- If you must be physically separated by travel, have a plan for how you will maintain connection while away from each other.
- As much as possible, go to bed together. It’s better for your relationship overall and certainly better for your sex life.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt and Jenn discuss overcoming some more barriers to sex -- health, aging, screens and humor.
- Learning to identify and eliminate barriers to sex in our relationships requires honest introspection and humility. This process will improve our married sex lives, but also benefit every other aspect of your relationship.
- Since sex is so much more than joining genitals, we can still have pleasurable and deeply meaningful sex even if our body fails us.
- Put down your screens and be willing to lean into vulnerable conversations. The risk and anxiety will be worth it for your relationship.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt and Jenn discuss how to deal with one of the most challenging barriers to sex ...kids.
- Daily life often seems to get in the way, creating barriers that hinder our ability to enjoy the sexual connection we would like to have with one another.
- Have an action plan to combat the barriers that interfere with your sex life! Learn to name your barriers, asking yourself “why?” these barriers exist, then share these barriers with your spouse. Be willing to hear their barriers too and then together discuss solutions.
- Kids are a beautiful blessing and direct results of the sexual intimacy in your marriage. But, they are also a primary threat to the ongoing sexual intimacy in your marriage if you aren’t taking intentional steps to prioritize your covenant.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt and Jenn discuss the pitfalls of expecting our spouse to be a mind-reader and how to avoid the fight over sexual rejection.
- Neither of you is a mind-reader. Each must be clear about sexual desires and expectations. Foster intimate conversation on all levels in your relationship.
- Sexual rejection doesn’t have to result in a fight. Grace, empathy, and compassion are required for each to better understand what sexual rejection means to the other.
- When there is greater intimacy overall, sexual rejection is less divisive. But, each of you should also examine how you can reduce the frequency of rejection.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn recommend sparking some fun and romance in your marriage by flirting!
- Flirting with your spouse is important to your relationship because it reinforces your commitment to one another in a playful, fun, and romantic way.
- Flirting lets your spouse know that they are special to you and worth the extra effort.
- Take some time to consider how you can reignite the romantic spark in your relationship with a little flirting.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the importance of creating a master bedroom that is a haven for you and your beloved. Also, we'll share crucial details to consider when choosing the best mattress for sex.
- Prioritize your master bedroom. It should be a place of solace and escape with your beloved. Invest the time and effort into making it just that!
- Your bedroom is your sex room. Create an atmosphere that helps prepare you emotionally, romantically, physically, and logistically for sex.
- Deepen your sexual intimacy by decorating in a way that helps pleasantly engage all of your senses.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form.
Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating, and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the special way that wives are asked to be submissive to their husbands. Specifically, we consider what this looks like in the sexual relationship.
- Like we talked about last week, all are to be “submissive to one another,” yet, there is a special way in which wives are to be submissive to their husbands.
- Submission must be defined and practiced in the way that the church is subject to Christ by fulfilling the precious role of womanhood with a “gentle and quiet spirit”.
- In the bedroom, wives must be willing to engage in a shared sexual relationship by responding enthusiastically, serving her husband, and owning her responsibility to grow.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss what it means for a husband to be "head of the wife." And, how does this concept extend to the bedroom?
- Before attempting to understand headship, I must first recognize my obligation to submit to all. Mutual submission is essential to every human relationship and crucially important between a husband and wife.
- Headship is defined and exemplified by Christ’s headship of the church. This means that authority is the smallest part of headship, and only meaningful if exercised through complete self-sacrifice.
- My role as a head when it comes to our sexual relationship is to love, protect, nurture and sanctify my wife — spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically. My needs must come second.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss how a wife can learn to balance her roles as both caregiver (Mom Mode) and lover (Lover Girl).
- Most wives struggle to find balance between their roles as a caregiver and lover. But, a wife can learn to be both, at the same time.
- Wives can access “Lover-Girl” more easily when they begin actively looking for sexual cues, learn to harness their husband’s sexual energy, and see the benefits of sex for themselves.
- Husbands can help by offering and providing a place of retreat from the constant demands on his wife rather than presenting himself as just another need.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form.
Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn challenge you to bring your heart, soul, strength, and mind to the marriage bed. Plus, get a sneak peak at the theme and topics for the 2021 Marriage Retreat!
- The focus of the 2021 Intimate Covenant Retreat is to renew our view of marriage as a spiritual endeavor and elevate our purpose beyond the day-to-day obligations of running a household.
- Sex should be a place where a couple joins more than just two sets of genitals. Sex should be an opportunity to connect heart, soul, strength, and mind.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Connect with the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form.
Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss how the betrayer can help in healing and restoration of the relationship.
- If you have betrayed your spouse, you must humbly demonstrate that you feel the pain you have caused AND be willing to drastically change your behavior because of it.
- Rebuilding a relationship after betrayal will require time and vulnerability on the part of the betrayer.
- With betrayal, understanding the dynamic that led to the betrayal must be part of the healing and restoration of the relationship.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Don't miss the special offer for referring your friends!!!
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
or submit an ANONYMOUS question via our website: intimatecovenant.com/podcast
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss some research and statistics about how normal couples have sex.
- Most married couples have sex between twice a month to twice a week, depending on which data you look at. Sexual frequency does decline with age, but older couples still have fairly frequent sex.
- Nearly all couples have intercourse. Many also engage in oral sex and partnered masturbation.
- Sexual frequency and sexual practices do not necessarily correlate with relationship quality. Ultimately, our sexual practices and frequencies should be determined by what is best for the oneness in our relationship, not driven by trying to be “normal” or “average.”
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
or, submit an anonymous question via our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: "Contact the Podcast."
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss moving past the pain of betrayal towards restoration and healing in your marriage.
- The first step to overcoming betrayal is to admit your feelings of hurt, anger, resentment or grief and confront your spouse with your feelings.
- Talk about it in the right way and in the right setting. Know when you need help.
- Believe in the power of healing found in a full connection with your beloved.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn challenge and encourage us to put in the hard work necessary to grow and expand our sexual relationship.
- Believing that great sex just occurs spontaneously and effortlessly is actually preventing us from achieving good sex.
- Great sex, like any other mastery, is the product of consistent, intentional work over time.
- Take responsibility for your part in growing your sexual relationship. Then, commit yourself to learning, cultivating and expanding your sex towards greater oneness.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn consider guidelines that honor God and our spouses when talking to our friends about sex.
- It is important for God’s people to be talking about sex in a positive and holy way. There is power in a community of believers sharing the beauty of God’s plan.
- But, sharing intimate details about your personal sex life with anyone other than your spouse is a betrayal. Don’t do it.
- Follow the lead of Scripture. There is a way to talk about sex that is wholesome and appropriate without giving away all of your privacy.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share some of their favorite marriage and sex book recommendations.
- Find good resources that encourage your marriage and share these with you spouse.
- If you have trouble in your marriage, seek help from those capable of helping — spiritual mentors, church elders, and professional therapists.
- If you are a leader, especially in your local congregation, strengthen your marriage. And, equip yourself to help other marriages by developing a biblical view of marriage and sex — good books or other resources can help.
- Good Books for Leaders (but really for everyone)
- Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson
- 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman
- General Marriage & Sexuality Books
- Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas
- Cherish by Gary Thomas
- God Loves Sex by Dan Allender & Tremper Longman III
- Intimate Allies by Dan Allender & Tremper Longman III
- Wives
- Hot, Holy and Humorous by J Parker (also a blog by the same name)
- The Good Girls Guide to Great Sex by Sheila Gregoire
- PreMarital
- Not Yet Married by Marshall Segal
- 9 Conversations for a Doubt Free Wedding by Gary Thomas
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer questions about using private masturbation as a way to help deal with sexual desire and arousal differences between spouses.
- Any two individuals in a marriage will be quite different when it comes to sexual desire and motivations for sex. Our challenge is to recognize these differences and turn toward each other with empathy, humility, and service.
- The purpose of our sexual relationship is to promote, accentuate and motivate the fullness of connection in a covenant relationship. We should be motivated to serve our spouse, learn about them, and grow together.
- When we change the focus of sex to be primarily about pleasure, orgasm, or arousal (especially our own); then we miss the fulness of the sexual connection and the opportunity to benefit the whole relationship.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Including a special performance by Dawn & Hawkes.
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn tackle a listener's email question, "Should we tell our kids about the sexual sins of our past? How much should we share?"
- Talking to your kids about sex must be an ongoing conversation so that they feel comfortable about the topic and that they see you as experts for sex and relationship advice.
- Sharing your failings with your kids doesn’t make you less respectable, it makes you more relatable. It makes you more credible, especially if you are frank, honest and vulnerable in every aspect of your life.
- In conversations with your kids about sex and your own failings, focus on the grace of God — His power and the beauty of His plan.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share their personal struggles with marriage and sex. You won't want to miss this touching and vulnerable episode.
- We want you to know that you’re not alone. We know brokenness. But we also know redemption, restoration and unity through the power of the gospel and God’s plan for marriage and sex.
- We’re here to share that with you and to build a community for vulnerability and encouragement.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn challenge you to carefully evaluate whether your sex routines are really the best way to promote connection.
- Every couple has a sexual routine or script that they follow for most sexual encounters. But is your routine promoting the best sex and most connection for your marriage?
- Start by busting the myth that sex starts with intercourse and ends with ejaculation. Make love all day, every day, by frequently connecting emotional and sexually.
- Assess every stage of your sexual routine and determine if there is something that you can do to facilitate, enhance or extend your sexual script so that you are building oneness and maximizing pleasure.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this final episode in the series on Date Night, Matt & Jenn give advice on how to transition the energy from Date Night into the bedroom.
- Date Night is critical for the spiritual, emotional, romantic, and sexual health of your relationship. Make it a priority in your marriage!
- How you do Date Night is also critical to maximizing the benefit to your marriage and promoting oneness. Here’s 5 tips to make the most of your time:
- Don’t leave it to chance, plan it!
- When you’re on a date, give your undivided attention.
- Promote connection through touch, eye contact and intimate conversation.
- Novelty accentuates the impact. Do something new together.
- Don’t lose the energy when you get home. Make a quick transition to the bedroom.
Helpful Resources:
- Dating Divas: https://www.thedatingdivas.com/
- Crated With Love: https://cratedwithlove.com/
- Gottman Card Decks: https://www.gottman.com
- Gottman Card Decks App: https://www.gottman.com/couples/apps/
- Ultimate Intimacy App: https://ultimateintimacy.com/
- Intimately Us: https://intimately.us/
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn continue the discussion about Date Night by offering 5 tips to make for a great date night.
- Date Night is critical for the spiritual, emotional, romantic, and sexual health of your relationship. Make it a priority in your marriage!
- How you do Date Night is also critical to maximizing the benefit to your marriage and promoting oneness. Here’s 5 tips to make the most of your time:
- Don’t leave it to chance, plan it.
- When you’re on a date, give your undivided attention.
- Promote connection through touch, eye contact and intimate conversation.
...Next week we’ll discuss : - Novelty accentuates the impact. Do something new together.
- Don’t lose the energy when you get home. Make a quick transition to the bedroom.
Helpful Resources:
- Dating Divas: https://www.thedatingdivas.com/
- Crated With Love: https://cratedwithlove.com/
- Gottman Card Decks: https://www.gottman.com
- Gottman Card Decks App: https://www.gottman.com/couples/apps/
- Ultimate Intimacy App: https://ultimateintimacy.com/
- Intimately Us: https://intimately.us/
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn begin a series devoted to Date Night - one of their favorite topics.
- Date Night is critical for the spiritual, emotional, romantic, and sexual health of your relationship. Make it a priority in your marriage.
- Date night should be about building connection, not just for your entertainment.
- Prioritize Date Night by scheduling and planning ahead. Put it on your calendar and in the budget!
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or other group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
Matt & Jenn continue the discussion challenging wives to consider why they might be resistant to hot, holy sex in their marriage bed.
- A wife may be resistant to sex because she is morally conflicted or is carrying shame from sexual sin or trauma. The answer is to allow your mind, body, heart and soul to be transformed by the blood of Jesus. Get the help that you need from God’s word and God’s people, including a professional counselor if needed.
- Another reason why a wife may be resistant to exploring sex with her husband is that she feels insecure with the sexual boundaries of the relationship. Confident sex requires conversations about firm sexual boundaries.
- A wife is uniquely capable of teaching her husband how to connect emotionally THROUGH sex. Commit to connecting emotionally within the context of sexual arousal.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn begin a discussion challenging wives' reasons for avoiding sex.
- There are many good reasons that a wife may be resistant to sex in her marriage. But, a wife must recognize that the quality of your sex life will impact the quality of the rest of your marriage, and vice versa.
- If you are saying no to sex because you are emotionally disconnected, intentionally prioritize your entire marriage relationship. Make the choice to connect daily — emotionally, spiritually, romantically, sexually…
- Say “yes” sometimes, even when it’s inconvenient or feels vulnerable - THEN, commit to engaging your heart, mind, body, and soul. You might be surprised how enjoyable it could be when you let go of the control.
We'll address a few more reasons next week!
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in Spring, TX: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss reasons why a husband's sexual invitations may be rejected and what that might teach us about ourselves and our relationship.
- Before protesting that you are being unfairly rejected, ask yourself, “Would I want to have sex with someone like me?” Have I met my wife’s needs before expecting her to meet mine? Have I made it easy for her to connect with me spiritually, emotionally and physically?
- Some reasons your wife may be resistant to sex with you include:
- She has a responsive sexual desire and is not naturally inclined to initiate
- She doesn’t feel connected.
- She doesn’t feel attractive.
- She is focused on being a mom, not a lover.
- She is tired, stressed, or depressed.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in Spring, TX: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat/
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt and Jenn discuss the differences in how we access and express sexual desire. How do we handle it when one spouse seemingly wants sex more than the other?
- In general, a man’s sexual desire is like a microwave (spontaneous) and a woman’s sexual desire is like a crockpot (responsive). Neither is right or wrong and neither is better or worse.
- Empathize with your spouse’s position by offering grace, mercy, and understanding. Learn to embrace your own desire with contentment and enthusiasm.
- Each of you has a role to play in building and maintaining a solid relationship and circumstances where eroticism and sexual passion can flourish.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in Spring, TX: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss principles to guide the difficult conversation with your spouse about your sinful sexual history.
- Healing begins with confession (James 5:16). If you want true intimacy, you must reveal yourself. Your intimacy is only as deep as your honesty.
- Use great discretion about what facts or details you share with each other. This process is often best guided by a professional therapist or trusted spiritual mentor.
- Acknowledge the pain and take proper steps to grieve and forgive each other.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in Spring, TX, September 23-25: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Take advantage of Early Bird Pricing until April 1 (no joke!)
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn talk about pre-marital sex and the impact it has on our marriage relationship and in the marriage bed.
- Sex outside of marriage has consequences — whether it’s before or after marriage, with your spouse or with someone else.
- Often (especially for women) these experiences cause barriers of shame which make it difficult to fully enjoy sex within the proper context of marriage covenant.
- The shame of past sexual sin can be redeemed within intimate relationship through godly confession and meditation.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in Spring, TX, September 23-25:
https://www.intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Take advantage of Early Bird Pricing until April 1 (no joke!)
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn respond to some listener questions about overcoming the disgust response in our sex lives — that unconscious grossed-out reaction that we might have to some forms of sexual activity.
- Differentiate your sexual preferences from God’s sexual boundaries.
- Disgust is a learned behavior and can be a significant sexual brake for those of us with a sensitive conscience. This becomes a problem in marriage when each spouse’s disgust levels are very different.
- Accept that you can change your preferences over time and learn to enjoy all of God’s glorious gifts of sexual pleasure. You don’t have to absolutely love everything, but you can learn to find enjoyment AND CONNECTION in everything.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in Spring, TX, September 23-25: https://intimatecovenant.com/2021-marriage-retreat-you-are-invited/
Take advantage of Early Bird Pricing until April 1 (no joke!)
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
Sex should never be painful - emotionally, spiritually, or physically. In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss some common problems that might cause sex to be painful for a woman and what you might be able to do about it.
- There are a number of reasons why sex could be painful for women. Proper assessment and therapy by a doctor and/or physiotherapist may be required.
- When sex is painful, the entire relationship will be affected. You must both be willing to communicate about it and be willing to find solutions so that your relationship can grow toward full intimacy.
- The solution will depend on the actual cause(s) for your pain, but know that there is real hope to enjoy a full and extraordinary sex life, even if it’s painful now.
Helpful Resources:
- Hope & Her: https://www.vaginismus.com/
- Sheila Gregoire: To Love, Honor, and Vacuum https://tolovehonorandvacuum.com/vaginismus-sex-hurts/
- Married Dance: Penis Bumper https://marrieddance.com/shop/for-him/penis-rings/the-bumper-deep-thrust-cushion/
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat: https://intimatecovenant.com/2021-marriage-retreat-you-are-invited/ Take advantage of Early Bird Pricing until April 1 (no joke!)
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the two most common problems that occur for men in the bedroom, erectile dysfunction (ED) and premature ejaculation (PE).
- If you want to function better with your wife, stop masturbating by yourself.
- Do something about your sexual dysfunction! Your reluctance to deal with the problem is making your anxiety worse which is making the manifestation of your problem worse.
- Take care of yourself: No smoking, drinking, or drugs. Get in better shape.
- Talk to your doctor!
- Take care of your relationship.
- Sexual dysfunction is normal and common. Most of us, probably all of us, deal with problems in bed from time to time. Don’t be afraid to talk about it. Don’t be afraid to do something about it.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat: https://intimatecovenant.com/2021-marriage-retreat-you-are-invited/ Take advantage of Early Bird Pricing until April 1 (no joke!)
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
Today on the podcast Matt and Jenn compare the blight of mercy sex and the art of a quickie.
- Stop settling for mercy sex. Don’t accept it. Don’t offer it. Sex is for connection, not just to use your spouse’s body or to be used.
- On the other hand, a quickie is a great tool in a sexually and emotionally healthy marriage. A quickie can offer one or both of you a quick recharge and reconnection, even in the midst of busyness.
- The best quickies happen when you both understand each other’s expectations and when you have made proper preparation. Sanctify even ordinary opportunities for sex in your marriage.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in Spring, TX: https://intimatecovenant.com/2021-marriage-retreat-you-are-invited/
Take advantage of Early Bird Pricing until April 1 (no joke!)
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn are answering some of your questions! We love getting your emails -- keep them coming! It really helps us to know what you want us to talk about and how we can best help your marriage! Today we discuss a listener’s email that has several great questions included about female arousal, arousal aids, masturbation and more!
- Embrace fantasy as a way to advance the plot in YOUR story. Harness sexual stimuli to fuel desire for your beloved.
- Whatever means you are considering to help enhance your lovemaking, first be sure that you have drawn solid biblical boundaries regarding sex. Then, lovingly consider, “Will this encourage more intimacy and oneness in our marriage?”
Helpful reference: Married Dance -- a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid superstore that’s porn and nudity-free!
Registration & more information about the Annual Retreat: https://intimatecovenant.com/2021-marriage-retreat-you-are-invited/
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss some exciting news about what's happening with Intimate Covenant outside the podcast and we chat about what couples can expect from the upcoming annual marriage retreat.
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THANK YOU! We’re deeply humbled by the success of the podcast. If our message has helped your marriage, we would be incredibly thankful if you would share, rate and review us on iTunes.
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Registration for the Retreat opens on February 14 - Valentine’s Day
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Challenging and informative sessions to build oneness in your marriage - spiritually, emotionally and sexually
- Get-away for relaxation, fun, and focused conversation with your spouse.
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Make new friends!
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If you want to bring us to your community for a seminar, send us an email - let’s make it happen!
Shout out to our amazing website designers: Websites That Sell!
If you need a new website, please contact brent@websitesthatsell
Download our free resource titled, What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?
at our website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
This week Matt and Jenn continue their discussion about setting godly expectations for marriage by asking, "Am I expecting too little for my marriage?"
- In some marriages, one or both spouses are content to settle for “good enough” or “better than.” This is not a reflection of the quality of relationship that Christ demonstrated towards His Bride, the church.
- A godly spouse must be willing to be held accountable. This requires humbly and vulnerability.
- A godly spouse must also have the courage and determination to hold their partner accountable.
Download our free resource titled, What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?
at our website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
This week, Matt & Jenn ask the question, "Am I expecting too much for my marriage?"
- One of the most harmful misunderstandings about marriage is when we behave and act like my spouse is given for the sole purpose to make me happy. As a result, we often expect too much from marriage.
- It’s not wrong to want to improve your marriage relationship. But, it is wrong to first fail to acknowledge the ways that God has provided for you.
- You will also continue to be disappointed if you expect that your spouse can solve your emotional, spiritual, and sexual problems. That’s your job!
Download our free resource titled, What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?
at our website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits: Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
Matt & Jenn discuss setting goals for your marriage in this New Year by asking the question, "What do I want from my marriage in 2021?"
- Mature past the selfish motivations of relationship and begin to see the true fulfillment of covenant love built on self-sacrifice — in your marriage and in your relationship to God.
- For 2021 (and everyday), ask the questions, “What do I want FOR my marriage?” “What more can I give to this covenant?”
- Begin the assessment of your relationship with humility and self-reflection. Then, have a conversation with your spouse to determine what you can do for them and for your marriage.
Download our free resource titled, What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?
at our website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
This week, Matt & Jenn unpack their emotions after giving away their daughter in marriage. How are we feeling and how does this experience change our perspective on our own relationship?
- Be sure that you've invested in your own marriage. Otherwise, when you give your kids away, you'll have given yourself away, too.
- It's possible and necessary to hold both joy and sorrow at the same time. Acknowledge that and share it.
- Real joy and fulfillment is in a lifetime of intimacy. It's worth the effort and pain!
Download our free resource titled, What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?
at our website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits: Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
This episode includes an excerpt from the 2020 Retreat titled, Redeeming Sexual Desire — Unlocking the Path to Sexual Arousal. The section that we’re sharing with you is about addressing a common sexual brake — self-criticism. Jenn will challenge you to consider that how you treat yourself will impact how well you can enjoy your sex life.
If you would like to join us for next year’s Retreat, save the date: September 23-25, 2021. That’s a Thursday evening through Saturday afternoon in Houston, Texas.
Download our free resource titled, What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?
at our website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
This week on the podcast, we're sharing an excerpt from the 2020 Retreat titled, Honoring the Romance of Redemption. This session considers principles from the timeless, romantic love story of Ruth and Boaz. We hope that your marriage is blessed and motivated as we approach the new opportunities of a New Year!
Download our free resource titled, What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?
at our website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits: Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
Today on the podcast Matt and Jenn are talking about Christmas. We all know Christmas time is supposed to be the “most wonderful time of the year” but reality is- it’s often full of a lot of tension, stress, and conflict. Specifically, for married couples, there is often conflict regarding how sexual Christmas should or should not be.
Credit Paul Byerly for starting the the Annual Christmas Eve Quickie. Read more excellent thoughtful writing from Paul at: https://themarriagebed.com
Consider how you would answer these questions. Would your spouse agree or disagree with your response?
- Do you have more or less sex over the holidays?
- Do you have better or worse sex during December?
- Is your relationship more or less connected by Christmas Eve than the rest of the year?
- What would it take for us to have a more sex this Christmas?
- What would it take for us to feel more connected this Christmas?
Wrap up:
- Recognize and discuss the challenges of the season to your relationship. What are you going to do to prevent and repair the conflicts in your relationship, specifically when it comes to sex?
- Pursuers, acknowledge the challenges that your spouse is facing during the season. Bring realistic expectations and do what it takes to maintain connection. Find out what your spouse actually needs.
- Responders, acknowledge that your spouse deeply desires you — that’s a good thing! Sexual connection for your spouse is one of the greatest gifts that you can offer during this season.
Download our free resource titled, What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?
at our website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing! Merry Christmas!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits: Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
Matt & Jenn discuss the wide wet world of sexual lubricants. Who needs them? When to use them? And how to choose one?
- Wetness and hardness are not accurate indicators of your arousal level.
- Accessory lubrication can enhance the sexual experience, even if you are a perfectly normally functioning person.
- Sex lubricants are broadly categorized as water-based, silicone-based, and oil-based. Each category has its own pro/cons. Try them all to know what works best for you!
Download our free resource titled, What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?
at our website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits: Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
Matt & Jenn discuss the relational, emotional, and physical challenges of pregnancy and introducing babies into your marriage - specifically, how these challenges affect your sexual relationship.
- Both husbands and wives must recognize the strain that conceiving, carrying, and raising babies will have on a marriage relationship, especially in the bedroom. Be willing to frequently express your feelings, needs and desires. As always, be eager to serve your spouse.
- Married life will present many challenges and even the tremendous blessing of children will bring opportunities for growth or resentment. Be intentional maximize the opportunities to grow
- Have a “you and me together” mindset because ultimately, Lord willing, the kids will leave and you’ll be left to spend your remaining years celebrating your covenant.
Helpful resource: https://www.christianfriendlysexpositions.com/tag/while-pregnant/
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Download our free resource titled, What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?
at our website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss making the moves to make it happen — that anxiety-filled, over-thought, and over-done vulnerable moment when a one spouse propositions the other for sex. We'll tackle some questions like: Who’s responsibility is it to initiate sex? How does one initiate sex? Is there a reliable go-to move or pick up line? And we’ll even offer some playful suggestions to help mix it up.
- Who is supposed to initiate sex? It doesn’t matter as long as you are both pursuing and connecting with the other in every way: spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically. This requires ongoing vulnerable conversation.
- Pursuers, you should assume that initiating sex is going to be your responsibility most of the time. Be direct. Be realistic. Be solid.
- Responders, do what it takes to open your mind, heart, body and soul to the benefits of connecting in this important way with your beloved. Recognize what it would mean to your spouse for you to initiate something sexual once in a while.
We referenced this interesting option for helping initiate sex: LoveSync app
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Download our free resource titled, What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?
at our website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode we’re talking about maintaining your sexual relationship during the stress of the holidays.
- Protect your spouse. Make sure they know that you’ve got their back when you are at family gatherings.
- Prioritize your spouse and your relationship. You absolutely MUST make time to continue to connect with your spouse, even at the expense of making others happy - including your kids.
- Plan ahead so that you are prepared to overcome challenges to your sex life during this holiday season.
Download our free resource titled, What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?
at our website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits: Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
Matt & Jenn discuss how to develop a vocabulary and language for your lovemaking so that you and your spouse can effectively communicate about your sex life.
- Talking about sex improves the quality of your sex and your relationship.
- You must have vocabulary to learn a language. Know and name your parts.
- Define the types and kinds of sex that you are having.
Helpful Resources referenced in this episode:
- Ultimate Intimacy app
- Intimately Us app
- www.ChristianFriendlySexPositions.com
Download our free resource titled, “What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?” at the website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions topodcast@intimatecovenant.comThanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.comIntimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In response to listener email, Matt & Jenn discuss the unique dynamic when the wife is the one with higher sexual desire.
- Higher desire wives, recognize that you are normal. You and your spouse don’t have to fit the stereotypes to still have a fulfilling sex life. You do still have to work at your relationship - just like everyone else, just in a different way.
- Wives, You can only control you. Choose to be a sexually confident woman. What you do may or may not influence your husband to change. But, even if you just change your behavior and your perspective, your relationship will still be better.
- Husbands of higher desire wives, You don’t need to have a high desire for sex to be a man, but you do need to deal with whatever is getting in the way of your wife’s sexual fulfillment. if you’ve got issues that are interfering with your relationship (porn, anxiety, unhealthy coping mechanisms, health problems, etc.) — Be a man and deal with your stuff. And if you’ve dealt with YOUR stuff, then own your responsibility to grow your relationship in all areas of intimacy: spiritually, mentally, emotionally AND sexually.
Download our free resource titled, “What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?” at the website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions topodcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
Matt & Jenn discuss the typical pattern of female sexual desire and arousal. "Normal" is not what you've been led to believe!
- Tapping in to sexual desire is a choice! Female sex drive starts in between her ears not in between her legs. Most women are not sexually aroused until AFTER they have chosen to engage in sexual play with their beloved.
- To have great sex, you must choose to be present mentally and physically, own your own pleasure, and understand what really makes you sexy.
- This is Biblical! We have a God-give example of a sexually confident woman whom we should emulate!
Download our free resource titled, “What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?” at the website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions topodcast@intimatecovenant.comThanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
Matt & Jenn discuss the five reasons people seek or avoid sex.
- The 5 motivators toward or away from sex are: pleasure, intimacy/connection, procreation, approval, and coping. Each motivator may be driving you toward or away from sex.
- Understand what motivates you toward or away from sex so that you can tap into your positive motivations and confront those negative motivations.
- Have a discussion with your spouse about each other's positive and negative motivation for sex. Find out what you can (or can’t) do to maximize your desire toward each other.
Download our free resource titled, What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse?
at our website: www.intimatecovenant.com
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.comThanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
This episode brought to you by: Websites That Sell: https://www.facebook.com/BeautifulWebsitesThatSellThey did a beautiful job with our site re-design. Let them make help you grow your business with a beautiful new website.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the devastating effects of pornography on your marriage and how to heal from the betrayal.
- Pornography poisons your sexual expectations and betrays your marriage relationship.
- Recovery from the betrayal of pornography occurs in three stages:
- Stage 1: The porn must stop. Period. Get accountability. (Helpful Resources: www.covenanteyes.com)
- Stage 2: Confront the harmful beliefs, habits and behaviors that have supported the porn use in your past and in your relationship.
- Stage 3: Rebuild Trust, Intimate Relationship, and Sex
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions topodcast@intimatecovenant.comCherishing,
Matt & Jenn
www.intimatecovenant.comIntimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Sign up for our next FREE webinar:"Making Married Sex Great Again"October 23 @ 8:00PM (central time)www.intimatecovenant.com/webinar------------------------------------------
Credits:Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
Matt & Jenn offer some very practical ways to build intimacy in the four realms of your marital relationship: spiritual, mental, emotional & physical.
- Intimacy is not just a euphemism for sex. It’s so much deeper. It means knowing and being known. Building intimacy is the goal for your marriage relationship.
- Building intimacy in all realms of your relationship requires an intentional focus and conscious effort.
- All of realms of intimacy — spiritual, intellectual, emotional & sexual — are interconnected. If your relationship is suffering in one area, it will affect your ability to grow close in every other area.
Sign up for the FREE webinar: October 23 -- Making Married Sex Great Again
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions topodcast@intimatecovenant.com
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
www.intimatecovenant.comIntimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
Matt & Jenn share some joy from the 2020 Marriage Retreat by playing excerpts from the live Question/Answer session. Experience a little piece of the atmosphere and the fun that we have at the Retreat!
Shout out to some of our Retreat Sponsors:Married Dance
GhostSherpa
Websites That Sell
- Check out our new website. (Get a free PDF)
- Sign up for the webinar, October 23
- Make plans to join us at the next Retreat: September 23-25, 2021
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions topodcast@intimatecovenant.com
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
www.intimatecovenant.comIntimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss how to broach the delicate topic of sex with our spouses. How can I get this conversation started so that my spouse will be responsive an engaged, not scared away? How can I learn to express my desires and feelings openly about such an embarrassing topic?
- Embrace the conflict. Use it as an opportunity to learn about what your spouse really needs, wants, and fears. Learn who they really are and how you can better serve them. Pursuers and Responders, lean in to the beauty of “I don’t know.”
- Timing is everything.
- Be direct. Avoid criticism. Be patient.
Sign up for the upcoming FREE webinar on October 23rd at 8:00PM: www.intimatecovenant.com/webinar
Thanks for listening! Please send your comments, questions and suggestions topodcast@intimatecovenant.com
Cherishing,
Matt & Jennwww.intimatecovenant.com
Credits:Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
Matt and Jenn discuss the biblical principles that should guide what we allow into our marriage bed:
(This one is a little longer than other episodes, but we just couldn't leave anything out from our discussion.)
- God loves Sex. He created it and intends for married couples to enjoy it.
- His word, the Bible, guides us with clear principles to determine what sexual activities are holy, healthy and edifying to our marriage.
- We are to have sex only in marriage (Genesis 2; Matthew 19.4-6; 1 Corinthians 7:1-16)
- We are expected to lovingly meet the legitimate sexual needs and wants of our spouse. Sex is intended to be pleasurable to both the husband and wife. (1 Corinthians 7.3-5)
- Love for our spouse, and respect for the body and soul God created, requires us to avoid anything which can cause harm: physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually. (Ephesians 5.29-33; 1 Corinthians 6.18-20)
- We should never push our spouse to compromise their conscience. (Romans 14)
- We should not be controlled by anything. (1 Corinthians 6.12-14; 10.24)
- One important question you must consider before introducing anything into your marriage bed is: Does this desire foster oneness and closeness in my relationship?
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions topodcast@intimatecovenant.com Sign up for the FREE webinar: www.intimatecovenant.com/webinar
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
www.intimatecovenant.com
Credits:Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
Matt & Jenn continue the discussion of sexual relationship dynamics between Pursuers & Responders. In this episode, we offer practical advice to help recognize, prevent and repair the damage from the toxic Pressurer-Distancer cycle:
- Responders: you can alleviate the pressure by closing the gap with small, comfortable steps and by communicating your needs. Withdrawing only makes the pressure more intense.
- Pursuers: Focus on the entire relationship and understand that it’s a journey. Practice gratitude and appreciation for what your spouse is already offering. Be a safe place for your spouse to share, grow, discover and be vulnerable.
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions topodcast@intimatecovenant.com
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
www.intimatecovenant.comIntimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
In this week's episode, Matt and Jenn explain the sexual pursuer/responder dynamic that occurs in every marriage. Understanding your role in this dynamic provides a framework to better discuss and resolve sexual conflicts in your marriage.
- Identify your role in the Pursuer/Responder dynamic in your marriage when it comes to sex (and other areas). Recognize that it’s not wrong or right to be either one, you just have to be the best responder or pursuer that you can be.
- When it comes to confronting sexual desire differences, understand that the conflict is usually not about who likes sex more or whether or not one spouse loves and cares for the other. Rather, you each have attached a different meaning to sex.
- Recognize the “toxic cycle” that initiates when a Pursuer’s advances are interpreted as “pressure” and a Responder reacts by “withdrawing.”
- Next week, we’ll discuss some practical ways to recognize the toxic cycle, how to avoid it, and how to repair the damage.
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions topodcast@intimatecovenant.com
Sign up for the 2020 Annual Marriage Retreat, September 24-26. Day Passes are still available: www.intimatecovenant.com/events/retreat
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
www.intimatecovenant.com
Credits:Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow
Matt & Jenn continue the discussion about how to talk to your kids about sex. This time they cover important conversations to be having as your kids reach certain age milestones:
- Sex education begins with language and anatomy at a very early age. This is the time to start to getting yourself comfortable with the conversation.
- Prepare your child for outside influences before they are likely to be exposed. A reactive response is never better than a proactive plan.
- Ultimately, your job is to transition from teaching to equipping. Establish yourself as a safe and reliable place to share and to discuss, instead of shame and judgement.
Thanks for listening! Submit your questions, comments or suggestions: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer - Daniel DeGarmo
Music - Jonathan Dow
Matt & Jenn talk about having "The Talk" with your kids:
- “The talk” is NOT sufficient to educate your kids properly about sex and their sexuality. Start the conversation now so that you become the trusted source for sex information instead of their peers, the internet, and Satan himself.
- Talk plainly and positively. Use real words.
- You can’t teach your kids what you don’t believe yourself. Becoming comfortable with your own sexuality is an important step in teaching your kids.
Jenn recommended two sets of books to help guide the conversation:
- God’s Design for Sex, by Stan & Brenna Jones (4-book series)
- The Sex Ed Series, by Luke and Trisha Gilkerson (3-book series)
Thanks for listening! Submit your questions, comments or suggestions: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Podcast Credits:
Announcer: Daniel DeGarmo
Music: Jonathan Dow
Do you know where your "poolally" is? Me neither...
Matt & Jenn discuss the importance of knowing your sexual anatomy, and your spouse's.
- If you hope to maximize your pleasure, and your spouse’s pleasure, you have to know where the parts are and what they do.
- Girls do have a vagina - but more inclusively and more importantly, girls have a vulva - with a clitoris.
- Claiming holy sexuality for your marriage requires uncovering the shame that Satan has dumped on you. Naming your parts is an important first step in this journey towards vulnerable, intimate, beautiful sexuality with your beloved.
Submit your questions, comments or suggestions: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer - Daniel DeGarmo
Music - Jonathan Dow
Matt and Jenn kick off this brand new podcast with a discussion about the very definition of sex.
- Broaden your definition of sex: change your language and your mindset
- Broaden your sexual experience to be sure that each partner is being blessed by sexual pleasure.
- Use sex as a gateway to closeness and oneness, not just orgasm or sexual release.
Submit your questions, comments or suggestions: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer - Daniel DeGarmo
Music - Jonathan Dow
If you’re new to our podcast, we think this is a great episode to start with. That’s why we’ve put it at the beginning of our podcast directory. Thanks for joining us. We pray that our story will bless your marriage.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share their personal struggles with marriage and sex. You won't want to miss this touching and vulnerable episode.
- We want you to know that you’re not alone. We know brokenness. But we also know redemption, restoration and unity through the power of the gospel and God’s plan for marriage and sex.
- We’re here to share that with you and to build a community for vulnerability and encouragement.
Register for the 2021 Annual Retreat in September: https://intimatecovenant.com/retreat
Please send your comments, questions and suggestions to podcast@intimatecovenant.com
Thanks for sharing, rating and subscribing!
Cherishing,
Matt & Jenn
PS — If you are interested in bringing Matt & Jenn to your church or small group to speak about the beauty of God’s plan for marriage and sexuality, please contact us: podcast@intimatecovenant.com
www.intimatecovenant.com
Intimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
Credits:
Announcer — Daniel DeGarmo
Music — Jonathan Dow