Not So Perfect Marriage: Recent Episodes
Not So Perfect Marriage
Three years into a not so perfect, but beautiful, fulfilling and loving marriage, Mayra and Rene discuss each other, their lives, their family, their friends and everything that is important (and entertaining) to them.
On this week’s episode of the Not So Perfect Marriage Podcast we talk about the craziness that is buying home. We talk about all of the living arrangements including renting, living with parents and finally moving into your own home. We're not experts, but you'll here about our experience navigating the home buying process and remodeling your home.We also spend some time talking about recently celebrating our 7th anniversary and celebrating Rene's upcoming birthday! Enjoy!
On this week’s episode of the Not So Perfect Marriage Podcast we talk about one of the most impactful resources that helped our marriage while we were navigating being first time parents. We talk about how we got into therapy, how therapy helped our interactions and overall communication styles, and we openly discuss one of the issues we brought up during therapy. Spoiler alert, it has to do with money! One of the things most couples argue about: money. We also talk about the anxiety of trying to find a good nanny that you trust and love, after our long time plan for childcare fell through. We talk about how we found our nanny, how having a nanny worked for our family, our experience being our nanny’s employers and the responsibilities that came with that. Similarly, we discuss our choice to have our baby start Montessori school after he turned two years old and how Montessori school has been working for us and our baby. Lasly, we talk briefly about our weekend trip to Vegas, the good, bad, and the ugly. Just kidding, it was a great time with an awesome show, shopping, and gambling. Enjoy!
Marriage after babya. Day of birthb. The difficulty of the newborn phasec. Sleep trainingd. Getting to know ourselves as mom and dade. Living life as a family of threei. Navigating the challengesii. Lots of arguments and a lot of adjustmentsiii. Intimacy after babyiv. Commitment to your marriage is a daily choice-putting energy into further enhancing the relationshipf. Mayra's birthday
Marriage and Pregnancy
Impacts on the relationship due to pregnancy Pros and Cons Pros- closer relationship Cons- Navigating pregnancy complications together, Intimacy issues due to pregnancy complications, pregnancy during a pandemic Cleared for intimacy and daddy issues with the belly
Expectations about Parenthood- Baby Prep Worries… Fears… Concerns… Looking forward to..
Overall Pregnancy - what’s its been like for us
Current Pregnancy Status..?
Explanation- how we decided to stop talking about our IVF journey but secretly kept going ERA- Endometrial Receptivity Analysis Frozen Embryo Transfer 22 weeks pregnant- feeling / thoughts Gender reveal Reviews
Handling the pandemic as a couple
Current work situations Who is my partner at work? Pursuing individual interests/ goals Fitness Separating work from home Take out/ date nights Handling being away from loved ones Preparing for the foreseeable future
Who Doesn’t Love to Travel??
Quick recap of the last month Overdue Podcast Our latest trip to Arizona- Scottsdale Who Doesn’t Love to Travel How often? Best trips together? Previous favorite trips? Current trips planned? Conclusion
Valentines Day topic: Sexy times in marriage
Life updates- new lifestyle who dis?
Plant based!
Cheese was responsible for our quiet New Years in Vegas
René is a model … Prophet too
Sex Museum in Las Vegas
Reading material…Come as you are…author Emily Nagoski
.curiosity… the most embarrassing thing that happened to Mayr this decade
Our sex life- not what you thought Frequency, duration, intensity
Final thoughts …. KOBE
Navigating the holidays Cultural differences Chilean traditions vs Mexican traditions Gift giving when you’re married Things your spouse does that annoy you René lost his credit card , putting crazy amounts of TP in the toilet and clogging the toilet René is a crazy genius Mayra is “messy” and goes to bed early , too positive Mayra doesn’t listen to Rene until someone else tells her the same thing Compromise IVF update
“In Sickness and In Health”
IVF Update Mayra’s Surgery Seeing your partner go through pain Emotional pain Supporting your partner through negative feelings Practicing understanding/ active listening instead of prescribing feelings and not being judgmental Physical pain
Caring for your spouse - nurse Rene Being a team through physical ailments
Next steps - IVF
Support and love from family and friends
Work / Life Balance- when should it be flexible when does it need to be defined?
Bye Bye Summer / Hello Fall
Vegas Good Boys Allowing your partner to pursue their passions: Living a fulfilled and balanced life Being yourself in your marriage to the point that your partner encourages you to pursue your passion Renes passion or passions Mayra’s understanding of Rene needing to work on his passion Mayra’s passions and renes response to those pursuits Including your partner in your expression for creativity The positive impacts of these creative pursuits in marriage IVF Updates Conclusion
Life Starts when the Church Ends
Been a month since our last podcast, what have we been up to?
We were apart for almost two weeks
Discussing and planning for time apart
Taking time tos how appreciation
Religion and Spirituality Mayra is very spiritual, Renés beliefs are different
Catholic Background Mayra Raised catholic Went to catholic school Does not practice Rene Raised catholic Went to catholic school Taught CCD, altar boy, choir No longer believes in God
Evolution of Religion and Spirituality What changed for both Rene and Mayra? How do you feel about the catholic religion? The catholic church? Why did we get married in the church? Mayra plans on raising our children catholic. Rene?
How do we make it work? Open mind Patience Good/Bad vs Believer/Non-Believer
How do our parents feel?
Introduction
Topic of the week: Gender Roles in Marriage
Household Responsibilities cooking, dishes, laundry, cleaning, yard work, etc Expectations for these roles The norm vs Us
While growing up and seeing our parents gender roles and how that impacts our roles in our marriage
Making money and gender roles Our time in Chicago and the impact it had on Mayra contributing to the household income René’s new responsibilities of financially being responsible for his partner
Wedding Officiant
IVF updates
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No Intimacy for Family Planning - An Infertility Journey
Our plans for a family after marriage No success after a year Testing - everything is good! Keep trying When everyone around you convinces you that you will achieve pregnancy despite the struggle Instincts are better than medical advice Enough is enough… seeing a specialist Learning natural conception would never be possible Planning for treatment Coverage for infertility treatment 1st part of treatment- egg retrieval journey: injections, high egg production, physical, emotional, financial burdens, and practicing abstinence during the process Egg retrieval results
Rene and I get real about what’s actually been going on in our life- which includes dealing with conflict, unplugging during the weekend, what we both think about manifestation and law of attraction, family planning, the benefits of spending time away from your partner, and of course more reviews on our beloved impossible burger.