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The Flop House

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We think this one broke Elliott, guys. We watched the only film Leonard Maltin walked out on: Zoolander 2. Meanwhile Dan totally nails a Mario impression, Stuart decides which Roger Rabbit weasel he is, and Elliott admits his fedora-wearing past. Wikipedia synopsis for Zoolander 2 Movies recommended in this episode: A Shot in the Dark Postcards from the Edge Love & Anarchy

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We think this one broke Elliott, guys. We watched the only film Leonard Maltin walked out on: Zoolander 2. Meanwhile Dan totally nails a Mario impression, Stuart decides which Roger Rabbit weasel he is, and Elliott admits his fedora-wearing past. Wikipedia synopsis for Zoolander 2 Movies recommended in this episode: A Shot in the Dark Postcards from the Edge Love & Anarchy

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We think this one broke Elliott, guys. We watched the only film Leonard Maltin walked out on: Zoolander 2. Meanwhile Dan totally nails a Mario impression, Stuart decides which Roger Rabbit weasel he is, and Elliott admits his fedora-wearing past. Wikipedia synopsis for Zoolander 2 Movies recommended in this episode: A Shot in the Dark Postcards from the Edge Love & Anarchy

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We think this one broke Elliott, guys. We watched the only film Leonard Maltin walked out on: Zoolander 2. Meanwhile Dan totally nails a Mario impression, Stuart decides which Roger Rabbit weasel he is, and Elliott admits his fedora-wearing past. Wikipedia synopsis for Zoolander 2 Movies recommended in this episode: A Shot in the Dark Postcards from the Edge Love & Anarchy

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We discuss The Last Witch Hunter. All other witch hunters presumably having been herded into the sea by the Red Bull. Meanwhile Meanwhile Elliott explains man-witches, Dan looks to an extreme James Bond to save a wounded nation, and Stuart is obsessed with billiards. Wikipedia synopsis for The Last Witch Hunter Movies recommended in this episode: Help Session 9 I Married a Witch

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We discuss The Last Witch Hunter. All other witch hunters presumably having been herded into the sea by the Red Bull. Meanwhile Meanwhile Elliott explains man-witches, Dan looks to an extreme James Bond to save a wounded nation, and Stuart is obsessed with billiards. Wikipedia synopsis for The Last Witch Hunter Movies recommended in this episode: Help Session 9 I Married a Witch

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We discuss The Last Witch Hunter. All other witch hunters presumably having been herded into the sea by the Red Bull. Meanwhile Meanwhile Elliott explains man-witches, Dan looks to an extreme James Bond to save a wounded nation, and Stuart is obsessed with billiards. Wikipedia synopsis for The Last Witch Hunter Movies recommended in this episode: Help Session 9 I Married a Witch

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We discuss The Last Witch Hunter. All other witch hunters presumably having been herded into the sea by the Red Bull. Meanwhile Meanwhile Elliott explains man-witches, Dan looks to an extreme James Bond to save a wounded nation, and Stuart is obsessed with billiards. Wikipedia synopsis for The Last Witch Hunter Movies recommended in this episode: Help Session 9 I Married a Witch

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We discuss The Last Witch Hunter. All other witch hunters presumably having been herded into the sea by the Red Bull. Meanwhile Meanwhile Elliott explains man-witches, Dan looks to an extreme James Bond to save a wounded nation, and Stuart is obsessed with billiards. Wikipedia synopsis for The Last Witch Hunter Movies recommended in this episode: Help Session 9 I Married a Witch

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We have a homecoming to Katherine Heigl (a heiglcoming? no.) with a movie that truly no one remembered existed but Dan, Home Sweet Hell. Meanwhile Stuart gives us his SNL audition, Dan explains the secret origin of Georgian cuisine, and Elliott plays the game show that's sweeping the nation. Wikipedia synopsis for Home Sweet Hell Movies recommended in this episode: Pennies from Heaven Manchester by the Sea Phantasm Wishmaster

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We have a homecoming to Katherine Heigl (a heiglcoming? no.) with a movie that truly no one remembered existed but Dan, Home Sweet Hell. Meanwhile Stuart gives us his SNL audition, Dan explains the secret origin of Georgian cuisine, and Elliott plays the game show that's sweeping the nation. Wikipedia synopsis for Home Sweet Hell Movies recommended in this episode: Pennies from Heaven Manchester by the Sea Phantasm Wishmaster

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We have a homecoming to Katherine Heigl (a heiglcoming? no.) with a movie that truly no one remembered existed but Dan, Home Sweet Hell. Meanwhile Stuart gives us his SNL audition, Dan explains the secret origin of Georgian cuisine, and Elliott plays the game show that's sweeping the nation. Wikipedia synopsis for Home Sweet Hell Movies recommended in this episode: Pennies from Heaven Manchester by the Sea Phantasm Wishmaster

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We have a homecoming to Katherine Heigl (a heiglcoming? no.) with a movie that truly no one remembered existed but Dan, Home Sweet Hell. Meanwhile Stuart gives us his SNL audition, Dan explains the secret origin of Georgian cuisine, and Elliott plays the game show that's sweeping the nation. Wikipedia synopsis for Home Sweet Hell Movies recommended in this episode: Pennies from Heaven Manchester by the Sea Phantasm Wishmaster

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We have a homecoming to Katherine Heigl (a heiglcoming? no.) with a movie that truly no one remembered existed but Dan, Home Sweet Hell. Meanwhile Stuart gives us his SNL audition, Dan explains the secret origin of Georgian cuisine, and Elliott plays the game show that's sweeping the nation. Wikipedia synopsis for Home Sweet Hell Movies recommended in this episode: Pennies from Heaven Manchester by the Sea Phantasm Wishmaster

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This is a big one folks. Batman v. Superman v. The Flop House. Meanwhile Stuart makes it very clear this is not your daddy's anything, Dan does a dead-on Katherine Hepburn, and Elliott reveals how Nicholas Cage rents softcore pornography. Wikipedia synopsis for Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice Movies recommended in this episode: The Gate Fanny and Alexander Moonlight

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This is a big one folks. Batman v. Superman v. The Flop House. Meanwhile Stuart makes it very clear this is not your daddy's anything, Dan does a dead-on Katherine Hepburn, and Elliott reveals how Nicholas Cage rents softcore pornography. Wikipedia synopsis for Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice Movies recommended in this episode: The Gate Fanny and Alexander Moonlight

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This is a big one folks. Batman v. Superman v. The Flop House. Meanwhile Stuart makes it very clear this is not your daddy's anything, Dan does a dead-on Katherine Hepburn, and Elliott reveals how Nicholas Cage rents softcore pornography. Wikipedia synopsis for Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice Movies recommended in this episode: The Gate Fanny and Alexander Moonlight

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This is a big one folks. Batman v. Superman v. The Flop House. Meanwhile Stuart makes it very clear this is not your daddy's anything, Dan does a dead-on Katherine Hepburn, and Elliott reveals how Nicholas Cage rents softcore pornography. Wikipedia synopsis for Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice Movies recommended in this episode: The Gate Fanny and Alexander Moonlight

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This is a big one folks. Batman v. Superman v. The Flop House. Meanwhile Stuart makes it very clear this is not your daddy's anything, Dan does a dead-on Katherine Hepburn, and Elliott reveals how Nicholas Cage rents softcore pornography. Wikipedia synopsis for Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice Movies recommended in this episode: The Gate Fanny and Alexander Moonlight

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Cagemas comes but once a year. Will Saint Nicholas Cage bring us something glorious or another lump of coal for our cinematic stockings? We discuss The Trust. Meanwhile, Stuart reveals his testicle-based library habits, Elliott explores Paul Verhoven's love for California Dreams, and Dan solos on the hot sax. Wikipedia synopsis for The Trust Movies recommended in this episode: Hell or High Water Elle Outcast of the Islands If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE.

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Cagemas comes but once a year. Will Saint Nicholas Cage bring us something glorious or another lump of coal for our cinematic stockings? We discuss The Trust. Meanwhile, Stuart reveals his testicle-based library habits, Elliott explores Paul Verhoven's love for California Dreams, and Dan solos on the hot sax. Wikipedia synopsis for The Trust Movies recommended in this episode: Hell or High Water Elle Outcast of the Islands If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE.

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Cagemas comes but once a year. Will Saint Nicholas Cage bring us something glorious or another lump of coal for our cinematic stockings? We discuss The Trust. Meanwhile, Stuart reveals his testicle-based library habits, Elliott explores Paul Verhoven's love for California Dreams, and Dan solos on the hot sax. Wikipedia synopsis for The Trust Movies recommended in this episode: Hell or High Water Elle Outcast of the Islands If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE.

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Cagemas comes but once a year. Will Saint Nicholas Cage bring us something glorious or another lump of coal for our cinematic stockings? We discuss The Trust. Meanwhile, Stuart reveals his testicle-based library habits, Elliott explores Paul Verhoven's love for California Dreams, and Dan solos on the hot sax. Wikipedia synopsis for The Trust Movies recommended in this episode: Hell or High Water Elle Outcast of the Islands If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE.

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Cagemas comes but once a year. Will Saint Nicholas Cage bring us something glorious or another lump of coal for our cinematic stockings? We discuss The Trust. Meanwhile, Stuart reveals his testicle-based library habits, Elliott explores Paul Verhoven's love for California Dreams, and Dan solos on the hot sax. Wikipedia synopsis for The Trust Movies recommended in this episode: Hell or High Water Elle Outcast of the Islands If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE.

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It's hard to overstate just how barely the Kirk Cameron "materialism-is-good" explainer Saving Christmas qualifies as a movie. Meanwhile, Stuart talks about his gogurt buying habits, Elliott dramatizes Frank Sinatra's sexual habits, and Dan is genuinely disturbed by this movie's theology. Wikipedia synopsis for Saving Christmas Movies recommended in this episode: The Squid and the Whale Arrival Don't Breathe If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE. Flop House Christmas opening theme by John M. Davis and closing theme by Jon Biegen. REMINDER: Alamo Brooklyn LIVE SHOW tickets go on sale MONDAY.

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It's hard to overstate just how barely the Kirk Cameron "materialism-is-good" explainer Saving Christmas qualifies as a movie. Meanwhile, Stuart talks about his gogurt buying habits, Elliott dramatizes Frank Sinatra's sexual habits, and Dan is genuinely disturbed by this movie's theology. Wikipedia synopsis for Saving Christmas Movies recommended in this episode: The Squid and the Whale Arrival Don't Breathe If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE. Flop House Christmas opening theme by John M. Davis and closing theme by Jon Biegen. REMINDER: Alamo Brooklyn LIVE SHOW tickets go on sale MONDAY.

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It's hard to overstate just how barely the Kirk Cameron "materialism-is-good" explainer Saving Christmas qualifies as a movie. Meanwhile, Stuart talks about his gogurt buying habits, Elliott dramatizes Frank Sinatra's sexual habits, and Dan is genuinely disturbed by this movie's theology. Wikipedia synopsis for Saving Christmas Movies recommended in this episode: The Squid and the Whale Arrival Don't Breathe If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE. Flop House Christmas opening theme by John M. Davis and closing theme by Jon Biegen. REMINDER: Alamo Brooklyn LIVE SHOW tickets go on sale MONDAY.

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It's hard to overstate just how barely the Kirk Cameron "materialism-is-good" explainer Saving Christmas qualifies as a movie. Meanwhile, Stuart talks about his gogurt buying habits, Elliott dramatizes Frank Sinatra's sexual habits, and Dan is genuinely disturbed by this movie's theology. Wikipedia synopsis for Saving Christmas Movies recommended in this episode: The Squid and the Whale Arrival Don't Breathe If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE. Flop House Christmas opening theme by John M. Davis and closing theme by Jon Biegen. REMINDER: Alamo Brooklyn LIVE SHOW tickets go on sale MONDAY.

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It's hard to overstate just how barely the Kirk Cameron "materialism-is-good" explainer Saving Christmas qualifies as a movie. Meanwhile, Stuart talks about his gogurt buying habits, Elliott dramatizes Frank Sinatra's sexual habits, and Dan is genuinely disturbed by this movie's theology. Wikipedia synopsis for Saving Christmas Movies recommended in this episode: The Squid and the Whale Arrival Don't Breathe If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE. Flop House Christmas opening theme by John M. Davis and closing theme by Jon Biegen. REMINDER: Alamo Brooklyn LIVE SHOW tickets go on sale MONDAY.

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Kevin Spacey as a cat sounds just purrrrfect (TM) for the Flop House, so we watched Nine Lives. Meanwhile, Stuart tells of his adventures with Kirsten Dunst, Dan suggests a terrible new method of shooting porn, and Elliott tells an offensive phone book joke. Wikipedia synopsis for Nine Lives Movies recommended in this episode: Waxwork II: Lost in Time Losing Ground Encounters at the End of the World If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE. Buy tickets for the FLOP HOUSE LIVE SHOW.

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Kevin Spacey as a cat sounds just purrrrfect (TM) for the Flop House, so we watched Nine Lives. Meanwhile, Stuart tells of his adventures with Kirsten Dunst, Dan suggests a terrible new method of shooting porn, and Elliott tells an offensive phone book joke. Wikipedia synopsis for Nine Lives Movies recommended in this episode: Waxwork II: Lost in Time Losing Ground Encounters at the End of the World If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE. Buy tickets for the FLOP HOUSE LIVE SHOW.

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Kevin Spacey as a cat sounds just purrrrfect (TM) for the Flop House, so we watched Nine Lives. Meanwhile, Stuart tells of his adventures with Kirsten Dunst, Dan suggests a terrible new method of shooting porn, and Elliott tells an offensive phone book joke. Wikipedia synopsis for Nine Lives Movies recommended in this episode: Waxwork II: Lost in Time Losing Ground Encounters at the End of the World If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE. Buy tickets for the FLOP HOUSE LIVE SHOW.

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Kevin Spacey as a cat sounds just purrrrfect (TM) for the Flop House, so we watched Nine Lives. Meanwhile, Stuart tells of his adventures with Kirsten Dunst, Dan suggests a terrible new method of shooting porn, and Elliott tells an offensive phone book joke. Wikipedia synopsis for Nine Lives Movies recommended in this episode: Waxwork II: Lost in Time Losing Ground Encounters at the End of the World If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE. Buy tickets for the FLOP HOUSE LIVE SHOW.

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Kevin Spacey as a cat sounds just purrrrfect (TM) for the Flop House, so we watched Nine Lives. Meanwhile, Stuart tells of his adventures with Kirsten Dunst, Dan suggests a terrible new method of shooting porn, and Elliott tells an offensive phone book joke. Wikipedia synopsis for Nine Lives Movies recommended in this episode: Waxwork II: Lost in Time Losing Ground Encounters at the End of the World If you would like to contribute to the Flop House Facebook charity drive for Planned Parenthood, GO HERE. Buy tickets for the FLOP HOUSE LIVE SHOW.

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Back to our non-Shocktober fare as we mourn election day with our Independence Day: Resurgence discussion. Meanwhile, Elliott gives the JD Power porn star awards, Stuart's weenus is protected, and Dan cannot leave President Sex Criminal alone. Wikipedia synopsis for Independence Day: Resurgence Movies recommended in this episode: Doctor Strange Dog Soldiers No End A Little Romance

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Back to our non-Shocktober fare as we mourn election day with our Independence Day: Resurgence discussion. Meanwhile, Elliott gives the JD Power porn star awards, Stuart's weenus is protected, and Dan cannot leave President Sex Criminal alone. Wikipedia synopsis for Independence Day: Resurgence Movies recommended in this episode: Doctor Strange Dog Soldiers No End A Little Romance

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Back to our non-Shocktober fare as we mourn election day with our Independence Day: Resurgence discussion. Meanwhile, Elliott gives the JD Power porn star awards, Stuart's weenus is protected, and Dan cannot leave President Sex Criminal alone. Wikipedia synopsis for Independence Day: Resurgence Movies recommended in this episode: Doctor Strange Dog Soldiers No End A Little Romance

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Back to our non-Shocktober fare as we mourn election day with our Independence Day: Resurgence discussion. Meanwhile, Elliott gives the JD Power porn star awards, Stuart's weenus is protected, and Dan cannot leave President Sex Criminal alone. Wikipedia synopsis for Independence Day: Resurgence Movies recommended in this episode: Doctor Strange Dog Soldiers No End A Little Romance

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Back to our non-Shocktober fare as we mourn election day with our Independence Day: Resurgence discussion. Meanwhile, Elliott gives the JD Power porn star awards, Stuart's weenus is protected, and Dan cannot leave President Sex Criminal alone. Wikipedia synopsis for Independence Day: Resurgence Movies recommended in this episode: Doctor Strange Dog Soldiers No End A Little Romance

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On this final SHOCKTOBER episode we discuss the noose-is-loose would-be chiller The Gallows. Meanwhile, Elliott somehow weasels his way out of doing a Muppet voice, Stuart reveals Dick Tracy's bias against the disabled, and Dan somehow doesn't let the movie's plotting make his head explode. Wikipedia synopsis for The Gallows Movies recommended in this episode: The Handmaiden Hunt for the Wilderpeople Lemora: A Child's Tale of the Supernatural

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On this final SHOCKTOBER episode we discuss the noose-is-loose would-be chiller The Gallows. Meanwhile, Elliott somehow weasels his way out of doing a Muppet voice, Stuart reveals Dick Tracy's bias against the disabled, and Dan somehow doesn't let the movie's plotting make his head explode. Wikipedia synopsis for The Gallows Movies recommended in this episode: The Handmaiden Hunt for the Wilderpeople Lemora: A Child's Tale of the Supernatural

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On this final SHOCKTOBER episode we discuss the noose-is-loose would-be chiller The Gallows. Meanwhile, Elliott somehow weasels his way out of doing a Muppet voice, Stuart reveals Dick Tracy's bias against the disabled, and Dan somehow doesn't let the movie's plotting make his head explode. Wikipedia synopsis for The Gallows Movies recommended in this episode: The Handmaiden Hunt for the Wilderpeople Lemora: A Child's Tale of the Supernatural

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On this final SHOCKTOBER episode we discuss the noose-is-loose would-be chiller The Gallows. Meanwhile, Elliott somehow weasels his way out of doing a Muppet voice, Stuart reveals Dick Tracy's bias against the disabled, and Dan somehow doesn't let the movie's plotting make his head explode. Wikipedia synopsis for The Gallows Movies recommended in this episode: The Handmaiden Hunt for the Wilderpeople Lemora: A Child's Tale of the Supernatural

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On this final SHOCKTOBER episode we discuss the noose-is-loose would-be chiller The Gallows. Meanwhile, Elliott somehow weasels his way out of doing a Muppet voice, Stuart reveals Dick Tracy's bias against the disabled, and Dan somehow doesn't let the movie's plotting make his head explode. Wikipedia synopsis for The Gallows Movies recommended in this episode: The Handmaiden Hunt for the Wilderpeople Lemora: A Child's Tale of the Supernatural

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Shocktober continues! On this episode we discuss the Flatliners-esque Lazarus Effect. More specific shownotes canceled on account of Dan's sick. Wikipedia synopsis for The Lazarus Effect Movies recommended in this episode: Viy Pet Sematary The Shallows Shin Godzilla

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BOOOGENS! Shocktober begins with Victor Frankenstein, the movie that posits that maybe we don't actually wanna see the monster that much. Meanwhile, Elliott disrespects the death of several major pop artists, Stu brings up Jackie Chan again, and Dan says some weird things about ears and hot dogs. Wikipedia synopsis for Victor Frankenstein. Movies recommended in this episode: Mr. Right The Howling The Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean

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Smalltember/vember continues! On this episode we discuss the feature length ad for a dating website and for God, Christian Mingle. and Stuart explains how to find cartoon porn, Dan checks his website privilege, and Elliott "Weekend at Bernies"es someone very close to him. Wikipedia synopsis for Christian Mingle. Movies recommended in this episode: Mustang The Duke of Burgundy Hard Target 2

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Smalltember/vember begins with a movie none of us had heard of until a couple of Canadian listeners pressed a blu-ray into our hot little hands: No Deposit. Meanwhile Elliott reveals Ringo Starr's adventures in New Jersey, Stuart sends a giant child straight to the circus, and Dan delivers a line that should NOT be taken out of context. NO WIKIPEDIA SYNOPSIS for No Deposit. So here's a page for Frank D'Angelo. Movies recommended in this episode: Demolition Man A Midsummer Night's Dream Pather Panchali

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At the request of charity contest winner Erik North, we discuss the classic (?) 1998 version of Godzilla. Meanwhile Dan tries to explain Dangerous Liaisons, Elliott surprises no one by reading a Godzilla-centered magazine, and Stuart gives you some advice about how to get milk. Wikipedia synopsis for Godzilla. Movies recommended in this episode: Tickled Hitchcock/Truffaut Everybody Wants Some! Harlan County U.S.A. MAXFUN MEETUP at HINTERLANDS.

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Kept in the Flop House Vaults until now, and released because we're on the road in D.C., it's the LIVE Fantastic Four show!   Visit STUART’S BAR, HINTERLANDS.

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Zhubin Parang joins us for the fourth most magical time on the Flop House calandar: Cagemas in July! It's also time for the political conventions, so more extensive show notes are canceled while Dan jets off to Cleveland and Philly.

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We just can't stop punishing ourselves with bizarre kids' computer animated films. Will Norm of the North be another Guardian of the Highlands or Foodfight!? Meanwhile Stuart has strong feelings on Tyrion Lannister's political positions, Elliott mangles Sinatra, and Dan is far too distracted by his loud cat. Wikipedia synopsis for Norm of the North. Movies recommended in this episode Shallow Grave Lifeboat Sleeping with Other People Get tickets for our LIVE SHOW in D.C. in August! Visit STUART’S BAR, HINTERLANDS.

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Elliott is back from his brief sabbatical. Will the possible evil-doll-antics of The Boy make him regret it? Meanwhile Stuart makes people's days better with a choking hazard, Dan's bachelor lifestyle is depressing, and Elliott shares why he has the cleanest poop in town. Wikipedia synopsis for The Boy. Movies recommended in this episode Mistress America De Palma The Face of Another Fright Night

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Hallie rejoins us, while Elliott is briefly away, to determine whether any tears were jerked by the Nicholas Sparks tearjerker, The Choice. Meanwhile Stuart reveals the Hamburglar's m-o, Dan discusses the strange things he's slept on, and Hallie explains the romantic troubles of dating someone on the metric system. Movies recommended in this episode Mr. Arkadin Entertainment Cross of Iron

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Live from Cake Shop as part of NYC Podfest. It's Gods of Egypt.

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On this episode we discuss the should-be-more-hateable tale of young aspiring DJ douches We Are Your Friends. Meanwhile, Elliott describes a Golden Girls party at length, Stuart burns Broadway, and Dan slowly dies. Apologies for the wonky audio. Due to his cold, Dan may have made a recording mistake with the microphones. Movies recommended in this episode: In the Blood Krampus Captain America: Civil War The 13th Warrior Portrait of Jason

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This episode is part three in a podcrawl with the guys at Read it and Weep, and at Too Beautiful to Live, covering the entire Look Who's Talking trilogy. We got to handle the thrilling conclusion, Look Who's Talking Now. Meanwhile we discover what's in the file titled "Things Stuart Knows," Dan reveals his shameful Simpsons past, and Elliott pitches "Fiddler on the Wolf Goes West." Movies recommended in this episode: Ricki and the Flash The Invitation China 9, Liberty 37

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On this episode we run through a tasting menu of Bradley Cooper's assholish behavior in the bad-boy chef movie, Burnt. Meanwhile, Elliott recites some lewd Dr. Seuss, Stuart drops some Friday the 13th science, and Dan suggests a new sort of nativity. Movies recommended in this episode: His Girl FridayMcCabe and Mrs. Miller The Tin Drum

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Shocktober continues! On this episode we discuss the Flatliners-esque Lazarus Effect. More specific shownotes canceled on account of Dan's sick. Wikipedia synopsis for The Lazarus Effect Movies recommended in this episode: Viy Pet Sematary The Shallows Shin Godzilla

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BOOOGENS! Shocktober begins with Victor Frankenstein, the movie that posits that maybe we don't actually wanna see the monster that much. Meanwhile, Elliott disrespects the death of several major pop artists, Stu brings up Jackie Chan again, and Dan says some weird things about ears and hot dogs. Wikipedia synopsis for Victor Frankenstein. Movies recommended in this episode: Mr. Right The Howling The Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean

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Smalltember/vember continues! On this episode we discuss the feature length ad for a dating website and for God, Christian Mingle. and Stuart explains how to find cartoon porn, Dan checks his website privilege, and Elliott "Weekend at Bernies"es someone very close to him. Wikipedia synopsis for Christian Mingle. Movies recommended in this episode: Mustang The Duke of Burgundy Hard Target 2

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Smalltember/vember begins with a movie none of us had heard of until a couple of Canadian listeners pressed a blu-ray into our hot little hands: No Deposit. Meanwhile Elliott reveals Ringo Starr's adventures in New Jersey, Stuart sends a giant child straight to the circus, and Dan delivers a line that should NOT be taken out of context. NO WIKIPEDIA SYNOPSIS for No Deposit. So here's a page for Frank D'Angelo. Movies recommended in this episode: Demolition Man A Midsummer Night's Dream Pather Panchali

View Details

At the request of charity contest winner Erik North, we discuss the classic (?) 1998 version of Godzilla. Meanwhile Dan tries to explain Dangerous Liaisons, Elliott surprises no one by reading a Godzilla-centered magazine, and Stuart gives you some advice about how to get milk. Wikipedia synopsis for Godzilla. Movies recommended in this episode: Tickled Hitchcock/Truffaut Everybody Wants Some! Harlan County U.S.A. MAXFUN MEETUP at HINTERLANDS.

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Kept in the Flop House Vaults until now, and released because we're on the road in D.C., it's the LIVE Fantastic Four show!   Visit STUART’S BAR, HINTERLANDS.

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Zhubin Parang joins us for the fourth most magical time on the Flop House calandar: Cagemas in July! It's also time for the political conventions, so more extensive show notes are canceled while Dan jets off to Cleveland and Philly.

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We just can't stop punishing ourselves with bizarre kids' computer animated films. Will Norm of the North be another Guardian of the Highlands or Foodfight!? Meanwhile Stuart has strong feelings on Tyrion Lannister's political positions, Elliott mangles Sinatra, and Dan is far too distracted by his loud cat. Wikipedia synopsis for Norm of the North. Movies recommended in this episode Shallow Grave Lifeboat Sleeping with Other People Get tickets for our LIVE SHOW in D.C. in August! Visit STUART’S BAR, HINTERLANDS.

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Elliott is back from his brief sabbatical. Will the possible evil-doll-antics of The Boy make him regret it? Meanwhile Stuart makes people's days better with a choking hazard, Dan's bachelor lifestyle is depressing, and Elliott shares why he has the cleanest poop in town. Wikipedia synopsis for The Boy. Movies recommended in this episode Mistress America De Palma The Face of Another Fright Night

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Hallie rejoins us, while Elliott is briefly away, to determine whether any tears were jerked by the Nicholas Sparks tearjerker, The Choice. Meanwhile Stuart reveals the Hamburglar's m-o, Dan discusses the strange things he's slept on, and Hallie explains the romantic troubles of dating someone on the metric system. Movies recommended in this episode Mr. Arkadin Entertainment Cross of Iron

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Live from Cake Shop as part of NYC Podfest. It's Gods of Egypt.

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On this episode we discuss the should-be-more-hateable tale of young aspiring DJ douches We Are Your Friends. Meanwhile, Elliott describes a Golden Girls party at length, Stuart burns Broadway, and Dan slowly dies. Apologies for the wonky audio. Due to his cold, Dan may have made a recording mistake with the microphones. Movies recommended in this episode: In the Blood Krampus Captain America: Civil War The 13th Warrior Portrait of Jason

View Details

On this episode we run through a tasting menu of Bradley Cooper's assholish behavior in the bad-boy chef movie, Burnt. Meanwhile, Elliott recites some lewd Dr. Seuss, Stuart drops some Friday the 13th science, and Dan suggests a new sort of nativity. Movies recommended in this episode: His Girl FridayMcCabe and Mrs. Miller The Tin Drum

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With the glamour and horror of our 200th/MaxFun Drive episode behind us, we return to meat-and-potatoes flophousery with the little seen sci-fi actioner Vice, starring Flop House repeat offenders Thomas Jane and Bruce Willis. Meanwhile, Elliott explains the risks of marrying Shannon Tweed, Dan takes a fantasy trip to the set of the sitcom Wings, and Stuart makes a shocking leap ahead in Radio Zork Movies recommended in this episode: Green Room10 Cloverfield LaneThe Forbidden Room

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It's the moment we promised would never happen: we watched Elliott and Dan's stated least-favorite movie of all time, Nothing but Trouble. (Don't worry - despite Elliott's joking claim that if we ever did this film it would be our last, this is NOT our final episode). And to help us out with this special MAX FUN DRIVE episode (donate!), we welcome self-proclaimed minor television celebrity, Mr. John Hodgman. Meanwhile, Elliott breaks out his "Jane Campion accent, Stuart reveals his popcorn secrets, And Hodgman joins in at making fun of Dan's pronunciation. Movies recommended in this episode: The StingWitchtrapBroadcast NewsThe Housemaid

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Just in time for MaxFun Drive, a little bonus for listeners.

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Don't worry -- we took your boring story about a magical rock-star-making computer and turned it into a thrilling story about YouTube. We talk Jem and the Holograms. Meanwhile, Elliott has a surprisingly deep knowledge of failed Internet concerns, Stuart reveals the hidden bonds between Seal and Salman Rushdie, and Dan is totally blazed. Movies recommended in this episode: Slow WestMiller's CrossingCria Cuervos

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It's the Jewish magical realism tale that almost made Elliott hate his own Judaism: The Cobbler. Meanwhile, Stuart suffers from cartoon eye degeneration, Dan would like you to know very much that he's a wealthy murderer, and Elliott's singing has started to  bleed dangerously outside the letters section. Movies recommended in this episode: The Deer Hunter The Witch Chi-Raq

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Is Seventh Son seventh fun? Perhaps, though we're not sure what "seventh fun" means. Meanwhile, Elliott pitches us on FXXX, Stuart expresses his love for fantasy bullshit maps, and Dan feels terrible about mixing up En Vogue and TLC. We also debut Jonathan Biegen's "That's How it Works (feat. The Flop House)." And a warning for sensitive listeners -- we briefly get serious during the letters section with some talk about suicide. Movies recommended in this episode: Close RangeDiary of a Teenage GirlMiddle of Nowhere

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Will Cameron Crowe ever rebound from his Elizabethtown slump? Probably not with the even-worse Aloha. Meanwhile, Dan calls out famed painter Leonardo Da Vinci, Elliott can't remember the rich Bazooka Joe cast of characters, and Stu engages in something that's definitely a bit. Movies recommended in this episode: It's Such a Beautiful DaySicarioClass of 1984

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If you're a new listener, here's a good place to start!

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It's a super-sized, super-fun, super-technical-glitch-filled CONTEST WINNER SELECTION EPISODE! Tom Horstmann requested that we watch the 1986's The Golden Child, AKA "Don't worry about rewriting the screenplay; Eddie Murphy can improvise any action movie into a comedy!" Meanwhile Stuart uncovers the racist motives of the BK Kids Club, Elliott takes down beloved dead comedian Bill Hicks, and Dan advocates the Morvern style of menswear. Movies recommended in this episode: Man UpThe Hateful EightComing to America

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For this year's Cagemas we honor both the kindly St. Nicholas Cage, and Star Wars by picking the Cage-Hayden Christiansen joint, Outcast. Meanwhile, Stuart does an ad for Clearasil, Elliott contributes his worst Popeye, and, yet again, Stu and Elliott interrupt Dan when he's trying to do something nice for other people. Merry Cagemas. Special Cagemas and Cagenuka themes courtesy of Jonathan Biegen. Movies recommended in this episode: The Big Short Magic Mike XXL Bone Tomahawk

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On this episode we uncharacteristically talk sports, specifically futbol, as we watched the definitely-not-about-a-corrupt-organization FIFA film, United Passions. And who better to join us as we wade into these unfamiliar waters than sports expert and Flop House nemesis, David Kalan.  Elliott introduces us to the American Bean Council mascot, Stuart coins an all-new word, Dan instructs you on sportsball Fisher Stevens cosplay, and David tells us a fascinating story about Executive Decision. Movies recommended in this episode: Shaolin SoccerSteve JobsThe Battered Bastards of BaseballBeasts of No NationSicarioBeau Geste

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Remember when Chappie fever swept the country, with all those pet Chappies, and tickle-me-Chappies? Meanwhile, Elliott describes a literary-technique-based dystopian future, Stuart continues to explain the Internet, and Dan just checks out for a while. Like, he totally doesn't talk for seven minutes or something. Sorry, it was a long week. Movies recommended in this episode: Dead or AliveDrunk, Stoned, Brilliant, DeadWifePremonition Following an Evil Deed

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Think you're too good for the Oxford comma, Men, Women & Children? WELL WE'RE TOO GOOD FOR YOU. Meanwhile Stu explains "X-Men nudity," Dan makes a call for an annotated Flop House, and Elliott explains the music your kids' kids are gonna love. Oh, and also there's a BIG ANNOUNCEMENT. Movies recommended in this episode: SpectreGrandmaThe Ipcress FileRazorback

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Every Shocktober must come, sadly, to an end, but not without our longest (and best?) episode of the month. Dan Macabre, Booart Skellington, and Elliott Killin' are joined by Hellie Haglund to discuss "Ouija," the movie that captures the thrill of moving a piece of wood across a board. Meanwhile Stuart discovers the double-meaning to House II, Dan expands his masterful celebrity impression repertoire, which turns the tables on interrupting Elliott, and Hallie insists that Ingmar Bergman was a breast man.Movies recommended in this episode:SecondsCreepMy Best FiendGinza CosmeticsThanks for all the inquiries about the health of Lulu, Dan's cat. Unfortunately, he and Sarah had to put her to sleep after 12 love-filled years. Her suffering is over, and now she's sniffing Hallie's boots in heaven. We miss her.

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No show notes because Dan is busy nursing a sick cat.

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As part of the MaxFun Great Switcheroo, Justin, Travis, Griffin, and Merle McElroy of The Adventure Zone have taken on Leprechaun: Origins. Meanwhile, if you want to hear the Original Peaches (plus guest star Zhubin Parang) you can find them playing D&D over at The Adventure Zone!

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It's the most magical time of the year! SHOCKTOBER! And this year we're kicking off with the millenials-on-a-computer-screen shocker "Unfriended." Meanwhile, Dan reads movie ad copy, Elliott talks Quidditch injuries, and Stuart reveals his poop fears.Movies recommended in this episode:The VisitThe Leopard ManThe Late Show

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No show notes on account of Emmys.

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No show notes this week.

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Straight from Cannes to Lifetime (TM), it's the Grace Kelly biopic, Grace of Monaco. Meanwhile Elliott has a surprisingly deep well of Saved by the Bell knowledge, Dan speculates about Curly's gold, and Stuart finds a new way to leave Dan out of things.Movies recommended in this episode:The DropProject NimObvious Child

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Take two faded stars, put them in an Aussie C-picture, and encourage them to improvise wildly, and what do you get? The oddly compelling Drive Hard. Meanwhile Elliott improves various movies by adding a little vitamin C(age), Dan reveals what the H.P. in H.P. Lovecraft stands for, and Stuart almost gets Billy Joel lyrics right.Movies recommended in this episode:My Brilliant CareerBreaker MorantThe Dirty DozenThe Interview (1998)

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Some of the top bits and tangents from the first 75 episodes, suggested by fans. Apologies for the sound quality on some of these -- it was early on and we were learning.

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Show notes canceled on account of SUMMER.

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In this episode, Jordan Morris of terrific MaxFun sister podcast Jordan, Jesse, Go! stops by to co-host while Elliott's in England, a move he immediately regretted when we watched Strange Magic. Meanwhile, Dan explains the proper way to drink beer, Stuart evinces his disdain for improv, and Jordan displays his surprisingly deep knowledge of Three Ninjas. Movies recommended in this episode:The Super CopsThe OvernightResults

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Will the guys who liked Speed Racer also enjoy the Wachowski sibling's most recent critical flop, Jupiter Ascending? Meanwhile Elliott debuts his new bumper sticker, Dan boringly digresses about The Three Investigators, and Stuart explains why, when incarcerating someone, you should really take their rocket boots.Movies recommended in this episode:CreepFlash GordonBarbarellaThe Visitor

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Detailed show notes abandoned this week, as Dan and Elliott are winging their way to Montreal for a wedding!

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Hoo boy does Johnny Depp certainly have a mustache in Mortdcai!  Meanwhile Dan reads copy off a beer for some reason, Elliott invites George Lucas to stop by, and Stuart recommends a surprising film.Movies recommended in this episode:Mad Max: Fury RoadNeed for SpeedStuart Wellington mystery recommendation

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In the words of Homer Simpson, we've got a hankerin' for some spankerin', as we discuss 50 Shades of Grey.  Meanwhile Stuart delivers a eulogy for the rappin' granny, Elliott explains the laziness of British elocution, Dan reveals a porn tale from his past, and we include perhaps our best outtakes ever.Movies recommended in this episode:What We Do in the ShadowsLucyDownhill Racer

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We've seen him 3D, but are we ready for Dracula: Untold? Meanwhile Stuart demonstrates his innovative mixology, and Elliot and Dan reveal the surprising Dracula-centric details of the Mad Men finale.Movies recommended in this episode:Donnie BrascoSpringDracula: Pages from a Virgin's Diary

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It's the moment that the bad movie cognoscenti have been waiting for, as we discuss The Boy Next Door. Meanwhile, Stuart explains the "character" he plays, Dan becomes a proponent of the female gaze, and Elliott describes some of the lesser-known sexually explicit Disney cartoons of the 60's.Movies recommended in this episode:CitizenfourFaultsIt Follows

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We return to the "romantic fantasy" genre that served us so well (?) with Upside Down as we discuss the Colin Farrell vehicle, Winter's Tale. Meanwhile, Dan explains Aerosmith's magic powers, Elliott implores a horse to help him make his booty call, and Stuart wonders whether he was the one in Spaceballs. Movies recommended in this episode:Run All NightIt FollowsLove Affair, or the Case of the Missing Switchboard Operator

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It's the MaxFun drive! And, though Stu is in Puerto Rico, we pulled out the big guns with a return appearance by Hallie Haglund! She adds some much needed perspective to the asshole-dude-based RomCommery of That Awkward Moment. Meanwhile Elliott reveals his hatred of smooth men who have a lot of sex, Dan is, yet again, accused of racism, and Hallie can't get over the similarity between our lead actress and farts.Movies recommended in this episode:Cold in JulyAll Good ThingsMan is Not a Bird

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Turns out that being Christopher Nolan's cinematographer is not the same thing as being Christopher Nolan, as we found out when we endured Transcendence. Meanwhile Elliott explains Dan's unusual way of reading, Stuart has a Transmorphers flashback, and Dan sings a little cow opera. Movies recommended in this episode:The Evil ClergymanThe Woman on the BeachSunshine

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There's just something about a terrible kids' movie that brings out the best (?) in us, so we dive headfirst into the CGI flop Legends of OZ: Dorothy's Return. Meanwhile, Stuart gives important advice to our kidnapped listeners, Dan inadvertently pitches the new hit movie "Uncatchable," and Bizzarro Elliott makes an appearance. Movies and TV recommended in this episode: SorcererWildLogan's Run

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Flop House repeat offender Idris Elba romances Taraji P. Henson in the Valentine's Day favorite No Good Deed. Wait, did we say "romances?" We meant "terrorizes." Meanwhile Elliott tells us of James Bond films of the future, Dan tries to play a game of Radio Zork, and Stuart introduces the new Sweet Amazing Candy Penis.Movies recommended in this episode:RomaHappy ChristmasCoherence

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We will never watch anything with nearly three hour bloat again, so enjoy the special snowflake that is us talking about the most recent Bayhem, Transformers: Age of Extinction. Meanwhile, Elliott explains how to find a Transformer's clitoris, Stuart keeps on Castle Freakin' on, and sleepy Dan (sort of) returns.Movies recommended in this episode:Winter LightZRock N Roll Nightmare

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Recorded on 1/9/2015 in front of a live, sold out crowd in The Bell House in Gowanus, Brooklyn. A huge thanks to Mr. Matt Carman (1/2 of the excellent zine "I Love Bad Movies") for recording the show and making sure we sound as good as we do.

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Merry Cagemas everyone! The store was all out of Left Behind (well... it hasn't been released to video or streaming yet), so we got you a Rage. We hope you're not too disappointed. Meanwhile Elliott reads the Looney Tunes dinner specials, Dan reveals the medical source of his word-slurring, and Stuart just can't stop chewing. Movies recommended in this episode:NightcrawlerFoxcatcherFor a Few Dollars More9 Deaths of the Ninja

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Song of the autumn contest winner Jason MacIssac decreed that we should be subjected to legendary season-one-of-American-Idol ancillary flop From Justin to Kelly. Did he take it easy on us, or is there now a bounty on his head? Meanwhile Stuart introduces his innovative new restaurant concept, and Elliott murders Dan on air.  Movies recommended in this episode:Inherent ViceThe Hobbit: Battle of the Five ArmiesNine Days of One Year

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A returning Flop House director guides a cast of returning Flop House stars in an eruption of mediocrity named Pompeii. Meanwhile Stu asks a provocative question about Cenobites, Elliott reveals an early draft of a Robert Louis Stevenson classic, and Dan debuts his new hit character. Movies recommended in this episode:VolcanoHouseboundThe HurricaneThe Chant of Jimmie Blacksmith

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Detailed show notes canceled on account of Dan being sick with Mongolian death flu. Movies recommended in this episode:The Woman ChaserShort Term 12Phase IVJohn Wick

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Thus  we enter November, the month known for having "No" theme. And, appropriately, we watched one of the most generic of modern action sequels, 300: Rise of an Empire. Meanwhile, Elliott lectures on Noid avoidance, Dan makes a public apology relating to one type of music and attacks another, and Stu makes an exciting announcement for enjoyers of comical books.

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Shocktober continues/ends with Dario Argento totally forgetting everything he knew about filmmaking (and we don't even like him that much) with Dracula 3D. Meanwhile, Dan reveals the alternate, director's cut ending to Escape (The Pina Colada Song), Elliott out-pervs the pervazoid with his demands for more nudity, and Stuart once again astounds with his facility for accents. Movies recommended in this episode:Shadow of the VampireDuelThe Hitcher

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BOOOOOGENS! Welcome to the first episode of SHOCKTOBER 2014 (and the first episode officially under our new podcast network, MaxFun). And because we would never Halloween trick you, instead we're treating you to a guest appearance by Hallie Haglund, sitting in with the OP's, to discuss The Quiet Ones. Meanwhile, Elliott lists all the great MaxFun podcasts, Stuart once again shows his ignorance of all things Internet, and Hallie puts Dan in his place. Movies and TV recommended in this episode: From BeyondThe ReturnedWitchboardThe Hidden

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Smalltember continues with perhaps the smallest movie we've ever covered, the bad movie new classic "A Talking Cat!?!" Meanwhile Stuart entertains the lizard representative of Harlem, Elliott gives helpful mnemonic devices for the major German directors, and Dan does some research into the pervy past of the movie's creative team. Movies recommended in this episode:Intimate LightingThe GuestEnemy

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The OP's are all back in action, celebrating the all-NEW made-up holiday of "Smallvember." First up, the Christsploitation film "God's Not Dead" filled with the straw-manniest straw men outside of a county fair.  Meanwhile Elliott and Detective Columbo disprove the flat Earth theory, Stuart reveals a surprising knowledge of the Christian rock genre, and Dan announces a new contest! Movies recommended in this episode:Jodorowsky's DuneThe Last of SheilaThe One I Love

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Thanks to his series of enraged tweets on the matter, we invited comedy writer and pop culture expert Kevin Maher on the show to discuss the enragingly anthropomorphized Walking with Dinosaurs. Meanwhile Dan pervazoids up the Crypt Keeper, Kevin unleashes his dad rage, and Stuart yet again shows his understanding of America's youth.Movies recommended in this episode:Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007)Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (1982)Into the Woods (American Playhouse, 1991)Drinking BuddiesCloudy with a Chance of Meatballs

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No movie has sexualized pastry so much since American Pie, yet somehow Labor Day is even less erotic than Jason Biggs balls-deep in apple filling. Meanwhile Stuart does some brilliant voice work, Dan loves the versatility of DVDs, and Elliott regales the world with Tales of Ruck.Movies recommended in this episode:The Crazies (1973)The Crazies (2010)Edge of TomorrowAlan Partridge

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With audiences primed to be disappointed by a new Hercules movie in theaters, why not be like the Peaches and be disappointed by The Legend of Hercules in the comfort of your own home. Meanwhile Elliott tells us the secrets of the ancient Greek hamburger, Dan has uncanny recall for old Disney cartoons, and Stuart tells sad tales of British totty.Movies recommended in this episode:SnowpiercerThe Lego MovieThe Hunger Games: Catching Fire12 Years a SlaveMuppets Most Wanted Jack Ryan: Shadow RecruitDogtoothZ

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Shocktober continues! On this episode we discuss the Flatliners-esque Lazarus Effect. More specific shownotes canceled on account of Dan's sick. Wikipedia synopsis for The Lazarus Effect Movies recommended in this episode: Viy Pet Sematary The Shallows Shin Godzilla

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Producer Luc Besson and director McG made a bet about the number of tones they could cram into 3 Days to Kill, and the audience lost. Meanwhile Elliott does his classic "2000 Year-Old Killer" routine, Dan gets more inappropriately sexual than ever before, Stu introduces the concept of a "neck baby," and TVs Jessica Williams stops by, because why the heck not?Movies recommended in this episode:The LimeyThey Came TogetherObvious ChildThe Sea Wolf

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We discuss Last Vegas, which is, of course, a documentary from the far future about the time the elderly Original Peaches and friend went to Las Vegas. Meanwhile Dan unveils his totally original, copyrighted concept, Elliott reveals how he does creep research, and Stu pulls out a letters surprise.Movies recommended in this episode:Stop Making SenseLolaStakeland

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BOOOGENS! Shocktober begins with Victor Frankenstein, the movie that posits that maybe we don't actually wanna see the monster that much. Meanwhile, Elliott disrespects the death of several major pop artists, Stu brings up Jackie Chan again, and Dan says some weird things about ears and hot dogs. Wikipedia synopsis for Victor Frankenstein. Movies recommended in this episode: Mr. Right The Howling The Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean

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Yes, Elliott, it should be called I, Frankenstein's Monster, but that doesn't change the fact that we watched I, Frankenstein. Meanwhile Elliott reveals the secret sex fetishes of Archie Comics characters, we learn Stuart's nicknames, and Dan asks the big metaphysical questions.Movies recommended in this episode:The GrannyThe Wages of FearDeceptive Practice: The Mysteries and Mentors of Ricky JayWhat's the Matter With Helen?

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Smalltember/vember continues! On this episode we discuss the feature length ad for a dating website and for God, Christian Mingle. and Stuart explains how to find cartoon porn, Dan checks his website privilege, and Elliott "Weekend at Bernies"es someone very close to him. Wikipedia synopsis for Christian Mingle. Movies recommended in this episode: Mustang The Duke of Burgundy Hard Target 2

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Despite being one of the more nothing movies we've ever watched, we somehow crap out what we believe to be our longest episode with G.I. Joe: Retaliation. It's a living. Meanwhile, Dan and Elliott explain what "G.I. Joe" means, and develop President Ziggy, and Stuart reveals he's an evil land developer.Movies recommended in this episode:Raising CainVideodromeDeath Rides a Horse

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Smalltember/vember begins with a movie none of us had heard of until a couple of Canadian listeners pressed a blu-ray into our hot little hands: No Deposit. Meanwhile Elliott reveals Ringo Starr's adventures in New Jersey, Stuart sends a giant child straight to the circus, and Dan delivers a line that should NOT be taken out of context. NO WIKIPEDIA SYNOPSIS for No Deposit. So here's a page for Frank D'Angelo. Movies recommended in this episode: Demolition Man A Midsummer Night's Dream Pather Panchali

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We discuss Easy Rider: The Ride Back, an object lesson in why you should never let a movie's sequel rights lapse. Meanwhile Dan explains the Flop House fan caste system, Elliott puts the "bar" in barter, and Stuart knows nothing about robots.Movies recommended in this episode:Blade IIThe EastMy Dinner With Andre

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1980 was a simpler time, when you could put Clint Eastwood together with an orangutan, not bother to come up with a story, and release it as a major motion picture called Any Which Way but Loose (check out We Hate Movies doing the first film in the "Clint goes ape" series, Every Which Way but Loose HERE). Meanwhile Dan runs through several impeccable celebrity impressions, Elliott explains a rare sex act, and Stu discusses what orangutans did to get orangutan news before Google alerts.Movies recommended in this episode:Blue RuinI Saw the DevilShock Corridor

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At the request of charity contest winner Erik North, we discuss the classic (?) 1998 version of Godzilla. Meanwhile Dan tries to explain Dangerous Liaisons, Elliott surprises no one by reading a Godzilla-centered magazine, and Stuart gives you some advice about how to get milk. Wikipedia synopsis for Godzilla. Movies recommended in this episode: Tickled Hitchcock/Truffaut Everybody Wants Some! Harlan County U.S.A. MAXFUN MEETUP at HINTERLANDS.

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Hey remember those DeNiro and Stallone boxing movies you loved? This is also... a movie. We talk about Grudge Match, the movie that pretends DeNiro has a chance against steroidal Stallone. Meanwhile Dan discusses Kevin Hart's need to do only Kevin-branded movies, Elliott uncovers Sean Connery's strange belief he's in every movie, and one of Stu's relatives makes an unexpected appearance. Movies recommended in this episode:The Set-UpUnder the SkinThe Raid 2

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Han Solo vs. Commissioner Gordon sounds awesome, until you realize the star of Paranoia is actually a Hemsworth brother. And not the good one. Meanwhile Elliott doubles down on the size of Gary Oldman's penis, Stuart disturbs us by talking about intimate times and Dan introduces the notion of a California Raisins fetish. A note: in this episode Dan confuses Baba Yaga with Strega Nona. Movies recommended in this episode:The Grand Budapest HotelThe VisitorThe Sweet Smell of Success

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Kept in the Flop House Vaults until now, and released because we're on the road in D.C., it's the LIVE Fantastic Four show!   Visit STUART’S BAR, HINTERLANDS.

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Uh, one question, boss: Doesn't Gangster Squad kind of sound like WE'RE the Gangsters?We return to a big, old-fashioned Hollywood flop with Gangster Squad, the movie that takes a bunch of good actors and a promising director and churns out a film thats absurd and deadly dull by turns. Meanwhile Elliott gives Hoagie Carmichael gift advice, Stuart comes out for cast awareness, and Dan is tired and really doesn't keep up his end of the co-hosting duties. This episode brought to you by the letter "H."Movies recommended in this episode:The Roaring TwentiesThe Friends of Eddie CoyleManhunterGrand Piano

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Zhubin Parang joins us for the fourth most magical time on the Flop House calandar: Cagemas in July! It's also time for the political conventions, so more extensive show notes are canceled while Dan jets off to Cleveland and Philly.

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The solution to "Devil's Kidney Stone." In which Dan makes the mistake of thinking that, because Renny Harlin directed Devil's Pass, it would be crazy and weird, rather than draggy and significantly more boring than reading the Wikipedia page about the real Dyatlov Pass incident. Then, we forgo letters and recommendations to offer a condensed version of our usual Awards Floptacular, because no one (including us) really cared much about the Awards Floptacular anyway.

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We just can't stop punishing ourselves with bizarre kids' computer animated films. Will Norm of the North be another Guardian of the Highlands or Foodfight!? Meanwhile Stuart has strong feelings on Tyrion Lannister's political positions, Elliott mangles Sinatra, and Dan is far too distracted by his loud cat. Wikipedia synopsis for Norm of the North. Movies recommended in this episode Shallow Grave Lifeboat Sleeping with Other People Get tickets for our LIVE SHOW in D.C. in August! Visit STUART’S BAR, HINTERLANDS.

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Sort of like MASH, but not about the army and terrible.Consider our debt to "He's the Housecat (Arthur's Theme)" music video contest winner Dan Costales paid in full! Was it worth it Dan? Was if worth the pain you caused, making us watch the pre-Oscar Halle Berry racist stereotype comedy "BAPS?" Meanwhile Elliott continually implies Martin Landau is a vampire, Stuart reveals how all males are sexually threatened by him, and Dan suggests that the Crypt Keeper should've come up with a better BAP*S twist. Movies recommended in this episode:The LEGO MovieBeauty is Embarrassing The Sea WolfThe Professionals

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Ryan Reynolds' abs are RIPD like lettuce. We ease Elliott back into the Flop House groove with a movie right in our wheelhouse: the Men in Black/Ghostbusters-lite disaster R.I.P.D. Meanwhile Dan introduces the concept of ghost hats, Elliott uses the new recording space for its foley possibilities, Stu rails against shark-drummer racism, and the whole gang does their impeccable Boston accents.Movies recommended in this episode:Who's That Knocking at My DoorSudden DeathRay Harryhausen: Special Effects TitanCaptain Phillips

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Elliott is back from his brief sabbatical. Will the possible evil-doll-antics of The Boy make him regret it? Meanwhile Stuart makes people's days better with a choking hazard, Dan's bachelor lifestyle is depressing, and Elliott shares why he has the cleanest poop in town. Wikipedia synopsis for The Boy. Movies recommended in this episode Mistress America De Palma The Face of Another Fright Night

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First confession: she peed in the pool. Hallie closes out her monthlong residency subbing for the newly-dad-ified Elliott with a doozy. It's Tyler Perry's Temptation: Confessions of a Marriage Counselor. Meanwhile Stu can't seem to pronounce Kim Kardashian correctly, Dan advertises his new calendar concern, and Hallie outlines a proper musical exercise routine. Media recommended in this episode:True DetectiveYou're NextLovelace

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Hallie rejoins us, while Elliott is briefly away, to determine whether any tears were jerked by the Nicholas Sparks tearjerker, The Choice. Meanwhile Stuart reveals the Hamburglar's m-o, Dan discusses the strange things he's slept on, and Hallie explains the romantic troubles of dating someone on the metric system. Movies recommended in this episode Mr. Arkadin Entertainment Cross of Iron

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It's the Flop House crew vs. the Dream Team in an all-out dance/bad movie fight to the finish, as we discuss Battle of the Year. Meanwhile, Stu challenges our missing co-host for synopsis supremacy, Dan discusses Vincent Van Gogh's battle with his own body, and Hallie drops the world's best rooster pun.

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Live from Cake Shop as part of NYC Podfest. It's Gods of Egypt.

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Go away, Getaway Hawkey Holidays to all the little Flop House boys and girls. Your present is the movie-length chase scene Getaway.  Meanwhile,  Dan takes on the liberal media, Stuart gives one of his patented Flop House asides, and Elliott reminds us all of Dorf's amazing performance in Don't Look Now.Movies recommended in this episode:The Hobbit: The Desolation of SmaugThe GetawayRoninThe Ballad of Cable HogueOur Town

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On this episode we discuss the should-be-more-hateable tale of young aspiring DJ douches We Are Your Friends. Meanwhile, Elliott describes a Golden Girls party at length, Stuart burns Broadway, and Dan slowly dies. Apologies for the wonky audio. Due to his cold, Dan may have made a recording mistake with the microphones. Movies recommended in this episode: In the Blood Krampus Captain America: Civil War The 13th Warrior Portrait of Jason

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You can have my Christmas when you pry it from my cold dead hand. Hey, remember when we all used to celebrate Christmas? Last Ounce of Courage takes us back to that magical time.  Meanwhile,  Stu is upset at the way Wolverine treated his Christmas gift, Dan fails to have perspective about his knee, and Elliott reveals the Jesus/Ducktales crossover. Movies recommended in this episode:TargetsStokerMy Name is Nobody

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This episode is part three in a podcrawl with the guys at Read it and Weep, and at Too Beautiful to Live, covering the entire Look Who's Talking trilogy. We got to handle the thrilling conclusion, Look Who's Talking Now. Meanwhile we discover what's in the file titled "Things Stuart Knows," Dan reveals his shameful Simpsons past, and Elliott pitches "Fiddler on the Wolf Goes West." Movies recommended in this episode: Ricki and the Flash The Invitation China 9, Liberty 37

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JAYDEN WILL BE RECOGNIZED. It's the movie they tried to pretend M. Night Shyamalan had nothing to do with: After Earth.  Meanwhile,  Elliott introduces us to the Crypt Keeper's brother, Stuart meets his Phantasm hero, and Dan just needs to explain a few things first. Movies recommended in this episode:Bad MiloBlue is the Warmest Color99 River Street

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Two is the Cloneliest Number The three peaches spend this episode cloning around about Star Wars: Episode II: Attack of the Clones, as part of a podcrawl with Read it and Weep (who took on Episode I) and Proudly Resents (who will be taking on Episode III).  Meanwhile, Dan's space gaydar is misaligned, Elliott explains the proper way to steal a cake, and the greatest secrets of Stuart's nerdiness are revealed. Movies recommended in this episode:War WitchInside Llewyn DavisNightwatch

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Simulates a real Foodfight, in that it leaves you pained, sticky, and wanting to vomit. Hey, you guys ever think to yourself, "I like Toy Story, but I wish it could be more commercial, ugly, and frenetic?" Welcome to Foodfight! Meanwhile, Dan points out the movie's one "goof," Stuart brings it back to "Just One of the Guys," and Elliott introduces his new "Southern Tin Tin Enthusiast" character. Movies recommended in this episode:GojiraThe Last UnicornWalker

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With the glamour and horror of our 200th/MaxFun Drive episode behind us, we return to meat-and-potatoes flophousery with the little seen sci-fi actioner Vice, starring Flop House repeat offenders Thomas Jane and Bruce Willis. Meanwhile, Elliott explains the risks of marrying Shannon Tweed, Dan takes a fantasy trip to the set of the sitcom Wings, and Stuart makes a shocking leap ahead in Radio Zork Movies recommended in this episode: Green Room10 Cloverfield LaneThe Forbidden Room

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Sequel to "The Binge" Hey guys, who do you think you're gonna murder during The Purge this year? Meanwhile, Dan argues for greater creativity in purge-crime, Elliott introduces "Spoiler Alert Rod Serling," and Stuart makes us all uncomfortable with his sudden surge in the perv ratings.Movies recommended in this episode:The Phantom of the OperaNight of the DemonsThe GrannyGravityMad Love

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Really captures the boredom of waiting at the ATM. Thank you ATM for blowing the lid off the all-too-common crime of ATM serial killing. Meanwhile, Stuart discovers the concept of the spoiler alert, and Elliott and Dan trade impressions of one of the most oft-imitated voices in Hollywood usurping the signature role of another most-imitated-voice in Hollywood.Movies recommended in this episode:BelowAmerican MaryPersonaIn the Mouth of Madness

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It's the moment we promised would never happen: we watched Elliott and Dan's stated least-favorite movie of all time, Nothing but Trouble. (Don't worry - despite Elliott's joking claim that if we ever did this film it would be our last, this is NOT our final episode). And to help us out with this special MAX FUN DRIVE episode (donate!), we welcome self-proclaimed minor television celebrity, Mr. John Hodgman. Meanwhile, Elliott breaks out his "Jane Campion accent, Stuart reveals his popcorn secrets, And Hodgman joins in at making fun of Dan's pronunciation. Movies recommended in this episode: The StingWitchtrapBroadcast NewsThe Housemaid

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Help, Olympus Has Fallen, and it can't get up! (No detailed notes this week, because 2/3 of the Original Peaches are in Los Angeles this weekend, including the one who writes the show notes and really should be packing RIGHT NOW.)

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Unfortunately not the sequel to Topsy-Turvy. Upside Down is a movie about two young lovers from planets with reverse gravity, and we somehow make it through the whole episode without making a joke about 69-ing. Meanwhile, Stuart gets his annual review, Dan can't stop getting all science-y, Elliott discusses auto-erotic time travel, and... we'll let you enjoy the surprise.

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Just in time for MaxFun Drive, a little bonus for listeners.

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More accurately, bullet "in" the head, and then quickly "out" of the head. Walter Hill has made several great movies in his career. Is Bullet to the Head one of them? Meanwhile, Stuart unveils a new impression in his repertoire, Dan inspires a discussion about the horrors of gorilla sex, and Elliott keeps missing our special celebrity guest.Movies recommended in this episode:Big Brown EyesThe Queen of VersaillesClose Up

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The prequel to Teen Witch (we assume). Hansel & Gretel Witch Hunters was produced by Adam McCay, so it was clearly meant as a goof, but is that enough? Meanwhile, Elliott makes an indecent proposal, Dan reveals a startling breadth of knowledge regarding Misty Mundae's acting career, and Stuart lays down the pun laws. Also, the OP's receive the GREATEST GIFT IN THE HISTORY OF MANKIND.

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We hope the psychic damage we endured was worth it do you guys: we finally caved and watched Marmaduke. Meanwhile, Elliott reveals Marmaduke's historical shenanigans, Stuart's Pacific Rim review gets scatological, and Dan would be indulging in blatant Parade-pandering with his Howard Huge reference, if we hadn't recorded before they endorsed us.0:00 - 0:30 - Introduction and theme.0:31 - 41:38 - Wait, this ISN'T a movie about a duke made out of marmalade?41:39 - 42:17 - Final judgments.41:18 - 43:47 - Some brief shout-outs to our podcast friends.43:48 - 55:06 - Flop House Movie Mailbag55:07 - 1:05:42 - The sad bastards recommend.1:05:43 - 1:07:31 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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It's the Jewish magical realism tale that almost made Elliott hate his own Judaism: The Cobbler. Meanwhile, Stuart suffers from cartoon eye degeneration, Dan would like you to know very much that he's a wealthy murderer, and Elliott's singing has started to  bleed dangerously outside the letters section. Movies recommended in this episode: The Deer Hunter The Witch Chi-Raq

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Ebert was right about you. 0:00 - 0:29 - Introduction and theme.0:30 - 8:00 - We take a long time to reveal something that's revealed in the episode title.8:01 - 40:09 - Nathaniel Hawthorne's timeless classic about bath voyeurism.40:10 - 42:01 - Final judgments.42:02 - 1:00:534 - Flop House Movie Mailbag1:00:35 - 1:05:53 - The sad bastards recommend.1:05:54 - 1:08:11 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Is Seventh Son seventh fun? Perhaps, though we're not sure what "seventh fun" means. Meanwhile, Elliott pitches us on FXXX, Stuart expresses his love for fantasy bullshit maps, and Dan feels terrible about mixing up En Vogue and TLC. We also debut Jonathan Biegen's "That's How it Works (feat. The Flop House)." And a warning for sensitive listeners -- we briefly get serious during the letters section with some talk about suicide. Movies recommended in this episode: Close RangeDiary of a Teenage GirlMiddle of Nowhere

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Yippee ki-yay, mother floppers. 0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 39:03 - An old man goes to Russia and crashes a lot of cars.39:04- 43:35- Final judgments.43:36- 47:14- A word from our sponsor.47:15 - 1:00:59 - Flop House Movie Mailbag1:00:01 - 1:04:41 - The sad bastards recommend.1:04:42 - 1:06:22 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Will Cameron Crowe ever rebound from his Elizabethtown slump? Probably not with the even-worse Aloha. Meanwhile, Dan calls out famed painter Leonardo Da Vinci, Elliott can't remember the rich Bazooka Joe cast of characters, and Stu engages in something that's definitely a bit. Movies recommended in this episode: It's Such a Beautiful DaySicarioClass of 1984

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A little something extra from our Jaws: The Revenge live screening

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If you're a new listener, here's a good place to start!

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WOOOOLVERIIIINES! 0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 36:26 - North Korea would've gotten away with it, too, if it wasn't for you meddling kids!36:27 - 37:47- Final judgments.37:48- 43:47 - A word from our sponsor.43:48 - 57:32 - Flop House Movie Mailbag57:33 - 1:02:11 - The sad bastards recommend.1:02:12 - 1:03:34 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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It's a super-sized, super-fun, super-technical-glitch-filled CONTEST WINNER SELECTION EPISODE! Tom Horstmann requested that we watch the 1986's The Golden Child, AKA "Don't worry about rewriting the screenplay; Eddie Murphy can improvise any action movie into a comedy!" Meanwhile Stuart uncovers the racist motives of the BK Kids Club, Elliott takes down beloved dead comedian Bill Hicks, and Dan advocates the Morvern style of menswear. Movies recommended in this episode: Man UpThe Hateful EightComing to America

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For this year's Cagemas we honor both the kindly St. Nicholas Cage, and Star Wars by picking the Cage-Hayden Christiansen joint, Outcast. Meanwhile, Stuart does an ad for Clearasil, Elliott contributes his worst Popeye, and, yet again, Stu and Elliott interrupt Dan when he's trying to do something nice for other people. Merry Cagemas. Special Cagemas and Cagenuka themes courtesy of Jonathan Biegen. Movies recommended in this episode: The Big Short Magic Mike XXL Bone Tomahawk

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On this episode we uncharacteristically talk sports, specifically futbol, as we watched the definitely-not-about-a-corrupt-organization FIFA film, United Passions. And who better to join us as we wade into these unfamiliar waters than sports expert and Flop House nemesis, David Kalan.  Elliott introduces us to the American Bean Council mascot, Stuart coins an all-new word, Dan instructs you on sportsball Fisher Stevens cosplay, and David tells us a fascinating story about Executive Decision. Movies recommended in this episode: Shaolin SoccerSteve JobsThe Battered Bastards of BaseballBeasts of No NationSicarioBeau Geste

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Remember when Chappie fever swept the country, with all those pet Chappies, and tickle-me-Chappies? Meanwhile, Elliott describes a literary-technique-based dystopian future, Stuart continues to explain the Internet, and Dan just checks out for a while. Like, he totally doesn't talk for seven minutes or something. Sorry, it was a long week. Movies recommended in this episode: Dead or AliveDrunk, Stoned, Brilliant, DeadWifePremonition Following an Evil Deed

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Think you're too good for the Oxford comma, Men, Women & Children? WELL WE'RE TOO GOOD FOR YOU. Meanwhile Stu explains "X-Men nudity," Dan makes a call for an annotated Flop House, and Elliott explains the music your kids' kids are gonna love. Oh, and also there's a BIG ANNOUNCEMENT. Movies recommended in this episode: SpectreGrandmaThe Ipcress FileRazorback

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Every Shocktober must come, sadly, to an end, but not without our longest (and best?) episode of the month. Dan Macabre, Booart Skellington, and Elliott Killin' are joined by Hellie Haglund to discuss "Ouija," the movie that captures the thrill of moving a piece of wood across a board. Meanwhile Stuart discovers the double-meaning to House II, Dan expands his masterful celebrity impression repertoire, which turns the tables on interrupting Elliott, and Hallie insists that Ingmar Bergman was a breast man.Movies recommended in this episode:SecondsCreepMy Best FiendGinza CosmeticsThanks for all the inquiries about the health of Lulu, Dan's cat. Unfortunately, he and Sarah had to put her to sleep after 12 love-filled years. Her suffering is over, and now she's sniffing Hallie's boots in heaven. We miss her.

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No show notes because Dan is busy nursing a sick cat.

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As part of the MaxFun Great Switcheroo, Justin, Travis, Griffin, and Merle McElroy of The Adventure Zone have taken on Leprechaun: Origins. Meanwhile, if you want to hear the Original Peaches (plus guest star Zhubin Parang) you can find them playing D&D over at The Adventure Zone!

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It's the most magical time of the year! SHOCKTOBER! And this year we're kicking off with the millenials-on-a-computer-screen shocker "Unfriended." Meanwhile, Dan reads movie ad copy, Elliott talks Quidditch injuries, and Stuart reveals his poop fears.Movies recommended in this episode:The VisitThe Leopard ManThe Late Show

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No show notes on account of Emmys.

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No show notes this week.

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Straight from Cannes to Lifetime (TM), it's the Grace Kelly biopic, Grace of Monaco. Meanwhile Elliott has a surprisingly deep well of Saved by the Bell knowledge, Dan speculates about Curly's gold, and Stuart finds a new way to leave Dan out of things.Movies recommended in this episode:The DropProject NimObvious Child

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Take two faded stars, put them in an Aussie C-picture, and encourage them to improvise wildly, and what do you get? The oddly compelling Drive Hard. Meanwhile Elliott improves various movies by adding a little vitamin C(age), Dan reveals what the H.P. in H.P. Lovecraft stands for, and Stuart almost gets Billy Joel lyrics right.Movies recommended in this episode:My Brilliant CareerBreaker MorantThe Dirty DozenThe Interview (1998)

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Show notes canceled on account of SUMMER.

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In this episode, Jordan Morris of terrific MaxFun sister podcast Jordan, Jesse, Go! stops by to co-host while Elliott's in England, a move he immediately regretted when we watched Strange Magic. Meanwhile, Dan explains the proper way to drink beer, Stuart evinces his disdain for improv, and Jordan displays his surprisingly deep knowledge of Three Ninjas. Movies recommended in this episode:The Super CopsThe OvernightResults

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Will the guys who liked Speed Racer also enjoy the Wachowski sibling's most recent critical flop, Jupiter Ascending? Meanwhile Elliott debuts his new bumper sticker, Dan boringly digresses about The Three Investigators, and Stuart explains why, when incarcerating someone, you should really take their rocket boots.Movies recommended in this episode:CreepFlash GordonBarbarellaThe Visitor

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Detailed show notes abandoned this week, as Dan and Elliott are winging their way to Montreal for a wedding!

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Hoo boy does Johnny Depp certainly have a mustache in Mortdcai!  Meanwhile Dan reads copy off a beer for some reason, Elliott invites George Lucas to stop by, and Stuart recommends a surprising film.Movies recommended in this episode:Mad Max: Fury RoadNeed for SpeedStuart Wellington mystery recommendation

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In the words of Homer Simpson, we've got a hankerin' for some spankerin', as we discuss 50 Shades of Grey.  Meanwhile Stuart delivers a eulogy for the rappin' granny, Elliott explains the laziness of British elocution, Dan reveals a porn tale from his past, and we include perhaps our best outtakes ever.Movies recommended in this episode:What We Do in the ShadowsLucyDownhill Racer

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We've seen him 3D, but are we ready for Dracula: Untold? Meanwhile Stuart demonstrates his innovative mixology, and Elliot and Dan reveal the surprising Dracula-centric details of the Mad Men finale.Movies recommended in this episode:Donnie BrascoSpringDracula: Pages from a Virgin's Diary

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It's the moment that the bad movie cognoscenti have been waiting for, as we discuss The Boy Next Door. Meanwhile, Stuart explains the "character" he plays, Dan becomes a proponent of the female gaze, and Elliott describes some of the lesser-known sexually explicit Disney cartoons of the 60's.Movies recommended in this episode:CitizenfourFaultsIt Follows

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We return to the "romantic fantasy" genre that served us so well (?) with Upside Down as we discuss the Colin Farrell vehicle, Winter's Tale. Meanwhile, Dan explains Aerosmith's magic powers, Elliott implores a horse to help him make his booty call, and Stuart wonders whether he was the one in Spaceballs. Movies recommended in this episode:Run All NightIt FollowsLove Affair, or the Case of the Missing Switchboard Operator

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It's the MaxFun drive! And, though Stu is in Puerto Rico, we pulled out the big guns with a return appearance by Hallie Haglund! She adds some much needed perspective to the asshole-dude-based RomCommery of That Awkward Moment. Meanwhile Elliott reveals his hatred of smooth men who have a lot of sex, Dan is, yet again, accused of racism, and Hallie can't get over the similarity between our lead actress and farts.Movies recommended in this episode:Cold in JulyAll Good ThingsMan is Not a Bird

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Turns out that being Christopher Nolan's cinematographer is not the same thing as being Christopher Nolan, as we found out when we endured Transcendence. Meanwhile Elliott explains Dan's unusual way of reading, Stuart has a Transmorphers flashback, and Dan sings a little cow opera. Movies recommended in this episode:The Evil ClergymanThe Woman on the BeachSunshine

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There's just something about a terrible kids' movie that brings out the best (?) in us, so we dive headfirst into the CGI flop Legends of OZ: Dorothy's Return. Meanwhile, Stuart gives important advice to our kidnapped listeners, Dan inadvertently pitches the new hit movie "Uncatchable," and Bizzarro Elliott makes an appearance. Movies and TV recommended in this episode: SorcererWildLogan's Run

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Flop House repeat offender Idris Elba romances Taraji P. Henson in the Valentine's Day favorite No Good Deed. Wait, did we say "romances?" We meant "terrorizes." Meanwhile Elliott tells us of James Bond films of the future, Dan tries to play a game of Radio Zork, and Stuart introduces the new Sweet Amazing Candy Penis.Movies recommended in this episode:RomaHappy ChristmasCoherence

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We will never watch anything with nearly three hour bloat again, so enjoy the special snowflake that is us talking about the most recent Bayhem, Transformers: Age of Extinction. Meanwhile, Elliott explains how to find a Transformer's clitoris, Stuart keeps on Castle Freakin' on, and sleepy Dan (sort of) returns.Movies recommended in this episode:Winter LightZRock N Roll Nightmare

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Recorded on 1/9/2015 in front of a live, sold out crowd in The Bell House in Gowanus, Brooklyn. A huge thanks to Mr. Matt Carman (1/2 of the excellent zine "I Love Bad Movies") for recording the show and making sure we sound as good as we do.

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Merry Cagemas everyone! The store was all out of Left Behind (well... it hasn't been released to video or streaming yet), so we got you a Rage. We hope you're not too disappointed. Meanwhile Elliott reads the Looney Tunes dinner specials, Dan reveals the medical source of his word-slurring, and Stuart just can't stop chewing. Movies recommended in this episode:NightcrawlerFoxcatcherFor a Few Dollars More9 Deaths of the Ninja

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Song of the autumn contest winner Jason MacIssac decreed that we should be subjected to legendary season-one-of-American-Idol ancillary flop From Justin to Kelly. Did he take it easy on us, or is there now a bounty on his head? Meanwhile Stuart introduces his innovative new restaurant concept, and Elliott murders Dan on air.  Movies recommended in this episode:Inherent ViceThe Hobbit: Battle of the Five ArmiesNine Days of One Year

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A returning Flop House director guides a cast of returning Flop House stars in an eruption of mediocrity named Pompeii. Meanwhile Stu asks a provocative question about Cenobites, Elliott reveals an early draft of a Robert Louis Stevenson classic, and Dan debuts his new hit character. Movies recommended in this episode:VolcanoHouseboundThe HurricaneThe Chant of Jimmie Blacksmith

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Detailed show notes canceled on account of Dan being sick with Mongolian death flu. Movies recommended in this episode:The Woman ChaserShort Term 12Phase IVJohn Wick

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Thus  we enter November, the month known for having "No" theme. And, appropriately, we watched one of the most generic of modern action sequels, 300: Rise of an Empire. Meanwhile, Elliott lectures on Noid avoidance, Dan makes a public apology relating to one type of music and attacks another, and Stu makes an exciting announcement for enjoyers of comical books.

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Shocktober continues/ends with Dario Argento totally forgetting everything he knew about filmmaking (and we don't even like him that much) with Dracula 3D. Meanwhile, Dan reveals the alternate, director's cut ending to Escape (The Pina Colada Song), Elliott out-pervs the pervazoid with his demands for more nudity, and Stuart once again astounds with his facility for accents. Movies recommended in this episode:Shadow of the VampireDuelThe Hitcher

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BOOOOOGENS! Welcome to the first episode of SHOCKTOBER 2014 (and the first episode officially under our new podcast network, MaxFun). And because we would never Halloween trick you, instead we're treating you to a guest appearance by Hallie Haglund, sitting in with the OP's, to discuss The Quiet Ones. Meanwhile, Elliott lists all the great MaxFun podcasts, Stuart once again shows his ignorance of all things Internet, and Hallie puts Dan in his place. Movies and TV recommended in this episode: From BeyondThe ReturnedWitchboardThe Hidden

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Smalltember continues with perhaps the smallest movie we've ever covered, the bad movie new classic "A Talking Cat!?!" Meanwhile Stuart entertains the lizard representative of Harlem, Elliott gives helpful mnemonic devices for the major German directors, and Dan does some research into the pervy past of the movie's creative team. Movies recommended in this episode:Intimate LightingThe GuestEnemy

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The OP's are all back in action, celebrating the all-NEW made-up holiday of "Smallvember." First up, the Christsploitation film "God's Not Dead" filled with the straw-manniest straw men outside of a county fair.  Meanwhile Elliott and Detective Columbo disprove the flat Earth theory, Stuart reveals a surprising knowledge of the Christian rock genre, and Dan announces a new contest! Movies recommended in this episode:Jodorowsky's DuneThe Last of SheilaThe One I Love

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Thanks to his series of enraged tweets on the matter, we invited comedy writer and pop culture expert Kevin Maher on the show to discuss the enragingly anthropomorphized Walking with Dinosaurs. Meanwhile Dan pervazoids up the Crypt Keeper, Kevin unleashes his dad rage, and Stuart yet again shows his understanding of America's youth.Movies recommended in this episode:Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007)Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (1982)Into the Woods (American Playhouse, 1991)Drinking BuddiesCloudy with a Chance of Meatballs

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No movie has sexualized pastry so much since American Pie, yet somehow Labor Day is even less erotic than Jason Biggs balls-deep in apple filling. Meanwhile Stuart does some brilliant voice work, Dan loves the versatility of DVDs, and Elliott regales the world with Tales of Ruck.Movies recommended in this episode:The Crazies (1973)The Crazies (2010)Edge of TomorrowAlan Partridge

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With audiences primed to be disappointed by a new Hercules movie in theaters, why not be like the Peaches and be disappointed by The Legend of Hercules in the comfort of your own home. Meanwhile Elliott tells us the secrets of the ancient Greek hamburger, Dan has uncanny recall for old Disney cartoons, and Stuart tells sad tales of British totty.Movies recommended in this episode:SnowpiercerThe Lego MovieThe Hunger Games: Catching Fire12 Years a SlaveMuppets Most Wanted Jack Ryan: Shadow RecruitDogtoothZ

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Producer Luc Besson and director McG made a bet about the number of tones they could cram into 3 Days to Kill, and the audience lost. Meanwhile Elliott does his classic "2000 Year-Old Killer" routine, Dan gets more inappropriately sexual than ever before, Stu introduces the concept of a "neck baby," and TVs Jessica Williams stops by, because why the heck not?Movies recommended in this episode:The LimeyThey Came TogetherObvious ChildThe Sea Wolf

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We discuss Last Vegas, which is, of course, a documentary from the far future about the time the elderly Original Peaches and friend went to Las Vegas. Meanwhile Dan unveils his totally original, copyrighted concept, Elliott reveals how he does creep research, and Stu pulls out a letters surprise.Movies recommended in this episode:Stop Making SenseLolaStakeland

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Yes, Elliott, it should be called I, Frankenstein's Monster, but that doesn't change the fact that we watched I, Frankenstein. Meanwhile Elliott reveals the secret sex fetishes of Archie Comics characters, we learn Stuart's nicknames, and Dan asks the big metaphysical questions.Movies recommended in this episode:The GrannyThe Wages of FearDeceptive Practice: The Mysteries and Mentors of Ricky JayWhat's the Matter With Helen?

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Despite being one of the more nothing movies we've ever watched, we somehow crap out what we believe to be our longest episode with G.I. Joe: Retaliation. It's a living. Meanwhile, Dan and Elliott explain what "G.I. Joe" means, and develop President Ziggy, and Stuart reveals he's an evil land developer.Movies recommended in this episode:Raising CainVideodromeDeath Rides a Horse

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We discuss Easy Rider: The Ride Back, an object lesson in why you should never let a movie's sequel rights lapse. Meanwhile Dan explains the Flop House fan caste system, Elliott puts the "bar" in barter, and Stuart knows nothing about robots.Movies recommended in this episode:Blade IIThe EastMy Dinner With Andre

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1980 was a simpler time, when you could put Clint Eastwood together with an orangutan, not bother to come up with a story, and release it as a major motion picture called Any Which Way but Loose (check out We Hate Movies doing the first film in the "Clint goes ape" series, Every Which Way but Loose HERE). Meanwhile Dan runs through several impeccable celebrity impressions, Elliott explains a rare sex act, and Stu discusses what orangutans did to get orangutan news before Google alerts.Movies recommended in this episode:Blue RuinI Saw the DevilShock Corridor

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Hey remember those DeNiro and Stallone boxing movies you loved? This is also... a movie. We talk about Grudge Match, the movie that pretends DeNiro has a chance against steroidal Stallone. Meanwhile Dan discusses Kevin Hart's need to do only Kevin-branded movies, Elliott uncovers Sean Connery's strange belief he's in every movie, and one of Stu's relatives makes an unexpected appearance. Movies recommended in this episode:The Set-UpUnder the SkinThe Raid 2

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Han Solo vs. Commissioner Gordon sounds awesome, until you realize the star of Paranoia is actually a Hemsworth brother. And not the good one. Meanwhile Elliott doubles down on the size of Gary Oldman's penis, Stuart disturbs us by talking about intimate times and Dan introduces the notion of a California Raisins fetish. A note: in this episode Dan confuses Baba Yaga with Strega Nona. Movies recommended in this episode:The Grand Budapest HotelThe VisitorThe Sweet Smell of Success

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Uh, one question, boss: Doesn't Gangster Squad kind of sound like WE'RE the Gangsters?We return to a big, old-fashioned Hollywood flop with Gangster Squad, the movie that takes a bunch of good actors and a promising director and churns out a film thats absurd and deadly dull by turns. Meanwhile Elliott gives Hoagie Carmichael gift advice, Stuart comes out for cast awareness, and Dan is tired and really doesn't keep up his end of the co-hosting duties. This episode brought to you by the letter "H."Movies recommended in this episode:The Roaring TwentiesThe Friends of Eddie CoyleManhunterGrand Piano

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The solution to "Devil's Kidney Stone." In which Dan makes the mistake of thinking that, because Renny Harlin directed Devil's Pass, it would be crazy and weird, rather than draggy and significantly more boring than reading the Wikipedia page about the real Dyatlov Pass incident. Then, we forgo letters and recommendations to offer a condensed version of our usual Awards Floptacular, because no one (including us) really cared much about the Awards Floptacular anyway.

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Sort of like MASH, but not about the army and terrible.Consider our debt to "He's the Housecat (Arthur's Theme)" music video contest winner Dan Costales paid in full! Was it worth it Dan? Was if worth the pain you caused, making us watch the pre-Oscar Halle Berry racist stereotype comedy "BAPS?" Meanwhile Elliott continually implies Martin Landau is a vampire, Stuart reveals how all males are sexually threatened by him, and Dan suggests that the Crypt Keeper should've come up with a better BAP*S twist. Movies recommended in this episode:The LEGO MovieBeauty is Embarrassing The Sea WolfThe Professionals

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Ryan Reynolds' abs are RIPD like lettuce. We ease Elliott back into the Flop House groove with a movie right in our wheelhouse: the Men in Black/Ghostbusters-lite disaster R.I.P.D. Meanwhile Dan introduces the concept of ghost hats, Elliott uses the new recording space for its foley possibilities, Stu rails against shark-drummer racism, and the whole gang does their impeccable Boston accents.Movies recommended in this episode:Who's That Knocking at My DoorSudden DeathRay Harryhausen: Special Effects TitanCaptain Phillips

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First confession: she peed in the pool. Hallie closes out her monthlong residency subbing for the newly-dad-ified Elliott with a doozy. It's Tyler Perry's Temptation: Confessions of a Marriage Counselor. Meanwhile Stu can't seem to pronounce Kim Kardashian correctly, Dan advertises his new calendar concern, and Hallie outlines a proper musical exercise routine. Media recommended in this episode:True DetectiveYou're NextLovelace

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It's the Flop House crew vs. the Dream Team in an all-out dance/bad movie fight to the finish, as we discuss Battle of the Year. Meanwhile, Stu challenges our missing co-host for synopsis supremacy, Dan discusses Vincent Van Gogh's battle with his own body, and Hallie drops the world's best rooster pun.

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Go away, Getaway Hawkey Holidays to all the little Flop House boys and girls. Your present is the movie-length chase scene Getaway.  Meanwhile,  Dan takes on the liberal media, Stuart gives one of his patented Flop House asides, and Elliott reminds us all of Dorf's amazing performance in Don't Look Now.Movies recommended in this episode:The Hobbit: The Desolation of SmaugThe GetawayRoninThe Ballad of Cable HogueOur Town

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You can have my Christmas when you pry it from my cold dead hand. Hey, remember when we all used to celebrate Christmas? Last Ounce of Courage takes us back to that magical time.  Meanwhile,  Stu is upset at the way Wolverine treated his Christmas gift, Dan fails to have perspective about his knee, and Elliott reveals the Jesus/Ducktales crossover. Movies recommended in this episode:TargetsStokerMy Name is Nobody

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JAYDEN WILL BE RECOGNIZED. It's the movie they tried to pretend M. Night Shyamalan had nothing to do with: After Earth.  Meanwhile,  Elliott introduces us to the Crypt Keeper's brother, Stuart meets his Phantasm hero, and Dan just needs to explain a few things first. Movies recommended in this episode:Bad MiloBlue is the Warmest Color99 River Street

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Two is the Cloneliest Number The three peaches spend this episode cloning around about Star Wars: Episode II: Attack of the Clones, as part of a podcrawl with Read it and Weep (who took on Episode I) and Proudly Resents (who will be taking on Episode III).  Meanwhile, Dan's space gaydar is misaligned, Elliott explains the proper way to steal a cake, and the greatest secrets of Stuart's nerdiness are revealed. Movies recommended in this episode:War WitchInside Llewyn DavisNightwatch

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Simulates a real Foodfight, in that it leaves you pained, sticky, and wanting to vomit. Hey, you guys ever think to yourself, "I like Toy Story, but I wish it could be more commercial, ugly, and frenetic?" Welcome to Foodfight! Meanwhile, Dan points out the movie's one "goof," Stuart brings it back to "Just One of the Guys," and Elliott introduces his new "Southern Tin Tin Enthusiast" character. Movies recommended in this episode:GojiraThe Last UnicornWalker

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Sequel to "The Binge" Hey guys, who do you think you're gonna murder during The Purge this year? Meanwhile, Dan argues for greater creativity in purge-crime, Elliott introduces "Spoiler Alert Rod Serling," and Stuart makes us all uncomfortable with his sudden surge in the perv ratings.Movies recommended in this episode:The Phantom of the OperaNight of the DemonsThe GrannyGravityMad Love

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Really captures the boredom of waiting at the ATM. Thank you ATM for blowing the lid off the all-too-common crime of ATM serial killing. Meanwhile, Stuart discovers the concept of the spoiler alert, and Elliott and Dan trade impressions of one of the most oft-imitated voices in Hollywood usurping the signature role of another most-imitated-voice in Hollywood.Movies recommended in this episode:BelowAmerican MaryPersonaIn the Mouth of Madness

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Help, Olympus Has Fallen, and it can't get up! (No detailed notes this week, because 2/3 of the Original Peaches are in Los Angeles this weekend, including the one who writes the show notes and really should be packing RIGHT NOW.)

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Unfortunately not the sequel to Topsy-Turvy. Upside Down is a movie about two young lovers from planets with reverse gravity, and we somehow make it through the whole episode without making a joke about 69-ing. Meanwhile, Stuart gets his annual review, Dan can't stop getting all science-y, Elliott discusses auto-erotic time travel, and... we'll let you enjoy the surprise.

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More accurately, bullet "in" the head, and then quickly "out" of the head. Walter Hill has made several great movies in his career. Is Bullet to the Head one of them? Meanwhile, Stuart unveils a new impression in his repertoire, Dan inspires a discussion about the horrors of gorilla sex, and Elliott keeps missing our special celebrity guest.Movies recommended in this episode:Big Brown EyesThe Queen of VersaillesClose Up

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The prequel to Teen Witch (we assume). Hansel & Gretel Witch Hunters was produced by Adam McCay, so it was clearly meant as a goof, but is that enough? Meanwhile, Elliott makes an indecent proposal, Dan reveals a startling breadth of knowledge regarding Misty Mundae's acting career, and Stuart lays down the pun laws. Also, the OP's receive the GREATEST GIFT IN THE HISTORY OF MANKIND.

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We hope the psychic damage we endured was worth it do you guys: we finally caved and watched Marmaduke. Meanwhile, Elliott reveals Marmaduke's historical shenanigans, Stuart's Pacific Rim review gets scatological, and Dan would be indulging in blatant Parade-pandering with his Howard Huge reference, if we hadn't recorded before they endorsed us.0:00 - 0:30 - Introduction and theme.0:31 - 41:38 - Wait, this ISN'T a movie about a duke made out of marmalade?41:39 - 42:17 - Final judgments.41:18 - 43:47 - Some brief shout-outs to our podcast friends.43:48 - 55:06 - Flop House Movie Mailbag55:07 - 1:05:42 - The sad bastards recommend.1:05:43 - 1:07:31 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Ebert was right about you. 0:00 - 0:29 - Introduction and theme.0:30 - 8:00 - We take a long time to reveal something that's revealed in the episode title.8:01 - 40:09 - Nathaniel Hawthorne's timeless classic about bath voyeurism.40:10 - 42:01 - Final judgments.42:02 - 1:00:534 - Flop House Movie Mailbag1:00:35 - 1:05:53 - The sad bastards recommend.1:05:54 - 1:08:11 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Yippee ki-yay, mother floppers. 0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 39:03 - An old man goes to Russia and crashes a lot of cars.39:04- 43:35- Final judgments.43:36- 47:14- A word from our sponsor.47:15 - 1:00:59 - Flop House Movie Mailbag1:00:01 - 1:04:41 - The sad bastards recommend.1:04:42 - 1:06:22 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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A little something extra from our Jaws: The Revenge live screening

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WOOOOLVERIIIINES! 0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 36:26 - North Korea would've gotten away with it, too, if it wasn't for you meddling kids!36:27 - 37:47- Final judgments.37:48- 43:47 - A word from our sponsor.43:48 - 57:32 - Flop House Movie Mailbag57:33 - 1:02:11 - The sad bastards recommend.1:02:12 - 1:03:34 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Oh Nicholas Sparks, you're the creepiest! APOLOGIES for the audio issues in this episode -- specifically Dan's ear-splitting levels. It does get (somewhat) better as the episode goes on.0:00 - 0:48 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 39:54 - You play a good game, Butler! But do you play... for KEEPS?39:55 - 40:13- A barely-there final judgments.40:14- 43:47 - A word from our sponsor.43:48 - 58:15 - Flop House Movie Mailbag58:16 - 1:04:42 - The sad bastards recommend.1:04:43 - 1:06:19 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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The Butler did it. 0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 34:16 - You play a good game, Butler! But do you play... for KEEPS?34:17 - 36:16- Final judgments.36:17 - 38:43 - A word from our sponsor.38:44 - 53:53 - Flop House Movie Mailbag53:54  - 1:02:17 - The sad bastards recommend.1:02:18 - 1:04:11 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Warning: listening to this podcast may result in a Smiley attack. 0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 32:22 - It takes us even longer than usual to work up the enthusiasm to talk about Smiley.32:23 - 39:25- Final judgments.39:26 - 40:51- Keep on pluggin'.40:52 - 1:00:20- Flop House Movie Mailbag1:00:21 - 1:07:34 - The sad bastards recommend.1:07:35 - 1:09:25 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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NICHOLAS CA-AAAGE! 0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 36:00 - Some people just feel like home, y'know? Like Nic Cage in Stolen.36:01 - 38:56 - Final judgments..38:57 - 58:32 - Flop House Movie Mailbag58:33- 1:08:11 - The sad bastards recommend.1:08:12 - 1:09:45 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Boy-wise, whose would you say that is? 0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 36:29 - Samberg and Sandler. Together alphabetically, now together in real life.36:30 - 42:12 - Final judgments.42:13 - 44:43 - Some housekeeping and plugs.44:44 - 59:55 - Flop House Movie Mailbag59:56 - 1:05:02 - The sad bastards recommend.1:05:03- 1:06:30 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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The beefy hand of justice! 0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 39:41- Alex Cross gonna make you jump, jump.39:42 - 43:32 - Final judgments.43:33 - 45:21 - Some brief plugs.45:22 - 55:43 - Flop House Movie Mailbag55:44 - 59:54 - The sad bastards recommend.59:55 - 1:01:25 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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A fan-chosen repeat of a classic episode. Enjoy re-living the misery!

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0:00 - 0:32 - Floptacular introduction and theme.0:33 - 27:59 - A discussion of this year's Academy Awards. Remember when those were on? Like three weeks ago? Anyone?28:00 - 34:50 - We give out the most prestigious awards in Hollywood, The Floppies.34:51 - 47:34 - A special year-in-review run of recommendations.47:35 - 59:37 - Flop House Movie Mailbag59:38 - 1:01:00 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Dan's surgery kept him from writing up detailed show notes, which is lame, we know. But come on. Between that and Oogieloves, hasn't he suffered enough?

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:35 - 40:59 - When we were paperboys, we remember a lot less rough sex.41:00 - 42:38 - Final judgments42:29 - 54:32 - Flop House Movie Mailbag54:33 - 1:03:00 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:03:01 - 1:06:55 - The gang's an asshole to Dan, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme.0:35 - 34:36 - That kid's really turning over a new leaf. A NEW LEAF. GET IT? Aaaaah, you don't get it.34:37 - 37:20 - Final judgments37:21 - 38:06 - Plugs38:07 - 54:29 - The only helpful edition of the Flop House Movie Mailbag54:30 - 1:01:28 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:01:29 - 1:03:00 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 42:19 - Hey, Len Wiseman's never made a bad action film starring his wife Kate Beckensale, right? Right?42:20 - 45:14 - Final judgments45:15 - 47:30 - Plugs47:31 - 57:19 - The only helpful edition of the Flop House Movie Mailbag57:2-  - 1:04:00 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:04:01- 1:05:48 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:30 - Introduction and theme.0:31 - 37:37 - The Original Peaches ring out 2012 and ring in the New Year with the man who has given us so much: Nicholas Flopolas Cage.37:38 - 40:10 - Final judgments40:11 - 57:57- Flop House Movie Mailbag57:58  - 1:06:20 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:06:21- 1:08:13 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:31 - Introduction and theme.0:32 - 35:10 - Fan favorite Hallie Haglund subs in for Stu in our discussion of the jukebox gloss-fest, Rock of Ages.35:11 - 39:28 - Final judgments39:29 - 56:58 - Flop House Movie Mailbag, with the very first letters DUET.56:59  - 1:03:36 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:03:37- 1:04:59 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 41:07 - Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter takes us on a 100% accurate tour through American history.41:08 - 42:32 - Final judgments42:33 - 43:40 - All Things Comedy plugs43:41 - 58:17 - Flop House Movie Mailbag58:18 - 1:05:07 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:05:08 - 1:06:22 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Due to Election Day and vacation travel scheduling, show notes for this episode are unavailable. Our apologies. Here is a picture of a funny cat: http://tinyurl.com/mhstpx

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Detailed show notes canceled on account of hurricane.

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0:00 - 0:36 - Introduction and SHOCKtober theme.0:37 - 31:33 - Quoth The Raven, "Wouldn't it be cool if Poe, like, fought a serial killer?!"31:34 - 36:09 - Pumpkin spice flavored final judgments36:10 - 54:18 - Flop House Movie Mailbag54:19 - 59:35 - The sad bastards recommend. 59:36 - 1:01:58 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 31:34 - Isn't it always the way? You meet the man of your dreams, and God gives you butt cancer.31:35 - 32:44 - Final judgments32:45 - 41:55 - Some thanks, some plugs, but most importantly: our BIG ANNOUNCEMENT.41:56 - 54:33 - Flop House Movie Mailbag54:35 - 1:00:53 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:00:54 - 1:02:45 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Apologies for the lack of more detailed show notes, as 2/3 of the Flop House are busy traveling for the GOP and Democratic conventions.

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 35:10 - At least Passion Play is the first Megan Fox movie that's not bad BECAUSE of Megan Fox. That's gotta be worth something, right?35:11 - 38:26 - Final judgments38:27 - 55:05 - Flop House Movie Mailbag55:06 - 59:24 - The sad bastards recommend. 59:25 - 1:00:27 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:36 - Introduction and theme.0:37 - 33:57 - It's not much of a Ghost Rider movie, but at least it has spirit.33:58 - 38:55 - A recap supercut, followed by Final judgments38:56 - 53:35 - Flop House Movie Mailbag53:36 - 1:00:35 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:00:36 - 1:02:21 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 3:57 - After a brief interjection from "The Top House," we take on the perversion of Greek mythology, Immortals.32:55 - 36:20 - Final judgments36:21 - 51:50 - Flop House Movie Mailbag51:51 - 1:01:52 - The sad bastards recommend. 57:19 - 59:22 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Shocktober continues! On this episode we discuss the Flatliners-esque Lazarus Effect. More specific shownotes canceled on account of Dan's sick. Wikipedia synopsis for The Lazarus Effect Movies recommended in this episode: Viy Pet Sematary The Shallows Shin Godzilla

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0:00 - 0:37 - Introduction and theme.0:38 - 3:57 - Some talk of Dan's stubble and much talk of his national TV debut3:58 - 32:45 - A discussion of A Thousand Words, the movie that we assume resulted from Eddie Murphy not wanting to learn a lot of lines.32:46 - 35:53 - Final judgments35:54 - 51:50 - Flop House Movie Mailbag51:51 - 1:01:52 - The most interrupt-y sad bastards recommend ever!. 1:01:53 - 1:04:25 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:29- Introduction and theme.0:30 - 2:12 - We re-introduce guest host Zhubin Parang2:14 - 36:55 - Hey look everyone! It's a dopey thing that people have based their whole philosophy on.36:56 - 40:34 - Final judgments40:35 - 56:46 - Flop House Movie Mailbag50:18 - 1:01:13 - The sad bastards recommend1:01:14 - 1:02:49 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes

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0:00 - 0:48- Introduction, live show reminder, and theme.0:49 - 4:23 - More nonsense than usual.4:24 - 36:18 - When you think "bounty hunter" you think Katherine Heigl. 36:19 - 38:55 - Final judgements38:56 - 50:17 - Flop House Movie Mailbag50:18 - 58:52 - The sad bastards recommend. 58:53 - 1:00:03 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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BOOOGENS! Shocktober begins with Victor Frankenstein, the movie that posits that maybe we don't actually wanna see the monster that much. Meanwhile, Elliott disrespects the death of several major pop artists, Stu brings up Jackie Chan again, and Dan says some weird things about ears and hot dogs. Wikipedia synopsis for Victor Frankenstein. Movies recommended in this episode: Mr. Right The Howling The Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean

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0:00 - 0:31- Introduction and theme.0:32 - 2:15 - Stu talks Puerto Rico and celebrity beefs  2:16 - 36:29 - 'Allo 'allo, it's me, Danyul Craig, wot's all these Cowboys & Aliens, then?36:30 - 37:50 - Final judgements37:51 - 53:00 - Flop House Movie Mailbag53:01 - 59:21 - The sad bastards recommend. 59:22 - 1:00:30 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Smalltember/vember continues! On this episode we discuss the feature length ad for a dating website and for God, Christian Mingle. and Stuart explains how to find cartoon porn, Dan checks his website privilege, and Elliott "Weekend at Bernies"es someone very close to him. Wikipedia synopsis for Christian Mingle. Movies recommended in this episode: Mustang The Duke of Burgundy Hard Target 2

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0:00 - 0:35- Introduction and theme.0:36 - 9:15 - Our guest, Al Madrigal, regales us with tales of what it's like to actually appear in a Flop House-quality film.  9:16 - 49:40 - A discussion of The Last Godfather, a Korean comedy star's attempt to conquer the American market. As crossovers go, it's at least as successful as "Rappin' Rodney."49:41 - 51:27 - Final judgements51:28 - 1:02:00 - Al talks Craigslist moviemaking, and the sad bastards recommend. 1:02:01 - 1:04:26 - A plug, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:44 - Introduction and theme.0:45 - 3:50 - We waste a little time celebrating a meaningless milestone3:51 - 44:04 - A discussion of America's filmmaking apex: Tango & Cash44:05 - 1:00:00 - The Flop House Movie Mailbag1:00:01 - 1:06:431:06:44 - 1:08:00 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Smalltember/vember begins with a movie none of us had heard of until a couple of Canadian listeners pressed a blu-ray into our hot little hands: No Deposit. Meanwhile Elliott reveals Ringo Starr's adventures in New Jersey, Stuart sends a giant child straight to the circus, and Dan delivers a line that should NOT be taken out of context. NO WIKIPEDIA SYNOPSIS for No Deposit. So here's a page for Frank D'Angelo. Movies recommended in this episode: Demolition Man A Midsummer Night's Dream Pather Panchali

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0:00 - 0:36 - Introduction and theme.0:37 - 5:37 - We discuss In Time's "Olivia Wildegate" scandal5:38 - 34:34 - The Three Musketeers has inspired at least twenty full-length film adaptations and many more sequels, shorts, and cartoons. It is timeless tale, impossible to ruin. This film does its damnedest.  34:35 - 38:19 - Final judgements38:20 - 51:20 - Flop House Movie Mailbag51:21 - 1:00:09  - Our longest recommendations in a while1:00:10 - 1:03:00 - Plugs, theme, and outtakes.

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But there was time! Time enough... at last!

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At the request of charity contest winner Erik North, we discuss the classic (?) 1998 version of Godzilla. Meanwhile Dan tries to explain Dangerous Liaisons, Elliott surprises no one by reading a Godzilla-centered magazine, and Stuart gives you some advice about how to get milk. Wikipedia synopsis for Godzilla. Movies recommended in this episode: Tickled Hitchcock/Truffaut Everybody Wants Some! Harlan County U.S.A. MAXFUN MEETUP at HINTERLANDS.

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 34:00 - We discuss The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences' top honor. You know, the one they entrusted to Billy Crystal.34:01 - 44:29 - We bestow the most coveted of all awards: The Floppies.44:30 - 1:00:02 - Flop House Movie Mailbag1:00:03 - 1:07:40  - Some year-end recommendations from 20111:07:41 - 1:10:02 - Plugs, theme, and outtakes.

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Kept in the Flop House Vaults until now, and released because we're on the road in D.C., it's the LIVE Fantastic Four show!   Visit STUART’S BAR, HINTERLANDS.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 2:50 - The peaches reacquaint themselves with each other and this thing called "podcasting."2:51 - 30:20 - We discuss Nic Cage's latest Flop House joint, Trespass, which approached Delgo levels of failure.30:21- 34:18 - Final judgments34:19 - 50:00  - Flop House Movie Mailbag50:01 - 57:29 - The sad bastards recommend.57:30 - 1:02:04- Plugs, theme, and outtakes.

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Zhubin Parang joins us for the fourth most magical time on the Flop House calandar: Cagemas in July! It's also time for the political conventions, so more extensive show notes are canceled while Dan jets off to Cleveland and Philly.

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 6:41 - We introduce our special guest, fellow Daily Show writer Zhubin Parang, and extend thanks to all who came to the live show.6:42 - 37:15 - We discuss Nic Cage's latest Flop House joint, Trespass, which approached Delgo levels of failure.37:16 - 39:50 - Final judgments39:51 - 52:55  - Flop House Movie Mailbag52:56 - 57:00 - The sad bastards recommend.57:01 - 59:27- Frackcast, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 2:30 - A lot of nonsense about bears.0:33 - 2:56 - The usual bullshit.2:57 - 32:08 - Conan hears the lamentations of the Flop House.32:09 - 38:24 - Final judgments38:251 - 52:34  - Flop House Movie Mailbag52:35 - 54:36 - We plug our LIVE EVENT.54:37 - 57:01 - The sad bastards recommend.57:02 - 58:35- Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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We just can't stop punishing ourselves with bizarre kids' computer animated films. Will Norm of the North be another Guardian of the Highlands or Foodfight!? Meanwhile Stuart has strong feelings on Tyrion Lannister's political positions, Elliott mangles Sinatra, and Dan is far too distracted by his loud cat. Wikipedia synopsis for Norm of the North. Movies recommended in this episode Shallow Grave Lifeboat Sleeping with Other People Get tickets for our LIVE SHOW in D.C. in August! Visit STUART’S BAR, HINTERLANDS.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 2:56 - The usual bullshit.2:57 - 36:23 - Look! Up in the air! It's a Granny Smith apple! It's Kermit! No, it's the GREEN LANTERN!36:24 - 40:20 - Final judgments40:21 - 52:55  - Flop House Movie Mailbag52:56 - 56:25 - We plug our LIVE EVENT.56:26 - 57:52 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Elliott is back from his brief sabbatical. Will the possible evil-doll-antics of The Boy make him regret it? Meanwhile Stuart makes people's days better with a choking hazard, Dan's bachelor lifestyle is depressing, and Elliott shares why he has the cleanest poop in town. Wikipedia synopsis for The Boy. Movies recommended in this episode Mistress America De Palma The Face of Another Fright Night

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 4:03 - A little discussion of Stuart's wedding and related matters.4:04 - 34:24 - Kevin James tries so hard, bless his giant heart.34:25 - 36:45 - Final judgments36:46 - 41:46 -  Business matters, discussion of the Flop House Wiki, and the wedding of Elliott's REAL best friend.41:47 - 55:09 - Flop House Movie Mailbag55:10 - 1:00:31 - The sad bastards recommend1:00:32 - 1:01:59 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Hallie rejoins us, while Elliott is briefly away, to determine whether any tears were jerked by the Nicholas Sparks tearjerker, The Choice. Meanwhile Stuart reveals the Hamburglar's m-o, Dan discusses the strange things he's slept on, and Hallie explains the romantic troubles of dating someone on the metric system. Movies recommended in this episode Mr. Arkadin Entertainment Cross of Iron

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0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme.0:35 - 6:43 - We introduce our guest host, Hallie Haglund -- Daily Show writer, Dan-and-Elliott friend, and Elliott's office-mate --who regales us with embarrassing KalanTales.6:44 - 42:50 - Kevin James tries so hard, bless his giant heart.42:51 - 46:00 - Final judgments46:01 - 58:37 - Flop House Movie Mailbag58:38 - 1:02:57 - The sad bastards recommend1:02:58 - 1:04:40 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Live from Cake Shop as part of NYC Podfest. It's Gods of Egypt.

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On this episode we discuss the should-be-more-hateable tale of young aspiring DJ douches We Are Your Friends. Meanwhile, Elliott describes a Golden Girls party at length, Stuart burns Broadway, and Dan slowly dies. Apologies for the wonky audio. Due to his cold, Dan may have made a recording mistake with the microphones. Movies recommended in this episode: In the Blood Krampus Captain America: Civil War The 13th Warrior Portrait of Jason

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This episode is part three in a podcrawl with the guys at Read it and Weep, and at Too Beautiful to Live, covering the entire Look Who's Talking trilogy. We got to handle the thrilling conclusion, Look Who's Talking Now. Meanwhile we discover what's in the file titled "Things Stuart Knows," Dan reveals his shameful Simpsons past, and Elliott pitches "Fiddler on the Wolf Goes West." Movies recommended in this episode: Ricki and the Flash The Invitation China 9, Liberty 37

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With the glamour and horror of our 200th/MaxFun Drive episode behind us, we return to meat-and-potatoes flophousery with the little seen sci-fi actioner Vice, starring Flop House repeat offenders Thomas Jane and Bruce Willis. Meanwhile, Elliott explains the risks of marrying Shannon Tweed, Dan takes a fantasy trip to the set of the sitcom Wings, and Stuart makes a shocking leap ahead in Radio Zork Movies recommended in this episode: Green Room10 Cloverfield LaneThe Forbidden Room

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It's the moment we promised would never happen: we watched Elliott and Dan's stated least-favorite movie of all time, Nothing but Trouble. (Don't worry - despite Elliott's joking claim that if we ever did this film it would be our last, this is NOT our final episode). And to help us out with this special MAX FUN DRIVE episode (donate!), we welcome self-proclaimed minor television celebrity, Mr. John Hodgman. Meanwhile, Elliott breaks out his "Jane Campion accent, Stuart reveals his popcorn secrets, And Hodgman joins in at making fun of Dan's pronunciation. Movies recommended in this episode: The StingWitchtrapBroadcast NewsThe Housemaid

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Just in time for MaxFun Drive, a little bonus for listeners.

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Don't worry -- we took your boring story about a magical rock-star-making computer and turned it into a thrilling story about YouTube. We talk Jem and the Holograms. Meanwhile, Elliott has a surprisingly deep knowledge of failed Internet concerns, Stuart reveals the hidden bonds between Seal and Salman Rushdie, and Dan is totally blazed. Movies recommended in this episode: Slow WestMiller's CrossingCria Cuervos

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It's the Jewish magical realism tale that almost made Elliott hate his own Judaism: The Cobbler. Meanwhile, Stuart suffers from cartoon eye degeneration, Dan would like you to know very much that he's a wealthy murderer, and Elliott's singing has started to  bleed dangerously outside the letters section. Movies recommended in this episode: The Deer Hunter The Witch Chi-Raq

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Is Seventh Son seventh fun? Perhaps, though we're not sure what "seventh fun" means. Meanwhile, Elliott pitches us on FXXX, Stuart expresses his love for fantasy bullshit maps, and Dan feels terrible about mixing up En Vogue and TLC. We also debut Jonathan Biegen's "That's How it Works (feat. The Flop House)." And a warning for sensitive listeners -- we briefly get serious during the letters section with some talk about suicide. Movies recommended in this episode: Close RangeDiary of a Teenage GirlMiddle of Nowhere

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Will Cameron Crowe ever rebound from his Elizabethtown slump? Probably not with the even-worse Aloha. Meanwhile, Dan calls out famed painter Leonardo Da Vinci, Elliott can't remember the rich Bazooka Joe cast of characters, and Stu engages in something that's definitely a bit. Movies recommended in this episode: It's Such a Beautiful DaySicarioClass of 1984

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If you're a new listener, here's a good place to start!

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It's a super-sized, super-fun, super-technical-glitch-filled CONTEST WINNER SELECTION EPISODE! Tom Horstmann requested that we watch the 1986's The Golden Child, AKA "Don't worry about rewriting the screenplay; Eddie Murphy can improvise any action movie into a comedy!" Meanwhile Stuart uncovers the racist motives of the BK Kids Club, Elliott takes down beloved dead comedian Bill Hicks, and Dan advocates the Morvern style of menswear. Movies recommended in this episode: Man UpThe Hateful EightComing to America

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For this year's Cagemas we honor both the kindly St. Nicholas Cage, and Star Wars by picking the Cage-Hayden Christiansen joint, Outcast. Meanwhile, Stuart does an ad for Clearasil, Elliott contributes his worst Popeye, and, yet again, Stu and Elliott interrupt Dan when he's trying to do something nice for other people. Merry Cagemas. Special Cagemas and Cagenuka themes courtesy of Jonathan Biegen. Movies recommended in this episode: The Big Short Magic Mike XXL Bone Tomahawk

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On this episode we uncharacteristically talk sports, specifically futbol, as we watched the definitely-not-about-a-corrupt-organization FIFA film, United Passions. And who better to join us as we wade into these unfamiliar waters than sports expert and Flop House nemesis, David Kalan.  Elliott introduces us to the American Bean Council mascot, Stuart coins an all-new word, Dan instructs you on sportsball Fisher Stevens cosplay, and David tells us a fascinating story about Executive Decision. Movies recommended in this episode: Shaolin SoccerSteve JobsThe Battered Bastards of BaseballBeasts of No NationSicarioBeau Geste

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Remember when Chappie fever swept the country, with all those pet Chappies, and tickle-me-Chappies? Meanwhile, Elliott describes a literary-technique-based dystopian future, Stuart continues to explain the Internet, and Dan just checks out for a while. Like, he totally doesn't talk for seven minutes or something. Sorry, it was a long week. Movies recommended in this episode: Dead or AliveDrunk, Stoned, Brilliant, DeadWifePremonition Following an Evil Deed

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Think you're too good for the Oxford comma, Men, Women & Children? WELL WE'RE TOO GOOD FOR YOU. Meanwhile Stu explains "X-Men nudity," Dan makes a call for an annotated Flop House, and Elliott explains the music your kids' kids are gonna love. Oh, and also there's a BIG ANNOUNCEMENT. Movies recommended in this episode: SpectreGrandmaThe Ipcress FileRazorback

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Every Shocktober must come, sadly, to an end, but not without our longest (and best?) episode of the month. Dan Macabre, Booart Skellington, and Elliott Killin' are joined by Hellie Haglund to discuss "Ouija," the movie that captures the thrill of moving a piece of wood across a board. Meanwhile Stuart discovers the double-meaning to House II, Dan expands his masterful celebrity impression repertoire, which turns the tables on interrupting Elliott, and Hallie insists that Ingmar Bergman was a breast man.Movies recommended in this episode:SecondsCreepMy Best FiendGinza CosmeticsThanks for all the inquiries about the health of Lulu, Dan's cat. Unfortunately, he and Sarah had to put her to sleep after 12 love-filled years. Her suffering is over, and now she's sniffing Hallie's boots in heaven. We miss her.

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No show notes because Dan is busy nursing a sick cat.

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As part of the MaxFun Great Switcheroo, Justin, Travis, Griffin, and Merle McElroy of The Adventure Zone have taken on Leprechaun: Origins. Meanwhile, if you want to hear the Original Peaches (plus guest star Zhubin Parang) you can find them playing D&D over at The Adventure Zone!

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It's the most magical time of the year! SHOCKTOBER! And this year we're kicking off with the millenials-on-a-computer-screen shocker "Unfriended." Meanwhile, Dan reads movie ad copy, Elliott talks Quidditch injuries, and Stuart reveals his poop fears.Movies recommended in this episode:The VisitThe Leopard ManThe Late Show

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No show notes on account of Emmys.

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Straight from Cannes to Lifetime (TM), it's the Grace Kelly biopic, Grace of Monaco. Meanwhile Elliott has a surprisingly deep well of Saved by the Bell knowledge, Dan speculates about Curly's gold, and Stuart finds a new way to leave Dan out of things.Movies recommended in this episode:The DropProject NimObvious Child

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Some of the top bits and tangents from the first 75 episodes, suggested by fans. Apologies for the sound quality on some of these -- it was early on and we were learning.

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Show notes canceled on account of SUMMER.

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In this episode, Jordan Morris of terrific MaxFun sister podcast Jordan, Jesse, Go! stops by to co-host while Elliott's in England, a move he immediately regretted when we watched Strange Magic. Meanwhile, Dan explains the proper way to drink beer, Stuart evinces his disdain for improv, and Jordan displays his surprisingly deep knowledge of Three Ninjas. Movies recommended in this episode:The Super CopsThe OvernightResults

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Will the guys who liked Speed Racer also enjoy the Wachowski sibling's most recent critical flop, Jupiter Ascending? Meanwhile Elliott debuts his new bumper sticker, Dan boringly digresses about The Three Investigators, and Stuart explains why, when incarcerating someone, you should really take their rocket boots.Movies recommended in this episode:CreepFlash GordonBarbarellaThe Visitor

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Detailed show notes abandoned this week, as Dan and Elliott are winging their way to Montreal for a wedding!

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Hoo boy does Johnny Depp certainly have a mustache in Mortdcai!  Meanwhile Dan reads copy off a beer for some reason, Elliott invites George Lucas to stop by, and Stuart recommends a surprising film.Movies recommended in this episode:Mad Max: Fury RoadNeed for SpeedStuart Wellington mystery recommendation

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Show notes/timecode delayed on account of busy weekend.

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In the words of Homer Simpson, we've got a hankerin' for some spankerin', as we discuss 50 Shades of Grey.  Meanwhile Stuart delivers a eulogy for the rappin' granny, Elliott explains the laziness of British elocution, Dan reveals a porn tale from his past, and we include perhaps our best outtakes ever.Movies recommended in this episode:What We Do in the ShadowsLucyDownhill Racer

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0:00 - 0:37 - Introduction and theme.0:38 - 4:10 - We introduce our guest, Tom Silvestro, and gripe more about our ongoing technical problems.4:11 - 27:58 - Should you let this Priest touch you?27:59 - 31:40 - Some special SHOCKTOBER final judgments31:41 - 40:29 - Flop House Movie Mailbag40:30 - 53:39 - The sad bastards recommend53:38 - 55:27 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme.0:35 - 6:43 - The technical difficulties saga continues.6:44 - 30:01 - You'd think there would be a lot to talk about in a three hour film, wouldn't you? You would be wrong.30:02 - 35:30 - Final judgments35:31 - 51:52 - Flop House Movie Mailbag51:53 - 56:20 - The sad bastards recommend56:20 - 57:32 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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We've seen him 3D, but are we ready for Dracula: Untold? Meanwhile Stuart demonstrates his innovative mixology, and Elliot and Dan reveal the surprising Dracula-centric details of the Mad Men finale.Movies recommended in this episode:Donnie BrascoSpringDracula: Pages from a Virgin's Diary

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0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme.0:35 - 4:17 - We discuss our recent technical difficulties.4:18 - 27:57 - You'd think there would be a lot to talk about in a three hour film, wouldn't you? You would be wrong.27:58 - 33:00 - We summarily dispense with final judgments, to discuss Stuart's SURPRISE GIFT to Dan and Elliott33:31 - 47:45 - Flop House Movie Mailbag47:46 - 54:44 - The sad bastards recommend / plug.54:45 - 55:52 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Just bloopin' around.

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It's the moment that the bad movie cognoscenti have been waiting for, as we discuss The Boy Next Door. Meanwhile, Stuart explains the "character" he plays, Dan becomes a proponent of the female gaze, and Elliott describes some of the lesser-known sexually explicit Disney cartoons of the 60's.Movies recommended in this episode:CitizenfourFaultsIt Follows

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0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme.0:35 - 2:23 - Elliott's public airing of grievances.2:24 - 39:26 - We find a surprising amount to say about the wish-fulfillment fantasy, Limitless.39:27 - 41:30 - Final judgments.41:31 - 58:07 - Flop House Movie Mailbag58:08 - 59:13 - A speed round of the sad bastards recommend59:14 - 1:00:21 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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It's the MaxFun drive! And, though Stu is in Puerto Rico, we pulled out the big guns with a return appearance by Hallie Haglund! She adds some much needed perspective to the asshole-dude-based RomCommery of That Awkward Moment. Meanwhile Elliott reveals his hatred of smooth men who have a lot of sex, Dan is, yet again, accused of racism, and Hallie can't get over the similarity between our lead actress and farts.Movies recommended in this episode:Cold in JulyAll Good ThingsMan is Not a Bird

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 5:28 - Tales of Cobra Commander and Twin Sitters5:29 - 32:05 - Zach Snyder somehow finds a way to ruin sexy schoolgirls fighting robotic samurais. 33:37 - 35:32 - Final judgments.35:33 - 50:59 - Flop House Movie Mailbag51:00 - 58:00 - The sad bastards recommend58:01 - 58:43 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 5:48 - We discuss our GLOWING Onion AV Club mention.5:49 - 33:34 - Nothing starts a franchise better than a movie clearly only designed to start a franchise.  Case in point: I Am Number Four.33:37 - 35:10 - Final judgments.35:11 - 51:09 - Flop House Movie Mailbag, complete with exhuastingly-long theme.51:10 - 57:17 - The sad bastards recommend57:18 - 58:45 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Turns out that being Christopher Nolan's cinematographer is not the same thing as being Christopher Nolan, as we found out when we endured Transcendence. Meanwhile Elliott explains Dan's unusual way of reading, Stuart has a Transmorphers flashback, and Dan sings a little cow opera. Movies recommended in this episode:The Evil ClergymanThe Woman on the BeachSunshine

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0:00 - 0:38 - Introduction and theme.0:39 - 31:15- We officially turn this bad movie podcast into a Nic Cagecast, with our discussion of Drive Angry.31:16 - 33:36 - Final judgments.33:35 - 48:15 - Flop House Movie Mailbag48:16 - 52:45 - The sad bastards recommend52:46 - 53:53 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:41 - Introduction and theme.0:42 - 8:29 - Stuart helps Dan deliver some big news by setting up a bit at length and then seeming totally uninterested in the payoff.8:30 - 29:35 - We seem to have less to say about The Roommate than any prior film.29:36 - 35:22 - Final judgments.35:23 - 54:01 - Recommendations are BUMPED for our longest Movie Mailbag yet.54:02 - 58:40 - The sad bastards recommend58:41 - 59:51 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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There's just something about a terrible kids' movie that brings out the best (?) in us, so we dive headfirst into the CGI flop Legends of OZ: Dorothy's Return. Meanwhile, Stuart gives important advice to our kidnapped listeners, Dan inadvertently pitches the new hit movie "Uncatchable," and Bizzarro Elliott makes an appearance. Movies and TV recommended in this episode: SorcererWildLogan's Run

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Flop House repeat offender Idris Elba romances Taraji P. Henson in the Valentine's Day favorite No Good Deed. Wait, did we say "romances?" We meant "terrorizes." Meanwhile Elliott tells us of James Bond films of the future, Dan tries to play a game of Radio Zork, and Stuart introduces the new Sweet Amazing Candy Penis.Movies recommended in this episode:RomaHappy ChristmasCoherence

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The gang had to take the week off, but Matt Carman and Kseniya Yarosh from the zine "I Love Bad Movies" (ilovebadmovies.com) are here to tell you about an exciting LIVE FLOP HOUSE EVENT, that the floppers are preparing in partnership with the I Love Bad Movies team. http://bit.ly/je68Vc

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0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme.0:35 - 5:56 - The usual gang takes a few moments to reacquaint themselves, after a month of guest hosts, and begin unintentionally insulting everyone.5:57 - 35:45 - If you're gonna make a not-so-great movie, do everyone a favor and stick Nicholas Cage and Alfred Molina in it.35:45 - 39:00 - Final judgments.48:31 - 55:35 - Recommendations are BUMPED for our longest Movie Mailbag yet.55:36 - 57:42 The final letter segues into thrilling news of our first LIVE FLOP HOUSE EVENT!57:43 - 59:08 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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We will never watch anything with nearly three hour bloat again, so enjoy the special snowflake that is us talking about the most recent Bayhem, Transformers: Age of Extinction. Meanwhile, Elliott explains how to find a Transformer's clitoris, Stuart keeps on Castle Freakin' on, and sleepy Dan (sort of) returns.Movies recommended in this episode:Winter LightZRock N Roll Nightmare

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 6:57 - We're so delighted by our special MYSTERY GUEST (whose identity is ruined in the show description) that we take even longer than usual to get to the point.6:58 - 47:29 - In-between discussions of Batman villains, we find a little time to talk about Knight and Day.47:30 - 48:30 - Final judgments.48:31 - 54:50 - The sad bastards recommend. 54:51 - 56:34 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Recorded on 1/9/2015 in front of a live, sold out crowd in The Bell House in Gowanus, Brooklyn. A huge thanks to Mr. Matt Carman (1/2 of the excellent zine "I Love Bad Movies") for recording the show and making sure we sound as good as we do.

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0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme.0:35 - 4:28 - We introduce guest host Andy Rocco, and challenge him to justify himself.4:29 - 47:22 - We find a surprising amount to talk about in Gooby, almost managing to keep to the topic.47:23 - 50:06 - Final judgments.50:07 - 55:57 - The sad bastards recommend. 57:58 - 58:57 - Plugs, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 30:55 - We discuss the Battle: Los Angeles prequel, Skyline.  What, it's not a prequel?30:56 - 34:20 - Final judgments.34:21 - 53:05 - Donations and Flop House Movie Mailbag53:06 - 56:27 - The sad bastards recommend. 56:28 - 57:26 - Plugs, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Merry Cagemas everyone! The store was all out of Left Behind (well... it hasn't been released to video or streaming yet), so we got you a Rage. We hope you're not too disappointed. Meanwhile Elliott reads the Looney Tunes dinner specials, Dan reveals the medical source of his word-slurring, and Stuart just can't stop chewing. Movies recommended in this episode:NightcrawlerFoxcatcherFor a Few Dollars More9 Deaths of the Ninja

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0:00 - 0:53 - Red carpet introduction0:54 - 35:51 - In contrast to EVERYONE ON THE INTERNET and our usual tendency to hate on things, we actually didn't mind the Oscars. 35:52 - 45:25 - Flop House Movie Mailbag45:26 - 48:20- A brief pledge drive48:21 - 55:56 - Dan tells the greatest story in American letters. Suck it, Twain and Hemmingway.55:57 - 59:47 - Plugs, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Song of the autumn contest winner Jason MacIssac decreed that we should be subjected to legendary season-one-of-American-Idol ancillary flop From Justin to Kelly. Did he take it easy on us, or is there now a bounty on his head? Meanwhile Stuart introduces his innovative new restaurant concept, and Elliott murders Dan on air.  Movies recommended in this episode:Inherent ViceThe Hobbit: Battle of the Five ArmiesNine Days of One Year

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p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; line-height: 20.0px; font: 13.0px 'Trebuchet MS'; color: #cccccc} 0:00 - 0:35 - Introduction and theme 0:36 - 33:09 - We spend a little time discussing Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time and way too much time discussing Duckberg and its inhabitants.   33:10 - 36:53- Final judgments 36:54 - 53:14 - A super-sized Movie Mail Bag, including some Oscar talk 53:15 - 58:29- The sad bastards recommend  58:30 - 59:41 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

Go to www.flophousepodcast.com and click on our shiny new donate button to support the show.

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0:00 - 0:39 - SEXY Introduction and theme0:40 - 3:27 - We work ourselves up into discussing the movie with some of our usual gibberish.0:28 - 36:41- Cuddle up tight with your loved one and share your most romantic pair of earbuds for this discussion of Valentine's Day.36:42 - 39:37- Final judgments39:38 - 52:41 - An epic Flop House Movie Mailbag52:42 - 57:33- The sad bastards recommend 57:34 - 59:25 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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A returning Flop House director guides a cast of returning Flop House stars in an eruption of mediocrity named Pompeii. Meanwhile Stu asks a provocative question about Cenobites, Elliott reveals an early draft of a Robert Louis Stevenson classic, and Dan debuts his new hit character. Movies recommended in this episode:VolcanoHouseboundThe HurricaneThe Chant of Jimmie Blacksmith

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme0:33 - 36:30- Sure M. Night Shyamalan makes amazing Flop House movies as a director and as a writer, but can he bring that same anti-magic as a producer?36:31 - 38:18- Final judgments38:19 - 39:25 - Pause for station identification39:26 - 44:55 - The Flop House Movie Mailbag44:56 - 51:02- The sad bastards recommend (Including a very special fantasy recommendation)51:03 - 54:38 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 4:00 - We re-introduce guest host Lou Fernandez of Lou Reads the Internet for You.4:01 - 34:20 - We talk about the Kutcher-Heigel collaboration that America's 12-year-olds were clamoring for.34:21 - 36:35 - Final judgments40:07 - 47:45 - We expand our flop purview to include The Great White Way, as Lou relates his experience seeing Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark47:46 - 56:42 - The sad bastards recommend. 56:43 - 58:07 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Detailed show notes canceled on account of Dan being sick with Mongolian death flu. Movies recommended in this episode:The Woman ChaserShort Term 12Phase IVJohn Wick

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0:00 - 0:31 - Introduction and theme.0:32 - 33:37 - How much air could an airbender bend if an airbender could bend air? The answer is surprisingly dull.33:38- 40:06 - Some highly digressive final judgments40:07 - 54:58 - The Flop House Movie Mailbag54:59 - 58:46 - The sad bastards recommend. 58:47 - 59:26 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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What the Hex?

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Thus  we enter November, the month known for having "No" theme. And, appropriately, we watched one of the most generic of modern action sequels, 300: Rise of an Empire. Meanwhile, Elliott lectures on Noid avoidance, Dan makes a public apology relating to one type of music and attacks another, and Stu makes an exciting announcement for enjoyers of comical books.

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 4:15 - We kill a little time needling Elliott and remembering Dino de Laurentiis.4:16 - 29:36 - Fuckin' movies, how do they work?29:37- 33:16 - Final judgments33:17 - 39:27 - The sad bastards recommend. 39:28 - 47:13 - Instead of cutting our losses, we waste even more time.47:14 - 48:04 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; line-height: 20.0px; font: 13.0px 'Trebuchet MS'; color: #010101} 0:00 - 0:35 - Introduction and SHOCKTOBER theme. 0:36 - 6:17 - Your regular co-hosts waste six minutes talking about how nice it is to all be in the same room again. 6:18 - 32:15 - We are all giddy, GIDDY, to be watching Teen Witch -- a classic bad movie -- rather than the usual modern, sub-mediocre Hollywood crap. 32:16- 37:15- Final judgments 37:16 - 49:44 Flop House Mailbag 49:45 - 54:39- The sad bastards recommend. 54:40 - 56:09 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Shocktober continues/ends with Dario Argento totally forgetting everything he knew about filmmaking (and we don't even like him that much) with Dracula 3D. Meanwhile, Dan reveals the alternate, director's cut ending to Escape (The Pina Colada Song), Elliott out-pervs the pervazoid with his demands for more nudity, and Stuart once again astounds with his facility for accents. Movies recommended in this episode:Shadow of the VampireDuelThe Hitcher

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0:00 - 0:39 - Introduction and SHOCKTOBER theme.0:40 - 35:46 - Turns out "The Uninvited" isn't a horror movie about an angry guest who didn't get invited to Elliott's wedding.  Instead, it's about ghosts or crazy people, or some shit.35:47- 39:13- Final judgments39:14 - 45:44- The sad bastards recommend. 45:45 - 46:39 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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BOOOOOGENS! Welcome to the first episode of SHOCKTOBER 2014 (and the first episode officially under our new podcast network, MaxFun). And because we would never Halloween trick you, instead we're treating you to a guest appearance by Hallie Haglund, sitting in with the OP's, to discuss The Quiet Ones. Meanwhile, Elliott lists all the great MaxFun podcasts, Stuart once again shows his ignorance of all things Internet, and Hallie puts Dan in his place. Movies and TV recommended in this episode: From BeyondThe ReturnedWitchboardThe Hidden

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0:00 - 0:37 - Introduction and SHOCKTOBER theme.0:38 - 8:47 - We spend nearly ten minutes introducing our special guest Federico Hatoum, and explaining why we've been M.I.A. for over a month.8:48 - 28:49 - We talk about Blood: The Last Vampire. .. or, more accurately, "CG Blood: The Last Vampire."29:50- 34:36- Final judgments34:37 - 47:54 - PLUGS! which eventually devolve into a series of mouth-sounds.47:55 - 58:52- The sad bastards recommend. 58:53 - 1:00:12 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 6:13 - So much talk about weddings that you'd think you were listening to three schoolgirls, if not for the World of Warcraft reference.6:14 - 42:05 - A scintillating discussion of Old Dogs, the family film that's fun for no ages, as well as our longest, most absurd digression yet.42:06 - 43:03- Final judgments are handily dispensed with.43:04 - 48:17 - Dan manages to announce our CONTEST WINNER, despite Elliott and Stu's best efforts to not let him get the name out.48:18 - 55:45 - The sad bastards recommend. 55:46 - 58:24 - Plugs, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Smalltember continues with perhaps the smallest movie we've ever covered, the bad movie new classic "A Talking Cat!?!" Meanwhile Stuart entertains the lizard representative of Harlem, Elliott gives helpful mnemonic devices for the major German directors, and Dan does some research into the pervy past of the movie's creative team. Movies recommended in this episode:Intimate LightingThe GuestEnemy

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The OP's are all back in action, celebrating the all-NEW made-up holiday of "Smallvember." First up, the Christsploitation film "God's Not Dead" filled with the straw-manniest straw men outside of a county fair.  Meanwhile Elliott and Detective Columbo disprove the flat Earth theory, Stuart reveals a surprising knowledge of the Christian rock genre, and Dan announces a new contest! Movies recommended in this episode:Jodorowsky's DuneThe Last of SheilaThe One I Love

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 27:35 - Jude Law and Forrest Whittaker repossess both our will to live and to discuss the movie Repo Men.27:36 - 33:19 - Final judgments, and Elliott rambling Lethal Weapon 2 digression.33:20 - 49:04 - A brimming Flop House Movie Mailbag.49:05 - 58:50 - Instead of recommendations, Elliott gives us a firsthand report on San Diego's ComiCon.58:51 - 59:41 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:16 - Introduction and theme 0:17 - 34:17 - Luc Besson is usually good for some dumb thrills.  Take away the thrills, and you have From Paris With Love. 34:18 - 36:55 - Final judgments 36:56 - 41:30 - Friendly's with benefits. 41:31 - 45:19 - NEW CONTEST ALERT 45:20 - 55:03 - The sad bastards recommend. 55:04- 55:54 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Thanks to his series of enraged tweets on the matter, we invited comedy writer and pop culture expert Kevin Maher on the show to discuss the enragingly anthropomorphized Walking with Dinosaurs. Meanwhile Dan pervazoids up the Crypt Keeper, Kevin unleashes his dad rage, and Stuart yet again shows his understanding of America's youth.Movies recommended in this episode:Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007)Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (1982)Into the Woods (American Playhouse, 1991)Drinking BuddiesCloudy with a Chance of Meatballs

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0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme0:35 - 40:51 - God has decided to punish us. Not by sending all of the angels from heaven to wipe out humanity - by making us watch Legion.  (And punish Dan in particular by making Stu and Elliott interrupt him more than ever before.)40:52 - 42:14 - Final judgments42:15 - 57:47 - The Flop House Movie Mailbag threatens to take over the show.57:48 - 59:21 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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No movie has sexualized pastry so much since American Pie, yet somehow Labor Day is even less erotic than Jason Biggs balls-deep in apple filling. Meanwhile Stuart does some brilliant voice work, Dan loves the versatility of DVDs, and Elliott regales the world with Tales of Ruck.Movies recommended in this episode:The Crazies (1973)The Crazies (2010)Edge of TomorrowAlan Partridge

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme0:33 - 34:34 - Chicks and ducks and geese better scurry, when we take you out in our discussion of Surrogates.34:35 - 37:20 - Final judgments38:21 - 45:55 - The Flop House Movie Mailbag.45:56 - 51:40- The sad bastards recommend.51:41 - 54:25 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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With audiences primed to be disappointed by a new Hercules movie in theaters, why not be like the Peaches and be disappointed by The Legend of Hercules in the comfort of your own home. Meanwhile Elliott tells us the secrets of the ancient Greek hamburger, Dan has uncanny recall for old Disney cartoons, and Stuart tells sad tales of British totty.Movies recommended in this episode:SnowpiercerThe Lego MovieThe Hunger Games: Catching Fire12 Years a SlaveMuppets Most Wanted Jack Ryan: Shadow RecruitDogtoothZ

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0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme0:35 - 2:30 - We reintroduce special guest host Brock Mahan.2:31 - 36:53 - We put on our critics' high-heeled red leather books to take on the no-rom, no-com, rom-com All About Steve40:56 - 40:55 - Final judgments40:56 - 44:07 - An all-comments Flop House mailbag.48:45 - 55:07- The sad bastards recommend.55:08 - 57:53 - Plugs, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Producer Luc Besson and director McG made a bet about the number of tones they could cram into 3 Days to Kill, and the audience lost. Meanwhile Elliott does his classic "2000 Year-Old Killer" routine, Dan gets more inappropriately sexual than ever before, Stu introduces the concept of a "neck baby," and TVs Jessica Williams stops by, because why the heck not?Movies recommended in this episode:The LimeyThey Came TogetherObvious ChildThe Sea Wolf

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme0:34 - 2:24 - We waste a few minutes talking about how long it's been since we've invaded your ear-holes.2:25 - 35:39 - We discuss Law Abiding Citizen, the most egregious movie title crime against hyphens since The 40 Year Old Virgin.35:39 - 38:18 - Final judgments38:20 - 39:25 - Station identification39:26 - 44:07 - We attempt to re-create a Flop House Movie Mailbag from memory, and we make fun of Stuart's fragile mental state.44:08 - 52:10- The sad bastards recommend.52:11 - 53:01 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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We discuss Last Vegas, which is, of course, a documentary from the far future about the time the elderly Original Peaches and friend went to Las Vegas. Meanwhile Dan unveils his totally original, copyrighted concept, Elliott reveals how he does creep research, and Stu pulls out a letters surprise.Movies recommended in this episode:Stop Making SenseLolaStakeland

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Yes, Elliott, it should be called I, Frankenstein's Monster, but that doesn't change the fact that we watched I, Frankenstein. Meanwhile Elliott reveals the secret sex fetishes of Archie Comics characters, we learn Stuart's nicknames, and Dan asks the big metaphysical questions.Movies recommended in this episode:The GrannyThe Wages of FearDeceptive Practice: The Mysteries and Mentors of Ricky JayWhat's the Matter With Helen?

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0:00 - 0:36 - Introduction and theme0:37 - 8:10 - Before getting down to business we discuss Stuart's vacation, Dan's nasal surgery, and the acting career of guest host Eric Zuckerman.8:11 - 39:48 - We talk about Sorority Row, the remake of House on Sorority Row, which, of course, was a remake of Erich Von Stroheim's Greed, based on the novel Push, by Sapphire.39:49 - 44:17 - Final judgments44:18 - 52:00 - Flop House Movie Mailbag52:01 - 59:14 - The sad bastards recommend.59:15 - 59:53 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Despite being one of the more nothing movies we've ever watched, we somehow crap out what we believe to be our longest episode with G.I. Joe: Retaliation. It's a living. Meanwhile, Dan and Elliott explain what "G.I. Joe" means, and develop President Ziggy, and Stuart reveals he's an evil land developer.Movies recommended in this episode:Raising CainVideodromeDeath Rides a Horse

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0:00 - 0:31 - Introduction and theme0:31 - 5:00 - We reintroduce guest co-host Amanda Melson, and spend nearly five full minutes reminiscing about the New York comedy scene in a way that's almost completely alienating to outsiders. 5:01 - 39:12 - You know your movie's in trouble when even an ice ax-wielding killer and Kate Beckinsale in her underwear can't generate any excitement39:13 - 43:10 - Final judgments43:11 - 48:00 - Flop House Movie Mailbag48:01 - 53:48 - The sad bastards recommend.53:49 - 54:52 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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We discuss Easy Rider: The Ride Back, an object lesson in why you should never let a movie's sequel rights lapse. Meanwhile Dan explains the Flop House fan caste system, Elliott puts the "bar" in barter, and Stuart knows nothing about robots.Movies recommended in this episode:Blade IIThe EastMy Dinner With Andre

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TEN BEST PICTURE NOMINEES? HAS THE WORLD GONE MAD?!

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1980 was a simpler time, when you could put Clint Eastwood together with an orangutan, not bother to come up with a story, and release it as a major motion picture called Any Which Way but Loose (check out We Hate Movies doing the first film in the "Clint goes ape" series, Every Which Way but Loose HERE). Meanwhile Dan runs through several impeccable celebrity impressions, Elliott explains a rare sex act, and Stu discusses what orangutans did to get orangutan news before Google alerts.Movies recommended in this episode:Blue RuinI Saw the DevilShock Corridor

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0:00 - 0:30 - Introduction and theme 0:31 - 3:35 - Stuart wastes all of our time by discussing his upcoming 30th birthday. 3:36 - 34:25 - If your criteria for a romantic comedy is that it contains the words "the" and "truth," and has a negative descriptor in the middle, may we suggest The Awful Truth starring Cary Grant? 34:26 - 40:31 - Final judgments 40:32 - 50:00 - Flop House Movie Mailbag 50:01 - 51:14 - An explanation of the new Movie Minute policy. 51:15 - 56:31 - The sad bastards recommend. 56:32 - 58:30 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:36 - Introductions and Theme0:37 - 33:42- We welcome Matt Koff, our second guest host of a still-young 2010, and we introduce him to a rising star named Gerard Butler, in a little film called Gamer.33:43 - 37:57 - Final Judgments37:58 - 48:38- A very navel-gazing movie mailbag.38:39 - 51:47 - Two out of three  bastards recommending aint' bad.51:48 - 52:37 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Hey remember those DeNiro and Stallone boxing movies you loved? This is also... a movie. We talk about Grudge Match, the movie that pretends DeNiro has a chance against steroidal Stallone. Meanwhile Dan discusses Kevin Hart's need to do only Kevin-branded movies, Elliott uncovers Sean Connery's strange belief he's in every movie, and one of Stu's relatives makes an unexpected appearance. Movies recommended in this episode:The Set-UpUnder the SkinThe Raid 2

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0:00 - 0:34 - Introductions and Theme0:35 - 3:00 - We welcome Elliott back and, for some reason, Stuart wastes time quizzing him and Dan about current events.3:01 - 37:24 - We discuss Hannah Montana: The Movie, because surely the audience for that picture was white males in their late twenties to early thirties.37:25 - 40:27 - Final Judgments40:28 - 53:49- Our longest letters segment yet, resulting in one of our patented vague Flop House contests.53:50 - 56:49 - A very short sad bastards recommend.56:50 - 58:14 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Han Solo vs. Commissioner Gordon sounds awesome, until you realize the star of Paranoia is actually a Hemsworth brother. And not the good one. Meanwhile Elliott doubles down on the size of Gary Oldman's penis, Stuart disturbs us by talking about intimate times and Dan introduces the notion of a California Raisins fetish. A note: in this episode Dan confuses Baba Yaga with Strega Nona. Movies recommended in this episode:The Grand Budapest HotelThe VisitorThe Sweet Smell of Success

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0:00 - 0:36 - Introductions and Theme0:37 - 3:47 - We introduce our guest co-host, Nigel Wood.3:48 - 29:50 - We discuss 90 minutes of bright colors, loud noises, and disconnected action, in a DVD mislabeled "Dragonball: Evolution."29:51 - 33:23 - Final Judgments33:24 - 34:30 - Station identification34:31 - 41:46 - The sad bastards recommend.45:47 - 45:02 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Uh, one question, boss: Doesn't Gangster Squad kind of sound like WE'RE the Gangsters?We return to a big, old-fashioned Hollywood flop with Gangster Squad, the movie that takes a bunch of good actors and a promising director and churns out a film thats absurd and deadly dull by turns. Meanwhile Elliott gives Hoagie Carmichael gift advice, Stuart comes out for cast awareness, and Dan is tired and really doesn't keep up his end of the co-hosting duties. This episode brought to you by the letter "H."Movies recommended in this episode:The Roaring TwentiesThe Friends of Eddie CoyleManhunterGrand Piano

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We answer another letter from a loyal listener.

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The solution to "Devil's Kidney Stone." In which Dan makes the mistake of thinking that, because Renny Harlin directed Devil's Pass, it would be crazy and weird, rather than draggy and significantly more boring than reading the Wikipedia page about the real Dyatlov Pass incident. Then, we forgo letters and recommendations to offer a condensed version of our usual Awards Floptacular, because no one (including us) really cared much about the Awards Floptacular anyway.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introductions and Theme0:33 - 1:37 - We introduce our special guest, Flop House contest winner Dash.1:38 - 43:35 - As four comic book nerds, we find far too much to say about X-Men Origins: Wolverine.43:46 - 45:55 - Final Judgments45:56 - 51:55 - The sad bastards recommend.51:56 - 54:19 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Our most self-indulgent movie minute yet!

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Sort of like MASH, but not about the army and terrible.Consider our debt to "He's the Housecat (Arthur's Theme)" music video contest winner Dan Costales paid in full! Was it worth it Dan? Was if worth the pain you caused, making us watch the pre-Oscar Halle Berry racist stereotype comedy "BAPS?" Meanwhile Elliott continually implies Martin Landau is a vampire, Stuart reveals how all males are sexually threatened by him, and Dan suggests that the Crypt Keeper should've come up with a better BAP*S twist. Movies recommended in this episode:The LEGO MovieBeauty is Embarrassing The Sea WolfThe Professionals

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0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme0:35 - 3:40 - We devote a little time to patting ourselves on the back for reaching fifty episodes.3:41 - 28:51 - We celebrate our fiftieth anniversary by discussing Delgo, the movie most likely to inspire blank stares in our audience, followed by "What the fuck's a Delgo?."  Maybe we'll get it together for our 100th.  28:51 - 29:58 - Pause for station identification29:59 - 35:55 - Final judgments 35:56 - 40:40 - Flop House Movie Mailbag, plus discussion of a wacky cross-country adventure.40:41 - 47:40 - The sad bastards recommend.  47:41 - 49:19 - Goodbyes, theme and outtakes.

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Ryan Reynolds' abs are RIPD like lettuce. We ease Elliott back into the Flop House groove with a movie right in our wheelhouse: the Men in Black/Ghostbusters-lite disaster R.I.P.D. Meanwhile Dan introduces the concept of ghost hats, Elliott uses the new recording space for its foley possibilities, Stu rails against shark-drummer racism, and the whole gang does their impeccable Boston accents.Movies recommended in this episode:Who's That Knocking at My DoorSudden DeathRay Harryhausen: Special Effects TitanCaptain Phillips

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Who doesn't love trailers and shaggy dog puns?

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It's the Flop House crew vs. the Dream Team in an all-out dance/bad movie fight to the finish, as we discuss Battle of the Year. Meanwhile, Stu challenges our missing co-host for synopsis supremacy, Dan discusses Vincent Van Gogh's battle with his own body, and Hallie drops the world's best rooster pun.

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0:00 - 0:37 - Introduction and theme0:38 - 39:10- We dive right in and discuss a movie based on a video game character that was only popular because preteen boys are too scared to talk to real girls - Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li.39:11 - 40:10 - Final judgments 40:11 - 41:33 - A CONTEST WINNER ANNOUNCED, for the contest everyone (even the hosts) forgot was happening.41:34 - 47:47 - The sad bastards recommend.  47:48 - 50:17 - Plugs, goodbyes, theme and outtakes.50:18 - 51:17 - Station identification.

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Go away, Getaway Hawkey Holidays to all the little Flop House boys and girls. Your present is the movie-length chase scene Getaway.  Meanwhile,  Dan takes on the liberal media, Stuart gives one of his patented Flop House asides, and Elliott reminds us all of Dorf's amazing performance in Don't Look Now.Movies recommended in this episode:The Hobbit: The Desolation of SmaugThe GetawayRoninThe Ballad of Cable HogueOur Town

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0:00 - 0:56 - Introduction, APOLOGY, and theme0:57 - 4:00 - The return of Dan's least favorite reoccurring segment.4:01 - 41:41- Dan, Stu, and Elliott make vicious fun of a movie you've never heard of, giving the lie to their claim that they're too nice to kick a film when it's down.41:42 - 44:53- Final judgments 44:54 - 51:54 - Our second and final SHOCKTOBER sad bastards recommend of 2009.  51:55 - 55:00 - Plugs, goodbyes, theme and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and SPOOKY theme0:35 - 2:27 - The usual off-topic nonsense up front.2:28 - 30:44- Finally, the pro-abortion, anti-holocaust, Jewish demon horror story you've been waiting for! The Unborn.30:45 - 34:04- Final judgments 34:05 - 39:29 - Movie Mailbag39:30 - 47:11 - A special SHOCKTOBER sad bastards recommend.  47:12 - 48:37 - Goodbyes, theme and outtakes.

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You can have my Christmas when you pry it from my cold dead hand. Hey, remember when we all used to celebrate Christmas? Last Ounce of Courage takes us back to that magical time.  Meanwhile,  Stu is upset at the way Wolverine treated his Christmas gift, Dan fails to have perspective about his knee, and Elliott reveals the Jesus/Ducktales crossover. Movies recommended in this episode:TargetsStokerMy Name is Nobody

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme0:34 - 4:14- We engage in a hilarious bit about how everyone spent last weekend.4:15 - 28:26- Race-baiting mixed with Fatal Attraction seems like a recipe for trashy film fun.  And yet, count the times that Dan sighs wearily, while discussing Obsessed.28:27 - 30:30- Final judgments 30:31 - 34:30 - Movie Mailbag34:31 - 39:24 - Inspired by the final letter, we segue directly into a special older "bad movie" edition of sad bastards recommend.39:25 - 43:37 - Which, in turn, devolves into a discussion of T&A comedies.43:38 - 46:15 - A plug from Elliott, goodbyes, theme and outtakes.

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JAYDEN WILL BE RECOGNIZED. It's the movie they tried to pretend M. Night Shyamalan had nothing to do with: After Earth.  Meanwhile,  Elliott introduces us to the Crypt Keeper's brother, Stuart meets his Phantasm hero, and Dan just needs to explain a few things first. Movies recommended in this episode:Bad MiloBlue is the Warmest Color99 River Street

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Two is the Cloneliest Number The three peaches spend this episode cloning around about Star Wars: Episode II: Attack of the Clones, as part of a podcrawl with Read it and Weep (who took on Episode I) and Proudly Resents (who will be taking on Episode III).  Meanwhile, Dan's space gaydar is misaligned, Elliott explains the proper way to steal a cake, and the greatest secrets of Stuart's nerdiness are revealed. Movies recommended in this episode:War WitchInside Llewyn DavisNightwatch

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A commercial for our new, more convenient web address.

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0:00 - 0:31 - Introduction and theme0:32 - 3:58- We introduce our guests, lycanthropy activists Ritch Duncan and Bob Powers.3:59 - 35:58 - What are "Skinwalkers?" Are they ancient legendary beasts?  Are they sufferers of a terrible curse? Are they nudists?  Or, perhaps they're just a way to tart up a lousy werewolf movie in Native American garb.35:59 - 41:51- Final judgments 41:52 - 48:21 - The sad bastards recommend.48:22 - 50:09 - Goodbyes, theme and outtakes.

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Simulates a real Foodfight, in that it leaves you pained, sticky, and wanting to vomit. Hey, you guys ever think to yourself, "I like Toy Story, but I wish it could be more commercial, ugly, and frenetic?" Welcome to Foodfight! Meanwhile, Dan points out the movie's one "goof," Stuart brings it back to "Just One of the Guys," and Elliott introduces his new "Southern Tin Tin Enthusiast" character. Movies recommended in this episode:GojiraThe Last UnicornWalker

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More letters from our loyal listeners.

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme0:34 - 33:52 - The original Peaches unearth a time capsule with a warning for all mankind: avoid Knowing.33:53 - 36:27- Final judgments 36:28 - 37:34 - A break for station identification.37:35 - 42:50 - The Flop House Movie Mailbag42:51 - 47:59 - The sad bastards recommend.48:00 - 49:17 - Goodbyes, theme and outtakes.

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Sequel to "The Binge" Hey guys, who do you think you're gonna murder during The Purge this year? Meanwhile, Dan argues for greater creativity in purge-crime, Elliott introduces "Spoiler Alert Rod Serling," and Stuart makes us all uncomfortable with his sudden surge in the perv ratings.Movies recommended in this episode:The Phantom of the OperaNight of the DemonsThe GrannyGravityMad Love

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0:00 - 0:37 - Introduction and theme0:38 - 5:20 - We spend some time discussing Stuart's penis and introduce our guest host, Meghan O'Neill.5:21 - 36:59 - How many lousy movies do two of the greatest actors of their generation have to make, before we give up on them?  Just one, if it's Righteous Kill.37:00 - 38:06- A break for station identification and all things Flop House.38:07 - 42:45 - Final judgments42:46 - 43:52 - We tease letters but cruelly do not read any this episode.43:53 - 51:27 - The sad bastards recommend.51:28 - 53:20 - Goodbyes, theme and outtakes.

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Really captures the boredom of waiting at the ATM. Thank you ATM for blowing the lid off the all-too-common crime of ATM serial killing. Meanwhile, Stuart discovers the concept of the spoiler alert, and Elliott and Dan trade impressions of one of the most oft-imitated voices in Hollywood usurping the signature role of another most-imitated-voice in Hollywood.Movies recommended in this episode:BelowAmerican MaryPersonaIn the Mouth of Madness

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The Flop House gets just as lazy in August as anyone else, so while we're on vacation, please enjoy this rerun of our most popular movie minute.

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Help, Olympus Has Fallen, and it can't get up! (No detailed notes this week, because 2/3 of the Original Peaches are in Los Angeles this weekend, including the one who writes the show notes and really should be packing RIGHT NOW.)

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0:00 - 0:30 - Introduction and theme0:31 - 3:09 - We introduce our guest host, Brock Mahan.3:10 - 30:55 - We watch that mall cop movie. No, not that one. The dumb one.30:56 - 34:00- Final judgments34:01 - 39:42 - The sad bastards recommend.39:43 - 40:50 - Goodbyes, theme and a special message about Stuart's penis.

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Unfortunately not the sequel to Topsy-Turvy. Upside Down is a movie about two young lovers from planets with reverse gravity, and we somehow make it through the whole episode without making a joke about 69-ing. Meanwhile, Stuart gets his annual review, Dan can't stop getting all science-y, Elliott discusses auto-erotic time travel, and... we'll let you enjoy the surprise.

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Lou Fernandez of Loureads.com helps us out by lending his melifluous pipes and his sophisticated producing style to this advertisement.

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Dan was out of town this weekend, so he didn't have time to write full show notes for this episode, but he did have time to post it, and HERE IT IS!

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More accurately, bullet "in" the head, and then quickly "out" of the head. Walter Hill has made several great movies in his career. Is Bullet to the Head one of them? Meanwhile, Stuart unveils a new impression in his repertoire, Dan inspires a discussion about the horrors of gorilla sex, and Elliott keeps missing our special celebrity guest.Movies recommended in this episode:Big Brown EyesThe Queen of VersaillesClose Up

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Thanks to recording in advance, we're a little late to the party discussing the Oscar Best Picture change.

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The prequel to Teen Witch (we assume). Hansel & Gretel Witch Hunters was produced by Adam McCay, so it was clearly meant as a goof, but is that enough? Meanwhile, Elliott makes an indecent proposal, Dan reveals a startling breadth of knowledge regarding Misty Mundae's acting career, and Stuart lays down the pun laws. Also, the OP's receive the GREATEST GIFT IN THE HISTORY OF MANKIND.

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0:00 - 0:35 - Introduction and theme0:36 - 39:20 - We apparently have more to say about Friday the 13th than any movie we've watched previously.39:21 - 43:40- The most shocking final judgments yet.43:41 - 51:24 - Listener mail51:25 - 56:06 - In lieu of film recommendation, a slew of plugs: a zine, Elliott's film series, and Dan's sketch group.56:07 - 56:42 - Goodbyes, theme and outtakes.

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We hope the psychic damage we endured was worth it do you guys: we finally caved and watched Marmaduke. Meanwhile, Elliott reveals Marmaduke's historical shenanigans, Stuart's Pacific Rim review gets scatological, and Dan would be indulging in blatant Parade-pandering with his Howard Huge reference, if we hadn't recorded before they endorsed us.0:00 - 0:30 - Introduction and theme.0:31 - 41:38 - Wait, this ISN'T a movie about a duke made out of marmalade?41:39 - 42:17 - Final judgments.41:18 - 43:47 - Some brief shout-outs to our podcast friends.43:48 - 55:06 - Flop House Movie Mailbag55:07 - 1:05:42 - The sad bastards recommend.1:05:43 - 1:07:31 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:31 - Introduction and theme0:32 - 2:22 - We introduce our guest host: stand-up comedian and comedy writer Amanda Melson.2:23 - 31:20 - In Bride Wars, there are no winners.  Only bloodstained white tulle.31:21 - 34:23- Final judgments34:24 - 39:02 - Listener mail, and a revelation about Dan's slumlord background.39:03 - 45:40 - The sad bastards recommend45:41 - 47:24 - Goodbyes, theme and outtakes.

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Ebert was right about you. 0:00 - 0:29 - Introduction and theme.0:30 - 8:00 - We take a long time to reveal something that's revealed in the episode title.8:01 - 40:09 - Nathaniel Hawthorne's timeless classic about bath voyeurism.40:10 - 42:01 - Final judgments.42:02 - 1:00:534 - Flop House Movie Mailbag1:00:35 - 1:05:53 - The sad bastards recommend.1:05:54 - 1:08:11 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Paul Masson's got nothing on us.

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0:00 - 0:41 - Introduction and theme0:42 -  31:36 - We discuss Beverly Hills Chihuahua, the movie that made talking Chihuahuas a national sensation. Wait... I'm thinking of Taco Bell.31:36 - 38:38 - Final judgments38:39 - 46:00 - After some hilarity about the Civil War, we read a letter from a listener.46:01 - 53:19 - The sad bastards recommend53:20 - 55:35 - Dan reveals a shameful talent for remembering celebrity nude scenes, followed by goodbyes, theme and outtakes.

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Yippee ki-yay, mother floppers. 0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 39:03 - An old man goes to Russia and crashes a lot of cars.39:04- 43:35- Final judgments.43:36- 47:14- A word from our sponsor.47:15 - 1:00:59 - Flop House Movie Mailbag1:00:01 - 1:04:41 - The sad bastards recommend.1:04:42 - 1:06:22 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Elliott lists some terrible remake ideas, while Stu contributes a remake he'd like to see.

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0:00 - 0:31 - Introduction and theme0:34 -  27:04 - Will Smith.  Rosario Dawson.  A Jellyfish.  The formula for a blockbuster smash?  We discuss Seven Pounds.27:05 - 29:50 - Final judgments29:51 - 34:38 - The sad bastards recommend34:39 - 40:04 - Some last minute bitching and moaning about Seven Pounds, followed by goodbyes, theme and outtakes.

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A little something extra from our Jaws: The Revenge live screening

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WOOOOLVERIIIINES! 0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 36:26 - North Korea would've gotten away with it, too, if it wasn't for you meddling kids!36:27 - 37:47- Final judgments.37:48- 43:47 - A word from our sponsor.43:48 - 57:32 - Flop House Movie Mailbag57:33 - 1:02:11 - The sad bastards recommend.1:02:12 - 1:03:34 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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America swaps bodies with its younger self, to go back to a time when body-swap movies were popular.

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme0:34 -  31:12 - After a brief trip south of the border, we talk about The Spirit. The movie that manages to make superheroes dull and cleavage unsexy.31:13 - 33:24 - Final judgments33:25 - 42:27 - The sad bastards recommend42:28 - 46:09 - A little talk about ghosts and Jedi molestation, followed by goodbyes, theme and outtakes.

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Oh Nicholas Sparks, you're the creepiest! APOLOGIES for the audio issues in this episode -- specifically Dan's ear-splitting levels. It does get (somewhat) better as the episode goes on.0:00 - 0:48 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 39:54 - You play a good game, Butler! But do you play... for KEEPS?39:55 - 40:13- A barely-there final judgments.40:14- 43:47 - A word from our sponsor.43:48 - 58:15 - Flop House Movie Mailbag58:16 - 1:04:42 - The sad bastards recommend.1:04:43 - 1:06:19 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:35 - Introduction and theme.0:36 - 29:03 - We are way, way too soft on Fireproof, in order to avoid ticking off our vast, yet nonexistent, audience of evangelical listeners.29:04 - 35:26 - Final judgments. 35:27 - 44:39 - A letter from a listener illuminates important Flop House guidelines.44:40 - 55:09 - The sad bastards recommend.55:10 - 57:34 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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The Butler did it. 0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 34:16 - You play a good game, Butler! But do you play... for KEEPS?34:17 - 36:16- Final judgments.36:17 - 38:43 - A word from our sponsor.38:44 - 53:53 - Flop House Movie Mailbag53:54  - 1:02:17 - The sad bastards recommend.1:02:18 - 1:04:11 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Even more trailers for upcoming films.

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0:00 - 0:38 - Introduction and theme.0:39 - 30:46 - Is Mirrors scarier or less scary than any other horror film starring an inanimate object?30:47 - 33:46 - Final judgments.  33:47 - 43:35 - Letters from listeners and a window into Dan's low self esteem.43:36 - 49:25 - The sad bastards recommend.49:26 - 50:11 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Since people seem to enjoy the outtakes, here's an extended peek behind the Flop House curtain, with even more talk of Demon Knight and other topics.

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NICHOLAS CA-AAAGE! 0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 36:00 - Some people just feel like home, y'know? Like Nic Cage in Stolen.36:01 - 38:56 - Final judgments..38:57 - 58:32 - Flop House Movie Mailbag58:33- 1:08:11 - The sad bastards recommend.1:08:12 - 1:09:45 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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No time for show notes this week, but enjoy the episode.

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Turns out it's Whoopi Goldberg.

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Boy-wise, whose would you say that is? 0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 36:29 - Samberg and Sandler. Together alphabetically, now together in real life.36:30 - 42:12 - Final judgments.42:13 - 44:43 - Some housekeeping and plugs.44:44 - 59:55 - Flop House Movie Mailbag59:56 - 1:05:02 - The sad bastards recommend.1:05:03- 1:06:30 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Apologies for the sound quality of this show.  We had sound issues we weren't aware of until well after the taping.0:00 - 0:26 - Theme0:27 - 45:34 - We discuss the Oscars. Oh surely the skies will be dark tonight as all the stars are in Hollywood's Kodak Theater!45:35 - 55:35 - Letters from listeners.55:36 - 56:39 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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The beefy hand of justice! 0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 39:41- Alex Cross gonna make you jump, jump.39:42 - 43:32 - Final judgments.43:33 - 45:21 - Some brief plugs.45:22 - 55:43 - Flop House Movie Mailbag55:44 - 59:54 - The sad bastards recommend.59:55 - 1:01:25 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Clean up in your Oscar pool the scientific way!

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 3:41 - We introduce guest host extraordinaire Will Hines.3:42 - 33:37 - What happens when the American election comes down to JUST ONE VOTE?  Wait.  You say that would never happen?  Shit.  Then what are we gonna do about this Swing Vote movie?  I guess we should just make fun of it.33:38 - 38:23 - Final judgments.  Plus: the weirdest joke ever to appear on The Flop House.38:24 - 51:09 - Letters from listeners.51:10 - 58:26 - The sad bastards recommend.58:27 - 59:17 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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A fan-chosen repeat of a classic episode. Enjoy re-living the misery!

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0:00 - 0:32 - Floptacular introduction and theme.0:33 - 27:59 - A discussion of this year's Academy Awards. Remember when those were on? Like three weeks ago? Anyone?28:00 - 34:50 - We give out the most prestigious awards in Hollywood, The Floppies.34:51 - 47:34 - A special year-in-review run of recommendations.47:35 - 59:37 - Flop House Movie Mailbag59:38 - 1:01:00 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Dan was on vacation this week, and he owns all the recording equipment.  So, until next week's new episode, please enjoy this re-run.

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We make up for our lost movie minute with our longest supplemental episode yet, about how the Oscars are always wrong.

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Dan's surgery kept him from writing up detailed show notes, which is lame, we know. But come on. Between that and Oogieloves, hasn't he suffered enough?

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0:00 - 0:31 - Introduction and theme0:32 - 22:00 - Watch out for Nicholas Cage. That motherfucker is BANGKOK Dangerous.22:01 - 34:35 - We get bored of talking about Bangkok Dangerous, and quickly digress into talk of AVP2, pornography, Friday the 13th, Nightmare on Elm Street, Zombie Strippers, Return of the Jedi, and Hitman (with a little more Bangkok Dangerous thrown in as anti-spice)34:36 - 39:28 - Final judgments39:30 - 46:59 - Letters from listeners.47:00 - 52:35- The sad bastards recommend.52:36 - 53:54 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:35 - 40:59 - When we were paperboys, we remember a lot less rough sex.41:00 - 42:38 - Final judgments42:29 - 54:32 - Flop House Movie Mailbag54:33 - 1:03:00 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:03:01 - 1:06:55 - The gang's an asshole to Dan, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme.0:35 - 34:36 - That kid's really turning over a new leaf. A NEW LEAF. GET IT? Aaaaah, you don't get it.34:37 - 37:20 - Final judgments37:21 - 38:06 - Plugs38:07 - 54:29 - The only helpful edition of the Flop House Movie Mailbag54:30 - 1:01:28 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:01:29 - 1:03:00 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:31 - Introduction and theme0:32 - 2:00 - We reintroduce ourselves, after our long winter's nap.2:01 - 33:51- In the long tradition of dance films, this is certainly one of them.33:52 - 36:40 - Final judgments36:41 - 43:25 - Letters from listeners.43:26 - 54:33 - The sad bastards recommend, New Year's special - our top five films of the year.54:34 - 55:50 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 42:19 - Hey, Len Wiseman's never made a bad action film starring his wife Kate Beckensale, right? Right?42:20 - 45:14 - Final judgments45:15 - 47:30 - Plugs47:31 - 57:19 - The only helpful edition of the Flop House Movie Mailbag57:2-  - 1:04:00 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:04:01- 1:05:48 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Christmas specials under the microscope.The music you hear in this episode is Hark the Herald Angels sing, as performed by Doug Hammer on the album Noel, courtesy of feelslikechristmas.com, which provides free Christmas music for personal and nonprofit use.

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0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme.0:35 - 5:04 - We spend the first five minutes talking about a movie about toys that WASN'T the one we watched, released more than a decade ago.5:05 - 11:14 - We make a brief feint at discussing Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium, but quickly get sidetracked by Willy Wonka and old-time character actors.11:15 - 35:41 - We finally manage to focus on the topic at hand, the horrifying tale of a sentient toy store and its insane inhabitants.  What's that?  It's a kids' film? ...You sure?35:42 - 40:05 - Final judgments.40:06 - 44:10 - Copyright infringement, listener mail, and discussion of nude Lea Thompson.44:11 - 46:34 - The MOST IMPORTANT SEGMENT EVER.46:35 - 54:38 - The sad bastards recommend.54:39 - 58:30 - Goodbyes, outtakes, and theme.

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More trailers for the biggest winter releases.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 2:15 - Mustaches are much discussed.2:16 - 32:22 - We talk about the Katherine Heigel rom-com 27 Dresses, and show our affinity for the material by staying on-topic almost never.  Also: boobs.32:23 - 36:30 - Final judgments, in which 27 Dresses manages to SHATTER the Flop House categories.36:31 - 46:17 - The sad bastards recommend.  Plus, we learn another famous person Elliott has had tangential interactions with.  And also: even more boobs.46:18 - 48:46 - November-December is Flop House listener pledge drive season - but you don't have to pay us in cash-- just recruit new listeners.48:47 - 51:30 - We write the great lost sex comedy, "Lustache."51:31 - 52:55 - Goodbyes, theme, outtakes, and a whole heck of a lot more boobs.

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0:00 - 0:30 - Introduction and theme.0:31 - 37:37 - The Original Peaches ring out 2012 and ring in the New Year with the man who has given us so much: Nicholas Flopolas Cage.37:38 - 40:10 - Final judgments40:11 - 57:57- Flop House Movie Mailbag57:58  - 1:06:20 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:06:21- 1:08:13 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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We present this alternate, much shorter, version of the Al Pacino film 88 Minutes.

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0:00 - 0:31 - Introduction and theme.0:32 - 35:10 - Fan favorite Hallie Haglund subs in for Stu in our discussion of the jukebox gloss-fest, Rock of Ages.35:11 - 39:28 - Final judgments39:29 - 56:58 - Flop House Movie Mailbag, with the very first letters DUET.56:59  - 1:03:36 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:03:37- 1:04:59 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:30 - Introduction and theme.0:31 - 5:02 - We explain why we're the dynamic duo this week, and talk about how much we miss Stuart.  Also: we engage in the name-droppiest name dropping yet, as Elliott tells the story of the time he met PRESIDENT ELECT BARACK OBAMA.5:03 - 32:52 - We talk about 88 Minutes, the movie that is a worse example of real-time filmmaking than Nick of Time, and a far worse example of post-mortem semen-swapping than Presumed Innocent.32:53 - 37:25 - Final judgments, plus a brief side-track into dream analysis.37:26 - 45:43 - The sad bastards recommend.  45:43 - 46:32 - We talk about Stuart some more.  Jeez!  Why don't us guys get a room, already!46:33 - 49:03 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Stuart's harrowing tale of survival is now a zany comedy starring Seth Rogan.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 41:07 - Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter takes us on a 100% accurate tour through American history.41:08 - 42:32 - Final judgments42:33 - 43:40 - All Things Comedy plugs43:41 - 58:17 - Flop House Movie Mailbag58:18 - 1:05:07 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:05:08 - 1:06:22 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:39 - Introduction and theme.0:40 - 41:28 - It's a Flop House event!  We've been waiting so long for the DVD release for M. Night Shyamalan's The Happening that we jump right in and don't stop talking about it for forty minutes.  (Would I call it a "Flop House happening?"  No.  That would be dumb.)41:29 - 44:17 - Final judgments on The Happening.44:18 - 48:30 - What the heck.  Final judgments on M. Night, too.48:31 - 56:40 - The sad bastards recommend. 56:41 - 58:26 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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In the first edition of Name Droppin', Elliott talks about working with Ian McShane.

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Due to Election Day and vacation travel scheduling, show notes for this episode are unavailable. Our apologies. Here is a picture of a funny cat: http://tinyurl.com/mhstpx

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0:00 - 0:37 - Introduction and theme.0:38 - 1:54 - The whole team is back together again, so to celebrate they ramble off-topic for a while.1:55 - 37:13 - We talk about Prom Night, a shocking expose about the incompetence of the Bridgeport police department.37:14 - 40:35 - Final judgments.40:36 - 49:27 - We explain why we haven't had the Flop House contest winner on, announce a winner of the Ewe Boll contest, and Dan shamelessly plugs his own project.49:28 - 52:54 - The sad bastards recommend. 52:55 - 54:30 - Goodbyes, theme, outtakes, and many, many sound effects

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Detailed show notes canceled on account of hurricane.

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We give you directions on how to make your own Flop House at home.

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What do you get when Stuart is out of town on vacation, Elliott is busy transitioning from one high-stress television comedy job to another high-stress television comedy job, and Dan is having Internet problems?  A rerun!  Hey, at least we don't do it as much as LOST.  (Well, as much as they used to... before their uninterrupted seasons... lets pretend that joke was still relevant and move on). In this, one of our favorite episodes, we discussed Bratz-- a movie that was so unexpectedly delightful in its badness that it became the gold standard for Flop House film ratings.  Enjoy.

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0:00 - 0:36 - Introduction and SHOCKtober theme.0:37 - 31:33 - Quoth The Raven, "Wouldn't it be cool if Poe, like, fought a serial killer?!"31:34 - 36:09 - Pumpkin spice flavored final judgments36:10 - 54:18 - Flop House Movie Mailbag54:19 - 59:35 - The sad bastards recommend. 59:36 - 1:01:58 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 2:45 - We welcome back Elliott Kalan, make fun of Stuart, and reintroduce Ritch Duncan.2:46 - 40:22 - We make up for our spottily-released late summer shows by making this our second-longest episode ever and spending far too much time discussing Wild Hogs-- possibly more than the screenwriter took to write it.40:23 - 44:30 - Final judgments.44:31 - 49:10 - We congratulate Elliott on some huge news, and spend a little time discussing the Ewe Boll contest (with a brief R.I.P. for Dan's local video rental place).49:11 - 55:56 - The sad bastards recommend.55:57 - 57:28 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 31:34 - Isn't it always the way? You meet the man of your dreams, and God gives you butt cancer.31:35 - 32:44 - Final judgments32:45 - 41:55 - Some thanks, some plugs, but most importantly: our BIG ANNOUNCEMENT.41:56 - 54:33 - Flop House Movie Mailbag54:35 - 1:00:53 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:00:54 - 1:02:45 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 37:37 - A movie as bloated and overlong as Battleship deserves one of our most bloated and overlong discussions, right?37:38 - 40:07 - Final judgments40:08 - 42:33 - A plug for our live panel show, and a discussion that honestly probably should have been cut from the podcast.42:34 - 55:54 - Flop House Movie Mailbag55:55 - 1:29:59- The sad bastards recommend. 1:30:00 - 1:04:55 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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We honor the modern-day Ed Wood with a contest.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 2:30 - We introduce our guest co-host, leggy comedienne Sara Schaefer.2:31 - 35:29 - We each give our vantage points on the film Vantage Point.  See what I did there?  I made you want to shoot yourself.35:30 - 38:40 - Final judgments. 38:41 - 43:28 - We announce the WINNER OF THE FLOP HOUSE CONTEST!43:29 - 47:17 - The sad bastards recommend.  (Also, according to our web research, the second movie Sara recommends-- the one where she can't remember the title-- is probably Butcher Wing.)47:18 - 52:11 - Sara plugs some stuff, and Stuart demonstrates his complete misunderstanding of the concept of plugs.52:12 - 53:29 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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Apologies for the lack of more detailed show notes, as 2/3 of the Flop House are busy traveling for the GOP and Democratic conventions.

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We talk with the listeners, walk with the listeners.

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 35:10 - At least Passion Play is the first Megan Fox movie that's not bad BECAUSE of Megan Fox. That's gotta be worth something, right?35:11 - 38:26 - Final judgments38:27 - 55:05 - Flop House Movie Mailbag55:06 - 59:24 - The sad bastards recommend. 59:25 - 1:00:27 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 1:57 - We take a moment to discuss Stuart's choice of attire.1:58 - 38:02 - We discuss the film One Missed Call, the movie that asks the question, "Can anything be all bad, if it involves Ray Wise?"38:03 - 41:09 - Final judgments.41:10 - 49:21- The sad bastards recommend. 49:22 - 51:45 - More on the Flop House contest, and goodbyes.51:46 - 52:30 - Theme and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:36 - Introduction and theme.0:37 - 33:57 - It's not much of a Ghost Rider movie, but at least it has spirit.33:58 - 38:55 - A recap supercut, followed by Final judgments38:56 - 53:35 - Flop House Movie Mailbag53:36 - 1:00:35 - The sad bastards recommend. 1:00:36 - 1:02:21 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 2:47 - We have our usual difficulty getting down to business.2:48 - 30:30 - Would 10,000 B.C. have been better if it had starred Ringo Starr and Shelly Long?  Yes.  Yes it would.30:31 - 34:13 - Final judgments.34:14 - 36:45 - A brief digression about the films of Brendan Fraser.36:46 - 46:13 - The sad bastards recommend. 46:14 - 52:57 - A greater explication of the Flop House contest, surveys, podcasty business, and goodbyes.52:58 - 53:39 - Theme and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 3:57 - After a brief interjection from "The Top House," we take on the perversion of Greek mythology, Immortals.32:55 - 36:20 - Final judgments36:21 - 51:50 - Flop House Movie Mailbag51:51 - 1:01:52 - The sad bastards recommend. 57:19 - 59:22 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:37 - Introduction and theme.0:38 - 3:57 - Some talk of Dan's stubble and much talk of his national TV debut3:58 - 32:45 - A discussion of A Thousand Words, the movie that we assume resulted from Eddie Murphy not wanting to learn a lot of lines.32:46 - 35:53 - Final judgments35:54 - 51:50 - Flop House Movie Mailbag51:51 - 1:01:52 - The most interrupt-y sad bastards recommend ever!. 1:01:53 - 1:04:25 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:29- Introduction and theme.0:30 - 2:12 - We re-introduce guest host Zhubin Parang2:14 - 36:55 - Hey look everyone! It's a dopey thing that people have based their whole philosophy on.36:56 - 40:34 - Final judgments40:35 - 56:46 - Flop House Movie Mailbag50:18 - 1:01:13 - The sad bastards recommend1:01:14 - 1:02:49 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes

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0:00 - 0:48- Introduction, live show reminder, and theme.0:49 - 4:23 - More nonsense than usual.4:24 - 36:18 - When you think "bounty hunter" you think Katherine Heigl. 36:19 - 38:55 - Final judgements38:56 - 50:17 - Flop House Movie Mailbag50:18 - 58:52 - The sad bastards recommend. 58:53 - 1:00:03 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:31- Introduction and theme.0:32 - 2:15 - Stu talks Puerto Rico and celebrity beefs  2:16 - 36:29 - 'Allo 'allo, it's me, Danyul Craig, wot's all these Cowboys & Aliens, then?36:30 - 37:50 - Final judgements37:51 - 53:00 - Flop House Movie Mailbag53:01 - 59:21 - The sad bastards recommend. 59:22 - 1:00:30 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:35- Introduction and theme.0:36 - 9:15 - Our guest, Al Madrigal, regales us with tales of what it's like to actually appear in a Flop House-quality film.  9:16 - 49:40 - A discussion of The Last Godfather, a Korean comedy star's attempt to conquer the American market. As crossovers go, it's at least as successful as "Rappin' Rodney."49:41 - 51:27 - Final judgements51:28 - 1:02:00 - Al talks Craigslist moviemaking, and the sad bastards recommend. 1:02:01 - 1:04:26 - A plug, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:44 - Introduction and theme.0:45 - 3:50 - We waste a little time celebrating a meaningless milestone3:51 - 44:04 - A discussion of America's filmmaking apex: Tango & Cash44:05 - 1:00:00 - The Flop House Movie Mailbag1:00:01 - 1:06:431:06:44 - 1:08:00 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:36 - Introduction and theme.0:37 - 5:37 - We discuss In Time's "Olivia Wildegate" scandal5:38 - 34:34 - The Three Musketeers has inspired at least twenty full-length film adaptations and many more sequels, shorts, and cartoons. It is timeless tale, impossible to ruin. This film does its damnedest.  34:35 - 38:19 - Final judgements38:20 - 51:20 - Flop House Movie Mailbag51:21 - 1:00:09  - Our longest recommendations in a while1:00:10 - 1:03:00 - Plugs, theme, and outtakes.

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But there was time! Time enough... at last!

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 34:00 - We discuss The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences' top honor. You know, the one they entrusted to Billy Crystal.34:01 - 44:29 - We bestow the most coveted of all awards: The Floppies.44:30 - 1:00:02 - Flop House Movie Mailbag1:00:03 - 1:07:40  - Some year-end recommendations from 20111:07:41 - 1:10:02 - Plugs, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 2:50 - The peaches reacquaint themselves with each other and this thing called "podcasting."2:51 - 30:20 - We discuss Nic Cage's latest Flop House joint, Trespass, which approached Delgo levels of failure.30:21- 34:18 - Final judgments34:19 - 50:00  - Flop House Movie Mailbag50:01 - 57:29 - The sad bastards recommend.57:30 - 1:02:04- Plugs, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.0:34 - 6:41 - We introduce our special guest, fellow Daily Show writer Zhubin Parang, and extend thanks to all who came to the live show.6:42 - 37:15 - We discuss Nic Cage's latest Flop House joint, Trespass, which approached Delgo levels of failure.37:16 - 39:50 - Final judgments39:51 - 52:55  - Flop House Movie Mailbag52:56 - 57:00 - The sad bastards recommend.57:01 - 59:27- Frackcast, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 2:30 - A lot of nonsense about bears.0:33 - 2:56 - The usual bullshit.2:57 - 32:08 - Conan hears the lamentations of the Flop House.32:09 - 38:24 - Final judgments38:251 - 52:34  - Flop House Movie Mailbag52:35 - 54:36 - We plug our LIVE EVENT.54:37 - 57:01 - The sad bastards recommend.57:02 - 58:35- Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

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0:00 - 0:32 - Introduction and theme.0:33 - 2:56 - The usual bullshit.2:57 - 36:23 - Look! Up in the air! It's a Granny Smith apple! It's Kermit! No, it's the GREEN LANTERN!36:24 - 40:20 - Final judgments40:21 - 52:55  - Flop House Movie Mailbag52:56 - 56:25 - We plug our LIVE EVENT.56:26 - 57:52 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.