Juan on One Coaching: Recent Episodes
Juan R. Arroyo Yap
Welcome to Juan on One Coaching, where we believe we not only have the right to control our lives, we deserve to create it.
We seek more than success. We desire significance.
I discovered a pattern today. An environment that continues to repeat throughout my life.
*_In high school,_*** my passion for honesty, thoughtful action, and integrity help me create the perception of being a know-it-all. A spoiled brat who slammed doors and books when things didn't go his way. Due to this behavior, I alienated many people. I felt out of place. And, only a handful of people took the time to go beyond appearances and seek to understand me.
*_In college,_*** I used my high school experience to keep to myself and just do the class work. I didn't make any friends. I didn't go out. I spent most of the time by myself. I felt out of place because I wasn't interested in what classmates where doing and didn't have someone to have meaningful conversations.
*_In corporate,_*** I got better at building relationships and working with others. Yet, my passion for challenging the status quo and doing the "right" thing for our customers and coworkers, became a reason for people to believe, once again, I was a know-it-all. Things got worse after I passionately pursued leadership development. I only felt safe having transparent conversations with a handful of people.
*_After corporate,_*** I came to realize that all those relationships I had during my corporate days, where mostly superficial and most people didn't really care enough to stay in touch. Furthermore, add the lack of support from the closest people in my life, and once again, I find myself feeling out of place and tackling the world alone.
_What's the message? What's the lesson to be learned?_
I'm not really sure about the answer but I can share the 2 ways I'm thinking about it.
# Option 1 - It's what I created and deserve
Whether consciously or unconsciously, I can argue that I created the loneliness and limited friendships based on the idea that's how life should be or that something is wrong with me.
This is the opinion I have had for some time. Since my corporate days, I take 100% responsibility for my circumstances and feeling like the oddball is a result of me not being able to adapt my message to the groups I am a part of.
For many years, I thought I was doing everything wrong. I still have those moments, today.
# Option 2 - I'm simply talking to the wrong crowd and in the wrong place
Currently, this is the idea I am more invested in. I think that, while I definitely had responsibility in creating the 4 scenarios, I have been trying to make myself fit in a box I do not belong.
I started believing this when I noticed the same message didn't connect with my immediate network but did connect with people outside of my network.
My challenge has been believing in this perspective strongly enough so that I stop trying to get my current network to buy into my message. For whatever reason, I continue to try to mold myself to a place I do not seem to belong.
Thus, I'm working on expanding my network and finding those who need and want to listen to my message. I do not fully know where are they but I do know they exist.
*_I'd love to meet those successful professionals who have reached a point in which work has taken over their lives and they no longer fill challenged and fulfilled by what they are doing. They have succeeded at the expense of the time for the things and the people they love. They want to change things but they are afraid of what others may think and their performance declining._***
If you know someone who is probably in this situation, I'd like to meet them.
If you are that person, let's setup a time to chat.
Be well,
~Juan
Every now and then I like to challenge the status quo. This time I'm ignoring the best practices and just acting based on inspired ideas.
I'm thinking this is going to generate better experiences for me.
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Whenever I coach someone who is struggling to move forward, I usually start by asking where they want to go.
Most of the time, the response is a flavor of getting away from the current challenge instead of sharing the vision for their ideal situation.
I know the feeling because I have done it before. I have spent 99% of the time thinking about the problem and forgetting about why is it a problem in the first place.
For the past 12 months, I have been attempting to follow my own practice and clarify my vision. I dislike admitting that my results have been inconclusive.
For whatever reason, the vision exercise is not helping me focus my energy.
Instead, what's getting stronger is the feeling that I should go back to my roots, walk in faith and just action inspired by instinct rather than logic.
Thus, that's what I'm going to be testing going forward. I am going to structure my day based on inspired ideas.
On the surface, it appears I am contradicting myself. Yet, I am not.
My purpose is to create a life in fully customized to who I am becoming. My internal compass is currently telling me to walk in faith. I have already tried the rational way and haven't seen the results I want. Thus, I'm trying a different way.
Only time will tell whether I am right or wrong.
Here goes a reinvention of Juan.
Be well...
I have been at war with myself. On one side, my body is asking me for rest; on the other, it asks for action.
The result? Mental burnout.
After the previous episode, I had to ask myself what did I do to bloom where I was planted.
Here's what came up...
# 1. Invest only in those who appreciate, acknowledge but don't focus on the rest.
While I wanted everyone to value my message, I had to learn getting everyone involved was more detrimental to my health than investing time with those who naturally valued what I brought to the table.
In the beginning, I thought my passion for leadership development was like bacon. Something everyone should be excited to eat. Then, I remember there are plenty of people who dislike it and many others who have zero interest in trying it.
Once I stopped expecting for everyone to join my crusade, things got a lot better.
# 2. Commit to stand for something
I was able to build a following by being consistent with my message and being willing to share it.
Early on, I focused on standing out by doing what everyone else was doing just faster and better. Once I choice to go against the grain, it's when it became easier for me and others to determine whether it was a fit or not.
# 3. Be willing to pay the price
As I said before, as soon as I started sharing my voice, separation began.
Some people felt threaten and started questioning my credibility. Others simply stopped talking to me. Many look for ways to criticize and use workplace politics to stop me. And, only a few, showed active support.
In the end, I had to be willing to deal with the consequences of choosing to chart my own course.
I believe these 3 choices helped me create a sense of autonomy that allowed me to feel in control within and environment that didn't value my passions and talents.
Let's say I was taking the nutrients from one place and blooming in a different one.
I hope this gives you ideas to create your own universe and bloom where you are planted. If you are looking for a resource on the culture, I think [Jon Gordon's book, The Seed, could be useful.
Be well,
~Juan
Here are 2 stories that helped me understand the power of environment.
Do me a favor, I'd like to know how your environment has fortified or limited your success.
Today, I'm reflecting on my progress so far thanks to a phrase from Simon Sinek
We should never let reality interfere with our dreams. Reality can't see what we can see. ~Simon Sinek
Today, I'm passing along advice from Mel Robbins (5 Second Rule Author), that I thought was very practical.
The end of the beginning. A new phase is starting to come. I'm not sure what it is but I do know this daily message is not doing it for me these days.
The content is good but I don't feel in alignment with it anymore mainly because I am unconsciously doing it expecting an outcome rather than sharing from my space of greatness.
Another change is coming.
I have been listening over and over to the book Supercoach, hoping to find the answers to my current riddles.
Here's a story from the book to serve as reflection for your day.
I heard this concept from Jim Kwik and I didn't think much about it until now.
I thought to pass it along and see if it triggers an insight.
What do you think is your top question driving most of your behavior, currently?
It's likely you go out on a walk or watch the news and think life is not fair.
In this one I share a different perspective.
Share with me what ideas come to mind.
I wanted to pose the question and learn a little more about your mindset and how you are approaching your life and career.
This is something that I do with my clients and it proves to be a valuable to to bring awareness to how aligned are things in your life.
Comment below with your answer.
I'm looking to support 6 individuals who have gotten to a point where they feel stagnant or bored at work. Maybe, they are feeling unchallenged and want to grow and develop but don't enough guidance.
If this is you or you know of someone in this situation, contact me via this link>>> https://shor.by/juanononecoaching so we I can learn more about where you want to go and your current situation.
Have you ever been curious about those movies in which enemies become allies for the benefit of saving mankind?
Have you wonder if that happens in real life?
When a team lacks performance and fails to bring everyone together, it's mostly likely due to their inattention to results. A situation that's created by the absence of a unifying goal.
Watch for the final piece of the five dysfunctions of a team.
No trust = No conflict = No Commitment = Low Standards
High performing teams are comfortable holding each other to high standards. But before that happens, this needs to be present.
Watch and learn.
Share below how you apply this concept and what makes it easy for you.
You have seen it. You have probably done it.
It happens often and it's the biggest hindrance in getting a team to achieve the results they want.
Share below what you think.
Continuing with the 5 Dysfunctions of a Team overview, today we talk about the second dysfunction...conflict.
It's what a lot of people avoid under the pretense of respect and being nice.
Whatever you think about conflict, it's important to recognize that all great movies have it. It is a required element of high performance.
Listen and share your thoughts below.
I was running out of ideas so I decided to look at my library of books and discuss one of the books I have found useful.
I picked The 5 Dysfunction of a Team by Patrick Lencioni.
Here's the 1st dysfunction and stay tuned for the following 4.
Comment below with your questions and ideas.
Plenty of people I know use the word. They believe it to be a problem. Yet, they don't realize it doesn't really exist. The the feelings they are experiencing are actually a result of a lack of something much more important.
Watch the video to learn what is it.
Subscribe to stay in touch, and comment below with your ideas on the matter.
This is a message to myself. I think it can help you determine whether it's worth listening to someone or not.
Comment below and share your own answers.
It happens to all of us. We are going about our business and then we noticed some thing aren't happening the way they should.
Someone is always late, a process is flawed, an individuals continues to ignore your messages, etc.
What do you do?
If you are like me, you complain a little, bring it up to the responsible party and then wait for it to be fixed. You did your job, right?
I beg to differ.
Listen in and comment below what thoughts come to mind.
The first time I got fired, I was forced to evaluate what I was doing with my life and how was it possible to fail when I was following what others called "best practices."
I doubted myself. I lost my confidence. I was afraid I would never get it back.
Thankfully, I figured out what I was missing and started implementing these 2 concepts that helped me regain my confidence, go against the grain, and chart a new course for myself.
We spend a lot of time building systems and checks and balances to ensure someone gets the job done on time and as expected.
There's a simpler way to do this...
Comment below what methods have you used and which one has been the most effective
Thoughts and #Prayers is a common phrase given the latest tragedies in gun violence.
What's interesting about this approach is that posting it on social media is not necessarily equal to taking action to address the problem.
We seem to have a tendency to believe that by sharing something, we have done our job and fixed the issue.
Taking meaningful action involves more than that.
Comment below with your insights about this topic.
This is one of the mistakes I made when I started leading. It's the lowest level of influence as a leader and it's effectiveness doesn't last much longer than a few months.
Comment below if you have ever said "She is a decent leaders but I wouldn't go to war for her."
I have experienced it. I have heard many others say it.
Expanding on yesterday's topic, I wanted to share 2 ways I used to delegate tasks.
Comment below what has worked for you or what do you keep struggling with.
Most will want to say they won't do that but the fact is that every leader had to go through this phase.
I haven't met a leader who didn't do this. Many won't admit it was a mistake but it won't change the fact they did it.
Let me know if it happened to you when leading a team, a project, a school assignment, or a volunteer group.
To receive this message in your inbox, send me an email to hello@juanononecoaching.com
This is related to my 5 Step Program to Design The Life You Deserve. Download it at https://juanononecoaching.com/5steps
It happens often but we rarely notice.
Comment below if it has happened to you.
Have you noticed a change in your personality depending on your circumstances.
In business terms, they talk about wearing different hats.
Well, in the DISC Method, the congruence of the personas helps determine the quality of your well-being.
Get your assessment at https://juanononecoaching.com/communicationtips
We all know those individuals who prefer to be left alone. Who avoid interacting with others.
We may think they are anti-social. In reality, they have a superpower to ensure things are done the right way and with excellence.
Meet the C-Personality.
Download your tips sheet at https://juanononecoaching.com/communicationtips
Comment below and share what you have learned and tried so far.
The Maxwell DISC Method discussion continues.
Get your summary sheet at https://juanononecoaching.com/communicationtips
I have covered how to identify a primary personality. I have discussed the dominant and the influential types.
Today, we talk about the most prevalent type of person. The one that all companies and teams need. Without them, nothing would succeed.
Watch to get to know them.
Comment below what you are learning.
Get your 1x1 session with me and your 31-page report at https://juanononecoaching.com/communicationtips
Continuing the DISC personality assessment overviews. Today is the day for those people to love to be the center of attention. They like popularity. The love making friends.
Get your summary sheet at Juanononecoaching.com/communicationtips plus the opportunity to meet 1x1 with me.
Enjoy this one and share in the comments what are you learning now.
Today, I'm giving a little bit more information about the D personality.
Listen in to get a little more context and what you can do to have better interactions with that person who only seems to care about results.
Remember to download your cheat sheet and have a chance for your personalized results and a 1x1 coaching sessions with me to know how to implement these tactics. Visit juanononecoaching.com/communicationtips
In yesterday's video I shared about how to identify someones personality style by using their biggest fear as a benchmark.
Today, I give you a 2 question technique you can use to also identify their style. Whichever method you use, understand that it is not a foolproof method. There are ranges in the scale and there can be combinations of styles depending on the situation.
Nevertheless, having this tool at your disposal can save you a lot of heartburn from miscommunication.
There's a special offer for taking an in-depth assessment of your personality style at juanononecoaching.com/communicationtips that can tell you what are your strengths in a team environment, how to interact with others based on your style and give you an outline for a development plan.
Remember to download your cheat sheet at juanononecoaching.com/communicationtips also.
We spend a lot of time learning a bunch of techniques to influence people but we invest very little is getting to know them.
Here's a trick to benchmark someone's personality style and use that knowledge to improve your relationship with them.
Download your tip sheet here https://juanononecoaching.com/communicationtips
You have heard it many times, we are the average of the 5 people we hang out with the most.
This exercise is one I have to do in order to regain control of my agenda and set boundaries for relationships that weren't helping me.
Give it a try and comment below with your thoughts and findings.
I do this with coaching clients and it help them avoid getting lost in the details.
Try it out and let me know how well it works.
It can reduce stress, reset your focus, and restart your momentum.
Watch and comment below what you think.
I know this trap very well. I do it all the time. I sit down to resolve a problem and immediately focus on why each idea is not going to work.
Hours later, I'm still frustrated about having a problem and convinced there's no way to fix it because "I have tried everything!"
So here's a bulletproof way to fix your problems.
Send me a note or comment below with your solution after watching the video.
The idea and phrase I'm sharing with you today is one I have said several times in the last year or so.
Sometimes the turning point is a strong emotional event. Other times, it seems like it just blends in and slowly presents itself.
Nevertheless, it's something that seems to be a required step in your journey from here to there...from success to significance and fulfillment.
Comment below and let me know your "rock bottom" turning point.
I was inspired to do this some time ago but have been holding back on it out of fear.
Today, I give it my first try and see what comes out of my mouth.
Many experts share very little about their tough times. When they mention them, it's a high level overview that quickly transitions into a story of success.
I'd like an opportunity to read your reactions to this message in the comments below or with a direct message.
It's an idea I'm still processing. I heard it from Michael Neill in his book Supercoach.
Comment below to let me know what's your reaction to the idea.
The title is self-explanatory.
A few days ago, I had a nightmare. I lie. I was more like an upgraded version of past memories.
This is one of the most painful things to notice since I started this journey of self-employment.
It applies to you, too. Disregard at your own peril.
Comment below and let me know how you deal with this situation.
One of my favorite things to do is to convert a life marker into a life maker. There's only one way to do it....reflection.
In this last category of the Leadership Game Assessment tool, participants get a chance to expand and reflect about the experience they had.
Today's activity, addresses the biggest success gap in the world...
Watch to find out what is it.
Remember to subscribe and share your answer in the comments.
Schedule your team assessment by visiting https://juanononecoaching.com/leadershipchallenge
This category is probably my favorite of the Leadership Game.
It's designed for the participants to show their appreciation for other team members.
How do you show your appreciation to your colleagues?
Schedule your team assessment at https://juanononecoaching.com/leadershipchallenge
Continuing to share the activities in the Leadership Game assessment tool. Schedule your session at https://juanononecoaching.com/leadershipchallenge
Today, I'm covering an activity in the "Organization" category.
Many people in leadership position like to brag about how good they are, or at least, they like to show off their position.
At the end of the day, this one testing environment determines whether they are good leaders or not.
Watch or listen to find out how you can start preparing yourself to lead.
Increase your team's effectiveness by scheduling your session at https://juanononecoaching.com/leadershipchallenge
I continue to share the different activities included in this team assessment tool I use with clients when they are looking for a fun way to deal with their challenges.
Will you pay the price required to change?
Watch on to find out this engaging way to gather feedback from your team regarding your current challenges.
Schedule your session by visiting https://juanononecoaching.com/leadershipchallenge
I continue to share from this amazing assessment tool.
Today, it's a debate activity.
Whether you agree or disagree with the statement is up to you. The learning comes when you choose your opponent and what others vote on.
Watch to learn to apply by end of day.
If you want to know more, comment below or visit https://juanononecoaching.com/leadershipchallenge
Today, I present to you one of the tools I use to assess teams and develop action plans to improve performance.
It uses entertainment as a way to discuss subject that otherwise wouldn't be openly brought up in conversation.
I'll probably do this for the next several episodes.
Register for more information here: https://juanononecoaching.com/leadershipchallenge
Comment below your answer to the questions in the video.
I have been sicked for a few days and didn't feel like coming up with an idea so I decided to read some quotes and see which one inspired me most.
Here's a simple description of what I can do for you as a coach.
Comment and let me know how I can serve you.
This is one of the exercises I use with my clients. It's used all over the place but the rarely use it as a tool to design the life we want.
Give it a go, and let me know your findings.
Subscribe, share, teach...
I was in a coaching session a couple days ago and I said something that I never really considered before.
It relates to this classic positivism advice that "we are always at the right place and where and when we are supposed to be."
This phrase is used to encourage people to shift to the perspective that we can learn from every moment.
Yet, in this video I raise a question about this advice...
Comment to let me know what you think...
In 2013, when I started pursuing to passion of becoming a leadership trainer, I started a blog with the expectation that everyone had to like what I wrote.
I needed everyone to support my cause. Otherwise, I wasn't doing a good job at sharing my message, or my message wasn't any good.
I was wrong in this belief, but the feelings were real.
Today, those fears have evolved but I have figured out I don't need to be liked by everyone.
Watch the video to find out what's one thing that helped me overcome this fear.
It's my shameless attempt at a riddle inspire by what happened to me playing baseball tonight; and a years old memory.
Watch the video to find out what happened.
Share what comes to mind in the comments.
If you are in my Balancing Success & Passion Facebook group, you probably saw me do this in a FB Live session.
It helped me tremendously is finding a calm assertive state of mind and I want to share it with you.
Let me know what you discover with the exercise.
Also, message me to hello@juanononecoaching.com if you are interested in studying this book by James Allen, for a short 4 weeks.
Be well,
~Juan
If haven't listened to yesterday's episode, please take a moment to listen to the story I shared. It serves as the foundation for today's thoughts.
Youtube: https://youtu.be/QHK2wVmbXgk
Podcast: https://anchor.fm/juanononecoaching/episodes/Episode-109---It-All-Comes-Back-To-You-e4iaei
Blog: https://wp.me/p33wca-1bf
Don't forget to send your insights from the story via e-mail at hello@juanononecoaching.com or join the Facebook group to have a discussion around it https://www.facebook.com/groups/juanononecoachingcommunity/
Or comment below.
We seem to spend a lot of time thinking the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. What if the color of the grass was all a mirage created by our own view of the world?
Today, I just want to share with you a story I read in the book, Supercoach, by Michael Neill.
I'll let you reach your own conclusions.
Send me a note or comment with your reactions to the message.
One more thing, forgive my accent...
We spend too much time thinking about the future and planning days.
It seems the only reason why we look at the past is to remember the good old days, criticize our mistakes, or regret missed opportunities.
Here are two ways to make your past more useful.
Don't forget to comment or hit reply and let me k ow what is one thing you need help with right now.
In the prior 2 videos, I talked about identifying the causes of the problem, and a 4-step method to determine what to do to regain control of life.
Today, I'm sharing a simple tactic to keep your priorities and focus your energy in chunks.
I'd like to know what other tactics you implement to keep the main thing the main thing. Send me a note with your ideas.
Too many people I help do not truly know what they want. They seem focused on what they are trying to avoid.
But, if you don't know what you want, then how would you be able to get there?
Here are 4 easy steps to take advantage of this situation.
If you have seen the Work/Life balance miniseries, then you know I don't believe in balance as the optimal situation.
The question that follows is how do I achieve work & life integration?
Here's my take on the subject. Feel free to add your own techniques and tactics in the comments or send me a note to hello@juanononecoaching.com
I have accepted a more forgiving way to approach work/life balance.
Recall the keywords: obligation, separation, stagnant, and harmony/integration
I don't know about you but I rather have a job that I don't need a vacation from in order to feel better about myself and my life.
Pick one person you know, and share an idea that to you as you watched or listened to this message.
It cool to balance life, but we aren't mean to stay that way.
Suppose you obtain the perfect balance between work and life, how long do you think it will take for you to sense a calling to do, be, or have more?
Recall the keywords: obligation, separation, stagnant, harmony/integration
Keep the conversation going by sharing this episode with someone you know who can benefit from this perspective.
In the previous episode I shared a little about how I believe our life gets out of alignment due to us feeling obligated to meet someone else's expectations.
Recall the keywords: obligation, separation, stagnant, harmony/integration
Today, we are talking about separation.
What does that have to do with work/life balance?
Watch or Listen in to find out.
And, don't forget to subscribe or invite someone you know who can benefit from our discussions.
Work/Life balance seems to be a hot topic for decades. It keeps getting hotter with the advancement of technology and our apparent addiction to be at work for long hours so we can brag about it.
As I start focusing on my mission to help those who have sacrificed "life" for success, I want to share a few personal ideas about this so called "work & life balance" myth.
The working keywords are: obligation, separation, stagnant, and harmony.
The aftermath of 100 continuous lessons is one life-changing moment.
It's nothing out of this world. It's definitely something I have said many times before. It's probably the most common advice all successful people give.
Unfortunately, I don't think there's a way to teach it; you have to live it.
My request of you? Send me an e-mail and let me know what questions you need answered once I share my life-changing lesson.
Send your questions to hello@juanononecoaching.com
The house is 86 degrees Fahrenheit. The thermostat screen is damaged. The fan works but the AC doesn't cool.
What would you do? What do you want?
Here's a silly idea that came to me last night as I was replacing the Thermostat.
I actually think how a person approaches this situation can say much more than a resume can.
Send me a message and let me know how you would tackle this issue.
hello@juanononecoaching.com
In episode 97, I talked about the 4 WHOs that affect our work/life balance.
Today, I want to share something I heard from Sarah Prout that is related to the being part of creating the life we desire.
It's the first time I have heard someone explain it in more practical terms.
Don't forget to subscribe, share it with someone, or reply back to let me know what you think.
In reflection this morning I realize there are 4 different people that can affect how I perform in my business and life.
I also realized the same 4 people were present in my journey from being enslaved by my job to being free to create a life according to my principles.
Send me a message and let me know which one seems to control your life most.
"It will never be done...It's impossible...", said the director. A few years later, a couple rookies made it happened. They created a Microsoft Excel version of a pricing model that was considered impossible to mimic in MS Excel.
This happened after several people tried to accomplish the task.
What was different? The lack of prior knowledge and expertise.
The difference was entering tackling the task with little past information or direct work experience.
It's like a baby entering this world and discovering the world.
The past 18 months, I have been trying to answer one of the most important questions in business: What do you do?
Supposed to attend a networking meeting, what would be your answer to the question?
The last principles of success is one that doesn't have scientific explanation. It's something we all have experienced but don't necessarily know it is happening.
https://juanononecoaching.com/thinkandgrowrich
It's a clever phrase I hear many experts use in their speeches: "the answer is always 6 inches in between your ears."
While its totally sensible, I haven't really understood its importance until I read it in the context of Think and Grow Rich.
It's simple. It's brief. It's powerful. It's puts all the pieces together.
Have you ever wonder why you write down your goals, daily affirmations, and new year's resolutions, but not all of them get accomplished?
Or maybe, you commit to create a new habit but it never sticks.
It's because we forget what really causes things to happen.
No. This is not a diatribe about the act but a thought about how powerful it can be when the emotions attached to the notion of sex are funneled into a specific purpose.
This is the least talked about principle from the Think and Grow Rich book. It's understandable due to the topic. And, I admit I'm not very verse on the principle presented by Hill.
But, here's my current interpretation on the matter.
Continuing the TAGR's 13 Principles of Success, this one is about multiplying our capacity to create new solutions to our problems.
It's a concept that most of us are aware of but we rarely use properly.
Even science talks about it in the characteristics or closed vs. open systems.
May you find a way to start implementing this principle immediately.
Many of us fall into the trap of thinking that everything in our to-do list "needs to" or "has to" get done.
While it may seems that way, I discovered that most of the items are usually creations of our imagination in order to feel better about ourselves.
There's a way to validate our 'obligations'. Here is one way to do so.
I walk into my manager's office. The HR person lets me know my role is being eliminated.
Later on, my manager says, "I'm sorry, I hard a difficult time defending your contribution."
This can be taken as me not doing my job, but was a different matter. Because the next sentence was something similar to, "You have helped this department a lot, I just didn't know how to explain it."
Listen to the video for what I have learned about that moment.
Working hard is not enough to be financially secure. Doing the right things is not necessarily enough to guarantee success.
We see this law at work all the time. We even use it to make decision about how we spend money. Yet, we may not be fully aware of it.
If you apply this law to your life, you'll start seeing the opportunities to continue to succeed.
It's so ridiculously simple that you'd realize you already know it.
The difference? You are probably not applying it because it's so simple that you think it's easy.
Leadershift
One of the most challenging concepts to implement is the idea that we don't have to do anything, we just have to be.
I have a hard time explaining it because it doesn't make any sense.
If I sit still and do nothing forever, I'll die.
I think pets and babies have the answer to my dilemma.
Just wanted to share an experience I'm going through right now that is different from what I have heard before and it may be of benefit to you.
It's pretty simple.
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Find a passage of a book that connects with you at a visceral level. Something that helps you find some level of peace; at least for a moment.
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Read the passage internally or out loud and listen to the words.
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Take a piece of paper and pen or pencil and write the passage down.
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Do it for 5 days in a row.
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See what you notice.
Keep in mind, this is read and write not listen to and type.
Let me know what you discover.
More context in the video.
It's counter intuitive and also it's part of the way the universe works.
Every guru mentions it, we all seem to accept it as a fancy quote but very few actually internalize it and believe it.
Here's my experience with it.
Jon Gordon takes the credit for the title of this episode. Napoleon Hill is the source of inspiration for its content.
"POVERTY is attracted to the one whose mind is favorable to it..."
Listen in to find out how this works.
It's not how can I do it but how much do I want it.
I'm coming to realize that it all comes down to willpower. The power of the will fueled by the intensity of our desire.
If you don't want it badly enough, you will simply give up quickly.
Thus, how much do you want to have a life where you wake up energized because you get to do what you love and interact with the world freely?
The more I understand the principles of personal growth, the easier it is to accept we are meant to be tested.
There's a little truth to the phrase "if it were easy, everyone would do it."
I invited you to join the TAGR study at https://juanononecoaching.com/thinkandgrowrich
This is a little different way to think about the usual stuff but it made sense to me.
Have you ever consider how you are able to move in any direction?
Have you ever thought about what needs to happen in order for you to go to your favorite coffee shop?
There's a school of thought that beliefs all decisions should be logical. I started believing all decisions are emotional.
That said, there's a difference between making emotional decisions and deciding when we are emotional.
Today, I share my current thinking on this topic.
Let me know your thoughts.
Those who know me, can attest that I dislike plans. I have heard all gurus talk about the need for having a plan and working it.
My aversion to them doesn't have to do with planning but the meaning to assign to the plan itself.
Listen in to see if you commit this mistake...
Today, I share a quote I read in the book "Right Now", by Steve Chandler.
The implication of the statement is powerful and needs deeper reflection.
I invite you to join me in discovering the meaning behind these words...
I'm the 1st one to judge myself on any mistake. I use those judgments as amunition to prepare better or to demand all of me when I commit to do something.
I used to think negative reinforcement was useful but, today, I realized it only feeds into my self-sabotage.
This three words can open the door for positivity to enter your life quickly.
I have a tendency to become aware of patterns that reduce my productivity. This is a follow by self-judgment and some version of punishment.
Well, here's a more useful way to re-frame your mindset and start the process of positive change.
It's not about titles or fancy marketing, or a perfect elevator pitch.
Yes, those are important but not as much as the main objective.
Find a need, determine the problem, fix it.
I have been living with extreme polarity. I jump back and forth between what I didn't do and what I haven't done or still needs to get done.
Have you found yourself doing the same?
It's like I'm always in a place of lack. I'm never good enough.
How can I accomplish something if I'm in a state of constant stress?
I have started reading a book called "Right Now: Mastering the Beauty of the Present Moment", by Steve Chandler.
I thought it interesting that his first chapter relates to Step 1 of my 5 step program to create a life worthy of you.
How many labels do you use to describe yourself and your situation?
Have you ever considered those labels a limiting factor?
Here's my first reaction to the book.
In a conversation with my coach this morning, I became aware of 2 challenges that are delaying my progress and success.
One is my relationship with money. The other is my lack of faith my evolution from employee to business owner.
Today, I want to share things I believed in that no longer serve me; or maybe, they never did.
I submit to you to take a moment to reflect and see if you have been misplacing your faith, too.
This is a new concept I became aware of while listening to an interview about a book called "Spiritual selling."
It's not a religious book but one that focuses on inner congruence and full acceptance of who we are at the moment.
It's giving me a new perspective on my current situation.
Let me know what you come up with.
We seem to be very good at this when we are children but it gets programmed out of us during our schooling years.
Then it comes back to haunt us as a way to think about all the things that could go wrong.
We think it is only a children's thing, yet we don't notice it is a key ingredients for how we have created the life we currently have.
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We claim to have no time for what we truly want to do with our lives.
We claim to need more hours on the day.
Yet, if I were to shadow you for an entire day, will I see you using every single minute of your day effectively?
It doesn't mean you have to be "working" all the time. This is only an exercise of aligning actions with goals, and words.
It's time to take inventory.
There are people with Master's and Doctorate degrees that are struggling to make a living.
How much do you know? How much is that knowledge helping you create a life that fulfills you?
Better become intentional with what you are learning.
One of the mistakes I make when setting goals is to go through the motions of repeating it but not really feeling the need to do anything.
Positive affirmations don't work unless we can have an emotional attachment to it.
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All progress comes from raising our awareness.
Many of us like to demonize certain habits and patterns of thinking. We talk about the lizard brain as if it's an enemy to conquer.
But what if it wasn't our enemy but a protector. How would that change our relationship with ourselves?
As I have gone through the personal development journey, I have found myself falling into one of the 4 levels of excuses.
It's a very clever way our mind uses to make us think we are making progress but still don't necessarily accomplish what we truly want.
Many know about the concept of conscious vs. subconscious mind; few, use it to their advantage.
Napoleon Hill understood very well how the mind works and he dedicated several chapters of his book, Think & Grow Rich, to explaining how to use it to our advantage.
We use this tool all the time, we just don't notice it.
The more I move through life, the more I noticed how my thinking shapes everything I experience.
I'd like to think others do things to me but the truth is that I am creating my universe by the way I interpret and think a out what happens to me and around me.
Change your thinking, change your life.
There's a big different in what those who have gone the way can speak into than those who have never tried.
Sure, it makes sense when you read it, but it begs the question, why are you still listening to your parents and friends advice if they have never done what you are trying to accomplish?
There's no such thing as a self-made millionaire. It doesn't matter what people may say, there's always a need for some variation of a sullort system.
Unfortunately, the ego has a way to sabotage us by telling us we don't need to ask for help, or that asking for help is for weak people.
I'm on the lookout for people that can remind me of what I am trying to accomplish and why.
I don't need any more people raising more doubts and questioning all my actions.
Today, I'm remembering the times when I lived for the weekend and had a job instead of a life.
What I used to do is let someone else dictate my agenda and what behaviors where acceptable.
Over time, I discovered I was more pleased when I got to do something I truly enjoyed on a daily basis.
Find your top 3 things you enjoy doing and find ways to do at least one of them every single day.
Have you ever caught yourself saying something you don't really believe in?
Have you set goals that you think you can attain but can't bring yourself to get fully behind it?
Creating the life you desire requires more than logic and passion...
The advances in technology like machine learning and artificial intelligence are making it very easy to understand the things that are driving our current results.
Many want to blame social media for the loss of the younger generations but I tend to look at it with a different perspective.
I think social media and smartphones are a mirror to our mind.
Thus, if I take a few minutes observing your social media usage, I'll be able to determine how you operate.
There's a point in our lives when we lose sight of what it means to live.
We focus so much on playing the game of life that we forget we are more than players.
Being present in the moment is one of the most satisfying thing we can experience.
It's time to focus more on being and less on doing.
Sounds stupid but there's obviously a twist.
There are many people who are already dead but they haven't made it official.
Most of us, join the workforce as a way to live for the paycheck as opposed to just live.
Quitting your job is the first step towards having a life of fulfillment.
Here's how I did it.
Just a quick challenge for the day.
We leave is a world where we try to manipulate each other daily. Not with ill intent but by hiding what we truly feel and think in any given situation.
I admit there are things that need to be kept private or wait for specific moments to be shared.
Notwithstanding, it's interesting to notice how much we hide behind politeness and political correctness.
Excerpt from Think & Grow Rich, Chapter on Desire, as shared by Napoleon Hill from a poem by unknown author.
===
"I bargained with Life for a penny, And Life would pay no more, However I begged at evening When I counted my scanty store.
"For Life is a just employer, He gives you what you ask, But once you have set the wages, Why, you must bear the task.
"I worked for a menial's hire, Only to learn, dismayed, That any wage I had asked of Life, Life would have willingly paid."
======
Something to think about.
It has been a challenge to stay productive.
Have you ever got to the end of the work day know that you have been busy all day but still feel like nothing got done?
I have found myself creating work for myself just to be busy but not necessarily moving closer to my goals.
It is easy to fall into this trap because we have been programmed to think our value is based on how much we produce.
This is a quick exercise to evaluate your week and plan the next.
It seems to be part of what we do.
Most of us don't like it.
But the truth is that it is necessary and expected when we pursue something we have never done before.
We have talked about learning from failure. Yet, Napoleon Hill presented a different spin on the idea over 80 years ago.
I seem to be pretty bad at this up until now.
It's so simple that one thinks it's dumb.
Have you ever setup a plan or strategy and never looked at it again?
If so, how many times did you succeed with that approach?
The fact is that repetition and the combination of emotions with thought is what creates lasting change.
Hope you give these steps a try.
I cannot recall how many times I heard the advice to "not burn my bridges" throughout my years in corporate America.
It's a similar phrase to "better safe than sorry"
But, what if those bridges are keeping us tied to the past? What if they are preventing our progress?
Here's a thought from Napoleon Hill...
We are preached about having a vision, goals, and a plan. But before those come into play, there's something much more important...DESIRE.
Continuing with the Introduction to Think & Grow Rich....Today, I share a line that has baffled me for some time.
If you take a moment to read or listen to it with an open mind, you may gain an insight that can get you unstuck.
It's election day in Panama and the power of choice is in my hands.
I laugh at people trying to be strategic with their vote not because it's silly but because in many ways it is a clever way for people to cede control to someone else.
It's okay to listen to feedback but the decisions you make should be made in harmony with your values and principles and forget if your candidate has a chance to win or not.
Harmony matters more than winning.
I continue to read through Think and Grow Rich as I prepare for launching a mastermind of the book and creating a FREE mini-course about the 13 Principles.
Today, I read a few lines regarding the mandatory trials and tribulations we must face as we pursue a life worthy of us.
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As I continue to prepare for my Think and Grow Rich mastermind (details at https://juanononecoaching.com/thinkandgrowrich), I am relating it to my journey and my 5 Step program.
I have had a "plan" for the past 6 months but I admit it's not working. The way I have made some revenue has been through unexpected mediums.
Yet, I find myself forcing myself to continue with the original plan.
Stupid...but, human.
I'm getting better but I am nowhere near where I can be.
Let me know what you of this concept.
Hope to see you in the study.
"Everything is created twice", I heard my mentor say.
What do you mean? I thought to myself.
He then proceeded to give a 45 minutes teaching on the statement.
Here's my attempt to sharing what I am learning as I'm preparing for a mastermind I'm inviting you to participate in the next several weeks.
Wish me luck :)
You can check the details at https://juanononecoaching.com/thinkandgrowrich
Last chapter of the book the 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth. The Law of Contribution - Growth Enables You to Grow Others
It seems very easy for us to think we don't have anything special. IT seems like everyone else is better than we are.
Yet, we fail to recognize we don't need to be miles ahead of everyone to help someone else. We just need to be a few steps ahead.
Learn how to use your expertise here - https://bit.ly/JuansExpertSecrets
Let me know who you are helping.
Second to last chapter of the 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth, The Law of Expansion, Growth Increases Your Capacity.
As I take more time to reflect, or distract myself from reflecting, I recognize a few things as to why I find myself getting a little bored.
The problems seem too easy. And the problems are too easy, I tend to overthink things and take too much time deciding what to do.
Have you gone through similar situations? How have you dealt with it?
The Law of Modeling states it is hard to improve when you have no one but yourself to follow.
These days I think we all follow other people but we rarely notice we are doing it. Unchecked, our habits will continue to feed our current set of beliefs and ensure we stay in the same place we are and halt all progress.
"No one but yourself to follow" prompts a couple views for me. I share them with you in this note.
Today I just wanted to jump in and share how difficult it has been for me to rest and slow down.
I am very aware that rest is necessary in order to maintain our mind, body, and spirit in full harmony.
Unfortunately, the world wants us to believe that 24/7 connectivity requires us to always be doing something in order to be of value to the world.
ALL LIES.
But, like you. I am still learning to apply this to my life. It's a daily struggle.
I run into many people who claim to be open-minded but they approve every interaction with the world with the intent to agree or disagree.
I do it, too.
Yet, the most life transforming conversations I have had with people, happen when I only stay present in the moment, and allow myself to explore and discover the world as is.
Listen on for the example.
Maybe that will get you thinking.
I continue with the energy of the prior message under the framework of the Law of Trade-Offs: You Have to Give Up to Grow Up.
You are probably tired of reading the same idea. You probably think you do it well enough. But if you do, why don't you have what you truly want already?
Why don't I have what I truly want, already?
It's a journey. It's a process.
This one is really more for me than you. This one lets you know that I am aware of the situation. It's raw. It's unpolished. And it still generates some level of pain and frustration.
I'd like you to know because I don't see many people sharing some of these situations out of the possibility of creating a negative image on their services and their value.
Listen, Watch or Read at your own peril.
We here it all the time, yet we insist on ignoring the suggestion.
We like to think we dislike change. At the same time, we seem always be seeking fuller expression of ourselves. We want more out of life.
It's a constant fight for territory.
There's a famous quote attributed to Lincoln.
It talks about how any decent person can handle adversity, but their character really comes to be tested when they are in a position of power.
I just did a Facebook Live in Spanish talking about how we, Panamanians, like to complain about our government's corruption while we break rules/laws at the same time.
For me, the character tests started happening when I was given a position of leadership. It was a regular adventure of asking myself if I would do the right thing even if it cost me my job.
What would you do? Have you ever imagined yourself in a position of power and wonder which decisions you would make?
It's easy to criticize from the outside...as we do with celebrities when they break our expectations of them...or when famous people are found cheating on their taxes or spouses.
But, if you where in their shoes, understanding their full context, would you make the 'right' choice?
Would you?
I have no unbiased idea as to whether it's working or not. All I know is that there's little physical evidence to show to myself that it is.
Now, I should know better...and I do. Unfortunately, my ego is strong and "wants" to see evidence before making a decision.
Thus, I have spent many months, going in circles; and in the end, pretty much break my own "rules" of being me.
Maybe, these worked for you...Maybe, you have new ones...Maybe, it's all working and I just can't see it.
You decide.
For the last few years I have been going through a slow death.
I cannot verbalize it properly but I know it is happening and I'm fighting to stay alive even though it is a necessary outcome.
I'm not sure where this leads but there definitely a lot to swallow.
I was reflecting on Thursday about the idea of one of your inner circle people betraying you. What would I do?
What if it is a way for us to start becoming who we are meant to be?
I simply wanted to share the main teaching of chapter 8 in the 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth. And let you go on your day.
Let me know which one is most challenging for you.
Today, I'm going back to 2012 when I'm called to my boss' office to be told I need to pack my things and find something else to do.
It was a painful moment, not necessarily because I was told my job was done but because I couldn't accept the nerve of my manager to let me go after a few months before he directly asked for my help.
Oh well...
Continuing with the 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth and sharing my journey from corporate spreadsheet monkey to business owner as a catalyst for conversational insights as a coach, speaker, and trainer.
Today is the Law of Pain - Good Management of Bad Experiences Leads to Great Growth.
I may stay on this for a few days. I think I have some personal stuff to share on this topic.
Hope it helps you on your journey.
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This is one of those thing I don't do very well. I have some in place but the truth is that I don't stay consistent with it. And, many times, I consider it a hindrance.
But, it seems to be a necessity in order to guarantee progress.
Let me know what's yours...
Many seem to be living for the weekend. When Friday comes around, they scream "Thank God is Friday"
I have to admit, I did the same but for different reasons that most.
Continuing with the Aftermath of Being laid off.
It's a little sad but it is true.
When I stopped filling an immediate need for people, I became irrelevant to them.
Remember, most people are focus on surviving. They aren't waiting for us to be in need so they can help.
As I continue to process the "death of the soul", I share 2 things that I have had to deal with as part of this transformation from caterpillar to butterfly
The journey to create a life deserving of you carries a price.
But know this, the price you pay is much lower to the reward obtained from waking up and realizing you are living a life filled with the people you love, the activities that give you energy, and the things that fully represent who you are.
May this serve as an invitation to my journey while you also walk yours.
“Whether you are a success or failure in life has little to do with your circumstances; it has much more to do with your choices.” - Nido Qubein Everyone knows this one but limited people actually do something about it. Some people even use it as an excuse for their lack of success.
Pay attention to what and who you surround yourself with.
The fact is we are creatures of habit. Habit beats willpower. Habit causes us to do something even without us thinking about it.
Sure, motivation is a good starter but it is not what keeps you in the game.
Someone wiser than I said, "Do the thing, and then you get the energy to do the thing."
What say you.
Something happened to you.
-
A big scare...
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A betrayal...
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An accident...
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A massive success...
-
A lovely experience...
Most of the time we remember the bad stuff but these two options apply both ways.
Listen along.
I tend to dwell on my past, especially my mistakes, a lot.
I find ways to criticize myself, and wonder what if I would have done it differently.
We can say whatever we want about changing our past. But the question here is "should we really change it?"
Continuing with the 15 Laws of Growth book.
Chapter 3, The Law of The Mirror, is about self-image. It's all about what you see in yourself and how it impacts your actions.
Interestingly, we like to look at other people before we look at ourselves.
Here's why that doesn't really work.
Many times I have reflected on my opportunity to play professional baseball. Not with regret but with a curiosity to learn what went wrong so that I can prevent that mistake from happening again.
In the past, I spent more on junk food than personal development.
The fact is that I can spend more on entertainment than developing my talents and pursuing my dreams.
Why is that?
Do you happen to do the same?
"It's impossible to consistently behave in a manner inconsistent with how we see ourselves. We can do very few things in a positive way if we feel negative about ourselves." ~ Zig Ziglar
Related to the 5 Step Program To Creating A Life You Deserve
Continuing with my journey to discover myself, I had to really become aware of whether I wanted to keep going in the actuarial path or not.
Here is a list of keywords that helped me get the process started
Awareness, Passion, Realism, Mentors, Willingness, and Timing.
If you do the exercise, you'll be able to start living with intention.
Whenever I'm coaching someone, I am quick to identify the likelihood of success of the journey. It's not right away, but there are definitely signs.
Yes, it sounds like I am judging. And, it's really more about the mindset they have while they share their experience and responses to my questions.
Here are 3 ways to get your journey started.
Want to know more about DISC Behavioral Assessments? Check https://juanononecoaching.com/communicationtips
We are very clever when it comes to fighting for what we don't want.
We seem to prefer staying where we are than going through a little discomfort to get what we truly want.
Here are 8 reasons why we remain stuck.
Share at will
Most of our problems aren't real. Most of our problems have a simple solution.
Find out which...
Share, comment, ask, do something.
I played baseball for 9 years in a row. Yet, after all those years I wasn't really at my best. My best happened 6 years after I stopped playing...this is how I did it.
Share subscribe, comment, critique...
As I walked my path of intentional living, I recognized that a lot of the success came from unexpected help and ways.
We have to understand that when we make plans towards a future goal, we are making them based on what we know at that specific moment.
As time goes by, and we take the steps towards the goal, the plan is going to change because everything is changing.
Be open to unexpected ways to do what you love.
https://juanononecoaching.com
When we start living intentionally, we will start encountering many critics.
The business world wants us to learn how to give feedback; but the fact is that many people just don't know what they are talking about.
Here's what you should do with your critics.
I heard the phrase from one of my mentors, Ed DeCosta. His program was all about conquering our inner critics.
Which is part of Step 4 of my program...Confidently Filter Your Critics.
https://juanononecoaching.com
When I started walking the path towards living intentionally, following through with priorities was the most challenging part.
You can use the 3 Rs System by my mentor John C. Maxwell (Required, Rewarding, Return); but, at the end of the day, what matter is that you follow through with it.
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Once you know what you stand for, it's time to take intentional action and claim your space.
This is where the rubber hits the road. This is where you start paying the price of marking your territory.
https://juanononecoaching.com
Having natural ability for something doesn't make you an expert or an All-Star. In order for our talents to be useful, we have to put in the time and effort to perfect them.
The path to creating a life worthy of you, requires that you focus on the tools that can produce the most value for you.
https://juanononecoaching.com
Values give flavor to what we do. They can help us make decisions and stand out, assuming we are aware of what they are.
Step 2.3 - Discover your values so you can better connect with others.
"Man's only limitation, within reason, is the development and use of his imagination." ~ Napoleon Hill, Think and Grow Rich
Whether you want to treat it as child's play or ignore it as a cliché statement, having a dream to shoot for is a necessity on your journey to create a life worthy of you.
It doesn't take you any more energy to imagining the positive scenario than all the negative things you think about how other people are out there to get you.
Step 2 of my 5 Step Program to Create a Life Worthy of You: Courageously Discover Your Light
Lots of gurus talk about the importance of having a purpose. I seem to agree. It doesn't have to be fancy. It doesn't have be to a magical experience. It is simply a matter of having a specific intention behind everything we do.
It is there, you just have to become aware of it.
We are much more than our possessions, physical appearance, behaviors, and thoughts.
On my journey from here to there, I had to first passionately challenge everything I thought I knew about myself.
I threw all the cards on the table, and only picked the ones that truly felt represented me instead of holding on to what others, including my parents, wanted me to be.
You don't have to be great to start but you do have to start to be great. ~ Commonly attributed to Zig Ziglar.
This is my journey from Success 2 Significance. I have no idea where it will go. I have no idea what will come out of my mouth. Yet, here it goes anyway; because whatever is at the other side of the tunnel, will be an opportunity to help others find their way to create a life worthy of them.
https://juanononecoaching.com