Remembering A Life: Recent Episodes
Remembering A Life
What happens to unclaimed cremated remains, and who ensures those lives are never forgotten? In this powerful episode of Remembering A Life, host Gail Marquardt speaks with Lanae Strovers, licensed funeral director and founder of The Final Salute, a nonprofit dedicated to honoring unclaimed individuals with dignity and care.
Across the country, funeral homes quietly care for unclaimed cremated remains - people of all ages and backgrounds whose stories risk being lost. Lanae felt called to act, creating a way to honor the hundreds of individuals in her funeral home's care, some unclaimed for decades, and ensuring each life is remembered.
Through deeply moving community ceremonies, Lanae and her team restore identity and humanity to those who might otherwise be forgotten. From a Civil War veteran finally receiving military honors to a Gold Star mother honored by families who share her loss, each story reflects the profound impact of remembrance - and the power of showing up for one another.
End-of-Life Doulas and Funeral Directors: Transforming Deathcare and Meaningful End-of-Life Planning
As more families turn to end-of-life doulas for support during the final stages of life, opportunities for collaboration with funeral directors to better serve families continue to grow. End-of-Life Doula Ashley Johnson and Funeral Director Joél Simone explore how these partnerships can create a seamless, meaningful transition after a death, ensuring continuity of care as a loved one moves from the support of a doula to the care of a funeral professional. Together, they highlight how this collaborative approach helps families navigate loss with greater confidence, dignity and compassion.
A hilarious and heartfelt chat with author John Kenney about I See You've Called In Dead, the only novel where an obituary writer's worst mistake becomes his best chance at living. Kenney shares the real-life humor, heartbreak, and funeral-home field trips that inspired the story.
How do you support someone who is grieving when words feel inadequate? In this episode of the Remembering A Life Podcast, host Gail Marquardt is joined by Camila Crews, founder of Sorry for Your Loss Cards, for an honest conversation about grief support, language, culture, and showing up with presence instead of platitudes.
Camila shares how her personal experiences with loss inspired her to create culturally fluent grief support cards designed for moments long after the funeral—when grief is ongoing and support often fades. Together, Gail and Camila explore why traditional sympathy messages often fall short, how representation matters in grief, and what it truly means to hold space for someone who is grieving.
What happens when you ask the questions that matter most?
In this episode, host Gail Marquardt and guest Skip Weiss use the Have the Talk of a Lifetime Conversation Cards to share meaningful stories about childhood, legacy, loss, joy, and the moments that shape who we are. Their honest, reflective conversation shows how simple questions can spark deeper connection and help preserve life stories with the people we love.
Perfect for anyone seeking more meaningful conversations about life and legacy.
The holidays can be difficult when we're grieving – or supporting someone who is. Alex Mammadyarov, a writer and psychotherapist specializing in grief, joins us for a conversation about the challenges of grieving during the "happiest time of the year" and how we can continue to move forward in our grief during a time when family and friends are gathering to celebrate.
John Hill didn't start his career planning funerals. He began in ministry, dedicating his life to serving his community from a place of faith. When he felt a calling to step away from his role as a pastor, he found himself with a closet full of suits and a question: "Where could I work wearing all these suits?" The answer that came to him was a funeral home. In this episode, John shares his story.
[CW: Traumatic death, suicide and infant loss]
Amanda King, a funeral director and embalmer specializing in restorative art, has given numerous families the gift of viewing their loved one after a traumatic death. In this episode she shares stories about families she has served and how viewing their loved one helped them move forward on their grief journey. Her work is truly inspiring.
The death of a child is perhaps the most unfathomable loss any of us can imagine. Kristin James and Betsy Hawley, through their work with the Grief Network and the Pediatric Palliative Care Coalition, help ensure families have the resources and support they need to both navigate the complexities of the care a terminally ill child receives and honor the life of that child in meaningful ways.
Let's have a conversation about life, death and how we want to be remembered! Jamie Kramer, founder/CEO of Earthly After, is ready to talk about everything from how our prior experiences with death inform what we want when we die to honoring a loved one in creative ways and how nature can help us move forward on our grief journey. Jamie is on a mission to normalize talking about death – join us!
Lanae Strovers just might be one of the most creative funeral directors out there. From transforming a visitation room into a baseball field to honor a Little League coach, to creating a runway featuring clothing designed by a glamorous 1940s model, Lanae's personal touches help family and friends begin their grief journeys in beautifully meaningful ways.
Think you know what a typical funeral director looks like? Get ready for a new generation that challenges your perceptions! In fact, the funeral directors of tomorrow are mostly women, many are people of color - and they’re ready to lead the profession into the future. Leili McMurrough, president of Worsham College of Mortuary Science, and student Sioux Westby join us to dispel the myths!
Katey Houston from Return Home in Auburn, Washington, joins us as we dig into the topic of natural organic reduction, commonly referred to as human composting. This relatively new form of disposition offers a unique option for people who want to return their bodies to the earth after they die and offers meaningful opportunities for family and friends to say goodbye to a loved one.
Nicholas Welzenbach grew up in funeral service but as a young person he pursued his passions of surfing and skateboarding, convinced being a funeral director was not for him. But the profession kept drawing him back in. Now, as managing partner of Darling Fischer Funeral Homes in California, he joins us to talk about his experiences as a funeral director and why funerals are as relevant as ever.
Every year, people who are incarcerated die in prison, often without the compassionate hospice care that would be expected in other environments. Laura Musselman, Fernando Murillo, and the rest of the team from the Humane Prison Hospice Project are working to change that through an innovative program that trains incarcerated individuals to provide end-of-life care to their peers who are dying.
Richard Schoeller has served grieving families and individuals throughout his professional life, initially as a funeral director and now, since the late 1990s, as a certified medium. Learn how he realized he had this special gift and how he shares information that has helped people move forward following a loss.
Freddie Powell, a funeral director in Salford, England, doesn't fit the stereotype of a funeral director. As a participant on the #1 reality show Love Is Blind UK, he challenged the notion that funeral professionals are grim and depressing. Listen for the inside scoop on how the women on the show reacted to Freddie's profession and how the show made him the UK's most eligible funeral director.
Cemeteries are bursting with history and, as we found out on a recent visit to Forest Home Cemetery in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, also a fair amount of drama! Join cemetery docent Cyndi Kramer on a walkabout of this 175-year-old cemetery that is the final resting place of the famous and not so famous, including beer barons, ship builders and flappers.
Benny Capaul doesn’t fit the mold of what most people think of when they think of a funeral director. He feels equally at home in the embalming room or on stage doing vocals with his ska-punk rock band. He’s also a death doula, podcaster and death/grief consultant. In this episode we talk about the societal shifts that have changed how we honor the dead and why ceremony is still important.
What happens when someone is near the end of their life but they don't have family or friends to sit with them in their final days? For Tannis Dorscht, the answer is simple. She will, as a volunteer with the No One Dies Alone program, sit with someone she has never met, sometimes in complete silence, as a source of comfort and companionship as they approach the end of life.
CW: Discussion about the mass shooting at Columbine High School
Chuck Bowman and John Horan were funeral directors at Horan & McConaty Funeral Home on April 20, 1999, when two assailants killed 13 people at Columbine High School in Littleton, Colorado. They, Jennifer McBride, Director of Grief Support and Community Education, and coworkers helped seven families say goodbye to their loved ones.
Tim Purves, Chairman and owner of William Purves Funeral Directors in Edinburgh, managed the Scottish element of Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II’s funeral. From the initial days at Balmoral Castle where The Queen died to the carefully managed boarding of a London-bound aircraft, Tim had the honor of accompanying The Queen on her final journey. This is a fascinating behind-the-scenes conversation.
Darnell Lamont Walker, Emmy-nominated television writer, content creator, filmmaker, healer, and death doula. His credits include writing for children’s programming, including Blue’s Clues & You and Karma’s World; and work as a filmmaker for Seeking Asylum, Outside the House, and Set Yourself on Fire. In this conversation we talk about his work as a death doula and grief in the Black community.
Every day, Brad Wolfe, founder and executive director of Reimagine, helps people face adversity and loss, and channel the hard parts of life into meaningful action. Inspired by his grandparents’ experiences and survival during the Holocaust, Brad shares their story and how it led him to the impactful work he does today.
TW: Episode includes descriptions of experiences in WWII concentration camps.
To grieve is often to feel ungrounded. The ritualistic aspects of yoga, however, can help us adjust to an environment in which our loved one is now absent by providing a safe place of belonging in which to work through the pain of loss. In this episode, yoga teacher Meg Galarza and grief therapist Elizabeth Lewis guide us in starting a yoga practice that will help us move forward in grief.
After a mass-fatality event, families of individuals who have died are looking for many answers. Often, their most pressing question is, "Where is my loved one?" Recovering remains can be difficult and time-consuming; often, disaster teams are deployed to help. Tim Schramm, owner and CEO of Howe-Peterson Funeral Home and commander of the Michigan Mortuary Response Team is sometimes among them.
Katarina Blom is not one to shy away from the topic of death. As co-host of Peacock’s hit show, “The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning,” Katarina is passionate about helping people open up about the objects they have collected over the years, inviting them to consider how sharing or giving away some of those items might help them both clear out the clutter and establish a meaningful legacy.
Susan Reising had the story of Lola and the Tree of Life in her for decades, but it finally came to life during the pandemic when she published this beautiful children's book that helps children prepare for the death of a loved one or pet. Through the lens of a young girl, her dog, and a wise old tree, she helps children understand that while death is permanent, meaning and connections live on.
Put away your hiking boots and canoe paddles and get ready for a new kind of summer camp! After Life Mortuary Services in Memphis offers a camp that packs plenty of fun while teaching campers about cremation, restoration, serving families, and more. Funeral directors Madeline Lyles and Dana Taylor hope the experience opens up a world of possibilities for the young people who participate.
No two people grieve alike, but an autistic adult may experience and react to grief in unique ways that others may not understand. Dr. Kenneth Doka and Lisa Morgan help us better understand how to support an autistic adult who is grieving and how to approach grief as an autistic adult.
Honoring the life of a loved one takes many forms as we strive to find ways to do so in a way that is reflective of their interests, values and legacy. If a loved one enjoyed spending time outdoors, a memorial tree may be the perfect tribute. Max Anderson from the Arbor Day Foundation joins us to discuss this meaningful idea for a living memorial.
Funeral directors, of course, help families after a loved one has died and guide them in planning a meaningful service so family and friends can gather to say goodbye and begin to mourn. But there’s much more to the profession than meets the eye. Funeral professionals LaShonda Martin and Timothy McLoone join us for an eye-opening discussion about the life of a funeral professional.
When Brian Rea first began jotting down notes and drawings about the things Death might do if given the time, little did he know they would become a book that would inspire so many to live their best lives. Poignant and humorous, Death Wins a Goldfish, Reflections from a Grim Reaper's Yearlong Sabbatical, invites us to make the most of the big - and more importantly, little - moments in our lives.
The grief we experience after the death of a friend can be very isolating in a society that often minimizes the significance of a non-family loss, leading to complex, disenfranchised grief. Death educator Dr. Sara Murphy joins us to talk about how we can be present and supportive when someone we care about experiences the death of a friend.
Grief can be difficult for anyone who has experienced a loss, but grief following the death of a loved one to suicide can be particularly complex. Shannon Donnick, Senior Manager of Loss & Healing Programs for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, joins us to talk about this unique kind of loss and how we can move forward on our grief journey in healthy ways.
Author and cemetery expert Loren Rhoads takes us on a journey to discover more about the final resting places of our ancestors, other family and friends - perhaps even our own. Loren helps us consider how visiting a cemetery can not only help us feel closer to loved ones who have died, but also give us a better understanding of the history of our families, the world around us, and our place in it.
Author and cemetery expert Loren Rhoads takes us on a journey to discover more about the final resting places of our ancestors, other family and friends - perhaps even our own. Loren helps us consider how visiting a cemetery can not only help us feel closer to loved ones who have died, but also give us a better understanding of the history of our families, the world around us, and our place in it.
In her book, From Scratch, A Memoir of Love, Sicily, and Finding Home, producer, actor and author Tembi Locke shares the poignant love story of her life with her husband Saro, his terminal illness and how she and her daughter Zoela found ways to move forward in their grief following his death. Tembi joined us to share her very personal story about life, love and loss.
We often hear about therapy dogs in nursing homes or hospices, but, increasingly, therapy dogs are also finding themselves at home in local funeral homes. Beth Johnson from Ultimate Canine, and Bob Prout and Julia Prout from Prout Funeral Home in New Jersey, join us to talk about the Prout’s therapy dog, Morris V. Prout, and how his training helped him provide comfort to people who are grieving.
Dr. Sara Murphy joins us to discuss the incredible toll mass-fatality events are having on each of us personally and collectively as a nation. Recorded shortly after the mass shootings at Tops Friendly Markets in Buffalo, New York, and at Robb Elementary School in Uvalde, Texas, this episode explores how we can try to move forward in our grief following these and other mass-fatality events.
Claire Bidwell Smith, therapist, grief expert and author of three books, returns to the Remembering A Life podcast to talk about her book The Rules of Inheritance, a memoir about the years before and after the deaths of both of her parents. In this episode we explore the unique grief that follows the death of a parent and how Claire, having lost both parents by age 25, began and continues on her complicated grief journey. We’ll also talk about how she keeps the memories of her parents alive for herself and her children who were never able to meet their grandparents.
Doug Middleton, a free agent safety in the National Football League, played college football at Appalachian State and signed with the New York Jets as an undrafted free agent in 2016. Following the death of his best friend AJ by suicide, Doug embarked on a mission to raise awareness of the importance of taking care of one's mental health, concentrating on the African-American community and student athletes. To that end, he founded Dream the Impossible (dreamtheimpossible.org). The work he does is inspiring and is making a difference in the lives of thousands of people.
We often think about to whom we will leave what we consider our most valued possessions – our jewelry, books, artwork, or other meaningful items – after we die. But what about our personal values, the lessons we’ve learned, and our dreams for others? Dr. Barry Baines invites us to consider how writing an ethical will can help us put our values on paper and leave a lasting and meaningful legacy.
Inspired early in the pandemic by the image of refrigerated trucks in Queens holding the remains of people who had died of COVID-19 and haunted by thoughts of how survivors would begin to cope, Terry Werth set out to give them a voice. A little more than a year later, a compilation of their stories was published. Terry joined us for a discussion about love, life and loss during the pandemic.
Young mourners can often feel a bit lost at a funeral, but there are meaningful ways to help them say goodbye to their loved one and to honor their grief. Funeral directors Lanae Strovers and Melissa Posey Loose experience first-hand how the death of a loved one can affect children, and how involving them in the funeral or memorial service can help them move forward on their unique grief journey.
When Dr. Joseph Stern’s sister was diagnosed with leukemia, it turned his world upside down. In his book, "Grief Connects Us: A Neurosurgeon’s Lessons on Love, Loss, and Compassion," Dr. Stern captures the hope and heartbreak experienced by so many families when faced with a terminal illness. He joined us to share how his experiences transformed the approach he takes to caring for patients.
Recovery expert Robert Jensen has the unimaginable task of recovering remains and personal effects at the sites of the world's largest mass fatality events. His book, Personal Effects, is an unsparing, up-close look at the difficult work Jensen does behind the yellow tape. He joins us to talk about how recovering the dead has taught him how to better care for the living.
It's not uncommon for people to struggle with their faith after the death of a loved one. This month's episode invites us to explore our grief through the lens of our faith and how our faith may be tested during this difficult time. Guest Shelley Craig from Faith & Grief Ministries encourages listeners to consider how they can honor their loved ones through faith-based practices and traditions.
The holidays can be difficult when we’re grieving – or supporting someone who is. Alex Mammadyarov, a writer and psychotherapist specializing in grief, joins us for a conversation about the challenges of grieving during the “happiest time of the year” and how we can continue to move forward in our grief during a time when family and friends are gathering to celebrate.
Dominic Carella, soon-to-be Managing Partner of Donohue-Cecere Funeral Home in Westbury, New York, was one of the first funeral directors to arrive at Ground Zero following the terrorist attacks on September 11, 2001. In the months that followed, he would serve more than 75 families who experienced the devastating loss of a loved one that day.
Christie Whitaker, a funeral director at Whitaker Funeral Home in Newberry, South Carolina, was one of many funeral professionals who volunteered their time in New York City following the terrorist attacks on 9/11. Whitaker managed the Family Assistance Center, providing support to families searching for information about missing loved ones.
Bryant Hightower, a funeral director at Martin & Hightower Funeral Home in Carrollton, Georgia, drove to New York City shortly after the terrorist attacks and spent several months there. He served at the Family Assistance Center, contacting families of the people who were on the planes. He also worked with the medical examiner to put together post-mortems so remains could be identified.
John Carmon, funeral director and president of Carmon Community Funeral Homes, spent three weeks in New York City after 9/11 and returned 15 times in the months that followed. John had many informal interactions with people whose loved ones were missing, guiding many in creating “honor rituals” at home. He also assisted in honoring a service dog that was killed in the attacks.
Remembering A Life is honored to share the stories of four funeral directors who, with scores of their colleagues, helped families, communities and our nation begin to heal after the September 11 terrorist attacks. Whether they supported families, helped identify remains or held services for loved ones, funeral professionals are among the humble, unsung heroes of this unfathomable tragedy.
Following the deaths of her parents four years apart, Rebecca Soffer, a political satirist at the time, was inspired to fill the hole they left by helping others live richly through their loss. To that end, she co-founded Modern Loss, a place to share the unspeakably taboo, unbelievably hilarious and unexpectedly beautiful terrain of navigating your life after a death – beginners are welcome.
When confronted with loss, the benefits of engaging in meaningful activities and experiences that help to express grief are often overlooked. We are never taught how to grieve; however, there are ways to work through the emotional turmoil that often coincides with loss. Catherine Tyink and Christine Kortbein invite us to reimagine our grief, using creative ways to move forward after a loss.
Author Colet Abedi is well-known as a contemporary romance and young adult fiction author, so she surprised even herself when she was inspired to write a sci-fi trilogy following her father's death. Breed brings to life her father's vision of how all beings in the animal kingdom are interconnected. Learn more about how this powerful story of life, loss and the very soul of our existence was born.
When her father passed away, Linda Cohen’s busy life as a mother, wife, and entrepreneur came to a screeching halt. She took a spiritual sabbatical to work through her grief and came out of it resolved to embark upon a project: perform 1,000 acts of kindness "mitzvahs" to honor her father’s memory. Learn about Cohen's journey from sorrow to inspiration through simple daily acts of kindness.
When we hear the term “doula,” we probably most often think of a birth doula – someone who helps bring new life into the world. However, increasingly, doulas are also helping people through their final days. Guest Marggie Hatala has been an end-of-life doula for six years, providing families with in-home end-of-life support prior to and throughout the dying experience.
After losing both of her parents at a young age, grief expert Claire Bidwell Smith was drawn to helping others navigate their grief. A therapist in private practice for over a decade, she has counseled thousands of people and written three books. In this episode Claire reflects on the role anxiety has played in her grief journey and how we can identify and manage our own anxiety following a loss.
Not long ago, green funerals were a relatively foreign concept, but, increasingly, families are choosing this eco-friendly approach when laying a loved one to rest. Guests Bob Prout and Julia Prout from Prout Funeral Home in Verona, New Jersey, share how green funerals can be a meaningful option for anyone wanting to say goodbye in a beautiful, natural setting while also reducing their footprint.
While gathering guidelines have prevented thousands of families from having in-person funerals or memorial services, virtual memorials have given many the opportunity to support each other, say goodbye and begin to mourn. Guests Barry Koch and Jason Zamer from TGBeyond share how technology has helped to fill a void for so many families who are grieving the death of a loved one during the pandemic.
Anyone who has experienced the death of a loved one during the pandemic understands the profound ways in which it has affected their ability to say goodbye and begin to grieve. Gathering restrictions and isolation have complicated grief for many. Dr. Sara Murphy helps us find ways to honor the lives of our loved ones, support others who are grieving and find comfort on our own grief journeys.
The death of a loved one is one of life's most difficult experiences, and when a loved one dies during the COVID-19 pandemic, regardless of the cause of death, beginning the grief journey can be more complex due to physical distancing and gathering restrictions. Dr. Sara Murphy, a death educator, certified thanatologist and suicidologist discusses the realities of grief during the pandemic.
Talking to a child about death can be challenging. Whether a child has recently experienced the death of a family member, friend or even a beloved pet, adults are often unsure where to start when speaking with children about their loss. In this episode, children’s book authors Lacie Brueckner and Katherine Pendergast offer suggestions for talking with children about loss in meaningful ways.