Enjoy!: Recent Episodes
Mark Mallman
The adventure is never beginning or ending. The adventure is constant. It crosses the expanse of the mind through endless landscapes, and comes to life from the body to open minds and bring hearts together. My drummer Aaron Lemay says “If it doesn't make you happy or money, it's not worth your time.”
Ant makes a bucket list then raps about it. Attack of the huge leather couch. Computer raps about how it is the captain now. Interspecies birds. Frogs don't like U2. I wish I understood these feelings (a musical contemplation)
Ice is like a bank account of water. Pineapple gas station soda. A deer hit us! Remember the 20th Century. Computers discuss open mindedness. Shark Vegetarian. Jimmy Buffet Sleeplessness Paralysis Syndrome. Computer Poetry Reading. A Winter Journal Entry.
Everybody is the world's worst driver. Fishing in the fragmented night, I'll throw it all back before I catch it. A one minute history of the art of Mark Rothko. Plus, The Circle of Bad Driving. Your existentialism won't be accepted. Enjoy!
Are you surprised that the planet is trying to destroy us after all the years of us trying to destroy it? In fact the Earth is bigger than a billionaires ego. It's bigger than all our Netflix cues combined. No one talks about acid rain anymore. Also, a rap called Lobster Telephone. Enjoy!
An ant walks into a karaoke bar and sings the theme to Family Ties. It is not well received. Poor ant. Corporate facts are laws of finance in the form of a rap song. Also, a story about hitting bugs with the minivan. Enjoy!
New technology that translates dog into human, also modern science suggests we are living in an old bag of smashed Chex mix. Plus these massive hits: A Billy Idol acoustic show. Hot Cookies. Swearing Ant gives Squirrel a mohawk. Enjoy!
Boredom is the evil clown's workshop. Disco Shark eats a dolphin. A guided meditation through a secret garden (casino). My game is a freaker. My Shame aint no shame pizza. Enjoy!
Nobody plays chess in Casinos, but anyone who tries the salmon at all you can eat buffets takes risks that a chess board cant afford. In god's fake chess, The apostrophe changes everything. It could be Gods chess is fake or God is fake chess, or without the apostrophe that multiple gods who play chess fake it. Enjoy!
A computer, a boy, and a turtle walk into a comedy club. None of them have good material, but the audience laughs for reasons of novelty. Also, algorithm music. These are the types of candy you wouldn't wanna put in your car: Slo Poke, Rocky Road, a Zero bar. Enjoy!
A big announcement comes and nobody cares. Mark, Squirrel, The Swearing Ant, The Dell Laptop, and Lake Shark meet up in a studio apartment Uptown for day old donuts and grape soda. Mr. Mallman has brought everyone together to celebrate the completion of his new book, The Happiness Playlist.
There are secrets we keep inside. Fantasies that forever will hide. There are dreams of life that no one can tell. Plus - Banana Planet 2: Banana Pie Planet. Driving Through Wisconsin. "Pievate Eyes" Undercover Cops and Undercover Undercover Cops. Enjoy!
You never forget the first time you wipe someone elses blood off your foot. You never forget the first time you wake up naked in an alley. You never forget the first time you pass the exit for Zzyzx Road in California. Here are some planet saving solutions for you to ...Enjoy!
Standing on the roof of the most famous movie theater in the world where inner peace means stuck in traffic, means 18 dollars for 90 minutes of parking, means a gas tank for your thoughts, means sleeping through house fires, there's a song in everything. Enjoy!
If you chew through a mini golf pencil, go back and grab another. Mini golf pencils are free. Reep the moment. Somewhere out there is a serial killer so lazy, he only ever thought about it. My emptiness, your emptiness, if I wanted to talk about emptiness I wouldn't be talking. Enjoy!
The same asteroid that wiped out the dinosaurs was shaped like a basketball and stolen by nieghborhood kids. Night after night they roam, and dream out loud of the amazing basketball championship on Mars. Enjoy!
Hear the secret confessions of a young cupcake who loved Billy Elliot The Musical, and was eaten too soon. Learn the hot new meditation style captivating today's most bakery saavy yogis: Cookie Meditation. Also, "The Shape Of Pudding". Enjoy!
If the snowman had a mouth, it would have been smiling. Bundle up. Be bored. Write your sad emotions in a snow drift. They'll all blow away tomorrow. Enjoy!
Money doesn't matter if you have money. Don't be drunk on stage, it's not professional. I tell bedtime story that scares baby Squirrels. Tinnitus. Enjoy!
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Is it possible that today's evil powers were spawned by the original trailer for Jurassic Park? I debate the ethics of love vs infatuation with the computer. A ladybug infestation and squirrel lawyers. Enjoy!
Support this podcast by visiting www.patreon.com/markmallman
Calling people by there last name is for gym teachers only. Earth is an uninhabitable wasteland where you can Venmo kombucha money, but you can't bring a cockatoo into a nightclub without paying twice the cover. Enjoy!
Support this podcast by visiting www.patreon.com/markmallman
Elephants are mystic gods. Ants are enlightened. Crows are the OG gutter punks. My whole life is musical theater. Enjoy!
Support this podcast by visiting www.patreon.com/markmallman
Prince sang that Uptown don't let society tell us how it's supposed to be. Eventually, that little dive surrendered to the bourgeoisie curtain. A shiny white Apple Store crushed it, leaving only the bouncer's Frye boots sticking out. Enjoy!
Support this podcast by visiting www.patreon.com/markmallman
I tried banana soda. I cried banana soda. Beware the warm banana soda. I dreamed you were a dog. Now I'm hiding in your shoe till summer returns. Enjoy!
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I had a birthday party for a dog then caught some mouse ghosts in my garage. The new party jam for 2004 is called "Blindsided". Enjoy!
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The espresso narc pours coffee for nobody in an attempt to prove that plants sing when picked. Enjoy! (Also, Dark Side Of The Rainbow is a sham)
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A friend hears combustable music, goth tiki rapping, and fascinating facts (totally untrue) Enjoy!
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A space rapper comes from Jupiter for coconuts, meanwhile a sassy ant knows where you live. All that's left to do now, is bet on horses and cross your coconuts. Enjoy!
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Something is wrong with the squirrels of the world when a computer has a rap battle at a job interview, now it's up to a duck to save the day. Enjoy!
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A rapping butterfly encounters vicious canoe pirates while sipping tea from a red high heal. Enjoy!
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After discovering that flying fish are optimistic about the oceans rising, a reporter interviews a ghost only to find out that the world's first snack was a dinosaur eyeball. Enjoy!
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Trapped in an abandoned Kmart? Promissory notes of mega-stardom? Fake John Lennon!? Saint Versace? Enjoy!
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I was a teenage vampire at a theme park with a ride that simulates working in a factory for thirty eight years. Enjoy!
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Quantum mechanics are working on my new muffler. Squirrels are you who you hire for bank robberies because they aren't afraid to take risks. Grape butter. Enjoy!
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The smart phone calls itself to relay a message from a talking elevator. The message is "Little rabbit don't you play tricks, now your hole is just a matrix." But what does it mean? It means Enjoy!
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In an attempt to save the Earth, a man is locked in a bathroom at his own bachelor party only to find out that bears can't afford to fix the windshield. Enjoy!
Support this podcast by visiting www.patreon.com/markmallman