Daily Pain With Jane Puncast: Recent Episodes
Jane Hillman
Welcome to the Daily Pain With Jane puncast! Our goal is to upload a quick episode every day for as long as we can, season after season. DPWJ is produced by Elle and Jane Hillman.
We’re in search for vegetable puns. Lettuce know. Hey guys! I’m glad to see y’all have made it to the end of season 3. I wanted to let you guys know that DPWJ is going to be taking a break for a little while due to the second term of school starting. As you guys already know, I’ve been way behind on episodes lately and don’t have a lot of time where I can record, edit, and upload. Hopefully I’ll be able to get caught up on school then come back soon. It was nice being here with you guys through 3 seasons! Thank you so much for sticking around!! Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me. Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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I had to put my grades up for adoption because I couldn’t raise them. Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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My friends business burned down last night. Now his business is toast. Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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People who take care of chickens are chicken tenders. Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Geology rocks, but geography is where it’s at. Hi guys! Sorry there’s no special guest today, I couldn’t find any takers. If anyone would like their pun to be featured on DPWJ, just send it in with a voice message! Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It’s very time consuming. Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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In the corn maze, I felt like I was being stalked. It was earie. Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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I can hear music coming out of my printer. I think the paper is jammin’ again.
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Do memory foam mattresses wish they could forget?
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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A man has been stealing wheels of police cars. Police are working tirelessly to catch him.
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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I made a playlist for hiking. It has music from Peanuts, the Cranberries, and Eminem. I call it my Trail Mix.
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose. Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What’s the difference between bird flu and swine flu? One requires tweetment and the other needs oinkment.
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What’s the difference between a duck? One foot’s both the same
Joke read by Grandpa Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What does Charles Dickens keep in his spice rack? The best of thymes, the worst of thymes.
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Why does Waldo wear striped shirts? Because he doesn’t want to be spotted.
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What do you call someone who doesn’t fart in public? A private tooter! Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What do you call a herd of sheep tumbling down a hill? A lambslide! Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What do you call a hen who counts her eggs? A mathmachicken! Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What time do ducks wake up? The quack of dawn! Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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I was kidnapped by mimes. They did unspeakable things to me. Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What rock group has four men and doesn’t sing? Mount Rushmore! Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What are the strongest days of the week?
Saturday and Sunday, the rest are week days.
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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If a cow doesn’t produce milk, is it a milk dud or an utter failure?
Hi guys! Glad to see you after so long! I hope you like the new cover art, Alice from Box of Books Podcast made it for me! If you like it, don't be afraid to send me or her a voice message telling us what you think!
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Hey guys! Sorry I haven’t been recording any episodes lately. I’ve been really caught up on schoolwork and haven’t been able to record at all. But get ready for season 3, which is starting TOMORROW. I hope to see you there!
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What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite! Joke read by Samuel, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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You know what’s nuts? Almonds
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Cheerful cowboys make jolly ranchers
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Do guns have a troubleshooting section?
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Never trust a train. They have loco motives
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Why does the norway navy have barcodes on the sides of their ships? So when they come back to port they can scandinavian
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Knock knock. Who’s there? Britney spears. Britney spears who? Knock knock. Who’s there? Oops, I did it again!
Joke read by Jane Hillman and Alice from Box Of Books Podcast, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What do you call a fat psychic? A four-chin teller
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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It was an emotional wedding, even the cake was in tiers
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What kind of shorts do clouds wear? Thunderwear
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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How many tickles does it take to make a squid laugh? Ten-tickles
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What do you call a belt with a clock on it? A waist/waste of time. Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Well to be frank, I’d have to change my name.
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What’s the difference between a guitar and a fish? You can tune a guitar, but can’t tuna fish.
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Whoever invented the knock-knock joke should get a no bell prize.
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Before the crowbar was invented, crows had to drink at home.
Joke read by Eliza White, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
Including voice message from BOB (Box Of Books Podcast). Feel free to send in voice messages! We will gladly add them into our episodes if you choose. If you don't want us to put it in an episode, just add that on to the end of your voice message.
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Why are skeletons so calm? Nothing gets under their skin!
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta! Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What did the rug say to the floor? I’ve got you covered Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Why did the boy throw a stick of butter out the window? He wanted to see a butterfly
Hey listeners! Just want to let you know that this is the last episode of season one of DPWJ. Season two will begin on September first with 25 more daily episodes. Thanks for sticking with us!
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What can you catch but never throw? A cold
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What did Santa say to Mrs. Claus when he saw a thunderstorm? Looks like reindeer
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What sounds like a sneeze and is made of leather? A shoe
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Why was the baby ant confused? All his uncles were ants
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick
Joke read by Jeff Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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How do you put a baby alien to sleep? You rocket
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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I went to the zoo yesterday and saw a baguette in a cage. The zoo keeper told me it was bread in captivity.
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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I went into the pet shop and asked for twelve bees. The shopkeeper counted out thirteen bees and handed them over. “You’ve given me one too many” “that one is a freebie”
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Why did the waitress get promoted? She brings a lot to the table
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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People are usually shocked when they find out I’m a bad electrician
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Why can’t a bike stand on its own? It’s two tired.
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Jane Hillman
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Did you hear about the 2 antennas that got married? The ceremony was ok but the reception was great.
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Elle Hillman
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How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Elle Hillman
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What happens if a frog’s car breaks down? It gets toad
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Elle Hillman
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**Why can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up literally everything
Joke read by Mindy Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Elle Hillman**
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**Why was the stadium so cool? Because it was full of fans!
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Elle Hillman**
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What do cats eat for breakfast? Mice krispies!
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Elle Hillman
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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck!
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Elle Hillman
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Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Dwayne
Dwayne who?
Dwayne the bathtub, I’m dwowning!
Joke read by Jane Hillman and Elle Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Elle Hillman
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Why won’t the shrimp share its treasure? Because it’s shellfish
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Elle Hillman
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What do you call a shoe made out of a banana? A slipper!
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Elle Hillman
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Why did the kids eat their homework? Because their teacher told them it was a piece of cake!
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Elle and Jane Hillman, edited by Elle Hillman
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I looked up opaque, the definition wasn't very clear.
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Jane and Elle Hillman, edited by Elle Hillman
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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
Joke read by Jane Hillman, produced by Jane Hillman and Elle Hillman and edited by Elle Hillman
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Daily Pain With Jane is a "pun"cast where we share our favorite puns and jokes.
Produced by Elle and Jane Hillman and edited by Alice Hillman, from Box of Books podcast
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