FiveDdad: Recent Episodes
FivDdad
This time this day 55 years today, we heard an up and coming group of visionaries, sing and say, "we never needed anybodies help in any way, but now those days are gone".... we're no longer so secure, scientists and researchers are working night and day for that all important cure,
our independence seemed to vanish in the haze but it's our collective spirit that will inspire us to navigate this maize,
minds are quickly changing, previously locked doors now open, capitalism as we know it is falling, well here's hoping, but in its place we must not haste a void to fill in time with pace,
together we'll soon be on our feet and by George, by John, Paul, and Ringo Star, we'll appreciate the the time we get to meet, with our loved ones, dear friends we'll hug and greet, and we'll appreciate them being around, with spirits hoisted heartily from the ground and we need this like we've never done before, the little things that we could somehow previously ignore.
Our lives have changed in oh so many ways Our lives have changed but we're somehow getting through these days.
....."regardless of the truth and regardless of the time, it's now time to look around us, at our behaviours, both yours and mine. Treat others as you would like to be treated as the famous preaching goes, I for one am not too bothered on which day a wise man once rose. I am oncerned however about our children and how we endeavour to dig as deep as we can go and rise up with dignity, together...."
"....time to cultivate a sense and perspective of gratitude and challenge this attitude for us and ours to not just survive but thrive..." No more poor me....please!
Strange times but who's to blame? Is it the Governments again? The so leaders and corporations from China, US, Britain or here in Spain?......who knows but as this world wide pandemic grows not shrinks, something stinks...
".......Strange times for parents to be bringing a baby into this world,
opening eyes, body, soul to be unfurled"
In an effort of both self preservation and contemplation as well as somehow attempting to document the hear and now from a spot and city and nation and world surrounded and confounded by information and misinformation overload, fear mongering blended with genuine compassionately driven sound advice on what we can be doing and how we collectively can navigate our daily steps and feet forward.
5dDad will attempt to reduce the weekly waffle and product a daily dose of words in just a minute or two connecting to whats happening on the outside and inside.
make what you will and take what you please.
the first of "strange times" one month in to dealing with new norms as a Dad.
Many people are labelling this period of time as a shut down, lockout, lock in, self isolation, quarantine and the list goes on but what about looking at it and labelling it differently, what about a chance to 'look in', a space that is now provided to us for self reflection rather than this sense of being forced or told what to do, think of this period as a choice we make and take each day to act compassionately for ourselves and for others around us, a chance to catch up on being that person we want to be and to connect and reconnect with those we choose to share our lives with.
5d dad shares some reflections on week 3 or 4 he has now lost count at this point. A transition from lock in to look in and some moments that moved him over the past week to look inwards and reflect outwards. 5dDad also talks about some simple tools he uses to manage stress and axieity and somehow remain in the resilience zone for the sake of his own peace of mind and also those very close to him.
5dDad shares a little movement activity with his daughter and an appreciation of the lighter ways of dealing with the shit that we are all in while celebrating mothers day.
This podcast is as much an act of self compassion and self reflection as an effort to reach out to other folks dealing with life under isolation and curfew as a result of one of the greatest challenges to our humanity in my life time and certainly the biggest challenge posed as a father with responsibilities to be here present and have some answers and ways of dealing with these huge challenges ahead.
- Reflections on one phone call that would make, will make and has made a big difference to my life and our lives as a family.
5dDad catching up on quite a lot since the last podcast. Reporting from India before embarking on an extremely exciting journey 'Home' to his family for Christmas after his longest trip away from his partner, little girl and also shared in this episode, unborn child on the way in 2020!
He talks about the joyous relief felt by himself and his partner upon hearing that they will become parents for the second time after going through a lengthy process of trails, tribulations and disappointments just like so many other youthful but not so young parents over the past year or so and even starting the process of IVF only to find out just two weeks ago the wonderful news of being pregnant once again!
Closing this short episode from a hustling a busling Southern India city with background evening traffic to content with, 5dDad talks about how grateful he is to be bringing his daughter up where home is for them right now and how different it would be for both daughter and parents in their fears and realities, dealing with such frightening levels of direct, structural and cultural violence on a daily bases.
finally, we get a sense of excitement about the journey home he is now just starting like so many fathers who return home every year to their loved ones for Christmas and celebration together and how special this feels. Enjoy and happy Christmas to all!
Staying on the topic of male fertility this morning, 5dDad shares insights into proceedure and thought processes of getting your sperm tested. It's brief and noisy but real and an honest live reflection on doing something that so many other dad's have to go through especially in today's world but not much conversation is been had amongst men in general about our own fertility and the ins and outs and odds of wanting to become dad's for the first time or again. why is that is a question for another day????
The title question is just one of many amongth 13 minutes of meandering 5dDad reflecrion. The guidelines received translated from Spanish on how to get your sperm from point A to point B in the handiest most hygienic way and ways to deal with ailments as well as fears of what these ailments might be with so many horror story's of degenerative conditions and autoimmune responses that body has to the and deal with. 5dDad is about to embark on a journey of interview and investigation as to what other dad's are thinking, talking and tackling....
5dDad is checking back in after a prolonged silent break.....and doesn't exactly know why but there is plenty to share, to learn and to put out there in the world of positive parenting so why the hell not!
lots to catch up on, longest trip away from daughter and family to India and how that was, trying for a second child and finding it challenging, dad's health experiments and trip home for family wedding as well as finding meaningful work that pays the bills without draining the soul, ethics and energy. Plenty more to come so let the challenging chats restart and the feedback flow to create some interesting audio conversation over the coming months.
This was a 5min check in before jetting off to India where 5dDad is attending and presenting at the first world youth conference on Kindness and he's both super excited and apprehensive to leave his family first the first time for this period of time and this distance away. A strange contrastof emotions fill the air.
He also touches briefly on the topic of families trying to have children but encountering challenges and opening channels of conversation and input from other dad's on this topic. More to follow from India for sure!!
A ritual I appreciate and am so grateful to able to carry out before next steps what ever they may be. So simple yet so affective. A quick dip or immersion in the waters of the coast where I grew up. A Ritual before heading home to create our new home in Madrid.
After a two month Silence, today the 5dDad checks in and explains what's been going on and a wee bit about what will be going on and also the rationale behind the recent silence!
going home again where ever that is...
dealing with positive and negative stresses of moving homes, dealing with buerocracy, rejected mortgages...
& much more while remaining as positive, as honest and as real as possible for the father role. lots more to come over the following weeks so keep an eye open and an ear out!
What's this all about, Autophagy or eating ones self, I know it all sounds a little mad alright but the 5dDad is on a month of experimentation with the carnivore nutrition plan in addition to or catapulted by prolonged fasting and sustained by an intermittant fasting practice.
This is a wee daily check in to see how it's all going and explore a bit about the concept of Autophagy. He believes we will be made much more aware of this mostly untalked about, not so widely documented but potentially massive health breakthrough or indeed 'breakback' into practices carried out for millennia but only coming back in human consciousness and re-exploration due to the huge health crises we are currently faced with.
One of the most rewarding benefits of chosing the way we live our own lives right now is having the lovely privallage of being able to walk my daughter to school in the morning while singing songs and checking in with each other and starting the day on the right foot. I wanted to record just one of these jeouneys today to have it captured and treasured to remind us of all the rest. I feel extremely lucky to have the freedom to make this choice. Thanks for putting a smile on my face first thing. This is definitely not seen as a job or task for me but instead a bonus that I look forward to.
This short podcast was prompted by an overwhelming emotion and feeling of love that bursted out from the 5dDad reemergence stemming from a 72 hour food fast. Listening to a legendary Irish folk song which encapsulates the tragic but real love story of a young women and man at the time of the 1916 rising, Grace Gifford and Joseph Mary Plunkett, how their love was never allowed to flourish with time and this triggering present memories of the beautiful love storys of 5dDads grandparents and the tragic endings which resulted in lonineless and grief to the end of days. It also brought into mind the true and strong feelings of love the 5dDad has for his daughter and life partner and sense of gratitude he has to be able to feel this.
It finishes with that very love song that allowed this emotion of a morning to flow. Grace.
5dDad shares some feedback from his personal fasting experience as he attempts his first 72 hour food fast and explores the motivations and potential health benefits to fasting and also shares his thoughts about a personal challenge he is about to undertake to experiment with two widely contested nutrition plans, the Carnivore diet and the Vegan diet and see how he responds to both after a month of each.
2.45 am, 41 hours into another food fast to explore the real health benefits before deciding to recommend fasting as an activity for a wealth of health and longevity or not....
and I'm buzzing a different and unfamiliar buzz to any I've had before. Today for the first time in our lives we signed a contract to have a secure roof over our heads, a space to create a home for our wee family and build something special with a bit more security of mind and future. Over the coming week or so we will be receiving the keys to our very first family home and it's far from a notion of jumping on a so called property ladder or buying into the capitalist concepts that have propelled this move but more of a case of wanting to ground and base ourselves in one place for more than five minutes for the first time and look to continue discovering directions & harnessing our ambitions but with a sense of one foot on the ground. The true meaning of family support and generosity has shone though for me, something I have yet to experience in such a way and we are truly grateful to those who were able to lend their support and words of encouragement and assist us to walk witj our heads held high to this next step.
We are nearly there....
..................................................................
Are we there yet?
Well, we are almost there little girl with your one little curl, were almost there, and Christ, do your Mam and Dad care, we're gonna get there because we care, because we dare to challenge this world, your world, fears unfurled, no stones unturned, energies being burned but corners turned and so so much learned since you entered our world. Security, stability, peace of mind, papers being signed, we want them becoming reality, for you, your mama and me, foundations layed, deposits paid, the buildings empty, a home to be made, without your mammys family this would be far far from reality, it would never be or even close to be, to see humility, humanity, gratitude and sanity all combined to provide us with hope, seeds being sown, together not alone, almost there..... almost home.
This particular podcast comes a week and a day after 5dDads operation of a sensitive nature. He shares in real time and real words and honesty just how he feels 7 days on and describes his currently reality in terms of dealing with Pain as a concept and reality but hopes it's only temporary and shares empathy with others out there with chronic levels of pain which must be an immense challenge.
A day where the feeling of waking with some amount of physical pain and seeing and empathising with those who have chronic pain everyday and how easily it could overshadow opportunities to be with your kids smiling and enjoying their playfulness and childish company. Today I'm so thankful to spend time with my little daughter, for her natural and effortless pain relief and allowing me to go to sleep with a smile and not a frown. gracias hija!
Darkness into light bleakness to bright fighting our biggest toughest strongest fight, mental health, mental wealth dealing with the cards we're dealt just hearing daily lives being lost our hearts do melt. every family, community, village and town, every city, every region every country known, we must act out for our children, open ears, many tears allow those frowns be turned upside down, actions driven by compassion not elections or agendas our people's lives are ending and many are still not comprehending, it's now, now now or never for so many, too bloody many, families carrying this horrendous hurt that is too bloody heavy, it's about saving lives not saving every penny, just open our eyes and open our arms and open our hearts, open today. How are you feeling, conas atà tu, it's ok if your feeling not ok. Some days are good and some days are crap and some times you need a wee pat on the back, a dig out of a hole, a chat with a soul who listens for free, sees me as me and offers a life line, it's called empathy, with dignity and without it, who are we? lightness to dark can only feel stark but know that there's ways, there's people and places that work with you, walk with you offer kind faces. darkness to light when the sun rises bright, seeing your future and believing its right, knowing you matter and feeling you care as there's so many out there with whom you can share. Today and tomorrow, next week and next year, walking together reduced the fear, one step at a time, it's yours and it's mine, if it raises awareness and hope then it's fine. This morning I woke, RIP, yet another, this evening in my home town, shedding tears is a mother, who can't help wonder why, how, if only, their lives from this point torn asunder. And I know many good friends at this very point in time are struggling for answers and are battling to climb their mountains, their worries, obstacles that feel high but brothers and sisters you don't need to... sigh all you want and cry on a shoulder because tomorrow your stronger, braver and bolder to take on those woes and challenge our foes as living is better and God only knows, as families can tell you and fathers cry but to bring back their daughters or son's is a lie. darkness to light darkness to light. just get to tomorrow and I hope you sleep tight!
oiche mhaith
When my energies low and I don't really know exactly why or how to boost it back up, and I do give a fuck, so rather than beat myself down or wear a big frown I'd rather use the opportunity and build on the now and hears a suggestion of just how, I will set a wee goal to connect with my role as a dad who wants to be better. I can't exercise at least for a while so I'll use my brain differently to produce a wee smile while learning and growing and not feel like owing, or down on my luck as I mentioned before I do give a look on the bright side, I'm living in Spain where the weather, well I can't complain and I should take advantage and learn some of their language and I think that it's time, it's fine, responsibility is mine, all my excuses are gone and it's now I move on to putting my word where my mouth is....so your 5dDad will make you retrospectively glad to put in a 5dDad effort and for the next 5 days I'll kick start new ways and your daddy's learning spanish with a growth spurt. I'll say hola/hello to 5am go for an hour of Spanish in the morning and before you know I'll be beginning to sow the seeds of your mother tongue language and look back at this grind with some craic of mine when your daddy seemed so bloody silly, for it took all this time, 12 years have gone by and it wasn't till he got the snip to his Willy that he grabbed the bull by the balls and answered the calls to start learning the language of the people, who he lives with right now and wondered just how in the name of sweet Jesus start pulling the plough. so I'll leave you with that and start walking the path of properly learning this idiomas. tomorrow at five I'll be coming alive and we'll see where it takes us from there, I'll show you I care and I'm happy to bare all crappy spanish if it gets me to where I want and need to be, your mother, you and me, understanding, communicating and connecting to our new community. thats it from me ....
This is the year of no regrets and a podcast with no limits, no topics are off bounds and 5dDad is happy to be the ginny pig, put himself out there in order to provoke & challenge conversation & chat about things not chatted about as well as give an ould insight or two into real experiences as he progresses on his journey as a dad and partner. This podcast is on that limit for sure, get ready to cringe, wince and hopefully share some empathy, learning anything at all is not obligatory but simply a bonus! "I thought, ah feck it, sure if I'm going to have to go through it, I may as well have a bit of craic and bring others there with me, sorry folks!".
Dear Daughter,
Another special day as a dad and one to remember as part of me today left forever, a very small part of me all the same and when I say the big C, thankfully it's not the big C we all tend to have in our heads when it comes to health and hospitals. At 8am your daddy was in hospital today to have a circumcision carried out finally after a stay of execution two weeks ago where I got the wrong day, today was the right day and to be very honest it was not that bad of a proceedure at all in the end, the phychological fear of pain and was the most challenging bit but it all went as smoothly as it could have so far at least. I had to shave all my genital hair and get that checked for approval which was funny in itself and itchy as hell but other than that, no medication, food or drink prior to the wee op which I did for 36 hours only to find out today that I only needed 6 hours fasting, anyway! oh, and a sleeping pill they gave me to take last night and another this morning so my energy was pretty low going in but I think I used this to my advantage and managed to get some small breathing drills in the waiting room just to 'take the edge off' (no pun intended) any anxiety I may have had. Having your mammy there was also a big help in terms of comfort and also with practical language assistance as the last thing I wanted to get mixed up was a vasectomy for cucrcucision as they were being carried out in the same ward apparently!. It's certainly not something I'd recommend anyone doing for the craic so unless it was medically necessary like in my case, no need to even entertain the imagety! but the hope is that it will now cause your daddy less pain and discomfort and allow much more pleasurable time going well into the future in attempting to create a bigger family so you dear daughter can have the gift of a brother or sister. Put very simply, my forskin was too tight like so many other men and boys out there causing a lot of unnecessarily anx when making love and now I have no forskin to create this pain or discomfort, just some stitches and healing and getting used to the new look, forskinless! Your daddy now joins 33% of the world's male population who are also circumsied according to WHO?!! the world health organisation! Here in Spain it's around 7% and back in Ireland it's as low as 3.5% so I'm not as alone as I thought and I've certainly had a lot more interesting chats about penises and other male health issues that would be considered embarrassing to talk about now that I've opened the door to chat about such things. so as you sleep tightly in your loving grandparents again this evening oblivious to all the circumcision shenanigans of the way, I begin the healing and move through an unexpected thresshhold or right of passage that in many parts of the world, would make me more ready for fatherhood and manhood. One last interesting thing that I found quite powerful during this whole process being aware of how other tribes and groups treat this proceedure, in terms of not showing grimace or fear or acts of cowardlyness throughout, as I lay there in the hospital with doctors, surgeons, anethatists all around me, I somehow had a strong sense of peace and calm come over me and felt the presence of my grandfather who you dear daughter are named after, he was just there and the tranquillity of his familiar and soothing voice in my minds eye was so comforting and guiding as the elder of our clann was approving in some way. It was almost nice this experience although unusual and it was over in no time at all. There was no pain, I little prick (sorry again for the horrible unintended pun) I felt where the needles went in for the local anaesthetic and I definitely remember a strange smell which was more than likely from the surgeons cortorising the skin to prevent bleeding and a couple of hours later, I was back in the comfort of our home resting. C day was to be today and tomorrow is yet another free day, rest day, growth day, day of possibilities and potentials...
Dear daughter,
as your proud daddy breaths in the sweet but subtle fragrances of the rose garden where we come so often, today in full spring bloom and glory , with the chirpiest of choruses from an eclectic mix of little birdies or pio pio's as you call them, I reflect back on a little dander through the winedy, wealthy, lofty suburbs of Madrid just now pushing only your babyless buggy filled with some of your belongings in black plastic bags that I collected from friends of friends who were giving them back after a lend out, that's neither here nor there but somehow I feel the need to justify and this is part of today's theme I suppose... dear daughter please don't go through life feeling the need to justify yourself, your choices, your being, your ways and your wonders, for there is no need. Just be, do, think, feel, wonder, question, re-question, filter, answer and reflect when you want because you want but please don't justify like your daddy has and felt the need to do so for most of his childhood and adult life but not knowing why. Silly things, small things but midsets change as life changes us. Like, I remember, honestly when I was younger feeling embarrassed or ashamed at not having things that others had in terms of material wealth, like a car, or then having a crappy family car and not feeling it was enough to fit into the fake appearance of wealth and just some years later, after having the life lessons under my belt of living in the global south for some time, having similar feelings of shame or embarrassment about having so much more material goods than others who I had lived with and respected as equals with different starting points on different points of different continents. In both cases, maybe I wasn't comfortable or content in my own skin but now and you have helped me fit my skin so much more comfortably this, so thank you. You have enhanced my learning and forced me to look at things so differently with a new clearer lense and in just under 2 years of your tutorage, I have learned more than the previous 3 decades about myself. So I wheeled your bustling black bag filled buggy past business men and business women, professionals dressed as professions dress and only today, 22 hours into a food fast and feeling a wee bit more reflective as a result, before going into hospital in the morning for a minor but hopefully liberating procedure, feeling the city heat and glare but feeling like a distant observer rather than active reactor and participant. I was seeing and recognising the looks from passers-by, gawking more towards the content of the buggys black bags than the bags under your daddy's eyes from a restless nights sleep caused by disturbing and distressful goings on in the apartment below us, more than likely domestic violence and where thankfully your compassionate, wise and empathetic mother called the authorities that-be to intervene when it went beyond the point of just willing observers or nosy neighbours. These same passers-by observed my feet also in a strange but not so unfamiliar prolonged glancing sort of way only to see a sockless, sandal wearing individual and up the leg to a pair of casual but informal shorts to be accompanied by a free sports t-shirt given out to those who put their names and limbs forward to partake in some sort of run or race or physical challenge .... and up to the face where they would have seen a semi bearded, slightly browned but not off, grinning (not smirking), daddy aged, foreign looking face. But maybe all these observations were just in my head I thought for a second until the next almost identical experience and another and my grin and curiosity only increased. How was I feeling? the need to justify my attire and buggy contents? like I wanted to speak to these kind folks and explain something of my appearance slightly akin to those they may see on a daily basis walking these same financially well off streets in search of valuable throw always or food or something worth something in the large wheelie bins that establish themselves on almost every street to be tilted into the noisy bin lorries in the early hours of the morning where most of these friendly but maybe friendless business looking folks are more than likely asleep in another affluent residential part of town. I mean, who the hell cares if I appear to be like the so called underclasses, migrant classes socially deprived, marginalised, borderline homeless, homeless, fringed folk...at first glance? .... me? does your daddy care? Sometimes in the past he did but not today as he realises that he has a lot more in common with people within these fridge-communities from his more recent life experience and choices and may well feel more at home and less judged, less judgemental and justifiable amongst folks who know the power-struggles but struggle anyway, feel the massive power imbalances in our society from every inch and angle but don't necessarily look Down or Up at people based on how they appear at street level. Dear daughter, my little wander through the streets today to retrieve your spare high chair and some surplus toys that you were able do without for friends when needed, taught me many things about the need to constantly feel real empathy, for those who have and maybe have not as much material wealth and opportunities through no fault of their own but through circumstances and through current political and social structures that are in place to make sure the haves, have much more material wise and keep having and feeling ok to have and the haves much less financially and materially keep struggling to have a sustainable, dignity filled life rather than just survival. To walk in shoes and fancy clothes worth lot's and to walk barefoot or push or be pushed in a buggy, wheelchair..... and feel the stair are both worthwhile experiences and will hopefully make your daddy think twice tomorrow about falling into the trap of judging others on the street based on what they are pushing or not or reacting to those same glares, staires...who cares?? Not you dear daughter. Snobbery is robbery of empathy its clear to me and you're buggy today helped me see ...so let it be, let it be, whisper words of wisdom, let it be
dear daughter, as the final mothers days rays of sunshine and light alter from bright orange mixed with bright blues to a more velvitty bluey, purpley, perfectly suited dusk, falling over your second city of Madrid, I look back on your day. you rose this morning with love penetrating your young veins transmitted by hugs from three generations of mothers who poured uncontrolled, unadulterated and unconditional love into your body, your skin and your soul, directly from theirs, their hearts touched yours today and every other day and they see you and yours returned the favour and shone innocent beautiful smiley love straight back to them. No flowers or chocolates or cards needed, your present being as the cliche goes was ample enough and the the triplet of mothers received your gift with open arms. You opened your eyes to see your mother's eyes gazing back at you and opened your bedroom door to see your grandmother's wide open smile to accompany her wide open arms and after breakfast a visit to your great grandmother in the residential home on her 94th year and to see her whole demeanour, body language gestures transformed and beemed with positive energy upon seeing you was precious for me and for all who witnessed it. Three generations of proud mothers intertwined in a special moment. and on the journey from your great grandmothers village towards home, we hear of devastating news filtering and penetrating through from Gaza today, yet again and of daughters and mothers and grandmothers alike being so cruelly and innocently wiped off this earth, their sky lights a similar colour this evening and their love for one another has the same strength and weight and their compassion for family and for togetherness the same heartfelt connection, their rights and realities worlds apart. Both great happiness and great sadness fill my mind and heart this evening as I reflect on both real situations that affect me and realise how lucky and privallage I am, we are and how we must fill this and love this and live this to the full while triplets of mothers in another lands close to us are not allowed to live lives at all and much of the world turns a blind eye, conveniently so. sleep well in comfort and safety dear daughter and dear mothers.
comfort zones, resilient zones, delayed gratification, perspective from the top of peaks, projections into the future and clarity of mind and purpose. try not to look up and gasp at the size, or height or steepness of the climb of journey ahead but try and take each path, each turn or bend ahead as your micro goal and take energy from passing by each one and progressing to the next one with an inner grin of satisfaction and determination to get to the next one, take in the beautiful and wonderful sights and scenes and smells and touches from rays off powerful sun on your brow and store these natural treasures as for sure you will need them as the climb gets tougher at points along the way, store them like a reservoir stores water for times of drought and know they are there when you need to call upon them and you always have them if you have to dig deep. false summets can be hard on the mind and body and there may be many but they make the real summets even sweeter when you get there and do enjoy them, cherish them and bank them in your memory for they are part of your resilient zone now and you can build on them as real memory in the muscle, mind and soul. two evenings ago I climbed the hardest peak I've ever done by bike and went deep into my stretch zone and pushed that resilience a little more and as I knew I had done it and it didn't break me, now this morning I went another 30 or 40% more again knowing I could and these zones have elasticity to be pushed when motivated no matter how hard they seem, step by step, Paso y Paso, stein po Stein, shwaya shwaya...life is like this for sure and we only 'learn by doing' in this respect. almost 12 years ago from the summit of Africa's highest peak of which I had no right to be, with obstacles & injuries in my way to navigate, I sent out a message on an old phone towards your mammy who was here in Spain at the time and somehow it reached her and with the perspective, confidence and energy that climb gave me I reached out to the person I would one day soon fall more in love with, raise a family with and share special wonderful moments with into the future.. dear daughter. climb your mountains and peaks and reach out, bag the energy and confidence and ideas that come along the way and follow them up with compassion for yourself and others when you decend. there will always be lows as well that life may throw at you but knowing we can climb back up is gold of the mind and not just settling to go from low moments to ok but from low to flow and to flourishing.
Now and again we really do need to press the reset button, gain real perspective & take time out with good people and if we are related to them even better, laugh share precious moments that we can remember and talk about into our future and that little special touch of being in clean nature to top it off. happy days dear daughter
Straight up, apologoes for the difficult audio! it was an idea that may not have come good in terms of recording while on the bike and hearing what I was hearing on the move. Today was stating the obvious, I don't have all the answers to important things in my daughter's life like knowing the best form of education to choose but I will do my best to find these answers and make informed decisions.
Today is the 5dDads 1st daily experiment where he attempts to share a daily 5 min reflection, question or chat with his daughter who is not yet of the age to comprehend fully the concepts or conversations but will one day soon. Today is about sharing mostly do's in life and a rare don't. 364 to go!!
Unlucky podcast 13 could have been so much more positive had the 'snip' gone ahead last week but instead challenges the 5dDad to his real relationship with alcohol and documents one blow out too many as well as attempts to deal with it in natural but experimental way while calling it a day for now to the demon booze and opening up conversations with others as to our national conversations around dealing with this drug.
5dDad is about to become a ‘Papa minus part of his prick’ and I share some of my honest fears and anxieties ahead this foreskin chop which sounds painful whatever way you think about it BUT is for the good of my physical health, as myself and my partner attempt to become parents again. Ritual and rights of passage enter this rare but real rant and I even manage to bring in Nelson Mandela somewhere along the line!
This is a poem, sent into the 5dDad Podcast by one of the ‘3 little girls called Ciara’ who we opened podcast 11 about. A British Soldier murdered her uncle Jim Wray on Bloody Sunday and she writes this poem about her ‘Da’ Liam Wray, who fought & continues fighting till this day for justice and dignity for his family and all the other families who had loved ones brutally taken from them on that day in Derry, 1972. Ciara observes her Da standing by the sink, washing dishes with his ‘medium sized frame, crouched over shoulders used to carrying an unmanageable weight…’
Podcast 11 is a continuation from last week's and focuses on Bloody Sunday from the perspective of one family who have been fighting for justice for 47 years for their son, brother, uncle, Jim Wray who was murdered by soldier "F" of the British Parachute Regiment. This soldier awaits to be prosecuted and Jim's brother Liam talks to the 5dDad from Derry.
This podcast covers the recent decisions made by the Public Prosecutions Service in Northern Ireland to bring charges for murder against just one soldier for the massacres that took place on the 30th of January 1972. 5dDad interviews Paul Doherty, who's Dad was shot dead and killed on bloody Sunday by this same soldier according their own Seville Inquiry. Paul speaks candidly about what happened and the affects for him and his family and how they will continue to fight for justice.
Heading home from one place to another and attempting to explore just how this feels and what it even means but 5dDad is not alone as so many around the world can appreciate some of this experience, those who have moved away and then return 'home' from time to time. Many different emotions and nostalgic feelings, some positive and others more challenging. 5dDad shares one of his techniques of threshold or checking in by immersion in cold water, a quick dip in the Irish sea as he walks his daughter along the coastal town where he grew up. Apologies for some poor audio due to strong wind.
Today's podcast is simply a continuation from our last episode on forgiveness. We delve a wee bit further into the theory behind forgiveness and hear of two honest examples from the conflict in the North of Ireland which encourage and lay the foundations as well as inspirations for peace on the island of Ireland.
Please be encouraged to leave a comment or suggestion on the Podbean comments section and keep tuned in for lots more variety and discussions to follow.
Just like the title of the famous song from Irish musical family, the Corrs, this weeks podcast explores a very personal even intimate example from the 5dDad and the journey of forgiveness he is on for the sake rebuilding relationships and setting good examples for the next generation and his daughter for now.
It’s Valentines week but this is anything but a romantic picture of what fatherhood entails. We have an audio photo depicting the raw realities of being a Da, seeing them in action or evaluating what it was like to have them missing in action. We hear from other fathers who attempt to use lessons passed on from their old men, as well as from some who are not Da’s but have certainly learned a lot from observing their own or seeing others step in and up to take the role of the Da.
Episode 5 explores the idea that we all have choices to make and the feeling of freedom and happiness we can gain from knowing we are the ones in control and in the driving seat when it comes to making these choices. 5dDad shares a personal story about being in an serious road accident and the choices that followed in the aftermath, right up to the present day and the choices he faces as a dad.
This week's podcast is all about Happiness and what actually is Happiness??? 5dDad shares some simply tools and resources to explore this theme in greater dept and gives the listeners a simple conversational challenge for the week in order to communicate, connect and commit to the people around us in a way that opens us to more empathy, compassion and contributes to a happier future relationship without barriers.
5dDad explores the Ins and outs of the largely unexplored topic which is Sexual Transmutation and possible links to positive physical, emotional and even spiritual benefits and also the links between the scary world of porn and its unhealthy effects on ourselves, our society and our children. We also touch on topics such us family security, working less while having more and deal with many responses from 5dDad listeners.
5Ddad 2nd Episode is all about getting the interactions going and the questions and comments flowing, as well as a little 'Cold Water Challenge' for any Dad's, Dad's to be or those who's dads sperm were in some way responsible for creating thee (Everybody!).
This very first Episode of the 5d Dad is only 563 days behind schedule! It gives the listener an insight as to what is to come down the line while introducing the rationale behind the 5d Dad concept and a brief look at the question behind the podcast, HOW CAN I PROTECT YOU IN THIS CRAZY WOLRD? A real and honest look at the fears, anxieties and excitement of becoming a dad in this in this 'Crazy World' that we live in in 2019 and how do we deal with this question best.