The XX Files Podcast: Recent Episodes
Al & Courtney
The XX Files is an X-Files rewatch podcast with two queer intersectional feminists who really don't like the X-Files. Join Alison and Courtney on a spooky adventure as they re-watch and recap all 9 seasons of this cult TV classic.
Courtney and Alison watched S09E16 of The X-Files "William" – Listen and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as push-up goofs, judgemental farm wives, and why we're still talking about this bad, bad baby.
Courtney and Alison watched S09E15 of The X-Files "Jump the Shark" – Listen and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what happened in a whole other show we didn't watch, all about shartilage, and nature of "The Hot Dog Schism"
Courtney and Alison watched S09E14 of The X-Files "Scary Monsters" – Listen and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to throw the perfect Pig'n'Putt, what Pa is up to, and why this little boy is 2spooky4us,
The mutual aid fund mentioned by Courtney at the top of the show is the Emergency Release Fund, and we also encourage you Space Cadets to seek out bail support organizations and mutual aid groups who support the Black Lives Matter movement that's local to you.
Courtney and Alison watched S09E13 of The X-Files "Improbable" – Listen and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why God has a trunk full of individual jewel cases, and the reason we think that actually, for once maybe you should watch this episode.
Courtney and Alison watched S09E12 of The X-Files "Underneath" – Listen and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as yoked jesus, acceptable lawyer living situations, and all the stinkjuice that's fit to wade through.
Courtney and Alison watched S09E11 of The X-Files "Audrey Pauley" – Listen and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as mascot fear, coma classes and the most sexual pop hit of 2001.
Courtney and Alison watched S09E10 of The X-Files "Providence" – Listen and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as grown man baby heads, coma speed runs, and a new podcast record for blasphemy.
Courtney and Alison watched S09E09 of The X-Files "Provenance" – Listen and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as three men and a big baby, adult skinned knees, and a memorable trip to Fist City.
Courtney and Alison watched S09E08 of The X-Files "Hellbound" – Listen and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as big babies, bad babies, and how to be your own grandpa.
Courtney and Alison watched S09E07 of The X-Files "John Doe" – Listen and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as cinematographer fails, alternate gay romance realities and another fine chapter of The Nook Book
Courtney and Alison watched S09E06 of The X-Files "Trust No 1" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as Easter Schadenfreude, Internet Cafe Cyber-crime, and the Ballad of Pot-Boy
Courtney and Alison watched S09E05 of The X-Files "Lord of the Flies" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as our vital island updates, John Arbuckle yank crimes, and how the writers of the X-Files still manage to have gone their entire lives without meeting a single teenage girl.
Courtney and Alison watched S09E04 of The X-Files "4-D" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the character assassination of perfect old ladies, secret bed-sheet flavor savers, and what really honks.
Courtney and Alison watched S09E03 of The X-Files " Dæmonicus" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as Dinky the lost eighth dwarf, why Doggett is hashtag relatable, and what percentage of holy water is actually piss.
Courtney and Alison watched S09E02 of The X-Files " Nothing Important Happened Today Part 2" – and then Alison accidentally deleted the file before they could edit it so here's this instead.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the first episode of the FINAL season of The X-Files – S09E01 " Nothing Important Happened Today " – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as Xena's suspect origins, the great Wall of LeBron, and, proving that we are on the very cutting edge of the zeitgeist: CATS.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the ULTIMATE episode of Season 8 – S08E21 "Existence" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as blasphemous babes, serpent jingles, and how it feels when we try to comprehend the plot of this show.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the PENULTIMATE episode of Season 8 – S08E20 "Essence" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how is babby filmed, the ultimate X-Files cover-up, and the top 20 wing lubricants that every sauce boss oughta know.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E19 of The X-Files – "Alone" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as human juice-boxes, big beautiful lizard boys, and our thoughts on pizza hut fursonas.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E18 of The X-Files – "Vienen" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why we only talked about this episode for ten minutes and then launched into two separate backdoor podcasts. Enjoy!!
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E17 of The X-Files – "Empedocles" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such what God's doing in that dang rose, a suspect geography lesson, and how we managed to talk about this episode for 40 minutes straight -- It's a Christmas miracle!
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E16 of The X-Files – "Three Words" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to get into the incredibly secure Federal Census building, why Doggett's knees are sore, and how Mulder can absolutely kick rocks.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E15 of The X-Files – "DeadAlive" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what Monica Reyes is "open" to and how, over the course of 3 seasons, we managed to forget about the nano-robots in Skinner's blood.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E14 of The X-Files – "This Is Not Happening" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what space ranch is like, Alison's incredible new catchphrase, and whether or not this is, in fact, happening.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E13 of The X-Files – "Per Manum" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why this episode seemed like a literal fever dream, all our sex ed questions asked but not answered, and a heartfelt apology straight from the caboose.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E12 of The X-Files – "Medusa" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as our favorite length-based snack, who blasted what all over the Boston subway system, and whether Doggett truly loves his powerful wife.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E11 of The X-Files – "The Gift" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what this episode was about, the intricacies of human-shaped barf, and who the all-time most tempting X-Files character is.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E10 of The X-Files – "Salvage" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what if there was a little man in your colon, new corn-based smuggling strategies, and why Christ Carter insists on forcing us to talk about butt stuff YET AGAIN.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E09 of The X-Files – "Salvage" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as our first date movies, whether John Travolta and Nick Cage swapped dicks, and why this is actually just Terminator. That's not a pithy observation, it just like, is Terminator.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E08 of The X-Files – "Surekill" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what to do with all those extra rods and cones, the cultural implications of the meatloaf sandwich and why Doggett hates twins.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E07 of The X-Files – "Via Negativa" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why Doggett wants to murder Scully, all our nasty third eye desires, and what sequence of events caused this episode to go deeply, deeply off the rails.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E06 of The X-Files – "Redrum" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how a couple titans of Scandal spooked it up in the year 2k, the importance of succinct note-taking, and for some reason way too much information about some croissants Alison ate.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E05 of The X-Files – "Invocation" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as our best ghost tips for getting retribution, why ponies hate horny teens, and the only dang thing that Doggett cares about.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E04 of The X-Files – "Roadrunners" – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such how to summon a slug god, which poem Alison's college professor deemed 'too orgasmic' and why we actually enjoyed this episode. (Believe me, we're as surprised as you.)
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E03 of The X-Files – "Patience” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to kill a bat, how to seduce a bat, and whether Doggett is classically handsome (he is.)
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E02 of The X-Files – "Without” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what makes a special boy, the best way to find out if your friend is an alien doppelganger, and who's really the top Doggett around here.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S08E01 of The X-Files – "Within” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to be a good landlord, the best new cryptid in town, and how glad we are to see the best little boy in Arizona.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the ULTIMATE episode of The X-Files Season 7 – Requiem” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how that baby's head so big, the only thing Chris Carter thinks Scully is good for, and how Todd Howard finally finally finally killed Fox Mulder.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the PENULTIMATE episode of The X-Files Season 7 – "Je Souhaite” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how much glass Alison ate before recording, how to spot an incel, and all three of the wishes definitely historically wished by Tricky Dick and Mussolini.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E20 of The X-Files – "Fight Club” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what Cathy is up to these days, all about Alison's days at make-out creek, and how you're supposed to know whether something is funny-- oh wait! Mark Snow's got your back. ;)
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E19 of The X-Files – "Hollywood A.D.” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as whether Christ fucks, our favorite new Mitski hit, and the true origins of the Big Bang B-Word.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E18 of The X-Files – "Brand X” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as whether Mr. Sheffield went to 'Nam, what's evolving inside you, and-- wait, did Diane die?!
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E17 of The X-Files – "all things” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how much fucking was in Gillian Anderson's original draft of the script, why Courtney still hangs out on the Southside, and all the top hits for your fingerblast soundtrack.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E16 of The X-Files – "Chimera” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to give a good wedding speech as the gay sibling, all the different kinds of women Chris Carter can write, and the hottest new horror pitch no one's ever explored before: What If Birds Were Scary?!
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E15 of The X-Files – "En Ami” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as which bra is best when you're wearing a wire, whether Season 7 can possibly get any worse, and who is the target of the Double X-Files Cake Crimes Division's latest case.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E14 of The X-Files – "Theef” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to tell if your MRI has malfunctioned, whether it's okay for a doctor to do a murder crime, and who put that little dirt boy in your bed.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E13 of The X-Files – "First Person Shooter” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to objectify women using only a camera and sound design, why we keep watching this godforsaken show, and how much cake is in our shorts as of this recording.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E12 of The X-Files – "X-Cops” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the latest in gay fashion, how Cops is still on the air, and whether Alison was wrong about something for the first time in their life.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E11 of The X-Files – "Closure” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as where the good ghost children go when they pop up out of their little ghost holes, how everyone forgot about Smoking Man, and the shocking identity of the only person who can truly love Scully right. Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E11 of The X-Files – "Closure” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as where the good ghost children go when they pop up out of their little ghost holes, how everyone forgot about Smoking Man, and the shocking identity of the only person who can truly love Scully right.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E10 of The X-Files – "Sein und Zeit” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as major sock crimes, what fucking happened to Samantha for real tho, and a brand new #epcotfact.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E09 of The X-Files – "Signs and Wonders” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how many bullets it takes to kill a snake, the best cameo we've seen yet, and the problem with being lukewarm.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E08 of The X-Files – "The Amazing Maleeni” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to keep your head on straight, the best way to talk about your kinks in public, and why magicians can do infinite crime.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E07 of The X-Files – "Orison” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to ruin the sacrament, the difference between a necrophiliac and a "death fetishist," and why you might want to wipe down the vinyl before you slide on in to our fanfic nook.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E06 of The X-Files – "The Goldberg Variation” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as whether we respect Epcot and it's myriad fans, why this episode definitely wasn't filmed in Chicago, and how to apply to be Alison's new co-host (jk jk jk)
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E05 of The X-Files – "Rush” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what Ludicolo's "hat" is made of, how Alison survived their high school sleepovers, and whether we need a new drug.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E04 of The X-Files – "Millennium” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how much salt i can fit in my mouth, a concise naming of every book of the bible, and the latest pain in our asses.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E03 of The X-Files – "Hungry” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how many assholes a shark has, a return to eggs, and what the fuck a fluppy dog is.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S07E02 of The X-Files – "The Sixth Extinction: Amor Fati” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what the next season of Black Mirror is about, who your Rugsona is, and where on earth that egg came from.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the first episode of the X-Files Season 7 – "The Sixth Extinction” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to join the PEN15 club, everything we learned from the Rugrats Passover Special and what Alison has in common with the Little Mermaid chef.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the Ultimate episode of the X-Files Season 6 – "Biogenesis” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the bible man what built that big boat, why Skinner needs a bad boy, and whether we've learned even a single thing about the plot of this show.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the penultimate episode of the X-Files Season 6 – "Field Trip” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as whether we can land on a 2019 theme, all about that fancy fungi, and what it might sound like if Gilbert Gottfried tried to digest you with his thick piss.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E20 of The X-Files – "Three of a Kind” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to get the girl (stalk her,) all about our favourite yule lads, and what to do if you disturb a gerblin nest.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E19 of The X-Files – "The Unnatural” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as cactus grudges, Duchovny's writing debut, and the origins of the big beautiful game we know as based ball.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E18 of The X-Files – "Milagro” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the lowdown on Christmas meat, all the creeps that are fit to print, and why there's no romance in being a writer.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E17 of The X-Files – "Trevor” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as whether we're excited for Detective Pikachu, our important Shrek-based self-care activities, and the most difficult autopsy Scully has faced yet.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E16 of The X-Files – "Alpha” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as which Recess alumni got nasty first, whether it's time to take Scully off a pedestal, and why they say LA's streets are paved with gold.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E15 of The X-Files – "Arcadia” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the hottest new mailbox flavour, what our main man Big Mike from ER has been up to, and why Scully really needs that video camera.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E14 of The X-Files – "Monday” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to break into background acting, why this show's women continue to lack agency, and what Mulder's really keeping under the covers.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E13 of The X-Files – "Agua Mala” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the best place to grow primitive clams, diva cup innovations and what we're selling at the farmer's market this fall.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E12 of The X-Files – "One Son” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how you can be the King Midas of your own feet, our best closet strategies, and all the best ched from the Tillamook Zepplin Hangar.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E11 of The X-Files – "Two Fathers” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why we're on the outs with Gritty, all the best basketball slang and what cool new thing kids are doing with Subway sandwiches.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E10 of The X-Files – "Tithonus” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as where Dick Clark starts and ends, the best way to photograph a ghost, and how wearing shoelaces could be your... undoing.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E09 of The X-Files – "S.R. 819” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the best (or worst?) kind of yams, what robocop was really about, and the plot of Alison's flirty new drama series.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E08 of The X-Files – "The Rain King” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to be nice guy, Plane Juice: why so refreshing? and all the wettest weather wind-ups you've been waiting for.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E07 of The X-Files – "Terms of Endearment” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as if we'll ever see Diane again, how this show painted a gaslighting literal demon as a tragic figure, and the Great Wreath Conspiracy-- have we finally cracked it? CW: Please be aware that because we are recapping this episode of the X-Files, there is discussion of abortion, ableism and gaslighting.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E06 of The X-Files – "How The Ghosts Stole Christmas” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as lipgloss eaters, whether Mulder's Mom is still alive, and of course: bee science.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E05 of The X-Files – "Dreamland Part 1” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as dorm room bediquette, an in-depth expose on cat litter, and the one mystery we are able to solve: sex mirrors.
Join just Alison again for the thrilling conclusion that is XX Files Millennium Variety Hour Pt. 2 where, because they were too sick to record before Courtney went on vacation, they will perform for you a dramatic reading of the 4th act of the 2nd episode of Chris Carter's opus Millennium, and get pretty bummed out.
Join just Alison for the XX Files Millennium Variety Hour Pt. 1 where, because they were too sick to record before Courtney went on vacation, they will perform for you a dramatic reading of the 1st act of the 2nd episode of Chris Carter's opus Millennium, and a ukulele cover of the 1st track off Will Smith's 2nd opus, Willennium.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E04 of The X-Files – "Dreamland Part 1” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to keep warm during long Canadian winters, what the absolute hands-down worst state is, and how Chris Carter really feels about women.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E03 of The X-Files – "Triangle” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such whether we can sustain a serious conversation about the long-term effects of an American exceptionalist perspective, how to start a romance without agency, and why a long shot sometimes misses.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E02 of The X-Files – "Drive” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as our favourite niche youtube genres, the budgetary reckoning we've all been waiting for, and how no amount of stunt-casting can redeem an intentionally anti-semitic character.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S06E01 of The X-Files – “The Beginning” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as where cacti come from, who's on da woose, and what really inspired Guillermo Del Toro's monster fish-fucking epic, "The Shape Of Water"
We did it! We're finished Fighting The Future! Here's Part 4, now we can shuffle off to our eternal rest. What do you mean we have to start Season 6 next week?! This time we try desperately to answer such unsolved mysteries as whether the X-Files have re-opened for good (fart noise), whether the truth can set you bee, and how Mulder can lift Scully AND climb out of an antarctic ice tube when we all know he ain't that cut.
Everyone knows the best part of a feature-length film is it's 3rd quarter! It's time for Part 3 of Fight The Future. This time we try desperately to answer such unsolved mysteries as first kiss etiquette, the whole plot of this god damn show, and how many bones humans have anyways?!
I know you've been patiently waiting for Part 2 of our coverage of The X-Files: Fight The Future and the wait is over! This time we try desperately to answer such unsolved mysteries as the intricacies of regional playground nomenclature, how to properly ruin a palaeontology symposium, and (FINALLY) where dem bees at?!
Look, kids. There comes a time in every X-Files podcast's run when they have to confront the inevitable: some ding-dong executive in 1998 gave Chris Carter a cool 66mil to make an X-Files feature film. And now? We've gotta watch the fucker. Here's Part 1 of our coverage of The X-Files: Fight The Future, where we try desperately to answer such unsolved mysteries as how to make sure your skull stays impenetrable long after your death, why John Locke is here, and exactly which future y'all were tryin' to fight, on account of the one we're in sucks so bad.
Join Courtney and Alison for the ULTIMATE episode of The X-Files Season 5 – “The End” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to improve the long-cancelled series Baywatch, why we aren't allowed to take a rorschach test, and what we're all supposed to do now that the X-Files have been officially closed for the fifth consecutive time.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E19 of The X-Files – “Folie A Deux” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to effectively haunt your loved ones, what Alison's 'type' is, and all about our good ol' college days.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E18 of The X-Files – “The Pine Bluff Variant” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the hot (but not too hot) new way to eat soup, where we fall on the great popcorn debate: soggy V. crisp, and who our mysterious third host is...
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E17 of The X-Files – “All Souls” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what fresh Gatorade flavours we're pitching, who allowed us to discuss catholicism once again, and how Courtney managed to land a literal angel as a co-host.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E16 of The X-Files – “Mind's Eye” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how 90's television normalized ableist stereotypes, our top three jam flavours, and why those birds cluster on your lawn every night -- you know what you did.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E15 of The X-Files – “Travelers” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why this episode was supposed to have been interesting, what our upcoming modern art installation is all about, and the best thing on the menu at Old Spaghetti Factory.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E14 of The X-Files – “Patient X” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what the resistance could learn from Swiss Chalet, the difference between a rule and a law, and how to definitely not protect yourself from UV rays.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E13 of The X-Files – “Patient X” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to properly fertilize your boy farm, why Jeffy’s finally joining this family circus, and where you can find a bridge full of grade A primo yams.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap what may very well be the final episode of The X-Files: S11E10 – “My Struggle IV” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how William’s powers work, where Skinner’s headed off to next, what internet ailment may be more common than you think.
Hey Space Cadets! Unfortunately our coverage of 11×10 “My Struggle IV” has been postponed for a week due to Alison dealing with a pretty unpleasant throat infection, but we do want to share some exciting news with you!
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S11E09 of The X-Files – “Nothing Lasts Forever” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to modernize the eucharist, why Scully probably should have left the X-Files long ago, and whether or not we just accidentally watched that new CW show.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S11E08 of The X-Files – “Familiar” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what Alison’s day job is, what childhood TV character still haunts Courtney’s dreams, and why Diane is, once again, killing us.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S11E07 of The X-Files – “Rm9sbG93ZXJz” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why you should never sit in the front seat of a Whipz, how Footloose is about to get a whole lot looser, and where the heck our damn Ford money is, already?
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S11E06 of The X-Files – “Kitten” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why Courtney won’t have Alison’s back in a combat situation, who really started the tide pod panic, and what the best kind of salad dressing is, for any situation.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S11E05 of the X-Files – “Ghouli” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why this is the best possible incarnation of William, what kind of mileage you can expect from your Ford Explorer’s EcoBoost turbocharged four-cylinder engine, and how you can get Courtney’s attention from inside that sleek black bag.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S11E04 of the X-Files – “The Lost Art of Forehead Sweat” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such what our friend Reginald Fils-Aimé is up to, how Darin Morgan deals with his post-election pain and why we, frankly, don’t care.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S11E03 of the X-Files – “Plus One” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how a trip to the spa can change your life, what our long-awaited 2018 motto is, and why your doppleganger might just be the best wingman you’ve ever had.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S11E02 of the X-Files – “This” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as whether or not teens still have graveyard sex, how the ghost of Nancy Reagan is behind everything, and why we kinda liked this episode.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S11E01 of the X-Files – “My Struggle III” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as where doors come from, how to understand the ghost son living in your brain, and a formal dissertation on why we talk so much shit all the god damn time.
Content Warning: This episode does include discussion of sexual assault in the context of this episode and the X-Files canon overall.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E12 of the X-Files – “Bad Blood” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to get the most out of those hotel magic finger machines, why Chris Carter’s comments about Season 11 make us nervous, and how the hell Mulder got away with killing a child.
Note: This will be our last Season 5 episode for a while as we dive into Season 11. Our next episode, which will be posted on January 9th, 2018, will be “My Struggle III” (: all of our struggles). We will be back with Season 5 episodes after finishing off Season 11.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E11 of the X-Files – “Kill Switch” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what exactly is a poop sock, how to get through the Encarta Trivia Maze, and how to use a hammer effectively.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E10 of the X-Files – “Chinga” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why Alison needs to find a new DQ, how to take a ‘sexy bath,’ and the most polite way to split a lobster.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E09 of the X-Files – “Schizogeny” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what the hottest video james of 2018 is going to be, why animation meetings sometimes used to be held in strip clubs (hint: it’s misogyny,) and how to keep from murdering your step-dad during a particularly nasty hazelnut blight.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E08 of the X-Files – “Kitsunegari” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as our perfect knowledge of state sports, the best place to carbo-load before a psychic murder spree, and what it takes to be a fan favourite.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E07 of the X-Files – “Emily” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why Alison and Courtney refuse to pronounce words correctly, what happens to naughty children, and, of course, our very best pasta recipe.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E06 of the X-Files – “Christmas Carol” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to properly take a stool sample, why Scully is infatuated with an adult baby, and what Courtney’s real kink is.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E05 of the X-Files – “The Post-Modern Prometheus” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to punch down (A masterclass by Chris Carter,) what words mean, and why you’re killing us, Diane.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E04 of the X-Files – “Detour” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why Ponce de Leon still might be kickin’ it around the Floridian panhandle, who the hell Riff Raff is, and why you should stay away from bridges if you live in Chicago.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E03 of the X-Files – “Unusual Suspects” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how Mulder was born, why Dairy Queen keeps us coming back for more, and where each individual Lone Gunman member falls on our patented “good to look at” scale.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E02 of the X-Files – “Redux Part 2” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why we love this fresh new Samantha, who in the actual fuck Section Chief Blevins is, and most importantly: how to get away with murder.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S05E02 of the X-Files – “Redux Part 2” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why we love this fresh new Samantha, who in the actual fuck Section Chief Blevins is, and most importantly: how to get away with murder.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the first episode of Season 5 of the X-Files – “Redux” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why Grover Cleveland was our worst president, what you can do with one giant sperm, and why Mulder will always get away with murder.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E23 of the X-Files – “Demons” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how long it takes to get from D.C. to Providence, what Mulder and Detroit have in common, and some of the most hard-hitting journalistic questions you’ve ever heard in your god damn life.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E22 of the X-Files – “Elegy” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how you can get your egg to kiss the boards just right, why Kindergarteners are big pieces of shit, and who the newest WWE tag-team is.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E21 of the X-Files – “Zero Sum” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as things you didn’t know you could do with a bag of marshmallows, what Skinner’s hiding inside those nasty pants, and which song Alison wrote just for this episode.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E20 of the X-Files – “Small Potatoes” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what professions your dad shouldn’t get involved in, what the dankest new mary-jane moves are, and why Pharrell might be in your bedroom closet right now.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E19 of the X-Files – “Synchrony” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the many (many many many) problems with time travel, Alison’s favourite childhood snack, and far more than you wanted to know about our bathing habits.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E18 of the X-Files – “Max” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how Courtney answers some of philosophy’s most difficult questions, why we’ll miss Agent Pendrell (RIP), and what vital intel the ‘ChaBoy T. Alien will do anything to get back.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E17 of the X-Files – “Tempus Fugit” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why you can’t sing the happy birthday song in public, exactly what is in a seven layer dip, and why bisexual boys are perfect and deserve better.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E16 of the X-Files – “Unrequited” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as who Mario’s dating, how notto make the wrong choice when it comes to the “both ends” dilemma, and shockingly, some actual historical context for this episode about the Vietnam War.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E15 of the X-Files – “Kaddish” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as where to hide a precious family heirloom when you’re in a tight spot, how not to decorate your local print shop, and what Courtney’s most embarrassing story involving a donut is.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E14 of the X-Files – “Memento Mori” and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what sound is more annoying than a vuvuzela, the ONLY way to improve on GoGurt, and how we’ve managed to do the podcast for two whole years.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E13 of the X-Files – “Never Again,” and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what this summer’s best ice cream bars are, how you should eat something that has been birthed out of you, and why Mulder is still an actual piece of shit.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E12 of the X-Files – “Leonard Betts,” and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what happens when you cross a Deadpool with a lizard, what you should do about that awkward vestigial bone, and how this episode could have actually been hilarious road-trip buddy movie the entire time.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E11 of the X-Files – “El Mundo Gira,” and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how Courtney keeps her stairs so clean, the best ingredients for your hipster smoothie, and how to take a fairly bad episode of The X-Files and make it much, much worse: a master-class by Chris Carter.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E10 of the X-Files – “Paper Hearts,” and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the best way to spend your time in the bullpen, why your Grandma might like our podcast, and how it really, really, really should have ended.
(Content Warning: The X-Files episode “Paper Hearts” features a serial killer as well as child abduction and abuse, and those topics are also discussed on this episode of the podcast.)
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E09 of the X-Files – “Terma” and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to infiltrate a colony of feral sweater boys, the not-so-horny secrets of Grape Nuts, and the sad truth about horse crime.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E08 of the X-Files – “Tunguska” -and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the plot of the illusive Space Jam sequel, that apple thing I said happened last episode (whoops) and the answer to the age-old question: “Where’s the beef?”
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E07 of the X-Files – “Musings of a Cigarette Smoking Man” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how Lee Harvey Oswald’s soda choices affected history, the teen fashion trend that is Hawaiian shirts, and why we can’t stop collecting apples.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E06 of the X-Files – “Sanguinarium” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to incorporate a subtle motif, the magic of the “courtesy rinse,” and where your 90’s faves fall on our patented “boyband horniness spectrum.”
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E05 of the X-Files – “The Field Where I Died” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how Mulder does that thing with his face, what happened to our precious child, and who Alison and Courtney were in a past life. (The answer may surprise you.)
Content Warning: This episode contains discussion of mass suicide.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E04 of the X-Files – “Unruhe” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to kill Gumby, what the kids are calling dick pics these days, and the one thing people keep doing to women that they absolutely hate. (Hint: It’s murder)
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E03 of the X-Files – “Teliko” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as whether our penal code applies to snakes, how to calculate the angle of your dangle, and everything you need to create your own all-purpose homogeneous faux-ethnic soundtrack.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E02 of the X-Files – “Home” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the plot of their new gritty Ducktales reboot, who’s the best of the sandlot boys and how to spot small town gentrification before it sprouts.
Content Warning: Because of the content of “Home,” this episode contains discussions of body horror, infant death, incest and rape.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S04E01 of the X-Files – “Herrenvolk” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to prevent bee stings, why Courtney refuses to get the small-pox vaccine and where to get that dank extraterrestrial bud.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the ULTIMATE episode of The X-Files Season 4 – “Talitha Cumi” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to break Skinner’s heart, which of Alison’s crushes Courtney vehemently disapproves of, and what kind of water-based sports Mulder’s Mom was getting up to before he was born.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the penultimate episode of The X-Files Season 3 – “Wetwired” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as whose face Courtney wishes she could see when she wakes up (and literally everywhere else,) what brand new product pitch our hosts have come up with that will leave you satisfied in three separate ways, and the ultimate outcome of the hardest test the Lone Gerblins have faced yet – a game of FMK.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E22 of the X-Files – “Quagmire” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what Courtney has in common with frog scientist Dr. Faraday, whether the X-Files might actually be hinting at a much deeper allegory behind Queequeg’s namesake, and how to know when you definitely, absolutely, without a doubt, should NOT come a-knockin’.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E21 of the X-Files – “Avatar” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to manage to meet our barest expectations of human decency, whether it’s time Mulder and Scully to mind their own beeswax, and why Alison is the bomb dot com.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E20 of the X-Files – “Jose Chung’s From Outer Space” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as whether irreverent humour can forgive tasteless jokes, what does The Body good, and how unreliable your narrators are.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E19 of the X-Files – “Hell Money” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the internet’s very first meme, how to deal when smoke gets in your eyes, and what to do if a mustachio’d goose steals your heart.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E18 of the X-Files – “Teso Dos Bichos” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the brand new consumption craze Alison and Courtney can’t stop talking about, what it means when a man is not really a man, but is actually thirty rats, and, most importantly, how much jam is too much jam.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E17 of the X-Files – “Apocrypha” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why Skinner can’t be hypnotised, how Alison and Courtney failed to realize Dave Grohl is in this episode, and what particular problem they’d ask Man In A Can to solve for them.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E16 of the X-Files – “Apocrypha” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what Franklin D. Roosevelt knows that Mulder doesn’t, where all that goo comes from, and how Skinner got his groove back.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E15 of the X-Files – “Piper Maru” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as where our sweet sweaty Krycek has been, what kind of party you get down to at the bottom of the ocean, and why this episode is our nice-est one yet.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E14 of the X-Files – “Grotesque” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what to do with your favourite ornament now that the holidays are over, why Mulder’s suddenly hearing “Unchained Melody” by the Righteous Brothers, and the best ways to butter us up in 2017.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E13 of the X-Files – “Syzygy” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to write like the pros, the worst way to use Ryan Reynolds, and what the 90’s was really like.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E12 of the X-Files – “War Of The Coprophages” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to build the sweetest CH4 rig around, the trick to locating your most cockroach-vulnerable orifices, and how Mulder really make us feel.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E11 of the X-Files – “Revelations” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what to do when you’re allergic to chalk, how to deal with a stigmatism, and how many Kevins are required to make this plot make sense. (Hint: Just one would have been fine, honestly.)
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E10 of the X-Files – “731” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to protect yourself from Star Wars, all about post-mortem bowl cut caress etiquette, and how Alison and Courtney close the strange distance that’s come between them with their shared locomotophilia.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E09 of the X-Files – “Nisei” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as which support group instantly accepts Scully for who she is, how to stake out a roof-top in broad daylight wearing all black, and how to follow up the first half of a two-parter when all of the events contained within it were just so tenuously, microscopically connected.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E08 of the X-Files – “Oubliette” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how ‘Amburgers & Woot Beer once brought teenage Courtney unspeakable shame, who everyone’s newest favorite agent is, and why the writers of this episode passed up a story-line that could have been very good for one that is objectively very very bad. st.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E07 of the X-Files – “The Walk” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such how many bank robbery movies have been made in the history of cinema, what Alison and Courtney get up to during the witching hour, and whether this episode of the X-Files passes the “Bechamel” test.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E06 of the X-Files – “2Shy” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to write realistic female characters who online date in the mid-nineties, what this summer’s big blockbuster is going to be, and whether the real killer might have been right in front of them all along… ACK!
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E05 of the X-Files – “The List” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why this episode answered none of the questions in just the right way, all about erotically-charged entomological experiments, and how to handle the corrupt US penal system with all the subtlety of Chris Carter.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E04 of the X-Files – “Clyde Bruckman’s Final Repose” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how ‘Cha Boy Clyde Bruckman predicts Mulder will kick it, what our ultimate Scully aesthetic is, and how Alison was robbed (#alisonwasrobbed) of a prediction point.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E03 of the X-Files – “D.P.O.” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to best use Jack Black for maximum effect, why you shouldn’t finger the milk, and how lightning works. C’mon science, give it to us straight.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S03E02 of the X-Files – “Paper Clip” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as which former president is actually named Fred, how Alison and Courtney continue their work of taking the entire eastern seaboard to task, and why Krycek had better shape up.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the first episode of Season 3 – “The Blessing Way” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how long it’s been since Mulder showered, which Scully sibling we’re excited to see again, and who keeps coming in Skinner’s back door.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the ULTIMATE episode of Season 2 – “Anasazi” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to make love with all your clothes on, how to make an episode full of all the things our hosts love, and why are they even doing this podcast anyways?
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the penultimate episode of Season 2 – “Our Town” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how the kids get their drink on these days, the straight poop on eating brains, and how Alison and Courtney discovered which Barenaked Ladies song was written about this very episode.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E23 of the X-Files – “Soft Light” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how T.V.’s Monk is Alex Mack-ing innocent bystanders, what the Vancouver train station bathrooms smell like, and what truly horrid nickname Alison has come up with for a minor character this week.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E22 of the X-Files – “F. Emasculata” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to deal with a bad case of the pomples, the failings of the American Postal System, and what hot new energy drink craze is sweeping the globe.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E21 of the X-Files – “The Calusari” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as healing properties of hospital bee colonies, how to be a business boy, and a frank discussion of the small trains of the Greater Vancouver Area.
Happy 50th Episode, y’all!
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E20 of the X-Files – “Humbug” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the difference between a feral child and a dog-faced boy, what to do when you find yourself mindfreaked, and all about the true nature of comedy.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E19 of the X-Files – “Død Kalm” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the dangers of whaling, what important questions to ask when hiring a Norwegian boatsman (or picking people up at the bar) and why, even when on a boat in the middle of the Atlantic, you should avoid looking directly at Sodom and/or Gomorrah.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E18 of the X-Files – “Fearful Symmetry” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such how to Skype in 1992, how to get your thrills at the baby zoo, and the full breadth of the Magician Douche Spectrum.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E17 of the X-Files – “End Game” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as whether Mulder has as many sisters as he has daddies, how Scully dips a toe into the D-Plot, and what Alison and Courtney got each other for their one-year podcast-iversary.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E16 of the X-Files – “Colony” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the spooky creature lurking outside Alison’s window, what Dolph Lundgren might have learned from the King of Pop, and how to be respectful when giving your loved one a Baja Blast.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E15 of the X-Files – “Fresh Bones” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what Scully experiences in this episode that we never will, how director Rob Bowman apparently had a massive bone for our pal Frankie Ford Coppola, how much dem ghost bois love their Mickey Dick’s. Seriously, this last one is baffling.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E14 of the X-Files – “Die Hand Die Verletzt” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how Oreo the piglet found his way to the bottom, what the podcast’s new sitcom spin-off is all about, and how Courtney and Alison can remember so many 1990’s alt rock bands.
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E13 of the X-Files – “Irresistible” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as notable popsicles from their pasts, what Mulder doesn’t understand about workplace benefits, and how nothing gold can stay.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E12 of the X-Files – “Aubrey” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the eighties big rig and chimp-based sitcom we all missed out on, how the sheer depth of Alison and Courtney’s protective instincts for Sculder and Mully have grown, and how hereditary genetics one hundred percent, definitely, certainly, without a doubt function.
Join Courtney and Alison as they discuss S02E11 of the X-Files – “Excelsis Dei” – Please be aware that this episode of the XX Files is a frank discussion of the subject matter in this Season 2 episode, including rape, victim blaming, elder abuse and racism. We found it particularly difficult based on the filming location and the historical implications it holds for our city.
This was a hard one for us, but we would rather talk about it than avoid the episode altogether. Thanks for listening, but if you’d rather skip this one, we totally get it.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E10 of the X-Files – “Red Museum” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what former Canadian Prime Minister Jean Chrétien is doing in this small Wisconsin town, how to keep rural teen boys in check, and whether anyone will actually respond to our hosts incredibly personal questions.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E09 of the X-Files – “Firewalker” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the little-known weather-centric Tommy Jones disaster vehicle “Hail to the Chief,” where Mulder got his degree, and how to keep up the goofs when you’ve eaten your weight in pancakes in the middle of a summer afternoon.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E08 of the X-Files – “One Breath” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how Reiki works, what really happened to Charlie Scully, and how multi-platinum recording artist Sting could help you kill a ghost.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E07 of the X-Files – “3” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such how to get the most bang for your buck out of the visual imagery in your mis-en-scene, how the ladies of the XX Files like their yonic loaves, and the most fun you’ll ever have with twelve friends in a hot tub. Also don’t miss the official debut of our new segment “How It Should Have Ended” with an amazing intro jingle by the incomparable Sasja Smolders.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E06 of the X-Files – “Ascension” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such how to operate a Screamer Suit, the ultimate end-game of Mulder’s Daddy Agency, and the eternal question: If you don’t remember what happened in part one of a two-parter, is it still even a two-parter at all?
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E05 of the X-Files – “Duane Barry” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the Spring 2016 Course Catalogue at Sprott-Shaw Community College, what the aliens will do to yourovum, and how long Courtney and Alison can stay on topic before becoming distracted by pop-culture goofs.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E04 of the X-Files – “Sleepless” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as where Krycek fits into Skinner’s elaborate web of seduction, where to watch BabySWAT: the hottest new TV series coming to FOX, and how Alison and Courtney can live with themselves after the things they say to Chris Carter in this episode.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E03 of the X-Files – “Blood” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as where Mulder falls on the Bristol stool scale, which little goblin finds Scully the tastiest, and all about Alison and Courtney’s ideal shit-quit soundtrack.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S02E02 of the X-Files – “The Host” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to escape Skinner’s Otter Basement, why Courtney can’t go to the bathroom any more, and a recap of the greatest marine murder trial of our generation. Plus, a follow-up interview with SFX artist Brad Proctor, who made his X-Files debut on this episode.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap jump right back into the “good” stuff: S02E01 of the X-Files – “Little Green Men” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as who Mulder’s new sugar daddy is, whatever happened to Jorje, and how to pronounce the name of the classic board game “Stratego.”
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the ‘ultimate’ episode of the revival: S10E06 – “My Struggle II” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what life would be like if we could taste through our fingers, what Alison and Courtney really think of Dubai, and who the baddest bitch in the Baby Sitter’s Club was.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the “mysterious beings” who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their (pretty offensive) stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S10E05 – “Babylon” – and learn about real garbage mysteries such as what the model train club is up to, who fucking scored this episode, and how we all got magically transported into a tone-deaf television drama circa 2003.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S10E04 – “Home Again” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what Tim Armstrong from Rancid has been up to, how to ignore the irrelevant flesh golems that get in the way of your murder investigations, and the ultimate quandry: do people still eat froyo?
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S10E03 – “Mulder And Scully Meet The Weremonster” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to be the worst FBI agent you can be, how to exeunt like Ryan Beil, and how we convinced former X-Files SFX artist Brad Proctor to spend twenty full minutes in a sound booth with a couple of bone-heads like us.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap Revival, Episode 2, “Founder’s Mutation” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as them blood eyes, closet BJs, and who the hell this William kid is.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the first episode of the X-Files in thirteen years: S10E01 – “My Struggle” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such how Chris Carter got his groove back, what on earth happened to Kevin, and how everything you think you know, you don’t. (Maybe. Probably. Kind of.)
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap the X-Files Season 1 Finale: S01E24 of the X-Files – “The Erlenmeyer Flask” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the best place to keep your alien foetuses, whether Courtney’s predictive abilities make her our very own X-File, and how to get that sweet, sweet finger money.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E23 of the X-Files – “Roland” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as what is a Mach and how badly does it suck and/or blow, and what it will actually take to get Alison and Courtney to stop in the middle of a podcast, and the ultimate mystery: will our dynamic duo even be able to make it through the final episode of the season, or will it be simply too dumb to watch?
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E22 of the X-Files – “Born Again” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why children are growing up into vengeful cops so fast these days, the best and worst ways to wear a scarf, and what good ol’ Joseph Stalin has been up to lately.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E21 of the X-Files – “Tooms” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as why Skinner is always talking to thin air, the newest techniques in forensic facial reconstruction technology, and why Courtney will never use a toilet again.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E20 of the X-Files – “Darkness Falls” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to not be a total boner, the best way to comment on a dead man’s business, and how volcanoes can ruin your vacay.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E18 of the X-Files – “Shapes” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to do a high five down low, how Mulder inspired Alison’s upcoming musical, and how blood works.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E18 of the X-Files – “Miracle Man” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to to survive the modern plagues, the best place to lay on hands (WINK EMOJI,) and whatever happened to Northern Getaway.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E17 of the X-Files – “E.B.E.” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to construct the perfect lie sandwich, why all of Canada’s founding fathers had eye patches, and whether a red pen is really just a red pen.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E16 of the X-Files – “Young At Heart” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how overworked the FBI’s human resources department must be, why you should never invite Scully to your cello performance, and that hot new hand surgery that all the kids are into.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E15 of the X-Files – “Lazarus” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to show love through biting, how even ugliness is beautiful, and that time that Alison almost very nearly died. (Mom, you can skip this one.)
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E14 of the X-Files – “Gender Bender” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the thumb-crotch: nature’s secret erogenous zone, where horses live, and how to completely botch an episode ending. Or, just the whole episode really.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E13 of the X-Files – “Beyond The Sea” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as whether you can save your own life by sweating profusely, why we can’t wait for Mulder to get shot again, and how you can actually make a pretty decent episode of television if you just chill the fuck out, already.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E12 of the X-Files – “Fire” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as where Mulder banged his former British bae, whether your local Home Depot carries rocket fuel, and how Supernatural’s Crowley feels about the dog from Frasier.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E11 of the X-Files – “Eve” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as who the fuck Doctor Sally is, why everyone’s so worked up about the taste of their soda, and whatever happened to the classic film “Maze” by Tim Henderson.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E10 of the X-Files – “Fallen Angel” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as the Ronald Reagan Memorial Star Wars Electric Space Fence, how Mulder managed to keep his job, and the best way to get your junk vaped.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E09 of the X-Files – “Space” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as The Man On The Mars, how that sweet 20th Century Fox cash gets spent, and what happens when an overall-wearing extraterrestrial meets a Russian teenager.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E08 of the X-Files – “Ice” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as extraterrestrial bubonic plague, the difference between an homage and a rip-off, and why it’s called Ovaltine, anyways.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E07 of the X-Files – “Ghost In The Machine” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as 90’s voice-matching technology, how many is too many when it comes to dutch angles, and how Alison and Courtney failed European Geography.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E06 of the X-Files – “Shadows” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as canine water sports, how Mulder met Predator, and just how many completely untrue things Alison can get away with saying.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E05 of the X-Files – “Jersey Devil” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as Scully’s love life, Mulder’s sex life, and what makes a healthy diet for a Golden Retriever.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E04 of the X-Files – “Conduit” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as thirty-year-old teenagers, whether there are forests in Iowa, and how Alison truly feels about Agent Mulder.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E03 of the X-Files – “Squeeze” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as how to tell old white men apart, when death will finally come for Alison, and how to afford a house in Vancouver.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E02 of the X-Files – “Deep Throat” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as flying Doritos, Seth Green’s secret illuminati background, and the ultimate enigma: Mulder’s smell.
In our world, unexplained phenomena are represented by two separate, yet equally important groups: the mysterious beings who perpetrate these events, and The FBI Agents who investigate them. These are their stories…
Join Courtney and Alison as they recap S01E01 of the X-Files – “Pilot” – and learn about amazing unsolved mysteries such as Mulder’s hair, how to make a good first impression on your co-worker, and what to do about a man made of bees.