Show Notes - Adoptees On

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For our last episode before our summer break, we’re talking about adoptees and money! Marta Isabella Sierra Cifuentes, LMHC is back and teaching us all about money, worthiness, the obvious commodification of children, the basics. Marta said it best in this episode, ”if you're adopted, it's not even about the money. It's about belonging, respect, feeling seen, feeling acknowledged, mattering to the other people and equality.”

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Marta's practice is focused on adult adoptees of the global majority. You can connect with her about her upcoming therapy groups at martasierralmhc [at] gmail [dot] com * Haley’s new project, follow along: OnAdoption.net

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We have two incredible adoptee activists with us today. Maria Diemar and Lisa Wool-Rim Sjöblom, both adopted in Sweden, joined up to elevate adoptee causes in some very impactful ways. Maria is the subject of Lisa’s latest graphic novel, The Excavated Earth, which exposes a horrific story of how thousands of Chilean babies were literally kidnapped and stolen to be sold for adoption to Sweden and many other countries. You won’t believe some of the shocking details that Maria and Lisa share with us today. Lisa also shares a few thoughts with us on the findings of the South Korean Truth and Reconciliation Commission.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Maria and Lisa’s English podcast, Lifting the Adoption Fog: https://open.spotify.com/show/4M5YBT7mvqSsNv7RQWte1B and on Instagram * Maria and Lisa’s Swedish podcast, Den talande tystnaden - Adoption utifrån: https://open.spotify.com/show/6fOJACexeBwlXjL44oAax6 * Hijos y Madres del Silencio: https://hijosymadresdelsilencio.cl/ * The email address to the Chilean Special Police PDI: adopcionesirregulares_casantiago@pjud.cl * "The Family Law and Parental Support Authority is organised under the Ministry of Health and Social Affairs. Director General Per Bergling leads the authority, together with his management team. The authority has also an advisory council": MFoF in English (mfof.se) * MFoF has uploaded the form from the Chilean special police, PDI, that adopted people outside Chile can download, fill out and email to the crime investigation regarding their cases: Formulario Incorporación de Información desde el Extranjero (Ingles).pdf

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is Dr. Michele Merritt - a philosophy professor who’s coined the new term Adoptism to describe the ways adoptees are marginalized. Michele shares some of her personal story, including the curiosity she always had about where she came from. We discuss what lead her to start critiquing adoption publicly and the barriers to publishing these critiques that some academic journals put in place, like the classic, “I know one adoptee and they don’t feel that way”.

We do mention suicide during this conversation, so please take care when deciding if this a safe episode for you to listen to.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources We Should Be Fighting for a World Without Adoption by Michele Merritt * Be Grateful or Be Quiet:Confronting the Epistemic Harms of Adoptism by Michele Merritt * What it Cost to be Adopted by Michele Merritt * https://www.michelemerritt.com/ * The Silenced Adoptee * Ryan Gustafson + Adopted Feels podcast * Adoption is Fcked Article https://www.pdcnet.org/pcw/content/pcw_2024_0030_0001_0048_0067) and https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bhsSuTx5Thre03gTc8FWF7SIM3Re5Bx3/edit?usp=sharing&ouid=108187279857953554034&rtpof=true&sd=true

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Craig Mod the author of Things Become Other Things: A Walking Memoir joins us to share his story. We deep dive into Craig’s recent reunion with his birthmother including the complexities of searching in the digital age when so much of our information is publicly available. Being fairly new to adoptee-land, Craig also gave Haley a chance to talk through some of the things that complicate the usual sunshine and rainbows view of adoption. Update - Craig will join us for our July book club when we will be reading Things Become Other Things. Link to event below.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Things Become Other Things: A Walking Memoir by Craig Mod * Craig Mod’s book tour (May/June 2025): https://craigmod.com/books/things_become_other_things/ * How to do The Walk and Talk: Everything We Know * July Book Club https://www.adopteeson.com/calendar/2025julybc

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we’re pleased to introduce you to greiby medina, author of The One Who Loves You the Most. greiby was adopted from Honduras at age two-and-a-half to a single white mother. We discuss changing names, why greiby is not a fan of the term “coming out of the fog”, and being afraid people won’t like us because we’re adopted.

Show NotesFull episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* The One Who Loves You the Most by medina * Adoptees of South America and Extended Latin Americas - website - Facebook Group - Instagram * Out of the Fog and into Consciousness: A Model of Adoptee Awareness by Susan F. Branco, JaeRan Kim, Grace Newton, Stephanie Kripa Cooper-Lewter, and Paula O’Loughlin - download in full here: https://harlows-monkey.com/2022/06/23/coming-to-consciousness/

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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This is a special episode in our Healing Series where we bring on adoptee experts to tackle issues that may impact our mental health. Most often we’re talking with therapists but today I invited Anna Linde, a sexologist, to talk with us about the impacts of childhood sexual abuse on adopted people. This issue is so prevalent in our community and yet hardly anyone ever talks about it. We’ve talked about so many difficult things on the show that I think we’re finally ready. So although we do keep this to a high level discussion, please take care when deciding if this a safe episode for you to listen to.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Coming to our Senses - Sexual Liberation for Adoptees (May 3, May 10, 2025) * https://theadoptedsexologist.com * https://www.instagram.com/theadoptedsexologist/ * Who I Am—or Who You Make Me To Be?: Adult Adoptees Imprisoned by Expectations in Intimate Meetings by Anna Linde

Check out Anna’s Substack here and access her free info sheet for Adoptees On listeners here!

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We’ve reached our 300th episode! I’ve been thinking about this episode for months and was trying to decide what special interview, what special topic, what could I bring you to mark this milestone? And I finally decided, that I wanted to celebrate with my sisters. I found my paternal side of my family 14 years ago, and I discovered that I had three younger siblings. So even though I’m the only adoptee on today’s show, I thought you’d enjoy this peek behind the curtain, exploring what was it like for my young sisters when they were told at age 9 and 12, that they had a surprise older sister. We deep dive what reunion was like for them, the ups and downs, and what things are like for us now. We also have a brother, he was 14 when we first met, and now he’s a very busy young husband and father, and when I spoke about this recording we had his blessing and I think he shares some of the same sentiments that our sisters will share today.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are celebrating Dr. Abby Hasberry’s brand new book, Adopting Privilege: A Memoir of Reinventing My Adoptee Narrative. Abby is a therapist, a scholar, an adoptee and a birth mother. We get into all of it: coercion in adoption, parenting after placing a child for adoption, reunion from both sides, we even talk about sororities! Abby also addresses why so many adoptees go on to place a child for adoption themselves.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Adopting Privilege: A Memoir of Reinventing My Adoptee Narrative by Dr. Abby Hasberry * Check out Abby’s Healing Series episode here * Who is a Worthy Mother by Rebecca Wellington * Relinquished by Gretchen Sisson (link to our book club recording here) * The Seven Circles: Indigenous Teachings for Living Well by Chelsey Luger and Thosh Collins

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We’ve been waiting several years to have today’s guest on, and when better then to celebrate his brand new book! Professor and critical adoption scholar Kit Myers is with us to talk about his new book, The Violence of Love: Race, Family, and Adoption in the United States. Kit is an adoptee from Hong Kong, and he shares some of his personal story including a recent reunion he got to experience a couple of months ago. We also dive into culture camps and what happened when society tried to “destigmatize adoption” for the sake of adoptive parents.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* The Violence of Love: Race, Family, and Adoption in the United States by Kit Myers, Ph.D. * Open access available here - https://www.luminosoa.org/site/books/m/10.1525/luminos.220/ * https://faculty.ucmerced.edu/kmyers6/index.php/2024/07/08/adoptee-temporality-and-grief/ * Mentioned - SunAh Laybourn, Ph.D. episode 273 * When We Become Ours by Shannon Gibney and Nicole Chung

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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I don’t think we’ve ever had anyone on the show that shares today’s guest’s profession! I’m thrilled to introduce you to Chef Adé Carrena, she’s the subject of a beautiful new documentary called Bite of Benin. Adé is passionate about using food as a storytelling tool and has worked to bring West African flavours and spices to a global audience. She shares some of her personal story with us today, including being taken at age ten to the United States with her sister to be adopted. We do mention some difficult topics in this episode, so take good care when deciding to listen.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* A Bite of Benin * Help A Bite of Benin with their crowdfunding campaign * Join us for A Bite of Benin - Adoptees On(ly) Documentary Club on February 26, 2025 * Dounou Cuisine * iléWA Foods * Rewriting Adoption

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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I’m so excited to introduce you to our guest today! We are talking all about open adoption with Connor Howe, who you probably already know as @adopted_connor from his many videos online. We talk about his personal story, including what it’s like to grow up with a sibling that is your adoptive parents’ biological child. We also discuss what lead Connor to get in front of the camera to critique adoption in such a public way.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Connor Howe - YouTube * Connor Howe - TikTok * Caitríona Palmer - An Affair with My Mother

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are starting the year off with such a delight, Lee Herrick, the California Poet Laureate, joins us today! Lee recently released his latest poetry collection, In Praise of Late Wonder, which is focused fully on the topic of adoption. Today we talk about what it means to feel significant as an adoptee, why writing prose felt a little more comfortable than a whole memoir, and we word nerd out a little on crosswords and wordplay.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* In Praise of Late Wonder: New and Selected Poems by Lee Herrick * Our California - https://capoetlaureate.org/ourcalifornia * https://adopteelitfest.com/

With the early 2025 fires in the Los Angeles area, we reached out to Lee to see where he recommended folks send their support, and here are two organizations we can get behind:* American Red Cross * World Central Kitchen

Connect With Us

Lee Herrick: Facebook | Website
Haley Radke: X/Twitter | Instagram | Facebook | haleyradke.com
Adoptees On: X/Twitter | Instagram | Facebook

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are doing a hybrid Healing Series episode with adoptee and adoptee therapist, Kathy Mackechney, LCSW. Kathy shares part of her story with us, including how she was prepared for rejection during her reunions, but was instead surprised by eager acceptance. Getting into the therapy of it all, Kathy is an Internal Family Systems practitioner and has developed the idea that not all of our parts get adopted. We unpack what that means, including that somewhere inside us we can access who we may have been, had we not been separated from our original families. Kathy is one of the first, if not the first, adoptee therapist(s) to have an entire chapter published in a clinical text that focuses on how to work with adoptees - it’s literally the chapter we should assign our therapists to read!

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Kathy’s chapter in Altogether Us: Integrating the IFS Model with Key Modalities, Communities, and Trends - IFS and Adoptees: Healing Parts Burdened by Relinquishment Trauma * Kathy has an upcoming retreat in May 22 - 26, 2025 and more info is available here * Kathy's next "Not All Parts Get Adopted" workshop is January 11, 2025 * Carl Smith - https://www.instagram.com/decsmith50/ * Father Unknown - now on YouTube here

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today I’m so pleased to welcome back Dr. Julie Lopez, author of Live Empowered! We are talking all about how labels can be highly problematic for adoptees. We discuss how nonsensical the term “reactive attachment disorder” is when in fact most of us are just having perfectly normal reactions to an abnormal situation. Dr. Julie is an expert in implicit memory continues to inspire us that change and growth is always achievable and how we can access our pre-verbal traumas.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* https://www.adopteeson.com/therapists/lopez * Dr. Julie Lopez Previous Adoptees On Episodes + 73 [Healing Series] The Resilient Brain Project + 75 [Healing Series] Brainspotting + 103 [Healing Series] Implicit Memory + 104 [Healing Series] The PACT Method * Dr. Julie Lopez

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Shelby Redfield Kilgore is a Korean adoptee and filmmaker. You can watch her documentaries and videos on YouTube alongside 800,000 other folks who’ve already had the pleasure. We talk about Shelby’s passion for sharing adoptee stories and how that shifted in tone over the years. We also talk about her health struggles and the impacts those have had on her reunions and motherhood.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Shelby’s YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@shelbyredfieldkilgore * Rooted in Adoption: A Collection of Adoptee Reflections Edited by Veronica Breaux & Shelby Redfield Kilgore * Adoptee Consciousness Model * Adoption Unfiltered by Sara Easterly, Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard and Lori Holden

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we welcome Kae Wangare Leonard to the show. Kae is a writer, athlete and artist, born and adopted in Kenya by white Americans. She shares some of her story with us, including what does home mean when you’ve lived in multiple countries. We discuss what it means to be an adoption abolitionist, and we have a little disagreement whether Kae’s art, poetry and prose is therapeutic or not!

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* We Are Holding This * going unarmed into the wail * Lightning On My Fingertips

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is filmmaker and fellow podcaster, and fellow Canadian, Kristal Parke! Kristal is the subject of the documentary, Because She’s Adopted. Today Kristal shares some of her story with us including her non-paternal realization, her road to sobriety, her visits back to the Opaskwayak Cree Nation in Manitoba, and meeting many of her biological family members, including her biological father.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Because She’s Adopted - You can rent the film here: https://kristalparke.net/ or here * Coming soon, Because She’s Adopted Podcast * Little Bird

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Kristal Parke: Instagram | Facebook | Website | YouTube
Haley Radke: X/Twitter | Instagram | Facebook | haleyradke.com
Adoptees On: X/Twitter | Instagram | Facebook

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today is part two of a two-part episode that we began last week, with our friend Bruce Porth. Today we talk a little more about reunion and what it looks like when someone is being dishonest with you, and also about using breathwork and psychedelics as healing modalities. Have you ever met one of those people that when they speak you just have to listen to every word? Bruce is one of those people for me. We hope you enjoy getting to know him better with us.

TW: we have brief mentions of suicide and sexual assault in this episode

Show NotesFull episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Going Unarmed into the Wail by Karen Wangare Leonard * Finding adoptee community (check out Adoptees Connect!)

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are so fortunate to hear from Bruce Porth today; he is one of those people that only speaks when he’s got something thoughtful and insightful to share, and today’s conversation is no exception.

Bruce shares about his childhood, some difficult relationship circumstances, his path to uncovering the impact adoption and family separation had on his life, and what reunion has looked like. This is part one of two, and don’t worry, next week we’ll release part two where Bruce shares more about the healing modalities he’s used, including breathwork and psychedelics.

TW: we have brief mentions of suicide and sexual assault in this episode

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Coming at you in part two!

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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On today’s show we’re welcoming Ande Stanley, creator and host of the podcast, The Adoption Files. Ande is a late discovery adoptee, only finding out accidentally when they were in their thirties. We talk about how that happened, and the reactions of adoptive family members to Ande finally being in on the secret everyone knew but them. We also discuss how Ande found their way to the adoptee community and how some initial bad interactions, instead of deterring them, instead lead the way to Ande becoming a community builder.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* The Adoption Files podcast on Apple or Spotify * The Adoption Files blog * All You Had to Do - Severance Magazine * When Religion Hurts You by Laura E. Anderson, Ph.D.

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is Grace Newton, MSW, a Chinese adoptee, author of the prolific blog, Red Thread Broken, and one of the co-authors of the Adoptee Consciousness Model. We discuss the reasons for the rise and fall of international adoption from China, and how the critical adoption scholarship of Chinese adoptees is on the rise, including Grace’s own contributions. Grace also gets more personal, sharing about her relationship with her Chinese American fiancé and how their love story and family have helped her on her racial reclamation journey.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Red Thread Broken blog by Grace Newton, MSW + Ten Years of Red Thread Broken + Learning to Let Home be a Person + Why I (An Adoptive Parent) am not Pro-Adoption + Infantilizing Adoptees Through Photographs * Out of the Fog and into Consciousness: A Model of Adoptee Awareness - https://www.ibpj.org/issues/articles/Susan F. Branco, JaeRan Kim, Grace Newton, Stephanie Kripa Cooper-Lewter, Paula O'Loughlin - ....pdf * China's Hidden Children: Abandonment, Adoption, and the Human Costs of the One-Child Policy by Kay Ann Johnson

Mentions:* ICAR - International Conference on Adoption Research - https://med.umn.edu/pediatrics/events/international-conference-adoption-research-icar8 * ASAC - The Alliance for the Study of Adoption and Culture - https://www.adoptionandculture.org/conference

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s episode is a special episode in our Healing Series. We’re joined by Pam Cordano, MFT, talking all about the seven challenges of adoptee attachment, which include profound ongoing chronic misattunement, disconnection from our instincts, and commodification.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Pam Cordano, MFT’s other episodes

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Pam Cordano, MFT: pcordano@comcast.net
Haley Radke: X/Twitter | Instagram | Facebook | haleyradke.com
Adoptees On: X/Twitter | Instagram | Facebook

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is the remarkable Dr. Alice Diver, law professor and outspoken adoptee advocate. Alice has written multiple journal articles and books on the topic of adoptee rights, including her latest, Genetic Stigma in Law and Literature: Orphanhood, Adoption, and the Right to Reunion. Alice shares some of her personal story with us, and then we dive into her work including language in adoption, where you’ll hear such gems as “surplus people” and “substitute families”. We also get to talk about how adoptees are viewed by the law in comparison with adoptive parents.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Alice Diver on LawPod: Avoiding Origin Deprivation Part 1; Avoiding Origin Deprivation Part 2; Interview with Emily Hipchen, editor of The Alliance for the Study of Adoption and Culture all worth a listen! * Genetic Stigma in Law and LiteratureOrphanhood, Adoption, and the Right to Reunion by Alice Diver https://link.springer.com/book/10.1007/978-3-031-46246-7 * An Episode of Sparrows by Rumer Godden

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Adoptee therapist Cam Lee Small, MS, LPCC is back with us today. Cam has a brand new book out, The Adoptee’s Journey: From Loss and Trauma to Healing and Empowerment, published by a faith-based press. Haley recently got to meet Cam in real life, and he’s just as warm and genuine as he appears on the Internet. In our conversation today, Cam and Haley talk about how most churches have majorly missed the mark in serving adoptees, we address how “gotcha day” misses the “lost-ya day” and the grief of adoption. One of our favourite things Cam shares in his book, is that just being an adopted person takes an extraordinary amount of cognitive and emotional bandwidth.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Cam’s prior appearance on Adoptees On, episode 251 * The Adoptee’s Journey: From Loss and Trauma to Healing and Empowerment by Cameron Lee Small * JaeRan Kim, Ph.D. and her blog Harlow’s Monkey; JaeRan’s episode on Adoptees On, episode 235 * FOG Fazes for the Adult Adoptee PDF

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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The amazing Alison Larkin: stand-up comedian, voice artist, audiobook narrator, actress, producer, screenwriter, and bestselling author of The English American is here with us today! We get to hear her story which includes reunions with both birth parents, seeking out a therapist after meeting Nancy Verrier, and how she finally came to truly fall in love in her fifties only to have her fiancé die suddenly during the pandemic. Alison recounts this in her brand new one-woman show, called Grief…A Comedy which is embarking on a world tour this summer.

TW: There is a brief mention of a suicide attempt in this episode

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Grief…A Comedy by Alison Larkin * The English American by Alison Larkin * Alison Larkin Presents: Great Classic Adoptee Stories * Alison Larkin Presents * Alison Larkin Presents Facebook * The Jane Austen Podcast with Alison Larkin - download wherever you listen to podcasts * Mentioned - Here’s a link to an obituary Alison wrote for her late husband Bhima About Bhima * The Barker Adoption Foundation’s Family and Post-Adoption Services Department - support group

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we’re welcoming Janet Sherlund to the show! Janet is the author of the brand new memoir, Abandoned at Birth: Searching for the Arms that Once Held Me. Janet shares some of her story with us, including her challenging relationship with her adoptive mother, her struggles with anxiety, and the reason she finally felt free to write her memoir.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Abandoned at Birth: Searching for the Arms that Once Held Me by Janet Sherlund * Relinquished by Gretchen Sisson * Primal Wound by Nancy Verrier

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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This week’s guest, Svetlana Sandoval is an international adoptee, adopted from Russia at about six months old. We talk about what sparked an interest to search for her biological family, how she navigated the language barriers using technology and a friend of a friend. Svetlana also shares about her decision to reclaim her original name. Due to the sensitive nature of her reunion during the war, she will not be commenting directly on the conflict.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Lost and Found Heritage: an International Adoptee Journey by Svetlana Sandoval: https://www.adoptionnetwork.org/news-events/archive.html/article/2023/10/23/lost-and-found-heritage-an-international-adoptee-journey * Adoption Network Cleveland, Monday Evening Speaker Series + Upcoming events: https://www.adoptionnetwork.org/service-areas/education-community-outreach/monday-evening-speaker-series.html + Already recorded: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NaAlnb4HYmk&list=PLa6sJ00g72ZqGHhu3pmWBqp_kNgpf3i2c * Crying in H Mart: A Memoir by Michelle Zauner

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Reshma McClintock, the producer and subject of the film Calcutta is My Mother is back with us today. Reshma is a transracial adoptee from Calcutta, India, and this incredible film documents her return to Calcutta for the first time since her adoption, and she would tell you that it also depicts a portion of her journey “out of the fog”. We talk about some of her experiences in Calcutta, and Reshma shares some tips for transnational adoptees about preparing for a home country visit. We also get to talk about her upcoming documentary screening in Minneapolis, Minnesota on May 4, 2024. Haley gets the honour of hosting the Q&A for that event, so consider this our personal invitation to you to come and join us to see the film and hang out with some fellow adoptees!

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Join us in Minneapolis on May 4, 2024, more details and upcoming screenings/streaming info here: https://calcuttafilm.com/ * Reshma’s first appearance on Adoptees On, episode 100 https://www.adopteeson.com/listen/100 * Adoptee Therapist Directory (created by Dr. Chaitra Wirta-Leiker): https://growbeyondwords.com/adoptee-therapist-directory/

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is fellow Canadian, award-winning director and filmmaker, Adrian Wills. Adrian has a brand new documentary out called A Quiet Girl where get to follow his journey of a public search for his birth mother, and experience every new discovery along with him. Today we talk with Adrian about how his friends prompted his search and what he’s discovered about the people of Newfoundland through his time there. We also discuss how we often create these mythical personas of our biological parents from a few short sentences in our non-identifying adoption information.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources A Quiet Girl: https://www.nfb.ca/film/a-quiet-girl/ + As soon as international streaming is available, we will update that information and link to the streaming services here.* * Sing Me a Lullaby by Tiffany Hsiung: https://www.cbc.ca/shortdocs/shorts/sing-me-a-lullaby * Family Wanted: Writers' Adoption Stories (2005) Edited by Sara Holloway

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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You’re in for a treat today, we have award-winning poet John Gallaher with us! John’s newest poetry collection, My Life in Brutalist Architecture releases this month and it’s his first collection focused in on his experience as an adopted person. Even though he was a kinship adoptee, he still had to take a DNA test to find the family he was searching for. We talk about DNA, nature versus nurture, his search for the other John Gallahers of the world and what reunion really looks like for him right now.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* My Life in Brutalist Architecture by John Gallaher, Ph.D. * Erin Belieu Poet * In the Language of My Captor by Shane McCrae

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is Sanjay Pulver, an Indian adoptee who has become an outspoken adoptee advocate in recent years. We talk about the complexities of being adopted from an orphanage in a country that is not currently safe for him to return to as a queer trans man. We discuss the intersections between being transnationally and transracially adopted with being a trans person and Sanjay also shares about his experience with somatic therapy.

Show NotesFull episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Torn Apart - a podcast by Dorothy Roberts * Check Sanjay out on these panels: + Adoption Mosaic We the Experts: Twins (December 2023) and Transgender and Nonbinary Adoptees (May 2022) + Adoptees United - Rainbow Adoptees: The Intersection of Queerness and Adoption * Sandra Steingraber, Ph.D. - episode 240 of Adoptees On * Rescripting the Narrative - a podcast by Lina Vanegas, MSW and Sol Yaku * Adult Adoptee Movement - “a group of UK adoptees, challenging attitudes to historic adoptions, striving to change the narrative on adoption.”

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is Dr. Sara Docan-Morgan, professor of communication studies and author of the book “In Reunion: Transnational Korean Adoptees and the Communication of Family”. Sara shares some of her personal story, and then we dig into her qualitative research from multiple Korean adoptees who have been in a relationship with their biological family for over a decade. There’s a treasure trove of reunion wisdom in this episode, including a new term that so perfectly encapsulates the weight adoptees carry through the search and reunion experience.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* In Reunion: Transnational Korean Adoptees and the Communication of Family by Sara Docan-Morgan, Ph.D. * Resilience (2009) Documentary by Tammy Chu * All You Can Ever Know by Nicole Chung

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is Julian Washio-Collette, a writer and monastic spiritual seeker, whose story includes the rarity of being relinquished and adopted twice. Julian shares what he hears when someone says the term “forever family”, how building community was difficult here when seemingly no one else has had the same experience of being a double-adoptee, and we ponder what the spiritual implications of adoption may mean.

Show NotesFull episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Peregrine Adoptee: Wandering Reflections on a Life in Fragments * https://peregrineadoptee.wordpress.com/2023/10/17/a-mere-infant-thoughts-for-a-new-adoptive-parent/ * The Journey from Abandonment to Healing: Surviving Through and Recovering from the Five Stages that Accompany the Loss of Love by Susan Anderson

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are so excited to welcome professor and sociologist Dr. SunAh Laybourn today! Sunah’s brand new book is called Out of Place: The Lives of Korean Adoptee Immigrants and it is definitely one you’re going to want to add into your collection. Today we talk about SunAh’s research, the realization that heritage culture camps are prioritizing adoptive parents’ comfort, and the public’s perception of the still dire issue of adoptee citizenship. Haley finally gets to ask the question she’s wondered about for at least five years: is being an adopted person a distinct culture of its own?

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Out of Place: The Lives of Korean Adoptee Immigrants by SunAh M. Laybourn, Ph.D. * Patrick Armstrong (Conversation Piece) https://www.conversationpiecepod.com/

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is award-winning poet, James Cagney. Author of Black Steel Magnolias in the Hour of Chaos Theory and Martian: The Saint of Loneliness, James is known for his absolutely dynamic live poetry readings, and we are honoured with a reading in this very episode! We discuss how James came to find out he was adopted, and as usual we’ve got questions about why parents keep these things a secret.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources Black Steel Magnolias in the Hour of Chaos Theory by James Cagney (What’s in a name? Hear more from James about why this* title!) * Martian: The Saint of Loneliness by James Cagney * Pact: An Adoption Alliance “We serve adopted children of color and their families” - https://pactadopt.org/

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s episode is our last one before our holiday break. We’ll be back with brand-new weekly episodes on January 12, 2024. We wanted to bring you a Healing Series episode to make sure we all had a little extra support before the holiday rush takes over. This year we started a brand new event called Ask an Adoptee therapist, and it has been an absolutely amazing resource for the community. Today’s episode is a compilation of some of the helpful conversations we’ve had together this fall with Marta Isabella Sierra, LMHC.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Holiday-themed episodes with Lesli A. Johnson, MFT 14, 126, 166 * Join us for our next Ask an Adoptee Therapist, check our live events calendar here: https://www.adopteeson.com/calendar

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Sara Easterly is back with us, she’s the author of Searching for Mom and the founder of Adoptee Voices. Today we’re talking about how Sara became friends with an adoptive mother and a birth mother in order to write a book called Adoption Unfiltered. It’s a hard conversation because when Haley got asked to endorse this book she had to say no, to a friend, who we value and deeply appreciate for her contributions to the adoptee community. So we got together to talk about it. We address the power dynamics when interacting with adoptive parents, we talk about whether or not adoption really is always going to be around, and what adoptive parents need to be doing now that they know they participated in a terrible system.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources Searching for Mom: A Memoir by Sara Easterly * Adoption Unfiltered by Sara Easterly (an adoptee), Kelsey Vander Vliet Ranyard (a birth mom), and Lori Holden (an adoptive mom) * Check out this episode of Adoption Unfiltered - Adoption Constellation Round Table: "What is hard about adoption?"* https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uObcPpsdJp8&t=1420s * Sara’s previous Adoptees On appearances episodes 143, 197, and 227 * Adoptee Voices E-Zine * Out of the Fog and into Consciousness: A Model of Adoptee Awareness by Susan F. Branco, JaeRan Kim, Grace Newton, Stephanie Kripa Cooper-Lewter, and Paula O’Loughlin - download in full here: https://harlows-monkey.com/2022/06/23/coming-to-consciousness/ and episode 235 JaeRan Kim, Ph.D. shares more about the model.

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we welcome back Dr. Liz DeBetta, author of Adult Adoptees and Writing to Heal: Migrating Toward Wholeness. Liz shares some reunion updates with us, including some very sad news about her sister. We discuss what lead her to choose to remain childfree. And of course, we talk about how writing, re-writing and examining the stories that have been placed upon us can help reconnect us to ourselves.

Today’s episode has mentions of sudden death, abuse and abortion.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Coupon code for December 2023: 72325 for 25% off * Liz’s newsletter sign up: https://forms.gle/t5cK3FSsMvcSJDor8 * Operation Fog Lift in NYC: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/fog-lift-nyc-edition-reckoning-with-the-primal-wound-tickets-726990547297

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are so excited to host critical adoption studies scholar, Dr. Kimberly McKee. She’s the author of the impactful book Disrupting Kinship, and her brand new release is Adoption Fantasies: The Fetishization of Asian Adoptees from Girlhood to Womanhood. We talk about Kim’s reunion with her family in Korea, where she’s currently living with her young son, and what it’s like parenting through reunification and reculturation. We talk about adoption in pop culture, and how preserving adoptee history and acknowledging the work of those who’ve come before us is vital to community building.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Adoption Fantasies: The Fetishization of Asian Adoptees from Girlhood to Womanhood by Kimberly McKee, PhD * In Reunion: Transnational Korean Adoptees and the Communication of Family by Sara Docan-Morgan

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today our guest is poet Jessica Hairston, author of Power of Our Wombs. Jessica shares her complex origin story, where both of her biological parents were struggling with addiction when she was born, apprehended and adopted soon after. We talk about “the traveling trauma” that has impacted her family system and the power of the word womb which features prominently in her poetry collection.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Power of Our Wombs by Jessica Hairston * BIPOC Adoptees, and their fundraising campaign here

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is the indomitable Susan Kiyo Ito. She has been writing, advocating, and leading in the adoptee community for decades and we are all the richer for it. Susan’s brand new memoir, I Would Meet You Anywhere, has just been released and it is fantastic. We talk about how Susan first discovered an adoptee memoir at her local library at age 13, and how that changed the course of her life. We’ve got adoptee activism history, relatable reunion problems, and the power of sharing our adoptee experiences in community all throughout this conversation.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* I Would Meet You Anywhere by Susan Kiyo Ito * You Should be Grateful by Angela Tucker * Adoptee Mentoring Society

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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You might know today’s guests and recognize their voices from their podcast, Adoption: The Making of Me. Louise Browne and Sarah Reinhardt are here! Today we hear about how their friendship started, they dish about some of the fights they’ve had and how they’ve sustained their close friendship. We also talk about all the books they’ve read in community with their audience, and which ones have been most impactful on their understanding of the impact of adoption.

*TW: We mention death by suicide in this episode so please take care when listening.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Adoption: The Making of Me https://www.adoptionthemakingofme.com/ * Books that Adoption: The Making of Me has covered on their show to date:

+ The Primal Wound by Nancy Verrier
+ Journey of the Adopted Self by Betty Jean Lifton
+ You Don’t Look Adopted by Anne Heffron
+ The Mistress’s Daughter by A.M. Homes
+ The Guild of the Infant Saviour: An Adopted Child’s Memory Book by Megan Culhane Galbraith
+ Who Am I Really: An Adoptee Memoir by Damon Davis
+ American Baby by Gabrielle Glaser
+ The Baby Thief by Barbara Raymond

Fireside Adoptees - https://www.youtube.com/@firesideadoptees673/featured
Joe Soll - https://adoptionhealing.com/psychoth.shtml
Adoptees Connect - https://adopteesconnect.com/

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Adoptee Remembrance Day was first commemorated on October 30, 2020. We’ve done a variety of episodes over the last few years beginning in 2020 with an interview with the founder of Adoptee Remembrance Day, Pamela Karanova. We’ve had listeners submit recordings of their thoughts, their poetry and prose. In deciding what to do this year, we were considering what would be most impactful for our community and we chose to do a healing series episode about suicide. This is the thing that we whisper about, we hide, we allude to, we are ashamed of, and we’re getting braver about discussing. We’ve invited Lina Vanegas, MSW, to talk to us about suicide.

Because of the topic we want to let you know exactly where we’re going in this episode. We talk about the research on adoptees and suicide, stigma surrounding death by suicide and appropriate language to use, finding supports as someone who has suicidal ideation and what to be cautious of, support for survivors of suicide attempts and suicide loss, and how to best support fellow adoptees who reach out to us when they are feeling suicidal.

TW: We will be mentioning suicidal ideation, suicide attempts, and death by suicide at multiple points during this episode so please take care in deciding whether or not to listen.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Mentions* Past Adoptees On Adoptee Remembrance Day episodes: 159, 160, 194, 227 * Your Consent Is Not Required: The Rise in Psychiatric Detentions, Forced Treatment, and Abusive Guardianships by Rob Wipond * https://publications.aap.org/pediatrics/article-abstract/108/2/e30/63668/Adoption-as-a-Risk-Factor-for-Attempted-Suicide?redirectedFrom=fulltext?autologincheck=redirected * https://publications.aap.org/pediatrics/article-abstract/132/4/639/64833/Risk-of-Suicide-Attempt-in-Adopted-and-Nonadopted?redirectedFrom=fulltext?autologincheck=redirected * Lina’s upcoming event: https://www.instagram.com/p/Cyg3UOfuYEA/ * Lina’s podcast: Rescripting the Narrative

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s episode is a celebration for When We Become Ours: A YA Adoptee Anthology which releases on October 24, 2023. The first of its kind, edited by Shannon Gibney and Nicole Chung, with fifteen adoptee authors is cause for celebration. We’re going to hear from an emerging author, Stefany Valentine, who shares her story of being adopted at age twelve, while her biological father had a terminal illness. She is the first step-parent adoptee we’ve had on the show. We talk about the lack of consent to her adoption, the cultural losses Stefany suffered, and how it wasn’t until her mid-twenties that she realized her biological mother had been removed from her birth certificate. Next we’re going to hear from five more contributing authors who share about their stories in the collection and what it’s meant for them to be a part of this project.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* When We Become Ours: A YA Adoptee Anthology Edited by Shannon Gibney and Nicole Chung (authors included in the collection: Shannon Gibney, Nicole Chung, Mariama J. Lockington, Meredith Ireland, Mark Oshiro, Stefany Valentine, Eric Smith, Kelley Baker, MeMe Collier, Susan Harness, Lisa Nopachai, Matthew Salesses, Sun Yung Shin, Lisa Wool-Rim Sjöblom, Jenny Heijun Wills) * Listen to their past Adoptees On episodes: + Shannon Gibney (179, 236) + Nicole Chung (84, 258) + Mariama J. Lockington (116) + Susan Devan Harness (192) + Matthew Salesses (152) + Lisa Wool-Rim Sjöblom (130) + Jenny Heijun Wills (133, 218) * TikTokkers mentioned: adoptee_thoughts, first.birth.mom, and eunaeemily

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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This is a special episode in our healing series where we talk to adoptees who are also therapists. We’re going to call this episode a sort of “tune-up” for anyone who is in a period of estrangement or separation from a close relationship, whether it's adoptive parents, bio parents, somebody close in your life. We’re talking through some of the things people don't talk about publicly and some things to consider that might be impacting your life and you just don't even realize it till you hear Marta say it out loud! It’s a through-provoking episode and we hope it’ll be helpful for you.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Marta’s previous appearances on Adoptees On: https://www.adopteeson.com/therapists/sierra * Adoption Mosaic We The Experts: Adoptees + Adoptive Family Estrangement

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is actor, director, playwright and podcaster, Lanise Antoine Shelley. Lanise shares about being adopted from a Haitian orphanage at age 4 by her single white adoptive mother and how exploring the impact of adoption over the last three years has challenged her connections with her adoptive family. Lanise also tells us about when she realized that her removal from Haiti left a huge hole for her entire biological family that was left behind, including her mother and father.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Podcast: When They Were Young: Amplifying Voices of Adoptees * Tony Nabor @RacialEquityInsights * Unraveling Adoption: How to Be an Anti-Racist in Adoptive Families

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are so thrilled to welcome Nicole Chung back to the podcast. Nicole’s new memoir, A Living Remedy, is a heartbreaking pilgrimage where we walk with her through her grief in losing both of her adoptive parents within a few short years of each other. We talk a lot about grieving today: depression, avoidance, grief rituals, how our loved ones can show up for us, the joy pets can bring us in the worst of times. As an adoptee, Nicole has been one of the stalwart leaders in our community and you’ll know why when you listen to the compassion and vulnerability she shares in our conversation.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources * A Living Remedy by Nicole Chung * When We Become Ours - A YA Adoptee Anthology

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are so excited to introduce you to Sarah Myer, author of the forthcoming graphic memoir, Monstrous. Today Sarah and I talk about their love of comics, anime, and cosplay and how it lead them to explore their own identity as a Korean adoptee and comic artist. We also talk about anger and violence and how it can be incredibly scary when it’s erupting out of ourselves.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources * Monstrous by Sarah Myer * Stephanie Drenka (episode 210) * Mentions: Sarah’s MFA thesis: https://library.scad.edu/record=b1547567

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are so thrilled to talk with actor, audiobook narrator, and adoptee advocate, Kira Omans today. Kira shares how looking deeply at adoption over the past decade has changed her perspective. We talk about what it’s like to audition as an adoptee and to embody a new character and identity during a performance. Of course, we get to chat about adoptee representation in Hollywood and the media, including how watching just one documentary upended what Kira thought was her origin story.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources * Return to Seoul - 2022 Film * One Child Nation - Documentary * Make sure you’re following Kira on Instagram * Mentions: Dear Adoption, I Climbed * Mentions: Criticism of Blue Bayou

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are thrilled to introduce you to Sarah Audsley today! Sarah’s debut poetry collection Landlock X is our June Adoptees On(ly) Book Club pick. Today Sarah shares about how a reunion with genetic family in Korea only opened up more questions for her. We talk about cultural differences, context that can be lost in translation, and how she may be an anomaly with accurate records from the adoption agency. We talk through several of Sarah’s poems and our excitement surrounding the growing body of adoptee literature.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources * Landlock X by Sarah Audsley * Join us for the Adoptees On(ly) Book Club on June 24, 2023 * Cleave by Tiana Nobile (Adoptees On episode 189) * Starlings Collective * Mentions: Erica Walker Jewelry * Mentions: Nancy Kim Artist

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we are talking with Dr. Chaitra Wirta-Leiker about adoptee superpowers. Don’t worry, we’re not going to express gratitude for a traumatic experience over here, it’s more about understanding what are some common traits we hold and how can we embrace and make use of them to our advantage. We talk about perfectionism, empathy, people-pleasing, control, attachment, independence and more. We know you’re going to find something you relate to in today’s episode!

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Marie Discovers Her Superpowers (Adoptees Like Me) by Dr. Chaitra Wirta-Leiker * Casey Conquers Bedtime (Adoptees Like Me) by Dr. Chaitra Wirta-Leiker * Mentions: Adoptees Like Me fundraiser * Mentions: US Adoptee Therapist Directory * Mentions: ICAV worldwide therapist list

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are thrilled to bring you two fellow podcasters today! Dr. Samantha Coleman and Sandria Washington are our guests from Black to the Beginning. They share their stories of being friends who just coincidentally found out a few years apart in adulthood that they also were both adopted. We talk about the lack of resources for same race black adoptees and how Dr. Sam and Sandria are working to build the community and supports they wish they had when they first found out they were adopted.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* The Black Adoption Podcast: Chana Timms Episode, Dr. Phoenix Episode, Chris LeMark Episode, Darius Colquitt Episode * DISC Assessment * Little White Lies Documentary

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is our friend, Anne Elise. Anne lives abroad and we talk about some of the intersections she sees between living as an American expat and being an adopted person. Anne shares what it’s like growing up with an adopted brother who was keen to live out the defiant “acting out” adoptee stereotype. We also talk about our love of reading adoptee-authored work and rejection from our birthmothers.

Show NotesFull episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Living in Adoption’s Emotional Aftermath by Larissa MacFarquhar * Podcast: Adoptees Crossing Lines * The Normal One: Life with a Difficult or Damaged Sibling by Jeanne Safer * Mentioned: Wake Up Little Susie: Single Pregnancy and Race Before Roe V. Wade by Rickie Solinger * Mentioned: American Bastard by Jan Beatty (Adoptees On episode: 204) * Mentioned: Killing Karoline by Sara-Jayne King (Adoptees On episode: 97)

Connect With Us* Anne Elise: Facebook * Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook * Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

The Normal One: Life with a Difficult or Damaged Sibling

Wake Up Little Susie: Single Pregnancy and Race Before Roe v. Wade

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Cam Lee Small, MS, LPCC joins us today. You may know him from his extremely popular Instagram account, @TherapyRedeemed. Cam shares how he went from aspiring rock band guitarist to a therapist who primarily works with adoptees, both children and adults, and their families. We talk about the complexities of supporting the needs of adopted children while keeping their adoptive parents engaged and willing to listen to adult adoptee voices.

Show NotesFull episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources This is Why I was Adopted workbook by Cam Lee Small, MS, LPCC * @TherapyRedeemed on Instagram * Grow Beyond Words Adoptee Therapist Directory by Dr. Chaitra Wirta-Leiker * Adoptees Like Me series by Dr. Chaitra Wirta-Leiker * Mentioned: Adoptee Consciousness Model * Mentioned: Cam’s interview on Adapted * Mentioned: ***Cam’s trip to China & Korea, some resources he’d like to share * Mentioned: Reconstruction of Adoption Issues: Delineation of Five Phases AmongAdult Adoptees by Judith Penny, L. DiAnne Borders, and Francie Portnoy * Mentioned: Dr. Hollee McGinnis - mapping the life course of adoptees (current study)

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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If you’ve been around the show for a while, you may remember that almost exactly one year ago Haley said goodbye to her dog, Lucy. We had so many people reach out during that time who had also lost a pet companion and so we started this conversation as a community about how especially weighty the grief can be for an adopted person.

Today’s guest is Laura Summers, LMFT, an adoptee and therapist, and we are talking how pet loss is a form of disenfranchised grief. Laura holds my hand through this challenging conversation about how dear our pets can be to us, and she teaches us how we can move through grief in a way that honours ourselves instead of trying to get to a finish line of feeling “fine”.

Show NotesFull episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* The Wild Edge of Sorrow: The Sacred Work of Grief by Francis Weller * Ambiguous Loss: Learning to Live with Unresolved Grief by Pauline Boss * Adopting Wellness podcast with Laura Summers, LMFT and Katie Gagel (and Instagram) * https://www.laurasummerslmft.com/

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

Ambiguous Loss: Learning to Live with Unresolved Grief

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Today’s guest is Angela Tucker, one of the most well-known adopted people in our community, subject of the documentary Closure, now turned author of You Should Be Grateful: Stories of Race, Identity, and Transracial Adoption. Angela shares about her time as a caseworker in private adoption, and about the difficulties of balancing the tightrope act of critiquing adoption and still being invited back into adoption spaces. We also chat about how the subject of adoption shows up in Hollywood storylines is slowly evolving.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Robert Ballard: Narrative Burden * "You Should Be Grateful" Stories of Race, Identity, and Transracial Adoption By Angela Tucker

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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If you are someone who is looking to have a relationship but have struggled to connect with past partners, or you are feeling misunderstood in your current relationship whenever you start talking about adoption, I think this conversation will be extremely helpful for you. Today we are joined by Amy Geller, LCSW, an adoptee and therapist, and her husband Jeff Nyhuis. Amy found herself repeating some self-sabotaging patterns in romantic relationships and when she met Jeff she was determined to correct course. We talk with Amy and Jeff about coming out of the fog together. They give us advice about how we can start these conversations with our partners, and how you might end up creating another adoptee ally in the process!

Show NotesFull episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* From the Adoptees On: Relationship series episodes 58: Haley & Nick, 66: Divorce, 70: When Two Adoptees Marry * A Home Within - “We provide open-ended, individual psychotherapy, free of charge, to current and former foster youth.” There are opportunities for therapists to volunteer their time here as well. * Growing Beyond Worlds Adoptee Therapist Directory * Mentioned: You Don’t Look Adopted by Anne Heffron * Mentioned: Amy’s presentation for Adoption Network Cleveland

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is Dr. Katie Bozek, a therapist and the Executive Director of KAAN, the Korean American Adoptee Adoptive Family Network. We talk about the complexity of what being asked for our story brings. Katie shares how the birth of her first child was what set her on the journey of looking closely of what being adopted truly meant to her, and we touch on ways we both parent as adoptees with a focus on building connection. We wrap up by talking about the upcoming KAAN conference and what an adoptee-led event with a focus on community building and well-being can look like.

Show NotesFull episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources KAAN Conference 2023 Info * @wearekaan on Instagram | Facebook.com/WeAreKAAN * Mentioned*: Disrupting Kinship: Transnational Politics of Korean Adoption in the United States by Dr. Kimberly D. McKee

Connect With Us* Katie Bozek, Ph.D., LMFT: Website * Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook * Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is author and accessibility consultant Dorothy Ellen Palmer. Dorothy is a fellow Canadian adoptee whose story has some remarkable coincidences. We talk about the indescribable lure back to the places of our biological ancestors, why mainstream adoption humour is so problematic, and ableism in the adoptee community.

This episode requires a trigger warning as we touch on some extremely difficult topics including mentions of sexual assault including infant sexual assault and other mentions of abuse.

Show NotesFull episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Falling For Myself * Crip Camp documentary * The Incredible Story of Finding my Brother in my Sixties

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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What can we say about today’s guest? She is an iconic songwriter, Grammy-nominated folk artist, and outspoken adoptee advocate, Mary Gauthier. Mary’s first book Saved By A Song: The Art and Healing Power of Songwriting is a nurturing exploration of how sharing our stories can be a healing experience. Her 2010 album The Foundling has become a soundtrack for many of us as we’ve grieved and process our own adoptee stories. Mary and Haley talk about her path to songwriting, how important adoptee community is to her, and the power of story to overcome trauma.

Listen to this episode on your favourite podcast app:

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Journey Of the Adopted Self: A Quest For Wholeness by Betty Jean Lifton * Saved By a Song: The Art and Healing Power of Songwriting by Mary Gauthier * marygauthier.com/tour * The Foundling (2010)

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are back with part two of our interview with Dr. Deanna Shrodes. Last week Deanna shared with us how her father Gus Nicholas was found in May 2022 at the age of 92 after a first cousin DNA match. Deanna was his only daughter and they had several precious months together in reunion before he passed away in December 2022. Their story is so unbelievable that it’s been featured on CBS Mornings and has gone viral around the world. Today we talk more about grief, the adoptee community, and how Deanna is handling some hard news that some of her maternal family members were keeping secrets from her and Gus for decades.

Show NotesFull episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Perpetual Child: Adult Adoptee Anthology: Dismantling the Stereotype

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Our guest is Dr. Deanna Shrodes, a minister and well-known writer of the Adoptee Restoration blog and multiple books. Back in 2019 Deanna and I discussed the challenges of searching for her father and coming up with false leads and dead ends for years. Well today, she is back to share her heartwarming and heartbreaking story of finding her father Gus Nicholas after a lengthy search. It is so unbelievable that it has gone viral with millions watching her story on CBS Mornings. We talk about the joy and grief and messiness of all of it. This is part one, next week we’ll finish the story and share our recommended resources with you.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* DrDeannaShrodes.com * Deanna and Gus’ segment on CBS Mornings

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we are talking about something that may feel triggering to many of us. Indeed, both me and my guest had a hard time at different points during this conversation. We are talking with an adoptee who is also an adoptive parent. Andie Coston, LCSWA, is here, and we’re talking about how to live in the grey world of both advocating for adoption abolition and/or reform, and also the fact that there are children that need permanence now. How do we look at the systemic upstream problems that cause adoption to exist, and how do we support the most vulnerable in a timely fashion? There are very challenging parts to being an adopted person who also adopts, and there are moments where an adopted person is the only other person who could understand what their adoptee is going through.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Andie.Ink on Instagram * Trauma Informed Everything podcast with Andie * PostResource.com

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is Kirsta Bowman, also known as Karpoozy to much of the internet. Kirsta is an adoptee advocate who has alerted millions of TikTok viewers about unethical adoption rehoming practices. She shares some of her personal search reunion story with us today, and we chat about the complexities of reunion when your biological family lives on another continent. And of course we revisit the topic of grief when you’re rejected from being reunited and when you find a grave.

Show NotesFull episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Kirsta’s TikTok Account @karpoozy (Backup Account Karpoozy2) * Adoption Advocacy Podcast - January 2021 “Kirsta Bowman: adoption agencies and ethics” * Reuters investigation “The Child Exchange” from 2013 https://www.reuters.com/investigates/adoption/#article/part1 * Mentions: How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber & Elaine Mazlich, Imani Barbarin @Crutches&Spice, Dylan Mulvaney @dylanmulvaney

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is Dr. Sandra Steingraber, a public health biologist and climate crisis expert. Sandra shares some of her personal story with us, and then the importance of knowing the interactions of both our biology and our adoptive environments on our health. As a gay woman who came out later in life, Sandra now helps facilitate a Queer Adoptee support group and we talk about the intersections and conflicts she sees between the LGBTQ community and the adoptee rights community. We’ve talked before about the upstream issues causing adoption to continue, but have you ever thought of how the climate crisis may be impacting family separation? Dr. Steingraber will explain!

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Always Knew I Was Adopted; Just Found Out I’m Gay By Sandra Steingraber * Books by Dr. Steingraber: + Post-Diagnosis + Living Downstream: An Ecologist Looks at Cancer and the Environment + Having Faith: An Ecologist's Journey to Motherhood + The Falling Age of Puberty in U.S. Girls: What We Know, what We Need to Know + Raising Elijah: Protecting Our Children in an Age of Environmental Crisis * Living Downstream - documentary and Unfractured - documentary * AdopteeReading.com * Growing in the Dark by Janine M. Baer

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We’re inviting you to join our Adoptees On(ly) Book Club discussion today! Sullivan Summer interviews Rebecca Carroll, author of Surviving the White Gaze, at a live Zoom event with fellow adoptees. This was recorded in October of 2022. Like Rebecca, Sullivan is a Black, domestic, transracial adoptee raised in New Hampshire. She is a regular contributor to Adoptees Off Script.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Surviving the White Gaze by Rebecca Carroll * Join our Adoptees On(ly) Book Club * Come Through Podcast with Rebecca Carroll

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Lora K. Joy returns to the podcast today to share about the process of legally changing her name and being adopted back by her biological mother. We talk about all the healing work and therapy she's persisted in to find acceptance of herself and about how it feels to own the truth around her story.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Self Attunement: An Adoptee Superpower * Goodbye Hypervigilance: Healing Adoptee Worry * NoBODY Looks Like Me: An Adoptee Experience * The Flourish Experience

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Marta Isabella Sierra, LMHC returns to discuss a model of attachment that is so helpful for adopted people to consider. Instead of attachment styles being seen as a spectrum, Marta teaches us about the Nested Model and understanding the layers of complexity that can add to adoptees’ experience of attachment. We even do a role play of how to have some challenging conversations if you’re struggling in any relationship.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Polysecure by Jessica Fern * Attached by Dr. Amir Levine and Rachel S.F. Heller * Marta’s previous appearances on Adoptees On: 232 [Healing Series] Identity with Marta Isabella Sierra, LMHC71 [Healing Series] Romantic Relationships with Marta Isabella Sierra, LMHC

Connect With Us* Marta Isabella Sierra, LMHC: • martasierralmhc [at] gmail [dot] com * Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook * Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Shannon Gibney, an award-winning author of multiple books, and her brand new release, The Girl I Am, Was, & Never Will Be: A Speculative Memoir of Transracial Adoption, returns to the podcast! Today Shannon shares some of her reunion story with us, how her long-time friends supported her through some pivotal life events, and how her relationship with her adoptive family has evolved over the years. We talk about the brand new book, and patrons will get the opportunity to join Shannon for an Adoptees On(ly) book club event in February 2023 (adopteeson.com/bookclub).

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* The Girl I Am, Was, & Never Will Be: A Speculative Memoir of Transracial Adoption by Shannon Gibney * Check out Shannon’s other Adoptees On episode (#179) * Upcoming events with Shannon for her book launch * The Alliance for the Study of Adoption and Culture - journal available online

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Happy 2023! What a way for us to begin the new year! One of the people we most highly esteem in the adoptee community is here, JaeRan Kim Ph.D.. JaeRan is an adoptee scholar, community leader, and author of the prolific blog, Harlow’s Monkey. Today she shares some of her personal story and how she landed in critical adoption studies. She also teaches us about the brilliant new model she’s developed with several adoptee scholars to help us move beyond “out of the fog” language and instead come into Adoptee Consciousness.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript here.

Recommended Resources* Harlow’s Monkey * Out of the Fog and into Consciousness: A Model of Adoptee Awareness by Susan F. Branco, JaeRan Kim, Grace Newton, Stephanie Kripa Cooper-Lewter, and PaulaO’Loughlin - download in full here: https://harlows-monkey.com/2022/06/23/coming-to-consciousness/ * Adoption History Project: https://pages.uoregon.edu/adoption/and the creator, Ellen Herman's book, Kinship by Design: A History of Adoption in the Modern United States

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Abby Hasberry, LMFT-A join us to talk about the importance of adult adoptees developing a positive racial identity. We can’t develop that as children (nor as adults) when racial mirrors and cultural experiences are nonexistent. Abby shares some tools and strategies we can use to do this work of racial reclamation, and she addresses a common fear and question, “but is this cultural appropriation?”.

Show Notes

Full episode transcript available here

Recommended Resources* The Adoption File Podcast Interview with Abby Hasberry * Self-Acceptance in Black and White | Education Sciences * Adopting Privilege (Coming Soon!) * Becoming Black: A Reflection on Transracial Adoption & Identity Development

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are so excited to welcome Patrick Armstrong to the podcast! Patrick is a fellow adoptee community builder and today he shares his experiences growing up as a Korean adoptee in all-white spaces. He’s moved from rejecting his Asian identity, to a period of reclamation of identity, language and culture, and now feels that he’s in a place of fully accepting himself. We hope this conversation will be encouraging, especially to those of you who have struggled to affirm your own unique identity in the world.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources* The Janchi Show * Therapy Redeemed * Conversation Piece Podcast

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Marta Sierra, LMHC talks with us about identity development as adult adoptees. We talk through some of the ways adoption trauma can mean delayed development, and that finding out who we really are is possible in adulthood. Marta also advises us that sometimes doing healing work and discovering our preferences and values can upend our lives.

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Thank you to each one of you who has listened to an episode of Adoptees On! Each adoptee who listens is an integral part of our community, and we are feeling especially grateful for you making this possible today.

Haley Radke and Carrie Cahill Mulligan are celebrating 1,000,000 downloads of the Adoptees On podcast! Join us as we take a look back at our first episode together and talk through some of our changes of perspective over the last six and a half years. We also answer some of your questions.

We hope we have consistently shown you that adoptee voices are number one here! It is a true honour that we get to share your stories and wisdom with the world. If you’d like the show to keep thriving, please consider joining our Patreon (https://www.patreon.com/adopteeson) or giving a one-time donation (https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=HU8AYRHKXSJSE).

Show Notes

Recommended Resources* Join our Adoptees On community * Listen to Carrie’s first episode or Haley’s story on episode 13 * Check out the Adoptees On(ly) Book Club

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we are excited to welcome Dr. Marcy Axness. This episode is a mix of a history lesson about adoptee activism and the psychological impacts of infant and mother separation. Marcy has her Ph.D. in Early Human Development, and brings a unique expertise and lens to the adopted person’s experience. We discuss what it’s like if we bring consciousness to our experiences and how we can be always moving towards healing but also that, unfortunately, there will likely always be opportunities for more healing.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources* MarcyAxness.com for her adoption articles * Warming the Stone Child: Myths and Stories about Abandonment and the Unmothered Child by Clarissa Pinkola Estés Ph.D. * We mention this article: “In Appreciation of the Primal Wound” by Marcy Axness, Ph.D.

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Tiffany shares her story of growing up in an open adoption, and how it isn’t the panacea that many hold it up to be.

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We have to admit this is the first featured guest we’ve had on the show who is not adopted. We are excited to introduce you to Grace Kelly, who has successfully had her adoption reversed in Australia and now works to help other Australians annul their adoptions. We discuss the impact having her adoption reversed has had on her personal healing journey and Grace also shares about the importance of our language, including why she doesn’t use the term adoptee.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources* Australian Adoptee Podcast: Adopted Feels * Australian Podcast: Adopt Perspectives by Jigsaw Queensland (episode on adoption reversal - Michael, Discharging an Adoption ) * Grace’s organization, Cribmates Adoption Reversal: https://www.facebook.com/adoption.reversal * Transcript of the Australian Forced Adoption Apology and video * Australian legislation on adoption reversal is state by state at the time of this episode’s release, you can search by your specific state, here is one example: Victoria

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Adoptee Remembrance Day is commemorated annually on October 30th. It is a day to remember our adoptee friends who have died by suicide. On this day we also acknowledge the adopted people who are without citizenship in the very country they were taken to as infants or children. We think of those who have suffered abuse at the hands of their adoptive parents and grieve those who have been murdered by the people who promised to give them a safe home. We mourn with those of us who have buried pain through addictions and lost time through incarceration. On Adoptee Remembrance Day we validate the experiences of those who have had adoption disruptions and multiple placements. Today we recognize the disconnection and loss of all who identify as being separated from our families of origin, by no choice of our own.

This is the third annual Adoptee Remembrance Day and in previous years we have asked listeners to submit recordings of what the day meant to them. This year we recorded a live event with the Adoptee Voices writing groups and ten adoptee writers who are sharing a collection of their poetry and prose with us today. It was powerful and moving and deeply beautiful and filled with sorrow.

*Content warning: this episode contains mentions of suicide, self-harm, and other challenging topics

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Adoptee Voices https://adoptee-voices.com/ * Adoptee Voices E-Zine: https://adoptee-voices.com/ezine/ * Adoptee Remembrance Day: https://adopteeremembranceday.com/ * Register for Upcoming Writing Groups (starting November 1, 2022) * Previous Adoptees On - Adoptee Remembrance Day episodes: 160 and 194

Today’s Writers * Maya Holmes - A Day for the Forgotten and Broken-Hearted - Instagram * Christine Koubek Flynn - On Remembering Adoption -Twitter | Website * Marci Purcell - We Remember in our Bones -Twitter * Rebecca Cheek - Individually, Collectively * Roberta Holland - Happy Birthday * Rebecca Cheek - Individually, Collectively * Roberta Holland - Happy Birthday * Adam Anthony - How do I really feel about all this? - Instagram - Website * Tina - Breathing Blue - Podcast Episode * Cynthia Landesberg - The Day They Say I Was Born -Website * Sandi Smith - Earthquake * Chae Ryan - [Untitled] - chae.ryan[at]icloud[dot]com

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we are so honoured to introduce you to Harrison Mooney, author of the incredible new memoir, Invisible Boy, where he exposes the trauma of transracial adoption. Harrison shares with us why family preservation is so important to him, and how he was able to reconnect with his biological mother after a lengthy time of silence between them. We talk about the complexities of being in a situation where it didn’t feel safe to say the whole truth about adoption, and about how good it feels when you’re finally able to speak freely.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Invisible Boy by Harrison Mooney * Older Sister. Not Necessarily Related.: A Memoir by Jenny Heijun Wills * Book Club recording with Jenny Heijun Wills on Patreon * Jenny’s appearances on Adoptees On: episode 133 and episode 218 * Check out Harrison’s talk with Jenny Heijun Wills and Wayde Compton: Transracial Adoption Is It any Good?

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we are joined by Ethan Ferkiss to share his heartwarming reunion story. Expecting rejection or indifference, Ethan wasn’t prepared for his search to end in what he calls the “jackpot scenario: a full-scale welcome”. But as you can guess, navigating new relationships with four adult siblings, his biological mother, and his biological father, has been a whirlwind and can be overwhelming at times.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Trusting your own inner voice * The Wet Hex by Sun Yung Shin * Truth and Agency: Writing Ideas For People Who Were Adopted by Anne Heffron

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Janet Nordine, MS, LMFT, RPT-S is back to talk about adoptee self-worth. So many of us tell ourselves the story over and over of, “there must be something wrong with me because I wasn’t worth keeping”. Janet talks us through a new phrase we can say to ourselves, “I will not abandon myself when I need myself the most.” This episode is for you if you’ve ever felt like you weren’t enough. Let’s show up for ourselves, sometimes that’s all we’ve got!

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Telling ourselves, “I will not abandon myself when I need myself most” * Telling ourselves, “I’m not bad, and I haven’t done anything wrong” * Dr. Gabor Maté video Janet referenced available here * SNL - Lizzo’s appearance “Special” * Check out The Center For Connection in Las Vegas, Nevada

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are honoured to introduce you to Tony Corsentino today! As a philosophy professor turned public librarian, Tony walks us through some of the best strategies he’s used to challenge the traditional adoption narrative. He also teaches us the differences between privacy and secrecy and he shares the importance of adoptees listening to the stories of others who have experienced severance from their family of origin.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Tony’s Substack - “This is Not a Legal Record” * Fourteen Propositions About Adoption by Tony Corsentino * Laura Briggs’ work * Somebody’s Children by Laura Briggs * Taking Children: A History of American Terror by Laura Briggs * Other books we mention: Invisible Boy by Harrison Mooney, All You Can Ever Know by Nicole Chung, The Girls Who Went Away by Ann Fessler

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Kara Bos is one of the first adoptees to ever successfully win a paternity lawsuit in South Korea. Kara’s biological father was compelled by the courts to take a DNA test confirming his genetic connection to Kara which in turn allowed her to be added to the family registry as his daughter. We talk about the difficulties of disenfranchised grief she experienced when he died only six months after her court victory. Kara also shares about how there is room for us to be thankful for our current lives and also freedom to search for our origins and grieve the past.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Danish Korean Rights Group * News article “Call for South Korea to investigate child adoptions to Denmark” * Adapted Podcast * Adapted Podcast - Kara’s episode

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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In the final episode before our summer break, guest host Lisette Austin interviews Haley Radke! We are talking all about DNA testing: what made Haley finally take the plunge, which companies she chose to use, and about all the surprise feelings that came up. Haley also did this weird podcaster thing where she recorded her inner thoughts while spitting in the tubes… so we may have a few clips from that throughout the episode.

We’ll see you back here in September, make sure you’re following or subscribed to Adoptees On so we can connect with you again in the fall with brand new episodes!

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Cut Off Genes Podcast: https://cutoffgenes.libsyn.com * Search Maven E165 of Adoptees On: https://www.adopteeson.com/listen/165 * The Globetrotter Lounge Podcast: Ep 61 | Mickela Mallozzi: Dance & DNA Travel * My American Meltingpot Podcast: Ep 34 | DNA travel, adoption & multiracial identity * Mentioned: episodes about Haley’s story: Episode 13 * Mentioned: The Lost Family: How DNA Testing Is Upending Who We Are by Libby Copeland

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today guest host Lisette Austin speaks with Christina Romo, creator of the blog called Diary of a Not-So-Angry Asian Adoptee. Christina shares about her career path in the adoption world and how she has finally found a position that she feels aligns with her personal work in adoptee advocacy. Lisette and Christina discuss the complexities that come with being close with adoptive parents and family while coming to grips with the trauma and loss that is part of adoption. Christina stresses the importance of remaining true to yourself while navigating the healing process.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Diary of a Not-So-Angry Asian Adoptee: diaryofanotsoangryasianadoptee.com * Harlow’s Monkey: An Unapologetic Look at Transracial and Transnational Adoption by Dr. JaeRan Kim

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we are talking about The Flourish Experience. You’re going to hear from multiple people who participated in a year-long group focused in on adoptee community through writing and sharing together weekly.

I hope what you hear is that connecting deeply with other adopted people is possible. So many of them share that by being vulnerable they’ve been able to be truly seen by their peers, and for some that’s brought a measure of healing. There have been many different lessons learned through their year together, and I am honoured to get to share some of those with you today. For the majority of the show you’re going to hear from Catie Samantha Peck, LMSW, and Michelle Hinton, with multiple other authors chiming in with their thoughts throughout. The members of the 2021 Flourish group hope this book will guide and inspire you to find your own Flourish Family.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * The Flourish Experience: www.theflourishexperience.com * Art auction to support Saving Our Sisters (savingoursistersadoption.org)

Connect With Us * The Flourish Experience: www.theflourishexperience.com * Catie Samantha Peck, LMSW: Instagram | www.truestorycounselingservices.com * Michelle Hinton: Instagram * Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook * Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are honoured to have the brilliant Dr. Jenny Heijun Wills return to Adoptees On today. We talk about what reunion has looked like in the time since she’s published her award-winning memoir, Older Sister. Not Necessarily Related., including the practical “how-tos” of maintaining a relationship with a family member that lives abroad and speaks a different language. Jenny also addresses what it feels like to be raised with Eurocentric beauty standards as a person of colour.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Mentioned: https://this.org/2020/09/21/a-certain-swanness/ * Older Sister. Not Necessarily Related.: A Memoir by Jenny Heijun Wills * Adoption and Multiculturalism: Europe, the Americas, and the Pacific Editors: Jenny Heijun Wills, Tobias Hübinette, and Indigo Willing * Probably Ruby by Lisa Bird-Wilson * The Jade Peony by Wayson Choy * All That Matters by Wayson Choy

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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I am thrilled to introduce you to today’s guest, Lisa Bird-Wilson, the author of the phenomenal novel, Probably Ruby. We talk about what it means to be Indigenous and adopted into a white family and how she has now spent decades exploring her Metis identity. Lisa shares some behind-the-scenes info about the process of writing Probably Ruby, why she’s currently writing a memoir, and the importance of having that history preserved for her children.

During this interview there were some challenges with sound, and unfortunately, I was distracted by my ailing dog and didn’t do my best work. I apologize to Lisa that I didn’t catch some poor audio quality moments that I normally would have caught during recording.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Probably Ruby by Lisa Bird-Wilson * Just Pretending by Lisa Bird-Wilson * The Red Files by Lisa Bird-Wilson * The Sixties Scoop Foundation: www.nationalhealingfoundation.com

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today guest host Lisette Austin speaks with Annalisa Toccara, the co-founder of the UK organization, Adoptee Futures. Annalisa shares about the complexities of her relationship with her adoptive family, and her experience coming “out of the fog.” Lisette and Annalisa also discuss grief and loss, they’ve both lost an adoptive parent within the last year or two. Annalisa talks about the loss of her adoptive mother in 2021, what the grieving process has been like, and the profound gifts at the core of the journey.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Healing After Loss by Martha Hickman * The Joy of Being Selfish: Why you need boundaries and how to set them by Michelle Elman

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is the exceptional poet Lee Herrick. If you haven’t read any of Lee’s work, today is the day to make a purchase at your favourite bookstore! Lee is a Korean adoptee and shares how he found out later in life he was born in a completely different city than he was told. We discuss poetry as a social critique, surviving feelings of deep despair, and how writing poetry and finding the adoptee community has been such a gift.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Scar and Flower by Lee Herrick * Gardening Secrets of the Dead by Lee Herrick * This Many Miles from Desire by Lee Herrick * First Person Plural (documentary by Deann Borshay Liem) - www.newday.com/film/first-person-plural

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We are thrilled to talk with Sunny Reed while she’s right in the midst of her Ph.D. program developing a new transformational framework for transnational adoption. We believe her focus on connecting critical adoption research studies with existing child-focused and child-centering scholars is going to be revolutionary over the next decade. Haley and Sunny discuss some of what that means, as Sunny gives us a preview of her framework, but we also get personal talking about some health challenges she’s had and the pain of working in advocacy when it all comes back to our personal experiences with loss.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Journal article “Their reward will be a lovely daughter": The Mobilization of "Hard to Adopt" and the Portrayal of Adoption as a Gift. Adoption & Culture. 8. 227-244. Hepburn, Taryn & Bendo, Daniella & Spencer, Dale & Sinclair, Raven & Bennett, Jacob. (2020) * Childhood in a Global Perspective by Karen Wells

Connect With Us * Sunny Reed: sunnyjreed.blog * Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook * Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Guest host Lisette Austin speaks with Kendra Mylnechuk Potter, actor, yoga teacher, Native adoptee, and subject of the documentary, Daughter of Lost Bird. Kendra shares her powerful adoption and reunion story, about navigating identity issues while claiming her cultural heritage, and what it was like to reunite with her biological mother, family, and community as part of filming a documentary. Kendra also talks about the painful and abusive U.S. policies around Native children and adoption, how she practices self-care while integrating the reality of generational and historical trauma into her personal story, and much more.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Daughter of a Lost Bird - Documentary - www.daughterofalostbird.com * Dawnland - Documentary - upstanderproject.org/dawnland * Blood Memory - Documentary - https://www.bloodmemorydoc.com * I Can Make This Promise by Christine Day * The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk * Try out an embodiment practice for healing work

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today the author of our April Adoptees On(ly) book club pick, Bastards is with us! Mary Anna King was one of our very first podcast guests almost six years ago on season one. We discuss the challenges of being a kinship adoptee, the things that are often overlooked (like estrangements and other conflicts) that can force children to be unfairly used as weapons. We also talk about what it feels like to be a generational trauma cycle-breakers as Mary is expecting her first child.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Bastards by Mary Anna King (Listen to her first [Episode 7] and second appearances [Episode 67] on Adoptees On) * What Next? The Adoptee Rights Podcast - episode 6 “Cleanup” with the Vermont Adoptee Rights Working Group * Vermont Adoptee Rights Working Group * Adoptee Rights Law * Hear more about Greg Luce on his Adoptees On episode 182

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is the brilliant Sullivan Summer! Growing up as a black transracial adoptee with white adoptive parents, Sullivan was actively discouraged from identifying as black by her adoptive mother. She shares about her recent decision to change her full name as a sign of identity reclamation and we also discuss the intersection of adoption, race, and the United States’ history of slavery.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Outsiders Within: Writing on Transracial Adoption (re-release 2021) edited by Jane Jeong Trenka, Julia Chinyere Oparah, and Sun Yung Shin * University of Minnesota Press podcast episodes with the editors of Outsiders Within: 1. What society gets wrong about transracial adoption: Sun Yung Shin, Shannon Gibney, and JaeRan Kim. 2. Korean and Vietnamese adoptees on the intimate racialized politics of transracial adoption: Jane Jeong Trenka, Indigo Willing, and kimura byol-nathalie lemoine. 3. Outsiders Within: Korean adoptees Jane Jeong Trenka and Ami Nafzger share their stories. * National Association of Black Social Workers 1972 Position Statement on Transracial Adoption (a direct download is available here: https://cdn.ymaws.com/www.nabsw.org/resource/collection/E1582D77-E4CD-4104-996A-D42D08F9CA7D/NABSW_Trans-Racial_Adoption_1972_Position_(b).pdf )

Connect With Us * Sullivan Summer: Instagram * Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook * Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today’s guest is the incredible Stephanie Drenka, and we say incredible because she saw the need for an online platform for underrepresented communities and went ahead and built VISIBLE magazine in one night. Stephanie talks about her shifting view of adoption over time, how being raised in a predominantly white community caused her to experience internalized racism, and why sometimes when you see a need in the community, you’ve got to be the one to go ahead and fill the gap.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * VISIBLE Magazine (mentioned: article by Gracie) and VISIBLE on Instagram * Somebody’s Children: The Politics of Transnational and Transracial Adoption by Laura Briggs * Taking Children: A History of American Terror by Laura Briggs * Mentioned: Adoptees On episode addressing internalized racism (177 Healing Series Internalized Oppression)

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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The indomitable Dr. Hollee McGinnis is on the podcast today! Many of you have definitely heard of Hollee and her immense contributions to the adoptee community both academically as a scholar and as a community builder which includes starting the adoptee-centric organization, Also Known As, over 25 years ago. Today we get to talk about some deeply personal topics to Hollee, which of course includes community building, but we also discuss how Hollee’s perspective on adoption has changed over the years. Hollee shares how sometimes, who we see as the “high-performing adoptees” may be trying to outwork some internal struggles. Make sure you stick around until the end of the show as Hollee shares a poem she wrote about kimchi and how her breast cancer diagnosis lead her to a rediscovery of Korean food, this time as a cook!

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Adoption Initiative Conference: The Evolution of Adoption Practice: Activist and Community Perspectives - March 25-26, 2022 * Also Known As * iamadoptee.org * Rudd Adoption Research Program for scholarship on adoption

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Guest host Lisette Austin interviews her close lifelong friend Iana, who helped Lisette find her birth father using genetic genealogy. Iana shares her adoption and reunion story, and what led her to “come out of the fog” and begin exploring adoptee issues. She also shares what led her to become interested in genealogy, the importance of having a close adoptee friend, and what her top adoptee resources are. Together Lisette and Iana share some of the story behind their detective hunt, including a few of their favourite highlights.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * IFS Therapist Directory: https://ifs-institute.com/practitioners * Adoptees On episodes about IFS: 69, 71, 135 and 180 with Marta Isabella Sierra. Also discussed in episodes 70 and 175

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we’re talking with Lisette Austin, who is going to have a very special role here at Adoptees On, but we won’t spoil exactly what that is, yet. Lisette is an award-winning podcaster, passionate about travel, and also happens to be one of Haley’s good friends. We discuss what it’s meant for Lisette to learn more about her biological family using DNA testing and genealogical research and we share why this particular episode is a milestone marker in the life of the Adoptees On podcast.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Adoptee Literary Festival live for free on April 9, 2022! Follow on Instagram: @adopteelitfest * The Lost Family: How DNA Testing is Upending Who We Are by Libby Copeland

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we are honoured to introduce you to Mike Trupiano. Mike shares about his painful childhood, marred by violence and a feeling of being fully unwanted. We talk about adoptee healing, about searching for his biological family, which included a literal doorstop visit where he dressed up as a delivery driver. He’s a skilled storyteller, actor and comedian, also a sober coach. Now living in Germany, Mike’s worked so hard at self-care and reclaiming identity, we think you’ll join us in being in awe of the skills he’s built up.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Why Be Happy When You Could Be Normal by Jeanette Winterson * The Bourne Identity - 2002 Film * Mind over Matter - Jeanette Winterson’s newsletter on Substack

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we are joined by Melissa Guida-Richards, author of What White Parents Should Know about Transracial Adoption: An Adoptee's Perspective on Its History, Nuances, and Practices. Melissa is a late discovery adoptee, accidentally finding out at age 19 that she was adopted. She shares with us how she’s since reconciled with her adoptive mother and how they now navigate open conversations about race and adoption. Melissa also tells us about how and why she decided to educate and engage with adoptive parents both in print through her words, and in online discussions.

You can listen right here (turn up your sound 🔊🔊🔊) or search Adoptees On in any podcast app!

Find Adoptees On: 🌳 www.adopteeson.com/listennow 📱 Apple Podcasts http://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/adoptees-on/id1123372859
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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * What White Parents Should Know about Transracial Adoption: An Adoptee's Perspective on Its History, Nuances, and Practices By Melissa Guida-Richards * Adoptee Thoughts - Melissa Guida-Richards’s podcast * Adoption Mosaic (Hear more about Adoption Mosaic: Astrid Castro’s appearance on Adoptees On - Episode 156)

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today I’m talking with Jan Beatty, poet, professor and the author of the recently released memoir, American Bastard. We talk about how Jan wants to disrupt the traditional narrative, what she calls the “whitewashed” view of adoption. What happens when you publicly name your hockey-famous biological father, even after he denies your paternity claim? We even get to hear a reading from American Bastard, and it is so powerful it certainly made me tear up.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * American Bastard by Jan Beatty * The Body Wars by Jan Beatty (and other books of poetry) * Journey of the Adopted Self by B.J. Lifton * The West Pole by Diane Glancy

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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We’re so excited to share our guest’s story this week on Adoptees On. We’ve been following Lisa Olivera’s journey of healing for a while—inspired by the honesty and compassion she shares on her insanely popular Instagram account. Lisa is both a therapist and an adoptee, and anyone who follows this show on a regular basis knows that those two hats are not easy to swap. But she finds a way—through active and ongoing processing and a healthy portion of mindfulness.

When Lisa was only a few hours old, she was abandoned in a field by her biological mother and was adopted shortly after. During her conversation with Haley, Lisa shares her journey—of motherhood, her adoption, her healing, and her identity as an adoptee. She walks us through her path to personal growth, which relies heavily on the acceptance of the fact that she is and will always be an adopted person.

But what does that mean? As adoptees, how are we to reconcile with the gravity of that truth and eventually realize our own identities? And how do we speak our truths knowing that they may be uncomfortable (or painful) for others to hear?

One of our favourite things about Lisa (and there are a lot of them!) is her raw, deliberate honesty when it comes to adoptee grief. It’s simply a fact—adoption, relinquishment, and abandonment are life-long losses that need nurturing and understanding, not fixing. Adoptees need support, not saving.

Lisa’s book, Already Enough: a Path to Self Acceptance, explores how our stories affect our lives, and how reframing those stories can be life-changing. Listen to this week’s show to hear more of Lisa’s story, experience, and perspective as an adoptee.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Already Enough: A Path to Self Acceptance by Lisa Olivera, MFT * Make sure to followLisa’s encouraging Instagram account * No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model by Richard C. Schwartz, PHD

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today Leah Cooper shares how listening to hours and hours and hours of adoptees, birth families, and adoptive parents sharing their stories lead her to what she calls her “volcano of grief”. Leah was a part of a team that created a play called In My Heart: The Adoption Play Project, which has been transformed into a graphic novel. We discuss how the impact of unpacking her adoption experience has been transformational.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * In My Heart: The Adoption Story Project - Created by Alan Berks & Leah Cooper, Illustrated by Becca Hart * The somatic approach - using meditation, yoga, & ASMR * The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today's episode is like our class announcements for the winter semester of Adoptees On! We'll be back with some fabulous guests starting next Friday (listen to find out who will be joining us over the next couple of weeks!)

Free preview Patreon episode with all the details of our 2022 Book Club: Adoptees On(ly) Book Club 2022 Announcements

Check out our Adoptees On(ly) Book Club picks to add to your TBR pile: https://www.adopteeson.com/bookclub

Join our private community: https://www.adopteeson.com/community

Connect With Us * Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook * Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we are talking about celebrations with Pam Cordano, MFT because we are celebrating 200 episodes of the Adoptees On Podcast! Pam and Haley talk about how celebrations can often feel scary for us as adopted people because feeling joy or happiness can be disorienting (upper limit problem anyone?). Pam shares a few different reasons why we may feel that way, teaches us steps towards feeling happiness, and how to hold space for both good things and challenging things simultaneously.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * 10 Foundations for a Meaningful Life (No Matter What's Happened) by Pam Cordano, MFT * Read more about the “Upper Limit Problem” in The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we welcome back to Adoptees On, Brian Stanton. Brian shares with us how the pandemic morphed his script for a play into his fantastic new film @GhostKingdom. We talk about how relationships can shift for us as adopted people: building relationships with people we may believe are genetic relatives until it’s confirmed they aren’t, and how his conception story that Brian and his mother believed for decades got upended.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Brian Stanton’s film @GhostKingdom www.atghostkingdom.com and find a screening here * Adoption Truth and Transparency Worldwide Network * The Search for Mother Missing: A Peek Inside International Adoption by Janine Vance * Journey Of The Adopted Self: A Quest For Wholeness by Betty Jean Lifton

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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I’m thrilled to bring you today’s guest, Andrea Ross, author of Unnatural Selection: A Memoir of Adoption and Wilderness. Andrea shares how a health crisis lead her outdoors, and how a decade of spending time in the wilderness brought her a feeling of groundedness. We discuss the loneliness that adopted people can face and how we’ve both seen this theme of reconnecting with ancestral landscapes popping up more and more frequently.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Unnatural Selection: A Memoir of Adoption and Wilderness by Andrea Ross * The Wisdom of Wilderness: Experiencing the Healing Power of Nature by Gerald G. May * Adoption: The Making of Me podcast - Andrea’s episode

Notes for Colorado adoptees from a fellow adoptee, Anne: The Colorado Department of Human Services can give you your adoption file "If your adoption was handled by the state or a county, or the licensed child placement agency (LPCA) that handled your adoption has closed.“ I was able to receive this information even though I was not physically in Colorado. I just had to send a picture of my ID via email to confirm who I was. This service was free of charge.

Colorado adoptees who want to get their OBC and Report of an Adoption (which is basically like an integrated birth certificate and lists your names pre- and post-adoption, your adoptive parents, your birth parents, the date, time and place of your birth, and the attorney who filed the court documents for the adoption), need to contact the Colorado Department of Public Health and Environment or go to their website. There is a form to fill out and a fee to pay for this service.

One piece of information regarding sealed adoption information in Colorado is that circa 1990 all of the paper files were collected from the county courthouses to be microfiched and held centrally. So be prepared to received copies of microfiched film that is potentially difficult to decipher.

More info and links available here from Adoption Search Resource Connection (based in Colorado): www.asrconline.org/get-records

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we’re back in the spirituality series and we are taking a look at cults and high-demand groups. My guests have both been impacted by cults and they have a theory that adopted people may be more susceptible to these types of groups. Donna and Sara have extensively researched cults since they got out and have a ton of knowledge to share with us. They both tell their personal stories of how they inadvertently found themselves in high-demand groups, how they got out, and what adopted people specifically need to know about cults.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Sara Easterly’s previous appearance on Adoptees On E143 and Donna’s E79 * A Little Bit Culty Podcast * The Vow: NXIVM Documentary on HBO * Searching for Mom: A Memoir by Sara Easterly * Terror, Love and Brainwashing: Attachment in Cults and Totalitarian Systems, by Alexandra Stein

More reading, research and resources on the topic:

iGotOut www.igotout.org | Instagram | Twitter | Facebook
ICSA: International Cultic Studies Association
Traumatic Narcissism and Recovery: Leaving the Prison of Shame and Fear by Daniel Shaw
Terror, Love and Brainwashing: Attachment in Cults and Totalitarian Systems by Alexandra Stein
BITE Model of Authoritarian Control by Steven Hassan
Steven Hassan - What is a Cult? YouTube video with a whiteboard animation explaining the BITE Model
Take Back Your Life: Recovering from Cults and Abusive Relationships by Jana Lalich, Madeleine Tobias
The Gift of Fear : Survival Signals That Protect Us from Violence by Gavin DeBecker
Educated: A Memoir by Tara Westover
Sunderland, Paul “Relinquishment and Adoption: Understanding the Impact of and Early Psychological Wound” presentation for iCAAD London 2019, August 12, 2019. (His reference about religiosity/fundamentalism as something commonly seen in adoptees with developmental trauma comes in around 45 minutes in)
Podcast episode Roys Report “What Makes a Church a Cult” with guest Steven Hassan

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

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Today we welcome Jack Dermody to the podcast. We talk about family secrets in adoption and the impact it has on all the parties when they are revealed. Jack also gets personal and tells us what happens when you start closely examining your adoptee experience in your seventies. We talk about family preservation and adoptee support, and how that looks like community showing up for each other on a large scale.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * @GhostKingdom by Brian Stanton * Tree of Strangers by Barbara Sumner * It Takes a Village by Hillary Rodham Clinton

Connect With Us * Jack Dermody: Facebook * Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook * Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook

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We are revisiting the topic of estrangement today. Earlier in 2021 we did several episodes that examined estrangement and what made some of us decide to break contact with our adoptive families. When I was producing that series I always wanted to have an episode where we could talk about what it would look like to go BACK to our adoptive family after a period of estrangement. Can you ever go back once you’ve left?

Today Ellianna shares her experiences of reunion with her birth mother, and what lead to a decade-long estrangement from her adoptive family. She talks us through her decision-making process for reunification, and I was amazed to hear the depth of how she’s looked back on this and processed all the things that have gone on in her life so far.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model by Dr. Richard Schwartz * The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz * Previous Adoptees On episodes about Estrangement (playlist on Spotify) or there’s a list on the Adoptees On website here.

Connect With Us * Ellianna Javed: elliejaved [at] gmail [dot] com * Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook * Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook

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Adoptee Remembrance Day is commemorated annually on October 30th. This episode has a collection of recordings that listeners have submitted to the show on what Adoptee Remembrance Day means to them. Haley also shares a way you can show up for fellow adoptees during November, using #DearAdoptees.

Thank you to all who recorded your thoughts, it is deeply appreciated! If your audio was not included it was because we could not fix the quality of the audio recording, not because of the content.

*Content warning - this episode has mentions of suicide, self-harm, sexual assault, and other potentially triggering topics.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Adoptee Remembrance Day - commemorated annually on October 30th * What is Adoptee Remembrance Day? * Adoptee Remembrance Day Facebook Page * RSVP to the Adoptee Remembrance Day Event on Facebook * Adoptees Connect on Instagram | adopteesconnect.com | Facebook * Use the hashtag #DearAdoptees throughout November * Dear Adoption, dearadoption.com | Instagram | Facebook

Crisis Hotlines:

Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255 In July 2022, 988 will become the national three-digit code for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, some mobile carriers already support this number. USA
Crisis Services Canada 1-833-456-4566 24/7 (text 45645, available 4:00pm - 12:00am Eastern time) Canada
Crisis Text Line - text HOME to 741741 (USA & Canada)
Crisis Text Line UK: text HOME to 85258
Crisis Text Line Ireland: text HOME to 50808
List of Suicide Crisis Lines Worldwide
Sexual Assault Crisis Support (RAINN) 1-800-656-4673 (USA)
Trans Lifeline 1-877-565-8860 (USA)
Trans Lifeline 1-877-330-6366 (Canada)

Connect With Us * Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook * Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook

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Do we have to choose between our biological family and our adoptive family? What about choosing between their religions or spiritual practices? Mar shares how they are both Jewish and Catholic. We talk through how they chose adult conversion to Judaism as a way to feel permanently grafted to their adoptive family. Mar is also very open about how recovery programs have helped them to identify as spiritual but not religious.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Adoptee Voices & their new E-Zine * Adoptees & Addiction support group. You can hear Miguel talk more about it on Adoptees On episode 176

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Our guest today is scholar and author Susan Devan Harness. Susan shares from an anthropological perspective about the policies in place behind the Indian Adoption Project and why Indigenous placement with white families was preferred by the government. She also shares some of the current action in the US courts to undermine and remove the Indian Child Welfare Act and why it is so critical for us to pay attention to the cascading effects this could have. We do get personal too, about what happened for Susan in her forties as she unravelled what being adopted really meant: being separated both from her original family and from her original culture.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Bitterroot: A Salish Memoir of Transracial Adoption by Susan Devan Harness * Mixing Cultural Identities Through Transracial Adoption: Outcomes of the Indian Adoption Project (1958-1967) by Susan Devan Harness * White Mother to a Dark Race: Settler Colonialism, Maternalism, and the Removal of Indigenous Children in the American West and Australia, 1880-1940 by Margaret D. Jacobs * The Alliance for the Study of Adoption and Culture - Eighth Biennial Conference on Adoption and Culture, where Susan Devan Harness is one of the keynote speakers. Available virtually, most sessions were released on October 8, 2021 and there will be live Q&As October 22 & 23, 2021. * Adoptees Off Script Book Club with Susan Devan Harness October 30, 2021

For Further Education:

Podcast: This Land (Season Two) by Crooked Media
Adoptees On episodes on the Canadian Sixties Scoop (Series 6): E110 with Dr. Raven Sinclair, E112 with Christine Miskonoondinkwe Smith, and E114 with Inez Cook

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Today’s guest is Dr. Erin Heim who has spent a decade of her life researching and examining both the biblical texts in the New Testament that mention adoption as well as multiple books written from an evangelical perspective of adoption promotion. Erin teaches us what adoption looked like during the first century, and spoiler alert - it’s nothing like modern-day adoption. Erin and I also put a critical lens to how adoptees are treated in the church today, and how conflating biblical metaphors of adoption and modern-day adoption is harmful and keeping churches from embracing a family preservation stance.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Adoption in Galatians and Romans: Contemporary Metaphor Theories and the Pauline Huiothesia Metaphors by Dr. Erin M. Heim * Dr. Erin M. Heim’s chapter “The Inward Groaning of Adoption (Rom 8:12-25): Recovering the Pauline Adoption Metaphor for Mothers in the Adoption Triad (You can find that within the book Making Sense of Motherhood: Biblical and Theological Perspectives ed. by Beth Stovell) * Growing God’s Family: The Global Orphan Care Movement and the Limits of Evangelical Activism Book by Samuel L. Perry * On Script episode interview with Erin Heim: Adoption in Galatians and Romans

Connect With Us * Dr. Erin M. Heim * Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook * Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook

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I am thrilled to bring you Barbara Sumner today. Her literary memoir Tree of Strangers is one of the best books I read this year (and I’m including my non-adoption-related reading in that). Barbara and I talk about some of the painful experiences she recounts in her book. We also talk about some of the issues facing the adoptee community today, including Barbara’s perspective on adoption reform vs. the complete abolition of adoption.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Tree of Strangers by Barbara Sumner * Connecting with adopted people, Barbara mentions this Adopted Adults of NZ Facebook group * Barbara’s Newsletter * Barbara’s book club episode for Patreon supporters * “Mummy dearest - Bonnie Sumner interviews her mother Barbara Sumner”

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Today’s guest is brilliant poet Tiana Nobile whose recent collection of poems Cleave is an exceptional exploration of transnational adoption. Tiana shares her story with us from the deeply personal struggles to her in-depth research on the problematic history of adoption. Tiana also teaches us about contranyms and you’ll be in awe of the perfection of the title Cleave when she unpacks that for us.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Cleave by Tiana Nobile, Spirit of the Staircase by Tiana Nobile * Henry Goldkamp’s interview, “Disrupting Lexical Expectations in “Cleave” * Surviving the White Gaze by Rebecca Carroll * Find out more about Tiana’s upcoming workshops on her events page tiananobile.com/events * Tiana has requested we include a correction - “when talking about Operation Babylift, I said that 88 children died on the first flight, but it was actually 78 children”

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We’re celebrating five years of podcasting with a special Ask Me Anything episode. Listeners submitted questions for me (Haley) from “what are your plans for the coming season of Adoptees On?” to “where would you invest a million dollars to help the cause of adoptees?” I also share a bit about this amazing leaf-teardrop hybrid painted by JS Lee.

Show Notes

Mentioned Today * My story way back in season 1 * Barbara Sumner’s book - Tree of Strangers * Episode 32 - How to choose a therapist * Adoptee therapist directory: https://www.growbeyondwords.com/adoptee-therapist-directory/

Connect With Us * Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook * Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook

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We’re coming to our summer break! What better note to end on than this encouraging episode with Dr. Liz DeBetta. Liz has been on the podcast before and shared her story of coming to her late thirties before examining the impact adoption had on her life. Today though we are strictly diving into one of her areas of expertise which is using writing as a tool for healing. Writing is accessible, it has physical, emotional, and mental health benefits. Writing can help us create a new narrative for ourselves. Liz recently lead a group of adoptees through a transformative writing group and she shares some tools we can use to start our own writing practice.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Rudd Adoption Virtual Conference 2020-21 * Dr. Liz DeBetta’s presentation and the participant’s videos (shortand long) * Adoptees Connect - now planting new groups * Liz’s first appearance on Adoptees On E118 * Writing as a Way of Healing by Louise DeSalvo * Waitlist for the new writing groups https://forms.gle/iX6Ru8fcyHfFupkf7 Just note "No, I am not available for all sessions" to skip to the "I am interested in future opportunities" part of the form.

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I’m honoured to introduce you to my new friend Megan Culhane Galbraith today. Megan’s brand new book The Guild of the Infant Saviour is out in the world and is getting rave reviews, especially from fellow adoptees. Today we talk about the challenges of building a relationship after the first moments of reunion are finally realized. Megan shares how she views the patterns of silencing adoptees from childhood into our adulthood. Did you know there used to be a program at Cornell that used “practice babies” sourced from foundling homes to teach women how to be mothers? Megan describes the impact of researching these barbaric Domecon experiments on us as adoptees, as humans turned into objects like dolls.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * The Guild of the Infant Saviour: An Adopted Child’s Memory Book by Megan Culhane Galbraith * The Dollhouse Exhibit * Palimpsest by Lisa Wool-Rim Sjöblom and you can support on Patreon here and hear Lisa’s episode (130) on Adoptees On

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Today I’m excited to introduce you to Lora K. Joy. Lora tells us she always knew she didn’t fit in with her adoptive parents, and that she made promises to herself that she would do things differently. Lora recounts a transformative moment where she grieved her adoption loss that intrinsically changed her forever. We also unpack some of the things that lead to her decision to become estranged from her adoptive parents and how she maintains her protective boundary.

Show Notes

Recommended Resources * Goodbye Hypervigilance: Healing Adoptee Worry by Lora K. Joy * Adoptee Epiphanies on Facebook and Instagram created by Pamela Karanova (adopteesconnect.com)

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