In the Wake: Recent Episodes
Whytli Rogers
Welcome to In the Wake with Whytli! I am a certified life coach and a mental health advocate. I am also a survivor of sexual and mental abuse. The phrase 'in the wake' means the ‘result of something occurring’ and I originally started this podcast as a result of my story and everything I have overcome. I continuously choose to rise up from the trenches and speak up about these various taboo and stigmatized topics. I choose empowerment, growth, and empathy. As I continue on my healing and self growth journey, I will use my voice to share my truth and insights along with amplifying the voices and stories of others. I interview guests whose messages have resonated with and inspired me. Tune in for weekly episodes on all things mental health, survivorship, and self help!!
Harpartap and Whytli met during their senior year of high school while participating in first week ice breaker activities. From that day forward, many unforgettable memories were made and introspective conversations were had.
Harpartap is currently living in France where he is studying to one day become an architect. In his free time, he lets his artistic juices flow along with diving deeper into his Sikh beliefs and practices. Post high school, the two have continued to stay in touch through penpal letters and the occasional video call.
In this episode, Harpartap and Whytli discuss their beliefs and insights about religion and spirituality. He gives a peek into his Sihk faith and practices.
We cover the following topics:
- Myths or misunderstandings about religion & spiritualism
- Differences between organized religion & spirituality
- His Sihk faith, beliefs, & principles
- His personal spiritual practices & meditation
- Message to those struggling with their spirituality
Tune in to hear the rest of his story and perspectives!
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Resources (Provided by Harpartap):
- 5 Vices in Sihkism
- 4,000 Year History of Turban
- Positive Affirmations Meditation
- Jup Ji Saheeb
- Nanak Naam Courses
Song: 100 Days by AJR
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Connect with Harpartap & his work:
- Website: harpartap.fr
- Instagram: @turbanathor
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Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
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- Twitter: @whytli
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- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Lopa van der Mersch is many things: Ayurvedic practitioner. Mother of two. Sustainability advocate. TEDx speaker. Recovering cult member. Her adventures have taken her around the world in search of health, spiritual fulfillment, and deep energy. 2 Years ago, she added a new chapter to her life story: Founder and CEO of Rasa, the adaptogenic coffee alternatives revolutionizing people’s relationship to their energy.
Many of us spend our lives seeking spiritual truth and fulfillment. But, for Lopa, that journey led her somewhere she never expected — a cult. She might not have found all the answers she was looking for, but she did learn a tremendous amount about outsourcing your inner knowing, losing (and reclaiming) your voice, and finding your unshakable source of integrity within.
Back in what she calls her “cult days,” Lopa’s whole world revolved around rigid adherence to dogma. She’s worked hard to turn the traumas of her past into lessons for her future — embracing nuance over dogma, empathy over authority, and flexibility over rigidity. The strategies she’s developed for applying these lessons took a lifetime of unique experience to discover.
In this episode, Lopa shares her story from before her cult days, experiences within the cult, and what it was like leaving and recovering from that cult. She speaks about her evolving spiritual beliefs and how she has reclaimed her voice and inner knowing.
We dive into the following:
- How she found herself in a cult & what she experienced within one
- How abusive relationships & cults have similar patterns
- Religions vs. cults
- Leaving & recovering from a cult
- Why it's harmful to outsource your spiritual sovereignty
- Reclaiming her voice & inner knowing
- Embracing nuance over dogma
Tune in to hear the rest of her story & wisdom!!
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Resources:
- Books:
- The Guru Papers by Joel Kramer
- Man's Search For Meaning by Victor E. Frankl
- Song: Lingala by Lee Burridge & Lost Desert
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Follow along with Lopa & her work:
- Website: wearerasa.com
- Instagram:
- @lopalovesyou
- @wearerasa
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Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Anung Vilay is the owner of Courageous Creativity, where she helps introverts and black sheep create lives that fit them instead of continuously trying to fit into the boxes that society has pushed. She's the host of two podcasts: The Introvert's Bubble and I Don't Wanna Fit In. On top of that, she is also an author and photographer.
In this episode, Anung shares her experiences setting boundaries and taking care of herself as an introvert. She describes what it was like growing up as an introvert, how she handles social situations and what stereotypes are inaccurate about introverts.
We dive into the following topics:
- What it means to be an introvert vs. extrovert
- What being an introvert looks like for her personally
- Inaccurate stereotypes about introverts
- Growing up as an introvert
- Setting boundaries & self care as an introvert
Tune in to hear the rest of her story and insights!!
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Resources:
- Book: Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain
- Song: Shatter Me by Lindsey Sterling
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Connect with Anung & her work:
- Website: courageouscreativity.com
- Podcast:
- The Introvert's Bubble
- I Don't Wanna Fit In
- Instagram:
- @courageous_creativity
- @theintrovertsbubble
- Book: Get Out of My Bubble by Anung Vilay
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Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Jamie Beth Cohen is a novelist, essayist, storyteller, and podcaster. She writes about difficult things, but her friends think she’s actually really funny. Jamie lives in Lancaster County, PA with her family and hosts the spreadsheet podcast, “There’s a Column for That!” Her writing has appeared in TeenVogue.com, The Washington Post/On Parenting, HuffPost, and several other outlets. WASTED PRETTY, her debut novel for teens and their adults is a sex-positive story about the aftermath of a sexual assault. LIMINAL SUMMER, the sequel to WASTED PRETTY, will be published in 2021.
In this episode, Jamie shares her experiences and insights as a Jewish woman parenting two Jewish children in a Christian-dominated society. She dives into antisemitism, parenting through social justice topics, and how to build more inclusive communities for children.
We dive into the following topics:
- What it means to be Jewish to her
- What it feels like to be seen
- Harmful stigmas & myths people have regarding Jewish people
- Breaking down antisemitism
- How parents & teachers can stop the rise of antisemitism
- Parenting through social justice issues
- Her thoughts on online activism
Tune in to hear many stories and insights from Jamie herself!
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Resource: We Need Diverse Books
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Connect with Jamie & her work:
- Instagram:
- @jamiebeths
- @wastedpretty
- Twitter:
- @jamie_beth_s
- @column_pod
- Website: www.jamiebethcohen.com
- Podcast: There's A Column For That
- Books:
- Wasted Pretty by Jamie Beth Cohen
- Liminal Summer by Jamie Beth Cohen
- Articles:
- My Neighbor Had A Confederate Flag. My Daughter Had the Perfect Response
- 7 Ways for Parents and Teachers to Stop the Rise of Antisemitism
- When My Daughter's Teacher Erased Her Judaism for a Class Project
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Song: Seasons of Love - Rent
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Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Shannon Knight (she/her) is a queer therapist with a private practice in Tampa, FL where she specializes in working with individuals and couples. She’s the author of Understanding Gender Identity an online course for parents and professionals to better understand their gender diverse child. She's also the co-host of The Tarot Diagnosis a podcast where her and her colleague, Luna, explore the intersection of psychology, mental health, and tarot.
In this episode, Shannon helps us break down the spectrums that gender and sexuality lie on. She gives a great base level of understanding for commonly used terms and concepts in regards to gender, sexuality, and sex. Along with that, we dive deeper into how these things are affected by toxic masculinity, misogyny, rigid gender roles and more.
We discuss the following topics:
- Defining the differences between gender, sexuality, & sex
- How gender & sexuality lie on a spectrum
- The difference between gender identity & gender expression
- Parenting children exploring their gender & sexuality
- How rigid gender roles plays a part into toxic masculinity & misogyny
- What gender neutrality & gender equality entail
Tune in to hear the rest of her wisdom and insights!!
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Resources:
- Kinsey Institute
- Genderbread Person Diagram
- Gender Unicorn Diagram
- PFlag Chapter Network
- Instagram Follows:
- @indyamoore
- @pinkmantaray
- @blairimani
- @mattxiv
- @jenerous
Song: I Can Change By Lake Street Drive
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Connect with Shannon & her work:
- Website: moderncounseling.com
- Course: Understanding Gender Identity
- Podcast: The Tarot Diagnosis
- Instagram:
- @shannon_the_therapist
- @thetarotdiagnosis
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Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
TRIGGER WARNING
This is a heavier episode as we speak of abuse, sexual assault, and trauma. If you are a survivor of abuse or sexual assault, please listen with caution or skip this episode entirely. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or trigger negative thoughts or emotions. Please practice self care, reach out to a trusted love one, and/or CALL the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1.800.799.SAFE(7233).
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Stevie is the founder of We Are HER. After leaving her abuser in 2016, she realized sharing her story, connecting with other survivors, and learning about DV were three crucial elements in her healing journey. She wanted to make sure every survivor could be given those three opportunities. When she’s not running HER, you’ll find her in the mountains of Montana hanging out with her partner and two border collies or reconnecting with her Mexican roots.
In this episode, Stevie shares her story of developing PTSD after both an abusive childhood and later being in an abusive relationship. She also dives into what it was like navigating the reporting process, court trial, and her thoughts on the justice system as a whole as a survivor. She wraps up by talking about her healing journey and building the We Are HER community for survivors to connect with each other.
We discuss the following points:
- Stevie's story of abuse
- Healthy dynamics within her new relationship
- Navigating the reporting process & justice system as a survivor
- Experiences leading up to a PTSD diagnosis
- Coping mechanism for PTSD
- Stigmas & misunderstandings around PTSD & survivors
Tune in to hear the rest of her story and insights!!
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Song: Keep It Between the Lines by Sturgill Simpson
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Connect with Stevie & her work:
- Instagram:
- @wearehernetwork
- @steviecroisant
- Facebook: We Are HER Network
- Facebook Group: We Are HER Survivors Group
- Website: weareher.net
- Podcast: We Are HER
- Email: stevie@weareher.net
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Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Anna and Maria are twins and co-hosts of the mental health podcast, Bipolar Bicoastal. They launched the show after receiving their bipolar diagnoses in order to help others struggling with mental illness and the people that love them. Bipolar Bicoastal is a blend of discussions and interviews that offer a humorous look at serious mental health topics and concrete ways to cope with bipolar disorder.
Anna lives in Baltimore, MD and is a manager on a crisis hotline for sexual assault survivors (far too many of whom have severe mental illness), while Maria lives in Los Angeles and is an Associate Producer for reality tv shows.
In this episode, Anna and Maria share their stories of getting diagnosed with bipolar disorders and how their experiences are both similar and different as twin sisters. They also help break down some of the myths and stigmas that surround bipolar disorders and describe how those shame filled stigmas have affected them personally.
We discuss the following:
- Stigmas & misconceptions about bipolar disorder
- What events led up to each of them getting diagnosed
- How they reacted to that diagnosis
- Similarities & differences between Bipolar 1 and Bipolar 2
- How shame or stigma has played a part in their stories
- Coping mechanisms they have implemented into their lives
Tune in to hear the rest of their story!
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Resources:
- Book: Marbles: Mania, Depression, Michelangelo and Me by Ellen Forney
- Website: EndTheStigma.org
- Instagram: @endthestigmaorg
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Song: No One by Alicia Keys
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Connect with them & their work:
- Podcast: Bipolar Bicoastal
- Instagram: @bipolarbicoastal
- Facebook: Bipolar Bicoastal
- Facebook Group: Bipolar Bicoastal Secret Group
- Patreon: Bipolar Bicoastal
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Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Brianne Leeson is an artist and small business owner from Dallas, Texas. She is also the creator of the scripted comedy/fiction podcast Today’s Lucky Winner.
You might have recognized Brianne from Episode 80 where she shared how her ADHD and eating disorder affected one another. In this follow up part two episode, Brianne is continuing her story about how she has also received an autism diagnosis.
Brianne was diagnosed in her thirties with ADHD and later autism which led her to a whole new realm of self discovery and understanding. She began to realize how both her ADHD and autism had affected or amplified different things throughout growing up including her relationship with her body and an eating disorder. After receiving her autism diagnosis, she had to dismantle her own misconceptions and ableism. With the knowledge she has of herself now, she is able to adapt with her differences, look at her life through a new lens, and advocate for her specific needs.
We discuss the following:
- What led her to pursue an autism diagnosis
- Things she didn't realize were traits of autism
- Similarities & differences between ADHD & autism
- Stigmatized misconceptions around autism
- What masking and stimming look like
- Harmful VS. helpful language to use when speaking of autism
Tune in to hear the rest of Brianne's story!!
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Resources:
- Venn Diagram of ADHD & Autism
- List of autistic traits (these led Brianne to pursue a diagnosis)
- Autism Diagnostic Tests
- Embrace Autism - The Ultimate Autism Resource
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Song: Seen & Not Seen by Talking Heads
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Connect with Brianne & her work:
- Instagram:
- @brianne_leeson
- @bellonaarts
- @luckywinnershow
- Podcast: Today's Lucky Winner Show
- Website: www.bellonaarts.com
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Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Denise is a poet and an award-winning writer, photographer, and artist, and an IT professional. And she is a survivor of childhood abuse. She is the author of a new self-help book: "Thriving After Sexual Abuse: Break Your Bondage to the Past and Live a Life You Love" where she provides tips and suggestions for readers to seek help, self-reflect, and pursue healing through a range of activities and practices and offers tangible strategies for readers to reclaim their lives and move forward to a life of Thriving.
In this episode, Denise shares her story of childhood sexual abuse at the hands of her grandfather and how that abuse affected the rest of her childhood & growing up. She takes us through her healing journey and what it took to move from a place of survival to now thriving.
We discuss the following points:
- Her story of childhood sexual abuse
- How the abuse affected the rest of her childhood & growing up
- Exploring different routes of healing
- Moving from simply surviving to truly thriving
- Why it may be so hard to begin your healing journey
- How healing is a series of letting go & welcomings
- Reflection prompts for healing
Tune in to hear the rest of her story & insights!
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Connect with Denise & her work:
- Website: thrivingaftersexualabusebook.com
- Healing Journey Library
- Book: Thriving After Sexual Abuse: Break Your Bondage to the Past and Live a Life You Love by Denise Bossarte
- Facebook: Thriving After
- Instagram: @poetryyogini
- YouTube: Thriving After
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Song: Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen
Hallelujah by Rufus Wainwright
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Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Dr. Traci Baxley is a mother of five, consultant, educator and coach dedicated to supporting families, organizations and corporations in developing diversity & inclusion practices that lead to meaningful relationships, genuine belonging and high productivity. She is also the creator of Social Justice Parenting®, a philosophy that moves families from fear-based parenting to creating spaces of belonging through compassion, radical love and social justice engagement.
In this episode, Traci takes us through her Social Justice Parenting model and philosophy and the types of conversations that parents need to be having with their children. She explains how Social Justice Parenting is rooted in radical love and is not equivalent to parenting out of fear along with why we should not be keeping our kids in the dark when it comes to what is happening in the world.
We discuss the following talking points:
- Why social justice parenting is not equivalent to parenting out of fear
- How social justice activism is rooted in radical love
- Her Social Justice Parenting model using the acronym ROCKS
- How to begin these conversations around social issues
- Why we should not keep our kids in the dark about what's happening in the world
Tune in to hear more of her wisdom & insight!!
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Connect with Traci & her work:
- Instagram: @socialjusticeparenting
- Facebook: Social Justice Parenting
- Website: www.socialjusticeparenting.com
- Book: Social Justice Parenting: How to Raise Compassionate, Anti-Racist, Justice-Minded Kids in an Unjust World by Traci Baxley
- TEDx Talk: Social Justice Parenting by Traci Baxley
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Songs:
- Sacred Space by India Arie
- I Am Light by India Arie
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Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Founder of the Enchanted Queen Empire, Samantha helps women combine the energy of a goddess with the strategy of a CEO to create a fulfilling life and business. Empowering you to plan, execute and play in the action frequency to hit your goals through deep transformative mindset and strategic coaching.
In this episode, Samantha helps us unpack 10 forms of spiritual bypassing and why they are harmful behaviors or beliefs. She also explains why the exclusive love & light brand of spirituality is also a form of bypassing.
We cover the following points:
- What spiritual bypassing means
- How spiritual bypassing shows up on an individual & collective level
- Why the exclusively love and light brand of spirituality is harmful
- Cultural appropriation of Indigenous spiritual practices
- Ten forms of spiritual bypassing
- Optimistic Bypass
- Higher Than / Self Righteous Bypass
- Victim Bypass
- Psychedelic Bypass
- Zodiac Bypass
- Guidance Bypass
- Saint Bypass
- Spirit Guide Bypass
- Prayer Bypass
- Worship Bypass
Tune in for more of her wisdom and insights!
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Resources:
- John Welwood originally introduced the term 'Spiritual Bypassing'
- Samantha's Instagram Live: Spiritual Bypassing: An Enticing Wonderland of Escapism
- Song: The Cure by Little Mix
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Connect with Samantha & her work:
- Instagram: @enchantedqueenempire
- Website: enchantedqueenempire.com
- The Empire Community
- One-on-One Coaching Package
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Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Antonio Myers is a D.C. resident on the autism spectrum. He believes that autism is his super blessing as he's a high-school valedictorian, college graduate, world traveler, podcast host, speaker/writer, and disability advocate.
"For Antonio Myers, life with autism has always felt like sitting in a movie theater. Everyone is watching the same film, but he’s the only one wearing 3-D glasses. He says, “I am able to see more, behind the scenes, which enables me to understand more of what’s in front of me. It makes me able to see people as human before anything else which also makes me very good at compassionate grieving or just bearing with people. My very first words at the age of four were: Stop bullying my friend!"
In this episode, Antonio shares with us his experiences facing the stigmas and stereotypes of autism and breaking beyond the limiting beliefs and boxes the world put him in.
We discuss the following talking points:
- Myths or misconceptions around autism
- How these myths have personally affected him
- His ideas for reforming education & accessibility
- His experiences of abuse & healing
- Language preferences around autism
Tune in to hear the rest of Antonio's story!!
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Connect with Antonio & his work:
- Podcast: Tonio Time Daily
- Blog: iamtrulyholistic.blogspot.com
- Instagram: @highlypraiseworthygracemayor
- Facebook: Antonio Myers
- YouTube: Tonio Time Daily
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Resources Provided by Antonio:
- Department on Disability Services
- The Brewer Foundation
- Inclusion 2021 Conference
- Included. Supported. Empowered.
- Article about the DSP Academy
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Song: My Feet Keep Dancing by Chic
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Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Amanda is a Civil Mediator and Conflict Resolution Specialist. She loves sticky, seemingly unsolvable problems. She uses tools like Dispute Specific Conflict Coaching, Online Mediation and Open Dialogue to help people have healthy conversations, set boundaries and resolve issues. When she isn't working you can find her exploring the woods of the Pacific Northwest with her kids and her dog.
In this episode, Amanda shares her tips and tools to having productive, healthy conversations when in conflict and difficult situations. She walks us through different scenarios and provides examples of what our immediate response may be during the conflict vs. what we can say instead to course-correct and engage in a more appropriate and helpful way.
We cover the following topics:
- How unresolved conflict impacts us both physically & emotionally
- How to gauge what is worth bringing up & hashing out VS. when to walk away & let it go
- Preparing for hard conversations
- Key components of a productive conversation
- Intention VS. impact
- Tips on how to stay present & listen fully
Tune in to hear the rest of her wisdom and insight!!
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Connect with Amanda & her work:
- Website: mindfulresolution.ca
- Twitter: @mindfulconres
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Resources:
- Listening Skills Podcast
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Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
TRIGGER WARNING
This is a heavier episode as we speak of rape and sexual assault. If you are a survivor of abuse or sexual assault, please listen with caution or skip this episode entirely. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or trigger negative thoughts or emotions. Please practice self care, reach out to a trusted love one, and/or CALL the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 800.656.HOPE(4673).
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Chidera Dimaka is a Nigerian podcaster currently living in Poland. During the week, she works at an IT firm as a service process controller. On her podcast, Rants With Chidera, she shares her thoughts and insights about all things adulthood, social issues, and self help topics. She's also a survivor of sexual assault.
In this episode, Chidera shares her story publicly for the first time ever. After she was sexually assaulted multiple times, she found great healing in hearing other #MeToo stories. Others' stories helped her realize that what happened to her wasn't consensual nor okay and that it wasn't her fault. At one point, she internalized rape culture and the victim blaming that follows suit but now speaks out against the harmful things in society that contribute to the normalizing of rape.
We cover the following points:
- Chidera's story & encounters of sexual assault
- The power of sharing your #MeToo stories
- What rape culture entails
- How rape culture has affected both of us
- Victim blaming
- Consent Education
Tune in to hear her story!!
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Resources:
- Book: Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft
- RAINN - Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network
- We Are HER - Foundation supporting survivors of domestic abuse & sexual violence
- Honey Is Here - Organization for survivors of sexual trauma
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Connect with Chidera & her work:
- Instagram:
- @chidybangs_
- @rwcpodcast
- Podcast: Rants With Chidera - RWC Podcast
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If you liked this episode and are craving more conversations like this, here are some follow up episodes of In the Wake with Whytli to relisten to:
- Episode 70 - Sexual Assault, Consent Education, & Victim Blaming with Katie McMahon
- Episode 66 - Racism Within Rape Culture with Cheyenne Tyler Jacobs
- Episode 54 - Hope & Healing After Sexual Assault with Kristine Irwin
- Episode 34 - Rape Culture & Myths with Laura W.
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Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Fluent in French and English, Areena Antoine was born in Mauritius Island and grew up in Vancouver, BC. Areena is an undergraduate Sociology student at the University of British Columbia. Sociology has helped Areena discover her passion for women's rights. After her studies, she hopes to become a lawyer specializing in human rights.
In her free time, she is a mentor with Go Girls helping young girl’s build confidence and self-awareness to thrive. Passionate and dedicated, Areena is the host of Self-Love Lounge Podcast -- a platform for empowered women to empower others.
In this episode, Areena and I dive into her self growth journey and talk about the fluctuating nature of self love. We discuss the sometimes ugly, hard, and messy sides to self care and why it's important to embrace the constant evolution of self through it all.
We discuss the following:
- What self love means to her
- Balancing self discipline & grace within your self care routine
- The turning point that set her onto her self love journey
- Hard truths of self love
- Responding to relationship dynamics that resist your growth & change
Tune in to hear more of her story and insight!
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Connect with Areena & her work:
- Podcast: Self Love Lounge
- Whytli's Interview on Self Love Lounge: Episode 8 - #MeToo
- Instagram: @selflovelounge_
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Songs:
- Six Feet Under by Billie Eilish
- All I Want by Olivia Rodrigo
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If you liked this episode and are craving more conversations like this, here are some follow up episodes of In the Wake with Whytli to relisten to:
- Episode 82 - Self Compassion and Softening Your Inner Critic
- Episode 62 - Rewriting the Stories We Tell Ourselves with Sabrina Pierotti
- Episode 59 - Setting Personal Boundaries with Raven Robinson
- Episode 53 - Limiting Beliefs and Intentional Happiness with Julie Leonard
- Episode 41 - Breaking Your Destructive Cycles
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Hawa Stephens is a former party girl who has overcome toxic relationships, lack of confidence, feeling unworthy, letting go of others expectations, and not being afraid to go after her dreams. She has a podcast called The Self Love Tribe that helps ambitious females go for it with relatable topics and discussions. She loves helping women learn how to love themselves and build confidence.
In this episode, Hawa shares the experiences that led her to make a drastic shift in her life where she started to prioritize her needs, set personal boundaries, and know her worth.
In this back and forth conversation, we discuss the following:
- The shameful messages around self care & prioritizing yourself
- Setting personal boundaries as a form of self care
- What self love and self care mean to Hawa
- How she shows up to her life differently ever since prioritizing her needs
- Knowing your worth and what you deserve
Tune in to hear the rest of this conversation and insight!!
//
Song: Soulmate by Lizzo
//
Connect with Hawa & her work:
- Instagram: @slflovetribe
- Podcast: The Self Love Tribe
//
If you liked this episode and are craving more conversations like this, here are some follow up episodes of In the Wake with Whytli to relisten to:
- Episode 82 - Self Compassion and Softening Your Inner Critic
- Episode 62 - Rewriting the Stories We Tell Ourselves with Sabrina Pierotti
- Episode 59 - Setting Personal Boundaries with Raven Robinson
- Episode 53 - Limiting Beliefs and Intentional Happiness with Julie Leonard
- Episode 41 - Breaking Your Destructive Cycles
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Dr. Nazanin Moali is a licensed clinical psychologist and a certified Sex Therapist. Her private practice is located in Torrance and she specializes in working with couples and individuals struggling with issues of sex and intimacy.
Dr. Moali hosts a weekly podcast called Sexology introducing the most intriguing findings in psychology of sex and intimacy. Sexology podcast was launched four years ago and it has over 60,000 downloads per month and It has been listened to in over 82 countries.
In this episode, Dr. Moali shares how she's been on both ends as the client and now the therapist -- she went to see a sex therapist with a partner and after it changed her life, she became interested in specializing in sex therapy herself. We unpack the harmful and shameful messaging women generally receive around sex and how that negatively affects their sexuality, sex lives, and self image. We also discuss the importance of sex and consent education when developing a healthy sexual relationship.
We cover the following topics:
- How she got into this line of work & being on the receiving end of sex therapy
- Stigmas & shameful messaging around sex & sexuality
- What our current sex education is generally lacking
- Talking about sex & consent with your children
- Cultivating & embracing your sexual self
- Feeling empowered to find pleasure
Tune in to hear more wisdom from the Dr. herself!!
//
Connect with Dr. Moali & her work:
- Podcast: Sexology
- Website: oasis2care.com
- Instagram: @sexologypodcast
//
Additional In the Wake Podcast Episodes:
- Episode 11 - Teaching Consent to Kids & Teens
- Episode 37 - Body Shaming, Modesty, & Puritan Culture with Angelina Hill
- Episode 70 - Sexual Assault, Consent Education, & Victim Blaming with Katie McMahon
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
TRIGGER WARNING
This is a heavier episode as we speak of sexual abuse, childhood trauma, and incest. If you are a survivor of abuse, incest, or sexual assault, please listen with caution or skip this episode entirely. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or trigger negative thoughts or emotions. Please practice self care, reach out to a trusted love one, and/or CALL RAINN's National Sexual Assault Hotline at 800.656.HOPE (4673) or TEXT their Live Chat here.
//
Author and filmmaker Annie Margis is a childhood incest victim working to give millions of victims a voice by wiping out the taboo against talking about incest. In 2012, with the support of a cadre of volunteers, she created a helpline where adult victims from around the world connect with fellow survivors and share their stories. Having heard thousands of tragic personal histories, Annie is a front-line expert on the life-long impact of childhood incest.
In this episode, Annie shares her story and how her abuse affected her entire childhood. She describes childhood incest and abuse as "the #MeToo that's still taboo." Through writing her book, The Ugliest Word, she has opened up the conversation around childhood incest and shed light on the shame and stigma that drives silence of survivors.
She shares about the following:
- Her story of childhood incest
- How the abuse affected her entire childhood
- How triggers and trauma manifested
- How stigma and shame plays a part as a survivor of incest
- Healing through writing and sharing her story through helplines
- How to respond to a survivor
Tune in to hear the rest of her story!
//
Connect with Annie & her work:
- Website: theugliestword.com
- Book: The Ugliest Word by Annie Margis
- Email: annie@theugliestword.com
- Facebook:
- The Ugliest Word
- Annie Margis
- Instagram: @theugliestword
- Twitter: @theugliestword
//
Song: It's A Wonderful World by Louis Armstrong
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Last year, I had a breakthrough in therapy that led me to realize just how self critical and perfectionistic I was. After coming to terms with the suffering I was creating for myself, I began to work through a Self Compassion workbook during my therapy sessions. This workbook teaches the three components needed to build a self compassionate voice: mindfulness, common humanity, and self kindness.
In this solo episode, I relay some key things I have learned along the way on my self growth journey. I dive deeper into the following:
- A Valentine's message
- My breakthrough in therapy surrounding self compassion
- Self compassionate motivation and perfectionism
- 3 components of self compassion: mindfulness, common humanity, and self kindness
- Rephrasing the narratives of your inner critic
- Finding your self love language
Tune in to hear more!!
//
Resources:
- selfcompassion.org
- Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Dr. Kristin Neff
- A Mindful Self Compassion Workbook by Dr. Kristin Neff (the workbook I mentioned several times in this episode)
- The Mindful Path to Self Compassion: Freeing Yourself from Destructive Thoughts and Emotions by Christopher Germer
//
Song: Good Job by Alicia Keys
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Shu Matsuo Post is a successful business person in Japan, one of the most gender-rigid nations on the planet. When he got married and chose to take his wife’s name, the opposition he encountered gave him an unexpected glimpse into a woman’s world. It also gave him a taste of vulnerability, emotional connection, and the freedom he had been craving all his life.
Flowing seamlessly between his own journey, his wife’s journey, and their journey together as they struggled to break the bonds of gender limitations, his debut book, I Took Her Name, is a powerful roadmap for defying expectations and becoming your authentic self.
In this episode, Shu shares his "feminist awakening" where he experienced a large perspective shift in his life after marrying his wife and changing his last name. He now fights alongside the feminist movement for gender equality and a dismantling of the patriarchy. Shu strongly believes that the patriarchy is responsible for the rigid gender norms that also put men into boxes and enables toxic masculinity.
Shu and I chat about the following:
- Stigmas around feminism and calling yourself a feminist as a man
- Shu's journey into feminism
- Why the patriarchy is also harmful for men
- How he's actively fighting for gender equality and what that means
- How feminism sets men free from gender norms and societal expectations of manhood
- Commonly used sexist phrases and why they're harmful
Tune in to hear the rest of Shu's story and insights!!
//
Connect with Shu and his work:
- Instagram: @shumatsuopost
- Facebook: @ITookHerName
- Websites:
- shumatsuopost.com/en
- itookhername.com
- Book: I Took Her Name by Shu Matsuo Post
//
More Resources:
- Ted Talk: The Urgency of Intersectionality by Kimberlé Crenshaw
- Podcast: Intersectionality Matters! with Kimberlé Crenshaw
- In the Wake Episodes:
- Intersectional Feminism with Renee Powers
- Dismantling Toxic Masculinity with Spencer Rogers
//
Song: Run The World (Girls) by Beyonce
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Brianne Leeson is an artist and small business owner from Dallas, Texas. She is also the creator of the scripted comedy/fiction podcast Today’s Lucky Winner.
Brianne was diagnosed in her thirties with ADHD which led her to a whole new realm of self discovery and understanding. She began to realize how her ADHD brain had affected or amplified different things throughout growing up including her relationship with her body and an eating disorder. With the knowledge she has of herself now, she is able to adapt and cope with her differences and advocate for her specific needs.
We discuss the following:
- Being diagnosed with ADHD in her thirties
- Myths, stigmas, and misunderstandings around ADHD and eating disorders
- Her relationship with food and her body growing up
- Her day to day experiences, thoughts, and situations that arise with ADHD
- How ADHD and eating disorders can intersect and affect one another
- What coping skills work for her
Tune in to hear the rest of her story and insights!
//
Connect with Brianne & her work:
- Instagram:
- @brianne_leeson
- @bellonaarts
- @luckywinnershow
- Podcast: Today's Lucky Winner Show
- Website: www.bellonaarts.com
//
Resources:
- Apps:
- Tiimo App - Visual Planner
- Mood Meter App - Build Emotional Intelligence
- Instagram follows:
- @adhd_alien
- @adhd_bri
//
Song: Charity by Yungblud
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Hannah is a Feminine Healer helping womxn connect with their inner child and soul selves to heal trauma and energy blockages. She is a chronic disease/pain warrior, a recovering alcoholic, and a childhood trauma survivor and like the rest of us, her healing journey is ongoing. After years of fighting her own body, struggling to survive through cycles of healing, and ultimately self sabotaging until she didn't know any other lifestyle; she was finally able to answer the sweet whispers of intuition.
In Hannah's newly release book, Entering the Divine, One Breath at a Time, Hannah dives into her childhood traumas, alcohol addiction, and life with multiple chronic diseases to leave you with one message: be an active participant in your healing journey.
In this episode, Hannah shares her story recovering from addiction and in the process, finding her self and her connection with the Divine. As a high functioning alcoholic, she didn't even realize she had a problem until she made the commitment to quit drinking for a period of time. Through sobriety and self reflection, she realized she had been using alcohol to cope for so long that she didn't even know how to enjoy alcohol anymore without binging. Sobriety forced her to process and heal from all of her childhood and adult traumas that she had been suppressing and numbing out with alcohol. She became an active advocate for her own well being and healing and in doing so, found her purpose in helping other womxn find healing.
Hannah and I discuss the following:
- Being a high functioning alcoholic
- Numbing out with alcohol & drugs
- Stigmas or misunderstandings around spirituality
- Sobriety & healing
- Being an advocate for your own well being and healing
- Learning to surrender and trust
- Her spiritual practices
Tune in to hear more of Hannah's wise insight!
//
Song: All You Need Is Love by The Beatles
//
Connect with Hannah and her work:
- Instagram: @healing.with.hannah
- Facebook: Healing with Yogi Han
- Website: healingwithhannah.ca
- Book: Entering the Divine, One Breath at a Time by Hannah Stinson
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
TRIGGER WARNING
This is a heavier episode as graphic details and scenarios of suicide are shared. If you are suffering or recovering from a mood or mental disorder and/or suicide ideation, please listen with caution, listen with a trusted friend, or choose to skip this episode. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things discussed in this episode to set you back in your healing journey or trigger negative thoughts or feelings. Also, if you are a bit more sensitive or an empath, you also may want to listen with caution. Please practice self care, reach out to a trusted loved one or professional and/or CALL the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 800-273-8255 or TEXT the Crisis Text Line at 741741.
//
Dr. Uchenna Umeh graduated from medical school in Nigeria in 1991. She relocated to the United States in 1994 for her pediatric residency at Howard University hospital. In 1999, she moved to South Carolina with her young family to open her own private practice where she worked until she sold it and joined the United States Air Force in 2012 as a lieutenant colonel and commander.
She is currently a global speaker on youth suicide prevention, 3-time bestselling author, and mother of three. She is the CEO of Teen Alive, and Dr. Lulu’s Youth Health Center, both dedicated to at-risk youth and youth suicide prevention.
Her public speaking career followed a suicide attempt by a 7-yr-old patient and suicides of colleagues and a patient. Ever since, she has dedicated her life’s work to ending youth suicide.
//
In this episode, Dr. Uchenna shares her passion and understanding of youth suicide prevention and awareness. She takes us through multiple scenarios and real life situations. While doing so, she points out warning signs and things to look out for along with a message of hope to both parents and those who may be experiencing suicidal ideation.
During our conversation, Dr. Uchenna covers the following:
- Her story getting into this work
- ACEs - Averse Childhood Experiences
- Looking at suicide from a trauma standpoint vs. a mental illness standpoint
- Warning signs or red flags of suicidal ideation
- Suicide prevention and awareness
- A message of hope
Tune in to hear more from the doctor herself!!
//
Connect with Dr. Uchenna and her work:
- Facebook: Ask Doctor Lulu
- Instagram: @askdoctorlulu
- Website:
- teenalive.com
- youthhealthcenter.com
- Podcast: Suicide Pages with Dr. Lulu
- TEDx Talk: Trauma in Children: What You Can Do to Help
//
End The Stigma - the teen mental health foundation that I'm a co-founder of:
- endthestigma.org
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Aubree is a self-worth coach and host of the podcast Ask Aubree, where she focuses on helping women and queer people to befriend their inner critic, break up with people-pleasing, and reclaim their desire.
In this episode, Aubree shares her personal experience being in codependent relationships along with her discovery of the root insecurity, fear, or beliefs underneath codependency. She now helps others recover and learn to source their identity from within rather than from their relationships. If you've never heard of the term, Aubree breaks codependency down and explains how it may show up in different types of relationships.
We discuss the following:
- What codependency is and what it looks like within relationships
- Her personal experiences with codependency and abusive, toxic relationships
- Myths about codependency
- How codependency may show up in all sorts of relationships - familial, parental, romantic, or friendships
- Why codependent relationships are unhealthy, harmful, or toxic
- Uncovering the root insecurity, fear, or belief behind codependency
- Healing and recovering from codependency
Tune in to hear the rest from Aubree herself!!
//
Song: Chicago by Sufjan Stevens
//
Resource:
- Book: Codependent No More by Melody Beattie
//
Connect with Aubree & her work:
- Instagram: @ahhhhbree
- Podcast: Ask Aubree
- Website: www.aubreehenderson.com
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
In this solo episode, I share my thoughts after reflecting on 2020. I talk about how I'm extending grace and compassion to myself for surviving this collectively difficult and long year. When wishing to set New Year's goals, I dive into the reasons I have not succeeded with goal setting in the past. My new process and approach has included setting goals out of inspiration vs. shame, no longer expecting perfection from myself, and redefining productivity. Tune in to hear ideas and tips for reflecting on your year, setting goals, and tracking your progress!
I dive deeper into the following:
- Reflecting on 2020 with grace and self compassion
- Breaking the cycles of shame, unrealistic expectations, and disappointment around setting goals for the New Year
- Setting a word or intention of the year
- Breaking your intention of the year down into digestible increments -- weekly, monthly, or quarterly goals
- Combatting perfectionism within goal setting
- Course correcting and realigning with your goals and intentions without giving up all together
- Redefining productivity and building in rest and play
- Bullet journaling to track your progress, goals, and habits
Tune in to hear my personal process of reflection and New Year intention setting!!
//
- Click here for my blog post full of resources mentioned, with guided journals, apps, and journaling challenges.
//
Song: All Will Be Well by The Gabe Dixon Band
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Yewande is a young lawyer in Lagos, Nigeria. She is a passionate speaker and unfiltered digital creator. She shares her raw and authentic skin care journey online in hopes to show and teach others that you can feel beautiful, confident, and strong despite the often unrealistic and unattainable beauty standards shown on social media.
In this episode, Yewande shares her story about how she broke free from the pressures to look a certain way and embraced her authentic self. She began taking off the filters when she started sharing her skin care journey on social media. She slowly learned to detach her sense of self worth from her physical appearance and redefined what it meant to be beautiful to her. She now uses things like makeup as a fun tool for expression rather than using it as a crutch to hide behind and a necessity to feel good enough.
We chat about the following:
- Why she became fed up with the filters, makeup, and expectations to always look perfect
- Dissecting unrealistic beauty standards
- Her definition of beauty
- How the comparison game can harm your mental health and self image
- Learning to love and accept your raw self
- The physical and mental aspects of self care
Tune in to hear from the radiant Yewande herself!!
Song: Before I Go by Guy Sebastian
//
Connect with Yewande and her work:
- Instagram:
- @dudulewami
- @yewande_badiru
- YouTube: Dudulewami DLM
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
TRIGGER WARNING
This is a heavier episode as we speak of physical and emotional abuse. If you are a survivor of abuse or sexual assault, please listen with caution or skip this episode entirely. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or trigger negative thoughts or emotions. Please practice self care, reach out to a trusted love one, and/or CALL the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1.800.799.7233 or TEXT to 1.800.787.3224.
//
Jenn Hazel Richards is currently in her last year of grad school to become a marriage and family therapist. She is a divorcee and survivor of domestic abuse. She has 6 children -- 4 living and twin daughters that died at birth. Jenn also has pet chickens and a passion for gardening and being active outdoors. She is living her most authentic life and constantly using her voice to speak her truth.
In this episode, Jenn shares her story and process leaving her abusive marriage and finding her voice, freedom, and self post-relationship. She explains the fears and belief systems that kept her stuck in that abusive marriage along with sharing the moments of awakening that pushed her to finally leave.
We discuss the following aspects of her story:
- Her story of physical and emotional abuse inflicted by her then husband
- Her awakening and deciding to leave her abusive marriage
- Why she decided to open up on social media about the abuse she's faced
- Experiencing backlash and having others try to silence her
- Taking her power back and finding her voice
- Signs of a healthy relationship vs. unhealthy or abusive relationship
- Challenging and unlearning old belief systems and thought patterns
- How fear kept her stuck
- Post relationship -- navigating healing, triggers, and dating
Tune in to hear the entirety of Jenn's story!!
//
Resources:
- Book: Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft
- RAINN - Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network
- We Are HER - Foundation supporting survivors of domestic abuse and sexual violence
- In the Wake Episode 64: Toxic Relationships with Dr. Rhoberta Shaler
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Song: Praying by Kesha
//
Connect with Jenn on social media:
- Instagram: @jennhazelishappy
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Jalisa is a native Texan with a passion for mental health and helping those that can relate. She works in the medical industry and knows the ins and outs of getting help with or without insurance. She battles depression and anxiety herself and shares her story in hopes of making sure people know they are not alone in the struggle.
In this episode, Jalisa shares the intricacies of battling anxiety and depression while keeping up and working in the corporate world. She shares how she has learned to cope and her tips to finding the best therapist.
We discuss the following:
- The signs as her mental health deteriorated
- Her story battling anxiety and depression
- Struggling with depression in the corporate world and advocating for your own mental health
- Knowing your triggers for anxiety
- Tips when searching for the right therapist for you
- Coping mechanisms that have worked for Jalisa
- Breaking down stigma around mental illness
Tune in to hear the rest of Jalisa's story!!
//
Song: Lovely by Billie Eilish
//
Resources:
- BetterHelp - Online Counseling Services
- Psychology Today - Find a Therapist
- EndTheStigma.org - Mental Health Foundation
- Instagram:
- @the_depression_chronicles11
- @endthestigmaorg
//
Connect with Jalisa and her work:
- Podcast: Kinda Pretty, Definitely Petty
- Instagram: @kindapretty.definitelypetty
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Trigger Warning
This is a heavier episode as we speak of eating disorders, habits of binging and restricting, triggers, diet culture, and recovery. If you are suffering or recovering from an eating disorder or body dysmorphia, please listen with caution or skip this episode entirely. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or trigger negative thoughts or emotions.
//
Rachel is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with over 12 years of experience treating Eating Disorders at both an inpatient treatment center and in private practice where she focuses on guiding adolescents and women to break free from diet culture and stop evaluating their worth by the number on the scale. Rachel is also the co-host of Mom Genes The Podcast, where she and colleague Tina LaBoy, RD, teach parents to understand their genes so they can love the jeans they are in.
In this episode, as an Eating Disorder Specialist, Rachel unpacks what struggling with an eating disorder entails and what healing one's relationship with food and their body may look like. She helps me dissect diet culture and the many harms and issues it creates for everyone in society but especially those struggling with an eating disorder, disordered eating behaviors, or body dysmorphia.
She goes over the following:
- Defining and explaining the differences between eating disorders -- anorexia, bulimia, and binge eating
- Stigmas or misconceptions around eating disorders
- Warning signs or symptoms to look out for
- Assessing your relationship with food & your body
- How to approach & support someone with an eating disorder
- What recovery might look like
- Explaining what diet culture is and how to challenge it
- How diet culture can be triggering & harmful
- Intuitive & mindful eating
Tune in to hear from Rachel Coleman!!
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Song: Try by Colbie Caillat
//
Resources:
- Book: Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls by Mary Pipher
- Website: intuitiveeating.org
- Book: Intuitive Eating by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch
//
Connect with Rachel & her work:
- Websites:
- rachelcolemanceds.com
- momgenesthepodcast.com
- Instagram:
- @rachelcolemanmft
- @momgenesthepodcast
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Kini Chang is a practicing Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in Oakland, CA. Her passion and expertise is in intergenerational trauma, addressing systemic and historical trauma experienced by communities of color. She prides herself in a holistic approach to treatment where her modalities and interventions support and heal the whole person. She is also an Adjunct Professor of Psychology where she teaches graduate and undergraduate students at Holy Names University, Golden Gate University, and Ohlone College.
In previous podcast episodes, Whytli, along with many other guests, have briefly mentioned that they went through EMDR therapy when healing from their traumas. In this week's episode, we have EMDR therapist, Kini Chang, here to dive deeper into the subject, explaining what EMDR actually is, how it works, the healing benefits, and what a session might entail. Kini shares how she processed her own childhood trauma going through EMDR sessions. After the fact, she decided she wanted to one day specialize in EMDR therapy.
Kini covers the following topics:
- How she healed her abandonment issues through EMDR therapy
- What an EMDR session generally entails
- Addressing disassociation in trauma work
- Attachment-Focused EMDR vs. Intergenerational EMDR
- Self care post-therapy session
- Triggers and retraumatization
- Building in coping skills that stimulate happy hormones
- Coping with 2020
Tune in to hear it all from Kini herself!!
//
Resources:
- Better Help -- Online Counseling Services
- Psychology Today -- Find a Therapist
//
Connect with Kini & her work:
- Website: kinichang.com
- Instagram: @wellnesswithkini
//
Song: Scars to Your Beautiful by Alessia Cara
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
TRIGGER WARNING
This is a heavier episode as we speak of rape, sexual assault, and the criminal justice system. If you are suffering or recovering from a mood or mental disorder or are a victim of sexual assault, please listen with caution or skip this episode entirely. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or trigger negative thoughts or emotions.
//
Katie McMahon is a survivor of sexual assault and now turned advocate. Career-wise she is a speech therapist in K-12 Schools. She is the creator and host of Voices Not Victims, a platform to shatter silence, end shame, and amplify voices of healing, activism, and social justice. Katie is involved in curating educational material for Consent Education and believes prevention is the future.
In this episode, Katie shares her story of sexual assault. After she came home from traveling solo in a foreign country, she was on a high feeling so confident and independent. Once she was back home, she was sexually assaulted by a stranger, wrecking her confidence and sense of self. She takes us through what it was like reporting but not receiving justice as the criminal justice system failed her and played a role in victim blaming. In order to heal, she explored many different routes of healing from EMDR therapy to seeing a medicine man in Bali. She explains how important consent education is and how she's teaching her students to advocate for themselves and use their voices.
Katie shares more on the following:
- How the 2016 election sparked the fire beneath her activism and speaking up about her sexual assault
- PTSD and living in survival mode post assault
- How the criminal justice system failed her
- Exploring many forms of healing -- therapy, EMDR, energy healing, meditation, and a PTSD out patient program
- Shame and victim blaming
- Learning to take her power back and quit blaming herself
- Consent education
- Helping others find their voice
Tune in to hear the rest of her story and message!!
//
Resources:
- National Sexual Assault Hotline: Call 1.800.656.HOPE (4673)
- We Are HER
- RAINN - Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network
- Honey is Here
- In the Wake Episode 34: Rape Culture with Laura W
//
Check out Katie and her work:
- Podcast: Voices Not Victims
- Instagram: @voicesnotvictims
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Trigger Warning
If you have lost a loved one to cancer or other means, please listen with caution, listen with a trusted friend, or skip this episode entirely. In this episode, our guest may share graphic details or stories of her experiences watching her father battle cancer, losing him, and the aftermath of grief and trauma which may be triggering or hard to hear for some.
//
Jaclyn Renee is a 26 year old single mother residing in Virginia. She has kind of jumped around career-wise and finally landed her dream job in marketing, but was part of the mass lay-offs due to COVID-19. That's what led her to pursue her purpose and launch her podcast, A Parting Gift, which talks about her dealings with trauma, depression, anxiety, loss and abuse and what she's gained from those experiences.
Jaclyn skipped the majority of her senior year in high school to care for her father, who was battling cancer. When she was just eighteen years old, he passed away and she lost all motivation, leading her down a destructive path that involved partying and drinking constantly to numb out the pain. She self-isolated as she was struggling with her depression and Generalized Anxiety Disorder yet put up a strong front so everyone thought she was handling it all so well. Once she hit rock bottom -- broke, alone, failed out of college, and watching life pass her by while heavily medicated -- she decided to make a conscious effort to face her trauma head on. Through deep soul searching and inner work, she identified her triggers and unpacked her many childhood traumas while learning how to cope and show up to life in healthier ways.
Jaclyn shares more on the following points:
- Watching her father battle cancer
- Losing him during her senior year in high school
- Processing her grief
- The trauma and aftermath of loss
- Numbing out the pain with unhealthy coping measures
- Putting up a "strong" front but later realizing what true strength is
- Learning true forgiveness of others and self
- A message to those who have experienced loss
Tune into this episode to hear the rest of her story!!
//
Connect with Jaclyn & her work:
- Instagram:
- @apartinggiftpodcast
- @zahkleen
- Podcast: A Parting Gift
//
Song: Rise Up by Andra Day
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
TRIGGER WARNING
This is a heavier episode as our guest shares graphic details about his life-threatening battle with anorexia, mental health and recovery, and violence in childhood trauma. If you are suffering or recovering from an eating disorder, body dysmorphia, trauma, or a mood or mental disorder, please listen with caution, listen with a trusted friend, or skip this episode entirely. The last thing I would want is for sharing these things to set you back in your healing journey or trigger negative thoughts or emotions. Also, if you are extra sensitive or an empath, you also may want to listen with caution.
//
Non Wels is the creator of the podcast, You, Me, Empathy, and the founder of The Feely Human Collective, a space to grow our collective capacity for empathy, vulnerability, and emotional way finding.
Non would describe himself as, "just a silly boy with lots of feelings." He believes deeply in talking openly about our mental health. He once almost died from shutting off his heart to the world. Now he leads with his heart.
In this episode, he talks about the following:
- Living in an emotionally unsafe environment as a child
- His life threatening experiences with anorexia
- Controlling emotions through food & over exercising
- Healing childhood trauma through EMDR therapy
- Struggling with mental health as a man
- Rebelling against the shame & stigma around feeling emotions
- How vulnerability heals
- What empathy and open mindedness looks & feels like to him
- How empathy and vulnerability go hand in hand
Tune in to hear the rest of his story and why empathy and vulnerability have become so crucial to his life!!
//
Resources:
- Books:
- Anti-Diet by Christy Harrison
- Intuitive Eating by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch
- Podcast: Food Psych with Christy Harrison
- Course: Eating Disorder Recovery with Tiffany Roe
- Ted Talk: The Power of Vulnerability by Brene Brown
//
Connect with Non and his work:
- Podcast: You, Me, Empathy
- Website: FeelyHuman.co
- Instagram:
- @youmeempathy
- @feelyhuman
- Facebook: The Feely Human Collective
//
Song: This Year by The Mountain Goats
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Stephanie Dawn Elizabeth is an Intuitive Transformation Coach and the Host of Made of Magic: The Podcast. She's on a mission to change the idea that the magic we seek is somewhere outside of ourselves. She's here to help you awaken, embody, and amplify the magic you ALREADY have within you.
I personally have been soaking up all of Stephanie's intuitive and groundbreaking work for years now. It just so happens that when I began on my journey of self love and self growth, I somehow found her and listened to my very first podcast. I then experienced my first life coaching session with her. To this day, I am still doing her Magic Morning routine and journal prompts. She was a huge reason I believed in my own worth and voice and ended up starting a podcast of my own. So it was an honor to finally have her as a guest on my own show!
Stephanie allowed me to pick her brain on all things spirituality, manifestation, and intuition. She shares what it looks and feels like to be living in autopilot versus conscious, intentional living with your soul turned on. We discuss nuance to multiple spiritual concepts and dive into the harms of spiritual bypassing.
In this episode, we cover the following talking points:
- Stigmas, misconceptions, & fears around spirituality
- What intuition & inner guidance means and feels like for her
- Manifestation & intentionality
- Distinction between feelings of intuition vs. anxiety, fear, ego, or trauma
- Living in autopilot vs. your soul turned on
- Spiritual bypassing & the harms of 'good vibes only' spirituality
- The ability to hold multiple truths at the same time
- Nuance of law of attraction or manifestation
- Questioning your beliefs & being open to new perspective
Tune in to hear more from the intuitive guide herself!!
//
Connect with Stephanie and her work:
- Instagram: @stephaniedawnelizabeth
- Podcast: Made of Magic
- Website: www.youaremadeofmagic.com
- Magic Mornings
Artists:
- H.E.R.
- BANKS
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
TRIGGER WARNING
This is a heavier episode as we speak of rape, sexual assault, and slavery. If you are suffering or recovering from a mood or mental disorder or are a victim of sexual assault, please listen with caution or skip this episode entirely. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or trigger negative thoughts or emotions.
//
Cheyenne Tyler Jacobs is a creative, writer, and organizer based in Atlanta, GA. Her platform @shewillspeak, on Instagram, was the springboard, for her second book, The Tragic Type of Beautiful, published in May 2018. After the release of her second book, she founded the She Will Speak Series which hosts bi-annual anthologies. Her continued work involves tackling the issues of racism, sexual violence, and homelessness through art and education.
In this episode, Cheyenne takes us through her experiences and insights into what it looks like to be a survivor of rape while also being a Black woman and how the intersections of her identity affect each other. There a many barriers or added layers of trauma that survivors of color experience when it comes to reporting, whether they are believed or taken seriously, representation, and accessibility to treatment or support in healing.
We cover the following in this episode:
- Cheyenne's story - being raped during college by a white male athlete
- Barriers to reporting sexual assault as a Black woman
- How religion and purity culture brought immense shame after her assault
- The rollercoaster of healing and the importance of not rushing your healing process
- The history of rape within slavery and generational trauma
- What it looks like to be seen and understood as a survivor
- Changing the social narratives around rape, sexual assault, and abuse
Tune in for this crucial conversation with Cheyenne!!
//
Resources:
- @talkpuritytome on Instagram
- @survivorsofcolor on Instagram
- @imasurvivorinc on Instagram
- End Rape On Campus
- On The Record on HBO Max
//
Songs:
- Fight Song by Rachel Platten
- I Didn't Know My Own Strength by Whitney Houston
//
Connect with Cheyenne & her work:
- Website:
- www.shewillspeak.com
- www.shewillspeakseries.com
- Podcast: As I Was Saying with Cheyenne Tyler Jacobs
- Instagram:
- @shewillspeak
- @shewillspeakseries
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Renee Powers is the founder and CEO of Feminist Book Club, the premier online hub for intersectional readers that encourages resistance through reading with a monthly subscription box, blog, podcast, and meetups. She has completed her Bachelors, Masters, and PhD coursework in gender communication and is a trained racial justice facilitator through the YWCA. You can find her in Minneapolis where she lives with her spouse and their retired racing greyhound.
In this episode, Renee breaks down why we need to move away from purely white woman feminism into inclusive, intersectional feminism. Instead of fighting for just yourself, feminism is about fighting for the rights of ALL womxn. We discuss white fragility, white privilege, and white supremacy because as white women, we need to acknowledge the intersections of our identities and privileges and where we may fall into both the oppressed and the oppressor.
We dive deeper into the following:
- Waves of feminism
- Moving from white woman feminism to intersectional feminism
- Intersectionality between our identities
- Difference between equality, justice, & liberation
- What it means to be a feminist for her
- Trans inclusive feminism
- White privilege, white supremacy, & white fragility
- Tokenism vs. diversity
Tune in for this crucial conversation!!
//
Resources:
- Articles:
- Educate & Activate The 19th Amendment: History's Most Exclusive Sorority
- Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack by Peggy McIntosh
- Instagram Follow:
- @staceyabrams
- Books:
- How To Be An Anti-Racist by Ibram X. Kendi
- Hood Feminism: Notes From the Woman the Movement Forgot by Mikki Kendall
//
Songs:
- Praying by Kesha
- Here Comes The Change by Kesha
- Rich, White, Straight, Men by Kesha
- Woman by Kesha
- Learn to Let Go by Kesha
- Let 'Em Talk by Kesha
//
Connect with Renee's work:
- Website: www.feministbookclub.com
- Instagram: @feministbookclubbox
- Podcast: Feminist Book Club: The Podcast
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
The Relationship Help Doctor, Rhoberta Shaler, PhD, provides urgent and ongoing care for relationships in crisis. Even the United States Marines have called on her for help!
Dr. Shaler empowers the partners, exes, adult children, and co-workers of the relentlessly difficult, toxic people she calls Hijackals® to recognize emotional abuse, realize the effects, heal, and transform. She helps them see clearly, stop the crazy-making, and save their sanity. She defines Hijackals as “people who hijack relationships--for their own purposes--while relentlessly scavenging them for power, status, and control.”
Rhoberta offers the insights, strategies, and support you need to reclaim hope, confidence--and your sanity--when dealing with the constant uncertainty and jaw-dropping behaviors of Hijackals in your life, at home and at work. Author of sixteen books, including her Hijackal ebook series, she is the host of the popular podcast, listened to in more than seventy-five countries: Save Your Sanity: Help for Toxic Relationships. She is the former host of the Emotional Savvy channel on Binge TV Networks.
In this episode, we dive into the following:
- Rhoberta's story - having toxic parents and later finding herself in a marriage with another toxic person
- Enabling or excusing toxic behavior
- "Toxic" as a buzzword
- Toxic relationships with parents, friendships, and in the workplace
- Warning signs and red flags to look out for
- Cycle of abuse -- lovebombing / grooming, the 'gotcha' factor / devalue, hovering, & discard
Tune in to hear more from the wise expert herself!!
//
Connect with Dr. Rhoberta's work:
- Website: forrelationshiphelp.com
- Podcast: Save Your Sanity Podcast
- Dr. Rhoberta's series of books
- Instagram: @drrhobertashaler
- Facebook: Relationship Help Doctor
- LinkedIn: Rhoberta Shaler
//
Song: Gaslighter by The Chicks
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Trigger Warning
In this episode, we share detailed accounts of bingeing, restricting, body dysmorphia, and harmful beauty ideals. If you are suffering or recovering from an eating disorder, body dysmorphia, and/or mental disorder, please listen with caution or skip this episode entirely. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or to trigger negative thoughts or emotions.
//
Amari Pollard is 1/4 of the So-Called Oreos podcast, a podcast where four friends discuss topics on being labeled "too Black" or "too white" in society and how that impacts their everyday lives. In addition to being a podcaster, Amari is also a writer and audience development strategist currently studying strategic communication as a Roy H. Park Fellow at the UNC Hussman School of Journalism and Media.
In this episode, Amari shares personal stories from childhood, her high school and college days as an athlete, and present day in the pandemic dealing with body dysmorphia and disordered eating. We discuss the harmful beauty trends and societal messaging around bodies that can have negative impacts on one's own body image or relationship with food.
Amari stated, "My personal issues with food originally stemmed from being over sexualized as a child. At the age of 10, my classmates had started a rumor that I was pregnant, and so I thought that in order for people to stop discussing my body, I had to physically take up less space. For the last 15 years I've struggled to maintain a positive relationship with my body and food, and I've even noticed old, bad habits return during the pandemic."
We dive deeper into the following:
- The moments as a child that made her aware of her body
- Viewing her body through men's appreciation
- What body dysmorphia means / looks like
- Bingeing and restricting habits
- Disordered eating and body image as an athlete in high school vs. college
- Triggers in relationships around your body
- Harmful beauty trends and societal messaging around bodies
- Why representation of all types of bodies matters
- How social media affects your body image
Tune in to hear the rest of Amari's story and insights!!
//
Connect with Amari:
- Instagram:
- @amaridawn
- @socalledoreos
- Twitter:
- @amaripollard
- @socalledoreos
- Website:
- amaridawn.com
- socalledoreos.com
- Podcast: So Called Oreos
//
Song:
- Video by India Arie
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- TikTok: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Sabrina is the podcast host for the Cultivating Curiosity Podcast, a show dedicated to sharing people's stories and the wisdom within them. Sabrina balances the podcast with a full-time, corporate job as a fashion buyer for a large retailer. In addition, she is also currently training to become a voice-over actress, so you could say she likes to stay busy!
In this episode, Sabrina shares multiple examples of different stories she believed about herself and the world around her that were holding her back from living her fullest, most conscious life. She explains how she has shifted and rewritten those narratives and the different healing modalities or tools that have worked for her. She also talks about the routines and practices that have helped nourish her spiritual self and the importance of listening to your body's needs to truly love and take care of yourself.
We dive deeper into the following:
- Seeing a holistic therapist and energy healer
- Morning routines
- Learning to trust your inner guidance
- Right vs. left side of the brain
- What self-love means to her
- Working through shame and stigma around seeing a therapist
- Limiting beliefs
- Rewriting the stories we tell ourselves
- Allowing yourself to feel all your emotions both positive and negative
"Self-love means respecting my body for what it needs in this moment. Our bodies are in constant change just like everything else in this Universe. That means we aren't going to be 100% productive every day or 100% happy every day and that's okay. We're meant to have fluctuations within our emotions and our bodies and so we need to respect those fluctuations without any judgement." --Quoted from Sabrina in this episode
//
Resources:
- Jill Bolte Taylor
- Ted Talk: My Stroke of Insight
- Episode 29: Understanding the Brain & Its Reaction to Covid-19
- Alan Watts
- Authenticity Associates: Coaching & Counseling
//
Connect with Sabrina Pierotti:
- Podcast: Cultivating Curiosity
- Instagram: @sabripierotti
- Facebook: Sabri Pierotti
- Pinterest: Sabri Pierotti
- Email: sabpierotti@gmail.com
//
Song: The Bone by Maren Morris
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Dr. Margaret Rutherford has been a psychologist in private practice for over twenty-five years and is the author of Perfectly Hidden Depression: How to Break Free from the Perfectionism That Masks Your Depression, which was published in November 2019.
Margaret has been researching and writing on this topic for over five years, and she’s passionate about the message that although depression can be heavily masked by perfectionism, its damage can still be devastating to that someone who’s trying so hard to smile their way through growing loneliness and despair.
In this episode, Margaret helps break down perfectly hidden depression with me and provides some incredible insights including the following:
- Dangerous forms of perfectionism
- What denial of depression or perfectionism entails and why people may be in denial
- Denying struggle hidden through toxic or rigid positivity
- Factors of perfectly hidden depression
- Difference between self perfectionism, other perfectionism, and socially prescribed perfectionism
- Treating perfectly hidden depression
"Jon Kabat-Zinn uses the term 'Rigid Positivity,' because you can stay so rigidly in the mindset of 'Everything's great and I don't want to focus on anything bad, sad, or what make me angry because then I'm not being appreciative enough.' That is just as dangerous as someone who's constantly negative, constantly sad, or constantly looking for their victimization in their life. There should be a balance. I think healthier people most often stay in the glass half full but part of mental health is also being able to connect with what hurts, what's disappointing, or what you're afraid of. Connect with it, feel those feelings, and then move back to the glass half full. Recognize, understand, and respect that you have some hardship in your life -- we all do!" --Dr. Margaret Rutherford quoted from this episode.
Tune in to hear more from the wise Dr. Rutherford herself!
//
Connect or work with Dr. Rutherford:
- Website: drmargaretrutherford.com
- Book: Perfectly Hidden Depression by Dr. Margaret Rutherford
- Questionnaire
- Podcast: The Self Work Podcast
- Instagram: @drmargaretrutherford
- Facebook: Dr. Margaret Rutherford
- YouTube: DrMargaretRutherford
//
Song: Tapestry by Carole King
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Trigger Warning
This is a heavier episode as we speak of childhood abuse, addiction, and trauma. If you are suffering or recovering from a mood or mental disorder, an addiction, or are a victim of abuse, please listen with caution or skip this episode entirely. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or to trigger negative thoughts or emotions. Also, if you are a bit more sensitive or an empath, you also may want to listen with caution.
//
As a survivor of early childhood trauma and a recovered alcoholic, April looks to shatter the stigmas and shame that surround both these experiences. From age 2 to 5, she was sexually molested, starved, and beaten. After enduring these life-altering experiences that many people could not fathom, she went on to struggle emotionally in life for quite some time. This truly displayed itself later in adult life through addiction and other toxic relationships and behaviors.
Her purpose now is to be a voice for those suffering - to shed light on abuse, recovery, and the journey that it takes to dig through the pain and wreckage they both cause. She believes the veil needs to be lifted on the prevalence of child sexual abuse as well as sex trafficking. Survivors of abuse deserve a voice and the resources to help them overcome their trauma.
In this episode, April shares her raw and vulnerable story with us and how her childhood trauma led her to self-medicate and fall into an alcohol addiction. She went through a rehab program at a facility where they addressed healing both the trauma and addiction. After working with her sponsor, attending AA meetings, and doing the hard inner work, she is currently sober and thriving as an advocate, podcaster, and owner of The Hills Beauty Lounge Day & Med Spa.
April takes us through her rock bottom and the turning point that led her to where she is now. We discuss the myths and stigmas around addiction and abuse, lingering triggers from her trauma, and what self care practices work for her.
"Whether it was with my addiction or trauma, there was always a lack of self love and I felt almost as if I didn't deserve good things." - April Hill (quoted from this episode)
Tune in to hear the rest of her powerful story and what her healing journey has entailed.
//
Connect with April Hill:
- Website: abuserecoverysuccess.org
- Instagram: @april_thehills
//
Resource:
- Street Light USA
//
Song: Hello by Adele
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
{ Use promo code: WAKE for $5 off The Way Thru Boundaries Workbook }
Raven Delana is the Founder, Strategist and Coach at The Way Thru. She works to support your creative vision as a mirror to help you see your blind spots, a magnifying glass to bring your vision into focus, and a spotlight on your shadows so that you can do the work required up-level your creative venture and contribute to your community in meaningful ways.
With over 15 years of experience developing marketing and operational strategies for solo business owners, Raven is on a mission to help other perfectly imperfect visionaries work through the barriers and get their work into the world using mindful practices such as self-care, meditation, and yoga.
In this episode, we dissect boundaries and the work and conversations around boundary setting. Boundaries sometimes get a negative reputation (for lack of better words) but I learned so much from Raven during this discussion and would hope you listen in with an open mind eager to learn as well. Raven takes us through the following:
- Myths, misconceptions, and stigmas around what boundaries are
- Countering those misconceptions to define what boundaries actually are
- Defining the differences between porous, rigid, and healthy boundaries
- Framework for boundary setting
- Getting clear on your values
- Listening to your body when it comes to boundaries
- Consequences vs. punishment
- Verbal and non-verbal boundary setting
- How to have those hard conversations around boundaries
- Honoring other people's boundaries
Integrity + Self Advocacy = Boundaries
"My definition of integrity is when all of the things about you match up -- your thoughts, your actions, your beliefs, your value set -- all of these things should align. When that happens, you then have to advocate for yourself based on those things and that's when you begin to set boundaries." -Raven Robinson (quoted from this episode)
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Connect with Raven and her work:
- Instagram: @thewaythru
- Website: thewaythru.com
- Workbook: The Way Thru Boundaries: A Workbook with Raven Delana
- USE PROMO CODE: WAKE for $5 off
//
Song: I Get Out by Lauryn Hill
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram: @whytli or @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Kerrian Fournier is the CEO and Founder of Vybrante Ventures, a professional services
company dedicated to unlocking the highest level of performance for innovative companies, teams, and professionals by igniting their vibrancy and innovation. She is certified as an Executive Coach and is passionate about unleashing everyone’s highest selves. Kerrian splits her time between NYC and Long Island and is a divorced mother to a #TheFutureIsFemale 15-yr old daughter, Isabella.
In this episode, Kerrian and I discuss the comparison trap we all sometimes find ourselves in and how to consciously shift those patterns. It can suck us dry of life and energy when we find ourselves in a loop of judgment, comparison, and jealousy. Kerrian shares how it changes a person and what to do about it. After her 'Trinity of Trauma' she began to show up to her life in a whole new light. In this episode we will cover the following:
- Comparison trap
- Moving from judgment to curiosity
- Balancing your energy
- Finding exploration vs. setting expectations
Tune in to hear more from Kerrian herself!!
//
Connect with Kerrian:
- Website: vybrante.com
- Instagram: @vybrante_ventures
- Facebook: Vybrante Ventures
- LinkedIn: Kerrian Fournier
//
Song: You Gotta Be by Des'ree
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram:
- @whytli
- @inthewakewithwhytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Pinterest: Whytli
- Twitter: @whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
As a Family Therapist for over 20 years, Jodi empowers people to become their own healer. As an anxiety survivor and a mom of teens, Jodi totally gets it. Her TEDxWilmington talk, “Calm Anxious Kids,” and her new book, Anxiety…I'm So Done with You! are changing the way we understand the current mental health crisis.
In this episode, Jodi shares her perspective and insight into anxiety and coping/curing that anxiety. She busts myths society has regarding anxiety, shares tips for parenting kids with anxiety, discusses teen mental health, and how social media and phone usage is affecting our collective mental health. She shares her own battle with anxiety and how she overcame that and healed.
"You know when anxiety says, 'Stay home! You can't handle that and you might be uncomfortable,' anxiety is making you miss opportunities, fun, adventure, and good times with people. In that moment, anxiety is not really protecting you but rather causing you to suffer a lot more." -Jodi Aman
Tune in to hear more from Jodi Aman herself!!
//
6 Steps to Coping With Your Anxiety:
- Understanding anxiety biologically
- Learning the lies that anxiety tells you
- Cultivating your control - connecting to your personal agency
- Forgiving yourself
- Affirmations and changing your beliefs
- Practicing self care
//
3 Ways Social Media is Affecting Our Mental Health:
- Comparison: Increases negative judgement of self
- Worldwide Trauma Exposure: Through spread of news & media, exposed to worldwide trauma & acts of violence but left feeling helpless
- Commercial Advertising: Thinking we should get the next best thing just because everyone else is doing it & never feeling like what we have is good enough
//
Jodi's Work:
- Website: jodiaman.com
- Let Go - Free Audio Training
- Books:
- Anxiety... I'm So Done With You
- You: 1 Anxiety: 0
- Anxiety & Panic Workbook
- Tedx Talk: Suck It Up! Calm Anxious Kids
- YouTube: Jodi Aman
- Anxiety Symptoms
- Why You Think Anxiety Is Not Curable
- Instagram: @jodiamanlove
- Facebook: Jodi Aman Love
//
Song:
Let the Sunshine In by Milk and Sugar
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram: @whytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.c
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Trigger Warning
This is a heavier episode as we speak of rape, sexual assault, self-harm, and mental health. If you are suffering or recovering from a mood or mental disorder and/or are a victim of sexual assault or abuse, please listen with caution or skip this episode. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or to trigger negative thoughts or emotions. Also, if you are a bit more sensitive or an empath, you also may want to listen with caution.
//
Felicia Dawn Conner is a mystic, guide, and mother. She is also a survivor of child sexual abuse and the host of HERE Podcast. She is dedicated to supporting people on their healing journey so they can thrive after trauma.
In this episode, Felicia recalls her memories as a young child being molested by her friend's father. She experienced sexual abuse for a year-long period as an 11 year old and her life felt the rippling effects of that trauma for years later. She despised her body because of the abuse it faced and began self-harming and self-medicating to numb out the pain. She has recently felt healing and a bit of relief through sharing her story on her own podcast, HERE. She has learned to reconnect and listen to her body through Buddhist practices, yoga, meditation, chakras and more.
Tune into this episode to hear the rest of her story, what healing has felt like to her, and a bit of advice to parents.
//
Connect with Felicia:
- Website:
- herepodcast.com
- feliciadawnconner.com
- Instagram:
- @herepodcast
- @feliciadawnconner
//
Song: Angel by Sarah Mclachlan
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram: @whytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Dr. Lucretia Berry is the creator of Brownicity, an (In)Courage contributor, a wife, and mom of 3. As a former college professor learning to courageously create the world she knows is possible, she has self-published a book and rocked a TED talk.
In this episode, Dr. Berry shares the stories behind creating Brownicity and how it all started with teaching her own children of mixed race about skin tone, race, and racism.
We discuss the following:
- Brownicity's slogan "Many Hues, One Humanity"
- The differences between claiming to be 'non-racist' versus being actively anti-racist
- Implicit bias and how it plays a role in racism
- Common phrases like color blindness being weaponized and used to bypass conversations of race
- The importance of talking to your young children about these topics
- What racial healing means to Dr. Berry
Tune in to hear more from the wise and insightful Dr. Lucretia Berry! If you'd like to hear more from her, check out the many resources below.
//
Resources:
- Website: Brownicity.com
- Anti Racism Education Membership
- Resource Library
- Book: What Lies Between Us by Dr. Lucretia Berry
- Tedx Talk: Children Will Light Up The World If We Don't Keep Them In The Dark
- Facebook:
- Lucretia O. Berry
- Brownicity
- Instagram:
- @lucretiaberry
- @brownicity
//
Song: Kingdom Come by Sanchez Fair
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram: @whytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Trigger Warning
This is a heavier episode as we speak of rape, eating disorders, and mental health. If you are suffering or recovering from a mood or mental disorder and/or a victim of sexual assault or abuse, please listen with caution or skip this episode. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or to trigger negative thoughts or emotions. Also, if you are a bit more sensitive or an empath, you also may want to listen with caution.
//
Kristine Irwin is a wife, mother, and advocate for ending sexual violence. She strives to bring change to our culture. Besides her family and her day job, she runs a non-profit called Voices of Hope. The non-profit allows her to educate audiences on ways to prevent rape and sexual assault. She is a popular speaker at universities, organizations, and corporations globally.
Kristine was raped by an acquaintance during her freshman year of college. She wrote a book sharing her story along with the stories of her family and friends and how her assault affected and changed them as well. As she has navigated healing, triggers, and her book, she also started a non-profit and podcast to share others' stories and provide resources and support. In this episode, Kristine and I talk more in-depth about her story, the aftermath, her healing process, and advocacy. Tune in to hear from the voice of hope!!
//
Kristine's Work:
- Website: www.voices-of-hope.org
- Podcast: Unveil Your Voice
- Instagram: @voicesofhope_
- Facebook: Voices Of Hope 2015
- Twitter: @Voicesofhope15
- Books:
- Voices of Hope by Kristine Irwin
- Made to Overcome by Chou Hallegra
- Healing the Soul of a Woman by Joyce Meyer
//
Songs:
- Fighter by Christina Aguilera
- Grey Street by Dave Matthews Band
- Rain On Me by Lady Gaga
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram: @whytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Julie Leonard is Happiness Evangelist, Life Coach, and speaker. With 30 years of Psychology, Health and Coaching experience, she helps women break through their limiting beliefs to change their life and feel truly happy.
In her youth, she was always an anxious, shy, worrisome, and sensitive person. She never felt good enough or like her opinion and voice mattered. She was able to let go of these limiting beliefs that were holding her back and transform her life. She uses intention, gratitude, purpose, and self-love to create true happiness in her life.
Tune in to hear the rest of her story along with her mindset and strategies to let go of limiting beliefs and be intentional about your happiness.
//
Connect and work with Julie:
- Website: julieleonardcoaching.com
- Facebook Group: The Happiness Club
- Happiness Quiz: How Happy Are You?
- Instagram: @julieleonardcoaching
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram: @whytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Khadijah Tishan Washington is a licensed therapist, social worker, and newly-published author. Her memoir, REAL: Radical, Empathetic, Acceptance of Life released the same week that news of George Floyd's death began circulating and in her words, this 'racial pandemic' began.
In this episode, we discuss the layers to her story as a generational trauma breaker. We touch on the topics of race, claiming colorblindness, behind the scenes of a social worker, mental health, and more. Tune in to hear more of her wisdom and truth!
//
Connect with Khadijah:
- Book: REAL: Radical, Empathetic, Acceptance of Life by Khadijah Washington
- Website: khadijahtishan.com
- LinkedIn: Khadijah Tishan
- Instagram: @khadijahtishan
- Facebook: Kt Washington
- Twitter: @khadijahtishan
- Survey: Generational Trauma
//
Songs:
- Anyone by Demi Lovato
- I'm Dope by Tobe Nwigwe
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram: @whytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Pinterest: Whytli
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Erika shares her experiences with anxiety and panic attacks and how she had to integrate self compassion and self care to help ease her struggles with anxiety. Her entire life she had been taking care of others, from helping raise her siblings to becoming a young mom and later having a plate full with four kids, a husband, and job. She finally started putting her needs first and taking care of herself and it made a world of a difference in her life. Tune in to hear her entire story!
//
Connect with Erika:
- Email: 4iluvme.2@gmail.com
- Instagram: @erikadannelle
- Facebook: Erika Danelle
//
Song: Dear God by Smokie Norful
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey here.
- Instagram: @whytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
We are podcasters united to condemn the tragic murders of George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, and many many others at the hands of police. This is a continuation of the systemic racism pervasive in our country since its inception, and we are committed to standing against racism in all its forms.
We believe that to be silent is to be complicit.
We believe that Black lives matter.
We believe that Black lives are more important than property.
We believe that we have a responsibility to use our platforms to speak out against this injustice whenever and wherever we are witnesses to it.
*In creating digital media we have built audiences that return week after week to hear our voices, and we will use our voices to speak against anti-blackness and police brutality, and we encourage our audiences to be educated, engaged, and to take action.
//*#PodcastersForJustice campaign created by WOC Podcasters.
//Donate:
- Black Visions Collective
- Campaign Zero
- Black Lives Matter
- Black Owned Businesses Directory
Take Action:
- Color of Change - Find campaigns & sign petitions
Books to Read:
- Me and White Supremacy by Layla F. Saad
- White Fragility by Robin DiAngelo
- So You Want to Talk About Race by Ijeoma Oluo
- How To Be Anti-Racist by Ibram X. Kendi
- Mindful of Race by Ruth King
Podcasts:
- Code Switch by NPR
- About Race with Reni Eddo-Lodge
- Speaking of Racism
- While Black
Movies:
- Selma
- Just Mercy
- Harriet
Activists to Follow:
- Rachel E. Cargle
- Austin Channing Brown
- Check Your Privilege
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Trigger Warning
This is a heavier episode as we speak of domestic violence and abuse. If you are suffering or recovering from a mood or mental disorder and/or are a victim of sexual assault and abuse, please listen with caution or skip this episode. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or to trigger negative thoughts or emotions. Also, if you are a bit more sensitive or an empath, you also may want to listen with caution.
//
I met Ty through SafeNest -- an organization, shelter, and place of safety and support for survivors and victims of domestic violence. We were both going through the training to become a volunteer through the organization.
In this week's episode, Ty shares his experiences growing up witnessing his grandma be abused by his grandpa. We then discuss factors, warnings signs, myths, and advocacy for abuse victims. Tune in to hear his whole story!
//
Resources:
- SafeNest
- SafeNest Domestic Violence Hotline: (702) 646-4981.
- National Domestic Violence Hotline: +1(800) 799-7233
- Book: Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft
To connect with Ty:
- Facebook: Ty Newport
- Instagram: @theamazingty
Song: Float On by Modest Mouse
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram: @whytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Ellen coaches others on learning more about what stresses them out and how to ease, manage, or eliminate that stress. In this episode, Ellen shares with us her understanding of her own stress and her three steps to deal with that stress. Instead of throwing general stress relievers at you, we dive deeper into the root of stress and how to heal it depending on the individual self. Here are Ellen's three steps to discovering the root of your stress:
- Be specific as to what is stressing you out in particular
- How do you react when stressed out: Physically, Emotionally, or Mentally
- Take action - How can you relieve or counter that stress?
//
Resources:
- Website: ellen-leonard.com
- Podcast: The Healthy, Happy, and Mostly Sane Entrepreneur
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram: @whytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Twitter: @whytli
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Trigger Warning
This is a heavier episode as we speak of domestic violence and abuse. If you are suffering or recovering from a mood or mental disorder and/or are a victim of sexual assault or abuse, please listen with caution or skip this episode. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or to trigger negative thoughts or emotions. Also, if you are a bit more sensitive or an empath, you also may want to listen with caution.
In this episode, Angela recalls her childhood where her mother was in multiple abusive relationships, and how she later found herself in the same situation in her marriage. Then, down the road, her own daughter was in an abusive relationship, which was the catalyst to Angela getting a bill passed in New York to help protect victims reporting domestic violence. Angela is an empowering voice for change, healing, and survival. Listen in for her whole story!
//
Resources:
- You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay
- Instagram: @angelaccomando
- Website: angelaaccomando.com
- Podcast: Meditate On This
//
Songs:
- Just Dance by Lady Gaga
- I'm Still Standing by Elton John
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram: @whytli
- Twitter: @whytli
- Facebook: Whytli Rogers
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Nicole Burgess is a licensed marriage and family therapist and leadership coach to introverted, sensitive, high achieving professional women. She is also the host of Soulfilled Sisterhood podcast and founder of the Self-Care Summit: Improve Your Bottom Line and Your Professional Life.
In this episode, Nicole shares how she started her professional life as an accountant due to her people pleasing tendencies and wanting to make her parents proud. She later discovered she had a gift for listening and people often felt comfortable opening up to her so she went back to school to become a therapist and coach. We discuss the root of perfectionism and people pleasing tendencies and how to get curious enough to understand and unlearn those traits. Tune in for an insightful look with Nicole!
//
Resources:
- Visit Nicole's website to take a quiz: '10 Signs You Might Be a Perfectionist'
- Website: nicoleburgesscoaching.com
- Podcast: Soulfilled Sisterhood Podcast
- Books:
- The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown
- Radical Acceptance by Tara Brach
- Self Compassion by Kristin Neff
- Song: Cowgirl Creed by Templeton Thompson
- In the Wake episode:
- Quieting the People Pleaser in You
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Facebook: Whytli Rogers
Twitter: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
In this special episode, I chat with someone that I mention in every other podcast episode - my very own therapist of three years. We reflect on my journey with her and how much I have grown and evolved through working with her. The foundation of our entire therapy relationship has been resilience. She touches on her own background, experiences, and struggles growing up which she believes to have helped her be a more empathetic, understanding, and overall better therapist. We discuss the stigmas vs. realities of therapy, therapists, and mental illness. Tune in to hear more from my therapist, Maria!
//
Resources:
Find a therapist:
Psychology Today
Better Help - Online therapy
Good Therapy
Therapy Tribe
End The Stigma Foundation:
Website: endthestigma.org
Instagram: @endthestigmaorg
Facebook: End The Stigma Foundation
YouTube: End The Stigma
Contact us here.
//
Song:
Dare to Move by Switchfoot
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Twitter: @whytli
Facebook: Whytli Rogers
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
In this week's episode, I recount my first REAL date in January of 2019, after leaving my abusive relationship. I share the healing it took to get to that place and compare how I used to show up compared to the shift on this date. I speak about the lessons I learned about myself, dating, relationships, males, and loving myself.
//
Song:
That's Not Love by Cristabelle Braden
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Facebook: Whytli Rogers
Twitter: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
In this week's episode, I chat with my younger sister, mini me, and best friend. I wanted to change it up and share a lighter, more fun episode amidst the heaviness of my series. By listening, you'll get the inside scoop on what our family dynamic looks like, being a middle child, and what it's like being a teenager in middle school in this day and age. Mae shares her insights and beliefs on life and is a wise, witty, and honest voice.
//
Song:
Introducing Me by Nick Jonas
//
Instagram: @malloryisabelle
TikTok: @malloryisabelle
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Facebook: Whytli Rogers
Twitter: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
After re-reading old journals from when I was thick in a depression and had suicidal ideation, I wrote a message to my younger self and all the things I might have needed to so desperately hear. I also took excerpts from letters I had written to myself. This short episode is a message of hope to those struggling and in need of some validation and encouragement that their life is worth living amidst the pain. If someone you know is struggling right now, send this message their way!
//
If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide or having suicidal thoughts:
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
Call 1-800-273-8255
//
Dear Whytli Video
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Facebook: Whytli Rogers
Twitter: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
In this week's episode I dive deep into the trauma, fear, anxiety, and grief that may be coming up due to this worldwide pandemic and how to process and cope with them in a healthy manner. I then speak about the healing, growth, and positivity that may come from this. I include some ideas on how to show up to your quarantine and things that may be helpful during this time.
//
Resources:
Podcast Episodes Mentioned:
- Unlocking Us by Brene Brown: Comparative Suffering
- Therapy Thoughts with Tiffany Roe: Fear, Panic, Anxiety, & Disease
- Therapy Thoughts with Tiffany Roe: FEEL, DEAL, HEAL
- ON Purpose with Jay Shetty: 3 Ways to Deal with Loneliness & Healthy Social Distancing
- ON Purpose with Jay Shetty: 11 Indoor Activities to Reduce Stress, Beat Boredom, & Boost Positivity
- In the Wake with Whytli: Navigating Control
- In the Wake with Whytli: Grieving People, Changes, & Eras
Podcast Not Mentioned but Recommended for Listening:
- Woke with Weslie: Quarantine life, & how to process your anxiety over coronavirus with Doug Cartwright
- Love Your Truth: Finding Peace by Embracing Uncertainty
- Live Free Creative: Creating Calm in Chaos
Instagram:
- @therapyforwomen
- @thefuckitdiet
- @tonitalkstherapy
- @stephaniedawnelizabeth
- @nedratawwab
- @brenebrown
- @heytiffanyroe
- @glennondoyle
- @tobemagnetic
- @stephaniechinnart
YouTube:
- Some Good News with John Krasinski
- Yoga with Adriene
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Facebook: Whytli Rogers
Twitter: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
In this episode, I dissect the lessons I am learning right now in life and my process to move out of the cycles I'm stuck in created by repeated acts of self-betrayal and giving up on yourself. I talk about how this lack of commitment to yourself and your goals affects your deeper subconscious, making it easier to give up, and how you can retrain your mind and subconscious to think and show up differently. I break it down into small, attainable steps and actions you can start implementing to set your future self up for success instead of repeating those self-sabotaging behaviors, thoughts, and cycles.
//
Resources:
Books:
- Anatomy of Peace by Arbinger Institute
- Girl Wash Your Face by Rachel Hollis
Podcasts:
- Girl Wash Your Face: Chapter 2 Reading
Websites:
- Simply Sadie Jane
Songs:
- Got It In You by Banners
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Facebook: Whytli Rogers
Twitter: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
In this episode, I interview the creative artist and photographer, Ashley Thalman, on what it means to be seen to her and by her. She dives into her creative processes and thinking on unleashing the vulnerability with her client(s) to truly see their soul through her work. She shares her wisdom for other artists and creatives in the future. There are multiple means in which you can work with Ashley Thalman from social media to sessions to retreats. See below for more info:
//
Resources:
Instagram:
- @ashleythalmanphoto
- @seenwomxn
- @thatsultraviolet
Newsletter:
- Seen Womxn Subscribe
Retreat:
- Escalante Seen Weekend
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Twitter: @whytli
Facebook: Whytli Rogers
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
I'M BACK!! I took a two month break for the sake of my mental health but I'm back talking about my experiences and time living abroad in Thailand. I catch up on what life has looked like for me over the six months - four living in Thailand and two readjusting to life back home now. I speak about the behind the scenes of the Instagram-painted version of Thailand and tell honestly some of the things I really struggled with while living across the world. I also acknowledge and recount the beautiful moments and things that I learned and took away from that experience. Then, I recall what it has looked like these past two months in readjusting and figuring out how to move forward with life post-Thailand.
//
Also, HAPPY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY TO IN THE WAKE!!! We have officially reached a full year of speaking truth into the world through the means of this podcast. I want to thank every single one of you that has been here and continues to show up, listen, and be a part of this community. Show us some love by leaving a rating and review!! I would really appreciate it and I'd also love to hear what you have to say individually...so reach out! Contact, DM, or text me - it makes my whole world hearing from you guys!!
Resources:
My blog
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey:
Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
In this episode, Kaitlynn breaks down what it means to be a woman in the world to her. She breaks down the myths and misunderstandings the world has regarding feminists and defines our purpose and power in advocating for women's rights. Kaitlynn is also a podcast host over at her platform, Choosing Happiness, where we switched roles and she interviewed me. If you like this episode, go check her out and subscribe to her channel!
//
Resources:
- On the Basis of Sex Movie
Instagram:
- @kaitlynn.olivas
- @choosinghappiness.podcast
Podcast:
- Choosing Happiness
- Episode 23: Whytli - Finding Peace in the Journey
Songs:
- Try by Colbie Caillat
- The Man by Taylor Swift
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
In this episode, I talk with one of my very good friends about her journey navigating the modesty lessons taught in her religion, body shaming throughout society, and the Puritan culture affecting her mindset on sex, her body, and modesty.
//
Resources:
Websites:
- beautyredefined.org
- tiffanyroe.com
Courses:
- Body Image Course
- Intro to Intuitive Eating Course
- Perfectionism + Self Love Course
Podcast Episodes:
- Modesty by Q More
- Body Image by Tiffany Roe
- Postpartum Body Image by Tiffany Roe
Instagram:
- @beauty_redefined
- @angelina_hill07
- @heytiffanyroe
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
TRIGGER WARNING
This is a heavier episode and graphic details of suicide are shared. If you are suffering or recovering from a mood or mental disorder and/or suicide ideation, please listen with caution or choose to not listen at all. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things discussed in this episode to set you back in your healing journey or to trigger negative thoughts and feelings. Also, if you are a bit more sensitive or an empath, you also may want to listen with caution. This episode also contains explicit language.
Disclaimer
Whytli here. I would like to make an update edit stating that, in the time since this episode was posted, I have discovered that many of my personal values may not align well with those of the episode's guest(s). This is based on stances they have taken and/or shared on social media, etc. Although I may not 100% agree anymore with everything that was said, I don't feel the need to take down this episode because it may still have valuable content or messages that some may need to hear. If you are listening to this older episode, you may keep that in mind.
//
Anna and Sarah speak about the loss of their brother to suicide and the trauma they experienced afterwards. Through the vulnerability and rawness of their story, they empower and educate others on this sensitive topic. We discuss the grieving and healing process, advocating for mental health, and options to help those struggling. Anna and Sarah hosted a Run for Mental Health event to raise awareness about the affects of suicide and mental illness education. The host, Whytli Rogers, attended the event with her foundation, End The Stigma, hosting a booth and speaker where she was able to connect with the sisters. She was deeply impacted by their story and wanted to bring their voices to her platform. Listen in to hear more and share with your friends to spread the word!!
//
Resources:
Instagram:
- @endthestigmaorg
Website:
- endthestigma.org
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Ever since he was young, Phil has been passionate about advocating for survivors and victims of sexual assault and abuse. As a survivor himself, he vows to teach others what consent looks and feels like. He travels around teaching and speaking about consent and negotiation in relationships. Phil seeks to make a difference in this world through educating others, marching in protests, and calling out his own privilege. Listen into this week's episode to hear his empowering and inspiring voice.
//
Resources:
- Hello, Privilege. It's Me, Chelsea
- National Domestic Violence Hotline
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Contact Phil
- Phone number: 702.612.6127
- Email: phil@speakinggold.com
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey here.
- Instagram: @whytli
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
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Trigger Warning
This is a heavier episode as we speak of sexual assault, rape, and abuse. If you are suffering or recovering from a mood or mental disorder and/or a victim of sexual assault or abuse, please listen with caution or don't listen at all. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or to trigger negative thoughts or emotions. Also, if you are a bit more sensitive or an empath, you also may want to listen with caution. This episode also contains explicit language.
//
Laura speaks about her childhood sexual assault all the way up to her college encounters of sexual assault and beyond. As she tells her story, she relays triggers and what her life looked like after being raped. Being a passionate feminist and advocate, she debunks rape myths and educates on how rape culture shows up in the world today. Listen in to hear her empowering voice tell her story and more.
//
Resources:
- RAINN -- Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network
- Statistics stated in podcast
- RAINN Sexual Assault Hotline - 800.656.HOPE (4673)
- National Domestic Violence Hotline - 1-800-799-7233
//
Song: Til It Happens to You by Lady Gaga
//
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Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
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* Trigger Warning *
This is a heavier episode. We continue to talk about the difficult aftermath of my abuse and my decision to speak about it publicly. If you are suffering or recovering from a mood or mental disorder, and/or sexual assault, abuse, or trauma, please listen with caution or don't listen at all. The last thing I would want is for hearing these stories to set you back in your healing journey or to trigger bad memories or thoughts. Also, if you are a bit more sensitive or an empath, you also may want to listen with caution.
//
In Part 2 of my conversation with my dad, we talk about:
- How sharing my story affected my family
- How going through all of this has affected my siblings and my parents' parenting decisions
- Talking about difficult subjects with your children, including consent
- Some comments about forgiveness when it comes to an abusive situation
- My dad's experiences in therapy, including things he's learned and is working on
//
Song: Otherwise by Jake Scott
//
Connect with Brett Rogers here.
//
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Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
* Trigger Warning *
This is a heavier episode. We talk about my suicide attempts and sexual abuse in explicit detail. If you are suffering or recovering from a mood or mental disorder, and/or sexual assault, abuse, or trauma, please listen with caution or don't listen at all. The last thing I would want is for hearing these stories to set you back in your healing journey or to trigger bad memories or thoughts. Also, if you are a bit more sensitive or an empath, you also may want to listen with caution.
//
I've shared my story openly and publicly about being sexually abused and suffering with anxiety and depression. My parents and siblings are secondary survivors to my abuse since they lived and witnessed the hell along side me. My support system has been a crucial part of healing from these traumas. In this episode, part 1 of 2, I have a conversation with my very own father, Brett Rogers, on what it was like parenting and supporting me through these traumatic moments in time.
We talk about things like:
- My parents' experience finding out about my sexual abuse
- The effect my extreme anxiety and depression had on my family
- The process of finding the right kind of mental health care
- Navigating extreme and suicidal behavior from a parent/caregiver standpoint
- Recognizing abusive behavior
//
Connect with Brett Rogers here.
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
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Disclaimer
Whytli here - I would like to make an edit saying that I may not align or agree with the entirety of this message any longer. My viewpoints on pornography and addiction have either expanded and/or changed. At the time of this interview, I was authentically speaking from my understanding and personal experience but have since shifted away from that original standpoint. Although I may not 100% agree anymore with everything that was said, I didn't feel the need to take down this episode because regardless, it may still have valuable content or messages that some may need to hear. If you are listening to this older episode, you may keep that in mind.
//
Caitlin Taylor started an Instagram platform called @NotMySinToShare as a way to reach other wives struggling with their husbands' pornography addictions. Caitlin's husband, Adrian, then started a second Instagram platform called @ItIsMySinToShare where he was open and honest about his own addiction. Both are a power couple as they fight and heal from addiction. In this interview, Caitlin speaks vulnerably about her experiences coping and healing after learning of her husband's addiction and facing their marital issues. Caitlin has so many words of hope and light that may hit deep for those currently in her position. If you or someone you love, suffers from a porn addiction, this episode may be of high interest to you.
//
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Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
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In this interview, Dillon tells of his experiences serving refugees in Germany. He was on a service mission trip for two weeks. In that time, he learned the difference between selfish and selfless service and then he tells stories about how he applied it to his personal life. He recounts the lessons he learned from the people he was serving and serving with and the ways that he was changed as a person. Listen in to hear more from Dillon Stewart himself!!
//
Resources
Mission trip: HOPE Youth Corps
Instagram: @dill.on
Blog: dillthechill.wordpress.com
//
Song:
Upside Down by Jack Johnson
//
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Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
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In this intimate and vulnerable interview, Joseph and Carolyn don't hold anything back. They speak of their experiences and emotions from childhood up until current day. Through telling their stories, there are many relatable aspects and lessons to take away. If you listen with an open mind, hopefully you'll leave with more compassion, empathy, and understanding.
Joseph speaks about his pressured childhood, pornography addiction, run in with prostitution, divorce, leaving the religion he was raised in, and healing through therapy.
Carolyn speaks about not fitting in as a child, single momhood, being harassed and bullied, blending families, leaving the religion she was raised in, and healing through therapy.
Through all of these many transitions in life, Joseph and Carolyn have come out on top as stronger, more open minded & understanding people. Tune in to hear and learn from their experiences!
//
Resources:
Navigating an LDS Faith-Based Transition Course by Tiffany Roe
CES Letter by Jeremy T. Runnels
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
*Trigger Warning***
This is a heavier episode and I talk about my suicide attempts and suicidal ideation. I speak of the heaviness of the depression I’ve faced and includes great detail at some points. So if you are suffering or recovering from a mood or mental disorder, please listen with caution or don’t listen at all. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or to trigger bad memories or thoughts. Also, if you are a bit more sensitive or an empath, you also may want to listen with caution.
//
In this episode, I recount my intense depressive episode and what it looked and felt like on the daily. I speak about my suicide attempts and suicide ideation. I also talk about the stigmas and misunderstandings regarding depression as well as what I've taken away and learned from my depression. It has stretched and transformed me. It has grown my capacity to feel emotions and sheer happiness and gratitude.
//
Other podcast episodes:
Episode 3 -- Being a Helpful Support to Your Loved Ones
Episode 7 -- Mental Health: Thoughts, Feelings, and Behaviors
Episode 10 -- Talking All Things Therapy & Stigmas
Episode 26 -- My Anxiety & Panic Attacks
My #NoFilter Story
//
Song: Breathe Me by Sia
//
Follow along with the rest of my story.
Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
In this episode, I dive deep into my experience battling anxiety and panic attacks. I speak of my triggers, stories, coping mechanisms, and experience with medication and therapy. I went from having multiple panic attacks every single day to not having a panic attack for months at a time. Listen in to hear more of how I made that transformation and what it looks like day to day living with severe anxiety.
//
Podcast Episodes:
If you liked this episode, listen to previous episodes mentioned in this recording:
- Episode 3 - Being a Helpful Support to Your Loved Ones
- Episode 5 - Navigating Control
- Episode 7 - Mental Health: Thoughts, Feelings, and Behaviors
- Episode 10 - Talking All Things Therapy and Stigmas
Resources:
- Resilience Book by Linda Graham
- Calm App -- Meditations & breathing
- Breathe App
- Anxiety Release App -- based on EMDR
- Weighted blanket
- EndTheStigma.org
- Instagram: @endthestigmaorg
- My #NoFilter Video
//
Song:
Stronger by Kelly Clarkson
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
In this quick episode, I talk about what it means to be aligned with your core beliefs and values and living an authentic life. I speak of how your delivery can look different while your inner self is consistent. I give examples and scenarios to show the differences between living in alignment versus living inauthentically. I address the term "fake" that gets thrown around and what that means. Authenticity is imperfection, vulnerability, and consistency. This takes inner work listening to your inner, core voice/self.
//
Resources:
- From Technology Addiction to Minimalism
- Navigating Control
- Brene Brown
//
Song: Will I Be by Sebastian Molina
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram: @whytli
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
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In this episode, I briefly answer the following questions:
- How do you show kindness and charity to others without letting them take advantage of you?
- How do you feel confident and enjoy your summer when you don’t look like the perfect skinny, blonde, tan bikini body?
- After making mistakes in life, how do you recover and come back stronger?
- What are some ways to cope with anxiety?
- How do you get through the times where you just feel so low that you think there is no coming back? How do I recover from not feeling good enough?
//
Song:
Makin' A Move by Lady Bri
//
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Instagram: @whytli
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We experience these deaths that aren’t physical. These endings. These losses and changes that leave us in just as much pain, mourning, and heartache as the physical death of something. In this episode, I process and speak to my experiences right now as I grieve the end and change of so many aspects of my life. I talk about the numbing (denial & isolation), the feeling of emotions (depression, anger, and bargaining), and the rising (acceptance). I am currently in this valley of transition and I am learning to sit in a bathtub full of my grief in order to feel it and move through the valley with grace. Listen in for further insight on my grief and the grieving process.
//
Song:
You're Gonna Be Ok by Brian & Jess Johnson
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram: @whytli
- Grieving Instagram Post
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
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In this week's episode, I passionately speak about our misuse of technology that has turned into addiction. I explain the negative affects our phones and social media have on our lives, relationships, and overall happiness. Then, I give different tips as to how you can make shifts in your habits to improve the way you use your technology in a minimalist fashion. I speak of personal experiences about how technology has affected me and how using it minimally has changed my life for the better. Down below, I have some incredible resources and Ted Talks about phone usage that will change the way you think about your relationship with your technology.
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Resources
- Apple Screen Time Setting How To
- Book: Digital Minimalism
Collin Kartchner
- Instagram: @collinkartchner
- Website: SaveTheKids.us
- Ted Talk: Can flip phones end our social media addiction?
Ted Talks
- Why our screens make us less happy
- How smartphones change the way you think
- Addiction to technology is ruining lives
- Why we should rethink our relationship with the smartphone
Song: Perfect by Madilyn Paige
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- Website: whytli.com
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Alex is a growing influencer that shares a love for fashion, photography, dance, and art. He expresses himself through these creative outlets and shares them with the world. In this intimate interview, we dive into his coming out story, what it was like growing up in a white Christian community as a gay black kid, and his experiences at Pride. As you listen, you get a glimpse into the behind the scenes humanness of the influencer life. Alex makes you feel supported, accepted for who you are, and less alone in this life. Hear what he has to say and leave a rating and review!!
//
Connect with Alex:
- Instagram: @alexgowon
- Youtube: Alex Gowon
- Alex's Presets
- Alex's Merch
//
Song: Here Comes The Change by Kesha
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram: @whytli
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
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Disclaimer
Whytli here. I would like to make an update edit stating that, in the time since this episode was posted, I have discovered that many of my personal values may not align well with those of the episode's guest(s). This is based on stances they have taken and/or shared on social media, etc. Although I may not 100% agree anymore with everything that was said, I don't feel the need to take down this episode because it may still have valuable content or messages that some may need to hear. If you are listening to this older episode, you may keep that in mind.
//
In this week's episode, I interview an old friend, Annie Romano, as she tells her experiences battling obsessive compulsive disorder and social anxiety. She has graduated with her bachelor's of science in psychology so that she can turn around her struggle to help others. She shared her #NoFilter story about mental illness through my foundation, End The Stigma, so be sure to check it out. Annie is lovable, genuine, and intelligent. Listen in for her thoughts on mental health stigmas, her experiences both good and bad in therapy, and how reaching out for connection has helped heal her.
//
Resources:
- Annie's #NoFilter Video
Websites:
- Nami.org
- Nimh.gov
- MentalHealthAmerica.net
- PsychologyToday.com {Find a Therapist}
- EndTheStigma.org
Books:
- OCD Workbook
Instagram:
- @endthestigmaorg
//
Song: Ooh Child by MILCK
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Website: whytli.com
- Instagram: @whytli.com
- Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
Disclaimer
Whytli here. I would like to make an update edit stating that, in the time since this episode was posted, I have discovered that many of my personal values may not align well with those of the episode's guest(s). This is based on stances they have taken and/or shared on social media, etc. Although I may not 100% agree anymore with everything that was said, I don't feel the need to take down this episode because it may still have valuable content or messages that some may need to hear. If you are listening to this older episode, you may keep that in mind.
//
After Megan shared her #NoFilter story about an eating disorder, I knew I had to have her on the podcast to allow her a space to talk further about her experience and things she's learned.
Last week, Megan and I discussed eating disorders, diet culture, and intuitive eating. In this second interview, we speak more to body image, beauty, and learning to love yourself. If you haven't already, listen to last week's episode and watch Megan's #NoFilter story.
//
Resources:
- Megan's #NoFilter Video
Websites:
- IntuitiveEating.org
- EndTheStigma.org
- TiffanyRoe.com
- BeautyRedefined.org
Books:
- Intuitive Eating by Evelyn Tribole & Elyse Resch
- Intuitive Eating Workbook by Evelyn Tribole & Elyse Resch
- Don't Be Pretty article by Glennon Doyle Melton
Instagram:
- @endthestigmaorg
- @heytiffanyroe
- @glennondoyle
- @jameelajamilofficial
- @i_weigh
- @beauty_redefined
//
Song: Hold On by Wilson Phillips
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Website: whytli.com
- Instagram: @whytli
- Contact me here.
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Disclaimer
Whytli here. I would like to make an update edit stating that, in the time since this episode was posted, I have discovered that many of my personal values may not align well with those of the episode's guest(s). This is based on stances they have taken and/or shared on social media, etc. Although I may not 100% agree anymore with everything that was said, I don't feel the need to take down this episode because it may still have valuable content or messages that some may need to hear. If you are listening to this older episode, you may keep that in mind.
//
After Megan shared her #NoFilter story about an eating disorder, I knew I had to have her on the podcast to allow her a space to talk further about her experience and things she's learned.
In this intimate interview, Megan and I delve deeper into what her eating disorder looked like, the difference between disordered eating and eating disorders, what diet culture is and its harmful effects, and the wonders of intuitive eating. This episode covers everything under the sun but it is full of vulnerable and heartfelt content.
//
Resources:
- Megan's #NoFilter Video
Websites:
- IntuitiveEating.org
- EndTheStigma.org
- TiffanyRoe.com
Books:
- Intuitive Eating by Evelyn Tribole & Elyse Resch
- Intuitive Eating Workbook by Evelyn Tribole & Elyse Resch
Instagram:
- @endthestigmaorg
- @heytiffanyroe
//
Song: Fight On, Fighter by for King & Country
//
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- Website: whytli.com
- Instagram: @whytli
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There's a false sense of security in planning out your future detail by detail, years in advance. The thing is, we don't plan for the bumps in the road, the trials, the obstacles, and the plot twists. When your life changes in the blink of an eye, your sense of security in planning out your life is wiped out from under you. That's why I live by the statement: 'Next right thing, one thing at a time.'
In this episode, I talk about surrendering my control and letting go of my white knuckled grip on life which in return brings me more peace and trust. Through all of the insecurity of life's events, I talk about how I have learned resilience and a security in self when everything and everyone else is unreliable and not certain. I can always rely on myself in hardships knowing that I am strong and I am capable of doing hard things.
Before I dive in, I speak about my experiences this past weekend speaking at an event with my foundation, End The Stigma.
Tune in and let me know what you think through a rating or review!
//
Resources:
- Episode 5: Navigating Control
- Born To Shine by Ashley LeMieux
- End The Stigma
- Stephanie Dawn Elizabeth
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Song: Free Life by Dan Wilson
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- Instagram: @whytli
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In this week's episode, I talk about the different experiences I had going to the same Lights Festival two years in a row. Through my collection of stories, I learned an assortment of life lessons. The feeling and experience of 5,000 lights being released into the dark sky is indescribable but I do my best to sum it up in a poetic and metaphorical way. I speak to the burdens that were lifted, the love and connection that flourished, and the light that ignited within all of us in that moment. I also talk about the importance of slowing down and embracing the NOW, what it's like to be an empath, and feeling both positive and negative feelings all at once.
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Experience a Lights Festival here!
My first experience: video, pictures, and Instagram captions
My second experience: video, pictures, and Instagram captions
//
I forgot to shout out the song that wrapped up the episode but here's the song I was thinking of. Give it a listen and listen to the lyrics!
Song: Shine by LOLO
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- Instagram: @whytli
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In this interview with Spencer Rogers, scientist, silversmith, and artist, we talk passionately about what toxic masculinity looks like, how it affects the men and boys in society, and dismantling those beliefs or characteristics. Spencer speaks from his own experience of not fitting the status quo of manliness and how that has affected his self esteem and identity. He also suffers with mental health challenges and discusses the stigmas and shame around men having feelings. He answers questions regarding raising boys, starting conversations about this topic, and holding compassion for others unlearning the toxic form of masculinity.
Listen in to this vulnerable, powerful conversation I had with Spencer and share it with your friends!!
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Resources
- Song: Grow As We Go by Ben Platt
- Book: The Heart of a Boy: Celebrating Strength and Spirit of Boyhood by Kate T. Parker
- Video: Boys Will Be...
//
Contact Spencer
- Instagram: @artbyspence
- Website: artbyspence.com
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
- Instagram: @whytli
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
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Through the many hardships, labels, trials, and stereotypes we face in life that make us feel lonely, you'll find that you aren't actually alone when you surround yourself with a group of people that are going through the same things. I explain the refreshing and validating experience of sharing the burdens with a support system that feels your same pain. Through vulnerability, you can begin to seek and attract your tribe, your people, your circle of strength. This will make a world of a difference in your healing journey and becoming the best version of yourself. Listen in for a dose of hope in your loneliness!
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Resources mentioned:
- What Made Maddy Run by Kate Fagan
- End the Stigma - teen mental health foundation
- My story of mental illness
- My story of sexual & mental abuse
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Song: Broken by LovelyTheBand
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Follow along with the rest of my journey:
- Instagram: @whytli
- Website: whytli.com
- Contact me here.
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In this BONUS episode, I provide a guided meditation complete with a body scan and personal pep talk. To preface this episode, listen to my prior episode that dives into what meditation looks like. Take 12 minutes out of your day to put some calm in your every day chaos of life by tuning in to this guided meditation.
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Guided Meditation Apps:
Calm - My personal favorite app full of specific meditation series - special breathing methods, meditation for kids, and sleep meditation series.
Stop, Breathe, & Think - This app does a personal check-in where you document the well-being of your physical state, mental state, emotions you're feeling, and then it gives you recommended meditation series according to your results.
Sanity & Self - This app is more specifically for women and girls with series on relationships, self love, beauty, etc.
Anxiety Release - This app is based off of EMDR therapy to help retrain your anxious brain.
Think Up - This app isn't so much meditation but more affirmations. You can record you saying a personalized affirmation and play it on repeat.
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
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If you brave this episode, you'll start to find out that meditation actually isn't all that scary. Life is so fast-paced, everything is instant at our fingertips, and we rush so quickly from to-do list to to-do list that we almost forget to breathe. Meditating - even for just 5 minutes a day - can re-center your inner peace and help carry you through this ever spinning world with grace and a calm nature. The thing is, there is no right or wrong way to meditate, so really, everyone has the capability to meditate.
I go through my personal predetermined beliefs or myths about meditation along with my experience meditating. I especially emphasize the myth that meditation is having zero thoughts. I then walk through the varieties of meditation and creating a meditation practice specific to your needs and likes. I talk a lot about your breath and breathing patterns that allow you to slow down and refocus your mind.
Following this episode, I have a BONUS episode - a guided meditation!! Keep listening for a 12 minute guided meditation that will put the calm in your chaos.
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Guided Meditation Apps:
Calm - My personal favorite app full of specific meditation series - special breathing methods, meditation for kids, and sleep meditation series.
Stop, Breathe, & Think - This app does a personal check-in where you document the well-being of your physical state, mental state, emotions you're feeling, and then it gives you recommended meditation series according to your results.
Sanity & Self - This app is more specifically for women and girls with series on relationships, self love, beauty, etc.
Anxiety Release - This app is based off of EMDR therapy to help retrain your anxious brain.
Think Up - This app isn't so much meditation but more affirmations. You can record you saying a personalized affirmation and play it on repeat.
//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
Support the show (https://paypal.me/whytli?locale.x=en_US)
In honor of April being Sexual Assault Awareness month, I'm talking about consent. But not just consent - teaching your kids the concept of consent from the time they can talk until they grow up and move out of the house. The societal norm has been to give the sex talk once at age 10 or 12 and then be done with it, but that is no longer enough. These conversations need to happen constantly, always, and forever. Consent isn't just about sex. It's about hugs, kisses, sharing, cuddling, tickling, secrets. Kids need to understand consent in order to create personal boundaries and not only respect their own bodies but also others' bodies and space. To prevent your kids from either becoming a victim of sexual assault or a predator perpetrating sexual assault, the best thing you can do for them is educate them, give them a voice of consent, and an understanding of respect.
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Resources:
- Tea Consent Video
- Grey's Anatomy Scene
Articles to help parents with conversations about consent:
- teachconsent.org
- talkwithyourkids.org
- childmind.org
Children's book about consent:
- Let's Talk About Body Boundaries, Consent, and Respect
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Song: Barbies by P!nk
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Follow along with the rest of my journey.
Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
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I am talking all things therapy - my personal experience with therapy, the common stigmas attached to therapy, and the realities and benefits of therapy. March 30th, 2019, was my two year anniversary in therapy. Since that day, I have tried CBT therapy, EMDR therapy, family therapy, couples therapy, hypnotherapy, and many therapy support groups. I also helped start a support group through my foundation, End the Stigma, with my therapist running the group. The group grew so popular that there are now three support groups for teens here in Henderson, Nevada.
My point is I. LOVE. THERAPY. But the rest of the world shames and stigmatizes therapy. I'm here to break down those stigmas and fight for the strength it takes to reach out for help.
Some of the stigmas or myths about therapy that I go over:
- You are weak for going to therapy. You weren't strong enough to do it on your own. Or you must not have a good support system or great home life.
- It isn't "bad enough" to go to therapy.
- I tried therapy and didn't like my therapist so I guess therapy doesn't work for me.
- I'm uncomfortable talking to a stranger about my personal life.
- I don't need therapy because I have God and prayer to fix my problems.
- Going through the motions of simply showing up to therapy is good enough to make progress in my life.
All of these are false, exaggerated, and damaging beliefs that hold people back from going to therapy. Listen in to hear what I have to say regarding each one and what the reality looks like!
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Here are the resources from Tiffany Roe - therapist, influencer, speaker, and owner of a mental health facility. She runs the campaign that Therapy IS Cool.
Instagram: @heytiffanyroe
@mindfulcounseling
Website: tiffanyroe.com
Podcast: Therapy Thoughts
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Here are the flyers for my teen therapy support groups here in Henderson, Nevada.
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Song: Clearly by Grace VanderWaal
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Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
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In this episode I share my journey of being a people pleaser for eighteen years and what it looks like to turn that around to own your power. I go deep into the fears, underlying beliefs, and reasons why we feel the need to please everyone around us. I then list the tools and new habits you can create to quiet the inner people pleaser in you, such as boundaries, saying 'no,' understanding your fears, owning your time, and coming to peace with the fact that not everybody is going to like you. I believe that all of us have a hint of people pleasing in us because the need for approval and acceptance are basic human essentials. The difference is your intentions and where you are seeking this approval from. Instead of constantly seeking outward for these things where you'll receive crumbs, look inward to nourish and flourish that need.
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Song: What If I by Jessi Smiles
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Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
Contact me here.
My Story:
Part 1
Part 2
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In this golden episode, I interview Brynlie Ellefsen, a girl using her voice and platform to spread girl empowerment. We talk about the comparison and competition girls face, how social media affects this, and what it looks like to be a girl in today's world. She talks about giveaways she has done in the past encouraging girls to share their appreciation and love for the other girls in their lives. Brynlie hypes up every girl she comes across and shares how you can start doing the same thing. Listen in to feel more empowered and lightened up!
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Brynlie recently shared her #NoFilter story about mental illness through the End the Stigma. Watch it here.
Follow, contact, and get to know Brynlie here:
Instagram: @brynlie.ellefsen
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Song: Baby, You're Beautiful by Lady Bri
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Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
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In this episode, I cover mental health - something I am deeply passionate about. Regardless of a mental illness diagnosis, we all have mental health. Everyone needs to maintain and strengthen their mental state of mind. I identify what poor mental health looks like, such as perfectionism, high stress, pessimism, and self esteem issues. I break down mental health into your:
- Thoughts
- Feelings
- Behaviors
Listen in to hear how to take care of each section of your mental health.
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The meditation app I mention is called Calm.
Some of my favorite mental health experts are:
- Tiffany Roe: therapist, psychology teacher, & speaker. She has several mental health courses on her website.
- Dr. Brene Brown: researcher, writer, speaker, & goddess of all things mental health. Read her books or take her courses and you won't regret it.
- Amanda E. White: therapist, coach, influencer. She specifies in therapy for women and has weekly newsletters, a therapy clinic, and online counseling or coaching.
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Song: Alright by Walk Off The Earth
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Instagram: @whytli
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In this episode, I explain the reasons we get stuck in a mindset of complaining rather than doing. I expand upon what it looks like to take action rather than simply react to what's happening around you. I share what it looked like when I was stuck in a pity party of complaining to the comparison of what my life looks like now as I have taken action to create the life I love. Take a listen to hear some mindset growth tips on shifting from complainer to doer.
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Song: A Million Dreams by P!nk
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No matter who you are, we all struggle with self worth and self love at one point or another. When you learn to genuinely love yourself as you are, in turn you learn to love others and your life more fully. I tell the story of my personal journey to learning to love myself.
I committed to an 18 day challenge to do just that. Here's that challenge along with a few others:
18 Day Love Yourself Challenge
30 Day Love Yourself Book
7 Day Love Yourself Challenge
I also travel around the West Coast teaching a Love Yourself Lesson. I have taught this to church groups, youth groups, school classes, friends, teenagers, both boys and girls. If you'd like to contact me to potentially come teach at your event or group, contact me here.
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Song: Don't Be So Hard On Yourself by Jess Glynne
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Disclaimer
Whytli here. I would like to make an update edit stating that, in the time since this episode was posted, I have discovered that many of my personal values may not align well with those of the episode's guest(s). This is based on stances they have taken and/or shared on social media, etc. Although I may not 100% agree anymore with everything that was said, I don't feel the need to take down this episode because it may still have valuable content or messages that some may need to hear. If you are listening to this older episode, you may keep that in mind.
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On this episode, I speak with my best friend, Megan Van Alfen, about the unspoken rules of society that we find ourselves following and we are here to question them. Who made up these rules? If no one speaks of them, how do we all know them? Why do we unconsciously follow them? Listen in to find the answers. We challenge you to break these rules. Speak a different language then society. Embrace your individuality rather than following the crowd. Here are only five rules we talk about:
- The Instagram rules--followings, double posting, perfect pictures & captions, obligated posts for events, etc.
- The automatic response of "I'm good" to the everyday question "How are you?"
- The unacceptable cancelling of plans for change in mental health, priorities, or circumstances
- Saying 'yes' to dates
- Being in a relationship equates to happiness
Better understand what these rules mean and look like by listening into this fun and light hearted conversation I had with Megan.
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Song: Misfit by High Dive Heart
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This is an extra vulnerable episode as I talk about my struggle of control while I'm in the thick of it. I have found myself almost addicted to feeling in control and it has negatively affected multiple aspects of my life including my anxiety. I'm learning to navigate what I can and cannot control in my life. I tell multiple stories and insights as I make the shift and progress towards a happier, lighter life free from the urges to control everything. The three things I talk about are:
- Circle of control
- Fear is the root of control
- Learning to let go
Tune in for a heartfelt conversation on what it looks like to be overwhelmed by control.
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Song: One Day at a Time by Madilyn Paige
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I discuss what helpful versus hurtful ways of supporting your loved ones look like. I explain the automatic human responses to a friend struggling that may not be the most helpful approach. I narrow it down to four ways to be a successful support:
- Holding space free of judgement, criticism, or opinions
- Validating them, their feelings, and their experiences
- Showing up constantly
- Genuine empathy
Listen in to dive deeper into these four characteristics of support. I also talk about what it's like needing support and speaking up for those needs as well as being the supporter.
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Song: Anymore by Madilyn Paige
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Welcome to In the Wake with Whytli!
I am a certified life coach and a mental health advocate. I am also a survivor of sexual and mental abuse. I struggle with anxiety, depression, panic disorder, and trauma.
I am choosing to rise up from the hurt and the pain. I am turning my story into one of hope and light. I choose empowerment, growth, and empathy. As I continue to heal from my trauma, I am making my voice heard through this podcast platform. I have become so passionate as an advocate for mental illness and abuse. I am here to share my personal journey and insights with my corner of the world.
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Song: Rise Up by Andra Day
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Instagram: @whytli
Website: whytli.com
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