INFP Thrive for Enneagram 9s: Recent Episodes
Enneagram & Clarity Coach Sarah Mikutel
A show for gentle souls who are ready to shine. INFP Enneagram 9s are reserved yet passionate dreamers and creative thinkers who often put the needs of others first. That doesn’t mean we don’t have our own ambitions and desires. To achieve them, we must become more visible. In this experimental audio diary, host Sarah Mikutel stretches out of her comfort zone to work through what it takes to step out of the shadows and into the spotlight.
Do you ever feel like people are too blunt – or not direct enough? Do you live by the clock, or are you free with your schedule? Do you like to cut to the chase and get to work, or do you need to warm up first? These are not just individual preferences – they are cultural norms. In this episode, I explore why we are the way we are, and what happens when different cultures collide.
Read the article.
The Culture Map
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you want to become a more calm, confident communicator at work and in your personal life – let’s talk.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
There's an unwritten rule in Swedish culture called the Law of Jante: Don't think you're special. Don't stand out. Blend in. It’s the opposite of American individualism – and both sides have a shadow. In this episode, I explore what a Swedish flatmate, living in Italy, and years of coaching have taught me about fitting in versus standing out, and why it matters for anyone working across cultures.
Read the article.
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you want to become a more calm, confident communicator at work and in your personal life – let’s talk.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
Turns out there’s not just one way to listen – there are four, at least according to the authors of Adaptive Listening: How to Cultivate Trust and Traction at Work.
In this episode, I share when to use each level of listening, plus the question you should always ask yourself before opening your mouth.
Read the article.
Read Adaptive Listening.
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you want to become a more calm, confident communicator at work and in your personal life – let’s talk.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
Love isn't what most people think it is. It’s not a bond between partners or family, according to Dr. Barbara Fredrickson – it’s a micro-moment of positivity that resonates in your body when you connect with someone, even with strangers. And the research is clear: The more of these moments you create, the happier and healthier you’ll be.
Read the article.
Love 2.0 book
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you want to become a more calm, confident communicator at work and in your personal life – let’s talk.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
Have you ever thought: “If they really loved me, they’d just know without me having to say it.”
But expecting someone to intuit your needs isn’t romantic – it’s magical thinking. In this episode, I talk about why unspoken expectations lead to disappointment, the shift you need to make for real connection, and why clarity is one of the most generous things you can offer in a relationship.
Read the transcript.
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you're ready to stop procrastinating so you can live the life you truly want – let’s talk.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
I cried in my first knitting class and I didn’t know why – it’s not like I’m emotionally invested in making potholders out of yarn.
In this episode, I explore the quiet pressure we put on ourselves without realizing it, and how we can give ourselves more grace.
Read the transcript
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you're ready to stop procrastinating so you can live the life you truly want – let’s talk.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
My guest today, Sunalie, is a warm and gifted journalist – and also a former client of mine.
During our time together, she had so many meaningful wins. Hearing about the specific shifts she made will help you strengthen your own confidence and communication skills – including how to feel more at ease when all eyes are on you.
Sunalie has been with her partner for over 20 years, but they never got married. Not because she didn’t want to, but because the thought of standing in front of a room with all eyes on her felt overwhelming.
That tension – wanting a moment, but not wanting to be seen – is something many of us can relate to.
We shrink to protect ourselves. It’s a pattern we learn early. But at some point, most of us start questioning how we’re living, who we want to be, and whether we’re satisfied with how we’re showing up. We start wondering what else might be possible.
What you’re about to hear is a conversation about what can shift when you stop bracing for disappointment and start letting yourself be seen.
Sunalie didn't just learn to speak up more. She learned to share more. She learned to feel comfortable being herself. And that changed the trajectory of her work, her relationships, and her confidence.
If you’re at a similar crossroads – you’re successful, but you can feel that you’re still putting up walls or playing small – this episode will resonate. Enjoy!
❤️
If you’re listening and realizing you’re ready to begin your own transformation story, book a free consultation with me today. This is the work I love doing most – helping you get out of your head and start looking and feeling more confident in your communication.
Book your free communication coaching consultation
www.sarahmikutel.com
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
Are you procrastinating more than you think you are? In this episode, I’m talking about virtuous procrastination – the act of avoiding discomfort, uncertainty, or purposeful risk by busying yourself with work that appears responsible, generous, and good. Volunteering. Overcommitting. Over-preparing. It looks admirable, but sometimes it’s just a sneaky distraction from what’s most important to you.
Read the article.
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you're ready to stop procrastinating so you can live the life you truly want – let’s talk.
We can also chat on Insta :)
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
Comfort can quietly cost you the life you really want. When we play it too safe in the name of avoiding unpleasant thoughts or feelings, we drift away from our values and the things that bring meaning, energy, and connection. The Stoics offer a way back through intentional action, self-inquiry, and showing up with integrity – even when it’s uncomfortable.
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you're ready to have conversations that open doors – in your career, your relationships, and your life – let’s talk.
We can also chat on Insta :)
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
We often have something meaningful to say – but the way we say it can get in the way. We overload our listener with backstory, hoping to make them understand, and end up muddying the message instead. In this episode, I explore why this happens and how a small shift in how we speak can make a big difference.
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you're ready to have conversations that open doors – in your career, your relationships, and your life – let’s talk.
Feeling on edge lately? You’re not alone.
What if I created a membership where we’ll practice techniques I use with my one-to-one clients to calm the nervous system – and have fun while we’re at it.
If this community sounds great to you, get on the waitlist to register your interest. This helps me gauge interest and puts you first in line for special founder pricing if it launches.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
Carrie Bradshaw used to feel relatable. Now we accuse her of being unhinged.
But maybe that says more about us than it does about her.
Read the article.
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you're ready to have conversations that open doors – in your career, your relationships, and your life – let’s talk.
Feeling on edge lately? You’re not alone.
What if I created a membership where we’ll practice techniques I use with my one-to-one clients to calm the nervous system – and have fun while we’re at it.
If this community sounds great to you, get on the waitlist to register your interest. This helps me gauge interest and puts you first in line for special founder pricing if it launches.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
We’ve all had those moments where an insult or offhand comment sticks in our head. Hours later, we’re still replaying it, wishing we’d come up with the perfect comeback. But what if the strongest response isn’t a clever line at all?
In this episode, I explore what the Stoics – and even a surprising scene from Gladiator 2 – can teach us about handling insults and keeping our peace of mind. You’ll hear:
- Why chasing the “upper hand” keeps us stuck.
- How Epictetus, a former slave turned philosopher, framed the danger of being ruled by our emotions.
- A personal story about how even a small, everyday slight can get under our skin – and what to do about it.
- Practical tools to stay grounded when you feel like punching someone.
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you're ready to have conversations that open doors – in your career, your relationships, and your life – let’s talk.
Feeling on edge lately? You’re not alone.
What if I created a membership where we’ll practice techniques I use with my one-to-one clients to calm the nervous system – and have fun while we’re at it.
If this community sounds great to you, get on the waitlist to register your interest. This helps me gauge interest and puts you first in line for special founder pricing if it launches.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
To move forward, sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is pause and take stock of how far you’ve come.
Read the article.
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you're ready to have conversations that open doors – in your career, your relationships, and your life – let’s talk.
Feeling on edge lately? You’re not alone.
What if I created a membership where we’ll practice techniques I use with my one-to-one clients to calm the nervous system – and have fun while we’re at it.
If this community sounds great to you, get on the waitlist to register your interest. This helps me gauge interest and puts you first in line for special founder pricing if it launches.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
I finally became a British citizen after years of putting it off – not because I didn’t qualify, but because perfectionism kept slowing me down.
In this episode, I share the real reason I delayed, what happened when I shifted my focus from “perfect” to “done,” and revisit how the concept of maximizers vs. satisficers can help you move forward in your life.
Read the article (and come say hi on Substack).
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you're ready to have conversations that open doors – in your career, your relationships, and your life – let’s talk.
Feeling on edge lately? You’re not alone.
What if I created a membership where we’ll practice techniques I use with my one-to-one clients to calm the nervous system – and have fun while we’re at it.
If this community sounds great to you, get on the waitlist to register your interest. This helps me gauge interest and puts you first in line for special founder pricing if it launches.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
Being blunt isn’t the same as being brave. In a culture that idolizes people who “say whatever they think,” we’ve started confusing impulsiveness for honesty, and arrogance for authenticity.
But unfiltered speech isn’t just lazy. Sometimes, it’s harmful.
In this episode, I explore the difference between courage and carelessness, and how to practice mindful communication without losing your voice or your values.
Read the article.
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you're ready to have conversations that open doors – in your career, your relationships, and your life – let’s talk.
Feeling on edge lately? You’re not alone.
What if I created a membership where we’ll practice techniques I use with my one-to-one clients to calm the nervous system – and have fun while we’re at it.
If this community sounds great to you, get on the waitlist to register your interest. This helps me gauge interest and puts you first in line for special founder pricing if it launches.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
The Science of Connection: Building Bonds Through Small Acts of Love
In this episode, I share a brief moment with my nephew that opened up a bigger question: How do we create the kind of presence that people remember?
I explore the science of likability, the concept of “Love 2.0,” and why the smallest gestures – eye contact, laughter, a kind word – have long-lasting emotional and health benefits. This isn’t about being charming or chosen. It’s about how we choose to show up.
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you're ready to have conversations that open doors – in your career, your relationships, and your life – let’s talk.
Does the phrase “public speaking” make you feel a little sick…even if it’s just a team meeting or a group conversation?
I made something to help you.
Calm Your Nerves in 90 Seconds is a free anxiety-reduction toolkit with a guided meditation and journal to help you communicate with confidence.
Use it anytime your brain goes into overdrive and you need a reset.
https://sarahmikutel.com/reset
Feeling on edge lately? You’re not alone.
What if I created a membership where we’ll practice techniques I use with my one-to-one clients to calm the nervous system – and have fun while we’re at it.
If this community sounds great to you, get on the waitlist to register your interest. This helps me gauge interest and puts you first in line for special founder pricing if it launches.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
What if the real key to growth isn’t pushing harder, but celebrating more?
In this episode, I’m sharing why savoring your wins matters – how it rewires your brain, reinforces your identity, and helps you live in alignment with your values.
If you’ve been rushing from one goal to the next, this is your invitation to pause, reflect, and really honor the actions you’re taking.
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you're ready to have conversations that open doors – in your career, your relationships, and your life – let’s talk.
Feeling on edge lately? You’re not alone.
What if I created a membership where we’ll practice techniques I use with my one-to-one clients to calm the nervous system – and have fun while we’re at it.
If this community sounds great to you, get on the waitlist to register your interest. This helps me gauge interest and puts you first in line for special founder pricing if it launches.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
What did the Founding Fathers actually mean when they talked about “the pursuit of happiness” – and how can we apply that wisdom to our lives today?
This episode is about what real happiness looks like – not the fireworks version, but the kind that comes from gratitude, good character, and being present for the small moments.
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you're ready to have conversations that open doors – in your career, your relationships, and your life – let’s talk.
Feeling on edge lately? You’re not alone.
What if I created a membership where we’ll practice techniques I use with my one-to-one clients to calm the nervous system – and have fun while we’re at it.
If this community sounds great to you, get on the waitlist to register your interest. This helps me gauge interest and puts you first in line for special founder pricing if it launches.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
Struggling to start something new because you're afraid of looking foolish? This episode is your permission slip to begin. You’ll learn how Stoic philosophy and growth mindset can help you move through discomfort, let go of perfectionism, and build real confidence – one imperfect step at a time. If you’ve been overthinking or biting your tongue, this conversation will help you shift into action.
Read the transcript
I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, a communication and mindset coach. My work is about helping people like you share your voice, strengthen your relationships, and have more fun.
As an American expat living in the U.K., I value curiosity, courage, and joy. A few things I love: wandering European streets in search of the best vegetarian meal, practicing Italian, and helping my clients design lives that feel rich and meaningful.
If you're ready to have conversations that open doors – in your career, your relationships, and your life – let’s talk.
Calm Your Nerves in 90 Seconds: Public Speaking Anxiety Reset
Does the phrase “public speaking” make you feel a little sick…even if it’s just a team meeting or a group conversation?
I made something to help you.
Calm Your Nerves in 90 Seconds is a free anxiety-reduction toolkit with a guided meditation and journal to help you communicate with confidence.
Use it anytime your brain goes into overdrive and you need a reset.
https://sarahmikutel.com/reset
Feeling on edge lately? You’re not alone.
What if I created a membership where we’ll practice techniques I use with my one-to-one clients to calm the nervous system – and have fun while we’re at it.
If this community sounds great to you, get on the waitlist to register your interest. This helps me gauge interest and puts you first in line for special founder pricing if it launches.
Do you ever go blank or start rambling when someone puts you on the spot?
I created a free Conversation Cheat Sheet with simple formulas you can use so you can respond with clarity, whether you’re in a meeting or just talking with friends.
Download it at sarahmikutel.com/blanknomore and start feeling more confident in your conversations today.
What do abandoned mansions in Bucharest have to do with dirty dishes and emotional resentment?
In this episode, I explore how our desire for fairness can lead us to self-sabotage — and how Stoic justice asks us to think beyond pride, punishment, and being right.
We’ll walk through a real-world example of decades-long property disputes, connect it to the Ultimatum Game in behavioral economics, and look at how these same dynamics show up in our everyday relationships — from family drama to who does the dishes.
This is an invitation to reflect on what you're holding onto, and whether it’s time to build something new — even without the apology or closure you thought you needed.
Hi! I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, an American in England and fellow citizen of the world. A few things I love: Stoicism, great vegetarian tacos, and helping my coaching clients thrive in all areas of their lives.
sarahmikutel.com ❤️
Does the phrase “public speaking” make you feel a little sick…even if it’s just a team meeting or a group conversation?
I made something to help you.
Calm Your Nerves in 90 Seconds is a free anxiety-reduction toolkit with a guided meditation and journal to help you communicate with confidence.
Use it anytime your brain goes into overdrive and you need a reset.
https://sarahmikutel.com/reset
Mr. Darcy has been on my mind this week. Not because he’s the fantasy of so many women, but because I finally read Pride and Prejudice, and discovered something shocking (to me) about him.
I’d always thought of Mr. Darcy as this tall, brooding, misunderstood character. The fabulously wealthy, handsome man who everyone thinks is a jerk, but secretly has a heart of gold and wants to take care of you. This is why women have been obsessed with him for hundreds of years. The strong, silent, mysterious hero.
But that’s not who he starts out as in the book.
Reading Pride and Prejudice reveals so much more about him, and about what it takes to change and grow.
In this episode, I’ll share what Mr. Darcy’s transformation can teach us about:
- how honest conversations can lead to personal transformation – for you and the person you’re speaking with.
- why hard conversations are worth having, even when they feel risky or uncomfortable.
- what Stoic principles and practical communication tools can help us handle conflict gracefully.
By the way – hello! I’m your host, Sarah Mikutel, an American writer, communication coach, and practicing Stoic based in England.
sarahmikutel.com
Nonviolent communication tips
Last week, I gave one of the lightning talks at Stoicon 2024. The topic: How to Combat Speaking Anxiety with Stoicism.
Want to see the video? Head to my Substack 👉 Citizens of the World
Thanks for listening ❤️
sarahmikutel.com
Why do we get angry? How can we challenge our immediate reactions? And what's the best way to articulate our feelings without passive aggression or a blow-up?
In this episode, you'll learn four Stoic tips to turn potential conflicts into opportunities for personal growth and stronger relationships.
Become a member of the Live Without Borders Community ❤️
Let’s continue the conversation. Head on over to my blog on Substack for more on how to thrive through better communication, Stoicism, and global exploration. We can chat together in the comments and I have fab bonuses for paid subscribers. Or, you can read new posts for free.Live Without Borders Substack
I’m reading David Fideler’s excellent book Breakfast with Seneca, where he quotes Seneca in one of his letters:
“If you want to escape your troubles, you don't need to be somewhere else: you need to be someone else.”
Those searching for meaning or purpose in life might think a new place will provide answers. But a new location, a new job, a new partner doesn’t guarantee a better life or a fresh start.
Finding purpose involves understanding your values, interests, and goals. It’s internal work that can be done anywhere.
sarahmikutel.com
Looking to live a more Stoic life? Let's chat.
Become a member of the Live Without Borders Community ❤️
Let’s continue the conversation. Head on over to my blog on Substack for more on how to thrive through better communication, Stoicism, and global exploration. We can chat together in the comments and I have fab bonuses for paid subscribers. Or, you can read new posts for free.Live Without Borders Substack
Our intentions don’t always line up with our outcomes, and misunderstandings lead to anger, sadness, frustration, and conflict. In this episode, I’ll talk about intent vs impact, which is more important, and how to effectively and ethically communicate your intentions. Of course, I’ll be weaving in the timeless wisdom of the Stoics.
Hi, I’m Sarah Mikutel, your communication and mindset coach, an Enneagram 9 expat in England, and practicing Stoic. Introverts come to me to learn to speak confidently in front of a room, online, and in social situations without becoming a sweaty, blushing mess with a stress headache.
Become a member of the Live Without Borders Community ❤️
Let’s continue the conversation. Head on over to my blog on Substack for more on how to thrive through better communication, Stoicism, and global exploration. We can chat together in the comments and I have fab bonuses for paid subscribers. Or, you can read new posts for free.Live Without Borders Substack
Introvert Emergency Kit
Click here if you're ready to become a less anxious, more charismatic public speaker.
When it comes to public speaking, what exactly are you afraid of?
Most people I talk to don’t explore their fears at all – and this makes them worse.
The thought of public speaking brings up such uncomfortable feelings that they try to ignore them or stuff them down – which is why they continue to suffer from speaking anxiety, one of the most common fears in the world.
How is an amorphous ‘fear of fear’ holding you back and keeping you quiet?
I’m Sarah Mikutel, your communication and mindset coach. By the end of this episode, you will know:
- what you’re really afraid of when you say you don’t like public speaking – no more amorphous clouds of discomfort,
- how anxiety manifests in our mind and body and why not managing it is so harmful,
- the beliefs underlying the four different flavors of public speaking anxiety, and
- Stoic practices you can do to let go of anxiety so you can more eloquently express your thoughts, feelings, and ideas.
So no more holding in what you want to say and then internally screaming when someone else voices what you’d been thinking. It’s time to start feeling more calm and confident when you speak.
Let’s dive in.
sarahmikutel.com
Become a member of the Live Without Borders Community ❤️
Let’s continue the conversation. Head on over to my blog on Substack for more on how to thrive through better communication, Stoicism, and global exploration. We can chat together in the comments and I have fab bonuses for paid subscribers. Or, you can read new posts for free.Live Without Borders Substack
We often hear how negative self-comparisons can be, especially when it comes to social media. But what if we could use comparison as a force for good? A tool to help us grow and flourish at work and in our personal lives? Great news, we can!
Today you’ll learn how to stop negatively comparing yourself to others and start measuring your progress in healthier and more productive ways. Plus, you’ll learn the scientific theory about why you’re actually more likable the less perfect you are. Hi, I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. Ready to take this work deeper and radically transform your life? Let's talk. Book your call here.
sarahmikutel.com
On July 25, I’m hosting a workshop on How to Fall in Love with Self-Discipline. We’ll dive deeper into the practices you can do to reign in the impulses that are blocking you. You'll walk away with a plan to overcome self-sabotage and transform your life.
Sign up for the workshop.
Registration ends July 24 so I can customize the experience for participants
Let's be real. We are smart people with an unhelpful habit of numbing out instead of taking action on our dreams.
If you relate with any of the following then listen to this episode ASAP:
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find it difficult to stay motivated and focused on goals
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tendency to give in to distractions and urges that hinder progress
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struggle with procrastination and over-indulgence in unproductive activities
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regularly break commitments to yourself but never other people
We all have our vices. That could be mindlessly eating cookies we’re not even enjoying; drinking at a party when we said we wouldn’t; turning down an invite to meet friends so you can work, and then you get distracted and don’t do anything.
You don’t have time for this anymore. Life is too short. How long will you wait before you start demanding the best for yourself?
On July 25, I’m hosting a workshop on How to Fall in Love with Self-Discipline. We’ll dive deeper into the practices you can do to reign in the impulses that are blocking you. You'll walk away with a plan to overcome self-sabotage and transform your life.
Sign up for the workshop.
Registration ends July 24 so I can customize the experience for participants
Ever been cut off mid-sentence and feel a whirlwind of emotions – frustration, anger, embarrassment? Why do we, as Enneagram 9s, take interruptions so personally, and how can we handle them with grace?
I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel, and in this episode, I dive into effective communication and mindset strategies that will help you be seen and heard. By the end, you'll be equipped to handle interruptions confidently, communicate effectively, and enjoy life with less anxiety.
https://sarahmikutel.com/
What do courage and resilience truly mean?
This Memorial Day, I reflect on the incredible bravery of the 'Greatest Generation' during World War II, drawing inspiration from my visits to historic locations such as Auschwitz andChurchill's War Rooms in London.
From blackouts to rationing, the everyday experiences of European civilians during WWII serve as a testament to human resilience.
In the film Saving Private Ryan, a dying Captain Miller says to Matt Damon's character: "Earn this." He was also speaking to us.
We have a responsibility to earn the lives that other people died for. In this episode, I talk about how we can do this by showing up as Stoic leaders and embodying courage, wisdom, moderation, and justice in our own lives.
By giving ourselves space to think and show up as our best selves, we can strive to live a life of meaning that honors the sacrifices of the Greatest Generation.
https://sarahmikutel.com/
Have you ever noticed how our thoughts and reactions can create unnecessary stress, or cultivate empathy and understanding for others?
On a recent flight to Florida, I was reminded of the power of perception and emotional resiliency.
I share the story of passengers clapping after a smooth landing, the reactions of those around me as a father rushed to exit the plane, and how the simple words of a child turned turbulence into an exciting adventure.
Inspired by the wisdom of Epictetus, we'll discuss how to be more emotionally resilient by challenging our first impressions and choosing more rational thoughts.
sarahmikutel.com
Harvard researchers have been studying what makes people happy for decades.
Since 1938, they’ve been following the same people, and then their families, to learn more about what makes a good life. This is the longest-running study of its kind involving hundreds of people across different walks of life. JFK was even involved when he was a student.
So what did they discover in this happiness survey?
Money, fame, and awards don’t lead to long-term happiness. Here’s what does — good relationships.
Think about a trip you took a few years ago. A vacation or time abroad or in a new city that you really loved. What do you remember?
When you first got home and a friend asked, “Oh, how was your time away?” chances are you recited the things you did. But years later, when you think of that trip, you remember your interactions with people, those you were traveling with and also complete strangers.
The key to the good life is developing good relationships and being open to encounters with everyone.
And there’s both science and magic behind why.
https://sarahmikutel.com/
I’m hosting a 2023 Goal-Mapping Workshop on Jan. 14. It’s free and a replay will be available for a few days after if you register in advance.
This isn’t a lecture – it’s a very interactive session. You’ll:
- Create a vision for your year that aligns with your values and priorities
- Break down your big goals into manageable tasks that don't overwhelm you
- Develop a plan of action to stay on track and avoid procrastination
- Prioritize your tasks and projects in a way that helps you stay focused and motivated
- Overcome obstacles and setbacks in a way that allows you to stay true to your values and goals
You'll leave this workshop with a clear and actionable plan for the year ahead. And you'll have the tools and strategies you need to stay focused and motivated, no matter what life throws your way.
What: 2023 Goal-Mapping Workshop
When: 10 a.m. EST, Jan. 14
How long: 60-90 minutes
Where: Online – you’ll receive a link closer to the date
How: Book your space here
Around January 1, we set goals that we intend to keep. But most of us break these vows before the month is over – why? What’s the real reason people won’t change? And how can we use Stoicism and modern psychology to start?
To truly be free and move forward, we need to cultivate helpful thoughts and let go of unhelpful ones. This is how we become resilient and learn to flow with life instead of fighting it.
But what if you’re not even aware of your unhelpful thoughts?
I’ve talked about different ways to uncover your blind spots on this podcast, and today you’ll learn about a new one from Harvard’s Robert Kegan and Lisa Laskow Lahey, authors of the book Immunity to Change.
sarahmikutel.com
What does Auld Lang Syne mean and why is its message so important?
Find out in this episode.
Also, Happy New Year! What are your intentions for this year?
https://sarahmikutel.com/
It’s that time of year when we encourage each other to slow down, appreciate what we have, and be present with others. But how do we stay in the moment when our minds keep drifting to what’s happening next week, or what occurred 10 years ago? That’s what this episode is about.
Sarahmikutel.com
“Putting things off is the biggest waste of life,” Seneca says, “it snatches away each day as it comes, and denies us the present by promising the future. The greatest obstacle to living is expectancy, which hangs upon tomorrow and loses today.” Seneca, On the Shortness of Life.
Most of us don’t follow through on our New Year’s Resolutions because we treat them like wishes and not goals. Ideally, if we want to achieve a goal, we map out a plan to achieve it and follow through. Today’s episode is about setting yourself up for success by focusing on your goals.
❤️
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
Quick reminder in case you need it…Even if you don’t feel like a particularly courageous person, you’ve acted bravely at some point in your life. Maybe you stood up for someone. Traveled solo. Moved abroad. Said no. Admitted when you were wrong. Jumped out of a plane. Cried in front of someone.
You have what it takes to show up courageously every day, but that doesn’t just magically happen. Here are four daily practices you can do to build your courage (a core Stoic virtue) and resiliency.
❤️
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
We live in an age of cowards. Of people going along with the crowd because it’s the easy thing to do. It feels safer to throw stones at the other side than it does to stand for something positive and hopeful. There’s risk in questioning things and seeking other perspectives, whereas joining in the mob costs us nothing (except perhaps our character).
Courage is about stretching out of your comfort zone and doing the right thing. You won’t always get congratulated for that, but, when it comes to helping people out, they are almost always appreciative of kind gestures.
This episode discusses what courage is and how Stoicism and the Enneagram can help us cultivate more of it. Part 2 will dive into specific practices you can do to boost your bravery and good human cred.
https://sarahmikutel.com/freedom/live-courage-stoicism❤️
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
Most of our suffering comes from thoughts that we let run wild in our brains.
We spend a lot of time each day rehashing different conversations and situations in our mind, and we think that we’re just reviewing facts. But we’re not. We’re reflecting on our own points of view, assuming what others think, worrying about the future, and ruminating about the past.
The ancient Stoics understood that our thoughts are nothing more than stories we tell ourselves.
And modern mental health professionals agree with them that we should challenge the thoughts that pop into our heads and not automatically accept them as reality.
You might be thinking, “That’s impossible. I have a million thoughts running through my mind. It’s not in my control. I’m anxious. I’m overwhelmed.”
In today’s episode, I’ll coach you on how to use a thought record to manage your mind so you can live a more resilient, calm, joyful, and compassionate life.
I can’t overstate how essential this work is to your wellbeing. If you’re feeling stressed, overwhelmed, or frustrated that the changes you’re trying to make aren’t sticking, listen to this twice.
I've also created a thought record worksheet for you.
Full show notes can be found at sarahmikutel.com
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
Janus is the Roman god of beginnings and endings, transitions and passageways, doorways and duality, amongst several other things.
And he was one of my favorite sculptures in my town’s art Triennial this year, formally known as the Creative Folkestone Triennial 2021.
High up on the East Cliff, in a little park overlooking the ocean, stood this massive head of Janus, who’s typically portrayed with two faces, one facing toward the future and the other face looking toward the past.
That's what this artwork looked like: a gleaming white, massive head of Janus with one face looking toward the harbour and the other face looking back toward the houses on the street.
The sign next to Janus said, “It looks out to sea towards Europe and inland to England, contemplating what connects us as well as what divides us. It is made of plaster and chalk and will gradually degrade and disintegrate, reflecting the gradual erosion of the coastline as well as Folkestone’s history as a fort of England.”
And he did melt away, helped along by vandals, by the time the Triennial ended this month. A pile of white dust and plaster on the green grass.
Memento mori, as the Stoics would say. We will all end up like Janus. And most of us live with that same duality: One part of us pondering the future, another replaying the past.
And we’re missing this moment. The present moment.
Let's change that.
❤️
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
A few months ago, I downloaded the Waking Up meditation app. Founder Sam Harris compares the average mind with a sky clouded with light pollution. He says that meditation is like building a telescope that can cut through that fogginess so you can access “the sky of the mind.”
And that’s what the Enneagram and Stoicism help us do, as well. Cut through the clouds to get more clarity and set us free from our patterns.
But we can’t change who we are by simply thinking about it, or passively reading a book on getting over anxiety or silencing your inner critic, or whatever patterns you’re stuck in. You have to involve both the body and the mind to create new neural pathways and if you want to make change stick.
Learn how in today's episode :)
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession Want to connect on Insta? Find me here
In my episode on Stoicism and the Art of Happiness, Donald Robertson offered some techniques we can use to manage our anger toward people who hold views that we strongly disagree with.
Today I want to talk to you about becoming more aware of your anger style, and to share more practices you can use to conquer your anger and also to learn from it. And you might learn about your partner or parent’s anger style, as well.
Because we don’t all experience anger in the same way. Some people think they never get angry.
But anger is a human emotion that we all experience, whether we realize it or not, and how we experience it depends on several factors, including our Enneagram type, level of mental and emotional wellbeing, and our personal development work.
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
For several years I've been interviewing women like myself who packed up everything to start a new adventure in another part of the world.
One of the core values that I talk about is that we will never have this day again -- make it matter. It's my softer way of saying 'If you died tomorrow, would you be satisfied with how you lived this day?'
I knew I didn't invent this way of thinking but I didn't realize that Stoics have been talking about this for thousands of years until I learned about the greatest philosopher king, Marcus Aurelius, who ruled until 180 A.D.
He said, “You could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think.” (Greg Hays translation).
Marcus wrote down many words of wisdom, and I want to share his story today because he's an ideal example of how we can all live a good life, no matter what obstacles come our way.
I'm joined again by Stoic expert Donald Robertson, author of How to Think Like a Roman Emperor, which explains the Stoic philosophy via Marcus' fascinating story. It's my favorite book on Stoicism! Get the audiobook for free if you're new to Audible by signing up for a trial at audibletrial.com/postcard
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
Even though I haven't lived in the U.S. for 10 years, I've been in Italy and England for most of this time, I still pay close attention to my home country.
At the time of this recording, it's 2020. The U.S. just ended the most contentious and vitriolic political campaign season I've seen in my lifetime.
I see the divisiveness and bitter partisanship. People are becoming more tribal. Canceling out opposing views. At the same time people seem desperate for connection and to be part of something greater than themselves.
And then I look around and see what they're gravitating toward. If they're not religious, it seems social media and YouTube are sucking them into extremist groups, gangs, and conspiracy theories.
I wondered what it would it look like if we could offer them a peaceful, compassionate, hopeful alternative idea to believe in. Then I realized this idea already exists in Stoicism, a 2,300-year old philosophy that essentially says: Live your values. Don’t worry about things that are beyond your control. Be a person of good character who looks out for other people.
It's a practical philosophy on how to live a good life and will be one of the primary ideas I'll discuss on this show. Because like the Enneagram, Stoicism gives us the tools we need to increase our self awareness, be more present, and to respond to life in a mindful way and not out of emotion or habit.
Consider this episode Stoicism 101.
I couldn't think of a better person to talk to about this than Donald Robertson, a Stoic expert and a cognitive behavioral therapist. He's written my favorite books on modern Stoicism, including Stoicism and the Art of Happiness and How to Think Like a Roman Emperor. AND, he's an expat/world wanderer: a Scotsman who moved in Canada but has been appropriately hanging out in Athens for a good part of this year.
Enjoy the show!
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
[UPDATE: I've since changed the name of my newest podcast to LIVE Without Borders, merging it with my original travel and wellbeing podcast. The purpose: Freedom is about more than getting on a plane. It’s about becoming the most heroic version of yourself. I want to help you live your best life without literal or self-imposed borders.]
Why hello there. The holiday season has just about come to an end, but I hope you are still finding time to relax this weekend.
If you’re looking for something to listen to, I wanted to let you know about my new personal transformation podcast, Part of Something Greater, a show for peacefully ambitious people who are ready for more peace, happiness, and connection in their life.
I’ll be talking a lot about raising self awareness through Stoicism and the Enneagram and while all 9 types can benefit from this show, I think it will be especially helpful for you, and you are who I had in mind when I created it.
I’m sharing one of the first few episodes of Part of Something Greater here. If you like it, you can subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts. And if you love it, please share it with a friend and consider leaving a review on Apple Podcasts.
Alright, enjoy this episode and I hope your 2021 is off to a beautiful beginning.
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
What do you do when someone takes advantage of you or tells YOU how YOU'RE feeling? You might want to cozy up in bed with a pillow on your head. But advocating for yourself and tackling the problem head on will make you feel better. You deserve to be your biggest advocate :)
Xo Sarah
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
Are you treating yourself as well as you treat your best friend?
The next time you find yourself holding back when you want to ask for help, consider how you'd respond if a friend asked the same of you.
Xo Sarah
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
Do you feel like you matter?
When I first learned about the Enneagram, I resonated with almost everything there was to say about 9s, except the idea that we think we're not important, that we don't matter.
"That doesn't resonate with me. Of course I matter," I thought.
But this weekend I've been reflecting on how I've actually lived my life and had some real moments of clarity that might help you, too.
Xo Sarah Mikutel
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
Last year around this time, I went to the beach with my mom. She was flipping through Real Simple magazine, which is our favorite beach read, and one of the articles posed this question:
“What book has had the greatest impact on your life?”
I immediately knew that the book that changed my life the most was Mindset by Carol Dweck, who is a psychologist, Stamford professor, and one of the world's leading researchers on motivation.
You heard me reference this book in the last episode.
Mindset is all about the power of believing that we can improve and the foundation of this book is that we all have either a growth mindset or a fixed mindset.
People with a growth mindset love to learn. They’re up for a challenge and know they’ll get better at something the more they work at it. They like to stretch themselves and experience new things and are open to feedback.
People with a fixed mindset think they’re born with certain abilities. They don’t want to try new things because they worry they won’t be good at them. They’re afraid to fail or that people will judge them.
Most of us have a fixed mindset! I know I did before reading this book.
But here’s the thing…you can actually change your mindset and become more open to growth and trying new things.
This is such an important message that I want to share Carol Dweck’s short Ted Talk from 2014. I hope you enjoy it.
Xo Sarah
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
Are you having a hard time getting things done?
Maybe you’re a daydreamer. Maybe something is going on with your family. Maybe you’re devastated at the state of the world. Maybe you’re happy and hopeful and jumping around from thing to thing because you’re so excited. Maybe you have ADHD like today’s guest.
I’m speaking with my friend Emily Prokop, podcast editor, host of the Story Behind, and co-host of the Hate to Weight podcast.
Emily and I have a lot in common, including being recovering research-obsessed perfectionists. That doesn’t mean we’re natural planners. We definitely fall in the daydreamer category. That doesn’t mean we don’t have big goals we want to accomplish.
Lack of focus doesn’t mean lack of ambition or lack of interest.
Today, Emily and I are sharing our favorite routines and resources to make your day more peacefully productive. We recorded this a few months ago, but the tools and tips we share are timeless. Enjoy.
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
Are you overthinking something right now and can’t seem to move forward?
I have a simple yet very powerful mindset mantra that will get you moving in the right direction: "Let Future You take care of it."
Whoah! So simple yet such a powerful mindset shift.
I heard this idea from one of my online business mentors, Elizabeth Goddard. Here's what she means by 'let future you take care of it': Have faith that Future You will have the experience and the context to make the right decisions.
So often we tie ourselves in knots about whether we should try this or that. Should I start a podcast? Should I move to Paris?
But Present You can't know the answers because you don't have the experience of trying yet.
The job of Present You is to try, experiment, and play. To take action on something now and let Future You decide if it's working, if you love it, or if you want to try something else.
Future You has more information and, therefore, more answers. Yes, Present You will help out Future You by putting in effort and doing the work. But save your worries and ‘what ifs’ for Future You to figure out.
The job for Present You is to make a decision and take the next step.
So what's your next step? What are you excited about and what's one thing you can do to move it forward?
Xo Sarah
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
Over the last few weeks, I’ve been walking around coastal England and marveling at how nature just keeps going.
The tulips here are so red and lush and full of life. The birds are singing, the sun is shining, the waves keep crashing as they always do.
They don’t pause when there's a pandemic or when there's any other type of crisis in the world.
We can learn from them.
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
Do you ever feel like you're a workaholic who never gets anything done? I felt like this for so long.
When I started my own business, I really, really struggled with moving forward and taking action. I got stuck in rabbit holes and analysis paralysis and spent so many days and nights, including weekends when I could have been seeing my friends, staying home because I had to work.
But then I would look at the clock. The entire day had passed and I couldn't point to anything that I had done that was super productive. And yet I felt burned out and like I had been working the whole time. I thought, okay, I know what the problem is, but I don't know how to pull myself out of this.
And that's when I really started to explore productivity. I watched a TED talk called How to Gain Control of Your Free Time by Laura Vanderkam, a time management expert. And I thought, wow, this woman really knows what she's talking about. Then I read her her book 168 Hours: You Have More Time Than You Think and I learned something that helped me save time by making decisions much faster.
I interviewed Laura recently for my other podcasts, and today's episode is a clip from that conversation. We discuss maximizers and satisficers, the part of her book that I found so life-changing. Take a listen and let me know if you’re a maximizer or satisficer. Find me @sarahmikutel
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
Today I’m sharing a podcast episode I did with my friend Caitlin Hawekotte, who is an MBTI® Certified Practitioner, which means that she administers and interprets the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator® assessment to help people discover more about their personality types and preferences. I actually shared this episode on both of my other podcasts because I loved it so much and I thought you might get a lot out of it, as well.
Learning how people think about and process our world, especially those who are NOT our personality type, has had a profound effect on my life, in a very positive way, and we get into that in our conversation.
As you might already know, assessments like Myers Briggs make us more compassionate because we learn how we all see the world through a different lens. We start taking things less personally because we realize that people have diverse ways of learning and working, different ranges of how much alone time we need, different ways of organizing ourselves (or not).
I asked Caitlin if she’d be up for doing some Myers Briggs coaching with us, and she said yes! I’ll share more information about that in our Facebook Group, which has the same name as this podcast, or you can just go to sarahmikutel.com/fbgroup and you’ll be directed there.
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
Hello from lock down in the UK. I’m sending you a big virtual hug wherever you are waiting out the COVID-19 coronavirus.
Do you feel like you’re the only one not losing your mind grapes right now? Or maybe you were feeling really calm, but easing the anxiety of others is weighing on you and now you’re freaking out? I imagine we’ll feel a range of emotions while sheltering at home.
As Enneagram 9s, our go-to feeling is calm, and the world needs this energy. Now is our time to step up as leaders.
When life gives us lemons, we make lemonade. We ask why things happen ‘for’ us instead of asking why things happen ‘to’ us.
To help us thrive creatively and professionally during this time, I’ve created a Facebook Group just for INFP Enneagram 9s.
This is intended as an oasis of calm for us. A place to help each other and ask questions and share ideas to help further or creativity, business pursuits, or however we want to thrive. Maybe we can do some online events together, like virtual happy hour or co-working.
You can find the group on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/groups/infpthriveforenneagram9s
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
New to Myers Briggs and the Enneagram? I am. I’ve been digging in deeper with both these assessments this year, especially the Enneagram, and I’m obsessed!
I believe personal development is essential to living a happy, meaningful life and that we should explore tools not only to understand ourselves better, but also those around us.
In this episode, I share definitions of the INFP personality type from 16Personalities, and of the 9 Type from the Enneagram Institute.
Resources
16Personalities
Enneagram Institute
Eclectic Energies
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
As INFP Enneagram 9s, we don’t always love putting ourselves out there publicly, but that doesn’t mean we’re not dream chasers.
On this episode, I share how I, as an American, achieved my dream of living abroad. It all started with me scrubbing bathtubs as a chambermaid in England, where I lived in a converted stable. Humbling for sure, but an experience I wouldn’t trade for the world.
I also get into three big life lessons that I’ve learned as an expat/entrepreneur that can apply to anyone looking to achieve more in life.
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession
Does this sound familiar?
✔️ The weekend passed by in a blur of busyness, but you’re not sure what you actually did and somehow your to-do list got longer.
✔️ You’re a rock star at helping others achieve their goals. But your dreams fall to the bottom of your priority list.
Imagine how amazing it would feel if you fought as hard for yourself as you did for everyone else.
Hi, I’m Sarah Mikutel, a clarity coach who helps Enneagram 9s replace anxiety, overwhelm, and procrastination with calm, confidence, and fast action.
I especially love helping warm-hearted go-to gals step into the spotlight and prioritize their own dreams (like living abroad, transitioning careers, and launching podcasts!).
Fun fact: I’m an American who, in 2010, moved to Italy on my own, obtained dual citizenship in two months, and have been living the expat / location independent dream ever since.
Some people have said to me, “That doesn’t seem like an Enneagram 9” (which I am). Well, surprise! Every Enneagram type is capable of living their best life when they do their inner growth work.
So this podcast is for you if...
✔️ You focus on other people’s happiness at the expense of your needs.
✔️ You’re smart and have faith in yourself. But your lack of momentum is driving you crazy.
✔️ You’re a positive person with big plans for this world. You’re looking for someone to compassionately challenge you to step up as the leader of your life and start making magic happen.
I am here for the gentle souls who are ready to shine. I’ll be sharing my own journey, as well as practical tips and deeper advice on how to interrupt the personality patterns holding you back so you can create a life that sets your soul on fire.
Follow or subscribe to get episodes delivered to your favorite podcast player.
P.S. I host two other podcasts you might be interested in
Podcasting Step by Step
LIVE Without Borders
Hello! I'm your host, Sarah Mikutel. But the real question is, who are you? Where are you now and where do you want to be? Can I help you get there?
Visit sarahmikutel.com to learn how we can work together to help you achieve more peace, happiness, and positive transformation in your life.
Book your Enneagram typing session by going to sarahmikutel.com/typingsession