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Buckle up for the final episode of our 3-part series on purity culture! In this episode we dig into what genuine accountability actually looks like when influential Christian leaders (namely Dannah Gresh) recognize the harm their teachings have caused. Through a thoughtful discussion of repentance, public responsibility, and the lasting impact of purity culture, we continue to ask why admitting specific mistakes remains so difficult—and why doing so matters for healing and preventing future harm. Also, is Dannah’s rewrite of “And the Bride Wore White” really any better? Tune in to find out!

CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT

We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.

Find the church info page here!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Bare Marriage Episode 290 on Authoritarianism
• The free book The Authoritarians (Includes the quizzes you can take to see where you score!)
• Bare Marriage Facebook Page
• She Deserves Better
• The Whole Story resource for parents

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What does Jesus actually mean when he tells us to judge a tree by its fruit - and what happens when we apply that idea to marriage and Christian teaching? Today Joanna, our resident statistician, joins us as we dig into the biblical meaning of “good fruit,” unpack the research behind our marriage studies, and explore what trust, spiritual fruit, and decision-making have to do with one another. We also welcome Dr. Camden Morgante and discuss her amazing book “Recovering From Purity Culture”. Settle in for Part 2 of our 3-part series to kick off this new season - you don’t want to miss this one!

CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT

We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• About Josh Butler’s book “Beautiful Union”
• Our podcasts referencing Josh Butler:
  • Episode 260
  • Episode 301
• M.J. Langham Thread link
• Dr. Camden Morgante’s book, “Recovering From Purity Culture”
• Dr. Camden’s Substack
• Harmful Outcomes of Purity Culture Facebook Quotes

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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And….we’re BACK with a fresh new season of the Bare Marriage podcast! We’re kicking things off with a lively deep dive into the debate over purity culture, asking what happens when influential Christian voices revise their past teachings, redefine the terms, and rewrite the history of what they once taught. We unpack the difference between biblical chastity and shame-based purity culture, take on straw man arguments and shifting definitions, and explore how messages about sex, marriage, authority, and obligation can shape the church in ways we may not always recognize. Real change requires more than just saying something was harmful - it requires honesty, accountability, and a willingness to pursue better fruit. This is Part 1 of a 3-part series, so let’s get to it and be sure to tune in next week!

CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT

We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Friday Round-Up link on Alisa Childers
• Our statement on Shaunti Feldhahn (with links to her statement)
• Roys Report article on Sheila calling out Focus on the Family
• The Whole Story Course
• Our book, “She Deserves Better”
• Dannah’s interview with Juli Slattery
• Dannah’s interview with Focus on the Family
• Zachary Wagner’s book, “Men of Virtue”

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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In this season finale we take a dive into social media, examining the messages behind viral clips from popular marriage and church influencers, and challenge fear-based teachings about marriage, parenting, gender, and authority. Through our thoughtful (and often hilarious) analyses and lively discussion, we hope this conversation encourages you to pursue healthier, Christ-centered relationships rooted in mutual respect, truth, and genuine spiritual freedom.

CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT

We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Zachary Wagner’s Book “Men of Virtue”
• Podcast Episode 262: Problems with Marriage on the Rock by Jimmy Evans
• Episode 262 Blog Post
• Sheila’s Substack
• Alex Falcone's reel about divorce stats (he's the good one!)

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What does it actually mean to be a “good man” in today’s world—and does Christianity offer something deeper than dominance, leadership clichés, or internet manosphere culture? In this thoughtful and surprisingly hopeful conversation, Zachary Wagner joins us to unpack masculinity through the lens of the fruits of the Spirit, exploring everything from loneliness and power to marriage, self-control, parenting boys, and the modern crisis of meaning for men. Together, we challenge shallow cultural narratives and argue that true strength looks a lot more like love, service, courage, and emotional maturity than performance or control. Listen in as we propose a healthier vision of manhood for both men and the people who love them.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Zachary Wagner’s Website
• Zachary’s Book: “Men of Virtue”
• Our conversation with Zachary about his book Non-Toxic Masculinity

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What happens when you know the old “because I said so” parenting style isn’t healthy…but you also don’t want to raise entitled little tyrants? In this episode, parenting coach Wendy Snyder joins us for a deeply practical, heartfelt, (and hilariously honest) conversation about strong-willed kids, emotional regulation, yelling, boundaries, anxiety, and what healthy authority actually looks like in family life. Together, we unpack the difference between authoritarian, permissive, and powerful parenting—and why so many parents swing wildly between all three. From power struggles and picky eaters to shame spirals and unmet emotional needs, this episode is packed with compassionate, evidence-based wisdom that will leave you feeling both challenged and hopeful. If you’ve ever wondered how to parent with confidence without fear, guilt, or constant battles, this conversation is for you.

CHECK OUT OUR OCTOBER SIMULCAST EVENT

We're doing our sex talk and a one-day marriage conference! Check it out for more information.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Wendy Snyder’s Book “Fresh Start Your Family” Pre-Order Link & Bonuses
• Wendy’s Website
• Wendy’s Instagram

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What if the “Billy Graham rule” (or the evangelical distortion of it) says more about fear than integrity? In this episode, Danielle Strickland helps us unpack the assumptions behind the idea that men and women can’t be alone together—and ask whether it protects integrity or quietly reinforces suspicion, segregation, and control. Drawing on Scripture, leadership research, and real-world church experiences, our conversation explores how transparency—not isolation—is a stronger safeguard against abuse and moral failure. We also dig into how purity culture, pornography narratives, and fear-based systems shape the way we interpret opposite-sex friendships, mentoring, and authority. If you’re ready to rethink gender, leadership, and trust through a more Jesus-centered lens, this one will give you plenty to chew on.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Danielle’s Book, “Better Together”
• Danielle’s Website
• Danielle’s Substack
• “The Billy Graham Rule” aka The Modesto Manifesto
• Podcast Episode 192: How Every Young Man's Battle Makes Everything Worse:
• "Recovering From Purity Culture" by Dr. Camden Morgante
• The Whole Story courses

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Welcome to Part 2 of our breakdown of For Men Only! This episode dives headfirst into the sex chapter — and quickly exposes how shaky stats and selective storytelling create misleading narratives about libido and desire. We examine why women’s sexual desire is far more contextual — and relational — than the book admits. We unpack the myth of “on-demand” desire, challenge rigid sex rules like the 72-hour expectation, and explore why libido is far more dynamic — and human — than most advice admits. We also critique popular marriage frameworks that outsource self-worth to partners and rely on oversimplified gender stereotypes rather than evidence-based relational health. Get ready for a candid, research-informed takedown of bad advice — with a clear message: real intimacy thrives on emotional maturity, not scripts.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Our article demolishing Shaunti Feldhahn's "research" on love & respect
• One Sheet on For Women Only
• Podcast on For Women Only
• Podcast on mental load
• Our book The Marriage You Want

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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In this episode, we dive into For Men Only, by Shaunti & Jeff Feldhahn, and let’s just say…we have many thoughts! We unpack some of its core claims about gender dynamics, communication, and emotional needs. Rebecca shares how this book impacted her first few months of marriage to Connor, and not in a good way!

We address major concerns with the book’s research methods, its reliance on broad gender stereotypes, and its tendency to frame women as overly emotional and men as disengaged. While it contains one of the best descriptors we’ve seen on mental load, the Feldhahns have yet to propose workable solutions that include mutual accountability and behavioral change. Sheila and Rebecca advocate for a more nuanced, evidence-informed understanding of relationships—one that prioritizes emotional maturity, shared responsibility, and meaningful communication over simplified gender narratives. This one is worth a listen and keep an eye out for Part 2 next week!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Our article demolishing Shaunti Feldhahn's "research" on love & respect
• One Sheet on For Women Only
• Podcast on For Women Only
• Podcast on mental load
• Our book The Marriage You Want

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Send us Fan Mail

Tia Levings is back, and this time she's brought the book so many of you have been waiting for — I Belong to Me, a survivor's guide to recovery and hope after religious trauma, and the follow-up to her memoir A Well-Trained Wife.

After thousands of women slid into her DMs asking how did you heal, how do I find myself again, Tia sat down and wrote the guide she wished she'd had. In this conversation, we get into what religious trauma actually is and why therapists are only now starting to name it, how spiritual bypassing uses faith language to invalidate your pain, and why the period right after you leave a high-control church or marriage is actually when you're most vulnerable — not most free. We also talk about why your voice and your sexuality are twin wounds that heal together, how to start building boundaries when you've never been allowed to have any, and why real recovery eventually means sitting with your own complicity — not to shame yourself, but to finally choose something different. If you've ever wondered was what I went through actually trauma, and can I actually heal from it — this episode is for you.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• I Belong to Me by Tia Levings — Release Date: May 5th — Pre-Order Now!
• Listen to Tia's first episode with us on her book The Well Trained Wife

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Send us Fan Mail

Who's carrying the mental and emotional load when it comes to sex? Today Keith and I are breaking down all the ways evangelical marriage culture places that burden almost entirely on women: from appearance standards and contraception to performing passion on demand and suppressing her own emotions so his experience stays comfortable. We are listening to sermon clips and reading quotes from bestselling Christian marriage books that are pretty hard to hear, but really important to call out for the harm they cause to women (and marriage).

We are also talking about what we all actually want — a sex life rooted in real intimacy, where both people get to show up with everything they are.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• The Orgasm Course and The Husband’s Edition
• Starter Pack Podcasts on Making Sex Feel Great

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Finding a healthy church after being hurt is hard — especially when toxic churches have learned to hide what they really believe. This week, Rebecca and I walk you through our evidence-based, step-by-step method for evaluating a church's website before you ever step through the door. From homepage vibes to staff pages, statement of beliefs to membership covenants, we'll show you exactly what to look for — and what to run from.

We're also sharing real examples from actual church websites, some of them from well-known names you'll recognize, so you can train your eye to spot the difference between a church that genuinely welcomes you and one that just wants to slot you into a hierarchy. And we're connecting it all to our brand-new peer-reviewed study on internalized modesty messaging — because finding a healthy church isn't just nice to have. For girls especially, it can make all the difference.

GET OUR TEMPLATE to Vet Your Church's Website

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Our article about risk of sexual harassment in the Scientific Study of Religion Journal

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Send us Fan Mail

A close look at how Every Man’s Battle ignores the impact of predation on women and girls–and is just plain creepy! Plus a new study on hostile/benevolent sexism when it comes to tradwife content. It’s our podcast and Friday RoundUp in one!

Our podcast we wanted to air this week just wasn’t ready in time–so we decided to record our Friday RoundUp a day early, and run it as this week’s podcast. So if you’re used to listening to our podcast, remember that on YouTube every week we also have a 20 minute unfiltered, unscripted Friday Roundup!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Our post on the two Every Man’s Battle excerpts
• The Facebook post people were commenting on
• The article on the new tradwife study
• Our download on the problems with Every Man’s Battle
• Our download on the problems with Every Young Man’s Battle
• Subscribe to our YouTube channel so you don't miss all the regular Friday roundups!

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Keith and Rebecca are taking over the podcast this week and are answering your questions — from how to find a healthy church community to whether complementarianism is a dealbreaker. They're refreshingly honest and a little funny about it. Then Joanna joins to dig into a brand-new peer-reviewed paper on how internalized modesty messaging affects girls' self-esteem and their risk of being sexually harassed in church as minors. What they found is both unsurprising and deeply sobering: environments that emphasize modesty messaging don't just harm girls, they actually groom boys into predatory behavior. It's research that needs to get out of their little corner of the internet and into the broader conversation, and your support made it possible.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Love & Respect Docuseries
• Book suggestions from Rebecca: Mistborn Series by Brandon Sanderson
• Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir
• Shattered Sea Trilogy - Joe Abercrombie
• Farseer Trilogy - Robin Hobb
• (Join The Patreon for our great book club for more!)

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What does it mean to have realistic expectations of a spouse with ADHD? How does gender play into how ADHD impacts a relationship? And what do accommodations actually look like—versus what do they not look like in a healthy marriage?

This week Rebecca talks about her own diagnosis of ADHD with her father Keith (a pediatrician) and good friend Daniel Forsythe (a licensed psychotherapist who works with neurodiverse marriages frequently) to dig down to discuss what the evidence actually says is possible, the risk of “caregiver burnout”, and more as Rebecca picks the brains of the actual professionals so we can all land in an evidence-based place!

THANKS TO OUR SPONSOR:

To Heal or Harm: Scripture's Use as Poison or Medicine for Abuse Survivors by Dr. Steven Tracy. How to refute it when Bible verses are weaponized!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Study regarding impact of ADHD on women versus men in adulthood
• Write-up on how we falsely believe that ADHD is easier on women
• Study on how a messy home impacts women versus men’s social standing and who we intrinsically believe is “responsible” for cleaning
• The Marriage You Want book
• Is It You, Me, or Adult ADHD?
• A more therapeutic book about counselling practices for marriages working with ADHD:

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Send us Fan Mail

What if the reason so many women struggle with desire, arousal, and orgasm has nothing to do with their bodies—and everything to do with what they were taught before they even wanted to be sexual? In this episode, Rebecca and I pull together research and real-life stories to trace a thread that runs from how we raise our daughters, to what happens on the wedding night, to why so many women are secretly faking it.

THANKS TO OUR SPONSOR:

To Heal or Harm: Scripture's Use as Poison or Medicine for Abuse Survivors by Dr. Steven Tracy. How to refute it when Bible verses are weaponized!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work (and get access to the book club!)
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Our Orgasm Course and Boost Your Libido Course
• Love and Respect Docu-Series
• Research Paper: "Sexual Passion in Adolescence: Examining Its Transmission Through Mothers"
• Research Paper: "Do Women Withhold Honest Sexual Communication When They Believe Their Partner's Manhood Is Threatened?"
• Instagram Thread by Ally Jolie (somatic psychologist, UK)
• Podcast episode on men projecting sexual attention-seeking onto girls

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Send us Fan Mail

Jay Stringer, licensed therapist and author of Unwanted, is back to talk about his brand new book Desire: The Longings Inside Us and the New Science of How We Love, Heal, and Grow. Together, we unpack why so many of us — especially those from church backgrounds — were taught to fear and suppress our desires rather than develop them. We dig into enmeshment, the "provisional self," why differentiation is actually the secret to intimacy and a healthy sex life, and why low libido is never just a libido problem. If you've ever felt broken, empty, or like you don't even know what you want anymore, this conversation is for you.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Get Jay Stringer's book Desire
• Get Jay's book Unwanted
• Follow Jay on Instagram
• Sheila's book The Marriage You Want, and the video curriculum that goes with it

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Send us Fan Mail

Anna Rollins grew up as the kind of girl who took her faith seriously — and that's exactly why it hurt her so much. In this conversation, Anna and I dig into her memoir Famished: On Food, Sex, and Growing Up as a Good Girl, where she traces how purity culture's messages about desire, self-denial, and the body quietly fueled decades of disordered eating, compulsive exercise, and sexual pain. What strikes me most is that Anna's parents were loving, her church wasn't overtly abusive — and yet the cumulative message she absorbed was shrink yourself. I think this conversation is going to resonate deeply with so many of you.

THANKS TO OUR SPONSOR:

To Heal or Harm: Scripture's Use as Poison or Medicine for Abuse Survivors by Dr. Steven Tracy. How to refute it when Bible verses are weaponized! https://amzn.to/4rSYkZu

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Get Anna Rollins' book Famished
• Follow Anna on Substack
• Watch our Love & Respect Docuseries
• The Portuguese version of The Great Sex Rescue
• The Chinese version of The Great Sex Rescue
• The Spanish version of The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Rebecca, Joanna, and I are pulling back the curtain on what went into making the Love & Respect docuseries — including the things that didn't make the final cut.

From the bizarre Nazi torture illustration Emerson used to keep women in bad marriages, to the genuinely heartbreaking story of a little boy watching his father abuse his mother, this episode gets raw and honest about why we've been fighting this battle for seven years. We also share the stunning survey results from a church in Florida that show exactly what happens when love-and-respect-style teaching takes root in a community. And we end with a word of real hope: healthy churches exist, better books are being written, and the tide is turning.

THANKS TO OUR SPONSOR:

To Heal or Harm: Scripture's Use as Poison or Medicine for Abuse Survivors by Dr. Steven Tracy. How to refute it when Bible verses are weaponized! https://amzn.to/4rSYkZu

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Watch the Love & Respect Docuseries! Episode 1, Episode 2, and Episode 3
• Our Love & Respect hub (links to all Love & Respect articles 7 resources at bottom)
• The Substack from the Florida woman
• Subscribe to Good Fruit Faith on YouTube

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Part two of a three-part docuseries deep dive into the best-selling evangelical marriage book Love & Respect.

LOVE & RESPECT DOCUSERIES:

• Watch the video version of this
• Here's episode 1.
• To see episode 3 next week, subscribe to the Good Fruit Faith Channel

This podcast delves into what Love & Respect is based on--recycled ideas from a 1970s best-seller; faulty stats; misrepresented research--and editing the Bible.

BONUS CONTENT
Gain bonus content, full videos of the interviews and MORE if you become a patron! https://patreon.com/baremarriage

Support Good Fruit Faith, that paved the way for this project

LINKS:

• Op-ed on the history of ordination of women and the SBC
• Shaunti Feldhahn's original survey
• Double-barrelled questions
• Study on shoulder-to-shoulder communication
• The Authoritarians book
• Breakdown of Eggerichs misunderstanding marital rape and saying you can't tell if a woman is aroused
• Podcast about the mystery of a woman being "turned on"
• Dr. Shauna Springer's original PsychologyToday article

EXPERT INTERVIEWEES INFORMATION:

• Dr. Chuck DeGroat
• Dr. Shauna Springer
• Dr. Andrew Bauman
• Dr. Beth Felkner Jones and her Substack
• Jay Stringer and his book Desire

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Part one of a three-part docuseries deep dive into the best-selling evangelical marriage book, Love & Respect.

THE LOVE & RESPECT DOCUSERIES:

This is a video series, so if you want to watch it in all its glory, head over to https://youtu.be/z3EEAkjwcXA!

To see episodes 2 & 3 when they launch next week, subscribe to the Good Fruit Faith Channel

This podcast delves into the broken logic of Love & Respect, why so many people bought into it, and the truly bizarre nature of what passes for evangelical marriage advice.

Copyright Disclaimer: - Under section 107 of the copyright Act 1976, allowance is mad for FAIR USE for purpose such a as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statues that might otherwise be infringing. Non- Profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favor of FAIR USE. All DVD clips and quotes from the book are used for criticism and teaching, and therefore fall under fair use.

BONUS CONTENT
Gain bonus content, full videos of the interviews and MORE if you become a patron! https://patreon.com/baremarriage

LINKS:

• Support Good Fruit Faith
• Our paper, Sanctified Sexism
• Our one sheet on the problems with Love & Respect

EXPERT INTERVIEWEES INFORMATION:

• Chuck DeGroat: https://www.chuckdegroat.net/
• Chuck's book, "When Narcissism Comes to Church"
• Andrew Bauman: https://andrewjbauman.com/
• Andrew's book, "The Sexually Healthy Man"

Music Attribution

“In the Dark” performed by BlockBeatz/stock.adobe.com
“Romantic Smooth Rock (O Mundo Gira)” performed by Yummy Tunes/stock.adobe.com
“Gentle Relaxed Smooth Jazz (Soul Power)” performed by Tasty Tunes/stock.adobe.com

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Today I'm talking with Dr. Steven Tracy, author of "To Heal or Harm," about how scripture has been twisted to keep abuse victims trapped. We're diving into passages that discuss things like, "wives submit," "God hates divorce," and "a gentle answer turns away wrath" to show what they actually mean in context. And spoiler alert: none of them tell victims to stay in abuse. If you've ever felt like the Bible was being used against you, or if you're a pastor who wants to understand how to truly help abuse victims, this conversation is essential.

PLUS: A special announcement with Rebecca you won’t want to miss!

TO HEAL OR TO HARM: Get the book here!

COMING SOON:

Subscribe to the Good Fruit Faith channel for our Love & Respect podcast coming soon!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Mending the Soul website
• Reporting on John MacArthur excommunicating Eileen Gray for leaving her abusive husband

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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We're tackling three really problematic things that have happened recently with evangelical leaders that show just how low the bar has gotten for men. From Jonathan Podluka announcing he wants to sleep with multiple beautiful women, to pastors responding to Philip Yancey's affair by saying "it could be any of us," to Tim Challies telling people in miserable marriages to just stick it out until they die—it's all connected to this theology that refuses to hold men accountable and tells women they just need to accept it. The common thread? A theology of male hierarchy that steals intimacy from marriages, justice from victims, and Jesus from people who are hurting.

THE MARRIAGE YOU WANT:

Get our book that corrects this horrible teaching! It's got a study guide and video series too!

Subscribe to the Good Fruit Faith channel for our Love & Respect podcast coming soon!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Tim Challies' article on if you chose poorly
• My article about Philip Yancey
• My reel with the clips of Jonathan Pokluda
• Sheila's article about Jonathan Podluka’s 2023 sermon, and my new op ed
• Sarah Diefendorf's peer-reviewed article
• My recommended books on porn
• Our podcast on the 5-point complementarian plan for marriage

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Today I'm talking with Lydia Grace about her incredible new book, Bible Truth About Women. Lydia grew up in the ultra-conservative IBLP circles and went to seminary to answer her own questions about what the Bible really says about women's roles. What she discovered was shocking: there are ore than 120 misleading tactics that complementarians use to prop up male authority that simply isn't in the original Greek. This is the comprehensive resource we've been waiting for that addresses every major passage about women in one place.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Get Bible Truth about Women by Lydia Kaiser! Kindle available now, or Pre-order the paperback
• Bare Marriage podcast playlists for people getting introduced to our podcast

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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We're kicking off 2026 by teaching you how to think critically about Christian marriage and relationship advice! Rebecca and I walk through some really problematic articles and social media posts - from the Gospel Coalition's piece against therapy to Tilly Dillehay’s tandem bike marriage metaphor - and show you exactly why they make us feel unsafe. We'll teach you how to spot red flags, question who benefits from this advice, and why prioritizing your safety and discernment isn't selfish - it's Biblical.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• The Desiring God article on tandem bikes
• The Gospel Coalition article on therapy
• Our book The Marriage You Want, and the video series that goes with it
• The study on followership behaviour

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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We're coming full circle from our podcast on right-wing authoritarianism to talk about that viral Oklahoma student essay and why Christians rallying around bad arguments makes all Christians look terrible. Then Keith and I get vulnerable about how our faith has changed over the last few years—from realizing faith isn't just about beliefs, to understanding who Jesus actually called out (spoiler: not "the world"), to reframing the concept of sin as form of brokenness that God truly understands and has deep compassion for (as opposed to the angry God who is mad at us all the time). We’ll also share some of the exciting things coming in 2026!

JOIN OUR FUNDRAISING CAMPAIGN!

Help us raise money to fund our research, our new podcast docuseries, and our translation projects! Give through the Good Fruit Faith Initiative (tax deductible within the United States) or join our Patreon!

CHECK OUT THE RESOURCES MENTIONED:

• The Whole Story puberty course
• The Great Sex Rescue

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Our podcast on Right Wing Authoritarianism

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Keith and I went through 10 clips from evangelical influencers and pastors that have been driving people crazy all year. We break down why Josh Howerton's claims about conservative mental health don't hold up, why blaming women for divorce is absurd, and how complementarian teaching about male authority actually contradicts what Jesus taught.

JOIN OUR FUNDRAISING CAMPAIGN!

Help us raise money to fund our research, our new podcast docuseries, and our translation projects! Give through the Good Fruit Faith Initiative (tax deductible within the United States) or join our Patreon!

CHECK OUT THE RESOURCES MENTIONED:

• The Whole Story puberty course
• The Marriage You Want
• Our Great Sex Rescue Toolkit to respond to pastors and friends

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• 2025 study on conservativism & mental health
• The 2015 study on conservatives and happiness
• The 2021 study on women's health in sexist churches
• Our study on women's sexual health in conservative spaces
• Our podcast on why women seek divorce
• Report on Child Marriage in the US
• Report on Child Marriage in Canada
• Our article responding to Josh Howerton's claims that evangelicals have better marriages

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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It's episode 307 of the Bare Marriage podcast! Holly Fletcher joins us to talk about her AMAZING new book Missionary Kids. I devoured it in one sitting. We need to listen to the stories of these kids, because they're a microcosm of white evangelicalism!

JOIN OUR FUNDRAISING CAMPAIGN!

Help us raise money to fund our research, our new podcast docuseries, and our translation projects! Give through the Good Fruit Faith Initiative (tax deductible within the United States) or join our Patreon!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Check out Missionary Kids by Holly Berkley Fletcher
• Holly's Substack: A Zebra Without Stripes
• Holly on Blue Sky
• Instagram
• Threads
• Etsy
• Our book She Deserves Better

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Happy American Thanksgiving! We're rerunning one of my favorite episodes from four years ago where Rebecca and I talk about what God is actually like—spoiler: He laughs and takes joy in life, not just suffers on the cross. We also dive into why our Great Sex Rescue research matters and address all those critiques about our methodology (and yes, we're now peer-reviewed, so that critique doesn't really work anymore). Plus, we tackle that awful Missouri pastor story about "trophy wives" and explain why harmful marriage advice is like thalidomide—it might help some people, but that doesn't mean it's not causing serious damage to others.

THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSOR

Order Dorothy Greco's book For the Love of Women! Learn why it can feel so difficult to be female in our society, and what we can do about it.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Check out The Great Sex Rescue!
• Gretchen Baskerville's book The Life Saving Divorce
• Check out our new YouTube channel, with our five short videos you can share on key topics we keep returning to time and time again!
• Our peer reviewed article in Sociology of Religion
• A longer article I wrote on the Thalidomide analogy

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Complementarians use a lot of really nice-sounding words to describe their beliefs about gender roles, but when you actually break down what they mean, they're not talking about roles at all—they're talking about hierarchy. In this episode, Keith and I decode all the euphemisms like "different roles," "servant leadership," and "his headship is for your protection" to show what complementarians are really saying: that men should be in authority over women. The problem is, when you actually implement these beliefs in marriage, we see relationships struggle—and the statistics bear that out. And we work directly against the gospel, putting the husband in the place of Jesus.

THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSOR

Order Dorothy Greco's book For the Love of Women which just launched this week!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• "The Marriage You Want" book on Amazon, or get the curriculum and video series from Baker Books
• "The Bible vs. Biblical Womanhood" by Philip Payne
• "How God Sees Women" by Terran Williams
• Rebecca Groothuis essay on "Equal in Being, Unequal in Function"
• Previous podcast episode on John Piper's "harsh husband" advice

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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We're diving into part two of our discussion on Francine Rivers' "And the Shofar Blew.” While Christian fiction can be inspirational, this novel reinforces dangerous theology about marriage, telling abuse victims to stay and suffer "better," portraying women who report pastoral abuse as liars, and presenting an incredibly sexist view of women's roles in the church as normal and godly. Join me and my friends Merry, Sarah, and Joanna as we unpack why books like these—even though they're just fiction—profoundly shape how Christian women understand marriage, faith, and their own worth.

THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSOR

Order Dorothy Greco's book For the Love of Women which just launched this week!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Find Sarah McDugal on Facebook
• Sarah's help for women healing from betrayal trauma: www.wildernesstowild.com
• For women navigating high-conflict divorce or custody: My Freedom Navigator
• Find Dr. Merry Lin's book "Rebecoming" and listen in to her Bare Marriage podcast episode!

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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We're doing something we've never done before—looking at a Christian fiction book to explore how fiction shapes our theology of marriage. Today we're discussing Francine Rivers' "And the Shofar Blew.” We're talking about how fiction doesn't give explicit advice but still profoundly influences our worldview about faith and marriage, and how even books with problematic messages can become part of our theological foundation without us realizing it.

THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSOR

Order Dorothy Greco's book For the Love of Women which just launched this week!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Find Sarah McDugal on Facebook
• Sarah's help for women healing from betrayal trauma: www.wildernesstowild.com
• For women navigating high-conflict divorce or custody: My Freedom Navigator
• Find Dr. Merry Lin's book "Rebecoming" and listen in to her Bare Marriage podcast episode!

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Ever been told you're complaining too much about how women are treated because "things are so much better now"? Yeah, me too. In this episode, I sit down with journalist and author Dorothy Greco to talk about her new book For the Love of Women, and we dig into why sexism is absolutely still alive and well—and how it's affecting all of us in ways we might not even realize. This conversation is going to help you connect the dots, give you language to talk about it, and remind you that no, you're not crazy.

THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSOR

Order Dorothy Greco's book For the Love of Women which just launched this week!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Dorothy Greco's website
• Dorothy's Substack: "What's Faith Got to Do With It"
• The song Not All Men by Morgan St. Jean

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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We're diving into the euphemisms used in Christian marriage books and by evangelical pastors, and when you translate them into actual language, it gets real creepy real fast. From Kevin Leman's "Mr. Happy" to Josh Butler's semen theology, these authors hide harmful messages behind flowery or vague language. When authors tell women to "give him a gift" while she's bleeding heavily or recovering from childbirth, they're actually telling her to perform sex acts while in pain—and that's just wrong. Most disturbing? The euphemisms that hide sexual assault and make it sound normal.

THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSOR

Pre-order Dorothy Greco's book For the Love of Women which launches next week!

Our Courses

• Check out The Whole Story!, our puberty course for parents/kids
• Check out our Orgasm Course!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

OUR BOOKS WE MENTIONED:

• The Marriage You Want (and the new video series that goes with it!)
• She Deserves Better

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Fred Stoeker's Focus on the Family interview
• Josh Howerton and the Shady Little Girls in Miniskirts
• Our article on Josh Butler's book A Beautiful Union

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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We're celebrating episode 300 with a "Best of Becca" compilation! Rebecca and I react to her most memorable moments from the past six years of podcasting—from rabid raccoons to pooping in the shower to Gerald not being able to slay dragons. We also reflect on how the evangelical landscape has shifted since we started, why we're no longer in "please speak up" mode but in "shake the dust off your feet" territory, and how our focus has evolved from "fix the church" to "help people take radical accountability for their own health and wellbeing.”

ALL NEW Marriage You Want Video Series:

The complete Marriage You Want curriculum, with the paperback, study guide, and now small group video series!

UPCOMING EVENTS:

October 25th: Join Keith and Sheila marriage conference in Oshawa, Ontario

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

TOP 5 PODCASTS OF AL TIME:

• The Problems with Power of a Praying Wife featuring Sarah McDugal & Gretchen Baskerville
• The Problems with Every Young Man's Battle featuring Andrew Bauman & Zachary Wagner
• Groomed for an Abusive Marriage: Alyssa Wakefield's Story
• How the Authors We Critiqued Responded to The Great Sex Rescue
• The Uncomfortable Truth about Waiting for Marriage for Sex

SHEILA'S FAVOURITE PODCASTS:

• The All About Obligation Sex Podcast
• The Myth of the Magic Penis

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Does God really tell women they need to submit to abuse and stay in marriages where they're being raped and harmed? Today's interview with Dr. Helen Painter is one you need to hear—whether you're stuck in an abusive marriage getting horrible advice from your pastor, or you know someone who is. We're diving deep into what the Bible actually says about abuse and divorce, and spoiler alert: God does NOT require women to stay in abusive marriages. Please share this episode with anyone who needs to hear this life-saving truth.

CONTENT WARNING: This episode contains detailed discussion of marital rape, sexual abuse, and domestic violence

HELEN PAYNTER'S BOOK:

"The Bible Doesn't Tell Me So", from Helen's organization or from Amazon

UPCOMING EVENTS:

October 25th: Join Keith and Sheila marriage conference in Oshawa, Ontario (near Toronto!)

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Give to the Good Fruit Faith Initiative of the Bosko Foundation
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Naghmeh Panahi's Facebook Post
• The original recording of the Calvary Chapel pastor (at around 59:35)
• The Center for the Study of Bible and Violence:
• Mentioned Scholar: David Instone-Brewer (rabbinical thought on divorce)

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Two major studies today prove what we've been saying: purity culture makes people unable to recognize marital and date rape as actual rape, and male porn use hurts women regardless of their attitude toward it—though religious women suffer more because of the scripts we've been given. Then I interview Joash Thomas about his book The Justice of Jesus, where he explains how Western Christianity lost biblical justice because colonizers taught a purely "spiritual" gospel to benefit themselves. We've got to understand that following Jesus costs us something!

EVENTS

• October 4th: Book launch for "The Justice of Jesus”
• October 25th: Keith and Sheila marriage conference in Oshawa

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• The Justice of Jesus book
• The study of purity culture and rape myth acceptance
• The study on how religious women see porn
• Sheila's list on recommended books on porn recovery
• For Our Daughters Film

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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It's The Great Sex Rescue--but for parenting!

The Christian parenting industry has been feeding us garbage for decades, and Keith and I sat down with Marissa Burt and Kelsey Kramer McGinnis, authors of "The Myth of Good Christian Parenting," to talk about how we got here.

THE MYTH OF GOOD CHRISTIAN PARENTING

Pre-Order the book now--and claim your amazing pre-order bonuses!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Instagram: @mburtwrites | @kelseykmcginnis
• Threads: @mburtwrites | @kelseykmcginnis
• Facebook: @mburtwrites | @kelsey.kramermcginnis
• Bluesky: @mburtwrites | @kkramermcginnis
• TikTok: @mburtwrites | @kelseykmcg
• Substack: @mburtwrites | @kelseykramermcginnis
• YouTube: @mburtwrites
• Website: Marissa
• My article on spanking and sexual arousal
• My article on the research on spanking effects
• The article about those who hid Jews during the Holocaust

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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We all want to raise kids without sexual hang-ups, but a lot of Christian parents are accidentally creating the very problems they're trying to avoid. Rebecca and I dive into the three biggest ways this happens: being way too open about your own sex life with your kids (no, they don't need to know what you and your husband did last night), making a federal case out of normal teenage sexual development like masturbation, and approaching pornography with so much shame and "sin talk" that you actually make the problem worse. But here’s the good news: our course, The Whole Story, will give you the tools and language to appropriately talk about all of these things!

Then Keith joins me to tackle that age-old marriage question about whether wives just need to have more sex to make husbands nicer - spoiler alert: you're asking the wrong question entirely, and obligation sex isn't going to save your marriage.

THE WHOLE STORY COURSE!

Check out our sex and puberty course--it's on sale until Monday September 22 at midnight!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Our books She Deserves Better, The Great Sex Rescue, and The Marriage You Want

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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We're constantly told that more sex will fix our marriages, but the research tells a completely different story. When couples are simply told to increase frequency without addressing quality, satisfaction, and women's actual experiences, it often backfires and decreases desire altogether. The real predictor of marital happiness isn't how often you're having sex—it's whether that sex is mutually satisfying, intimate, and pleasurable for both people. Unfortunately, evangelical sex advice keeps pushing obligation sex messages that treat women's exhaustion and needs as obstacles to overcome rather than valid concerns. It's time we start asking better questions about what makes sex actually good instead of just demanding more of it.

OUR SPONSOR:

Check out the book Better Ways to Read the Bible--to transform the way you see Scripture, and let it come alive again if it's been used as a weapon against you.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• The Orgasm Course
• Psychology Today article on sexual frequency and happiness
• Focus on the Family State of Marriage in America survey
• The Whole Story puberty course for kids (coupon code: PODCAST)
• Our reel about the 24 hour rule

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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I brought together three dear friends to have an honest conversation about perimenopause and menopause because so many of you have been asking about it. We shared our real stories and talked about the challenges like brain fog, weight changes, and sexual adjustments, and my dry eyes that nearly drove me crazy! But here's what I want you to know: menopause isn't just about suffering through symptoms. Each of us found our voices during menopause, finally standing up in toxic relationships and getting angry about toxic teachings we’d tolerated for years.

OUR SPONSOR:

Check out the book Better Ways to Read the Bible--to transform the way you see Scripture, and let it come alive again if it's been used as a weapon against you.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• The Orgasm Course
• Merry Lin's book Rebecoming
• Merry Lin's LinkTree
• Merry's Bare Marriage podcast episode with me
• Kelita Haverland's song The Strong One
• Rosemary Flaaten's program at The Center for Healthy Relationships
• The We Do Not Care Club video

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What do you do when you WANT to love the Bible, but you find yourself feeling defeated, hopeless, unseen? What if all the things you’ve experienced in church and in the wider Christian community have left you feeling adrift when you open Scripture? Zach Lambert’s new book Better Ways to Read the Bible shows us that everything we’ve been taught about the Bible may actually be new ways to read it—that miss the whole point! This encouraging conversation encourages us to get back to seeing the Bible through the lens of Jesus.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Zach Lambert’s book Better Ways to Read the Bible
• Zach's Substack: Public Theology
• Social media: @ZackwLambert on all platforms
• The Whole Story course - Bare Marriage's puberty/sex education course for parents
• Free book studies for "The Great Sex Rescue" and "She Deserves Better"
• Restore Austin - Zach's church in Austin, Texas

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Recently Sheila was on the Three Percent podcast, talking about what healthy marriage looks like. The hosts asked Sheila questions a lot of skeptical men had—so we thought the bigger Bare Marriage universe needed to hear this! Listen in as they play devil’s advocate, and ask the questions so many men have when they hear what we say about libido, about mental load, about porn, and more! Let’s change the convo in a healthy way. And thanks to the Three Percent podcast for letting us share this recording!

CHECK OUT OUR COURSES:

• The Orgasm Course
• Boost Your Libido
• The Whole Story to teach your kids about sex & puberty

LINKS MENTIONED:

• The 3% Podcast:
• Our new FREE book studies for She Deserves Better and The Great Sex Rescue

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Sheila Wray Gregoire interviews Professor Neil, a popular social media creator who critiques toxic masculinity and problematic topics he finds in the manosphere. They discuss how certain Christian pastors and influencers spread harmful messages about gender roles, sex, and marriage that mirror incel ideology. Through reviewing harmful clips from pastors Josh Howerton & Josh McPherson, professor Neil shares his approach to changing minds through facts and research.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

FIND PROFESSOR NEIL:

• Instagram
• Tiktok
• Facebook
• youTube
• Substack
• Main website

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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How do we reach people still in evangelicalism about toxic teachings? I read an amazing book called On Authoritarians by Bob Altemeyer which talks about how people get to be authoritarian, and the nature of authoritarians. And then shows (horrifyingly) how evangelicalism overlaps with authoritarianism! These insights can actually help us learn how to reach people still wading in toxic teachings!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

BOOKS MENTIONED:

• The free book The Authoritarians (includes the quizzes you can take to see where you score!)
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's/Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex (great for bridal showers!)

OTHER LINKS MENTIONED:

• Podcast with Terran Williams
• Podcast with Marg Mowczko
• Our toolkit to use to talk to friends/pastors about our findings

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Marriage You Want and the Study Guide
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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In this season finale of the Bare Marriage Podcast, Rebecca, Joanna, Connor, and Josiah discuss the powerful benefits of reading fiction for personal growth, empathy development, and critical thinking. They share their personal journeys back to reading after University & adult life interrupted their childhood love of books, explore scientific research on how fiction affects the brain, and provide practical advice for getting back into reading. The episode concludes with an inspiring poem about women's value and calling by Porsche Vu (The Poetic Activist).

BECOME ONE OF OUR MONTHLY DONORS:

We're aiming for 50 new monthly donors, for even as little as $10 a month! For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation

KEEP UP WITH SHEILA THIS SUMMER:

Join my Substack! It's free.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Porsche Veu on Instagram (The Poetic Activist), and her reel

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Is sex is a human need within marriage? Let's address the tension between those who see "need" language as potentially coercive and those who feel legitimate sexual desires shouldn't be shamed. Psychological research does classify sex as a human need, but the real issue is how couples can co-create a reality for a mutually satisfying sexual relationship. Rather than pressuring reluctant partners, couples should focus on building marriages where both people genuinely want and enjoy sexual intimacy.

BECOME ONE OF OUR MONTHLY DONORS:

We're aiming for 50 new monthly donors, for even as little as $10 a month! For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation

KEEP UP WITH SHEILA THIS SUMMER:

Join my Substack! It's free.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• "Diamonds are forever and other fairytales" study from 2015
• Podcast with Beth Allison Barr and Miranda Zapor Cruz that debunked the father influence statistic
• Check out our Orgasm course and our Boost Your Libido course
• Download our 12-point rubric and scorecard for healthy sexuality

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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In this episode of the Bare Marriage Podcast, I am talking with Biblical Greek scholar Marg Mowczko about the true meaning of "headship" in the Bible. Marg reveals that the Greek word "kephale" (head) doesn't typically mean "leader" or "authority" in ancient literature, and that no verse actually commands men to lead their wives. Instead, head-body metaphors are used in Scripture to describe unity and mutual care and as a picture of growing into the likeness of Christ for ALL Christians. Together, Marg and I talk about the Biblical evidence of Paul's support for women in ministry roles. We also take a moment to discuss the best Bible versions for more accurate translation in key passages about submission and hierarchy.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED

• Marg’s website
• Marg’s patreon
• Marg’s blog post on the best Bible version
• Everything on 1 Corinthians 11
• Everything on Ephesians 5

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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After a recent social media AMA, we noticed a ton of you wanted us to tackle dating - red flags, green flags, how to choose a great partner. Rebecca and I have been avoiding this topic since we both married young and have limited adult dating experience, but we DO have evidence-based research to share. We're addressing why we need to stop telling singles "God is just teaching you patience" (it's a numbers game!), the "Burn the Haystack Method" for online dating, why some might need to relocate for better options, and the hard truths about red flags versus settling. Fair warning: we're going to make some people uncomfortable, but if you want research-backed advice over platitudes, this episode's for you.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED

• Dr Jennie Young & The Burned Haystack Method
• Our podcast on why Evangelical Women aren't marrying evangelical men
• Join my Substack to keep up with us while the blog is on hiatus for June and July

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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“Soul ties” refers to the belief that when you have sex with someone, you are now joined in the spiritual realm, and that “tie” impedes your ability to ever experience freedom if you marry someone else. Often people claim you have to go through a specific prayer to break the tie, or an exorcism. But is this idea biblical? And does it help or hurt? Today Joanna Sawatsky shares our results of believing in soul ties, and we discuss different ways to talk about heartache and trauma.

PRODUCT HIGHLIGHT:

• Our puberty course The Whole Story
• Join my Substack!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED

• Our book She Deserves Better
• My series on Soul Ties
• John Eldredge’s Podcast series on Soul Ties
• Lisa Bevere Reel with misinformation
• The domestic violence website with steps from breaking trauma bonds

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Let's take a close look at the book His Needs, Her Needs by Willard Harley! Bethany Jantzi and Ngina Otiende join me to look at some of the things that we find problematic about the book--and explain why evangelicalism needs better resources!

RESOURCES:

Get our one-sheet download on His Needs, Her Needs

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS

• Find Ngina Otiende on Facebook, Instagram, and at her website Intentional Today
• Find Bethany Jantzi on Instagram and at her website Free from Control
• Check out our newest book The Marriage You Want, with stats about what really builds intimacy
• Download our rubric on how His Needs, Her Needs (and other books!) scored on sex

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What happens when church doesn’t seem safe? Or when, in retrospect, you realize it wasn’t, even if you threw yourself into it at the time? Today Dr. Andrew Bauman joins us to talk about his new book Safe Church, and then Rebecca and Sheila read reader’s stories about how the church stole their sex lives—and what we can do about it.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS

• Andrew Bauman’s book Safe Church
• Andrew Bauman on Facebook
• Andrew’s guest post on Safe Church
• Courses:
  • Our Puberty Course (The Whole Story)
  • Our Orgasm Course
  • Our Libido Course
• My blog series on sexual recovery
• Our book The Great Sex Rescue
• Our book She Deserves Better
• Our Good Girl’s/Good Guy’s Guides to Great Sex (great for engaged couples)

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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It's time to walk through some super interesting studies that have recently been published--and see what they say about the intersection of infidelity and beliefs in male hierarchy. Keith joins Sheila to react to the studies!

OUR SPONSOR:

Thank you to our sponsor, Zondervan and the book Saving Face. The church needs to get away from harmful tropes, and call us towards true community based on vulnerability and safety. Aimee Byrd points the way!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• The Marriage You Want
• Study on how affairs aren't linked to sex frequency, and the post about it
• Study on how sexism affects infidelity
• Power to Flirt Study
• Differences in Solitary vs. Dyadic Sexual Desire study
• Study on Heroism by Gender
• The IFS World Map 2019 (abuse stats are on pp. 35&36)
• John Piper on how complementarianism protects women, and Rachel Held Evans' response

OTHER RESEARCH DEEP DIVE PODCASTS:

• Pink and Blue Brains? What the research says about gender and brain differences
• Why Sex Is Like Chef Boyardee
• New Research on Obligation Sex
• New Research

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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It's an Ask Me Anything episode! Keith and I open talking about the viral video where a woman claims that she felt called by God to iron her husband's clothes before he left for the weekend to be with his mistress. And then Rebecca and I answer your questions about drawing boundaries, dating, protecting kids from abuse in church, and more!

OUR SPONSOR:

Thank you to our sponsor, Zondervan and the book Saving Face. The church needs to get away from harmful tropes, and call us towards true community based on vulnerability and safety. Aimee Byrd points the way!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Our book She Deserves Better
• Our new book The Marriage You Want
• Last week's podcast on rumination and our one-sheet download for The Love Dare

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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The Love Dare, based on the movie Fireproof, has been a huge best-selling marriage book for two decades. But does it actually contain good advice? Today on episode 280 of the Bare Marriage podcast, we show how The Love Dare simply regurgitates all the typical harmful evangelical marriage advice, telling women to make themselves smaller; never bring up issues; paper over problems; and, of course, never divorce, even if you’re being abused.

OUR SPONSOR:

Thank you to our sponsor, Zondervan and the book Saving Face. The church needs to get away from harmful tropes, and call us towards true community based on vulnerability and safety. Aimee Byrd points the way!

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS MENTIONED:

• Our Harmful Materials stickers to put on your problematic books
• All of our one sheets:
• Our new book The Marriage You Want
• Join Sheila on her social media channels: Instagram, YouTube, Threads, Facebook
• Our podcast on forgiveness after trauma

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What if vulnerability and authenticity are vital for true community? And what if we can never truly know God, and each other, until we know ourselves? It's episode 279 of the Bare Marriage podcast, featuring Aimee Byrd talking about her new book!

• Aimee Byrd's Book Saving Face
• Aimee Byrd's Substack

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS TO THINGS MENTIONED:

• Our new book The Marriage You Want

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Al Mohler, president of Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, recently did a podcast bemoaning the fact that young women, unlike young men, are giving up on the "creation order" and abandoning marriage. But he distorts the argument, and misses the main problem: Women want to get married, but too many of the men available don't make good partners.

WITH THANKS TO OUR SPONSOR:

Beth Allison Barr's insightful and important new book Becoming the Pastor's Wife: How Marriage Replaced Ordination as a Woman's Path to Ministry. Learn how women got pushed out of ministry positions in favour of marriage, and what we can do about it.

My recent article about Becoming the Pastor's Wife

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS TO THINGS MENTIONED:

• Our new book The Marriage You Want
• Al Mohler's "Briefing"
• The original Wall Street Journal Article: American Women Are Giving up on Marriage
• European study about fertility and attitude towards household tasks
• Time study about mothers based on marital status

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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So many evangelical pastors teach that men are rational while women are emotional. But is this true? And if women are more emotionally mature than men, then doesn't that mean that men need to learn from women? Listen in as Keith and Sheila dissect several clips from Josh Howerton, Emerson Eggerichs, Josh McPherson, and Matt Walsh.

WITH THANKS TO OUR SPONSOR:

Beth Allison Barr's insightful and important new book Becoming the Pastor's Wife: How Marriage Replaced Ordination as a Woman's Path to Ministry. Learn how women got pushed out of ministry positions in favour of marriage, and what we can do about it.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS TO THINGS MENTIONED:

• Our new book The Marriage You Want
• Open letter to Focus on the Family
• Our one-sheet download on the problems with Love & Respect
• Emerson Eggerichs’ sermon dissection and the podcast that goes with it
• Carolyn Custis James' Maelstrom
• Josh Howerton clip
• Matt Walsh post
• Our podcast on emotions with Becky Castle Miller

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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We know watching porn is wrong--but are romance novels just as bad? We've often heard that comparison made: Sure, guys watch porn, but remember that women read novels! Today Rebecca and I talk about when the comparison may be fair, and when it isn't. And we ask: how should we see romance novels or erotic novels? Listen in and see what you think--as we try to reason it through!

WITH THANKS TO OUR SPONSOR:

Beth Allison Barr's insightful and important new book Becoming the Pastor's Wife: How Marriage Replaced Ordination as a Woman's Path to Ministry. Learn how women got pushed out of ministry positions in favour of marriage, and what we can do about it.

And join Beth Allison Barr and Karen Swallow Prior and me for a FREE webinar TONIGHT, March 27, at 9 pm EST. Registration is FREE.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS TO THINGS MENTIONED:

• Our new book The Marriage You Want
• Our puberty course for parents to talk to kids about puberty and sex: The Whole Story
• Study that Rebecca mentioned about dark romance
• Study on how reading erotica can change our behaviour

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What if marriage replaced ordination as a woman's path to ministry? What if we've systematically erased the stories of women ministering in the past, and in so doing silenced women's voices and removed opportunities to serve Jesus? Today Beth Allison Barr joins us to talk about her new book Becoming the Pastor's Wife!

REGISTER FOR OUR FREE WEBINAR
Join Beth Allison Barr, Sheila, and Karen Swallow Prior on Thursday, March 27 at 9 pm for a FREE webinar (recording will be available afterwards if you can't make it live).
Register here

BECOMING THE PASTOR'S WIFE
Find the book here

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED IN THE PODCAST

• Our new book The Marriage You Want (read the Amazon reviews!)
• Everywhere you can get it
• Keith's series on The Danvers Statement
• Our Podcast on the Danvers Statement
• Beth's original podcast with us about The Making of Biblical Womanhood:

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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The Marriage You Want is LIVE! Our book launched this week, and in this week's podcast we take a broad, investigative look into the state of evangelical marriage publishing, and why there has very little change in the top 10 books in decades. Plus what it means to have SAFE and HEALTHY marriage advice! Come celebrate with us in episode 274 of Bare Marriage!

THE MARRIAGE YOU WANT

• Order it on Amazon
• Other places to buy!

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED IN THE PODCAST

• Download our healthy sexuality rubric and see how the bestselling marriage books fared!
• Our podcast on the 5 faulty premises of Christian books
• Our analysis of the Christian marriage publishing industry

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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It's episode 273 of the Bare Marriage podcast! We found that certain beliefs are correlated most with emotional immaturity--passive aggressiveness; outbursts of anger; emotional dysregulation. In our research for our book The Marriage You Want, we found that when couples believe the husband should have the tie breaking vote, they score lower on maturity.

Is this because emotionally immature people are drawn to these beliefs? Or do these beliefs hamper maturity? Today we talk about why it's actually both, and what that means for our own personal responsibility.

THE MARRIAGE YOU WANT

• Order it on Amazon
• Other non-Amazon links!
• Send your pre-order receipts to preorder@marriageyouwantbook.com to get our pre-order bonus!

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED IN THE PODCAST

• Download our healthy sexuality rubric and see how the bestselling marriage books fared!
• Check out our post on why complementarianism is linked to emotional immaturity and toxic church cultures

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What if the "acts of service" love language is masking something else--the totally unequal division of labor that many couples have, and Gary Chapman ignores? Plus does the "physical touch" love language mask something wrong in the bedroom? ALL NEW BONUS STATS today! Some of them aren't even in the new book!

PREODER THE MARRIAGE YOU WANT

• Pre-Order on Amazon
• Get other links to Pre-Order
• Send in your preorder receipt to preorder@marriageyouwantbook.com

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED

• Our post about the study showing that the love languages are junk science

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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PREODER THE MARRIAGE YOU WANT

• Pre-Order on Amazon
• Get other links to Pre-Order
• Send in your preorder receipt to preorder@marriageyouwantbook.com

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Prioritizing your marriage can be tough. How do we spend enough time together? Do we need more date nights? And MOMS—don’t forget to be a wife first and a mom second! But in all this talk, are we missing the bigger point? If we’re functioning as a team, doing life together, then affection will grow. But if you see your kids as threats to your marriage, or think you can connect with a date night when you haven’t been in the trenches together all week, you’re not going to feel close. A new way of thinking about prioritizing your relationship—without the GUILT! Based on new stats from The Marriage You Want! PREODER THE MARRIAGE YOU WANT

• Pre-Order on Amazon
• Get other links to Pre-Order
• Send in your preorder receipt to preorder@marriageyouwantbook.com

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Ever tried to find a compromise when you’re having an argument—but even the compromise doesn’t seem fair? In today’s podcast we explain why—using what we call The Marriage Hierarchy of Needs. We talk about this in our new book The Marriage You Want! Basically, compromise only works if you both start off on equal footing. But if one of you is already doing more than their fair share, compromise just makes it even more unequal. So let’s talk about foundation vs. frills, how to overcome entitlement, and why unfairness can’t go on forever! PREODER THE MARRIAGE YOU WANT

• Pre-Order on Amazon
• Get other links to Pre-Order
• Send in your preorder receipt to preorder@marriageyouwantbook.com

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What is the biggest key to a great marriage? Teamwork! Let’s talk about how teamwork is associated with all the good outcomes we want for marriage—better sex; feeling close; resolving conflict—everything! But complementarianism, on the other hand, is associated with all the bad outcomes. Good outcomes and bad outcomes tend to travel together—and complementarianism travels with the bad stuff! Hear about all our new data from our new book The Marriage You Want!

**LINKS

PREODER THE MARRIAGE YOU WANT**

• Pre-Order on Amazon
• Get other links to Pre-Order
• Send in your preorder receipt to preorder@marriageyouwantbook.com

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED IN THE PODCAST

• Reel from BrandonTalksMarriage
• Our reel on whether women want leaders or someone to take initiative
• The podcast that reel was based on (Marriage on the Rock)
• The Gospel Coalition reel about doing “risky” things
• The original podcast where Cynthia Westfall appeared

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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In our research looking at marital and sexual satisfaction among evangelicals, we’ve found that over and over again our best-selling books, and our megachurch pastors, teach things that are shown to lead to worse outcomes. Why? What’s going on? In today’s podcast we share the faulty premise that is at the heart of evangelical marriage advice, and the four toxic teachings that flow from that false premise. But when we fix that first premise—then our advice can finally get healthy (and Jesus-centered!)

LINKS

• Pre-Order The Marriage You Want!
• Pre-Order on Amazon
• Get other links to Pre-Order
• Send in your preorder receipt to preorder@marriageyouwantbook.com

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED IN THE PODCAST

• Access our rubric scoring the various best-selling marriage and sex books
• Our podcast talking about the problems with the “research” supporting Love & Respect
• Our podcast with the issues with Marriage on the Rock
• The Voddie Baucham clip
• Our round up of the issues with the book The Excellent Wife
• The Jimmy Evans clip
• The Tim Keller clip
• The Lisa and Francis Chan clip #1
• The Lisa and Francis Chan clip #2

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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The idea that men need respect while women need love has been treated as gospel truth in the evangelical world. Best-sellers have been written based on it; it informs almost every marriage sermon. What if it’s not true? Using data from our marriage survey of 7000 people, we show how reality is very different—and what this means for how we should talk about marriage!

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS

• Pre-order The Marriage You Want! https://amzn.to/3YQfqMy
• Send your pre-order receipts to preorder@marriageyouwantbook.com to get our pre-order bonus and an invite to the launch team!

THINGS MENTIONED IN THE PODCAST

• Take our marriage survey yourself as a date night!
• Our synopsis of everything wrong with Love & Respect (with other posts and podcasts linked in the bottom)
• Our open letter to Focus on the Family
• Jonathan Pokluda clip
• Female Influencer clip #1
• Female influencer clip #2
• Josh and Jana Howerton
• Josh Howerton “Give him a crown”
• Steve Gaines’ sermon on respect

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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So many of us got sucked into believing toxic stuff about marriage and sex in the evangelical church! But unless we figured out WHY we believed that, we’re likely to get suckered in again to toxic stuff—just DIFFERENT toxic stuff. So today, Rebecca and I are doing a postmortem, looking at what it is about church that leaves us vulnerable to believing things that are toxic and rather easy to see through. Let’s become critical thinkers, so we don’t get sucked in again!

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS

• The Marriage You Want. You can preorder it here!
• Send your pre-order receipts to: preorder@marriageyouwantbook.com The preorder bonuses and invites to the launch team will be sent out next week.
• Check out our new plans for 2025, with links to all our social media channels
• The Great Sex Rescue--the Kindle sale is over but the paperback's on sale!
• Focus on the Family posts about Jane and John

Support the show

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, social media, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Our big announcement: We’re peer-reviewed! Our dataset for The Great Sex Rescue has now appeared in the November 2024 Sociology of Religion Journal. So let’s talk about what we found, but also ask: why are evangelicals so quick to dismiss science, but at the same time cling to bad interpretations of data if it suits their agenda? Can we become better critical thinkers?

COMING IN 2025

Pre-Order The Marriage You Want

Join our email list to be notified about the launch team

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS TO THINGS MENTIONED:

• Our journal article Sanctified Sexism
• The Great Sex Rescue (our book using this dataset)
• Lisa Bevere Reel with misinformation
• Fact Checking her claims
• Shaunti Feldhahn claiming Christian researchers can’t be peer reviewed
• Podcast where we dissected one of Shaunti Feldhahn’s survey questions
• Dissecting another survey question
• The One Sheet of the problems with For Women Only
• Shaunti Feldhahn’s Statement about Us
• Our statement in response
• Analysis of Shaunti Fe

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Advent is normally a time of hopeful expectation. But what does it mean when our hopes have been dashed in the past? Stephanie Duncan Smith shares her stories of miscarriages and losses—as well as great celebrations, and what it means to embrace a life that is really messy. And we look at how we can celebrate the Incarnation by being Jesus’ hands and feet, seeing the work fighting sex trafficking that The Well House is doing. It’s the Christmas season, everyone!

Stocking Stuffers:
Check out our biblical womanhood line of merch, or our Prayer and Tent Pegs lines! They're wonderful with mugs, notebooks, stickers, tshirts and more!

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED

• Find Even After Everything
• Donate to The Well House
• Donate to the work we do! Help us meet our 2025 goals. Get a tax-deductible receipt for donations within the US
• Or, if you’d rather, join our Patreon and support us that way, while getting access to an exclusive Facebook group, unfiltered podcasts, and more!

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Jimmy Evans started XO Marriage over 30 years ago, and his book Marriage on the Rock became a best-seller. He leads marriage conferences around the country. But for years he also Mark Driscoll on his leadership team. He got his start at Gateway Church under Robert Morris, who has been accused of grooming and sexually abusing a teen girl, starting when she was 12. And more recently audio of Evans’ bullying behavior has dropped. So let’s examine his book Marriage on the Rock—and we’ll find that he stresses one-sided sex as obligation; says dangerous things about abuse; and expects women to shoulder the mental and emotional load for the family.

Our Sponsor:

Ever, AJ: Uniquely crafted vegan leather Bible cases.
These Bible Cases are GORGEOUS and FUNCTIONAL! Use it as a traditional case, or you can also buy purses and wristlets. Makes a great gift too!

Stocking Stuffers:
Check out our biblical womanhood line of merch, or our Prayer and Tent Pegs lines! They're wonderful with mugs, notebooks, stickers, tshirts and more!

LINKS: Get Our One Sheet Download of Marriage on the Rock

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED:

• The audio of Jimmy Evans’ bullying behavior in the Daystar meeting
• Evidence of Mark Driscoll being on the leadership team at XO Marriage

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Ever feel like your body is a stranger to you? Like you’re plagued with insecurity, can’t find peace in your relationships? What if it’s because we’re running away from part of who we are, and we haven’t been able to honor who God made us to be? Christy Bauman, a licensed therapist, noticed in her counseling that her clients often didn’t have a clear identity or were able to articulate who they were. So she invites us on a journey of recovering rites of passage—where we honor sacred moments in our lives, honor our birthright, honor who God made us to be. We honor the good and the bad; we lament what is lost but we celebrate what we’ve achieved. And when we’re able to do these things, we can finally be comfortable in our own skin! Join us for this deep and personal conversation.

OUR SPONSOR:

Ever, AJ: Uniquely crafted vegan leather Bible cases. These Bible Cases are GORGEOUS and FUNCTIONAL! Use it as a traditional case, or you can also buy purses and wristlets. Makes a great gift too!

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

• Christy Bauman’s book Her Rites
• Find Christy, her book, and the songs
• Great Sex Rescue is on for under $10 on Amazon right now! (who knows how long that will last?)
• Our peer reviewed article in the Sociology of Religion journal

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Gisele Pelicot famously said that "shame must switch sides"--and I think that applies to the evangelical church! Over and over again over the last few years ,when male teachers have presented a pornified view of sex and women have said "no", women have been accused of being prudes. But it is okay to reject objectification. A close look at Josh Butler, Gary Thomas coercing women into sending nude photos, and more--all of whom called us ashamed of sex for saying no.

SPECIAL: The Great Sex Rescue is on major sale on Amazon right now! Get it here

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED:

• Ngina Otiende’s initial article about Gary Thomas
• Our review of Gary Thomas’ book Married Sex
• My original article about how Married Sex coerces nude photos
• Our podcast where we talked about Gisele Pelicot
• The Male Centric Sex podcast
• Theology in the Raw episode with Josh Butler
• Brett McCracken about Josh Butler
• Twitter thread with Gary Thomas
• Juli Slattery’s article quoting me

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Do you find yourself in constant power struggles with your kids? Do you feel like your kids too often set the terms of their cooperation? Or are you worried that you are too hard and demanding on them?

Well today I talk with Wendy Snyder, a positive parenting coach, as we get into the nitty gritty of how to find that balance between being authoritarian and overly permissive. Cut the drama, cut the power struggles, and learn how to thrive as a family!

SIGN UP for our FREE Parenting Webinar with Wendy! The Compassionate Discipline Workshop, Tuesday November 19 at 1 pm EST!

THINGS MENTIONED

• Wendy's Website, Fresh Start Family
• Find Wendy on Instagram
• Listen to our last podcast with Wendy, Parenting without Yelling

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Why are writers for The Gospel Coalition coming after the dad in the cartoon series Bluey? He’s an involved dad who loves his kids. Why are they so offended? Rick Pidcock joins Rebecca and Connor Lindenbach for a deep dive—and then Rebecca and Connor talk more about our anemic view of fatherhood.

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

Things Mentioned

• Rick Pidcock’s article about coming after Bluey
• Jeremy Pryor’s article about Bluey turning fathers into mothers
• Rick Pidcock's blog

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Christa Brown was sexually assaulted dozens of times by her youth pastor when she was 15. She was made to repent and apologize to his wife. The pastor just got moved around from church to church for decades. When Christa’s daughter reached the same age Christa was when she was assaulted, she went public—and started the movement to push the SBC towards accountability for the sexual abuse crisis in their midst. She’s written a memoir called BaptistLand, and today we talk about Christa’s fight—and how SBC megachurch pastors today are still demonizing “little girls” rather than holding men accountable.

THINGS MENTIONED IN THE PODCAST: Pick up our Great Sex Rescue Tookit—to help start important conversations to those close to you

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

IMPORTANT LINKS:

• Christa Brown’s book BaptistLand
• Christa on Twitter
• Christa on Substack
• Read the Guideposts report
• The original Houston Chronicle article
• News article about the amicus brief filed by SBC entities AGAINST a sexual assault victim
• Josh Howerton sermon clip
• See the documentary For Our Daughters
• Follow the Sons of Patriarchy podcast about Doug Wilson on Spotify

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Talking to your kids about sex & puberty is awkward! And over the years the church has made some big mistakes. Today we talk about how to avoid the biggest ones--and some encouragement for how to do this with as little awkwardness as possible.

OUR SEX AND PUBERTY COURSE:

Check out our revamped version of The Whole Story--our sex and puberty course for parents to share with kids. It's video-based, and it makes covering all the info much easier. It's on sale until Monday, October 28 at midnight.

TO SUPPORT US:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED:

• Our book She Deserves Better

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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We aren’t going to fix the abuse crisis in the church until we deal with the underlying beliefs that actually enable abuse. Today Kristin Kobes Du Mez joins us to talk about her new documentary For Our Daughters, which shows how beliefs about gender, power and politics that are rampant in the church actually contribute to abuse. And Pastor Trey Ferguson joins us to comment on a recent article he wrote explaining how evangelicalism’s views of sex, which ignore intimacy, contribute to abuse too.

OUR SPONSOR:

Dr. Camden’s wonderful new book Recovering from Purity Culture launches this week! Learn the 5 myths of purity culture, how they affected you, and best of all—how to heal from them. Highly practical and insightful!

Plus Sheila wrote the foreword!

https://drcamden.com/book/

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED:

• Check out our Hazardous Materials stickers to go on your books!
• Kristin’s documentary For Our Daughters
• The website for the film
• Jesus and John Wayne
• Pastor Trey’s article on Reframing Sex
• Trey Ferguson’s Online Church
• Trey Ferguson’s book Theologizin’ Bigger
• Andy Savage’s bio on his new church’s website
• My video about Andy Savage not returning to ministry

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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We know purity culture hurt so many of us. But how do we actually move on and recover from purity culture? Today Dr. Camden Morgante joins us to look at the 5 myths of purity culture, and how to heal and get to the other side!

OUR FREE WEBINAR!

Join Rebecca and me as we host Camden for a FREE webinar looking more into these myths, where we find them, and where we go from here! It'll be a super fun hour with some prizes, games, and lots of inside scoop!

Monday, October 14, 8 pm EST. Sign up here

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

THINGS MENTIONED IN THE PODCAST:

• Dr. Camden's book Recovering from Purity Culture
• Get Dr. Camden's pre-order bonuses!
• Follow Dr. Camden online
• Find Dr. Camden on Instagram

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Ever heard the stat from “a recent study” that found that, when a husband comes to Christ first, in 93% of cases the wife and kids follow, but when the wife comes to Christ first, it’s only 17%? That stat is EVERYWHERE, quoted by the head of the SBC; heads of seminaries; heads of counseling organizations. The problem? No one ever cites the original source. So today Beth Allison Barr and Miranda Zapor Cruz, both academics looking into gender relations in church, join me to try to track down the source. And spoiler alert: People seem to have made this up about 30 years ago—and they keep quoting it! We look at why this matters, and what happens when churches assume this stat is true.

OUR SPONSOR

Ever, AJ: Uniquely crafted vegan leather Bible cases. These Bible Cases are GORGEOUS and FUNCTIONAL! Use it as a traditional case, or you can also buy purses and wristlets. Makes a great gift too!

THINGS MENTIONED:

• Miranda Zapor Cruz’ article for MissioAlliance: The Myth of the 93%
• Julie Roys’ podcast talking with Amanda Cunningham
• Tim Clinton Clip
• Danny Akin citing the “stat”
• Josh Howerton clip (around 20:15)
• J.D. Greear clip
• The Baptist Press article
• The Orthodox Barbie clip
• The Christ Church of the Valley handbook with the “stat”
• Matt Chandler saying he preaches to men: (around 36-37 minutes)

ABOUT MIRANDA ZAPOR CRUZ:

• Find Miranda Zapor Cruz on Facebook
• Order her book Faithful Politics

ABOUT BETH ALLISON BARR:

• Find Beth Allison Barr on Threads
• Pre-order Becoming the Pastor’s Wife
• Our podcast on The Making of Biblical Womanhood

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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We're all about healthy advice for marriage and sex. But what if evangelical teachings around parenting have also been messed up? And how can we parent in a healthy way? David and Amanda Erickson join us to talk about their new book The Flourishing Family, based on Scripture, brain science, attachment theory, and more. THIS is how we should parent!

OUR SPONSOR

Ever, AJ: Uniquely crafted vegan leather Bible cases. These Bible Cases are GORGEOUS and FUNCTIONAL! Use it as a traditional case, or you can also buy purses and wristlets. Makes a great gift too!

THINGS MENTIONED IN THE PODCAST

• The Flourishing Family
• Follow David and Amanda on Instagram
• Follow them on Facebook
• The clip of the Baptist pastor talking about spanking
• Our post where we look at the research about spanking
• Pre-Order The Marriage You Want (our new book coming in March!)

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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The evangelical world has an orgasm gap of 47 points between husbands and wives. Only 48% of women orgasm almost always or always, and 33% orgasm never or rarely.

The good news is that if you're in that 33%--you can still get to the 48%!

Today Rebecca and I look back at all the other episodes we've talked about orgasms, and have a great time discussing how we can learn to help couples prioritize her pleasure!

THE ORGASM COURSE

It's on sale until Monday, September 23 at midnight! When you purchase the regular course, you'll get the men's version added for free!

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

Things Mentioned in the Podcast

• The Great Sex Rescue
• Episode 74: You're Not Broken if Orgasm Is Elusive
• Episode 92: All about Orgasms
• Episode 129: Where Emerson Eggerichs Ignores Marital Rape (and doesn't understand women's arousal)
• Episode 222: How Sex Is Like Chef Boyardee
• Episode 168: The Myth of the Magic Penis

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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We know it’s not all men who are predators. But it’s far too many. And a recent horrible court case in France is reminding women all over the world that far too many men are willing and eager to do the unthinkable. The only way to tell who is safe is to look at their words and their actions. And the words of far too many evangelical leaders and authors and pastors are straight up rape culture. After what happened to Gisele Pelicot, I’m not willing to put up with it anymore. No more Every Man’s Battle rape culture mindset in the church!

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS

Our Sponsor:

Rebecoming: Come Out of Hiding to Live as Your God-Given Essential Self.
This amazing book is one of the best I’ve read to explain basic counseling concepts, and gives you practical exercises to work through as you try to get unstuck. Highly recommend!

Things Mentioned

• The 7 Point Evangelical Confession of 2024
• Josh Howerton’s sermon clip
• A synopsis of the horrible ordeal of Gisele Pelicot
• The Great Sex Rescue
• The Great Sex Rescue Toolkit
• The Every Man’s Battle one sheet download
• Coinswallow's post on Instagram

Check out Sheila's books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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It’s a complete therapy session—in one book and one podcast! Dr. Merry Lin joins us to explain why we so often feel stuck—and how to move forward. If you’ve been confused by terms like trauma, attachment theory, the Stone Age brain, and more, Dr. Merry Lin joins us for a primer that can help us get unstuck—and rebecome who we were meant to be!

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

HELP US OUT AFTER THE HACKING!

• Please follow OUR NEW FACEBOOK PAGE
• If you see a Facebook page called Endlessly Stories with weird images—that is our old page. Please report it!

About Dr. Merry Lin:

• See her book Rebecoming
• Find Dr. Merry’s website
• Find Dr. Merry on Instagram

THINGS MENTIONED IN THE PODCAST:

• The Orgasm Course
• Self Awareness Test

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What does it look like to actually grow like Christ? Like, not from a sermon, or not from some lofty retreat, but just in the here and now? Can we actually grow “holier”? A beautiful conversation with Karen Stiller, author of the book Holiness Here. We tackle envy, joy, contentment—and even grief, as she shares about processing the death of her husband.

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

HELP US OUT AFTER THE HACKING!

• Please follow OUR NEW FACEBOOK PAGE
• If you see a Facebook page called Endlessly Stories with weird images—that is our old page. Please report it!

ABOUT KAREN

• Find Karen’s book Holiness Here
• Find the article Karen wrote about grief

THINGS MENTIONED IN THE PODCAST:

• The post I wrote for Karen about what churches need today
• Join the Bare Marriage cruise, February 2025!
• The Orgasm Course
• We're in the midst of revamping The Whole Story, our sex and puberty course! If you purchase it now you can still work through it, and then you'll have access to the new one when it's out in two months.
• See Keith and me speak at a marriage conference in Lead, South Dakota, September 27 & 28

Check out Sheila's books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Sheila and Rebecca are answering your questions today! We covered how to find a new church when you feel like church has let you down; how to start your sex life well; what to do when people don’t think purity culture was harmful; and so much more! And we throw data and nuance into the mix too.

HELP US OUT AFTER THE HACKING!

• Please follow OUR NEW FACEBOOK PAGE
• If you see a Facebook page called Endlessly Stories with weird images—that is our old page. Please report it!

OUR SPONSOR

It's the Bible that lets girls see themselves in the story! The Kingdom Girls Bible from Zonderkidz--with profiles of all the women in the Bible (including many you may not have heard of!). It's an awesome Bible for girls 8-12--or for you too!

TO SUPPORT US

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!
• Join our email list!

LINKS

• Download our rubric and scorecard for the problematic books
• Check out our Toolkit with handouts on all the toxic teachings, and more
• The Good Girl’s/Good Guy’s Guides to Great Sex (make them the engagement gifts!)
• The Great Sex Rescue
• My Instagram Channel where all the questions came from
• Last week’s podcast on authoritarian control
• Podcast from a Pelvic Floor Physiotherapist

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

And her FACEBOOK PAGE has been HACKED--so please join the new official one!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What if you discovered that marriage books like The Excellent Wife actually follows Steve Hassan's BITE model of cult indoctrination? And what if these marriage books were giving advice that mirrored coercive control?

Bare Marriage podcast, episode 246, featuring Bethany Jantzi. Bethany did her thesis on coercive control, and today she shows us how these books use methods like: diminishing/devaluing personhood; undermining autonomy; creating psychological dependency; using a fear-based system of control; suppressing critical thinking; and conditioning compliance. And all of those things factor into abuse rates and coercive control. And we can do better than this!

OUR SPONSOR:

It's the Bible that lets girls see themselves in the story! The Kingdom Girls Bible from Zonderkidz--with profiles of all the women in the Bible (including many you may not have heard of!). It's an awesome Bible for girls 8-12--or for you too!

TO SUPPORT US:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work

For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation

And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

FIND BETHANY:
Free From Control on Instagram
Bethany's website: Free From Control

THINGS MENTIONED:

How God Sees Women by Terran Williams
Marg Mowczko on Bible Interpretations
Our Series on the Danvers Statement

Timestamps

0.11 Intro

11.30 Complimentarianism

18.24 God Knows Best

31.50 Control and Domination

40.10 Wife as a Training Ground

59.30 Are We Under Undue Influence

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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The Excellent Wife by Martha Peace sells like hotcakes in biblical counseling/ fundamentalist/ homeschooling circles, and even though it seems like a “fringe” book, it’s affecting tens of thousands of women. Today Marissa Burt and Tia Levings and I sit down to talk about the problems with this book that tells women they must obey their husbands and submit—no matter what.

Our Sponsor:

It's the Bible that lets girls see themselves in the story! The Kingdom Girls Bible from Zonderkidz--with profiles of all the women in the Bible (including many you may not have heard of!). It's an awesome Bible for girls 8-12--or for you too!
To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

• Download our Onesheet on The Excellent Wife
• Our podcast on how Emerson Eggerichs misuses Scripture in Love & Respect
• Marissa’s post on 10 reasons parents have a hard time giving up spanking
• 4 Concerns with Biblical Counseling

About Tia Levings:

• Tia’s book, The Well-Trained Wife
• Find Tia on Instagram and Substack (as The Anti-Fundamentalist)
• Listen to last week’s podcast with Tia

About Marissa Burt:

• Find Marissa on Instagram and X
• Read Marissa’s Substack

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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She went to a flagship SBC church. She wasn’t supposed to get sucked into fundamentalism. But Tia ended up being stuck in an abusive marriage, trying to fix things by following advice from Gothard and more. It made her sick. It made her hopeless. But finally she realized, no one else is going to rescue us. I have to do this for me and the kids. And she did. Her story is riveting, touching, and relevant. Listen to a Well-Trained Wife!

Our Sponsor:

It's the Bible that lets girls see themselves in the story! The Kingdom Girls Bible from Zonderkidz--with profiles of all the women in the Bible (including many you may not have heard of!). It's an awesome Bible for girls 8-12--or for you too!
To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

About Tia Levings:

• Tia’s book, The Well-Trained Wife
• Find Tia on Instagram and Substack (as The Anti-Fundamentalist)

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

• Tia's reel on Fundie Baby Voice
• The Dallas area pastors who have had to resign

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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The evangelical church spends a lot of time giving modesty messages to girls. But we hardly ever talk about vanity--even though the Bible condemns it. Could it be that in all our talk about modesty, we're inadvertently promoting vanity? And perhaps we can't call out vanity, because our messages to boys essentially enable vanity. Join Rebecca and Sheila as we hash this one out!

With thanks to our sponsor:If church was your place of deepest hurt, can you find peace and healing with Christ? Check out Ryan George's bookHurt and Healed by the Church

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

• Our book She Deserves Better
• The Instagram channel HerCherch with all the cartoons
• Our Orgasm Course and Libido Course
• Our podcast looking at the long-term effects of the modesty message
• Why is Dannah Gresh calling 8-year-old bellies intoxicating?
• Our one-sheet on Lies Young Women Believe
• The reel from Our Savior's Church
• The side-by-side plagiarized apology from Josh Howerton

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Ever heard people say, "The Bible is crystal clear" or "if you don't believe that, you don't believe the Bible?" Quite often people equate their interpretation of the Bible with the Bible itself--with bad results. Today Scott Coley joins us to talk about his new book Ministers of Propaganda, and to look at how many evangelical leaders have used logical fallacies to keep themselves at the top of the power hierarchy. Plus let's look at how to get back to the way of Jesus!

With thanks to our sponsor:If church was your place of deepest hurt, can you find peace and healing with Christ? Check out Ryan George's bookHurt and Healed by the Church

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

• Find Scott Coley's book Ministers of Propaganda
• Find Scott on X
• Check out The Great Sex Rescue Toolkit

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What if the church hurt you terribly? Can you still heal? Today Ryan George joins us to talk about how his fundamentalist family covers up his father’s sexual abuse of others—and how Ryan eventually learned the truth and turned his father in. And then Ryan deconstructed so much of what he had been taught—and found the real Jesus. Join us as Ryan George talks about his book Hurt and Healed by the Church.

About Ryan's Book

• Ryan’s book Hurt and Healed by the Church
• Find all of Ryan's books

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What happens when your family gets sucked into fundamentalism, and your father insists on controlling your life, including who you will marry? You grow up under Christian patriarchy, and you experience serious emotional abuse. Today Cait West joins us to talk about her absolutely beautiful memoir Rift, about how and why she had to break free. Then Keith and I talk about why people are deconstructing, and why it’s so desperately important to listen to stories like Cait’s.

About Cait West:

Find Cait’s book Rift

Find Cait on Twitter and Threads

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

Our post on 8 things to know about deconstruction

Our book The Great Sex Rescue

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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People who deconstruct are often accused of never believing in the first place, or of just wanting to sin. But those who deconstruct are often those who have been hurt the most by toxic teachings. Today Sarah McCammon joins us to talk about who are “ex-vangelicals”, and her own story of deconstruction. And then Keith and I talk about what it means to create a safe and just community that honors people’s fears, betrayals, and concerns.

About Sarah McCammon:

• Find Sarah's book The Exvangelicals on Amazon
• Follow Sarah on Substack

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things Mentioned in this Podcast:

• Our book She Deserves Better
• The Great Sex Rescue Toolkit to help people understand why certain teachings hurt people
• Marg Mowczko's site analyzing the biblical passages pertaining to women
• The saga of Robert Morris’ abuse, from Dee at Wartburg Watch who broke the story
• Larry Linn’s Twitter thread about righteousness

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Why is a frequenty-used book in teen girls' Bible studies focusing on Satan and not Jesus?

A deep dive into the book Lies Young Women Believe by Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth and Dannah Gresh. Let's see what is being taught to teen girls--and why it's so problematic. We can do better, church!

Get our Downloadable One Sheet of the problems with the book Lies Young Women Believe:

Thanks to our sponsor, the book The Sex Talk You Never Got by Sam Jolman

And listen to our interview with Sam about the book!

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things Mentioned in this Podcast:

• Our podcasts about the book Lies Women Believe: Part 1 and its treatment of abuse and Part 2 and its portrayal of God
• Our downloadable onesheet about Lies Women Believe
• Our book She Deserves Better
• Our podcast going over the problems with how Dannah Gresh teaches about modesty
• Why do women support modesty messages?
• Dannah Gresh's submission quiz

About Johnna Harris

• Follow her on Instagram and X, and find her podcast Bodies Behind the Bus

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Every Father’s Day, there’s a rallying cry in many conservative evangelical spaces that men are losing out and fathers are under attack. Where’s the truth in this? And what are the problems with talking about marriage like this? Plus we rewrite Harrison Butker’s commencement speech!

Thanks to our sponsor, the book The Sex Talk You Never Got by Sam Jolman

And listen to our interview with Sam about the book!

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things Mentioned in this Podcast:

• Focus on the Family Broadcast, Finding the Hero in Your Husband (Part 1)
• Harrison Butker Speech and Transcript
• Our Bare Marriage podcast on the idea that women talk too much (put forward by Focus on the Family under James Dobson)
• My post from last Father’s Day about framing your husband as the hero

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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What if purity culture didn’t just steal sexual health from women, but stole it from men too? What does it mean for a man to have healthy sexuality? Today licensed counselor Sam Jolman joins us for The Sex Talk You Never Got.

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

• The Sex Talk You Never Got by Sam Jolman:
• Find Sam on Instagram
• Sam's website, where you can sign up for his Substack
• The Boost Your Libido Course

All about New River Fellowship Church:

• New River Fellowship
• Facebook
• Instagram

Pastor Joey Willis, Lead Pastor at New River Fellowship in Hudson Oaks, Texas.

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Evangelical conservatives too often portray masculinity as if men are supposed to be the “Alpha male”—aloof, emotionless, vying for control, and bullying. Today we look at how, even in nature, this concept of the Alpha Male has been overblown. And we present a better picture.

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things mentioned in the podcast:

• Let Men Be Men podcasts, and Let Men Be Dads
• Josh Howerton about Evangelical Honeymoons
• The Desiring God article where Greg Morse bemoans all the safe men
• The TED Talk from Frans de Waal about Alpha Males
• Rick Pidcock analyses the Stronger Men’s Conference with Mark Driscoll’s “Jezebel” outburst
• This week’s article on turning the other cheek

All about New River Fellowship Church

• New River Fellowship
• Facebook
• Instagram

Pastor Joey Willis, Lead Pastor at New River Fellowship in Hudson Oaks, Texas.

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Today we have some special guests on, the lovely ladies from Pastors’ Wives Tell All! This is not the first time I’ve been on a podcast with them, but usually it’s theirs. So this time they are joining me on my show to discuss the topic of their upcoming book, Pastor’s Wives Tell All: Navigating real church life with honesty and humour. And surprise surprise, the topic is right in the title. Or the subtitle to be exact. So that’s what we are talking about today, and with people who deal with the ins and outs of church life on a daily basis.

THINGS MENTIONED IN THE PODCAST

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Pastors’ Wives Tell All:

• Preorder their new book Pastors’ Wives Tell All: Navigating Real Church Life With Honesty and Humour
• Find their Podcast on their site

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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With the release of so many books critiquing purity culture, what has the backlash been like? Well, let’s talk about it with Zachary Wagner, the author of Non-Toxic Masculinity as we celebrate the one-year anniversary of the launch of She Deserves Better.

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

About Zachary Wagner:

• Find Zachary's book Non-Toxic Masculinity
• Find Zachary on Instagram

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

• Our book She Deserves Better!
• Zachary's response to the review from Shane Morris on The Gospel Coalition
• Bob and Dannah Gresh's appearance at Cedarville University
• Information about Dannah calling 8-year-old's bellies intoxicating
• Fred Stoeker's appearance on Focus on the Family
• Matthew West's podcast discussing Modest is Hottest

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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We've got such a compelling interview with Lauren Rose from Called to Peace Ministries. She's telling her story--and it's a mesmerizing one--of what happened as her family got more and more into the Bill Gothard movement (and she was eventually one of the ones he allegedly abused, and was part of the lawsuit).

But when you grow up feeling like your main role is to submit, are you even able to recognize abuse?

Lauren tells her story of being in an abusive marriage, and how she eventually realized something was wrong and came out of it.

(Also: at the beginning I quoted a Bible passage and said Matthew 18. I meant Matthew 15. Sorry!)

Our Sponsor:The Kingdom Girls NIV Bible. Meet the women in God's story! Designed for girls, but honestly--it's awesome for every woman! And it makes a great Easter gift. The Bible includes beautiful photos and write-ups on every woman who is mentioned in Scripture. Finally, a Bible that highlights God's story for women. View a sample of the Bible here!

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

About Lauren Rose and Called to Peace:

• Called to Peace Ministries
• Find Called to Peace on Facebook, including my interview on how Sexual Coercion is Domestic Abuse

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

• Our podcast with another Gothard Survivor, Emily Elizabeth
• Our interview with Alyssa Wakefield, who grew up in a Gothard home and was groomed for abuse (Part 1, and Part 2).
• Our podcast episode 229 with Jay Stringer about Josh Howerton's wedding night advice
• My Twitter thread about Josh Howerton's "apology"
• The original thread that went viral, as well as a

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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When we talk about how God made sex to be mutual, intimate, and pleasurable for both, and how, if women don't want sex, the answer is to figure out why, we invariably get people saying, "so you think women don't have to have sex then?"

Today on the podcast we look at the 90% problem vs. the 10% problem. In 90% of cases where women don't want sex, there's a reason. Let's focus mostly on the 90%! But guess what? We actually talk about the 10% too!

Our Sponsor:The book Forgiveness After Trauma. A victim-centered approach to what forgiveness looks like after betrayal. Rather than pressuring a victim to forgive, let's examine what Scripture says about lament, anger, accountability, and what reconciliation looks like. I was so, so blown away by this book, and saw things in Scripture I never saw before. Check out Susannah Griffith's story, and this amazing book.

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

The Products We Mentioned:

• Our book The Great Sex Rescue
• The Orgasm Course
• The Boost Your Libido Course

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

• Our podcast on obligation sex, and the post that goes along with it
• The podcast where we discuss Emerson Eggerichs saying you can't tell if a woman is aroused--and a follow-up podcast going into more detail on how evangelical writers portray female orgasm
• More podcasts on libido: 3 ways to talk about libido differences, and have we made sex into a yes space for men?

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Recently Texas SBC megachurch pastor Josh Howerton told brides that on the wedding night, they should "stand where he wants you to stand, wear what he wants you to wear, and do what he wants you to do." Sex was presented as something that HE has been waiting for his whole life, and that she has to provide. There was no emphasis on how she actually has greater need to be cared for sexually, if you're going to begin well, than he does. Jay Stringer joins us today to talk about how the conversation around sex often leads to couples starting off badly--and also allows men to not have to grow up or do the work of being mature, emotionally healthy people.

Our Sponsor:The book Forgiveness After Trauma. A victim-centered approach to what forgiveness looks like after betrayal. Rather than pressuring a victim to forgive, let's examine what Scripture says about lament, anger, accountability, and what reconciliation looks like. I was so, so blown away by this book, and saw things in Scripture I never saw before. Check out Susannah Griffith's story, and this amazing book.

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

About Jay Stringer:

• Check out Jay's book Unwanted
• Find Jay on Instagram
• Learn more about the upcoming Sexual Attachment Conference

Links We Mentioned:

• Jay's first podcast with us on his book Unwanted
• Our book The Great Sex Rescue, with the stats on vaginismus and sexual pain
• Our books for engaged couples, The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex
• Our podcast looking at Josh and Jana's Howerton's sex talk
• The podcast showing how Josh Howerton plagiarizes in his sermons
• The Orgasm Course
• The Marriage Night at Lakepointe Church Howerton was referring to
• The study on the effects of orgasm the first time you have sex

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Forgiveness is so often weaponized against victims in the church. But what does the Bible really say about forgiveness, especially when trauma is involved? How can we value our own mental health but also follow Jesus? This is a fascinating and healing conversation with Susannah Griffith, author of Forgiveness After Trauma.

Our Sponsor:The Kingdom Girls NIV Bible. Meet the women in God's story! Designed for girls, but honestly--it's awesome for every woman! And it makes a great Easter gift. The Bible includes beautiful photos and write-ups on every woman who is mentioned in Scripture. Finally, a Bible that highlights God's story for women. View a sample of the Bible here!

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Links We Mentioned:

• Susannah Griffith’s book Forgiveness After Trauma
• Find Susannah at her website

Future Speaking Events:
Belleville, ON: St. Thomas Anglican Church in Belleville, Ontario is throwing a party for us to celebrate The Great Sex Rescue and She Deserves Better! March 23, 2:30-4:30 pm. Q&A, crafts with toxic books, and more.
More information here.

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Natalie Hoffman joins us today to talk about her INCREDIBLE memoir All the Scary Little Gods. Natalie escaped an abusive marriage, and now coaches other women in similar situations. In her memoir, she invites us to listen to the story from the point of view of Little Natalie, and using IFS (Internal Family Systems) to see it from all of her parts. And as we understand our stories, we make it so that we won't recreate the problems.

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Links We Mentioned:

• Natalie Hoffman’s book All the Scary Little Gods
• Natalie’s website Flying Free, and her Flying Free podcast
• The first podcast Natalie did with me–how Christian books made me stay in an abusive marriage
• Natalie joined us on our podcast about the book Lies Women Believe
• Richard Schwartz' book No Bad Parts
• Jenna Riemersma's book on IFS Altogether You

Future Speaking Events:
Belleville, ON: St. Thomas Anglican Church in Belleville, Ontario is throwing a party for us to celebrate The Great Sex Rescue and She Deserves Better! March 23, 2:30-4:30 pm. Q&A, crafts with toxic books, and more.
More information here.

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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So many people resist admitting that they are actually egalitarians, because they think they have to be complementarian--even if they don't act like it. Today Sheila and her husband Keith dissect the arguments that are often used to say "we're really complementarian"--even when they're objectively not. And we invite people instead to preach what they practice.

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• For tax deductible donations in the U.S., support Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch, or any of our courses!

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

• The Council for Biblical Manhood and Womanhood's statement
• Our podcast with Nancy Pearcey where we explain how complementarians act as egalitarians
• The interview with Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth and Robert Wolgemuth
• The Great Sex Rescue, with our findings about decision-making
• Rebecca Groothuis' article about equality
• Jonathan Leeman's article (and video) about a husband's authority

Resources about the Biblical Argument for Equality:

• Marg Mowczko's site--amazing short articles on virtually every bible passage about gender.
• Our podcast with Philip Payne, and his book The Bible vs. Biblical Womanhood
• Terran Williams' book How God Sees Women
• Terran Williams' series refuting Mike Winger's videos
• Julie Zine Coleman's book On Purpose

Future Speaking Events:
Grand Rapids, MI: Sheila and Rebecca will be at Calvin University on March 13 and 14 . March 13 at 4:30; March 13 at 7 pm for a panel discussion; and March 14 at 7 pm. More details here.

Belleville, ON: St. Thomas Anglican Church in Belleville, Ontario is throwing a party for us to celebrate The Great Sex Rescue and She Deserves Better! March 23, 2:30-4:30 pm. Q&A, crafts with toxic books, and more.

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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The Great Sex Rescue turns 3 this week! And it's been a super eventful three years. So much has changed. So let's talk about the feedback we've had, what we've done since, what people are saying--and where we're going from here.

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• Or, for tax deductible donations in the U.S., support our Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch at our store, or any of our courses!

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

• The Great Sex Rescue! Learn more, or get it right from Amazon.
• Our Healthy Sexuality Rubric where we scored the books we looked at for The Great Sex Rescue.
• The Great Sex Rescue Toolkit to tell others about our findings
• Our podcast where we discussed how the authors we critiqued had responded to The Great Sex Rescue.
• The article on Julie Roys' site about Focus on the Family deleting comments on the Reel where Juli Slattery used our talking points.
• Juli Slattery's reel on Focus on the Family's Instagram page
• The Bodies Behind the Bus podcast where Joy tells her story about The Great Sex Rescue (we're near the end) (and here's part 2!)

Future Speaking Events:
Grand Rapids, MI: Sheila and Rebecca will be at Calvin University on March 13 and 14 . March 13 at 4:30; March 13 at 7 pm for a panel discussion; and March 14 at 7 pm. More details here.

Belleville, ON: St. Thomas Anglican Church in Belleville, Ontario is throwing a party for us to celebrate The Great Sex Rescue and She Deserves Better! We'll have blackout poetry crafts and other paper crafts to do with toxic books (bring them along!), a silent auction, a Q&A, and more. March 23, 2:30 - 5:00 pm. All welcome.

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Would our reaction to Christian marriage advice change if we realize how many people who write that advice are actually in abusive or destructive marriages? What if people in those marriages are more drawn to write marriage advice to process how they're feeling?

Today we look at two different women that Focus on the Family have held up to be emulated. One is a woman who has written prolifically for them, and when you look at her articles and what she reveals about her relationship, a TON of red flags are present. The other is a woman whose husband was jailed for domestic violence, but then she prayed, he repented, and now they lead Love & Respect seminars together. And Focus on the Family thinks this is a positive message.

Today Sheila Gregoire is joined by her husband Keith and by abuse educator Sarah McDugal.

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• Or, for tax deductible donations in the U.S., support our Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch at our store!

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

• The article in the Revealer about Elisabeth Elliot's marriage
• My article detailing Focus on the Family's Facebook post praising the man who was jailed for domestic violence, as well as the letter I sent to Jim Daly
• My article on TradWife influencers and my concern for them
• Our podcast on Power of a Praying Wife
• Our one sheet download on Love & Respect
• Focus on the Family's article "It's the Little Things"
• Our Open Letter to Focus on the Family

Find Sarah McDugal:

• Follow Sarah on Facebook
• Find her at Wilderness to Wild

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Lies Women Believe by Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth taught concerning things about shame, trauma, and even what God is like. On today's podcast, we're joined by Becky Castle Miller, a doctoral student looking at emotions in the Bible, and Helen Blake, a licensed counselor in Sydney, Australia, to discuss some of the damaging teachings--and point us to a Jesus who understands and sympathizes with our struggles.

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

To Support Us:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
• Or, for tax deductible donations in the U.S., support our Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation
• And check out our Merch at our store!

Our Downloadable Onesheet:
Download our One Sheet on Lies Women Believe, looking at the problems with the book

Other Things We Talked About:

• Last week's podcast on Part 1 of Lies Women Believe
• Find Becky Castle Miller on Instagram
• Scot McKnight's book King Jesus Gospel

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Lies Women Believe by Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth is one of the most popular women’s bible study books used in churches across North America. But what does the book actually teach about marriage? About sex? About divorce and abuse? It’s scary, and today Gretchen Baskerville and Natalie Hoffman join host Sheila Wray Gregoire to analyze the harmful messages in Lies Women Believe.

Things Mentioned in the Podcast:

To Support Us:
Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work
Or, for tax deductible donations in the U.S., support our Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation

Our Downloadable Onesheet:
Download our One Sheet on Lies Women Believe:

Natalie Hoffman's Information:
Natalie’s Podcast Flying Free, and her website
Natalie Hoffman’s book Is It Me: Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage

Gretchen Baskerville's Information:
Gretchen Baskerville’s site The Lifesaving Divorce:
Gretchen Baskerville’s YouTube channel:
Gretchen’s book The Lifesaving Divorce

Other Resources
Our podcast on The Power of a Praying Wife (featuring Gretchen):
Our podcast telling Natalie’s story:
Our book She Deserves Better, which deals with Nancy Leigh DeMoss’ book Lies Young Women Believe:

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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**Links to things mentioned:

First, support us!**
Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work

Or, for tax deductible donations in the U.S., support our Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation

Check out our Merch!

Our Resources
Sign up for Rebecca’s Friday emails

The Orgasm Course (there’s also an add-on for husbands)

She Deserves Better book

The Studies We Looked At:
Time Use and Feelings of Love

“Women Get Worse Sex: A Confound in the Explanation of Gender Differences in Sexuality

“Popular Psychology Through a Scientific Lens: Evaluating Love Languages From a Relationship Science Perspective”

“Gender Inequities in Household Labor Predict Lower Desire”,

How to Understand Statistics Podcast (and how statistics can be misused):

Want to be part of our research team?If you're a grad student, prof, or other academic, check out our job opportunities to help with peer reviewed research papers:

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work https://patreon.com/baremarriage

Or, for tax deductible donations in the U.S., support our Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation: https://secure.qgiv.com/for/goodfruits

Check out our Merch–including our Love & Respect His & Her mugs: https://sheilawraygregoire.com/shop/his-hers-love-and-respect-ceramic-mugs/

Sign up for Rebecca’s Friday emails: http://eepurl.com/z0VFn

The Great Sex Rescue: https://baremarriage.com/great-sex-rescue/

The Good Guy’s Guide to Great Sex: https://baremarriage.com/good-girls-guys-guide-great-sex/

Gary’s article “Young Husband: It Might Not be Her; It Might be Her Situation” https://garythomas.com/2017/06/29/young-husband-might-not-might-situation/

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:
Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month to support our work https://patreon.com/baremarriage

Or, for tax deductible donations in the U.S., support our Good Fruit Faith Initiative through the Bosko Foundation: https://secure.qgiv.com/for/goodfruits

Check out our Merch–including our Love & Respect His & Her mugs: https://sheilawraygregoire.com/shop/his-hers-love-and-respect-ceramic-mugs/

Emerson Eggerichs’ reel where he talks about relationships https://www.instagram.com/reel/CxL4Lm6pDo7/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

Our summary of the issues with Love & Respect https://baremarriage.com/2023/01/summary-problems-love-and-respect-emerson-eggerichs/

Our Open Letter to Focus on the Family about Love & Respect https://baremarriage.com/2020/01/open-letter-focus-on-the-family-love-respect-emerson-eggerichs/

(All of our other posts are linked there)

Our podcast looking at the way he downplayed abuse in a sermon series at Houston First Baptist Church https://baremarriage.com/2021/03/podcast-on-emerson-eggerichs-gaslighting-emotional-abuse-victims-and-stop-seeing-women-as-dangerous/

Our look at how Emerson Eggerichs misuses Scripture in Love & Respect

https://baremarriage.com/2023/01/emerson-eggerichs-twists-scripture-love-respect/

The problems with hierarchy in marriage (Keith’s Danvers statement series) https://baremarriage.com/2023/06/danvers-statement-series-complementarian-problem-1-men-dominating-their-wives/

Check out Andrew Bauman’s Christian Counseling Center for Sexual Health and Trauma: https://christiancc.org/

Andrew J. Bauman’s website https://andrewjbauman.com, or follow him on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/AndrewJamesBauman

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:

• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month, and get access to our Facbook group, unfiltered podcasts, and more!
• Thanks to everyone who helped us reach our fundraising goal! You can give to our work and get tax deductible donations (within the United States) by donating to the Good Fruit Faith initiative of the Bosko Foundation.
• Check out our Merch at our store, including our biblical womanhood and biblical manhood merch, our new Jezebel merch, and more!
• Join our email list so you don't miss one of Rebecca's great Friday emails, or any chances to be in new surveys, etc.
• Mark Gungor's clip about preferring a dog to a wife who talks to you
• The Halo 3 study about female voiced players

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:

Partner with us at Good Fruit Faith, an initiative of the Bosko Foundation, as we help impact future church leaders with our data and our message (tax receiptable within the U.S.): https://secure.qgiv.com/for/goodfruits

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month and get access to unfiltered podcasts! https://patreon.com/baremarriage

Find Scot McKnight and Laura Barringer’s book Pivot: https://amzn.to/3ToOKiV, along with their first book together A Church Called Tov: https://amzn.to/41nRsrd

Our first podcast together about their book A Church Called Tov: https://baremarriage.com/2021/04/podcast-a-church-called-tov-and-matthew-18/

Find Scot McKnight’s New Testament bible study series: https://amzn.to/46Zc5uW

Laura Barringer on Threads: https://www.threads.net/@lauraebarringer

Scot McKnight on Threads: https://www.threads.net/@scotandkris

Me on Threads! https://www.threads.net/@sheilagregoire

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:

Our marriage survey is still open! We’re looking for married couples to take it. https://baremarriage.com/grim

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month, and get access to our incredible Facebook group, unfiltered podcasts, and more! https://patreon.com/baremarriage

Help us raise $52,000 by Christmas to expand our reach and make inroads into academic circles! BOSKO LINK HERE

Laura Anderson’s book When Religion Hurts You https://amzn.to/3sB0Zhs

Find Laura on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drlauraeanderson/

Our Merch: order before December 10 to use it as Christmas gifts! https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product-category/merchandise/

Our book She Deserves Better, outlining some of the trauma messages teen girls receive, and our book The Great Sex Rescue, outlining vaginismus as a potential trauma response

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Things mentioned in this podcast:

Our survey link! Couples are invited to take our marriage survey (you take it individually and it’s confidential): https://baremarriage.com/grim

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month and help support our research and our work! https://patreon.com/baremarriage

Join our email list and get Rebecca’s awesome Friday emails as well as a roundup of our best posts and podcasts: http://eepurl.com/z0VFn

Sarah’s Wilderness to Wild program: https://wildernesstowild.com

No Eden Elsewhere blog talking about small group abuse at Watermark Church: https://noedenelsewhere.com/the-aftermath-stories-from-former-watermark-church-members/

Dee Parsons from The Wartburg Watch on why you shouldn’t sign a membership covenant: https://thewartburgwatch.com/2023/09/11/smart-christians-need-to-think-carefully-before-joining-a-church-with-a-membership-covenant-which-is-a-legal-contract/ and how to resign from a membership covenant: https://thewartburgwatch.com/permpage-how-to-resign-from-a-church-whether-or-not-you-are-under-church-discipline/

Our podcast with Naghmeh Panahi: https://baremarriage.com/2023/10/naghmeh-panahi-bullied-leaving-abusive-marriage-podcast/

Biblical Counseling post on 98 ways you can sign against your husband: https://baremarriage.com/2019/06/sinning-against-husband/

The consent form you sign for biblical counseling: https://baremarriage.com/2019/03/question-your-biblical-counsellor/

John MacArthur Sermon Clip: https://www.gty.org/library/sermons-library/70-54/bible-questions-and-answers-part-77

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:
Take our marriage survey! We’re looking for couples to fill out our marriage survey: https://baremarriage.com/grim

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month and support our work, while getting access to our awesome Facebook community! https://patreon.com/baremarriage

Our Merch makes great Christmas gifts! Order before December 11 to guarantee delivery by Christmas: https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product-category/merchandise/

Andrew Whitehead’s book American Idolatry: https://amzn.to/3SubmhI, and Andrew Whitehead’s book with Sam Perry, Taking Back America for God https://amzn.to/3FU84Ne

Join Andrew’s substack! https://andrewwhitehead.substack.com/

Follow Andrew on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/ndrewwhitehead/

Listen to Andrew’s 4 part series on Christian nationalism: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/american-idols/id1706355168

Our book (co-authored with Joanan Sawatsky) The Great Sex Rescue https://baremarriage.com/great-sex-rescue/

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:

Our survey link! Couples are invited to take our marriage survey (you take it individually and it’s confidential):https://baremarriage.com/grim/

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month and help support our research and our work! https://patreon.com/baremarriage

The article where you can find the Elisabeth Elliot quote on the essence of femininity: https://www.crossway.org/articles/the-essence-of-femininity/

Holly Furtick’s reel on being grumpy: https://www.instagram.com/reel/CtnHKVJOOOI/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

Holly Furtick’s reel on not fussing and just praying:

https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cm1oSdNBGB3/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

The study on why sweating the small stuff is important:

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/18361676/ Get help for religious OCD at NOCD.com -- Licensed therapists using evidence-based techniques.https://nocd.com

John Gottman’s book The 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work:

https://amzn.to/3Mxzc8h

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month and help support our research and our work! https://patreon.com/baremarriage

Lisa Weaver Swartz’ book Stained Glass Ceilings: https://amzn.to/3suzUfJ

A write-up of the amicus brief submitted on behalf of the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary to deny victims the right to sue the organizations that failed to report and failed to protect: https://www.courier-journal.com/story/news/2023/10/27/southern-baptists-response-to-sex-abuse-in-kentucky/71343874007/

Our book She Deserves Better: https://baremarriage.com/she-deserves-better/

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:

Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month and support our work and research, while getting access to our Facebook group, unfiltered podcast, merch discounts, and more! https://patreon.com/baremarriage

Sign up for our email list to hear about when our next study is out! http://eepurl.com/z0VFn

The study that people say claim 75% of women divorce for lack of commitment (it doesn't really say that): https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4012696/

The study on how men are six times more likely to leave when one spouse is diagnosed with a life-altering disease: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/19645027/

She Divorced Me Because I Left Dishes in the Sink: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/she-divorced-me-i-left-dishes-by-the-sink_b_9055288 Plus Matthew Fray's book This Is How Your Marriage Ends: https://amzn.to/45PSM6w

Caylee Cresta's Instagram channel about mental load and taking out the trash: https://www.instagram.com/reel/CrQx8-sMKL9/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

Check out our Boost Your Libido Course https://baremarriage.com/boost-libido-course/ and our Orgasm course: https://baremarriage.com/the-orgasm-course/

Check out our books The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex and The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex: https://baremarriage.com/good-girls-guys-guide-great-sex/

Check out The Great Sex Rescue https://baremarriage.com/great-sex-rescue/

The study that found that women do more housework the more they out-earn their husbands: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3028208/

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:

• Join our Patreon and get access to the best place on the internet! https://patreon.com/baremarriage
• Check out our Domestic Violence Awareness Merch and our Breast Cancer Awareness Merch--20% of profits go to support charities involved in fighting DV and breast cancer: https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product-category/limited-edition/
• See Naghmeh's book I Didn't Survive: https://amzn.to/3MgUpmP
• Listen to the audio of Franklin Graham confronting Naghmeh--and Naghmeh standing her ground on Scripture: (at the bottom of this post): https://julieroys.com/panahi-graham-bullied-salvage-savesaeed/
• Read a synopsis of Naghmeh's story on the Roys Report: https://julieroys.com/panahi-graham-bullied-salvage-savesaeed/ or the Washington Post: https://www.washingtonpost.com/religion/2022/06/20/franklin-graham-domestic-abuse-abedini/

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month, and get access to our amazing Facebook group and unfiltered Sheila & Rebecca!
https://patreon.com/baremarriage
Christa Hardin's new book The Enneagram in Marriage:
https://amzn.to/3SmZyxR
Christa's podcast The Enneagram and Marriage:
https://www.enneagraminyourmarriage.com/pod
Christa on Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/enneagramandmarriage/
The study we analyzed:
https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/jomf.12863
Our new Biblical Manhood Merch:
https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product-category/biblical-manhood/

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:
Join our Patreon group for as little as $5 a month and be part of the most amazing place on the internet: https://patreon.com/baremarriage
Join our email list so that you'll be notified when I'm in your area--and so you don't miss any of Rebecca's amazing round-ups: http://eepurl.com/z0VFn
Kristin Kobes Du Mez' Twitter thread: https://twitter.com/kkdumez/status/1709746160120795295
Josh Howerton's sermon where the clip came from: https://subspla.sh/c7tmk53 (starting around timestamp 12:30)
Last week's podcast with Terran Williams on changing his mind and the impact on his family: https://baremarriage.com/2023/10/terran-williams-sets-out-to-prove-complementarianism/
Tim Little's bio at Faith Baptist Theological Seminary: https://faith.edu/faculty/dr-tim-little/
Gary Thomas' article where he misunderstands modern neuroscience: https://garythomasbooks.substack.com/p/every-mans-battle-yes-and-every-womans
Our podcast where Rebecca and Connor go over the meta-analysis on the differences between male and female brains: https://baremarriage.com/2021/09/pink-brains-blue-brains-gender-differences-neuroscience-podcast/ And the 2019 meta-analysis that we quoted from: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6681749/ and the 2021 meta-analysis: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0149763421000804
Rachel Joy Welcher's review of Shannon Harris' memoir in Christianity Today: https://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2023/september-web-only/shannon-harris-woman-they-wanted-memoir-purity-culture.html
Check out our new Biblical Manhood Merch! https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product-category/biblical-manhood/

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:

Join our Patreon and support our work for as little as $5 a month! https://patreon.com/baremarriage

Check out our new Biblical Manhood Merch! https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product-category/biblical-manhood/

Terran Williams’ Book How God Sees Women: https://amzn.to/3PJjwQ2

Terran’s book What’s So Amazing About Scripture: https://amzn.to/3ROMSiZ

Terran’s series on Mike Winger’s videos on complementarianism/egalitarianism: https://terranwilliams.com/what-winger-presently-gets-wrong-egalitarian-silver-bullet-galatians-328/ (all of his articles are linked at the bottom of this one)

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:

Join our Patreon! Support us for as little as $5 a month and get access to unfiltered podcasts, merch, and more! https://patreon.com/baremarriage

Check out our Biblical Womanhood merch, and our new Biblical Manhood merch!

https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product-category/biblical-womanhood-collection-merchandise/

https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product-category/be-a-biblical-woman-collection/

https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product-category/biblical-manhood/

Our Great Sex Rescue Toolkit–to help talk to your pastor, small group leader, women’s ministry leader, or anybody about the issues with the obligation sex message (it’s Pay-What-You-Can):

https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product/great-sex-rescue-toolkit/

Our Obligation Sex Series that has run all month:

https://baremarriage.com/2023/09/10-things-obligation-sex/

Our 4-Step Plan to Rebuild after Obligation Sex:

https://baremarriage.com/2022/11/the-sex-recovery-series-4-point-plan-to-rebuild-your-sex-life/

10 Questions to Ask if Your Wife Doesn’t Want Sex:

https://baremarriage.com/2020/09/10-questions-for-husbands-to-ask-if-your-wife-doesnt-want-sex/

The Good Guy’s Guide to Great Sex–to help men especially get a more biblical, intimate view of what sex is supposed to be:

https://baremarriage.com/good-girls-guys-guide-great-sex/

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:

Join our Patreon and support our research, plus hear me working through future posts and wondering what I should do next! https://patreon.com/baremarriage

Our summary of all the issues in this podcast, plus a downloadable one sheet! https://baremarriage.com/2023/09/review-of-the-problems-with-for-women-only-by-shaunti-feldhahn-with-download/

Our post that does a deep dive in the problematic survey questions that Shaunti Feldhahn asks:

https://baremarriage.com/2021/01/fixed-it-for-you-we-fix-a-survey-question-so-it-doesnt-enable-date-rape/

Find Meghan Tschanz’s podcast series on For Women Only: Part 1; Part 2; Part 3; Part 4

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bonus-episode-for-women-only-part-1/id1438368947?i=1000625676862

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/for-women-only-part-2/id1438368947?i=1000626549865

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/for-women-only-part-3/id1438368947?i=1000627185380

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/for-women-only-part-4/id1438368947?i=1000628046603

Follow Meghan on Instagram! https://www.instagram.com/meghantschanz/

Devi Abraham’s podcast Where Do We Go From Here, including my latest episode with her!

https://wheredowegopod.com/

https://open.spotify.com/episode/18eiTmiHvMimq3Oog80lq1

Follow Devi on Instagram! https://www.instagram.com/devi_writes/, and the Where Do We Go From Here on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wheredowegopod/

We take apart the “love and respect survey question at the end of this podcast:

https://baremarriage.com/2020/12/unconditional-respect-in-marriage-is-wrong-podcast/

Our book The Great Sex Rescue! It’s on MAJOR SALE in paperback on Amazon right now!

https://amzn.to/3LT6wXl

Our podcast with Meghan Tschanz about her book Woman Rising https://baremarriage.com/2021/0

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:
Join our Patreon and support our research for as little as $5 a month! https://patreon.com/baremarriage

Our op ed with Baptist News that goes over the points in this podcast: https://baptistnews.com/article/do-complementarian-men-do-better-a-response-to-nancy-pearcey/

Our initial article responding to Josh Howerton's claim that conservative evangelicals have the best sex and marriages

https://baptistnews.com/article/do-conservative-evangelicals-enjoy-better-sex-and-marriage-a-response-to-josh-howerton/

Our podcast going over these same points (for those who would rather listen!):

https://baremarriage.com/2022/04/podcast-do-christians-have-better-sex-lives-a-response-to-josh-howerton/

Leonardo Cruz' critique of how Nancy Pearcey handled history scholars https://leo-cruz.medium.com/nancy-pearcey-pt1-44f98c2a3602

Our book The Great Sex Rescue, based on our survey of 20,000 women https://baremarriage.com/great-sex-rescue/

The IFS report that showed that conservative highly religious men were far more likely to perpetrate intimate partner violence (p. 36):

https://ifstudies.org/ifs-admin/resources/reports/worldfamilymap-2019-051819.pdf

The book The Scandal of the Evangelical Mind

https://amzn.to/3r7BIe9

Check out our Biblical Manhood merch!

https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product-category/biblical-manhood/

Join Sheila at Bare Marriage.com!

Check out her books:

• The Great Sex Rescue
• She Deserves Better
• The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex
• and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex

And she has an Orgasm Course and a Libido course too!

Check out all her courses, FREE resources, books, and so much more at Sheila's LinkTree.

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Links to things mentioned:

• Get a FREE copy of Rebecca's new book, Untwisting the Scriptures #5 when it launches September 11! Just sign up for her FREE ebook now and you'll be notified on September 11! https://sendfox.com/heresthejoy
• Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month! Get exclusive access to our Facebook group, merch, and more perks! https://patreon.com/baremarriage
• Sign up for our FREE webinar with Wendy Snyder from Fresh Start Family! Disciplining with Compassion, Connection, and Firm Kindness: https://freshstartfamilyonline.com/baremarriage/
• My article that Rebecca Davis quotes in her book: https://baremarriage.com/2020/07/submission-debi-pearl-created-to-be-his-helpmeet-abuse
• See Rebecca Davis' whole Untwisting Scriptures series: https://amzn.to/45B0HFA

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Links to things mentioned:

Sign up for our FREE webinar with Wendy from Fresh Start Family: September 14 at 1 pm EST (recording will be available): https://freshstartfamilyonline.com/baremarriage/

Check out last year's podcasts with Wendy: Part 1 and Part 2

https://baremarriage.com/2022/05/podcast-how-to-misuse-statistics-for-dummies/

https://baremarriage.com/2022/05/podcast-connection-not-punishment-a-better-way-to-parent-feat-wendy-snyder/

Find Wendy on Instagram!

https://www.instagram.com/freshstartwendy/

Join our AMAZING Patreon group--we're launching our book study in our Patreon community this month as a test run! https://patreon.com/baremarriage

Check out our Limited Edition Merch--it goes away the end of August! https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product-category/limited-edition/

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Links to things mentioned:

Our Patreon! Join for as little as $5 a month and support our research while getting access to our awesome Facebook group!

https://patreon.com/baremarriage

Our Limited Edition Merch--it's only available until the end of the month! Check out these great beach towels:

https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product-category/limited-edition/

And don't forget our Biblical Womanhood merch that's available year-round:

https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product-category/be-a-biblical-woman-collection/

The Instagram Reel on Ken vs. Allan:

https://www.instagram.com/reel/CvNIHFxN86G/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

The Atlantic: The real reason South Korean women aren't having babies: https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2023/03/south-korea-fertility-rate-misogyny-feminism/673435/

The New York Times: Women in South Korea are on Strike Against Being Baby-Making Machines https://www.nytimes.com/2023/01/27/opinion/south-korea-fertility-rate-feminism.html

Carolyn Custis James' book Malestrom https://amzn.to/47HWqSh

Information on the Bechdel Test: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bechdel_test

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Links to things mentioned:

• Our patreon! Join our exclusive, behind-the-scenes group and get extra access to Sheila, Rebecca, and Joanna for only $5 a month!
• Our amazing Insulated Travel Mugs, that keep water super cold, and keep things hot, too! We've got them in a variety of designs, including Prayer and Tent Pegs, our She Deserves Better slogans, and our Biblical Womanhood Merch
• N.T. Wright's book How God Became King, and Rachel Held Evans' book Inspired: Slaying Giants, Walking on Water, and Loving the Bible Again
• The article from Desiring God that tells women to gaslight themselves
• Our podcast on how Emerson Eggerichs misuses Scripture, and our post outlining the main ways in detail

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Links to things mentioned:

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Links to things mentioned:

• Our Patreon! Support us for as little as $5 a month and get access to our amazing behind-the-scenes Facebook group, and more.
• Our Great Sex Rescue Toolkit–help for you as you talk about healthy teachings to your friends and church

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Links to things mentioned:

• Our Patreon! Support us for as little as $5 a month and get access to our amazing behind-the-scenes Facebook group, and more.
• Our Great Sex Rescue Toolkit--help for you as you talk about healthy teachings to your friends and church https://baremarriage.com/toolkit/
• Keith's Danvers Statement posts--Start here.
• Emerson Eggerichs warns against wives following into sin (watch the first few video clips and see his emotional response)
• Our Power of a Praying Wife podcast and download
• The Gospel Coalition's Instagram Reel about men being passive
• Our podcasts with Philip Payne: Part 1 and Part 2
• Check out Marg Mowczko's amazing website
• Why having the husband make the final decision can be a harmful shortcut

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Links to things mentioned:

• Join our Patreon! Support us for as little as $5 a month, and get exclusive access to our Facebook group--and even free merch!
• A Synopsis of all the problems in Power of a Praying Wife--with an optional download
• Gretchen Baskerville at the Life-Saving Divorce, and her book The Life-Saving Divorce. Follow her on Facebook and YouTube.
• Gretchen's articles with info on the effect of divorce on kids; the ACE study; and more.
• Sarah McDugal from Wilderness to Wild. Follow her on Facebook and Instagram and YouTube, or join her support groups.
• Sarah's free online course to recognize red flags of abuse, plus a slew of resources to help identify abuse.
• Sarah's article on how God honors free will: Happily (N)ever After, and Does God Say You Can't Divorce for Abuse?
• Keith's series on the issues with the Danvers Statement

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Links to things mentioned:

• Our book The Great Sex Rescue!
• Join our Patreon and support our work for as little as $5 a month. Plus gain access to our exclusive Facebook group, exclusive merch, and more!
• Our research methods for The Great Sex Rescue, with FAQs, and a Twitter thread analying our methods by someone we don't even know!
• Article from The Journal for Sex Research on the motivations for sex and the effects of obligation sex
• Article on the emotional work done by women during sex--The Other Third Shift? Women's Emotion Work in their Sexual Relationships

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Links to things mentioned:

• Our Patreon! Get free merch, access to our Facebook group, discounts on courses, and more!
• Todd Korpi's book Your Daughters Shall Prophesy: Amplifying the Voice and Place of Christian Women (https://amzn.to/3MWkPtH)
• Follow Todd on Twitter and Instagram

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Links to things mentioned:

• Our Patreon community! It's super fun, and it helps fund our research! Join us for as little as $5 a month.
• Our book The Great Sex Rescue, plus our two books that look into the sexual response cycle in detail: The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex and The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex.
• Emerson Eggerichs: His podcast where the clips were taken from, plus the podcast where we analyzed his advice to the woman crying the shower; the post where we went into this in detail; and the podcast featuring the woman who wrote in to Eggerichs.
• Dr. Laura Robinson's critiques of Beautiful Union. Here's Part 6 with links to everything (so go here, but then start at post 1 that is linked at the top and work your way through). In this podcast we focused on parts 3 and 4.
• My original Twitter thread about the visceral reaction that women have to sex advice.
• An article earlier this week about how pastors aren't necessarily the experts; lots of links to other well thought out critiques of Beautiful Union by Joshua Butler.

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Links to things mentioned:

• Our Patreon! Join us for as little as $5 a month, and get access to exclusive content while also supporting our research.
• Nijay's new book Tell Her Story
• Our podcast looking at how Emerson Eggerichs mishandles Scripture, featuring Nijay Gupta
• The audio version of She Deserves Better is now available! https://amzn.to/43tbmkp
• Our new She Deserves Better merch!
• Amazon Prime's new series Shiny Happy People (coming June 2)

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Links to things mentioned:

• Our Patreon! Support us for as little as $5 a month and join our exclusive Facebook group, plus help support our research!
• Our new book She Deserves Better--the audio has now launched!
• Our one-sheet download of the problems with Every Young Man's Battle
• Our podcast with Zachary Wagner, his new book Non-Toxic Masculinity, and his Twitter
• Andrew Bauman's book The Sexually Healthy Man and his Facebook
• Our Whole Story puberty course to tell your kids about sex & puberty!

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Links to things mentioned:

• Our Patreon! Support us for as little as $5 a month, and get access to our unfiltered podcasts and more. Your donations help support our next big survey coming this summer!
• Our new book She Deserves Better
• Beth Allison Barr's book The Making of Biblical Womanhood, plus follow Beth on Twitter
• Our books that are awesome for couples about to get married--The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex and The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex

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Links to things mentioned:

• Our Patreon! Support us for as little as $5 a month and get access to our exclusive Facebook group, unfiltered podcasts, and more!
• Our new book She Deserves Better!
• Aimee Byrd's book Recovering from Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, and her new book The Sexual Reformation
• Aimee Byrd's story of the bullying she went through in her denomination, and some more recent thoughts on the aftermath.
• Take the submission quiz yourself! It starts on p. 30 of this download, but you can also find the "bellies are intoxicating" on p. 24.
• The modesty podcast where we talked about the "bellies are intoxicating" statement.
• Our Hazardous Materials stickers to put on books you're concerned about

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Links to things mentioned:

• Our Patreon! Support us for as little as $5 a month and get access to our exclusive Facebook group, unfiltered podcasts, and more!
• Our new book She Deserves Better!
• Zachary Wagner's book Non-Toxic Masculinity, plus find Zachary on Twitter
• Our Hazardous Materials stickers to put on books  you're concerned about
• The Instagram Reel from thatdarnchat

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Links to things mentioned:

Our new book She Deserves Better:
https://baremarriage.com/she-deserves-better/

Support us for as little as $5 a month, and get access to unfiltered podcasts, our exclusive Facebook group, and more. Join our Patreon!
https://patreon.com/baremarriage

The Instagram Reel from 247 Marriage:
https://www.instagram.com/reel/CnetOgDhM1S/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

The podcast where we discussed "Girls Talk Too Much":
https://baremarriage.com/2023/03/do-women-talk-more-than-men-podcast/

The podcast where we were talking about how boys had to be superheroes:
https://baremarriage.com/2023/04/podcast-on-nice-guy-syndrome-and-boundaries/

If you're going to pull something out of your butt, it's probably crap merch:
https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product-category/out-your-butt/

Anti-Rape Raccoon Merch:
https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product-category/rabid-racoon/

Other Merch:
https://sheilawraygregoire.com/shop/

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THINGS MENTIONED IN THE PODCAST

• Our new book She Deserves Better
• Support us for as little as $5 a month, and get access to unfiltered podcasts, our exclusive Facebook group, and more. Join our Patreon!
• Article on the problem with “Nice Guy” behavior when it’s rooted in entitlement
• Our episode of Theology in the Raw with Preston Sprinkle (the interesting parts are from 30 minutes on)

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