Real Talk with Rachael Podcast: Recent Episodes
Rachael Gilbert
Real Talk with Rachael is a podcast designed to bring topics out of the darkness and into the light. In each episode, we discuss relevant, engaging and authentic topics to help us get real and live free so we can pursue God-given dreams.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I’m sharing a quick, honest episode about something I’ve been wrestling with - what do you do when God doesn’t seem to be speaking? I’ve been questioning the future of the podcast and feeling that silence - maybe you can relate. Is there an area where God feels distant right now? I’m encouraging you to think back to the last thing He asked us to do, even if it felt small or insignificant. Did you follow through? Maybe He’s still speaking in ways we didn’t expect.
I don’t know exactly what’s next for Real Talk with Rachael, but I do know this: my ministry is just getting started. God is stirring new vision and dreams in my heart, and I’d love for you to be part of the journey.
Make sure you’re subscribed to my newsletter at rachaelgilbert.com
In the #1 spot on Real Talk with Rachael's top 10 countdown, Dana K. White from A Slob Comes Clean kicked off the first episode of 2019 with practical and hilarious wisdom on decluttering. As an author, podcaster, and self-proclaimed "hopelessly messy" person turned decluttering expert, Dana shares her journey of tackling her own home and helping others do the same. She offers realistic tips on managing clutter, from her container concept to simple laundry strategies, and explains how clutter struggles can impact women’s sense of identity. Dana also opens up about how letting others into her mess helped her grow.
In the #2 spot on Real Talk with Rachael's top 10 countdown, I celebrate my parents’ 50th wedding anniversary with my four older siblings. Together, we reflect on the powerful lessons we’ve learned from our mom and dad—one from each kid. From the importance of building a foundation of faith to the power of unconditional love, we share heartfelt (and often humorous) memories of growing up in a family of seven. With plenty of sibling banter, including tales of family vacations, this episode is a sweet tribute to a lasting legacy of love, teamwork, and unwavering faith.
In the #3 spot on Real Talk with Rachael's top 10 countdown, Sandy Jobe shares heartfelt wisdom on marriage, family, and the power of prayer. As a homemaker, author, and Women’s Ministries Care Pastor, Sandy encourages us to embrace gratitude in every season and bring everything—even the little things—to God in prayer. She reminds us that healthy marriages require both partners doing their part, while trusting God to work on the other.
Sandy also highlights the importance of vulnerability in community, warning against the trap of comparison fueled by social media. She encourages being a “change agent” in your marriage by serving your spouse in practical ways and addressing unmet, unspoken expectations. Finally, she shares the value of slowing down and making time to gather at the table—it’s where real connection happens. This week, challenge yourself to pray about the little things you’ve overlooked. Nothing is too small for God’s care.
In the #4 spot on Real Talk with Rachael's top 10 countdown, author Sarah Philpott shares wisdom from her book, The Growing Season: A Year of Down-on-the-Farm Devotions. Using farming as a powerful metaphor, Sarah explains the importance of spiritual rest—just as fallow ground needs time to replenish its nutrients, we need seasons of stillness to restore our souls. She encourages pruning commitments that no longer fit your priorities, even if they’re “good” things, and reminds us that no one is doing it all. Sarah also highlights the beauty of spiritual growth—when the fruit of the Spirit flows more naturally, you’ll know you’re maturing. Whether you’re planting new seeds or finally seeing the fruits of long-term effort, trust that God is working in every season.
This week, ask Him, What area do You want to grow in my life? and What’s my part in that growth? Then write it down—you might be surprised by what He reveals.
In the #5 spot on Real Talk with Rachael's top 10 countdown, Heather Johnson from Revelation Wellness shares powerful insights on finding joy, walking in intimacy with God, and living with intention. She reminds us that loving others starts with being loved by the Father—when we run dry, it’s His love that refills us. Heather encourages us to slow down, sit with God, and let Him minister to us, even when it feels vulnerable. She also highlights that joy isn’t based on circumstances—it’s the atmosphere of God’s kingdom, learned through both sorrow and celebration. Living well takes daily, intentional heart checks—bringing hidden struggles into the light and letting God heal them.
This week, try practicing a two-minute breath prayer and regularly check in with your heart. Let God meet you right where you are.
In the #6 spot on Real Talk with Rachael's top 10 countdown, author Lauren Chandler shares insights from her Bible study, With Us in the Wilderness: A Study of the Book of Numbers. She reminds us that God’s plan has always included women and that even the difficult passages in Scripture reveal His heart for justice and restoration. Lauren encourages us to approach the Bible with prayer and patience, trusting that God’s voice will always align with His character. She also dives into how wilderness seasons—though challenging—are where God recenters our lives around Him. Community is essential in these times, even when past hurts make it hard to trust again. Lauren’s message is full of grace: your wilderness won’t last forever, God is with you in it, and He doesn’t waste a single moment. If you’re feeling stuck, take time this week to pray and ask God, Where are You in this season? And where am I? He’s closer than you think.
In the #7 spot on Real Talk with Rachael's top 10 countdown, Dr. Juli Slattery joins the conversation to share wisdom on marriage, intimacy, and the power dynamics at play in relationships. As a clinical psychologist and co-founder of Authentic Intimacy, Juli helps women understand how to use their influence in marriage in a way that builds up rather than controls. She explains that men thrive when they feel believed in, supported, and encouraged rather than micromanaged. She also dives into how sex is a spiritual battleground—designed by God for deep intimacy but often attacked by fear, shame, and past wounds. Juli encourages couples to pray about their sex life, seek expert help when needed, and fight for their marriage with God’s perspective. She reminds us that healthy conflict is about teamwork, not winning, and that the real battle in marriage is often spiritual. This week, take time to ask God where the enemy may be attacking your relationship and how you can partner with Him to strengthen it.
In the #8 spot on Real Talk with Rachael's top 10 countdown, Rebekah Moes opens up about her personal journey through infidelity in her marriage and how God’s redemption transformed her life. As co-founder of Family of Hope and host of the unFAITHFUL podcast, Rebekah is passionate about helping couples navigate the often lonely road of marital betrayal. She shares valuable insights, including how marriage acts as a mirror—reflecting personal growth areas rather than just pointing out a spouse’s flaws. Rebekah encourages focusing on self-worth and identity rather than blame during tough seasons, reminding listeners that healing is a slow process but begins with just one next step. She stresses the importance of seeking support, setting healthy boundaries, and addressing secrecy in relationships. Her message is clear: while you can’t control your spouse’s choices, you can take steps to protect your heart and find hope in God’s plan for your future, no matter the outcome.
In the #9 spot on Real Talk with Rachael's top 10 countdown, author Gary Thomas dives into the topic of his book Married Sex: A Christian Couple's Guide to Reimagining Your Love Life. Gary shares practical, faith-based insights on how married couples can cultivate a healthy, God-honoring sex life. He emphasizes that sex should be mutually pleasurable, strengthen the relationship, and glorify God—shifting the focus from using your spouse for pleasure to cherishing them through intimacy. Gary encourages couples to identify what might not be working in their sex life, whether it’s physical, relational, or even theological. He reminds us that God designed sex as a gift, celebrated in Scripture, to bring joy, create life, and deepen connection. Addressing common misconceptions—like the idea that sex should always be easy or driven by constant desire—he encourages couples to explore new ways of connecting through all five senses. This conversation is full of grace, wisdom, and practical tips to help couples grow closer, both physically and spiritually.
In the #10 spot on Real Talk with Rachael's top 10 countdown, Lee Strobel joins the conversation to talk about his documentary The Case for Heaven and the journey that inspired it. After a near-death experience, Lee—once an atheist and now a passionate Christian—set out to explore what really happens after we die. He shares fascinating insights about the afterlife, explaining that our souls live on and describing two stages: an immediate spiritual state and a final reunion with our resurrected bodies in heaven or hell. Lee also clears up common misconceptions about hell, noting it’s more about separation from God than fire and brimstone. His research into near-death experiences reveals stories that align closely with Christian beliefs, but he cautions against the idea of contacting loved ones who’ve passed. Lee’s big encouragement? Be courageous in your faith—you won’t regret it! If you’ve ever wrestled with questions about heaven, God, or eternity, this conversation (and the resources Lee offers) is a great place to start.
7 years. 378 episodes. When God gave me the name Real Talk with Rachael at The Declare Conference, I had no idea where it would go. Over the years, I’ve learned so much, but today, I’m sharing 7 lessons from 7 years of podcasting:
- Do not despise small beginnings. The Lord rejoices to see the work begin. (Zechariah 4:10)
- You will be bad at first. That’s OK. Keep going.
- You will want to quit. Remember why you started. (Revelation 2:3-4)
- If God’s anointing isn’t on it, don’t do it. (Deuteronomy 31:8)
- Be faithful with little. Your influence reaches further than you realize. (Luke 16:10)
- Success is obedience. It’s not about numbers; it’s about faithfulness. (Matthew 25:21)
- Permission to pivot. There’s a season for everything, and the best is yet to come. (Ecclesiastes 3)
For the next 10 weeks, I’ll be releasing the Top 10 Most Downloaded Episodes since the start of the podcast. Every Wednesday, a listener-favorite episode will be featured—so stay tuned to see which ones made the list.
Beyond that, I don’t know exactly what’s next for Real Talk with Rachael, but I do know this: my ministry is just getting started. God is stirring new vision and dreams in my heart, and I’d love for you to be part of the journey.
Make sure you’re subscribed to my newsletter at rachaelgilbert.com
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm chatting with the hosts of FamilyLife Today, Dave and Ann Wilson. They are also cofounders of Kensington Church, a national, multi-campus church that hosts more than 14,000 attendees every weekend. Dave and Ann are authors of the book Vertical Marriage: The One Secret That Will Change Your Marriage. The Wilsons live in the Detroit area where Dave served as the Detroit Lions chaplain for 33 years. Dave and Ann have three grown sons, CJ, Austin, and Cody, as well as three daughters-in-law and six grandchildren.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * A "vertical marriage" means putting God first before everything else, including your spouse. When your relationship with God is strong, it overflows into your marriage, helping you love and serve better. * When things feel off, take time to reflect. Both partners shared that repentance—acknowledging their shortcomings before God—was the turning point that softened their hearts toward each other. * Every marriage has peaks and valleys. When you’re at a low point, don't give up. Feelings may fade temporarily, but with commitment and work, love can grow again. * Expecting your partner to meet all your emotional and spiritual needs is setting them (and yourself) up for failure. Only God can fill that role. * Keeping God at the center takes a daily choice. Start each day by surrendering your life, your marriage, and your family to Him. * If you’re stuck in a cycle of conflict or numbness, pause to evaluate your patterns. Are you blaming your spouse or avoiding the real issues? Start breaking the cycle by taking responsibility for your part. * Ask the Big Question, "On a scale of 1 to 10, how are we doing in our marriage?" It’s a scary question, but it’s a powerful way to check the pulse of your relationship. Be prepared to hear the answer without getting defensive. Pray beforehand, and approach it with humility and a desire to grow together. * Real intimacy requires working through the tough stuff—conflict, misunderstandings, and past baggage. You can’t avoid the chaos. Growth happens when you go through it, not around it. * When challenges arise, resist the urge to blame your spouse. Look in the mirror and ask, “What’s my role in this?” True change begins when we own our selfishness and commit to doing the work. * Stepping into hard conversations requires bravery. Even if the answer or response feels uncomfortable, it’s the first step toward deeper connection. * Don’t give up, even when it’s hard. Marriage is a covenant, not just a contract. Seek help when needed—whether it’s through books, counseling, or community support. Remember, you’re building something that not only blesses your marriage but can transform legacies for future generations. * Practical things you can do to strengthen your relationship - Pray Together. Even when you’re angry, praying together can soften hearts. Date Your Spouse: Prioritize regular one-on-one time to reconnect. Ask Honest Questions: Regularly check in with your spouse and genuinely listen. Accountability: Surround yourself with friends or mentors who will challenge and encourage you to grow.
Let’s Get Real Practical: * Abide in the Lord by reading a passage, reflecting on it, responding to it, and resting in it * Emotionally Healthy Relationships Day by Day - Peter Scazzero * When you sit with the Lord, consider having a special meeting place
Resources: RachaelGilbert.com Image Restored
Connect with Dave & Ann: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
In this special episode, I dive into faith as the foundation for transformation. Together, we explore the power of shifting from fear to faith, building spiritual resilience, and taking bold steps toward the life God has called us to live. Through scriptural truths, personal reflections, and practical steps, you'll discover how to let faith move you forward and release the grip of fear and comparison.
We’ll also take intentional moments to pause and process – because growth happens not just in hearing, but in reflecting and responding.
- Faith is the FoundationPause to Process: What’s your foundation? Have you been comparing your faith journey to others?
- Faith Is Not a Formula; It’s a Relationship with Our FatherPause to Process: Who or what have you been comparing your journey to? How can you deepen your relationship with God today?
- Fear Will Cripple Your Faith and Mock Your FuturePause to Process: What has fear been telling you about your future? What is God saying instead?
- Faith Spreads Like FirePause to Process: What are you spreading—faith or fear? Who can you encourage today?
Faith in Action Ideas
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- Pray over your home, your family, and your circumstances.
- Commit to tithing, trusting God to bless your finances.
- Pursue counseling for unprocessed pain.
- Take bold steps in 2025—write that book, start that business, or reconcile relationships.
- Pause to Process: What would “as in heaven” look like in your life in 2025?
Faith Reflections for 2025 * Your “By Faith” Statement: Write down how you will trust God in 2025. Example: By faith, in 2025, I will trust in the Lord with all my heart, throw off shame and comparison, and walk in step with the Spirit. * Hebrews 12:1-3: Meditate on these verses and let them inspire you to run your race with endurance, keeping your eyes on Jesus.
Takeaways and Challenges * Reflect on the questions and prompts in the "Pause to Process" sections. * Share your "By Faith" statement with a trusted friend or mentor for accountability. * Take one bold action this week that reflects your faith in God. * Take the body quiz and pick up a copy of Image Restored
Back by popular demand is our annual Process and Pray. If you’re new here, in December, we spend every Monday morning in a series where we “Process & Pray through the Year.” As a therapist, I believe in the power of pausing and reflecting so we can embrace the present and look forward to the future.
Thus far, we have big praise and bold prayers. Today we are discussing our battle plan.
Process & Pray: * What word did God give me for the year? * What battles did we walk through this year? * What promises has God spoken to me and my family? * God, what word are you giving me for the coming year? * Journal a few verses that God wants you to cling to in 2025
It’s December, which means it’s time for our annual Process & Pray! This series is all about reflecting on the past year, embracing the present, and preparing for what’s ahead.
This week, we’re pausing to praise God for answered prayers and seeking Him for bold, faith-filled prayers. Nothing is too big for God, and He calls us to come to Him with confidence.
Process: * What prayers has God answered this year? Write them down to build your faith. * What am I still praying for? Don’t give up! * “Jesus, what bold prayers do You want me to pray for the coming year?”
Pray: "Jesus, what bold prayers do You want me to pray for the coming year?”
Resource: Grab a copy of my book for yourself, a friend, or a small group to study in 2025. Grab one at imagerestoredbook.com.
We’re kicking off our annual Process & Pray series in today's Talk Therapy episode. Every Monday in December, we’ll create space to reflect on the year, invite God into our journey, and prepare our hearts for what’s ahead.
This week, we’re starting with gratitude by praising God for His goodness and who He is. As you process and pray, consider this question: “Jesus, what victories do you want to remind me of from this year?”
Process: * What victories or breakthroughs came this year? Celebrate even the small ones! * What went well that I want to carry into the new year? (Think about time, relationships, or habits.) * Thank God for these victories out loud. * Share God’s goodness with someone in your life.
Pray: Invite Jesus into your past, present, and future as you reflect on His faithfulness.
Resource: One of my victories this year was releasing my book, Image Restored. If you haven’t grabbed a copy yet, visit imagerestoredbook.com.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael it's the final episode of my church series where we've been engaging in healthy conversations about church and leadership all while keeping our hearts pure in the process. While I'm a licensed professional counselor, I want to be clear that I am not professionally counseling you on this podcast today. My goal is to offer some pastoral counseling by providing you with a system to follow when you're walking through something hard in life through the acronym HEART.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * H - Healthy Order of Processing: Begin with God, seek support from trusted loved ones, consider professional help, and reserve online sharing for last. When you’re working through a past experience or emotion, start by giving yourself space to actually feel it. Many people tend to avoid or suppress their feelings, but there’s strength in feeling and acknowledging our experiences. Sometimes, our bodies even hold onto memories physically, and techniques like EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) can help release those memories without carrying the emotional weight. * E - Examine: Explore personal triggers and trauma responses, understanding their root causes. This promotes healing rather than simply avoiding discomfort. Take time to notice what triggers you. You might feel a reaction in your body, like tension or discomfort, or you may go into “fix it” mode, trying to solve or dismiss the feeling quickly. Start observing your responses and consider how they affect you and those around you. Remember, self-awareness is key, especially if you’re in a leadership role. Being aware of your responses doesn’t disqualify you from being a leader—in fact, it makes you a stronger one. * A - Allow Grief: Acknowledge grief as a natural, non-linear process and permit yourself the time and space to feel a range of emotions. Grief is a complex process full of sadness, anger, confusion, and even moments of joy. It’s okay to allow yourself to feel whatever comes up without judging it or putting it on a timeline. Let yourself enter that space of feeling, knowing that grieving well actually makes you healthier and stronger over time. * R - Repent: Embrace self-reflection, addressing judgment or unforgiveness toward others or yourself. We’re all accountable as the church, not just those in the spotlight. Sometimes we need to turn inward and ask ourselves if we’re carrying judgments or bitterness. This one can be tough, especially when we’re hurt by others or witness people, especially leaders, stumble. It’s easy to point fingers, but true healing and strength come when we’re also willing to reflect on our hearts. This is about keeping our hearts clear and open and taking responsibility for our growth and healing. * T - Take Care of Your Whole Self: Prioritize holistic self-care, including emotional, mental, spiritual, and physical health. Don't forget to tend to all aspects of our well-being—physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual. Life can be so busy that we often overlook self-care, thinking we don’t have time. But creating margin is crucial. That might mean scheduling in time for a walk, a creative outlet, or connecting with friends who “get it.” Find what fills you up and creates space for you to feel grounded.
Let’s Get Real Practical: * Screenshot the HEART acronym from today’s show notes as a reminder * Get a copy of The Care and Counsel Bible * Share this series or a favorite episode with someone who needs to hear it
Resources: The Care and Counsel Bible The Body Keeps the Score You can find a list of Christian counselors at The American Association of Christian Counselors or through Focus on the Family’s Christian Counselor Network.
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm chatting with my friends, Jeff and Terra Mattson. Jeff and Terra are authors of Shrinking the Integrity Gap: Between What Leaders Preach and Live, hosts of the Living Wholehearted Podcast, executive coaches, social entrepreneurs, and proud parents to two girls. Together, they co-founded the counseling and organizational development firm Living Wholehearted and a grassroots movement, Courageous Girls, that helps moms walk with their daughters in every stage of their growing years.
Jeff is also an organizational development specialist, while Terra is a licensed marriage & family therapist and keynote speaker. Whether through their podcast or their professional work, the Mattsons are committed to equipping individuals, families, and organizations to thrive.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Integrity isn’t about achieving perfection; it’s an ongoing, daily commitment to align actions with values. Growth in integrity means recognizing where you fall short and working toward closing that gap. * Leadership isn’t only for executives or public figures. If someone looks up to you—be it a sibling, friend, or colleague—you have a sphere of influence. Embrace the responsibility and impact that comes with it. * Leaders, especially those in high-impact roles, often face challenges in aligning their personal lives with their public personas. Acknowledging this gap is the first step to growth and maturity in leadership. Recognizing when you need help and being quick to seek it doesn’t make you weak; it’s a sign of maturity. Healthy leaders get support to avoid larger issues and continue growing. * Integrity doesn’t mean being flawless. Instead, it involves honestly owning your mistakes, making corrections, and allowing grace for yourself and others. Accepting the inevitability of imperfections allows you to lead authentically. * Trauma is often misjudged as only extreme events, but even smaller disruptions, like frequent moves or emotional challenges in childhood, can leave lasting effects. Leaders should reflect on these potential impacts, as unresolved trauma can influence their leadership style and decision-making. * Saying "no" can be difficult, especially for leaders used to shouldering responsibilities. However, stepping back not only benefits personal health but also empowers others to grow and contribute. Boundaries allow leaders to focus on areas where they can have the greatest impact. * Many leaders carry hidden shame from past experiences or unmet expectations, which can affect how they interact with their team. Recognizing and addressing these feelings—especially those rooted in early life or trauma—can lead to a more authentic and effective leadership style. * It’s crucial to build a sense of self that isn't tied to work or accolades. Leaders who understand their worth apart from external success are often more resilient and fulfilled, fostering a healthier work environment for all. * Neuroscience shows that old neural pathways can be replaced through intentional practices and experiences. Repetition and small, steady changes are essential for rewiring the brain toward healthier beliefs. * Feeling guilt for specific behaviors can be healthy, as it indicates moral awareness. However, ongoing shame (e.g., "I am bad") must be addressed, as it can hinder personal growth and relationships. * Leaders need trusted spaces outside their professional environments to share struggles. Coaches, counselors, or a few close friends outside work systems can offer safety and objectivity. Confidentiality and reciprocity are crucial for these relationships. Healthy leadership involves welcoming correction and feedback, even when it feels uncomfortable. * Leaders often struggle with being vulnerable because they are accustomed to being in control. It’s essential to develop the humility to ask for help and allow others to see and speak into their challenges. * Leaders should prioritize character over charisma to avoid the pitfalls of seeking power or using others to meet personal needs. Systems that prioritize appearances without true accountability often result in harmful consequences. * Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) involves grandiosity, entitlement, lack of empathy, and an image-focused mentality. Research shows narcissism can thrive in church systems because of the platforming of leaders and the absence of accountability structures. Churches need to resist “hero worship” of leaders and remember that Jesus is the only true hero.
Let’s Get Real Practical: * Ask the Lord about the blind spots you're missing * Ask a trust person if they see any blind spots and listen to their feedback * Take the Core Value Index Test * Share the episode with a leader
Resources: Wholehearted Leadership Cohorts Let Us Prey: The Plague of Narcissist Pastors and What We Can Do About It You can find a list of Christian counselors at The American Association of Christian Counselors or through Focus on the Family’s Christian Counselor Network.
Connect with Jeff & Terra: website | Instagram | Facebook | podcast Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I’m speaking with Dr. Josh Zeichik. Josh is the Director of Church Engagement for Focus on The Family. With experience in youth ministry and church planting, he oversees their pastoral ministry, The Focused Pastor. He holds a DMin in Biblical Counseling from Midwestern Baptist Theology Seminary.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Although media coverage of prominent church leader failures affects trust in clergy, not all pastors are leading double lives. Most pastors are sincere in their service to God. * The early church faced similar challenges, with warnings of false teachers and leaders who exploited people. Today, it's not necessarily a rise in such issues but increased awareness. * Every pastor sins, but not every sin is the same. The way the church responds should depend on the severity of the issue, with criminal actions treated differently than personal failings. * When church members experience hurt from pastoral leadership, it can lead to doubt, mistrust, and even cynicism. Doubt is natural, but the Bible encourages believers to remain steadfast in their faith and to show mercy to those struggling. * The term "spiritual abuse" is frequently used, but "sinful pastoral leadership" may be a more accurate term to describe a spectrum of behaviors where pastors either exploit their position for personal gain or fail to live morally according to their teachings. * Just like identifying counterfeit money, we must understand the biblical qualifications for pastors to discern unhealthy leadership. Most qualifications are based on character, not just skills. we often prioritize charismatic speakers, but Scripture highlights the importance of a pastor’s integrity, relationships, and spiritual life. * Pastors must have a structure of accountability, like elders or deacons, who regularly check in on their personal and spiritual lives. Isolated pastors without accountability are in dangerous positions. * It’s important to differentiate between personal preferences and clear sin when dealing with church leaders. Not every disagreement is a sign of sin. * If a pastor refuses to repent privately, there is a biblical precedent for public confrontation. This isn’t gossip but a necessary step when sin is unaddressed. * Congregants need to be in the Word to recognize false teaching. Knowing Scripture personally helps you validate what is taught in the church. We all have a role to play in studying the Bible. Don’t rely solely on Sunday sermons; engage with Scripture personally to grow in faith and discernment. * Even when hurt by leadership, we are called to forgive. Holding onto bitterness can hinder spiritual growth, even if the pastor never seeks reconciliation. * When dealing with victims of pastoral abuse, it's important to start with compassion, just as Jesus showed in Matthew 9. Even if a victim’s reaction may not be Christlike, their hurt is valid and should be acknowledged and heard with patience. * The book of Jude offers vital guidance on addressing false leaders who misuse their authority. We must protect other victims while maintaining a spirit of mercy, and avoiding bitterness or vindictiveness. * Even when justice feels delayed, God remains faithful. Trust that He will bring justice in His timing.
Let’s Get Real Practical: * Don't be afraid to ask good questions * Share the resources at TheFocusedPastor.org * Pray for your pastors
Connect with Josh: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm speaking with Max Lucado. Max is known for combining poetic storytelling and homespun humor with the heart of a pastor. His trade books all begin as sermon series at Oak Hills Church, and his sermons all start with Max asking himself this question: “What can I say on Sunday that will still matter on Monday?” He’s been dubbed “America’s Pastor” by Christianity Today, “The Best Preacher in America” by Reader’s Digest, and the “Ted Lasso of Pastors” by the Dallas Morning News. Max Lucado has penned more than 40 works of adult nonfiction, standing alongside dozens and dozens of bestselling children's books, gift books, Bible studies, commentaries, and collections. His books have been published in 56 languages worldwide and regularly appear on bestseller lists, including The New York Times, Publishers Weekly, and USA Today.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Biblical teachings are meant to prepare, not scare. Focus on preparation, maintaining faith, and trusting God’s guidance rather than being overwhelmed by fear. * Rather than fearing the end times or personal endings, view them as beginnings of something greater. This shift in perspective can bring peace and reduce anxiety about aging or the future. * In moments of fear or uncertainty about the future, trust in God's character and the promise of eternal life by focusing on faith and spiritual growth rather than dwelling on fears. * The concept of the rapture is meant to be comforting, offering hope and healing. Rather than focusing on fears of being left behind, we should see it as a moment of divine reunion and restoration. * The rapture is described as the next major event on God's timeline, where believers will be taken up to avoid the chaos of the tribulation. This encourages believers to live in readiness, keeping faith and trust in God's plan. * The Antichrist will emerge after the rapture, charming people and leading them during a time of chaos. The tribulation is a seven-year period of great suffering following the rapture. During this time, Satan will empower the Antichrist, but there will also be a Jewish revival led by 144,000 evangelists. This calls for believers to be prepared for difficult times while holding onto hope. * Believers should test the teachings they receive, especially regarding end-times prophecy, to ensure they align with Scripture. If something doesn't feel right or biblical, it's okay to set it aside and trust that God will reveal truth in His timing. * Upon death, believers enter paradise, a place of healing and peace, which is like the front porch of heaven. This encourages Christians not to fear death but to view it as a transition to eternal rest and joy. * After the tribulation, Christ will return to reign on earth for a thousand years (the Millennium), followed by a final judgment. Believers will not face this judgment because their sins have been forgiven, reinforcing the importance of faith in Christ. * H - Hang in there: Life's troubles are temporary compared to the eternal glory ahead. O - Overcome pessimism: Fight cynicism, especially with age, and embrace optimism. P - Pray expectantly: Focus prayers not just on personal needs but with the bold hope for Christ's return and greater things. E - Explore eternity: Keep the perspective that this life is temporary, and greater joy and fulfillment are promised in the next.
Let’s Get Real Practical: * Get a copy of Max's book What Happens Next, then share and discuss it with someone * Become familiar with the end times timeline * What's one thing God spoke to you in this episode? Process it by journaling or talking with a counselor
Resources: You can find a list of Christian counselors at The American Association of Christian Counselors or through Focus on the Family’s Christian Counselor Network. Join the Joy Mail community for monthly updates and exclusive resources by visiting RachelGilbert.com and clicking the freebies tab. Be sure to leave a review or share the episode on social media by tagging @RachaelJGilbert for your chance to win a copy of What Happens Next
Connect with Max: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm having a conversation with Dr. Robert Paul. Robert Paul is Vice President of the Focus on the Family Marriage Institute. He is both a marriage therapist and an accomplished speaker who presents regularly at professional conferences and enrichment events both nationally and internationally. He has co-authored six books, including “The DNA of Relationships,” with Drs. Gary and Greg Smalley, and “9 Lies That Will Destroy Your Marriage: And the truths that will save it and set it free,” with Dr. Greg Smalley. He is a former professor at Evangel University where he taught in both the biblical studies and psychology departments, specializing in Marriage and Family Counseling, Human Sexuality, and the integration of faith into all areas of life. Bob and his wife, Jenni, live in Springfield, Mo., have been married for over 43 years. They have four children and seven grandchildren.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Addressing deep-seated desires and achieving relational success offers relief and freedom. * Recognizing and breaking the reactive cycle in relationships can empower individuals to improve their dynamics by understanding and halting predictable conflict patterns. * Group support can provide reassurance that marital challenges are universal and not unique. * Faith and personal transformation, as highlighted by Robert's and his wife's journey, play a crucial role in sustaining relationships. * Utilizing available resources for counseling and self-improvement, such as those mentioned in the episode, can be immensely helpful. * Emotions are morally neutral and serve a purpose in signaling areas needing attention; understanding this helps in better managing them. * The care cycle emphasizes the importance of balancing personal care with nurturing the relationship, leading to healthier interactions. * Practical advice on nurturing oneself and the relationship, including suggestions for summer activities and self-care strategies. * Recognizing the subtleties of negative thoughts and maintaining a 'no losers policy' promotes a healthier team dynamic in marriage. * The need to build trust and address past relationship baggage and family influences for better current interactions.
Let’s Get Real Practical: * Take the Reactive Cycle Assessment * Catch up on previous episodes * Create a summer "being" list
Resources: You can find a list of Christian counselors at The American Association of Christian Counselors or through Focus on the Family’s Christian Counselor Network. Join the Joy Mail community for monthly updates and exclusive resources by visiting RachelGilbert.com and clicking the freebies tab
Connect with Dr. Paul: website Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
If you’ve been around the show long, you might remember that God asked me to lay down the Talk Therapy episodes at the beginning of 2024. However, as I was out for a run the day after my 40th birthday, He dropped a word about finishing with excellence so strongly on my heart that I knew I had to share it with you in this episode.
How do we achieve excellence? To put it into simple words, do the right thing. Excellence is the result of caring about what we do, and of putting our very best effort into what we care about.
Key Verses:
Colossian 3:22-25 (MSG), "Servants, do what you’re told by your earthly masters. And don’t just do the minimum that will get you by. Do your best. Work from the heart for your real Master, for God, confident that you’ll get paid in full when you come into your inheritance. Keep in mind always that the ultimate Master you’re serving is Christ. The sullen servant who does shoddy work will be held responsible. Being a follower of Jesus doesn’t cover up bad work."
2 Timothy 4:7, "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith."
Process:
God, what are you asking me to finish with excellence?
Resource:
If you are not yet in our JOYmail community, I want to invite you to join today. Once a month I send an email with a personal note from me, favorite finds, podcast updates, and a free therapy resource. Go to rachaelgilbert.com and click the freebies tab to join the community.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm chatting with Stefanie and Caleb Rouse. Stefanie and Caleb are dynamic relationship mentors and digital creators passionately guiding singles and couples toward fulfilling and resilient relationships anchored in faith. With their master’s degrees in marriage and family therapy with an emphasis in theology (Stefanie) and in education (Caleb), they offer tailored courses, mentorship, and guidance. These are all rooted in prayer, backed by training in psychology and biblical counseling, encouragement from Christ, and practical strategies for love that lasts. Speaking to an engaged audience across multiple social media platforms, Stefanie and Caleb provide daily insights into the transformative power of faith across all relationship stages. Their vision is a world where we learn to love each other out of God’s abundance of love, leading to impactful and joyous relationships.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Stefanie and Caleb wrote Wholehearted Love for those who have put up barriers attempting to avoid disappointment or getting hurt. At some point, those barriers can spread to our relationship with God and stop us from experiencing His love like we did before. But He wants us to live wholeheartedly - a life where we are fully known, deeply loved, and vibrantly alive. * "Wholehearted" love is all-encompassing. God loves all of you - even the parts you attempt to hide. * When we experience trauma, we can develop the sense that we're not worthy of love. The beautiful truth of Christ is we cannot earn love because it is a gift He freely gives. However, it can be difficult to accept. To move to a place where we can receive love, we must allow God's truth to "rebreak" us into a reflection of His image. * The lies we believe about ourselves can be deep-rooted and painful. Many of these lies are based on the responses of the people around us, so if the pain becomes too much, we may choose to hide behind a mask that ultimately isolates us, rather than engaging in vulnerability that would lead to fostering healthy relationships. * You can retrain your negative thought patterns by engaging with God's Word as a habit. Express gratitude, start small, and ask for the Holy Spirit's guidance.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Take the Reactive Cycle Assessment and share it
Connect with Stefanie: website | Instagram Connect with Caleb: website | Instagram Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm speaking with the authors of Pastors' Wives Tell All: Navigating Real Church Life with Honesty and Humor, Stephanie Gilbert, Jessica Taylor, and Jenna Allen. They are also the cohosts of the Pastors’ Wives Tell All podcast - a podcast by pastors’ wives for church leaders and anyone desiring to peek inside their proverbial glass houses. As best friends from three different churches and denominations, they are breaking down walls within the Church and crushing pastor wifey stereotypes with a little ministry therapy and a whole lot of Jesus—plus the occasional Instagram dance party!
Key Points from Our Conversation: * So often people pressure pastor's wives to meet certain expectations. When they don't, it can leave congregants feeling disappointed. The best way to not get lost in other's expectations of you is to remember who you are and who you belong to. We do not seek the approval of man, but rather to serve Christ. * It's common for people to assume pastor's wives are too busy or that they have a large community they spend time with, but truthfully being a pastor's wife can be lonely. Support your pastor's wife by checking on her and including her in your events. * When you're part of a pastor's family, it puts your life on display. People always seem to catch you in your worst moments and it can create disillusionment. The best solution is to create a new culture of vulnerability. Only then will walls start to break and change will happen. * Seeking counseling is unfortunately still a taboo subject in the church. Some consider it a sign of weak faith and others believe that it's an attempt to replace God's counsel, but seeking therapy is not an either/or, it's a both/and. Faith is our foundation, but the Bible advises us to seek wise counsel. Lay down your pride and seek counseling from God and a professional therapist. What you don't talk about owns you. * Changing the stigma around therapy in the church starts from the top. Your pastor is not a licensed counselor and there are times when it's wise to seek a licensed professional therapist.
Let’s Get Real Practical: * Do you have a negative stigma about seeing a counselor? Ask the Lord if He's directing you to see a counselor. You can find a list of Christian counselors at The American Association of Christian Counselors or through Focus on the Family's Christian Counselor Network.
Connect with Pastors' Wives Tell All: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael in talking with Jess Connolly. Jess is the author or co-author of several books, including Wild and Free, You Are the Girl for the Job, and Breaking Free from Body Shame. Along with her husband, Nick, she planted Bright City Church in Charleston, South Carolina, where they live with their four children. Jess is a woman who wants to leave her generation more in awe of God than she found it. She is passionate about family, God's Word, and seeing women take their place in the kingdom.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * We live in a defeated acceptance of exhaustion. Living right now is too much. Life is tiring and we’re accepting defeat because we think this is just how things are. * Women often feel they need permission to rest, but we don't need permission. God invites us to rest - He even commands it. He wants rest for us. * There will always be more to do. Ask yourself if you need to see accomplishment more than you need to feel at home in your body and soul. Do we need acceptance from others more than we need communion with God, our bodies, and our people? God integrated rest into life. We work from rest, not rest from work. We’ll never be prepared if we don’t start from a place of rest. * Spiritual exhaustion occurs anytime we trade abundance with God for obligation. We are not obligated to do things for God. He can act independently of us. God asks us to help and join in His good works, but His love for us is not based on our actions or inaction. * Our society has reached a point where exhaustion is normal – maybe even something to be proud of. Yes, there are life factors that affect sleep, but many of us aren’t victims of fatigue, we’re volunteers. Consider this - would God praise you for working past the point of exhaustion or would He want you to be a good steward of your body and energy? * There are a lot of practical ways to get more sleep like turning off the TV, putting the phone down, using blue light blocking glasses, or journaling. Pay attention to your pace during the day. Did you overcommit? Are you consistently feeling rushed? Notice the cues your body is giving you and give yourself what you need. * Don't overcomplicate the sabbath. It's simply 24 hours of enjoying God and the life He has given us. How you enjoy Him is your choice, but don’t try to get ahead.
Let’s Get Real Practical: What area of rest do you need to lean into with the Lord and reevaluate this season? What beliefs do you have about rest and do those beliefs line up with God’s Word?
Connect with Jess: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm chatting with Calvin Burns. Calvin is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Austin, Texas, who is deeply committed to guiding individuals through their challenges with eating disorders, substance abuse, and trauma. His approach is built on a foundation of empathy, understanding, and a personal dedication to each client's journey.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Calvin struggled with suicide and addiction until God blessed him with the opportunity to walk away from it, but walking away wasn't easy. Stopping his addiction felt like a significant loss, but the truth is the addiction was blocking what God had in store for him. * If you have chosen addictions that help you numb the hard things you're facing, choosing to stop will come with a lot of complex feelings. It's important to anchor yourself to things that have been proven true, right, and trustworthy. * Calvin began his career counseling individuals with alcohol addiction but soon noticed similar thought processes in people who struggled with eating disorders and body image. When we face hardships, it's easier to numb through a variety of addictions rather than process our thoughts and feelings. It can be more complicated when it comes to food addiction as you can't avoid eating like you would other substances. * Disordered eating is a pattern of eating habits or an approach to food that is inconsistent or driven by insecurity, fear, or uncertainty. Disordered eating is the first stage of an eating disorder when those insecurities become identity. * Behind most men struggling with eating disorders is a fear of weakness. Their value gets distorted and they believe that their strength is their worth. But it's not limited to men. Both men and women struggle because of a desire to be in control or desired, sometimes it's an attempt at emotional management, and other times it can be a struggle to ask for help. * If there is a man in your life struggling with body image issues, be consistent and direct in addressing him about it. * If you are struggling with body image, it can get better. You can have a life where you enjoy yourself and your body. When you can be present in your life, your relationships will be better. * Community and support are crucial when you're working to change your thought processes around body image. You will not always have the internal motivation you need to succeed. * If you see that someone you love would benefit from counseling, practicing vulnerability yourself is a great invite for them to feel comfortable opening up. * Men can feel that showing emotions is a sign of weakness, but true strength is acknowledging what’s wrong and the willingness to do something about it. Change offers growth, opportunity, and momentum. * Suffering produces endurance, endurance produces character, character produces hope, and hope doesn’t lead us to shame. Our hope in a good God that loves us and is for us is everything.
Let’s Get Real Practical: What suffering have you endured? Have you allowed Jesus as your high priest to embed hope in your heart in the darkest situation?
Connect with Calvin: website Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm speaking with a woman who was key in releasing Image Restored, Susan McPherson. Susan is an author acquisitions editor for David C. Cook Publishing and their Esther Press imprint for women. She is dedicated to encouraging and equipping women to courageously stand strong in the truth of God’s Word through her work leading the women’s community for Esther Press. She loves Jesus, coffee, college football, and her life as a wife and mother in the Nashville, Tennessee, area.
Whether you're interested in becoming an author or not, this conversation with Susan is such an encouragement for women to pursue what God has called them to. In this episode, we discuss how authors are chosen for publishing, why being servant-minded is crucial when partnering with others, and not missing out on God's plans because we feel inadequate.
Don't miss the est.HER conference happening April 11 - 13, 2024 in Spring Hill, TN!
Let’s Get Real Practical: Your "why" has to be greater than your "what-ifs."
What’s your why? What’s your what-if? Which voice is louder, your why or your what-ifs?
Connect with Susan: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm chatting with a very special guest - my husband, Dr. Matthew Gilbert. Matthew Gilbert, DC, of BBC Health in Lewisville, Texas, is passionate about taking a collaborative, integrative approach to health care. He believes that patients receive the most health benefits when medical and chiropractic doctors work together to provide a comprehensive, personalized treatment plan.
Dr. Gilbert established BBC Health to integrate his expertise in chiropractic techniques with family medicine to provide patients of all ages in the Lewisville area with the best medical, chiropractic, and rehabilitation services around. He fosters a warm, caring, family environment in an easily accessible, state-of-the-art facility. Dr. Gilbert specializes in multiple chiropractic techniques and spinal rehabilitation, and he’s an expert at evaluating and treating sports-related injuries.
When not at the office, Dr. Gilbert enjoys spending time with his wife, Rachael, and their three children, Ellie, Olivia, and Zeke.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * We all struggle with some form of comparison. In my case, I was comparing my current body to a previous version of myself when Matt offered this life-changing perspective - "Stop comparing yourself to other women, including your younger self. She’s another woman." * Fear of aging indicates a fear of death. But when we have hope of eternal life with Jesus, there is nothing to fear. Everything else will fade away, but we can have confidence in our relationship with Christ. * To be able to extend unconditional love to our spouse, we must experience the unconditional love of Christ ourselves. Our ability to love is an overflow of His love for us. * We often believe that our toxic body image only affects us, but what we believe about ourselves greatly affects our marriages, families, sex life, and relationships. * Husbands are called to tend to their wives as a gardener would tend to his garden. You cannot beat a plant into growth, you must provide a supportive environment for it to flourish.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Break the comparison yardstick with the 3 Rs: recognize, repent, and rejoice
Resources: BBC Health Image Restored
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm speaking with mother and daughter, Debbie Morris and Elaine Fisher. Debbie Morris is an author and pastor in Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas, who delights in helping women understand who they are in God so they can discover their destinies and experience victory in life. Elaine Fisher is an author, speaker, and pastor in Houston, Texas, and is passionate about sharing authentic revelation from the lessons she is learning as God writes her story of redemption and freedom.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Debbie and Elaine wrote The Good Mess to give an honest account of God's goodness amid a messy life. Elaine experienced her own "prodigal son" story by confessing her struggles and sins to God and a trusted community that helped her find freedom. * If you've walked away from God, He is still waiting to welcome you home. Not just that, He will meet you where you are and walk with you every step. If you allow Him, God will enable you to dig into your mess and find encouragement. * Debbie and Elaine's relationship changed when Elaine was able to authentically treat the friendship with respect and honor and when Debbie was able to move from the role of instructor to counselor. * When we feel God is calling us to something, we often have expectations of what that should look like. But God honors those who trust Him, regardless of the outcome. * If you are a wife who is experiencing a messy marriage, better days are coming. Finding ways to bond is difficult and not all days will be good. Remember to guard your words and influences on the hard days and sow seeds of joy and life into your marriage. * In the moments when things feel abnormal ("irregular heartbeats") you can choose to let things go or evaluate further what is happening. Do you notice these moments? And if you do, do you care enough to love the other person back to health? * God is good and no matter what mess you're in, He can and wants to redeem it. He has a purpose and plan for the mess if you'll allow Him to use it. * When you encounter God, your situation may not change but your perspective will. He will give you the encouragement you need to thrive.
Let’s Get Real Practical: What messes can you rejoice in today?
Buy The Good Mess: Finding Beauty in Imperfect Moments Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm chatting with my friend, Cynthia Yanof. Cynthia is a wife, mother, podcaster, blogger, and everyday girl who is ridiculously committed to not taking herself too seriously. She currently hosts the popular MESSmerized podcast; many Christians are familiar with her work for ChristianParenting.org, as well as her time as the creator and host of the ministry’s Pardon the Mess podcast. Cynthia worked as an attorney before pursuing a career encouraging and equipping women in their God-given callings. She loves speaking, writing, foster care, and hanging out in Dallas with her husband Mike and three kids.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Cynthia wrote the book after growing up in a Christian household and realizing she had faith on Sundays and in big moments but struggled to understand what everyday faith looked like; faith in the messy middle. * "If your theology doesn’t meet up with your reality then it’s not a theology at all, it’s just good advice.” * Often in the messy times, it seems the Lord is quiet when you know He could act. In those moments, it's important to remember all the time God has been faithful. He doesn’t remove the hardship from us, He uses it to show us His faithfulness. * Don’t focus on the promising future, live in the cherished present - that is where God has intentionally placed you. * Lies are being fed to us and we need to slow down and assess how they're impacting our faith. Question what you believe and assess if it's true. * With self-awareness and input from her trusted community, Cynthia identified 3 lies that were shaping her life - ordinary isn’t enough, everyone has to love and accept me, and her worth is determined by the success and failure of her kids. * We have to start valuing quality over quantity, especially with friendships. You cannot be all things to all people. * Be driven by what is significant at the moment and what has eternal value, not something you’re holding from the past. * Wherever life is off-script, God is still in it. Lean in now; don’t wait for a better time to do the hard important stuff. Allow God to create His bigger picture out of the mess.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Read Matthew 19 and consider these two questions - What do you need to let go of? What are you holding on tightly to?
Connect with Cynthia: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
God put it on my heart to dedicate the first month of this new year by hosting a “First Fruits” podcast series. In this series, we are coming together every Monday morning and giving the first of a different area of our lives to the Lord.
We have covered plans, time, rest, and health. This week God put it on my heart to bring in a new topic - our words.
Key verses:
Proverbs 16:24, "Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body."
Exodus 24:3, "Moses came and told the people all the words of the LORD and all the rules. And all the people answered with one voice and said, 'All the words that the LORD has spoken we will do'.”
Job 19:2, “How long will you torment me and break me in pieces with words?
Psalm 12:6, "The words of the LORD are pure words, like silver refined in a furnace on the ground, purified seven times."
Psalm 17:6, "I call upon you, for you will answer me, O God; incline your ear to me; hear my words."
Psalm 19:14, "Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O LORD, my rock and my redeemer."
Process:
Lord, how is my heart? How are my words? Are there any words I need to stop listening to? How would You like me to use my words this year?
Resource:
If you are not yet in our JOYmail community, I want to invite you to join today. Once a month I send an email with a personal note from me, favorite finds, podcast updates, and a free therapy resource. Go to rachaelgilbert.com and click the freebies tab to join the community.
God put it on my heart to dedicate the first month of this new year by hosting a “First Fruits” podcast series. In this series, we are coming together every Monday morning and giving the first of a different area of our lives to the Lord.
So far, we have discussed plans, time, and rest. This week, we are giving the Lord the first of our health and wellness.
Since we are four weeks into the new year, chances are many of you listening have already started some form of New Year's resolution to eat differently or move more. Chances are also high that those resolutions have already been broken. If that’s you, there is no shame here. Just a chance to give this area to the Lord once and for all, in a way that is honoring to the Lord. The world offers us quick fixes and promises about our bodies but the Lord shows us how to steward our bodies in a way that feels life-giving and full of joy and peace.
Key verses:
1 Corinthians 3:16-22, "Don’t you realize that all of you together are the temple of God and that the Spirit of God lives in you? God will destroy anyone who destroys this temple. For God’s temple is holy, and you are that temple. Stop deceiving yourselves. If you think you are wise by this world’s standards, you need to become a fool to be truly wise. For the wisdom of this world is foolishness to God."
Romans 12:1-2, "And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him. Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect."
Process:
God, what does honoring my body look like in this season? What is a simple step you are asking me to take that will improve my health this year? What habit do I need to start or stop this year, as an act of worship to You?
Resources:
Learn more about our integrated medical practice BBC (Building Better Care) Health at bbchealth.com
Take the What is Your Body Trying to Tell You? quiz at rachaelgilbert.com/quiz
Check out my book Image Restored at imagerestoredbook.com
God put it on my heart to dedicate the first month of this new year by hosting a “First Fruits” podcast series. In this series, we are coming together every Monday morning and giving the first of a different area of our lives to the Lord.
Last week we brought the first of our day and time to the Lord. This week, we are bringing the first of our labor to the Lord in the form of rest.
Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath. This is not a religious checklist; rather, it’s a gift from God.
It’s convicting to remember that not entering Sabbath rest is an act of disobedience. Honoring the sabbath day is a commandment, that’s how deeply the Lord knows we need it and we trust Him when we set aside that time to enter His sacred rest.
Process:
Repent - God, I repent for not taking a Sabbath day of rest. Please forgive me for not receiving this gift of rest. I receive your grace and forgiveness today.
Rejoice - Thank God for rest. It was His idea.
Revisit - What does rest look like for me in this season?
Resource:
If you are not yet in our JOYmail community, I want to invite you to join today. Once a month I send an email with a personal note from me, favorite finds, podcast updates, and a free therapy resource. Go to rachaelgilbert.com and click the freebies tab to join the community.
God put it on my heart to dedicate the first month of this new year by hosting a “First Fruits” podcast series. In this series, we are coming together every Monday morning and giving the first of a different area of our lives to the Lord.
Last week we gave our plans to the Lord and this week, we are dedicating the first of our day and our time/energy throughout the day.
We cannot pour from an empty cup. If you want secure confidence this year, start by spending time with the Savior. It’s in this sweet space that He imparts peace and tells us who we are. It’s something we can’t earn, yet He freely gives.
Process:
What can I do to remind myself to give the first of my day to the Lord? What is taking my energy that is not fruitful? What is a time thief in my days?
Pray:
"Lord, I yield to you as my shepherd today. Thank you for your goodness, mercy, love, and supernatural favor and wisdom that follow me everywhere I go. Enlarge my family’s territory in all that we do. Keep your hand upon us and deliver us from evil. Show us the way we should go, for to you we entrust our lives. In Jesus’ name, amen."
Resource:
If you are not yet in our JOYmail community, I want to invite you to join today. Once a month I send an email with a personal note from me, favorite finds, podcast updates, and a free therapy resource. Go to rachaelgilbert.com and click the freebies tab to join the community.
Welcome to the first episode of 2024! Last year, God put it on my heart to dedicate the first month of this new year by hosting a “First Fruits” podcast series. We wrapped up our December Process and Pray series. If you missed it, you can still go back and listen.
In this First Fruits podcast series, we will take every Monday and give the first of a different area of our lives to the Lord. The first area God put on my heart was our plans.
Key verses:
Proverbs 19:21, "You can make many plans, but the Lord’s purpose will prevail."
Psalms 33:11, "But the plans of the Lord stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations."
Giving our first shifts our plans to His purpose. We give Him our first plans by pausing to ask for wisdom and discernment before moving forward. It’s not complex and doesn’t require much time, but it does mean being intentional in our planning.
Process:
"God, what plans do I need to submit to You?" Think of a specific plan you have in mind. Ask God for His timing on moving forward with this plan.
"God, show me any of my plans that are not from You. I don’t want to move forward if you aren’t in it."
Resource:
If you are not yet in our JOYmail community, I want to invite you to join today. Once a month I send an email with a personal note from me, favorite finds, podcast updates, and a free therapy resource. Go to rachaelgilbert.com and click the freebies tab to join the community.
Back by popular demand is our annual Process and Pray series! If you’re new here, in December, we spend every Monday morning in a series where we process and pray through the year. Each week the focus will be different, but the theme of processing and praying will remain the same. As a therapist, I believe in the power of pausing and reflecting so we can embrace the present and look forward to the future.
Thus far, we have discussed victories, boundaries, and prayers. We are finishing the series by reflecting on words, or promises, from God we are standing on.
Process:
What word did God give me for the year?
What promises has God spoken to me and my family?
Pray, "God, what word are you giving me for the coming year?"
Resource:
Thank you for joining me in the month of December as we praised, processed, and prayed through the year. I would love it if you would take the time to share this series with a friend so we can walk boldly into the new year. If you haven’t already, please leave a review for the show so other listeners can join us on this journey through life with Jesus as our guide.
In December, we spend every Monday morning in a series where we process and pray through the year. Each week, the focus will be different, but the theme of processing and praying will remain the same.
We started this series by looking at the goodness of God by reflecting on our victories and last week we reflected on boundaries. Today, we are pausing to process answered prayers.
Process:
What prayers have I seen answered this year? Write them down.
What am I still praying for? Don’t quit.
Pray, “Jesus, what bold prayers do you want me to pray this coming year?”
Read:
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, "Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."
Resource:
Do you still need a Christmas gift for someone? Two resources mentioned in today’s episode that would make great gifts are the Radjoy Surrender Cross and my book, Image Restored. Give it as a gift and invite them to join you in a small group to read it and pray together.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm speaking once again with Lee Strobel. Lee is a New York Times bestselling author whose books have sold millions of copies worldwide. He earned a journalism degree at the University of Missouri and was awarded a Ford Foundation fellowship to study at Yale Law School, where he received a Master of Studies in Law degree. He was a journalist for fourteen years at the Chicago Tribune and other newspapers, winning Illinois’ top honors for investigative reporting (which he shared with a team he led) and public service journalism from United Press International. Lee also taught First Amendment Law at Roosevelt University. A former atheist, he served as a teaching pastor at three of America’s largest churches. Today he’s founding director of the Lee Strobel Center for Evangelism and Applied Apologetics at Colorado Christian University. Lee and his wife, Leslie, have been married for more than fifty years and live in Texas. Their daughter, Alison, and son, Kyle, are also authors.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Lee wrote Is God Real? at the request of his publisher after realizing how many Google searches have been performed on the topic. * People are deconstructing or leaving Christianity due to increased skepticism and less popularity among younger generations. * Evidence for the resurrection is the key tenant of the Christian faith. We can have confidence in this evidence based on execution, early reports, empty tomb, and eyewitnesses * Many people will point to suffering as a case against a good, loving God, but true love involves free will. We as imperfect humans have allowed evil and suffering to exist, but in His goodness, He fixes the things He had no part in breaking. * It can be easy to feel as though God is too hidden, but often it's not that He isn't instructing us, it's that He's saying something we'd rather not hear. * A majority of Christians tend to rely on their personal experiences as validation of His existence, which is a valid expression of faith. However, we need to know the evidence as we will be challenged by those who have had different experiences. * The "apologetic pyramid" involves looking logically through the evidence that points to Christianity from three different world views - theism, atheism, and polytheism. Only Christianity passes the test of logic and livability.
Let’s Get Real Practical: As we move into the new year, I'm pausing, processing, and praying about where the Lord wants to take the show in 2024. In the meantime, please take some time to process and pray through 2023 with my latest Talk Therapy series.
Resources: Ep. 144: The Case for Heaven with Lee Strobel
Connect with Lee: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
In December, we spend every Monday morning in a series where we process and pray through the year. Each week, the focus will be different, but the theme of processing and praying will remain the same.
We started this series by looking at the goodness of God by reflecting on our victories. In this episode, we are pausing to process our personal boundaries this year.
Pray:
“Jesus, what boundaries do you want to encourage me to set in my life?”
Process:
What boundaries did I establish that went well this year?
What unspoken boundaries did I find myself frustrated with when people broke them? Sometimes, a boundary is not a boundary unless it is spoken.
What areas of my life might need new boundaries this coming year? Boundaries can change with seasons.
Resource:
Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No To Take Control of Your Life by Dr. Henry Cloud
Back by popular demand is our annual Process and Pray series! If you’re new here, in December, we spend every Monday morning in a series where we process and pray through the year. Each week the focus will be different, but the theme of processing and praying will remain the same. As a therapist, I believe in the power of pausing and reflecting so we can embrace the present and look forward to the future.
We started this series by looking at the goodness of God. Today we are looking at what worked and what victories we experienced this year.
Process:
What victories or breakthroughs came this year? There is nothing too small to celebrate.
What went well that I want to carry into the new year? (Consider how time was spent, relationships you want to invest in, etc).
Thank God for these victories with your voice.
Tell someone about the goodness of God.
Resource:
One of my victories this year was my book, Image Restored. If you don’t yet have a copy, learn more or grab one at imagerestoredbook.com.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm speaking with J. Warner Wallace. He is a Dateline featured Cold-Case Detective, Author, Speaker, Senior Fellow at the Colson Center for Christian Worldview, and Adjunct Professor of Apologetics at Talbot School of Theology (Biola University) and Southern Evangelical Seminary.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * As a detective, J. Warner couldn't commit to Christianity without being convinced it was objectively true. In his book Cold-Case Christianity, he applies ten common rules of evidence he used as a non-believer to make the case for Christianity. * There are two broad categories of evidence - direct and indirect. Direct evidence includes an eyewitness account; broad (or circumstantial) is everything else, including what is there and what's missing. They are not different in terms of quality. You can make a solid case with completely indirect evidence, but we have an unreasonable expectation of evidence. * Jesus was an evidentialist. He provided both forms of evidence through several eyewitness accounts and through the miracles he performed. Faith isn't blind. The authors of the New Testament were eyewitnesses to Jesus and He stayed with his disciples 40 days after the resurrection as irrefutable evidence. * If you examine the gospels, you will determine that what they say about Jesus is true. But if you want to allow that truth to change you, you have to examine what the New Testament says about you. * There is one factor that contributes to flourishing – humility. That's why it's vital that the first step into Christianity is submission.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Lean into whatever form of knowing or believing in God that makes you uncomfortable – experiential or evidential
Connect with J. Warner Wallace: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
We are in the Friendship Series. The first week I asked you to draw a friendship timeline. That laid the foundation of looking at past and current friendships, as well as noticing healthy and unhealthy themes in this area. The next two weeks we discussed gossip and jealousy. We are finishing the series by discussing grace and healthy communication.
Scripture:
John 1:16-17, "For from his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace. For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ."
Have you received God’s grace? Or are you still living under condemnation and unrealistic expectations for yourself? You can’t extend what you haven’t received.
Grace does not give permission for people to walk all over you like a doormat. Honest communication gives space for grace while also setting spoken boundaries.
Process:
Do I need to receive God’s grace?
Who in my life extends me grace? Who do I need to practice extending grace to?
Challenge:
Pray, "God, I receive Your grace today."
Resource:
In my book, Image Restored, the last counselor cornerstone activity is called the Community Wheel. If you own the book, I suggest you use that activity throughout this friendship series. You can also use the Comparison Yardstick activity with today’s episode. If you don’t have the book, go to imagerestoredbook.com to learn more and purchase a copy.
If you aren’t yet subscribed to my email newsletter, do that today as we are emailing a PDF download of the community wheel to the community this month. Go to rachaelgilbert.com click the freebies tab and subscribe to the community there.
We are currently in the Friendship Series. The first week I asked you to draw a friendship timeline. That laid the foundation of looking at past and current friendships, as well as noticing healthy and unhealthy themes in this area.
Last week we discussed gossip. This week we are going after another sin that is sure to bring friendships down - jealousy.
Andy Stanley describes the problem with jealousy in his book Enemies of the Heart - "Jealousy is dangerous. It’s dangerous because it shapes our attitudes toward other people. It’s hard to actively love someone you’re jealous of. It’s hard to serve (or submit to) someone who’s a constant reminder of what you’re not. Eventually, jealousy takes control of our attitudes toward people who have done nothing more than pull ahead of us in a race they’re not even aware of."
Scripture:
Proverbs 27:4, "Wrath is cruel, and anger is overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy?"
James 3:13-18, "Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom. But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. Such “wisdom” does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness."
Three Rs to eliminate comparison:
RECOGNIZE REPENT REJOICE
Process:
Ask God if there is anyone in your life you need to recognize and repent of jealousy
Challenge:
Pray over the person you are tempted to compare or notice a jealous spirit come over you when you think of them.
Consider sending your friends a text or note telling them why you are grateful for them.
Resource:
In my book, Image Restored, the last counselor cornerstone activity is called the Community Wheel. If you own the book, I suggest you use that activity throughout this friendship series. You can also use the Comparison Yardstick activity with today’s episode. If you don’t have the book, go to imagerestoredbook.com to learn more and purchase a copy.
If you aren’t yet subscribed to my email newsletter, do that today as we are emailing a pdf download of the community wheel to the community this month. Go to rachaelgilbert.com click the freebies tab and subscribe to the community there.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author, Natalie Runion. In 2019 after watching many of her peers walk away from the church and their faith, Natalie began Raised to Stay, a ministry for those who have wandered, wondered, and wrestled with the Church and the challenges of full-time ministry. Known for her black boxes of hard truth on social media for the Church and church leaders, her heart is to see a generation finish their race as they partner with a good Father who is faithful to complete the work He began in each of us.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * It can be difficult to distinguish between church hurt and church abuse as the line will be different for everyone based on past traumas. Abuse is any harm that causes psychological damage. * You can be assured that as part of the Church, you will be hurt and it will take hard work to resolve, but if we stick with it, we can experience the hope and the holy. He is faithful and He will finish what He has started. * Celebrity culture has become prevalent in the church. We have to stop putting so much weight on people and put the focus back on God. When we are vulnerable and share our wounds, we point people to Jesus and remove ourselves from the pedestal. * It's okay to wrestle with your role in the Church. People admire those who persevere. Continuing to engage in a relationship with Jesus despite the hurt can help to build the faith of others. * It's important that the older generation mentor and disciple the younger generations. They are not competition, they are collaborators. * Offense has become a pandemic in the church. If you are offended, start by looking internally. Take it to God and ask Him to help you discern why and if you're living with a spirit of offense. * Even if you can't stay in the church, you can still abide in God. He doesn’t disconnect from you when disconnect from the church.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Have you ever considered how you came to your faith? What’s your salvation story?
Connect with Natalie: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
We are currenly in the Friendship Series. Last week I asked you to draw a friendship timeline. That laid the foundation for looking at past and current friendships as well as noticing healthy and unhealthy themes in this area.
Speaking of unhealthy, let’s address one toxic trait that will bring every friendship crashing down- GOSSIP.
Scripture:
Proverbs 26:22 (MSG), "Listening to gossip is like eating cheap candy; do you want junk like that in your belly?"
Process:
Who do I need to stop gossiping about? Is my main form of communication with friends gossip?
Challenge:
Be mindful of leading with gossip. When you are tempted to gossip, ask, "What do I really need in this moment?"
Resource:
In my book, Image Restored, the last counselor cornerstone activity is called the "Community Wheel." If you don’t have the book, go to ImageRestoredBook.com to learn more and purchase a copy. If you aren’t yet subscribed to my email newsletter, do that today as we are emailing a pdf download of the community wheel to the community. Go to rachaelgilbert.com click the freebies tab and subscribe to the community there.
This week we're starting new series on Talk Therapy all about friendship.
Scripture:
Proverbs 18:24,"Friends come and friends go, but a true friend sticks by you like family."
Process:
Draw a friend timeline What themes did you notice in your friendships? Who do you need to forgive?
Challenge:
Forgive whoever God asks you to release. Bless them. Consider writing them a letter you never mail or use the “empty chair” technique and read the letter aloud to them, then shred it.
Resource:
In my book, Image Restored, the last counselor cornerstone activity is called the "Community Wheel." If you don’t have the book, go to ImageRestoredBook.com to learn more and purchase a copy. If you aren’t yet subscribed to my email newsletter, do that today as we are emailing a pdf download of the community wheel to the community. Go to rachaelgilbert.com click the freebies tab and subscribe to the community there.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm chatting with someone whose words changed my life, Dannah Gresh. Dannah is the founder of True Girl, bringing moms and daughters closer to each other and closer to Jesus, and co-host of the Revive Our Hearts podcast. Dannah has authored over 27 books including And the Bride Wore White, Lies Young Women Believe (with Nancy Leigh DeMoss) and Lies Girls Believe. More than 20,000 leaders and 100,000 moms have taught her curriculum and over 500,000 people have attended her live events and retreats. Dannah and her husband, Bob, live on a hobby farm in central Pennsylvania. They have four adult children and four grandchildren.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Dannah wrote Happily Even After about her and her husband's experience after he revealed an addiction to pornography - a more common problem than we typically believe, even in established marriages. * It's easy to be upset with our spouse's actions, but they're often not personal, rather they are a coping mechanism learned in childhood. Sexual addiction can be as addictive as drugs because of the way our brains respond to the stimulant. * Shame will wreak havoc in our relationships. James 5:16 tells us, "Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective." If you want true intimacy in your relationship, it will require facing hard truths. * As Christians, we believe that our marriage should reflect Jesus’ love for the church. We are uniquely that picture when we choose to play the role of Jesus in forgiving our spouse. * When we seek comfort through "forbidden fruits" like porn, drinking, or overeating, it's an alert that we are not finding our satisfaction in Christ. Find a Christian counselor to talk to and dig out the root of the lie that you're choosing to believe and hold it to the truth of Jesus. * Sometimes it takes setting hard boundaries in order for people to recognize the depth of their actions and the effect they're having on others. * If you are in a relationship that is affected by a pornography addiction or infidelity, you are not alone. Though you do need to give grace while setting difficult boundaries, you also have to tend to your own heart. If you are waiting on your spouse to heal you're heart, you've got things out of order - only God can heal you. * One essential truth your relationship will need to survive is that trust is a gift you choose to give. It can be built by consistent action over time, but ultimately you must choose trust.
Let’s Get Real Practical: If you’re holding on to a sexual secret, get help from a professional so that you can be set free.
Resources: Ep.29: Lies We Believe & the Truth That Sets Us Free with Dannah Gresh American Association of Christian Counselors
Connect with Dannah: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
Last week on Talk Therapy, I asked kind of a strange question - what are you wearing? If you missed that episode, please go back and listen. This week, I have another question for you - do you have a mental shield?
Throughout scripture we are reminded about the importance of the Lord acting as our shield. The Hebrew word for shield is rooted in a verb meaning "to defend, cover, or surround." I love this because the fact that it is a verb shows that God is actively defending us.
Pick up your mental shield by asking the Lord to protect your mind as you surrounded by negative people or environments. Sometimes we can’t change the environment but we can put up a mental shield against it.
Resource:
Please take advantage of the free resources offered on the "Freebies" page of RachaelGilbert.com
Today is not a series, but is in line with the "Finish Strong" theme. I felt God tell me to ask, “What are you wearing?”
Ephesians 6:13, "Put on the full armor of God, so that… you may be able to stand your ground."
Process:
What are you wearing? Are you daily putting on the full armor of God?
Resource: Go to imagerestoredbook.com to learn more and purchase a copy today.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I’m chatting with Katy McCown. Katy is a writer for Proverbs 31 Ministries, host of the Best Day Ever podcast, and author of She Smiles without Fear. Katy left her job as a television news reporter to join her husband, Luke, on their adventure in the National Football League. Luke and Katy have six children.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * There’s a difference between a life that’s handled and a life that’s whole. A life that is whole is attainable and God has given us what we need to fulfill that life. * Our quest to keep it together eventually causes us to fall apart. Belonging begins with brokenness. If you’ll admit it, we share a common brokenness. When we understand we’re all broken, it dissipates the feeling of not belonging. Our common brokenness leads us to Jesus; that’s where our belonging begins. * We don’t know when life will get difficult, but when it does, it’s important who we have with us. You may not feel like you have time to invest in others, but there will come a time when you need a community. There will also be a time when someone needs us to be there for them. * Build community by integrating others into what you’re already doing – grocery shopping, etc. * If you've been burned in a church community, understand there's a difference between hurt and confrontation. You can practice forgiveness, separate, and agree to keep preaching Christ. * Ask these things – what about this is between me and God? What about this is between them and God? What needs to happen between them so that God is glorified? * Jesus was focused on unity for his disciples. He wants us to live in unity with others. Belonging in the body of Christ is what was of his heart before the crucifixion.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Watch out - check your heart, and allow other trusted people to speak into your life Work it out - take your bitterness to God, don’t let it harden
Resources: Episode 102: She Smiles Without Fear with Katy McCown The One Thing that Will Devastate Any Relationship
Connect with Katy: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
rOur series this month is called “Finish Strong.” The first week, I shared a funny story about how my marathon coach taught me the value of RPE (a.k.a. rate of perceived exertion) so I could finish my race strong. If you missed that episode, please go back and listen as it laid the foundation for this series.
We are discussing our spiritual RPE: Rejoice, Pray/Practice, and Embrace
Embrace:
Paul says in Philippians 4:11-12, "I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need."
And just after this sermon, he says the verse we have all recited from Philippians 4:13, “I can do all things through him who strengthens me.”
This verse is so much more than a cute coffee mug inspiration. It’s a reminder that our spiritual RPE (rejoice, pray/practice, embrace) empowers us to receive the strength we need in Christ to keep moving forward.
Embracing helps us enjoy the NOW and it builds character for the future. Embracing hidden seasons of little empowers us for the spotlight seasons of much.
Keep running, my friend. The finish line is worth the intentional RPE.
Process:
What do I need to embrace in this season? Am I content in every circumstance?
Challenge:
Embrace the now moments.
Resource: There is a chapter about my running story in my book, Image Restored. Go to imagerestoredbook.com to learn more and purchase a copy today.
Our series this month is called “Finish Strong.” Last week, I shared a funny story about how my marathon coach taught me the value of RPE (a.k.a. rate of perceived exertion) so I could finish my race strong. If you missed that episode, please go back and listen as it laid the foundation for this series.
We are discussing our spiritual RPE: Rejoice, Pray/Practice, and Embrace
Pray & Practice
I hope you listened to our guest interview with Mary Jo Pierce a few weeks ago because we discussed being consistent prayer warriors.
Philippians 4:6 reminds us, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
Paul goes on to remind us in Philippians 4:8 to practice what we witnessed him do, thinking only on things that are true and worthy of praise. He knew to be finishers, we would have to learn the art of taking our thoughts captive and making them obedient to Christ.
I believe one of the many reasons prayer is so powerful is because it shifts our focus to things that are true and worthy to be praised.
Process:
Am I growing weary in redirecting my thoughts and concerns through prayer?
Challenge:
Practice prayer when you notice your thoughts are not focused on what is true and worthy of praise
Resource:
Do you ever color while you pray? Coloring isn’t just for little kids. It’s a great way to calm our nervous system while talking to God or meditating on a verse. This is why I included coloring pages in every chapter of my book. Go to imagerestoredbook.com to learn more and purchase a copy today.
If you are looking for a free resource, you can head to rachaelgilbert.com, click the freebies tab and download the body image coloring book.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm chatting with Holly Wagner. Holly and her husband, Philip, are the senior founding pastors of Oasis Church – a growing, multi-cultural, church located in Los Angeles. They have been married for over 38 years, love life, and enjoy spending time with their two adult children, Jordan and Paris, and their 4 grandchildren! Holly is passionate about seeing the Church grow strong and relevant to the culture surrounding it and for women to become who God has designed them to become. She founded She Rises (formerly GodChicks), and has empowered thousands of women around the world. Holly has appeared on many television shows and is currently one of the hosts of TBN’s Better Together. She has written several books; her newest is Find Your Brave, an honest look at navigating storms, and has been an encouragement to the thousands who have read it.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Starters' and finishers' strengths and weaknesses will complement one another. Sometimes God instructs us to let go of things we've started, but other times there is no one who can complete something but the person who started it. * Even when you get what you've been working for, you'll find you're at the beginning of something new. Take one step at a time. * Maturity isn't linked to age, it corresponds with what we persevere through. We’re afraid to share our failures and what we’ve been through, but that’s what helps others overcome. Your past can be used to give someone else a future, but only if you share your story. * The Bible is the living Word of God meant to direct and convict us. * You can’t expand the kingdom of God without a fight. Battles never come one at a time, they come all at once so you must remain prepared. * If you don’t share the love of God, who will? But first, you must receive the love of God to be able to love others well. * Who we are is being forced and formed in the valley. If you're struggling to make it through, take the focus off of yourself and serve others.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Make a list of the things you've started, then ask the Lord what He's calling you to finish now or later and what to let go of.
Connect with Holly: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
Today starts a new series called Finish Strong.
Growing up, I wasn’t much of an athlete. I ran track because all my friends were on the team. I was so slow that on one particular long run, even my coaches packed up and went home by the time I finished the course. With this glimpse of my running background, you can imagine my surprise when God called me to run a marathon.
Running a marathon sounds like a strange “call,” but in hindsight, God was teaching me several spiritual lessons by getting my attention through doing something bigger than anything I could do in my strength.
I have learned much about running since completing this race and several others. RPE (rate of perceived exertion) is what my coach used that day to get me in the right group so I could finish my race. We are all in a spiritual race. The best way to run with endurance in order to finish strong is to stay in tune with our spiritual RPE. In this scenario, RPE stands for Rejoice, Pray/Practice, and Embrace.
Philippians 4:4 says, “Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice.” Notice it doesn’t say, “Rejoice when everything is going right, and you have no troubles.” If we want to run our race with endurance, it will require a heart posture that rejoices even when things are hard.
Process: Psalm 118:24, "This is the day the Lord has made I will rejoice and be glad in it."
Are you a rejoicer?
Challenge: Practice rejoicing at least once a day this week
Resource: There is a chapter about my running story in my book, Image Restored. Go to imagerestoredbook.com to learn more and purchase a copy today.
We are in a three-part series where I am sharing three questions you can reflect on when things seem off but you can’t quite pinpoint what it is. These come from the back of my book, Image Restored, but I am expounding them here.
So far we've explored the questions "How is your heart?" and "How are your words?"
This week I want you to consider, "What foundation am I standing on?" (If you missed it, I recommend that you go back and listen to my Stand Firm Series.)
Read:
Matthew 7:24, "Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock."
Exodus 14:13, "Moses answered the people, “Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the LORD will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again."
2 Chronicles 20:17, "You will not have to fight this battle. Take up your positions; stand firm and see the deliverance the LORD will give you, Judah and Jerusalem. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Go out to face them tomorrow, and the LORD will be with you."
Psalm 33:11, "But the plans of the LORD stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations."
Luke 21:19, "Stand firm, and you will win life."
Process:
What are you standing on?
Resource: As I mentioned, the three questions we are exploring in this series come from my book, Image Restored. Go to imagerestoredbook.com to learn more and purchase a copy today.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm chatting with Mary Jo Pierce. Mary Jo served as pastor of prayer and Intercession at Gateway Church for 17 years and is passionate about helping you find your voice in and through prayer! An accomplished author and public speaker, Mary Jo combines her love of prayer, scriptures, and baking bread through her ACTS 2:42 seminars. Her books Let It Rise, Adventures in Prayer, and Follow Me, have unlocked the joy of living prayer for readers across the world.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Prayer is so much more than what we do or say, it’s who we are. It’s the essence of abiding in God. * Prayer is often put in a religious box, but each of us has a prayer life that’s unique to us. * Prayers aren’t always words. Prayer connects people to God. * Engaging God in your tasks, whether they're hobbies, errands, etc., transforms those acts into worship because they glorify Him. * There’s so much to pray about that we can get overwhelmed, but we are uniquely created to carry God’s burdens in certain areas, i.e. our "prayer assignments". If you don't know what your assignment is, ask the Lord how you should pray, then listen to His response. * We think of rest as a vacation, but rest (Sabbath) is God’s gift to us. Ask the Lord what rest should look like for you. * Sabbath is a spiritual discipline. Ask how you want your Sabbath to look from your other days.
- Rest is a weapon.
- Designate a space for meeting with the Lord.
Let’s Get Real Practical: What does practical, simplified prayer look like for you? How can you bring prayer into what you're already doing?
Connect with Mary Jo: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
We are in a new, three-part series where I am sharing three questions you can reflect on when things seem off but you can’t quite pinpoint what it is. These come from the back of my book, Image Restored, but I am expounding them here.
Last week we explored the question "How is your heart?" This week I want to know - how are your words?
Luke 6:45 reminds us that “the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.” When you aren’t sure about the answer to the previous question about your heart, listen to the words you speak.
Proverbs 12:18, "The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing."
Proverbs 18:8, "The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to the inmost parts."
Process: How are your words?
Pray: Psalm 19:14, "May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer."
Resource: As I mentioned, the three questions we are exploring in this series come from my book, Image Restored. Go to imagerestoredbook.com to learn more and purchase a copy today.
We are in a new, three-part series where I am sharing three questions you can reflect on when things seem off but you can’t quite pinpoint what it is. These come from the back of my book, Image Restored, but I am expounding them here.
The first question I want you to ask is this - How is my heart?
“People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.” - 1 Samuel 16:7
“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” - Proverbs 4:23
We guard our heart by submitting them to the Lord for His protection and doing our part with routine heart checks, just like you would with a medical doctor. If your heart doesn’t feel right about an area, ask the Lord to place a pin on what is off.
Process: How is your heart?
Pray: Psalm 139:23-24, "Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!"
Resource: As I mentioned, the three questions we are exploring in this series come from my book, Image Restored. Go to imagerestoredbook.com to learn more and purchase a copy today.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I chatted with Nancy Houston. Nancy is an Executive Leadership Coach, a Licensed Professional Counselor, a Certified Sex Therapist, and author of “Love and Sex: A Christian Guide to Healthy Intimacy" and "Then God Made a Woman: Unwrapping Female Sexuality.” Nancy developed and leads Next Level Leadership Groups which is a relational approach to leadership. She is also a former adjunct at DBU and Concordia University and a fellow at the Townsend Institute at Concordia University.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * If you've experienced sexual trauma, the beginning of healing is understanding that what happened wasn't your fault and you don't need to carry shame. * If you’ve survived a trauma, show yourself some gratitude for enduring something hard. Then address the effects of that trauma. It’s hard work, but God is asking you to press in. * God designed us to be sexual creatures. We can experience so much freedom if we have the courage to have great conversations around the topic of sex. * When speaking to our children about sex, using proper medical terms for genitalia creates a sense of authority on the topic. * Women are just as sexual, if not more sexual, than men but the process of arousal is different. Women tend to feel guilty about taking time to get aroused, but receiving pleasure guilt-free is good for you. * We have to own our bodies as women, therefore we have to know our own bodies. Take time to explore. God created sex to be both extremely pleasurable and bonding. * If you're struggling with shame, stop hating yourself. You are so worth loving. Be kind to yourself.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Ask God if there is any area of your sexuality that needs to be restored.
Connect with Nancy: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
We just wrapped up our Stand Firm series. If you missed it, go back and tune in. I pray it makes your faith arise as you stand firm on the Word of God.
Today, I want to have a heart-to-heart with you about why you might not be ready for change.
Stages of Change:
Stage 1: Precontemplation Stage 2: Contemplation Stage 3: Preparation Stage 4: Action Stage 5: Maintenance Stage 6: Relapse Stage 7: Termination
Process:
What stage are you in?
Pray:
Psalm 139:23-24, "Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!"
Resource:
Are you ready to see a change in how you view your body? I highly encourage you to get a copy of my book, Image Restored. Go to imagerestoredbook.com to learn more and purchase a copy today. If you already own a copy, today is your reminder to take action and read it!
Welcome to the Stand Firm Series. My vision for this series is to help you build a foundation with scripture that will help you be able to stand firm when it seems everything is shaking.
Solid Foundation Verse:
Luke 10
Stand Firm in Action:
Stand your ground!
Process:
What are you standing on?
Do you believe you have been given authority? If so, use it! If not, ask the Holy Spirit to awaken the desire in you to be a bold believer in Christ.
Resource:
Did you know I wrote a book? It’s called Image Restored, and I believe it will help you take your authority back over your body, in Jesus name. Go to imagerestoredbook.com to learn more and purchase a copy today.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm chatting with Dr. Shanna Crawford. Dr. Crawford is the CEO of Crawford Clinics, Leadership Performance Psychologist, executive coach, podcast host of Unlock U with Dr. Shannan Crawford, and speaker with over 20 years of studying psychology and a decade of applying empirically supported strategies to optimize performance for executives, she has innovated the Restoring-Self-Cohesion approach. Dr. Crawford and her team of psychotherapists at Crawford Clinics have provided life-transforming counseling for thousands of business leaders, couples, families, and adolescents. As founder and CEO, she has established a holistic practice with a team of highly vetted and trained therapists to ensure every client achieves success in their life, relationships, and business. Crawford Care is an HR benefit offered to organizations providing mental health counseling for employees and their families.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Self-cohesion is the methodology of syncing your inner world - spirit, soul, and body - to resolve inner feuds, i.e. "I want to lose weight, but I also want to eat the donut". * When we feel the need to seek pleasure in order to minimize our unpleasant feelings, we need to slow down, create space to get curious, and have an "internal board meeting". We can compartmentalize for a time, but if the root remains unaddressed, it becomes a door where the enemy can attack your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. * Many fear that by acknowledging hard truths they will become stuck in bad feelings. However, honoring our honest thoughts and feelings rather than trying to ignore them or cover them with numbing activities allows us to experience the present with the appropriate level of emotion. * Pause and ask what your soul is actually needing. Until you work though it, the fears will come back at times you’re out of control. * If you're feeling too overwhelmed to examine your emotions, it's okay to take a break. Be kind in stewarding your soul. Take some time to calm down, come back, and find compassion for yourself. Ask yourself what you're protesting too much about or attempting to avoid. * Dieting attempts to address a symptom, but long-lasting change will not come from willpower and self-hatred. We have to start by finding compassion for ourselves and addressing what our soul is truly craving.
Let’s Get Real Practical: When was my last internal board meeting?
How are my spirit, soul, and body?
Connect with Shannan: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
Welcome to the Stand Firm Series. My vision for this series is to help you build a foundation with scripture that will help you be able to stand firm when it seems everything is shaking.
Solid Foundation Verse:
2 Timothy 1:7, "For God has not given you a spirit of fear or timidity, but power, love, and a sound mind."
Process:
What are you standing on?
Resource:
Have you downloaded my guide with three steps to overcome fear and pursue your God-given dreams? It’s what I used alongside this key verse from 2 Timothy 1:7 to step out in faith when God called. Go to rachaelgilbert.com/overcomefear to download it for free.
Welcome to the Stand Firm Series. My vision for this series is to help you build a foundation with scripture that will help you be able to stand firm when it seems everything is shaking.
Solid Foundation Verse:
Psalm 34:5, "Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame."
Stand Firm in Action:
Where your eyes go, your body will follow. Where your mind goes, your life will follow.
The enemy loves to get us so focused on looking down at ourselves that we forget to look up at Jesus. Looking up looks like talking to Him (especially when you fail), worshiping, praying, reading the Word, and thinking about things that are true and worthy of praise.
Process:
How can you look to God this week?
What are you standing on?
Resource:
Did you know I send a monthly Therapist Thoughts email? I promise It’s not your average newsletter. Each month I share a personal note from me that you can’t find anywhere else on the internet, favorite finds, podcast updates, and a free therapy resource. Join the community for free today.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm chatting with Morgan Jackson about her new book Tired of Trying: How to Hold On to God When You’re Frustrated, Fed Up, and Feeling Forgotten. Ashley Morgan Jackson is an author, speaker, and social media expert. She works full-time for Proverbs 31 Ministries and has ministered to her own online community for over ten years. She is passionate about women learning to let go of the lie that they have to perform for God’s love and instead realizing that they can receive His love, just as they are. Ashley is a wife of fourteen years to her wonderful husband, Daniel, and a mom to two growing boys. The family lives in Charlotte, North Carolina. If you asked Ashley what her favorite thing to do is, she would say it’s laughing till it hurts!
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Ashley wrote Tired of Trying after a hard transition period where she struggled with identity loss. Once she surrendered, God broke away the things that she identified herself with and told her who she was in Him, regardless of anything she accomplished. But nothing changed until she was honest and surrendered to the Lord. * When we go through hard things, we're marked by them. But making it through gives us the authority to encourage others on the other side of our struggles, so it's important to share our stories with others, whether it's in a public forum or one on one. * Sometimes was have to stand with our good God in our discomfort and grieve the things He’s chosen not to do; He knows what's best for us even if it hurts for a while. * Choosing to love and trust God does not take away the hard parts of life. But He will bring peace and purpose. * If there's a lie you continue to believe about yourself, let the Lord reveal the patterns so that He can address the root of what’s hurting us. * If you're in the thick of a hard season, don't fake it. If it hurts, acknowledge that and grieve it with the Lord. Your honesty is safe with God.
Let’s Get Real Practical: What am I trying to prove?
What am I afraid to lose?
Is God telling you to lay down the trying because you’re striving in your strength? Or are you burnt out and need a fresh perspective?
Connect with Ashley: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
Welcome to the Stand Firm Series. My vision for this series is to help you build a foundation with scripture that will help you be able to stand firm when it seems everything is shaking.
Solid Foundation Verse:
Psalm 1:2-3, "but whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and who meditates on his law day and night. That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither—whatever they do prospers."
Stand Firm in Action:
When tempted to strive, this verse reminds me that it’s being rooted in God’s word that makes me thrive.
Process:
What are you standing on?
Create a stand firm album
Resource:
Did you know I send a monthly Therapist Thoughts email? I promise It’s not your average newsletter. Each month I share a personal note from me that you can’t find anywhere else on the internet, favorite finds, podcast updates, and a free therapy resource. Join the community for free today.
We aren’t in a series right now, but I am sharing words God is putting on my heart each week. Today’s topic is a time to speak and a time to be silent.
Scripture:
Ecclesiastes 3:7, "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be silent and a time to speak."
Luke 12:12, “for the Holy Spirit will teach you at that time what you should say.”
1 Thessalonians 4:11, "...and to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you."
Questions to ask when questioning whether to be silent or speak:
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Have I checked my heart? In other words…what are my motives?
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Do I need to process my own pain first?
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What’s the end goal? Reconciliation or revenge?
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Have I listened? (hint: you shouldn’t speak or be silent until you truly listen)
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If I choose silence, will I get resentful?
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If I speak, is it out of love?
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Have I spoken with the Lord about it first?
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Have I sought wise counsel?
Final thoughts:
I’ve noticed the Lord often asks us to do whatever is outside our comfort zone. If you are used to being silent, He is likely calling you to learn to speak up.
We just wrapped up The Restored Series. Be sure to take the time to listen if you missed any of those episodes. We aren’t in a series right now, but I am sharing words God is putting on my heart each week.
Today’s topic is shame vs. sorrow. Shame says, “Keep this a secret.” Sorrow says, “It’s time to surrender.” Shame stays in the dark; sorrow is an opportunity to step into the light. Shame condemns. Sorrow convicts.
Scripture:
2 Corinthians 7:10, "Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death."
Romans 8:1-2, "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death."
Process:
Reflect on Godly sorrow in your life and receive it
We just wrapped up The Restored Series. Be sure to take the time to listen if you missed any of those episodes. We aren’t in a series right now, but I am sharing words God is putting on my heart each week.
Today’s topic is letting go and I've invited a very special guest to share with you - my daughter, Ellie. In this episode, she shares her own struggle to let go of a good thing and trust that God has a purpose in moving her into a new season.
Process:
Why are you afraid of leaving?
Remember to BOOGIE – be outstanding or get involved elsewhere
My book, Image Restored, was released in March and we are in a Restored Series here on the podcast. While this series can address body image struggles, I am teaching how you can apply it to ANY area of your life. We have covered a lot of topics in this series, so if you missed any, now is a great time to go listen to any you missed. This week our theme comes from chapter 18 where we discuss healthy and unhealthy community.
Therapist Thoughts:
"We are made in the image of God; therefore, we have His relational DNA. We’re wired for connection. When something or someone damages our “wiring,” it doesn’t have to be fatal or final. Taking the risk to restore relational cords can move us from isolation to consolation." - Dr. Linda Hoover
Process:
Create a "community wheel"
Resource:
The resource I recommend for all of these episodes is my book, Image Restored. (If you’ve already purchased the book, join the private community on the book page. We will email you free resources and printables you can use right away.)
My book, Image Restored, was released in March and we are in a Restored Series here on the podcast. While this series can address body image struggles, I am teaching how you can apply it to ANY area of your life. We have covered a lot of topics in this series, so if you missed any, now is a great time to go listen to any you missed. This week our theme comes from chapter 17 where we discuss God’s grace.
Therapist Thoughts:
"Take a moment to sit in the stillness of God’s presence. Imagine grace being freely poured over you like warm, fragrant oil. Breathe in deeply as it is absorbed into every thirsty cell. Notice any places where the oil does not soak in. Offer those areas to the Lord and allow His gentle grace to soften your soul until it is fully saturated and satisfied." - Dr. Linda Hoover
Process:
The antidote to shame is grace.
Pray:
2 Corinthians 12:9, "And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me."
Resource:
The resource I recommend for all of these episodes is my book, Image Restored. (If you’ve already purchased the book, join the private community on the book page. We will email you free resources and printables you can use right away.)
What's Your Body Trying to Tell You Quiz
My book, Image Restored, was released in March and we are in a Restored Series here on the podcast. While this series can address body image struggles, I am teaching how you can apply it to ANY area of your life. We have covered a lot of topics in this series, so if you missed any, now is a great time to go listen to any you missed. This week our theme comes from chapter 16 where we discuss God’s love and Jesus’ blood.
Psalm 103:8 says, “The LORD is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.”
That phrase “abounding in love” can be expressed in a single Hebrew word, chesed, meaning “goodness, kindness.” This is only the tip of the iceberg in exploring the Bible and what we find about God’s love for us.
If we look at the character of God throughout all of Scripture, we see this theme of His goodness and kindness toward humanity. It’s a love that most of us don’t know from humans, yet God shows that love to us every day, no matter our failures or sins.
He loves you, my friend.
Therapist Thoughts:
“God’s love. You can’t buy it. You can’t lose it. It is unconditional, with no strings attached. It is not dependent on your looks or any measure of performance. Love can’t be earned. It’s freely given. You can find it anywhere. It’s for everyone. Including you, no matter who you are, where you’re from, or what you’ve done. His love covers it all.” - Dr. Linda Hoover
Process:
Ask the Lord how much He loves you.
Resource:
The resource I recommend for all of these episodes is my book, Image Restored. (If you’ve already purchased the book, join the private community on the book page. We will email you free resources and printables you can use right away.)
This week our theme comes from chapter 15 of Image Restored where we discuss how your unique design is a reflection of being made in God's image.
Process:
What do you see when you look in the mirror? Write all the things that come to mind.
Strikethrough negative attributes and ask what God sees instead.
Circle positive attributes and ask God why He designed you that way.
Do you see Jesus reflected in your image?
Resource:
The resource I recommend for all of these episodes is my book, Image Restored. (If you’ve already purchased the book, join the private community on the book page. We will email you free resources and printables you can use right away.)
What's Your Body Trying to Tell You Quiz
My book, Image Restored, was released in March and we are in a Restored Series here on the podcast. While this series can address body image struggles, I am teaching how you can apply it to ANY area of your life. We have covered a lot of topics in this series, so if you missed any, now is a great time to go listen to any you missed. This week our theme comes from chapter 14.
This chapter is about body restoration, but my heart for this episode is to emphasize that God cares about your body. After all, it was His idea and He called it "good."
Do you think of your body as a friend, acquaintance, or an enemy? Learning to listen to your body starts with rebuilding trust in it and with God.
Two key quotes from this chapter:
"Your body is always speaking to you."
"Where our minds go, our body and lives will follow."
Process:
What does my thought process look like around my body?
How is my relationship currently with my body? Does it need to be restored?
Resource:
The resource I recommend for all of these episodes is my book, Image Restored. (If you’ve already purchased the book, join the private community on the book page. We will email you free resources and printables you can use right away.)
What's Your Body Trying to Tell You Quiz
My book, Image Restored, was released in March and we are in a Restored Series here on the podcast. While this series can address body image struggles, I am teaching how you can apply it to ANY area of your life. We have covered a lot of topics in this series, so if you missed any, now is a great time to go listen to any you missed. This week our theme comes from chapter 13.
This chapter is actually about expectations, but I wanted to sit and have some real talk with you about why it’s important to be real with ourselves, God, and others about our expectations, fears, thoughts, emotions, or anything else that is weighing us down.
Two key quotes from this chapter:
"Stop comparing yourself to your younger self; she’s another woman."
"My future grandchildren will not remember Grandma by my wrinkles or gray hair; instead, they will remember a woman who feared and praised the Lord."
Therapist Thoughts:
The brain is far more sophisticated than we realize. No one has to say that we are more valuable, special, or worthy when we are skinny or have a certain body type. Our brains automatically fill in the gaps when we see that those who get the most attention in the media are thin, youthful, attractive people. This leaves the brain constantly evaluating questions about our identity and worth through the lens of, How attractive, thin, or acceptable am I? This is incredibly stressful, as something as important as our worth as human beings is constantly being evaluated based solely on our outward appearance. On a sticky note, write words of affirmation to retrain your brain to focus on the truth from God’s Word. (Adapted from Dr. Shannon Crawford)
Process:
Expectations line: What expectations have you set that you are exhausted from trying to live up to?
Pray:
Psalm 26:2, "Test me, Lord, and try me, examine my heart and my mind."
Resource:
The resource I recommend for all of these episodes is my book, Image Restored. (If you’ve already purchased the book, join the private community on the book page. We will email you free resources and printables you can use right away.)
What's Your Body Trying to Tell You Quiz
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm chatting with author Michael MacKenzie about his book, Don’t Blow Up Your Ministry: Defuse the Underlying Issues that Take Pastors Down. Dr. Michael MacKenzie is the executive director of Marble Retreat, an intensive counseling center for Christian leaders, and he is the supervisor of the Doctorate of Ministry Pastor Care track at Lincoln Christian University. A licensed professional counselor for 26 years specializing in caring for pastors, he has also been a chaplain and is an ordained pastor. He is an author, speaker, and teacher on ministry and counseling issues.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * People that work in ministry choose to do so to serve others, but often that can lead them to performance-based stress. * Ministry is stressful and Satan is cunning, so it's important to be aware of our own brokenness. When we begin to say yes out of guilt and fear, we are no longer motivated by love and freedom. * Fear of man seeps in when we're seeking love, value, and respect from others. It's a process to get the truth of God fully into our hearts, souls, and minds. * We are all works in progress, so have grace. Being aware of our wounds helps us respond with a different reaction. * Most people in ministry are so focused on others, they don’t inspect themselves and ask what’s going on and why. What is my brokenness that’s causing these situations? * People in ministry can use hard work as a means to outwork their insecurities. We need to be aware of our motivations - when are we doing it for God and when does it become about ourselves? * If you have trouble resting, ask what the fear is that's driving you on a deeper level. * The most common problems for ministry leaders are isolation, unrealistic expectations, and poor boundaries. * If you want to attack your root issues, pay attention and ask for God to reveal what you're missing and journey in relationship with others who can speak into your life. * We can help care for church leaders by managing our expectations of them. Is there someone else who could assist me with my issue?
Let’s Get Real Practical: Is my life pace sustainable?
If not, what needs to change?
How am I really doing? How is my heart?
Connect with Michael: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
When motives go wrong, it’s an attack on our original design. This week our theme is Motives Restored from chapter 12 of my book, Image Restored.
Therapist Thoughts:
People are not born with core beliefs; they are learned. What core beliefs have you learned about your body that God would love to rewrite?
Process:
One of the best questions I’ve learned to ask that uproots the mold in my heart is this: “Why are you chasing what you are chasing?”
Pray:
Psalm 26:2, "Test me, Lord, and try me, examine my heart and my mind."
Resource:
The resource I recommend for all of these episodes is my book, Image Restored. (If you’ve already purchased the book, join the private community on the book page. We will email you free resources and printables you can use right away.)
What's Your Body Trying to Tell You Quiz
This week our theme is Identity Restored from chapter 11 of my book, Image Restored.
This chapter is about comparison and I felt God highlight this as an identity issue. When we are busy comparing ourselves to others, we fail to see who God created us to be.
Three Rs to breaking a comparison yardstick:
Recognize Repent Rejoice
Therapist Thoughts:
Body-checking is the habit of seeking (or avoiding) information about your body’s weight, shape, size, or appearance. A counselor can help if body-checking becomes problematic or interferes with your life, affects your eating habits, or becomes a way to control fear and anxiety about your body. When you find yourself body-checking, take a moment to check in with your heart and ask, "What am I looking for?"
Process:
Next time you compare, ask, what am I looking for? What is missing in my heart that makes it hard for me to celebrate others?
Resource:
The resource I recommend for all of these episodes is my book, Image Restored. (If you’ve already purchased the book, join the private community on the book page. We will email you free resources and printables you can use right away.)
What's Your Body Trying to Tell You Quiz
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author (and certified laughing yoga coach) Ainsley Britain about her book Don't Date a BooBoo Dude. Ainsley is also a Podcast Host and Enneagram Coach, helping young adults embrace their confidence, date healthy, and discover their identity in Christ. With extensive training with Josh Shipp, SheSpeaks, and Your Enneagram Coach, she reaches young adults and spurs them on to healthy, God-filled relationships.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Ainsley wrote Don't Date a BooBoo Dude from her experience of putting her worth in the hands of someone who abused her, although she wouldn't identify it as abuse until years later. Her abuser reinforced the lies about her identity that she already believed. Through counseling and prayer, she was able to recognize what was really happening. * After doing the work of counseling, EMDR treatments, and spending time with God, she stopped over-apologizing, became more confident, and began asking for what she needed in relationships. * There is a broken understanding between mentors and students (or in a parent/child relationship, etc.) that leads to broken empathy. In order to bridge that gap, we have to validate them and help them understand their identity in Christ. It's our responsibility as mentors to teach them the connection between their emotions and actions and processes that allow them to communicate clearly what they feel and need.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Take the What's Your Body Trying to Tell You Quiz Ask God - How is my mind? Is there anything it's time to process?
If these questions bring up a trauma response, please seek the help of a professional. You can find Christian counselors through the NACC at nacconline.org and learn more about EMDR at emdria.org.
Connect with Ainsley: website | Instagram | TikTok | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week our theme is Worship Restored from chapter 10 of my book, Image Restored.
This chapter is about idols, but I don’t think God wants to restore our idols. In fact, He wants to demolish them so worship can be restored. We are designed to worship, the question is to what or who are we worshipping?
God detests anything that comes between Him and us. The temple falls when idols enter because we turn our hearts away from the Lord and worship a god that can never meet our deepest needs.
Here’s the good news: God knew He would battle against idols to keep our hearts turned toward Him. This is just one more reason He sent Jesus to die for our sins. The answer to overcoming idols is letting Jesus access every area of our hearts.
DON’T LET SHAME AND SECRETS KEEP YOU FROM RETURNING TO HIM TO REPENT OF YOUR SIN.
Therapist Thoughts:
Shame is often associated with “should” statements. This is one type of distorted thinking that affects our decisions. These “shoulds” can often lead us to the land of neglect or obsession when not addressed. Try replacing “I should” with “I get to.”
Process:
God, what idols do I have in my heart? Stop and listen for his answer.
Resource:
The resource I recommend for all of these episodes is my book, Image Restored. (If you’ve already purchased the book, join the private community on the book page. We will email you free resources and printables you can use right away.)
What's Your Body Trying to Tell You Quiz
So far in the Retored Series, we have covered truth, temple, union, hope, family, heart, mind, and emotions. This week our theme is Behaviors Restored from chapter 9 of my book, Image Restored.
Therapist Thoughts:
"The diet industry puts a lot of effort into trying to help people change their habits through willpower and behavioral modifications. This top-down approach can be helpful for some people, but many people end up disillusioned, chasing one diet fad after another, because behavior modification alone is like trimming the top of a weed without getting all the roots. In contrast, a bottom-up approach addresses the root issues below the surface. With this approach, we switch directions, stop, take a deep breath, and invite God to show us His view of our bodies to make space for behaviors that come from our Creator’s core beliefs." - Adapted from Dr. Shannon Crawford
Questions I get asked about body image include, but aren’t limited to, the following:
What’s a healthy weight for my body type? Is it okay to weigh myself daily? Should I count calories or carbohydrates? Do I really need to exercise every day? What do you consider overexercising?
These, along with more intimate questions, have one thing in common: behavior.
Here are my questions back to those women and you: What is that behavior providing for you? Is my behavior driven by faith or fear?
Process:
Before you make a decision about food, exercise, body image, or any other behavior in your life, ask yourself these questions:
Does this behavior glorify God in my body? Is there any sin in this behavior? Are there any unhealthy thoughts or motives directing this behavior? Do I hide this behavior? Is this behavior something I want to pass on to the next generation?
Resource:
The resource I recommend for all of these episodes is my book, Image Restored. (If you’ve already purchased the book, join the private community on the book page. We will email you free resources and printables you can use right away.)
What's Your Body Trying to Tell You Quiz
This week on Real Talk with Rachael my friend, Anne Watson, is sharing her personal story of body image and bullying. Anne is a business strategy coach and the host of the Swayology podcast. She helps coaches and communicators think like a business so they can inspire like a boss by getting crystal clear about their niche and creating a transformational offer that gets results. She currently lives in the Dallas, Texas area.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * After getting bullied about her nose, Anne had surgery but quickly realized that changing herself didn't stop all the bullying. Years later, she realized that what actually earned her the respect she was looking for was standing up for herself and defending her boundaries. * Anne's core belief became that she needed to change herself for people to be kind to her instead of God's truth that we are valuable and loved as we are. * A true change came when Anne changed her perspective to be grateful that her body had faithfully served her despite how poorly she treated and spoke about it. * There's nothing wrong with wanting to feel your best, but it becomes dangerous when we feel we need to look a certain way or achieve something to earn the approval of others. * If you struggle to exercise, remind yourself that it's not something you have to do, it's something you get to do because you've been blessed with the ability to be active. Try thanking your body today for all it's doing for you. * When you’re unsure of yourself, you go through life looking down for the next place you’ll trip. But life is about looking up, enjoying the beauty in front of you, and trusting God that if you trip, you’ll be okay.
Let’s Get Real Practical: What core belief has positively influenced how you see yourself or the world? What core belief has negatively influenced how you see yourself or the world? What does God want to replace that core belief with today?
Connect with Anne: website | Instagram | podcast Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
So far in the Restored series, we have covered truth, temple, union, hope, family, heart, and mind restored. This week our theme is emotions restored from chapter 8 of my book, Image Restored.
In this chapter, we discussed how emotions have a way of letting us know what’s happening in our hearts if we will stop long enough to listen.
Emotions are not something we need to hide from, yet in order to stop and embrace them, we must normalize them. It’s all part of our divine design. We often avoid feeling out of fear that we can’t control our emotions. However, the more we practice feeling and expressing emotions, the more we give them an outlet to be expressed in a healthy way.
Therapist Thoughts:
When a client pinpoints an emotion she is experiencing, I often ask, “Where do you feel that emotion in your body?” Sit for a moment, take three deep breaths, scan your body from head to toe, and notice where you feel any emotion.
Process:
God, do I have an incorrect view of my emotions? What emotion am I feeling right now? Where do I feel that in my body?
Resource:
The resource I recommend for all of these episodes is my book, Image Restored. (If you’ve already purchased the book, join the private community on the book page. We will email you free resources and printables you can use right away.)
What's Your Body Trying to Tell You Quiz
So far in the Restored series, we have covered truth, temple, union, hope, family, and heart. This week our theme is mind restored from chapter 7 of the book.
In this chapter, we discussed the power of our thoughts and how they shape our lives. Where your mind goes, your life will follow. Learning to take my thoughts captive has been the single thing that has changed the trajectory of my life. I was in my 20s when I first learned I could choose what I meditate on. I began to “change the channel” of my thoughts and noticed every area of my life improved. As a counselor, I often use CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) to help people reframe negative thoughts. I shared those same tools in Image Restored so I hope you utilize them in every area of your life.
When confronted with a defeating thought, ask:
- What would I do if this defeating thought weren’t true? 2. What would I do if I weren’t afraid?
Any thought that disempowers you is not from the Lord. If you want a renewed and restored mind, starts by submitting it to the Lord. Then fill your mind with His truth.
Process:
Lord, I submit my mind to you. Lord, what am I meditating on? Is it true?
Resource:
The resource I recommend for all of these episodes is my book, Image Restored. (If you’ve already purchased the book, join the private community on the book page. We will email you free resources and printables you can use right away.)
What’s Your Body Trying to Tell You? Quiz
This week on Real Talk with Rachael in talking with author Michelle Myers. Michelle is the co-founder of She Works His Way. She is the author of Conversational Commentary on Acts: Gospel Mission Then and Now, Conversational Commentary on Ecclesiastes: Wisdom to Live for Heaven While on Earth, She Works His Way: A Practical Guide for Doing What Matters Most in a Get-Things-Done World, and Famous in Heaven and at Home. You can listen to Michelle weekly with her best friend and ministry partner on the She Works His Way podcast. She and her husband, James, live with their three children in Asheville, North Carolina, where James is the central discipleship pastor at Biltmore Church.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Anything we think will satisfy us outside of Jesus will disappoint us 100% of the time. Our sole purpose is to fear God and keep His commandments. * The emptiest feeling isn't not getting what you think you need to be happy, it's getting what you wanted and realizing that the Lord is all you need. * If you are stuck in a cycle, it's not your responsibility to know how to stop, it's your responsibility to submit it to God so He can stop it. You are not powerful enough to stop the cycle, but for Him, nothing is impossible. * God's sovereignty isn't an excuse to lead a passive life. God's plan is for us to be involved with His work in the world while we're in step with the Holy Spirit. * When we ignore the limits that God gives us, we limit our worship because our limits reveal our dependence on Him. * Overwork and laziness are equal disobedience. * God does not work in us reluctantly - it is "for His good pleasure." It is our job to work out our salvation. When we join with Him in the good work He's doing, we reflect the character of God to others.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Get clear on why you are chasing what you're chasing.
Connect with Michelle: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
So far in the Restored Series we have covered truth, temple, union, hope, and family. This week our theme is family from chapter 6 of the book.
In this chapter, we discussed how trauma affects our body image. It was never God’s original design for His children to suffer the level of pain we endure today. That’s exactly why He sent Jesus to bear our pain and shame on the cross.
One thing I know for certain is that pain and suffering leave a mark on our hearts. But it doesn’t have to get the final word. Today, I feel God saying He wants to restore wounded hearts. When He restores something, it’s even better than it was before. It goes back to His original design, which is a heart both shaped and loved by Him.
Process:
Lord, what area of my heart do you want to restore today?
This chapter’s Therapist Thoughts:
“EMDR acts like a reset button for clients to reconnect to memories that once harbored intense feelings of shame, fear, and sorrow. The once-held belief that vulnerability is a weakness is replaced with growth, strength, and healing.” - Dr. Mary Dainty
Resource:
The resource I recommend for all of these episodes is my book, Image Restored.
If you’ve already purchased the book, join the private community on the book page. We will email you free resources and printables you can use right away.
So far in the Restored Series we have covered truth, temple, union, and hope. This week our theme is family from chapter 5 of the book.
In this chapter, we discussed how our family of origin impacted our body image. The purpose of looking at our family is not to cast blame, but rather, to get healing and look for anything we do or don’t want to pass along to the next generations.
This chapter’s Therapist Thoughts:
An inner vow is often a promise we make to ourselves after being hurt or losing trust in someone. Though it feels like protection, it often brings more harm and barriers in relationships. Watch for words like never in your vocabulary to detect an inner vow.
As I prepared for today’s episode, I felt the Lord say there are two areas He wants to heal:
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Family relationships
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Inner vows you’ve believed or spoken. Even if your family doesn’t change, you have the power to draw a line in the sand and reclaim territory the enemy has wreaked havoc in for generations.
Scripture:
Isaiah 61:4, “The Lord rebuilds, restores, and renews that which was devastated for generations.”
Process:
God, what inner vow do I need to repent of and release to You today?
God, I give you …..(intercede in prayer for a specific family member)
Resource:
The resource I recommend for all of these episodes is my book, Image Restored
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm chatting with author Rebecca George about her new book, Do the Thing. Rebecca is also a speaker and host of the popular podcast Radical Radiance. Her greatest joy is helping women pursue their passions in a way that builds God’s kingdom. In her free time, she loves running outside or trying a new recipe with Garth Brooks playing in the background.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Rebecca felt called to write Do the Thing as an encouragement and tool to help women who feel their hearts stirred by God, but also find themselves held back by fear and point them to the truth - our job is obedience. God is in charge of the outcome. * A calling is that thread you find running through different seasons of your life. It's the thing that stirs you to use your unique set of talents to impact the kingdom. * When God prompts us to quit something sooner than we anticipated, we can experience shame or guilt. But there is no condemnation in Him. The assignment may change, but your calling didn't. The work He's refining in you is necessary for the next season. * The same spirit that raised Jesus from the dead is living in you. * Watching a sister step in her calling is not a personal loss. A win for the kingdom is a win for the kingdom and should be celebrated. If you struggle with comparison, set some healthy boundaries so you can focus on taking the next step of obedience and allow God to guide you. * If you struggle to see your unique place when you see others doing something you're called to, remember the Gospels and the values of the different writer's perspectives.
Let’s Get Real Practical: What did God last ask you to do? Are you doing that from a place of being?
Resource: 3 Action Steps to Overcome Fear & Pursue Your God-Given Dreams
Connect with Rebecca: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
So far in the series we have covered Truth, Temple, and Union Restored. This week our theme is Hope Restored from chapter 4 of the book.
The title of this chapter is “Structural Stories.” Here we discussed stories that have shaped our core beliefs and how we view ourselves and the world. Many of you listening today have stories you could share about the pain and heartache you’ve experienced that was not your fault. I am so sorry. As I prepared for today’s episode I sensed God wants to restore your hope.
Scripture:
Psalm 34:4-5
Therapist Thoughts:
Journaling is a great way to process emotions and events. This practice can also help you notice themes in your life. If you find it hard to write long journal entries, try using bullet points instead.
Process:
What story in your life brings fear, doubt, or shame?
Journal about it. Look to God for help.
We started the series with Truth Restored, then Temple Restored. This week our theme is Union Restored from chapter 3 of my new book, Image Restored.
There are two areas of a restored union to address today: you and your body and you and God. A restored body starts with a restored union with God.
Scripture:
Genesis 3:7-9 2 Corinthians 6:16
Therapist Thoughts:
Learn to listen to the messages your body sends through both pain and pleasure. Make a list of things that feel kind to your body, and implement them in your self-care routine.
Process:
What is your relationship with God? Is it time to restore union with Him? What is your relationship with your body? Would you call her a distant acquaintance, an enemy, or your best friend?
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm speaking with one of my mentors, Dr. Linda Hoover. Linda serves as the Executive Dean of Academics at The King’s University. As a licensed psychologist and ordained minister, she has a heart for empowering others to realize their God-given potential and purpose. Linda enjoys sushi dates with her husband, Jared, long walks, and cooking with her grandchildren.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * If you struggle to receive grace, ask God to allow you to see yourself as He sees you. If you can't absorb grace, it's difficult to be satisfied with who and where you are or reach your potential. * Rejoice in the good and give yourself space to make mistakes. * When God brings something before us, it's because He knows we're capable of dealing with it. We may not know what we're doing, but we can trust Him to know what He's doing. * Developing trust in relationships is incremental, even in our relationship with God. You have to trust to trust; risk is required to experience something new. * We're all on a journey - who do you want your companion to be? Allow the Holy Spirit to walk with you and listen to what He says about you. When we receive Christ, we receive His guidance.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Draw a circle and write out your community spokes.
Find out more about Image Restored at ImageRestoredBook.com Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
My book, Image Restored, was released last week and I felt led to start a series about restoration. When I completed writing the book, God showed me that each of the chapter's themes applies to so much more than body image. While this series can be used to address body image struggles, I am going to share it in a way that you can apply it to ANY area of your life.
You do not need a copy of Image Restored to follow along with this series but of course, I recommend it.
Last week, we started the series with Truth Restored. This week our theme is Temple Restored.
Therapist Thoughts:
Have you ever considered how the original sin involved food? Unlike other addictions, food cannot simply be avoided. Not if we hope to live! What a vicious hijack by the enemy to take something God intended to be a blessing and turn it into a source of struggle and shame. - Dr. Linda Hoover
Scripture:
Matthew 27:51
The temple restoration starts in our hearts. Our hearts within these bodies house the spirit of God wherever we go. We do not need to be a certain size, shape, or color to house the spirit of God. But we do need to steward this temple well to live life to the fullest. First, as a son or daughter of God, then our call to go out and bring the gospel to the ends of the earth flows from that identity.
Process:
What is your belief about your body (and heart) being a temple of God?
Ask God how He sees your temple.
What has the enemy stolen for you in this area?
Resource:
ImageRestoredBook.com
We serve a God of growth. When God says grow, nothing we do will stop it from happening. Don’t be mistaken, even when we don’t SEE the growth, it is happening. If you feel stuck or would love to see growth in different areas of your life, this series is for you. Each week we are focusing on an area of growth. You will notice EVERY week includes spiritual growth because, without it, nothing in our lives will grow. This week’s topic is Emotional Growth.
In this episode, I'm covering why emotional growth matters, what could be different if you grew strong emotionally, and what God growth looks like.
Growth Resources:
Talk Therapy: How to Identify Your Emotions How People Grow by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman Emotion wheel Emotional journal
Weekly grow challenge:
Let’s pause for a moment to see your response to two of these basic emotions:
When was the last time you remember feeling sad? Did you allow yourself to feel it? Did you tell anyone you felt it (in other words, did you express it)?
When was the last time you felt happy? Did you express it? Sometimes when we train ourselves to not feel sad or uncomfortable emotions, we also shut down feeling happy emotions.
Pay attention to your emotions and what you do with them when they come up. Do you feel and express?
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm chatting with my friend and the founder of Revelation Wellness, Alisa Keeton. Alisa is a leading certified wellness professional with more than 20 years of experience. She is a wholehearted pursuer of God’s love and is dedicated to educating and inspiring people to live healthy and whole lives in Christ. After more than twenty-five years as a fitness professional, Alisa felt God leading her to bring fresh meaning to the world of health and fitness. At first, she resisted but eventually, she got on her knees, rolled up her sleeves, and followed His call. In 2011, Alisa launched Revelation Wellness, a nonprofit ministry that uses fitness to spread the gospel message and invites participants to become their whole selves, designed by God. The Revelation Wellness instructor training program equips and sends out “fitness missionaries” throughout the United States and around the world. At the same time, RevWell TV brings faith-based online workouts and resources to anyone with Internet access. To date, she and her team have trained up and sent out over two thousand fitness professionals into the world. These professionals carry the message of what it means to love God, get healthy, be whole, and love others. Alisa is passionate about leading others to look in-depth at what it means to be transformed by God’s love, from the inside out.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * If God's given you a vision, you need to count the cost of choosing to follow it. "Following Jesus will cost you everything you never needed." * We need to slow down and practice just being. When we allow God to care for us like the loving Father He is, it allows us the space to focus on His wonder and enjoy a relationship with Him. * When it comes to following the assignment God has given you, your job is unwavering faith - the faith of a child. Stay fully convinced and rooted in your faith, count the cost, and run hindered.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Answer these three questions -
How is my heart? How are my words? What foundation am I standing on?
Find out more about Image Restored at ImageRestoredBook.com
Connect with Alisa: website | Instagram | Facebook | podcast Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
We serve a God of growth, so this month we're walking through a series about growth. If you feel stuck or would love to see growth in different areas, this series is for you. Each week we'll focus on a different area of growth, but you'll notice that every week features spiritual growth because nothing else can grow without it. For our first week, we're focusing on growing our mindset.
Your thoughts affect your feelings and your feelings affect your behavior. What could happen if your mindset grew?
Resources:
How People Grow: What the Bible Reveals About Personal Growth
Battlefield of the Mind: Winning the Battle in Your Mind
Challenge:
Pay attention to your thoughts and practice taking them captive
This month, we're in a series about attachments. We’ve already examined a few attachment types and why I addressed this topic in the introduction of my book, Image Restored. Then we discussed secure attachment to Christ and our call.
Last week and this week, I felt led to give you a glimpse of the private Image Restored podcast, available to those who preorder the book. While the whole book aims to deepen your secure attachment to our Creator, I’ve selected a few chapters that I feel will encourage you to grow in your relationship with Him in a new way. This week we're digging into chapter 13 which discusses body image and finding security in God's beauty.
As a bonus, we are giving downloads of the chapter coloring pages that line up with these episodes. To grab those, head to ImageRestoredBook.com, preorder the book, then input your receipt for access to all the goodies so you can use the therapeutic coloring sheet with today’s episode.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm chatting once again with my friend, Holley Gerth. Holley is a Wall Street Journal bestselling author of several books, including The Powerful Purpose of Introverts and What your Mind Needs for Anxious Moments. She's also the cohost of the More than Small Talk podcast, which recently passed one million downloads. Holley is married to Mark, a Mama to Lovelle, and Nana to Eula and Clem.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * It is not a sin to experience anxiety whether it's biological or Biblical. Philippians 4:6 which instructs us to "be anxious for nothing" is meant as a reassurance, not a judgment. God is our ally in helping us understand the root cause of our anxieties. * When experiencing anxiety, start by doing something physical to regulate your brain. Then instead of asking, "What's wrong with me?" reframe and consider what you can do now, at the moment like take deep breaths, get a drink, or walk away. * If you struggle with an inner critic, it's important to be gentle with yourself. Pause and listen to what your body is trying to tell you. If you find yourself going back to the critic, try talking to yourself like someone you love. "We don't talk that way to people. Apologize and try again." * Music can be very beneficial to aid with anxiety. We can use it to feel more joyful or to calm us down and help us shift to a different space. * “What we mentally rehearse matters.” Instead of thinking about what happens if things go wrong, imagine what would happen if they go right. We can mentally practice what we want to become real. It feels silly, but it’s the same thing as worry. * If you struggle to stay still, practice moving meditation. You don't have to sit still and silently to connect with God. Movement is bilateral stimulation which is beneficial in creating new thought patterns. * Anxiety is generally caused by fear. But through Christ, we don't have to fear - we are loved. Ask what is the lie, what is the truth, and what do I want to change.
Resources: Envision app
Let’s Get Real Practical: Make coloring while listening to music a regular part of your routine. You can access coloring pages for my book Image Restored when you preorder and visit ImageRestoredBook.com.
Connect with Holley: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
It was an honor for Pastor Robert Morris to endorse my new book, Image Restored. Tune into this short episode as he reads the foreword he wrote on why the church needs this message and what he loves about the book. Preorder Image Restored and access all the bonus gifts at ImageRestoredBook.com.
This month, we're in a series about attachments. We’ve already examined a few attachment types and why I addressed this topic in the introduction of my book, Image Restored. Then we discussed secure attachment to Christ and our call.
This week and next, I felt led to give you a glimpse of the private Image Restored podcast, available to those who preorder the book. While the whole book aims to deepen your secure attachment to our Creator, I’ve selected a few chapters that I feel will encourage you to grow in your relationship with Him in a new way. This week we're digging into chapter 8 which deals with emotions.
As a bonus, we are giving downloads of the chapter coloring pages that line up with these episodes. To grab those, head to ImageRestoredBook.com, preorder the book, then input your receipt for access to all the goodies so you can use the therapeutic coloring sheet with today’s episode.
This month we're in a series about attachments. Last week, we examined a few of the different types of attachments and why I addressed this topic in the introduction of my book, Image Restored. If you missed that episode, please go back and listen to see the foundation upon which this series is built.
For this episode, I felt the Holy Spirit ask me to share a prophetic word He gave me in worship last week and how it applies to our secure attachment to Christ and our call.
PROCESS:
What area of my life feels heavy? Is it due to wearing armor that’s not mine to wear?
MY STONE:
Today’s episode is brought to you by my book, Image Restored, which releases next month on March 7th, but you can preorder now and get the special price on Amazon of $13.99 (which is 30% off retail price). When you preorder, you automatically get the lowest price it dips to on Amazon. PLUS, you can access the private Image Restored podcast.
To learn more and access preorder bonuses, visit ImageRestoredBook.com.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm talking with Dr. Mary Dainty. Dr. Dainty is a fully licensed professional counselor (LPC) and a board-approved counselor supervisor. She operates a private practice in Fort Worth that focuses on trauma-related problems using EMDR. Additionally, Dr. Dainty works for Baylor Scott & White All Saints as a PRN intake and assessment clinician and is an adjunct professor at The King’s University in Southlake. When She's not working, she loves to spend time with her husband and son. Her favorite past times include sitting outside with a warm cup of tea and chitchatting with friends in the court, traveling to see friends and family, and any opportunity where she can sit on the beach curling the sand between her toes.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) helps retrain the brain's response to trauma by unblocking neurological pathways that help us process in a healthy way. * EMDR is effective for both "small t traumas" (adverse events) and "big T traumas" (substantially traumatic events) that have happened at any point in your life. The number of sessions needed will vary for each person and everyone will require some sort of maintenance. * Your brain has a phenomenal capacity to keep you safe. One of the ways it does this is by collecting information that might prevent harm in the future. However, it sometimes collects information that is not helpful, causing confusion. * If you have tried therapy or EMDR before and it wasn't effective for you or you had a bad experience, it's worth trying again. Different counselors use different methods and our needs change with our seasons of life. * As Christians, when something good happens as a result of an event, we don't want to consider the event traumatic because we've been taught to "count it all joy." However, it's worth reexamining those events and processing any complex emotions so we can heal.
Connect with Dr. Mary Dainty: website | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
It’s February which, to some, means the month of love. This month, I felt God say it’s time to dive into attachment. In this episode, we will look at a few of the different types of attachments and why I addressed this topic in the introduction of my book, Image Restored.
In secure attachments, individuals feel safe expressing emotions, communicating with others, and setting boundaries. An insecure attachment style may develop from abuse, abandonment, or a rocky relationship with a caregiver or parent.
Bottom line: When we are operating primarily from a place of insecure attachment, we cling to anything and anyone that gives us hope of love and security. The problem is that no man or achievement can ever fill a hole in our soul that only God can fill.
PROCESS:
- How is my attachment style? Is it secure or insecure? If insecure, what have I been clinging to?
- God, how do you want to improve my attachment to You?
RESOURCE
My book, Image Restored, releases on March 7th, 2023. When you preorder, you can access the private Image Restored podcast with short teachings, coaching calls, and other exclusive content. To learn more and access preorder bonuses, head to ImageRestoredBook.com.
God put it on my heart to dedicate the first month of this new year by hosting a “First Fruits” podcast series. In this podcast series, we've taken every Monday and given the first of a different area of our lives to the Lord. Last week we gave the first of our time and energy to God. In the last episode of this series, we're dedicating our finances to Him.
READ:
Matthew 6:21, "For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."
Proverbs 3:9-10, "Honor the Lord with your wealth, with the first fruits of all your crops; then your barns will be filled to overflowing, and your vats will brim over with new wine."
Malachi 3:10, "Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this,” says the Lord Almighty, “and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it."
PROCESS:
- Lord, what has my heart?
- How am I stewarding my finances? Anything I need to change?
RESOURCE:
The Blessed Life by Robert Morris
Pastor Robert is also my uncle and he wrote the foreword for my book, Image Restored. To learn more and access preorder bonuses, head to ImageRestoredBook.com. The book trailer is now available on that page, as well!
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm talking with actor Kevin Sorbo about his new movie Left Behind: Rise of the Antichrist. Kevin is most known for the lead role in “Hercules: The Legendary Journeys” which became the world's most-watched TV show. Following that success, he has been in over 90 movies and TV shows including God's Not Dead, Soul Surfer, Reagan, “Two and a Half Men,” “Psych,” “Hawaii 5-0," and “The OC”.
In this interview, we discuss his heart behind joining the latest Left Behind sequel, what he hopes people will take away from the movie, and the impact his faith-based films have had on audiences. He also shares his salvation story and how he got into acting, as well as some advice for Christians who want to pursue acting as a career.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Read the book of Revelation
Connect with Kevin: website | Instagram Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
God put it on my heart to dedicate the first month of this new year by hosting a “First Fruits” podcast series. In this podcast series, we will take every Monday and give the first of a different area of our lives to the Lord. Last week we gave the first of our health and wellness to God. This week we are dedicating our time and energy.
READ:
Psalm 143:8, "Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life."
PROCESS
- What can I do to ensure I give the first of my day to the Lord?
- What is taking my energy that is not fruitful?
- What is a time thief in my days?
PRAY
Lord, I yield to you as my shepherd today. Thank you for your goodness, mercy, love, and supernatural favor and wisdom that follows me everywhere I go. Enlarge my family’s territory in all that we do. Keep your hand upon us and deliver us from evil. Show us the way we should go, for to you we entrust our lives. In Jesus’ name, amen.
RESOURCE:
This is the final week my book launch team is open and I would love for you to join! To learn more and register, head to ImageRestoredBook.com. You can also see the book trailer and register to claim the preorder bonus, one of which is access to a private podcast series all about body image.
God put it on my heart to dedicate the first month of this new year by hosting a “First Fruits” podcast series. In this podcast series, we will take every Monday and give the first of a different area of our lives to the Lord. Last week we gave the first of our health and wellness to God. This week we are dedicating our plans.
Just recently I experienced the difference between plans submitted to God and those that aren’t submitted to Him. I prayed about the timing of releasing something, felt peace to move forward, and God blessed it. A few days later I was in a hurry to check something off my to-do list, didn’t talk to God about it, and moved forward, and you could hear the crickets chirping from the lack of response. The difference? One was submitted to God and His timing and the other was not.
READ:
Proverbs 19:2, Psalms 33:11, Exodus 33:15
PROCESS
- God, what plans do I need to submit to You?
- Think of a specific plan you have in mind. Ask God for His timing on moving forward with this plan.
- God, show me any of my plans not from You. I don’t want to move forward if you aren’t in it.
RESOURCE:
My book launch team is open and I have space to lead a group of women through an early-release copy of my book, Image Restored. The first 100 to register get a physical advanced reader copy of my book. Anyone after that will get a digital copy. To learn more and register, head to ImageRestoredBook.com.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I’m talking with Amanda Pittman. Amanda is the author of Stand in Confidence and the devotional 100 Days of Life-Changing Confidence, speaker, entrepreneur, and the Founder of Confident Woman Co., a ministry that equips women to stand confidently upon the finished work of Jesus. Through Confident Woman Co., Amanda hosts retreats, conferences, online events, podcasts, videos, and more. Amanda lives near Dallas, Texas with her husband, Michael, and her two children, Elijah and Lily.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Our job is obedience, God’s job is the outcome. Our job is faithfulness, God’s job is fruitfulness. * Clarity leads to confidence and confusion leads to insecurity. Many times we lack clarity because we lack connection to God. We're more connected to the world so we can’t see God or ourselves clearly. The more connected to God we are, the more confident we are. You can find confidence that lasts in a standard that never changes – the sacrifice of Jesus. * 4 components of confidence – Clarity – knowing your identity and design will help you know what to do Connection – first with God, then with others. Involve God in who you surround yourself with Competency – the more competent you are, the more confident you are. Do the work of healing and finding freedom from your past by renewing your mind Conviction – It's the "why" that drives you. We need to be others-focused. We get insecure when we focus on ourselves. * As Christians, we don't have to discover who we are - we are a new creation, children of God - you just have to embrace it. We don't have to search within ourselves to find meaning - we find meaning in the sacrifice of Jesus Christ which demonstrates His love for us. We must internalize it. * Instead of attempting to change your behavior, focus on reorienting your identity. Renew your mind by identifying yourself with righteousness rather than sin. * God does not have a speaking problem, but we often have a listening problem. If you are a child of God, you can hear His voice if you will create a space that allows you to tune out others and hear His still, small voice.
Let’s Get Real Practical: When praying about this section, God gave me two things to focus on - "rest and hear." Rest is a commandment for our well-being. It's a gift and where we can best hear God’s voice.
This week ask: How can I rest in my work? "God, show me pockets of rest in my day." What does a Sabbath day of rest look like in this season? "Holy Spirit, what are you whispering to me today?"
Connect with Amanda: website | Instagram | Facebook Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
God put it on my heart to dedicate the first month of this new year by hosting a “First Fruits” podcast series. In this podcast series, we will take every Monday and give the first of a different area of our lives to the Lord. We started the series by talking about rest. This week, we are dedicating our health and fitness. I realize this is the biggest area many of you recommitted to this year, but will you join me in doing it God’s way?
READ:
1 Corinthians 3:16-23; Romans 12:1-2
PROCESS:
- Jesus, what does honoring my body look like in this season?
- What is a simple step you are asking me to take that will improve my health this year?
- What habit do I need to start or stop this year, as an act of worship to You?
Resource: My book launch team is open and I have space to lead a group of women through an early release copy of my book, Image Restored. The first 100 to register get a physical advanced reader copy of my book. Anyone after that will get a digital copy. To learn more and register, head to ImageRestoredBook.com. The book trailer is now available on that page, as well!
Our integrated medical practice BBC (Building Better Care) Health (formerly known as the Back & Body Clinic)
Welcome to the first episode of 2023! God put it on my heart to dedicate the first month of this new year by hosting a “First Fruits” podcast series. In this podcast series, we will take every Monday and give the first of a different area of our lives to the Lord. The first area God put on my heart was rest. Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath. This is not a religious checklist; rather, it’s a gift from God.
PROCESS with these 3 Rs:
- Repent: "God, I repent for not taking a Sabbath day of rest. Please forgive me for not receiving this gift of rest. I receive your grace and forgiveness today."
- Rejoice: Thank God for rest. It was His idea.
- Revisit: What does rest look like for me in this season?
Resource: My book launch team is unofficially open and I have space to lead a group of women through an early release copy of my book, Image Restored. The first 100 to register get a physical advanced reader copy of my book. Anyone after that will get a digital copy. We will cap the group so I am giving time for my people, that’s YOU, to sign up and be part of that launch before I announce anything publicly. To learn more and register, head to ImageRestoredBook.com. The book trailer is now available on that page, as well!
Back by popular demand is our third annual Process and Pray series. Each December, we spend every Monday morning in a series where we process and pray through the year. Each week the focus will be different, but the theme of processing, praying, and praising will remain the same. I asked the Lord to show me four areas he wants us to process before we move into the new year. In this episode, we're finishing the series by giving God the dreams and desires of our hearts.
Process the following questions throughout the week in a journal -
- What dreams or desires of your heart came to pass this year?
- What dreams are still in your heart, but don’t seem to be coming to pass?
- Is it time to let that dream go OR do I need to stand in faith for it?
- What dream do you want to deposit in my heart for 2023?
Resource: I have a private invitation for my podcast listeners only. My book launch team is unofficially open, and I have space to lead 100 women through an early release copy of my book, Image Restored. I am giving time for my people, that’s YOU, to sign up and be part of that launch before I announce anything publicly. To learn more and register, head to ImageRestoredBook.com. The book trailer is now available on that page, as well!
Back by popular demand is our third annual Process and Pray series. Each December, we spend every Monday morning in a series where we process and pray through the year. Each week the focus will be different, but the theme of processing, praying, and praising will remain the same. I asked the Lord to show me four areas he wants us to process before we move into the new year. In this episode, we're evaluating if our values lined up with our resources in 2022.
Resources are anything we have in our hand - time, money, energy, and influence. Values are the core of who we are and what we do. Everyone has values, but we don’t always stop to ask what they are and if they are biblical.
Process the following questions throughout the week in a journal -
- What are my values?
- Are those values biblical?
- Did my values align with how I used my resources in 2022?
- God, what values and resources do you want me to take into 2023?
Resource:
I have a private invitation for my podcast listeners only! My book launch team is unofficially open, and I have space to lead 100 women through an early release copy of my book, Image Restored. I am giving time for my people, that’s YOU, to sign up and be part of that launch before I announce anything publicly. To learn more and register, head to ImageRestoredBook.com. The book trailer is now available on that page, as well!
Back by popular demand is our third annual Process and Pray series. Each December, we spend every Monday morning in a series where we process and pray through the year. Each week the focus will be different, but the theme of processing, praying, and praising will remain the same. I asked the Lord to show me four areas he wants us to process before we move into the new year. In this episode, we are looking at what worked and what victories we experienced in 2022.
Jesus cares about our past, present, and future. Let’s welcome Him into this journey. Pray, “Jesus, what victories do you want to remind me of from this year?”
Process these questions throughout the week in a journal:
- What victories or breakthroughs came in 2022?
- What went well that I want to carry into 2023?
- Thank God for these victories with your voice
- Tell someone about the goodness of God
Resource:
Would you like to hear behind-the-scenes footage and content that didn’t make it into my book? When you pre-order Image RESTored on Amazon or other retailers, you get access to a private podcast all about body image and other health-related topics. Head to imagerestoredbook.com to learn more, preorder, and join the email list so you can access that private podcast when it releases in the new year.
Back by popular demand is our third annual Process and Pray series. Each December, we spend every Monday morning in a series where we process and pray through the year. Each week the focus will be different, but the theme of processing, praying, and praising will remain the same. I asked the Lord to show me four areas he wants us to process before we move into the new year.
As a therapist, I like to start by looking back and processing the hard things so we can embrace the present and look forward to the future. In this episode, we are going to start by processing disappointments. We will also look at what didn’t work this year so we can let that go as we move into the new year. Jesus cares about our past, present, and future. Let’s start by welcoming Him into this journey.
Process these questions throughout the week in a journal:
- What disappointments did I experience in 2022?
- What didn’t work in 2022? Consider schedules, expectations, etc.
- Have I grieved this disappointment or numbed the pain with passive activities like eating, shopping, social media, or other avoidant activities?
- God, what do you want to redeem that was stolen in 2022?
Resource:
Would you like to hear behind-the-scenes footage and content that didn’t make it into my book? When you pre-order Image RESTored on Amazon or other retailers, you get access to a private podcast all about body image and other health-related topics. Head to imagerestoredbook.com to learn more, preorder, and join the email list so you can access that private podcast when it releases in the new year.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with artist and author Matthew West about his new book The God Who Stays. Matthew is a five-time GRAMMY nominee, a multiple ASCAP Christian Music Songwriter/Artist of the Year winner, and a 2018 Dove Award Songwriter of the Year (Artist) recipient. He has received an American Music Award, a Billboard Music Award, a K-LOVE Fan Award, and named Billboard’s Hot Christian Songwriter of the Year. Apart from his successful career as a musician, he is also an accomplished author, passionate father, and husband.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * In some seasons it can feel like God is distant, but He is the God who stays. Not only does He stay, He actively desires to spend time with us because He doesn't just love us, He likes us as well. * The thing we need, don't deserve, and that gives us hope is the grace of God. He is present in our failures. Our imperfections don’t disqualify us from His perfect love. * When we know that God is with us regardless of the situation, we are called to stay with others in their times of need.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Reflect on your own "blue couch moment" - the moment you accepted the love of Christ. He was the God who stays then and He's the God who is with you now. Remembering our "blue couch moment" is a reminder of His unfailing faithfulness.
Connect with Matthew: website | Instagram | Facebook
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This month we aren’t in a specific series. Instead, I feel the Lord directing me to share what He puts on my heart for the week. Today’s word is “you are secure.”
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is as follows: physiological needs, safety, love, belonging, esteem, and self-actualization.
Security is a basic need of all humans, especially women. As a Christian counselor, I see many women, myself included, who do not doubt our salvation, but we doubt our worth. We sing the song, “I am a child of God,” but we don’t act like it.
Process:
In the introduction of my book, Image Restored, I shared about a study that found a secure attachment to our creator improves body image and other insecurities. Spend some time today evaluating your secure attachment to God. Then start a servant versus secure list and allow God to reveal the places He wants you to trust in Him.
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This month we aren’t in a specific series. Instead, I feel the Lord directing me to share what He puts on my heart for the week. Also known as "a word in due season." Today’s word is “expect a miracle.”
Here's the Anchor Yale Bible Dictionary definition of a miracle:
"The definition of miracle in the Bible, then, is a literary definition: an extraordinary occurrence, attributable to God’s hand (which at times disrupts the order of creation), and which leaves a marked impression in the text; the criteria for determining what is to be considered a miracle are literary in character."
I am hungry to see miracles and the gifts of the Holy Spirit.
This week, try these two prayer prompts:
God, open my eyes to miracles all around me. (Consider keeping a “miracle journal.”)
God, how can I play a part in a miracle that You want to do in someone else’s life? Open my eyes to people around me who are praying for a miracle.
In most miracles, both man and God take part in the performance of the miracle such as in the plagues of Egypt (Exodus 7–11) or in bringing forth water from a rock (Exod 17:1–7). God wants to partner with us to perform miracles, He's just waiting for us to say yes. God blesses obedience.
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author Grace Valentine about her book "What Will They Think?". Not only is Grace an author, she's also a blogger, podcast host, and speaker. Her readers love that she is so relatable. They say her fresh voice helps them navigate their own faith and life, which in turn helps fulfill her mission to show others that Christianity is an adventure worth living. After growing up outside New Orleans, Louisiana, Grace attended Baylor University, graduating in 2018 with a degree in journalism. She now resides in Orlando, Florida, where she enjoys running and eating lots of sushi. Grace loves connecting with readers, so send her a message!
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Most of the younger generation of women don't have a healthy view of women in the Bible. Religion has made us believe that women are less, but there are multiple examples of powerful women in the Bible, some in status and some in faith. We can learn from them about how we are designed to have a voice and that God doesn't overlook us. We don't have to be the best to be used by God, we just need to be eager to serve Him with a bold heart. * No matter how old your voice is, it has value. If you're a loud person, you're not too much. Allow God to refine that gift and use it. If you're quiet, be bold and have confidence that the Holy Spirit is speaking through you and you will do amazing things. * It's okay to be ordinary. Your life isn't about proving you're worth loving, it's about your character and kindness. Regardless of status, you can speak love to the overlooked. * If you find yourself getting stuck by comparison, remember that you don't have to prove yourself to anyone when you're fulfilling God's purpose. Run your race. You miss out on your blessings when you get too distracted by what other people think. * Being obedient to God isn't boring. He isn't holding good back from you, He wants you to experience the fullness of life. Success is obedience. * Every generation can learn from one another. We're experiencing the same experiences in different ways.
Let’s Get Real Practical: In her book "What Will They Think?", Grace has a list of 40 things to remind you not to miss out on God’s best for your life. I go through a few of them in this section, so your Get Practical application this week is to ask the Holy Spirit which one or two you need to take to heart and apply in your life today.
Connect with Grace: website | Instagram | Facebook
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This month we aren’t in a specific series. Instead, I feel the Lord directing me to share what He puts on my heart for the week. Today’s word is “I Choose Joy”.
As counterintuitive as it sounds, joy is not determined by our circumstances. Joy is a choice. It's a choice to be joyful despite our circumstances. When we look at the scripture, joy is a fruit of the spirit. It's what separates us as believers in Christ and draws people to Him. On the surface, joy might seem like it's about your circumstances, but in reality, it's a state of being rather than an emotion. It's a result of choice. Joy is a gift from God. We can’t always explain it, but just like any gift, we have to choose to accept it.
Ask God today, "What area of my life do I need to choose joy?"
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This month we aren’t in a specific series. Instead, I feel the Lord directing me to share what He puts on my heart for the week. Today’s word is “persistent prayer.”
1 Thessalonians 5:17 says, “never stop praying.” (NLT) other translations say, “pray without ceasing.”
Something happens when we pray. What have you grown weary in praying for?
The salvation of a loved one? Healing in your body? Restoration of a relationship? Marriage reconciliation? Financial breakthrough? Freedom from bondage?
Take it to God in prayer today.
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
In this episode of Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with Jennifer Tucker. Jennifer is an illustrator, graphic designer, and author of Breath as Prayer: Calm Your Anxiety, Focus Your Mind, and Renew Your Soul. She creates graphics and art for Ann Voskamp and works for various clients including DaySpring, HarperCollins, and Ink & Willow. Her personal art and work reflect her journey towards health and healing, and she creates art to remind her own soul that God is with us, that we are loved and held and never alone. She lives in central Georgia with her husband, Mark, and daughters Emma and Lilly. Jennifer is a devoted follower of Jesus and an advocate for mental health.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Breath prayer has been around for centuries. It combines deep breathing (which calms our nervous system) and marries it with prayer (which connects our hearts to God). * If you were raised in a Christian household, you may feel shame around anxiety stemming from not being able to "cast all our cares on Him." Things changed for Jennifer when she recognized that there are physical symptoms of anxiety that show up in the body due to God's design of the nervous system. There is no shame in that. * God loves us and is always compassionate. Reading the scriptures through the eyes of a loving mother concerned for her daughter struggling with anxiety made it clear that the scriptures about anxiety were not a condemnation of her, but rather an invitation to rest in the peace and love of Christ. She began reading the Bible from a perspective of compassion rather than condemnation. * Breath is the source of our life. Scripture says God breathed life into us; now it's a gift that we can control to calm our minds to focus on Truth. * Breath prayers are not only for states of anxiousness, but a routine to develop in our daily lives. In life, we tend to get busy and forget to slow down and focus on the truth of God's Word. * Breath prayers are not a way to look inward to solve our problems, but rather upward to our Heavenly Father as our source of wisdom and guidance. It is also not a way to empty our mind of all thoughts, but rather to repeat the truth of the scripture to root in our hearts.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Practice breath prayer this week. If you are suffering, you do not suffer alone. Jesus is close when you are crushed.
Make this your breath prayer this week: (Inhale) You are close to the brokenhearted. (Exhale) You rescue crushed spirits.
Connect with Jennifer: website | Instagram | Facebook
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This is the last episode in our mini-series on Coping Skills to Calm your Nerves and Retrain your Brain.
Our final episode happens to be airing on Halloween, so I felt led to discuss the power of worship and shifting the atmosphere in our hearts, home, and workplace.
Worship is a weapon.
Worship releases worry.
Worship shifts the environment.
Worship sends the enemy running.
Ways to worship:
- Praise and worship. Even if you can’t sing it, let it play quietly in the background.
- Words as worship. Thank God throughout the day.
- Actions as worship. What do you spend the most time and energy worshipping?
- Dance, workout, work, whatever you do, do it all to the glory of God.
Resources:Pre-order Image RESTored
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
So far in The Coping Series, we have discussed bilateral stimulation, verbal and written processing, and exercise to calm your nervous system and reign in the runaway brain. Please go back and listen if you missed any of those episodes.
In this episode, we are discussing a coping skill that is a God-given way to cope with mental and emotional stress - Bible verse meditation.
Damage is done when people receive the message “If you would just pray more…” or “Here is a Bible verse.” Let’s look at both sides of this coin.
To the person giving the advice: Remember, this recipient is hurting. Listen first. Express empathy. Pray for them (no need to share you’re praying unless you feel led to). If you do bring up a verse, be sure it’s thoughtful and not condemning.
To the person receiving: If the takeaway message is full of shame, remember that’s not from God. Whether the person did or didn’t intend to relay that message, you get to choose what you receive.
God’s word and prayer are the most powerful coping tools we have been given. It’s just like the enemy to twist words so we pull back from something that could help. It’s not an either/or when it comes to mental health. It’s a both/and. Jesus heals and God’s Word comforts, and sometimes we also need professional help, and that’s ok. Extend grace to yourself and others.
Resources:Pre-order Image RESTored
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with the author of A Little Goes a Long Way and host of The Love Offering podcast, Rachael Adams. Rachael hopes to help women realize their God-given purpose and significance. She and her husband, Bryan, run a family business and farm in Kentucky with their two children, Will and Kate, and two doodle dogs. Her work has been featured on Crosswalk, iBelieve, Today Parenting, and YouVersion.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Women in particular struggle with wondering if the mundane things they're doing actually matter. The truth is that we are inherently significant because God created us, not because of our works. * Jesus did mundane things that significantly impacted the people around Him. We get to partner with Him to call out the gifts in the people around us and make mundane things extraordinary. * We tend to value the "highlight reels" of our lives and ignore the ordinary moments, but we often don't see the impact we have daily. Be faithful to do the little things every day and trust God to use them. * Little actions build on one another - that includes poor choices. If we justify the "little sins" in our lives, they will compound. * God purposefully chooses to do things little by little. We all start at zero, the important thing is to keep building. Ask the Lord what He wants you to begin. * The more time we spend with God in prayer, reading His Word, and worshiping, the more we will begin to find power in the mundane.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Write out Zechariah 4:10 and put it somewhere you can read it daily: "Do not despise these small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin."
Connect with Rachael Adams: website | Instagram | Facebook
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So far in our new mini-series on coping Skills to calm your nerves and retrain your brain we have discussed bilateral stimulation and verbal and written processing to calm your nervous system and reign in the runaway brain. Please go back and listen if you missed either of those episodes.
This week we are reclaiming territory on a coping skill that is a God-given way to cope with mental and emotional stress - exercise.
Benefits of Exercise
- Regular exercise can have a positive impact on depression, anxiety, and ADHD. It also relieves stress, improves memory, helps you sleep better, and boosts your overall mood.
- Exercise is a powerful depression fighter for several reasons. Most importantly, it promotes all kinds of changes in the brain, including neural growth, reduced inflammation, and new activity patterns that promote feelings of calm and well-being.
- Exercise is a natural and effective anti-anxiety treatment. It relieves tension and stress, boosts physical and mental energy, and enhances well-being by releasing endorphins.
- Since the body and mind are so closely linked, when your body feels better so will your mind.
- Evidence suggests that by really focusing on your body and how it feels as you exercise, you can actually help your nervous system become “unstuck” and begin to move out of the immobilization stress response that characterizes PTSD or trauma.
Practical Tips to Add Exercise
- Diversity is key.
- Go for a walk and talk to God, a friend, or your spouse
- Make it enjoyable. Be a kid again. Examples: trampoline, jump rope, dice games, ride bikes, collect shells on the beach, go for a hike
- Skip the elevator and take the stairs
- Park at the back of the parking lot
- Go to Costo with no list
- Walk during your lunch break or while your child is at soccer practice
- Call it your “get to,” not a “have to"
- Submit it to the Lord. Since our body is His temple, let’s ask Him to show us How to move in love.
Your body needs to move but LISTEN to it. Years of silencing our bodies cause us not to trust what it needs. Ask the Holy Spirit for guidance.
Resources:Pre-order Image RESTored
The Mental Health Benefits of Exercise download
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
We are in a new mini-series on coping skills to calm your nerves and retrain your brain. In the last episode, I introduced the concept of bilateral stimulation to calm your nervous system and reign in the runaway brain. Please go back and listen if you missed it because I will reference that more throughout this series.
This week I want to bring up the most underrated coping skill - verbal and written processing.
Why processing through journaling or talking is powerful:
- It gets it up and out. If you can’t talk about it, it owns you.
- When we stuff emotions, they find their way out somewhere.
- Bottling up your emotions can drain your physical energy. Your organs, tissues, muscles, endocrine glands, and skin are receptive to your emotional experiences, causing memories to be stored in your brain and your body.
- It helps you spot inaccurate thoughts. Sometimes just saying or writing it, we recognize it’s not true.
- It lets God and trusted loved ones into our struggle.
- It grows our faith to look back on old journal entries and see how God took what the enemy meant for evil and turn it for good.
Here are 3ways you can healthily process thoughts and emotions, plus a practical tip to implement each:
- Pray. In other words, talk to God.
Practical tip: Talk to God throughout your day. In the car, showering, walking, cooking, or folding laundry. - Seek wise counsel (a counselor or a trusted friend who won’t judge)
Practical tip: How to be someone a friend can process with in a healthy way:- Ask, “do you want me to listen or give feedback?”
- Be slow to give advice. Most people just need a listening ear and a hug.
- Keep their information safe. The quickest way to break a relationship is to reveal information that isn’t yours to share.
- Expressive writing - AKA JournalPractical tip: Try bullet point journaling, writing a note on your phone, put it in a Word document, add dates to reflect, use a coloring book that makes you happy and write shorthand notes on the sheets, or use a journaling Bible.
Resources:Pre-order Image RESTored
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm talking with the author of Take Back Your Joy: Fighting for Purpose When Life Is More Than You Can Handle, Nicole Jacobsmeyer. Through her authenticity and the sharing of her own struggles, Nicole encourages women to keep going when all seems lost. She believes that it’s possible to find lasting joy and purpose in Christ and that He is good no matter what life brings our way. She and her husband Andrew have 4 kids and reside in NC. They love being outdoors, baking chocolate chip cookies, and playing sports.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Finding joy is a process. Nicole found healing from her brokenness through serving others. Your brokenness doesn't disqualify you, it enables you to help other broken people. * We often don't share our deepest pains, so we feel isolated. The Bible calls us to share in one another's sufferings. When we are honest, people experiencing pain around us feel seen and we can heal together. * Sometimes you won't be able to find joy and that's okay. In those seasons, give yourself grace. * “You can have joy in the worst seasons because joy isn’t being fake happy; it’s this assurance that God is with us regardless of what we go through. That He is our rock and will equip us. He is extending grace, love, freedom, and healing – all we need comes from knowing His assurance brings us that joy." * Joy and happiness are different. Happiness is fleeting, but joy offers stability. * Thinking of our purpose during pain is virtually impossible. In retrospect, you can see some of how God is working to use the trauma and pain for His glory. That’s all we could pray for. It’s easy to talk about Him when things are great, but when we see Him in the hard times, that’s a testimony. * Be encouraged, this season won't last forever. It’s a journey and it’s hard, but a new chapter is coming. Keep enduring because you're pushing people to the Lord in the season you’re in now.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Why is processing through journaling or talking so powerful?
It gets it up and out. When we stuff our emotions, they come out somewhere. So why not let them out in a controlled manner?
It helps you spot inaccurate thoughts.
It lets God and trusted loved ones into our struggle. Go to God first.
It grows our faith to look back and see how God used evil for Good.
Connect with Nicole: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This month we are starting a new mini-series on coping skills to calm your nerves and retrain your brain. In this series, I will teach practical coping skills you can implement into your daily routine.
I encourage you to try them, even if they feel silly. Figuring out which coping skills work for you might take time and experimentation. I am not your counselor; these are simply ideas, so be sure to talk with your counselor about which coping skills are right for you.
As an EMDR-trained therapist, incorporating bilateral stimulation with coping skills is one of my favorite things to do with my patients.
In this episode, I want to teach you how to use butterfly hugs to calm your nervous system and reign in the runaway brain.
Butterfly hugs explained:
Place your right hand on the left side of your chest and your left hand on the right side of your chest.
Begin to tap, slowly and gently, right and left on your chest.
Focus on taking deep breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth. If you’re able to, please close your eyes.
Resources:
EMDR
Pre-order Image RESTored
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
REBROADCAST: Did you know that you have the power to control your thoughts? In this episode of Talk Therapy, I'm talking about changing the channel in your mind because our thoughts control our feelings and our feelings control our actions.
2 Corinthians 10:5, "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."
The Battlefield of the Mind Devotional
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael features a very special guest, my daughter, Ellie. Ellie Gilbert is a sophomore in high school who loves using her voice wherever God plants her. She loves to cheer, compete in speech and debate tournaments, and preach the gospel at youth events. In her downtime, you can find her working on her latest crochet project.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Creating a safe space for teens to have open conversations with their kids about hard topics means they're not relying on the internet and peers to be the authority in their lives. It gives the child the ability to ask more questions to find true understanding. * Awkwardness keeps teens from feeling safe to have hard conversations with their parents. Allow them to say it "wrong," then help them find the right words to express their thoughts and feelings. * It's hard for teens to bring up an opinion or thought that may not align with their parents. Teens should approach these sensitive topics with respect and feel comfortable asking the why so they can make decisions with better understanding. * Finding identity and the fear of making the wrong choices in the process is a teen's hardest struggle. What they need is someone to guide and encourage them that their circumstances don't define them - God does. * Teens have a stubbornness that can make it hard to receive encouragement. Pray that God changes their heart posture to receive the truth. * Teens should remember that this phase of life is not forever. It's a time to learn, grow, and connect. Encourage them to keep their eyes on the big picture. * The mother-daughter relationship is just that - a relationship, not a dictatorship. We should desire to build each other up and help one another, learn from each perspective.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Ways to invest in a relationship with anyone from another generation who doesn't think or act like you:
- Don't take yourself or each other too seriously.
- Have fun and teach each other new things.
- Have real talk. Be honest and speak the truth in love.
- Listen more than you speak
- Be a safe space. Refrain from overreacting.
- Ask - Do you want me to listen or problem-solve?
- Invest in the relationship. (Try reading a book together.)
- Pray together.
- Seek therapy for yourself to get healing.
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
REBROADCAST: In this episode of Talk Therapy, I'm talking about the one thing that may be missing from your life - Jesus.
If you're a follower of Christ, I encourage you to lean into Jesus more this week. There is power in His name. Whether it's a work situation, a struggling marriage, or a health challenge - whatever it is you're facing, say the name of Jesus. He is our counselor, our healer, and our peace.
If you don't know Jesus, at the end of this episode I offer a simple prayer to invite Him into your heart. If you make that decision or have more questions, please reach out to me. I'd love to welcome you into the body of Christ and get you connected with more resources!
One Minute Pause app
Connect with Rachael on her website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
In this week's Talk Therapy episode, I want to talk to you about something I've wrestled with for much of my life - fear of man. It’s another layer of image. “What do they think of me?” Not just appearance, but the root question is, “Am I enough?”
“If we look beneath the surface of the fear of man (a.k.a. people pleasing), we often find pride, false humility, and an obsession with self-image.
Verses to stand on:
Proverbs 29:25: Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe.”
Psalm 25:15: My eyes are ever on the Lord, for only He will release my feet from the snare.”
Resource:
I want to invite you to join our JOYmail community. Once a month, I send a brief newsletter with faith-filled encouragement, my favorite finds, and therapy resources. Go to rachaelgilbert.com to join or click the link in today’s show notes.
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm talking with Anthony Evans about his book When Faith Meets Therapy. For two decades, Anthony has voiced the gospel with a melodic, thought-provoking style, and has emerged as one of Christian music’s premier worship leaders and singers. Along the way, Anthony has released ten solo projects (the last two climbing all the way to #1 on Billboard’s Top Gospel Album charts), released his first two books (Unexpected Places and Divine Disruption), produced numerous music videos, acted in four movies, and even performed as “Beast” in Disney’s Hollywood Bowl production of Beauty and the Beast. In addition, he has created inspirational events in collaboration with his father, beloved pastor and international speaker, Dr. Tony Evans; his sisters, Priscilla Shirer and Chrystal Evans Hurst; and his brother, author and speaker Jonathan Evans.
In more recent years, Anthony has been working and producing in Los Angeles, where he appeared on NBC’s The Voice. His time on the show led to him being discovered and asked to perform and produce vocals for various major artists and networks. In addition to vocal production, Anthony has been enlisted as a talent producer for an assortment of popular reality and competition shows. This sojourn in LA has led him to think more progressively about his music and ministry—he desires to communicate in terms that connect with people spiritually, no matter where they are in their journey with the Lord, without compromising his own faith and message. This focus has allowed Anthony to use his one-of-a-kind voice to reverberate through the church and out its doors to impact the world beyond.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Sometimes our faith can keep us from addressing the root of our problems. We feel shame that praying and reading the Bible aren't changing us, but we need practical tools to process our thoughts and emotions. * The church is often not seen as a safe place for people struggling with their mental health because of a lack of empathy and authenticity, which creates shame. We can create a safe space when we find empathy by understanding their story. * When people show you who they are, believe them. Don't be a victim of your own compassion. * When we experience pain and grief, it's natural to want to numb those feelings, but you must feel to heal. * Feelings aren't good or bad, they're indicators. Therapy is a safe place to experience your feelings without judging them. * Feelings are valid but temporary. We can trust in God's truth. "When you start walking in the truth in spite of how you feel, your feelings will follow your feet." * Be as kind to yourself as you would be to someone else who is struggling. Give yourself grace. It’s about progress, not perfection. Making mistakes is a sign you’re trying. Do what you can and God will do what you can’t.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Tips for finding a therapist -
Pray for the right therapist
Look at fees and consider your budget. Many therapists have interns with reduced rates that are supervised by licensed therapists. Some offer payment on a sliding scale.
Make sure they’re licensed (or under someone licensed) in your state.
Read the bio on their site and see if what matters to them matters to you.
(If you're looking for a Christian counsel, check AACC.net)
Tips for getting the most out of therapy -
Ask questions that matter to you.
Be vocal about techniques that work and ones that don’t.
Ask for book and podcast recommendations.
Keep a journal and include thoughts, feelings, dreams, and anything you’d like to process in your session.
Set recurring appointments. Therapy is not just for people going through a crisis, it’s a lifestyle.
Connect with Anthony: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
Usually each month I start a new series, but for this episode, I felt the Lord ask me to pivot to a message focused on taking action.
Are you in or out? Hot or cold? Yes or no?
God has been convicting me to stop spewing lukewarm water. I’m so afraid of offending that I’ve stopped standing up boldly for Christ. This in and out wreaks havoc on our mental health. The back and forth is exhausting and causes confusion within us.
Reflect:
Are you in or out?
What area is God calling you to stand up and say, “I’m in”?
Resource:
For more resources on grace, faith, and therapy visit rachaelgilbert.com. There you will find free downloads, resources, and information about my counseling services.
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This is the final episode in my mini-series all about faith and mental health and this time I'm discussing diagnosis versus identity.
"Mental illness is a diagnosis, not an identity or destiny." - Holley Gerth
The purpose of a diagnosis is to establish a treatment plan. Otherwise, we are just throwing darts at a board that we can’t see. But the diagnosis is NOT an identity or a destiny. In fact, faith and mental health mean hope and a future.
The enemy gives a snapshot of the now and says “this is it” while God sees the whole, big picture and says, “look up child, it’s not over.”
Reflect:
Have you received a mental diagnosis that left you feeling shame or hopeless? Have you extended grace to someone in your life who received a mental diagnosis?
Please remember to approach this subject with grace, humility, and surrender to the Trinity. Healing comes through wisdom, understanding, doctors, therapy, medications, natural supplements, AND Jesus, scripture, and prayer. It’s not an either/or, it’s a both/and.
Resource:
For more resources on grace, faith, and therapy visit rachaelgilbert.com. There you will find free downloads, resources, and information about my counseling services.
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm talking with my friend, Karen Harmon. Karen is a wife, homeschool mom, business owner, physical therapist, speaker, and writer who also serves her local church on the worship team, as a leader over several small groups, and in the media department doing on-camera work and voiceovers. She owns Function360 which provides specialized physical rehabilitation and wellness consultations for a variety of patients. Karen has spoken at conferences and seminars and has sat on several live events and curriculum panels discussing anything from leadership to motherhood to ministry. She has also contributed several articles for various publications and websites. With transparency and humor, Karen loves to encourage and empower women to passionately pursue Jesus and their God-given dreams and callings through all their many roles.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Being multi-passionate about things doesn’t mean you do everything at the same time. Instead of balancing, ask what it looks like to prioritize and merge different roles. If you struggle to define your priorities, ask what cost you’re willing to pay and what the Lord wants you to pursue. * If you wake up miserable every day, your priorities are out of order. When we’re faithful to keep our priorities in line, God is faithful to bless every other area around us as well. * Don’t look at the outcome as success, look at obedience as success. “Kingdom currency is obedience.” * Are you living in a state of striving or a state of surrender? Check your motivation. Are you doing it for the Lord and to serve His people? Think about how you can serve. It will bring humility. * Ask what God has for you in this season instead of comparing yourself to others. God can use your missteps; take the step anyway and ask what you can learn from the experience. Obedience brings blessing. * To pursue multiple passions well, pray, plan, then pursue. It's important to find systems that work for you and your family through each season. * You can have a good dream that is also a God dream, but it’s not the right time. Don’t feel like you're behind, enjoy where you’re at. God has not forsaken your dreams or forgotten your calling. He sees you. He’s faithful.
Resources Mentioned: 3 Action Steps to Overcome Fear & Pursue your God-Given Dreams
Let’s Get Real Practical: To help determine what stays and what goes when you’re entering a new season, work through these steps –
First, write down everything you’re committed to in the coming months, then circle the non-negotiables.
Next, cross out things you can delegate or things you simply don’t feel at peace to continue doing and make a plan to exit that commitment graciously and with excellence.
Whatever items are left, seek prayer and wise counsel.
Connect with Karen: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
In the first week of this series, we discussed how faith is your foundation for solid mental health. Last week our topic was grace-based faith and your mental health. Today our topic is learning how to activate the trinity.
Our cognitive triangle and the Holy Trinity reflect one another -
Cognitive triangle: your thoughts affect your feelings, and feelings affect your behaviors.
Trinity effect: Father (the foundation), Son (shame carrier; grace), and Holy Spirit (our helper). Three in one, yet each plays a unique role in our lives.
"The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace." Romans 8:6
Reflect:
What part of the trinity do you need to activate in your mental health?
Resource:
For more resources on grace, faith, and therapy visit rachaelgilbert.com. There you will find free downloads, resources, and information about my counseling services.
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
Last week we discussed how faith is your foundation for solid mental health. This week our topic is grace-based faith and your mental health.
Faith without grace will wreak havoc on your mental, emotional, and spiritual health. In Ephesians, the Bible reminds us that we're saved by grace through faith so that no one can boast.
Beware of boasting that points the glory back to you. If I take the shame when I fall I will also take the credit when I stand. God is the only one worthy of honor. It is by grace through our faith that we are able to stand. May we never lose sight of that.
Reflect:
What’s your definition of grace?
What’s the Bible’s definition of grace?
Resource:
For more resources on grace, faith, and therapy visit rachaelgilbert.com. There you will find free downloads, resources, and information about my counseling services.
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
REBROADCAST: This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm chatting with bestselling author and speaker, Nicki Koziarz. As a part of Proverbs 31 Ministries, she speaks nationally at conferences, retreats, and meetings and hosts her own podcast. An evangelist at heart, Nicki inspires others to become the best version of who God created them to be. Nicki and her husband and three girls run a small farm just outside of Charlotte, North Carolina, which they affectionately call The Fixer Upper Farm.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * “The timing of God is never rushed by the impatience of man.” Although the idea for Flooded was the concept for her first book, it was rejected several times. Instead, she wrote it in the midst of deep loss, grief, and stress. * After losing her mom to cancer and her brother to suicide just two years apart, Nicki's faith was shaken. Doubt started stirring inside of her and she wondered how she could trust God again. * When it comes to our faith, we have to be intentional about making decisions that strengthen us and combat the doubt inside of us. * Wishful thinking uses scripture as a band-aid by applying promises God made to others to our situations. Biblical hope is taking the time to understand the scriptures, which promises are for us, and what we can claim through faith today. * For every struggle we face, there’s someone in scripture who’s gone through it who can teach what it’s like to overcome with faith in God. She was drawn to the story of Noah who made 5 steps of faith. * Noah's first step was walking with God. Walking with God is a private, holy place where we decide to get into the trenches with God. This is where we get our strength. * Noah's second step was listening to God. It's easy to use the noise around us as comfort or distraction. It’s an incredible spiritual discipline to practice being still with God. * The voice of God will never tell you anything that contradicts scripture or anything that goes against His character. * The brain never stops changing – you can stop believing something at any point. Rising above doubt will require you to retrain your brain. * You can’t protect yourself from naysayers, but it’s up to you what you do with their words. * If you're struggling with doubt, you’re not alone. * “God, if I have it wrong show me the right way. But if I have it right, help me to stand still until I have this promise fulfilled.” * There are times when we get it wrong and we should admit that. We need to do the hard work of being still and wait for growth.
Let’s Get Real Practical: When your emotions are flooded, start by taking time out and doing something to calm down, then practice deep breathing exercises or progressive muscle relaxation.
Connect with Nicki: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week we're starting a new mini-series all about faith and mental health. Faith is your foundation for solid mental health. No matter your beliefs, everyone has faith in something or someone. Even atheists have faith in themselves.
I have a simple question for you today. Your answer will lay the foundation for this entire series and your mental health.
What’s your faith in?
What would you like your faith to be in?
Resource mentioned:
3 action steps to get unstuck so you can move forward toward your dreams
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
REBROADCAST: This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author Charlotte Gambill. Charlotte has an infectious love for life, a deep love for people, and zealous love for God’s House. Her passion is to build the local church across the earth, to see people reach their full potential, and to develop and strengthen leadership. Charlotte is known for her practical, humorous, and passionate application of God’s Word. Charlotte is an author, speaker, pastor, and mother, she leads Life Church in England with her husband Steve and together they have two children, Hope Cherish and Noah Brave.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Charlotte was inspired to write Today I Choose after her everyday choices became restricted because of the pandemic. Instead, she chose her confession, her attitude, and her actions. What started with her making videos on her phone became a gathering point for people all across the world to daily join in and together choose faith over fear, connection over isolation, and trust in the trials. * We are being fed by fear through the news and media, but we have the choice of how we respond to what we hear. We also have the power to make better choices about what information we allow in our lives. * Little, deliberate choices change the atmosphere of our homes. * The pandemic exposed that our online and shallow connections are not enough to sustain us. Connection won't just happen, we have to do the work of being open, vulnerable, and committed. * Connections don't develop overnight. Invest in the people who are willing to walk with you. Assess where you are and where you're going and listen to the Holy Spirit's guidance. * Each friendship plays a role in the story of our lives. Sometimes releasing someone makes room for someone else to take that role in your life. * We may think we don’t have time for connection, but that person may be an answer to prayer for our time management. * Everyone is a leader, but your leadership doesn't show up until you decide to show up. Decide to lead today.
Resources Mentioned: The Collective Mentorship Program: The Collective is the opportunity to choose your company, cultivate your conversation and deepen your commitment to gaining the wisdom you need for the road ahead.
Let's Get Real Practical: I have 2 questions and one action step for you today.
What area of your life feels heavy today?
What are you choosing to believe around that area?
Now, reframe your choices around the area you identified.
Connect with Charlotte: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
REBROADCAST: This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm excited to talk with Dr. Caroline Leaf about her new book Cleaning Up Your Mental Mess. She is a communication pathologist and cognitive neuroscientist with a Masters and Ph.D. in Communication Pathology and a BSc Logopaedics, specializing in cognitive and metacognitive neuropsychology. Since the early 1980s, she has researched the mind-brain connection, the nature of mental health, and the formation of memory. She was one of the first in her field to study how the brain can change (neuroplasticity) with directed mind input. Dr. Leaf is also the bestselling author of Switch on Your Brain, Think Learn Succeed, Think and Eat Yourself Smart, and many more. She teaches at academic, medical, and neuroscience conferences, churches, and to various audiences around the world. Dr. Leaf is also involved in the global ECHO movement, which trains physicians worldwide on the mind-brain-body connection, mental health, and how to avoid physician burnout.
Dr. Leaf is currently conducting clinical trials using the 5-step program she developed while in private practice to further demonstrate the effectiveness of mind-directed techniques to help relieve mental ill-health problems such as anxiety, depression, and intrusive thoughts. The primary aim of these trials is to make mental health care more affordable, applicable, and accessible worldwide, and to reduce the stigma around mental health.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * The benefit we get from exercise is determined by our minds. * The book was inspired by the research Dr. Leaf did to determine what can actually change when we renew our minds, as well as how that impacts the brain, body, and how we function in life. * Mind and brain are separate. Your brain is physical; your mind is your thinking, feeling, and choosing. Your mind produces thoughts in your brain. * A neurocycle helps allow you to track thoughts and behaviors. * Once we connect with wisdom, we can better observe our behavior and then analyze it. * Like a tree has branches, thoughts have memories. * If you want to find the root, look for warning signals like frustration, irritation, depression, and anger. Don’t push them aside – inspect them. Suppressing warning signals causes physical damage to the brain. * Analyze your physical symptoms like stomach problems, tension, and rushing adrenaline. Also, check behaviors like non-verbal communication. * Mental health is not a disease. The label is leading is mismanagement of health. Misery has become medicalized and treatment is typically symptom-focused, which is great for the body, but not the mind. * The quick-fix mentality of symptom treatment has led to suppression. * We are wired for love. Negative thoughts physically vibrate incorrectly in the brain and cause inflammation that affects the immune system and how we function. * Jesus modeled pushing through and digging into the difficult. There is not a quick fix. The only way out is through. Embrace, process, and reconceptualize. * Don’t be scared of depression and anxiety. Instead, see them as helpful messengers. * Renewing your mind is a lifestyle. * Switch - 21-Day Brain Detox App
Dr. Leaf's 5 Steps to Reduce Anxiety, Stress, and Toxic Thinking:
- Gather awareness - become aware of emotional and physical warning signals
- Reflect - ask, answer, and discuss. Get to the core.
- Write it down. It helps you get into the depths of why you think this, what you’re doing, and how you feel.
- Recheck
- Activate mental reach - bringing order out of the chaos
Let's Get Real Practical: Let's get practical by addressing one area of your life that you know God is calling you to take your thoughts captive.
Action steps for this week: Identify what area of your life in which you feel stuck. Ask if your thinking in that area is toxic. Then write down the thought and replace it with the truth.
Connect with Dr. Caroline Leaf: website | Instagram | Facebook | podcast
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REBROADCAST: This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with international minister and best-selling author, John Bevere. He and his wife, Lisa, are the founders of Messenger International--a ministry committed to developing uncompromising followers of Christ who transform our world. John's heart to strengthen the local church has led to over 40 million translated resources being given to pastors and leaders in developing nations. When he's home in Colorado, you can find John playing card games with his family or trying to convince Lisa to take up golf.
We're talking about:
- Everyone has been given unique gifts to fulfill the calling on their life. Your goal should be to identify your gifts, develop them, then multiply them.
- There’s no a separation between secular and sacred ministries.
- The anointing is the enhancer of our gifts. We may be very gifted, but without anointing, we can’t move people at their core. It’s the difference between natural impact and eternal impact.
- God anticipates that we multiply our giftings. Over 50% of Christians don’t know they’re supernaturally gifted. If they do, they think it’s automatic.
- "In serving God, there is always a testing period before we are anointed or appointed."
- We need to study the word to understand the inner workings of the body of Christ. The parts of the body that are unseen are more valuable than the parts that are seen and the entire body must work together.
- God equates faithfulness with multiplication and laziness with maintenance. He doesn't micromanage us, He has made us stewards of our gifts.
- We multiply our gifts when we ask God every day what He would have us do.
Let's get real practical:
This week's exercise is included in my Intentional Influencer workbook.
Ask yourself what gifts, passions, and talents you possess and look for threads. Don't forget to tag me on Instagram so I can see what you learned!
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with John on his website, Instagram or Facebook
Connect with Rachael on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
REBROADCAST: This week on Real Talk with Rachael we talk with Alli Worthington about her new book “Standing Strong: A Woman's Guide to Overcoming Adversity and Living with Confidence“. Alli Worthington's goal is to help women live the life they were created to live. She lives outside Nashville with her husband, Mark, their five sons, and the only golden retriever who refuses to retrieve. She's a popular Christian women's speaker who travels the country sharing her humor, practical advice, and encouragement. She hosts her top-rated weekly podcast, The Alli Worthington Show, and brings us friends she loves, experts to learn from, and coaches listeners in life, business, and faith.
We’re talking about:
- Self-empowerment can be as crippling as self-doubt.
- You can’t let everything rely on your ability to hustle, God is the one that helps you across the finish line.
- Make sure the people you’re listening to are pointing the way to Jesus.
- God’s vision for us is not passive, but strong and active.
- Disappointing others is not a sin, sometimes it’s exactly what God needs you to do.
- Alli counts down from 5 when trying to get herself to do something unpleasant, learned from “The 5 Second Rule Book” by Mel Robbins.
- There’s a process from the anointing to the appointing.
- If your thoughts are shaming or critical, it’s not of God.
- Playing small is not being humble and can sometimes be an act of disobedience.
To find out more about Called Creatives, visit their website.
Don't forget to text “Superpower” to 55444 to get a free quiz from Alli!
Text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Alli on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
Connect with Rachael on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
REBROADCAST: This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm chatting with author Lisa Whittle about her new book The Hard Good: Showing Up for God to Work in You When You Want to Shut Down. Lisa has published eight books and her wit and bold bottom-line approach have made her a sought-after Bible teacher. She is also the creator of a companion video Bible study for Jesus over Everything. A pastor’s daughter and longtime ministry leader in issues relevant to the church, Lisa is the founder of Ministry Strong and the popular Jesus over Everything podcast, which debuted in the top 25 of Christian podcasts. Her love runs deep to see people pursue Jesus for life, grow deep roots of faith, and walk strong in the midst of a world that so often seems to have gone crazy. She and her family live in North Carolina.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * "The Hard Good" is the stuff that is hard and most spiritually transformative if we allow God to use it and the emotions/feelings that thwart us in the process of change. * "God anoints and appoints, but usability is up to us." * Some things are just hard, but not spiritually transformative. The things God wants to use in our lives are often the hard things. But we can better endure the hard when we know there’s a purpose behind it. * We tend to live ignoring our feelings or feeling controlled by them. People of faith have often struggled in this area because of the false idea that it dishonors their faith. But the creator of the universe made us with emotions and feelings, so He’s the one to help us regulate them. * We need to have more hard conversations in the church about abuse, widows, refugees, race, etc. When the church won’t have tough conversations, the world leads the conversation and the church is left to respond when it should be leading. * As a Christian, you are called to make disciples wherever you have influence. Encourage hard conversations in the church and pray for your leaders. If you feel your church isn't aligning with your values, it may be time to leave. * “Instead of silencing tough conversations, let’s silence the fear of taking them on.” * We all fear getting into a hard conversation because we don’t know how it will turn out. If something continues to compel you after praying about it, it's probably time to address it. Praying and being in tune with the Holy Spirit is the best way to ensure a good conversation. * Before engaging online remember that anything that offers help apart from the power of God is not helpful. It will end in disaster because it’s a human providing a solution. Take time to process and pray before posting.
Let's Get Real Practical: It's time to face hard conversations head-on without fear. Ask God to show you what tough conversations He’s inviting you into and use these 3 tips to engage - pray, listen to the other person, and reflect what they said for clarification.
Resources Mentioned: Episode 60: Jesus Over Everything with Lisa Whittle
Connect with Lisa: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
REBROADCAST: I don’t know a person who has never dealt with jealousy. In fact, most of us think it’s cute to say “Oh my goodness I am so jealous of your shoes…where did you get them?”.
However, God showed me 3 problems with jealousy that when left unresolved will wreak havoc in our life:
- Jealousy is “me” minder rather than “kingdom” minded.
- Jealousy robs us of our joy and blessings.
- Jealousy keeps us from entering into intimate relationships with those with whom we are jealous.
NEW INSIGHT: we can rebuke a jealous spirit! It’s not from God and we do not have to receive it.
Verses to meditate:
- Then I observed all the work and ambition motivated by envy. What a waste! Smoke. And spitting into the wind. (Ecclesiastes 4:4)
- Make a careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given, and then sink yourself into that. Don’t be impressed with yourself. Don’t compare yourself to others. Each of you must take responsibility for doing the best you can with your own life. (Galatians 6:4-5)
- Surely resentment destroys the fool, and jealousy kills the simple. (Job 5:2)
- A peaceful heart leads to a healthy body; jealousy is like cancer in the bones. (Proverbs 14:30)
- Anger is cruel, and wrath is like a flood, but jealousy is even more dangerous. (Proverbs 27:4)
Be sure to download this resource I have created that is FREE to download for a limited time only. It is a Biblical Body Image coloring book! To download it, head to rachaelgilbert.com/biblicalbodyimage.
REBROADCAST: This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm chatting with Pastor Tim Ross about his new book Upset the World. Tim is the lead pastor of the multi-ethnic, multi-generational Embassy City Church in Irving, TX. Tim speaks both nationally and internationally strengthening believers with the Good News of Jesus Christ. He began preaching at the age of 20 years old and has already impacted the lives of hundreds of thousands of people. His dynamic teaching style and uncanny ability to make people understand the gospel message is the reason why he has been such an asset to ministries across cultural and denominational lines. Tim is happily married to Juliette, his bride since May 1st, 1999 and they have two sons, Nathan and Noah.
We're talking about: * Tim's background and how he came to Christ. * Asking God to help us crave His word like we crave whatever we're addicted to. * How a verse in Acts inspired him to write his book Upset the World. * Jesus upsets people's worlds with His message of love and hope. * Connecting personal trauma to the trauma of salvation - both upset our lives * "Once [Jesus] has upset your life, He'll ask you to upset others." * The biggest way we can upset people's lives as part of our day-to-day rhythm is to do good. * 2 keys for recognizing the Holy Spirit's nudge - the suggestion is really good and it's intimidating, but keeps pressing. * Fall in love with planting the seed of God's love in people's lives. You're not responsible for the harvest, only the sowing. * Upset means "to turn over," but from heaven's perspective, when things are upside down, they're right-side up. * You break down barriers and build relationships with you destroy stereotypes by listening and meeting people where they are. * Using social media to spread hope instead of debating over opposing viewpoints. * Encouragement to open your heart and let God upset you again.
Connect with Tim on his website, Instagram or Facebook
Connect with Rachael on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
In the first two episodes, we discussed the real reasons we avoid hard conversations and why we need to have them. This week we are diving into how to have healthy and hard conversations.
All the tips I am going to share today are simple and practical but may take time and practice to implement. It’s okay if you don’t nail them all the time but circle back to them before having a hard conversation to see if there is one you would like to improve on for that situation.
Here are 10 simple steps to have a hard yet healthy conversation:
- Pray first and always
- Start simple (Discuss ONE problem at a time and be SPECIFIC.)
- Ask for a good time to talk (choose calm moments rather than when either of you is stressed, tired, or hungry)
- Try your best to do it in person or on the phone. Emails and texts often get misinterpreted
- Come with an open and teachable heart
- Use “I statements”. This takes away the blame of “you never”. Use this simple sentence structure “I feel (insert emotion) when you (insert situation or behavior).” Here is a YOU vs I example, “You’re so closed off. We need to talk more.” With “I” statement: “I feel lonely when we don’t talk.”
- Avoid words like “always” and “never”
- Avoid hurtful body language (eye-rolling, scowling, mocking, crossed arms)
- Tell them you value the relationship too much to not bring up this thing that is coming between you.
- Thank them for listening.
Conversation Challenge:
- Go back to where we started: do you struggle with avoiding these hard conversations? Be brave and choose to have one hard conversation this week.
- Remember, start simple and small. Don’t practice all 10 steps at once. If all you can do is pray and ask the Holy Spirit to give you the words you need to say…that will be enough.
- Share this episode with a friend. You might even share it with someone with who you need to have a hard conversation. You can let them know it would mean a lot to you if they listened before you talked. Then your first conversation could be about what God spoke to you in this series.
Resource mentioned:
Communication guide
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
We are in the middle of a mini-series all about hard conversations. Last week we discussed the real reasons we avoid them. This week we are diving into why we need to have them.
I’m coming to you today from the place of both a therapist and a person with personal experience in this area.
Why we need them:
- Debunk assumptions and expose invisible walls
- Restore relationships
- Release relationships
Conversation Challenge:
- Think about one relationship in your life that matters to you. It matters because God has put that person in your life and He has asked you to invest in the relationship.
- Do you feel a distance in that relationship? Would you like to be closer?
- Ask God to highlight one thing you could bring to attention in that relationship.
- Pray over that relationship this week.
Resource mentioned:
Communication guide
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author John Eldredge about his new book "Resilient: Restoring Your Weary Soul in These Turbulent Times." John is a bestselling author and counselor. He is also president of Wild at Heart, a ministry devoted to helping people discover the heart of God and recover their own hearts in God’s love. John and his wife, Stasi, live near Colorado Springs, Colorado.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Most people don't think of going through a pandemic as trauma, but it is. It's a global trauma that is triggering past unaddressed personal traumas. * When you are facing a stressful time, you have to tap into your reserves. But at some point, you have to replenish those reserves. We need to address our soul needs so we can have strength for the next challenge. * Going through trauma doesn't make you tougher for the next trauma; it sensitizes you. When a past trauma is triggered, it will likely show up first emotionally. You may notice different feelings and wonder why they're happening. The good news is acknowledging those feelings moves us toward healing. Don't be discouraged. Practice awareness, listen to your heart, and work through it. * Emotions are the voice of your heart - welcome them. Suppressing emotions is exhausting. If you want to live a freer life, let them out. * Practical soul care looks like moving your body, going outside, and getting off your phone and away from the news. If you are paralyzed by anxiety or numb to your emotions, seek professional care to help you process them in a healthy way. * Chronic disappointments accumulate grief. Name and write down your disappointments and recognize them as losses. Acknowledge that those things matter. It doesn't have to be a long process. * God is able to give our souls supernatural strength and resilience and it's readily available. The soul is healed through union with God. All resilience, well-being, perspective, and joy comes through our union with Jesus. * There are 2 ways to chase resilience – training programs or cultivating union with Jesus and allowing Him to heal you. If you create the space, God will meet you there. One of the simplest things a human soul can do is love God. * There are 3 layers of our being - the shallows, the midlands, and the depths. Most of us live in the shallows which come with a myriad of distractions throughout our day. The midlands are where your hopes, dreams, longings, and heartaches are. The depth is where love dwells and where God lives. If you want to commune with Him, you have to ignore the distractions of the shallow and surrender to Him the midlands. Find a place of love in your heart. We don’t have to look far to find the presence of God. * When we’re depleted, we’re vulnerable to our enemy. People are giving up on God, but that’s not you. Your enemy is trying to get you to deconstruct. Instead of pulling away from God move toward Him. He is the only safe place in a stormy world.
Resources Mentioned: Ep. 63: Get Your Life Back with John Eldredge
Talk Therapy: Process & Pray Through 2020
American Association of Christian Counselors
One Minute Pause app
Let’s Get Real Practical: Ask these questions and reflect:
What disappointments have I experienced through this pandemic?
What was lost in the last few years?
Have you addressed the loss or numbed it?
God, what do You want to redeem?
Connect with John: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This is the first episode in a new mini-series all about hard conversations.
This week I'm talking about the real reasons we avoid hard conversations. Contrary to what we lead ourselves to believe, we are not always taking the higher road by not saying anything. Having healthy, hard conversations is taking the road less traveled and your relationships will thank you for doing so.
Here are just a FEW of the reasons I believe we avoid them:
- They require things we are afraid to give: vulnerability, humility, forgiveness, responsibility, boundaries
- A healthy hard conversation requires us to self-reflect.
- We look for quick fixes. A hard conversation doesn’t offer an easy out. The easy way out looks like gossiping about the situation or person but never bringing it to their direct attention. It also can look like harboring bitterness, resentment, or purposefully distancing yourself. But sweeping things under the rug ruin not only our relationship in the long run but also any other new relationships that come in because of unresolved conflict.
Conversation Challenge:
- What are you afraid of when you think of having a hard conversation? Take time to self-reflect and see what you can take personal responsibility for this week.
- "God, show me any fears or thoughts not from you about having hard conversations."
Resource mentioned:
Communication guide
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REBROADCAST: This week I've really felt God urging me to tell you this - you have the authority to stand your ground, especially in the territories God has entrusted you with.
Through the power of Christ, you can tell the enemy that he cannot take any more territory that has not been given to him.
What is a territory that the enemy has been messing with? I'm standing with you in prayer!
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author Becky Thompson. Not only is Becky a bestselling author, but she's also the creator of the Midnight Mom Devotional community gathering more than one million moms in nightly prayer. She has become a voice for modern Christian womanhood, speaking about the struggle of balancing life as a wife, mother, and daughter of God. Becky lives in Oklahoma with her husband, Jared, and their three children.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * The Holy Spirit is a co-equal member of the trinity. If the Holy Spirit shows up, it should stir in our hearts the same type of adoration and awe as Jesus walking into the room. * People are hesitant about engaging with the Holy Spirit because others have expressions that seem radical when God comes close. "Our expectations do not confine God." * We think surrendering to the Holy Spirit means we'll lose control, but we're actually in more control when we allow the God who knows all things and loves us to lead us. * When we accept the Holy Spirit's invitation to partner with Him, we get to know Him better and learn to love Him in a way that we can only understand when He guides us. This is what a life awakened to His spirit looks like. * As we grow and mature, we look around and ask how the world around us needs us to know God as deeply and personally as we can. How can the people around us experience God's love through what we know of Him to be true? * "The gifts of the Holy Spirit are given to us so He can move through us." It’s our responsibility to learn how to use them so the body can be whole and can function in its fullness. * You already know the Holy Spirit if you know Jesus - He's the one that bought you into the relationship. The Holy Spirit is how Jesus comes close to us. It's through Him we experience God.
Let’s Get Real Practical: What comes up for you when we discuss the topic of the Holy Spirit? Be honest. Write your answer down.
What do you want to come up when you think of the Holy Spirit?
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This month I've been doing a series all about burnout. I interviewed author and therapist Dr. Amy O’Hana about this topic earlier this month. You can listen to that episode here.
I am using her book for this series, and it’s called "Beyond Burnout: What to Do When Your Work Isn’t Working for You.”
We are wrapping up the third area where burnout shows up in our lives and that is loss of meaning.
In this episode, I walk you through a timeline activity and ask you these 2 important questions:
Which of these three signs that we discussed burnout are present in your life today?
How can you practice being a human being rather than a human doing?
Resource mentioned:
Beyond Burnout: What to Do When Your Work Isn’t Working for You
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
We are in a series all about burnout. I interviewed author and therapist Dr. Amy O’Hana about this topic, and am using her book for this series called “Beyond Burnout: What to Do When Your Work Isn’t Working for You.”
This week we are diving into emotional exhaustion. Dr. O’Hana says, “Once a loving and compassionate person, you are now devoid of feeling. When you experience emotional exhaustion, you can become cynical and sarcastic. This style of relating and communication becomes a coping mechanism to protect your heart from holding more pain than it was intended to hold.”
Today, I want to discuss E.I., which stands for Emotional Intelligence. High E.I. means you can:
- Recognize your feelings and communicate them to others in the moment
- Manage your intense emotions
- Pay attention to the emotions of others
- Understand the emotional climate of a meeting, workplace, or environment and manage it appropriately
- De-escalate situations that are emotionally out of control
If you don’t feel you have a high EI, you are not alone. But the good news is that EI is not something you are born with; rather, it can be developed!
Here are a few tips Dr. O’Hana shares to help develop emotional intelligence:
- Learn the names of emotions and begin to name them in your own experience, such as “I feel disappointed.” I like to use an emotion wheel for this.
- When experiencing intense emotions, such as anger or fear, practice a time out. Find a place to be alone and take deep breaths until you can communicate your emotions respectfully and safely.
- Practice identifying and reflecting other people’s emotions.
- If a situation feels tense, try to identify how people are feeling and then respond to that feeling rather than to their behavior.
Now, let’s pause to process:
- How is your emotional intelligence? Rate it on a scale of 1-10,
- God, what are you saying to me today about turning on my emotions?
Resource mentioned:
Beyond Burnout: What to Do When Your Work Isn’t Working for You
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm chatting with Dr. Amy O'Hana about her book Beyond Burnout: What to Do When Your Work Isn’t Working for You. Dr. Amy O’Hana is a licensed professional counselor in Oregon and an Approved Clinical Supervisor. She is a full-time professor of clinical mental health counseling at the University of Western States in Portland, OR, has been a full-time counselor educator for 18 years, manages her own private practice, and has been the director of two counseling training clinics. Amy's research interests are human potential and motivation, erotic intelligence (which is more about spirituality than sexuality), and integrative approaches in psychotherapy (spirit-body-mind). She is the author of two published books, When Your Child is Grieving: God's Hope and Wisdom for the Journey Toward Healing and Beyond Burnout: What To Do When Your Work Isn’t Working For You. She writes every day – whether fiction and non-fiction, poetry, journaling, letters, or emails. When not writing, counseling or teaching, you can find Amy working on her fixer-upper, playing with her French bulldog Sunny, kayaking, or exploring the mountains of Central Oregon.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Burnout is essentially a disconnection. It's a sense of dysregulated wholeness meaning you're fragmented in some way and disconnected from your purpose. * 3 characteristics of burnout - a sense of emotional exhaustion, physical exhaustion, and loss of meaning * Loss of meaning can result in unethical behavior that seems out of character with the person engaged in it. They have become so disconnected from themselves that they no longer perceive things rationally. It's easy to judge, but we can all become so exhausted that we disconnect from ourselves. * Work is not a vocation. Stay-at-home moms experience burn out too. * Being overbooked and burnt out can occur at the same time. When you're overbooked, you'll feel better once you change the environment. Burnout requires a process of reconnection. * You can know you're burnt out if you notice changes on 3 levels - you're becoming more cynical, you notice weight gain or become more irritable, and you begin asking existential spiritual questions * 5 intentions of burnout resolution - practice stillness so God can restore your soul. Step into the stillness of presence and connection. Seek connection with God, yourself, and work. Cultivate awareness of who you are, where you are, and where you want to be. Focus on who you are to be, not what you are to do. * Move past doing to being by being intentional about fully connecting with the moment you're in instead of focusing on the end goal. * When you notice a friend experiencing burnout, find a way to serve them. They may not even realize they're experiencing it, but it's serious. Give them grace while they navigate their disconnection. * If you're experiencing burnout, the first step is acknowledging it. Slow down and understand it's a crisis, then attend to it.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Listen to the Talk Therapy Series about burnout
Be present in the moment. Insert the "to be" in your to-do list.
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We are in a series all about burnout. Last week we looked at the root cause of burnout. This week we are diving into one of the three areas where burnout shows up in our lives.
The first one we tend to notice is physical exhaustion. One of the first indicators of chronic stress and burnout is the development of physical health problems.
In her book, Dr. O’Hana lists a few key areas to consider when nourishing your physical body if you are burned out:
- Rest- practice good sleep hygiene.
- Nutrition - Simply put, eat to fuel your body.
- Movement - What kind of movement restores you?
- Touch - Touch is important in bonding and receiving love.
- Communion - Dr. Amy says “Receiving food and drink into your physical body is a tangible symbol of receiving Jesus into your being.”
Ask yourself these questions today:
- How is your heart?
- On a scale of 1-10, with 1 being “I’m great” to 10 being “I’m already burnt out”, where do you fall? Be honest. If anything above a 5, please get help. Tell a friend, family member, or counselor.
- Ask God what he's saying to you today about caring for your physical body.
Resource mentioned:
Beyond Burnout: What to Do When Your Work Isn’t Working for You
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This week we're starting a new series all about burnout. The Lord put this topic on my heart to process in these Talk Therapy sessions for a few reasons.
First, both my husband and I have experienced it at different seasons and it almost took us off track of our callings.
Second, because I counsel so many people who suffer from it.
Third, I am tired of the enemy taking territory in an area that could be avoided.
Let’s start by bringing some facts about burnout into the light:
- The term “burnout” originated in the 1970s by psychoanalyst Dr. Herbert Freudenberger. While supervising counselors who work with people dealing with addiction, he noticed symptoms of emotional and physical fatigue that were imparting their work.
- World Health Organization (WHO) included “burn-out” in the eleventh edition of the International Classification of Diseases (ICD-11) in 2019. This means burnout is serious!
- Symptoms of burnout mirror depression. But Dr. O’Hana says that burnout’s bottom line is disconnection from everything that is important to you, including your very heart and soul. “When we are disconnected, we begin to equate our identity with achievement and performance rather than accepting and loving ourselves as the people God created us to be.”
- “Self-care is not a luxury; it is an ethical priority.”
Now, let’s pause to process:
- How is your heart?
- On a scale of 1-10, with 1 being “I’m great” to 10 meaning “I’m already burnt out”, where do you fall? Be honest. If anything above a 5, please get help. Tell a friend, family member, or counselor.
- God, what are you saying to me today?
Resource mentioned:
Beyond Burnout: What to Do When Your Work Isn’t Working for You
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm talking to mother and daughter Dr. Helen McIntosh and Blythe Daniel, authors of Mended: Restoring the Hearts of Mothers and Daughters.
Blythe Daniel is an author, literary agent, and marketer with 25 years of experience in media and publishing. She has written for Focus on the Family, Proverbs 31 Ministries, and Christian Retailing. She conducts blog, podcast, and publicity campaigns and helps authors publish their books. She lives in Colorado with her husband and children.
Dr. Helen McIntosh (EdD, Counseling Psychology) is a counselor, speaker, educator, and author. Her work has appeared in several national outlets including Guideposts, ParentLife, and HomeLife magazines. She resides in Dalton, Georgia with her husband Jim. They have two children, including Blythe McIntosh Daniel, and are grandparents five times over.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Moms often do the hard work without getting a thank you. Speaking encouraging words over a mom does something inside her heart and inside our hearts. * If we want appreciation from our kids, we need to start by encouraging them. Being the initiator allows our kids to say kind things back to us. * When we’re in a hard relationship we tend to blame the other person, but Matthew 7 reminds us to focus on the issues in our own hearts. * If you have a broken relationship with your mother, remember that words bring life and death. Commit yourself to only speaking words of life. * Instead of telling our children what they should be doing, we can ask them if this is an area they'd like us to speak into. Honor and be humble before the other person. Even if we get it wrong, we can ask for forgiveness. * When we overhelp, it implies we think our child cannot do something well. * God designed us in a way that the relationship between child and mother is foundational. You can honor a mother who didn't necessarily earn it by separating the mess from the relationship and being a blessing builder. * Don't get so overwhelmed by your yeses that you can't be focused and intentional during the season while the kids are in your house. God will meet the desires of our hearts when we sacrifice for our kids. * You don't have to be perfect. You're not alone in feeling underappreciated or overwhelmed. You’re making a difference and you’re doing well. * If you feel discouraged, take it to the Lord. He’ll show you what the deeper issue is.
Resources Mentioned: Ep.31: Restoring the hearts of mothers & daughters {with Blythe Daniel & Helen McIntosh}
Let’s Get Real Practical: Grieve the lack of a relationship with your mom if you didn’t have it and consider seeing a therapist to help you process those wounds.
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When my family climbed the Guadalupe Peak earlier this year, I noticed many parallels to real life.
In order to stay consistent you must:
- Commit to do it. We met people along the way who didn’t prepare for the terrain (one woman was in heels), so they had to turn back.
- Have community. Have a few people around you that won’t let you quit. On both that physical mountain and my life mountains, that’s my husband. I would have quit many things a long time ago if it wasn’t for him.
- Celebrate. Enjoy the views at every turn. The peak was beautiful but each switchback had an equally as breathtaking view. Enjoy the journey.
My friends, the only way I have accomplished anything worthwhile in my life is by showing up consistently. It’s not always easy or fun. I’ve wanted to quit many times.
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I will never forget the moment in my journey to become a therapist when I was seeing my own therapist. I was processing a traumatic memory from my childhood and after I had shared everything I could remember she said, “Where is Jesus in this moment?”
For the first time, I was able to see Jesus there with me. Weeping with me. Protecting me in ways I didn’t even ask Him to. And walking me out of that dark situation. Jesus has since healed my heart from that time in my life, but it was a process.
We can’t talk about Jesus and therapy without bringing up the most obvious point about Him - He is a Healer. We can read countless stories in the Bible about when He healed in a moment. It rarely came at the time or way they might have imagined but one touch from Him and the people were never the same again.
The question I feel Jesus asking us today comes from John 5:6, "When Jesus saw him and knew he had been ill for a long time, he asked him, “Would you like to get well?”
I’m not talking about physical healing today, though I do believe Jesus still heals our bodies. Do you want to be well in your heart? Are you ready to process that pain? Jesus is inviting you into that healing today. When Jesus died on the cross and rose again, He sent us the Holy Spirit to be our helper and comforter. With the help of the Holy Spirit, your journey to wholeness in your mind, soul, body, and spirit can begin today.
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author Dominic Done about his latest book Your Longing Has a Name. Dominic Done is the founder of Pursuing Faith and author of When Faith Fails. With a master’s in theology from the University of Oxford, he has served as a pastor in Portland, Oregon; North Carolina; and Hawaii. Dominic has also taught English for companies in Europe, lectured in theology and history at various Christian colleges, worked as a radio DJ, and lived as a missionary in Vanuatu and Mexico. Key Points from Our Conversation: * In the Bible, flourishing is directly related to participation in life with God. Something is happening in our culture on a soul level that is broken. We are languishing. We are seeking truth and purpose and as Christians, we have the opportunity to speak into those souls. * "What lies beneath languishing is longing." * Society tends to think of the soul as what we become when our bodies die, but scripture says that the soul is the entirety of our being that longs for God. A flourishing soul is in an intimate relationship with Him. * Healing begins spiritually, mentally, and physically by taking a pause to breathe deeply. Something happens in the Lord's presence that renews our souls. He restores our breath. * It's difficult to receive soul rest because we are inundated with so many distractions. God wants us to embody a deep soul rest - a shalom. * "The deeper you breathe, the more you'll heal." * Our technology is giving us neuro overload. We cannot process information as quickly as it's being given to us. We have to build into our lives the spiritual practice of setting boundaries with our phones so that our souls can heal. * When we put on a mask as a means to defend ourselves, it creates a disconnect within us between our soul and our role. In time, our soul suffocates. We must practice living a life without walls. That means confronting the things that are hindering us in order to create synchronicity with the soul. * Our "shadow side" is the part of us that remains broken, but a shadow is proof of substance. To confront our shadows we can't just confess the sin, we need to determine why we struggle with the sin to begin with. * Self-control isn't just resisting harmful things, it's addressing the deeper longing that motivates the behavior. * Releasing your burdens to God needs to be a daily practice, but as you give Him your cares and burdens, He'll restore your soul.
Resources Mentioned: Your Longing Has a Name
When Faith Fails
The Care and Counsel Bible
Let’s Get Real Practical: In what area of your life do you need to return to the Lord so He can refill you?
Connect with Dominic: website | Instagram | Facebook
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So far we have discussed how Jesus felt and how He often retreated. This week we are looking at how He asked great questions.
I’ve been told much of my life that I ask great questions. As a counselor and podcast host, much of my days are spent asking questions. I’ve been asked before how I come up with such good questions. The answer is simple - I listen. Being a good listener is crucial if you want to be a great communicator.
Jesus was and is the best listener. We see all throughout the Bible examples of times when Jesus asked great questions, but those came from Him listening to what the person was really saying.
Jesus asked mostly open-ended questions. Open-ended implies we want to not only help you reach your own conclusion, but also want to have a conversation with you. Jesus wants to have a conversation with you. He wants to listen to your frustrations.
Questions for this week:
Do you trust Jesus? It’s hard to follow someone we don’t trust.
What question is He asking YOU? Write it down.
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This month our Talk Therapy series focus is on Jesus and therapy.
Why Jesus and therapy? Because nothing changes without Him. He shows me things only He can see. He takes us places only He knows to go.
Last week, we discussed how Jesus felt. Jesus would often retreat to a quiet place to be alone and pray. This week we are looking at how and why He retreated.
We live in a world that does not give us natural pauses to retreat so we must be intentional about this practice. I think Jesus was always retreating not just for the rest, but to hear His Father. He had many people giving their opinions on where He should go and what He should do next. He had to be intentional about aligning his mission, and values with the Father.
We must first retreat to be refueled before we can charge into what God has in store for us.
But how do we know what He wants us to do? We follow the values He has planted in our hearts.
Be sure to download the values worksheet and use it to retreat this week.
Resources mentioned:
Retreat in Order to Advance
Values Worksheet
Counseling with Rachael
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with Atheist-turned-Christian, Lee Strobel about his documentary The Case for Heaven. Lee is the former award-winning legal editor of The Chicago Tribune and a New York Times best-selling author of more than forty books and curricula that have sold fourteen million copies in total. He currently serves as Founding Director of the Lee Strobel Center for Evangelism and Applied Apologetics at Colorado Christian University. In 2017, Lee’s spiritual journey was depicted in an award-winning motion picture, The Case for Christ, which showed in theaters around the world. Lee and his wife, Leslie, have been married for forty-eight years. Their daughter, Alison, is a novelist and homeschooling expert (www.goodschooling.net), and their son, Kyle, is a professor of spiritual theology at the Talbot School of Theology at Biola University.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * If you're in a relationship with an unbeliever, be sure to build your relationship with God while maintaining the relationship with your spouse. It's also vital to have a good spiritual mentor to help guide you. * Lee wrote The Case for Heaven after a near-death experience and through his research found that the evidence shows our souls live on after death. * There are two aspects of the afterlife - the intermediate state when the soul leaves the body and lives on with the Lord or apart from Him and the second state when we are reunited with our resurrected bodies and spend eternity in physical heaven or hell. * The research about near-death experiences shows that the commonalities are consistent with Christian theology. * There are two common misconceptions about hell - it's not a place of fire and brimstone, that's just a metaphor to indicate it's the worst place to be. There also seems to be different degrees of hell, which would be consistent with the justice of God. * God doesn't send people to hell, He honors their free will choice to remain separated from Him. * There is not enough research to support loved ones being able to contact us after they pass. The Bible teaches there is a chasm between the living and the dead and it's an area we're warned not to get involved with. * You will never regret being courageous for Christ.
Resources Mentioned: The Case for Heaven movie
The Case for Heaven book
The Case for Heaven Young Readers Edition
The Case for Heaven and Hell curriculum
Why Believe in Heaven
The Case for Christ
The Case for Grace
Spiritual Mismatch
American Association of Christian Counselors
Counseling with Rachael
Let’s Get Real Practical: If you’re wrestling with your faith, you’re not alone. Dig into these questions this week - What do I believe about Jesus, God, and heaven? Then take time to do the research. Get in the Word and allow yourself space to wrestle. If you need someone to talk to, get into Christian counseling.
Connect with Lee: website | Instagram | Facebook
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This month our Talk Therapy series focus is on Jesus and therapy.
Why Jesus and therapy? Because nothing changes without Him. He shows me things only He can see. He takes us places only He knows to go.
When you partner with both Jesus and therapy, freedom comes in ways you never dreamed possible.
In this first episode of the series, I'm talking about how Jesus felt.
THREE TAKEAWAYS:
- It’s OK and healthy to feel. Jesus did!
- Jesus cares about your feelings (Mary)
- Jesus will weep with you.
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with Revelation Wellness Director of Culture, Heather Johnson. Heather is a beloved daughter of the King, wife to Charles, and momma to 3 amazing young people. She loves moving her body and walking with Jesus. She is always learning and changing and being transformed by the Word of God. Heather's greatest passion is to love God, His people, and empower people to step into their divine destinies.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * If you want to love people more, get closer to the Father. Loving people has to first come from being loved by Him. When we run out of love to give, we need God's love to replenish us. * "We're His be-loved, not His do-loved." We were created to do good works, but if we don't sit at His feet, we'll wear ourselves out. * Sit with God and allow Him to minister to you. It's intimate, personal, and vulnerable, but He is safe. It's more challenging than checking off boxes. * Joy is not situational, joy is the atmosphere of the kingdom. It comes through the Spirit, not circumstances. You learn to truth through seasons of sorrow and loss. * We don’t rewrite our theology based on our circumstances, we bring our circumstances to the Lord because He is good. * Finding joy in hard seasons requires pressing in and anchoring yourself to God's Word and His faithfulness. It's daily work of refusing to not trust God. * A relationship with Jesus is deeply personal. He's not found in the walls of a church, He's in the places you lay your heart before Him. Spend time being still and present with Him. It's a discipline. * Living well doesn't happen accidentally, it's born from intentional heart checks. Be corrected and challenged by God's Word. Bring the hidden things to the light and be healed. That is our testimony.
Resources Mentioned: Revelation Wellness Breath Prayer video
Let’s Get Real Practical: This week try practicing breath prayer for 2 minutes and do frequent check-ins on your heart. Be honest with God and yourself and allow Him to heal you.
Connect with Heather: Instagram
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Accountability is scary. It feels like we are giving up control because we are. Accountability takes humility because we have to confess our weaknesses. We have to admit we are prone to sin and fall into temptation.
The enemy knows if he can get us to wander alone, we are a much easier target to eliminate. We avoid wandering alone by being in community and then letting people really see us.
Why accountability matters: Because God loves us too much to let us get caught up in something we could have avoided. We have to do better in this area and it starts in our own home.
What could be different: You could walk in your calling but more importantly, you could live free. Things that are in the dark are the enemy’s playground. It’s time to kick him out.
Accountability isn’t just scary…it makes us sharper!
Growth Resource:
How People Grow by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend
Tested and Approved: 21 Lessons for Life and Ministry by Tom Lane
Lisa Whittle Jesus Over Everything and The Hard Good
Weekly grow challenge
- Ask God to show you an area He wants you to submit to accountability
- Let your friends or family in and be sure to let them know how big of a deal it is that you are letting them in so they don’t take it lightly.
- Unsubscribe or unfollow anything tempting you
- Set a date (if it’s physical accountability) register for a race, etc
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Physical growth is usually the first place our mind goes to when we think about self-improvement. There are enough physical challenges and exercise programs on the market to last you all year. But today, I want to challenge how we view and approach physical growth.
For most women, we view physical growth through the lens of shrinking. Dream with me for a moment about physical growth that doesn’t focus on shrinking, rather, it focuses on what our body is capable of doing when submitting it to God.
Why physical strength matters:
If you don’t feel well, it affects every area of your life.
What could be different:
More energy, excitement, confidence, activities of daily living, stronger mindset
Growth Resource:
How People Grow by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend
Revelation Wellness
BackBodyClinic.com
Weekly grow challenge:
Ask God how He wants to partner with you to grow physically. Maybe it’s doing something you’ve never done before. Or perhaps giving up something you know isn’t nourishing your body (excess sugar or alcohol). Do some research on a physical challenge that excites and challenges you.
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm chatting with my friend, Sandy Jobe. Sandy is a homemaker who loves to laugh and uses baking as a form of stress release. She is known for her quick wit, bubbly personality, and ability to brighten someone’s day with a homemade treat. She’s the author of a cookbook titled Hearts Gather Here: Making Memories Around the Table - it’s full of great recipes and inspiring family stories. Sandy is also the Women’s Ministries Care Pastor at Gateway Church in Southlake, TX. She and her husband Mark have 3 grown and married children and 5 grandsons.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Having a healthy marriage takes two people. That means you have you do your part and allow the Lord to work on your husband. * It's easier to blame others instead of owning our mistakes. Pray for your spouse. What we get frustrated by most with them is likely something we wrestle with ourselves. * Having a community you can be vulnerable with about your marriage and family struggles is key because it's easy to look at social media and believe the lie everyone's marriage is perfect except yours. Comparison is crippling. * If you want to change your marriage, be the change agent. Look for practical ways to serve one another. * The most common problems in marriage arise over unmet unexpressed expectations. Continue to invest in your marriage by utilizing tools like podcasts, marriage conferences, and books. * No matter what season you're in, be grateful. Pray about everything - and everything means every little thing. Nothing is too small to bring to God. * There is great value in taking time for the table. It creates an opportunity to look your loved ones in the eyes and connect with them. * If your home is hectic and chaotic, you need to look at your own soul. * We need to be responders, not reactors. If you want something to change, consider changing your verbiage. Ask God what's in your heart that caused you to respond poorly. Step back and ask what your family needs.
Let’s Get Real Practical: What are the little things you haven't considered praying about? Commit to praying over those things this week. Don't discount anything.
Connect with Sandy: website | Instagram | Facebook
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Welcome to the second episode in the Growth Series! We serve a God of growth. When God says grow, nothing we do will stop it from happening. Don’t be mistaken, even when we don’t SEE the growth, it is happening. If you feel stuck or would love to see growth in different areas of your life, this series is for you. Each week we are focusing on an area of growth. You will notice EVERY week includes spiritual growth because, without it, nothing in our lives will grow.
This week’s topic is Emotional Growth.
Why emotional growth matters:
Last week we discussed how our thoughts affect feelings and feelings (or emotions) affect behaviors. Most people want to skip the feelings part. Emotions are neither good nor bad, rather, they are telling us what is happening in our hearts. Everyone has emotions but we all view and process them differently. According to Gottman Emotion Coaching, there are 7 basic emotions we all share: sadness, anger, disgust, contempt, fear, surprise, and happiness.
What could be different if you grew strong emotionally:
You would have more self-control. You would be able to communicate more clearly. You would feel less like a ticking time bomb or volcano ready to erupt. You would form a healthy relationship with your emotions so instead of controlling you, they would help you.
God Growth: Ephesians 4:26, "Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger."
TWO things we see here: It’s okay to feel angry, just don’t act out in it. Next, RESOLVE it. If you can’t process right away because you are too upset, that’s okay. But don’t wake up the next day and pretend nothing happened. It’s still there. Be brave enough to deal with it.
Growth Resources:
How People Grow by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend
Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman
The emotion wheel
Weekly grow challenge:
Let’s pause for a moment to see your response to two of these basic emotions:
- When was the last time you remember feeling sad? Did you allow yourself to feel it? Did you tell anyone you felt it (in other words, did you express it)?
- When was the last time you felt happy? Did you express it? Sometimes when we train ourselves to not feel sad or uncomfortable emotions, we also shut down feeling happy emotions.
Pay attention to your emotions and what you do with them when they come up. Do you feel and express?
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Welcome to The first episode in the Growth Series. We serve a God of growth. Just look all around you. From the beautiful trees and flowers to human beings. When God says grow, nothing we do will stop it from happening. Don’t be mistaken, even when we don’t SEE the growth, it is happening. If you feel stuck or would love to see growth in different areas of your life, this series is for you. Each week we will focus on an area of growth. You will notice EVERY week includes spiritual growth because, without it, nothing in our lives will grow.
This week’s topic is mindset growth.
Why it matters: Thoughts, feelings, behaviors. Change your mind, change your life.
What could be different if your mindset grew: You could break barriers.
God Growth: 2 Corinthians 10:5, "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."
Growth Resource: How People Grow by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend and Battlefield of the Mind by Joyce Meyer
Weekly grow challenge: Pay attention to your thoughts. Notice themes. Practice taking them captive.
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm speaking with author Sarah Philpott about her new book The Growing Season: A Year of Down-on-the-Farm Devotions. Sarah is the ECPA Award-nominated author of Loved Baby: 31 Devotions Helping You Grieve and Cherish Your Child After Pregnancy Loss. On her website, she writes about her family, life on a cattle farm in the South, and learning to cherish God’s provisions in joy and sorrow. Also, she doesn't share desserts.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * "Fallow ground" is soil that has been left unplanted to rest and regenerate. Without rest, the soil loses its nutrients and cannot grow crops. We also need rest in our spiritual lives to fill our souls so that we can pour into others. * Resting well requires pruning things out of our lives in different seasons. Take inventory of what you've committed to and eliminate the things that don't fit your priorities right now. * "To grow a little, you've got to cut a little." * Remember that everything is a season. In busy seasons, you may have to prune "good" things. Choose what you can do well and give yourself grace. No one is doing it all. * You'll know you're growing spiritually when the attributes of the fruit of the Spirit come more naturally to you. * Savor the "summer" seasons in your life when everything is blooming. We feel God's presence when we witness how He designed everything in nature to work in harmony. * Fall is a harvest season that allows you to rejoice in the fruits of your labor.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Have you ever found yourself frustrated in an area of your life over and over? I have good news for you - the time for growth is here. Some of you might need to plant new seeds, others will see seeds they've been watering finally sprout. Ask God these two questions this week: What area do You want to grow in my life this month? What responsibility do I have for that growth? Then be sure to write down what He says to you.
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This week our topic is your choice.
As I prayed about what the final relationship focus should be, of course, things that were relevant to me came to mind, like kids and extended family members. However, I know many of you listening may not be able to relate to those, so I felt the holy spirit say, “Ask them what relationship I want to restore.” And I sense that He is going to ask you to bring up a hard relationship. You know, the one you want to avoid.
Take a moment to pause and ask God, “What relationship are you bringing up today?”
Think about that person, or group of people, as you read this month’s key verse from 1 Corinthians 13:4:
"Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends."
The part of this verse that stuck out to me as being relevant to relationships for today’s episode is that love is not resentful.
Resentment is a sneaky weed that lodges itself into the soil of our hearts without us even knowing it. Sometimes we feel resentment towards someone and we don’t have a solid reason as to why. It likely started with a small weed, something you thought you could just overlook, but that weed has gotten watered every time that person did or said something that struck the same resentment cord. Before we know it, that relationship is being choked by resentment and will eventually die.
To check for resentment in your relationships, ask these questions:
- What comes up immediately when I think of this person? If your heart rate speeds up and you get a knot in your stomach (or physical response to a psychological problem) then you might have a root of resentment.
- Can you talk about it? If you can’t talk about it, it owns you.
The fix for resentment:
- Talk about it. To God, to trusted friends (not gossip), to a therapist, and finally to the person.
- Bless and release (day by day)
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The February series we are doing is all about restoring relationships. Last week we chatted about restoring your marriage. If you missed it, please go back and tune in. This week our topic is friendships. Healthy friendships are a treasure. If you find one, you need to hang on to it. But what about when friendships end? It leaves us hurt, raw, vulnerable, and if we aren’t careful, bitter. “If you can’t talk about it, it owns you.” Let’s talk about friendship today so past wounds don’t own us.
This month’s key verse for these episodes is from 1 Corinthians 13:4-8. Think about friendship as you read it:
"Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends."
Another verse I love when it comes to healthy friendships is Proverbs 27:17, "As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another."
Two questions to ask about friendship - Do I leave my time with this friend feeling closer to them? Does this friend draw me closer to God?
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with Megan Lacefield. Serving as a Marriage & Family Pastor for years, Megan has seen God work miracles in many marriages, starting with her own. Though she and the love of her life, Chad, started off shaky they landed on solid ground and have been running full steam ever since. With a daughter, Chandler(21), and son Riley (18), their family has shared with thousands their story of redemption, grace, and celebrating God's goodness in the little things. Recently she stepped out in faith into a new season to pursue the dream God put inside her to speak and write. Megan’s heart is that the spoken words or written words found in Everyday Pearls capture the snapshot of His love through even the smallest details of our lives. Strong and bold is Megan’s message of hope for those who feel lost in the shuffle and insignificant in the eyes of God.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Megan's revelation that she was raising her grandkid's parents shifted and shaped how she and her husband were doing marriage. * We don't have the option to quit in the middle of our marriage. Remember that you were intentionally designed with different strengths. We must work in rhythm and know our individual roles. * Quit quitting on God, yourself, and each other. Marriage is not 50/50, you both have to give 100% of yourself. * "If you don't remember where you came from, you won't have the strength and courage to move where God wants you to be." * Defining the goals you're moving toward will take time to develop. Ask each other and your kids what is most important to them. Ask God where He wants to lead you. Destinations are unique. * 3 questions to craft a family mission statement - What words do you want to describe your family? What do you want your family legacy to be? What’s most important to you? * When God is calling you to something different, give yourself grace in the discomfort. We lean into God in the discomfort. You don’t have to be okay. * Be the community you need. Show up for people. Those investments do not return void. * If you're questioning if someone should be part of your community, ask how you feel after you spend time with them. Do they make you feel closer to God? It's okay if you're not moving in the same direction. * Sometimes relationships require additional effort. If you feel a burden for someone, ask them what they need and keep asking until they accept the help.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Take a walk with your spouse and try asking these 3 questions - How do you think I’m doing? How do you think we’re doing? What do you need from me?
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The February series we are doing is all about restoring relationships. We started last week by restoring union with ourselves and the Lord. If you missed it, please go back and tune in.
Since today is Valentine’s day, it seemed fitting to dive right into restoring romantic relationships, with the focus on marriage.
Marriage was God’s idea and the enemy has been wreaking havoc on it since the beginning of time.
Come with me as the Lord steps on our toes about what true love in our marriage or any relationship in our lives should look like. I’m going to move through them slowly. Ask God to highlight any of these areas you need to submit to Him.
Key Verse for the month: "Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away." 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
Valentine's Idea:
Consider writing your spouse a note and let them know what God convicted you of in this verse. Write all the things you love about your spouse and what they do well. Tell them how much you love them no matter what.
Fun resource: XO Fitness
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It’s the first week in February and chances are many of you have already given up on a new year's resolutions and I’m curious what you're thinking about yourself right now.
We can’t practice self-love without seeking God with our whole entire heart, soul, mind, and strength. How can we love others if we don’t first love ourselves? The answer lies in more time seeking God.
Key Verse for the month: "Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away." 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
Let's look at our key verse analyzed against our relationship with ourselves. Do you treat yourself kind? With patience? Are you irritable? Resentful?
Action steps for this week:
Ask God what is separating you from Him and be willing to get rid of it
Turn on worship music
Look for the Lord throughout your day in fun way
Read the Bible
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm chatting with author Gary Thomas about his book Married Sex: A Christian Couple's Guide to Reimagining Your Love Life. Gary is a writer in residence at Second Baptist Church in Houston, Texas, and an adjunct faculty member teaching on spiritual formation at Western Seminary in Portland, Oregon, and Houston Theological Seminary in Houston, Texas. He is the author of 20 books, including When to Walk Away, Sacred Pathways, Cherish, and Sacred Marriage (over one million copies sold). He has a master's degree from Regent College and was awarded an honorary doctorate in divinity from Western Seminary. Gary has spoken in 49 states and 10 different countries. Key Points from Our Conversation: * Healthy sex should include 3 main components - it should be mutually pleasurable, affirm the relationship, and honor God. * “It’s very different when you use sex to cherish your spouse rather than using your spouse to cherish sex.” * The first toward redirecting unhealthy sex is to find out what's not working. It may be theological, relational, physical, or creative. * The Bible celebrates the sexual relationship between husband and wife in Song of Songs. It's a gift from God that provides pleasure, creates life, and bonds us relationally. * For sex to thrive it has to be mutually pleasurable. There is nothing sinful or selfish about wanting to experience pleasure - God designed your body for it. * Common "sexpecations" - Because you love each other sex will be amazing. You'll always desire your spouse sexually. Sex will always be easy. Sex is primarily for men. * All five senses create their own sense of sexual pleasure. By being intentional about these areas, you can create a different kind of sexual experience.
Let’s Get Real Practical: There are only two practical steps for you to follow this week - buy Married Sex then read and discuss it with your spouse.
Resources Mentioned: Debra Fileta
Episode Sponsor: How to Communicate Effectively with Your Spouse or Loved Ones – a one-page document with 6 easy steps to communicate your thoughts and feelings you can use in any tough conversation.
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author Mattie Jackson Selecman about her new book Lemons on Friday: Trusting God Through My Greatest Heartbreak. Mattie is a certified sommelier and previously owned a wine bar in Nashville. She also has a degree in creative writing from the University of Tennessee. Tragically, she lost her husband of less than a year, Ben Selecman, in September 2018 after he suffered a traumatic brain injury while on vacation in Florida. Despite her grief, Mattie is pushing forward and has dedicated herself to helping others. Mattie and her business partner, Brooke Tometich, started a philanthropic merchandise brand dubbed “NaSHEville” in order to help women and children in need—specifically orphans, widows, and trafficked women.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * The most helpful question for Mattie wasn’t “what do you need?” It was “would this be helpful?” If a loved one is grieving, ask if they’d like to talk about it or if they’d like to hear about your life as an escape from their pain. * So many people wrestle with why terrible things happen, but whether it was an accident or "God's plan," either is hard to reconcile. Fight it out with God. If he doesn’t give you an answer, pray to trust Him anyway. Don’t pretend you’re okay if you’re not. In the grappling with God, you’ll see His tenderness. * Understanding why something happened isn't what will heal you; healing comes from trusting that God is good and sovereign. * Don’t wait until you hit rock bottom to build a foundation of faith. Create a daily rhythm. Learn about Jesus, read the gospels. * Time is not the one thing that’s gonna heal you - Jesus is the one thing that can heal you. Time helped Mattie learn what her hurt looked like and gave her tools to help manage her grief to become less debilitating. With time, you start to learn how to relate to it. * Find one thing that would nourish your soul each day – prayer, a walk, etc. - and honor those things. Your heart comes back together slowly and it takes different things on different days. Invite the people you trust in.
Resources Mentioned: Stages of grief
Grief process worksheet
A Grief Observed by C.S. Lewis
Let’s Get Real Practical: Download the Stages of Grief sheet and Grief Process Worksheet
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with New York Times bestselling author Francine Rivers about her book and new movie Redeeming Love. Francine has published numerous novels—all bestsellers—and she has continued to win both industry acclaim and reader loyalty around the globe. Her novels have been awarded or nominated for many honors, and in 1997, after winning her third RITA Award for inspirational fiction, Francine was inducted into the Romance Writers of America Hall of Fame. In 2015, she received the Lifetime Achievement Award from American Christian Fiction Writers (ACFW). Francine’s novels have been translated into over 30 different languages, and she enjoys bestseller status in many foreign countries. She and her husband enjoy spending time with their children and grandchildren.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Redeeming Love is based on the book of Hosea in which the Lord tells Hosea to marry a prostitute. Although she resists, he continues to pursue her. It's a picture of God's love for His people. * The world thinks of love as a feeling, but feelings are fleeting. Love is action. God's love is constant and it never fails, but it's up to us to choose to accept it. * The main takeaway of Redeeming Love is God's unrelenting love for us. * Take your non-Christian friends to see this movie and use it as a conversation starter about Christ. And if you can, read the book before you see it.
Resources Mentioned: Redeeming Love book
Redeeming Love movie
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with speaking coach Amie Stockstill. Amie is a fun-loving Southern who is passionate about training women to communicate the Gospel with confidence and clarity through her organization Let’s Echo.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * There is not a calling that God gives us that doesn't involve using our voice. * Despite our feeling, we know we're surrendered to what God is calling us to when we say yes even when we don't want to. * Fear stops us from using our voice - fear that it won't work, that we'll be wrong, even fear that we're appointing ourselves. * If you’re worried about stepping outside of submission, that is proof of your submission and surrender. * If you’re wrestling with whether or not God has appointed you to something, first you have to wrestle with it with God. Take your time. If the vision multiplies, take it to the right people and have them partner with you. * You can’t do the exterior things without doing the internal work that lays the foundation and that can be a long process. * The most powerful part of using your voice is saying yes to God. Even if I don’t have any of the things I think I should have, I still surrender and say "here I am." If God says I can do it, then who am I to say no? * Wherever you are, you can use your voice. All we have to do is echo the heart of the Father. If we simply repeat what He tells us in His Word, that’s a no-fail system. * The daily pursuit of holiness builds character. In order to have a character that sustains our calling, we must stand before the Lord daily and ask Him to refine us, purify us, and point out what’s wrong in our hearts. * We’re never going to be perfect; God can use us anyway. We're not deserving, but we can choose to be obedient and humble. Be open to correction and rebuke and respond in a way that lines up with the Word.
Resources Mentioned: Let's Echo free resources
M'Cheyne One Year Reading Plan - digital | PDF
Let’s Get Real Practical: Let's debunk some myths we might believe about having something to say with these two questions -
When you think of someone being used by God, what personality traits do they possess?
Are those traits biblical or did you believe it incorrectly based on what you had observed in our world?
Now consider your unique personality. How is it unique? And how might God use your unique voice and personality to reach people where He has planted you?
Episode sponsor: Download the 3 Action Steps to Overcome Fear & Pursue your God-Given Dreams FREE training today!
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For the month of December, we have spent every Monday morning in a series called “Praise, Process & Pray through 2021”. Last week, we processed body image. This week our topic is desires and dreams in our hearts.
"Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4
"Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain." Psalm 127:1
Praise: For the dreams that have come to pass this year. And for the dreams that will come to pass.
Process: Dreams that fizzled. Let’s ask the Lord some questions about those dreams:
- Was that dream from you?
- Do you want to bring that dream back to life?
- Is it time to let that dream go?
- What dream do you want to deposit in my heart for 2022?
Pray: Lord, we only want to seek the dreams that you have deposited in our hearts. Uproot any dreams or desires that are not from you. I am willing to work hard, but I do not want to labor in vain. Build these dreams in ways only can, father. I want to partner with you.
Resource: 3 Action Steps to Overcome Fear & Pursue your God-Given Dreams
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For the month of December, we are spending every Monday morning in a series called “Praise, Process & Pray through 2021”. Last week, we processed relationships. This week our topic is body image.
I am finishing up the first draft of my manuscript on body image and one thing I know for certain is that the Lord cares about every area of our lives, including our bodies.
Praise: Thank God for your body. Speak life over her.
Process:
- How is my relationship with my body?
- Are there any feelings of shame or pride around my body that I need to release?
- What season is my body in? (Give yourself permission to age and change.)
- Write a letter to your body
Pray: Over body image and health in 2021.
Resource: Biblical Body Image Coloring Book
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For the month of December, we will spend every Monday morning in a series called “Praise, Process & Pray through 2021”. Last week, we processed the topic of change, closed doors/redirection, or loss. This week our topic is relationships.
Relationships are hard yet we need them. Let’s start by praising God for the relationships we do have.
Praise: Thank God for anyone currently in your life. Thank God for what he did in relationships. This year, I grew closer to my oldest daughter and my husband.
Process: Broken relationships have the potential to hold great power over us. Dr. Robert Anthony says, “When you blame others, you give up your power to change”. I lost a friendship this year and it left me feeling confused, betrayed, and lonely. Every time that friend comes to mind, I choose to release and bless her. Let’s do that now in our prayer time.
Pray: Pray over broken relationships. Pray over 2022, that the Lord will restore broken relationships and bring new ones in as needed.
Resource: Six Steps to Clear Communication
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For the month of December, we will spend every Monday morning in a series called “Praise, Process & Pray through 2021”. Y’all loved this series so much last year that we brought it back again. Each week the focus will be different, but the theme of praising, processing, and praying will remain the same. I asked the Lord to show me areas he wants us to process before we move into 2022 and the first thing He brought up was change. This can look like closed doors/redirection, or loss.
If you tuned in last year, you might have noticed we just processed and prayed. This year, I felt God ask me to add praise. God is always worthy of our praise so let’s start each episode by praising him, no matter the circumstances.
Let’s start today by processing change in 2021.
Praise: Psalm 150:5 says “Let everything that has breathe praise the Lord. Praise the Lord!”. If you are listening to this message, it means you have breath in your body. Let’s take a moment to use our own breathe to praise the Lord for whatever comes to mind.
Process these questions throughout the week in a journal:
- What change or closed doors did I experience in 2021?
- What was lost in 2021?
- Have I addressed that loss or numbed the pain with passive activities like eating, shopping, social media, or other avoidant activities?
- God, what do you want to redeem that was stolen in 2021?
Man’s rejection can often be God’s direction. Take a moment to ask God where He is taking you.
Pray: Release control
Resource mentioned:
3 Action Steps to Overcome Fear & Pursue Your God-Given Dreams
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author Victoria Duerstock. Victoria is a multi-passionate creative and entrepreneur fueled mostly by coffee who pursues her dreams with verve and intensity. Wife and mom of three, Victoria divides and conquers the never-ending to-do list while working to maintain her sanity and pleasant demeanor. Her writing journey plunged her deep into the social media landscape and she enjoys sharing her tips and tricks for growth and engagement with others. Recipient of the 2020 Selah Nonfiction Book of the Year, Victoria has authored six titles, with more on the way. She is the founder and president of End Game Press, a traditional publishing house where ordinary people accomplish extraordinary things.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * You cannot achieve peace in your marriage without intentionally pursuing it. * The busyness is the most common peace stealer in our homes. Decluttering our schedules and homes will help free up peace. * "When it comes to decluttering your schedule, the enemy is not trying to decide between the good things and the wrong things, it’s trying to decide between the best and the good.” * Decluttering allows you to better engage with the people in your home. They can relax and be comfortable in your space. “If the eye can rest, the body can rest.” * If you struggle to keep your home decluttered, start small. Start by spending a few minutes every day taking things to the places they belong in your home. Remember that the goal is sustainable progress, but the end result. * If you want to redecorate a room but don't know where to start, shop your home by moving decorations around that you already have to refresh your space. Be willing to try things. And if you know someone who is gifted at decorating, don't be afraid to ask for their help to make your space personal and beautiful. * Don't stress if interior design doesn't come naturally to you, remember that making things comfortable is what matters. Be focused on relationships and trust God to put things into place. * Prayer allows us to enter into the peace of God. “When I’m praying it’s a reminder of my need because of my lack."
Resources Mentioned: Heart & Home book series
Let’s Get Real Practical: I want to help you cultivate an atmosphere of peace and joy in your home. Ask yourself what is keeping you from playing or being creative, especially in your home. Then be intentional to play or engage in a hobby.
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with Dr. Juli Slattery. Juli is a clinical psychologist, author, speaker, and broadcast media professional with over twenty-five years of experience counseling, and teaching women. She’s the president and co-founder of Authentic Intimacy, a unique ministry devoted to teaching God’s design for intimacy and sexuality. In 2020, Juli launched SexualDiscipleship.com, a platform designed to help Christian leaders navigate sexual issues and questions with gospel-centered truth. She hosts a weekly podcast, Java with Juli, where she answers tough questions about relationships, marriage, and spiritual, emotional, and sexual intimacy.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Women don’t understand how to use their power. Understanding healthy marriage means understanding how to use our power constructively and how we often use it destructively. * A wife's biggest challenge is wanting to husband to lead, but wanting him to lead the way she wants him to lead. When we direct his actions, we're not helping develop leadership in him. "Men grow when they’re encouraged, given a vision of who they’ll become, and when they don’t fear failure." * You can help empower your husband by establishing you've got his back through failure. Use teamwork language - "we" instead of "I". Most of the time almost every decision is less important than how you make the decision. Be more concerned about your marriage than getting everything right. * A wife's power comes from what the other person needs. God designed it that way. Men have 3 basic needs - to feel like their wife believes in them despite their weaknesses, their wife’s help (insight, accountability, etc.), and sexual intimacy. * We often misuse our power out of fear or anger. Instead of encouraging our husbands to be who they are, we want to determine how things are done. It’s controlling and manipulative and makes him make decisions based on fear of our response. * God designed sex to be powerful and intimate. It exposes us. It taps into shame and self-worth. It’s a spiritual battleground. That’s why it’s worth fighting for. Get God’s perspective of sex. Pray together about your sex life and consider going to counseling. * “Anything close to the heart of God is constantly under attack from the enemy.” * Common sexual barriers include differences in desire, physical issues, or infertility. Get help for physical issues. Look for someone who has expertise in sexual functioning like a pelvic floor specialist or Christian sex therapist. * Healthy conflict within marriage is good. It's how individuals navigate their differences. Fighting is "you against me" and "you have to see it my way." It happens when we are triggered and we go in self-protection mode instead of determining how to get on the same page.
Let’s Get Real Practical: It’s no secret that the enemy hates marriage. This week I'm challenging you to fight for your marriage. Ask God these 2 questions - What area of my marriage is the enemy attacking? How can I partner with you to fight for my marriage?
Episode Sponsor: How to Communicate Effectively with Your Spouse or Loved Ones – a one-page document with 6 easy steps to communicate your thoughts and feelings you can use in any tough conversation.
Connect with Juli: website | Instagram | Facebook | podcast
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with Juli Bevere. She is a co-founder of SonsAndDaughters.tv and she desires to see the sons and daughters of God rise to their potential so that their impact reverberates long after their final breath. Julianna is deeply in love with her husband, Addison, and together they have four adorable offspring—Asher (12), Sophia (10), Elizabeth (7), and Augustus (5). Julianna and her family live in Colorado Springs, but she’ll always be a Texan at heart.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * In her new book, I AM: Find Your Identity. Claim Your Freedom. Embrace the Adventure, Juli demystifies what the Bible says about us as children of God by defining terms that have been clouded ("holy", "righteous," "called") and explaining how we can contextualize them for our lives. * Too often we let comparison be the dictator of what’s enough in our lives. When you’re being cultivated and allowing God to grow you, to figure out who it is you’re needed to be – that’s your calling, not what you’re doing. What you put your hands to will continually change. * “Calling happens in the seemingly mundane. Your calling is not only what you do, but more deeply, it’s who you are.” * Believing in your value as a daughter of God is not a one-time revelation. It comes from positionally knowing who you are and whose you are with nothing to prove or hide. Being a daughter of God allows you to enter the world in a position where you can give because you are loved and not looking to receive. Growth requires consistently making space, removing distractions, and sitting with God. * "We do a disservice to the world when we walk into situations looking to receive from the world rather than give to it. That’s what it means to be a son and daughter of God.” * Your calling is not one task, vocation, or achievement. It’s multifaceted beautiful and complex. It’s God’s intention for you to change grow and develop. * Look at your life holistically. So much of your calling is being a light in the different roles in your life. We are all part of the body of Christ, not the totality. No one is doing it all on their own.
Resources Mentioned: I AM: Find Your Identity. Claim Your Freedom. Embrace the Adventure
SonsAndDaughters.tv
Messenger X app
Let’s Get Real Practical: We’re all listening to someone or something and we need to be more aware and intentional about who we let speak into our lives. This week think about one "I am" statement that you need to replace, then be intentional about replacing that lie with the truth of God's Word.
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with revivalist, author, and Director of Saturate Global, Jessi Green. After being radically saved in her Manhattan apartment after a radical encounter with God, she has been on a journey to go “all in” and discover the “real” Jesus and ignite the Church for revival. She is passionate about preaching the Gospel, shaking religious systems, and equipping the saints to make disciples. She believes that everyone is qualified to share the Good News and teach others to follow Jesus. While enjoying the sun in North Carolina with her two sons David Leonidas and Ethan Everest and baby daughter Summer Kingsley, she passionately speaks about what it means to follow a Jesus who is alive and wants to transform cities and your life.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Revival typically happens when the church is in crisis. Jessi was told, “The harvest begins summer of 2020, prepare the nets.” Revival is happening in every city if we choose to partner with the Holy Spirit. * We don't always need revival, but there are certain indications in society that create an environment for revival such as jealousy and evil rumors within the church or when the church has lost its love for one another. * We often confuse mass salvation with revival, but salvation is simply the fruit of becoming ignited in love for Jesus. * Revival fire is deposited in the hearts of young people who are a part of it. God creates a synergy among children in revival to help usher in the next revival. * God is not withholding Himself from us. If you want to experience revival, the question is how deep do you want to go? As you go deeper, you lose control. Ask yourself what it is that’s preventing you from going all-in with Jesus. * After His crucifixion, Jesus tells us that it was better for Him to leave in the flesh so that the Holy Spirit could come to dwell with us. That requires a response from us because saying no to the Holy Spirit is rejecting what Christ is offering you. Ask the Lord to teach you through scripture about the nature of Jesus and the purpose of the Holy Spirit. * You can help support revivalists by attending a Saturate Global event, joining a volunteer team, donating money to revival ministries, and praying for discernment, wisdom, and protection over the families o the people doing this work. You can find more practical tips in Jessi's book Wildfires: Revolt Against Apathy and Ignite Your World with God's Power.
Let’s Get Real Practical: I don't have any action steps for you to take this week, but I do ask that you'd take a moment and pray with me to usher in the spirit of revival right where we are.
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Connect with Jessi: website | Instagram | Facebook
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with Becky Keife. Becky is the community manager for (in)courage, an online community where women gather to build community, celebrate diversity, and become women of courage. In addition to daily articles on incourage.me, (in)courage also offers Bible studies, devotionals, and a podcast to help women grow in their faith! Becky is also a popular speaker and is the author of The Simple Difference: How Every Small Kindness Makes a Big Impact, the Courageous Kindness Bible Study, as well as No Better Mom for the Job. She and her husband live near Los Angeles, where they enjoy hiking shady trails with their three spirited sons.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * We often think of kindness as being synonymous with being polite or nice, but often it requires courage. We need to be willing to embrace the awkward for the sake of encouraging someone else. * “Our words don’t have to be complicated in order to be meaningful.” * Jesus often chose kindness through awkward actions. Take a risk and leave the outcome to God. If we let what-ifs become barriers to following the Holy Spirit, we'll miss out on the blessing He has for us. He's offering us the opportunity to see Him work in us and through us in unexpected ways. * Often God isn’t asking us to make a big move but to do the simple thing. The small things can cause ripples of change. Don’t wait for the perfect circumstances. We can make a difference right where we are with exactly what we have. God wants to use our simple kindness. * When we build margin into our lives it gives us the opportunity to show kindness without feeling like we don't have the time to invest in others. Regardless of how much time we have, we can choose to be present where we are and to the people in front of us. “Be where your feet are.” * There's something powerful that happens when we shift from being self-focused to others-focused. When you feel like you have nothing left to give, choose to be the friend/spouse/neighbor you want to have. The more you pour out, the more God will fill you back up. * Don’t discount the power of prayer. Prayer isn’t a last resort, it should be our first response. Consider offering the profound kindness of praying for someone while you're with them in the moment.
Let’s Get Real Practical: I'm challenging you to ask God to show you who He wants you to show kindness to today. Then follow through by doing something for that person that makes you a bit uncomfortable.
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with my friend Nika Maples about her incredible story. She says, "When I was 20 years old, my plans for my life, career, family, and future fell apart. I was an active sophomore in college, then suddenly I was quadriplegic in the Intensive Care Unit, having suffered a massive brainstem stroke. I could not speak, swallow, or blink. Because I could hear, I listened as doctors warned my family that I had as little as 48 hours to live. There was nothing for us to do but pray. My faith sustained me in ways I can hardly explain, and a year later I walked back onto my college campus on my own two feet. I taught English in public schools for ten years, and in 2007, the Texas Education Agency awarded me the distinguished honor of Texas Secondary Teacher of the Year. In that role, I started writing and speaking full time, sharing messages of hope and endurance with education, business, and church groups across the country. I love seeing people experience a renewed sense of purpose because of one of my presentations. One of the most rewarding things I do is help Christian writers conquer what's holding them back. To date, I have written five books and I have a thriving career as a writer and public speaker. But that wasn't always the case. I remember struggling to finish my first book and wondering how to take the next step in publishing and marketing. Now I enjoy teaching writers how to advance their Kingdom-focused writing projects through my signature program, The Keep Writing Course."
Key Points from Our Conversation: * After suffering a brain stem stroke and being given a bad report, Nika says that the prognosis was “information, but not a proclamation” about her life. God not only restored Nika’s speech but also gave her a platform to use it. “There’s no such thing as a dead-end in God’s kingdom.” * We often believe information as a fact, but we should bring everything to the Lord. Give the facts to Him as you know them and trust that He knows and holds the future. * Some common limiting beliefs that often stop us from starting are that don’t have enough time, money or skill, and ability. Stop focusing on the temporary. “There is no such thing as being behind with an eternal God.” * Money is just a tool. You should never think of money as an obstacle. God is the only source. Everything else is a resource. Ask God for what you need to accomplish the task He’s assigned you. * When we say, “I don’t know,” it disconnects us from the divine wisdom God is giving us. The Holy Spirit speaks truth and increases our wisdom. He has given us everything we need for life and Godliness. His thoughts that are higher than my thoughts are available to me. Say something different like, “God is helping me figure this out” or “It’s becoming clearer.” * “Doubt means I’m entering new territory. Discomfort is the price of admission to taking new territory.” The discomfort casts us into His comforting arms. He’s the only one who can truly comfort us. God doesn’t require us to suffer, but a lot of times suffering produces what’s next because we meet Jesus in a new way. * When doubt comes up, we think we’re not supposed to do something. The doubt comes before the breakthrough. Every dream we have is on the other side of discomfort. Failure is not a problem. God will use our failure for fruitfulness. * Without faith, it’s impossible to please God. Faith is God’s pleasure. He doesn’t want our works. It’s when we’re face down in loss, failure, and defeat that we can experience the greatest faith in our lives. When we know He’s the only one who can save us and He’s the only one that will, that faith brings Him great pleasure. Be content to let him lead. * Self-confidence comes from our self-history. God-confidence is knowing that if He asked me to do it, then He’s planning to empower me to do it. There are enough blessings for all. There is no lack in the kingdom.
Let’s Get Real Practical: The Bible says we should take our thoughts captive. This week I encourage you to take a deep look at your thoughts and investigate how they're affecting your life.
What’s a thought that God is calling you to take captive? (Choose just one at a time.) What feeling does that thought activate? What behavior is following?
Resources Mentioned: Twelve Clean Pages
Keep Writing Course
One-on-one coaching
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Connect with Nika: website | Instagram | Facebook
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with Michelle Meyers and Somer Phoebus about their new book She Works His Way: A Practical Guide for Doing What Matters Most in a Get-Things-Done World. Michelle and Somer are also moms, wives, women called to work, best friends, and co-leaders of She Works His Way - a discipleship community for working women.
Michelle Myers is an author, entrepreneur, and motivator. Michelle launched She Works His Way to pour God's truth into the lives of women in ministry and business. She is the author of Famous in Heaven & at Home. Michelle lives in North Carolina with her husband, two sons, and a daughter. Somer Phoebus is a brick-and-mortar business lover, productivity expert, and pastor's wife. She is part of the She Works His Way leadership team. In addition to an early career in fashion and retail, Somer started and sold two fitness studios. Somer lives in Maryland with her husband and two daughters.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Through She Works His Way Michelle and Somer encourage women to filter everything through the gospel by asking how our actions impact the kingdom of God. The community continually reminds members to surrender to Jesus who brings freedom, energy, and excitement. * "If you’re walking with Jesus, where you are right now is where you’re called." – Somer * Whatever work you're doing, you are in a mission field. God has placed you there to be His representative to those around you. If you invest in people where you are and behave according to the gospel, it creates curiosity in the hearts of those around you and opens doors to speak truth into someone’s life. * All women work. Work is not defined by compensation. It’s an intentional effort that you take for the purpose of the glory of God. * So often we equate balance with perfection, so our pursuit of balance is futile. Give up chasing balance and surrender it to Jesus. When we seek God first, He shapes our desires. * “Attempting to make God equal with the rest of your life is going to equal chaos every single time.” – Michelle * Never be afraid to ask for help. * Leave margin in your schedule to love people. * Inspect the things you keep coming back to that keep leaving you dry. Those things steal energy from the things that truly matter. * Accept that you probably didn’t marry someone exactly like you, so you’ll likely have conflict. It’s not personal, they love you first and they see things differently. You don’t have to defend yourself. It’s a gift to have someone who sees things differently. * Lower your expectations of your spouse every day. We always expect more than we should. Marriage can’t be forced; it has to be organic. Have fun with each other and be intentional about it. There isn't a 5 step process to fix your marriage. It’ll look different for everyone. Too much pressure on marriage is what usually breaks it. * If you are juggling all the things, remember Matthew 6:33 ("Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.") and let it take root in your soul. * If you've been walking with Christ for a while, encourage someone who hasn’t by extending grace where they’re expecting too much of themselves and point them back to Jesus.
Let’s Get Real Practical: We get to decide who or what gets our energy. As a physical reminder, consider getting a piggy bank and write the word "energy" on it. Any time someone asks you to do something, look at it as more than time, but energy. Ask yourself if the return was worth the energy you spent on the task. Did it leave you feeling drained?
Resources Mentioned: SWHW Narrow Conference - November 5-6, 2021
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm talking with author Christy Wright about her new book Take Back Your Time: The Guilt-Free Guide to Life Balance. Christy is a #1 national best-selling author, personal development expert, and host of The Christy Wright Show. Since 2009, Christy has served at Ramsey Solutions, where she teaches on personal development, business, and faith.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * The #1 question Christy gets as a business coach is "How do you balance everything?" What she's come to realize is that balance isn’t something you do, it’s something you create in your life that looks like peace and confidence in your choices, as well as how you spend your time. You want to enjoy your life and be proud of how you spend your time; the path to that is not productivity.
* “Life balance is not doing everything for an equal amount of time, it’s about doing the right things at the right time.”
* 4 reasons we feel out of balance:
We're doing too much. Our time is finite. We have to make choices; we can’t fit it all in.
We're not doing enough. Possibly triggered by something major shifting in life leaving you feeling bored and out of balance.
Doing the wrong things. As long as you spend your life doing things that aren’t important to you, you’ll feel stressed, resentful, anxious, and angry.
Not doing the right things. We should be spending time on the things we actually care about - the things that are life-giving and valuable.
* Doing the wrong thing out of guilt or obligation, getting distracted, or even doing good things in the wrong season will take away time from what's important to you.
* We tend to swing to extremes because we love the impressive. But it’s not sustainable to be focused on everything all the time. It’s less impressive, but taking a small action is more sustainable and allows you to better engage in things that fill you up. Some is better than none. It may look different in different seasons, but what matters is you're spending time on something that’s important to you.
* You can help determine what matters to you most by asking what’s important right now? Ask yourself who you want to be. As you determine that, it will bring clarity to what you’re supposed to do and what matters most to you because it’s more about who we are than what we do.
* You get to determine what does and doesn't matter to you. We have more time than we think we do, we’re just spending it on things that are not the most important things to us. Ask yourself where you lose time.
* We've become addicted to productivity. You have permission to not do things that don’t matter to you. Every commitment on your calendar/task list represents a deeper motivation in you.
* You might be addicted to productivity if you can't sit still or are always thinking about what comes next. We feel the need for contact input, but our brains were created for rest to reflect and pray. It takes practice.
* “Productivity doesn’t lead to balance, doing the right things leads to us feeling balanced.”
* This is your life. No one gets to tell you what you should be important to you. How you spend your time is how you spend your life. Spend it on what matters most to you.
Let’s Get Real Practical: There is no such thing as balance, but there is such a thing as pressing into doing the right things that matter most to you in this season. Getting clear on what we’re called to helps relieve decision-making pressure.
Make a list of all the things you do weekly/monthly that require a commitment from you.
Circle the things that are non-negotiable.
Strikethrough any items you need to lay down or outsource.
When a new opportunity comes up, look at the list and see if it fits with what matters most to you in this season.
Resources Mentioned: Ep. 107: Get Back to You with Christy Wright
Humor, Seriously: Why Humor Is a Secret Weapon in Business and Life (And how anyone can harness it. Even you.)
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm chatting with author Lisa Whittle about her new book The Hard Good: Showing Up for God to Work in You When You Want to Shut Down. Lisa has published eight books and her wit and bold bottom-line approach have made her a sought-after Bible teacher. She is also the creator of a companion video Bible study for Jesus over Everything. A pastor’s daughter and longtime ministry leader in issues relevant to the church, Lisa is the founder of Ministry Strong and the popular Jesus over Everything podcast, which debuted in the top 25 of Christian podcasts. Her love runs deep to see people pursue Jesus for life, grow deep roots of faith, and walk strong in the midst of a world that so often seems to have gone crazy. She and her family live in North Carolina.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * "The Hard Good" is the stuff that is hard and most spiritually transformative if we allow God to use it and the emotions/feelings that thwart us in the process of change. * "God anoints and appoints, but usability is up to us." * Some things are just hard, but not spiritually transformative. The things God wants to use in our lives are often the hard things. But we can better endure the hard when we know there’s a purpose behind it. * We tend to live ignoring our feelings or feeling controlled by them. People of faith have often struggled in this area because of the false idea that it dishonors their faith. But the creator of the universe made us with emotions and feelings, so He’s the one to help us regulate them. * We need to have more hard conversations in the church about abuse, widows, refugees, race, etc. When the church won’t have tough conversations, the world leads the conversation and the church is left to respond when it should be leading. * As a Christian, you are called to make disciples wherever you have influence. Encourage hard conversations in the church and pray for your leaders. If you feel your church isn't aligning with your values, it may be time to leave. * “Instead of silencing tough conversations, let’s silence the fear of taking them on.” * We all fear getting into a hard conversation because we don’t know how it will turn out. If something continues to compel you after praying about it, it's probably time to address it. Praying and being in tune with the Holy Spirit is the best way to ensure a good conversation. * Before engaging online remember that anything that offers help apart from the power of God is not helpful. It will end in disaster because it’s a human providing a solution. Take time to process and pray before posting.
Let's Get Real Practical: It's time to face hard conversations head-on without fear. Ask God to show you what tough conversations He’s inviting you into and use these 3 tips to engage - pray, listen to the other person, and reflect what they said for clarification.
Resources Mentioned: Episode 60: Jesus Over Everything with Lisa Whittle
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Connect with Lisa: website | Instagram | Facebook
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking to author Sarah Bragg about her new book A Mother's Guide to Raising Herself. Sarah is also the host of the podcast Surviving Sarah. Along with being a master at brewing coffee and a champion of cheering for others, she is also a mother of two girls and a wife to Scott. She and her family reside in Tennessee.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * There's a lot of pressure that comes along with believing motherhood is your calling. If it is the greatest thing we can ever do, what about the women who don’t/can't have children? What happens when your kids grow up? Raising kids is valuable, but it doesn’t have to be a pressure point. It’s a relationship. * Perfectionism tells us that if we follow the formula and it doesn't work, it must be us. You have to get to the heart of who you are and what your kids need. Be aware of your tendency for perfectionism and don't use it as an affirmation of your worth. * Pay attention to your "should soundtrack." When you feel like you should do something, let it be an indicator to investigate further. Is that something that’s important or you want to do? Why do you feel pressure to do it? * Fear isn't a bad thing, but you can't let it drive you. Choose curiosity over judgment. Choose to trust in God. Staying focused on your goals will give you perspective. * The best way to communicate with girls about body image is by modeling healthy behaviors and appreciating your body for what it is. * Raising girls helped Sarah realize how her self-obsession with looks affected others and gave her perspective on how absurd the goals were that she had set for herself. * Stop comparing yourself to other women – including your former self. If we can accept where we are, there’s a freedom that follows. * Showing up is enough.
Let’s Get Real Practical: This week we're evaluating our "should soundtrack." What areas of your life do you feel defeated in? When you look at those areas, are you “shoulding” on yourself? Where did those "shoulds" come from?
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Connect with Sarah: website | Instagram | Facebook | podcast
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I’m chatting with my friend Rebekah Moes about her personal journey with infidelity in her marriage and God’s power of redemption. Bekah is a Jesus-loving mom-of-five from the DFW area. She and her husband Nick co-founded Family of Hope, a non-profit web-based resource for couples in crisis. Their podcast unFAITHFUL: redeeming infidelity reaches couples recovering from infidelity all over the world. Bekah is passionate about sharing her story and breaking the silence on a lonely road that many couples walk. She believes a healthy “we” starts with a healthy “me,” and knows that journey very well. She loves talking to women about how to live overflowing, Spirit-empowered lives first at home, and then in every sphere of influence.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Rebekah initially believed her husband’s pornography addiction was a “struggle” that would resolve itself after marriage, but after things worsened it became clear it was a heart issue. * Think of marriage as a mirror – your spouse reflects yourself back to you. “My spouse is not the problem, my spouse reveals the problem in me.” * If you’re going through a difficult season in your marriage, focus on finding your identity and self-worth, not casting blame. * When you numb one thing, you also become to other things, but it’s okay to be present in your numbness. Be exactly and fully where you are. * The process to stop numbing is long and slow, but “you don’t need all the steps, just the next one.” * The wound created by infidelity is unique and will require a support system from professionals and trusted friends. Regardless of if your spouse is ready to change, the first step is getting help for yourself. You can start with a trusted friend or pastor, but get counseling. * Any place there’s secrecy is a red flag. Ask what’s behind the secrecy – what are they/you afraid of? What’s keeping us from being fully open to one another? * “A healthy we starts with a healthy me.” * You can’t control your spouse, but you can set boundaries – boundaries are not an attempt to control someone else, but rather an attempt to protect yourself. * Not every spouse is going to choose the right path, but God’s healing is available regardless of how your spouse responds. “The hope is not in saving the marriage, the hope is in your life with the Lord and all of the future He has for you.”
Resources Mentioned: Gateway Church Conflict in Marriage resource
The Affair Recovery Center
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In a recent moment of panic, a mentor offered me some helpful insight - "Your best decisions come from a place of calm." I had become focused on what I was going to do rather than tapping into the power of God.
What unyielding obstacles are you facing today? Don’t panic. Instead, turn to God and trust in His power to do what’s impossible.
Discomfort is the price of admission to taking new territory.
Get around people who will look for the power of God instead of panicking and get into the Bible. It increases our faith to rely on His power.
Resource mentioned:
Care and Counsel Bible
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author Wendy Pope about her new book Jesus Everlasting: Leaning on Our Counselor, Defender, Father, and Friend. Wendy is the wife of Scott, mother of Blaire and Griffin, author, speaker, and Bible study teacher. She loves lazy Sundays watching golf with her husband, thrift-store shopping with her daughter, and watching building shows with her son. She is the author of several books - Jesus Everlasting, Hidden Potential, Yes, No, and Maybe and Wait and See. Wendy is the Founder and Executive Director of Word Up Ministries. She leads women all over the world to life change through her in-depth online Bible studies. She has led thousands of women through her Read Through the Word daily video study of the One Year Chronological Bible. Down-to-earth and transparent, Wendy teaches in a way that women feel she is speaking directly to their hearts.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Wendy's book Jesus Everlasting: Leaning on Our Counselor, Defender, Father, and Friend tells the stories of the everyday women in the Bible who had encounters with Jesus as the Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, the Everlasting Father, and the Prince of Peace. * Jesus is a defender who protects. The truth of His Word is our defense. We can stand on it when we have disagreements and be secure enough to walk away from things that aren’t healthy for us. * It’s hard to lean into a Heavenly Father you can’t see when an earthly father that you can has disappointed you. It’s a trust relationship that develops over time, but He will never let you down. Invest time getting to know God’s heart; read his word. Start in the Psalms. If you don’t understand, get a children’s Bible or the Living Bible. * When you're searching for peace in the midst of the storm, fake it until you feel it. Keep digging into God and His Word and the fruits of the spirit will take root. * “God is not instant because He wants to build a relationship with us and it takes time to do that.” * When we reflect on God's faithfulness, we're building a "faith bank." We make deposits when things are good and we can make withdrawals when you can’t feel it and know He’ll be faithful again. * If you want to recognize God in everyday life, you have to spend time with Him. Do everything to build your faith. * "We have to invest in the 411 (information) about God before we can feel Him in the 911 (emergencies).”
Let’s Get Real Practical: I have two questions to help you lean into Jesus:
Where in your life do you need to pull up a seat for Jesus?
What questions do you need to ask Him today?
Be sure to take time to listen for His response.
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Connect with Wendy: website | Instagram | Facebook
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author Lauren Chandler about her book With Us in the Wilderness: A Study of the Book of Numbers. Lauren is a wife and mother of three. Her husband, Matt Chandler, serves as the lead teaching pastor at The Village Church in Flower Mound, Texas. Lauren is passionate about writing, music, and leading worship, not only at The Village Church, but also for groups across the country. She is the author of the recently released Bible study, With Us in the Wilderness: A Study of the Book of Numbers, Steadfast Love: The Response of God to the Cries of our Heart, the Bible study, Steadfast Love: A Study of Psalm 107, and a children’s book, Goodbye to Goodbyes: A True Story about Jesus, Lazarus, and an Empty Tomb.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * God’s plan has always involved women and His heart is for women. In Numbers, the test for adultery can be seen as patriarchal, but the heart of God was to give women a chance to vindicate themselves in a male-dominated society. * Pause, breathe, and pray for illumination as you lean into reading the harder parts of the Bible. Ask the Lord for clarity, keep reading, and read it again. * God can speak in a variety of ways, but we know it’s Him if it’s consistent with the character of God we see in the Bible. * "God uses wilderness seasons to show that life is best when centered on Him." When we’re the center, we end up worn out and enslaved. * "We can’t be who God created us to be outside of community." Seek out community and give people opportunities to be trustworthy. It takes time and you will get hurt, but God has called us to be vulnerable, listen without judgment, and show loving-kindness. * If you've been hurt before in relationships, own your part and ask forgiveness where you messed up and try again, asking the Holy Spirit for discernment. * Your wilderness won't last forever. God is with you in it and He won't waste it. Fight against shame and condemnation if you need to rest. You don't have to do anything; He is pleased in your being because of Christ.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Process and pray, asking God these questions - Where are you in this wilderness season? God, where am I in this wilderness season?
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Connect with Lauren: website | Instagram | Facebook
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This week I've really felt God urging me to tell you this - you have the authority to stand your ground, especially in the territories God has entrusted you with.
Through the power of Christ, you can tell the enemy that he cannot take any more territory that has not been given to him.
What is a territory that the enemy has been messing with? I'm standing with you in prayer!
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm chatting with the author of The Joy of Being a Mom, Judy Brisky. Judy has been married to Mike for 31 years. They have two sons: Jacob married to Neeli with 2 baby boys, Bennett and Everrett; Joel married to Danny, they're expecting their baby girl in November. Judy has served in various ministries at her church including worship, women's, marriage, teaching, and speaking. Her heart has always been to encourage moms and when the Lord made a way for her to write a book, it was a huge blessing. She truly believes that we can have joy as moms even in difficult situations because the Lord is good and faithful and He will always be there for us!
Key Points from Our Conversation: * We all face hard seasons as moms, but we can find joy in parenting because joy isn't based on our circumstances. Joy comes from knowing God's love and trusting Him to see us through anything. * Timing is everything. "The when is just as important to God as the what." * God loves you and sees you. He knows the season you’re in and He has a purpose for your life. * We may know about the faithfulness of God, but to live within the faithfulness of God is life-changing. We can trust Him over our circumstances. “Because I have a great God, I have a great life.” * It's natural to be sad and healthy to grieve, but we can't stay stuck in that place. God is faithful even when we don't understand. * So many times God doesn't answer our prayers how we want, but we can trust that He always has a plan for us that includes joy and peace through difficult circumstances. It comes down to how much we trust God despite what’s happening. * “When we find the joy in God’s love, we experience the peace regardless of our circumstances.” * God wants to be with you in your grief. He loves you. He still hears you. He’s listening. Seek him above your prayer requests. When we seek Him first, everything we pray for falls second. He will give us what we need. * Let people going through difficult seasons that you love them and you're praying for them. Ask if they have any specific prayer requests or offer a way to serve them.
Let’s Get Real Practical: What "but even if He doesn't" moment came to your mind during this episode? When you think of it, what feelings came up?
Have you really allowed yourself to process the pain or disappointment?
What lies might you have believed in that season?
What truth is God speaking over you today?
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Connect with Judy: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking to the Executive Pastor of Adult Ministries at Gateway Church, Bridgette Morris. She and her husband, James, have been married for 12 years. They have three beautiful kids, two boys, and a girl, who keep them on their toes but are always good for a snuggle. She loves the outdoors and can often be found with her hands in the dirt, tending her garden, or working on a project. Bridgette has been part of Gateway Church since 2008, serving in various ministries and creative areas, including Gateway Worship as a vocalist and worship pastor, and Gateway Performing Arts. She loves living out her passion to see women fully equipped to walk out the calling God has placed on their lives.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * We have to let go of the perception that everyone else is killing it. No one is "doing it all". * You can do everything, but not at the same time. Be mindful, purposeful, and intentional with what you're doing. * We have a lot of responsibilities, authority, and opportunities to do a lot of things, but we need to realize that for one thing to thrive, another thing will suffer. * It's time to let go of perfectionism. Some things won’t get 100% of you. It might be time to consider what you can outsource. There will be other seasons where you can pick things back up, but if it’s not the priority now, let it go. * Bridgette is living her mission to inspire women to live a Christian life, encourage those who are trudging through, and equip them so they can take action through Gateway Women. * Inspiration is the motivation to get started. Encouragement is for when you’re in the middle of it. It’s easy to get inspired, it’s hard to keep pushing through. * Be aware of who's around you and listen to the Holy Spirit. Look for people in need of encouragement. Women are gifted at discernment, so lead with compassion and things will fall into place. * It’s hard to encourage someone you’re comparing yourself to. Flip the script. Cheer her on and pray for her. * Equipping is the practical how-tos. Determine what's on your plate and what you can take off of it – what has the Lord put on it and what did you add? Also, consider what it would look like to apply the practical application of your strengths. * Being aware of your season, strengths, and weaknesses is the key to being effective in your life. Once you know those things, you can determine the resources you need. * Give yourself a break. We all want to be our best. God knows our heart, so on the days when you feel like you're failing, give yourself a break. He's giving you more grace than you’re accepting. Allow yourself to receive it.
Let's Get Real Practical: What balls are you currently juggling? List them all. It's helpful to see them.
What ball/balls is God saying it's okay to drop? Mark them off the list.
Which balls have dropped that shattered? God is in the business of cleaning up our mess.
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Connect with Bridgette: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author Kelsey Chapman about her new book What They Taught Me: Recognizing the Mentors Who Will Take You from Dream to Done. Kelsey is also a podcaster and personal cheerleader to women building their dream life and business. When she first launched her brand in 2015, she felt all the overwhelming feelings, too. It was scary to take such a huge leap and commit to showing up for a dream she didn’t know would pan out. Mentorship is what pushed her to rise up and continue making her dream a reality. Over the first few years of business, she leaned on the shoulders of several incredible mentors who took her under their wing and taught her how to make the jump from dreamer to doer. Kelsey needed their expert wisdom to shift old perspectives, discover the next right steps that would help her execute the vision, and stay hopeful throughout the journey. Her mentors helped shape her character so she could become the CEO and leader she is today. Now she is excited to pay it forward and be that cheerleader for you, too… because she believes YOU can turn your wildest dreams into REALITY.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Mentors are people who are willing to step in and share what they know. They won't be perfect, but they are present and consistent. * Seeking a mentor is uncomfortable. You might get rejected or ghosted, but it's not personal. Trust that the Lord will provide the right mentor for you if you keep putting yourself out there. * Mentorship relationships can look different. Some might be local, some virtual. Some might be paid mentorships if the person is spending a lot of time mentoring. * If you find yourself low on energy, you might be giving away what you know to too many people. Pray and ask God if this is the right season for mentorship and who you should invest in. * Mentors can help you avoid burnout by providing the accountability to keep you focused on your main goals. * If you're seeking a mentor, start by putting yourself out there by finding groups in person or online with shared interests. * If your want to be a mentor, start before you feel ready. You will never feel equipped, but you can put checks and balances in place for when you don't have the big answers. "Your presence is enough."
Let's Get Real Practical: Contemplate these questions this week -
Are you in a season of needing a mentor, being a mentor, or both?
What specific traits are you looking for in a mentor in this season of your life?
What can you offer to a mentee?
Connect with Kelsey: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
A few weeks ago, my husband and I did a vision retreat in Mexico where we answered questions that challenged us to reflect and hear God for the next year for our family. The resounding word that we walked away from that time with was simple but powerful - "follow the peace, not the pressure."
In our home, we talk often about the following peace because Jesus is peace. But with "not the pressure" God reminded us to slow down and stop letting pressure that’s not from Him lead us astray.
Where do you need to follow the peace instead of the pressure?
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This episode of Real Talk with Rachael is a bit different because I'm sharing parts of a podcast panel I was part of with author Jess Connolly about her new book Breaking Free from Body Shame. Jess Connolly is a woman who wants to leave her generation more in awe of God than she found it. She is passionate about family, God's Word, and seeing women take their place in the kingdom. She loves communicating, coffee, color, and the local church. Jess and her husband Nick live in Charleston, SC where they've planted Bright City Church. They have four wild and hilarious kids: Elias, Gloriana, Benjamin, and Cannon. They also have an unruly dog named Deacon.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * We need different perspectives on body image. Each person offers something unique and freedom will look different for everyone. * The first step in finding freedom from body shame is admitting that we don't feel okay with our bodies. Jesus came to offer abundant life; there is freedom and healing available through Him. * We must address the root of shame to begin to understand how it has affected our image of ourselves. * Ask yourself what true body freedom would look like for you practically, physically, mentally, and spiritually. It may mean changing your priorities. * Social media didn't create our body image issues, but it hasn't helped. Everyone is lying about how they look and it's making us hate the way we look. * Statistics show that almost all of us, both females and males, struggle with body image. If your loved ones aren't supportive who aren't supportive in your efforts to break free, remember that you can love someone and disagree with them. Have honest, vulnerable conversations and set healthy boundaries.
Resources Mentioned: Biblical body image coloring book
Breaking Free from Body Shame
Let's Get Real Practical: If you missed it, go back and listen to my 4 episode Talk Therapy miniseries, Your Body is Blessed.
Connect with Jess: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This is the final episode in this series to reclaim & restore your body image. You will need the Biblical body image coloring book I created especially for you. To download it for free, head to rachaelgilbert.com/biblicalbodyimage. This week we're going through the sheet about apologizing to our bodies.
If you don’t have them yet, no worries, you can still glean nuggets of wisdom from this episode. We spent all last month teaching so these episodes are more focused on reflecting and leaning into what God wants to say to us.
It’s time for a ceasefire on our bodies and it starts by making an apology.
What has your body done for you? We are going to thank her. But first, let’s apologize.
This is the third episode in this series to reclaim & restore your body image. You will need the Biblical body image coloring book I created especially for you. To download it for free, head to rachaelgilbert.com/biblicalbodyimage. This week we're going through the emotions maze.
If you don’t have them yet, no worries, you can still glean nuggets of wisdom from this episode. We spent all last month teaching so these episodes are more focused on reflecting and leaning into what God wants to say to us.
Last week we challenged our thoughts. This week let’s feel our feelings.
Reflect on your thoughts about your body. What feelings arise? Lean into them. Don’t dismiss them.
This is the second episode in this series to reclaim and restore your body image. You will need the Biblical body image coloring book I created especially for you. To download it for free, head to rachaelgilbert.com/biblicalbodyimage. This week we're looking at the coloring sheet that helps us put our thought on trial.
If you don’t have them yet, no worries, you can still glean nuggets of wisdom from this episode. We spent all last month teaching, so these episodes are more focused on reflecting and leaning into what God wants to say to us.
Today I'm talking about the importance of reframing our thoughts because our thoughts affect our feelings and feelings affect our behaviors.
Put your thoughts on trial. What thoughts have you said internally or out loud about your body?
This is the first episode in this series to reclaim and restore your body image. You will need the Biblical body image coloring book I created especially for you. To download it for free, head to rachaelgilbert.com/biblicalbodyimage. This week we're reviewing the coloring sheet for our temple.
If you don’t have it yet, no worries, you can still glean nuggets of wisdom from this episode. We spent all last month teaching, so these episodes are more focused on reflecting and leaning into what God wants to say to us.
In order to reclaim body image, we have to know what we are restoring. Let’s take some time to challenge what we know to be true about our bodies.
Body image defined: the subjective picture or mental image of one’s own body.
Subjective defined: based on or influenced by personal feelings, tastes, or opinions.
Who or what defines body image for you? Does it line up with the truth from God’s word?
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with artist, podcaster, and writer, Michelle Acker. Her mission is to create an uprising of calm and pretty in God's creation, both people and places. She has a passion for teaching women how to take Simple Steps toward taking control of their mental wellness. She shares those tips on her Simple Steps to Thrive Podcast. She also creates art that reflects the beauty of God's creation using beeswax and a blowtorch.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Michelle says that fitness is the key to keeping her mental health on track and God has used her joy to help set other people free from depression and anxiety. * It's the little actions that add up. Go on a short walk, get enough sleep, eat real foods, address chaos happening in your home or relationships. * Our body isn't the enemy, it's alerting us to things that need to be addressed and healed. * There isn’t a formula to develop a healthy body image, but it’s a very real struggle. We break free through conversations and partnering with the Holy Spirit and Jesus. * Instead of shaming our bodies, we can literally thank them for what they provide for us, even if they don't look the way we would prefer. * "My body reflects God's image." Not physically, but the light that is within us reflects God's goodness. That's what connects people to God. * God didn't design us to be concerned with the physical appearance of our bodies. * One step to thrive is to write out and recite daily statements of truth about your body, values, and goals. Investigate your mindset about your body and ask God what He's saying to you about it. Get curious about what your body is telling you. * "Kindness is key." Let go of what you want the reflection in the mirror to look like. Focus on how you want to feel inside and how well you want your body to feel.
Resources Mentioned: The Body Keeps the Score
Connect with Michelle: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
We are taking a break from our normal guest interviews this summer to dive into the topic of body image. These episodes aired originally on this podcast two years ago and God dropped it on my heart to release them again this summer, so if you listened before, I highly encourage you to listen again.
Today we are chatting about simple steps to have a strong body. This is not going to be rocket science. These are principles you can apply immediately with no tricks, gadgets, or gimmicks!
Resources Mentioned:
- Renewed: 21 Day Faith & Fitness Plan
- Revelation Wellness
- Faster Way to Fat Loss
- The Back & Body Clinic
Be sure to download our Biblical body image therapeutic coloring book at rachaelgilbert.com/biblicalbodyimage!
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
We are taking a break from our normal guest interviews this summer to dive into the topic of body image. These episodes aired originally on this podcast two years ago and God dropped it on my heart to release them again this summer, so if you listened before, I highly encourage you to listen again.
This week we are chatting about the power of a submitted heart and a sound mind when it comes to having a Biblical body image.
Be sure to download our Biblical body image therapeutic coloring book at rachaelgilbert.com/biblicalbodyimage!
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
We are taking a break from our normal guest interviews this summer to dive into the topic of body image. These episodes aired originally on this podcast two years ago and God dropped it on my heart to release them again this summer, so if you listened before, I highly encourage you to listen again.
In this episode, we dive into 5 reasons I believe we struggle with body image issues.
Be sure to download our Biblical body image therapeutic coloring book at rachaelgilbert.com/biblicalbodyimage!
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
We are taking a break from our normal guest interviews this summer to dive into the topic of body image. These episodes aired originally on this podcast two years ago and God dropped it on my heart to release them again this summer, so if you listened before, I highly encourage you to listen again.
In this episode, we dive into 5 reasons I believe we struggle with body image issues.
Be sure to download our Biblical body image therapeutic coloring book at rachaelgilbert.com/biblicalbodyimage!
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm speaking with singer, songwriter, and author Ginny Owens about finding hope - the topic of her new book Singing in the Dark. Ginny became a household name as the Gospel Music Association’s 2000 New Artist of the Year. Growing in notoriety as both a singer and a songwriter, winning 3 Dove awards and multiple ASCAP Awards along the way, Owens has sold over a million records over the course of her career. A top performer on the Christian radio charts with hits like “If You Want Me To,” “Free” and “I Wanna Be Moved” among others, Owens has released no less than 11 full albums and 3 EPs, and her music has also impacted mainstream audiences at Lilith Fair, the Sundance Film Festival and the White House.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Her experience of living with blindness helped inspire her new book. We all live with an element of darkness in our lives on this side of heaven that distorts our view of God and therefore our hope in Him. Singing in the Dark talks about what it looks like to find lasting hope through engaging scripture with song. * There's always a negative message that repeats in our minds, often about our value. Once that "dark song" becomes stuck in our heads, it's difficult to overpower its message with love. We must replace our song our doubt with the truth of our worth in God's Word. Like anything else we want to get good at, it will take daily practice. * In her Song for Inner Peace chapter, Ginny talks about Paul's letter to the church from prison found in Philippians 4. Despite his circumstances, he knew that Christ was the secret. The bigger Paul's view of Jesus became, the more that he believed Jesus was powerful enough to handle every pain, sorrow, and fear he was facing. The more he was about Jesus' work, his earthly circumstances lessened in comparison. He saw a Jesus who loved him enough to suffer and die for him, so he knew he was never alone. * “The bigger our view of Jesus gets, the more can walk through whatever comes next.” * If you want to expand your view of Jesus, start by meditating on Philippians 4:4-13. We tend to think the more scripture we read the better, but God instructs us to spend time thinking about what it says about who Jesus is and who we are. Invite God to speak to you through scripture. * Resting requires intentionality. Set aside time for things that fill you like community, purposefully setting aside time to spend with God, and even napping. * We get burned out when we're driven by anything but Jesus. God never wants us to be depleted of our resources, but it requires self-discipline to determine what we need to operate best and trust God the most. * Accountability requires showing up and being vulnerable with the people you trust and admitting you can't do it alone.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Our simple steps this week center around accountability.
- Find in-person community
- Let your community in
- Listen to trusted people when they speak into your life
Episode Sponsor: Sign up for JOYmail – my monthly newsletter that’s full of resources that deliver a little joy and practical action steps for life into your inbox.
Connect with Ginny: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm chatting with bestselling author and speaker, Nicki Koziarz. As a part of Proverbs 31 Ministries, she speaks nationally at conferences, retreats, and meetings and hosts her own podcast. An evangelist at heart, Nicki inspires others to become the best version of who God created them to be. Nicki and her husband and three girls run a small farm just outside of Charlotte, North Carolina, which they affectionately call The Fixer Upper Farm.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * “The timing of God is never rushed by the impatience of man.” Although the idea for Flooded was the concept for her first book, it was rejected several times. Instead, she wrote it in the midst of deep loss, grief, and stress. * After losing her mom to cancer and her brother to suicide just two years apart, Nicki's faith was shaken. Doubt started stirring inside of her and she wondered how she could trust God again. * When it comes to our faith, we have to be intentional about making decisions that strengthen us and combat the doubt inside of us. * Wishful thinking uses scripture as a band-aid by applying promises God made to others to our situations. Biblical hope is taking the time to understand the scriptures, which promises are for us, and what we can claim through faith today. * For every struggle we face, there’s someone in scripture who’s gone through it who can teach what it’s like to overcome with faith in God. She was drawn to the story of Noah who made 5 steps of faith. * Noah's first step was walking with God. Walking with God is a private, holy place where we decide to get into the trenches with God. This is where we get our strength. * Noah's second step was listening to God. It's easy to use the noise around us as comfort or distraction. It’s an incredible spiritual discipline to practice being still with God. * The voice of God will never tell you anything that contradicts scripture or anything that goes against His character. * The brain never stops changing – you can stop believing something at any point. Rising above doubt will require you to retrain your brain. * You can’t protect yourself from naysayers, but it’s up to you what you do with their words. * If you're struggling with doubt, you’re not alone. * “God, if I have it wrong show me the right way. But if I have it right, help me to stand still until I have this promise fulfilled.” * There are times when we get it wrong and we should admit that. We need to do the hard work of being still and wait for growth.
Let’s Get Real Practical: When your emotions are flooded, start by taking time out and doing something to calm down, then practice deep breathing exercises or progressive muscle relaxation.
Episode Sponsor: Join the free Loved and Blessed community now at lovedandblessedladies.com and find out more about their monthly membership at lovedandblessed.com.
Connect with Nicki: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author Jeannie Cunnion about her new book Don’t Miss Out: Daring to Believe Life is Better with the Holy Spirit. Jeannie is well known for writing stories that make much of the wild love of Jesus because of how her life has been rescued by it. She is also a beloved Bible teacher and sought-after speaker who has been featured on outlets such as the TODAY show, Fox News, The 700 Club, and Focus on the Family. Jeannie, who holds a master’s degree in social work, worked as a counselor and trainer in the adoption field before writing. She is a wife to Mike and a mama to five boys she is crazy about.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * God equips us for what He's called us to do. If we let our feelings of inadequacy stop us from pursuing our God-given dreams, we forfeit the supernatural work in our lives. * The Holy Spirit is undervalued in the church, but He is equal to God and Jesus and essential for a thriving faith. When we view Him as such, we become open to His very distinct purpose in our lives. * Most people assume that the Holy Spirit is for the extremes, but it's a gift from Jesus. He gave us a friend so that we'd never be without Him, so it makes sense that the enemy would distort our view of Him. * Speaking in tongues is a spiritual gift that brings intimacy into the relationship with the Holy Spirit. Not everyone will receive this gift, but if you do, you should embrace it. It's encouragement for your spirit. * Spiritual gifts are appointed by the Holy Spirit, everyone has at least one, they are meant for the common good, and should be used to build the church. * If you want to learn more about the Holy Spirit, start by reading John 14-16, as well as Galatians, Romans, and Ephesians. * Christ's power, the disciple's power, and our power comes from the Holy Spirit. He gives us the strength we need to fulfill what God has called us to. * "If we have the Spirit of God, we have everything we need.”
Resources mentioned: Don’t Miss Out: Daring to Believe Life is Better with the Holy Spirit
Hillsong Worship "Fresh Wind"
Let’s Get Real Practical: Ask yourself these 2 questions this week - what do you believe about the Holy Spirit? What is your relationship with Him - is He your best friend or is He distant?
Episode Sponsor: Daily Kairos – get 20% off when you visit rachaelgilbert.com/dailykairos and use the promo code REALTALK20 at checkout!
Connect with Jeannie: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author Jennifer Dukes Lee about her new book Growing Slow: Lessons on Un-Hurrying Your Heart from an Accidental Farm Girl. Jennifer lives on the fifth-generation Lee family farm in Iowa, where she and her husband are raising crops, pigs, and two beautiful humans. She writes books, loves queso, and enjoys singing too loudly to songs with great harmony. Once upon a time, she didn't believe in Jesus; now he's her CEO.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Jennifer has lived a life of "go big or go home," but the problem was more than what was on her calendar, it was her hurried heart. A change in her physical condition required a mindset shift. Once she embraced the mindset, growing slow became her superpower. * We don’t always cheer people who grow slow, but overnight success is a myth. * Seeing life through the lens of a farmer changed Jennifer's understanding of what it means to grow slow. She paid attention to what God was doing in different seasons. * We get distracted with upward growth, but what will anchor us through drought and storms are our deep roots. * We'd like to stay in the three phases of planting, growth, and harvest, but we all experience winters of the soul. We weren’t designed to grow all the time. Winter is important to the land and it makes it better in the spring. We should allow winter to do its work in us, too. * 2020 has been a season of prolonged winter. Before we jump back into a season of growth, we should consider what this winter has taught us. * Growing slow forces buried issues to the surface much like the winter forces rocks to the surface of fields. What if we allowed winter to do the work in us, lifting the burdens that we carry and then allow God to "pick rock" from our lives? * We treat time as an enemy, but God and time are friends. We’re not falling behind, we just don’t see it the way God does. We constantly run toward new milestones, but never enjoy what's already growing. Validate the small things that are growing where God has placed you. * “Hurry hangs around your heart." There aren’t easy steps to growing slow - it’s a mindset shift that takes time to work its way to the roots. * Sustainable agriculture makes the land beneficial for generations. We can be sustainable people by thinking longer-term about how we are impacting future generations. It's the little things we do as parents that help establish deep roots for our kids. * It can seem impossible to grow slow, but you can slow down without losing your edge. Growing slow eliminates multitasking and helps you laser focus on your priorities.
3 Practical Steps to Enjoy the Season You're In: * Set your alarm 10 minutes earlier and set the tone of your day. * Stop checking the phone when you're away from work or in the middle of activities. Knowing about what you need to do when you are unable to do it creates a hurried mind. * Embrace the concept of the slow food movement by eating mindfully, giving your brain time to tell your body you’re full and enjoy the process of eating.
Resources mentioned: Growing Slow Bible Study Videos, Guided Journal and Growth Tracker, and Bible Study Guide Session 1
Let’s Get Real Practical: If possible, start by downloading Jennifer's printables mentioned in this episode. What did God bring up today that He wants to move out of your heart? Write it down.
You can mail your "rock" to Jennifer at PO BOX 327 Inwood, Iowa, 51240, and/or take a screenshot and send it to me on Instagram so that we can pray over you.
Episode Sponsor: Sign up for JOYmail – my monthly newsletter that’s full of resources that deliver a little joy and practical action steps for life into your inbox.
Connect with Jennifer: website | Instagram
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Talk Therapy I want to share a story of redemption. Our world is full of heartbreaking news and I wanted to share a story that builds your faith.
A fun fact you may not know about me is that my son and I share a birthday (May 4th) and every year it serves as a reminder of the goodness and redeeming power of God.
He is my rainbow baby. How about you? What has been lost perhaps even in this last year of the pandemic? Be bold and ask God to redeem it. Start by pouring out how you feel then have faith to believe God will do what he says.
John 10:10, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."
When God redeems, he brings healing into the area the enemy brought destruction.
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with recording artist Rachael Lampa. Rachael has been enjoying music industry success since her teen years, yet ask her what her richest accomplishments are, and you’ll hear a lot more about the relationships that have formed her on the road, the fans that have become dear friends, the beauty that has bridged impossible gaps in ministry to the marginalized and the miracle of her own growing family and sense of home. Even while her own story continues to unfold, Rachael’s driving passion is to elevate the stories of those around her, using the vehicle of soul-filled music to help her access hearts in a way nothing else could. Faithful is an organic continuation of Rachael’s journey, connecting the souls of modern women with the heroines of the Bible who birthed their spiritual heritage and proved time and again a God completely devoted.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Rachael got a record deal after singing at a Christian festival when she was 14. For the next 8 years, she toured regularly and released new music. Living a life filled with travel and music at an early age allowed her to build deep trust in God and develop a unique relationship with Him. * "God speaks through fun." We are innately drawn to fun things that bring us joy - it's part of God's design. * After spending time working with women in prisons and jail and being inspired by God's faithfulness to them, Rachael decided when she got back into music, she would write for them, to them, and about them. The Faithful project is a fulfillment of that commitment. * The project features authors and artists coming together to tell the story of God’s faithfulness in and through the women of the Bible. * Throughout the writing process, Rachael found multiple comparisons between the women God partnered with in the Bible and the women she met in prison. He was faithful then and He remains faithful now. * If you're in need of encouragement, remember there is power in the name of Jesus. You don't need to have all the words, just say His name and invite Him to wash over your situation. * There is power in partnering with other women and being able to see and hear each other without a time restraint or agenda. When we make space for God to move, He births new ideas.
Resources mentioned: Faithful Livestream - May 1, 2021 at 7:00pm CST
Faithful (book)
Faithful (album)
That Sounds Fun Podcast
Let’s Get Real Practical: In this episode we talk not only about God's faithfulness, but how much fun He is. This week I encourage you to think about what is fun to you and make time to do one of those things this week. Also, ask God to show you how to make any situation fun.
Episode Sponsor: Sign up for JOYmail – my monthly newsletter that’s full of resources that deliver a little joy and practical action steps for life into your inbox.
Connect with Rachael Lampa: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael Gilbert: website | Instagram | Facebook
Today's episode is a bit different than my regular Talk Therapy. I recently gave a TED Talk for my university that many of you said you were interested in hearing about EMDR and emotional eating. I'm presenting this from an academic standpoint, but it contains great content from professional journal articles. I encourage you to lean in and see the Holy Spirit wants to teach you in this conversation.
Resource mentioned: EMDR International Association
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with Dr. Irini Fambro. She's is a wife and mother, teacher and student, speaker and listener. She and her high school love, Kenneth, have two children: Kalila and Kenneth. Irini's passion is to increase the contributions within organizations through valuing a greater definition of intelligence. Out of that desire, Intelligent Leadership was birthed from her dissertation work on Multiple Intelligence in leadership. Her experience includes a BS in Business Administration with a concentration in management from The University of Alabama, was ordained through the Wesleyan Church, and gained her Masters of Divinity from Beeson Divinity School while being a youth pastor for five years. Following that season, she became a college pastor, curriculum development contributor, and wrote Made for More. She completed her Ph.D. in Organizational Leadership with a concentration in Ecclesial from Regent University. Currently, she consults into churches on Intelligent Leadership content, teaches at TKU, as well as preaches at churches.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * "Gifts are an expression of a partnership with God." * Our identity is not based on our gifts. When we separate the two, God protects our identity which is based on who He says we are. * "God wants to partner with you, not use you." * When we say God wants to "use" us, it begins to reflect that He's okay with things happening as a means to win more people. * It doesn’t honor God give Him all the credit and cut ourselves out of the equation. It implies that we’re disposable to Him and that if He doesn’t use us, He’ll just use someone else. What we fail to do creates a spiritual consequence on earth. * “Are things really getting worse or have we stepped back from the places we’re supposed to own?” * Personality is an expression of who we are, but it’s not our identity. How you express who you are is different and how we get to express our gifts gets to be different. You rob the world of what you’re supposed to bring when you mimic others. God designed you intentionally. * Healing comes in layers. When you find yourself facing the same thing over and over, be intentional to observe what’s happening around the situation. Ask what else God wants to show you to heal another layer. * “Walking in your gift is an expression of your partnership with God.” * We can become so confident in our gift that we stop consulting God on what He’s trying to partner with us to accomplish. You’ll know you're using your gift in an unhealthy way if it’s not for the other person’s benefit or it doesn’t produce good fruit.
An Overview of 3 Categories of Gifts: Gifts of Jesus - In Ephesians 4:7-16 are the five supernatural grace gifts that Jesus appointed, often called the five-fold ministry:
- Apostles
- Prophets
- Teachers
- Pastors (Shepherds)
- Evangelists
Gifts of God’s Grace - The next set are the gifts of God and are found in Romans 12:6-8.
- Prophesy
- Serving
- Teaching
- Encouragement
- Giving
- Leadership
- Compassion (Mercy)
Gifts of the Holy Spirit - The third group is called the gifts of the Holy Spirit found in I Corinthians 12:8-10 and I Corinthians 12:27-28
- Word of Wisdom
- Word of Revelation Knowledge
- Gift of Faith
- Gifts of Healing
- Power to Work Miracles
- Gift of Prophecy
- A gift to discern what the Spirit is speaking
- Gift of speaking different kinds of tongues
- Gift of the interpretation of tongues
Let’s Get Real Practical: This Let's Get Real Practical section is an exercise to explore your spiritual gifts, but before I address that, I want you to answer these two questions -
What did God speak to you about your views of being used by Him?
Have you mistaken your gifts for your identity?
Once you've determined that, ask what areas, topics, regions, or people are you drawn to?
What areas give you life?
What areas of your life are you seeing fruit?
What areas do you give the most time?
Is there peace or fulfillment when you operate in that area?
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As a counselor in training, I have discovered that many people suffer from chronic stress and anxiety simply because they do not allow themselves to feel the emotions that arise. Anger and other emotions are normal human responses.
Ephesians 4:26 says:
"Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger..."
You’ve probably heard sermons before that remind us anger itself is not the problem, rather it is the sin that follows that anger.
I believe anger gets lodged in our hearts when we fail to process it. It then gets expressed in ways that we don’t even notice….such as passive-aggressiveness, avoidance, and stonewalling, and not letting others in.
Here are four simple ways to feel and release your anger:
- Talk to God about it.
- Journal about it.
- Talk to the person about it.
- Anger iceberg exercise. The Anger Iceberg represents the idea that, although anger is displayed outwardly, other emotions may be hidden beneath the surface. These other feelings—such as sadness, fear, or guilt—might cause a person to feel vulnerable, or they may not have the skills to manage them effectively.
Download the Anger Iceberg worksheet from Therapist Aid here.
Lean into whatever you are feeling today and take space to process it with God.
Here are two questions to ponder:
- What emotions have I been stuffing lately?
- How is the stuffing process working? Is it showing up in other areas of my life?
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with the host of the Truth for your Twenties podcast, Katie Bulmer. The mission behind everything Katie does is to be who she needed when she was younger. She is an author and keynote speaker to over 50 colleges nationwide, mom of two girls, TikTok creator, and a big fan of guacamole.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Katie was a quiet child who never could have imagined God would call her to public speaking. After a meltdown in adulthood, she realized was focusing her reach on the wrong audience and God was calling her to speak to women in sororities - women who were similar to her when she was younger. * The Biblical story of the woman at the well revealed to Katie that she was filling up her cup with things that were temporary. The revelation that she was looking for another human to heal her broken places was a game-changer for her. * Katie came to believe that sorority girls can change the world after seeing their influence while working in marketing. She focused on how sororities can use their trendsetting power for good in their communities and the world. * Katie felt conflicted when asked to speak to women in venues that didn't allow her to speak about Jesus until her friend Jeff helped her realize that she didn't have to preach to live out the gospel. * “I don’t have to quote John 4, I can be John 4.” * If you're looking for how to start, look at where God is already working and join in. You don't need a 5-year plan, you only need to know the next step. * If you want to find your voice and feel comfortable using it, you need accountability and practice. Social media is a beautiful tool to utilize for practice. Consistency matters. * Everyone has something to bring to the table. Even if what you offer looks similar to what someone else has to offer, God has gifted you with specific giftings. There's room for everyone at the table. * Don't wait for the perfect time to get started. The only way to get ahead is to get started. It’s okay to be scared, just take one step in front of the other. Your voice is needed.
Let’s Get Real Practical: When we lean into God's voice, we find ours. This week ask God to reveal the area in your life that you're not hearing His voice. Then ask Him which area or group has He called you to serve.
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This week I felt God drop it on my heart to speak to you about why we need to retreat in order to advance. This word came to me for the JOYmail newsletter I send once a month. By the way, if you aren’t on that list click here to join.
I love to look to Jesus to learn how to set healthy boundaries and create space to process emotions. Jesus would often retreat to a quiet place to be alone and pray.
And he said to them, “Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest awhile.” For many were coming and going, and they had no leisure even to eat. Mark 6:31
We live in a world that does not give us natural pauses to retreat so we must be intentional about this practice.
This week take a look at your schedule and set intentional times to retreat.
We must first retreat to be refueled before we can charge into what God has in store for us.
Retreat to be recharged and released in his timing.
During this retreat, it’s a good time to process emotions.
Next week on talk therapy we will discuss why it’s OK to feel anger and other hard emotions.
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author Kat Armstrong about her new book The In-Between Place. Kat was born in Houston, TX where the humidity ruins her curls. She is a powerful Mexi-German Bible teacher and author of two books (No More Holding Back and The In-Between Place). As the co-founder of The Polished Network, an outreach to working women navigating careers and exploring faith, she is invested in the lives of women eager to learn about how the scriptures are relevant to their everyday lives. She has a master's degree from Dallas Seminary and she is starting her Doctorate in New Testament context next year in 2022. She and her husband Aaron have been married for eighteen years, and live in Dallas, TX with their son Caleb and attend Dallas Bible Church where Aaron serves as the lead pastor.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * In her first book No Holding Back, Kat challenges us to ask, “Why am I allowing limitations on my pursuit of Jesus’s calling?” By debunking five common myths about women, she invites readers to discover the joy and freedom of being all in for Jesus. * Her latest book The In-Between Place was inspired by her own experience of grief and its parallel to the story of the woman at the well in John 4. * Kat defines the in-between as "a place where people don't want to go and they don’t want to stay." It's a place where you find yourself asking how you got there. * “In between places can make us feel hopeless, but they can also be our most hope-filled places.” * Jesus' conversation with the Samaritan woman is the longest recorded in the New Testament. He took the time to meet her needs when she was depleted. * We have the wrong impression of the woman at the well. Women at that time were only valued if married and could produce a male heir. The woman was likely infertile and widowed and the only way to live was to be a concubine. * We often get the impression that Jesus is shaming the woman for her lifestyle, but it's more likely He was telling her that He understood her story and what she had done to survive. * Jesus told the woman at the well how to move past the past, find hope in the present, and how to step confidently into the future. It doesn’t matter how we got to the in-between – whether it's our fault or not. Jesus is ready to meet us there. * Talk to Jesus about things He already knows about. He’s a great listener and He wants to hear from us. It's His desire to affirm and commission us. * If you feel stuck in the in-between, start by being honest with Him about your situation. Drop whatever you're doing and go before you’re ready. And share your faith. You have everything you need.
Let’s Get Real Practical: Our thoughts affect our feelings and our feelings affect our actions. One reason we get stuck is that we have a negative core belief.
Take time to name one area where you feel stuck. Then, examine the thoughts you meditate on in that area.
Write down your negative thoughts. What feeling is associated with that thought? What behaviors result from that thought?
Now, challenge the negative thought and replace it with the truth from God’s word. What feeling is associated with that and what actions result?
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Today's episode is the last in my series leading up to Easter about 5 topics that will help us prepare our HEART -
Holy Spirit conviction
Embrace grace
Align your heart with His
Restore union
Thanksgiving
As we focus on thanking Jesus this Easter, I also want to discuss thanksgiving as a Biblical principle that helps our mental health. When we give thanks to God with a posture of gratitude, something shifts in our spirit. It lifts us out of despair.
I want to encourage you to make a gratitude list this week and to continue to add to it daily. You can even include your family and friends and see how many things you can all think of together.
"To all who mourn in Israel, he will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair. In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks that the LORD has planted for his own glory." Isaiah 61:3
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm chatting with author Jen Weaver. Jen is passionate about helping women know the love of Christ and engage in life with Him. She’s the author of "A Wife’s Secret to Happiness" and serves as Bible teacher, ministry coach, and contributing writer for various publications. Married to her best friend Jared, she’s a happy boy mom of two young sons and is most likely to be found with her hair full of dry shampoo and a coffee mug in-hand.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Jen's latest book "A Wife’s Secret to Happiness" is about seeing marriages as expressions of faith, but she faced her own marriage challenges through the writing process. God was faithful to bring her health and healing through the process and used it to equip her to write the book. * Lately, Jen has felt lead to help other believers walk in relationship with God and break free from religious traditions that are "responsible routines instead of a life-giving relationship with Him.” * Jen found herself doing things out of fear of how others would perceive her or to "be good" instead of being motivated by the love of God. She was held back because she listened to her own insecurities. When you’re self-critical, you assume others judge you harshly as well. It's more important to have genuine health than have fake health and be okay with not being healthy on the inside. * God is not afraid to wrestle with us, but we have to start asking questions and learning about who Jesus is for ourselves instead of relying on teachers to the Holy Spirit for us. He invites us and desires for us to know Him. * If you want to hear the voice of God, don't stay in the place of information, ask God what He wants to show you about Him as you read the Bible. Don't disqualify yourself - God wants to speak into your life. * Awareness of the spirit of religion can come from the perspective of who's doing the work. So often we choose to do things for God without inviting Him to be a part of it. We cannot achieve more of God's love with our actions. * Invite Him into the hard places. “God wants to wrestle with us so our beliefs become sincere in us.” Lean into the discomfort and let the Holy Spirit be your comforter.
Resources Mentioned: Jen's FREE Simplified Workbook to help you engage with God through Scripture
Let’s Get Real Practical: What area of your faith are you currently wrestling?
Have you talked to God about it?
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Connect with Jen: website | Instagram | Facebook
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Leading up to Easter, I'm doing a series about 5 topics that will help us prepare our HEART -
Holy Spirit conviction
Embrace grace
Align your heart with His
Restore union
Thanksgiving
Today's episode was inspired by the phrase from John Eldrige's book Get Your Life Back. In it, he writes about the act of taking a 1-minute pause to realign your heart with God to restore union with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
God's desire is to be in union with us all day, every day. I encourage you to download the Pause App and use it throughout your week as a reminder to be intentional about restoring union in your life.
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author Charlotte Gambill. Charlotte has an infectious love for life, a deep love for people, and zealous love for God’s House. Her passion is to build the local church across the earth, to see people reach their full potential, and to develop and strengthen leadership. Charlotte is known for her practical, humorous, and passionate application of God’s Word. Charlotte is an author, speaker, pastor, and mother, she leads Life Church in England with her husband Steve and together they have two children, Hope Cherish and Noah Brave.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Charlotte was inspired to write Today I Choose after her everyday choices became restricted because of the pandemic. Instead, she chose her confession, her attitude, and her actions. What started with her making videos on her phone became a gathering point for people all across the world to daily join in and together choose faith over fear, connection over isolation, and trust in the trials. * We are being fed by fear through the news and media, but we have the choice of how we respond to what we hear. We also have the power to make better choices about what information we allow in our lives. * Little, deliberate choices change the atmosphere of our homes. * The pandemic exposed that our online and shallow connections are not enough to sustain us. Connection won't just happen, we have to do the work of being open, vulnerable and committed. * Connections don't develop overnight. Invest in the people who are willing to walk with you. Assess where you are and where you're going and listen to the Holy Spirit's guidance. * Each friendship plays a role in the story of our lives. Sometimes releasing someone makes room for someone else to take that role in your life. * We may think we don’t have time for connection, but that person may be an answer to prayer for our time management. * Everyone is a leader, but your leadership doesn't show up until you decide to show up. Decide to led today.
Resources Mentioned: The Collective Mentorship Program: The Collective is the opportunity to choose your company, cultivate your conversation and deepen your commitment to gaining the wisdom you need for the road ahead.
Let's Get Real Practical: I have 2 questions and one action step for you today.
What area of your life feels heavy today?
What are you choosing to believe around that area?
Now, reframe your choices around the area you identified.
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Connect with Charlotte: website | Instagram | Facebook
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Leading up to Easter, I'm doing a series about 5 topics that will help us prepare our HEART -
Holy Spirit conviction
Embrace grace
Align your heart with His
Restore union
Thanksgiving
This week I’m focusing on aligning our hearts with His. When we can do that and pray from a position that's in line with God's will, we will see doors bust open. It just takes a simple prayer.
Here are 2 simple ways to align your heart with His:
- Get in the Word
It reads you while you read it. If you're looking for somewhere to start, I suggest Hebrews 4.
- Submit your heart
Start your day by saying, "Father, I yield to you as my shepherd today." God is not as concerned with the words you're saying as He is with our heart posture.
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm talking with Christy Wright about her new book Living True: 40 Days to Get Back to You. Christy Wright is a #1 national best-selling author, personal development expert, and host of The Christy Wright Show. She’s been featured on Today Show and Fox News and in Entrepreneur and Woman’s Day Magazines. Since 2009, Christy has served at Ramsey Solutions, where she teaches on personal development, business, and faith.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Christy started writing books and doing events and moving into the online space was a natural way to market her brand. What you're seeing now is the online evolution of the brand in response to the market and where God is leading her. * The Christy Wright Show was created from her call to build a bridge between the faith world and the personal development world. * We often depend on God to show up or we put it on ourselves and take God out of the equation. It’s not either/or, it’s a both. We are called to be good stewards. * Christy's new devotional Living True: 40 Days to Get Back to You was inspired after hearing from women some version of “I feel like I’ve lost myself. I don’t know who I am anymore.” And she felt it herself – lost in seasons of life. * "Your season is where you are, not who you are.” * If you feel lost because you've never known your true self, look to the One who created you. If you start with the foundation of who you are from God's Word, then you can complement that with personality tests and input from the people who know you best. * “When you try to figure out who you are apart from God, you’ll always have a fragmented picture; you will never have a full picture.”
4 Things You Need to Know to Get Back to Yourself: * Who God is - Living True: 40 Days to Get Back to You breaks down simple concepts – God is good, faithful, on time, all-knowing, all-powerful, etc. When you get to know God’s character, it’s easier to identify him in life. Who He is never changes with the seasons. * Who you are - the truth of what God says about you and your value that can combat the false narratives we build about our identities. * Where you are - The truth about our seasons of life is that it affects our experience of reality. We have the tendency to draw conclusions about our identity based on the season we're in. Separating yourself from your season gives you the strength and grace you need to get through it and a healthier view of yourself. It also gives you permission to be fully present in the season you’re in. * Where you're going - we need to challenge the feelings and sentiments that we adopt as adults as practical, logical (I'm not going to get my hopes up, etc.). That is not in line with scripture. God never asks us to be more practical. He calls us to have big faith. He’s the God of hope. His plans for us are good.
Let's Get Real Practical: Reflect on these questions this week -
What season are you in now?
What lies have you believed in this season? What truth does God want to show you about the season you’re in today?
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Leading up to Easter, I'm doing a series about 5 topics that will help us prepare our HEART -
Holy Spirit conviction
Embrace grace
Align your heart with His
Restore union
Thanksgiving
This week I’m focusing on embracing grace. We could sum up the Bible in the phrase “God’s grace.” “Grace” is God’s favor to humans through Jesus. He purchased our freedom with the blood of His Son and forgave our sins, we just have to choose to receive it.
Have you received grace through the gift of salvation?
Do you receive it daily for the forgiveness of your sins?
"In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth in Christ as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth.
In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will."
Ephesians 1:7-11
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm speaking with Karen Ehman about her new book Make Their Day: 101 Simple, Powerful Ways to Love Others Well. Karen is a New York Times bestselling author, speaker with Proverbs 31 Ministries, and a writer for Encouragement for Today, an online devotional that reaches over four million women daily. She has authored 15 books and has been featured on numerous media outlets including FoxNews.com, TODAY Parenting, Redbook.com, Crosswalk.com, and HomeLife Magazine.
Key points from our conversation: * The inspiration for Karen's latest book came from her mom who was always looking for practical, inexpensive ways to bless others. * The book is broken into 8 categories such as family, friends, co-workers, strangers, etc. so you can start reading anywhere. It also has recipe cards, gift tags, and certificates in the back that can be used for many of the ideas in the book. * If you're feeling discouraged about your life, get your eyes off yourself and serve others in need. * When we get caught up in comparing our lives to others, we begin to come apart at the seems - "Their kids 'seem' so perfect!" or "They 'seem' to have the perfect marriage."
Ideas to make someone else's day: For friends - throw a favorite things party. Find something affordable that you love ($5 or $10) and buy a few of them (depending on how much you want to spend) for friends. At the party, each person will talk about the item they love, then pull names and give away their items to those friends. Make a playlist or a phone lock screen to brighten their day. Write them an old-fashioned handwritten letter.
For husbands - make a poster board card love letter with candy in place of the words. "I love you to (Reese's) Pieces!" "You're such a SweetTart!"
For strangers - look for necessary people in your life like mailmen, teachers, nail techs, clerks and give them a gift card, baked goodies, or just a kind word for their hard work. At the store, ask for a manager and let them know what a great job their employee is doing.
For teachers - write them a note (or have your child write it) and give them a gift card or just tell them thank you on a random day
Let's get real practical: Here are two prompts to take action on today: ask God to highlight a stranger that you can give a sincere compliment to and be intentional in showing love to one of your friends or family members.
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When I asked God what He wanted me to share for today's Talk Therapy, He laid on my heart this phrase, "Prepare your hearts for my Son.”
Leading up to Easter, I'm going to be doing a series about 5 topics that will help us prepare our HEART -
Holy Spirit conviction
Embrace grace
Align your heart with His
Restore union
Thanksgiving
This week I'm sharing about what it looks like to be convicted by the Holy Spirit and why it's necessary for us to listen and obey. If there's something you feel would be good for you to do or say, but you really don't want to hear about it, it's likely the Holy Spirit prompting you.
God loves us too much to let us stay stuck in our sin. What is He gently nudging you about today?
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm excited to talk with Dr. Caroline Leaf about her new book Cleaning Up Your Mental Mess. She is a communication pathologist and cognitive neuroscientist with a Masters and Ph.D. in Communication Pathology and a BSc Logopaedics, specializing in cognitive and metacognitive neuropsychology. Since the early 1980s, she has researched the mind-brain connection, the nature of mental health, and the formation of memory. She was one of the first in her field to study how the brain can change (neuroplasticity) with directed mind input. Dr. Leaf is also the bestselling author of Switch on Your Brain, Think Learn Succeed, Think and Eat Yourself Smart, and many more. She teaches at academic, medical, and neuroscience conferences, churches, and to various audiences around the world. Dr. Leaf is also involved in the global ECHO movement, which trains physicians worldwide on the mind-brain-body connection, mental health, and how to avoid physician burnout.
Dr. Leaf is currently conducting clinical trials using the 5-step program she developed while in private practice to further demonstrate the effectiveness of mind-directed techniques to help relieve mental ill-health problems such as anxiety, depression, and intrusive thoughts. The primary aim of these trials is to make mental health care more affordable, applicable, and accessible worldwide, and to reduce the stigma around mental health.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * The benefit we get from exercise is determined by our mind. * The book was inspired by the research Dr. Leaf did to determine out what can actually change when we renew our minds, as well as how that impacts the brain, body, and how we function in life. * Mind and brain are separate. Your brain is physical; your mind is your thinking, feeling, and choosing. Your mind produces thoughts in your brain. * A neurocycle helps allow you to track thoughts and behaviors. * Once we connect with wisdom, we can better observe our behavior then analyze it. * Like a tree has branches, thoughts have memories. * If you want to find the root, look for warning signals like frustration, irritation, depression, anger. Don’t push them aside – inspect them. Suppressing warning signals causes physical damage to the brain. * Analyze your physical symptoms like stomach problems, tension, and rushing adrenaline. Also, check behaviors like non-verbal communication. * Mental health is not a disease. The label is leading is mismanagement of health. Misery has become medicalized and treatment is typically symptom-focused, which is great for the body, but not the mind. * The quick-fix mentality of symptom treatment has led to suppression. * We are wired for love. Negative thoughts physically vibrate incorrectly in the brain and cause inflammation that affects the immune system and how we function. * Jesus modeled pushing through and digging into the difficult. There is not a quick fix. The only way out is through. Embrace, process, and reconceptualize. * Don’t be scared of depression and anxiety. Instead, see them as helpful messengers. * Renewing your mind is a lifestyle. * Switch - 21 Day Brain Detox App
Dr. Leaf's 5 Steps to Reduce Anxiety, Stress, and Toxic Thinking:
- Gather awareness - become aware of emotional and physical warning signals
- Reflect - ask, answer, and discuss. Get to the core.
- Write it down. It helps you get into the depths of why you think this, what you’re doing, and how you feel.
- Recheck
- Activate mental reach - bringing order out of the chaos
Let's Get Real Practical: Let's get practical by addressing one area of your life that you know God is calling you to take your thoughts captive.
Action steps for this week: Identify what area of your life in which you feel stuck. Ask if your thinking in that area is toxic. Then write down the thought and replace it with the truth.
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This week as I was feeling anxious, I began to analyze myself when God interrupted my thought process and reminded me to pray. Anxiety, worry, and fear are not from God. Whenever those things pop up, we can use them as reminders that we must make it a daily habit to cast our cares upon God. Casting requires action, but it also lightens our load and does something to fix the problem.
What is God asking you to cast on him today?
1 Peter 5:7, "Cast all your anxieties on the Him because He cares for you."
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm chatting with my friend Lisa Corley about how we can better understand the gift of prophecy. Lisa Corley is a wife and mother of three boys. She has been an active member of Gateway Church for 18 years. She has lead small groups and is involved in the prophetic ministry. Lisa has taught on parenting, understanding prophetic ministry, and living a Spirit-filled life in women’s groups. She loves the prophetic aspect of the Christian walk. Her gentle loving perspective comes with sensitivity to the Holy Spirit that enables her prophetic words to be edifying, confirming, and comforting to those who receive them.
Key Points from Our Conversation: * Prophecy is a word that brings exhortation, comfort, and edification. * In everyday life, if something comes to your mind that fits into the prophecy categories, speak it. The more you practice, the more confident you'll grow in your gift. * We often stop ourselves from speaking prophecy because we're too distracted, too embarrassed, or don't feel we have the right words. Keep it simple. People are looking for compassion. * Prophecy is a gift of the Holy Spirit to help others feel the Holy Spirit in their own lives. * You don't have to have a platform or title to speak words of edification. You can use that gift for the people in your own home. * You don't have to be anointed to prophesy, but you can intentionally sharpen your gift by attending classes, reading books, and practicing with accountability. * Remain humble in your gift of prophecy. * God is not looking for perfection, He's looking for a willing vessel. * "We are each are our own expression of the Holy Spirit." * Take the time to dig deep and ask God what He's trying to show us in the midst of all our challenges. Don't miss the opportunity to connect with God and hear His voice for yourself. * If you create the space for God to move in your life, He will absolutely speak to you. * Resources mentioned: Ep. 103: The Secret to Success with Tom Lane; He Still Speaks
Let's Get Real Practical: Here are 2 things to ask God this week:
Are there any lies I've believed in the area of hearing Your voice?
What's a word of encouragement I can share with someone today?
Episode Sponsor: Daily Kairos – get 20% off when you visit rachaelgilbert.com/dailykairos and use the promo code REALTALK20 at checkout!
Connect with Lisa: Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
We all have coping strategies, but are they healthy?
When life throws the unexpected at you, it's natural to seek to numb the pain through coping. Maybe you run to online shopping, alcohol, or binge eating. But God's desire is for us to soothe in a way that draws us closer to Him. That can look like praying or reading the Bible or even going for a walk or listening to upbeat, positive music.
This week, I encourage you to write out a coping list. Be honest about your good and bad strategies, cross out anything that pulls you away from God, and circle anything you can use. Be mindful to think of strategies that don't involve others. Then share your list with someone you trust.
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm talking with Tom Lane, Dallas campus pastor at Gateway Church about his book Tested and Approved: 21 Lessons for Life and Ministry. Tom Lane graduated with a bachelor’s degree in accounting and business administration from the University of Nebraska at Omaha. Prior to Gateway, he was in pastoral ministry at Trinity Fellowship for 27 years where he held a variety of positions, and prior to that, he worked in corporate settings in Omaha, Oklahoma City, and Amarillo. Tom joined the staff of Gateway in January 2004 as executive senior pastor. In 2015, his church oversight responsibilities moved to his son Todd, and Tom prepared to oversee the newly formed Gateway Apostolic Ministry. In September 2015, he also accepted the role of campus pastor to lead the launch of our Dallas Campus in March 2016.
Today, Tom serves as the lead executive senior pastor of Apostolic Ministry and is the campus pastor of our Dallas Campus along with serving as an elder of Gateway Church. Under Pastor Robert’s leadership, and along with Pastor Jimmy Evans, he leads in executing Gateway’s vision and developing strategies locally, nationally, and internationally, which impacts and influences the Church. As one of the elders, he also helps provide spiritual and fiduciary governance for Gateway’s ministries.
Key points from today's conversation: * “Neither ministry nor life is fair and when you focus on fairness, neither one will ever make sense to you. Life must be based on faith no matter what you do.” * It's natural to want justice, but it's more important to surrender to God's will. He sets our days, so there's no need to compare yourself to others. * God is the secret to success. Every blessing, provision, and good thing comes from Him. Take each decision to Him and trust Him when He closes doors. His plans are to prosper you. * Success means to fulfill the full measure of God’s plan for our life. It's a process that activates our faith. * Hear, believe, and obey. You have to be willing to obey when you don’t have the assurance of the outcome. God will give you enough, but at some point, you’ll have to leap and trust Him to catch you. * Prophetic ministry is not for the elite, it’s for everyone. It's a demonstration of God inserting himself in your life through others. People need to know that God is real, alive, and active in our lives. * Resources mentioned - He Still Speaks; The God I Never Knew, Tested and Approved Mentor Playbook
Let's get real practical: I have 2 simple action steps for you from this episode. First, write or think about your definition of success. Second, ask God if that lines up with His definition of success for you.
Episode sponsor: Download the 3 Action Steps to Overcome Fear & Pursue your God-Given Dreams FREE training today!
Connect with Tom: website | Twitter | youtube
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Welcome to Real Talk with Rachael. Today, you are listening to talk therapy, a short segment of the show that releases at the beginning of the week to allow space for God to move in our hearts and speak into our lives.
Last week I released an episode on why we need to process things. This week I am tackling the topic of jealousy. You can check out a blog I wrote previously about 3 problems with jealousy and 10 verses to overcome it here.
I don’t know a person who has never dealt with jealousy. In fact, most of us think it’s cute to say “Oh my goodness I am so jealous of your shoes…where did you get them?”.
However, God showed me 3 problems with jealousy that when left unresolved will wreak havoc in our life:
- Jealousy is “me” minder rather than “kingdom” minded.
- Jealousy robs us of our joy and blessings.
- Jealousy keeps us from entering into intimate relationships with those with whom we are jealous.
NEW INSIGHT: we can rebuke a jealous spirit! It’s not from God and we do not have to receive it.
Verses to meditate:
- Then I observed all the work and ambition motivated by envy. What a waste! Smoke. And spitting into the wind. (Ecclesiastes 4:4)
- Make a careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given, and then sink yourself into that. Don’t be impressed with yourself. Don’t compare yourself to others. Each of you must take responsibility for doing the best you can with your own life. (Galatians 6:4-5)
- Surely resentment destroys the fool, and jealousy kills the simple. (Job 5:2)
- A peaceful heart leads to a healthy body; jealousy is like cancer in the bones. (Proverbs 14:30)
- Anger is cruel, and wrath is like a flood, but jealousy is even more dangerous. (Proverbs 27:4)
Be sure to download this resource I have created that is FREE to download for a limited time only. It is a Biblical Body Image coloring book! To download it, head to rachaelgilbert.com/biblicalbodyimage.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm chatting with author and national speaker, Katy McCown. Katy is president of She Laughs Ministries, a writer for Proverbs 31 Ministries, and a national speaker. Through all life’s uncertainties and surprises, she has learned some things about “living sure” even when the future is not. She and her husband, Luke, a former NFL quarterback, are raising six children on their ranch in Texas.
Key points from today's conversation: * Katy wrote her book after becoming so smothered with "what-ifs" that she was losing the present. "I can't change the future, but the fear of the future can change me." * Before she prioritized time with Jesus, her day flowed from burden and fear rather than the truth of who God is. * Take time to be still and quiet with Jesus - no reading, no moving. Turn on a worship song and meditate on who He is. It won't be natural. Keep doing it. "When we truly become quiet before of the Lord, we can receive from Him in a way we can't when we’re just fitting Him in or distracted." * The fear doesn't go away. There is always something to be scared of. Admit to God how you feel. * Start your prayer with praise. When we begin with the truth of who God is, then we can filter our circumstances through that truth. Praising first changes our perspective. When we do it the other way, we tend to see God filtered through our circumstances. * You won't be able to smile through every circumstance. Sometimes it takes moment by moment surrender. But when your gaze is on Jesus, you will smile at His goodness. It's a quiet joy and a steadiness. * 7 Prayers to Help You Smile without Fear
5 Steps to Trade Fear of the Future for Purpose in the Present 1. Spend less time doing and more time being with Jesus 2. Exchange the fear of the future for the fear of the Lord 3. Rely on my savior instead of myself 4. Pursue love 5. Live faithfully today
Let's Get Real Practical: Download my 3 Actions Steps to Overcome Fear & Pursue Your God-Given Dreams training and practice one of the following actions steps this week:
Write it out
Walk it out
Go to war
Connect with Katy: website | podcast | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
In this episode of Talk Therapy, I'm discussing what it means to process and why we need to do it. Even if you haven't experienced major trauma in your life, smaller traumas compound, but we often resist the discomfort that comes with processing. The fact is that you can process that trauma or it will process you.
What are you afraid of processing? What do you think it’ll look like to process things?
The action step for this episode is to think about something simple that upset you this week and process it. And if you're not already, seek professional help to process traumas.
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
In this episode of Real Talk with Rachael, I'm talking with Arden Bevere about his new book Redefined. Arden is the youngest son of John and Lisa Bevere and the cofounder of Sons & Daughters, a movement committed to raising up a generation of uncompromising followers of Christ who will transform our world. He has traveled the world doing ministry and speaking at conferences and has a passion to see his generation go further than any that came before it, fully alive in this God-adventure.
Key points from today's conversation: * Arden wrote Redefined to combat the negative labels the younger generation has accepted as truth about themselves and share the truth of what God's Word has to say about his people. “God does not label His people in the Word of God. A label speaks to who were in the past or who we are now. That’s what the world does because they’re limited to time.” * If we live under labels we are we are missing out on the power and authority we have through Christ. * This generation does not a lack of Christians, but a lack of Christians who have stepped into the fullness of what that actually means to be sons and daughters of God. We have a generation that has not received transformation knowledge that comes from the Word of God. * What the enemy is labeling you is often the area God wants to use you to show His goodness and grace. * There is a unique expression of God inside of each of us and the world is waiting for it to be seen. Don't fall into the trap of comparison. You were designed to be your unique and authentic self. * Lean into your uniqueness and don’t see it as a weakness. God wants to use you in extraordinary and unexpected ways. * “We want to be warriors without war.” When we focus on God, we’re able to use past addictions as tools instead of a hindrance. * Our generation has missed out on the fear of the Lord. It’s a deeper level of intimacy with the Lord. It’s not fear of Him, it’s fear of being away from Him. * “The fear of God allows you to live fearlessly.”
Let's Get Real Practical: When we're searching for our identity, we shouldn't consult our labels, we should consult the Lord.
Here are 2 real practical action steps you can take this week:
- Identify one negative label in your life and remove it
- Ask God what positive word He wants to replace that label with
Connect with Arden: website | Instagram | Facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
Last week I released an episode on the first "before and after" in the Bible. As I started this conversation on beauty I realize I am ruffling feathers or as some would say, stepping on toes. Actually, it is not I who is doing the ruffling but the holy spirit. Before we keep having these hard conversations I wanted to address why I feel called to bring up hard things.
If you listen to our Wednesday interviews, which I hope you do as we have the most amazing guests every week, you might have noticed I started saying a simple statement:
God brings things up because they are on the way out.
Let's talk about 4 things to know when God brings things up:
- God brings things up because he loves us too much to let them poison us. (ex: eating bad food it must be thrown up)
For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. Hebrews 4:12
- The coming up process is uncomfortable. Most people would rather sit in the pain they know than sit in the discomfort of the bringing up.
- It’s on its way out! That’s good news.
- Seek wise counsel. Get into a community. Don’t do it alone.
Be sure to download this resource I have created that is FREE to download for a limited time only. It is a Biblical Body Image coloring book! To download it, head to Biblical Body Image Coloring Book
In this episode of Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with my friend, Kat Lee who is passionate about teaching others how to jumpstart each day with a grace-filled, life-giving morning routine. She is a writer, speaker, podcaster, and founder of HelloMornings.org. She and her husband, Jimmy, live in Waco, Texas with their three children.
Key points from today's conversation: * Kat originally started her morning routines with the attitude that if it's worth doing, it's worth doing poorly. * God time, plan time, and move time all serve the same purpose – to bring God glory and bring others to Him. * When we focus on God's purpose for our lives, it changes not only the way we think about planning and fitness but the importance of them. * We often overlook our time with God because we think of it as something to mark off a to-do list than a time to connect. * “So often we wait for it to be perfect later in the day that we don’t just make that initial connection in the morning that can lead to so much more.” * “Guilt is only an indication, not an identity.” Guilt should always be followed by grace. * "Look at your morning routine as a path you’re choosing to be on instead of a goal to accomplish." * “It’s never about when we start a day, it’s about how we start a day.” * Use your guilt as a prompt. The moment you think you blew it is the exact moment you need to spend time with God. * Hold everything loosely and keep asking God what He wants for you. It's not about perfection, it about progress.
Resources: Bible Memory app
Verses app
3 Minute Morning Starter Kit
Praying for Your Family Calendar
Let's Get Real Practical: 8 Ways to Build a Habit:
- Differentiate between goals and habits
- Start with small changes
- Update your environment
- Tie new habits to other activities
- Some practice is better than no practice
- Tell someone you’re starting a new habit
- Track your habit
- Celebrate your successes
This week, ask God what habits He wants you to build, then pick ONE of the steps above to implement in your routine.
Episode Sponsor: Daily Kairos - get 20% off when you visit rachaelgilbet.com/dailykairos and use the promo code REALTALK20 at checkout!
Connect with Kat: podcast | website | Instagram | facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
Last week I released an episode called "The Beauty Battle." I started the conversation about where this battle for beauty began and I challenged us to examine our hearts for any beauty idols. This week I am continuing that conversation about beauty.
As I was scrolling through social media, I was noticing there were a lot of before and after photos. These photos are inspiring as we see the transformation that takes place when individuals commit to a program and they get incredible changes in their body and health. I once did a diet program with my sister in college and let’s just say we only took before photos because at the end of that challenge I actually gained 8 pounds. While I joke about this topic I want us to look a the very first mention of before and after in the Bible.
While there wasn’t a photo flashed for Eve to be inspired by, satan painted a before and after scenario for Eve. Satan started by painting Eve’s bleak, lame before picture. You know, the one with no makeup and hair a mess? Then he painted the after of when she ate from the tree. This after was so breathtaking it inspired Eve to action.
What before and after scenario is the enemy, or your own inner critic, painting for you? Have you believed that if only you could get to the after, then all would be well?
My friend, I am here to tell you that where you are now is enough. Yes, get healthy and take care of your body. But you do not need to get cleaned up physically in order for God to meet with you. He loves you right where you are. In fact, that journey to health becomes a lot more fun when God is walking alongside you every step of the way. Invite him in today.
Be sure to download this resource I have created that is FREE to download for a limited time only. It is a Biblical Body Image coloring book!
To download it, head to Biblical Body Image Coloring Book
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I’m talking with Amy Ford, the author of Help Her Be Brave: Discover Your Place in the Pro-Life Movement. She’s also the President and Co-Founder of Embrace Grace, a non-profit that inspires and equips the church to love single and pregnant young women by working with almost 700 churches across the nation, providing curriculum to help moms with unexpected pregnancies.
Key points from our conversation: * There's a misconception that pro-life work just means picketing. There are many ways to get involved and Amy's book Help Her Be Brave: Discover Your Place in the Pro-Life Movement can help you find a way to get involved that uses your strengths. * 1 in 4 women have experienced an abortion - the rate is the same inside the church as it is outside. * Abortion healing is possible. Jesus' blood offers complete forgiveness and He still wants to use you. Too many voices in the church are being silenced in shame. * "Heart work can be hard work." * Fear is at the root of every abortion decision. Working through the trauma of abortion gives freedom and freedom saves lives. * Life is something to be celebrated, no matter how it arrives in the world. If a woman is being brave enough to keep the baby and show up, she should be embraced by the church. * “Vulnerability is what squashes shame.” * Grace changes people. * You can be a safe space for pregnant women with supportive consistency and offering help. Celebrate them. Take them to a pregnancy center to get resources. * If a woman opens up about experiencing an abortion, be loving and listen. Connect them with an abortion healing group.
Let’s get real practical: If we're honest, there's some shame in all of our lives that's likely holding us back. If you having a hard time identifying where your shame comes from, try creating a shame timeline and ask God to highlight something that He wants to release you from. Once you've identified it, release the shame. It's not from God. Then, relay the shame to someone else that you trust. God wants to use you to bring freedom to those around you.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Amy: website | Instagram | facebook
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
Recently God has drawn me to dive into how He defines beauty, and as I've studied the Bible, it turns out the first mention just chapters into Genesis.
In this talk therapy, I'm discussing where the battle for beauty began and challenging you (and myself) to examine beauty strongholds and evaluate if they've become idols. We were never designed to be hyperaware of our bodies.
If this is something you struggle with, take a moment to say this simple prayer, "God, help my inward beauty far outweigh my outer beauty. May my true beauty shine through so that it's You in me that makes me beautiful."
Resource: Biblical Body Image Coloring Book
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with international minister and best-selling author, John Bevere. He and his wife, Lisa, are the founders of Messenger International--a ministry committed to developing uncompromising followers of Christ who transform our world. John's heart to strengthen the local church has led to over 40 million translated resources being given to pastors and leaders in developing nations. When he's home in Colorado, you can find John playing card games with his family or trying to convince Lisa to take up golf.
We're talking about:
- Everyone has been given unique gifts to fulfill the calling on their life. Your goal should be to identify your gifts, develop them, then multiply them.
- There’s not a separation between secular and sacred ministries.
- The anointing is the enhancer of our gifts. We may be very gifted, but without anointing, we can’t move people at their core. It’s the difference between natural impact and eternal impact.
- God anticipates that we multiply our giftings. Over 50% of Christians don’t know they’re supernaturally gifted. If they do, they think it’s automatic.
- "In serving God, there is always a testing period before we are anointed or appointed."
- We need to study the word to understand the inner workings of the body of Christ. The parts of the body that are unseen are more valuable than the parts that are seen and the entire body must work together.
- God equates faithfulness with multiplication and laziness with maintenance. He doesn't micromanage us, He has made us stewards of our gifts.
- We multiply our gifts when we ask God every day what He would have us do.
Let's get real practical:
This week's exercise is included in my Intentional Influencer workbook.
Ask yourself what gifts, passions, and talents you possess and look for threads. Don't forget to tag me on Instagram so I can see what you learned!
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with John on his website, Instagram or Facebook
Connect with Rachael on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
I had a topic prepared for today's talk therapy when God stopped me in my tracks and asked me to pivot to these 3 words - "take your place."
I don't know about you, but I've been in a season of getting pushed around spiritually, and honestly, I'm sick of sitting by watching the enemy mess with us. He has no authority over us. It's time to take our place and use the weapons that God has given us - truth, righteousness, and peace.
"Stand your ground, putting on the belt of truth and the body armor of God’s righteousness. For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News so that you will be fully prepared. In addition to all of these, hold up the shield of faith to stop the fiery arrows of the devil. Put on salvation as your helmet, and take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere."
Ephesians 6:14-18
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with Jon and Kathryn Gordon about their new book Relationship Grit: A True Story with Lessons to Stay Together, Grow Together, and Thrive Together. Jon Gordon's best-selling books and talks have inspired readers and audiences around the world. His principles have been put to the test by numerous Fortune 500 companies, professional and college sports teams, school districts, hospitals, and non-profits. He is the author of 22 books including 9 best-sellers: The Energy Bus, The Carpenter, Training Camp, You Win in the Locker Room First, The Power of Positive Leadership, The Power of a Positive Team, The Coffee Bean, Stay Positive, and his latest The Garden. Jon and his tips have been featured on The Today Show, CNN, CNBC, The Golf Channel, Fox and Friends, and in numerous magazines and newspapers. His clients include The Los Angeles Dodgers, The Atlanta Falcons, Campbell Soup, Dell, Publix, Southwest Airlines, LA Clippers, Miami Heat, Pittsburgh Pirates, BB&T Bank, Clemson Football, Northwestern Mutual, Bayer, West Point Academy, and more. Jon is a graduate of Cornell University and holds a Masters in Teaching from Emory University. He and his training/consulting company are passionate about developing positive leaders, organizations, and teams.
We're talking about: * G.R.I.T. - God, Resolve, Invest, Together * The story of how God resorted their relationship after infidelity through Jon's willingness to change, remorse, and prayer. * If you don’t heal now, you’ll have to heal in your new relationship. * If you don’t confess, you can’t address. * What you cover, God will uncover. And when you uncover it, God will uncover it with his grace. * Identify your wounds and work on healing them. Your mind doesn’t need fixing, your soul needs healing. * We like change, we just don’t like transition. * Invest in the root and you’ll get the fruit. * Advice for 2021 - Identify a word for the year and check-in with your family often to discuss growth. * The key to winning the year or making it through difficult times is to win the day.
Let's Get Real Practical: Since today's episode focused on relationships, my tip for this week focuses on Building a Love Map - Dr. Gottman’s term for getting to know your partner’s world.
Text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Jon on his website, Instagram or Facebook
Connect with Rachael on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
For the month of December, we have spent every Monday morning in a series called “Process & Pray through 2020”. Last week we processed our health and this week we will process change, or as I like to call it, a forced pivot.
DISCLAIMER: THIS DOES NOT REPLACE YOUR THERAPY APPOINTMENTS. USE THIS TIME TO SEE IF GOD REVEALS ANYTHING YOU NEED TO SEEK HELP TO PROCESS FURTHER WITH A LICENSED PROFESSIONAL.
I think one thing we ALL have in common this year is that we were forced to make changes in many areas of our lives. From homeschool to work Zoom calls, we all had to pivot in how we operated in life. For some, this change came with ease, and for others, it was resisted. The biggest lesson I learned is that change in life is inevitable.
Ecclesiastes 3 says, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven; a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.”
Seasons will come and go and there is nothing we can do about it. But we can decide what kind of attitude we will have as the seasons change. As believers, we need to lead the way in having a positive attitude in all seasons and circumstances. But it is totally normal and OK to grieve the change in seasons. Let’s do that today in the quiet of our own homes so when we go out to the world our face shines the light of Jesus.
Process these questions throughout the week in a journal:
- What areas of change did I encounter in 2020?
- Did I embrace or reject the change?
- What was lost because of the change? Did I grieve the loss?
- What was gained in the change? Did I celebrate?
- What word is God giving me for 2021?
Don't forget to check out my 3 Action Steps to Overcome Fear and Confidently Pursue Your God-Given Dreams training!
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
In case you don’t know, my husband and I own The Back & Body Clinic in Lewisville, Texas where we serve our patients with an integrated, team approach that listens to your healthcare needs. Our family is called to serve in this area of health, and we feel passionate about incorporating evidence-based practices with God’s word and his promises of healing.
Let’s chat for a moment about the health issues that arose in 2020. Many of you listening have either had COVID or, may live in fear of getting it. COVID itself brought other health complications even without catching the virus, like high blood pressure, increased stress, depression, anxiety, and other outside of norm health concerns.
Today, I am not teaching on health, but I do feel lead to stand in the gap for your health.
Process these questions throughout the week in a journal. You can find the questions in the show notes or at rachaelgilbert.com under the podcast tab.
- What areas of my health suffered in 2020?
- What fear do I hold about my current health?
- What areas of health do I need to put under the blood of Jesus Christ?
- What does God’s word say about my health?
"But I will restore you to health and heal your wounds,’ declares the LORD." - Jeremiah 30:17
Resources: Stay tuned for a podcast from backbodyclinic.com next year!
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
For the month of December, we will spend every Monday morning in a series called “Process & Pray through 2020”. Last week we processed disappointments and this week we will process emotions.
I’m not going to teach on emotions this week but if you want to learn more about emotions, I encourage you to listen to the series we did on how to identify emotions earlier this year.
DISCLAIMER: THIS DOES NOT REPLACE YOUR THERAPY APPOINTMENTS. USE THIS TIME TO SEE IF GOD REVEALS ANYTHING YOU NEED TO SEEK HELP TO PROCESS FURTHER WITH A LICENSED PROFESSIONAL.
Process these questions throughout the week in a journal. You can find the questions in the show notes or at rachaelgilbert.com under the podcast tab.
- What unexpected emotions did I encounter in 2020?
- What was at the root of those emotions?
- What narrative have I associated with those emotions?
- God, I thank you for my emotions that let me know when I am not OK. Help me process them well.
Resources: The Emotionally Healthy Woman & the Emotion Wheel
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
For the month of December, we will spend every Monday morning in a series called “Process & Pray Through 2020”. Each week the focus will be different, but the theme of processing and praying will remain the same. I asked the Lord to show me 4 areas he wants us to process before we move into 2021 and those areas include disappointments, unexpected emotions, health (mental & physical), and change/forced pivot.
DISCLAIMER: THIS DOES NOT REPLACE YOUR THERAPY APPOINTMENTS. USE THIS TIME TO SEE IF GOD REVEALS ANYTHING YOU NEED TO SEEK HELP TO PROCESS FURTHER WITH A LICENSED PROFESSIONAL.
Today we are going to process disappointments.
Process these questions throughout the week in a journal. You can find the questions in the show notes or at rachaelgilbert.com under the podcast tab.
- What disappointments did I experience in 2020?
- What was lost in 2020?
- Have I addressed that loss or numbed the pain with passive activities like eating, shopping, social media, or other avoidant activities?
- God, what do you want to redeem that was stolen in 2020?
Don't forget to check out my 7 Days of Prayer for Your Business resource!
Connect with Rachael: website | Instagram | Facebook
This week’s Talk Therapy is the second in a two-part series about confrontation. In part one I discussed why the art of confrontation is necessary. You can listen here.
In this episode, I’m sharing traits of a healthy confrontation vs. an unhealthy one and offer 5 practical tips for engaging in carefrontation. We cannot control how others will respond to confrontation, but we can approach it with a humble spirit and a healthy end goal. “When you recognize that you need to do something and you’re brave enough to actually do it, the Holy Spirit will be with you.”
You can read the full show notes for this episode at RachaelGilbert.com!
Connect with Rachael on her website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with two-time Grammy-nominated singer, songwriter, and actress Jamie Grace about her mental health journey and her new book, Finding Quiet. Diagnosed with Tourette Syndrome, OCD, ADHD, and anxiety at a young age, Jamie actively advocates for joy, wellness, and mental health through the lens of music, film, and faith. An entertainer at heart, she regularly creates fresh content, including new music and weekly videos and episodes of The Jamie Grace Podcast. When she isn't touring, Jamie lives in Southern California with her husband, Aaron, and daughter, Isabella Brave.
We're talking about:
- Jamie's book Finding Quiet started as a journal through her early adulthood dealing with mental health issues and being in the spotlight.
- If you find yourself overwhelmed, tell someone and get the support you need. Be clear about your needs and intentional with the follow-through without feeling guilt or shame.
- Jamie grew up in the church and asked for a miracle healing, but God's will is for her is to let Him use her where she is and trust that He will bring healing in due time.
- Mental health problems are not due to a lack of faith.
- One of the most helpful things for Jamie is having an accountability circle that regularly asks her what they can do to help.
- You can start to discover your needs by noticing when things are going well and analyzing why. See what's working. It can be as simple and practical as going outside for 5 minutes or drinking a glass of water.
- Changing your perspective by finding things to be thankful for can bring joy in the midst of pain. "We have to learn how to allow pain and joy to co-exist."
- Acknowledging and accepting that some people won't want to be your friend and focusing on the people around you who do.
- "Finding quiet is not about taking all the noise away, it’s about learning how to have peace in the midst of it."
Text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Jamie on her website, Instagram, or Facebook.
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This week’s Talk Therapy is the first in a two-part series about confrontation. Or, as I like to call it, “carefrontation.” Whether you're a person who avoids it at all costs or someone who seeks it out, confrontation is necessary for healthy relationships. And when done well, it can be enlightening, empowering, and relationally connecting.
When we fail to practice carefrontation we are building a wall between each other. Take time this week to evaluate your current relationships and ask God if there's anyone or anything that you need to address.
Ephesians 4:15, "Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ."
Don't forget to check out my 6 Communication Skills Guide!
Connect with Rachael on her website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with Enneagram expert Ian Morgan Cron about the mental health aspect of the Enneagram. Ian is a bestselling author, psychotherapist, Enneagram teacher, and host of the popular podcast, Typology. His national bestseller, The Road Back to You: An Enneagram Journey to Self-Discovery, is used around the world as people seek to better understand who they are. He and his wife, Anne, have three children and live in Nashville, Tennessee.
We're talking about: * The origins of the Enneagram and what attracted Ian to it * The Enneagram doesn't put you in a box, it helps you understand the box you're already in and how to get out of it. * You shouldn't start assessing your child's Enneagram number until late adolescence or when they become interested in learning about it for themselves. * Everyone has two wings, but one wing is more dominant. * Your Enneagram number doesn't change, but you can operate as other numbers in different situations. * Your self-awareness affects your mental health and ability to succeed. * The Enneagram brings awareness to the unconscious motivation that has been tripping you up, giving you the freedom to make different choices. * “Information is not transformation.” * Don’t box yourself into your number and don’t use it as an excuse for poor behavior. * “You have a personality, but you are not your personality. Your identity is in Christ.”
Don't forget to take the IEQ9 test and check out Ian's new course True You: a Deeper Exploration of Your Enneagram Type!
Enneagram types and their unconscious motivations: Type 1: Improvers – ethical, meticulous, detail-oriented; unconscious motivation – to perfect themselves, others, and the world.
Type 2: Helpers – warm, caring, giving; unconscious motivation - to be needed and avoid acknowledging that they have personal needs.
Type 3: Performers – success-oriented, image-conscious, wired for productivity; unconscious motivation - success, to appear successful, and to avoid failure at all costs.
Type 4: Romantics – creative, sensitive, moody; unconscious motivation - to be special and unique to compensate for some perceived missing piece in their makeup.
Type 5: Investigator – analytical, emotionally detached, private; unconscious motivation - to gain knowledge, conserve energy, and avoid relying on others.
Type 6: Loyalists – committed, practical, worst-case scenario thinkers; unconscious motivation - fear and the need for security, safety, and support.
Type 7: Enthusiasts – fun, spontaneous, adventurous; unconscious motivation - to be happy and have fun in order to avoid emotional and psychological pain.
Type 8: Challengers – commanding, intense, confrontational; unconscious motivation - to assert strength and power over the environment and others to mask vulnerability.
Type 9: Peacemakers – pleasant, laid back, accommodating; unconscious motivation - to keep the peace to merge with the preferences of others in order to avoid conflict at all costs
Text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Ian on his website, Instagram, or Facebook.
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Today's Talk Therapy episode was sparked when my daughter's 14th birthday got me reflecting on what I might've told my younger self. God reminded me of a blog post I had written years ago as a letter to my 15-year-old self. Consider taking some time this week to write a letter to yourself and see what God reveals to you.
Questions to reflect on this week:
What would you tell your younger self?
What advice would you give her?
What did she worry about that you realize didn’t matter?
Does your current self need to hear this message too?
Don't forget to download my Biblical Body Image Coloring Book!
Connect with Rachael on her website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm chatting with Pastor Tim Ross about his new book Upset the World. Tim is the lead pastor of the multi-ethnic, multi-generational Embassy City Church in Irving, TX. Tim speaks both nationally and internationally strengthening believers with the Good News of Jesus Christ. He began preaching at the age of 20 years old and has already impacted the lives of hundreds of thousands of people. His dynamic teaching style and uncanny ability to make people understand the gospel message is the reason why he has been such an asset to ministries across cultural and denominational lines. Tim is happily married to Juliette, his bride since May 1st, 1999 and they have two sons, Nathan and Noah.
We're talking about: * Tim's background and how he came to Christ. * Asking God to help us crave His word like we crave whatever we're addicted to. * How a verse in Acts inspired him to write his book Upset the World. * Jesus upsets people's worlds with His message of love and hope. * Connecting personal trauma to the trauma of salvation - both upset our lives * "Once [Jesus] has upset your life, He'll ask you to upset others." * The biggest way we can upset people's lives as part of our day-to-day rhythm is to do good. * 2 keys for recognizing the Holy Spirit's nudge - the suggestion is really good and it's intimidating, but keeps pressing. * Fall in love with planting the seed of God's love in people's lives. You're not responsible for the harvest, only the sowing. * Upset means "to turn over," but from heaven's perspective, when things are upside down, they're right-side up. * You break down barriers and build relationships with you destroy stereotypes by listening and meeting people where they are. * Using social media to spread hope instead of debating over opposing viewpoints. * Encouragement to open your heart and let God upset you again.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Tim on his website, Instagram or Facebook
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In this episode of Talk Therapy, I'm talking about the one thing that may be missing from your life - Jesus.
If you're a follower of Christ, I encourage you to lean into Jesus more this week. There is power in His name. Whether it's a work situation, a struggling marriage, or a health challenge - whatever it is you're facing, say the name of Jesus. He is our counselor, our healer, and our peace.
If you don't know Jesus, at the end of this episode I offer a simple prayer to invite Him into your heart. If you make that decision or have more questions, please reach out to me. I'd love to welcome you into the body of Christ and get you connected with more resources!
One Minute Pause app
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with bestselling author Valorie Burton about her latest book Let Go of the Guilt: Stop Beating Yourself Up and Take Back Your Joy. Founder of the Coaching and Positive Psychology Institute (CaPP), Valorie has served clients in over 40 states and ten countries and written thirteen books on personal development, including Successful Women Think Differently, What’s Really Holding You Back and Successful Women Speak Differently. She is a frequent guest expert for the TODAY Show, CNN, Dr. Oz, Oprah Magazine, NPR, Essence, and many others. She has spoken for hundreds of organizations, including GE, McDonald’s Corporation, Verizon, Coca Cola, and the United States military. Ms. Burton has a master’s degree in applied positive psychology from the University of Pennsylvania, a master’s degree in journalism from Florida A&M University, and a BA from Florida State University.
We're talking about: * The difference between an unpleasant experience and a joyful one is often dependant on our intention. * Women struggle with guilt more than men due to natural empathy and seeking out reasons they don't measure up. * We often feel we've done something wrong and Satan uses it as a tool to beat us with. * Guilt can be used as a warning signal to change action. * The top 3 guilt triggers in women are children, eating, and exercise * Investigate if you actually did something wrong by asking God if it aligns with his expectations for you. * Knowing your values and calling out guilt before you make a choice will help you stick to a decision despite outside pressure. * Expectations are thoughts about what you should be doing and are often vague and predicated by others. * Bringing awareness of perfectionism can help us better identify when it's happening and understand ourselves. * We can help raise our girls differently by being transparent about our failures and shame. * Happiness is a risk; guilt is safe. * 3 ways to choose joy - reflect on your blessings, be intentional about connecting with others, and get out and move
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Valorie on her website, Instagram or Facebook
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In this episode of Talk Therapy, I'm talking about the power of presence, specifically your undivided attention in presence.
This week I encourage you to give the gift of your undivided attention to the people around you, whether that's your family, co-workers, or the cashier at the grocery store. I also hope you'll spend some time seeking the Lord. If we communicate love by sharing our presence with others, how much more can we gain by giving our undivided attention to our Heavenly Father?
Psalm 145:18, "The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth."
Connect with Rachael on her website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with author Lisa Bevere about her new book Godmothers: Why You Need One. How to Be One.
Lisa Bevere’s authentic and passionate teachings weave profound biblical truths with practical application. A New York Times best-selling author, her books are in the hands of millions worldwide. Lisa and her husband John are the founders of Messenger International.
We're Talking About: * how Lisa's experience with women in the church lead to God calling her to be the mentor to other women that she wishes she had herself * mentoring doesn't necessarily have to do with age, it's who been further in the process * "God will have us bless others out of our brokenness." * "When I'm committed to growing others, I can't help but grow myself." * using your social media influence to encourage others without making it an idol or letting it determine our value * the role of Godmothers and how to choose who speaks into your life * "When we don't celebrate growth, we become hopeless." * the importance of multiple Godmothers to speak into different areas of life * insecurities about mentoring others - it's better to move and make a mistake than it is to freeze * setting boundaries as a Godmother * We are blessed when we can show people how to cooperate instead of competing or fighting. That's when you discover who you are and your place in God's family.
Links Mentioned in This Episode: Ep. 67: Find Your Strength with Lisa Bevere
Ep. 68: When the Saints Come Marching In with Addison Bevere
Godmothers: Why You Need One. How to Be One.
YouVersion Bible study - Godmothers with Lisa Bevere
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Lisa on her website, Instagram or Facebook
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In this episode of Talk Therapy, I'm sharing a simple tool for anxiety (specifically panic attacks) called square breathing.
We all experience anxiety on different levels. Some are able to cope, while others are more susceptible to overwhelm. By learning how to recognize the signs of anxiety in our bodies, we can better practice relaxation techniques or, if necessary, choose the most beneficial kind of therapy.
Philippians 4:6-7, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we’re talking with Kayla Stoecklein about her book, “Fear Gone Wild: A Story of Mental Illness, Suicide, and Hope Through Loss”. Kayla Stoecklein is an advocate for those confronting mental illness. When she isn’t busy raising her three young boys, you can find her on the beach, sipping an iced coffee and searching for little glimpses of heaven on earth.
We're Talking About:
- Mental illness looks much different in textbooks than in real life.
- Suicide is brutal in the way it has you look back to figure out what you could have done differently.
- Suicide is no one’s fault, it is a tragedy and no one is to blame.
- Many pastors struggle with mental illness and depression, as discussed in the book “Leading on Empty”.
- We can help support our pastors by praying for them and focusing on unity.
- Pastors are not superhuman, they need as much support as the rest of us.
- Instead of reacting when someone brings up suicide try listening and asking questions.
- Asking how you can serve someone while they’re grieving can be very helpful.
- Depression and suicide isn’t a sin issue, it’s a life issue that anyone can grapple with.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Kayla on her website or Instagram
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In this episode of Talk Therapy I'm talking about the difficult, but important topic of suicide. Suicide is the leading cause of death in the US and has affected me personally, as I'm sure it has for many of you listening.
If you're struggling at all with suicidal thoughts, please take a moment to consider if you really want to end your life or if you just need things to change. I also want to strongly urge you to seek help from a medical professional.
You can call the toll-free National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or visit http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we’re talking with Dr. Jon Chasteen about his first book, “Half the Battle: Healing Your Hidden Hurts”.
Dr. Jon Chasteen is president of The King’s University and lead pastor of Victory Church, a multicampus church based out of Oklahoma City. Passionate about empowering and equipping the local church through the preparation of Christlike servant-leaders, Dr. Chasteen desires to lead TKU’s faculty and administration with transparency and authenticity. Prior to arriving at TKU in 2018, his experience included seven years of pastoral leadership and six years of administrative leadership in Christian higher education. Dr. Chasteen has three earned degrees, including a Doctor of Education from Oral Roberts University. He and his wife, Michele, are blessed to enjoy life with their two children, Corey and Jace.
We’re talking about:
- “Today I have rolled away the reproach of Egypt from you.” Joshua 5:9
- We act like Mary and Martha and hide away our pain.
- “God brings things up because they’re on their way out.”
- “We can ignore even pleasure, but pain insists on being attended to.” C.S. Lewis
- Many times our pain comes from a moment of rejection.
- Jesus was the stone that the builds rejected.
- Before God crumbled the walls of Jericho, He first crumbled the walls of their hearts.
- Their worship became their warship.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Jon on his website, his church website, or Instagram
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This week on Talk Therapy I'm talking about why the position of your heart matters. When our hearts are turned inward, we become hardened and bitter, but when we surrender and turn to the Lord, He will heal us and instruct us.
Take a moment today ask yourself two questions - how is my heart and what is the position of my heart? Let God reveal the places that need to be healed.
The Naked Marriage Podcast
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re talking with Andy Andrews, author of the new book “Just Jones: Sometimes a Thing Is Impossible... Until It Is Actually Done”. You will recognize our special guest from his more than 200 appearances on national television. You might even recognize his voice. He has done more than 1,000 radio interviews. And while he is not a comedian, portions of his speeches are actually played on SiriusXM’s comedy channels—multiple times—every single day. He is the author of more than 25 books that have been translated into more than 40 languages. Among those books are several New York Times bestsellers, including the modern-day classics: The Traveler’s Gift and The Noticer. On ABC’s Good Morning America, The Traveler’s Gift was named one of the “Five Books You Must Read In Your Lifetime.” He has been to the White House on several occasions and has spoken at the request of four different presidents of the United States. He coached our nation’s Special Operations Command for eight years and has been a part of nine College Football National Championship teams in a row. He works as a consultant to Fortune 500 companies, small businesses, and sometimes, entire communities who hire him to create a starting point for extraordinary results. His newest book—Just Jones...Sometimes a thing is impossible until it is actually done—released September 8, 2020. A New York Times reporter recently wrote, “Andy Andrews has quietly become one of the most influential people in America.” Listen in each week to his podcast at The Professional Noticer.
We're talking about: * Non-fiction gives facts but fiction fires the imagination. * Imagination allows you a different way of looking at something. * Andy views Jones as an illustration of how the Holy Spirit works through us. * You can’t believe everything you think. * God has a better imagination than us when it comes to thinking of the best. * Forgiveness is key. * Hope is provable in your future.
Don't forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Andy on his website, Instagram, or Facebook
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Have you ever had a sleepless night spent thinking about everything on your to-do list that didn't get done? It can be overwhelming. In this episode of Talk Therapy, I'm sharing how God changed my perspective on my to-do list in a way that helps me feel refreshed and empowered to do more instead of anxiety and guilt that things are left undone.
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael we talk with Alli Worthington about her new book “Standing Strong: A Woman's Guide to Overcoming Adversity and Living with Confidence“. Alli Worthington's goal is to help women live the life they were created to live. She lives outside Nashville with her husband, Mark, their five sons, and the only golden retriever who refuses to retrieve. She's a popular Christian women's speaker who travels the country sharing her humor, practical advice, and encouragement. She hosts her top-rated weekly podcast, The Alli Worthington Show, and brings us friends she loves, experts to learn from, and coaches listeners in life, business, and faith.
We’re talking about:
- Self-empowerment can be as crippling as self-doubt.
- You can’t let everything rely on your ability to hustle, God is the one that helps you across the finish line.
- Make sure the people you’re listening to are pointing the way to Jesus.
- God’s vision for us is not passive, but strong and active.
- Disappointing others is not a sin, sometimes it’s exactly what God needs you to do.
- Alli counts down from 5 when trying to get herself to do something unpleasant, learned from “The 5 Second Rule Book” by Mel Robbins.
- There’s a process from the anointing to the appointing.
- If your thoughts are shaming or critical, it’s not of God.
- Playing small is not being humble and can sometimes be an act of disobedience.
To find out more about Called Creatives, visit their website.
Don't forget to text “Superpower” to 55444 to get a free quiz from Alli!
Text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Alli on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
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In today's Talk Therapy I'm talking about something powerful that is readily available to all of us - God's favor.
We might assume that those whom He favors are people who seem to have a perfect life, but favor doesn't equal possessions or accomplishments. "Favor" is best defined as "demonstrated delight." To have the Lord's favor is to be in accord with Him.
Proverbs 16:7, "When the Lord takes pleasure in anyone’s way, he causes their enemies to make peace with them."
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we’re talking with Dr. Deb Gorton about her new book “Embracing Uncomfortable: Facing Our Fears While Pursuing Our Purpose”. Dr. Deb Gorton (B.A. Arizona State University; M.A., Ph.D. Fuller Theological Seminary) is the Gary Chapman Chair of Marriage, Family Ministry, and Therapy at Moody Theological Seminary and Graduate School. For more than fourteen years Deb has worked as a change agent for individuals, organizations, and emerging leaders, helping them refine, embrace, and thrive in their purpose. Built on the foundation of relationship, her core philosophy is that collaboration in community produces radical transformation. Deb resides in Chicago and she is also the host of the Becoming Well podcast.
We’re talking about:
- Where do we really see our identity?
- Too many people make the failures in their life an identity versus an experience.
- Taking responsibility for our mistakes doesn’t make it part of our identity, it shows maturity.
- Comfort is what makes us feel safe and secure in the moment.
- Embracing uncomfortable is about choosing what to do that aligns with our values rather than what aligns with our comfort in the moment.
- Our core values are really critical to who we are as a person.
- Contentment is a discipline in our lives, we can choose to be content.
- We choose comfort in the moment but the cost is long term discomfort.
- Comfort is good when it is involved in self stewardship.
- Sometimes being uncomfortable will inconvenience us.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Deb on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
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In today's episode of Talk Therapy I'm talking about leaning on the Holy Spirit as our helper because the peace that comes when we're willing to submit to the Spirit of God far outweighs anything we can make happen in our own strength.
If you want to learn more about the Holy Spirit, I encourage you to read The God I Never Knew by Robert Morris and watch his sermon series on the book.
And don't forget to download my NEW free Biblical Body Image Coloring Book!
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I'm talking with Wall Street Journal bestselling author, life coach, and counselor Holley Gerth about her new book The Powerful Purpose of Introverts. Her previous books include Strong, Brave, Loved: Empowering Reminders of Who You Really Are, Fiercehearted: Live Fully, Love Bravely, and You’re going to Be Okay: Encouraging Truth Your Heart Needs to Hear, Especially on the Hard Days. Holley co-founded (in)courage, a site that received almost one million views in its first six months and co-hosts the popular podcast More Than Small Talk. She also serves over 25,000 subscribers through her blog. Holley is passionate about empowering people, especially introverts, to embrace who they are and become all they’re created to be.
We're talking about: * The heart behind her new book The Powerful Purpose of Introverts * Whether you're an introvert or extrovert is not about personality, but about how our brains are wired * Introverts are people who prefer calm environments because their brains are wired to thrive when focusing on one thing at a time * You can best love the introvert/extrovert in your life by speaking their love language at the volume they prefer * Deeper science behind the brains of introverts and extroverts * Introverts and extroverts experience happiness differently - introverts through calm and contentment, extroverts through excitement and enthusiasm * Research shows we all become more introverted over time, but never change sides from the way we're wired at birth * Tips for introverts seeking calm space * Strategic solitude - solitude empowers us to love more, isolation separates us * Introverts power of genuine influence * Finding your sacred confidence - connecting with God is not one-size-fits-all * Misconceptions about introverts
Links mentioned: What % Introvert are You 1-Minute Quiz
Order The Powerful Purpose of Introverts
Ep. 20: Exchanging "I'm Fine" for "You're Mine" with Holley Gerth
Quiet by Susan Cain
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Connect with Holley on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
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In this special episode of Talk Therapy, I'm talking with author Emily P. Freeman about how we can all use writing as therapy.
Whether you're an aspiring writer feeling defeated staring at a blank page or someone who just wishes they would journal more, Emily offers some practical steps on how to get started.
She also explains how boundaries can help increase creativity, clears up some misconceptions of what it means to write, and shares about Hope*Writers - a community of working writers dedicated to helping you make progress as you learn to balance the art of writing with the business of publishing.
Links Mentioned:
Allison Fallon
Take the Hope*Writers 30-Second Quiz
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we’re talking with Jamie Ivey, author of the book “You Be You: Why Satisfaction and Success Are Closer Than You Think” Jamie is a podcaster, writer, and speaker from Austin, Texas. She is the proud mama of four kids and the wife of Aaron, worship pastor of The Austin Stone Community Church. Jamie loves to encourage women to passionately follow Jesus through whatever stage of life. She does this through writing and her weekly podcast, The Happy Hour with Jamie Ivey.
We’re talking about:
- Jamie found herself and others comparing themselves to other women in a negative way.
- Are you looking to be successful, or are you looking to be faithful to what God has given to you?
- First, find your “why”. What motivates you? What’s your purpose?
- Once you’ve figured out why you’re doing something, you can tell if you’re being faithful.
- Quality is so much more important than quantity.
- Trust that where you are right now is exactly where God wants you.
- Your voice matters right where you are.
- Even if you don’t have a platform, your ideas, convictions, and passions matter.
- When we feel like God is holding out on us, we tend to get jealous of what we think others have.
- Don’t be afraid to take a Social Media break for the sake of your soul.
- Our ultimate calling in this life as a Christian is to make God known and bring Him glory.
- Text the word “Friend” to 33777 to receive a free printable and more information about Jamie’s book!
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Jamie on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
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Did you know that you have the power to control your thoughts? In this episode of Talk Therapy, I'm talking about changing the channel in your mind because our thoughts control our feelings and our feelings control our actions.
2 Corinthians 10:5, "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."
The Battlefield of the Mind Devotional
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Listen on Apple podcasts
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we have a very special guest, my dad Bill Goldner! He and his wife have built and pastored three churches over 35 years. During that time they also founded the New Lifehouse Girls Home and Picture in Scripture Amphitheater. They have also founded Oasis Animal Adventures, which provides special services to special people by interacting with a wide variety of animals. Bill is also the author of "Dealing with Disappointment", a quick but encouraging read. Bill Goldner and his wife Linda have five fantastic children and twelve terrific grandchildren. He and his wife live in Disney, Oklahoma.
We’re talking about:
- Our answer to darkness is God’s total Light.
- Where the spirit of the Lord is, there’s liberty.
- Nobody’s future has room for their past.
- A powerful prayer for another person is to pray that God opens the eyes of their heart.
- God’s message is the same for us all, religious or not.
- Numbers don’t matter, Jesus came for the one.
- Eating dinner together is Bill’s number one tip for leaving a Godly legacy.
- A legacy is something that is transferred through relationship.
- Reading to your children and reading with them is another good way to build a Godly legacy.
- Not making the time to spend with your children can build resentment over time.
Find out more about Oasis Animal Adventures by visiting their website, or visit the donation page if you feel called to donate to their cause.
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This week on Talk Therapy we're talking about breaking generational curses. Take some time this week to identify spiritual themes in your family lineage (try using a genogram to aid you) and ask God what curses He wants to break off of you and your family for generations to come.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we’re talking with Sara Hagerty, author of the book “Adore: A Simple Practice for Experiencing God in the Middle Minutes of Your Day”. Sara Hagerty is a lover of God, a wife to Nate, and a mother of seven—four adopted from Africa and three through miracle pregnancies. She’s also a bestselling author and speaker. As a lifelong admirer of words, Sara has experienced their power to revive. Raw words written in tearful honesty and shared with her readers. Words whispered in hidden places as conversation with God and worship to Him. Today Sara’s words offer God’s hope to readers facing unexpected life circumstances.
We’re talking about:
- Sara started practicing adoration at a weak point of her life and found herself getting healed by it.
- “Adoration is talking to God from a raw place...Adoration is just talking to God in the middle of your day.”
- Romans 12:2, NIV: "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.
- Sara found that she couldn’t just stop thinking the bad thoughts that came through her mind all the time, but if she prayed on God’s word it would slowly replace those thoughts.
- “The more that I put His words in my mouth the more that my thoughts get changed.”
- 2 Corinthians 12:9, NIV: “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is perfected in weakness.”
- God’s pace for our lives might look dramatically different than our own pace.
- Start adoration where you are, even if you don’t feel like it.
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Connect with Sara on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
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On this episode of Talk Therapy, I'm talking about a word that God has been reiterating to me during this challenging season - persist.
The Bible offers a lot of encouragement to those who continue firmly in spite of difficulty, opposition, or failure. 1 Corinthians 15:58 reads, "Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain."
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we’re talking with author Nicole Zasowski about her book “From Lost to Found: Giving Up What You Think You Want for What Will Set You Free”. Nicole Zasowski is a licensed marriage and family therapist, writer, and speaker. As an old soul who wears her heart proudly on her sleeve, Nicole loves using her words to help others find an enduring peace and joy outside of circumstance. She lives in a small town just outside New York City with her husband, Jimmy, and her son, James.
We’re talking about:
- Recognizing the warning signs of when you feel your sense of identity or safety has been violated is important. Watch for feelings of anxiety or withdrawing behavior.
- Nicole believes that good therapy is the “one-two” punch of treatment and practice.
- Self-control might get you a day or two of feeling better, but it’s only a temporary treatment.
- You don’t have to believe the good things about yourself are true before you start telling yourself the good things. Even if you don’t feel it, you should still lift yourself up.
- Don’t feel like it’s more important to have people clap for you rather than connect with you.
- Empty hands are open to receive.
- There’s no rest when your identity is in your performance.
- Praise your children’s personhood as much as their performance.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Nicole on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
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The Bible emphasizes the sanctity and beauty of marriage, but every relationship requires commitment and sacrifice. This week on Talk Therapy I'm encouraging you to fight for your marriage. Take time this week to communicate with your spouse about what you need from them during your emotional ups and downs and ask how you can better help them.
Gottman Marriage Minute sign up
Gottman Marriage Minute archive
The 5 Love Languages
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we’re talking with Angela Braniff about her new book, “Love Without Borders: How Bold Faith Opens the Door to Embracing the Unexpected”. Angela Braniff is the founder of the popular YouTube channel, This Gathered Nest. She is an adoption advocate, home school mom, content creator, podcast host, and adventure seeker. Angela is married to her high-school sweetheart and together they have a full house: Kennedy (12) - their biological daughter, Shelby (10) - their 2nd biological daughter, Rosie (7) - adopted from China, Noah (7) - adopted from Congo, Jonah (5) - adopted domestically, and finally, Ivy + Amelia (18-month old twins) - adopted as embryos—Angela gave birth to them! Adding to their family of seven kids, after the book was finished, Angela and CR welcomed their eighth child, Benjamin, through adoption. Angela lives in North Carolina and has been featured in People, Today, UPTV, BuzzFeed, etc.
We're Talking About: * You can’t always fill fulfilled by reaching the standard “American Dream”. * Trusting in God’s timing is always the best way. * Angela felt completely changed after leaving Africa and knew she wanted to adopt more children. * God exposed a stumbling block of Angela’s, trusting him with finances. God says come through this open door and He will make a way. * God was able to make a family out of broken pieces. * God can take our questions and our anger.
Click here to register for Uplift Online 2020
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A few years ago we were homeschooling and during math my daughter became angry. This particular daughter is an introvert and prefers to communicate through written word and drawing. I asked her to draw a picture to let me know what she was feeling.
This was a tipping point in our relationship, but I also learned a valuable lesson that day: what appears to be the problem is rarely the problem.
You can see her picture and read more on my website: rachaelgilbert.com/talk-therapy-whats-really-bothering-you
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re talking with Dawn Barton, author of Laughing Through the Ugly Cry: …and Finding Unstoppable Joy. A multibillion-dollar direct sales company put Dawn on their Times Square billboard in the summer of 2018. In Dawn’s thirty years of sales and marketing, she has been a top producer at every company she’s worked for. Most recently, she was the #7 Sales Director in Mary Kay when she took a leap of faith and left it all to write her first book, Laughing Through the Ugly Cry. Dawn has been a public speaker for more than ten years, giving talks about cancer, joy, female empowerment, and direct sales. When she’s not encouraging other women to find joy and humor in even the most difficult of circumstances, you can find her living happily ever after in Cantonment, FL with her husband, daughter, parents, and mother-in-law.
We're Talking About: * Joy and pain are often intertwined because when you’re in pain is when you’re the closest to God. * Dawn lost faith in God when she experienced the loss of her child, but God “courted” her over the next 10 years until she came back. * Joy and peace are related as well, follow the peace when looking for the right decision. * “Sometimes the thing you think you were created to do for the rest of your life is what you needed to do for the next season of your life.” * Success is obedience. * “God can move mountains but don’t be surprised when he throws you the shovel.”
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Dawn on her website, Facebook, or Instagram
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This week on Talk Therapy I'm talking about the all-too-familiar trap of comparison. God created us all with a unique purpose, but so often we find ourselves looking around at everyone else and feeling inadequate. Ask yourself today if there's anything you're pursuing that God hasn't called you to.
Hebrews 12:1 ESV, "Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us."
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we’re talking to Paula Faris, author of the new book “Called Out: Why I Traded Two Dream Jobs for a Life of True Calling”. Paula Faris is a senior national correspondent at ABC News and host of the popular podcast Journeys of Faith with Paula Faris, which gives an intimate look at how some of the world’s most influential people lean on faith and spirituality in the best and worst of times. An Emmy Award-winning journalist, Paula previously was co-anchor of the Good Morning America weekend edition, as well as a co-host of The View.
We're talking about: * We’re stuck thinking that our calling is all about our work life, but it may not be. * God is looking for an obedient heart. * Follow your peace. * Peace comes from the Holy Spirit. * God tells us to not be afraid or discouraged. * Your worth isn’t your work. * It’s okay to feel some fear when finding your calling. * Vocational Callings have three facets: Do you love it, are you good at it, and do trusted people in your life say you’re good at it and love it. * It’s a lie from society and the Devil that you can’t take a few years off to stay with your family and then go back. There are always vocational opportunities for you if you choose to go back.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Paula on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we’re talking with Jessica Hottle, the author of the book “Own Your Worth: Learn to Overcome Feeling Less Than and Not Good Enough”. Jessica Hottle's passion for helping others "weigh" less emotionally, physically, and spiritually. She inspires and encourages thousands by sharing her own personal struggles, victories, and journey through life. Jessica is a successful online entrepreneur and author of two best-selling books, Know Your Worth and A Worthy Wife. Along with a third book, Own Your Worth. Her passions are being a wife to her husband, Jon, being a momma to their three cats, and spending her free time outside whenever she can (playing golf, hiking, reading, or writing in her journal). Jessica has a heart that runs hard after Jesus and credits everything she has done to her Savior.
We're talking about:
- Jessica used to judge her worth by her job, body, and men.
- We need to use God’s view of proper self-love for our bodies.
- “Everybody’s healthy looks different, but everybody needs to address Spirit, Soul, and Body to be healthy.”
- One of the biggest lies Jessica hears is that God wants us to be sick. God wants you well.
- God’s best for you is not being sick, he wants to heal you.
- If the first doctor didn’t heal you, get a second opinion!
- Our worth is not based on how many good things we can do or our feelings.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Jessica on her website or Instagram
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re talking with Donna VanLiere, author of the new book “The Time of Jacob’s Trouble”. Donna VanLiere is a New York Times best-selling author of many books, including The Christmas Shoes and The Christmas Blessing, both of which were made into movies starring Rob Lowe, Neil Patrick Harris, and Kimberly Williams-Paisley. Donna is the recipient of a Retailer's Choice Award for Fiction, a Dove Award, a Silver Angel Award, an Audie Award for best inspirational fiction, a nominee for a Gold Medallion Book of the Year and was recently inducted into the Ohio Foundation of Independent Colleges Hall of Excellence joining such luminaries as Coretta Scott King, Hugh Downs, Dr. Norman Vincent Peale, and Senator John Glenn. Donna is an in-demand conference speaker having appeared at countless women's and family events, including select Women of Faith and Extraordinary Women conferences. She lives in Franklin, Tennessee, with her husband, Troy, and their children, Grace, Kate and David.
We're talking about: * Jesus’ return is our blessed hope. * Prophecy takes up over 27% of the Bible. * The Bible has over 500 fulfilled prophecies. * Even Jesus doesn’t know the time of his coming, if anyone tries to predict it, it’s false teaching. * Donna has a limited series podcast called Things Are Looking Up to explain more about the end-time prophecies.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Donna on her website or Facebook
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This Week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re talking with Briana Stensrud and Latasha Morrison about their documentary Who Is Welcome Here. Briana Stensrud is a human dignity advocate and the Director of Welcome. Her passion is to equip the Church to engage more consistently and tangibly in holistic human dignity issues. Throughout her work in the pro-life movement, Briana continually faced questions from those concerned about immigrants and refugees. Understanding that many concerns were rooted in fear and misinformation she started a journey to re-discover God’s heart for the sojourner.
Latasha Morrison is a speaker, author of “Be the Bridge”, reconciler, bridge-builder, and leader, committed to educating people on cultural intelligence and racial literacy. She founded Be the Bridge in 2016 to encourage racial reconciliation among all ethnicities, to promote racial unity in America, and to equip others to do the same.
We're Talking About: * We must each learn to see others through a “God Lens” so we can see the image of God in each person. * Younger people are often the ones who suffer the most when it comes to immigration. * Girls are 80 to 90% likely to be sexually assaulted on their way into North America. * If we know their individual stories, we will be moved by them.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Briana on her website, Instagram, or Facebook.
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we’re talking with Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith about her book “Sacred Rest: Recover Your Life, Renew Your Energy, Restore Your Sanity”. Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith is a busy physician, author, and mom, who understand that life’s demands can leave you feeling mentally overwhelmed, emotionally drained, and physically tired. Daily she helps the overstressed deal with their work-rest imbalance and find actionable answers to the thriving lifestyle they desire. She has been featured in many media outlets including Daystar, Redbook, MSNBC, Psychology Today, and as a guest on the Dr. Oz show. Her latest book is Sacred Rest: Recover Your Life, Renew Your Energy, Restore Your Sanity, including ground-breaking insight on the seven types of rest needed to optimize your productivity, increase your overall happiness, overcome burnout, and live your best life. Over 90,000 people have discovered their personal rest deficits using her free assessment at RestQuiz.com.
We’re talking about:
- There are seven types of rest we all need, Physical, Mental, Social, Sensory, Emotional, Creative, and Spiritual.
- We often ruminate on thoughts late into the evening, it’s best to avoid deep thinking activities right before bed.
- Writing the things down that we’re ruminating on can help to relieve our mind and allow us to rest.
- Watching the news and scrolling social media before bed can be detrimental.
- We all need people in our lives we can be open and authentic with.
- There’s a healing and restoration from being in the presence of someone who’s lifegiving to you.
- It’s very important to embrace silence and calm for Sensory rest.
- Take Dr. Saundra’s Rest Quiz to find out where you need the most help.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Saundra on her website, Instagram, and Facebook.
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Something has shifted in my spirit in the last few months and I am calling it "the holy spirit hustle". That's what we're talking about on today's talk therapy episode.
I started blogging about six years ago just because I wanted to write what God put on my heart. But somewhere along the way, I lost myself and the reason I started. I started to hustle after the things the experts told me I should be doing to grow and build.
This forced rest due in our society forced me to stop listening to all the voices telling me what I should be doing and to start leaning into the voice of the holy spirit again.
Read my Instagram post here.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re talking with Sharon Jaynes about her new book, “The Power of a Woman's Words: How the Words You Speak Shape the Lives of Others”.
For ten years Sharon served as Vice President of Proverbs 31 Ministries and co-host for their daily radio feature. She is the author of 24 books with Harvest House, Moody Publishers, Baker Books, Multnomah Publishers, and Thomas Nelson. She has also written numerous magazine articles and devotions for publications such as Focus on the Family, Extraordinary Women, Decision, Crosswalk.com, and In Touch. Sharon is a frequent guest on radio and television programs such as Revive Our Hearts with Nancy Leigh DeMoss, Family Life Today with Dennis Rainey, and Focus on the Family. Sharon currently writes for Proverbs 31 Ministries' Encouragement for Today devotions and teaches at their She Speaks conference.
We’re talking about:
- Sharon’s rough homelife let her see the power of words, both positive and negative.
- It’s important to speak life over your children.
- It’s better to build up children than repair adults.
- “Our words become the mirror in which other people see themselves.”
- Kids need to know that they’re liked, not just loved.
- Make sure to compliment your children’s character.
- Reject the lies that the devil tells and accept God’s truth about you.
- Whatever is in your heart will come out of your mouth.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Sharon on her website, Instagram, or Facebook.
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This week on Talk Therapy I'm talking about the importance of spending time in prayer before you speak. I could give you tips on how to control your tongue, but the truth is that when we haven’t spent enough time in our prayer closet, the words that come out of our mouths and heart will shock ourselves and damage others.
Read more about the four "R"s of our prayer closet: rachaelgilbert.com/4-reasons-to-pray-before-you-speak/
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we’re talking with Dr. Sasha Shillcutt. She is the author of Between Grit and Grace: The Art of Being Feminine and Formidable, renowned Cardiac Anesthesiologist, TEDX speaker, and Founder of Brave Enough where she leads and encourages more than 10,000 female physicians.
We’re talking about:
- We can be both grace-giving or gritty, depending on what the situation needs.
- Being inauthentic to yourself serves no one.
- 30 minutes a day alone can give you time to reset and evaluate where you’re at.
- At the busiest time of our life, we should have friends to help us make it through.
- Because of the pressure to be perfect, sometimes we’re too hard on ourselves and others.
- “We post and project perfection because it’s safe.”
- We need to ask ourselves what having it all means to us.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Sasha on her website, Instagram, or Twitter.
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This week on Talk Therapy we are digging into the art of listening. While it is true that some people are more natural listeners than others, it is is still an art that we all must work on in order to have thriving relationships and meaningful conversations.
Today we talked about the acronym SOLER when it comes to the art of listening:
- sit squarely
- maintain an open posture
- at times, lean in
- demonstrate appropriate eye contact
- relax
You can learn more here: https://rachaelgilbert.com/learn-to-listen/
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re talking with Wendy Speake about her new book, The 40-Day Sugar Fast: Where Physical Detox Meets Spiritual Transformation. As a trained actress and heartfelt Bible teacher, Wendy ministers to women's hearts through storytelling and Biblical life applications. Co-author of the popular parenting books Triggers and Parenting Scripts, and host of the annual 40 Day Sugar Fast. Wendy lives in Southern California with her husband Matt and their 3 sons, where she blogs about faith and family at WendySpeake.com.
We're talking about:
- “We know that God says come to me, and yet we go to our phones and our pantries…”
- We know how sugar crashes affect our kids, it affects us in the same way.
- It’s not just a food fast but a Word feast.
- Doing the fast together, especially as mothers and daughters, can be a big benefit.
- Rather than doing it to lose a few pounds, seek God and his righteousness first.
- Even if your reasons for fasting aren’t perfect, God can still use it.
- “My sugar fast broke my addiction to sugar, but my Social Media fast broke my addiction to the sugar of affirmation.”
- The 40-Day Social Media Fast is available for Pre-Order now.
- God wants the whole day with you, not just 15 minutes in the morning.
- Let’s turn to God instead of turning to everything else.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Wendy on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
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This week on Talk Therapy we're talking about what it really looks like to treat your body like God's temple.
Renewed: 21-Days to a Submitted Heart, Sound Mind and Strong Body devotional
To learn more, please check out my Biblical Body Image series:
#32: Real Talk about Biblical Body Image
#33: 5 Reasons We Struggle with Body Image
#34: The Power of a Submitted Heart & Sound Mind
#35: Simple Steps for a Strong Body
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachel we’re talking with Rachel Macy Stafford. Rachel Macy Stafford is a writer with one goal: to help people choose love as much as humanly possible. Her latest book is Live Love Now: Relieve the Pressure and Find Real Connection with Our Kids. She is also the New York Times bestselling author of Hands-Free Mama, Hands-Free Life, and Only Love Today. She is a certified special education teacher with a Master’s Degree in education; an in-demand speaker; and a beloved blogger who inspires millions in her weekly blog posts at HandsFreeMama.com and through her supportive Facebook community, The Hands-Free Revolution.
We're talking about:
- Many kids today feel unheard and unseen, that no one knows who they really are.
- A lot of kids feel micromanaged, there’s no time for fun or trying new things.
- Adults feel the same kind of pressures that our children do, but silently.
- We teach our children these damaging ideas because that’s what we’re telling ourselves.
- When you put a child on a path that’s not authentic to them you see depression and anxiety.
- Listening to what calls your heart gives you energy and purpose, it’s not easy, it’s necessary.
- “It’s a gift to be able to be human with your child so they can be human with you.”
- We’re there to encourage.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Rachel Stafford on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
Connect with Rachael Gilbert on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
In the last few weeks on Talk Therapy, we have taken a deep dive into our emotions. This week we are going to put our thoughts on trial.
Your root (thoughts) affects your mood (feelings) and your mood affects your behavior (actions)!
In other words, renew your mind, and your life will follow.
To follow along with today's short episode, download this guide from therapist aid:
Putting thoughts on trial (PDF Download)
You can also grab the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy worksheet that Rachael references in the podcast here:
rachaelgilbert.com/thoughts
Phil. 4:8, "And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise."
PRAY over your thoughts!
If you are feeling brave, leave a review or comment for the show and let us know what God said to you during this episode.
That is all for today’s episode of Talk Therapy. Be sure to join us Wednesday for an interview on Real Talk with Rachael!
Connect with Rachael on her website, Instagram and Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re talking with Tracey Mitchell about her new book “Becoming Brave: How to Think Big, Dream Wildly, and Live Fear-Free”. Tracey is an international speaker, a published author of the inspirational Downside Up, TV Host of Life From DFW, and CEO of 'The Winning Woman' Consulting Group. Her love of life is evident, as is her passion for Christ and compassion for hurting people. Living in Dallas, Texas, Tracey is a wife and mom.
We're talking about: * As we take steps in bravery, fear will lessen. * Why is it so hard for women to recognize when we’ve been courageous? * “We have to shatter shame before it shatters our destiny.” * “Nothing pushes us away from the plan and purposes of God more than walking in disharmony.” * Tracey learned to find her steadiness by staying in the word of God every day. * Many women suffer silently because they don’t feel like they can come to God. * God’s silent presence speaks volumes.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Tracey on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
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This week on Talk Therapy we're concluding our series about emotions. If you haven't, please listen to parts one and two of this series as well.
In this episode, I'm talking about expressing our emotions and validating the emotions of our loved ones with humility and courage.
For more communication tips, please visit rachaelgilbert.com/marriage.
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This week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re talking with Kate Battistelli, author of The God Dare: Will You Choose to Believe the Impossible?. Kate Battistelli is living proof God can and will use anyone if they’re willing.
Kate experienced infertility, miscarriage, an abortion at age 18, and four failed adoption attempts, which all wreaked havoc on her life. Kate had a life-changing experience as a young actress in New York City, going from understudy to starring as Anna in the Broadway National Tour of The King and I opposite Yul Brynner for more than 1,000 performances. Kate and her husband laid down their careers and the Broadway theatre in answer to their first “God dare” and moved out of New York City and into a life of homeschooling and a home business. As their daughter Francesca grew and began expressing her gifts in music and songwriting, they realized there was a far bigger purpose in leaving their careers than they could’ve imagined. Kate is the mother of DOVE and GRAMMY award-winning Christian recording artist Francesca Battistelli. She’s also one-third of the popular Mom to Mom Podcast. Kate is a natural encourager and believes in your ability to change the world.
We're talking about: * God often dares us to do something big, but we have to say yes. * “Choose to be chosen to change the world.” * It’s important that we listen to what’s God plan is for us and for our children. * Don’t be afraid to dream big for your children. * As in Titus 2, older women should be mentoring younger women. * “It’s the small deeds of ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay.”
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Kate on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
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This week on Talk Therapy with Rachael we're continuing our series about emotions. If you haven't listened to part one about identifying your emotions, I suggest you start there.
In part two I'm sharing about the importance of feeling our emotions - both good and bad - and inviting God to help us learn through them.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re talking with Addison Bevere, who just published his new book, “Saints: Becoming More Than Christians”. Addison appreciates the simple things in life—time spent playing with his four kids, late-night conversations with his wife, interesting words that no one uses, a meaningful day of work, and, of course, a good book. Addison is also the COO of Messenger International, an organization that impacts millions of people in over 150 countries through its various initiatives, and the cofounder of SonsAndDaughters.tv.
What We’re Talking About: * The word Christian is used only three times in the New Testament, but the word Saint is used over 60 times. * Christianity today is very individualistic. * Saints are disruptive, they play by a different set of rules. * We’re called to be Saints every day, where ever we are. * Modern-day Christians don’t see their daily life as sacred. * If Satan can steal your present he can undermine your future. * Grace is unlimited from God. * God sees our darkest parts, and yet he calls us lovely.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Addison on his website, Instagram, or Facebook.
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This week on Talk Therapy with Rachael we are talking about emotions. What are they? Why should we identify them?
Emotions are not the enemy. The more we embrace them, the less they control us. Not feeling or expressing emotions only makes them grow and get expressed in awkward ways.
You can find the resources discussed in this episode here.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re talking with Lisa Bevere about her new book “Strong: Devotions to Live a Powerful and Passionate Life”. Lisa Bevere’s authentic and passionate teachings weave profound biblical truths with practical application. A New York Times best-selling author, her books are in the hands of millions worldwide. Lisa and her husband John are the founders of Messenger International.
WHAT WE'RE CHATTING ABOUT:
- Strong is not wrong.
- Meekness is not weakness, meekness is self-control.
- You’re not a threat to the enemy when you’re weak.
- God is the source of our strength.
- An idol is what you draw your strength from or give your strength to.
- We are in a spiritual battle, not one against flesh and blood.
- In these times, we should build an ark of God’s presence.
- Repentance is a reset. When we repent we recover our true selves.
- God wants you to be expectant of good things.
- It’s honoring to lend your strength to your husband’s strength.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Lisa on her website, Instagram, or Facebook.
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This week on Talk Therapy I'm sharing a personal story about how God redeemed something precious in my life and He wants to do the same for you. God is good and it's His desire to bless us.
Numbers 6:24-26, "The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.”
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re talking with Esther Fleece Allen about her book, “Your New Name: Saying Goodbye to the Labels That Limit”. CNN has called Esther one of “Five Women to Watch in Religion,” USA Today has named her one of the “New Faces of Evangelicalism” and Christianity Today has called her “one of the 50 women shaping the church and culture.” She is a graduate of the Oxford Center of Christian Apologetics and is currently in seminary. Her favorite new names are “wife” and “mama” as she is thankful to have a new home with them.
What We're Talking About:
- There’s a difference between the labels you give yourself and the name God gives you.
- We often get labeled by someone close to us.
- “Our names are written in the book of life, not our labels.”
- There’s a difference between sins, inequities, and transgressions.
- God wants to speak to us through his word.
- A name change will look different for every person.
- “I am a daughter of God and that is enough.”
- God wants you to resign as an employee and be a son or daughter instead. We don’t have to earn our worth with God.
- We are more than conquerors!
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Esther on her website, Instagram, or Facebook.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram, or Facebook.
Today on Talk Therapy we are discussing common signs of burnout and how to avoid it.
The following steps can help with self-assessment:
- Ask yourself difficult questions about how you are. My favorite question to ask friends and clients is, "how is your heart?".
- Answer honestly. The more honestly you can answer these questions, the better prepared you will be to make changes, as necessary.
- Utilize this self-care assessment form
- Try these self-care ideas
- Don't forget, self-care is a multi-dimensional aspect of ourselves. Look at this wellness wheel and see where you may be deficient.
For more resources mentioned in this episode, visit rachaelgilbert.com/how-to-avoid-burnout.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re talking with Dr. Jim Bob Haggerton, husband of Dr. Cindy Haggerton, who is a former guest on our show - an episode that is in the top three downloads of all time for this podcast. We talk about their marriage story from his perspective and how they got things back on track after infidelity in their marriage and how strengthening their marriage helped them take on the valleys that life has given them.
Dr. Haggerton describes himself as a super blessed guy who's married to a superhero, father to four kids here on earth with one on the way and one who is waiting on him in heaven. He is a chiropractor by training and lover of all things nutrition and physiology.
We're talking about:
- When your spouse acts out of character, it’s important to give them grace and look for the reasons that might be causing their mood shift.
- Remember to H.A.L.T during an argument, make sure you or you’re spouse is not Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired before you react to a situation.
- Red flags include not sleeping in the same room as your spouse and not being affectionate at all.
- Cindy’s reliance on God and prayer is what saved their marriage.
- The healing time for an affair is at least three to five years.
Additional resources:
Listen to Cindy Haggerton's episode
AffairRecovery.com
MarriageToday.com
“When Leaders Live Together” by Larry & Devi Titus
“Keep Your Love On” by Danny Silk
“Kingdom Man” by Tony Evans
“Love & Respect” by Emerson Eggerichs
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Dr. Haggerton on his website, Facebook, or Instagram.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram or Facebook.
This week on Talk Therapy with Rachael I'm talking about something that I'm struggling with right now - disappointment. Chances are that you are too on some level. The good news is that we're not alone.
Psalm 34:18, "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
Dealing with Disappointment by Bill Goldner
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week we’re talking with Debra Fileta about her new book, “Love in Every Season: Understanding the Four Stages of Every Healthy Relationship”. Debra Fileta is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, relationship expert, and author of Choosing Marriage and True Love Dates. She's also the host of the hotline style Love + Relationships Podcast. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships.
We're talking about:
- Relationships have a natural “four-season” cycle that happens again and again.
- Healthy relationships start with healthy singles, so her book is meant for everyone, married, dating, or single.
- In the beginning or “Springtime” of a relationship, you can easily see if there’s a give and take or if you’re just giving, giving, giving.
- Summer is the season of intimacy and when we show a little bit more of ourselves.
- Fall is the season when your true colors start to show through. There can be conflict or compatibility issues, but the conflict is an invitation to a deeper connection.
- Winter is the season where things start to cool and become normal and comfortably mundane. However, that comfort can turn into apathy.
- Take Debra’s free quiz on her website to see what season your relationship might be in.
- Two seeds that need to be planted during Spring and Winter are the seeds of Friendship and Faith.
- Don’t be afraid of conflict! Use it as an opportunity to draw closer to your family.
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with John on his website, Instagram, or Facebook.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram or Facebook.
This week on Talk Therapy with Rachael, I'm bringing to you a simple therapeutic exercise you can use when you feel overwhelmed - it's a different kind of bucket list.
Take time to sit with the Lord and ask Him what is in your bucket that He has not given you the grace to carry.
Read more here
Matthew 11: 28-30, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
This week we’re talking with John Eldredge, who just published a new book, “Get Your Life Back: Everyday Practices for a World Gone Mad”. John Eldredge is a bestselling author, a counselor, and a teacher. He is also president of Ransomed Heart, a ministry devoted to helping people discover the heart of God, recover their own hearts in God’s love, and learn to live in God’s kingdom. John and his wife, Stasi, live near Colorado Springs, Colorado.
Today we're talking about:
- The more time you spend in technology the less time you have to spend with real people, real situations, and even God.
- John suggests shutting the phone off at 8 pm and not turning to it first thing in the morning when you get up.
- Set healthy boundaries for your children, no phones at mealtimes or at bedtime.
- Model the behavior you want to see in your children with social media.
- Download John’s One Minute Pause app to try it for yourself.
- Spend the first few minutes of your morning outside to refresh your soul.
- “Living in an hour like this requires a strong soul.”
- “You’re going to be okay because you’re going to be in love.”
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with John on his website, Instagram, or Facebook.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram or Facebook.
On this episode of Talk Therapy with Rachael we're talking about letting go and trusting that God will restore all we've lost.
What to Do When You Don't Want to Talk to God
Psalm 126:4, "Restore our fortunes, Lord, like streams in the Negev."
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re talking to Jennifer Allwood. Jennifer is a passionate cheerleader of women who adds Biblical truth to the modern-day “dream big” mantra. She’s the author of Fear Is Not the Boss of You: How to Get Out of Your Head and Live the Life You Were Made For and host of The Jennifer Allwood Show which holds a regular spot in the Top 25 Entrepreneurship Podcasts in the world with 1.5 million downloads.
Her no-nonsense approach to doing things you are scared to do and saying yes to God is helping women everywhere build the life and business of their dreams. When she’s not coaching her nearly 3,000 clients each month, she’s spending time with her husband Jason and their four children.
Today we're talking about:
- Knowing where your fear comes from can help you get to the next step of solving it.
- Spiritual resistance is common when dealing with fears, Jennifer’s book shows how to deal with that.
- “Imposter syndrome” often begins when you start a business.
- Who is teaching our kids how to be brave when they’re scared? It has to come down to the parents.
- You’re capable of being scared and doing it anyway. “I can do hard things and not die.”
- “Courage is being scared to death, but saddling up anyway.” John Wayne
- Courage is the new confidence
- “Courage says you may not know what you’re doing but you’ll try it anyway.”
Don’t forget to text the phrase “RealTalkGiveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Jennifer on her website, Instagram, or Facebook.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram or Facebook.
On this episode of Talk Therapy with Rachael we're talking about expanding our faith and trusting God.
Ephesians 3:20 MSG, "God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us."
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with Anne Beiler of Auntie Anne’s Pretzels. Anne Beiler began twisting pretzel in 1987 and grew a single farmer’s market stand into Auntie Anne’s Inc., the world’s largest hand-rolled soft pretzel franchise. Her professional success, however, was forged after years of darkness, depression, and despair brought on by the death of her nineteen-month-old daughter.
Anne’s personal story and entrepreneurial insights have been featured on many television shows including Secret Millionaire, The Oprah Winfrey Show, and Good Morning America. She has been highlighted in numerous publications such as Fortune Magazine, and Inc Magazine. In 2005, Anne sold Auntie Anne’s and authored the business memoir, Twist of Faith. Today, Anne speaks to audiences around the world inspiring people with her authentic stories and life experiences. Her mission is to help women overcome the pain, blame, and shame of their past by sharing their stories.
Today we're talking about:
- “Life is hard and God is good. No matter what happens to us, He is good.”
- Anne went to work making pretzels to support her husband’s vocation of free marriage counseling
- Jesus has a purpose in our pain
- God gave Anne something as simple as a pretzel and used it as a platform for her to share her testimony
- James 5:16 says, “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” (NIV) Learning this and practicing this in her life led her out of darkness
- Proverbs 6:5, “Free yourself, like a gazelle from the hand of the hunter, like a bird from the snare of the fowler.” (NIV)
- Confession is the highest form of communication
- Anne has discovered three types of confession - bedtime prayers, journaling our feelings and experiences to God and confessing one person to another
Connect with Anne on her website, Instagram or Facebook
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram or Facebook
On this episode of Talk Therapy with Rachael, we're talking about a subject near to my heart - overcoming fear. Please visit RachaelGilbert.com/overcomefear to get my 3 Action Steps to Overcome Fear Guide.
2 Timothy 1:7, "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind."
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking with the author and Bible teacher, Lisa Whittle. She is also the creator of a companion video Bible study for Jesus over Everything. A pastor's daughter and longtime ministry leader in issues relevant to the church, Lisa is the founder of Ministry Strong and the popular Jesus over Everything podcast, which debuted in the top twenty-five of Christian podcasts. Her love runs deep to see people pursue Jesus for life, grow deep roots of faith, and walk strong in the midst of a world that so often seems to have gone crazy.
Lisa has done master's work in marriage and family counseling, advocated for Compassion International, and been featured on numerous media outlets through the years. She and her husband live in North Carolina with their three mostly grown children, who still come home for dinner.
TODAY WE'RE TALKING ABOUT:
- The priority order of Jesus over everything is the key to making our life work in a lasting sense, not the things we think work for us but prove to be short-term solutions
- How her father ‘s role as a pastor affected her and her willingness to go into ministry
- Why she took a 1-year shopping fast
- Evaluating our "substitute saviors"
- The “land of the deadly overs:” where we overdo things in an effort to try to capture the life we want, but it winds up complicating it
- Real over pretty: "Real is the best pretty because it doesn’t ask you to lie."
- Honesty over Hiding: When we want to lie, we out the secret to take away its power
- Avoiding and identifying burnout
Don't forget to visit LisaWhittle.com/JOE to pre-order Jesus Over Everything and get some free goodies as well!
Connect with Lisa on her website, Instagram and/or Facebook
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook
On our first episode of Talk Therapy with Rachael, we're taking a few deep breaths and talking about anxiety.
1 Peter 5:7, "Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you."
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re talking with Trudy Cathy White, the daughter of Chick-fil-A founders S. Truett and Jeannette Cathy. Trudy recently released a book called A Quiet Strength: The Life and Legacy Jeannette M. Cathy, about the important behind the scenes role her mother plays in the Chick-fil-A institution to this day. Trudy is a native Georgian and is the co-founder of Lifeshape and Impact 360 Institute with her husband John. She is a speaker, author, and dedicated wife, along with being a mother to four children and grandmother of fifteen.
Today we're talking about:
- Remember that being a supportive partner in a marriage or business is very important. “Everything that is seen is the result of the unseen.”
- Prayer was at the center of their home life, with Jeannette often leading family prayers over their problems.
- Be careful of putting expectations on other people, especially unspoken expectations.
- Trudy’s mother was a life long learner and never stopped trying new things, including taking up painting at 65, getting her first computer at 80, and her first iPhone when she was 90!
- Her mother constantly reminded them of God’s love and providence over their lives, “Remember not only who you are, but whose you are.”
- “Days are long, but life is short.” Make the most of every opportunity you can.
- Her mother helped her understand that she could trust God, even when things were going poorly.
- Learning to never give up but to know when to quit is super important in business and in life.
You can see Trudy's interview on Fox & Friends here.
Enter to win a copy of the book for yourself head over to my Instagram to comment on the post for this episode with bonus points if you take a picture of yourself listening to the episode and tagging myself and Trudy!
Connect with Trudy on her website, Instagram or Facebook.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re talking with Beth McCord, founder of Your Enneagram Coach, who has been an Enneagram speaker, coach, and teacher for more than seventeen years. She has been trained by the best Enneagram experts and has obtained her advanced certification in Enneagram coaching. Beth is passionate about coming alongside individuals and helping them rewrite their story, allowing them to see that lasting change, meaningful relationships, and a life of deep purpose are possible. Beth lives outside of Nashville with her husband Jeff and two children.
Beth is the author of Becoming Us, a book about your marriage and the Enneagram, and the new Enneagram Journal Collection.
Today we’re talking about:
- Becoming an Enneagram coach through Beth’s course.
- How to find out what your Enneagram type
- Beth’s Discovering You
- How each type approaches conflict and how to navigate that using both your and their type.
- What each type’s childhood message was that they might have heard during trauma.
- Parenting with the Enneagram in mind.
Connect with Beth on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we’re talking with Dave Willis, who spent thirteen years as a full-time pastor and is now a speaker, author, relationship coach, and television host for MarriageToday. Dave and his wife Ashley have four young sons and live in Keller, Texas where they co-host a podcast together, The Naked Marriage. Today we talk about his new book, “Raising Boys Who Respect Girls” and get into the nitty-gritty of the challenges that parents raising boys face today.
Today we're talking about:
- “Whatever thoughts we allow to replay in our minds will eventually shape our actions.”
- You may not be able to control what thoughts come into your head, but like an air traffic controller, you can control which thoughts “land”
- “The talk” about the birds and the bees should really happen more than once as you engage with your children in age-appropriate ways about what their struggles and questions are
- Mom’s have a unique roll in their son’s life to be the first point of contact with what friendship and respect for a woman looks like
- The book deals with how to have conversations with your sons, whether you’re a married or single mother
- Jesus was the ultimate respecter of women
- True manhood is how they love, respect, and serve the people around them
Remember to use the code, “RealTalkRachael” in the Cultivate What Matters shop for 10% your purchases, now until March 31st!
Connect with Dave on his website, Instagram, or Facebook
Connect with Rachael on her website, Instagram or Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we’re talking with Lara Casey, CEO of Cultivate What Matters. Lara Casey is a mom to three (one through the gift of adoption), a grateful wife, and a believer in the impossible. As CEO of Cultivate What Matters, Lara is the creator of the best-selling PowerSheets Intentional Goal Planner, the Write the Word Bible journals, and she authored two books: Make it Happen and Cultivate. In her free time Lara and loves getting her hands dirty in the garden with her kiddos in Chapel Hill, North Carolina.
Today we're talking about:
- Lara’s first art print, “You Know All Those Things…”
- The PowerSheets that allowed her to focus on what mattered most to her
- How to live intentionally
- The trap of comparison
- Questions to ask yourself to make sure the goals you are choosing are the right things for this season in your life
- How to make sure your goals are rooted in good soil with 2020GoalSetting.com
- Lara’s podcast, “Cultivate Your Life”
Remember to use the code, “RealTalkRachael” in the Cultivate What Matters shop for 10% your purchases, now until March 31st!
And don’t forget to head over to my Instagram to enter to win a set of PowerSheets of your very own!
Connect with Lara at her website, Instagram, or Facebook
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram or Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we’re talking to Morgan Tyree, author of the book Take Back Your Time: Identify Your Priorities, Decrease Stress, and Increase Productivity. Morgan is a Professional Organizer, writer, and Fitness Instructor and she has a desire to help women be their best; to bless, encourage, and equip them in every season of life. She lives in Colorado with her husband, David, and their three children.
This week we're talking about:
- Identifying your own top purpose so you know how to spend your time
- All times of the day are not created equal
- How your most productive time of the day might be later or earlier than you think
- Morgan’s three-color system for organizing your time: green - highly focused productive time, yellow - less highly focused, tasks that can be easily started and stopped, red - free time and time to rest
Thank you to our sponsors, Cultivate What Matters, for sponsoring today’s podcast and remember to use the code: “RealTalkRachael” to save 10% at check out through March 31st!
Also, be sure to check out our special giveaway on Instagram for a chance to win a copy of the book and a gift card to Morgan’s favorite organization store!
Connect with Morgan on her website, Facebook, and Instagram
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael we’re celebrating the two year anniversary of this podcast! We’re also celebrating what God has done through it and looking back at our “small beginnings”.
Today we’re talking about:
- Our top three most downloaded episodes: Episode 27 - Claiming Victory in the Valleys of Life with Dr. Cindy Haggerton, Episode 4 - Real Talk on Anxiety & Expecting Blessings in the Midst of Difficult Seasons with Diana Burks and Episode 32 - Real Talk about Biblical Body Image
- “Do not despise small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin.” Zechariah 4:10
- People who despise small beginnings are easily discouraged and they discourage others.
- Five Things I’ve Learned from not despising small beginnings.
- Remember, there’s no “perfect time” to start anything! Start today with tiny steps.
Don’t forget to leave a review on iTunes, subscribe to the email list, comment on the Instagram post for this episode or share this episode on social media to enter for our 2-year anniversary giveaway! Get more details here. Thank you so much to our sponsors for the amazing gifts!
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I have the privilege of talking with Don Mann, a US Navy Veteran and member of SEAL Team Six and writer of 19 books, including his most recent book, Reaching Beyond Boundaries: A Navy SEAL's Guide to Achieving Everything You've Ever Imagined.
Today we're talking about:
- Doing something every day to make you smarter, faster, stronger and kinder
- How good teammates usually end up leading teams
- Don's thoughts on PTSD
- Developing a “combat mindset” by learning how to weed out distraction and focus on the mission
- Micro goals, macro goals, and how to balance them
Connect with Don on his website or Facebook
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I talk with Erin Porter, author of Eat Pray Get Well: A Journey from Chronic Illness, Brokenness & Junk Food Junkie to Wholeness & Wellness. This is not your Grandmother’s recipe book! In Eat Pray Get Well, Erin invites you into her journey from a childhood filled with rejection and emotional abuse to chronic illness into her adult years. She shares how God used both of these debilitating tragedies to reveal His grace, healing, and blessings in unimaginable ways. Eat pray get well is entertaining, inspiring and most of all will help you gain the tools needed to help heal your body and soul.
All recipes are free of gluten, yeast, wheat, peanuts, and corn.
Today we’re talking about:
- Erin’s delicious protein balls.
- How fungus may be the cause of some mystery illnesses.
- How Erin and her son both recovered from a habit of binge eating.
- Practical tips on how to deal with binge eating and anxiety.
- The difference between fear and anxiety.
- Sugar replacements for your food and desserts.
- Know the Cause by Doug Kaufmann
Text the phrase “Real Talk Giveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Erin on her website, Instagram, or Facebook page.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
Today on Real Talk with Rachael, I’m talking with Alisa Keeton, author of the book The Wellness Revelation: Lose What Weighs You Down So You Can Love, God, Yourself, and Others. Alisa Keeton is a leading certified wellness professional with more than 20 years of experience. She is passionately dedicated to serving the Lord and is the founder of Revelation Wellness, a nonprofit ministry dedicated to educating and inspiring people to live healthy and whole lives in Christ.
To date, she and her team have trained up and sent out into the world over one thousand wellness professionals who carry the message of what it means to love God, get healthy, be whole and love others. Her book, The Wellness Revelation: Lose What Weighs You Down So You Can Love, God, Yourself, and Others takes an in-depth look at what it means to be transformed by God’s love, from the inside-out.
Today we’re talking about:
- How to “discharge” and sweat away our stress with God at the center.
- What makes Revelation Wellness different from any other fitness program.
- How mothers influence their daughter’s self-image and eating habits.
- How to recognize your idols and how to “slay” them.
- Alisa’s favorite breathing prayer, “Inhale grace, exhale praise.”
- How to stay hopeful when your influence is small, but humble when it enlarges.
- Learn how to “Say it, think it, and move your body,” with the Revelation Wellness Podcast.
Plus: Don’t forget to head to rachaelgilbert.com/hopewriters to take our writer’s quiz!
Text the phrase “Real Talk Giveaway” to the number 44222 to be entered to win giveaways from show guests and sponsors!
Connect with Alisa at her website, Instagram, or Facebook.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I’m talking with Gwen Smith - a popular conference speaker, author, worship leader, coach, podcaster and volleyball enthusiast who lives in sunny North Carolina and has been married to her hunky college honey, Brad, for 26 years. They are tired parents to three tall young adults who keep them on their toes and on their knees.
Her online friends meet at GwenSmith.net where she helps women know and trust God more. Her popular podcast, GRACEOLOGIE with Gwen Smith, has fun, faith-focused, grace-filled interview-style conversations with practical tips and honest discussions to encourage women in meaningful ways to live out and lean on the grace of Jesus in the midst of cluttered, messy days.
Today we're talking about:
- Managing our online time and prayer time with less distraction by using a notepad to jot down distracting thoughts during prayer time and changing your browser homepage to a blank webpage to avoid being bombarded by entertainment and news.
- How to get to know God in whatever season you’re currently in.
- How Gwen helps women grow in faith beyond their “feelings, failures, and fears” through K.N.E.E.E.L - Know Him, Notify (your heart, your enemy, and your girlfriends), Express the Mess, Exchange Your Will for His, Expand your Heart in Worship, Learn the Word.
- Gwen’s latest book, I Want It All: Exchanging Your Average Life for Deeper Faith, Greater Power, and More Impact.
- Gwen’s previous books: Broken into Beautiful: How God Restores the Wounded Heart, Trusting God: A Girlfriends in God Faith Adventure and Knowing God by Name: A Girlfriends in God Faith Adventure
- Gwen’s inductive Bible studies.
Plus: Don’t forget to head to rachaelgilbert.com/hopewriters to take our writer’s quiz!
Connect with Gwen on her website, Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter. Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
Welcome to 2020! This week on Real Talk with Rachael I'm talking about the condition of our hearts. Did you know that the NLT version of the Bible mentions the heart 565 times? It's very important to God and just might be your secret to success in the new year.
TODAY WE’RE TALKING ABOUT: * what God is showing me about my own heart condition * why your heart is so important to God * a few things that the Bible tells us about our hearts and our relationship with God * three steps for spiritual open-heart surgery * the secret to your success
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
Hey friends! Welcome back to Real Talk with Rachael. Today I am pulling back the curtains on my own life and getting real about a struggle I’ve had in my own life that God is convicting and correcting me - my Instagram addiction.
I also want to share some really exciting news - starting January 8, 2020, this show will be delivered to you weekly! You can expect a new episode every Wednesday morning to help you not just survive but thrive through your week.
Today we're talking about:
- Four convictions and corrections to demolish shame and bring our sin into the light.
- Cognitive-behavioral therapy for overcoming addiction
- Defining triggers and how to manage them
Download the free worksheet that goes with this episode here!
We will be taking a break from the show over the holidays so I can spend time with family and prepare for the launch of weekly episodes in 2020. I pray you all have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I talk with Asheritah Ciuciu, who is a bestselling author and speaker, wife to her high school sweetheart Flaviu, and mama to three spunky kiddos. She grew up in Romania as a missionary kid and studied English and Women’s Ministry at Cedarville University. She is the founder of One Thing Alone Ministries, an online ministry that helps overwhelmed women find joy in Jesus through creative and consistent time in God’s Word.
Visit BibleandBreakfast.com for resources about the book, including the free lock screens discussed during the episode!
Today we talked about:
- Free lock screens for your phone at Bibleandbreakfast.com
- Snacking on scripture and feasting on God’s word
- Getting over all-or-nothing thinking
- What holds women back from taking quiet time and getting into God’s word
- How you can be creative about being consistent
- The key to forming good habits
Moody is giving away THREE copies of Bible & Breakfast!
Enter either of these ways:
Leave an iTunes review on the show!Text the phrase REALTALKGIVEAWAY to 44222 on your phone!
You can enter both ways and that gets you more entries!
Connect with Asheritah on her website and/or Instagram.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, we talk with Tricia Goyer, author of the brand new book, “The Grumble Free Year: Twelve Months, Eleven Family Members, and One Impossible Goal”. Tricia Goyer is a busy mom of ten, doting grandma, and wife to John. A USA Today bestselling author, Tricia has published seventy books and is a two-time Carol Award winner, as well as a Christy and ECPA Award Finalist. She won the Retailer’' Best Award in 2015 and has received starred reviews from Romantic Times and Publishers Weekly. She is also on the blogging team at TheBetterMom.com and other homeschooling and Christian sites. Tricia is the founder of Hope Pregnancy Ministries and currently leads a Teen MOPS Group in Little Rock, Arkansas.
After adopting her children, she noticed that there was a lot of grumbling as everyone adjusted to one another. Adopting so many at once was a lot to handle for anybody! “The Grumble Free Year” seeks to help you get your own family grumble free, with the benefit of her experience in seeing what worked, and what didn’t.
Today we talked about:
- How grumbling is so much more than just a bad attitude, it’s a matter of the heart.
- The Emotionally Healthy Woman: Eight Things You Have to Quit to Change Your Life by Geri Scazzero
- Reworking our brain to get out of our slump.
- Transforming grumbling into praying.
- And how to avoid blowing up during what Tricia calls our “Witching Hour”.
- Plus, the Grumble Free 30-Day Challenge starting after Thanksgiving!
Connect with Trica Goyer at her website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I’m talking with Bonnie Hirst, who shares with us her story of heartbreak and faith in her new book, “Test of Faith: Surviving My Daughter’s Life Sentence”. I cried during this book, which is not something I do often. After attending a writing workshop, the pain that she went through eventually evolved into her book as she poured all of her experiences out onto the page. She credits that with being a major turning point in her life.
Today we talked about:
- How writing the book helped pull her out of her deep depression.
- How she keeps in touch with her daughter now.
- How she recognized the blessings that had come into her life, even though her daughter was still in jail, through writing her book.
- Now that it’s been 10 years since her daughter was arrested, we discussed how she’s dealing with it now a decade after her life drastically changed.
- How she dealt with her faith being shaken after her prayer was not favorably answered...
- ...and how to help a family member or friend during their times of grief.
Bonnie S. Hirst loves feel-good movies and stories with happy endings. When life tries to shorten her stride, she prays, cries, talks with her guardian angels, reads self-help books, and writes. She can often be found kayaking on a calm mountain lake.
If you want to win a copy of Bonnie’s memoir, text the phrase REALTALKGIVEAWAY to 44222. This does not add your cell phone or email to any newsletter; it’s just an easy way to keep track of entries! And once you enter once, you are entered for ALL future giveaways!
Send a note to Bonnie's daughter here:
Lacey Hirst-Pavek
WCCW 345340 MSU
9601 Bujacich Rd
Gig Harbor, WA 98332
For important guidelines on how to send gifts to your incarcerated loved ones, or on how to send gifts to Lacey, please see this helpful page from PrisonPro: Sending Books, Letters, and Photos to an Inmate: Important rules you need to know.
Connect with Bonnie S. Hirst on her website, Facebook and/or Instagram.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week on Real Talk with Rachael, I’m talking with Julia Sadler, who recently released her exciting new book, “Pray Big Things: The Surprising Life God Has for You When You’re Bold Enough to Ask”. After three miscarriages, Julia, along with her husband, decided to pray boldly and very specifically to change the course of their lives. After going through that experience, she wants to share with the rest of us how we can access that power through prayer and what the Bible says about prayer itself so we can pray boldly into our own lives.
We also get into the big topic of how to deal with our grief when God says "No" to your big prayers. She discusses how to go to Him with your feelings honestly and how not to be afraid to share your heartbreak, and even anger, with God. She provides a great biblical reminder to us that we can feel hope after grief.
Julia Sadler, LPC, is a reality star from TLC's “Rattled” who has seen God do immeasurably more than anything she could hope or imagine. After suffering three miscarriages in one year, God blessed her and her husband, Ryan, with triplets. Their story of faith, prayer, and evangelism in the midst of heartache has encouraged thousands around the world. Julia is a licensed professional counselor and the girls ministry director at the 13,000-member First Baptist Church of Dallas, Texas. She is a regular conference speaker, radio show guest, and host of The Julia Sadler Show. Her clinical training, biblical foundation, pastor's daughter upbringing, and sense of humor provide a fresh perspective on cultural topics. Julia and her junior-high sweetheart, Ryan, live and minister in Dallas, Texas.
Connect with Julia Jeffress Sadler on her website, Instagram, and Facebook.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This is a bonus episode of Real Talk with Rachael because our parents celebrate fifty years of marriage today! I hopped on a call with my four older siblings and we discussed what we each learned from mom and dad- hence the five things- one from each kid!
We also had some fun banter about life in a family of seven, particularly family vacations.
Here are just a few things mentioned that we learned from mom and dad:
- Faith is the foundation
- Teamwork makes the dream work.
- Love Jesus, love others.
- Unconditional love from God, for each other, for us kids and for others.
If you would like to donate to their Israel trip click here.
If you would like to learn more and donate to the amphitheater click here.
If you would like to learn more and donate to the Oasis animal therapy program, click here.
We love you, mom and dad!
Emily Jensen and Laura Wifler spend some time talking about their ministry to give mother’s hope this week. They are sisters-in-law that discovered they had the same questions about how being Christian should affect their approach to motherhood and wanted to explore that topic together on a podcast called Risen Motherhood. On their podcast, they talk about the difficulties of motherhood on a spiritual level, talk about tough topics, all with an aim to give hope to mothers and help refocus their calling to motherhood through the lens of the gospel.
We chatted about all that, plus:
- How being a Christian should change your perspective on motherhood.
- Their new book: Risen Motherhood: Gospel Hope for Everyday Moments.
- What it was like starting a podcast and how they became comfortable with it.
- Trusting God to go out on a limb and do something uncomfortable and new.
- How balancing being a wife, mother, and working requires constant
- Being seen as amazing because of how much you love Jesus, rather than how quickly you can fit back into your pre-baby jeans.
Connect with Emily and Laura on their website, Instagram and Facebook.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
We got real about friendship with these week's guest, Kelly Needham.
Kelly Needham is an author, speaker, and blogger and hopes to convince as many people as possible that nothing compares to knowing Jesus.
Here are some things we covered in this episode:
- Why Kelly wrote Friendish.
- The one message Kelly would want readers to take away from the book.
- In a world where women are busier than ever, what it looks like to be a good friend.
- The most common counterfeits masquerading as good friendship.
- What foundational truths readers/listeners need to know in order to have healthy relationships.
- What communication skills have been the most life-changing in moving towards real friendship.
- The importance of carefrontation in friendship.
Kelly's publishers are giving away TWO copies of Friendish! One for you...and one for a friend! To enter, text the phrase REALTALK to 44222.
Connect with Kelly on her website, Instagram, and Facebook.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
Today’s guest, Brian Dixon is the author of Start with Your People: The Daily Decision that Changes Everything. He has a doctoral degree in education from the University of San Diego. He has consulted with universities, publishers, nonprofits, and hundreds of coaching students to help them clarify their message and serve their ideal audience. As a podcaster, conference speaker and consultant, Brian is passionate about helping high performers thrive in a world of overwhelming options.
Brian is the second man I’ve had on Real Talk with Rachael (the first being my husband) and I invited him on because I have been very impressed with not only his online presence but how he truly does lead with people first. He is genuine and authentic, and we did some real talk about all kind of fun topics today, like:
- What made him change how he was doing things in life and business years ago (his answer was so vulnerable!).
- The power of the 360 assessment (and what it is)
- 3 tips for working from home without sacrificing your family or business
- How to figure out what is obvious to you that can help other people
- His wife's role in his online business
- Why more men aren’t in the online space (this conversation was rich!)
- And so much more wisdom and insight you don't want to miss!
Special thank you to today’s show sponsor, Hope Writers, a community for writers that I am a part of each month. I love their teachings, encouragement and community. Brian is a co-founder of Hope Writers and he shared about a quiz you can take to figure out where you are on your writing journey. Go to rachaelgilbert.com/hopewriters to take the quiz!
Connect with Brian on his website and Instagram.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
Join us today on Real Talk with Rachael as I interview special guest, Malinda Fuller.
Malinda Fuller s an acclaimed author, speaker, and blogger that desires to inspire her readers to choose obedience over hustle. And that is exactly what we chatted about today plus all of this awesomeness:
- The FUN adventure her family is taking in this season of life.
- Her book: Obedience Over Hustle: The Surrender of the Striving Heart.
- What's so wrong with this hustle culture.
- How hustling differs from just having a good work ethic
- What we have to lose if we give ourselves over to the "hustle" way of doing things
- How the hustle culture lifestyle differs from the way Jesus lived
Be sure to text REALTALK to 44222 to stay up to date via email all things regarding the show and goodies from sponsors!
Special thanks to Cultivate What Matters for being today's show sponsor. Click HERE to shop and support the show! Be sure to use code RealTalkRachael for 10% off your order!
Connect with Melinda on her website, Instagram and Facebook.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
Join Rachael this week on Real Talk with Rachael as she shares 3 truths about personal convictions in a public world. {And why it's so important we recognize the power of our personal convictions}.
Special thank you to Loved & Blessed box for being today's show sponsor. Click HERE to grab your box and use code REALTALK5 for $5 off your first box!
To stay up to date on the Real Talk with Rachael show and special offers from sponsors, text realtalk to 44222 on your cellphone.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
Join the conversation this week on Real Talk with Rachael as I chat with special guest, Ashley Willis.
Ashley Willis is the author and co-author of seven books and scores of viral blog articles on issues related to faith, mental health, motherhood, and marriage. Along with her husband Dave, she co-hosts the popular Naked Marriage Podcast and MarriageToday TV program. Ashley's resources have provided encouragement, hope and practical instruction to millions around the world. Ashley and Dave live with their four amazing sons and their spoiled dog "Chi Chi" in Keller, Texas.
In today’s show, Ashley and I got real about what a naked marriage really looks like as well as her story of overcoming anxiety and her advice and resources she recommends to anyone walking through anxiety.
Here are a few of things we chatted about: * What transparency and intimacy in marriage really looks like * What is a naked marriage? * Her struggle with anxiety and her journey of overcoming it (plus her favorite resources on this topic) * The most downloaded podcast topic on their podcast, The Naked Marriage (Warning: the results might shock you!) * And much more #realtalk goodness you don't want to miss!
To enter to WIN a copy of The Naked Marriage book simply text the phrase NAKEDMARRIAGE to the number 44222.
For additional resources and to connect with Ashley please visit www.AshleyWillis.org
Buy the book she recommended: 31 Verses and Prayers for the Anxious Heart and Mind
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
I only thought we were done with this Biblical Body Image series...until I had quite the experience at a bra store that left me with a story too good not to share!
Join me as I share 4 life lessons learned from a bra store!
Text the phrase REALTALK to 44222 to be added to the future email list for the release of body image resources.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
We just wrapped up our 4 part series on Biblical body image here on Real Talk with Rachael. I thought it would be fun to bring a guest on the show to have an off the wall discussion about body image.
Kristen Ekiss is a speaker, educator, Veteran, and coach. She gracefully merges her Biblical counseling training and 15 years of health and fitness experience to inspire and educate women on how to make simple choices that create life-changing transformation. Her mission with this ministry is to encourage women to grow stronger together in Christ. She accomplishes this by creating content that teaches women how grow a stronger faith, raise a stronger family, and build a stronger body.
Here are a few things we chatted about on the show:
- The biggest body image struggle she had to overcome (her answer might surprise you)
- What body image IS and what it IS NOT.
- The shocking results from a body image survey she sent out to thousands of women
- Why she wishes she had stretch marks and a less than perfect stomach (her answer might convict you like it did me).
- What she would say to a woman listening who is struggling to accept her body.
- and so much more that is too good to write out...just listen!
Kristen is giving away 3 copies of her "Eating With Biblical Intention" courses (a $49 value!). To enter:
- Leave a review for the show on iTunes
- Enter on the Instagram post for this show!
Connect with Kristen on her website, Facebook or Instagram. Be sure to visit this page to find the freebies she has especially for Real Talk with Rachael listeners: www.kristenekiss.com/realtalk
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week we dive into our final part of our Biblical Body Image series. If you missed the first 3 episodes in this series click HERE for part one and HERE for part two and HERE for part three.
Today we are chatting about simple steps to have a strong body. This is not going to be rocket science. These are principles you can apply immediately with no tricks, gadgets or gimmicks!
Here are a few of the resources mentioned in the show I recommend:
- Renewed: 21 Day Faith & Fitness Plan
- Revelation Wellness
- Faster Way to Fat Loss
- The Back & Body Clinic
Don't forget to share this series with a friend and leave those iTunes review!
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This week we dive into part 3 of our Biblical Body Image series. If you missed the first 2 episodes in this series click HERE for part one and HERE for part two.
Today we are chatting about the power of a submitted heart and a sound mind when it comes to having a Biblical body image.
Don't forget to share this series with a friend and leave those iTunes review!
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
This is part 2 of Real Talk about Biblical Body Image. In this week's episode, we dive into 5 reasons I believe we struggle with body image issues.
Don't miss the next episode with 2 of the 3 ways we can live healthy with God at the center!
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
Don't forget to leave those iTunes reviews!
It's been 20 years since I started personally struggling with body image and eating disorders so I thought it was time to share what I've learned with you all.
Here are a few things we chat about in this episode:
- My story & testimony
- 3 biblical truths about body image
- 3 tips to overcome
- Plus more on a summer series on this very topic
Here are the questions I left for you to ponder at the end:
- Is there an area of your temple that you have built an idol? Or not taken care of it at all?
- Why are you here? How is your obsession or neglect of your temple keeping you from that?
- What area is God asking you to give the first of yourself to him? Exercise, eating, reading his word, or some other area?
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook
Do you desire to have a healthy and restored relationship with your mother or daughter? If so, this week's episode of Real Talk with Rachael is one you don't want to miss.
I invited Blythe Daniel (the literary agent) & her mother Helen McIntosh (the counselor) on the show to talk about their new book, "Mended: Restoring the hearts of mothers & daughters".
This episode was full of nuggets of wisdom so if you are able I would recommend keeping a notebook nearby to jot down notes.
Here are a few things we chatted about:
- How the idea for the book "Mended" came about.
- Blythe & Helen's mother/daughter relationship
- What it really means to restore and practical steps to put it in action.
- What we are (and aren't) responsible for in relationships and a powerful visual illustration to remember it.
- How Helen broke generational patterns between her mother and her daughter
- How to value the relationship over the problem
- Words of hope for someone who may have given up on their mother/daughter relationship
- And a few bonus questions from some of our listeners!
They are giving away TWO copies of their book "Mended". You can enter two ways:
- The first way is to leave an iTunes review for the show in the month of May. At the end of the month, we will use a super fancy tool, aka my kids, to pick a random winner! :)
- The second way is over on Instagram @rachaeljgilbert There will be a post there that you can comment on and share to be entered to win.
Thank you for those reviews and feedback on the show. It encourages me as well as gets these episodes into the ears of more listeners just like you!
You can find Blythe online at www.theblythedanielagency.com and learn more about their book at www.ourmendedhearts.com.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
Are you thinking of quitting a dream, job, ministry, or relationship? If so, listen to this first, then you can decide if you want to quit.
Here are the 4 things we discuss but listen in to hear them described:
- Rest
- Reevaluate
- Realign
- Rend
I would LOVE to hear from you after this episode! Please share on social media, leave an iTunes review and/or leave a comment on the blog!
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook
Today’s guest, Dannah Gresh, is an author of countless books, founder of Secret Keeper Girl, and is a freedom fighter who is making an impact that is causing a ripple effect in many households, including my own.
Dannah holds a special place in my heart because it was through my encounter with her at a women’s retreat that God began a healing work in my heart.
As I chatted with Dannah, I got real about a secret sin in my life that God convicted me of and I confessed to my husband. We also chatted about lies many girls and women believe and the truth that sets them free. Today’s episode might be one of the most vulnerable ones I’ve released so lean into the hard places and let God speak to you. I promise it will be worth it.
Here are a few things we chatted about on the show:
- How her ministry, Secret Keeper Girl (now True Girl) got started
- How we met & the powerful exercise she led me through that brought freedom into my life and marriage
- Real talk about how God used her to bring a secret sin of mine into the light
- What Dannah wishes more girls and women knew about themselves
- The most common lie women and young girls believe
- And many nuggets of truth along the way!
If this episode blesses you, please consider leaving an Apple podcasts (formerly iTunes) review and sharing on social media!
Follow Dannah on Instagram here.
Follow Secret Keeper Girl
Apply for the Masterclass we discussed in the episode here.
Connect with Rachael on the website, Instagram and/or Facebook.
You might recognize this week's guest, Melissa Hinnant, from Shark Tank when she landed a deal with Barbara for her business, Grace & Lace.
Melissa's story is one of redemption as she allowed God to turn her tragedy into a triumph that is blessing not only her family but 70 plus employees as well as thousands of customers daily!
Here are a few things we chatted about: * How Grace & Lace was birthed out of the tragic loss of her first daughter * How she encourages others to not waste their pain. * The mission of Grace & Lace * Why she calls Grace & Lace her "accidental company" * Her experience on Shark Tank * What it's like working with Barbara * How she "balances" being a wife, mom and business owner * Her greatest fear as a business owner and how she overcomes it.
Melissa was so kind as to offer Real Talk with Rachael listeners a special code to shop at www.graceandlace.com.
Use code GALRG19 for 15% off!
It's one-time use and expires 4/10. (some exclusions may apply)
To share your thoughts:
- Leave a note in the comment section on the website.
- Share this show on Facebook or Instagram.
To help out the show:
- Leave an honest review on iTunes. Your ratings and reviews really help and I read each one.
- Subscribe to our list and on iTunes.
Have you ever encountered a valley in life? Valleys are generally low points that we never anticipated or saw coming. On this week's episode of Real Talk with Rachael, Dr. Cindy Haggerton shared about the valleys of infidelity and infant loss that she and her husband, Dr. JimBob walked through in their life.
This was a very real and vulnerable episode that will bless every single person who listens. Here are a few things we chatted about:
- Their infidelity story and how God has totally redeemed it.
- Their infant loss story and the emotions and grief process that followed.
- Practical tips for someone going through a valley.
- The root of their issues when their marriage almost came crashing down.
- Why they decided to stay and fight for their family and hope for those who are deciding whether to stay and fight.
- The one question a counselor asked them when they decided to reconcile their marriage that made it possible for them to go all in.
- Disappointment with the Lord.
Prepare to have your heart blessed as you listen to Dr. Cindy tell their story.
We will have both Dr. Cindy & Dr. Jim Bob back on the show to discuss their valley of an injury they weren't expecting and how they have walked through that victoriously. Both of them are a wealth of knowledge when it comes to health and wellness so be sure to follow them on social media.
Go follow them on Instagram here:
Dr. Cindy
Dr. Jim Bob
As mentioned on the show, we are giving $25 cash back on any YoungLiving starter kits ordered for the next month. Simply click the link below to order then send an email to rachael@rachaelgilbert.com to get your $25 rebate.
Essential Oils starter kit here!
Connect with me on Instagram here or on my website here.
Have you ever wanted to peek behind the scenes at a husband and wife who pursue different dreams but somehow they do it as a team? That's exactly what we discuss with my husband this week on Real Talk with Rachael.
Here are a few things we talk about: * How owning a business has shaped us and our marriage * What my husband saw in the shy, timid Rachael when we first met in college and why he has encouraged me to go for my dreams * Insecurities I've had to overcome and how Matt has helped me push pass them and walk in confidence. * My body image struggles and the one thing Matt said to me years ago that shifted how I view myself. * What most men wish their wives knew about their body. * Matt's biggest struggle and how I helped him overcome it. * A word of encouragement on pursuing your dreams as a team * Matt's salvation story (hint: he got saved at Vacation Bible School at the age of 19!) * A word from Matt to the women who may not have saved or supportive husbands.
Even if you aren't married this episode is full of wisdom that you can use in your life as your overcome obstacles that arise as you step out in obedience to pursue your dreams.
We would love to hear from you after you listen. Be sure to connect with Rachael here:
www.instagram.com/rachaeljgilbert
www.facebook.com/rachaeljoygilbert
www.rachaelgilbert.com
We are praying blessings over your marriage!
Hey friends,
Can you believe it has been one year this month since I launched the Real Talk with Rachael podcast?! I am humbled and grateful for each one of you who have listened and supported the show in some way. I couldn't do it without you.
In honor of it being the show's one year anniversary, I decided to do episode 25 solo and share 7 things I've learned from starting a new venture. I believe this episode is going to bless any of you who have it on your heart to start something new (and possibly scary) this year.
Here are the 7 things I discuss but be sure to listen to the full episode to hear me elaborate on each point:
- HAVE A WORD(SCRIPTURE) OR MOMENT FROM GOD TO STAND ON FOR THE DAYS YOU WANT TO QUIT.
- DON’T EXPECT YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY TO BE YOUR BIGGEST SUPPORTERS.
- KEEP YOUR EYES ON YOUR MARCHING ORDERS AND BE CAREFUL OF COMPARING YOUR JOURNEY TO THOSE AROUND YOU.
- IT’S HARDER THAN IT LOOKS AND WILL TAKE MORE ENERGY AND TIME THAT YOU ANTICiPATED. CHEER OTHERS ON IN THEIR JOURNEY. PRACTICALLY FOR PODCAST LISTENERS, IF AN EPISODE BLESSES YOU, LEAVE AN ITUNES REVIEW OR SHARE IT ON SOCIAL MEDIA. THOSE POSTS BLESS OUR SOCKS OFF AND MAKE OUR DAY.
- OUTSOURCE YOUR WEAKNESSES NOT YOUR BLIND SPOTS.
- NOTHING IS WASTED.
- SUCCESS IS OBEDIENCE.
I also announced that registration for The Intentional Influencer™ course is now open for two weeks ONLY!
Click here to learn more and reserve your seat.
Excited to do this next "new thing" with you all!
This week's episode of Real Talk with Rachael was so anointed! Both Lauren and I had to overcome obstacles to get the interview recorded and we chased a few rabbit trails but they were so worth it!
Lauren Gaskill is the author of "Into the Deep: Diving Into a Life of Courageous Faith" and the founder of She Found Joy.
Here are a few things we chatted about: * What living a life of courageous faith looks like to Lauren * Lauren's biggest hurdle in her faith journey * A time when Lauren was called to take a risk and how she did it with courage * How to listen for the still, small voice of God in a noisy world * Being inspired by Biblical heroes * Recognizing and overcoming our deepest fears * How to use prayer to impact your decision-making process
Connect with Lauren: http://www.laurengaskillinspires.com/
http://instagram.com/lauren_inspires
http://facebook.com/lauren.gaskill.inspires/
For more information about The Intentional Influencers course, click here: The Intentional Influencer Waiting List
Connect with Rachael: http://www.instagram.com/rachaeljgilbert
http://facebook.com/rachaeljoygilbert
http://www.rachaelgilbert.com/
I'm excited for the first episode of 2019 to be with special guest, Dana K. White of A Slob Comes Clean.
Dana K. White is an author, podcaster, speaker, and (much to her own surprise) a Decluttering Expert. She taught both English and Theatre Arts before leaving her job to make her family her life's work. In an attempt to get her home under control, Dana started blogging as "Nony" (short for anonymous) at A Slob Comes Clean. Dana soon realized she was not alone in her housekeeping struggles and in her feelings of shame. Today, Dana shares realistic home management strategies and a message of hope for the hopelessly messy through her blog, weekly podcasts, and videos. Dana lives with her husband and three kids just outside of Dallas, Texas.
Oh, and she’s funny.
I know many of our New Year's resolutions include getting our home in order and Dana shares many practical tips on this week's episode.
Here are a few things we chatted about:
- How Dana got started online with her undercover name, A Slob Comes Clean
- The definition of decluttering
- The biggest hurdle Dana had to jump over to begin decluttering her own home
- How letting others into her struggle helped her on the decluttering journey
- How clutter struggles affect identity in women
- Practical tips to implement now
- The container concept
- Tips on managing laundry day
- How to stay on top of decluttering daily
- How to declutter when you have emotional ties to objects
Dana just launched a course called the 5 Day Clutter Shakedown. It is on sale this month only for $25 (normally $40) using code NEWYEAR19. Grab it here!
You can connect with Dana on her website, Instagram, & Facebook as a Slob Comes Clean. Get your copy of her books wherever books are sold:
Decluttering at the Speed of Life!
How to Manage Your Home Without Losing Your Mind
A special thank you to our show sponsor, Cultivate What Matters. For the month of January only, use code realtalkrachael for 10% off one order! Shop here!
In honor of Christmas and the holidays, I've asked my professor, Dr. Cassie Reid, back on the show to talk about holiday sanity when it comes to our relationships. You may remember Dr. Reid from episode 6 when we chatted about anxiety and mother wounds. She is a wealth of knowledge and both times I interviewed her I had my own therapy session!
Dr. Reid recently wrote a book called "Unwrapped: Open the Gift of Holiday Sanity". I highly recommend this book for every single person. You can buy it on Amazon here: Unwrapped: Open the Gift of Holiday Sanity
Here are a few things Dr. Reid & I chatted about:
- Disappointment and how to lean into those emotions rather than press past them
- Assumptions and how we can overcome the tendency to make them
- Boundaries: why they are important and how to properly set them
- What to do when our urge to control becomes uncontrollable.
- Expectations: how & why to communicate them
- How we can support marriage within families during the holidays
- Grief: how to process yet still enjoy the holidays
- How to deal with favoritism
- The root cause of many of these issues
- Why Dr. Reid doesn't like the word "why".
- Plus a few listener questions! Thank you for those...please follow me on Instagram if you want to submit those for the show.
I mentioned this is in the show, but don't forget this will be the only episode in December since I am taking some time off with family AND working on new resources for you all. HINT: it's the first online course I will offer and I am beyond excited to share it with you!
Keeping things real,
Rachael Joy
Hey friends,
This week's show on Real Talk with Rachael is another special edition episode. It's longer than most of the episodes but I promise it is worth every single minute.
November is suicide awareness month and my brave, strong friend, Lynn Paljarvi, came on the show to discuss suicide from a survivors perspective.
Here are just a few things we chatted about:
- How Lynn and I met just months after she lost her husband to suicide
- The ministry God brought into her life that carried her through this tough season
- The different emotional stages she went through after losing her husband
- The spiritual warfare during this dark season and how she continues to fight it
- What she would say to someone who is a recent suicide survivor
- What she would say to someone considering suicide (this answer she gave was POWERFUL)
- What the healing journey has looked like for her
- Practical ways we can support suicide survivors
- The verse she stood on to carry her through
- Why it's important to look a suicide survivor in the eyes (hint: shame comes for them hard)
- How she is still struggling today and what her friends do to lift her up
Have I said yet this is an episode you don't want to miss?!
I personally lost a friend to suicide just a few weeks ago so I am passionate about bringing this topic into the light. Please share this episode with everyone you know!
Keeping things real,
Rachael Joy
Connect with Lynn
Connect with Rachael
Hey, friends!
You are going to love this week's guest on Real Talk with Rachael!
Holley Gerth is a Wall Street Journal bestselling author, certified life coach, and speaker. She loves connecting with the hearts of women through her popular blog and books like You're Already Amazing and Fiercehearted. She's also co-founder of (in)courage and a partner with DaySpring.
A few things we chatted about:
- The heart and story behind her most recent book, "Hope Your Heart Needs: 52 Encouraging Reminders of How God cares for you".
- Her thoughts on "I'm fine".
- What real talk means to her.
- How having a soft heart in a hard world is courage not weakness
- How we can be a safe place for real talk to happen
- The opposite of real talk
- A personal lie she struggles to believe and how she gets real with a trusted friend to overcome that lie.
SPECIAL THANK YOU to Dayspring for giving away a $100 shopping spree to one lucky listener! To enter, head to iTunes and leave a review. If you've already done that, head to Instagram to enter as well.
You can connect with Holley:
www.holleygerth.com
Hey friends,
Join me for this special edition episode of Real Talk with Rachael as I interview my sister, Becky Fields.
Becky is a breast cancer survivor who fearlessly shared the good, bad and everything in between of her story. I feel this episode should be listened to by every single person to have a better understanding of walking through or alongside someone with cancer.
A few things we chatted about:
- The hardest part of discovering she had breast cancer
- How she learned not to compare her journey to others
- Body image and confidence issues that arise
- practical tips for self-care before, during and after cancer
- practical tips to love on someone walking through cancer
Special thank you to our show sponsor, Brave Watch Collection. I adore their Brave Watch and 10% of all sales are donated to raise breast cancer awareness. You can shop all the products HERE and use code Rachael15 for 15% off your order.
Connect with Becky:
Becky's website
Becky on Instagram
Becky on Facebook
Connect with Rachael:
This week's Real Talk with Rachael episode is with my long time friend, Kendra Hunt. Kendra and I share a very similar story in how we got started doing what we are doing today...a simple yes.
Here are a few things we chatted about:
- How God used fitness to call us both into ministry
- How she unknowingly wrote her book "Encouragement Between Loads of Laundry"
- How she got started writing and now teaches other women how to write
- The power of a simple yes
I wish you could have been a fly on the wall for this conversation because we giggled so much.
You can find Kendra here:
www.kendraannewithane.com
Head over to Instagram to WIN a copy of her book:
Connect with Rachael here:
www.rachaelgilbert.com
Be sure to leave an iTunes review and/or let us know what God speaks to you through this episode!
Xoxo,
Rachael Joy
P.S. Special thank you to today's show sponsor, Glory Active! Right now my listeners can get $10 off your first order of $25 or more on gloryactive.com when you use code FIRSTORDER10. I live in their slouchy tees, tanks, and capris so I’m excited for you to give them a try at gloryactive.com !
I brought Mary DeMuth on the show this week to have some #realtalk about friendships.
Mary DeMuth is an international speaker and podcaster, and she’s the novelist and nonfiction author of over thirty-five books, including the latest: The Seven Deadly Friendships. She loves to help people re-story their lives. She lives in Texas with her husband of 28 years and is the mom to three adult children. Find out more at marydemuth.com and follow her on Instagram @MaryDeMuth and Facebook.
Mary and I chatted about her new book, The Seven Deadly Friendships, and of course, got real about our own friendship struggles. This is an episode you are going to want to make sure to carve out some time to listen.
We are giving away TWO copies of Mary's new book The Seven Deadly Friendships. Enter on Facebook & Instagram!
Thank you to all who have left iTunes reviews, I truly appreciate them!
Special thank you to today's show sponsor, Glory Active!
*Right now my listeners can get $10 off your first order of $25 or more on gloryactive.com when you use code FIRSTORDER10. Again get $10 OFF using FIRSTORDER10, that’s “FIRST” “ORDER” and the number “10” on gloryactive.com! Don’t miss out, it’s only for a limited time! I live in their slouchy tees, tanks, and capris so I’m excited for you to give them a try at gloryactive.com!*
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I am thrilled to bring you special guest, and my very own coach, Sara Anna Powers. I refer to her as Anna and she is the one responsible for me becoming a coach as well!
If you are a woman in business (or who longs to have a business) this episode is for YOU!
We got real about some of the following topics:
- What is a coach?
- Who should hire a coach?
- What qualities to look for in hiring a coach
- Who really is the Proverbs 31 woman?
- Practical tips for someone who wants to build an online business but has limited time
- Why Christian women need to shift their mindset on being paid for their work online
You can find Sara Anna's freebie here:
www.saraannapowers.com/success
As well as my freebie on overcoming fear here: 3 Steps to Overcome Fear & Pursue Your Dreams
Connect with Sara Anna:
www.sarannapowers.com
www.facebook.com/saraannapowers
Connect with Rachael
www.facebook.com/rachaeljoygilbert
www.instagram.com/rachaeljgilbert
www.rachaelgilbert.com
Get more information about my coaching here: www.rachaelgilbert.com/coaching
Cheering for you!
Rachael Joy
On this week's episode of Real Talk with Rachael I interviewed my friend and fellow Declare Conference team member, Kristin Lemus.
Several weeks ago after I spoke at an event, one of my listeners happened to be in the audience, and after she asked me this question, "How do you pursue your dreams as a busy mom of littles?".
I knew this was a great question that many women have wrestled with so I prayed about who could tackle it with love and grace. God immediately put Kristin on my heart because I have watched her do this very thing so well.
Here are a few things we chatted about:
- Kristin's heart for Brave Moms
- How to pursue your dreams when you have little kids at home
- How to be a spirit lead decision maker
- Kristin's heart for the Declare Conference
- And so much more!
At the end of the episode, I mentioned that we have a few $200 off discount codes for you to use towards the purchase of a Declare Conference ticket. You can go HERE to grab that ticket and use code VIPRachael.
Please note, when I say I have a few, I mean it so when they are gone they are GONE. Use it quickly if you are thinking of attending!
Connect with Kristin:
www.bravemoms.com
www.instagram.com/bravemoms
Connect with Rachael:
www.rachaelgilbert.com
www.instagram.com/rachaeljgilbert
www.facebook.com/rachaeljoygilbert
This week's podcast interview is with special guest, LaTan Murphy. If you knew the difficulties we had to overcome in recording this episode you would laugh out loud. Let's just say my house had severe water damage the day before so I had to improvise by going to my husband's clinic after hours. I was in rare form for this episode and I think you are going to love how real and down to earth our conversation was as we chatted about courage.
LaTan is a self-proclaimed chicken who recently wrote a book on courage, called "Courageous Women of the Bible". Each chapter of her book has a Courage Quest and we went through a few of the quest questions on our interview.
A few questions we discussed:
- What inspired you to write a book on courage?
- Have you ever experience a time in your life when you felt called to lead but felt ill-equipped to do so?
- Have you ever self-appointed yourself to a position of leadership?
- Does your personal shame hinder you from conversing with Jesus?
- How do you deal with shame?
- Naked courage - what is it and how do we do it within marriage?
- What foxes should we be aware of inside and outside of marriage?
You are going to LOVE our conversation so make sure you take some time to listen!
DON'T FORGET, Erin Condren is the show sponsor and they are giving away a $75 gift card to one lucky listener who leaves a review on the show in iTunes in the month of August.
I get to give away a copy of LaTan's book so be sure to follow me over on Instagram to enter to win!
You can connect with Latan on her website: http://latanmurphy.com/
And on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/latanmurphy
Keeping Things Real,
Rachael Joy
www.rachaelgilbert.com
www.instagram.com/rachaeljgilbert
www.facebook.com/rachaeljoygilbert
This week on Real Talk with Rachael I was honored to sit down with Jen Schmidt of the popular blog, Beauty & Bedlam.
Jen wrote the book "Just Open the Door" and a few of things we chatted about were:
- How she got started 10 years ago as a blogger (and what she wished she had known)
- The heart behind her book
- Serving vs entertaining
- Practical tips for hospitality, especially for busy women
- Creative ideas for those who don't have a large home
- Ideas for food to serve, especially since so many people have food allergies
- How to make sure people don't feel left out
Special thank you to the show sponsor, Erin Condren.
You can shop their beautiful life planners HERE.
PLUS, everyone who leaves an iTunes review in August gets entered in a giveaway for a $75 gift card from Erin Condren!
To leave an iTunes review:
- Select the Real Talk with Rachael show on iTunes. Make sure you are on the show’s page.
- Click “Ratings and Reviews” under the podcast name.
- Click “Write a Review” under the Customer Reviews section.
- Write and submit your review! Thank you so much!
Follow Jen:
www.instagram.com/jenschmidt_beautyandbedlam
www.beautyandbedlam.com
Follow Rachael:
www.instagram.com/rachaeljgilbert
www.rachaelgilbert.com
In this week's episode, I was able to sit down with Pastor Jan Greenwood and do some real talk about sickness and healing.
Here are a few things we chatted about:
- Jan's own testimony of battling cancer
- Lies about sickness & healing
- How to practically support the sick
- How to pray for the sick
This episode ran a little long because our conversation was so powerful I didn't want to cut it off. Jan closed with a prayer over anyone who is fighting sickness or injury that I am believing is going to release supernatural healing.
Special thanks to the show sponsor, Glory Active. When you use code FIRSTORDER10 you get $10 OFF your first order of $25! You can shop the Glory Active site HERE.
Buckle your seat belt because this week's podcast episode is full of #realtalk.
I interviewed Jamila Jackson, founder of Loved & Blessed Box, and we dove head first into some hot topics. We chatted about:
- Depression: her battle with it and how she overcomes
- Redemption: how God has used her struggles with depression and infertility to birth her company that is all about encouraging others
- Idols: we both came clean on our love (or hate) of clothes and people's approval
- Judgment: Jamila shares a story about how God revealed she was judging others
Loved & Blessed is this week's show sponsor and they have a fun gift for YOU!
Grab your subscription box HERE and use code realtalk for a special gift with your order!
As always, don't forget to leave those iTunes review! They help other people, just like you, find the show!
Keeping things real,
Rachael Joy
This week's guest on Real Talk with Rachael is Elaine Fisher, who is a mom of 4 littles, speaker, pastor's wife and also my cousin. She is the daughter of Pastor Robert & Debbie Morris, founders of Gateway Church, and she exudes the same level of excellence and grace as her parents.
A few things we chatted about:
- How she remembers me when I first married my husband (we are cousins through marriage and let's just say I was a bit timider when I first met them!)
- How she finds value in the hidden seasons of life, like raising her 4 kids who are 4 years old and under. She refers to them as her mini circus :)
- Her powerful testimony
- Life growing up as a pastor's kid
- What pastors wish more people knew and understood (and how we can truly support them)
- She finishes by sharing a word in due season that is POWERFUL so stay tuned to the very end!
Cultivate What Matters is the show sponsor and they are offering two things for our listeners:
- They are giving away TWO Write the Word journals. You can enter to win one by leaving an iTunes review of the Real Talk with Rachael podcast in the month of July. You can enter to win the other over on Instagram.
- 10 % OFF a Write the Word journal for the month of July (one journal per person). Use code realtalkrachael
SHOP HERE!
You can follow Elaine on Instagram and on her website and her mini circus. :)
Join me as I chat with Bridgette Reed, a successful online business owner and busy mom of two. She gets real about how her business was born and how God used the hardest time in her life to birth a dream. She shares practical tips you can apply immediately to find purpose and engage with your audience.
Things we chat about:
- Her infertility story (and how her business was born in that season)
- Being Superwoman (and why we should lay this down)
- Practical Business Tips
- Practical Social Media Tips
- A word of encouragement to fellow online business owners or women in ministry
Follow Bridgette:
www.instagram.com/missbridgettem
www.doinglifewithbridgette.com
www.oliviasophiainc.com
Follow Rachael to enter to WIN a journal from Bridgette's shop!
www.instagram.com/rachaeljgilbert
www.rachaelgilbert.com
Join me for quick 7 minutes today as we pray over the men in our lives and call out the gifts God has placed within them. It's raw, real, unedited, no frills but straight from the Lord. I pray it blesses you.
Xoxo,
Rachael
You are going to love this week's guest, Crystal Stine.
In this episode we chat about:
- Her NEW book (releasing this week) called Holy Hustle
- Real Talk behind the process she went through to write a book and how she experienced rejection in the book proposal process (and why she is SO thankful that her original book idea didn't get approved!).
- Hurdles she overcame to write her book
- Broken friendships & how she found her tribe
- Where the dream "Holy Hustle" came from and what it means to her (and what she prays her readers will glean from it).
- Tips for someone who wants to launch a ministry or business
- How to find your voice in your writing & speaking
- How to be OK with your message, even if it has been done before
- Why it's important to get in real life community
PLUS, be sure to scroll to the bottom of the post and enter to WIN a copy of her book, Holy Hustle!
Primally Pure Skincare is the sponsor of this week's podcast episode and they have a coupon code for YOU!
I have searched high and low for an all natural deodorant that doesn't leave me smelling worse that I started (the struggle is real). I finally found one from Primally Pure and I am doing the happy dance for days over here. I've also tried several of their other products that I love as well. Use code realtalkrachael for 10% off your order for the month of June ONLY.
Real Talk tees for SALE!
For two weeks ONLY, this super fun slouchy tee (my favorite) from She Creates in Joy is on sale! You can also grab the tank too! The Real Talk with Rachael podcast gets a portion of the sale of each shirt so you are supporting the show as well.
To enter to WIN a copy of Holy Hustle, head to this post:
www.rachaelgilbert.com/holyhustle
In this episode, we do some real talk with Rebekah Hargraves on lies moms believe and overcoming mom guilt.
Rebekah is the author of "Lies Moms Believe and How the Gospel Refutes them". A few things we chat about in our short 30 minutes:
- Real talk on "what is motherhood"?
- Common lies moms believe
- How to be real with each other about motherhood
- The truth about identity and how it relates to motherhood
- How to take our thoughts captive in motherhood
- What God taught her as she wrote a book on motherhood
- How I (Rachael) really felt when called to motherhood & how I wrestled with resentment
- Mommy guilt & how to combat it
You can follow Rebekah at:
www.hargraveshomeandhearth.com
www.instagram.com/rebekahhargraves
To enter to WIN a copy of "Lies Moms Believe and How the Gospel Refutes Them" head over to:
www.rachaelgilbert.com/lies-moms-believe
In this conversation with Dr. Cassie Reid, we tackle the big topics that every woman encounters.
What we chat about:
- How & Why to Lean into negative emotions
- Dealing with the loss of a mother
- Overcoming mother wounds
- Setting healthy boundaries
- Owning your role as a mom and woman
- Overcoming anxiety
- Cheering vs. Comparing
You can connect with Dr. Reid here:
www.instagram.com/cassie_reid
www.cassiereid.com
www.tku.edu
Dr. Reid launched Cassie Reid Counseling in 2010 to utilize spiritual freedom, learned therapy and a variety of other techniques to provide clients with powerful plans to combat any problems they face. Combined with her professional experience - serving as a school counselor and special educator in a North Texas school district, interning at the University of Texas Southwestern Medical Center, managing the Texas Woman’s University Counseling and Family Therapy Clinic, working as a member of the National Institute of Health research grant in pain management, partnering with numerous grief organizations and currently serving as Director of Master of Marriage & Family Therapy graduate degree program at The King's University — gives Dr. Reid an excellent combination of skill and approachability that enables her to provide her clients with counseling and therapy best suited to their needs, using a counseling style fine-tuned through her educational and professional journey thus far. Dr. Reid and her family are active members of Gateway Church in Southlake, TX.
If you have breath in your body, you have a dream in your heart. Join me for this short, 9-minute podcast on how to confidently pursue your God-given dreams.
Follow Rachael:
www.rachaelgilbert.com
www.instagram.com/rachaeljgilbert
www.facebook.com/realtalkrachael
Raise your hand if you have, or are currently, walked through a difficult season. Raise the other hand if you have or currently struggle with anxiety.
My guess is that every single person reading this raised both hands.
I am excited to bring this new podcast episode to you on "Expecting Blessings During Difficult Seasons".
I had the privilege of interviewing my friend, Diana Burks, on this topic just days before my dad had a very invasive back surgery. God knew I needed to hear this message because I leaned on so much truth and wisdom that I gleaned from recording this episode.
Some things we chat about:
- A difficult season Diana walked through and what God taught her
- Real Talk about anxiety, how it emerged in a difficult season & how she combats it
- Practical tips for someone currently in a difficult season
- The truth about God during these difficult seasons
- Her heart & ministry for young girls
- Her new book, "Ignite Your Influence" releasing this year
You can connect with Diana here:
- Ignite Influence Ministries
- God's Girls Greatness
To enter to WIN the book by Joyce Meyer, go here:
www.rachaelgilbert.com
www.instagram.com/rachaeljgilbert
Feeling stuck or defeated? Have 10 minutes to spare today? If you answered yes to either of those questions, this podcast is for you!
Join your host, Rachael Gilbert, for a short inspirational clip pulled directly from one of her Facebook live videos.
We discuss TWO things to do when your confidence is shaken as you move toward your God-given dreams!
Follow Rachael:
www.rachaelgilbert.com
www.instagram.com/rachaeljgilbert
www.facebook.com/realtalkrachael
In this episode, we do some real talk about body image with the author of "Compared to Who", Heather Creekmore. We discuss the real culprit behind body image issues as well as how Heather made her debut on the Netflix show, "Nailed It".
What we discuss:
- The elephant in the room when it comes to body image
- How Heather stumbled upon being an author and why she struggles with that title
- The cure for our body image struggles
- Practical tips on raising girls to have a healthy body image
- How Heather got invited to be on the reality tv show, "Nailed It"
- And so much more!
Where you can follow Heather:
- www.comparedtowho.me
- Instagram: @comparedtowho
- www.facebook.com/heathercreekmoreblog
To enter to WIN Heather's book head over to Rachael's blog:
http://rachaelgilbert.com/category/real-talk-with-rachael/
Welcome to the first episode of Real Talk with Rachael!
In this episode, we briefly discuss:
Who is this Rachael Gilbert girl?
Why does she feel completely unqualified to start this podcast and why she is doing it anyway.
What you can expect from the podcast in each episode.
Note: the frequency of how often new episodes release is subject to change because, let's be real, seasons of life change!
Links:
www.rachaelgilbert.com
www.facebook.com/realtalkrachael
www.instagram.com/rachaeljgilbert