The Motivation Burrito: Recent Episodes
Melissa Rodriguez
A unique, flavorful blend of conversation and self expression. Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/melissa-rodriguez08/support
triggerwarning #suicide #mentalhealth #anxiety #depression #awareness #survival --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/melissa-rodriguez08/support
Over the last few months, I've strayed from who I am and my purpose with this podcast. But no matter what, whether you are in your light or in your darkness, you deserve to be loved and you deserve to be safe--- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/appSupport this podcast: https://anchor.fm/melissa-rodriguez08/support
TW: Suicide Awareness. Talking about the celebrity deaths at the hands of Suicide and what it looks like for some. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/appSupport this podcast: https://anchor.fm/melissa-rodriguez08/support
Warning: Talks of suicide, mental illness, abuse.
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Disclaimer: talks of suicide/triggers/sensitive topics
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Trigger Warnings: Pregnancy, abortion, mental health, anxiety, depression. Talking on the importance of women's health and mental health. They are both so deeply intertwined.
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The Purge is another one of those personal development processes not often talked about. Sometimes it can even look like a depression. But what makes a purge different is that it's very instinctual. And also very hard. So here's my current experience.
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I recently decided to work with my boyfriend and his business Solar Pro Roofing. I talk about what I've learned so far and why I think more people should go solar. For more info, check out Solar Pro Roofing on Facebook and Instagram!
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When my abusive relationship ended, I had to move back home. That weekend I came back to pick up my things and found them all in trash bags. Not only did I feel like my things were being discarded, I felt like I was being discarded too. To me, trash bag trauma is a real thing. Although, that's probably not the official name for it, but you get the idea.
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God is Ugly. There I said it. And a lot of people are probably going to be angry but I don't care. We've all been there. Our world turned upside down and we go through a shit storm. We pray and pray and end up in a moment of truth. We have to make a choice, we can't stay here. But when we're scared, God chooses for us, and it's often ugly, messy and painful.
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This is the most vulnerable episode I've ever recorded. In this episode, I share what my anxiety and depression look like and feel like for me. Mental illness is not a joke, mental illness is serious. And the more we call fake or uneducated attention to it, the more we put those who genuinely experience it at risk.
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This episode is all over the place lol. It's supposed to be about mental health, but I actually said in this episode I was going to call it Podcasts, Painting and Death because my numbers have tanked. But as I kept going through this episode I realized that everything I do has a common theme: they're forms of expression. There's also an action question for the day: How can I expand my capacity to receive? Tune in for all the deets and actionable tasks!
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It all started with the Steve and the Blues Clues video. It really hit me in the feels and it made me realize that I forgot about a lot of things. Including the reason why I started this podcast in the first place. Take a listen and enjoy!
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My first vacation with my boyfriend, we went to Cape May. There was this house where the foundations looked like a game of Jenga. Parts seemed to be missing and I wondered how that house was still standing! Sometimes this happens in life. Our foundations are shaken and we wonder how we're still standing when it seemed like the weight would cause us to collapse.
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The Lion's Gate portal is officially open and this weekend rocked me. Every year this crazy portal causes a little shake up and causes a pivotal moment: run or heal. The last two years, I've made the decision to heal what needed to be healed and move forward in courage and confidence. This year, the Universe confirmed my decision in a BIG way. Check it out.
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I had an awesome session with my therapist who basically told me I should be one. Even though that's too much school and money, it did help me realize that I possess a pretty cool set of skills and awareness. It was also the kick in the butt I needed to record another episode. I'm wondering if I should make this a thing? Taco Tuesday Therapy lol.
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The last few episodes of my podcast have been really emotional, lots more crying than I wanted and I started to feel like I couldn't bring anything positive to the table. I then realized, I had too much on my plate and I needed to decide where I wanted to focus my energy. I knew that first and foremost, I wanted to be present in my new relationship and see where it goes. I knew I had a great guy, I just needed to give him that time and space. So here's what's been happening!
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I'm just putting it out there at this point. I fell so hard for my boyfriend and I love him. But tonight I fucked up because I let my anxiety take control. And I may have just damaged my relationship in the process. So here's another tear fest of an episode.
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I feel like I'm failing as a girlfriend. And if you didn't think that could be a thing, it's a fucking thing. And it's a shitty feeling at that. Knowing that you deeply care about your SO and finding yourself struggling in the relationship is not a good place to be in. What's worse is this overwhelming fear that this person will change their mind about you. So here I am, in pure emotion of course, trying to be a better girlfriend.
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I honestly didn't know what to title this. It feels like God/The Universe just hit fast forward and I never expected I'd be recording this episode and talking about my new relationship. And yet, here I am, the happiest I've ever been. The Universe really can be magic!
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Things got a little weird the last couple weeks. I'm talking like heavy in the emotions weird, which you guys know by now, I just don't like to do. But as much as I've spent most of my life avoiding them, I felt like I needed to lean in. Because if I'm going to continue to heal this emotional eating, and even heal my mind, I have to show up. And not just show up, but learn to stay present. So let's get weird, let's get emotional. I mean, that's how we grow right?
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This episode is a recap of the last 6 months in my journey. From committing to my physical health, to my struggles emotionally and spiritually. I had to learn the hard way, but I guess that just earned me some XP points and an extra life. I also briefly discuss some things related to American Heart Health month and ways to keep your heart healthy.
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Once again, I tanked with another guy. And honestly I'm tired. I'm throwing in the towel on dating. Because dating with mental health issues is hard and there are not many who understand what it's like or what goes on inside our heads. And it's not like you can put that info on your dating profile without judgment. It's a guaranteed rejection. So I tanked. Because my thoughts got away from me. And now it's midnight, I'm recording this episode and can't stop crying.
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The Maneater. She's a dangerous woman. As the song says, she'll chew you up. But that's because nobody knows her secret. Her big secret. The Maneater is actually highly emotionally aware. There's a reason why she keeps it secret though. In fact, the Maneater is more relatable than we think. Tune in to find out why!
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Today I was having a ton of mixed feelings and emotions on a lot of things. I know the lesson is ultimately a lesson on receiving and allowing, but I've just been so tired of asking for things and limiting myself or feeling like momentum stops. So instead of having just a slice of what I want, I'm ready for the whole damn cake.
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I checked out the last couple weeks. I honestly got to the point where I just was so emotionally exhausted that I didn't care anymore. I couldn't see a reason to stay in the game and to keep playing. And to be honest, I'm still kind of checked out. But I'm trying to check back in. Not easy to do though when you feel like you're walking without a line of sight. So what do you do?
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This episode is different. Once upon a time, I wanted to write a RomCom novel. I had the main characters lined out. I spent hours researching their names and was super excited to be able to bring them to life. But I didn't. I never wrote the book, I never brought them to life. I abandoned them. Until this week, when something told me I needed to talk about Harley Jade, and it wasn't until the day of this episode, that I realized why.
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The Dark Place, void, depression, whatever you want to call it, is a place that nobody likes to talk about. It's a place that I've honestly been in for a while. And while there are moments when I have pulled myself out, those moments are temporary and something happens to pull me back in. I honestly don't know where this road takes me, but I know that right now, there may be someone in this space that needs to know they're not alone
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This week I actually joined a dating site. Wild, I know. So why not have a conversation about dating, breakups, breakdowns, and breaking the rules. Plus a really interesting story or two.
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I rewrote this description like 10 times. The last time I recorded an episode for the men, I was in a space of resistance, but I also was learning how to see men differently. Recently, while looking within my own heart, I started to think about what's in the heart of men? Specifically, what's in the heart of the men in my life. And how can I connect with them on a deeper level? How can I see them, love them, and let them know they are truly appreciated? How can I make them feel safe in my space? This episode looks at and honors not just the man, but the treasure in his heart.
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Title Change! I noticed that this is something I say to my friends a lot. I didn't fully understand why until I recently had a session where I talked about denial and abandonment. I realized that me saying "I'm not going anywhere" is one of the ways I cope with these two things. That because I never want anyone to feel abandoned, I feel the need to reinforce that I'm always here. Take a listen to what I discovered.
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Christmas is my favorite holiday. Second is Thanksgiving lol. To me, there's nothing greater than Christmas lights, coffee, hot chocolate, warm blankets, cozy socks, etc. When it comes to Christmas, I'm a Master at gifting. And yet, all my gifts, have something in common, which to me, is the greatest gift.
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This episode is a kind of poetic insight to the madness of this year. Some of us have weathered some crazy storms. We've endured our darkest days, even when the storm has felt never-ending and massively overwhelming.
If you're like me, it felt like you left everything behind. You walked into the storm brave and confident, and then realized, you have no jacket, no umbrella. You're vulnerable, you're exposed, you're unprotected.
The question becomes, do you move forward in faith? Or do you move forward in fear?
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I've decided to take a week, maybe two to take time for my mental and emotional health. In this episode, I share how the grief that has been felt in this year finally came to a head. The last few days I've spent a lot of time crying and releasing a ton of emotions. So I'll be taking time to integrate these feelings and tap into that deeper vulnerability. Stay well everyone, be back soon!
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This year has been quite a crazy year. Today, I turn 33 and if I could stop time, I honestly would. As I reflect on the last couple of months, I really felt like there's still something missing. While social media will remind everyone of my birthday, I find myself wondering more about the genuine connections vs the quantity of comments I'll receive. So here's an emotional rant of sorts lol.
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It's Election Week and all throughout social media I've seen a lot of people talk about Election Anxiety and fears surrounding what is to potentially come. I almost didn't record this because there's already enough opinions floating on the internet, but I did want to acknowledge the anxiety is real, and it's ok to take the time and space needed to ensure your mental health and safety. Stay well my avocados!
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I decided to record an episode about the Instagram series I did called Stripped Down. There were things I wanted to share and say but didn't because I felt like people wouldn't read it. And yet, I recorded it anyway. So here's me, stripping down the layers. To be seen, to be heard, to be loved.
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I am super excited to have Katherine Elizabeth on this overdue episode. Katherine is the person behind the awesome logo and branding of The Motivation Burrito and has given life to what was a crazy idea. She captured the essence of me, of this podcast and she's just so EPIC. Not only that, but in true Burrito styles, she shares how during our time together, we underwent a process of shifting and "belief wars". Did I mention, she's EPIC?
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After talking about this topic on and off for a few episodes, I finally dug deep into the topic and sat with my own resistance. Especially since I hit a wall last week and was unable to record Friday's episode. By taking the time and space needed to do this, I finally came up with 4 ways to start moving past the resistance. Keep in mind, this is just a starting point, but having the awareness and having a place to start is better than being stuck! If any of these work for you, please let me know!
GREAT NEWS: Website is now Live! Check out www.themotivationburrito.com and check us out on IG @themotivationburrito and Facebook: The Motivation Burrito Podcast
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If you haven't figured it out by now, I have a wild love for tacos and burritos. I had this crazy thought that maybe I should do a boudoir shoot but like with food. Foodoir. Except there's already a definition for foodoir and it's not that!!! How disappointing! Still, I talk about my genius idea and how Foodoir Photography needs to be a thing.
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A couple of years ago, I had this idea for a book that I was going to call Tonight We W(h)ine. In this gem of a book would be a wine pairing for each mood, situation or whatever was going on in our lives. The subtitle was just as great: Unbelievably True Stories About Life: Best Served with a Drink or Three. But since I never had the time or did the research necessary for this book, I decided to dive into what wines would go best with the Shit Storm of Emotions I've been feeling! Enjoy!
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In honor of Breast Cancer Awareness month, we're taking Ta-Tas while enjoying some tacos and tequila. This episode ends with a tribute to my fur friend Dewey, who we unfortunately had to let go of.
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It's shadow season. And I apologize in advance if the recording comes in and out, I was mobile while recording this one! Shadow season can be a very difficult time for a lot of people and this year doesn't make it easier. But moving through it is crucial to our growth, and it's in this space where magic can happen.
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Last week's episode received mix reactions and to be honest, it threw me for a loop. I couldn't understand how such an important, profound, pivotal moment in my life didn't land and that I actually ended up having to explain or justify myself. And then I realized, it all comes down to what we have been programmed to believe and that a lot of us are still holding on to the idea that being vulnerable or emotional is not okay. So this is a very important message on the impact these beliefs have.
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This week was like the week of triggers, memories and past pains. A lot of stuff came up for me to the point where I not only imploded, but I spent a whole day and a half of crying. While September and October usually seem to be a season of grieving and releasing, I have done this long enough to know it doesn't have to be and that together, we can move through it better. It won't always be easy, but it will be worth it.
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September 15th started Hispanic Heritage month. This year is different for me, because I have finally embraced ALL of who I am. But for a while, I had completely disconnected from my Hispanic heritage and when people asked, I would avoid answering the question. Tune in to learn some fun basic facts and to hear my story!
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I've avoided talking about this for privacy reasons, but I wanted to share a little bit about my family! As someone who comes from a large family, and who is of Hispanic heritage, family is very important to me. Not only that, but I believe that friends become family too, and so I share a little bit about my beliefs, some traditions and of course, my family!
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Recorded on Thursday 9/10, World Suicide Prevention Day. But also, a conversation about what's been going on inside my head. I've been resisting my emotions and feelings and I've mentioned some of the things I struggle with. I finally share the story of WHY I struggled with this to begin with. I've been scared to share this story full out, I've only talked about bits and pieces previously, but if I'm going to encourage self-expression, I need to be able to do the same.
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I brought on my friend Chad from high school to finish the conversation about long distance relationships. We also get into some personal experiences, chat about sex, orgasms, and bring it back to the Erotic Blueprint. Check this one out. It was SO much fun!
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I don't have a catchy title for this one today. Talking about exciting updates and how the branding is going, then I go off on a wild tangent about traveling before finally getting into the topic of long distance relationships.
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Mostly discussing fear and how we tend to create a sense of impending doom. But it's in the moment where we can take that leap of faith, where we truly see that what we created in our mind is not entirely real. And if you can even master that, and clear your path and TRUST, you may even find yourself quantum leaping to your desires.
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The Greeks mention there are 4 types of love. Most of them we know and our brains are trained to only say I love you in these scenarios. But Agape, spiritual love, or universal love, tells us to love unconditionally, without judgment, with kindness, and compassion. A very wise person taught me this lesson this week and I'm here to share how it made me feel.
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Over the last couple weeks, I've shared about my struggles with my weight. I finally shared that the reason why is because it's holding me back from showing up for my listeners. I'm scared and ashamed to show my face, to have a branded photo shoot, to show who I am. I want to be fully present so I'm inviting you all on my journey back to health and happiness.
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Sometimes we find ourselves surrounded by thoughts of doubt, of lies we tell ourselves, feelings of unworthiness, etc. I call this the Devil's Playground because it's the thing that keeps us from seeing the light, or from being with higher vibes and consciousness. I experienced this in a way that sent me down a rabbit hole of anxiety and fear.
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Last week I had a moment. I was mad at God. I had a very frustrating afternoon and I realized a lot of what I was feeling was surrounding old values and old beliefs. I reached out to my group and they assured me that it was okay to feel the things I felt. I realized my truth is changing, and that I'm expressing myself more honestly, and I'm shifting what needs to be shifted.
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This is actually a fun episode. I share some of my favorite things, both "surface level" like favorite celebrities, food, etc, right down to more personal and thought provoking questions. Because at the end of the day, I want ya'll to love me lol.
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This past weekend was super emotional as I opened up about a past relationship. To be honest, I almost gave up hope. Until I received some friendly little reminders that what I want, wants me and the only way I can receive the right partner and soulmate is to Trust again. I share my favorite love stories on the type of love I'm looking for, and trusting that it's already here!
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This is probably one of the harder episodes I've recorded. I won't say hardest, because you never know what life throws your way. I decided I needed to record this, to stand in my truth, and it was super important to release this on the day it was recorded, which is a Saturday. And even though it's outside the "normal" scheduled time, the message was too important to wait until that Tuesday. Plus, there's magic in sharing something on the first of the month. My intention for this podcast is to create a safe space for others, but today, I decided to step into my own safe space, and be honest, fully open, vulnerable and super RAW.
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I'm back after taking a one episode break. Ermahgerd, Melissa, where WERE you? In my break time, I had a conversation that led to some thoughts about what happens when things in our lives no longer fit. And I'm not just talking about clothes. I'm talking about things like work, relationships, etc. What do you do when you start to outgrow these things? Tune in!
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Announcement: I will be taking a break on Tuesday from recording to rejuvenate and recharge. I have also said YES to phase 2 of branding so that I can have a new logo and some amazing visuals.
About the Episode: During my self-exploration and self-discovery journey, I found myself constantly dating the same 3 Ds: Darkness, the Devil and Destiny. My experiences with them have been different, but it has also taught me to communicate my needs BETTER and at all times, not just the good times. It has also taught me about my true purpose, and my quest for knowledge and the truth. What Ds have you dated? What lessons have these 3 Ds taught you?
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I have been feeling it the past couple of weeks and I've been itching for what I call the Melissa Makeover. Rather than running and spending money on hair dyes, makeup palettes and outfits, I decided to share with you all some of my "Must Haves" and essentials for beginner Make-up Enthusiasts. Sharing really is caring and I'm bringing to you ways to give yourself a little confidence boost when you're feeling a little low vibe.
Check me out on Facebook at The Motivation Burrito Podcast and share some thoughts, feedback, questions or even ideas on some topics. As I look to start phase 2 of branding, I'm also asking for help, which for me is a big deal.
On a personal level, follow me on Instagram: melissa_5self
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When things start to shift in your life, some of the processes that you go through are purging and integrating. In purging, you start to clear out space for new blessings and open the doors of receiving. In the integration process, you start to channel the truest version of you, while integrating parts of your "old self" that you want to keep. To do both processes at once? Yikes! While it's not easy to navigate, it's possible! Listen to learn how!
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When it comes to processing emotions, I'm really bad at it and tend to avoid it at all costs. There's something that's been on my mind for almost two weeks now that I needed to share. This is something I have yet to share with my own group/sisterhood, and I'm revealing it here because I feel safe to do so. But if I don't acknowledge it now, it will surely lead to emotional chaos later!
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I had a setback this week. As I come upon an "anniversary" of a series of events that changed my life, I started to fall back into patterns that keep me stuck. A conversation with myself shifted my perspective and I wanted to share with you.
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After years of being single, I made a very important personal declaration: I'm available. The term single became an excuse for me to stay unavailable and keep my walls up. To declare myself available means inviting in deeper conversations and calling in someone who has the capacity to acknowledge their feelings, someone with emotional intelligence. In these uncertain times, calling in a partner can be scary, as the person to person interaction is limited and restricted. How can we still make ourselves available in the midst of a pandemic?
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This week I've been highly distracted and I started to feel like I've failed. Failed at this podcast, failed my audience and failed myself. I'm facing these feelings head-on and working through them in real time because I know I'm not the only one.
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I talk about the thing a lot of us don't like to talk about. Mostly because I'm going through it and this is honestly when I feel the least motivated to do anything. Self-care helps and you can help too!
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My branding has been finalized and I get to share with the world my values and my "target" audience. Ideally, I'd like my podcast to be for anyone who could use a little motivation, but we have a special place here for the Avocados, those who were made to believe that they are bland and undesired, when really, they're the extra goodness!
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I'm getting a tattoo this week now that the shops are re-opening and I wanted to share what my tattoo will be and why. Most of my tattoos have meaning to me and this one definitely symbolizes the growth I've experienced this year.
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Quick recap of previous episodes because I made it to episode 10!!! Main topic is how the seven deadly sins show up in our lives. It's not just a spiritual concept, it's emotions that we move through, or resist moving through. I believe that they become sins when we stay stuck there. In times of chaos, crisis and overwhelm, awareness is key to the positive outcome, or "virtues".
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Inspired by an actor I follow on Twitter, how often do we walk through life feeling like we are not enough? Why do we feel that way? What are we measuring ourselves to? Measurements are for school, furniture and clothes people. Our self-worth should not be defined by a tangible unit of measurement! Maybe one day, said actor will catch wind of my podcast, listen to all the goodness and know that they are not alone!
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In this episode, I talk about Fairy Tales and how we often chase happy endings and dreams that aren't even ours. I fully believe that the happy ending is already there and that the true beauty is in the journey.
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Honoring my statement to join the conversation of Black Lives Matter, I share with my audience how my Ancestry DNA brought up feelings of guilt and shame around the movement. As someone who discovered there's African in my blood, I stand proud in learning more about my culture but feared judgment from both sides. Can you truly claim yourself to be "part black" if you haven't experienced the oppression and the prejudice? I share my thoughts on all of this.
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One of my favorite topics. I get to totally Fan Girl out and talk about my favorite show Teen Wolf, while also discussing how much of our daily lives is tied to Self. Self-esteem, self-worth, self-expression, etc.
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This is a short, mini bonus episode about joining the conversation of #blacklivesmatter. It's so important and very much needed
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In this episode I talk about ghosts that can keep you from moving forward, and how you can face them on your own!
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May is Mental Health Awareness month and in this episode I share my experiences with anxiety, depression and bullying.
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Disclaimer: I am not a relationship expert and much of this is based on observation and experience. In part 2, I discuss how the pandemic affects our external relationships with family, friends, significant others and work and how the same 20 seconds of courage I took, you can take too!
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The Premiere episode of The Motivation Burrito. In this two part episode, I discuss how this pandemic has changed my relationship with myself and the 20 seconds of courage that helped me start this podcast.
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