The Adoption Connection: Recent Episodes
Lisa Qualls and Melissa Corkum
We often get questions about whether teachers or other folks who interact with our kids can have blocked care. Or what about siblings? Also, can you have blocked care towards a spouse? Since we weren't the first ones to name blocked care, we went to the source. We are thrilled to bring you this conversation with Dr. Jonathan Baylin, author of Brain-Based Parenting and other works, and Jessica Sinarski of BraveBrains. Besides digging deeper in the science of caregiving, we also talk about the differences between primary and secondary blocked care and blocked compassion.
Dr. Baylin received his doctorate in clinical psychology from Peabody College of Vanderbilt University in 1981. While continuing his clinical practice, he has immersed himself in the study of neurobiology and in teaching mental health practitioners about the brain. Dr. Baylin has delivered keynote sessions at international conferences and has also given numerous workshops both internationally and regionally within the USA.
Jessica Sinarski is a licensed mental health counselor, educator, and award-winning author. She is also the founder of the resource and training platform BraveBrains. Jessica makes tough topics easier, empowering the healers and the cycle breakers among us. She lives in Pennsylvania with her husband and three busy boys.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksBrain-Based Parenting: The Neuroscience of Caregiving for Healthy Attachment* by Baylin and Hughes
Connect with Jessica on Instagram
Climbing Out of Chronic Stress (with printable cheat sheet)
FREE Blocked Care Assessment
*this is an affiliate link
Marriage is already hard, but add in parenting children with significant needs and blocked care, and staying married may seem impossible. In this episode, Lisa and Melissa answer two listener questions about marriage and blocked care with personal stories and practical tips. If you're not married, you'll still find insights you can apply to your close relationships with folks who love your family.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksFREE Blocked Care Assessment
Dr. Sue Johnson (Emotionally Focused Therapy)
Books by Dr. Sue Johnson*
- this is an affiliate link
We believe that overcoming blocked care is best in community. In this episode, we explore the power of community and compassion in the journey of foster care and adoption. Kayla North generously shares her experiences of blocked care and how support, self-care, and practical strategies can lead to resilience and healing. They also talk about how mom's found hope through attending Reclaim Compassion book clubs last summer.
Ryan and Kayla North are a dynamic husband-and wife duo who have dedicated their careers to helping adults create environments where children feel safe, welcome, and loved. Through their work, they have become trusted voices for parents, professionals, churches, and educators. They are Co-Founders of One Big Happy Home and the Empowered Parent Podcast.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksConnect with Kayla on Instagram
Free Reclaim Compassion Group Guide
Lisa and Amber Reynolds (our Director of Communications) chat about the challenges of parenting a young child struggling with mental illness. Amber shares candidly about what she wishes she had done differently, how her son's mental illness affected her health, and how she's overcoming blocked care. As an Enneagram 8, Amber loves advocating well for all those in her care. She and her husband, Chris, have been foster parents for seven years and have three children through adoption.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksConnect with Amber on Instagram
Join Reclaim Compassion
Generally, what we carry into our childhoods and throughout our adulthood is part of a wider series, even patterns, of behavior, traumas, and worldviews. In this workshop, Dr. Stoker will give a very brief overview of Family Systems theory. You will learn:
- highlights for Family Systems theory
- a narrative that will assist you in seeing systems more objectively
- tools to heal and offer hope for those with whom you live and serve
Dr. Andy Stoker (he/him) is married to Megan, and they are parents to two sons, Alex (20) and Wesley (15). Andy is an ordained United Methodist minister, holds a secular PhD in Family Science, and is a certified mindfulness meditation teacher in the Western Buddhist tradition. He currently serves as the Senior Pastor of Central United Methodist Church in Albuquerque, New Mexico. For over two decades, Andy advocated for justice, fairness, equity, and inclusiveness in the Dallas area in the areas of public education, fair employment, healthcare access, and housing justice. In his free time, he co-hosts a parenting podcast with a psychologist and pediatrician called “Parenting for the Present."
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksConnect with Andy on Instagram
Parenting for the Present podcast
Generation to Generation: Family Process in Church and Synagogue* by Edwin H. Friedman
Bowen Theory's Secrets* by Michael Kerr
The Bowen Center on Youtube
A Family Genogram Workbook* by by Israel Galindo, Elaine Boomer, and Don Reagan
*this is an affiliate link
Foster care and adoption are full of ambiguous losses and disenfranchised grief. In this episode, Lisa and Melissa discuss the gap between expectations and reality which can lead to feelings of grief. They offer tangible practices, including writing, verbal processing, and bodywork. The importance of acknowledging and processing darker emotions such as sadness, anger, or resentment without judgment is emphasized. Lastly, they mention adapting these practices for children experiencing similar grief and loss.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksReclaim Compassion: The Adoptive Parent's Guide to Overcoming Blocked Care with Neuroscience and Faith* by Qualls and Corkum
33: Grieving the unexpected losses in adoption
121: An Introduction to Trauma & Tension Release Exercise (TRE) with Christa Bevan
FREE Facebook Group
- this is an affiliate link
Rebekah Cook shares her experiences of fostering children of incarcerated moms through a ministry called Jonah's Journey. She emphasizes the importance of establishing a relationship with the biological parents and discusses the unique challenges and rewards of this type of foster care. Rebekah also touches on her struggle with blocked care and how she sought support and healing.
Rebekah is a stay at home mom and former elementary school teacher who is passionate about loving and serving vulnerable moms in her community. She and her husband, Josh, are parents to 7 kids through birth, adoption and foster care. They are also loving their newest roles as grandparents to two little ones!
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksJonah's Journey
One of the signs of blocked care is isolation. In this episode, Lisa and Melissa chat about the importance of building supportive communities in virtual and real-life spaces. They recommend parents seek out and engage in safe, validating communities where they can discuss their challenges openly. All parents need to fill up their "relationship bucket" in order to maintain compassionate parenting.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksJoin Reclaim Compassion
Join our free Facebook group
House of Eve*** by Sadeqa Johnson
- this is an affiliate link
This week we answer listener questions such as:
- What resources would you recommend for Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA)?
- Do you have any wisdom to share about parenting a teenager with borderline personality disorder?
- What if things don't get better?
Click here to download the transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksPDA Masterclass
Melissa's Ted Talk on Redefining Success
The Gap and the Gain Podcast
Many adoptive and foster parents wonder if their child may have FASD or they have a diagnosis but aren't sure what to do next. Last time Sandra explored the impact of prenatal exposure to alcohol on a developing baby and identify the primary, secondary, and tertiary symptoms of FASD. This week in Part 2, you will learn practical techniques for accommodating and supporting children with FASD.
Sandra Flach is a mom of 8 children, 5 through adoption—2 diagnosed with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. She encourages and equips foster and adoptive parents through her weekly Adoption & Foster Care Journey Podcast and blogs at SandraFlach.com. Sandra is co-founder of Justice For Orphans and author of Orphans No More: A Journey Back to the Father. She is also a trained facilitator of the FASCETS Neurobehavioral Model. Sandra and her husband Wayne have been married 35 years. They reside in upstate New York where they love to spend time with family, especially their 8 grandchildren.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksJustice for Orphans
Sandra's Blog
Orphans No More* by Sandra Flach
*this is an affiliate link
Many adoptive and foster parents wonder if their child may have FASD, or they have a diagnosis but aren't sure what to do next. In Part 1 of this workshop, you will explore the impact of prenatal exposure to alcohol on a developing baby and identify the primary, secondary, and tertiary symptoms of FASD. In Part 2, you will learn practical techniques for accommodating and supporting children with FASD.
Sandra Flach is a mom of 8 children, 5 through adoption—2 diagnosed with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. She encourages and equips foster and adoptive parents through her weekly Adoption & Foster Care Journey Podcast and blogs at SandraFlach.com. Sandra is co-founder of Justice For Orphans and author of Orphans No More: A Journey Back to the Father. She is also a trained facilitator of the FASCETS Neurobehavioral Model. Sandra and her husband Wayne have been married 35 years. They reside in upstate NY where they love to spend time with family, especially their 8 grandchildren.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksJustice for Orphans
Sandra's Blog
Orphans No More* by Sandra Flach
*this is an affiliate link
Last year's reflection episode was a listener favorite, so we're back with another one! With the demands of life and parenting, it can be hard to find time to stop and reflect. But pausing and reflecting is good for our soul, our nervous system, and our relationships. In this last episode for 2023 we thought it would be fun to answer the following questions:
- Describe a moment of clarity in 2023
- Name something that became newly important to you in 2023
- What is one new thing you want to explore in 2024
- What do I have right now that, five years ago, I only dreamed about having?
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksCentering Prayer MP3
Music for the podcast was composed by Oleksandr Oleksandrov on Pond5.
This week we answer listener questions such as: How do I prepare for every possible scenario and keep balance in...Continue reading
Join Lisa as she talks with Amy J. Brown about the journey of parenting children with special needs. We talk about the moment she realized her children's challenges were going to change her life and family forever. We talk honestly about guilt and shame as adoptive moms, blocked care, and a practical exercise for moving from guilt to acceptance.
Amy J. Brown is a writer, mentor, and co-host of the podcast, Take Heart. She is the author of the book The Other Side Of Special: Navigating the Messy, Emotional, and Joy-Filled Life of a Special Needs Mom. Amy has a Master’s Degree in Spiritual Formation and Leadership. She shares honestly about adoption and parenting children with mental health issues and trauma. She is the mother of six children. She lives with her husband in Michigan.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksThe Other Side of Special* by Amy J. Brown, Sara Clime, Carrie M. Holt
Connect on Instagram
Join our Reclaim Compassion Coaching Group
*this is an affiliate link
It's easy to get bogged down in big behaviors and forget to have positive interactions with your kids. TBRI® Nurture...Continue reading
We often have opportunities to be guests on other podcasts, and we've had some great conversations. We'd hate for you...Continue reading
We often have opportunities to be guests on other podcasts, and we've had some great conversations. We'd hate for you...Continue reading
We often have opportunities to be guests on other podcasts, and we've had some great conversations. We'd hate for you...Continue reading
Our "What We Learned in 2022" episode got such great feedback that we decided to drop in with a mid-year...Continue reading
Abandoned at a young age, Stephanie wandered the war-torn countryside of Korea. Due to her bi-racial ethnicity, she was abused and...Continue reading
Vacations are fun until they're not. The anticipation anxiety, change in routine, and potential overstimulation can make enjoyable vacations feel impossible.
In this episode, you'll learn:
- things to consider when planning
- how to set realistic expectations
- tried and true tips for keeping the fun in vacation
Rachel Bell is an adoptive mom and founder Bell Travel Co. (@belltravelco), that specializes in travel for families and also individuals with food allergies and special needs.
Kristen Perso is an adoptive mom and founder of Cherry Blossom Vacations (@cherry_blossom_vacations) which renews families through the gift of vacation
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksJoin Reclaim Compassion for access to the Q&A portion and future workshops
Connect with Rachel and Bell Travel Co. on Instagram
Bell Travel Co Website
Connect with Kristen and Cherry Blossom Vacations on Instagram
Cherry Blossom Vacations Website
This week we answer listener questions such as:
- How do I give "yesses" to an adult child to strengthen connection?
- Is younger child adoption easier than older child adoption?
- Can you explain why my child begs for hugs and then rejects them?
Click here to download the transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksThe Connected Parent*** by Dr. Karyn Purvis and Lisa C. Qualls
Join Reclaim Compassion
*This is an affiliate link
Parenting kids who have experienced trauma, loss and separation can be challenging. Finding strategies that heal and actually work provides hope to parents who are struggling, but these strategies can seem strange to others. Our parents, neighbors, friends, and family (maybe even that lady we see at church each week) have opinions, suggestions and perhaps even judgment about our new parenting strategies. This workshop will give us some tools to help our loved ones understand why we parent the way we do.
Beth Smith Feger has over 20 years of experience in training and education. Since completing a Ph.D. in early childhood education in 2009, she has worked training teachers, parents and young people. She is a passionate life long learner and has co-written a text book for early childhood educators. She is currently the Director of Programs at Fostering Hope, an organization the equips and supports families and churches to care for children who have experienced trauma. She is also the mom to three kids, two adopted from foster care. She lives in Austin with her family and enjoys reading, swimming and Marvel movies.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksI Am Fostering Hope
Join Reclaim Compassion
When Kristen Thomas acted out as a child at school, it was a cry for help, but she was instead labeled as a "difficult child." Eventually placed in foster care, Kristen struggled with shame and being misunderstood by the people who were supposed to protect her. In this episode, she openly shares her story of how she's breaking the cycle of generational abuse in her family. She also shares the importance and role of community and what she needed from her caregivers.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksConnect with Kristen on Instagram
Free blocked care assessment
This week we answer listener questions such as:
- How do you talk about love from birth parents when there's been extensive abuse?
- How do you address psychosomatic symptoms in your child?
- Is the new book helpful for other caregivers who interact with my child?
Click here to download the transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksBody work episodes
160: Essential Oils and Mental Health with Dr. Danielle Daniel
Reclaim Compassion
Is your adoption journey turning out differently than you imagined? You had so much love to give, but now you feel ashamed and bewildered by your lack of compassion.
You may be experiencing blocked care—a self-protective mechanism in your nervous system that makes it difficult to connect with your child and maintain compassion. When it happens, it’s like your heart seems to have left the relationship. But the good news is you are not a bad parent. You can heal from blocked care, and compassion can be rekindled in your heart.
Written by @lisacqualls and @melissacorkum_ who have themselves overcome blocked care, the book, Reclaim Compassion, answers the questions, “How did this happen, and will it ever get better?” You’ll recognize yourself in the honest stories from the authors and other parents and come to realize that you’re not at all alone.
Rooted in faith and backed by neuroscience, this practical and powerful guide offers a simple step-by-step process for reclaiming compassion for your child and yourself.
This week, enjoy an audio preview of Chapter 1.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksReclaim Compassion Website
Your attachment style impact ALL relationships in your life - including your relationship with God. Learn how your attachment style impacts your spiritual life, and how to take steps toward increased attachment security with God.
Krispin Mayfield, LPC has a background in full-time ministry and now practices an attachment based therapy, Emotionally Focused Therapy, with individuals and couples. He lives in Oregon with his wife D.L. and their two children.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksAttached to God* by Krispin Mayfield
Connect with Krispin on Instagram
Join Reclaim Compassion for access to Q&A
*This is an affiliate link
Hannah Strege is the first adopted frozen embryo in the world, adopted through the Snowflakes Embryo Adoption program at Nightlight Christian adoptions. She shares about the importance of adoptees knowing their origin story, how she navigates her open adoption, and how adoption impacts her identity. Hannah is a graduate student at Baylor University working on a Masters of Social Work degree. She hopes to some day open a private practice to counsel adoptees, placing families, and adopting families/couples throughout the lifelong adoption process.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksConnect with Hannah on Instagram
Nightlight Christian Adoptions
A Snowflake Named Hannah* by John Strege
*This is an affiliate link
This week we answer listener questions such as:
- When do you give consequences in your home?
- What do we do when the simple act of setting a boundary is a guarantee of conflict and disrespect?
- How can start facilitating a healthier attachment and decrease separation anxiety?
- What do we do if our son is sneaking out to spend time with his birth family?
Click here to download the transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksJoin Reclaim Compassion
As Dr. Karyn Purvis famously said, "You cannot lead a child to a place of healing if you do not know the way yourself." Making sense of our histories is essential to helping our children heal. In today's episode, Lisa reads portions of Chapter 2 of The Connected Parent, the book she co-authored with Dr. Karyn Purvis.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksThe Connected Parent*** by Purvis and Qualls
Join Reclaim Compassion
*This is an affiliate link
Food challenges are common for children with early adversity. We often get questions regarding undereating, overeating, picky eating, hoarding, and sneaking.
In this workshop you will:
- Learn relationship-building strategies to address common issues such as picky eating, power struggles, and weight worries.
- Understand the health benefits of felt safety and how it helps children do their best with eating.
Katja Rowell MD is a family doctor, author and childhood feeding specialist who helps parents and caregivers help children to heal their relationship with food and their bodies, and do their best with eating.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksConnect with Dr. Rowell on Instagram
Love Me, Feed Me* by Katja Rowell M.D.
Felt Safety Handout
Get more help at Reclaim Compassion
*This is an affiliate link
A lot of children shut down when you try to directly correct behaviors or address fears and past experiences. Story, imagination, and play are great ways to tackle tough issues without starting a control battle with your kids. Join Imagination Specialists and veteran parents, Darren and Margie Fink to learn the four steps of bibliotherapy.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksTransfiguring Adoption
Buy Magical Creatures resources
Join Reclaim Compassion
How can we help our kids navigate their identity, and sit with them in the unknowns of their story or the grief and loss that comes up?
Jenn and Josh Hook don't shy away from the hard topics in this fantastic interview. They offer practical ideas for connecting across cultures and supporting your child's unique identity. We also talk about following your child's lead and honoring their grief process as they try to understand their story.
Jenn Ranter Hook, MA, is the Founder and Executive Director of Replanted – a ministry that provides post-placement support to foster & adoptive families through support groups and the Replanted Conference. She previously worked as a trauma therapist for children and adolescents in foster care. She speaks frequently on topics related to adoption and foster care support, mental health, and trauma.
Joshua Hook, PhD, is a Professor of Psychology at the University of North Texas, where he teaches Multicultural Counseling and Positive Psychology. He is also a Licensed Clinical Psychologist in the state of Texas. He blogs about psychology and faith at JoshuaNHook.com.
Josh and Jenn co-authored Replanted: Faith-based support for foster and adoptive families, and Thriving Families: A trauma-informed guidebook for the foster and adoptive journey. They live in Dallas, TX with their daughter.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksThriving Families: A Trauma-Informed Guidebook for the Foster and Adoptive Journey*
Connect with Replanted on Instagram
Connect with Replanted on Facebook
*This is an affiliate link
This week we answer listener questions such as:
- What do you do when not everyone in the family wants to foster/adopt anymore?
- What if one of our kids isn't accepting a newly adopted sibling?
- What do you do when a child always wants to pick an option not on the list when given two choices?
- Is anything we're doing making a difference?
Click here to download the transcript for this episode.
With the demands of life and parenting, it can be hard to find time to stop and reflect. But pausing and reflecting is good for our soul, our nervous system, and our relationships. In this last episode for 2022 we thought it would be fun to recap the year. What we learned. When we experienced God's kindness. What we're excited about in 2023.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksThe Magnificent Lives of Marjorie Post: A Novel* by Allison Pataki
Start with Hello* by Shannon Martin
Books by Ruth Haley Barton*
- This is an affiliate link
Kids are growing up in a world of worry today. Anxiety, in fact, is a childhood epidemic, effecting 1 out of every 4 children. Kids of all ages feel pressure...from the expectations around them, inside of them, and even, unknowingly, from us. What can we do to slow the epidemic for kids, in general? And, even more importantly, what can you do to calm the worry-related meltdowns and help your child find the confidence to fight his or her own brand of Worry Monster?
In this workshop, you’ll gain:
• understanding the what’s and why’s in terms of the differences between anxiety and worry, and where your child is on the continuum
• help practically with tools to overcome the worry that he or she will inevitably face
• hope as your child discovers a sense of resilience that is stronger than any worry this age of
anxiety can bring
Children need understanding, help, and hope. You can make a profound difference in their their journey to finding all three. You will come out of this seminar feeling not only more confident in your parenting but in your ability to help them discover all of the courage that is already inside of them.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksRaising Boys & Girls Website
Books by David Thomas
Raising Boys & Girls Podcast
Follow David on Instagram
Listen in as Lisa talks with two single moms about their experiences of becoming adoptive parents. Susan chose international adoption. Britani became an adoptive mom through a kinship care foster placement. They speak candidly about the blessings and challenges of being a single adoptive mom and where they find the support they need.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant LinksHoliday Survival Resources
The Village (use code podcast)
No one likes to fail. But kids with learning differences feel like they’re failing a lot. They always feel like...Continue reading
This week we answer listener questions about surviving the holidays: * How do I balance the kids' need for downtime...Continue reading
Do you feel isolated or alone in your parenting journey? Do you have trouble connecting with other parents because they...Continue reading
Dealing with frequent and intense meltdowns in preschool and school-aged children can be exhausting! Sometimes they are due to sensory...Continue reading
When your adoption journey is different than what you expected, there are a lot of ambiguous losses to grieve. Every...Continue reading
Every adoptee experiences their story through a unique lens. This week we welcome adoptee, Jennifer Dyan Ghoston, who hosts the...Continue reading
This week we answer listener questions such as: * How can I be compassionate towards my child's behaviors without letting...Continue reading
Patrick and Melissa have two kids by birth, four through adoption, and a live-in granddaughter. They’ve weathered adopting out of...Continue reading
No parent enjoys a tantrum. Kids don’t either. It never feels good to have such big feelings that they come...Continue reading
Saying "yes" to fostering kids often stretches us in ways we never imagined. Jillana Goble is an author, advocate, non-profit...Continue reading
This week we answer listener questions such as: What do you do on days you don’t want to be around...Continue reading
We hate it when our kids lie to us; it’s annoying, frustrating and scary. In this workshop replay, you will...Continue reading
Is your experience of parenting children with early trauma turning out the way you expected? Or is it vastly different...Continue reading
Most of know about adoption through foster care or private, infant adoption. But what do you know about embryo adoption?...Continue reading
This week we answer listener questions such as: How do you help kids handle sudden changes to routine? How do...Continue reading
Students impacted by trauma, early adversity, and chronic stress often struggle in classroom and education environments. Many adopted children qualify...Continue reading
We often have opportunities to be guests on other podcasts, and we've had some great conversations. We'd hate for you...Continue reading
We often have opportunities to be guests on other podcasts, and we've had some great conversations. We'd hate for you...Continue reading
We often have opportunities to be guests on other podcasts, and we've had some great conversations. We'd hate for you...Continue reading
We often have opportunities to be guests on other podcasts, and we've had some great conversations. We'd hate for you...Continue reading
Because trauma, early adversity, and chronic stress impact a child's ability to learn vicariously, many children struggle with issues related...Continue reading
We value lived experience, so when we heard about Kitty's story, we knew we needed to invite her voice to...Continue reading
The worst feeling in the world is feeling powerless against our kids’ challenging behaviors. In an effort to regain control,...Continue reading
This week we answer listener questions such as: Do the behaviors only happening at home stem from an attachment issue?...Continue reading
Early trauma and childhood adversity cause changes in the brain. Kids with neurodivergent brains often display challenging behaviors which look...Continue reading
Even if you have a large family or a very busy life, finding time to connect with our kids and...Continue reading
This week we answer listener questions such as: Should we adopt again if one of our kids is opposed? How...Continue reading
Jennifer has a unique perspective because of the opportunity she’s had to walk through the adoption journey as a birthmother...Continue reading
The emotional response to Mother's Day can be complicated, even more so for adoptive and foster moms. This week, we...Continue reading
Many Christian parents worry that trust-based parenting is too lenient or permissive. After all, the book of Proverbs tells us...Continue reading
A lot of parents ask us, “How do I stay calm?” We want to share the brain-science behind the problem...Continue reading
As an adoptee, Jennifer Hiltebeitel, was excited to adopt and be the mom she wished she would have had growing...Continue reading
This week we answer listener questions such as: What if birth family visits confuse or trigger my kids? How do...Continue reading
Have you ever felt like your adoption journey shipwrecked your life? How do you find hope when you can hold...Continue reading
Children with a history of early adversity have a higher probability of becoming dependent on substances. In this episode, we...Continue reading
Behind all the challenging behaviors, each child just wants to belong. This week, former foster youth and NFL player, Gaelin...Continue reading
This week we answer listener questions such as:
- Any suggestions for using TBRI with a non-verbal child?
- How do you handle it when kids avoid responsibility or chores?
- Why can’t my child learn that if he hides his destruction from us we will be more upset than if he admits to it?
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant Links
161: [workshop] A New Twist on Chores with Greg Rea
Join The Village
Ask a question in our Facebook group
Puberty in children who have undergone trauma looks different, but it doesn't have to be alarming. This week, Dr. Melody Aguayo, adoptive mom and founder of Real Child Consulting, helps us understand:
- What happens in the body and brain of kids going through puberty.
- Identify "normal sexual acting " out versus "deviant behaviors."
- Practical tools to navigate this difficult season.
She is both TBRI trained and Circle of Security trained and has a passion for helping hurting families and children turn their pain into purpose.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant Links Real Child Consulting
Sheri Rego - Working with Children Who Display Sexual Behavioral Problems
The Healthy Bodies Toolkit for Boys
The Healthy Bodies Toolkit for Girls
Join The Village (use code: podcast)
Adoptive and foster families often find themselves barely functioning and just trying to survive when caring for children with hard behaviors. For a lot of families, trauma has left a trail of devastation not unlike Nehemiah found when he returned to Jerusalem. But just like the temple was rebuilt, we can rebuild our hearts and our families.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant Links Faith, Hope, & Connection: A 30-Day Devotional for Adoptive and Foster Parents*
*This is an affiliate link
This week we answer listener questions such as:
- How does time in work when I need to separate two children?
- Are martial arts lessons a good idea or will they make my child more aggressive?
- How do you respond to people who make judgements towards you or your parenting?
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant Links Join The Village
Ask a question in our Facebook group
There are great rewards that come along with being a foster parent, yet there are also great challenges that can leave you feeling depleted, alone, and discouraged. With the compassion and insight of a fellow foster parent, Jamie Finn helps you see your struggles through the lens of the gospel, bringing biblical truths to bear on your unique everyday realities.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant Links Foster the Family* by Jamie Finn
Connect with Jamie on Instagram
Faith, Hope, & Connection Devotional*
*This is an affiliate link
Chores? Yuck!
Most of us view chores as unpleasant but necessary tasks. But what if CHORES could be a great way to deepen our connection with our children and teens?
What if CHORES could build trust and increase our children’s sense of belonging to the family?
Join Greg Lombard Rea as he expands our view of chores to CHORES - CHildren Offered Relational ExperienceS.
Greg is an adoptive and bio Dad, TBRI Practitioner and Post-Adoption Support Specialist.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant Links Michaeleen Doucleff
How To Get Your Kids To Do Chores (Without Resenting It)
The Village (use code: podcast)
One of the things we love most about you, our community, is that you're so dedicated to and persistant when it comes to finding things that will help our kids and their nervous systems. One tool we have in our family's tool belt is essential oils. We know there are a lot of mixes messages and opinions about essential oils, so we wanted to bring you an expert that could use brain science, my favorite to help us out.
Dr. Danielle Daniel is a Doctor of Psychology and Licensed Clinical Social Worker with a holistic approach to the brain. She trains hospitals, clinics and therapists around the world on the field of Psychoaromcology and the application of Psychoaromatherapy.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant Links Connect with Dr. Danielle on Instagram
Buy the essential oils Dr. Daniel recommends
Join The Village (use code: podcast)
The Regulation Rescue
Many families feel isolated while parenting children through adoption. Either they don't feel understood by friends and family or they just don't have time for community like they used to.
Shannan Martin, is an adoptive mom and the author who found her voice in the country and her story in the city. This week she speaks about how she found community in unexpected places and now practices radical hospitality.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant Links Connect with Shannan on Instagram
The Ministry of Ordinary Places*** by Shannan Martin
Falling Free: Rescued from the Life I Always Wanted*** by Shannan Martin
Join the Village (use code: podcast)
*This is an affiliate link
This week we answer listener questions such as:
- How do I address my child's affection with strangers? Is it attachment related?
- How do I create healthy boundaries with birth grandparents?
- How would you handle technology with a teen foster placement?
- What if my adopted kids think we treat them differently?
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant Links TBRI Practitioner List
DDP Practitioner List
The Village
Regulation Rescue
Ask a question in our Facebook group
Greg recently facilitated a conversation in our dads-only group about how to support our kids through the holidays. They talked about favorite traditions, navigating visitation with birth family, and more and gave us permission to share their conversation with you.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant Links The Village
13: Survive the Holidays While Keeping the Joy
65: Heartwarming Holiday Stories for Adoptive Families
What is kinship care? How is it the same and different from foster care?
In today's episode, Michelle Thompson, founder of Bithiah's Family Services, talks about the unique experience of kinship care, what families need, and how we can best support them.
Michelle is a credentialed teacher, author, and Co-Founder of Bithiah's Family Services. Specializing in supporting teachers to create empathetic, graced-based classrooms , Michelle trains educators across districts to educate students through a trauma informed lens. Michelle and her husband started Bithiah's as a residential treatment facility providing services to children in the foster care system and continue to expand the services and support it provides to vulnerable children and those that provide care to them. She is a Southern California native and mom to 5 through birth and adoption.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant Links Bithiah's Family Services on Instagram
Bithiah's Family Services on Facebook
Faith, Hope, & Connection: A 30-Day Devotional for Adoptive and Foster Parents
The Village
Sandeep faced horrible tragedy and trauma as a young child in India. However, in the providence of God he was adopted by a loving couple in the U.S at age six which dramatically changed the course of his life. He co-founded Unfolding Adoptees which provides Christian adult adoptees with an honest community in which they tell their stories to share encouragement and insight that is grounded in Biblical truth and Christlike love.
Click here to download a transcript for this episode.
Relevant Links Unfolding Adoptees Website
Unfolding Adoptees on Facebook
Unfolding Adoptees on Instagram