N.A.R.C. Troopers: Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Collaborators: Recent Episodes
Prajinta Pesqueda
N.A.R.C. provides information to facilitate learning and healing from abuse betrayal following relationships with cluster B disordered individuals (narcissists, sociopaths, psychopaths as well as comorbidities like addiction). Content will cover carefully researched material, collaboration with mental health professionals, and interviews with both victim-survivors and experts in the field of NPD. There is a lack of information and a lot of misinformation, so our task is to shine a light on the topic so you may make informed decisions about your healing journey.
What is the relationship between narcissists and demonic entities? I have some ideas to share.
Understanding the different types of Cluster B disorders can help you achieve clarity about these disorders. BPD diagnosis or traits can spell disaster and attract narcissists.
Today, we look at a few religious, Christion perspectives on the cluster B disorfers of malignant barcissism and psychopathy.
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This is what it's like> And this is what to do next.
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The person with NPD has a collection of deficits, impairments, and maladaptive behaviors that make them what they are- dangerous predators with no empathy or remorse.
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Let's examine the depth of our lived experiences through the lens of a series of metaphors and imagery so we can understand the shallow facade of the person with NPD.
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The Covert Narc is an insidious person who gently destroys every part of your life including your identity.
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You may know Robert Torbay from Quora where he has various sites about Cluster B disorders and writes fan fiction.
Like Dr. Sam Vaknin and HG Tudor, these are the giants of our time who understand narcissism and other Cluster B disorders from the inside out.
His writing is poignant, his insight profound, and as a conversationalist, he possesses a candid and unvarnished approach to elevated topics with occasional controversial underpinnings.
Sit back, grab a treat or some tea, and enjoy this exploration into the dark corners of the narcissist's world.
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Regardless of how you say it, how many times you say it, the different ways you say it , no matter what you do, the narcissist does not speak your langaue. They may look at you and nod in agreement or parrot your words, but they can't understand what you are saying. And they never will.
So preserve your dignity and just walk away. It's the only thing you can do.
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Understanding these dangerous and disordered people is critical to recognizing them and keeping your distance.
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A hobosexual does not necessarily have to be a narcissist, but many times they are. The somatic narcissist is an alpha predator and opportunist, so the idea of leveraging their bodies to receive "fuel" is quite understandable. Welcome to the first episode of season 10!
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Understanding this concept helps to understand how the narcissist operates and what to watch for. As people with Cluster B disorders increase in number, it is good to now who you're dealing with and what to watch for.
- Last episode of season 9
Est. 20 podcasts per season
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The things to avoid in the journey to wellness after a relationship with a narcissist.
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Research shows that narcissism is heritable. Let's see how much is in our genes.
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When you are cast out of the shared fantasy, and you hit the ground with a thud, it is tough to stand up, dust off, and keep going. But that is exactly what you have to do.
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The person with NPD has spatial and language deficits that shape their disorder. Let's unpack the fundamental beggings of these impaired individuals.
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Not only do we need to work on healing ourselves, we need to work on healing the world around us. . . and by doing so, we will get better.
Ending suffering is important as a fundamental human right for all peoples, and that is a great thing to work towards.
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I think this what we all want to say to all the people out there who may be potential new partners in our lives. Feel free to share it with them, then use it as a springboard for conversation. Their response might be quite telling!
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The narcissist is Don Quixote
from Man of La Mancha
To dream ... the impossible dream ...To fight ... the unbeatable foe ...To bear ... with unbearable sorrow ...To run ... where the brave dare not go ...To right ... the unrightable wrong ...To love ... pure and chaste from afar ...To try ... when your arms are too weary ...To reach ... the unreachable star ...This is my quest, to follow that star ...No matter how hopeless, no matter how far ...To fight for the right, without question or pause ...To be willing to march into Hell, for a Heavenly cause ...And I know if I'll only be true, to this glorious quest,That my heart will lie will lie peaceful and calm,when I'm laid to my rest ...And the world will be better for this:That one man, scorned and covered with scars,Still strove, with his last ounce of courage,To reach ... the unreachable star ...
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These two concepts are instrumental in understanding what happens in a relationship with a narcissist. I share how it happened to me. Please learn more. Dr. Vaknin has many great lectures on entrainment.
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Six steps to get you going down the right road following narcissistic abuse.
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We begin with a dream that illustrates the layers of unresolved torment that lurk in our subconscious and the deepest parts of our brains. Then we discuss the 5 major things that hold us back from a full recovery following abusive relationships with those who have NPD>
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Amy Punt is my guest and the topic is about the infiltration of narcissists into every major system including the church. She discusses her experience with spiritual narcissism. We explore the cult-like conditioning, the support of the masses, and the consequences of a culture that glorifies narcissistic traits. Winning is everything, regardless of how you do it or who gets hurt on that road to victory.
You can find Amy Punt on Medium and other writing platforms.
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Why do victims of narcissistic abuse feel so lonely and have trouble connecting with others after their experience with them? It is quite typical, so how to we end the loneliness during what can be a lengthy recovery.
Bonus: What is PNSD?
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Solipsism and narcissism have quite a bit in common. Let's take a look at what that means with a brief philosophical examination.
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Interview with Kshama on co-parenting with a narcissist.
Kshama is an Empowerment Coach. She coaches professional women to transform their lives by shifting from feeling rejected and fearful to empowered and happy. Her mission is to empower women to deepen their self-awareness, find their purpose and direction, and move from inaction to powerful action.
Being married to a narcissist and coming out a winner led her to become an Empowerment Coach. Kshama would like to share her experience and expertise on your show.
Coach Kshama Singhi's Profile Links:-
Email - singhikshama@gmail.com
Website - https://www.coachkshama.comLinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/kshamasinghiFacebook - https://www.facebook.com/JourneyToYourBestSelf/Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/being_you_with_kshama/
Media Page - https://coachkshama.com/podcasts-and-media/
Prajinta, please let Coach Kshama know if she is a good fit, and what would be the next steps.
Awaiting your response.
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The narcissist may be gone, but they live on inside of you. Because of the enmeshment, brainwashing, entrainment, intermittent reinforcement, parentification, and more manipulative and predatory techniques, you are poisoned. You are filled with introjects (the narcissist's voice), ruminations, peptide addiction dopamine cravings, trauma bonding and the list goes on!
This explains in part why recovery from such a relationship is so difficult and unlike any other!
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Welcome to Season 9! Each season has about 20 episodes and we are now approaching 250 podcast episodes.
"Holy trauma, Bayman!"
Today, we take an expanded 45-minute deep dive into the failing systems and warnings that should compel us to do better. The time is ripe for narcissists to rise to power and we are rapidly producing a new crop of them continually with our misplaced priorities and bad choices. Probably a bit preachy at times but painfully true all of the time. Not just opinions but facts about where we are headed and why. Even some tips on how to turn it around. Enjoy
NOTE: The podcast begins after a 5-minute explanation of where Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Collaborators (N.A.R.C. Troopers) is at this juncture and where I am headed.
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A reflection on the valuable lessons I learned in the months and years following the discard.
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"You're in the jungle, baby. I'm gonna watch you bleed."
It's hard to believe that your dream come true could shapeshift in the most heartless cold-blooded predator you could ever imagine.
It's nothing personal. It's just what they are.
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The person with NPD with a splash of psychopathy may have no fear, but they sure know how to loathe you. It's a wild trip to Fantasy Island, then a mysterious death.
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Sadism and Narcissism are "close cousins" in every sense and often overlap in pathological ways. Let's explore the sadistic narcissist.
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The shy vulnerable covert narcissist is often adorable, polite, charismatic, and helpful. Beware, they even convince themselves they are the good guy, but make no mistake. They are missing key components of humanity and are actually empty hollow actors only playing a part in a play.
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How does the world perceive someone who stays with a mentally ill predatory beast and chooses them over their friends and family? You know the answer. It is not kind. But they will never really understand, so who can blame them? What you can focus on instead. . .
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After the narcissist, it is not uncommon to experience a period of self-trashing, and this self-trashing often involves unsavory sexual liaisons. Forgive yourself, find your boundaries, and create a safe space to recover fully before rushing out into the world. It is dangerous out there.
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How do you summon the will to live after a brutal discard?
Many of us find it hard enough to get through the daily anxieties and injustices of every day life. When the narcissist abandons you, there is usually a scorched earth policy where they burn your whole life to the ground with you in it, then erase you like it never happened.
How do you rise from the smouldering ashes to start again?
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When you are in the shared fantasy with the narcissist, time keeps moving on without you. It is as if you were in a coma and when you awaken, everything is different and the people who were most important to you have gone on with their lives without you. It is a confusing and heartbreaking loss. The sooner we get back to reality, the better!
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8/episode 11 looks at what happens after narcissistic abuse. You lose everything and have a really hard time getting up and getting on. What can we do about it?
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What does it mean to be alive? The person with NPD is not truly alive by most definitions. Let's take a look at what it means to be alive and what separates the narcissist from a neurotypical healthy human.
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After a relationship with a disordered narcissist, it is common to have anxiety and even panic. We discuss 5 maladaptive bad ways to respond to anxiety that can lead to the bad place. Then we discuss better alternatives to get a positive outcome.
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A relationship with a narcissist is all about death. Their death (they killed themselves a long time ago), your death (the narcissist must "kill you" to separate and individuate), the "dead mother (that caused all this in the first place), the death of your identity and agency, and the death of everything around them.
So when they are gone, why is there still a problem? And what can we do to get past it!
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There are soooo many effects that a covert malignant narcissist has aon their significant other. And the worst part is that all of this abuse can cause an addiction to them which in turn causes emotional, psychological, physiological, neuro-chemical, energetic, and just about every other type of disruption, sickness, and injury in the victim.
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The silent treatment is one of the narcissist's favorite weapons to use against you at different stages in the relationship. At some point, we need to accept what they are and let them go- knowing they are very sick people. In the meantime, getting to know our own silence spaces can bring us peace.
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Teahna Nicole Edralin is our guest today. A powerful healer and personal friend, I am pleased to discuss the concept of disempowerment with her and how we can claim our power following relationships with narcissists.
Message from Teahna:
Take a stand for your recovery. I want and would be honored to help you.
For Complimentary Discovery Calls with FREE energy work Complimentary Consultation (teahnanicoleedralin.com)
or TEXT; 662-710-0004
with "NT Discovery Calls"
Full website: https://www.teahnanicoleedralin.com
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THE TYPE OF ATTACHMENT STYLE we have influences how we RECOVER from relationships with MALIGNANT NARCISSISTS. Neurotypical people can modify or change their attachment styles, but the narcissist has flat attachment and can never change.
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What is at the heart of narcissistic personality disorder? Understanding Object inconstancy, discontinuous memory, and object relations will make everything come into focus.
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Well meaning people may do more harm then good when they try to support the narcissistic abuse victim. It's important to understand the unique journey to recovery.
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After the narcissist, we are different. How does their brain work, and how does it change us? For more with guest, Phoenix Gould, visit these links.
Free Radical Self-Love MeditationFacebook Group For WomenFacebook Group for Men
E-mail Phoenix
Book Free 20min Coffee chat with Phoenix
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There are casualties in a relationship with a person with NPD. Everyone goes down, and the narcissist rides into the sunset to live hollowly ever after.
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My assertion is that all narcissists and psychopaths are walking invitations for dark forces to inhabit them. I believe they carry a "Vacancy" sign that draws entities to them who crawl into the empty space within them and proceed to influence their decisions, perceptions, behavior, etc. . .
I have witnessed this phenomenon face to face. This is my testimony and a cautionary plea to protect yourself.
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This is the last episode of season 7. After a brief hiatus, season 8 will bring more episodes to enlighten and educate, inspire and support. Keep listening and keep healing!Betty Jo Greenlee discusses shame, blame, and finding your voice on today's interview/Betty Jo is the founder of Discover Life Coaching and a former victim of emotional abuse who needlessly carried the embarrassment and shame of two toxic marriages that ended in divorce. Now, Betty Jo is a victorious survivor who uses everything she learned, climbing out of her pain to help others. Coupling that with her 10 years of experience as a mental health advocate, today, she guides those who feel lost, don't trust themselves, or know what they want, to rise up and take charge of creating a life they love. Her mission through her 1 on 1 personal coaching and her online course is to help many discover what lights them up so they become the change they want.website https://lifecoachdiscover.comFBhttps://www.facebook.com/dicovercoach--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/pesqueda/message
Today's guest speaks about parental narcissism, the shame and blame , and ways to move beyond the abuse.
Dr. Praveena is a Certified Mental Health & Awareness practitioner and works with parental narcissistic abuse victims. She uses various techniques and coping mechanisms, including her personal life experience, to help victims recognize abusive behaviors, heal and live an empowered life. She has also created a framework known as the Narcissistic Victim Empowerment Technique (NVET) to help victims find freedom from manipulating and controlling thoughts of toxic parenting. She understands that many may find it difficult to speak about parental narcissistic abuse due to the trauma bondage and societal perception associated with it, hence Dr. Praveena takes it as a personal mission to empower as many individuals out there to take the reins of their own life.
Dr. Praveena has a dedicated column called “Mind the Mind” in The Sun; Malaysia’s national daily where she writes about mental health awareness. Also, Dr. Praveena sits on the board of the Malaysia Mental Health Association (MMHA)
On the professional front, Dr. Praveena wears various hats. As an engineer, academician, researcher, and avid animal activist, Dr. Praveena holds notable positions in multiple non-profit organizations and serves as a voice for issues pertaining to the environment and animals. She is currently a senior lecturer at Taylor’s University.
For her numerous contributions to society as a whole: people, environment, and animals namely, Dr. Praveena has received Malaysia's Women Leaders Award from the World Women Leadership Congress.
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Imagery is another tool for your toolbox that works wonders for many who are suffering from the aftermath of narcissistic abuse.
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Tough times are here and you may be recovering from a relationship with a narcissist. Double whammy!x!
So how do you navigate these perilous waters? I have some tips for you.
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When the going gets tough, the tough put their tits up. It's all about being resilient and plucky.
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Narcissist, another Cluster Beach, Disordered Center, visuals in fact, their partners, in a way that makes them sick. Even after they’re gone, the infection lives in the body like a chronic, inflammatory disease. Understanding this may give you an edge to heal effectively.--- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/pesqueda/message
Continuous memory is an essential to emotional empathy, compassion, and reflection. Cluster B disordered people who do not have it are lacking a core quality that makes them human. When they leave, and they all leave sooner or later, they hit the delete button and you disappear as if you never existed. No memories, no regrets, not accountability, no sadness- just instant erasure and complete amnesia. What could be more soul-crushing to their partner than to be deleted and forgotten with absolutely no reflection or remorse? It is a fate worse than death. We remember the dead with respect and kindness. Not so with the narcissist, sociopath, or psychopath. You disintegrate in a moment, and there is nothing to remember.
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I begin with 3 perspectives about what the narcissist is ranging back into the past 1902-1907. There was an awareness of "their kind" even 100+ years ago. But where do they fit into the picture of current change. Is that where we are headed? Into a collective consciousness of hollow remorseless callousness? Are they simply an adaptation that was necessary to survive the modern world? Or are they harbingers of decay, depravity, emptiness, and soullessness that seem to increase every day?
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Jung described a constellated self where the individual is ordered and everything works in taddem with everything else in a natuarl, organized and constant way. Narcissists and other Cluster B disordered people do not have this design.
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Recovery from a relationship with a person within PDA is a complex and layered experience. You spend a vast amount of time, trying to figure out what just happened to you, what they are, and what made you susceptible to it in the first place. At some point, we will need to turn away from that, and begin to focus on yourself. It is only through introspection and self reflection that we can grow and mend and heal and become whole and happy.--- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/pesqueda/message
The narcissist and psychopath use people because they are not real and human and unique- they are all just objects to play with for awhile then cast aside for the next new thing. I am not fungible, disposable, interchangeable, replaceable. I am one of a kind. Even in a world where everything is built for the here and the now with no long term commitment, even in the multiverse, even in the transactional society that is always searching for what best serves them. That is my manifesto. It should be yours , too.
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Remember that Death Cab for Cutie song from 20 years ago? Well, my darkness is encroaching blindness which might frighten even the most average spouse. But mine was a covert narcissist, so sticking around to be there for a partner with a disability is simply not something they are capable of doing. If you are in a relationship with one, stay healthy and strong. They can't be there for you if you are in need. Let's launch into this dark matter and see if there is a helpful take-away.
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The world has changed over the past 10+ years. We have lost our souls in exchange for searching for things that "serve us" and throwing away anything that is inconvenient or boring. We have lost our moral compass and have become ethically bankrupt. The world has corrupted us with promises of wealth and power that never ever come as we ruthlessly compete in a landscape of scarcity and lack. The narcissist, sociopath, and psychopath have risen to power and are leading us off a cliff as they get richer and we get poorer. The result? Violence, perversion, despair, apathy, addiction, death. Let's step back and stop this madness.
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Dreams of vengeance, justice, karma? Obsession with getting even, balancing the scales, teaching them a lesson? Refusing to accept being erased, forgotten, annihilated, deleted? Plotting and planning revenge fantasies and driven by rage?
But what if they are already dead? Takes the wind right out of your sails, doesn't it?
How can you harm someone who is already the poster child for abuse? Someone so mentally delusional and sick?
It's a tough situation. What do you do?
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Limerence, experienced by both the narcissist and their partner, is not love and may not even be prerequisite for love. It is more of a middle school crush kind of thing only involving the neuro-chemicals of the brain and even peptide addiction. Loneliness is something many of us who are codependent or have problematic attachment styles or abandonment issues fear worse than death. It is a "howling wilderness" that screams to be comforted.It helps to understand both iso you can move toward healthy emotional connections with yourself and others.
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Three categories are discussed:
-
The professionals, researchers, medical and mental health community
-
The narcissistic abuse recovery facilitators
-
The narcissists who are experts on their own disorder
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What makes a person deelop narcissistic personality disorder?
We all have a healthy dose of narcissism, but how is a malignant, pathological one made? One that has no remorse, accountability, morals, love, or attachment to anyone. One that creates a false persona and wears a mask 24/7 that could fool even the most brilliant expert. One that cannot create a decent or stable life, self-sabotages, is reckless and impulsive, and always plays the victim?
How do you make one of those?
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For most of my life, I have been a narcoholic. I am someone who chose a disordered, malignant, pathological narcissist 3 times in my life, marrying them, having children with them, and ultimately, being discarded by them. I am currently sober, living one day at a time, trying to maintain no contact, and promising myself to never fall prey to another narcissist. Many of you will feel the truth in my story. It will resonate with you because it is a common dynamic. We must heal ourselves, do the work, and get free. It is a matter of life or death.
Please send questions or schedule 1:1 sessions at Narc2Thrive@gmail.com
I am unable to respond to voice messages left here at this time.
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The relationship with the borderline and narcissist is powerful. By themselves, they are a tornado. Together, they are the perfect storm.
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The narcissist plays many roles in a relationship. Each one is so very real and convincing that it cannot be detected by even the most brilliant trained person. There is no other experience like it!
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For those who missed it, this is the part of the webinar where tips are offered to manage stress, anxiety, and depression during the holiday season. Licensed therapist Cathy Angi Brownell, trauma and PTSD trained art therapist and somatic interventionist joined me along with Myla Morningstar, writer and Quora content writer and married to a covert narcissist for nearly 30 years.
The Q & A was not shared, but another free event will be available for the next big hurdle. . . Valentine's Day.
Contact Cathy LPC at healingjourneys500@gmail.com
Contact me at Narc2Thrive@gmail.com
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This colloquial phrase has two meanings, and we are going to take a look at both. Maybe it's is exactly what we need to do.
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I practice an accent as I warn about the dangers of too much talk about narcissists and too much trust in the misinformation and disinformation provided by so many hacks on social media. Let's have a little fun, shall we?
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An audio version of a video I made for Riverside.
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The narcissist is famous for blame-shifting and projecting his own issues onto others. They will never take accountability for their actions nor will they ever feel guilty for how they harm other people. It's all a game, and they are convinced that they must win it no matter what.
FREE LIVE EVENT! Tips on how to navigate through the challenges of the holiday season followed by a Q & A.
Join two recovery facilitators and a licensed counselor to learn about ways to take care of yourself during a stressful time of year.
zTopic: Surviving the Holidays Webinar with Myla, Cathy, & Jin
Time: Nov 5, 2022 11:00 AM Pacific Time (US and Canada)
Join Zoom Meeting
https://us06web.zoom.us/j/81022310915?pwd=ejNzY1FBNC9GZm83MWtpcGI3MlE3Zz09
Meeting ID: 810 2231 0915
Passcode: 445333
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Evil is an absence of God. That is all I know of heaven and hell. My husband was not the devil, but the absence of being was profound.
Music provied by: -DJKMUSIKK
Song: Dying Rose
https://soundcloud.com/ayan-kohli/dying-rose-djkmusikk?si=068441f3bc04478f815e28c6d4bbf160&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing
FREE LIVE EVENT! Tips on how to navigate through the challenges of the holiday season followed by a Q & A.
Join two recovery facilitators and a licensed counselor to learn about ways to take care of yourself during a stressful time of year.
zTopic: Surviving the Holidays Webinar with Myla, Cathy, & Jin
Time: Nov 5, 2022 11:00 AM Pacific Time (US and Canada)
Join Zoom Meeting
https://us06web.zoom.us/j/81022310915?pwd=ejNzY1FBNC9GZm83MWtpcGI3MlE3Zz09
Meeting ID: 810 2231 0915
Passcode: 445333
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Today, I sit down with several 14 and 15-year-old girls who ask the question: What event has changed your life? The conversation goes toward abuse and how it shapes our lives. It looks like in most ways, we all want the same things.
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The Cluster B disordered person is hollow, and if you stay too long, they will scoop out all of your being and you will be hollow just like them.
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The Narcissist, the Codependent, and the Empath walk into a bar....
Yeah, no, but really.
Why do they gravitate to one another and have such intense relationships, at least for a while?
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Let's ponder what makes us human and what makes an animal an animal and where the narcissist fits in this bigger picture.
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Experts agree that many narcissists share common features with other types of personality disorders, especially Cluster B. It is also important to know there are distinguishing characteristics that set them apart. Sometimes they can even pair up and a person could have several different types of maladaptive, trauma based disorders. Let's take a look.
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Today, we talk about different kinds of vision. The way we see things. The way the world looks through the eyes of a narcissist. And most importantly, we end with the big suprise. . . what is HAPPY DONUT?
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This episode comes with a disclaimner and trigger alert that the content, approach, and l;anguage may be too potent for people who are not a place to receive it. Are you stuck, ruminating and longing and craving and dreaming about the narcissist and unable to put them down and let them go? A self-aware narcissist and possible borderline who has amazing self-awareness and insight offers a strong dose of medicine that may be hard to swallow but possibly turn out to be the kick in your pants to get you unstuck and moving along. Narcissistic abuse recovery is not for the feint hearted. We discuss the victimhood trap and how we, the surviviors and thrivers, must be more "McGuyvers in our approach to recovery where we are solutions oriented problem solvers who get the job done whatever it takes. At some point, the focus is NOT on the narcissist, but on YOU! Take accountability for your part in it all, ask why, figure it out, and fix it. Freedom and happiness and health await those who are fierce and determined. Let's put down the "narc-pipe", end our addiction, get acquainted with our power and value, and do what we need to do to be ready for the future that's coming.
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They will promise you the moon covered in chocolate and dipped in gold, but it is fiction. Even if they belive their own idealized snapshot of you for a while, make no mistake. It will end. They are not your forever love. The sooner you accept this truth, the easier it will be to recover.
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Robert Torbay has attained the esteemed position as a leading expert of Cluster B disorders on the Quora platform. How does he stand apart from others in the field of this study?
Experts in the field typically offer polished, packaged programs at a cost to those seeking guidnace through the murky waters of narcissistic abuse recovery. Others write from a mental health perspective but not necessarily as gifted writers. And yet others write from the perspective of victims, empaths, and spokesmen due to their personal experience. Many have no training on the subject.
Robert Torbay is a unicorn in the sense that he can elucidate the internal mechanisms of Cluster B and execute it with the writing chops and gift of evocative words and imagery that convey a more visceral and authentic portrayal of the subject.
I have a special appreciation for his work because I, too, am not offering a program or anything for sale. I offer insight, well crafted words, and the gift of knowledge paired with empathy for the journey. He and I are truly unique in these ways.
Coming to us from his home in New Zealand, we are fortunate to get a glimpse behind the curtain with this enigmatic genius.
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The covert narcissist is deadly.
They are impulsive, remorseless, reckless, and devoid of emathay or mercy.
Imagine what you could accomplish if you conscience, morals, religious beliefs and sense of decency and integrity didn't stop you.
So what's stopping the narcissist?
Nothing.
And therein lies the problem.
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You must know, that although a covert pathological narcissist is the pinnacle of sweetness and charm, he (she) is a destroyer. Perhaps the doom and despair the narcissist ushers in is actually the beginning of a new, improved 2.0 version of yourself.
Maybe it's too early in your recovery to latch on to that idea, but let it marinate. It has merit.
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Conversation with Myla Morningstar about narcissistic abuse. Essential, illuminating discussion that will help everyone understand what really happens in these ill-fated relationships.
Want to contact the guest speaker? Myla Morningstar Kinikini
Narcissist Survival Expert & Transition Life Coach “Victim by Chance, Survivor by Choice”
Roadsidenamaste@gmail.com to book life coaching sessions
Roadsidenamaste.com
Quora spaces
Myla Morningstar’s Hidden: Covert Narcissism
https://mylamorningstarshiddencovertnarcissism.quora.com/?ch=17&oid=2260261&share=396067ef&srid=8R9qj⌖_type=tribe
Myla Morningstar’s The Narcissist’s Wife
https://mylamorningstarsthenarcissistswife.quora.com/?ch=17&oid=1707559&share=396067ef&srid=8R9qj⌖_type=tribe
Myla Morningstar’s The Art of Narcissism.
https://mylamorningstarandfriendstheartofnarcissism.quora.com/?ch=17&oid=2269528&share=396067ef&srid=8R9qj⌖_type=tribe
Medium
Myla Morningstar Kinikini
https://medium.com/@mylabatsonkinikini
Want to contact the host, P. Pesqueda?
Email: Narc2Thrive@gmail.com
Website: http://www.narctroopers
Podcast channel
YouTube Vlog
Nearly 200 articles at www.pesqued.medium.org
NOTICE: THIS IS THE LAST EPISODE OF SEASON 5.
STAY TUNED FOR SEASON 6, AND BE SURE TO SUBSCRIBE TO GET ALL NEW EPISODES!
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The person with NPD (narcissistic personality disorder) will use deception and delusion to deceive both the people around them as well as themselves. It can have deadly consequences.
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The world as we know it is changing. The fabric of societies is unraveling at an alarming pace. But we, the victims/volunteers who were torpedoed and trashed by the pathological narcissist in our lives, we are ready for anything! If got off the ground and if we are still standing now, then we are ready for anything.
I say, Let's bring marshmallows and chocolate and make S'Mores as the world burns.
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The person with NPD has a brain that is so damaged and dysregulated that he/she cannot function like a neurotypical person with a healthy brain. These brain irregularities prevent them from leading a normal life and having healthy long-term relationships. For the person recovering from a relationship with a malignant narcissist, accepting their mental limitations is an important step to healing.
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There is more to recovery from narcissistic mindf*ck than traditional psychology or psychiatry can offer. There is a psychic, energetic, vibrational power that Cluster B mentally and spiritually unwell people have that is mind-blowing, addictive, and long-lasting. Do not underestimate their cultlike, predatory, power of brainwashing and co-opting your identity altogether.
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There are so many things happening in the world today that need our attention. Being focused on the narcissist who mistreated you is a waste of time and energy since they can never be repaired. It is time to shift our priorities and give our attention to ourselves and the world around us, not to someone too unwell and damaged to change or care.
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A letter to my x-husband on the three-year anniversary of "the discard."
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One size fits all generic intervention at a time when your world has been blasted to smithereens is simply not going to be enough. Traditional treatment and intervention have their place along with prescription support and faith-based resources ; however, there is more to recovery that cannot be achieved through these traditional methods. Energy work can complete the treatment program.
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Long after the narcissist has gone away and reinvented a new persona with someone else, the victim suffers from "introjects" in their head. They cannot tell what is their own thoughts and those of the narcissist that has corrupted their mind. There are three important voices to be able to identify, and full recovery and freedom from the narcissist may be dependent on your understanding and identification of these voices.
It may very well be the most important tool for separating from the narcissist and regaining agency and power over your own life.
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I am moving cross country this week, wrapping up a school week, and addressing numerous other challenges, but I wanted to stay true to my weekly podcast. So this one is a late late night recording of something worthy of exploration. How do we pray for the narcissist in our lives? How do we pray for our own healing? And why does God not respond to our petition to heal the narcissist?
This podcast is now a video on Spotify. Enjoy.
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When the narcissist is gone, they leave behind a horrible legacy. They implant three voices in your head that render you captive to intrusive thoughts and a complete hi-jacking of your own inner voice which is replaced by these introjects. You must identify them and get them out like an infestation or disease. It is one of the reasons it is so hard to let them go and stop thinking about them. It is one of the reasons you do not have power over your own life.
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The narcissist must always be hero or victim. The covert narcissist loves their pity pot and sits on it much of the time to get supply from others who believe their poor me scenarios and pity play. Make no mistake. They are neither hero or victim, and the longer you stay, the more victimized you will become. It is yet another way the malignant covert narcissist is incapable of experiencing life the way neurotypicals do.
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St. Augustine was saved by his mother Monica who wept for him as she petitioned God. In my marriage, we both wept at different times for different reasons, but my prayers went unanswered. Here is a look at why that may be the case with people with NPD.
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In the time after the relationship with a person with NPD, the key to a full recovery and restoration of your agency and power is to retrieve who you were before the narcissist entered your life. Do you remember that person? You had an identity. You have a "self." There was life before and there will be life after.
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The end of a relationship with a narcissist is in no way a regular, typical experience. It involves the whole body, mind, soul energy, identity, neurobiology and even the cellular function of the discarded partner. Understanding the nature of the addiction and the different types of addicts is important to the recovery journey. Let's dive in!
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Let's have a little quirky fun that might be amusing. What movie most resembles your life? For me, it's the Wizard of Oz. I've been trapped in that darn place most of my life and forced to deal with a host of wild characters and scary monkeys. Let's take a look!
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These two tactics go together like chicken and biscuits. You can't successfully have one without the other. The goal is to get to the place of IDGAF while practicing No Contact. This powerful strategy will help you get "rinse that man right outta my hair." Okay, that is a line from a shampoo commercial from the 70's that most of you were not even born yet to see.
Seriously, forgive yourself if you goof up once in a while, but ultimately we have to get this right if we ever want to be free and whole again.
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What makes people mentally ill? Are they born that way? Created by trauma? Part of family dysfunction?
It is common knowledge that a malignant narcissist of any stripe and a true primary or secondary psychopath can never be cured.
It is a terminal diagnosis.
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Today's podcast runs a little long but is a deep dive into the reasons behind the narcissist partner wanting you dead at the end of the relationship. Their contempt and hatred can be traced back to a few fundamental reasons: faulty splitting and injury, mortification, & collapse. So slip into something comfy and grab some yummy snacks and let's have a little look at what is going on!
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Following narcissistic abuse, it is common for the discarded partner to feel in a Normas sense of loss and despair. The complete annihilation of their identity, the abrupt re-entry into reality from the shared psychotic fantasy, the Nuro chemical dysregulation in the brain, the cognitive dissonance and shock that the abruptness and cruelty of the discard… All of these things compound recovery and make it a difficult and challenging experience. The enormous loss can cause despair and grief that is difficult to overcome. Today’s topic is prolonged grief syndrome which is a new diagnosis in the fifth edition of the diagnostic manual.
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If you are coming out of a relationship with a narcissist, you are NOT okay. In fact, you are probably in worse shape than you can imagine. You have been ravaged physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, energetically, and in every way imaginable.
The road to recovery is difficult, but it can be done!
Roll up your sleeves, dig deep for determination and some pluckiness, grow your resilience, and do not stop until you are safely on the other side, far out of reach of the madness that is narcissistic abuse.
Here are 12 steps to help you on your journey.
- You may not identify with references to higher power, so please feel free to sub in whatever word you have for the force in the universe that is powerful and greater than you. Summoning its help and trusting its empowering strength can make the recovery faster, easier, and a bit more bulletproof.
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Why are we so destroyed after a relationship with a narcissist? There are many, many reasons, but today, we will look at the top reasons why we are shattered and unable to get off the ground.
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Welcome to Season 5!
The world is in trouble. How do narcissism, sociopathy, and psychopathy inform the new crises that threaten our very existence? We are distracted and have fallen victim to social media and political campaigns, and dark agendas that keep us unaware and too overwhelmed and distracted to do anything about it. The current state of being "woke" is not enough. We must be "woked and stoked" to fix the real extinction-level problems, not just the politically correct problems. That will require some getting dirty.
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In efforts to create a new, gentler language that reflects rehabbed ideas about inclusivity, we take a look at what it means to be neurodivergent. Last episode of season 4.
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Our furry little rodent friends teach us quite a bit about narcissists. Let's scurry on over to a comfy spot with a nice piece of cheese and learn some valuable things from the RAT.
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The Covid virus has quite a bit in common with your narcissist. They are both potentially deadly, difficult to accept, even harder to recover completely, and will change your life. We must be strong and summon the courage and determination to get past all of these challenges because there is happiness on the other side.
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Let's begin with contact info.
-
narctroopers.com
-
Narc2Thrive@gmail.com
Today, we talk about how little the world at large understands what has happened in the aftermath of a relationship with a person with narcissistic personality disorder.
So much misunderstanding, misinformation, cluelessness. NPD is growing, and we all need to understand it. Spread the word!
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The moral fabric of our world has not simply been torn, it has been ripped to shreds and turned into party confetti for hedonistic revelers to fornicate upon. The narcissism that runs rampant in a world gorged on porn and fat on promiscuity is rampant and growing exponentially. Forever love between two committed partners is quickly becoming obsolete. If you think it's just a moral choice, you're wrong. The very survival of the human species is predicated on the successful pairings of man and women who build a nest to raise their young. People reject that status quo and prefer to nest with multiple partners or remain single forever. We should be worried.
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2021 is rapidly ending and with it a tough and scary year. But as 2022 opens up and things look increasingly uncertain, we all need to buckle up and dig in to fortify ourselves for the work ahead. With that being said, the work we do to extricate ourselves from our narcissist is the work we must do first before we can help others. Like putting on the oxygen mask first in a plane or putting on an asbestos suit before entering a burning building. We save ourselves so we can rescue other victims. So after seeing all the red flags and ending up paralyzed in a dream bubble of delusion, it is time to snap out of it and face the reality that demands our attention. And yes, the narcissist is like your heroin or cryptonite of whatever poison you can imagine. It is lethal. It will kill you. You must let them go and cleanse any trace of them. As 2022 begins, we have hard work to do. . . but I think we can do it. Let's go, guys!!
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Narcissists are predators in every sense of the word, and while there are many types of predators out there, the one that resonates with me the most is the spider. There are so many similarities in the way they seduce, trap, paralyze, then devour that it is a chilling image indeed. If you're having trouble letting go, try this aversion therapy idea and picture them as a giant spider.
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People with NPD are history revisionists. They rewrite the past to fit their narrative and completely erase you as if you never existed. This complete annihilation of you and your whole time together is the worst infliction of dehumanizing anguish, existential crisis, and identity destruction that exists. It's as if they have denied your existence on every level and you no longer exist. You are invalidated and forgotten. There is no worse fate.
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Following the relationship with a person with MPD, a feeling of closure is some thing that everyone wants but a few people get. Closure is some thing that you will have to give to yourself because the narcissist will not allow you to have it. Without this feeling of acceptance and resolution, healing and recovery may sputter to a stop. That is why it is so important that we learn how to achieve it without their help.
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New brain science and neurobiology have found revolutionary conclusions about what happens to the victim of narcissistic abuse. They have discovered that the brain is synced with the narcissist and little memory or control happens after that. It's like being abducted by aliens or slipping into a coma. That time is lost. Gone. And it's like you just vanished and left everyone behind. It's time to take back your power. Understanding what happened to your brain is an important first step.
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People will not understand why you stayed. But it is not what they think. There are so many complex reasons we stayed with the partner with NPD. We did not choose it. Something greater than ourselves chose it. And now that we are back on earth and grounded in reality once more, we realize that we were gone all that time. Lost to something that wasn't even real. How did it happen? We need to know.
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The shocking reaction when people with NPD face the discrepancy between an ideal view of the self and a drastically contrasting realization. They collapse. They disintegrate. But just when you think they have been destroyed, just like the villain in Terminator who reconstructed himself after all attempts to kell him, the person with NPD resembles themselves, a newer 2.0 version of themselves who has a shinier mask and facade to cover the empty space within.
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Life with a malignant narcissist is like being at a theme park: fun and excitement until the park closes. After dark, it transforms into a creepy place where the narcissist shows you what is behind all the smoke and mirrors. You won't like what you see and what he says. It has the power to kill you. Let's remember, he's done it before when he murdered his true self. Could you be next?
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Today's episode discusses the idea of needing someone else to complete you, validate you, take care of you. The truth is that if you want to truly end PTSD symptoms and achieve complete freedom from your narcissist, you must become independent, determined, and introspective. You must get to the systemic cause or root of the problem. By turning inward and looking at the source, you can recover and begin living again.
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My narcopath husband was a teacher for nearly 10 years. In fact, we were both teachers and even taught in the same school for a while. As educators, we continued to teach each other things outside the school day. I taught him how to be cultured and refined and academic. He taught me how to enjoy life in the moment with another person, something I had failed to achieve before he came along.
But through the many years, the lessons got harder. And in the end, they were the most savage and brutal lessons a person could ever be expected to learn. It was a transformative, life-altering experience. Am I better for it? I miss the fantasy and intensity of the extravaganza, and reality is pretty harsh and painful these days. But maybe living in a bubble of mutual psychosis is unstainable.
And maybe it was my chance to finally unpack the buried trauma I had carried all my life.
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Some will say that people with NPD/ASPD are pure destruction. Others will say they are simply a catalyst for change and improvement, an opportunity to finally address the issues within. You decide. Maybe it is both?
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The victim of a person with NPD or psychopathy is not a fool. They are a kind, trusting, hopeful soul who probably has a few unresolved issues that make them a little more vulnerable than the average person, but they are not stupid or foolish by any definition. The true fools are the people who refuse to consider that recover from such a catastrophic relationship in no way resembles a regular period of grief and recovery. For this reason and countless others, everyone needs to have a solid understanding of this dynamic and the aftermath that follows.
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This podcast explores polyvagal theory and ways to calm the parasympathetic nervous system which must be regulated in order to avoid mental, emotional, and physical maladies that result from a constant state of hypervigilance.
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“Stars are beautiful, but they may not take part in anything, they must just look on forever.” Please remember, they are not part of this world. They ride on the wings of butterflies we’re all in the imagination comes to life. They can never be part of your world, not even if they tried. They stand outside the intimate world of adults who know how to be real. They are always on the outside looking in.
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Recovery is a long road back, but remembering the 12 rules of reality will help you on your way. Pos them, listen to them daily on your way to and from work, memorize them, chant them while doing a dance around a fire. Whatever you do, believe them and set yourself free.
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Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a trauma induced neurobiological, physiological brain disorder that impairs the narcissist's ability to lead a healthy, happy life. Let's take a look inside the head of a disordered person with NPD and how it affects them.
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Join me for an in-depth look at the two stages of recovery following a relationship with a narcissist, sociopath, psychopath or any combination thereof. Full 1 hour 15 minute deep dive. If you are in recovery, in crisis, or just preparing an exit strategy, please listen and repeat as often as necessary! This is an honest, close look at what you will need to get through if you want to get free, healed, and in control of your own life!
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Recovery is tough enough, but when you are older, it is oh so much harder. But don't despair! We can get through this with the right mindset, some faith in something bigger than all this, and a deep understanding and acceptance of what the narcissist never was and never can be.
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So many things about people with NPD are absolutely unbelievable! Never have I ever seen anything like it. Come along and let's take a look at what is so unusual about these disordered people.
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The person with NPD, ASPD, and psychopathy is a walking contradiction, shape-shifter, chameleon. He/she is part irrational delusion, part magical unicorn, and part Machiavellian. Tou cannot win with these disordered people. There is no winning. Beware.
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If you are the partner of a person with NPD, you most likely serve as their proxy parent, allow them to recreate childhood dynamics, and will be the recipient of punishment and even torture as a result. Sometimes, we allow the narcissist to parent us as well. It is a complex set of mutually beneficial yet mutually lethal dynamics.
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Do you want to truly understand what goes on in the mind of a dysregulated, maladapted, personality disordered malignant narcissist? This episode will bring you one step closer.
Let's unpack these 4 fundamental features of the impaired brain:
Splitting, Dissociation, Confabulation, & Snapshotting.
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After two years of trying to disconnect from my narcissistic psychopath, and after much research and testimonials on the subject, I have cleaned six different things you can do to get to the place where you can achieve freedom, independence, and full recovery. We are all trying to get there. . . the place where there are no fux given.
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Join us as we interview Sandy from Virginia, as we discuss the use of porn and the culture of misogyny that exist in our culture today. Following 12 years of narcissistic abuse, Sandy has become an activist to enlighten everyone about the dangers of trauma from relationships with people with NPD, the cultural epidemic of pornography, and the misogynistic systemic issues that manifest this plague. Please see these resources: https://www.culturereframed.org
https://endsexualexploitation.org
https://considerbeforeconsumingpodcast.com
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This episode is a deep dive into the social ramifications of the growing legions of people with narcissistic personality disorder, a SPD, and psychopathy who are in positions of power and control throughout the world. Understanding and possessing a deep understanding of these dynamics will enable you to empower yourself in the growing epidemic of a world without ethics or compassion.
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We live in a world that is rapidly shifting. It’s as if we are trying to give birth to some thing and experiencing those pains. Many of the changes or not good ones. And the number of narcissist in our world that pray upon the vulnerable is growing exponentially. How do you avoid getting in snared by a narcissist? And what is it exactly that makes us human? We need to keep these things in mind as we move forward.
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Did you know that trauma can change your cell structure at the DNA level? Did you know that babies can be programmed in the womb by trauma? A relationship with a narcissist or a psychopath is not one of simply emotional or physical abuse. It affects you on a cellular level and changes you forever.
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There are indisputable, absolute truths about narcissists and psychopaths and the inevitable outcome of relationships with them. I am compelled to speak a few truths to illuminate it all and document the future for my replacement.
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A break up following a regular typical relationship may take anywhere from a few months two a year or longer. But recovery from a relationship with a narcissist sociopath, or psychopath is a completely different kind of recovery experience. There are many factors that exist in these healing journeys that do not exist following the typical breakup. They may become stuck or hit a wall. And it is difficult to ascertain the way forward.
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The recovery from Narcissistic and Psychopath abuse can be an arduous journey to say the least. I stepped into an ant hill and several tenacious little buggers latched onto my foot. The pain and indignities that followed exemplify the challenge that is before us. There are so many different things at play during a difficult recovery such as this. Emotional thinking can get in the way of cognitive thinking. Reconciling the head and the heart is no easy task. But they can’t love us, so we must let them go and try to learn how to fend for ourselves.
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10 tips on how NOT to raise a narcissist. But first, a look at a decaying culture of decadence and ego that contributes to a society that is a perfect incubator for the development of the narcissist. We examine how women are groomed to become fresh meat for the hungry predator. A world of users who exploit, manipulate, use and abuse and then discard in the name of self-preservation.
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The wisdom of Henny Penny seems to fit these days. The sky really is falling and is tumbling down all around us. And for those of us who are trying to get back on our geet after a nuclear bomb was dropped on our heads, well, it is a little much. But the similarities between the way the world seems to be unravelling from the inside out and the way that the fabric of our lives was completely destroyed is actually quite similar. The way we all get through this and survive is to first acknowledge what has happened and accept the reality of what that means. It means there is no turning back. Only forward. And we march forward with courage and creativity, with faith and a mosral compass to direct us. That's how we might survive.
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There are three categories of personality disorders on the DSM chart of mental disorders. Named Cluster A, B, and C, we take a look at each category and zoom in on the most talked-about type in recent days. There seems to be a new awareness of these dysregulated, maladapted individuals, and that is welcome news. Cluster A is known for some degree of delusion or psychosis, cluster B for its anti-social lack of empathy or remorse, and Cluster A is the fear and anxiety group. You know the ones who are the "Cluster of Chaos," the notorious Cluster B. We will zoom in for a closer look at these Bad Boys of personality disorders.
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Following abuse from a disordered individual like a narcissist or psychopath, there comes a tipping point where everything crumbles. It happened so suddenly after striking a perfect balance for such a long time. Going and going only to collapse upon itself. If we want to live, we must let them die. This podcast incorporates the works of Joan Didion along with one of the best poems of the 20th century. It is prophetic. The task that both the survivor and the citizen of the world must do at this time in history. We must release the past.
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While there are distinguishing features that separate the narcissist from the psychopath, there are many overlapping common traits much like in a Venn Diagram. Not all people with narcissistic personality disorder are psychopaths,; however, all psychopaths are narcissists. The person with NPD is made while the psychopath is born that way. Let's take a look at how many share a blended pathology that is important to understand. You want to know what you are dealing with, right?
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As Survivor Tina came to terms with narcissism and realized the abuse she was enduring, she was finally able to leave the relationship. Healing for Tina has turned into a passion to create jewelry for Survivors. “11:11, Messages of Hope from Angels” is a non-profit endeavor whereby Tina helps a Survivor design a piece of jewelry specific to their path of healing and then finds an Angel Sponsor to pay for the piece. If you are a Survivor and would like to design a piece or would like to be a sponsor, please contact Tina on her IG @tinareel1111.
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Today, we have a little fun with the comparison of a sea creature who can amputate parts of their own body and re-generate a new improved version in its place. I expressed my desire to possess the same skill in suffering the disease and contaminated parts of myself that have been devoured by the narcissist or sociopath, and replacing it with a whole and healthy new version of myself. Wishful thinking. This little tongue in cheek illustrates our need for healing.
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The condition of being naked is a powerful and complex idea. Metaphorically it can mean a sense of vulnerability or honesty. On another level it can create humiliation, embarrassment, and the kind of vulnerability that makes us powerless. The idea of being naked in relationship terms with a cluster B disordered Narcissist or Psychopath is a phenomena unlike any other.
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Forgiveness is a tricky thing. It is complicated, and for a time, it may be completely out of reach. Can we hold people responsible for their sins against us and others if they are mentally dysregulated and impaired? Should we simply pity them? What can we do to be at peace with what has happenned? So many questions and no perfect answers or absolutes.
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What happens when sweetness turns out to be poison? Sweetness is a highly valued quality in our world, and the narcopath has adapted, assimilated, and learned how to be sweet as cherry pie with ice cream on top.
After a brief digression about assigning labels, the value of sweetness is examined and the qualities that are truly important are identified:
moral virtue, loyalty, steadfastness, honesty, transparency, commitment, self-sacrifice, generosity, fidelity, devotion, courage.
These are the things that matter the most.
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Learned helplessness paralyzes recovery after abuse from a Cluster B partner. It is a dynamic that happens slowly over the course of a relationship with a narcopath that is a total erosion of your ability to be a self-actualized, whole, and complete individual. You come to depend on the narcopath for all cues and behaviors and responses. You depend on them to be the only source of your existence and survival. They take away all of your power until you are a raw, defenseless, helpless, incapable mess. You are not helpless, and your only chance of freedom from this nightmare is to assert your ability to be a complete individual without the need to attach or become addicted to external people or things.
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The narcissist psychopath is a murderer, and more importantly, they have already murdered themselves. The only way you can be free is to ceremoniously "kill" them (not literally in real life). One good kill deserves another. And by putting them in their rightful place, you can carry on as the widow (er) you actually are.
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The narcopath uses sex to get supply (fuel) and to control. They do not see you as a human being but as an object and as a way to get what they need. They may appear charming and kind and polite depending on what type of narcissist they may be and the degree of sociopathy or psychopathy which is present, but it is all a false persona. The real person who is rockin' your world is dead inside. So completely and utterly absent that they are ghosts, vampires, wizards who only feel human when they take your life force. You may be blown away by their sexual skills, but if you pay close attention, you will know something does not feel quite right. Intimacy is faked and feels strange. Listen to your intuition. These disordered individuals are incapable of ever being real. Think Pinnochio or Tinman. They are not real.
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Childhood trauma can create a toxic script and faulty programming that follow that child forever. We tend to reconstruct dynamics in adulthood that mimic the ones we had as children. Let’s take a look at the three different categories of personality disorders and how each of them have reacted in a maladaptive, dysfunctional way to their childhood wounding.
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You have loved a narcissist or sociopath.
You have been discarded.
Annihilated. Cast aside. Jettisoned. Thrown away. Expelled. Catapulted. Destroyed. Expunged. Erased. Pushed over the cliff.
You get the picture.
And once you find yourself lost in the Boggy Marshes and the Howling Wilderness, you must find your way out before you become an immortal lost soul.
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Disordered individuals with Cluster B disorders like narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), anti-social personality disorder (sociopaths), psychopaths, and borderlines (BPD) all have overlapping characteristics that define their illness and serve as red flags to mark their mental impairment. If you are involved with one of them, I am sure you have witnessed these 4 manipulations. If you are just trying to figure it all out, watch for these. All of them do it like they all have the same playbook and follow it to the letter. When you see these manifestations of their illness, beware! They are warning signs that need to be noticed and interpreted.
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When recovering from narcissistic (or sociopathic/psychopathic) abuse, it is important at some point to turn away from the dysregulated partner and turn inward to heal and become whole. A critical part of that healing comes from work done with the wounded, injured child within. It may seem like an insurmountable task, but it is a necessary one. Give her(him) space and time to tell you what they need. It will be the most meaningful friendship you ever have.
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Why are you must die for them. A partnership with a personality disordered narcissist always has an expiration date. The only way that it can end is with your death, either metaphorically or literally. We will discuss the dead mother syndrome and the reasons why the narcissist must demand this sacrifice.
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What are the three things that all narcissists )NPD) and sociopaths (ASPD) MUST have in order to survive? 1. Fuel 2. {erks & Benefits 3. Character Traits
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When we understand the insatiable hunger within, we can achieve wholeness. When we befriend our inner child and nourish him/her, we can achieve healing. Abuse from a disordered partner with a Cluster B disorder (narcissism, sociopathy, psychopathy) wll create a trauma induced reaction that can only be addressed by self-partnering and learning to parent our own inner child.
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There are many reasons why establishing a successful no contact regime following trauma from a relationship with a narcissist or sociopath, but it is one of the single most important things t implement if you want to get free and recover. We talk about ways to achieve success and how to self-partner for wholeness and healing.
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Join us on January 9th 1:00-3:00 for our live workshop called Warrior's Path to Wholeness.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bV0Kduu6kIs
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Teahna is my guest today as we discuss the different parts of the person that must heal after the trauma and grief following abuse from a relationship with a narcissist, sociopath, or psychopath. Mental health is only one component. Restoring the energetic body is another facet of recovery that cannot be ignored.
Join us on January 9, 2021, from 1:00-3:00 for "A Warrior's Path to Wholeness" https://teahna.com/warriors-path-to-wholeness/
Here we will create a safe space to explore tools to reimagine a life without the need to seek external validation or unhealthy attachments.
Later in the month, Teahna will offer a course to keep you moving in the right direction. https://teahna.com/the-feminine-current
Together, we can accept the past, let it go, find peace with the present, and create a free and beautiful future.
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The narcopath always wears an elaborate and well-constructed mask, yet like Darth Vader, there is nothing with a shriveled, quivering, gelatinous pile of goo at the core--destroyed long ago by the ones who were supposed to love and protect but could not or would not. What do we have to do to break free of this nightmare? Look behind the mask, accept the truth, and let it go.
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Contempt is a primary feature in the narcissistic cycle of abuse. The disordered individual must demonize and shift the blame to their partner so they can play the victim and walk away with their good-guy image intact. They actually believe in their own revisionist history and altered reality. Because they do not have object constancy, their significant source of fuel intimate partner is either painted black or white and out of sight out of mind. Actually, they are completely out of their mind, always down the rabbit hole with magical thinking and no concept of reality. They said they loved you yesterday, but today...they hate everything about you?
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This is how the world ends with a narcissistic sociopath. It comes out of nowhere. You don't know what hit you. And the contempt, hatred, and murderous cruelty are unbelievable. You did nothing wrong, yet they demonize you in the worst ways imaginable, then they often ghost you and disappear like magic.
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Following abuse from a person with a personality disorder like the narcissist or sociopath, the abuse often continues. Whether you escaped or they discarded you, there are ways that you continue to be abused. There is only one way to stop the madness.
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NLP is a type of clever conditioning often used by the personality disordered cadre of dysregulated individuals.
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The somatic narcissist weaponizes his body, and sex addiction often manifests as comorbidity. It is a dangerous duo, as deadly as taking your partner by the hand and tumbling headfirst into the Grand Canyon.
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The Narcopath believes that if they are happy, the whole world should sing along.
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The narcopath manufactures a false self in order to survive unbearable trauma and abuse in their early years, and they also create a false belief that they are their own God as they worship their own ego and their own delusions in their alternate universe where they dwell.
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I married a covert somatic mid-range narcissist and stayed with him for 16 years while the world burned down around me. I loved him without boundaries and San Francisco became our Camelot. I had planned to go there my whole life, and now I had a partner who could share the magic with me. But love with a personality disordered person does not ever have a happy ending. This is my story of Love and California and the fairy dust that makes some things impossible to give up.
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Narcissists unconsciously seek to heal the mother wound. The results are often tragic for everyone.
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Recovery following abuse by a personality disordered individual such as the narcissist or psychopath can be a long and arduous process. Many modalities must be explored in order to heal the many damaged parts of the mind body and soul. This trauma and resulting PTSD affects millions if not billions of people per year.
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What if the perfect pandemic isn’t who you’re hoping for? What if it is someone you really need to get to know. Spend some quality time. Show them love and kindness. Look in the mirror. It’s time to do the work to get healthy and whole.
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People with personality disorders like the narcissist may seem too good to be true when they are feeding off of your delicious fuel. But at some point, it ends, and you run dry. Overnight, they become savage butchers who know how to slice and slash their way to the bone when they are ready to devalue or discard and when they suffer a narcissistic injury. Prepare to bleed. It's nothing personal. None of it is really about you. It's just what they have to do. A leopard cannot change its spots, a zebra cannot change its stripes, and these magnificent beasts cannot change the fact that they are the most deadly animals in the jungle.
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Following a relationship with a narcissist or psychopath, there is trauma that forces you to decide. You can allow the former self to die and accept and allow a rebirth or new creation of a new self OR you can do nothing, cling to the past, surrender to your addicted brain and stay stuck in an endless loop of despair and depression. By not choosing, you effectively choose to die.
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The narcissist is an empty vessel and must fill the emptiness with fuel from external sources. This moral deficiency and "lack of being" constitutes a form of evil that may make them vulnerable to entity possession. We examine what is at the core of a narcissist and how dispelling the demonic influence cannot be achieved without their participation and consent, and it will not heal them or be enough in the end. They are hollow and must acquire a false self, large amounts of fuel, and magical thinking that allows them to live in a world of illusions. . . always convinced that they are the good guy and they are the victim.
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The traumatic relational experience that causes recovery from narcissistic abuse to be so difficult can be overcome by channeling the power of love through God energy and light. It can be healing to repeat affirmations about love and your need to turn inward for answers, not look to external forces outside yourself for validation or to complete you. Practice this meditation twice a day and add your own affirmations. Habits like this can really speed up recovery and set you free.
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Rob Brown is my guest today from the Lonestar Music Fest podcast series and flips the script by interviewing me. We discuss N.A.R.C. and Narc Troopers including the mission and the history of the work.
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Some types of narcissists weaponize courtesy, charm, and charisma to achieve their single-minded goal of receiving fuel in the form of attention, adoration, validation, etc... In many ways, they are like the blind man on the beach. There is a lesson to learn here that might just help you see things more clearly yourself.
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Nihilists believe that life has no true meaning or purpose, there is no true moral imperative, and that God does not exist. The narcissist believes that meaning is what they design, there is no right or wrong or moral compass, and that they are God.
Let's examine these ideas and use them to help ourselves break the addiction to these sick and disordered Cluster B partners.
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Using the elements to ground yourself during times of stress, anxiety, or sadness has been a common practice that spans all times and cultures. This grounding meditation brings in the energy of earth, water, wind, and fire to settle the spirit and power up your core energy flow for feelings of relaxation and empowerment.
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Love is everything. When healing from trauma, PTSD, abandonment, addiction, insomnia, attachment issues, emotional dysregulation, and excessive rumination following narcissistic/sociopathic relationship abuse, focusing on energy, divine light, and the restorative power of LOVE can help you manage the pain.
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The "trauma brain" is dysregulated and a tremendous source of pain and despair following abuse from a Cluster B disordered partner. The mind and the body have been annihilated on so many levels. We examine the science behind it and look at my personal experiences to illustrate the phenomena.
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Narcissists , sociopaths, and psychopaths often have co-morbidities such as addiction, and one of the most common is drug addiction. They love to push boundaries, break rules, and make their own code to live by. Hallucinogens are a popular accompaniment to anti-social personality disorder. If that weren't enough, they also live in a delusional world of illusion, projection, and deflecting that cause them to lose touch with reality and indulge in a false self that is only real to them.
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The first few 7-8 minutes offer an explanation on the benefits of meditation following emotional trauma and abuse, and the last 20 minutes offers a guided meditation to phelp you on your recovery journey. If you'd like more healing resources, visit my website www.narctroopers.com
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Understanding the brain is key to recovery following emotional and psychological trauma following a relationship with a narcissist, sociopath, or psychopath. In fact, they can murder your brain. Healing the brain and learning to manage it is super important.
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June 18th is the 1-year anniversary of the "discard'" when my ex-husband with narcissistic personality disorder kicked me to the curb. I have suffered the worst year of my life and am actually a bit surprised that I survived at all. He recently denied that he has NPD even though he admitted it the day he discarded me suddenly and ruthlessly. My long term therapist who also saw him confirmed the diagnosis years ago, but I did not listen. Now, I pay for that every day. A recovery from narcissistic abuse looks nothing like a regular divorce or disengagement. The trauma is consuming and life-threatening. The advice of the day: "When you know, you go."
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ST Rappaport is Relationship Photographer, Creative Journal Expressive Arts Coach, founder of Genius Relationships and host of the LifePix Relationships Podcast. After observing, listening, and connecting with so many couples, ST is on a mission to find out what makes relationships work and how they can become extraordinary and is here to help as many couples as possible.
We discuss CJEA is a technique that uses creative endeavors and non-dominate hand exercises to guide clients toward resolving the issues that the inner child holds in the body.
For your free mini session, go to LifePixRelationships.as.me
Link to other therapists and more information: LuciaC.com
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The world is a dangerous place. In the summer of 2020, there are several things that could actually kill you. The global pandemic is worsening in many places and is far from over as people rush out to enjoy the reopening of everything after months of quarantine fatigue. Then there are riots and civil unrest following centuries of systemic racism and inequality that make it unsafe and even lethal to go to the grocery if you are brown or black. Let's also throw in climate change and a killer hurricane season with what looks to be an economy teetering on the brink of collapse. One helluva time to be alive, right? But wait, there's one more thing. Yep, you guessed it...oh you know me so well. The narcissist with a personality disorder who is the ultimate predator, beautiful but a deadly predator nonetheless. Sometimes, they actually kill their victims, but as we all know, there are many ways to die and many ways to murder someone. They are experts at destroying you so completely that there is nothing left but ashes and a few bone fragments. Not for the faint-hearted, Cluster B personality disordered predators are masters of annihilation and then blame you for forcing them to destroy you then erase all memory that you ever existed at all.
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A mirage is not real, and neither is the narcissist. The 3 stages of narcissistic abuse are idealization, devaluation, and discard. In the first stage, seduction is a powerful hurricane filled with an intensity that binds you to the narcissist in ways that tie you to them forever. They need your fuel, and the only way to be sure you lavish them with gushing delicious fuel is to seduce you and take ownership of their new supply. You may be thinking, "It will be different with me. I will tame him, fix him, save him, change him, etc..." Think again. You will not come out of this alive. The euphoria and bliss at the beginning will not be worth the thousand deaths you will experience at the end. One word of advice. RUN.
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Interview with guest Shane from the land down under with the ocean at his doorstep and the infamous annual penguin parade. His experience in a long marriage with a partner suffering from NPD illustrates how narcissism is a global epidemic with deadly fallout. Shane discusses the dynamics of life with a narcissist and the road to healing after an unexpected and brutal discard.
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People with narcissistic personality disorder create a false self and live in an illusion, an imaginary world filled with magical thinking. They are incapable of authenticity, intimacy, and real human emotions. They are often quite skilled at creating a false self, but sooner or later the mask slips off and the true composition of the narcissist is revealed. It is a devastating moment that will be imprinted on you forever, but we must accept reality and be careful to stay firmly grounded in it.
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Trauma is not just a mental or emotional phenomenon. It can be stored in the body over years, even decades. Understand how it works and how to release it so you can have freedom from repetitive destructive patterns. It gives a whole new meaning to baggage, and it must be unpacked and put away once and for all.
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The road to recovery after a relationship ends with a narcissist or psychopath is filled with crazy ups and downs, victories and defeats. People often say, "Healing is not linear." I know I have battled with my best effort to stay alive and put myself back together, better than before. But sometimes, we do some crazy stuff. This triggering tale tells of my post discard decision to remove the parts of my body that he oh so delicately tortured me with. But it was torture and abuse and shame and degradation and hurt. The surgeon's knife was so much less painful than the way my narcopath carved me up. Needless to say, there is quite a bit of regret and a warning to everyone not to jump out of the plane without a parachute.
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People with personality disorders cannot take care of others when they become sick or injured or acquire a disability. Let's explore the top 10 reasons they cannot take care of you, then discuss how impactful this can be in a relationship with a narcissist, sociopath, or psychopath.
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We are witnessing an epic opportunity to let go of a toxic past and embrace a new reality that is healthier and holds more promise and potential than the last. This is happening in the current global transformation as well as with the recovery experience after a narcissistic relationship. Getting there is no picnic. There will be grief as we release that which is broken and fear of a future without it. But if we can hold on, life can be better. A new 2.0 version of economic, political, health systems and more. . . and a new improved version of life without the narcissist offering false promises and empty love.
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Teahna is a survivor of narcissistic abuse, an energy worker, and a healing facilitator. Coming to us originally from California and most recently from Maui, Hawaii, Teahna brings her experience and gifts to the discussion of recovery. We examine how energy work is often a necessary component of a fully developed recovery program. She comprises one of my own teams who has worked to piece me back together after a brutal narcissistic discard in June 2019. I have much gratitude and respect for her work since I have personally benefited from it. You may contact her at www.teahna.com
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Being discarded by a partner with a personality disorder like narcissism or psychopathy is a degrading and humiliating experience that will take years to fully process and overcome. It tears away at the very fabric of your reality and destroys you in ways that you cannot imagine. Victims must reject victim status and fight to reclaim some sense of normality and well being.
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Welcome, Stephanie from Austin, Texas. You may contact her at Cactus Bloom Healing Alternative & Holistic Health Service on Facebook or Instagram. Her healing modalities can guide and support the recovery process following abusive relationships and assist in the integration and healing of childhood programming that may not be serving your highest good. Website: http://www.austinhealingcollective.com/
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Misty is a survivor of domestic abuse and advocates for women who are victims of domestic violence. Doing outreach from her home in Alabama, we can see how the challenges to recovery and freedom are difficult regardless of geographical location.
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The relationship between demonic influence and mentally disordered individuals has been a subject of exploration for years. My husband allowed dark forces to come in, not consciously choosing it, but by passively allowing it due to impure intentions and narcissistic personality disorder. I was surprised that it could infect me through him, but it did.
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My narcopath Ex-Husband and I share a bond that enables us to share energy and thoughts with over 1000 miles between us. I am an empath and pick up these things easily, and he is a dysregulated, maladapted person with a personality disorder and powers that are substantial. But the crossroads that we both discovered simultaneously last week are not the only message here. As a planet undergoing transformation, we are all at a crossroads. We can choose to do better or to continue a downward spiral. The clock is ticking.
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The smear is the inevitable follow-up to the discard at the end of a relationship with a narcissist/sociopath/psychopath. They use it to blame shift and name themselves the one and only true victim.
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The parallels between an empath and a supernova are undeniable. A comparison of the life of a star to that of an empath who is in love with a person with a personality disorder.
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We all have thought about this at one time or another. Who do we want beside us if the world were coming to an end? My husband unexpectedly discarded me nine months ago. It is March 31, 2020, and I face the current pandemic and possible end of my life alone. Completely alone. Life continues day by day, and the silence and solitude can be unbearable. Think about the person you plan to stand shoulder to shoulder with through any apocalyptic event. If they are a narcissistic sociopath, they will save themselves and leave you for dead. Be careful who you believe in. Listen to your intuition. . . you know what they are.
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The nasty little buggers that linger after narcissistic abuse are deeply embedded in every nook and crannie, and it will require a strong pesticide to kill the virulent pestilence that infects the victim. It is important to identify the culprit for what it is and exterminate it. More deadly than imaginable, you must defeat it if you hope to have a full recovery.
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Regardless of the source of your pain whether it comes from a relationship with an abusive and dysregulated partner or loss and fear from the aftermath of Covid-19, what we need most is strength, trust, and faith that comes from a higher power.
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While life-threatening events can bind people together, for those who are recently single and recovering from relationship trauma, a crisis and subsequent isolation can feel exceptionally lonely and difficult.
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An intimate look at my story and the trauma bonding that has kept me tethered to my covert narcissist ex-husband for the past nine months since he suddenly discarded me. Perhaps my experience and insight can give validation and hope to those experiencing a similar struggle and also serve to educate their friends and family about the need to support those who have been trauma bonded to abusive, brainwashing conditioning at the hands of a narcissist or sociopath who may or may not understand the cycle of their own dysfunction.
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People are so hung up om what serves them and so determined to get rid of anything that does not "serve them." What a ridiculous and shallow way to live. Whatever happened to forever love and forever family? You do not discard them like the weekly trash. In the end, that attitude will leave you empty and alone.
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Narcissistic injury inevitably happens and results in cold fury experienced by the covert narcissist, but their final discard allows survivors the opportunity to create a life that is free of dysfunction and unlimited in possibility.
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I am a love junkie. And on the road to recovery, I am on the lookout for pink clouds that will impede my sobriety and hinder my progress. Why the gritty inner work is necessary, even when the pink frothy, fluffy yumminess calls to us.
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What is it like to be raised by a father with a narcissistic personality disorder, and how can someone overcome childhood wounding to become a whole and healthy adult?
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You were famished, and I fed you. You grew strong, then you devoured me.
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Ever wonder what is going on inside the head of a narcissist or sociopath? The way their brain interacts with the world around them is both sublime and horrific. They are both gifted exceptional intuitive humans who spread joy & bliss and also dangerously remorseless, amoral destroyers without emotional empathy or mercy for their victims. They sleep differently, dream differently, and even possess superhuman abilities that separate them from the rest of us.
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I have provided 12 suggestions to help ypu heal from a narcassistic relationship. I hope you find something helpful to you.
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After a relationship with a cluster B individual (narcopath- narcissist-sociopath), the road back to wholeness and wellness is treacherous and agonizing. There are things that might make it easier like routines, emergency go-to strategies, and repurposed mindsets. Let's take a look at some of the things that can help.
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Today we talk to Amy in Austin, Texas who shares her experience with divorce court and the aftermath following the final end of her 26-year marriage to a person with a narcissistic personality disorder.
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Brain chemistry plays an enormous role in addiction, trauma bonding, and relationships with a person with narcissistic personality disorder. Learning how to manage it is an important part of recovery.
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We made it to a new decade of hope and healing for ourselves and the planet. In the spirit of new beginnings, I share 5 intentions I bring forward to 2020. Creating the best version of ourselves possible is no easy task. May we all experience great success and abundance, and when we fail, just get up and get on. We will eventually arrive at our destination.
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People mean well, but you just can't tell them the truth. Admitting the truth about a relationship with a NARC is like admitting your car is out of oil.
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This episode offers a tool for self healing brought to you by B.Emery. It is a tool that she developed on her healing journey. It brings awareness to your natural traits that attract narcissistic people to you. Try it, it's pretty enlightening. Peace and love
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B. Emery shares a recovery technique that enables individuals recovering from abuse to lay their pain to rest. The letter to the offender is written for therapeutic benefit but never actually sent. It worked for her, so perhaps you can add it to your recovery toolbox.
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Recovering from narcissistic abuse is no easy task. It is important to move through the phases of healing so that you do not become stuck and fail to move on and be free from the pain. It is possible to claim survivor status and eventually get to the thriving stage if you know what to look for and give it the time and attention it deserves.
Do you have a recovery tip to help others navigate this tough journey? If so, email me at NARC2Thrive@gmail.com
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Help comes from the most unexpected places. In today's episode, we look at how mind mapping and other techniques can be used to override your brain in ways that can help subdue the ever-present anxiety and potential panic attacks that happen when going through withdrawal from a relationship with a disordered individual. If you would like to share strategies that work for you in calming, grounding, and centering yourself, please share at: NARC2Thrive@gmail.com
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At what point after a breakup do you try to move on with another partner? Will physical intimacy help you detach from the one who broke you when you just can't seem to let them go? This episode explores the idea that we will know when we are ready to begin again and until then, any effort to rush recovery and replace the one we loved and lost will be counter-productive and even harmful in your recovery process. Email us and share your experience at: NARC2Thrive@gmail.com
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There are cyclical patterns in narcissistic abuse: ideation or love-bombing, devaluation, and discard. Without exception, the cycles happen at varying speeds from mere weeks up to decades depending on what type of narcissist or cluster B individual you are in a relationship with. It is crucial to understand these three stages of the relationship even if your narcissist is unaware of them themselves. Only a small percent of narcissists are fully aware of what is happening and understand what they are doing and why they are doing it. In that sense, they are also victims of this relentless and tragic devolution of all of the relationships they will ever experience. Be prepared, have an exit strategy, and,"Once you know, you go." It's the best advice you'll ever receive.
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Welcome to 2020!
My new year's gift to you is 20 affirmations to bring in a new decade of health and happiness. Listen to them as reminders and reassurance as often as you are so compelled. And if you think of new affirmations that I may have overlooked, please email me and I'll add a few here in the notes. Send to: NARC2Thrive@gmail.com
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The covert narcissist is a unique individual who is not like a neuro-typical person nor are they like any other narcissistic personality disordered individual. They are often the most insidious and dangerous of all cluster B dysregulated people. Learn what the red flags are and how to prepare for the ultimate ending in the cycle of narcissistic abuse (idealization, devaluation, and discard).
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Introduction to N.A.R.C. Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Collaborators.
P. Pesqueda and collaborator B. Emery will take you on a weekly journey to understanding, healing, and thriving after experiencing betrayal trauma and abuse from Cluster B disordered individuals (narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths with comorbidities such as addiction).
Join us as we explore topics gathered through rigorous research & deep-dive investigations, conduct interviews with victims/survivors, mental health professionals and other experts, and unpack the top recovery strategies offering a variety of effective methods to navigate to and through recovery.
Stay tuned for an upcoming YouTube video channel, Facebook group, free webinars, and recovery kits. The official website with the N.A.R.C. blog will be live by Valentine's Day, and you may contact us anytime at NARC2Thrive@gmail.com.
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