Fun Sexy Bible Time: Recent Episodes
Fun Sexy Bible Time
Matthew Pierce and Casey Haas lead an irreverent joyride through Christian culture and make a lot of adolescent jokes
(1:00) did you eat?(10:00) SNL Gold(17:00) NBA OG League(23:00) a look back at the tweet mashup generator(36:00) FSBT Would You Rather
(3:30) what's with the wet haired baseball players(16:00) the algorithm needs you angry, not horny(22:00) newsboys and y2k(35:00) would you rather
(1:30) fsbt collector's corner(7:00) chicken-based shoot the shoot(22:00) 10 things we know
(3:00) Push or Pull your shopping cart?(6:00) Elon(13:30) which athletes are hottest?(28:30) Matthew's gambling article(35:30) Casey's church thoughts
(1:00) has Casey been compromised by Big Education?(9:00) Matthew tries to spin Casey out with too many in-jokes(16:30) Faith-based movie pitch: Camp Eros
by Smalltown PoetsThere is Only You music video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=spf7LJnJbrE
(2:30) Is Casey old?(8:30) Casey reports on social media(18:30) Real Marriage(29:30) The Marriage Bed forums check out Casey's new post on our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/fsbt
(1:00) horny for food(8:30) old people and flip flops(15:00) robert duvall(25:00) judd apatow(37:30) would you rather
) joins us to laugh through religious OCD, purity culture silliness, weird youth group metaphors, and drowning in a sea of boobs. We promise, it's a lot of fun.Sophie's page: https://www.sophiekillingley.com/Her zine series: https://www.sophiekillingley.com/product-page/biblical-boob-zines
(0:30) reacting to the Phillip Yancey news(11:00) New Years resolutions(18:00) Billy Bob Thornton nude scenes, or something(30:00) Casey's imprecatory Psalms(40:30) DreamHaas
(2:00) Natty or not? (11:00) Danny's Christmas wish(14:00) Irons(21:30) FSBT Sexual Stapler Content(30:30) Generational despair(41:00) DreamHaas
(1:30) future podcast ideas(8:15) new segment: Matthew's Worst Take Imaginable(17:00) modesty(20:00) Grown Up Christmas Lists(36:00) A serious thought about ideas and tribalism(52:00) Christmas cookies
(1:00) We have an actual serious conversation about parenting(25:00) FSBT Update(38:00) Cursed hills vs. Lonely hills(48:00) Antiques Roadshow
(0:30) why is the price of ice going up?(8:00) parenting and candy(14:30) checking in on Desiring God(33:00) erotic hallmark movie pitch: Whispers of the Heart
(1:00) Casey on men in big trucks(9:15) Matthew's rebrand article(22:30) a curious Hallmark movie Facebook post(31:00) fake Hallmark erotic movie: Christmas Nudes(50:30) Kristen Bell and premarital sex
(6:45) Casey on gym cleavage(18:00) Sling blade, Billy Bob Thornton is a shapeshifter, phobias(40:00) Wright family film update(44:30) Chrisagii lore
(4:30) track 4 (16:00) track 3(22:00) track 2(29:00) Casey performs Matthew's high school poetry(36:00) track 1
(6:00) We talk about grocery prices(13:00) can you cover an R-cup boob with a pizza box?(19:30) HOT TAKE: Jimmy Carter wouldn't have been on Epstein's Island(23:00) Casey flames a random movie from 2007
Winding down our journey through the epic mixtape of rejected CCM demos from yesteryear:(2:00) Track 7(11:30) Track 6(24:00) Track 5
(5:00) Casey should write more(9:30) what is the national debt, anyway?(14:30) what is wrong with free solo climbers?(20:30) words: scrotum and vulva(29:00) Matthew should meet this tall guy or whatever
(5:00) Track 11(14:00) Track 10(19:00) A cancel reversal on yellow fever(25:15) Track 9(35:30) Track 8
(1:00) Casey's mom and other random life updates(19:00) Matthew's John MacArthur article(31:00) worst Colbert replacements
(3:00) Casey talks about a think piece that has her riled up(21:45) CCM Demo 1(33:00) CCM Demo 2(39:00) CCM Demo 3(48:45) CCM Demo 4
We react to four more rejected CCM demos from the 80s/90s(4:30) song 1(15:00) song 2(24:30) song 3(36:30) song 4
(0:00) Future Matthew discusses the Tait apology(12:00) Moth balls, revolving doors, water trucks, and death: Casey weighs in(23:30) The Michael Tait and Sean Feucht scandals
Someone sent us a collection of rejected CCM demos from the 80s/90s. We listen to them for the very first time, and react live!(11:30) song 1 (20:30) song 2(31:00) song 3(40:45) song 4(50:50) song 5
(1:00) uh, sunning buttholes(7:00) life coaching(12:00) vigina(17:00) who is Casey better than?(32:00) Matthew got into trouble on Easter(42:00) Casey's life update
Casey is still out, so friend of the podcast Hunter tags in to talk CCM and other stuff:(1:00) Matthew's panda joke(6:00) CCM song credits, remakes(22:30) Rich Mullins (37:30) the CT Easter article(50:00) Sonseed, unique CCM actsThe Resting Place: https://open.spotify.com/track/7eIjAyBaIjr0S9O7A0DZJU
FSBT family member Bekah subs for Casey today. Welcome back, Bekah!(0:30) an update on Casey(7:00) Proverbs 32 (12:30) decoding an alarming facebook post(27:00) Wikipedia Exchange
(1:00) retirement?(7:00) sports update and parenting(19:00) don't dilute a man's pine sol(28:00) you don't think that's giving cringe? drama(34:30) jackie kennedy(45:00) a curious email(55:00) we included the post show audio about hot chicken restaurants to showcase one (1) excellent wiener joke
(13:00) that whole patriarchy hannah thing(24:40) shaving your legs(29:00) SNL 50(34:00) pitch: "SNL Classic"(41:00) Walmart's bougie brand(49:00) Cobra Kai
(2:00) Casey's random thoughts(22:00) Grammy fits(33:30) real or fake: CCM band edition(49:00) FSBT Would You Rather
(5:45) Hot take: pardons are good(10:00) Casey on Instagram, feedback, parents(33:30) Matthew on Andrew Tate
(0:30) uh, so this is 10 years?(8:00) checking in on Christian Twitter(13:00) sports drama(17:00) Matthew's mic dies, kinda. We forge on with the backup audio. Sorry!(29:00) Faith based movie pitch: Sacred Hearts
Friends of the podcast David and Stefanie join us to spend an entire episode dissecting a faith-based film about Christmas, zombies, cookies, and...uh...New York cheesesteaks?watch "Christmas Zombies" here, free: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=12yU1i0p1Uk
(1:00) Winter Jam ticket/sexual favor inflation(11:00) Casey checks in on Reddit(19:30) Pierce/Haas Sports Update(29:30) Thanksgiving food
(3:00) Someone is flirting with Matthew, kinda, but not really(11:30) the election is over or whatever(24:00) dilemmas of sports parents(38:00) Mean Creek and movies that hurt
(0:00) pre-show audio(6:00) Russell Brand's amulets and vegetables(23:30) $5,000 to eat dinner with Allie Beth Stuckey?(33:15) Proverbs 31 rabbit hole(41:30) Would You Rather(54:15) Durupinar site (rock vagina)
(7:00) Casey's volleyball questions(18:00) The article about Rich Mullins' sexuality(36:15) Russell Brand baptizing people(40:15) Game of Thrones, reconsidered(49:45) Werner/Arnold/Peter Lorre, it's weirdRich Mullins article:https://medium.com/belover/the-queer-love-of-rich-mullins-f14170612b63
(4:30) Casey wants to smoke, again(10:30) Jogging(13:00) Caffeine free Coke(18:00) Would You Rather(30:00) Casey's Birthday Movie: For the Birds(46:00) Bigfoot
Casey and Matthew welcome longtime podcast friend Hunter in to dissect the movie "The Badge, the Bible, and Bigfoot"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVXMn9mBciE
(0:30) pre show audio(8:00) cleaning tips with Casey(18:00) real or fake: Olympic prizes(30:00) DreamHaas(41:00) why aren't famous actors better?(51:00) Olympics for parents
(0:30) Casey on social media(5:30) The Solomon rap returns! Part 3(14:30) Shoot the shoot (Olympics, Mr. Rogers)(28:00) CCM Video Breakdown: "Written on My Heart" by Plus Onehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IU2_DuNjvI4
(1:00) that Hawk Tuah think piece on Christian Twitter(16:00) Matthew convinced Casey to watch the new Katy Perry video(31:00) musing on Trump's close call
(0:00) pre show audio: AI Jan Crouch and running bleachers(12:00) Kyle Filipowski saga & crazy eyes(25:30) Casey's grab bag of topics: showerheads, Ross, seat belts, exercising, and pastors(58:00) politics or whatever
(4:00) Answering Canada Laura's impossible question(16:30) Casey's went to the Switchfoot Bro-Am(29:00) Matthew reads Christian culture AI
(1:30) Casey's word: caterwauling(6:30) FSBT confessions: trees, blood type, and prairies(23:00) self check outs(31:00) social media and grief/empathy
(8:00) Terrence Howard(18:00) Matthew on Joe Rogan and Art Bell as male safe spaces(34:00) FSBT Would You Rather
(0:30) fighting fascism(3:00) podcast mom: delete your bad tweet (10:00) weddings are dumb, hot girl energy, etc(30:00) breaking rules(35:00) kids waking up/bad dreams(41:00) social media check in(44:00) algorithm check in
(0:30) that whole "kids are bad" thing or whatever(11:00) weird straws(14:30) what is the ceiling for women's sports?(29:00) christian conferences(37:00) HAPPY MARRIAGE, BEKAH & CURTIS!!!
(1:00) Sly Stallone is too pretty(5:30) Casey's shoot the shoot (top sheets, Chick fil-A gift cards, price matching, Tiger Woods abstinence, and Gadsden flags)(27:30) Matthew makes fun of Jason Sudeikis(33:00) CCM Video Breakdown: Dance or Die by Family Force 5(video)https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qB9TCFIAUCM
(1:00) Tipping(10:00) FSBT Update(25:00) Casey reads angry comments to Matthew(31:00) Shoot the Shoot (easter, play by play announcers, children of assassination, Sixpence)
(4:00) Casey's King Tut costume(12:00) Shoot the Shoot: Kate Middleton, Dollar Tree, Alabama Football(38:30) FSBT Would You Rather
note: Danny said to leave the joke in the beginning, so we did uh, clarity(3:00) Danny is awesome(11:00) Shoot the Shoot (tiny butts, Rachel Dolezal, donuts, and self care)
(0:30) the pre-show audio was funny, so we left it in, that's what she said(10:00) casey's dumb question: easy open cans(17:00) dad confessions(37:00) america's five year itch for curves, or something(42:30) is danny a wars guy now?show patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MatthewEPiercejason kirk's new book: https://www.amazon.com/Hell-World-Without-Jason-Kirk/dp/1735492647/
Back from (unintentional) sabbatical with a two-part extravaganza! In part one:(7:00) Casey talks about Jason Kirk's book "Hell is a World Without You"(22:00) We sort through the latest batch of incredulous replies to Matthew's butt article
(3:30) FSBT Update(10:00) Movies that hit differently when you're an adult(29:00) Thoughts on the Babylon Bee's latest quasi-controversy
(1:00) is casey actually the modern proverbs 31 woman?(10:30) little moments that make marriages work(30:30) christian tweet of the year selection special!
(4:00) biblical analogies to the 2023 iron bowl(7:00) tooth & nail mount rushmore(14:00) jason's new book, Hell is a World Without You(47:00) who said it: college football coach, or megachurch pastor?(59:00) grown up christmas listsjason's book: https://www.amazon.com/Hell-World-Without-Jason-Kirk/dp/1735492647/
(1:30) casey gives matthew a horrible marriage quiz (11:30) shoot the shoot:-brian johnson, again-sex toys at cvs-church in movies/tv-some guys need a band(44:00) eat something(46:00) casey's end of year calendar complaint
(1:00) Casey attempts to give Matthew a quiz and we only get one question done(11:00) FSBT Update(20:00) Christian Tweets(40:00) Casey takes a break/ Matthew monologue/ Casey comes back?
(3:00) Matthew surprises Casey with a quiz(12:30) shoot the shoot(28:30) Hot Girl Energy
NOTE: one of our primary audio files from this recording was corrupted, undoubtedly sabotaged by one of our theological rivals. To create this episode, we had to use our backup audio, which is all on one track and harder to edit. Sorry for the occasional cough if we were in charge(18:00) casey on her For You Twitter feed(31:00) faith based movie pitch: COURTING DISASTER
(1:30) fsbt update(10:00) shoot the shoot (air shows, celeb confusion, lauren boebert, sexy costumes)(29:30) sound of freedom guy scandal
(0:05) Bekah's birthday greeting, and Roman stuff (7:30) FSBT Update (16:00) 7th Heaven table read (24:00) Would You Rather (37:00) Fashion, bumper stickers, mullets
(3:00) Matthew's rebuttal to the previous episode(13:00) FSBT confessions(19:30) 7th Heaven(40:00) Would You Rather
Canada Laura jumps in for a still-recovering Matthew and talks with Casey about confessions (2:00), Matthew's list of topics for Casey (15:30), and the Barbie movie (27:45)
(0:30) some sad news: R.I.P. to one of the Chrisagii. We reflect on their presence in this podcast's history (18:45) faith-based movie pitch: "Hardened by Grace"
(1:30) FSBT Update (14:30) What is the algorithm selling us? (28:30) Podcast Mom (40:00) Youth group summers
(0:30) more twitter trollery (7:00) fake accents, Con Air (15:30) smoking: disgusting but also kinda hot (25:00) ccm video breakdown: Love, Liberty, Disco
Newsboys Love, Liberty, Disco video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bSrPxwyH2oo
(0:30) Regis Philbin stops by to talk about bagels (05:15) FSBT confessions: things that we don't know how they work (26:30) Faith-based movie pitch: "Call of the Heart"
(0:30) Casey on leveling up your sex game as a parent of teens (5:30) Matthew on marital vetoes (14:30) the Scream franchise/cosmetic surgery, the classic intersection (30:00) Christian Tweets
(0:05) casey on mothers and mother's day(14:00) takes of the week: ja morant, miller lite, wnba pregnancies(29:30) ccm video breakdown: "God is Exalted" by Carman"God is Exalted" video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6LJhJP8C-DU
(0:30) a full-body orgasm at the classical music concert?(9:00) do we trust fitness instructors who don't sweat?(15:00) the celebs are at it again(30:30) ccm video breakdown: "more to life" by stacie orrico"more to life" video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2MvzgefsfKEsupport the show at https://www.patreon.com/MatthewEPierce
Hey, good thing we recorded a whole episode and totally forgot to talk about Amy Carlin's amazing special music, "Pray For Me," which runs at the end. Other than that, just a basic episode: Casey talks about why she doesn't necessarily want to prolong her life (1:00), and we break down Shonlock's "Something in Your Eyes" (8:00)"Something in Your Eyes" video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZiUtNcJKQ2ISupport the show on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MatthewEPierce
(1:30) shoot the shoot(19:00) casey on replies to matthew's tweets(33:00) would you rather(44:30) mad libs
We head to Twitter Spaces to record a live episode touching on intimacy challenges, askew replies to Matthew's tweets, and a CCM Video Breakdown of Steven Curtis Chapman's "Lord of the Dance." Also: Ohio Laura stops by for a surprise cameo!"Lord of the Dance": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iuX7pzQRI_ksupport the show on patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MatthewEPierce
(0:30) what are things we enjoy that our spouses don't?(16:00) ccm video breakdown: love addict"Love Addict" by Family Force 5: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ccNIjWcAnAsupport the show on patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MatthewEPierce
(4:30) talking Christians, weed, and prohibition(23:00) CCM video breakdown: Gather at the Riverspecial music by amy carlin: "Still Listening""Gather at the River" video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4UYXTggOkxksupport the show at: https://www.patreon.com/MatthewEPierce
(0:30) OnlyFans school volunteer lady(13:30) wannabe immortal rich guy(27:30) CCM video breakdown: "The Basics of Life"special music by listener Jessica4Him "The Basics of Life" video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zZ3fm9nOUkYsupport the show on patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MatthewEPierce
note: one of our audio files got corrupted on this episode and we were forced to use the backup audio. we blame Twila Paris Christian Tweets(30:00) youth group skits
(8:00) matthew's idea for unruly sports parents(13:00) bucchal fat removal(19:30) grave digging ethics(23:15) matthew's idea for a point break sequel(34:00) casey's real or fake headlines game(54:00) more point break sequel ideas
(5:15) shoot the shoot(22:00) nick adams' tweets(36:30) the christianity today book awards game
(0:10) Casey reads a collection of tweets from people who think Matthew's writing is serious(21:00) drafting the semifinalists for 2022 Christian Tweet of the Yearspecial music: "The 12 Days of Christmas (purity culture version)" by Amy Carlinsupport the show for as little as $1/month at https://www.patreon.com/MatthewEPierce
(0:15) 0-0 world cup games (5:00) shoot the shoot (we don't know how area codes work) (20:00) fsbt gratitude
(6:00) naming casey's substack (7:00) fsbt update (12:00) God Forbid, the falwell documentary (27:00) grown up christmas lists
special music: "If I Stand" by Rich Mullins, performed by Amy Carlin
(1:00) fsbt update (13:00) christian twitter talks about nutting out (19:00) burn takes
(1:00) Casey on linen sheets (17:00) real or fake: Desiring God (29:00) CCM video breakdown: Jesus Freak
SPECIAL MUSIC: Amy and Niles Carlin, "The Other Side of Me"
DC Talk: Jesus Freak https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kbB0QrBIs9k
(2:00) shoot the shoot [punching shower curtain rods, etc] (24:00) what are we listening to? (32:00) christian tweets
While the Haases are busy fighting off viruses and hurricanes, Matthew and Kendra do a standalone episode talking about the first 5 seasons of the Netflix show "Cobra Kai."
-How old is Kyler, exactly? -Extroverts are slimy -Why does Johnny look so embarrassed when he eats? -Is money real? -Who is the worst character, and why is it Sam?
(Spoilers abound)
(1:30) thumbs, etc (don't ask) (9:00) would you rather (19:00) height takes and football (28:00) faith-based movie pitch: BOSOM BUDDIES
closing music "Arms of Love" by Amy Grant, performed by Amy Carlin
(0:00) Jay from Lincoln's rebuttal to Matthew's Nebraska rant (7:30) Judge Casey: sketchy foods (24:15) What is going on with Matt Chandler?
(2:00) Desiring God and beards (5:00) Judge Casey: husband pet names (20:00) Matthew's 90 seconds of randomness (26:30) Casey's theology journey (44:00) tweets from The Marriage Bed
(1:30) Judge Casey: wife pet names (21:00) Haas family goes to school (25:30) CCM video breakdown: Shine
"Shine" by the Newsboys: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6vS4jXBVmsE Support the show on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MatthewEPierce
(1:00) Celebs and meat (5:00) Dane Cook, whatever (17:00) CCM video breakdown: "Cry For Love" by Michael W. Smith (45:00) Catty Roger Ebert quotes
Thanks to Amy for our ending music!
Cry For Love video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pxJTY733E6M Support the show on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MatthewEPierce
Casey clears out her list of random topics, including Taco Bell meal boxes, secret recipe snobs, and whether or not belly button shapes are genetic
(0:05) does the church actually shoot its wounded anymore? (3:30) how do we cope with division in the church? (13:00) faith based movie pitch: the unrepentables
(6:30) the chris rice situation (22:00) ccm video breakdown: "all we need" by out of the grey (46:00) matthew teases faith based movie characters
"all we need" video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6usMZ-mwfI
We debate which CCM songs make us cry, with a special intro by the Stone sisters.
CCM Sob Fest playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3fKyFeMXkmNPLjvtigvkJS?si=7aa32d9b86cd4f55
We read each other's horrible jokes and somehow only utilize the airhorn once. Also, we complain about our kids being fitter than us
(0:30) fsbt update (16:30) shoot the shoot [fitness modesty, weapons of war, teen voice]
(0:45) casey asks: why are sororities? (8:00) exploring the comments on matthew's substack (18:45) christian tweets (31:00) the celebs are naked again
(3:00) Casey asks: what is wrong with famous people? (17:00) height surgery (25:00) caedmon's call reunion (32:00) dril or piper tweet?
(0:00) fsbt head distiller Zach sets Matthew straight on a couple of things (1:30) are foot bones real? (6:30) fsbt update (18:00) little house on the prairie (24:00) would you rather (37:00) matthew saving dogs
(0:05) Matthew is Cheese Rich (11:00) Casey's weights story (14:00) Why is Casey Mad? (31:30) Would You Rather (40:00) Mad Libs
(0:00) Bekah pitches "Cosper the Ghost" (12:00) Casey's food questions (18:30) Matthew's best Casey moments (30:00) Christian Tweets
(4:00) 10 second impressions (8:30) Adidas and their boobs ad (26:00) faith-based movie pitch: Isabella
(1:00) from the desk of kendra pierce, fsbt ombudsman (7:45) housekeeping (13:30) casey's wordle rant (25:00) would you rather
(2:30) fsbt update (9:00) shoot the shoot (23:00) solomon rap, part 2 (31:00) christian tweets
(10:00) shoot the shoot -was anna from frozen brain damaged? -is bobby hill actually bill's son? -excessive hoodery (27:30) matthew interprets casey's dreams
Matthew and Casey draft the 12 semifinalists for the 2021 Christian Tweet of the Year.
To vote, go to Matthew's Twitter: https://twitter.com/MatthewEPierce
Cobra Kai's Housewarming: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/2KLDJZ11XY708
Matthew shares his thoughts on the final episode of the Christianity Today podcast "The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill"
(1:00) from the desk of Kendra Pierce (4:30) frogs (16:00) FSBT update (23:30) grown up Christmas lists
(2:30) from the desk of kendra pierce (7:30) canada laura painting giveaway (10:30) dreamhaas (30:30) shoot the shoot
(0:05) Casey and gold steaks; Matthew is perfect (7:30) FSBT update (18:00) Christian tweets (30:15) new Sara Groves music! (36:00) Girl Talk
(0:05) cap'n crunch (with ohio laura!)
(7:00) casey dissects the previous episode
(15:00) casey's random topics
(40:00) urban meyer
(1:00) dad power vs animals (9:00)creativity and the pandemic (23;00) overrated/underrated (46:00) saved by the belding
https://www.laurasmithbeauty.ca/ show patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MatthewEPierce seal video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SRupvfkOG70
Matthew is having a bad week, so Casey brings a slew of dumb questions and would you rathers to cheer him up
(4:00) colotis regina (9:30) casey birthday facts (13:00) christian tweets (47:30)matthew performs birthday wishes
does matthew know if dolphins are mammals or fish? does casey know if 60% is 2/3? unlikely on both counts. anyway,
(0:00) casey's buzzed monologue on dirty celebs (18:00) how do mermaids reproduce? (24:30) shoot the shoot (41:30) praise reports
(1:00) does casey have covid? (9:00) fsbt update (16:30) casey's stupid question (31:00) what is the algorithm selling you? (43:30) jeremy's holy rollers critique
(5:00) shoot the shoot (17:00) let people live (26:00) modesty (39:00) dreams (51:00) would you rather
(0:05) which "A Week Away" characters would work at Chick fil A?
(9:00) faith based movie pitch: Holy Rollers
(29:00) Girl Talk: talking to kids about God, strong willed girls, sex books, fear, and Sara Groves
opening music by joystock.org
Matthew and Casey spend an episode breaking down the 2021 faith-based musical "A Week Away"
FSBT Update (0:30) Shoot the Shoot (12:30) DreamHaas (29:00) Would You Rather? (47:30) Cobra Kai After Dark (1:04:30)
-that tweet about fighting geese (3:30) -casey on hotel bathrooms (17:30) -graduation tips (23:30) -marriage bed tweets (29:30) -10 second impressions (42:00)
Matthew is back to hit Casey with 10 second impressions (0:05). Then the WOW 2000 Showdown begins, with tangents into youth group mingle tracks, excessive Geoff Moore syllables, and Bebo Norman (9:30)
Vote for the showdown winner on the FSBT Twitter page @FSBibleTime
Bekah fills in for Matthew and helps Casey begin the episode with a segment called Where is Matthew? (1:00)
Then Casey fields some topics for Girl Talk, including Sara Groves songs, habits, and more (15:00)
Listener Zach delivers a pitch for a faith based remake of "What About Bob?" (0:05). Then Matthew rants about March Madness (11:30). Then Casey takes some Girl Talk questions about being tired and books (16:45). Finally, listener Amy plays us out with some piano music
Matthew and Casey draft their teams for the WOW 1999 showdown and talk about an iconic year in Christian music.
Also: should Casey tip at the grocery store?
Matthew leads things off with FSBT Update (0:05). Then Casey drops an extremely hot take on Dr. Seuss (12:30). Finally, we dive into the WOW 1996 compilation CDs and draft our teams for a song showdown (20:00)
PS> vote for the showdown on the podcast twitter page!
Matthew and Casey lead things off with FSBT Update (0:05). Then Matthew remembers Carman (12:00). Casey then hosts a quick installment of Girl Talk (24:00) and answers a question about bras. Finally, Casey live-edits another chapter of Matthew's upcoming book Evangelical Thought Leader (35:00)
Matthew and Casey open the show giving an homage to Norm MacDonald by performing "FSBT Update" (0:05). Later in the show, Casey debuts her new segment Girl Talk (30:00)
send questions/random comments for Girl Talk to Casey at fsbtcasey{at}gmail
Laura Smith (Canada Laura) calls in for the first segment to go in hard on children's books she hates (0:05). Then Casey talks about...uh...scrunchies (15:30) and argues with Matthew about ham (21:00). Then the Stone sisters tell us about the time they got kicked out of homeschool geography (29:30). Finally, we pitch our newest segment: Girl Talk with Casey (44:30)
Matthew and Casey attempt to wrap up the chaos from last week's episode (0:05). Then we do another round of Christian tweets (20:30). Finally, Casey live-edits a chapter from Matthew's upcoming book (42:00)
We dive into the recent brouhaha involving Dave Ramsey and his company's surprising email to journalist Bob Smietana (8:00) before Matthew winds up reading the email as Alex Jones (36:00). Finally, we cleanse the palate by playing Would You Rather (40:30)
Matthew and Casey! Matthew and Bekah! Listener Zach! It's an FSBT MEGASODE as we voyage across the FSBT multiverse, transcending linear time to bring you the following:
Listener Zach roasts Matthew and Bekah and challenges the show to address Janet Jackson's nipple (0:05)
Matthew and Casey talk about the fallout from the, uh, nipple fallout, whatever: (2:00)
Matthew and Casey get into arguments over toast, Brienne of Tarth being a klutz, and paper grocery bags in Shoot the Shoot (25:00)
For those who missed it, Matthew and Bekah appear from the past (the missing episode 161) to present the 2020 FSBT awards (59:00)
Casey talks about getting hit on by Tom Arnold and has some fun with it (4:30). Then Matthew introduces a new mega-batch of Christian Tweets (15:30). Finally, Matthew and Casey play a round of Rant Swaps that predictably goes off the rails (47:30)
Listener-submitted bad Christmas takes! (0:05) Then Matthew imitates various celebrities flirting with Beth Moore, before Casey shares some thoughts about Beth's Trumpism thread that got everyone talking (4:30). Casey gets attacked by a ghost? (26:00) Finally, Matthew and Casey goof off with their own bad Christmas takes (36:00)
Casey rolls out a series of increasingly hot takes for people who aren't sure what to buy their spouse (0:10). Then we drop a challenge to the listeners for bad holiday takes (17:00). Finally, Matthew introduces a new segment, wherein we have to perform the other person's grumpy rants (21:00)
Matthew and Casey are joined by Richard Clark to draft the nominees for the 2020 Christian Tweet of the Year voting. (Plus a couple of picks from surprise guests...)
Matthew and Casey go on a run of random topics for Shoot the Shoot, including men's grooming, parking lots, Creed, and then somehow get into a disagreement over Trump's Twitter (0:05). Then Casey leads a discussion on the Carl Lentz scandal (28:15). Finally, Matthew gives Casey a round of Name that CCM Christmas Song (43:00), and listeners are encouraged to try to beat her (very respectable!) score of 45
Matthew and Casey begin with an absolutely incredible rap sent in by listener Sean (2:00). Then Matthew unveils the Build Your Own Thanksgiving segment (11:30). Finally, Casey brings a round of CCM Name That Tune and all listeners are invited to try to beat Matthew's (very troubling!) score of 40.
link to Cobra Kai's pod: https://open.spotify.com/show/3wUU1Nh9qEu9mSZZV1WKYo?si=75kjCTcHRYiybHNsoB0Uww
Matthew begins the episode with an impromptu tribute to his high school basketball coach who passed away (0:05). Then we talk about which medicines taste the best (8:00). Then Casey leads the segment on listeners' dating questions (16:30) and we finish with a quick roundup of Christian tweets (53:00)
Casey brings another round of conversation starters in Shoot the Shoot (0:05) including movie snacks, chores, and zombies. Then Matthew fields a dating question from Bekah (17:00). Then Casey runs another intimacy article-based mad lib (20:15) before Matthew brings out his teenage writing for a game of finish the prompt (30:00)
FSBT intern Cobra Kai is on location doing man on the street interviews at Moody Bible Institute (0:05). Then Casey goes all in on her distaste for the 1997 film "My Best Friend's Wedding" (5:30). Then we play games! Would You Rather? (26:00) and mad libs (43:30)
Casey debuts a new segment: Shooting the Shoot (0:05), where we run through conversation starters like dream CCM lineups, how we would spend an unexpected $50, and pie milkshakes vs cereal milkshakes. Then we play a game of "guess my halloween costume" (28:30). Finally, Casey presents Matthew with a set of impression prompts, which turns into utter chaos (40:45)
Casey talks about her ongoing quest to get to 1k Twitter followers, it's fine, it's no big deal (0:10). Then we bring out a stunning new batch of Christian Tweets (13:30). Then Matthew gets weird about orange juice (34:45) Finally, we play a marathon game of FSBT Would You Rather (37:45)
Intern Cobra Kai checks in from college to rundown his latest hot takes on Cobra Kai the series (0:05), then Matthew gives marriage tips for wives (20:30). Then we sift through listener submissions for FSBT fake facts (33:30) before Casey is forced to help perform her own birthday play, CASEY HAAS: BOUNTY HUNTER (45:45)
Casey reacts to a tweet about cultivating sexual responsiveness (0:30), then we eventually dissect the Falwell situation at Liberty (13:00). Finally, Casey gives Matthew a youth pastor/smoking hot wife COVID challenge, which is way more fun than it sounds (35:15)
Matthew and Casey talk about WAP (0:10), then randomly discuss two episodes of the show "Step by Step" (8:15). Finally, they draft the teams for the Father Figure Showdown (23:45)
Intern Cobra Kai checks in from his professor's basement with a plan to wear a FSBT shirt at his Christian college without getting suspended (0:10). Then Matthew rebuts Casey's dumb Bible men segment with a dumb Bible women segment (16:00). Finally, Casey brings out some real or fake headlines (32:30)
Casey leads off with a sermon series on dumb men of the Bible (0:30). Then we talk Christian Tweets (13:00) and introduce the FSBT Prayer Chain (34:00)
Intern Cobra Kai pops into the show for a few minutes to report on his research into his nickname (0:05). Then Casey and Matthew go on a run of curated divorce photos (12:30), John Crist's comeback (21:00), and obscure impressions (40:00)
Casey returns to the show to give her rebuttals (0:30) and then we dive into drafting the field for the FSBT Cool Chick Showdown (12:30)
FSBT Canada Bureau Chief Laura fills in for Casey and leads the Where is Casey investigation (5:30). Then we play a game of FSBT Would You Rather (16:00). Finally, we talk about cool chicks in preparation for the Cool Chick Showdown (50:00)
(0:10) casey attempts to reclaim the phrase "white blessing" (10:00) writing prompts (31:00) Cool Guy Draft
Matthew returns to the show to offer his rebuttals to the all-lady episode 139, then we bring out a new segment: random writing prompts
Matthew is AWOL and Casey has replaced him with Jennifer Clark to talk about LADY TOPICS (1:00), bad pandemic self care (7:30), real or fake: Transformed Wife (16:00), and mad libs (29:00)
(0:10) Casey on Covid fatigue and Metaxas (13:00) Church children's ministries (27:00) Build Your Own Bible Study, round 2
(0:30) Casey's parenting rant
(21:00) Mother's Day postmortem
(37:00) Build Your Own Bible Study
(48:30) Liam Neeson at a Church budget meeting
(0:30) tv show pitches (6:30) elon musk's kid (21:00) tweet replies (23:30) real or fake (41:30) mad libs
(0:30) Name that CCM Tune
(21:45)offensive animal sounds
(32:30) FSBT Awkward Situations
(0:30) Casey's CCM pandemic playlist
(11:00) FSBT Awkward Situations
(32:00) FSBT Would You Rather
Also one of the Pierce family's pet crickets is in the background, periodically chirping in, do you get it because crickets chirp nevermind
Casey and Matthew pass the quarantine time by playing FSBT Name That Tune and Would You Rather, also Matthew has a weird rant about Pat Morita
Casey's AFV rant (0:30)
Horny Youth Group Games (11:30)
Coronavirus real or fake (26:30)
Birthday stuff (31:30)
BONUS: backup recorder post-show audio (45:00)
(1:30) Danny's inappropriate jokes (6:00) Ron Swanson isn't real (11:30) Matthew in youth group (15:00) horror movie ideas (21:30) real or fake: Richard Clark
(2:00) youth pastor billy bob thornton (3:45) casey has questions about matthew's homeschool crew (9:30) christian tweets (27:00) song generator
Matthew's basketball comeback (1:00)
Matthew and Rod Parsley in 2003 (5:00)
CCM Valentine's Day songs (19:30)
Would You Rather (34:30)
Casey catches Matthew off guard with an unexpected opener (1:00), then Matthew talks about CHRIST PRIME (8:00). Then we talk about Hooters vs Chick fil A (10:00)
Finally, we explore a selection of YouTube clips:
"Week Away" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-P21Eodtt7w
"AKA Public School" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bF9L3MSj5GQ
Gail Schuler: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whpZF9YdnRY
-Matthew's weird CS Lewis impression (0:30)
-Abstinence songs (9:30)
-Abstinence mad lib (33:00)
casey meets bekah (3:00)
inappropriate wordplay (10:30)
would you rather? (18:00)
real or fake: CASEY HAAS (27:30)
we sound...better (5:00)
casey's star wars rant (11:30)
real or fake: headlines (18:00)
christian tweets (33:30)
matthew goes youth pastor on casey (1:00)
casey's grown up christmas list (17:30)
christian twitter real or fake (29:00)
We welcome Richard Clark back to the show and the three of us draft the semifinalists for 2019 Christian Tweet of the Year
Recorded immediately after FSBT Movie Night, Matthew and Casey go into the darkness on every "It's a Wonderful Life" hot take they have, including
-WAS UNCLE BILLY REAL -DID MARY SLUT SHAME VIOLET -RASPBERRIES
FSBT AFTER DARK NOT LIVE FROM MATTHEW'S GARAGE IN ALABAMA AND CASEY'S BEDROOM IN FLORIDA
Matthew's decade (8:30) announcements (15:00) Real or Fake (20:30)
youth group name-off (1:00)
crossfire (6:30)
real or fake? (27:00)
dumb anger inventories (35:00)
-casey's voskamp tour (1:00)
-christian twitter (14:00)
-church judgement houses (33:30)
-halloween would you rather (43:30)
erotic baptism (1:00)
episode rebuttal (6:30)
covenant spice reviews (19:00)
moore vs macarthur (36:00)
Theological sex toys (1:30)
Is Matthew a big deal (12:00)
Tweet mad libs (15:30)
Light switch, cont'd (28:00)
Tweet replies (37:00)
Casey remains AWOL as she travels the country hanging out with CCM stars, so Pastor Rich is back on the show to wade through some pastor Would You Rathers, also we talk about exploding bosoms.
Casey is out of town on a top-secret undercover theology mission or something. So Matthew calls FSBT veteran Nate Claiborne to run through what's been going on in Christian Twitter
Matthew's inappropriate sermon titles (1:00)
FSBT Cancels stuff (7:30)
Abishag and David (28:00)
FSBT Would You Rather (43:00)
(2:30) Casey's inappropriate sermon titles
(11:00) Jarrid Wilson
(25:30) Covenant Spice product reviews
(35:45) Tweet replies
(41:00) Trump card arguments
Matthew begins the episode by giving Casey a morning devotion (1:30), followed by listeners' birthday wishes for Casey (4:30). Then, the episode devolves into QUESTION EXTRAVAGANZA (12:00), including random rants about Ruth (24:30)and Joab (33:00), and at various points Matthew and Casey bungle basic details of Bible stories. Finally, Casey does a classic rant on Kim Kardashian's shape wear (53:00)
-Why was Casey blocked by a stranger? We investigate (1:00)
-Is Casey being erased from the FSBT discourse? She weighs in (4:30)
-Inappropriate-sounding hymns! (7:00)
-Tweet replies (13:30)
-Matthew and Casey get serious for 9 minutes about masturbation and legalism (24:30)
-Are you married to a succubus sex demon? (35:30)
Matthew gives Casey a morning devotional in the form of a bizarre John Piper tweet (1:00), then special guest Bekah takes us into the world of Presbyterian stick dancers (7:00). Then Casey talks about being a youth group mom for the first time (19:30). Listener Laura has a question about naming children biblically (26:30). Matthew and Casey have a legendary fight over Jenny Gump (37:00) before ending the show by checking on the 2019 FSBT Student of the Year (48:30)
FSBT Canada Bureau Chief Laura checks in with a quick rant on special church music (5:00), then Matthew and Casey talk about discovering video of Joel Osteen's son preaching (14:00). Matthew brings a batch of Christian Tweets (24:30), then Casey brings a set of FSBT Would You Rathers (44:00)
Casey and Matthew talk through a recent tweet about grudges and apologizing (4:00). Then Casey leads into a discussion about Josh Harris (9:30). Then it's a belated Part 2 of Matthew & Casey's Guide to Getting Your Youth Group Crush to Fall in Love with You (23:30). Finally, Matthew performs a Voskamp and Casey brings some Transformed Wife tweet mad libs (40:00).
Matthew, Casey and Danny play a sex-ed board game sent in by a listener (3:00). Then Matthew goes into hot take mode on the Tom Hanks Mr. Rogers movie (28:00). Finally, things go completely off the rails when we discuss Mr. Rogers and intimacy, which is completely inappropriate, do not listen to this segment (37:45)
Matthew subjects Casey to a rant about Remember the Titans (8:00) which leads to an extended discussion on cinema, football, and bosoms. Then it's part one of Matthew & Casey's Comprehensive Guide to Getting Your Youth Group Crush to Fall in Love with You™ (24:30). Finally, a very frisky segment of Christian Tweets (42:30)
It's Ladies Night in the FSBT studios! Kendra is on the show and Casey picks her brain for Matthew's weirdest takes (4:30). Then Kendra talks about phallic staplers (17:00), then the ladies play FSBT Would You Rather (28:00). Finally, Casey temporarily lifts the troll embargo and brings up the latest Transformed Wife controversy (37:00)
Casey tries to make Matthew uncomfortable with an extended CCM playlist of inappropriate-sounding songs (1:30). Then Matthew talks about FSBT topics that will never make it onto the show (9:00). Casey leads a discussion on dad bods (16:00) before a round of listener comments (25:00). Then Matthew pays Casey five dollars to perform an Ann Voskamp facebook post (44:30). Also: staplers (50:00)
We made it to 100 episodes and at least 27 of them are sorta good! To celebrate, Casey begins with a story about donkeys (1:00), then Matthew and Casey take a few moments to be grateful for making it to 100 episodes (6:30). Next up, Casey has Matthew tell the story of almost being homeschool-graduated early (19:15). Then it's Bieber-Cruise hypothetical matchups (30:15) and Five Iron Frenzy pants song hot takes (with special guests!) (53:30)
Matthew and Casey confess to some Twitter chicanery (6:30), then read weird Tweets (10:00). Then there is a look back at the Platt/Trump controversy (20:30) before a round of FSBT Would You Rather? (26:30). Also, 16-year old Matthew thinking that marriage meant naked football.
Matthew and Danny take a weird path through Jon Foreman's hair evolution (2:30), a quick Game of Thrones postmortem (8:30), listener submissions for inappropriate ministry acronyms (15:00), then reading reviews for sex toys on a website for Christian couples (29:00), and finally some Star Wars talk (41:30)
Matthew delivers a horrible anti-church membership hot take (1:00), then we go all in on inappropriate ministry acronyms, do not listen to this segment (8:30), then we do a couple rounds of Twitter Bio Mad Libs (16:30). Finally, Casey talks about the issue of men laughing at women's jokes(41:00) which leads into a semi-serious discussion about pain and humor.
Jennifer Clark(!) joins the show to talk about seeing Chonda Pierce's new movie "Unashamed" (6:00). Then Matthew pulls Jennifer down the rabbit hole of Christian Tweets (20:00) and things quickly get random and inappropriate, with tangents about broccoli, Mike Huckabee, cuddling, and worst names for womens' Bible studies
Matthew and Casey ponder what could be on the Falwell photos (4:00), then Casey instantly ranks CCM compilation CDs (9:15), then Matthew discusses which Game of Thrones character would make the worst youth pastor (12:00). Then we talk about the recent spate of scold tweeting on Christian Twitter (14:00) before falling into FSBT Mad Libs (28:00) and all sorts of inappropriate jokes
Casey grills Matthew on his Garden of Eden takes (1:00), then talk turns to Christian Twitter drama (4:00). Matthew talks about picking up old ladies (9:00), then Casey brings up excessive PDA in church (16:30). Then Casey and Matthew play alternating FSBT Would You Rather? (24:30) before Matthew pitches the faith-based sex comedy Dude, I Banged My Wife (38:00). Matthew closes the episode with a truly awful Bernie Sanders impersonation (55:30)
Pastor Rich returns and is immediately subjected to Pastor Jimmy Stewart (2:30), then Matthew gives Rich an impossible theology question about Eden (5:30). Then the guys work on a faith-based movie about homeschoolers going back to high school (28:30)
Matthew and Casey handle some FSBT housekeeping (1:00) before Casey talks about the preachers' sneakers Instagram account (13:30). Then we check in on Christian Twitter (35:00) before going through listener questions (44:30)
Matthew is back to do Christian tweets with Richard and Jennifer (9:00), then everyone shares stories of podcast failures, interspersed with Matthew and Richard doing impressions and Jennifer earning her FSBT stripes with inappropriate jokes
Casey and Danny advise young people how to schedule your wedding for the best anniversary sex (2:00), then they play the game Did Mark Driscoll Preach That? (6:30) Then Casey runs down Danny's recent inappropriate dad jokes (15:45) before things get surprisingly serious talking about the power of words (20:30). Finally, Casey details her run-in with a real-life homeschool sex machine (37:45)
It's Matthew's birthday and Casey is back to talk about poor people luxuries (3:00), then Casey brings an extended round of FSBT Would You Rather (16:00). Then Casey talks about a book she found on the evils of CCM (29:00). Finally Casey gives Matthew a birthday present: a surprise game of FSBT Mad Libs (46:00). Also, a grandfather clock keeps going off in the background every 15 minutes
Matthew and Kendra take a look back at the 1990 episode "The Big Lie" from Focus on the Family. Was Derrick actually cool? Was Nick hallucinating? Was George Ravenhill a metaphor for Christ? BUXOM FIGURINES. We cover it all.
Casey drops her pro-front hug take (3:00), then Matthew takes a (big surprise) contrarian position to the blowback against purity culture (13:00). Then it's time for Christian Tweets (22:00) and FSBT Would You Rather? (41:30). Then Casey talks about The Marriage Bed (43:30). Then we include the post-episode banter because it's good (52:00)
Matthew and Danny talk about homeschooling (10:00), then introduce some new FSBT slogans (15:00), then work out the plot for the faith-based hip hop film WORD OF LIFE (27:00), and finally Matthew goes out on a ledge with a The Office hot take (43:00)
Matthew and Jessica play KANYE OR PIPER TWEET? (8:30) then Casey calls in to discuss Jim Bakker (17:30), then everyone plays FSBT Mad Libs (36:00) also there are a lot of inappropriate jokes, no one should listen to this
Matthew and Casey start off with a dive back into Matthew's teen years with "twisty little things" (1:00). Then we read listener submissions for CCM Freak Songs (10:30), then Christian Tweets (21:30), then Can We Make Boner Slang Happen? (43:00), and finally a faith-based movie pitch for "Father Sean" (53:00)
Matthew and Pastor Rich lay out a CCM challenge for the listeners (7:00), which leads to a discussion of Entertaining Angels vs Jesus Freak, 90s pop/rock lyrics, and Rich's crush on Roma Downey (19:00). Finally, the guys pitch a faith-based blockbuster "Two Week Trent" (28:30)
Matthew and Casey draft the finalists for the 2018 Christian Tweet of the Year, plus Casey tortures Matthew with another round of FSBT Would You Rather...
Richard and Perk City invade the FSBT compound, bringing lots of strange Enneagram words that Matthew does not understand. The guys handle listener submissions, Christian Tweets, and Matthew pitches a faith-based movie. At one point, Richard hides in a closet.
Pastor Rich is on the show, kind of, and Matthew spends the episode trying to piece together the parts of their lost episode. Plus: listener submissions and bad impressions.
Casey and Matthew get to work on Josh Harris' latest apology (1:00), Casey's week-late rant about sexy dads carrying babies (5:30), THE MARRIAGE BED (12:30), Christian Tweets (33:00), and a story called "I Married My Best Friend's Dad" (41:45)
Matthew and Rich descend down a rabbit hole of Christian Twitter and come away with bruised bodies, hard decisions, and big messes.
Bethany from the No Chill Enneagram Podcast (Perk City to FSBT listeners) returns to the show to talk superheroes (2:30). Then Matthew recounts interrupting a bikini photo shoot with his family while on vacation (17:30). Then Matthew and Bethany work out the plot for a faith-based movie called BROTHER'S KEEPER (21:30)
Pastor Rich and Matthew go deep on Old Testament concubines (1:00), then Matthew pitches his faith-based movie TRUE LOVE WEIGHTS (15:30), and the guys get lost down a rabbit hole of impossible theology (38:00)
Matthew and Casey talk about Geoffrey Owens (5;00), then Casey goes on a rant about churches and breastfeeding (10:00), then we do FSBT Would You Rather (18:30) and Christian Tweets (28:00)
In 1998, Matthew wrote a horrible poem to his (then unknown) future wife and had it published in a Christian school yearbook. 20 years later, in Nebraska, Mike Wittmann found one of the yearbooks and sent the poem to Matthew. Now Matthew reads the poem to Kendra for the first time.
Matthew and Casey return for Christian Tweets (1:00), then Casey gets caught in a rainstorm, then magically arrives at her house in like three seconds (27:45), then Casey drags us all down a rabbit hole of Christian sex tips from The Marriage Bed (28:00)
Casey returns in a mini episode to try to reclaim her crown in FSBT Would You Rather. Also, pizza!
The Matthews discuss Christian trolls, Jars of Clay, and then settle in for an epic round of FSBT Would You Rather before ending on an inappropriate note
Matthew and Nate talk about Matthew's bad tweet (1:00), then spend the entire episode trying to name Paul Tripp's new sex book. Also, Nate tells a story about having lunch with Tullian Tchividjian (4:30). Then there is a round of FSBT Would You Rather (16:30). Finally, the guys talk about the Jonathan Merritt/Babylon Bee slap fight (35:00)
Casey and Matthew do Christian Tweets (1:00), then Casey springs a game of FSBT Would You Rather on Matthew (34:30), and Matthew debuts his Pastor Jordan Peterson impression (43:30)
Danny Haas is on the show to deal with the tough issues: did Mandy Moore ruin Switchfoot? (2:00) The Mt. Rushmore of CCM fat guys (7:30), Pop-Tarts (17:30), and random Star Wars takes (19:30)
Matthew and Rich talk about adult bookstores(2:00) and Matthew's juvenile engagement plan (9:30). Then the guys delve into an impossible theology scenario (18:30), solve absolutely nothing, and fall down a Calvin Coolidge rabbit hole (40:00)
Richard Clark tells the story of mistaking his FSBT check for a terrorist letter (3:00), then Richard gives Matthew a list of potential FSBT guests (8:30), the guys have a heated discussion over The Friend Zone (10:00), then things settle down for Christian Tweets (14:00) and a discussion on bad conference lineups (40:00)
Joel & Jessica Fitzpatrick from Front Porch with the Fitzes come on the show to break down the controversy over the Stronger Men's Conference (1:00). Elyse Fitzpatrick makes a 2-second appearance (24:10), and the Fitzpatricks discuss their upcoming book "Mom, Dad...What's Sex?" (24:30)
Casey is back on the show to explain her food takes to an apathetic Matthew (4:30) before unpacking the latest batch of tweets from Christian Twitter (9:00). Then there is a brief tangent about Matthew's inappropriate Veggie Tales tweet (19:30). Then Casey goes on an extended run of CCM takes (30:30), culminating in a passionate defense of Sara Groves, despite Matthew calling her a hipster.
NOTE: if you are offended by any part of this episode, you should have heard it before we spent 3 days editing it
Kathryn Watson(Relevant, Brit + Co.,) returns to the show and joins Matthew in getting woke about Black Panther without having seen it (1:30). Then the discussion turns to fear (9:00), Thomas Kinkade peeing on things (23:00), snakes (27:30), and that one time Kathyrn and Ashley Abramson rejected one of Matthew's think pieces for Upwrite Magazine (46:00)
Perk City confronts Matthew on his dual hatred of the Enneagram (3:00) and The Bachelor (21:30)and by the end of the show Perk diagnoses what Matthew's Enneagram is and Matthew slanders the Gilmore Girls. So, pretty much a draw?
Casey attempts to diagnose Matthew's hatred of hot dogs (1:00) before diving into another rabbit hole of inappropriate CCM topics (11:00). Then we address the latest John Piper controversy (28:00) and delve into another batch of Christian Tweets (37:00)
Rich and Jake from Theology After Dark reunite on the show and try to convince Matthew to re-release his horrible Christian comics (3:00) and then the guys talk about the intersection of Christianity and marijuana reform (17:00). Finally, Alex Jones explains things (32:00) and an M&M rant (36:30)
Was the Grinch a widower? Did the Whos in Whoville hunt Grinches? Is the earth flat? Lauren and Matthew address the pressing holiday issues of our time
Richard Clark, host of the CT podcast The Calling, joins Matthew to draft the 16 finalists for Christian Tweet of the Year
Rich and Matthew talk about fuzzy theology (1:30), which Christian speaker you'd want to speak at your funeral (14:00), Matthew's hatred of gingerbread houses (20:30), and brainstorming inappropriate CCM ideas (30:00)
Kendra and Matthew stay up late, eat a bag of donuts, and go through listener comments on thankfulness (2:30). before talking about whether people were allowed to have sex on Noah's ark (14:00) and what Lot's problem was (30:00)
Casey is back with another batch of Best Christian Tweets (1:00), then we talk about grocery store dads vs grocery store moms (23:00). Also there is a discussion of CCM sex tapes (35:30) and we will probably apologize for all of this in the next episode
Matthew and Cory devote an entire episode to the lost gem of 90s Disney movies, RocketMan
Matthew makes everyone uncomfortable by talking about hand puppets (3:30), then Shannan and Jessica make Matthew uncomfortable by talking about his blog (7:00). Then there are extended discussions about Pop-Tarts (11:30), Saved By the Bell (27:00), and CCM Mt. Rushmore (38:30)
Sarah makes her triumphant return to the show to talk about her new book "Women and Lust: Exposed, Forgiven, and Embraced" (4:30) and then debate Matthew on which married couple from the TGIF television shows was having the most sex (19:30)
Matthew and Nate ponder the Jay Cutler era for the Dolphins (5:30) and virtue-signalling about wives (10:00) before going on a nice long ramble about whether Bran Stark is a homeschooler and other Game of Thrones takes(14:00)
Matthew narrates a journey into the strange world of evangelist Joshua Mills, tracing his claims of supernatural gold dust back to a Brazilian woman and a Toronto pastor in the 90s. Then Casey Haas joins the show for a deep dive into the purpose of miracles (17:00), Joshua Mills' China transportation video (22:00), a curious Mills sermon (36:00), and the question of why some Christians support charlatans (43:00). Plus, bonus clips(55:00)
In 1994, evangelist Kenneth Copeland created and starred in his own faith-based cowboy movie. Adam and Matthew devote an entire episode to reviewing this strange and wonderful film.
Richard Clark from Christianity Today joins the show to evaluate Matthew's horrible pitches for faith-based video games (8:00), then talk Best Christian Tweets of 2017 (21:30), and discuss The Adventures of Pete & Pete (42:00)
Perk City (Bethany Perkins) joins the show for embarrassing teenage journals (5:00), Random DM Roulette (11:00), David vs. Cain (16:00). and ranking the sins (25:00)
Nate and Matthew discuss Adam and Eve's nipples (2:00), a snake invasion (4:30), sex on Noah's ark (11:30), Benny Hinn (19:00), Christopher Nolan's new movie "Dunkirk" (29:00), impersonating theologians (37:00), and which FSBT hosts would survive a wolf attack (41:30)
Matthew and Casey do a deep dive on the influential and mysterious fundamentalist blogger David J. Stewart (Jesus-is-Savior.com), with detours along the way to talk about pickles, kilts, and whether Matthew knows what adjectives are.
Matthew and Chris take a look back at some of their favorite "good" faith-based films, including The 10 Commandments (10:00), The Passion of the Christ (16:00), The Last Temptation of Christ (24:00), and The Apostle (36:00)
Matthew and Maggie carve a path of destruction through a slew of topics such as Trump/Hillary as homeschoolers (6:00), Bible verses about donkey dongs (24:00), homeschool apocalypse bunkers (31:00), and President Rock (34:00)
Author Erik Guzman stops by to talk about Benny Hinn (4:00), why televangelists get weird (19:00), the ups and downs of book writing (30:00), and who would win in a fight between Hinn and Steve Brown (38:00)
Lauren and Matthew spend an episode playing with a random question generator (8:00) before getting serious for a few minutes about idealization of marriage and children (40:00)
Kendra joins the show for a late night post-Easter rundown of 17 random topics, including Cadbury Eggs, hand soap, puking into wastebaskets, masturbation think pieces, and Pop Tarts.
Nate Claiborne returns to the show for a semi-serious postmortem on the Missing Richard Simmons podcast (2:00), a discussion of Jon Gosselin (22:00), and whether a Simmons/Gosselin reality show could work.
Jessica Thompson (Front Porch with the Fitzes) rejoins the show to talk about her upcoming book (5:00), and then the show falls down a rabbit hole of making fun of things in Christian culture (13:30), including random tangents on defending Josh Harris, praising the Chrisagis Brothers, and ranking Pop-Tarts.
Bethany Perkins (Perk City)joins the show to help make sense of the ongoing Christian culture tournament.
Mike Wittmann joins the show to break down the opening round of matchups in the Christian Culture Tournament
Matthew issues an apology for omitting several names from the previous episode's segment on inappropriate-sounding Christian names (3:00). Then Adam King joins the show to discuss his role in the book JV Superstar (7:00), talk about a haunted hill in rural Tennessee (23:00), being annoying at age 18 (34:00), and anti-masturbation bobcats (38:00)
Casey Haas returns to the show to discuss inappropriate church signs (4:00) before going on a deep dive on one of the oddest Christian music acts we've ever seen (10:00)
Matthew and Brad tackle the tough theological issues of the day, including phallic rock formations (4:00), post-election social media (8:00), and exactly how many Guy Code principles King David broke (17:00)
Author and podcaster Sarah Taras (Ezer Uncaged, Fundyland Sees Red) returns to discuss the rise and disappearance of the minister LaTascha Emanuel (2:00), Twitter beefs (18:00), the theology of sex robots (28:00), and the role of the Holy Spirit (34:00)
Kendra returns to the podcast and joins Matthew on a voyage to the outer realms of Christian culture to review an ebook called "The Erotic Baptism."
Author Nate Claiborne drops in to discuss the worst tweets Christian Twitter had to offer in 2016, and also snakes, the Miami Dolphins, and how many times Adam & Eve had sex.
Author Shannan Martin stops by to talk about her book "Falling Free: Rescued From the Life I Always Wanted" (6:00) and then we rank Jan Crouch's wigs (21:00), pitch a faith-based movie (23:00), and dare to question Dave Ramsey (33:00)
We (mostly) take a break from Christian culture to devote an entire episode to Star Wars and opossums. Chris Allen co-hosts and talks about building beds for the animals that sleep on his porch (3:00), then we discuss random Star Wars theories (8:00) before finishing with which Star Wars character would make the best youth pastor (35:00)
Kate Waston and Ashley Abramson from Upwrite Magazine come on the show to share the story of their magazine's inception. From there the episode breaks down into a random and frenzied jokefest about Christian culture. At some point, a faith-based movie about dinosaurs starring Mark Wahlberg is proposed.
Pastor and author Jon Quitt comes back to the show to talk about his new book (2:00), a discussion which leads into church plants (10:00), Billy Graham's legacy (11:30), which Bible person had the biggest poops (16:00), and youth group lock-ins (19:00)
Jessica Thompson (Front Porch with the Fitzes)returns to the show for an election postmortem (4:00), then we break down the brewing John Piper controversy (18:00), reminisce about Christianity's epic yoga pants war (28:00) and develop the plot for the faith-based movie GARDEN OF EDEN (32:00)
Maggie Talley joins the podcast to joke about homeschool and Christian school repression (8:00), then we talk spirit flags in church (16:00), fighting bears with our bare hands (21:00), and finally address the theological elephant in the room, Samson's body hair (31:00)
Mike Chavez comes back to the show to debate which Presidents were the least(9:00)and most (15:00) physically fit, and also talk about how he would defend his family against a giant alligator (24:00).
Kendra Adachi from The Lazy Genius Collective drops in and we devote an entire episode to the film Cool Runnings
Lauren R.E. Larkin arrives to coax Matthew out of hiding and bring the podcast out of sabbatical. Topics include creepy clowns (1:30), the ethics of sharing the gospel with nude creepy clowns (11:00), candy corn (14:00), Rahab (26:00), and Matthew's new ebook NAKED SIDE HUGS
Rich Cook returns for a late-night discussion of whether Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles can become Christians (9:00) and to weigh the pros and cons of relying on theologians for your beliefs (19:00)
Jessica Thompson from Front Porch With The Fitzes stops by for a podcast after dark and we quickly lose control of the proceedings. We talk angel wieners and trains to Bosomville (3:00), which celebrities we'd like to hear preach a sermon (10:00), butt sin (27:00) and Christian Pokemon (30:00)
Michael Chavez drops in to talk about homeschooling in the 90s (7:00), retrace the events of the book Homeschool Sex Machine (18:00), and talk about the strangest Christian school prom ever (30:00)
Lauren RE Larkin (Ezer Uncaged, Key Life, Mockingbird) drops in to discuss church pool parties (10:00), bad theology (16:00), and most importantly, DID RUTH SEX BOAZ? (30:00)
Kendra from The Lazy Genius Collective stops by to rank people named Chris (3:00), talk about all the things we were banned from in the 90s (13:00), which CCM artists could survive the zombie apocalypse (23:00) and why Matthew got blocked by Joel Osteen (36:00)
Casey Haas drops in to discuss Christian songs with inappropriate titles (7:00) and talk about what certain Game of Thrones characters would look like if they were Christian (21:00). Also: mints.
Nate Claiborne (NathanielClaiborne.com, Christ and Pop Culture)calls in while on the road to reminisce about Christian college, explore what ails the Miami Dolphins, and strategize how to survive a deer attack (spoiler alert: watch out for the antlers, baby)
Sarah Taras (Ezer Uncaged, Fundyland Sees Red) drops by to talk about whether there will be Chick-fil-A in heaven (7:00), pitch Saved By The Bell revival ideas (13:00), and talk about her upcoming book on women and lust (33:00)
Rich Cook from Theology After Dark returns to the show to talk about how ducks could conceivably kill an attacking predator (7:00), discuss which Bible figure would be most likely to have a sex tape leaked (16:00), and rank the overrated kinds of candy (27:00)
Wayne Watson drops by for a quick interview about his new album (3:00) and we manage to get him to hang around long enough to tell Rich Mullins and Carman stories (13:00) and give a unique perspective on modern worship music (16:00)
Jenn from the website Sweet T Makes Three calls in to discuss Chick Tracts (2:00), talk about Butt Sin and the purity culture (9:00), take turns pitching ideas for Christian romance novels (16:00), set up this episode's giveaway (28:00), and discuss punching zombie children in the face (31:00)
Mike Wittmann joins the podcast for a late-night discussion on whether Jesus misses shots when he plays basketball (8:00), Dad Skills (15:00), the greatest Dad Movies (26:00), and then Matthew and Mike blow each other's minds by pitching sequel ideas for The Sandlot (49:00)
Pastor Jon Quitt drops in to talk about his upcoming book and also to discuss punching alligators (6:00), bad mission trip ideas (15:00), The Sandlot (20:00), current scandals in Christianity (35:00), and nude football in heaven (49:00)
Lauren from Ezer Uncaged stops by to talk about pirates, whether or not she could defeat a large rattlesnake, Mr. T, and whether or not angels and human ladies were getting it on in Genesis 6.
Rich from Theology After Dark drops in to talk strategy in a hypothetical fight against a wolf, rank his favorite video games, discuss nude baptisms, and pitch ideas for a Christian horror movie.
Kendra makes her debut on the podcast to discuss her 90s crush on Michael W. Smith, Fuller House, and the theology of trying to share the Gospel with zombies.
Author Jessica Thompson stops by to talk about who should narrate an audiobook of Song of Solomon and things quickly get inappropriate.
Sarah from Ezer Uncaged drops in to help rank the best 90s shows from ABC's TGIF block, debate nude evangelism ethics, and reminisce about inappropriate hymn lyrics that made us laugh when we were 11.
Jake from Theology After Dark stops by to talk about which celebrity pastor would survive the longest during the zombie apocalypse, whether or not we could defeat a mountain lion in hand to hand combat, which presidential candidate would make the best youth pastor, and why Southern Baptists like gravy so much.